rqchao/spongebob · Datasets at Hugging Face

Non-SpongeBob Dialogue stringlengths 1 11.1k	SpongeBob Response stringlengths 1 2.74k
Gary: Meooooooow.	I accept your apology, Gary. Now, you be good to him. Good night. Ahh. I can rest so peacefully, now that Gary's got a good pal they could play with.
Gary: Meow!	Gary! Shame on you! Puffy Fluffy is perfectly harmless. See? There he is, fast asleep. Now will you let me sleep, Gary, please? Good night.
Gary: Meow! Puffy Fluffy Monster: Rawr! Gary: Meow! Gary: Mah!	Mmmmm. You're making meatballs, Grandma? Time for dinner already?
Gary: Phew. Meow! Gary: Oooow! Mah! Gary: Mah!	Better go check and see how my little buddies are getting along! Hmm, that's interesting. Must have been a sea quake last night. Oh, well, what are you gonna do? That's unusual. Whoa! My library! And my prized memoirs of T.S. Halibut! My clothes! This was no random sea quake. Who could have done this? There was no one here except for... ...Gary. I bet he's jealous about the new friend. Gary! You are in big trouble, mister! Gary, Gary, unlock this door immediately. Gary, Gary, did you hear? Gary? All right, Gary, you have left me no choice! Gary! You put Fluffy down right now! Bad boy, Gary! Bad! Bad! Bad boy! Bad! Bad Gary! Bad! I have told and told you and told you and told you and told you and... Oh, hello. Are you a friend of Fluffy? What's goin' on? Okay, now this is starting to hurt.
Gary: MEOW!	This is exactly what I was talking about-- Fluffy! Fluffy, wait! Well, Gary, what do you have to say for yourself? Ah, this is more like it. From now on, I'm taking you wherever I go. No more lonely days alone at home.
Mr. Krabs: What's that filthy animal doing in me kitchen?	It's me, SpongeBob. I brought Gary along to help out.
Mr. Krabs: Free... labor? Why didn't ya say so? Serve ‘em up, snail! French Narrator: Well, well, what is this? Ah, the artist at sea. Let us watch and see the fruits of his struggle. Ah, it seems that inspiration has struck. Artist: Hmm... ah! Artist: My pencil! What? No, no! French Narrator: The artist has learned the first lesson of the sea: Always bring a spare pencil. Artist: Noooooo!	Okay. Ready, Patrick? One...
Patrick: Two... Both: Three!	Scissors beats paper, Patrick! One...
Both: two...	Three! Patrick, how come you always do paper?
Patrick: What is that thing, SpongeBob?	It looks like a giant pencil!
Patrick: Go touch it!	It is a giant pencil, Patrick! Let's draw some giant pictures with it.
Patrick: Whatcha drawin'?	Stand back, Patrick. I can't draw with you breathing down my neck.
Patrick: Psshh, artists.	It's a jellyfish.
Patrick: Pretty good, SpongeBob, but it's lacking basic construction, and your perspective leaves a lot to be desired.	Eh, everybody's a critic.
Patrick: SpongeBob, your drawing's coming to life!	Now that's more like it, Mr. Critic.
Patrick: No, I mean it's swimming away!	Do you know what this means, Patrick?
Patrick: Your art can never hang in a museum.	It means we found a magic pencil!
Patrick: Now all I need is a magic mustache and all my dreams will have come true.	Coming right up!
Patrick: Life is good! Easy come, easy go... Squidward: Squidward, if you had some hair, you'd be the most gorgeous creature in the sea. You've got looks, talent, all you need is a full head of... HAIR! Patrick: My turn!	Be careful, Patrick! Being an artist is a heavy responsibility. Each work of art is like a child and must be treated as such.
Patrick: Come on! I was just gonna draw a cartoon.	Okay! Why didn't you say so? Hey! Another jellyfish!
Patrick: It's Squidward, silly!	It's kind of creepy looking when it moves.
Patrick: You're right, SpongeBob.	We can't let it go into town!
Patrick: Poor Squidward.	Hey! My brain just hatched an idea. This is gonna be classic!
Squidward: I think I fancy a stroll around the park.	Oh, Squidward!
Squidward: What do you want? Hello, what's this? Someone left me money for a perm. Come to Hairy! Ow! SpongeBob! Oh, my hair! SpongeBob!	Wait! I've got another idea! This'll be the ultimate prank. I'll draw me, and when Squidward answers the door... it won't be me! Aww, look at him. Ain't he a doll? All he needs is a tie. Ready for action!
Patrick: He's going to the door.	He's knockin' on the door. Squidward's answering the door... aaaaand...
Squidward: OOH! OWW, OWW, OW! Patrick: He's beating up Squidward! Ha! Ha! Ha!	DoodleBoy, stop!
Patrick: He's got the pencil.	What have I done? We've got to find him! Where could he possibly be?
Patrick: Maybe he's in that poorly drawn pineapple.	Come on, let's go!
Patrick: I'm not going in there	Come on, Patrick. I'm right behind you. Baby steps. Almost there...
Patrick: What just happened? DoodleBob: Meahoy, memoyay? Meyoyyoy, ladyonmamoy!	Come on, Patrick. Give me a boost up!
Patrick: Can't we just stay down here where it's safe?	No way. I created this monster and I've got to stop him.
DoodleBob: Neofineyin!	See what I mean, Patrick?
