The first lull didn’t happen until two hours in… How are there still so many people? It has all felt like one giant blur. “You okay Claire?” Rae asks and she finishes putting some money away from the last customer. “Yes… just goodness, I really should have slept more last night.” “Okay, hey do you want me to go find some food? I think the panels started opening up so more people are going to be there.” “Panels?” “Umm, it’s like a presentation? Not that formal or anything. More like maybe they have a guest and they answer questions from the audience. Or they just talk.” “Oh yah, they got a bunch of VOs for this one, did you hear they got both Loid and Yor’s VOs? That’s going to be packed. ” Shiko chimes in, that bit of news causes Rae to perk up. “Oh wow really? Man if I wasn't so busy with school I might have made this one. That’s cool. But yah, panels could be like whatever, maybe a mangaka is there. Maybe they are showing off a new series, whatever gets people in the door I guess. There is probably a cosplay contest happening somewhere too.” Shiko nods. Rae then fidgets, I can see that she's trying to figure out how to excuse herself. “Umm, well anyways… I’m going to… go. You know, get some food. And stuff... Cya in a bit.” And there my awkward dolt slips out around the table to disappear down into the aisles of tables. I don’t have much time to think before a new customer shows up. Shiko ends up helping them too, but after we finalize their purchase it looks like we have a moment of breathing room. She shifts her chair closer to mine, and gives me a cheeky grin. “Sooo… how’d Rae score you. She’s not exactly smooth.” “Oh I disagree, she can be very smooth when she isn’t trying too hard. But she’s adorable either way.” “Yah, well you be nice to her, Kay?” The mirth drops from her voice. “Of course! Are you suggesting that I wouldn't?” “Cool, look you seem nice so far Francois-san, but like, I'm just looking out for my friend. She’s had it rough before.” “Oh, do you mean about your… well the awkward love square as she called it.” Shiko snorts, “That’s what she’s calling it? I suppose. Yah.” She leans back in her chair, letting it balance on its back legs. She seems to be rolling a thought in her head. “We made up… eventually. And thankful while we still could… but it was really bad for her for a while. She pretty much missed a month of school.” What ? “I didn’t… she never mentioned that .” “Of course she didn’t.” Shiko sighs, it's not judgemental. She just understands her. Of course she never told those bits. I sigh too, “It’s not surprising, she used to be so bad at being honest about her own pain.” I wish she had told me more. I knew she always made light of that moment, even from the first time she mentioned it… Even an idiot could see she wasn’t fine, and that was after years for her before. Now… “Used to? Last I checked she’s still doing it.” “I… yes, I just meant… I’m trying to help her in that way. She’s bad and telling me no, and I sometimes… I know she’s worried about being out as a lesbian.” “Yah… fucking Misaki… I can’t believe he did that to her. But fuck, we were all pretty stupid kids still.” She lets her chair fall back forward, and leans herself on her knees. “The whole school knew after that. And Rae pretty much lived in her room for that month. Even when she came back… she was struggling. Honestly it wasn’t till we graduated and went to a new highschool that things got better for her. Middle school was ruthless after Misaki outed her, they never let her forgot. At least she got to go back in the closet in a new highschool, and that helped. New friends also helped. Misha was, is a good friend, and she was always cool with us.” “Did you not also get… bullied?” “Me?... Sure I guess a bit? I don’t know… it wasn’t the same. It wasn’t a big deal for me. Like I didn’t care and she did? She was just figuring that out about herself, and then it blew up in her face. It’s good that she’s with you, I just don’t want it to go bad. I don’t want it to turn out that you are just messing around with her, she’s just your phase, and you’ll move on.” “Move on?” The edge in my voice catches her off guard and she turns to face me, “I’m. Not. Moving. On. She’s my everything, I couldn’t leave her if I tried. I will always be there for her!” Shiko is momentarily stunned. “Uhhh… okay… wow, you're really serious?” “Did I sound like I’m joking?” Calm down Claire. Shiko is just looking out for Rae. “No… sorry, that just really caught me off. You know what, I think I do like you. What do you like about her.” And with that Shiko’s grinning again and she leans back. “Oh goodness, do you want the shortened version? Well, superficially, she is very handsome, the way she fills out a suit and is completely oblivious to it, divine… She’s so cute and suave at the same time, it’s absolutely ridiculous. She’s so passionate about her hobbies, and so clever. I could just listen to her talk about anything honestly. She really tries hard at everything she puts her mind to. And it’s ridiculous how modest she is about herself now, she used to be confident and now she seems so unsure about so much, but she is still good at it. She should see how talented she is. And she is so devoted, goodness, the way she looks at me has never changed. I have no doubt in my mind that she loves me too when we look into each other's