text: Luckily I found a gay friend who basically saved me from wanting to kill myself half the time. Apparently, everyone in high school already knew he was gay, they just didnt bother to tell me or I just didnt bother to notice you know, until he decided to make a pass at me one night. And I just flatly told him that I wasnt gay but Id still be his friend
  After that I started to realize that people were looking at me even more peculiarly then usual. And then I started getting- I started to get harassed by people and especially in gym class. They felt threatened because they were naked and I was supposedly gay. So they either better cover up their penises, or punch me. Or both
  But then after that I started to be proud of the fact that I was gay even though I wasnt. I really enjoyed the conflict. Pretty exiting. Because I almost found my identity. I was a special geek you know? Wasnt quite the punk rocker I was looking for but at least it was better than being the average geek