Patrick: WHERE'S THE LEAK, MA'AM? Yurrgh!	You okay, Patrick?
Patrick: FINLAND! DoodleBob: Meyaiovah! Mee hoy minoy! Meah froyay!	There he is.
Patrick: He's hideous. He makes me sick, just looking at him. Those big bulgy eyes, that square body, those two buck teeth, and that stupid tie!	Uh... ahem.
Patrick: Oh... but it looks good on you, SpongeBob. Heh heh!	He's putting down the pencil. This is our chance. On the count of three, we'll jump out and surprise him.
Patrick: Ooh, boy, a surprise party! Is it his birthday? DoodleBob: Bawahh bwah bwah wahh!	Patrick!! Patrick! Do something!
Patrick: Happy Birthday! Patrick: Here's your present. You're welcome. DoodleBob: Dewaaagheaugaaagh!	Hold it right there, Doodle! I brought you into this world and now I'm gonna take you out. Any last words?
DoodleBob: EEDAHFAAWAHOBABOBBA!	I'm sorry, what was that?
DoodleBob: Ee...DAh...Faawa...HobaBobba...	Hold still, Doodle. This is for your own good. Take that and this and this and that and this that this that...! I AM SPONGEBOB, DESTROYER OF EVIL!
Patrick: Take it easy. It's just a drawing.	Well, that takes care of that, eh, Patrick?
Patrick: Done and done.	Gee, Gary, you should have been there! It sure was exciting, but you know, I kind of miss the little doodle. He was like a son to me. But I'm sure glad things are back to normal. Well, good night, sweet prince.
Gary: Meeeoowww.	Good night, magic pencil. Oh, hey, Magic Pencil. What are you doing up? Drawing yourself a glass of water? AAAAH! DOODLEBOB! Heh heh, no hard feelings, right? What do you think you're doing, doodle?!
DoodleBob: You Doodle! Me SpongeBob! Huh?	Be careful with that thing! Who knows what will happen? I nose. Very funny, doodle. Now it's my turn. Well, Doodle, it looks like this is a draw. You've made your point, no matter, I was voted most artistic in high school.
Squidward: Ow! SpongeBob, you're gonna pay for that!	Or maybe it was most clumsy. Huh? Paper! Page for Mr. Doodle!
Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob, what's with all the ruckus?	Take a look for yourself, Patrick.
Patrick: It's the evil Doodle!	No, no, not evil. He was just a two-dimensional creature lost in our three-dimensional aquatic world longing for a purpose.
Patrick: So... he's a drawing?	Exactly! See how happy he is?
Patrick: He still looks kind of creepy.	Oh, great Magic Pencil, your powers are too mighty for us ocean dwellers. So I will send you back to the magic kingdom from where you came. Are you ready, Patrick?
Squidward: Can you two be quiet?! Squidward: Didn't think so. What are you barnacle heads doing, anyway?	Patrick and I are practicing our favorite noises. Mine is a dolphin, laughing.
Patrick: And my favorite is the plaintiff song of the blue whale. Ahem. Whale Businessman: Huh? Did you hear that? Fish Businessman: What's wrong, Frank? Frank: That song. It sounds just like Martha! Fish Businessman: Frank, how many times do I have to tell you? Martha's no good for you! She's just no good! Squidward: Why would you want to practice such horrible sounds?	It's one of the activities in our favorite magazine. Simple-Ton: A ton of simple things to do!
Squidward: It must very challenging for you!	Oh, it is.
Patrick: Yeah, and it made me look more smart-like. What does the magazine say we should do next?	Well, let's take a look. I think we've done everything in this issue. Oh, except for this one! The Best Friend Quiz! Do you really know your best friend? Oh, this should be easy. Patrick and I know everything about each other!
Squidward: Well, you two have fun with your mutual ignominious society. SpongeBob & Patrick: Bye, Squidward! Squidward: Morons. SpongeBob & Patrick: Bye, again!	You go first, Patrick.
Patrick: Oh, no. After you, old buddy.	Au contraire. After you, mon amie.
Patrick: Please. After you, pal.	No, no, no, no, no. After you, bestest friend- -Oof!
Squidward: Just pick one! And there's another three where that came from!	I'll go first. Question 1: What is your best friend's favorite color? Hmmm.... I'm thinking........Aquamarine!
Patrick: I hate to burst your bubble, but my favorite color is........ it is aquamarine. Sorry I doubted you.	No problem. Is your best friend right, or left-handed? The answer is right-handed.
Patrick: How did you know?	Simple, Patrick! It's because you're my best friend!
Patrick: Aww!	Is your best friend's belly button have an innie or an outie?
Patrick: No peeking!	No need to peek, Patrick. I can do this with my eyes closed! You haaaaaaaaaave...
Patrick: Oh! What will his answer be? Squidward: The suspense is killing me!	...an innie!
Patrick: Well, let's just check that theory! Innie! Wow! How does he do it? Squidward: Magic. Patrick: My turn! But, give me some hard questions. Not like those softballs you answered.	Okay! First question: What is your best friend's favorite color?
Patrick: No, no! No hints! Blue! No, clear! No! That's not it. Hold on, hold on. 14.	The answer is...beige.