eyes. She’s amazing and she makes me feel amazing.” Shiko blinks slowly, “uhh… used to be confident?” Shite Divert, “You also liked Rae…?” That causes her to blush a little and her to pause. Perfect. “You still do?” She groans, “Look I know I have no chance with her, but yeah… she’s cute, I think I’ll always feel it a bit. She’s always going to be my friend though.” “So that’s it…?” It’s hard to not think of every other woman; or the occasional man , who also seemed intent on chasing Rae in our past life. Even when I firmly established she was mine . Shiko shrugs, “She’s not into me, not as anything more than a friend. I tried, a few times even. The first was probably a bad time… for many reasons.” She grimaces at herself. “But like, it’s not going to happen. And now that she's with you, that was never going to happen with me. Trust me. As long as you too are good, I’m happy with how things are.” “Are you?” I can’t help but ask, I remember how long Rae was an idiot . Shiko gives a light chuckle, “You’re good Claire-san. Don’t worry about me, seriously. I moved on, I just find her attractive still despite my better judgment..” I let myself chuckle, “We can be doomed to fall for quite questionable characters, no?” That gets Shiko to chuckle. “I do love her, immensely.” Shiko nods and hums in agreement, “Yah, it’s easy to see. Like you two seem to be moving fast, but like honestly, I don’t doubt you. And she’s bad at it saying it, but I’m pretty sure she is really into you too. You make her act weird. Weirder . And like by lesbian standards? I’m sure I know some who would have already moved together by now, Ha.” Oh it was blisteringly slow in our previous life, I had to wait nearly a year for her to kiss me after she basically proposed to me. “Thank you for being there for her, when she needed it. I wish I could have been there for her too.” Shiko looks a little shy after, and tries to wave it off. “It is what it is. Did you know she writes fan fiction?” Now Shiko’s diverting, she’s trying to grin through her embarrassment. “Yes, and she wont share it with me. It’s absolutely ridiculous.” It’s obscene . “Ooooh?” Shiko's grin turns genuine and her glasses catch an angle of light. “I could share her tumblr and fanfic accounts.” “Wait, really? I always wanted to read her writing.” Shiko chuckles, “Yah why not. If that doesn’t scare you off, nothing will.” “Oh don’t worry, that won’t. Ahh, how does this work? You said a tumblr ?” “Uh yah, a social media site, I’ll text you the links, let's share numbers, kay?” She fishes her phone out and holds it up to accept my number. I have to double check my number on my own phone, at least she doesn’t think it too odd that I do. “Awesome, I’ve always wanted to embarrass her when she finally did hook up with someone.” “Oh don’t tease her too hard, that’s my privilege .” We share grins. Oh this is delightful conspiratorial. “Oh don’t worry, that’s going to be real easy when you read her fic. It’s so unhinged, I love it.” “I…’ve had a notion.” “Really?” “Yes. We’ve talked a bit about it but she usually shies away from really getting into it.” Now. “But she’s not exactly the book of secrets she thinks she is, especially now. Wait, this is based off another work is it not? Would… should I read that first? Rae said her copies are with her parents, otherwise she would have lent those.” “Oh, you haven’t read Pray Love? You might get away with not… have you read any fan fiction before?” “No.” “Then… yah, maybe diving right into it would be… confusing. You can always get your own copy online and read it on your phone. There are online stores, you could even get a physical copy if you'd rather, it’s still in print I think.” “Oh, I could read it on either? I… yes that makes sense. I think I would rather get a copy in my hands, even if I do appreciate reading on my phone. Rae showed me how to read Dungeon Meshi on it, and that has been quite excellent so far.” “Hell yah, Kui-sensei is such a goat.” Goat? “That’s a great one to start with if you haven’t read much manga.” It sounds like she approves of the choice. “I haven’t, it is my first, but I have been really enjoying it. I ended up reading it far too late last night.” Shiko raises her hand, oh it’s for a high five, with a laugh I do my half of the motion. A customer shows up after that and that puts our conversation on hold for now as Shiko’s attention turns back to her work. She seems very relaxed and casual as she helps them, but is still quite diligent. She’s practiced at this work. The customer leaves quite satisfied and soon after Rae returns, carrying a fair amount of food that reminds me of what one could find at a fair. The smell causes my stomach to rumble nearly immediately. “Hey, hope Shiko wasn’t too weird.” Rae says, just a little nervous as she makes her way to the table. “Don't worry, I only shared your deepest darkest secrets.” Rae narrows her eyes, Shiko just laughs at her. “We just talked, relax Rae, your girlfriend is nice, I approve.” Rae digests that news for a moment and then does actually relax, “Oh.. well good. Claire-chan I hope you don’t mind some greasy food.” “You can drop the honorifics with your girlfriend Rae,” Shiko teases. “That sounds lovely Rae, thank you very much.” I offer to avoid Rae from having to feel too self conscious. Chan is an improvement over sama afterall, so I consider it