MichaelOrme/Profane · Datasets at Hugging Face

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I'll be scarred for life.	No you won't.
I'll show you around when we've got this damn bed moved.	Is Julia here?
Is Julia here?	Upstairs. Treat her gently, huh? She hates moving.
Upstairs. Treat her gently, huh? She hates moving.	Surprise.
Surprise.	Kirsty.
Kirsty.	O.K. I'll be nice. You get on with the muscle work. I'll make myself some coffee.
O.K. I'll be nice. You get on with the muscle work. I'll make myself some coffee.	Kitchen's through on your left.
What?	Just go. PLEASE. I'll be O.K. I'm going to go see Dad. He'll look after me --
Just go. PLEASE. I'll be O.K. I'm going to go see Dad. He'll look after me --	What did I say?
What did I say?	Will you GO, damn you?
How can it be bullshit to state a preference?	Since when did this shop become a fascist regime?
Since when did this shop become a fascist regime?	Since you brought that bullshit tape in.
Since you brought that bullshit tape in.	Great. That's the fun of working in a record store. Playing crappy pap you don't want to listen to. I thought this tape was going to be, you know, a conversation stimulator. I was going to ask you for your top five records to play on a Monday morning and all that, and you just had to ruin it.
Great. That's the fun of working in a record store. Playing crappy pap you don't want to listen to. I thought this tape was going to be, you know, a conversation stimulator. I was going to ask you for your top five records to play on a Monday morning and all that, and you just had to ruin it.	We'll do it next Monday.
We'll do it next Monday.	Well what's the point in that?
Nice, Barry.	Rob. Top five musical crimes perpetrated by Stevie Wonder in the '80's and '90's. Subquestion -- is it in fact unfair to criticize a formerly great artist for his latter- day sins? "Is it better to burn out than to fade away?"
Rob. Top five musical crimes perpetrated by Stevie Wonder in the '80's and '90's. Subquestion -- is it in fact unfair to criticize a formerly great artist for his latter- day sins? "Is it better to burn out than to fade away?"	You just drove a fucking customer away, Barry.
You just drove a fucking customer away, Barry.	We didn't even really have it. I happen to know for a fact that the only Stevie Wonder single we have is "Don't Drive Drunk." I was just goofing on the straight, and it never cost you a penny.
We didn't even really have it. I happen to know for a fact that the only Stevie Wonder single we have is "Don't Drive Drunk." I was just goofing on the straight, and it never cost you a penny.	Not the point.
Not the point.	Oh, so what's the point then?
Oh, so what's the point then?	I don't want you talking to our customers like that again.
I don't want you talking to our customers like that again.	"Our customers?" You think that Mr. L.L. Bean out there is going to be a regular?
Barry, I'm fucking broke! I know we used to fuck with anyone who asked for anything we didn't like, but it's gotta stop.	Bullshit. The guy was going to buy one record -- which we didn't even have -- and leave and never come back again anyway. Why not have a little fun? Big fucking deal.
Bullshit. The guy was going to buy one record -- which we didn't even have -- and leave and never come back again anyway. Why not have a little fun? Big fucking deal.	What did he ever do to you?
What did he ever do to you?	He offended me with his terrible taste.
He offended me with his terrible taste.	It wasn't even his terrible taste. It was his daughter's.
It wasn't even his terrible taste. It was his daughter's.	Oh, now you're defending that motherfucker? You're going soft in your old age, Rob. There was a time when you would have chased him out of the store and up the street. Now all of a sudden I'm offending your golf buddy. You're right, Rob. I am so sorry. How are we ever going to make enough money to get you and Laura into the country club?
We're only on the fucking list for Marie's gig at the Pulaski Pub, that's all! All three of us.	That's fucking great, Barry. We can spend fifteen bucks on a cab to save five each. Fantastic, Barry!
That's fucking great, Barry. We can spend fifteen bucks on a cab to save five each. Fantastic, Barry!	We can take your car.
We can take your car.	It's not my car, now is it? It's Laura's car, and thus Laura has it. So it's an ass-bumping double- transferring bus ride through bumblefuck or a fat wad on a cab. Wow. Fucking great.
There's something different about the sound of her voice... And what did she mean last night, she hasn't slept with him yet. Yet. What does "yet" mean, anyway? "I haven't seen... Evil Dead II yet." What does that mean? It means you're going to go, doesn't it?	-- You're like a little squirrel of music, storing away dead little nuts of old garbage music, musical lint, old shit, shit, shit --
-- You're like a little squirrel of music, storing away dead little nuts of old garbage music, musical lint, old shit, shit, shit --	-- Barry, if I were to say to you I haven't seen Evil Dead II yet, what would that mean?
I'd think you were a cinematic idiot. And I'd feel sorry for you.	No, but would you think, from that one sentence. That I was going to see it?