Patrick: Oh, barnacles! Oh, I was so close.	Question 2: Is your best friend left-handed or right-handed?
Patrick: Oh, tricky, tricky. Hmm, right, or, left? Right-handed!	Sorry, Patrick, I'm ambidextrous!
Patrick: Oh, fish paste!	Next question: Does your best friend have an innie, or an outie belly button?
Patrick: Belly button, huh? Hmm. An innie!	Sorry, Patrick. I have an outie.
Patrick: Tartar sauce!	Well, I'm sure you'll get the next one right! What is your best friend's favorite food?
Patrick: Oh! Oh! I remember! Your favorite food is a chum burger!	No.
Patrick: I thought for sure I had that one.	Okay, let's try an easy one. Is your best friend a boy or a girl?
Patrick: Ooh. That's a toughie. Hmm. Rugged biceps. Yet, delicate eyelashes. Pass!	Uh, last question!
Patrick: Ooh! This is for the win!	What shape is your best friend?
Patrick: Oh! I got this one! Um, uh, can you repeat the question?	What shape is your best friend, SpongeBob SQUAREPANTS?
Patrick: Round, flat, uh, hexagon.	SQUARE-pants.
Patrick: Ooh! It's right on the tip of my tongue!	Five seconds.
Patrick: Um, um, oh, jeez, trapezoid, pentagon, mormorphis...	Time's up!
Patrick: Triangle!	Uh, no.
Squidward: Idiots, wrecking my boat. Squidward: So, who won your stupid quiz? Patrick: It was a tie.	Well it wasn’t a tie, but we had lots of fun.
Squidward: Let me see that. a triangle?! Patrick didn't know anything about you! And he's supposed to be your best friend? Patrick: I know, it's like we're not friends at all!	Now, now. Patrick may not have passed the quiz, but like a true best friend, he's always here for me. Right, Patrick? Patrick?
Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob! I got you an ice cream.	Thank you, best friend, Patrick.
Patrick: It's your favorite! Dill Pickle Swirl with mustard and extra bacon bits!	Patrick, this is your favorite ice cream. My favorite is, plain vanilla.
Patrick: Oh, oh right. Well, more ice cream for me! Patrick: Oh, can I borrow five bucks?	Here! Take your dirty, rotten money! Ahhah! I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU ANYMORE!
Ice Cream Man: Hey, what's with him? Patrick: I guess he didn't want any ice cream. Gary: Meow-row. Meow-row-row...	It just isn't fair! Oh, who needs Patrick anyway? Rest of my life, here I come!
Patrick: Oh, hey there, SpongeBob!	Be strong, be strong, be strong, be strong! Good afternoon, Mr. Star.
Patrick: See you later!	Oh, Sandy! It was awful! Truly awful! We were like complete strangers!
Sandy: You don't need to know everything about your best friend. That's what keeps the friendship interesting!	Really?
Sandy: Maybe you and Patrick just need some time apart.	Yeah! I'll have lots of fun without Patrick!
Sandy: What a crybaby.	I don't need Patrick! I can have a good time all by myself! I can go jellyfishing! Patrick and I used to go jellyfishing...I can play leapfrog! I can blow bubbles! Uh, maybe not.
Patrick: Leedle leedle leedle lee!	Oh, it's Patrick! I can't let him see me!
Patrick: Leedle leedle lee!	Well, he doesn't seem to be missing me at all.
Patrick: Leedle leedle lee!	Nice that he's gotten over our friendship so quickly! Patrick works out at the gym? And he's hanging out with Larry the Lobster? Maybe I don't know much about Patrick, either. Patrick's shopping for cookery? Very suspicious. Oh! He's coming back! Hold it right there, Patrick!
Larry the Lobster: Hi, SpongeBob. Patrick: We were just coming to see you.	Oh, I'll bet you were... to tell me about your new best friend, Larry, I suppose?!
Larry: Whoa, settle down, little dude. I don't want to get in the middle of, whatever this is. Patrick: Well Larry is a great guy, loads of talent, and good looks.	I know, he is pretty amazing...
Patrick: He's not my best friend. He was just helping me buy a present.	Who for? Sandy?
Patrick: No. For my REAL best friend, SpongeBob SquarePants.	Really? For me? What is it? Oh! I love it! You DO know me, best friend!
Patrick: I got a pair for me too!	Oh, you're the bestest, best friend Patrick! How do I look?
Patrick: How should I know, mysterious stranger?! Plankton: Oh, come on, Karen, please! Karen: Well, if you must know... Plankton: There's nothing wrong with Chum Bucket fare. Why, look! Here's a fresh batch of a delicious new chum sauce. It's called Spicy Chum Surprise. Delectable! Karen: Oh, I'm sure it'll be a huge success! Plankton: Sorry, no time for your senseless chatter. I've got a customer to attend to! Billy: Okay, so what about the Krabby Kola? Plankton: We don't serve Krabby Kola, we carry Bucket Bubbler and Chum Cherry Blast. Billy: Okay, well then, can I just make sure I get those Krabby Fries with extra Krabby Sauce? Plankton: Ugh! How many times must I say it?! We don't carry Krabby Fries, we don't carry Krabby Kola, we don't carry Krabby Sauce, and we don't carry Krabby Patties! So, if you want any of those things, you're gonna have to