a victory already. And she really only uses it in public too, another improvement. Rae finally slips back in behind the table with us, and starts passing out some food and drinks. It’s fried food, and it is just perfect for the moment. This will tide us over until we can have a more proper lunch later. Rae covers for Shiko and I and we quickly devour the food before returning to the task at hand. And just in time as it seems a new surge of people start to flood the venue floor. It’s not quite as busy as the first wave, and it gives me more time to make proper observations. True to Shiko prior predictions, her stock of booklets, doujin , are diminishing. Have we already sold half of her wares? Also the people moving about are very interesting; we are frequented by many women mostly, but we do get a fair amount of men. Some are a bit… off putting, to say so politely. Shiko treats them as respectfully as possible. Thankful nothing becomes too unbearable, but otherwise most of them seem fine. All the women are lovely though, and so diverse. There is a fair amount in cosplay, but even those not in cosplay have such diverse appearance, and Rae starts pointing out the little things. All the symbols, the little flags and what means what. I never realized how prolific such things were here. Rae always had a little rainbow flag on her desk back home, but now is the first time I can really feel the connection with a greater community that it meant to her. I find myself wanting to also add a bit of that to my life. The hours start to move quickly and soon Shiko is shooing us out, to take a break, get some food again and finally explore a bit. “Make sure you show your girl a good time Oohashi.” She teases as we leave, smiling like a Cheshire cat. There is something very nostalgic about wandering about the floor with Rae. It feels so much like our first outing at the school fair, only this time I’m the one finding every opportunity to cling to her. She is nervous, but I think the mask and hoodie are doing a lot to help her feel more comfortable. We weave our way through the other amateur mangaka on the floor next to Shiko. Rae manages to pick out a few that catch her interest, and after some prompting concedes that I could read them as well. I do catch her trying to hide a few from my notice though. I have to push down the urge to tease her for it, it already feels like I have pushed too much in the morning. I’m sure I’ll get a chance to see them later. I must remember to be patient with her. Soon we arrive in the artist corner as Rae dubs it and the people here are selling prints of artwork, large prints as well. As Rae explains it, much like books it’s easy to reproduce printed art. Much in the same way that we can share pictures across our phone, these images are easily printed to paper. And all the artists are able to work with a computer to produce this art. It’s amazing how much work is being shown off, and the styles of the art are all so diverse. So much of art in Bauer was focused on realism, but here it reaches all corners. For every bright and vibrant piece, there is something dark and moody. Some look nearly like photos, some look styled in the same way as Persona, or Dungeon Meshi, and others are uniquely surreal. The passion of the community is beautiful and I even manage to find pieces I recognize from Persona and Dungeon Meshi. After some encouragement from Rae I decided to find a print. After some browsing I picked out a lovely… If somewhat provocative; only slightly so , piece of Marcille and Falin after her dragon transformation. The piece is haunting yet beautiful in a way I can’t describe. There is also the added bonus of Rae being absolutely ‘losing her mind’ over the choice. I also found a lovely print of the phantom thieves to add. These will be nice to hang up, I think. After that we find ourselves with merchants; well stores, as Rae refers to them. More professional collections of merchandise. Some are selling video games, Rae is currently trapped looking at a collection beneath a glass counter. She mumbles something about having to look to see if she can find a retro title. I take the chance to look about freely. There is a wide collection on display in the small area, incredibly packed and busy. A treat of the eyes. Little figurines and models of many characters, and books, many, many books. Do… they have Dungeon Meshi? Of course they do, I glance around, and see Rae is still trapped scanning through the collection. I could have my own copies… oh goodness there are fourteen volumes all together? Where was I exactly… Oh goodness. Checking my phone, I was already into volume six. There is still so much more to read. That’s exciting . I should just purchase them for myself. It’s a little awkward as I pluck all the books for the shelf, they certainly have many copies available. Hopefully they can provide a bag. It will be terribly awkward to have to carry these all back home later, or even now. The man at the counter gives me a smile, he looks just barely older than myself. “Hi, you find everything you were looking for?” “Ooh, actually I didn’t see it but would happen to have the book Pray Love as well?” The man seems to run down a mental checklist in his mind, “Oh, Between Prayer and Love? That’s the girl love light novel right? I think we might have some in the back. That’s an