No, but would you think, from that one sentence. That I was going to see it?	I'm sorry, Rob, but I'm struggling here. I don't understand any part of this conversation. You're asking me what I would think if you told me that you hadn't seen a film that you've seen. What am I supposed to say?
I'm sorry, Rob, but I'm struggling here. I don't understand any part of this conversation. You're asking me what I would think if you told me that you hadn't seen a film that you've seen. What am I supposed to say?	Just listen to me. If I said to you --
Just listen to me. If I said to you --	"-- I haven't seen Evil Dead II yet," yeah, yeah, I hear you --
"-- I haven't seen Evil Dead II yet," yeah, yeah, I hear you --	Would you... would you get the impression that I wanted to see it?
Would you... would you get the impression that I wanted to see it?	Well... you couldn't have been desperate to see it, otherwise you'd have already gone...
Why would they care?	Because it's a brilliant film. It's funny, violent, and the soundtrack kicks fucking ass.
Un-fucking-believable. Dick's out on a hot date, Rob's boning Marie LaSalle, and the best-looking and most intelligent of all of us isn't getting anything at all.	How do you know about that?
How do you know about that?	Oh come on, Rob. What am I, an idiot? I'm more bothered by Dick's thing. How did this happen, Dick? What rational explanation can there possibly be? What's her name?
Shut the fuck up, Barry.	Yeah, you would say that, wouldn't you? You two have to stick together now. Boners United. United in getting some.
Don't be sad, Barry. You'll find true love someday.	Suck my ass.
Suck my ass.	Terrific.
Isn't it?	That was one of the reasons they asked me to join originally, yes. But --
That was one of the reasons they asked me to join originally, yes. But --	Great! That's fucking great! They only asked you to sing because of your name! You can stick it above the browser racks over there.
Great! That's fucking great! They only asked you to sing because of your name! You can stick it above the browser racks over there.	How many tickets can I put you down for?
How many tickets can I put you down for?	None. Christ!
None. Christ!	You're not even coming?
You're not even coming?	Of course I'm not coming. Do I look like I'd want to listen to some terrible experimental racket played in some hideous cave? Where is it? The fucking Bucktown Pub? Ha!
Of course I'm not coming. Do I look like I'd want to listen to some terrible experimental racket played in some hideous cave? Where is it? The fucking Bucktown Pub? Ha!	So much for friends, then. You're a bitter bastard, Rob, you know that?
So much for friends, then. You're a bitter bastard, Rob, you know that?	Bitter? Because I'm not in Barrytown? You should be shot like a lame horse, you jerk. Just keep that out of my window.
Like fuck you are.	Laura said we could. If we helped out with the posters and stuff. And we did. And we are.
Laura said we could. If we helped out with the posters and stuff. And we did. And we are.	I'll give you 10% of the door if you don't play.
I'll give you 10% of the door if you don't play.	We're getting that anyway.
We're getting that anyway.	What is she doing? Okay, 20%.
What is she doing? Okay, 20%.	No. We need the gig.
No. We need the gig.	110%. That's my final offer. I'm not kidding. That's how much it means to me not to hear you play.
110%. That's my final offer. I'm not kidding. That's how much it means to me not to hear you play.	We're not as bad as you think, Rob.
We're not as bad as you think, Rob.	You couldn't be. Look, Barry. There's going to be people from Laura's work there, people who own dogs and babies and Tina Turner albums. How are you going to cope with them?
You couldn't be. Look, Barry. There's going to be people from Laura's work there, people who own dogs and babies and Tina Turner albums. How are you going to cope with them?	We're not called Barrytown anymore, by the by. They got sick of the Barry/Barrytown thing. We're called SDM. Sonic Death Monkey.
We're not called Barrytown anymore, by the by. They got sick of the Barry/Barrytown thing. We're called SDM. Sonic Death Monkey.	Sonic Death Monkey.
Sonic Death Monkey.	What do you think? Dick likes it.
What do you think? Dick likes it.	Barry, you're over thirty years old. You owe it to yourself and your friends and to your parents not to sing in a group called Sonic Death Monkey.
Barry, you're over thirty years old. You owe it to yourself and your friends and to your parents not to sing in a group called Sonic Death Monkey.	I owe it to myself to go right to the edge, Rob, and this group does exactly that. Over the edge, in fact.
I owe it to myself to go right to the edge, Rob, and this group does exactly that. Over the edge, in fact.	You'll be going over the fucking edge if you come anywhere near me next Friday night.
You'll be going over the fucking edge if you come anywhere near me next Friday night.	That's what we want. Reaction. And if Laura's bourgeois lawyer friends can't take it, then fuck 'em. Let 'em riot, we can handle it. We'll be ready.
Why not?	Because it's sentimental tacky crap, that's why not. Do we look like the kind of store that sells "I Just Called To Say I Loved You?" Go to the mall and stop wasting our time.