go to the Krusty Krab, which is located directly across the street! Billy: Okay, thanks for the directions. Plankton: Any time. What is wrong with people?! Honestly, I don't think anyone in Bikini Bottom would know a decent meal if it looked them right in the eye and said, Hello! I'm a decent meal, wonderful to meet you! Please pay money for me and then put me in your mouth so your old pal Plankton doesn't lose everything he's spent his entire life working for! Karen: Yeah, and if anyone ever did order one of your meals, it probably would look them in the eye. Plankton: You know, Karen, sometimes I wonder if you're here to help me run the Chum Bucket or just to make me feel like I'm two inches tall. Karen: Maybe in heels. If it wasn't for me, you probably wouldn't even remember to blink! Plankton: Oh, come on! When we first met, you were little more than a jumbled mass of diodes and wires. I made you what you are today! Literally! So don't think you couldn't be replaced in a heartbeat! Ow! Karen: What's the matter? Plankton: My eye is burning and I don't know why! Karen: Blink. Plankton: Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me. Now where was I!? Karen: You were threatening to replace me. Plankton: Oh yeah! I don't need you! I can make a whole army of computers that might actually help me steal the formula! Karen: Oh, puh-leeze. Plankton: I'll show you woman! Plankton: Oh, Karen! Karen: Now what!? Plankton: Could you come here for a moment? Karen: What do you want? Plankton: Feast your, uh, screen on this. Karen: That’s my replacement!? It’s a toaster! Plankton: Ha ha ha, that, my dear, is a T-119A Compumatic, the finest of its kind. T-119A Compumatic: Good morning, sir. Plankton: Good morning, T-119A! Plankton: They're supposed to do that. Next, behold! The Noxious Enterprises Super SPU-31 Liquid-Cooled Mobile Processing Unit, a mind staggering combination of both power! And refinement. Karen: That'll help you get the formula. Plankton: And now, Karen, the piece de resistance. Have you ever witnessed such marvelous machinery? Karen: It sorta just looks like an old hair dryer taped to the back of a miniature windmill. Plankton: I can see how someone of your level of technical knowledge would think that, Karen, but in actuality what you are looking at is... oh, right. Karen: I don't recall you ever having reason to own a hair dryer, Plankton. Plankton: Okay, here we go! Are you going to make me get the picture down again!? Karen: What picture!? Plankton: You see! Plenty of reason to be using a hair dryer. Karen: Why are we even talking about this? Plankton: Because you were the one that said— Karen: What's going on!? Plankton: Dear Neptune! Plankton: Karen, do something! Quick! They're tearing each other apart! Just press a button or something! Plankton: Not that one! Karen: Well, it's good to see that that strategy didn't fall flat! Plankton: You know, Karen, with you around, I'm beginning to wonder how I'm still alive. Karen: Ohhh, so it's my fault is it? Plankton: That's right! Now it's all clear! It's you that's been holding me back! In fact, if it weren't for your constant stifling, I'd have the whole world running for the safety of their mommies! Karen: You and your crack team of robots, huh? Plankton: Well maybe I could iron out a few bugs, but then you'll see just how much I need you! Karen? What's this? It's words on paper. It says: Dear Plankton, I've logged onto another network. I just can't go into sleep mode at night knowing that you'll continue blaming me for all of your failures. Anyway, you're a grown single celled organism, and allowed to make your own syntax errors. Nice knowing you, Karen. Dah! who needs her!? Not me! I'm going to steal that Krabby Patty formula from Mr. Krabs once and for all. And then we'll see who's made the error. Ow! P.S., don't forget to blink. Oh yeah. Plankton: Okay, team, listen up. We're on our own now so we don't have anything holding us back. Now I know you all look upon me kindly since I am your creator, but the last thing the Chum Bucket needs is, if we're going to be victorious, is a bunch of soft, uh, software. Does everybody understand? Plankton: I said, does everybody understand!? Plankton: All right, then let's do this! T-119A to position! SPU-31 to position! Command Module to position! Plankton: Heh heh heh. Now let's see Krabs stop this. I'll show him. I'll show them all! Perch Perkins: This just in, a diabolical albeit haphazardly thrown-together machine is attacking Bikini Bottom and is headed straight for the Krusty Krab! Squidward: Why is the local news always such rubbish!?	Hey, Squidward, look! I figured out how to get my mop wet without dipping it in the bucket.
Squidward: SpongeBob, nobody cares about... Plankton: Hey! Krabs, I wanna see you. Mr. Krabs: Okay, boy, get out there.	Um... hello... what do you want robot thing, sir? Oh, hey Plankton! What are you doing here?