older one. Let me check real quick. You can put your stuff on the counter.” “Of course, thank you.” With that he disappears behind a curtain so I’m left to let my vision wander. Rae is still in the same spot, I think she must be double checking… I expect she had little luck initially. There are more shelves behind the counter, full of cases. I think Rae mentioned those held an object to either watch videos or play video games. As I place the books down on the counter I notice there is more goods below the glass top. Oh, is that jewelry? I hadn’t expected to… Wait, these are styled after Persona?! They are, that’s the Phantom Thief mask! Their brand, a top hat sitting on top an eye mask, flames licking out the side and colored in red and black. I hazard one more look at Rae, it looks like she's still busy. I could also… I could? Couldn’t I? It looks lovely, and Rae really does love the game. It would be like when she bought me the amulet wouldn't it? Oh I could… Oh, I’m feeling a bit too emotional over the idea already. Would she even think that much of it? She’s never been much for such things in the past but this feels different. This feels right . I have to. “Hi, so we have a few, but it’s only the first, second, fifth and seventh book. If you want, you could come to our main store in Shinjuku and we could order the rest for you.” I was so caught up in the thought that the man surprised me with his return. “Oh I see, I’ll consider it but I think just the first two books are enough for now, Thank you very much.” “No problem, okay, are you ready to check out then?” “Oh more thing, you have this pendant here, this is from Persona Five is it not?” “Hmmm, oh yah, that’s the official limited edition one, did you also want that as well? It’s fifty-five thousand yen.” That is a lot, isn’t it? That’s many meals… It’s not as if though I am a commoner anymore… or whatever equivalent it would be here… middle class? True, Catherine did say I could pay large sums to my credit card if needed. I could try. It's a special occasion. “Yes, that will do. If I could get all of this, that would be wonderful, thank you again.” The man gives me a polite nod and opens the back of the counter and pulls the pendant from the display with a case. He closes the case, pulls a box up, also with a Persona design on it to store the pendant and collects the books over at a cashier. The card makes no objection when I use it to pay for everything. Excellent . I’ll be more frugal going forward, this is being charged to Mother after all. And I did use it last week to buy clothes for Rae as well. I should probably talk to her about it next time we have a chance. Hopefully I don’t have to justify this to her later. I will though if I have to. Rae is worth it. I collect my bag and prizes and move to Rae, she’s still trying to find her prize. “No luck?” She sighs… “No… I mean it’s not surprising… it’s kinda hard to find and old. I was just hoping it might be… oh well. Oh did you get something?” I give the bag a shake, and pull out one of the volumes of Dungeon Meshi and grin. “Noooo, oh god I’m so jelly!” I can feel the smile spread across my cheeks. “ Oh ? How jelly?” I adore when her silly vernacular slips out. “Oh these look so good.” I let her take the book from hand and she starts flipping through it, “Real Jelly. It was always hard to justify buying them, and the more that came out… it just meant paying more to get everything, I figure eventually when I was working… wait did you get everything?” “Yes, I was already up to volume six, and I couldn’t imagine stopping now. I would be very happy to read them with you, or even lend to you once I finish my own reading.” “Oh god please, I would love to read the hard copy. Did you get anything else?” “It’s a secret.” You’ll see it soon enough. “Oh… really?” She sounds a little suspicious. Always so perceptive. “Yes, I’ll let you know later.” ‘Oh, well okay.” “What were you looking for, by the way. Those were video games?” “Oh yah,” She waves down to the glass case, it’s like the one that had the pendant, except there looks to be hundreds of very little rectangular objects. “These are cartridges for the DS, they slot into a small device about the size of your phone, and you can play the game on it. It’s older, I was still a kid when it came out, but I kinda got into it in highschool… I wanted to find a copy of Pokemon white.” Her eyes trail back to the counter. “Pokemon?” That name sounds oddly familiar… “It’s a game, I thought we… ah it’s not important, we are busy enough as it is. So you happy? Did you want to check out anything else or should we go get some food finally?” “I think food would be good now, I think it’s been nearly forty minutes now. We shouldn't make Shiko-san wait too long.” “It has, hasn’t it? Yah let's wrap up.” Rae pushes herself away for the counter “There's a cafeteria of sorts set up around the corner. Let's go grab our lunch and then head back.” Today really has been lovely so far. Spending the day with Rae, the glimpse into an aspect she was alway passionate about but I never could be a part of before. And now I can make the day end perfectly. The pendant stashed away safely in my bag, I can’t wait till we have a chance to be alone and I can give it to her. That I can let her know how much I love her again. That I love her, all of this, all of her. It’s perfect.