Because it's sentimental tacky crap, that's why not. Do we look like the kind of store that sells "I Just Called To Say I Loved You?" Go to the mall and stop wasting our time.	What's your problem? What did I... Why are you --
What's your problem? What did I... Why are you --	Do you even know your daughter? There is no way she likes that song. Or is she in a coma?
Holy Shiite! What the fuck's this?	It's the new --
Okay, okay -- "Leader of the Pack." The guy fucking cracks up on a cycle and dies right? "Dead Man's Curve," Jan and Dean...	Did you know that after that song was recorded, Jan himself crashed his --
Did you know that after that song was recorded, Jan himself crashed his --	-- It was Dean, you fucking idiot.
Hey Charlie.	Hey Rob.
Hey Rob.	Why did you break up with me for Marco?
Why did you break up with me for Marco?	Fuck! I knew it! You're going through one of those what-does-it- all-mean things.
Fuck! I knew it! You're going through one of those what-does-it- all-mean things.	Huh?
Huh?	There's been a rash of them, recently. I find it a little unnerving. In fact Marco called a few months back, and he wanted to see me, and rehash the past as they say, and I wasn't really up for it. Do all men go through this?
There's been a rash of them, recently. I find it a little unnerving. In fact Marco called a few months back, and he wanted to see me, and rehash the past as they say, and I wasn't really up for it. Do all men go through this?	C'mon, just answer the question. You can say what you like. What the hell?
Good. So shall we leave it at that then?	I've already left it, you pathetic rebound fuck! Now get your patchouli stink out of my store.
I'm sorry. I haven't been very fair to you. That's why I came here to the store this evening. I feel terrible, Rob. This is really hard, you know.	Good. So. Is it my job?
Good. So. Is it my job?	What? Gimme a fucking break. Is that what you think? That your not big enough a deal for me? Jesus, gimme a little credit, Rob.
What? Gimme a fucking break. Is that what you think? That your not big enough a deal for me? Jesus, gimme a little credit, Rob.	I don't know. It's one of the things I thought of.
I don't know. It's one of the things I thought of.	What were the others?
What were the others?	Just the obvious stuff.
Just the obvious stuff.	What's the obvious stuff?
What's the obvious stuff?	I don't know.
Look. Maybe you'll grow up and we'll get it together, you and me. Maybe I'll never see either of you again. I don't know. All I know is that it's not a good time to be living here.	So, what, you haven't definitely decide to dump me? There's still a chance we'll get back together?
So, what, you haven't definitely decide to dump me? There's still a chance we'll get back together?	I don't know.
I don't know.	Well, if you don't know, there's a chance, right? It's like, if someone was in the hospital and he was seriously ill and the doctor said, I don't know if he's got a chance of survival or not, then that doesn't mean the patient's definitely going to die, now does it? It means he might live. Even if it's only a remote possibility.
Well, if you don't know, there's a chance, right? It's like, if someone was in the hospital and he was seriously ill and the doctor said, I don't know if he's got a chance of survival or not, then that doesn't mean the patient's definitely going to die, now does it? It means he might live. Even if it's only a remote possibility.	I suppose so.
I suppose so.	So we have a chance of getting back together again.
So we have a chance of getting back together again.	Oh, Rob, shut up.
Oh, Rob, shut up.	Hey, I just want to know where I stand. What chance --
Hey, I just want to know where I stand. What chance --	-- I don't fucking know what chance you fucking have!
You kind of have to start with Elvis Costello, but where? "Motel Matches?" "I Want You?" "I Hope You're Happy Now?" "Green Shirt?" His records should be sealed in cases that say "in case of vicious betrayal, smash glass." "Where Did You Sleep Last Night," sure, but by Robert Johnson or by Nirvana? Maybe a Liz Phair track. There are a couple to get angry at instead of being angry with. Some devil's advocate stuff. The Silver Jews could be good when you're ready to start putting it all behind you... But I think we're getting ahead of ourselves there. Ah. Dylan. Bob fucking Dylan. Now Bob Dylan would --The phone rings. He pulls off his headphones and picks it up but says nothing.	You must have known it would happen. You couldn't have been entirely unprepared. Like you said, I've been living with the guy. We were bound to get around to it sometime.
Fix it up. It'll make you feel better.	I'll bet you can't remember what you were doing here, can you? I mean, how much are you making now? Sixty? Seventy? And you were living in this shitty place.
I'll bet you can't remember what you were doing here, can you? I mean, how much are you making now? Sixty? Seventy? And you were living in this shitty place.	You know I didn't mind. And it's not as if Ray's place is any better.
You know I didn't mind. And it's not as if Ray's place is any better.	I'm sorry, but can we get this straight? What is his fucking name, Ian or Ray? What do you call him?
I'm sorry, but can we get this straight? What is his fucking name, Ian or Ray? What do you call him?	Ray. I hate Ian.