Gary: Meooooooow.

I accept your apology, Gary. Now, you be good to him. Good night. Ahh. I can rest so peacefully, now that Gary's got a good pal they could play with.

Gary: Meow!

Gary! Shame on you! Puffy Fluffy is perfectly harmless. See? There he is, fast asleep. Now will you let me sleep, Gary, please? Good night.

Gary: Meow! Puffy Fluffy Monster: Rawr! Gary: Meow! Gary: Mah!

Mmmmm. You're making meatballs, Grandma? Time for dinner already?

Gary: Phew. Meow! Gary: Oooow! Mah! Gary: Mah!

Better go check and see how my little buddies are getting along! Hmm, that's interesting. Must have been a sea quake last night. Oh, well, what are you gonna do? That's unusual. Whoa! My library! And my prized memoirs of T.S. Halibut! My clothes! This was no random sea quake. Who could have done this? There was no one here except for... ...Gary. I bet he's jealous about the new friend. Gary! You are in big trouble, mister! Gary, Gary, unlock this door immediately. Gary, Gary, did you hear? Gary? All right, Gary, you have left me no choice! Gary! You put Fluffy down right now! Bad boy, Gary! Bad! Bad! Bad boy! Bad! Bad Gary! Bad! I have told and told you and told you and told you and told you and... Oh, hello. Are you a friend of Fluffy? What's goin' on? Okay, now this is starting to hurt.

Gary: MEOW!

This is exactly what I was talking about-- Fluffy! Fluffy, wait! Well, Gary, what do you have to say for yourself? Ah, this is more like it. From now on, I'm taking you wherever I go. No more lonely days alone at home.

Mr. Krabs: What's that filthy animal doing in me kitchen?

It's me, SpongeBob. I brought Gary along to help out.

Mr. Krabs: Free... labor? Why didn't ya say so? Serve ‘em up, snail! French Narrator: Well, well, what is this? Ah, the artist at sea. Let us watch and see the fruits of his struggle. Ah, it seems that inspiration has struck. Artist: Hmm... ah! Artist: My pencil! What? No, no! French Narrator: The artist has learned the first lesson of the sea: Always bring a spare pencil. Artist: Noooooo!

Okay. Ready, Patrick? One...

Patrick: Two... Both: Three!

Scissors beats paper, Patrick! One...

Both: two...

Three! Patrick, how come you always do paper?

Patrick: What is that thing, SpongeBob?

It looks like a giant pencil!

Patrick: Go touch it!

It is a giant pencil, Patrick! Let's draw some giant pictures with it.

Patrick: Whatcha drawin'?

Stand back, Patrick. I can't draw with you breathing down my neck.

Patrick: Psshh, artists.

It's a jellyfish.

Patrick: Pretty good, SpongeBob, but it's lacking basic construction, and your perspective leaves a lot to be desired.

Eh, everybody's a critic.

Patrick: SpongeBob, your drawing's coming to life!

Now that's more like it, Mr. Critic.

Patrick: No, I mean it's swimming away!

Do you know what this means, Patrick?

Patrick: Your art can never hang in a museum.

It means we found a magic pencil!

Patrick: Now all I need is a magic mustache and all my dreams will have come true.

Coming right up!

Patrick: Life is good! Easy come, easy go... Squidward: Squidward, if you had some hair, you'd be the most gorgeous creature in the sea. You've got looks, talent, all you need is a full head of... HAIR! Patrick: My turn!

Be careful, Patrick! Being an artist is a heavy responsibility. Each work of art is like a child and must be treated as such.

Patrick: Come on! I was just gonna draw a cartoon.

Okay! Why didn't you say so? Hey! Another jellyfish!

Patrick: It's Squidward, silly!

It's kind of creepy looking when it moves.

Patrick: You're right, SpongeBob.

We can't let it go into town!

Patrick: Poor Squidward.

Hey! My brain just hatched an idea. This is gonna be classic!

Squidward: I think I fancy a stroll around the park.

Oh, Squidward!

Squidward: What do you want? Hello, what's this? Someone left me money for a perm. Come to Hairy! Ow! SpongeBob! Oh, my hair! SpongeBob!

Wait! I've got another idea! This'll be the ultimate prank. I'll draw me, and when Squidward answers the door... it won't be me! Aww, look at him. Ain't he a doll? All he needs is a tie. Ready for action!

Patrick: He's going to the door.

He's knockin' on the door. Squidward's answering the door... aaaaand...

Squidward: OOH! OWW, OWW, OW! Patrick: He's beating up Squidward! Ha! Ha! Ha!

DoodleBoy, stop!

Patrick: He's got the pencil.

What have I done? We've got to find him! Where could he possibly be?

Patrick: Maybe he's in that poorly drawn pineapple.

Come on, let's go!

Patrick: I'm not going in there

Come on, Patrick. I'm right behind you. Baby steps. Almost there...

Patrick: What just happened? DoodleBob: Meahoy, memoyay? Meyoyyoy, ladyonmamoy!

Come on, Patrick. Give me a boost up!