I'll be scarred for life.

No you won't.

I'll show you around when we've got this damn bed moved.

Is Julia here?

Upstairs. Treat her gently, huh? She hates moving.

Surprise.

Kirsty.

O.K. I'll be nice. You get on with the muscle work. I'll make myself some coffee.

Kitchen's through on your left.

What?

Just go. PLEASE. I'll be O.K. I'm going to go see Dad. He'll look after me --

What did I say?

Will you GO, damn you?

How can it be bullshit to state a preference?

Since when did this shop become a fascist regime?

Since you brought that bullshit tape in.

Great. That's the fun of working in a record store. Playing crappy pap you don't want to listen to. I thought this tape was going to be, you know, a conversation stimulator. I was going to ask you for your top five records to play on a Monday morning and all that, and you just had to ruin it.

We'll do it next Monday.

Well what's the point in that?

Nice, Barry.

Rob. Top five musical crimes perpetrated by Stevie Wonder in the '80's and '90's. Subquestion -- is it in fact unfair to criticize a formerly great artist for his latter- day sins? "Is it better to burn out than to fade away?"

You just drove a fucking customer away, Barry.

We didn't even really have it. I happen to know for a fact that the only Stevie Wonder single we have is "Don't Drive Drunk." I was just goofing on the straight, and it never cost you a penny.

Not the point.

Oh, so what's the point then?

I don't want you talking to our customers like that again.

"Our customers?" You think that Mr. L.L. Bean out there is going to be a regular?

Barry, I'm fucking broke! I know we used to fuck with anyone who asked for anything we didn't like, but it's gotta stop.

Bullshit. The guy was going to buy one record -- which we didn't even have -- and leave and never come back again anyway. Why not have a little fun? Big fucking deal.

What did he ever do to you?

He offended me with his terrible taste.

It wasn't even his terrible taste. It was his daughter's.

Oh, now you're defending that motherfucker? You're going soft in your old age, Rob. There was a time when you would have chased him out of the store and up the street. Now all of a sudden I'm offending your golf buddy. You're right, Rob. I am so sorry. How are we ever going to make enough money to get you and Laura into the country club?

We're only on the fucking list for Marie's gig at the Pulaski Pub, that's all! All three of us.

That's fucking great, Barry. We can spend fifteen bucks on a cab to save five each. Fantastic, Barry!

We can take your car.

It's not my car, now is it? It's Laura's car, and thus Laura has it. So it's an ass-bumping double- transferring bus ride through bumblefuck or a fat wad on a cab. Wow. Fucking great.

There's something different about the sound of her voice... And what did she mean last night, she hasn't slept with him yet. Yet. What does "yet" mean, anyway? "I haven't seen... Evil Dead II yet." What does that mean? It means you're going to go, doesn't it?

-- You're like a little squirrel of music, storing away dead little nuts of old garbage music, musical lint, old shit, shit, shit --

-- Barry, if I were to say to you I haven't seen Evil Dead II yet, what would that mean?

I'd think you were a cinematic idiot. And I'd feel sorry for you.

No, but would you think, from that one sentence. That I was going to see it?

I'm sorry, Rob, but I'm struggling here. I don't understand any part of this conversation. You're asking me what I would think if you told me that you hadn't seen a film that you've seen. What am I supposed to say?

Just listen to me. If I said to you --

"-- I haven't seen Evil Dead II yet," yeah, yeah, I hear you --

Would you... would you get the impression that I wanted to see it?

Well... you couldn't have been desperate to see it, otherwise you'd have already gone...

Why would they care?

Because it's a brilliant film. It's funny, violent, and the soundtrack kicks fucking ass.

Un-fucking-believable. Dick's out on a hot date, Rob's boning Marie LaSalle, and the best-looking and most intelligent of all of us isn't getting anything at all.

How do you know about that?

Oh come on, Rob. What am I, an idiot? I'm more bothered by Dick's thing. How did this happen, Dick? What rational explanation can there possibly be? What's her name?

Shut the fuck up, Barry.

Yeah, you would say that, wouldn't you? You two have to stick together now. Boners United. United in getting some.

Don't be sad, Barry. You'll find true love someday.

Suck my ass.

Terrific.

Isn't it?

That was one of the reasons they asked me to join originally, yes. But --

Great! That's fucking great! They only asked you to sing because of your name! You can stick it above the browser racks over there.

How many tickets can I put you down for?

None. Christ!

You're not even coming?

Of course I'm not coming. Do I look like I'd want to listen to some terrible experimental racket played in some hideous cave? Where is it? The fucking Bucktown Pub? Ha!

So much for friends, then. You're a bitter bastard, Rob, you know that?

Bitter? Because I'm not in Barrytown? You should be shot like a lame horse, you jerk. Just keep that out of my window.

Like fuck you are.

Laura said we could. If we helped out with the posters and stuff. And we did. And we are.

I'll give you 10% of the door if you don't play.

We're getting that anyway.

What is she doing? Okay, 20%.

No. We need the gig.

110%. That's my final offer. I'm not kidding. That's how much it means to me not to hear you play.

We're not as bad as you think, Rob.

You couldn't be. Look, Barry. There's going to be people from Laura's work there, people who own dogs and babies and Tina Turner albums. How are you going to cope with them?

We're not called Barrytown anymore, by the by. They got sick of the Barry/Barrytown thing. We're called SDM. Sonic Death Monkey.