Patrick: Can't we just stay down here where it's safe?

No way. I created this monster and I've got to stop him.

DoodleBob: Neofineyin!

See what I mean, Patrick?

Patrick: WHERE'S THE LEAK, MA'AM? Yurrgh!

You okay, Patrick?

Patrick: FINLAND! DoodleBob: Meyaiovah! Mee hoy minoy! Meah froyay!

There he is.

Patrick: He's hideous. He makes me sick, just looking at him. Those big bulgy eyes, that square body, those two buck teeth, and that stupid tie!

Uh... *ahem*.

Patrick: Oh... but it looks good on you, SpongeBob. Heh heh!

He's putting down the pencil. This is our chance. On the count of three, we'll jump out and surprise him.

Patrick: Ooh, boy, a surprise party! Is it his birthday? DoodleBob: Bawahh bwah bwah wahh!

Patrick!! Patrick! Do something!

Patrick: Happy Birthday! Patrick: Here's your present. You're welcome. DoodleBob: Dewaaagheaugaaagh!

Hold it right there, Doodle! I brought you into this world and now I'm gonna take you out. Any last words?

DoodleBob: EEDAHFAAWAHOBABOBBA!

I'm sorry, what was that?

DoodleBob: Ee...DAh...Faawa...HobaBobba...

Hold still, Doodle. This is for your own good. Take that and this and this and that and this that this that...! I AM SPONGEBOB, DESTROYER OF EVIL!

Patrick: Take it easy. It's just a drawing.

Well, that takes care of that, eh, Patrick?

Patrick: Done and done.

Gee, Gary, you should have been there! It sure was exciting, but you know, I kind of miss the little doodle. He was like a son to me. But I'm sure glad things are back to normal. Well, good night, sweet prince.

Gary: Meeeoowww.

Good night, magic pencil. Oh, hey, Magic Pencil. What are you doing up? Drawing yourself a glass of water? AAAAH! DOODLEBOB! Heh heh, no hard feelings, right? What do you think you're doing, doodle?!

DoodleBob: You Doodle! Me SpongeBob! Huh?

Be careful with that thing! Who knows what will happen? I nose. Very funny, doodle. Now it's my turn. Well, Doodle, it looks like this is a draw. You've made your point, no matter, I was voted most artistic in high school.

Squidward: Ow! SpongeBob, you're gonna pay for that!

Or maybe it was most clumsy. Huh? Paper! Page for Mr. Doodle!

Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob, what's with all the ruckus?

Take a look for yourself, Patrick.

Patrick: It's the evil Doodle!

No, no, not evil. He was just a two-dimensional creature lost in our three-dimensional aquatic world longing for a purpose.

Patrick: So... he's a drawing?

Exactly! See how happy he is?

Patrick: He still looks kind of creepy.

Oh, great Magic Pencil, your powers are too mighty for us ocean dwellers. So I will send you back to the magic kingdom from where you came. Are you ready, Patrick?

Squidward: Can you two be quiet?! Squidward: Didn't think so. What are you barnacle heads doing, anyway?

Patrick and I are practicing our favorite noises. Mine is a dolphin, laughing.

Patrick: And my favorite is the plaintiff song of the blue whale. Ahem. Whale Businessman: Huh? Did you hear that? Fish Businessman: What's wrong, Frank? Frank: That song. It sounds just like Martha! Fish Businessman: Frank, how many times do I have to tell you? Martha's no good for you! She's just no good! Squidward: Why would you want to practice such horrible sounds?

It's one of the activities in our favorite magazine. Simple-Ton: A ton of simple things to do!

Squidward: It must very challenging for you!

Oh, it is.

Patrick: Yeah, and it made me look more smart-like. What does the magazine say we should do next?

Well, let's take a look. I think we've done everything in this issue. Oh, except for this one! The Best Friend Quiz! Do you really know your best friend? Oh, this should be easy. Patrick and I know everything about each other!

Squidward: Well, you two have fun with your mutual ignominious society. SpongeBob & Patrick: Bye, Squidward! Squidward: Morons. SpongeBob & Patrick: Bye, again!

You go first, Patrick.

Patrick: Oh, no. After you, old buddy.

Au contraire. After you, mon amie.

Patrick: Please. After you, pal.

No, no, no, no, no. After you, bestest friend- -Oof!

Squidward: Just pick one! And there's another three where that came from!

I'll go first. Question 1: What is your best friend's favorite color? Hmmm.... I'm thinking........Aquamarine!

Patrick: I hate to burst your bubble, but my favorite color is........ it is aquamarine. Sorry I doubted you.

No problem. Is your best friend right, or left-handed? The answer is right-handed.

Patrick: How did you know?

Simple, Patrick! It's because you're my best friend!

Patrick: Aww!

Is your best friend's belly button have an innie or an outie?

Patrick: No peeking!

No need to peek, Patrick. I can do this with my eyes closed! You haaaaaaaaaave...

Patrick: Oh! What will his answer be? Squidward: The suspense is killing me!

...an innie!