Sonic Death Monkey.

What do you think? Dick likes it.

Barry, you're over thirty years old. You owe it to yourself and your friends and to your parents not to sing in a group called Sonic Death Monkey.

I owe it to myself to go right to the edge, Rob, and this group does exactly that. Over the edge, in fact.

You'll be going over the fucking edge if you come anywhere near me next Friday night.

That's what we want. Reaction. And if Laura's bourgeois lawyer friends can't take it, then fuck 'em. Let 'em riot, we can handle it. We'll be ready.

Why not?

Because it's sentimental tacky crap, that's why not. Do we look like the kind of store that sells "I Just Called To Say I Loved You?" Go to the mall and stop wasting our time.

What's your problem? What did I... Why are you --

Do you even know your daughter? There is no way she likes that song. Or is she in a coma?

Holy Shiite! What the fuck's this?

It's the new --

Okay, okay -- "Leader of the Pack." The guy fucking cracks up on a cycle and dies right? "Dead Man's Curve," Jan and Dean...

Did you know that after that song was recorded, Jan himself crashed his --

-- It was Dean, you fucking idiot.

Hey Charlie.

Hey Rob.

Why did you break up with me for Marco?

Fuck! I knew it! You're going through one of those what-does-it- all-mean things.

Huh?

There's been a rash of them, recently. I find it a little unnerving. In fact Marco called a few months back, and he wanted to see me, and rehash the past as they say, and I wasn't really up for it. Do all men go through this?

C'mon, just answer the question. You can say what you like. What the hell?

Good. So shall we leave it at that then?

I've already left it, you pathetic rebound fuck! Now get your patchouli stink out of my store.

I'm sorry. I haven't been very fair to you. That's why I came here to the store this evening. I feel terrible, Rob. This is really hard, you know.

Good. So. Is it my job?

What? Gimme a fucking break. Is that what you think? That your not big enough a deal for me? Jesus, gimme a little credit, Rob.

I don't know. It's one of the things I thought of.

What were the others?

Just the obvious stuff.

What's the obvious stuff?

I don't know.

Look. Maybe you'll grow up and we'll get it together, you and me. Maybe I'll never see either of you again. I don't know. All I know is that it's not a good time to be living here.

So, what, you haven't definitely decide to dump me? There's still a chance we'll get back together?

I don't know.

Well, if you don't know, there's a chance, right? It's like, if someone was in the hospital and he was seriously ill and the doctor said, I don't know if he's got a chance of survival or not, then that doesn't mean the patient's definitely going to die, now does it? It means he might live. Even if it's only a remote possibility.

I suppose so.

So we have a chance of getting back together again.

Oh, Rob, shut up.

Hey, I just want to know where I stand. What chance --

-- I don't fucking know what chance you fucking have!

You kind of have to start with Elvis Costello, but where? "Motel Matches?" "I Want You?" "I Hope You're Happy Now?" "Green Shirt?" His records should be sealed in cases that say "in case of vicious betrayal, smash glass." "Where Did You Sleep Last Night," sure, but by Robert Johnson or by Nirvana? Maybe a Liz Phair track. There are a couple to get angry at instead of being angry with. Some devil's advocate stuff. The Silver Jews could be good when you're ready to start putting it all behind you... But I think we're getting ahead of ourselves there. Ah. Dylan. Bob fucking Dylan. Now Bob Dylan would --The phone rings. He pulls off his headphones and picks it up but says nothing.

You must have known it would happen. You couldn't have been entirely unprepared. Like you said, I've been living with the guy. We were bound to get around to it sometime.

Fix it up. It'll make you feel better.

I'll bet you can't remember what you were doing here, can you? I mean, how much are you making now? Sixty? Seventy? And you were living in this shitty place.

You know I didn't mind. And it's not as if Ray's place is any better.

I'm sorry, but can we get this straight? What is his fucking name, Ian or Ray? What do you call him?

Ray. I hate Ian.