Patrick: Well, let's just check that theory! Innie! Wow! How does he do it? Squidward: Magic. Patrick: My turn! But, give me some hard questions. Not like those softballs you answered.

Okay! First question: What is your best friend's favorite color?

Patrick: No, no! No hints! Blue! No, clear! No! That's not it. Hold on, hold on. 14.

The answer is...beige.

Patrick: Oh, barnacles! Oh, I was so close.

Question 2: Is your best friend left-handed or right-handed?

Patrick: Oh, tricky, tricky. Hmm, right, or, left? Right-handed!

Sorry, Patrick, I'm ambidextrous!

Patrick: Oh, fish paste!

Next question: Does your best friend have an innie, or an outie belly button?

Patrick: Belly button, huh? Hmm. An innie!

Sorry, Patrick. I have an outie.

Patrick: Tartar sauce!

Well, I'm sure you'll get the next one right! What is your best friend's favorite food?

Patrick: Oh! Oh! I remember! Your favorite food is a chum burger!

No.

Patrick: I thought for sure I had that one.

Okay, let's try an easy one. Is your best friend a boy or a girl?

Patrick: Ooh. That's a toughie. Hmm. Rugged biceps. Yet, delicate eyelashes. Pass!

Uh, last question!

Patrick: Ooh! This is for the win!

What shape is your best friend?

Patrick: Oh! I got this one! Um, uh, can you repeat the question?

What shape is your best friend, SpongeBob SQUAREPANTS?

Patrick: Round, flat, uh, hexagon.

SQUARE-pants.

Patrick: Ooh! It's right on the tip of my tongue!

Five seconds.

Patrick: Um, um, oh, jeez, trapezoid, pentagon, mormorphis...

Time's up!

Patrick: Triangle!

Uh, no.

Squidward: Idiots, wrecking my boat. Squidward: So, who won your stupid quiz? Patrick: It was a tie.

Well it wasn’t a tie, but we had lots of fun.

Squidward: Let me see that. a triangle?! Patrick didn't know anything about you! And he's supposed to be your best friend? Patrick: I know, it's like we're not friends at all!

Now, now. Patrick may not have passed the quiz, but like a true best friend, he's always here for me. Right, Patrick? Patrick?

Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob! I got you an ice cream.

Thank you, best friend, Patrick.

Patrick: It's your favorite! Dill Pickle Swirl with mustard and extra bacon bits!

Patrick, this is your favorite ice cream. My favorite is, plain vanilla.

Patrick: Oh, oh right. Well, more ice cream for me! Patrick: Oh, can I borrow five bucks?

Here! Take your dirty, rotten money! Ahhah! I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU ANYMORE!

Ice Cream Man: Hey, what's with him? Patrick: I guess he didn't want any ice cream. Gary: Meow-row. Meow-row-row...

It just isn't fair! Oh, who needs Patrick anyway? Rest of my life, here I come!

Patrick: Oh, hey there, SpongeBob!

Be strong, be strong, be strong, be strong! Good afternoon, Mr. Star.

Patrick: See you later!

Oh, Sandy! It was awful! Truly awful! We were like complete strangers!

Sandy: You don't need to know everything about your best friend. That's what keeps the friendship interesting!

Really?

Sandy: Maybe you and Patrick just need some time apart.

Yeah! I'll have lots of fun without Patrick!

Sandy: What a crybaby.

I don't need Patrick! I can have a good time all by myself! I can go jellyfishing! Patrick and I used to go jellyfishing...I can play leapfrog! I can blow bubbles! Uh, maybe not.

Patrick: Leedle leedle leedle lee!

Oh, it's Patrick! I can't let him see me!

Patrick: Leedle leedle lee!

Well, he doesn't seem to be missing me at all.

Patrick: Leedle leedle lee!

Nice that he's gotten over our friendship so quickly! Patrick works out at the gym? And he's hanging out with Larry the Lobster? Maybe I don't know much about Patrick, either. Patrick's shopping for cookery? Very suspicious. Oh! He's coming back! Hold it right there, Patrick!

Larry the Lobster: Hi, SpongeBob. Patrick: We were just coming to see you.

Oh, I'll bet you were... to tell me about your new best friend, Larry, I suppose?!

Larry: Whoa, settle down, little dude. I don't want to get in the middle of, whatever this is. Patrick: Well Larry is a great guy, loads of talent, and good looks.

I know, he is pretty amazing...

Patrick: He's not my best friend. He was just helping me buy a present.

Who for? Sandy?

Patrick: No. For my REAL best friend, SpongeBob SquarePants.

Really? For me? What is it? Oh! I love it! You DO know me, best friend!

Patrick: I got a pair for me too!

Oh, you're the bestest, best friend Patrick! How do I look?

Patrick: How should I know, mysterious stranger?! Plankton: Oh, come on, Karen, please! Karen: Well, if you must know... Plankton: There's nothing wrong with Chum Bucket fare. Why, look! Here's a fresh batch of a delicious new chum sauce. It's called Spicy Chum Surprise. Delectable! Karen: Oh, I'm sure it'll be a huge success! Plankton: Sorry, no time for your senseless chatter. I've got a customer to attend to! Billy: Okay, so what about the Krabby Kola? Plankton: We don't serve Krabby Kola, we carry Bucket Bubbler and Chum Cherry Blast. Billy: Okay, well then, can I just make sure I get those Krabby Fries with extra Krabby Sauce? Plankton: Ugh! How many times must I say it?! We don't carry Krabby Fries, we don't carry Krabby Kola, we don't carry Krabby Sauce, and we don't carry Krabby Patties! So, if you want any of those things, you're gonna have to go to the Krusty Krab, which is located directly across the street! Billy: Okay, thanks for the directions. Plankton: Any time. What is wrong with people?! Honestly, I don't think anyone in Bikini Bottom would know a decent meal if it looked them right in the eye and said, Hello! I'm a decent meal, wonderful to meet you! Please pay money for me and then put me in your mouth so your old pal Plankton doesn't lose everything he's spent his entire life working for! Karen: Yeah, and if anyone ever did order one of your meals, it probably would look them in the eye. Plankton: You know, Karen, sometimes I wonder if you're here to help me run the Chum Bucket or just to make me feel like I'm two inches tall. Karen: Maybe in heels. If it wasn't for me, you probably wouldn't even remember to blink! Plankton: Oh, come on! When we first met, you were little more than a jumbled mass of diodes and wires. I made you what you are today! Literally! So don't think you couldn't be replaced in a heartbeat! Ow! Karen: What's the matter? Plankton: My eye is burning and I don't know why! Karen: Blink. Plankton: Oh yeah, thanks for reminding me. Now where was I!? Karen: You were threatening to replace me. Plankton: Oh yeah! I don't need you! I can make a whole army of computers that might actually help me steal the formula! Karen: Oh, puh-leeze. Plankton: I'll show you woman! Plankton: Oh, Karen! Karen: Now what!? Plankton: Could you come here for a moment? Karen: What do you want? Plankton: Feast your, uh, screen on this. Karen: That’s my replacement!? It’s a toaster! Plankton: Ha ha ha, that, my dear, is a T-119A Compumatic, the finest of its kind. T-119A Compumatic: Good morning, sir. Plankton: Good morning, T-119A! Plankton: They're supposed to do that. Next, behold! The Noxious Enterprises Super SPU-31 Liquid-Cooled Mobile Processing Unit, a mind staggering combination of both power! And refinement. Karen: That'll help you get the formula. Plankton: And now, Karen, the piece de resistance. Have you ever witnessed such marvelous machinery? Karen: It sorta just looks like an old hair dryer taped to the back of a miniature windmill. Plankton: I can see how someone of your level of technical knowledge would think that, Karen, but in actuality what you are looking at is... oh, right. Karen: I don't recall you ever having reason to own a hair dryer, Plankton. Plankton: Okay, here we go! Are you going to make me get the picture down again!? Karen: What picture!? Plankton: You see! Plenty of reason to be using a hair dryer. Karen: Why are we even talking about this? Plankton: Because you were the one that said— Karen: What's going on!? Plankton: Dear Neptune! Plankton: Karen, do something! Quick! They're tearing each other apart! Just press a button or something! Plankton: Not that one! Karen: Well, it's good to see that that strategy didn't fall flat! Plankton: You know, Karen, with you around, I'm beginning to wonder how I'm still alive. Karen: Ohhh, so it's my fault is it? Plankton: That's right! Now it's all clear! It's you that's been holding me back! In fact, if it weren't for your constant stifling, I'd have the whole world running for the safety of their mommies! Karen: You and your crack team of robots, huh? Plankton: Well maybe I could iron out a few bugs, but then you'll see just how much I need you! Karen? What's this? It's words on paper. It says: Dear Plankton, I've logged onto another network. I just can't go into sleep mode at night knowing that you'll continue blaming me for all of your failures. Anyway, you're a grown single celled organism, and allowed to make your own syntax errors. Nice knowing you, Karen. Dah! who needs her!? Not me! I'm going to steal that Krabby Patty formula from Mr. Krabs once and for all. And then we'll see who's made the error. Ow! P.S., don't forget to blink. Oh yeah. Plankton: Okay, team, listen up. We're on our own now so we don't have anything holding us back. Now I know you all look upon me kindly since I am your creator, but the last thing the Chum Bucket needs is, if we're going to be victorious, is a bunch of soft, uh, software. Does everybody understand? Plankton: I said, does everybody understand!? Plankton: All right, then let's do this! T-119A to position! SPU-31 to position! Command Module to position! Plankton: Heh heh heh. Now let's see Krabs stop this. I'll show him. I'll show them all! Perch Perkins: This just in, a diabolical albeit haphazardly thrown-together machine is attacking Bikini Bottom and is headed straight for the Krusty Krab! Squidward: Why is the local news always such rubbish!?

Hey, Squidward, look! I figured out how to get my mop wet without dipping it in the bucket.

Squidward: SpongeBob, nobody cares about... Plankton: Hey! Krabs, I wanna see you. Mr. Krabs: Okay, boy, get out there.

Um... hello... what do you want robot thing, sir? Oh, hey Plankton! What are you doing here?