diff --git "a/train_data/en/single/train_rachel_single.txt" "b/train_data/en/single/train_rachel_single.txt" new file mode 100644--- /dev/null +++ "b/train_data/en/single/train_rachel_single.txt" @@ -0,0 +1,14089 @@ +RACHEL: I wonder how Monica and Chandler could do it? +RACHEL: So you’re gonna be in the car, I will be upstairs, and that’s where everybody’s gonna be! +RACHEL: I'm doing it, Ross is doing it, Sarah Jessica Parker is doing it! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Yes?! +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I can't believe I don't get to go to my own prom, this is so harsh. +RACHEL: Y’know what Tag, if we went down to the office you would see those contracts sitting on your desk. +RACHEL: Sorry I'm late, but I left late. +RACHEL: Yeah, sure. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Happy Thanksgiving. +RACHEL: You’re pressing the baby into my bladder and now I have to pee. +RACHEL: What’s wrong with us? +RACHEL: Hey-hey umm, uh, is there, is there any such thing as an annulment shower? +RACHEL: If you guys want to be children about this, that's fine. +RACHEL: No, wait. +RACHEL: You know how much I love that T-shirt! +RACHEL: So did you break up with Joanna? +RACHEL: So my rule is ‘no tissue, no tuschy.’ Well, if everybody’s going. +RACHEL: Well, no. +RACHEL: Yeah, but you said, Will you marry me? +RACHEL: I really. +RACHEL: Hey, Pheebs, quick question for ya. +RACHEL: Fancy soap? +RACHEL: 'Cause I don't need your stupid ship. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: It doesn't matter, you know, it's not like anything's gonna happen. +RACHEL: Hey Chandler. +RACHEL: Well what are we gonna do? +RACHEL: Ok, maybe you're right. +RACHEL: Ross, please, don't be so scared of him! +RACHEL: Just so you know. +RACHEL: Please? +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Oh wow! +RACHEL: Wow, that must’ve been awkward. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Oh give me, Hi, Mike? +RACHEL: Ha! +RACHEL: and I had to sit there for 45 minutes while he proved that that in fact, was true. +RACHEL: Yeah, well, you uh, better make it for three. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: And I don’t know, maybe I just wanted to make myself feel better. +RACHEL: No, God! +RACHEL: I mean Ross all that does is remind us that you are interested in fossils. +RACHEL: Well, there was a disaster in shipping and I've got to get this order in. +RACHEL: So you know, I. I handed in that marketing report and I never got to hear what you thought. +RACHEL: You WHAT? +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: That girl is all about the ass. +RACHEL: With the, with the lilies, and-and the song, and the stars! +RACHEL: Oh no, wait a minute, wait, I've got a presentation tomorrow. +RACHEL: Yeah, which, by the way Chandler, I would like back one of these days. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Oh, isn't that adorable? +RACHEL: Well, all right, then, forget it. +RACHEL: Take it like a man, Ross! +RACHEL: Yes, you did! +RACHEL: Well, as long as we are clear about that. +RACHEL: So, pretty much around the same time that you started telling this story. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Which means, I have five, and that means I get Joey's boxers! +RACHEL: I've never given her a cookie. +RACHEL: Gee, II know that I freaked him out. +RACHEL: You can’t leave Joey! +RACHEL: I can't eat veal, I can't wear fur, I can't go hunting. +RACHEL: He's not having an affair! +RACHEL: How did this happen to me? +RACHEL: Oh my…God! +RACHEL: Okay, whoa-whoa easy there Melissa! +RACHEL: You didn't even come and visit me when I was in the hospital having the baby. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Accept that. +RACHEL: Like in a group? +RACHEL: Umm, y’know, II would really love to, but II shouldn’t. +RACHEL: Oh, I know. +RACHEL: Oh please. +RACHEL: Yeah—but come on—Listen, I’m sorry I don’t want to make you uncomfortable, but I told Phoebe that it happened and she doesn’t believe me. +RACHEL: I can’t believe you did that. +RACHEL: Last week you thought Ross was trying to kill you! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: And that’s every bit as hard as the night. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I mean we could pack all this stuff up and y’know go to your apartment. +RACHEL: All right, well thank you so much for coming in it was nice to meet you. +RACHEL: Emma will never have a first birthday again. +RACHEL: Yeah, no, I don'tI don't put things in my eye. +RACHEL: Marcel! +RACHEL: Chandler told me. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: When was she born? +RACHEL: I forgot to turn off the bathroom light. +RACHEL: Did her ass explode?! +RACHEL: Yeah, well, feminism yes, but also the robots. +RACHEL: I kept talking about you and he kept asking me out. +RACHEL: Well, what about Mindy? +RACHEL: Oh, oh no. +RACHEL: Monica? +RACHEL: Ok, you're ready to go pick up Phoebe and go shopping? +RACHEL: Ha-ha! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Oh yes, of course, I remember him! +RACHEL: I can't, I gotta go. +RACHEL: Uhh, okay, so thank-thank you, I'm going to leave now thank you very much uh-huh, thank you so. +RACHEL: Hi you guys. +RACHEL: Oh no. +RACHEL: Look um, about what happened earlier. +RACHEL: Anyway, I'm going to be the coordinator of the woman's collection, I'll work right under the director, it's the perfect, perfect job for me! +RACHEL: Bye. +RACHEL: Isn’t that sad? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Ok, everybody, let's give a uh nice warm Central Perk welcome to. +RACHEL: Would you like some pancakes? +RACHEL: Op, ice. +RACHEL: Marcel? +RACHEL: Okay, great! +RACHEL: Alright, I can't say goodbye to you guys again. +RACHEL: Honey what would I do without you? +RACHEL: Hey Pheebs? +RACHEL: Sorry, things aren't working out so well. +RACHEL: And the chicken poops in her lap. +RACHEL: Thanks! +RACHEL: Y'know, I mean you could put, you could put money in-in the invitations! +RACHEL: Oh, it’s okay. +RACHEL: I'm just not that bright either. +RACHEL: Oh, this party was lame. +RACHEL: God, how was I supposed to know they were having problems? +RACHEL: I think I just shipped 3,000 bras to personnel. +RACHEL: Umm, well ah, maybe he, maybe he feels awkward because you are my boss. +RACHEL: No, we decided that I would go ahead and set up first, and then my mom would bring Emma to Paris on Sunday. +RACHEL: Oh, hi. +RACHEL: I’m the divisional head of men’s sportswear! +RACHEL: You keep making these stupid jokes and this sleazy innuendoes and it’s. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: What is this? +RACHEL: So I'm blowing my attack whistle thingy and three more cabs show up, and as I'm going to get into a cab she tackles me. +RACHEL: How could you do that to him! +RACHEL: Oops. +RACHEL: Oh this is just terrible, this is just terrible. +RACHEL: Another night of birdogging the chickas? +RACHEL: Right, yeah, I've heard that about cute doctors. +RACHEL: Oh, God, no problem. +RACHEL: Oh look-look it says that it holds 300 CDs. +RACHEL: Hey Jess. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: All our love Monica and Chandler. +RACHEL: Well yeah, I do, but I decided to take a long lunch and spend some time with my friend Monica. +RACHEL: Sandwiches! +RACHEL: What do you want, you want me to break my foot too? +RACHEL: Wait, what are you doing? +RACHEL: Would you have been able to forgive me? +RACHEL: So why don’t you just let me worry about making the trifle and you just worry about eating it, alright? +RACHEL: Y'know, I want a man! +RACHEL: Monica, I don't want to lose 200 dollars. +RACHEL: The Jerk department? +RACHEL: I wanna marry this plan! +RACHEL: Oh, Phoebe, that really cute guy is here again. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: What is wrong with New Year's? +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: Sit down! +RACHEL: Oh, you bought me a present! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: What is it? +RACHEL: Well, Joey probably thinks I’ll just embarrass him. +RACHEL: Are you gonna tell him who you are? +RACHEL: You look so beautiful! +RACHEL: It would be nice to have a little guarantee though. +RACHEL: I'm so sorry. +RACHEL: I don't know, I, I feel like I had a dream about you last night but I, I don't remember. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: He’s not 11! +RACHEL: And then I don’t know why but he said, and you will never get promoted. +RACHEL: You follow me? +RACHEL: Yeah I think so. +RACHEL: I mean, when you took out your own kidney to save your ex-wife even though she tried to kill you. +RACHEL: I’ve never interviewed anyone before. +RACHEL: No, no, it was my fault. +RACHEL: Central Perk is proud to present Miss Phoebe Buffay. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: This is bad. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Well, sure! +RACHEL: So what-what is the exhibit. +RACHEL: Um. +RACHEL: No accountants. +RACHEL: I’ve just been thinking about how my baby and I are gonna be all alone. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh my gosh! +RACHEL: Yeah do it now, call right now. +RACHEL: You’re a pathetic loser, right? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: Oh for God sake just pick a piece! +RACHEL: No strings attached, no relationship, just with someone that I feel comfortable with and who knows what he’s doing. +RACHEL: That's the creepiest thing I've ever heard! +RACHEL: It’s like I’m right there with Joshua. +RACHEL: And I'm so good with. +RACHEL: Ross, what are you talking about? +RACHEL: Oh ok. Ok. Ok, I've got one. +RACHEL: Alright, okay, okay, gleba, gleba. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Mon, thanks! +RACHEL: Oh, come on Ross! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Alright! +RACHEL: What are you doing here? +RACHEL: Ross's what? +RACHEL: Well I—That’s never gonna happen with Ross. +RACHEL: You were supposed to tell her to come, and I was supposed to bring the cake! +RACHEL: Single mom, career. +RACHEL: She won a thousand dollars! +RACHEL: Ok, uh, Billy Dreskin, Pete Carney, Barry, and uh, oh, Paolo. +RACHEL: Yeah, I know. +RACHEL: Oh God, ohh, okay, y'know what, do you think ah, do you think that you just forget that I told you this? +RACHEL: It's so that I can spend Thanksgiving with my family. +RACHEL: I’ll pay. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Agh, it was the graduation from hell. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Noo. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Are you sure you wanna hear this? +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: And I have loved these last nine months! +RACHEL: You have a son! +RACHEL: Well, uhm, whatever, I have really appreciated it, 'cause I don’t think I would be the person that I am today if it wasn’t for you guys. +RACHEL: She could be you. +RACHEL: You totally got him back for calling you fat! +RACHEL: 3-2-1 oh! +RACHEL: And, I was not afraid to stand up for myself and that shows courage. +RACHEL: Who's George Snuffalopagus? +RACHEL: Oh, you guys, I can't believe this. +RACHEL: Who is it? +RACHEL: It's your hair. +RACHEL: What's the matter? +RACHEL: You guys, come on, this is, I have to meet Joshua! +RACHEL: There you go! +RACHEL: No, I was ten. +RACHEL: I guess. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I mean, what brought that on? +RACHEL: You ready? +RACHEL: I’m more than okay, I am really, really happy! +RACHEL: I am so jealous! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: My eye is a 100 better. +RACHEL: No you guys! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Oh, wait before you guys go, can I just ask you a question? +RACHEL: That’s all right. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: I am a woman who spent a lot of money on a dress and she wants to wear it, because soon she won’t be able to fit into it. +RACHEL: Phoebe, ours is totally different! +RACHEL: That shows integrity. +RACHEL: I don't know, I don't know, weren't you the guy that told me to quit my job when I had absolutely nothing else to do. +RACHEL: You want me to kick his ass? +RACHEL: Come on, this is all way too. +RACHEL: Excuse me. +RACHEL: So uh, Ryan, were you shipping off to? +RACHEL: Well, I guess I could take a couple days off work. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I knew. +RACHEL: Oh, so you just sort of happened to leave it in here? +RACHEL: Hi Danny! +RACHEL: Do ya? +RACHEL: That’s fine! +RACHEL: I guess so. +RACHEL: The black or the purple? +RACHEL: How are ya? +RACHEL: I mean, listen! +RACHEL: Well, at first it was really intense, you know. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I did the stupidest, most embarrassing thing! +RACHEL: Joey, you’re such an amazing actor! +RACHEL: Now be very careful Rachel! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: I am so mad! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: I am not gonna get fired, because I’m not gonna act on it. +RACHEL: I guess women aren’t that great either. +RACHEL: See, every year we go skiing in Vail, and normally my father pays for my ticket, but I sort of started the whole independence thing, you know, which is actually why I took this job. +RACHEL: No, no, it's just that it's getting late. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Oh, see now I feel bad for the kid! +RACHEL: That was fun. +RACHEL: It's driving me crazy! +RACHEL: I actually feel like I’m going on a real date! +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Wow that's uh, juicy. +RACHEL: Why don't you just let her go on after Stephanie whatever-her-name-is. +RACHEL: Oh, Monica, c'mon, you do cool things. +RACHEL: Oh, okay, so I'm sorry, what-what were you-what did you want to tell me? +RACHEL: Yes, I know that. +RACHEL: What are you reading? +RACHEL: Look Ross, if you’re so freaked out, just get in the car! +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: Oh no, I know that. +RACHEL: I'm sorry about your girlfriend. +RACHEL: And you know Monica and Ross! +RACHEL: I mean how different would my life be? +RACHEL: Ho-ho-hold on a sec there, Mr. Kissey! +RACHEL: Oh stop that! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Joey, I really don’t. +RACHEL: Could you get that? +RACHEL: Ah. +RACHEL: I’ve been trying to fight it, but you just said all the right things. +RACHEL: But I. +RACHEL: Get out! +RACHEL: Barry? +RACHEL: Thanks, but I gotta go to work and get my eyes scratched. +RACHEL: They used to live here sometimes they migrate back over. +RACHEL: I mean, when I signed up for Dino Week, nobody said anything about it being monsoon season. +RACHEL: Okay, everybody, it’s trifle time! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: No, no, no, no! +RACHEL: Y'know, like I’d be cheating on Ross or something. +RACHEL: It's already started. +RACHEL: What-wh-what so we’ll just stay married forever?! +RACHEL: Okay, aahhh. +RACHEL: No wait a minute! +RACHEL: So y’know, I have all of these feelings and I don’t know what to do about them, because I can’t date like a normal person, which is fine because I don’t need a relationship, I mean all I really want is one great night. +RACHEL: You are so sweet. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I hope Emily is a lesbian. +RACHEL: I told you! +RACHEL: Throw in the duck too! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Are you and Julie not, are, are you and, are you and Julie not having sex? +RACHEL: When we were together, you got all freaked out about Mark and there was nothing going on. +RACHEL: I'm sure her picture's up! +RACHEL: She's right. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: She is not Rachem. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: And I'm just gonna pay for this with a check. +RACHEL: I mean I think I’d say no to anybody right now. +RACHEL: Ok, wow, you know what. +RACHEL: I need ice. +RACHEL: I'm just calling to say that um, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat. +RACHEL: This is gonna be good. +RACHEL: I handled the situation horribly and I should not have lied to you. +RACHEL: How you doin'? +RACHEL: See what you did, I’m gonna be doing it by myself now. +RACHEL: Ok, let's not make a big thing about this! +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: But this is a purebred, show-quality Sphinx cat! +RACHEL: Well then Joey, what the hell were you doing with an engagement ring?! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Ohh, God, I just got so nervous that he would say no. +RACHEL: Yeah, it is. +RACHEL: He's asking her a question! +RACHEL: Oh, umm, I was just y know working out and umm, Oh, that s it. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Oh, my, god. +RACHEL: Okay sir, um-mm, let see if I got this right. +RACHEL: I had one glass. +RACHEL: Oh, wow! +RACHEL: Oh, god, what do we do, what do we do? +RACHEL: Excuse us for a minute. +RACHEL: Oh, that’s funny, I can’t believe I did that. +RACHEL: You got her to stop crying! +RACHEL: Yeah, we got him back. +RACHEL: Ross, those things go like 40 miles an hour! +RACHEL: I know, that old lady at the end was ready to take you home. +RACHEL: I, I like not knowing right now and I'm sorry if that scares you but if you want to be with me you are gonna have to deal with that. +RACHEL: Look, Charlie, I just want you to know. +RACHEL: I do not know what's wrong with us, I mean, we have kissed before and that's been great! +RACHEL: Daddy. +RACHEL: And uh, y’know, yesteryear. +RACHEL: That was surreal. +RACHEL: It was just a momentary lapse. +RACHEL: Oh, um, no, no, no, no excuse me, hello. +RACHEL: Well okay—Well don’t ruin it! +RACHEL: Well can we see it?! +RACHEL: Oh my god! +RACHEL: Let’s, let’s talk later. +RACHEL: You are arrogant, you are pompous. +RACHEL: Well, I, you know, III don't know what to say. +RACHEL: Oh, can I throw up in my diaper genie? +RACHEL: I could, I could but I don't want to! +RACHEL: Well, from me. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Yeah me too. +RACHEL: I did it. +RACHEL: All right, it’s okay. +RACHEL: Go to the post office! +RACHEL: How do I get that? +RACHEL: So you're driving up to Connecticut? +RACHEL: Ok! +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: And also, you know I uh, I was thinking about what you said, you know, about the whole sex thing and, it's probably not a great idea to go down that road again. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Nice! +RACHEL: And besides, I y'know, I think he really likes you. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: That's OK! +RACHEL: His new girlfriend! +RACHEL: Oh, it's so much more fun with you. +RACHEL: Y'know what, you should have the other waitresses do that too. +RACHEL: Carol…Lesbian? +RACHEL: That way, it will be the first thing that you see when you walk in the door! +RACHEL: It's a shame though, I mean, when we did it, it was pretty good. +RACHEL: He’s been incredibly supportive of me, and if he gets a little upset that’s what the meatball sub is for. +RACHEL: This place is fabulous! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Joey, there is a perfectly good couch across the hall! +RACHEL: He was just drooling all over you. +RACHEL: Hypothetically! +RACHEL: I a not gonna lie to you, I'm pretty sick. +RACHEL: You might not remember us, but we are the girls that fogged you. +RACHEL: Chandler, would you just tell her what she did was wrong? +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Okay fine, what do you have? +RACHEL: Big night! +RACHEL: You picked Joey and Ross?! +RACHEL: Congratulations! +RACHEL: You think I trust you with it?! +RACHEL: We just need to make fast decisions! +RACHEL: I'll never forget it. +RACHEL: You're welcome. +RACHEL: You're right, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: So uh, Pheebs, honey, how are those mood swings coming? +RACHEL: Yeah, I did. +RACHEL: Oh, it was great. +RACHEL: I can't believe I'm waking up next to you. +RACHEL: I’mI’m gonna lose my job! +RACHEL: No, I don’t. +RACHEL: I know that too. +RACHEL: I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didn't even buy it! +RACHEL: It'll be like our first y’know roommate bonding thing. +RACHEL: Okidoki! +RACHEL: So umm, sorry I got us into this mess. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: What are you doing?! +RACHEL: You're a shoe, you're a shoe, you're a shoe!'. +RACHEL: OK, so that's, that's what, two bottles, and yet somehow we went through five? +RACHEL: It's like Sophie's Choice. +RACHEL: I have so got it. +RACHEL: Bloomingdale's eliminated my department. +RACHEL: Seriously, don’t look at it. +RACHEL: Apparently babies and weddings don't mix. +RACHEL: Oh great! +RACHEL: We do have something to eat. +RACHEL: I KNOW! +RACHEL: Yeah please, you guys have fun. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Yeah you like totally let him wash his feet in the pool of your inner power. +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Sometimes I can’t believe it’s with you—But still! +RACHEL: If its ok with Monica I would like to invite Amy to Thanksgiving. +RACHEL: Yeah, we're gonna, we're gonna get some cake. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: She's really making her way through the group, huh? +RACHEL: How could I be upset over something I never had? +RACHEL: And there's a peach cobbler warming in the oven so the plate's gonna be hot but that shouldn't be a problem for you. +RACHEL: Dear losers, do you really think I’d hide presents under the couch? +RACHEL: It was like you were marking your territory. +RACHEL: Hit me. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh, not much. +RACHEL: Ohh, well you got ‘em. +RACHEL: Well I……I would just like to say that Joey truly has enriched the days of ourlives. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: What d'you want? +RACHEL: It wasn't easy, but it's your birthday and I did what I got to do. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: This is Chandler. +RACHEL: Not at all inappropriate! +RACHEL: Yes I do. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Ooh, ooh, this feels sooo good against my cheek! +RACHEL: What about all the women you want to bring home? +RACHEL: And it was uneven for weeks! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Yes, the hard part is truly over. +RACHEL: It's a shoulder bag. +RACHEL: I just always assumed Phoebe would be the one to go. +RACHEL: Hi, sure! +RACHEL: No-no-no! +RACHEL: II do, do that. +RACHEL: And I'm in it? +RACHEL: Oh, I've gotta see you. +RACHEL: Yeah, right, he almost danced me right down that garbage chute. +RACHEL: Thanks. +RACHEL: Y’know, when two people break up but they get back together for just one night. +RACHEL: I’m busy. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Oh wait. +RACHEL: That was fantastic, I almost leaned in. +RACHEL: Y'know. +RACHEL: How was she? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Um, my, father. +RACHEL: OK, well, bye-bye again. +RACHEL: No, I don’t think we’ll be doing that. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Ok. Airport, airport. +RACHEL: Okay, Joey Tribbiani invited me back to his apartment, now does he do this with a lot of girls? +RACHEL: Rachel. +RACHEL: Good luck to you. +RACHEL: You said girl! +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: Tommyyyy! +RACHEL: Oh, somebody will. +RACHEL: I was giving you an appology and you were totally checking her out! +RACHEL: Oh, well, are hey, are you nervous? +RACHEL: We should defiantly play football more often. +RACHEL: Monica?! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: All right, you know what, that's fine. +RACHEL: This is Chandler, Joey, Phoebe and you know Mon. +RACHEL: That's why he's sending you to that play! +RACHEL: So it’s sorta like… Y’know? +RACHEL: Did I just say Greens don’t quit?! +RACHEL: You're kidding! +RACHEL: Mrs. Bing, I have to tell you, I've read everything you've ever written. +RACHEL: All right, I took them. +RACHEL: Are you kidding?! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Funny, because I was just gonna go across the hall and write that on Chandler. +RACHEL: When we go back to New York, I will tell him. +RACHEL: Oh that's okay. +RACHEL: What bra? +RACHEL: I did not mean to touch that. +RACHEL: Oh, I cannot believe it! +RACHEL: Mark is so sweet. +RACHEL: Okay well Ross! +RACHEL: I cannot believe you guys! +RACHEL: I meant y’know are you still a ‘We’ or are you just ‘You?’ Ohh. +RACHEL: Ohhh! +RACHEL: No way! +RACHEL: Congratulations on your new job. +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I think I'm gonna have to go with the dog. +RACHEL: Yep. +RACHEL: Why?! +RACHEL: If I said I was, would you judge me? +RACHEL: Of course I clean it. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Y'know, if it's not a headboard, it's just not worth it. +RACHEL: Yes? +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Oh, you are a petty man. +RACHEL: This is a movie stub from our first date! +RACHEL: Well what is it? +RACHEL: It's amazing. +RACHEL: Your teeth? +RACHEL: Come on, I don't really want to be doing this right now. +RACHEL: You guys! +RACHEL: No, no, that's ok. You won fair and square. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: I mean you might have well have just come in and peed all around my desk! +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Yeah, I do. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: That’s him! +RACHEL: Shake it! +RACHEL: Joey was there too. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh, what do you, you want me to stop seeing him, is that what you want? +RACHEL: I’m guess I’m just done with the whole dating thing. +RACHEL: So what's going on with you? +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Okay Ross, we’re, wait a minute. +RACHEL: You have to help me! +RACHEL: I would kill for a salmon skin roll right now! +RACHEL: But you will, you will be performing a service. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Vrrbddy, the bll is drrbing. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Well thank you, you too. +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Sp-spoil? +RACHEL: So wait, this guy goes down for like two years at a time? +RACHEL: So where’d you grow up? +RACHEL: Now! +RACHEL: Ok well, I heard that! +RACHEL: Well, it seems to me if you'd done the right thing, I would not have woken up today feeling stupid and embarrassed, I would have woken up feeling comforted and satisfied! +RACHEL: Take the top down did ya? +RACHEL: Unbelievable! +RACHEL: Is that some stupid paleontology word that I wouldn't know because I'm just a waitress. +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: Yeah, don’t push it though. +RACHEL: Umm, I just wanted you to know that Ross really is a great guy. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Alright! +RACHEL: Oh yes. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Rossy, Rossy. +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: I’m not here! +RACHEL: Why don't you just return the book, let Joey give her the clock pen, and you give her something worse than that. +RACHEL: Hey Ross? +RACHEL: No, not yet. +RACHEL: Shoot, shoot, this is never gonna work! +RACHEL: Because I have my sister on hold, and she said that we could use her cabin for the weekend and go skiing. +RACHEL: Come on. +RACHEL: I. I. I. Oh, I'm sure gonna miss pretending to laugh at your weird jokes that I don't get. +RACHEL: Hey, listen umm, what-what are you doing tonight? +RACHEL: Sorry to bother you, but I don't think we can accept your acceptance of our apology, it just doesn't really seem like you mean it. +RACHEL: Oh no-no-no-no-no, no, no! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: It’s weird. +RACHEL: I'm fine going back to a job where I've pretty much gotten everything out of that I possibly can. +RACHEL: What, the blonde with no bra? +RACHEL: His father tried to put you out of business! +RACHEL: Good. +RACHEL: Whatever happened to just singing for no reason? +RACHEL: Ok, Ross, what’s going on here, are we just bringing strange women back to the apartment now? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I can’t. +RACHEL: He said this is what you guys do. +RACHEL: We are so over! +RACHEL: Aside from the fact that you said you had them? +RACHEL: I'm talking to Rome. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah I think I’m gonna find my own place. +RACHEL: Oh my god! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Vegas? +RACHEL: Are you ok? +RACHEL: I mean you've seen me naked hundreds of times. +RACHEL: Alright look, I refuse to get sucked into this like, weird little Geller dimension thing OK. +RACHEL: Pam! +RACHEL: Oh, Joey, look who it is. +RACHEL: Why do you care about the guy who won the Paris trip? +RACHEL: Oh, I’m sorry! +RACHEL: I’m really, really not. +RACHEL: Do you want my pickle? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I was just saying goodnight to Emma and she said her first words! +RACHEL: Where am I gonna get a cowgirl outfit on Thanksgiving? +RACHEL: I think you gotta give me drugs or you gotta light a fire up in there and just smoke it out. +RACHEL: We took her to lunch. +RACHEL: Oh come on Ross, why are we wasting our time with this other stuff?! +RACHEL: I think we can do this if we just get organized. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: But you know that I figure it it has to work out. +RACHEL: It’s funny! +RACHEL: I bet he sensed that I was ready to have sex with another guy. +RACHEL: I mean, naturally, you know, I said no. +RACHEL: So you eh, you talked to Joey? +RACHEL: This guy is a nightmare! +RACHEL: I mean its amazing Pheebs. +RACHEL: I had to do it for my career! +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Joey, do they know that we know? +RACHEL: Everybody snacks when they shop. +RACHEL: Well look, if you don’t like this. +RACHEL: Uh, yeah, if you want too. +RACHEL: Oh, it's a Macy's bag! +RACHEL: Come on Ross give me the keys! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: No, you're not! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Uh-hmm. +RACHEL: No, no, no! +RACHEL: Hey, that is the…baby’s problem. +RACHEL: Okay Joey honey, you’re doing really good! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Huh? +RACHEL: I mean not that sitting at home worrying about giving birth to a sixteen pound baby is not fun. +RACHEL: Do I have to decide right now? +RACHEL: Are you makin’ him a sandwich? +RACHEL: Y'know, it was clear. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: What handsome is not your type? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I mean, you had a sketch! +RACHEL: You can't help me. +RACHEL: Ohh, Jessica Lockhart! +RACHEL: I need another soda! +RACHEL: Oh, OH! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Oh, I would love some, but you know what? +RACHEL: Oh, wow thanks! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh-oh, wait did you hear that-hear that? +RACHEL: They told me that if I didn't come back today, they were gonna fire me. +RACHEL: She was just crawling around and she found him, so I just let her sleep with him. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Although, I’m really gonna miss living with you. +RACHEL: Arghh! +RACHEL: Yes you do. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: It's not gonna cost you anything. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: You never even where that T-shirt! +RACHEL: You found me a guy? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Did you at least win the contest? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: I want it to be amazing. +RACHEL: Oh how can you possibly know? +RACHEL: Oh well yeah me too. +RACHEL: Monica. +RACHEL: Well, so what're you gonna do? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Y’know what, I’m just gonna take it all away, ‘cause that way you’ll just really learn the lesson. +RACHEL: Give it here. +RACHEL: Tit for tat. +RACHEL: What are doing?! +RACHEL: You know what else I’m not gonna miss? +RACHEL: Ok, Ross, Ross, ok listen, what we have is amazing. +RACHEL: They’re having their baby! +RACHEL: Bad, bad. +RACHEL: Oh God, that's right. +RACHEL: Are you okay? +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: I, but, I mean is that okay? +RACHEL: Well uh, yes and no. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: I just felt like hangin' out here and reading. +RACHEL: OK, Ross, listen to me, I am not yours to save. +RACHEL: I don't know where the phone is. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Well it happened about six weeks ago, and uh I had just got home from work and Ross was already there ‘cause I guess he had been hanging out with Joey. +RACHEL: No, not at all, not at all. +RACHEL: But, Pheebs, you can still use the copy machine where I actually work. +RACHEL: Wrong! +RACHEL: She dropped her sock. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: They’re gonna hear you! +RACHEL: That was not funny! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Look at this little drawers! +RACHEL: Yes, they will! +RACHEL: Every thing's-they're fine. +RACHEL: No, I should say something to him. +RACHEL: I saw my name. +RACHEL: It wasn't just the Weebles, but it was the Weeble Play Palace, and, and the Weebles' Cruise Ship, oh, which, which had this little lifeboat for the Weebles to wobble in. +RACHEL: Are you okay? +RACHEL: Oh, I’m not doing it alone. +RACHEL: No Monica! +RACHEL: Who did that? +RACHEL: OK, OK, look, woah, I promise, I'm good, I'm not gonna laugh anymore. +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: And-and the interview part went so well, y'know? +RACHEL: Ross is married. +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: Y’know it’s just, it’s for the best, y’know it is, it’s, Y’know, plus, somebody’s got to stay here with Phoebe! +RACHEL: Now I’m all freaked out. +RACHEL: So if that sounds like I'm okay, okay, then you can tell them I'm okay, okay? +RACHEL: A year? +RACHEL: I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Phoebe just because I'm alone doesn’t mean I wanna walk around naked. +RACHEL: And. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I mean, what’s-what’s the first thing that I say? +RACHEL: And I mean, the connection, I mean y’know, emotionally, mentally, physically. +RACHEL: I want to do this. +RACHEL: Ross was just Ross, just this guy. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: In your face! +RACHEL: There is no more left, left! +RACHEL: I’m so happy for them! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Basically, there's the thing, and then there's the stuff after the thing. +RACHEL: Oh really? +RACHEL: Ohh, it's me and La Poo! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Because y'know what? +RACHEL: If I was in 36D, we would not be having this problem. +RACHEL: No, II live with Phoebe. +RACHEL: God y’know, if someone told me a week ago that I would be peeing in Joey Tribbiani’s apartment. +RACHEL: Me?! +RACHEL: How is she? +RACHEL: Let me get my coat. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Phoebe?! +RACHEL: You wanna go over and give a little shout out to the old, hot chickas? +RACHEL: Yeah, he dumped me. +RACHEL: How do you know about that? +RACHEL: God Ross, what were you thinking? +RACHEL: Oh well, y'know, the gala had to end sometime. +RACHEL: Now come on, you cannot do this to a pregnant woman! +RACHEL: Thanks. +RACHEL: Well Monica seems to think it's because you have feelings for me. +RACHEL: Shoot! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh, no! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: What's the matter with you? +RACHEL: What, what, wait a minute! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: What, no, no, Tuesday, we can't wait until Tuesday, we're having a party tonight. +RACHEL: Where was she? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: No we weren’t! +RACHEL: Yes, and grumpy. +RACHEL: II don't know. +RACHEL: Hey-hey, you planning on inviting us? +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Um. +RACHEL: Isn’t it cool! +RACHEL: I love you so much. +RACHEL: How do you know where Dr. Drake Remoray leaves off and Joey Tribbiani begins? +RACHEL: What-what are-what are these? +RACHEL: I’ll squeeze you fresh orange juice every morning! +RACHEL: Okay, that is all you. +RACHEL: I know, so do I. Oh Phoebe, I'm so glad you made me do this. +RACHEL: Oh, it was only okay. +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Shh, shhh. +RACHEL: They're in Vermont! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Well, these aren't mine. +RACHEL: Hey, you know, before you said that nothing could happen between us? +RACHEL: Look at that. +RACHEL: Joey, the new chair will be here in an hour. +RACHEL: I’m not paying for half of that! +RACHEL: He was the weeper. +RACHEL: Oh, by the way Mon, I don't think the mailman liked your cookies. +RACHEL: Right? +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: Can you watch Emma today? +RACHEL: Open your drapes! +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Well that’s gross, why don’t you just take it outside and throw it in a dumpster? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: OK, well, bye. +RACHEL: Oh, I'm so happy. +RACHEL: Whew. +RACHEL: You know, like Cher, or, you know, Moses. +RACHEL: How, how did end up in Vermont with that awful witch?! +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: Hey, Mon, you want some help? +RACHEL: So do you uh, think we can get you one of those uh, uniform things? +RACHEL: So, Monica? +RACHEL: No-no, I’m staying put. +RACHEL: Have you? +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: Umm, I think he’s still out. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: All right, well, everybody just remember where they were sitting. +RACHEL: Uuuh! +RACHEL: Y'know, you should never be allowed to talk to people! +RACHEL: He’s looking at me. +RACHEL: Hi boots. +RACHEL: But this time it was leading somewhere and I was very aware of the fact that it was Joey touching me. +RACHEL: So Pheebs, what do you want for your birthday? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Here you go Pheebs. +RACHEL: I thought we have moved on! +RACHEL: It's bad enough that she's stolen the guy who might actually be the person that I am supposed to be with, but now, she's actually, but now she's actually stealing you. +RACHEL: It looks like the Easter Bunny’s funeral in here. +RACHEL: I'm just trying to look nice for your big night. +RACHEL: She just called and said that she was gonna be working late! +RACHEL: Oh, that doesn't mean anything. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: But. +RACHEL: Are you gonna go run tell Monica?! +RACHEL: This is too awful! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: You didn't get one. +RACHEL: WWhat are you, what are you talking about? +RACHEL: Joey, it would mean so. +RACHEL: Smell familiar? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Don’t! +RACHEL: Oh, quick he’s looking over here, say something funny. +RACHEL: I'm doin' good, baby. +RACHEL: Uh huh, ok then. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Okay-okay-okay-okay-okay-okay-okay! +RACHEL: Which one do you think she is? +RACHEL: Joey has got a secret peephole! +RACHEL: Yeah, that was an awesome day! +RACHEL: Y’know you’re-you’re probably wondering about the old date on there. +RACHEL: Pheebs is your grandmother maybe saying that you should live here alone? +RACHEL: Huh, well maybe it uh, it changed. +RACHEL: What’s up? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: She's almost never right. +RACHEL: So wh? +RACHEL: There might be doctors there. +RACHEL: Alright, fine. +RACHEL: Oh, I don't know. +RACHEL: Please, Ross, you gotta know there is nothing between me and Mark. +RACHEL: Do you need me to train somebody new? +RACHEL: Again. +RACHEL: Okay, do you see, do you see what you’re keeping me married too?! +RACHEL: You were supposed to be in there so I could see your thing! +RACHEL: It’s my turn! +RACHEL: What. +RACHEL: OK, lemme se yours. +RACHEL: Get up! +RACHEL: We're just gonna power through! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Yes you are! +RACHEL: Joey, something feels weird and not good weird. +RACHEL: Yeah, and could you please chop some up and just put it right there in the sauce? +RACHEL: So are we good? +RACHEL: Did you see that? +RACHEL: No, nothin'. +RACHEL: It's a cat! +RACHEL: Please, no, go, that'd be fine! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Wow, you guys are terrible! +RACHEL: Everybody. +RACHEL: Is Joanna in already? +RACHEL: That was a complete misunderstanding. +RACHEL: I'm gonna give you my weeks notice. +RACHEL: No, you know what, it's late, everything's gonna be closed. +RACHEL: I called all the people in Monica’s phone book and these are the only ones who could show up on 24 hours notice. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: You're not going anywhere. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I mean, this is really becoming like a weird obsession thing. +RACHEL: I’m asking you first, right?! +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I’ll be out in a second. +RACHEL: Don't! +RACHEL: What's wrong with you? +RACHEL: I can't believe this. +RACHEL: My dog died! +RACHEL: Don’t go in there! +RACHEL: Uh, how did I do? +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: I thought I was making him filet mignon? +RACHEL: Hey, Pheebs, want this? +RACHEL: Yeah, Monica's settin' me up. +RACHEL: One of those little uh, portable CD players. +RACHEL: Ohh, yeah, well I wanted to give Emily a big American good-bye cheer. +RACHEL: Well obviously I won’t be able to come, for those of you who haven’t checked their calendars today is my due date. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Well, umm, I guess I read Little Women more than once. +RACHEL: I know, it's huge, and it's scary, and it's, really far, far away from you guys, but this is such an incredible opportunity for me. +RACHEL: Go! +RACHEL: And, and when I'm in a café, having coffee, or I see a man with hair brighter than the sun, I'll think of you. +RACHEL: Ohh, God! +RACHEL: That’s your new job, day and night, she starts crying I need you here. +RACHEL: I meant that he's gonna be paying that other woman beause she's a professional. +RACHEL: That’s weird, Phoebe doesn’t. +RACHEL: Last night was just wonderful. +RACHEL: She-she died Jill. +RACHEL: Ooh, I have to go pack. +RACHEL: Yeah, sure Mr. Zelner, for you anything, minute. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Listen. +RACHEL: No Joey! +RACHEL: Ok, you know what, I'm just gonna take her outside. +RACHEL: That’s not enough… What are you doing?! +RACHEL: Are you pregnant?! +RACHEL: That’s nothing. +RACHEL: So you were saying? +RACHEL: That is soo sweet! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Umm, listen, I'm gonna need to take a rain check, my roommate is just really sick. +RACHEL: Monica, what is so amazing? +RACHEL: Oh, you're not gonna do a magic trick, are ya? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Just once! +RACHEL: Straight! +RACHEL: What the hell is wrong with you?! +RACHEL: Oh, wait Joey! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: You’re very talented. +RACHEL: But only if it’s a girl. +RACHEL: A-alright! +RACHEL: Yeah that’s actually a pretty good idea. +RACHEL: You gave me a tiney-wienie! +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: Joey, y'know you get any mustard on that bag, you can't return it. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Ssshyeah, well, duh! +RACHEL: What's going on? +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Good day, sir. +RACHEL: Alright well, see, I mean, Barry wouldn t even kiss me on a minature golf course. +RACHEL: Chandler! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Jerk missed his flight. +RACHEL: I’m not just gonna sit around like some old lady. +RACHEL: I’m fine! +RACHEL: Yeah, II don't care. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: And remember how you always said you were afraid the landlord would find out and then tear it down? +RACHEL: What're they called, what're they called, what're they called? +RACHEL: And I'm going be very very nice to you, you momma's boy, starting right now. +RACHEL: Oh great. +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: I know, I'm her! +RACHEL: Y’know, you fight, you make up, it’s just the way it works. +RACHEL: Ohh that’s nice. +RACHEL: It’s not a perfect world! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: I judged you. +RACHEL: Oh, you know what. +RACHEL: No, we kinda broke up instead. +RACHEL: I mean, you're right. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: It's a true testament to what a girl from long island would do for a Celica. +RACHEL: My God! +RACHEL: But I told you, I didn't have the time! +RACHEL: Don’t! +RACHEL: Basketball! +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: I can't believe you guys are actually think you're moving in here! +RACHEL: That is—that’s great—that is really great-great news. +RACHEL: We have to get her a present?! +RACHEL: Ugh, I could just kill you! +RACHEL: I don’t see you weeping because you put your slippers on the wrong feet. +RACHEL: Lighting the candles, naked, and carefully. +RACHEL: Ahh! +RACHEL: Oh, we’re leaving. +RACHEL: I mean, are, are ya gonna, are ya gonna talk about it before hand, are you just gonna pounce? +RACHEL: She didn't hang up either. +RACHEL: And last year is that why you sent us to that medieval times restaurant? +RACHEL: When she sees that you’re gone, she’s gonna know that I let you out, and that I was in here, and I’m gonna get fired! +RACHEL: Well, are we all together? +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Come on, Joey, I did it and it was fine. +RACHEL: Chandler, you stole this cheesecake. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Kill 'um! +RACHEL: Joey, are you sure? +RACHEL: Well, I sorta did a stupid thing last night. +RACHEL: Steve sleeve. +RACHEL: I am finally thinking clearly. +RACHEL: No, Monica! +RACHEL: You think it looked amazing? +RACHEL: What a bitch. +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Yeah, and Lennart Haze is starring in it… You saw that? +RACHEL: I am carrying a very heavy couch. +RACHEL: No-no, I love it. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Please don’t leave like this! +RACHEL: Phoebe and I saw Chandler with a blonde woman today outside on the street and then we followed them to a house in Westchester. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Did you check all the drawers! +RACHEL: Well, I didn't know what else to do! +RACHEL: When Joey and I were together, he was wonderful. +RACHEL: If she said to you, Ross, I want you on this couch, Hello? +RACHEL: Right! +RACHEL: Or ya know, he's rubber and you're glue. +RACHEL: But I’m being so unreasonable. +RACHEL: Oh God, I really had a good time! +RACHEL: Oh, well. +RACHEL: What’s goin’ on? +RACHEL: Hello. +RACHEL: Ooh! +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: So, it was right in the middle of a staff meeting so of course no one else wants to correct her so everyone else is calling me Raquel! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Wait a minute. +RACHEL: I did! +RACHEL: She taught me Spanish. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh well, hello. +RACHEL: Wooo! +RACHEL: Wow you, you. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: They haven't even slept together yet, I mean, that's not serious. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I was at the airport, getting into a cab, when this woman this blonde planet with a pocketbook starts yelling at me. +RACHEL: Mindy, if it'll make you feel any. +RACHEL: I'm not giving you Emma because there is no way you could handle the responibility of a child. +RACHEL: And then he eats chicken and looks at them! +RACHEL: Let's just do it. +RACHEL: Oh, hi sweetie. +RACHEL: My grandmother had one of these when I was a little girl and it was the sweetest thing! +RACHEL: And it is a big deal! +RACHEL: Ok, uh-uh. +RACHEL: Ok, that's it! +RACHEL: Oh not bad. +RACHEL: You know? +RACHEL: This is so stupid! +RACHEL: Oh my god. +RACHEL: But I had too! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I'm talking to my boss right now! +RACHEL: It doesn’t matter. +RACHEL: Is everything okay? +RACHEL: There, are you happy now? +RACHEL: No, but it's good, you know, I'm gonna take some time off and do some charity work. +RACHEL: So really nothing happened. +RACHEL: Monica just broke my seashell lamp. +RACHEL: Go. +RACHEL: I’m so happy and not at all jealous. +RACHEL: And it means a lot if you could try to get on board. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I’m gonna have a boyfriend, you’re gonna have a girlfriend. +RACHEL: You didn’t get anybody pregnant! +RACHEL: Congratulations. +RACHEL: What are these for? +RACHEL: Ya know, I swear this is the best I have ever had. +RACHEL: Oh my, you think I’m a pushover. +RACHEL: Oh, it's our nanny! +RACHEL: Remember when we were in high school together? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: She ll get trampled! +RACHEL: Yeah, fair enough. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Y'know if what I do is so lame, then why did you insist on coming with me this morning? +RACHEL: Uh, I think I just did. +RACHEL: Well, the that cat, the ca cat, turned out to be Paolo s cat, Int that funny. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Tommy’s supposed to be here soon, we’re going to lunch. +RACHEL: That is a doll. +RACHEL: I was going to let you use my Ralph Lauren discount. +RACHEL: Thanks, you guys. +RACHEL: Sorry, I just thought you were somebody else. +RACHEL: Well, they never have any paper in there y'know. +RACHEL: Monica, I'm quitting! +RACHEL: That's 'cause you have it. +RACHEL: I am lousy at packing! +RACHEL: Well, honey that was pretty obvious. +RACHEL: Excuse me, I'm sorry, I'm gonna have to call you back, I've got a Schemp in my office. +RACHEL: We don’t want it-it to be too much, we want it to be subtle. +RACHEL: Wiper blades. +RACHEL: Or, cut! +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Ross, what’s the big deal? +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: Oh that's so great, now Emma has two Hugsy's. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Please, somebody say something. +RACHEL: And did you notice? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: So what? +RACHEL: Excited? +RACHEL: Oh my God Ross! +RACHEL: Joshua’s not gonna be there. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Ladies and gentlemen, back by popular demand, Miss Phoebe Buffay. +RACHEL: Kinda hurtin’ my hand though. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: The luggage that I'm taking is in the bedroom, this is Emma's Paris stuff, these are the boxes that I'm having shipped, and that's the sandwich that I made for the plane. +RACHEL: No, she had to have just taken that test because I took out the trash last night. +RACHEL: Whew, that just seems like a lot, huh? +RACHEL: Well, I took it. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Well, if you go to Disneyland, you don't spend the whole day on the Matterhorn. +RACHEL: What, it's ok when Chandler does it? +RACHEL: Ah, first, II would like to say thank you for agreeing to see me again. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Fine, I will. +RACHEL: No, y’know what? +RACHEL: just, don't talk. +RACHEL: Alright, I'm going to bed. +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: Big Daddy. +RACHEL: Was she old? +RACHEL: All right, listen, missy. +RACHEL: When did you go to a sperm bank? +RACHEL: Oh god look at her sleeping. +RACHEL: Hey Pheebs, can I talk to you over here for a second? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Um-hmm. +RACHEL: Yeah, I'm all set. +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Oh no, don't you apologize. +RACHEL: Well then you just must have a natural talent for it. +RACHEL: Yeah, we're gonna let you be alone. +RACHEL: That is so unfair. +RACHEL: What if she jumped out the basinet? +RACHEL: I love him, I love him, I love him. +RACHEL: She dropped off a casserole? +RACHEL: I'm gonna throw this away, but thank you so much for the gesture! +RACHEL: Bye house! +RACHEL: This is a huge deal! +RACHEL: Oh we-we didn’t. +RACHEL: I didn't know you guys hung out. +RACHEL: Oh…oh-oh-oh… Can you believe this is already happening? +RACHEL: Well, so, now, do you guys have a lot of big plans? +RACHEL: What is this? +RACHEL: Maybe she hasn’t really thought it through that well. +RACHEL: I got it! +RACHEL: I’m gonna push this baby out! +RACHEL: Hey, Dave! +RACHEL: Can I have another one? +RACHEL: And don’t you say, No, I didn’t! +RACHEL: What are you doing? +RACHEL: It is a room separating apparatus from Colonial times. +RACHEL: No, I got this all under control. +RACHEL: Shhh. +RACHEL: You were gonna drink the fat. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: How's Ross doing? +RACHEL: Oh, you’re one of those. +RACHEL: Hey Joey, what would you do if someone that you slept with told you that she was pregnant? +RACHEL: So, uh, how was your day? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Hello, excuse me. +RACHEL: respect for anybody's privacy. +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: Gimme an ‘E!’ Gimme an ‘M!’ Gimme an ‘I!’ Gimme an ‘L!’ Gimme a ‘Y!’ What do you get? +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Oh yum! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: There's only one way I'm leaving this hotel room. +RACHEL: Time is money my friend? +RACHEL: Oh that’s nice. +RACHEL: And somewhere along the way, one of them is gonna realise what they’ve done and they’re call the whole thing off. +RACHEL: I'll go with you. +RACHEL: Listen, my mum is not bringing the baby back until nine o’ clock. +RACHEL: Ugh, tramp! +RACHEL: What did he do? +RACHEL: C'mon touch it. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: MONICA! +RACHEL: Are you gonna tell Joey?! +RACHEL: Okay, Ross, please come on! +RACHEL: Monica, why? +RACHEL: Oh boy, I just can't watch. +RACHEL: Right! +RACHEL: Look! +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Wait, what do you mean you’re getting a new brain? +RACHEL: Because then you will have to tell them what we did! +RACHEL: Okay, well that's now the third sign that I should not leave Emma. +RACHEL: Hey, thanks Ross, for taking care of all of this. +RACHEL: Well, that’s great. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I got the tickets! +RACHEL: Just a touch. +RACHEL: Hey he's wearing a sweater. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh my God, Phoebe, Pottery Barn has ripped off the design of our antique! +RACHEL: And while she like to be a star, Tony always tended bar. +RACHEL: Ok, you win. +RACHEL: Well, is Ross home? +RACHEL: Hm-m. +RACHEL: Oh, god, I know it, that I freaked you out. +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: I don’t know, maybe. +RACHEL: It’s a trifle. +RACHEL: I mean doesn't she have any y'know other stripper moms friends of her own? +RACHEL: Pheebs? +RACHEL: I think it s his cat. +RACHEL: Okay, you look in the kitchen, I will look in the back closet. +RACHEL: See, I wanna help Amy the way you guys helped me. +RACHEL: Ohh, you can say. +RACHEL: Do you have your speech? +RACHEL: I know, it's such a huge, life-altering thing. +RACHEL: Oh, my God! +RACHEL: Hey, how’s how’s the uh, miracle chair? +RACHEL: It is? +RACHEL: This Alan again? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Yeah, great, you betcha! +RACHEL: I mean we work together, so nothing could really ever happen between us, and what I would love is just to go to work on Monday, and-and never talk about this again, okay? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: They had to have that specially made?! +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: ‘Kay. +RACHEL: Why don't you wanna see Janice? +RACHEL: What’s up? +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: You're not invited to the party we're gonna. +RACHEL: I’ll meet ‘em all! +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: Ross, I told you, no. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Well, it was just something Josh said about v-necks, but you had to be there. +RACHEL: Ahhh, I think you look great! +RACHEL: Okay, Pheebs, y'know what, let's look at this objectively all right? +RACHEL: True story. +RACHEL: I, I didn't say any. +RACHEL: You guys aren't doing anything tonight, are you? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Will you please come feel this?! +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Ok you guys, there’s Danny. +RACHEL: Hi, Joey! +RACHEL: Ross, look, I know that some of this stuff is out there, but I mean, come on, look at this, look at this sweater! +RACHEL: So uh, heard you had some fun with Tag last night. +RACHEL: I think that bitch cracked my tooth. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Oh, that's um, interesting. +RACHEL: You can go pee! +RACHEL: You gotta see these latest pictures of Emma. +RACHEL: Oh c'mon Joey, we care about you. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Well I can do whatever I want! +RACHEL: Hi, sweetie. +RACHEL: What the hell you doin' with my bra? +RACHEL: I KNOW! +RACHEL: Why aren't you guys at the movie? +RACHEL: I just, it was awful. +RACHEL: I mean, we were, we were going out then, now I think it’s weird. +RACHEL: Oh, sorry! +RACHEL: Ross, please, I found the magazines! +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: Well no brush! +RACHEL: I would love to! +RACHEL: That’s all right. +RACHEL: Oh uh-uh pal! +RACHEL: Oh but he did say that they found the grandmother wandering down fifth avenue. +RACHEL: Okay, I'm stopping now. +RACHEL: Ohh, that is it! +RACHEL: He was thoughtful and mature. +RACHEL: I hate to think what this woman was scratching when this broke off. +RACHEL: Mon? +RACHEL: I won't, but whatever. +RACHEL: Hey roomie! +RACHEL: I. II don’t mean. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Wait honey, so what did you do that made dad cut you off? +RACHEL: Maybe! +RACHEL: We were both out there kissing. +RACHEL: Well, Phoebe set me up on a date. +RACHEL: Aaah. +RACHEL: Oh my God, what happened? +RACHEL: So, can I serve you a little of, What? +RACHEL: Ahh, I don’t believe you. +RACHEL: I really,I’mI’m happy. +RACHEL: Wow, it is hot in here. +RACHEL: Hey Ross! +RACHEL: I don't get this! +RACHEL: No Joey, look. +RACHEL: Oh no what if he marries her too?! +RACHEL: Uh, put your elbow in it. +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: Well that’s pretty much all that we have—Oh! +RACHEL: Was it the, Please don’t show me another picture of a trilobite vibe? +RACHEL: Ok. Yeah! +RACHEL: Huh? +RACHEL: Well, however great she was I just can’t afford that. +RACHEL: It’s all good! +RACHEL: We can help each other out! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Pheebs, I, there isn't gonna be any flying about! +RACHEL: Ben just said hi. +RACHEL: Hey, wait a minute! +RACHEL: Let's dry 'em again. +RACHEL: Ross, hi. +RACHEL: Ok. +RACHEL: Well, Joshua’s coming in tomorrow and since I don’t have the guts to ask him out, I’m going to sell him a coat and put this note in the pocket. +RACHEL: Please. +RACHEL: What is he doing here?! +RACHEL: Show time! +RACHEL: I don’t, I don’t think Phoebe really wants to come. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Why don’t you guys do something?! +RACHEL: I m sorry. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Yeah, I forget which ones. +RACHEL: All of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! +RACHEL: Then how come it is? +RACHEL: Can you please just take care of her for today? +RACHEL: Well, because of us! +RACHEL: This really gorgeous Lamauge gravy boat. +RACHEL: That’s great! +RACHEL: Please? +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: What's going on Ross? +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: Can I? +RACHEL: Is this tacky or what? +RACHEL: God, Tiffany, you smell so great! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: That’s great! +RACHEL: Umm, I said I thought you were a good kisser, and uh, and that I like your tiney-tiny touchie. +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: Pheebs, I wanna ask you something. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Hey, Mr Philips, nice suit! +RACHEL: Yeah, I do. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Hey, how are you? +RACHEL: Dear losers, Wiper blades. +RACHEL: I've got some bad news. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Emma's awake. +RACHEL: But I'm not. +RACHEL: 14? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Well you know, after about thirty or forty fights, you kinda catch on. +RACHEL: Uh, look Ross, this really isn't easy. +RACHEL: Funny, because I was just gonna go across the hall and write that on Chandler. +RACHEL: Chandler and Monica?! +RACHEL: Well umm, that one is pretty but uh, I just, I just love this fabric Sorry. +RACHEL: Are you, are you, are you sure it's ah, a new bump? +RACHEL: If I had a wish, I'd wish for three more wishes. +RACHEL: Still in love with?! +RACHEL: Oh Ross, come on. +RACHEL: I’m Rachel! +RACHEL: Y'know, I mean, he always looked familiar, but. +RACHEL: Oh well, You know, I think it's kinda really important that I go somewhere where there's sun, so I'm sort of. +RACHEL: Yeah, I. Oh, thank goodness! +RACHEL: No I know, because to be a grandmother you have to be married and have children and I don’t have any of those things. +RACHEL: So I don't go back to work for another four weeks, but we would like our nanny to start right away, so that Emma could get a chance to know her. +RACHEL: Thanks! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Hi Pheebs! +RACHEL: She’s right. +RACHEL: The puss is good! +RACHEL: Ooooooh. +RACHEL: I wanna say a disease. +RACHEL: Yeah, but that was different. +RACHEL: Ohh, kids love me. +RACHEL: I want to tell you to have a good honeymoon! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: It’s funny. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Monica and Chandler are really moving in here and I have to move out and everything is changing. +RACHEL: Ok, Chandler, Mon, there's only one bananna nut muffin left. +RACHEL: I found the hardware store all by myself! +RACHEL: A year ago. +RACHEL: Did he call? +RACHEL: I didn’t pay you the rent check. +RACHEL: What are you doing here? +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Chandler! +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Bye. +RACHEL: Phoebe, of course there is more! +RACHEL: No, it's just that uhm, it feels so good. +RACHEL: Why you guys this isn't funny, all right? +RACHEL: You were with Kenny today, weren’t you? +RACHEL: Yeah, I don't know who I was kidding. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: And umm, vintage handkerchiefs y’know ‘cause, people cry at weddings. +RACHEL: It’s gonna be okay. +RACHEL: Thank you so much! +RACHEL: Hi, hi can I help you? +RACHEL: Let me try it. +RACHEL: No, I know I don’t either, but ya know what, it’s their party, and it’s just one night. +RACHEL: Oh, Danny just went into room 217. +RACHEL: Yes, I just wanted to see you again. +RACHEL: Barry, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: I mean it was so cute, it would sit in my lap and purr all day long, and I would drag a shoestring on the ground and he would chase it! +RACHEL: How do you fix this? +RACHEL: I don’t want to do anything. +RACHEL: So now, what are you doing here? +RACHEL: And we ended up kissing! +RACHEL: Oh, I’m sorry I spoiled you’re evening. +RACHEL: Don’t say that! +RACHEL: That’s great! +RACHEL: What is the matter with you guys? +RACHEL: Huh, wow, so he's gotta be. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Okay, hi. +RACHEL: Phoebe you freaked me out. +RACHEL: Don’t kid about that! +RACHEL: Oh, I called them. +RACHEL: Um, yeah. +RACHEL: Ooh, I was soo nervous about that letter. +RACHEL: I miss that dog. +RACHEL: And now it's just. +RACHEL: That's right! +RACHEL: Oh Ross, come on! +RACHEL: Ross, um, don’t forget to get a shot of Emma’s cake. +RACHEL: Ohh, I would love too. +RACHEL: Oh, y'know, it’s just like hats, and a shirt, and CD’s, just sort of stuff that you’ve left here. +RACHEL: Hey, come on now! +RACHEL: Oh wait! +RACHEL: Right! +RACHEL: It just might be too hard, given the history and all that. +RACHEL: You didn't tell him, did you? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: All right, will you, will you at least tell him how hollow and unsatisfying this, dating tons of women thing is! +RACHEL: Get outta here! +RACHEL: That’s great! +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Monica? +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Gee, what?! +RACHEL: Oh, y'know what, I didn’t want cinnamon on this. +RACHEL: Yeah, and you don't mind if I call, because you only want good things for me. +RACHEL: All right here he comes. +RACHEL: I'm boredddd! +RACHEL: I'm gonna be fine. +RACHEL: A moo-point? +RACHEL: A little help here! +RACHEL: Oh, I know. +RACHEL: Well, it was good, until we got back to our apartment, and then we were fooling around and he started to put his hand up my leg and I kept slapping it away! +RACHEL: Wow man, so Joey must’ve really taught you some stuff huh? +RACHEL: Thanks for coming! +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Like a little girl. +RACHEL: I mean, it just feels right, don’t you think? +RACHEL: Go go go go, come on! +RACHEL: Oh they are nice. +RACHEL: Well, why didn’t you just take a cab? +RACHEL: Hey-hey-hey! +RACHEL: Are we moving? +RACHEL: I can’t push anymore, I can’t. +RACHEL: Awww, awww, it's beautiful. +RACHEL: Uh, no she doesn't but I can, I can get a message to her. +RACHEL: Hey, how are ya? +RACHEL: This is ridiculous. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Aaahh, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, aaaaahh. +RACHEL: I swear, I never wanted any part of your night! +RACHEL: I mean congratulations on all the cash, and-and y’know. +RACHEL: Do you even know who Kip is? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: That is really not fair that you have to fire him. +RACHEL: Super ass-kissing power. +RACHEL: You are soo irresponsible I am never letting you baby-sit ever again! +RACHEL: It's not? +RACHEL: I don't know, I mean I would give anything to work for a designer, y'know, or a buyer. +RACHEL: Cat! +RACHEL: No, no. +RACHEL: Hey sisters! +RACHEL: Wait, how long? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh, you did this to him? +RACHEL: Oh, I went to have pizza. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: How about right above the TV?. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: GOD! +RACHEL: Use me. +RACHEL: There it is. +RACHEL: Actually? +RACHEL: I mean what if she gets you a great present, two medium presents, and a bunch of little presents? +RACHEL: And besides you know what I just need to be in a room again with these people and feel good about myself. +RACHEL: Why don’t we just take me and put me with a Manhattan in my hand, talking to the cute bartender. +RACHEL: You know what I really really want? +RACHEL: You know what, it's feeling a lot better, thank you. +RACHEL: Now I don’t want people to see this tape either, but you so badly don’t people to see it makes me want to see it. +RACHEL: Ohhh! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Y’know, people should be able to sleep with who ever they want, whenever. +RACHEL: Did you go with her to Bloomingdales? +RACHEL: That makes sense. +RACHEL: Maybe all good deeds are selfish. +RACHEL: Okay, gotta go! +RACHEL: I have two sisters of my own and we just-just tortured each other. +RACHEL: Who is it? +RACHEL: Why don't I just start taking my smart pills now? +RACHEL: Phoe-be! +RACHEL: Nobody made out with him. +RACHEL: I gotta tell you, you're making it so easy on me and Emma. +RACHEL: Eh, do you believe that? +RACHEL: Maybe. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Ross, OK, if you care about me at all, you will get the pie out of the man's hood. +RACHEL: Wanna make out? +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: OK, let's play, let's play. +RACHEL: Well mainly because he's kissing that other guy. +RACHEL: Uh, thank you Phoebe. +RACHEL: You're right, you are a tough guy. +RACHEL: Good night. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: He is supposed to be here. +RACHEL: New people. +RACHEL: Ohhh! +RACHEL: Oh, the presents! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Ooh, I have another idea! +RACHEL: You're gonna sit right here. +RACHEL: I can’t tell him Phoebe. +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: You can’t just say, ‘Nice to meet you, good night?’ Well, they always called. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: And you weren't going to tell us? +RACHEL: This time it's not so funny. +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: Y’know, I wish I could get him to open up a little bit, share some feelings. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Timmy was my boyfriend and you made out with him! +RACHEL: Ohh, he's married! +RACHEL: Oh, she’s looking at me. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh, making it worse! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Get it out of here! +RACHEL: Yeah, see, there’s so much to do and I have so little time to do it in. +RACHEL: Look, y’know I know my life’s going pretty well, but I look around and I just see so many people who’ve accomplished so many other goals by the time they’re thirty. +RACHEL: Oh, it is so unfair. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: Y'know what? +RACHEL: And. +RACHEL: And I know this because, because he pretended to be Drake to, to sleep with me. +RACHEL: Yes, please. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Why don't you come with me?! +RACHEL: Umm, when were you gonna tell me that you're going out with Chip Matthews? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh wow. +RACHEL: Not unless different means the same. +RACHEL: And she's not crazy? +RACHEL: It left! +RACHEL: Oh, come on! +RACHEL: I'm the hell person whose office this is! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh thank God! +RACHEL: Ok, let me just change. +RACHEL: That’s right, still no baby! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Alright-y then. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Yeah, he's back. +RACHEL: Oh my God, you guys, whata my doin whata my doin this is so un-meee? +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: I learned a new trick! +RACHEL: It’s in such good condition. +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: I hope Monica forgives you after you throw her, her vegetarian, voodoo, goddess circley shower! +RACHEL: All right, all right, all right. +RACHEL: Are you okay? +RACHEL: It's okay! +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Well, um. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh they're in the top drawer. +RACHEL: Interesting. +RACHEL: Oh, me too. +RACHEL: I, uh, think you already are. +RACHEL: And you are a very funny clown. +RACHEL: Anyway The valentine Tommy Rollerson left in your locker was really from me. +RACHEL: So what should I tell her? +RACHEL: What's going in on in there? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Okay, bye-bye! +RACHEL: Oh, come on! +RACHEL: Gooood morning! +RACHEL: And you’re still not attracted to him at all? +RACHEL: Noooo. +RACHEL: Yes I do. +RACHEL: This is my apartment and I like it! +RACHEL: Well, you should know. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Oh no-no, no-no, they don’t want you to put your hands in the pockets until you are out of the store. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: I am still your wife! +RACHEL: Look at that, she just put her hand on his thigh. +RACHEL: It’s got all of these layers. +RACHEL: That went well. +RACHEL: I'll say. +RACHEL: Err, Central Perk is proud to present the music of Miss Phoebe Buffay. +RACHEL: I’m so sorry. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Okay honey, you do realize she only spins like that on ice. +RACHEL: Well, if anyone is keeping score, I no longer eat tuna. +RACHEL: But I’m telling you, from this moment on I swear this is strictly professional. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Hi, sweetie. +RACHEL: No, it’s Ross. +RACHEL: So? +RACHEL: Hm-mm. +RACHEL: How-how did you lose your job here? +RACHEL: I dumped him. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hang in there. +RACHEL: All right, would-would you mind just not going out with him again? +RACHEL: Because! +RACHEL: Happy birthday Grandma! +RACHEL: The Talkies! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh, name one stupid thing that is as stupid as this one! +RACHEL: Two dates in one day? +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: And you deserve that! +RACHEL: Oh no! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: It's not okay! +RACHEL: Oh yes, absolutely! +RACHEL: You're just gonna make him think that you are. +RACHEL: Oh, they're gonna really hate me over there. +RACHEL: No, I was waiting for you! +RACHEL: Where is it? +RACHEL: Oh God okay, just imagine this, The Pam. +RACHEL: I can’t, you’re a totally different person to me now. +RACHEL: Oh Joey, I’m hardly a. +RACHEL: I didn't know there were docks. +RACHEL: My new boyfriend Joshua. +RACHEL: Good bye! +RACHEL: ‘Cause I’ll do it. +RACHEL: It’s an apothecary table. +RACHEL: You mean the mom you met in Montauk. +RACHEL: Yeah, uh you-you probably need that for stamps, right? +RACHEL: I don’t. +RACHEL: Oh, wait-wait-wait! +RACHEL: I mean, y'know, that girl has hair got all over head! +RACHEL: Chandler, what are you doing? +RACHEL: I don't care that you left. +RACHEL: The ring from the cave, yeah. +RACHEL: If you want this cart, you're gonna have to take me with it! +RACHEL: Amy! +RACHEL: It was really, great! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Hey, who's this little naked guy? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You wanna see me self-defend myself?! +RACHEL: Ooh, the gift shop! +RACHEL: I don't know, I don’t know what happened, I must be nervous! +RACHEL: I can't believe this is happening. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: And to get me out my mom had to-had to cut a big chunk of my hair! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I am so hot! +RACHEL: Okay, y'know what? +RACHEL: And I didn't get the other job. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I haven’t told him I’m pregnant yet. +RACHEL: Let's not drink it here. +RACHEL: Did you see that? +RACHEL: Please, Ross, you-you got hurt playing badminton with my dad. +RACHEL: Older? +RACHEL: It's probably not as bad as it sounds but this friend of mine is, is getting a cat with his girlfriend. +RACHEL: Noo! +RACHEL: Hey Mon, what are you doing now? +RACHEL: All that matters is that you look so handsome. +RACHEL: I wanna talk about that interview. +RACHEL: You don't think a woman can do this? +RACHEL: It means it's healing! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Hey Mon? +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: Okay, you want me to stop at the ATM? +RACHEL: Shoot! +RACHEL: I’m apartment hunting. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Hey, Sophie! +RACHEL: You have a play date with a stripper?! +RACHEL: I can't kiss anyone. +RACHEL: Arghhhh! +RACHEL: Ok, not that you need it but good. +RACHEL: Oh wait, no-no-no! +RACHEL: All right, bye-bye. +RACHEL: Wait a minute, it's been a long time that I've been single. +RACHEL: Yeah, but it’s okay, because when Ross left Mark came over. +RACHEL: I told you we're Joanna's two assistants. +RACHEL: Am I going to let you watch me undress? +RACHEL: Ha ha ha, third time this week. +RACHEL: Well, then you'd better keep it away from Ross's hair. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I’ve never lived like this before. +RACHEL: Hey, who's this little naked guy? +RACHEL: Smart? +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: Excuse me, sir. +RACHEL: You got. +RACHEL: Hey, honey! +RACHEL: Well, okay. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: You put holes in my baby's ears! +RACHEL: Okay Bobby, why don’t we just come over here and let them have a little moment. +RACHEL: Y'know what you should do? +RACHEL: I’m just not up for it tonight. +RACHEL: Well lets see. +RACHEL: No, I’ll think about it. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh, well okay. +RACHEL: But mom, I really know what I’m doing. +RACHEL: I did those things because I was in love with you! +RACHEL: Oh, God, ask them what they want. +RACHEL: Who the hell is Emily, noooo! +RACHEL: I, just one phone call, I'll be very quick, I'll even pay for it myself. +RACHEL: Ahh. +RACHEL: Listen umm, I need you to perform another wedding. +RACHEL: That's why we're always saying Terry's a jerk! +RACHEL: Um, hum. +RACHEL: Oh, that is so. +RACHEL: Well, yeah, y’know how Ross and I were on again, off again, on again, off again? +RACHEL: Oh, hon can you grab me my other box of tissues? +RACHEL: Let's just all go in at the same time. +RACHEL: Do you think I can't see you in the TV set? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: You know with Paulo, that all there was, was heat. +RACHEL: What, isn't he sober? +RACHEL: Ross, get in here! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I mean that’s crazy. +RACHEL: I just got back on the plane. +RACHEL: This is so exciting! +RACHEL: You are in our apartment all the time! +RACHEL: You think so? +RACHEL: Doing it. +RACHEL: We'll just use them to stop the bleeding. +RACHEL: Do you guys have to go to the new house right away, or do you have some time? +RACHEL: And uh, and that your-your dog’s name is Wally. +RACHEL: You know, Ross, just keep making your jokes. +RACHEL: I love you, and I will call you the minute I get to Paris. +RACHEL: It is not fine! +RACHEL: I mean, we're crossing that line, sort of a big thing. +RACHEL: I mean it’ll be dry, but people will like it. +RACHEL: Hey, this is hollow. +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: Pheebs, the ceiling tiles were falling down. +RACHEL: I'mI'm telling you he's really sweet and he's really funny and he's just ugh, got a good heart. +RACHEL: Well in High School, that added up to head cheerleader. +RACHEL: There it is, I see it. +RACHEL: Never-never mind. +RACHEL: Yeah Pheebs, honey, she just got engaged a couple of hours ago. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Umm, Chandler, you do realize that those ideas are probably already in Monica's head. +RACHEL: No, come on, that is a lie. +RACHEL: Hmm. +RACHEL: Although, I have a hint of morning sickness, and I’m wearing underwear that goes up to about……there. +RACHEL: I can't believe he remembered! +RACHEL: Sick-sick-sick-sick. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Because she hates Pottery Barn. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Like what Monica? +RACHEL: Come on, just answer the question! +RACHEL: Chip! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: That's OK! +RACHEL: I said it's still nap time. +RACHEL: Just so you know, it's not that common! +RACHEL: You can’t, because of the new skylight! +RACHEL: I don't want to look at another guy, I don't' want to think about another guy, I don't even want to be near another guy. +RACHEL: Okay, do you remember all that stuff I taught you yesterday? +RACHEL: But, what you and I have is so much better. +RACHEL: Oh wow! +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: Uh, I'm a uh, chef at a restaurant uptown. +RACHEL: Why?! +RACHEL: Uh, to Stephanie Schiffer. +RACHEL: Listen. +RACHEL: I hate that! +RACHEL: I’ll really appreciate it. +RACHEL: I was just getting him to like you. +RACHEL: Yeah it is. +RACHEL: Monica. +RACHEL: Be true to what you believe in! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: 'Cause this is where I wanna be, okay? +RACHEL: I mean, this is what my life is gonna be like. +RACHEL: And so then I realized. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh, I know what this is! +RACHEL: if you don’t get that. +RACHEL: After the birth of our first secret child?! +RACHEL: What are you doing here? +RACHEL: I mean, it's you, ya know, it's us. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: You and your stupid fear. +RACHEL: Kind? +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: I love you. +RACHEL: I’m telling ya, you’re gonna be dancing at my wedding before you’re dancing at there’s. +RACHEL: Well be careful with her, she’s really tiny. +RACHEL: Oh, Barry.! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I thought we were savin' that for the Pope! +RACHEL: Yes, you are. +RACHEL: Who are you saying check too? +RACHEL: No its really okay… Monica! +RACHEL: I could not have done this without you. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Hey-hey-hey, I'm Rachel! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: A break from us. +RACHEL: You agreed to buy that boat, all right?! +RACHEL: I hate being alone this time of year! +RACHEL: I can throw wet paper towels here! +RACHEL: It was the weirdest thing. +RACHEL: And a crappy New Year. +RACHEL: I’ve fallen down! +RACHEL: Yeah and you stretch ‘em out with your big old clown feet. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Here’s a good one. +RACHEL: See? +RACHEL: Oh God, we're just so excited that you want to get this apartment! +RACHEL: Because he's stealing from me! +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: It's too late! +RACHEL: That is the Coast Guard. +RACHEL: Are you in there? +RACHEL: While you were talking! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Y'know what, I want you to leave! +RACHEL: Bishop Tutu actually had to stop and shush them. +RACHEL: Whoa-oh, what's-what's that? +RACHEL: I can’t do this. +RACHEL: What are you thankful for? +RACHEL: Together? +RACHEL: I can’t see it! +RACHEL: Oh, TOES! +RACHEL: Oh gosh! +RACHEL: Oh, well, you're not catching me on my best day. +RACHEL: Yeah, seriously coz this is really heavy. +RACHEL: Look at her. +RACHEL: Well. +RACHEL: Let me get my checkbook! +RACHEL: Yeah, me neither. +RACHEL: You can hate me if you want, but please do not punish him. +RACHEL: You guys have such problems! +RACHEL: Oh, oh Ross, oh my God, are you okay? +RACHEL: Oh God, you saw me?! +RACHEL: Oh, wait a minute though. +RACHEL: Well, you’ve been here for two months now and your boss is required to hand in a performance evaluation. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh my gosh, wow. +RACHEL: No Ross! +RACHEL: All right, fine. +RACHEL: You gonna be very proud of me. +RACHEL: Ooh! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh thank you! +RACHEL: I am here to take care of you! +RACHEL: I know it’s really shallow, but a part of me wants him again. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: For me? +RACHEL: Talk to you later. +RACHEL: It’s a different guy! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Honey, I'm sorry, but he's right. +RACHEL: I am telling you what not to do! +RACHEL: I’m very sorry, but that is just the way that I feel. +RACHEL: You too. +RACHEL: Oh no, it's still nap time. +RACHEL: It has been in my head all day long. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Well then how come you're still at a job that you hate, I mean why don't you quit and get 'the fear'? +RACHEL: I know you probably think that this is all about what I said the other day about you making love with your socks on, but it isn't, it isn't, it's about me, and I ju Hi, machine cut me off again, anyway. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Thank God! +RACHEL: Just act like everything around you turns you on. +RACHEL: Okay, they are. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Uhh, let's just stay clear of 'I'm the guy that's doing you daughter' and you should be ok. Well those are very popular frames. +RACHEL: What the hell was that?! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: And please tell her to bring a cake! +RACHEL: Hi Pheebs! +RACHEL: May fifth, why? +RACHEL: Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica. +RACHEL: Oh, God. +RACHEL: Why, when did you get out of the game? +RACHEL: That was different! +RACHEL: It's so complicated. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: I don't know, I don't know, I mean maybe it's just being here at the beach together or, I don't know. +RACHEL: Oh you missed it. +RACHEL: That was you?! +RACHEL: Ow ow ow. +RACHEL: Two can play at this game. +RACHEL: Hey, I hear you don't have to go to London. +RACHEL: Okay, check it out, Thursday night, five tickets, Calvin Klein lingerie show, and you guys are coming with me. +RACHEL: No, I'm not saying I want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying I am a ha It's a metaphor, Daddy! +RACHEL: You're my sister and uh, if it really means that much to you. +RACHEL: Thank you very much. +RACHEL: Ooooh! +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: No, that's ridiculous. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: I mean d you think. +RACHEL: Any word on the apartment yet? +RACHEL: Yeah, who's gonna eat all our food, and tie up our phone lines, and - is that my bra? +RACHEL: And I put a little PostIt on it that said, Must go out today, and underlined today three times and, and then I put a little heart in the corner because I didn’t want to seem to bossy. +RACHEL: Let’s use this brush. +RACHEL: Hey, come on now! +RACHEL: The apple of my eye. +RACHEL: You don't mind do ya? +RACHEL: That's my bubby! +RACHEL: II just cannot believe that you ate that so that I wouldn’t feel bad! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I did not see the piece of Styrofoam that was shaped like Mike Tyson! +RACHEL: And I would like them to bond. +RACHEL: Ok. Ok. O-k. Ok. whoo, ok, wow, ok. OH! +RACHEL: Right! +RACHEL: Phoebe no! +RACHEL: Oh, well thank you for taking your tongue out of my sister’s mouth long enough to tell me that. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, check it. +RACHEL: Monica, I'm your best friend. +RACHEL: Contraction! +RACHEL: Did you hear that?! +RACHEL: Could you just stand up please? +RACHEL: I don’t see it! +RACHEL: Ok, I, I hear what you're sayin'. +RACHEL: Because, I wanted to hurt you. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: OH MY GOD! +RACHEL: Gone! +RACHEL: Ross, no! +RACHEL: Honey, that's you're name. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Mine too. +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Now you're probably going to hire one of the people who did not ah, who did, who did not umm, yell at you and storm out, and I think that's a big mistake and here's why. +RACHEL: That’s ridiculous! +RACHEL: I mean, I have a Malibu Barbi that will no longer be wearing white to her wedding. +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: Oh it was amazing. +RACHEL: You know, and I, want him to hook up with lots of women! +RACHEL: Y’know your friends invite you to a slumber party and then they stick your hand in warm water while you’re sleeping so that you pee in your sleeping bag. +RACHEL: Oh, maybe I should just forget about it. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: I got under him. +RACHEL: Ow, you stop flicking. +RACHEL: Of course, of course. +RACHEL: Did you really just shake your fist in the air and shout, I will be revenged?! +RACHEL: Well, things change. +RACHEL: And? +RACHEL: I’m sorry! +RACHEL: I'm not. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Ross. +RACHEL: All right, I’llI’ll take it again when I get home. +RACHEL: You know it was you're uhm, birthday. +RACHEL: Uh, they gave me cute doctor today and in the middle of the exam I put my pinky in his chin dimple. +RACHEL: Come on you and me, we'll-we'll start a new group, we're the best ones. +RACHEL: It’s for me! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I got the inside track! +RACHEL: Oh yeah well, you know me, babies, responsibilities, ahhh! +RACHEL: Well, it would be easier to move just right across the hall. +RACHEL: Look, we appreciate all the advice, but this is between Joey and me and I think we can handle it. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: Wi, in the dres, in the dressing room!? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I went to the zoo yesterday and now I'm a koala bear. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: But I can turn that around! +RACHEL: You said, you said bye to me. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: If I have a heart attack in a restaurant, I want you there with your fossil brush. +RACHEL: I don’t think he’s the one I’m sad about. +RACHEL: Look at that! +RACHEL: OK put your hands back there. +RACHEL: Ooh, I can do that. +RACHEL: What do you mean, handling it? +RACHEL: Oh that’s right! +RACHEL: Umm here. +RACHEL: Ahh, so do you, beautiful. +RACHEL: Ooh, Julie's so smart, Julie's so special. +RACHEL: Listen, I was um, thinkin' about. +RACHEL: All right, that's it, you guys! +RACHEL: Uh-hmm. +RACHEL: What are you doing here? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: You guys ever heard the story about when Ross's mom went to the beauty salon? +RACHEL: Well it stupid, unfair question! +RACHEL: Oh come on you guys! +RACHEL: Ok, so uh, who wants the last hamburger? +RACHEL: How come you never offered this before? +RACHEL: Y'know what Chandler, you got yourself into those cuffs, you get yourself out of them. +RACHEL: Well, we were just talkin’ about you guys gettin’ married and how great it is. +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Well, why don't you talk to me about it, maybe I can help. +RACHEL: What’s your favourite thing about summertime? +RACHEL: I don't like guys with boring jobs. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I didn’t mean to stifle you. +RACHEL: Oh oh wait! +RACHEL: I cannot do this with my left hand! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Wha, forget it Ross, no, I am not gonna stand here and make a list of. +RACHEL: Honey, seriously, I did it all. +RACHEL: Close call day. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh yeah, what department was that? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Well, he didn’t say, but it was a fire. +RACHEL: Phoebe, what's the matter? +RACHEL: Go-go! +RACHEL: Look I know she's a little tough to take. +RACHEL: Oh man! +RACHEL: I’m ready. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Please, drinking no liquids around the invitations Rachel! +RACHEL: You are never going to believe what happened to me today. +RACHEL: So, farm birds, huh? +RACHEL: I’ll do it. +RACHEL: I'm gonna go to Paris. +RACHEL: What is the matter with you?! +RACHEL: Ball? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: They wanna know if I'm okay. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: It’s the same story. +RACHEL: None for me. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh my God you’re here, let me see your hand! +RACHEL: We do not have a diaper service! +RACHEL: Oh, it’s a tattoo! +RACHEL: I don't know why Joey had to kiss her! +RACHEL: There is a little part of me that really thought we were gonna win. +RACHEL: He’s coming over! +RACHEL: Coffee black. +RACHEL: Burning's good. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: She's ok, I just don't get a really good vibe from her! +RACHEL: Oh, Joey, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: You know, she just wants them all! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Can any of you watch Emma? +RACHEL: You can go fishin’! +RACHEL: Sure we should. +RACHEL: That would be great! +RACHEL: But you said that you liked him! +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: This is so awesome! +RACHEL: Oh God Monica hi! +RACHEL: Ugh. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: I am! +RACHEL: Umm, hand-hand me those cherries. +RACHEL: I am over you and that, my friend, is what they call closure. +RACHEL: Oh Daddy, no he didn't mean anything by that, he really didn't. +RACHEL: Oh I just wish we could not be married for a little bit! +RACHEL: Hopefully across the street if certain Dutch people would just let go. +RACHEL: You’re gonna leave this person with me?! +RACHEL: That's all, I just wish I could share that with a guy. +RACHEL: And, ah, then we had a little, um, eye-contact. +RACHEL: I do know! +RACHEL: Don't get too comfortable there, because I'm back in two weeks! +RACHEL: These are from Halloween three years ago. +RACHEL: Ross, you're ok with all this? +RACHEL: You don't even know me! +RACHEL: What happened? +RACHEL: Oh, you got me. +RACHEL: Happy Thanksgiving! +RACHEL: Allll done! +RACHEL: Well, y'know, if-if kids like to play with Capri pants. +RACHEL: I have to do this to her? +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: But I mean that's a classic, what's so great about The Shining? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Look! +RACHEL: Joey, where are those bags? +RACHEL: I try. +RACHEL: Some of them. +RACHEL: Ready! +RACHEL: I cannot get on a plane without one! +RACHEL: I can not believe he would do that to Mon—Whoa! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I do not care what my hormones are doing, I am not going to just do it with some random guy! +RACHEL: You know, with the right pair of pumps, that would be a great little outfit! +RACHEL: Oh sure. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Sweety. +RACHEL: Look at her, she's even got waitress experience. +RACHEL: Last weekend, I went from store to store sitting on Santa’s lap. +RACHEL: Are you uh… How did umm… When? +RACHEL: Julie, isn't that great? +RACHEL: All right, all right. +RACHEL: Well there's this little bone we didn't know it had!' +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: Joey, you’re gonna have to stop rushing me, you know what? +RACHEL: Joey, honey, I don’t think you’re supposed to go back there. +RACHEL: Wait, wait, wait. +RACHEL: Here's the thing: lately I have been having thoughts musings, if you will! +RACHEL: All right, let’s get this party started, huh? +RACHEL: This is gonna, this is gonna sound y’know, a little umm, hasty, but uh, just go with it. +RACHEL: Your funny Chandler! +RACHEL: You seem to really like her. +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: Cramp, cramp. +RACHEL: I got nice boobs. +RACHEL: It's just occurring to you? +RACHEL: Oh, come on! +RACHEL: So all we have is ice? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: III didn't! +RACHEL: I just can’t. +RACHEL: What, so I can't lokk nice? +RACHEL: That had to hurt. +RACHEL: You are not still going over that thing. +RACHEL: Look! +RACHEL: I’m just glad we didn’t do anything stupid. +RACHEL: What are we feeding this baby?! +RACHEL: We’re paying for this y’know. +RACHEL: They’re not! +RACHEL: No.he said we were holding up the people behind us. +RACHEL: They’re pushing! +RACHEL: You-you got the job! +RACHEL: Awww, no, it's okay, we've actually known for a while. +RACHEL: I mean, what are you guys going to talk about? +RACHEL: You guys are gonna love meee! +RACHEL: Oh, umm when-when Monica and Chandler got engaged I started putting some stuff together, y’know just in case. +RACHEL: Right before I went into labor, we-we had this kiss. +RACHEL: Don’t leave me here with these people. +RACHEL: Interesting. +RACHEL: Well that was umm. +RACHEL: All right, look, we did not know that you wanted a stripper so we went to the phonebook and we got the first name we could find! +RACHEL: Sorry, Mr. Paul? +RACHEL: I mean, am I sending you these signals right now? +RACHEL: And umm, and finally when I thought you were making sexual advances in the workplace, I said no and I was not litigious. +RACHEL: I'm Rachel Greep! +RACHEL: Well. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I’m glad we got that all straightened out. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Let me, let me check. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Joey. +RACHEL: I love it. +RACHEL: You were right, this was just not worth it. +RACHEL: I mean, you know, we've never really talked. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Hey, remember how last night we were talking about that movie Cujo? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh, seriously? +RACHEL: Yes, you did. +RACHEL: But ah, you're safe from it if it's in the freezer? +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh wow. +RACHEL: So, did you quit? +RACHEL: I got my hair coloured! +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: That is hard to say. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: That’s just my Chinese food! +RACHEL: Oh honey thank God you’re home, I was getting worried. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: What do you do? +RACHEL: Oh, I forgot this was in here. +RACHEL: I was really freaked out too when I found out… Y’know what? +RACHEL: I went down there just like you said, y'know? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Thanks you guys! +RACHEL: Barry who I almost. +RACHEL: Ross, come here. +RACHEL: I’ll fix this. +RACHEL: All right this is about, umm, people feeling certain things y'know about strippers. +RACHEL: Oh yay! +RACHEL: Hmm-mmm. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Can we please keep the chicken and the turkey and everything on the other side of the table? +RACHEL: Oh my God Ross, no, hang up the phone, give me the phone Ross, give me the phone, give me the phone, give me the. +RACHEL: Careful. +RACHEL: Not girl! +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: That's what we decided. +RACHEL: And the um, waiter came over and cut his tip in half, and umm…now here we are. +RACHEL: Well, well, you said it was practice! +RACHEL: Yeah, I’m not so sure. +RACHEL: Okay, that was about seven seconds. +RACHEL: Hey, did you guys check out those new handdryers in the bathroom? +RACHEL: Absolutely. +RACHEL: I mean, why can't parents just stay parents? +RACHEL: They're my new 'I don't need a job, I don't need my parents, I've got great boots' boots! +RACHEL: Look at that, oh, stays on and everything. +RACHEL: Look! +RACHEL: Oh, maybe that's Emily calling back to leave the exact same message. +RACHEL: Come on Phoebe! +RACHEL: You're stuck with me! +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah sure! +RACHEL: There is a plan! +RACHEL: We won't? +RACHEL: What's the big deal? +RACHEL: Good luck. +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah, I was just about to take a break anyways, so. +RACHEL: Oh, wow. +RACHEL: No we. +RACHEL: It was after the Sigma Chi luau and Melissa and I got very drunk! +RACHEL: I can't! +RACHEL: I can't see you either. +RACHEL: OK. OK. Can we change the subject, please? +RACHEL: OK. Any of you guys want anything else? +RACHEL: And uh-oh, here it comes again. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Not me, not me, not me, not me, not me! +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Well, ultimately, I was trying y'know, II wanted to tell him y'know, that I'm still in love with him. +RACHEL: Ohh we’re not sailing. +RACHEL: climax your way to better skin. +RACHEL: Well, get back in there and talk! +RACHEL: Oh, okay. +RACHEL: Come feel my belly! +RACHEL: Hey Mon, let’s give Pete a chance Come on, he was funny, he seems really nice, and that check thing was adorable. +RACHEL: You must end it, you must end it now! +RACHEL: Well maybe he saw your hand slip briefly from the ten and two o’clock position. +RACHEL: What do you think Monica mean when she said she didn’t want to talk, especially with me? +RACHEL: I think I'm gonna be sick. +RACHEL: When somebody does not buzz you in, Ross, that means go away. +RACHEL: I hate that singing guy! +RACHEL: Oh, look at the little cat! +RACHEL: Or maybe you would see me looking embarrassed because you are talking on the phone with your crotch! +RACHEL: I’ve read all kinds of books on pregnancy and giving birth, but II just didn’t think to read the part about what to do when the baby comes. +RACHEL: Your mother is up in heaven going, 'Where the hell is my lily, you wuss?' +RACHEL: So, if-if I mess this up, there’s nothing else for dessert? +RACHEL: I cannot believe her. +RACHEL: fascist. +RACHEL: What’s the other one? +RACHEL: Hi Russ, I've just got two more tables to clean and then we'll go, OK. Hi. +RACHEL: Oh there is no way. +RACHEL: Er Rossss? +RACHEL: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monica’s photo albums, I mean you don’t do that if you’re just in it for two weeks. +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Joey relax! +RACHEL: Come on. +RACHEL: Absolutely! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Ooh, absolutely. +RACHEL: I know it’s a terrible thing to even think this, and it’s completely inappropriate, but I want you to be at my constant beck and call 24 hours a day! +RACHEL: How was she? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: No it’s not! +RACHEL: Three people. +RACHEL: Okay, oh, here's what you do. +RACHEL: Hey, Monica! +RACHEL: I have to go home. +RACHEL: Well, y’know. +RACHEL: Nooo. +RACHEL: Well, now, wait a second. +RACHEL: And it’s probably really hard for you to be alone right now. +RACHEL: I just want you to take me and kiss me and make love to me right here, right now. +RACHEL: I will not! +RACHEL: Hi-e! +RACHEL: Light. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Do you really not know where I’m going with this? +RACHEL: Can we not talk about it please? +RACHEL: Nothing! +RACHEL: All right, now I’m gonna do this my way and I don’t want to hear a peep out of you! +RACHEL: If you can't handle this, what are you going to be like in the hospital? +RACHEL: Forgot my purse! +RACHEL: I don't have any! +RACHEL: Well, I haven’t discussed it with him yet, but I know he’s gonna be relieved. +RACHEL: Okay, now make it even, ‘cause we don’t. +RACHEL: Well, so what does he do? +RACHEL: Well, why shouldn’t I be? +RACHEL: And I- and also, it's an extra seat around the coffee table. +RACHEL: I have absolutely no idea. +RACHEL: Mr. Treeger. +RACHEL: But I couldn’t even if I wanted to, because I don’t know! +RACHEL: Oh nothing I… Sorry, I just can’t stop crying. +RACHEL: Care for a cherry? +RACHEL: Man, don't be surprised if her hands and her feet get bigger too! +RACHEL: Oh, thanks. +RACHEL: Anyway, there’s this big charity ball this weekend and Ralph Lauren bought a table, so I kinda have to go. +RACHEL: Hey-hey, now this was no one’s fault Pheebs. +RACHEL: See look Amy, we're a lot closer to Monica and Chandler. +RACHEL: Me neither. +RACHEL: That’s Kenny the copy guy. +RACHEL: I didn’t want him to start yelling at me like I was some ’74 Latour. +RACHEL: Oh good. +RACHEL: My mom’s not gonna be here?! +RACHEL: Although. +RACHEL: Relax! +RACHEL: No, no-no-no Joey he doesn’t want to buy my baby! +RACHEL: And I still have about five seconds to spare. +RACHEL: Mom! +RACHEL: Oh, I'm so sorry. +RACHEL: Amy kept kicking me in her sleep yelling ‘Myron, get off!’ Joey, I can’t do that! +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: Do you want some pancakes? +RACHEL: Hi Dr. Long, how are you? +RACHEL: I'm sorry, good luck! +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh, everything okay with the waiter? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh Phoebe, listen. +RACHEL: You knew that our hot, sweaty, writhing bodies were. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh come on answer it! +RACHEL: Nothing. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: It's too scary! +RACHEL: Anyway, Ralph just came in to tell me that he’s so happy with my work that he wants me to be the new merchandising manager for polo retail. +RACHEL: But it’s actually for Joshua. +RACHEL: I accidentally kissed him in the interview, and now he wants me back y'know of course, 'cause Let's bring the girl back who kisses everybody! +RACHEL: Ooh, I know! +RACHEL: I'm feeling kinda crazy. +RACHEL: I knew that! +RACHEL: What are you doing?! +RACHEL: You do? +RACHEL: Y’know, I can tie one of these into a knot using just my tongue. +RACHEL: We can get-what are those-those patches! +RACHEL: Oh, thanks. +RACHEL: I think they're very nice. +RACHEL: Why the voice. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Do you want me to quit? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Y'know who I always liked? +RACHEL: She just made a scene in the middle of the ceremony! +RACHEL: Ah, why, now I can't get a massage? +RACHEL: We are not, going to let it be a problem. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: OK, thank you. +RACHEL: He was like a, like a bigfoot or a yeti or something! +RACHEL: Oo! +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Wh-what’s that? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: We also kissed in Barbados. +RACHEL: Oh, I think I’m gonna throw up a little bit. +RACHEL: Oh well, you don't want to do that now?! +RACHEL: That is enough! +RACHEL: I’m fine here. +RACHEL: Yeah, he thought he broke your chair so he switched the chairs! +RACHEL: If-if you get me something from the car. +RACHEL: None. +RACHEL: Ok, you know what, lemme, let me just see what else I can do. +RACHEL: Please, sit down. +RACHEL: Oops sorry, my mistake. +RACHEL: Umm, why do you have a copy of The Shining in your freezer? +RACHEL: Well, yeah, this is the deal. +RACHEL: What changed? +RACHEL: Oh, yeah go ahead. +RACHEL: Well, I, umm. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: That was barely an experience! +RACHEL: Wait, I’m not just gonna drink somebody’s old coffee. +RACHEL: Too sensitive to take care of our baby? +RACHEL: Let me tell you about a couple of things I learned while working at the coffeehouse. +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Oh, okay. +RACHEL: I'll be right there! +RACHEL: Well, it wasn't very good for me either. +RACHEL: Be home. +RACHEL: And then, they slid up, and then, they were in my hair. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Okay, but taking care of a drunk, naked woman seems like a job for Joey. +RACHEL: February 2nd! +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: Very funny, come here! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: This is, this is insane. +RACHEL: Well, now I don't have to. +RACHEL: Well. +RACHEL: I've gotta get off this plane. +RACHEL: Oh, she's coming up! +RACHEL: I’m not you. +RACHEL: Huh? +RACHEL: What thing? +RACHEL: Oh my-ugh! +RACHEL: You don’t want to win an award this way. +RACHEL: All right, you know what? +RACHEL: Ohh, Lilies. +RACHEL: Why?! +RACHEL: I just fell right off the couch there. +RACHEL: Phoebe, you were right. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Ross honey, this is very nice, but, but II got a crisis. +RACHEL: Y’know, I gotta tell ya, this really does put in a better mood. +RACHEL: Ha! +RACHEL: Don’t look at it. +RACHEL: I’ve come up with a bunch of ideas! +RACHEL: That's it! +RACHEL: Oh my God Phoebe! +RACHEL: I mean, mittens are nice! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: She wants to move in with me and Ross to help take care of the baby. +RACHEL: Please, make sure she comes. +RACHEL: I bet you're right. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah! +RACHEL: Op. +RACHEL: Even if people are on it! +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: Okay, let’s turn out all the lights and we’ll just watch the movie! +RACHEL: We feel so terrible about this, Ross. +RACHEL: Ross, you got that for free from the museum gift shop. +RACHEL: Why's he getting all my money? +RACHEL: Oh it’s important! +RACHEL: Oh, hey, I have an idea. +RACHEL: The 1996 Tony award winner. +RACHEL: Monica, number one, I don't think Ben understands the concept of bribery, and number two, I. +RACHEL: Shall we? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Well, I'm sorry I'm not going to an eye doctor! +RACHEL: And you gave the baby Hugsy! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I have to go to the bathroom. +RACHEL: No, come on, I'm totally ok. +RACHEL: I just figured as a grownup I wouldn't have to worry about this. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: It’s an apothecary table. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Yeah okay, you laugh now, but she’s gonna be yours. +RACHEL: And then he uh…well I probably shouldn’t tell you the rest. +RACHEL: You seem to really like her. +RACHEL: Very nice touch. +RACHEL: What’s up Mon? +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Oh, I know it. +RACHEL: Fine! +RACHEL: Gunther, y'know what, I am a terrible waitress, do you know why I'm a terrible waitress? +RACHEL: I mean I’m probably 98 happy, maybe 2 jealous. +RACHEL: Do you happen to know the name of that one? +RACHEL: Oh no! +RACHEL: Okay, a thousand. +RACHEL: Y'know I can’t believe I even thought about getting back together again! +RACHEL: Cut it out! +RACHEL: What Phoebe? +RACHEL: You didn’t propose to me. +RACHEL: Okay, I'm not just waitressing. +RACHEL: Ohh, what is in that? +RACHEL: Then what? +RACHEL: Well relax, he'll be here. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Ohh, I'm gonna be on the news! +RACHEL: No, I don't! +RACHEL: I love you. +RACHEL: My maternity leave just ended. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: All right, all right, you're right, I won't do anything with Joey, I just thought that we Ok so that would be two cups of tarragon, one pound of baking soda and one red onion? +RACHEL: Oh my God…. +RACHEL: Okay, in about ten seconds you’re gonna see him kiss me. +RACHEL: Adam Ritter's boxer shorts. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: All right, let’s go shoppin’! +RACHEL: Actually, what I think you said was, don't touch that, and get the hell out of my kitchen. +RACHEL: I am gonna call him right now! +RACHEL: And maybe this is a chance for you to escape getting back together with Emily? +RACHEL: You-you could have like little money place settings. +RACHEL: r huh. +RACHEL: I’m sorry! +RACHEL: It's not! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: No Phoebe! +RACHEL: Are Joey and Chandler back? +RACHEL: Excuse me? +RACHEL: Wow, this is so just the way it was supposed to be. +RACHEL: Menstrual cramps. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: He's really got that sexy, smoldering thing going on. +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: That's great! +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: She was kinda stupid. +RACHEL: You’re peeping! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: And so I had a lot of work to do so Ross, nice guy that he is, offered to help me out. +RACHEL: Yeah, right! +RACHEL: And even though I am so looking forward to the next part, I am really gonna miss being pregnant. +RACHEL: I mean, I know how much you love him! +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Oh, hey! +RACHEL: It freaks me out. +RACHEL: Oh no, my dad's a doctor and he would always tell me just horror stories, about ghosts and goblins who totally supported the princess's right to smoke. +RACHEL: And uh, and the lighting's always unflattering. +RACHEL: Ross, not alone, Julie, arm around her. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Oh, Joey! +RACHEL: Oh, come on Ross. +RACHEL: Oh, do I? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Yeah, she's. +RACHEL: It’s a tricky business isn’t it? +RACHEL: So I thought Joey and I would be okay once we hung out, but it’s not even like we know how to be with each other anymore. +RACHEL: How you doin'? +RACHEL: Alright, fine. +RACHEL: Noo! +RACHEL: Oh, but first of all, Monica, I would like to introduce you to my very talented colleage and more importantly my wonderful friend Gavin Mitchelle. +RACHEL: Oh-oh, that’s a risky little game! +RACHEL: Oh, me too. +RACHEL: Ross, you know, I've said I'm sorry, like, a million times. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Just get out! +RACHEL: Well Joey, you’ll probably get it. +RACHEL: Are you okay? +RACHEL: Tell me what to do. +RACHEL: I’m successful! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I'll help you out. +RACHEL: Ugh, you know what makes it so much worse, Ross is all happy in Vermont! +RACHEL: Well. +RACHEL: Oh, it's a gift certificate to this new SPA in SOHO. +RACHEL: We are so over! +RACHEL: So, it's pretty late, you're probably uh, not still planning on. +RACHEL: Great, shoot, what are we gonna do? +RACHEL: Oh, here you go! +RACHEL: Ooh, ooh, ooh,ooh,ooh. +RACHEL: What are you, what are you doin'? +RACHEL: Oh, oh, and Mind, y'know, if-if everything works out, and you guys end up getting married and having kids and everything I just hope they have his old hairline and your old nose. +RACHEL: This is a big deal. +RACHEL: Oh, oh. +RACHEL: You’re gonna have to tell me how you did that. +RACHEL: Ohh, my new assistant is working out, yes. +RACHEL: And two, I wasn't some creep staring at his ass, we had a deap meaningful relationship. +RACHEL: Dina has something that she wants to tell you. +RACHEL: Oh, my god. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I uh, I can't decide this. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: So, I’m in my apartment doing the Soap Opera Digest crossword puzzle, and guess who the clue is for three down. +RACHEL: I haven't heard from her in seven months, and. +RACHEL: You got lighting last time, lighting is mine! +RACHEL: Yeah, not for girls anyway. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Oh sure I am, because you always have to be right. +RACHEL: Well, why do y’know go in that room and do your homework? +RACHEL: Don't touch my coat! +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: Why, why, what's wrong with these guys? +RACHEL: You're very cheeky for a temp. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: First of all, the customer is always right. +RACHEL: What, what, so that you can dance with the woman that stole your credit card? +RACHEL: She'll be a much better friend when the market closes. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: YES. +RACHEL: I know, she says it’s all mass-produced, nothing is authentic, and everyone winds up having the same stuff. +RACHEL: I mean, tha, that's it? +RACHEL: How old was she there? +RACHEL: What’s your problem? +RACHEL: You’re never leaving the apartment! +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Are you asking me to move out? +RACHEL: I had no idea. +RACHEL: Oww! +RACHEL: It’s not like she hates you. +RACHEL: Your breasts are gonna get bigger, your ass is gonna get bigger, you're gonna lose bladder control. +RACHEL: No, but they stuck me in personal shopping. +RACHEL: I was faking it! +RACHEL: All right, okay-okay, I see, I see what's going on here! +RACHEL: Ha! +RACHEL: Why did you invite him? +RACHEL: It's very sweet. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: You know what we should all do? +RACHEL: Which is why I believe I can lure her away with these chocolates. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Yes, his name is Barry, he’s a doctor, thank you very much. +RACHEL: I can practically hear the mahjong tiles! +RACHEL: Yeah, I know. +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: There shouldn’t be all this rules and restrictions! +RACHEL: Does Ross know? +RACHEL: He’s so pretty I wanna cry! +RACHEL: What!? +RACHEL: Yes, I’ll meet ‘em. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: So I just dropped Emma off at my mom's. +RACHEL: I don’t remember him. +RACHEL: Alright, so I guess that means good night then? +RACHEL: Oh, you guys. +RACHEL: Oh right, tonight was your party. +RACHEL: No please, show me how I begged you! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Well, just because it happened that way for them doesn't mean it has to happen that way for us. +RACHEL: Have fun! +RACHEL: Oh my god. +RACHEL: I got the keys! +RACHEL: Oh, god, this is great! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: No, absolutely. +RACHEL: Oh, I wanna quit, but then I think I should stick it out, then I think why would such a person stay in such a demeaning job, just because it's remotely related to the field they're interested in. +RACHEL: I heard it, and it's ridiculous! +RACHEL: I get to serve coffee for the next 8 hours. +RACHEL: Of course your body's gonna change. +RACHEL: Well, I should be involved in that, so why don't you get me up to speed? +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: How was the game? +RACHEL: She spit up. +RACHEL: Uh, Rachel. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I am so on board! +RACHEL: Yeah, I had a tarantula when I was a kid. +RACHEL: Hit me. +RACHEL: Mona is dumping Ross. +RACHEL: I want to do this. +RACHEL: Well now it’s an empty bar. +RACHEL: Oh well… Remind me to introduce you to someone! +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Right, sorry, I'll be right back! +RACHEL: Ok. +RACHEL: Wow, I am so glad I'm not Monica right now. +RACHEL: Hey, do you guys wanna go see a movie? +RACHEL: Joey asked me marry him. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Well… That’s…y’know—That’s—We’ve been alone for the last twenty minutes we’re doing okay. +RACHEL: Okay great! +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Phoebe, it’s not Gunther. +RACHEL: I mean, do-do you think we’re ever gonna have that? +RACHEL: Anyway uh, great idea! +RACHEL: But. +RACHEL: Oh, God, you know, I know It s totally superfical, and we have nothing in common, and we don t even speak the same language, but Gohohohoddd. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: You don’t want to see this do you? +RACHEL: Let's just talk, we never just hang out and talk anymore. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie? +RACHEL: Ohh, Phoebe, what am I going to do? +RACHEL: But don’t you think Rosita would’ve wanted you to move on? +RACHEL: There you go! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Hating you! +RACHEL: Excuse me, hel, woo. +RACHEL: Umm, I just ran into Caitlin in the hallway and-and uh, you must be getting better at this flirting stuff than I thought. +RACHEL: But y’know you do wear that sweater a lot, are you involved in some kind of dare? +RACHEL: I just can't believe this! +RACHEL: Or. +RACHEL: Yeah-yeah, did-didn’t you use to have a pair? +RACHEL: Oh, I loved him in those cell phone commercials. +RACHEL: She was laughing. +RACHEL: Ross said my name. +RACHEL: Uh-hmm, uh-hmm, yeah, yeah, I really liked your hands. +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: And thank you for your time. +RACHEL: Olivia. +RACHEL: Wait, so, you're going? +RACHEL: You don’t?! +RACHEL: What do you mean you quit?! +RACHEL: Oh, well too late, sorry, you already had some. +RACHEL: Cat. +RACHEL: But, it's not raining. +RACHEL: Nice work! +RACHEL: All right, well, I’ll remember that the next time you freak out about a spider in your apartment! +RACHEL: How are you? +RACHEL: Oh, honey, I'm sure there's nothing wrong with the plane. +RACHEL: Oh, all right. +RACHEL: Ewww. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: What’s this? +RACHEL: Oh, God, oh, God, I mean it's just so. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: AND YOU KNOW! +RACHEL: It’s a very big deal, there’s a lot of people there I have to meet. +RACHEL: Well, I'll be waiting for you, just come up when you're done. +RACHEL: I’ll see you guys later. +RACHEL: Well, don’t look at me! +RACHEL: I'm done. +RACHEL: Ok. Let me put it this way. +RACHEL: They are mine! +RACHEL: Fine, but I’ll have you know that once I taught him that stuff he called me Fun Aunt Rachel. +RACHEL: I actually was gonna bring someone myself, so. +RACHEL: Y'know, you-you also could've used uh, lamps and then followed the light. +RACHEL: Yeah, no. +RACHEL: I mean that’s just gonna make her feel bad. +RACHEL: I mean, what if all we've got are, beans? +RACHEL: Well hey, you don't - you don't think they're kind of cool? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Um, this is gonna sound kinda goofy but uhhm, my friend over there, who cooks by the way, um, she thinks you're cute. +RACHEL: Don’t! +RACHEL: You heard them say that? +RACHEL: And I know that that’s dumb, but oh my God you were so depressed when Ross got married that you slept with Chandler! +RACHEL: You know, there’s other stuff. +RACHEL: Wow, so beautiful. +RACHEL: Ya know, I just, so weird. +RACHEL: Look, y'know what, either it does or it doesn't, and if you have to even think about it. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: I'm just gonna grab a jacket. +RACHEL: Uh no. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: III just think it’s wrong! +RACHEL: Do you not like them? +RACHEL: Joey, you have got to take this back! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Time’s up, now your dead. +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: Please laugh for mommy. +RACHEL: Do it! +RACHEL: You sick, sick, sick, sick-o! +RACHEL: I mean my Mom never thought this would work out. +RACHEL: Amy, you know what? +RACHEL: It's just, you're more the fun parent. +RACHEL: Give it! +RACHEL: I told you I don't! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: And the video camera? +RACHEL: He's happily married. +RACHEL: Yes? +RACHEL: Mr. Paul? +RACHEL: We can all go out to dinner, y’know? +RACHEL: Or Chandler? +RACHEL: Now wait a minute. +RACHEL: OH! +RACHEL: Ross, thank you. +RACHEL: Yeah but, he’s not your type. +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: Uh well, y'know what? +RACHEL: Oh, c'mon, I'm so much happier with you than I ever was with him. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I've done a lot of stuff. +RACHEL: Okay, that’s him! +RACHEL: Ross look, look this is good for you. +RACHEL: Like umm, oh-oh, like this dishtowel! +RACHEL: Oh, I know, I know. +RACHEL: How do you think this suit would look on an assistant buyer at Bloomingdale's? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: What are you doing here?! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: I can totally handle this on my own. +RACHEL: Indeed there isn't. +RACHEL: Oh, great, Are you gonna be ok? +RACHEL: What do you need? +RACHEL: I can you have so crossed a line. +RACHEL: I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Nooo! +RACHEL: Well, I had to give the kid fifty bucks to stop crying. +RACHEL: We. +RACHEL: But, maybe it's okay that you're not a part of it. +RACHEL: Hi you guys. +RACHEL: Unbelievable. +RACHEL: Now Joey remember, if you win you have to hug me! +RACHEL: Alright! +RACHEL: Oh yeah, they’re really great! +RACHEL: So would I. +RACHEL: What is new with you? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: That cute waiter guy from your restaurant, the one that looks like a non-threatening Ray Liotta? +RACHEL: What are people think… Oh you guys I love it. +RACHEL: I'm sorry, no. +RACHEL: Oh, you are the lesser of two evils! +RACHEL: Yeah okay. +RACHEL: Phoebe, I already, I already did. +RACHEL: Mom never gonna leave you again. +RACHEL: Wait a minute, I didn’t pay, I thought you paid! +RACHEL: All right?! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Wait. +RACHEL: Men! +RACHEL: No, I hear what you’re saying and-and-and that makes a lot of sense but can I just say one more thing? +RACHEL: Who wants to go first? +RACHEL: Come here, come here. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Get out, get out of my apartment. +RACHEL: My mom there, my dad there. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh, I know, isn't she? +RACHEL: Even so, I think I'm gonna pick Ross. +RACHEL: And, and-and then I heard myself say it and then the floating Rachel was like, You are such an idiot! +RACHEL: Chandler, can you give us a minute? +RACHEL: Are any of you guys free tonight? +RACHEL: Umm, can I use your bathroom? +RACHEL: Mon you definitely have to make it a theme wedding, and the theme could be, Look how much money we’ve got! +RACHEL: Ohh, it's Joshua invited me to this fancy club opening tonight. +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Well, someone that has his own tux, or has the ability to rent a tux. +RACHEL: Well, I guess we can all agree that's not gonna happen. +RACHEL: All right, I'm outta here! +RACHEL: Alright, now I really have to go. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: That's my boss. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Umm, I kinda got the feeling from her today that uh, she’s not lookin’ for a serious relationship. +RACHEL: He-he said Rachel, right? +RACHEL: Ok. You don t? +RACHEL: No, that was his costume. +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: I mean, I will cleeeean it. +RACHEL: Yeah, why? +RACHEL: In the afternoon. +RACHEL: All right, you guys, I kinda gotta clean up now. +RACHEL: He’s not married, or involved, with anyone! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: What, as part of your poor friends outreach program? +RACHEL: Oh I know, I'm sorry you guys. +RACHEL: I'm just sorry we don't got popcorn. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Why would you do that to her Chandler? +RACHEL: I, I don't have it. +RACHEL: Well maybe he's just taking a nap. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: It doesn’t work that way. +RACHEL: I mean——Or he does. +RACHEL: Listen, I need to. +RACHEL: We did! +RACHEL: Hmm, mild discomfort. +RACHEL: Hi there! +RACHEL: My mother sends me the engagement notices for inspiration. +RACHEL: ROSS: So, er, where did er, Paolo come from. +RACHEL: So anyway I just didn't know where to go, and I know that you and I have kinda drifted apart, but you're the only person I knew who lived here in the city. +RACHEL: I'm still pursuing that. +RACHEL: Okay, remember uh, remember how you told me that your grandmother put up that wall to make that into two bedrooms? +RACHEL: It’s so secluded up here. +RACHEL: Oh, well maybe there was a dog lookin' at him. +RACHEL: That's what you want? +RACHEL: Wait a minute. +RACHEL: And I mean we-we’re having this baby together, and we live together. +RACHEL: Okay, Phoebe, honey, you gotta be kidding. +RACHEL: Look at me, I’m having such a wonderful time! +RACHEL: So I would like to raise my glass to Monica and Chandler and the beautiful adventure they are about to embark upon together. +RACHEL: Terrible? +RACHEL: This could be the simple wedding you've always wanted! +RACHEL: Ohh, thank you for the wonderful dinner. +RACHEL: Oh, I gotta get my ticket! +RACHEL: You did not drop any socks! +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: Like that time you and I got married! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Hide! +RACHEL: That's crazy! +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: At the Copa, Copa Cabana The hottest spot north of Havana. +RACHEL: Yeah, totally! +RACHEL: This cannot happen! +RACHEL: You said she was bald. +RACHEL: And do you know how important these early experiences are Ross? +RACHEL: Well don’t—What happened to Jessica’s body?! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: I’d love to live at Warren’s! +RACHEL: I. Ohh! +RACHEL: Yeah, it sure is! +RACHEL: Hug me! +RACHEL: What’d I do? +RACHEL: Somebody just take this away from me! +RACHEL: I did it all by myself! +RACHEL: I don’t understand. +RACHEL: Okay look, let me paint you a little picture. +RACHEL: Ohh, wait a minute, we haven’t pre. +RACHEL: Nah, uh, uh, uh, uh. +RACHEL: It. +RACHEL: Listen to you talkin’ about having kids. +RACHEL: Oh look, there they go, okay. +RACHEL: No, happy for you! +RACHEL: I’m just losing a tooth, it’s no big deal. +RACHEL: Umm, I am free tomorrow night. +RACHEL: You kept saying how huge this all is! +RACHEL: Okay, but before you go, could you help me first? +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Oh damnit! +RACHEL: Should I be uh Hello? +RACHEL: She's gonna make it on time. +RACHEL: I just want to apologize. +RACHEL: Okay, y'know what, I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna call Gunther and I'm gonna tell him, I'm not quitting. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You’re my hero! +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: You went shopping?! +RACHEL: All right, all right, well you just blew your chances at dating Bob! +RACHEL: All right, listen, smirky. +RACHEL: Ohh, thank you. +RACHEL: Funny book? +RACHEL: Then we would all go into. +RACHEL: Oh, I can't believe this. +RACHEL: Hey, who's Phoebe with? +RACHEL: I'm going for a walk. +RACHEL: Hey, nice pillow. +RACHEL: Look at that guy by the window, wow! +RACHEL: Well, your first birthday is over, and it was really. +RACHEL: I mean it’s the end of an era! +RACHEL: Joey, that was formula. +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: No, III love it there. +RACHEL: Have you? +RACHEL: Oh yeah, good start Mon. +RACHEL: JoJoey, look honey we-we need to talk okay? +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: That is so not how I wanted things to end with us. +RACHEL: You just don’t look old enough to have a twenty-year-old daughter. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: So 800 and I don't call the cops because you're robbing me blind! +RACHEL: But enough about me, come on! +RACHEL: Of course! +RACHEL: I didn’t write it. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Why aren’t you home yet?! +RACHEL: Is it crazy? +RACHEL: Okay, I said that out loud right? +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: All right, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Who? +RACHEL: Umm, when is your next flight to. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Would you please, help me with this too? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Hey, whoa, slow down. +RACHEL: Whew! +RACHEL: Ohhhh. +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: Can I see you in my office for a minute? +RACHEL: He kinda takes your breath away doesn’t he? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Frizzy frizzy frizzy frizzy! +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: I wonder what he wants? +RACHEL: Phoebe, that is juice, squeezed from a person. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Oh excuse me! +RACHEL: Oh, look at that, yes I am. +RACHEL: Except that! +RACHEL: All right, y'know what I'm just upset that I'm getting nowhere with Joshua that y'know what still, you do not meet someone and go flitting off to Vermont! +RACHEL: Hey, nice toilet. +RACHEL: I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Uh-hmm. +RACHEL: What's that like? +RACHEL: If you win the lottery, it's the last you're gonna hear from us! +RACHEL: I forgot to pay Phoebe for the drinks. +RACHEL: That y’know what? +RACHEL: Ross got married again? +RACHEL: Well y'know, we have 7 people and like 10 pizzas, what do you think? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Wow, definitely just Drake. +RACHEL: Oh, Mindy, you are so stupid. +RACHEL: Open it! +RACHEL: Yeah and we’ll drop it off downstairs so that we’re not tempted. +RACHEL: I want my share of the tickets! +RACHEL: I just wanted to let you know I've changed my mind: I'm gonna do it, I'm gonna kiss Joey. +RACHEL: Hi, Joe! +RACHEL: Did you just make that up? +RACHEL: I wear it all the time. +RACHEL: Oh, look at me, look at me. +RACHEL: Uh Will umm, I just want to say that I’m real sorry for whatever II did to you in high school. +RACHEL: You’re all gonna be aunts and uncles. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, look you great. +RACHEL: Surprised? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Okay, so if you don’t remember that, maybe you will remember this! +RACHEL: Stop looking at me like that. +RACHEL: That’s why I brought it up. +RACHEL: Sure, you know what? +RACHEL: Well, believe it or not, it's true. +RACHEL: Yeah, and if doesn't work, then we'll be just one of those couples that never have sex. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Of course, I'd be honored! +RACHEL: I can't believe you let me go on and on like that! +RACHEL: Nothing. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Ohhh, ohhh, wow, that ear and nose hair trimmer I got him was just money down the drain, huh? +RACHEL: I don’t want to switch! +RACHEL: Yeah and you had fun teaching him how to be all Joey. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Look what, you made it into a bunny. +RACHEL: Wh-hey! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Uh well, I guess I’m not gonna miss the fact that you’re never allowed to move the phone pen. +RACHEL: She just offered to do something for another human being! +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: No, you know what, I think you should go. +RACHEL: Phoebe are you serious? +RACHEL: I mean he was possessive, he was jealous, he could never just let the little things go! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Yeah it is. +RACHEL: Anything? +RACHEL: All right, well how much time do you need? +RACHEL: Oh wow, uh okay, uh maybe. +RACHEL: Ross, this is not how we wanted you to find out about this. +RACHEL: That’s right, I wanna do it with you! +RACHEL: I mean I get crushes like this all the time! +RACHEL: Is-is he coming? +RACHEL: Get it out of here! +RACHEL: Oh Ross, come on. +RACHEL: Nooo! +RACHEL: So I can be by myself. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Kind of ditzy? +RACHEL: Look Joey, come on she’s so perfect for you! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Right! +RACHEL: Ross, I know the holidays can be rough. +RACHEL: I got. +RACHEL: You’ll never gonna believe happened to me today! +RACHEL: I got new sheets! +RACHEL: That’s fine! +RACHEL: No, no, no, no turtles scare me. +RACHEL: I cannot keep having this same fight with you Ross! +RACHEL: Oh oh oh, wait! +RACHEL: Not to shabby for Rachel. +RACHEL: Oh, it’s beautiful. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: It's certainly the easier choice. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Ohh… Oh, honey here. +RACHEL: Is that okay? +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Okay, stop what you're doing, I need envelope stuffers, I need stamp lickers. +RACHEL: How on earth will you ever annoy me? +RACHEL: I mean you care about me, you'r loving, you make me laugh. +RACHEL: Yes it is. +RACHEL: Okay, who's next?! +RACHEL: He's your brother. +RACHEL: I can’t do it! +RACHEL: Oh thank you so much. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: No? +RACHEL: Um, excuse me Gavin, I have a question I need to ask you. +RACHEL: I can’t! +RACHEL: Call the cops! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I mean, I just. +RACHEL: We could put a hat on his head. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: All right, y’know what, come on, do we really have to watch this while we eat? +RACHEL: What rumor? +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Well, maybe I don't need your money. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: How can your genitals make phone calls? +RACHEL: Ross, please, trust me. +RACHEL: Oh, Good Rach. +RACHEL: Well, I just called Joshua. +RACHEL: Ah that’s great. +RACHEL: LESLIE Look at you, you are so big I can't believe it! +RACHEL: Did you put pickles on this? +RACHEL: You have a roommate?! +RACHEL: And that’s Phoebe, and that’s Joey. +RACHEL: I'm telling you I'm quitting! +RACHEL: Oh, well, thanks, but, I'm okay, really. +RACHEL: Maybe it’s tell Monica I’m sorry I…drank the last of the milk. +RACHEL: Give it! +RACHEL: Yes we can, yes we can. +RACHEL: What happened?! +RACHEL: I’m not gonna marry Chandler! +RACHEL: Uh, we are here to break up with you. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Okay, you know what You're going to have to call that plane and. +RACHEL: You know, he was just doing his job. +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: My hero! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Oh, I. Oh, I know. +RACHEL: That-that you came on to me? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: My God! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Right? +RACHEL: I would so move out! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Why on earth would I understand this? +RACHEL: This is great! +RACHEL: OK, Phoebs. +RACHEL: No, was he any good in it? +RACHEL: Three women have come and gone with their babies, you gotta give me some good news! +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: My God! +RACHEL: We just uh, we just met at the newsstand. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: But I’m just gonna take the-the Pashmina. +RACHEL: After our date last night, did you feel a little weird? +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah, you go talk to your friend. +RACHEL: My God. +RACHEL: Let’s go. +RACHEL: Space cowboy! +RACHEL: You do? +RACHEL: Doesn’t he? +RACHEL: Ooh, nice! +RACHEL: Greens do not quit! +RACHEL: Yeah, y'know what? +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: No no no, wait, I wanna see what happens. +RACHEL: He got phased out! +RACHEL: Oh, I probably shouldn’t so I will! +RACHEL: III of course, I have more responsibilities than that. +RACHEL: Hey guys! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I'm gonna do it. +RACHEL: Yeah that would really be great. +RACHEL: What do you mean, there you are? +RACHEL: I'd love it. +RACHEL: Chandler or your mom? +RACHEL: Give him the sandwich! +RACHEL: Right? +RACHEL: Oh, please, you wanted to get caught. +RACHEL: I miss that. +RACHEL: Oh God, get out! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I hope you feel better! +RACHEL: How can I watch him get married? +RACHEL: You don't pick me! +RACHEL: Oh, it ended very well. +RACHEL: Oh, God. +RACHEL: Yeah, you got like 14 hours until she has to be at the airport, and you’re sitting here in the hallway with a 28-year-old cheerleader with a fat lip. +RACHEL: We're good? +RACHEL: I cannot go with you and my sister thing. +RACHEL: Kiss me. +RACHEL: Absolutely. +RACHEL: Noooo! +RACHEL: Well, y’know what though you guys? +RACHEL: I just never thought I would raise this baby all by myself. +RACHEL: See, for a superhero, not so much with the listening. +RACHEL: I'm gonna get back to retraining. +RACHEL: I’m Rachel. +RACHEL: Oh and it was great to see you too. +RACHEL: When we were out there today, all I kept thinking was: I can't believe Chandler is screwing this woman, but MAN this would be a nice place to live! +RACHEL: And someday you’re gonna win one of these for real, and that one is gonna mean something. +RACHEL: Ohh, of course Monica’s brother! +RACHEL: Well, maybe you didn’t want it to end? +RACHEL: Did you just say Hi, Jew? +RACHEL: I don’t care! +RACHEL: Oh, that’s very—Really very-very okay. +RACHEL: And I hope it’s not an inappropriate time to say this but, you’re the best sex I ever had. +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: This is a girl's apartment! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh, honey, that's so sweet. +RACHEL: Oh God, I hate my job, I hate it, I hate my job, I hate it. +RACHEL: No, you're right, you are absolutely right. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh not again! +RACHEL: The nurse said the doctor is wonderful. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah. +RACHEL: God it's just such a small world! +RACHEL: I am maid of honor! +RACHEL: I’m sorry, she just doesn’t feel like an Isabella. +RACHEL: Well? +RACHEL: I don’t care! +RACHEL: I don't know, what were the names I just said? +RACHEL: I'm Rachel Green. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I'm ok! +RACHEL: I did not! +RACHEL: Ok, dial it up a little! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: You can put your coats and sweaters and pants and shirts in the bedroom. +RACHEL: That deserves another piece of candy. +RACHEL: II will promise I will straighten this out with him tomorrow in person, or via e-mail. +RACHEL: OH MY GOD! +RACHEL: There's nothing above your bed! +RACHEL: I don’t want you to see me naked! +RACHEL: Excuse me. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh, Phoebe, I’m sorry! +RACHEL: I mean, it’s Ross. +RACHEL: Thank you so much. +RACHEL: Well, maybe-maybe I could be your roommate Pheebs. +RACHEL: Thank God you’re pretty. +RACHEL: Was it good for you? +RACHEL: Don't get up! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I am feeling nothing. +RACHEL: Let’s roll! +RACHEL: I have to catch my stupid plane. +RACHEL: Tag… I’m having a baby. +RACHEL: You went shopping for fur? +RACHEL: Your soulmate is out there, somewhere. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Now do you use some sort of special conditioner on that hair?! +RACHEL: Okay, all right, give me the mug! +RACHEL: Now, while I distract her, you get in the office. +RACHEL: Well, what is the other reason? +RACHEL: Ahhhh! +RACHEL: Blind! +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: And then I called him, and he wasn't there. +RACHEL: ‘Cause I am really happy about us. +RACHEL: Honey, honey, honey, it's okay, it's okay honey. +RACHEL: Well, how did you find out? +RACHEL: Yeah, it's in there. +RACHEL: Come on don’t be mad. +RACHEL: Well wait, watch this, you know what? +RACHEL: Okay, y’know what? +RACHEL: Honey, might I suggest watching a little more ESPN and a little less E!? +RACHEL: II don’t. +RACHEL: Oh sure. +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: Ok, Pheebs, can I ask? +RACHEL: I just want to get over him gosh, why can't I do that? +RACHEL: Ohh, thank you, thank you, thank you. +RACHEL: Guess who walks into my office is the end of my story. +RACHEL: I know I don’t work late tomorrow night. +RACHEL: Why, does she have a bad personality? +RACHEL: God this is so stupid! +RACHEL: I mean I’ve got it narrowed down to two people. +RACHEL: I cannot believe you. +RACHEL: No, no no no, don't need to know the details. +RACHEL: Oh, I have to get my number back. +RACHEL: Now I'm mommy in this little play? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Well, look at that, same thing. +RACHEL: Congratulations, that's quite a waste of time. +RACHEL: Ross, that girl just spent the entire evening talking to your friends, asking to hear stories about you, looking through Monica’s photo albums, I mean you don’t do that if you’re just in it for two weeks. +RACHEL: Hi Daddy. +RACHEL: Oh my God, who is it?! +RACHEL: I mean a baby changes everything. +RACHEL: I’m not a pushover. +RACHEL: Oh, gosh, what am I wearing?! +RACHEL: Oh, wait, Joshua! +RACHEL: That's because he's on your neck. +RACHEL: Here's to Ross! +RACHEL: I mean you'd think he'd be worried about me not showing up at his club. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Oh no-no, no! +RACHEL: No honey, it's okay! +RACHEL: All right, we were shaking hands and he kinda leaned toward me. +RACHEL: Oh, thank you. +RACHEL: Because I already got a Mother and a Father who cannot stay in the same room together, okay, I don't wanna have to have a separate room for you too! +RACHEL: That's me! +RACHEL: Oh, no no no no. +RACHEL: Two whole summers at T. G. I. Friday’s, come on! +RACHEL: I don't even have a car. +RACHEL: Ok, who is this? +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: And how come you never said anything to me. +RACHEL: Now even though I, hey-hey-hey, even though I kissed you, that does not give you the right to demand sex from me. +RACHEL: I was just asking 'cause I need someone to watch Emma tonight. +RACHEL: Peter. +RACHEL: Ugh, the worse day! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: See Phoebe, Phoebe. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: About an hour ago. +RACHEL: What do you do if I say we are coming about? +RACHEL: Oh my God, Jill! +RACHEL: I just wanted to ask Phoebe her opinion on what I should wear tonight. +RACHEL: I can’t believe that you yelled at my boss! +RACHEL: ‘Cause I know he’s gonna flip out and I hate it when he’s angry. +RACHEL: Ohh, you guys are so made for each other. +RACHEL: Umm, I’ve known them separately and I’ve known them together and-and to know them as a couple is to know that you are truly in the presence of love. +RACHEL: Emma might like what? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Cute guys in little shorts? +RACHEL: Are you crazy?! +RACHEL: And yes we are gonna have a baby. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: That’s your, that’s your dad’s bedroom. +RACHEL: Honey, you’ve waited long enough! +RACHEL: What’s-what’s going on? +RACHEL: You know, I mean, if all you've ever actually had are healthy pets, then, whoosh! +RACHEL: But! +RACHEL: Would I have seen you in anything? +RACHEL: I gotta tell ya IIII think you are the one who is too much. +RACHEL: He’s dating that slut in marketing! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I mean of course you never leave a baby alone! +RACHEL: Monica, please? +RACHEL: Joey, do they know that we know? +RACHEL: I didn’t want her to think I was a terrible mother! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: I am jealous of her?! +RACHEL: All right, y’know—Fine! +RACHEL: UNI-sex. +RACHEL: Oh, Sophie, I guess you didn't hear about Joanna. +RACHEL: Angels. +RACHEL: A break from us. +RACHEL: No no no no! +RACHEL: And then the next thing I know she just starts starts pulling me out by my hair! +RACHEL: Ralph mumbles a lot. +RACHEL: I'm great! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Ah you went one too far. +RACHEL: You didn’t see how brazen she was. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Um, everyone? +RACHEL: Did you call your parents? +RACHEL: It was like months ago. +RACHEL: Ross, it is 100 degrees outside. +RACHEL: Anyway sweetie, I am, I’m so sorry I ruined your night. +RACHEL: But I—But everything is okay. +RACHEL: Okay, good. +RACHEL: I really don't. +RACHEL: Oh God, if she would just stop moving. +RACHEL: I get when you told people at first that you wanted to be an actor they laughed at you! +RACHEL: What were you thinking?! +RACHEL: There's just something wrong with your machine. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: OK, Phoebe, that is not a tattoo, this is a tattoo. +RACHEL: I'll call the super. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I am a big girl. +RACHEL: What! +RACHEL: Joey, y’know that you could just not throw the sticks up in the air. +RACHEL: And I know that hiring him was probably not the smartest thing that I’ve ever done. +RACHEL: Food? +RACHEL: Ohhh well. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh that’s-that’s actually how the French drink it. +RACHEL: I'm just afraid if I don't come back right now this guy's gonna try to squeeze me out. +RACHEL: Aww, look at the little thing. +RACHEL: Are you kidding?! +RACHEL: That actually means something here. +RACHEL: Well, sure just a sec, though, 'cause Paolo's on his way over. +RACHEL: The commercial? +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: I think I did something really stupid. +RACHEL: No, the other thing. +RACHEL: Now I love you even more. +RACHEL: The baby is kicking for the first time! +RACHEL: Well, at least that's a great suit. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: I love you all so much. +RACHEL: This is Phoebe. +RACHEL: What’s this? +RACHEL: I really think it’s great they work things out. +RACHEL: Could you be a dear and go tell him? +RACHEL: Joey you were so ready for it! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh, you're welcome a million. +RACHEL: MONICA: Alright, I tell you what, I'll give this to you now if you can tell me where we keep the dustpan. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Who else wants one of my special homemade brownies? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Hi, we just found this cat, and we er, looking for the owner. +RACHEL: God. +RACHEL: Well that sounds kinda cool, kinda like The Hobbit. +RACHEL: Ross was never very good at the flirting thing. +RACHEL: Oh, god. +RACHEL: We rented a movie. +RACHEL: OK, ready when you are. +RACHEL: She asked-asked you out again? +RACHEL: That was really sweet. +RACHEL: Oh but look! +RACHEL: Maybe I have to pee again. +RACHEL: I know that. +RACHEL: He, he, he. +RACHEL: My resumé? +RACHEL: I mean I gotI got drunk and married in Vegas! +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: It's just that all the people in the entire world that I want to talk to are right here. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Well, my boss was at the same restaurant where I was having my interview and he heard everything. +RACHEL: Barry! +RACHEL: I was supposed to call my Dad back like two hours ago. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Hi Ross! +RACHEL: I think you should drink the fat. +RACHEL: Y’know, this bra, Really, bothers me. +RACHEL: Why-why aren't you more excited? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Well it was Joey reading Drake's lines in the dream. +RACHEL: She does that a lot! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Okay, look, I know, all right, just one dinner, please, just one night for me, please. +RACHEL: Well how would you like it if I had sex with you and I taped it? +RACHEL: I am sorry! +RACHEL: You don't pay her. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Mon, I'm so sorry. +RACHEL: Is he okay in there? +RACHEL: I can't believe you live in that building. +RACHEL: So, is this just gonna be you and Carol? +RACHEL: And I just feel awful. +RACHEL: Monica and Chandler's apartment. +RACHEL: You’re just staring into space. +RACHEL: Why today? +RACHEL: Oh God, well, it started about a half hour before the wedding. +RACHEL: You're twins? +RACHEL: And oh my God, I can’t believe Ross is marrying my little sister, this terrible. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I'm trained for nothing! +RACHEL: Phoebe, the place has emptied because of him. +RACHEL: That was fun Pheebs. +RACHEL: Ow-ow! +RACHEL: Have you ever seen so much crap? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Because I asked him to. +RACHEL: Paolo sent them from Italy. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I'm not allowed to borrow her stuff! +RACHEL: Yep! +RACHEL: Oh-okay, but Pheebs? +RACHEL: Uh, flowers or balloons? +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Y’know, the only person who would want to listen to this is a mental health professional! +RACHEL: Okay, should we get some coffee? +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: Who the hell are you!? +RACHEL: I’m so sorry. +RACHEL: Weather bitch! +RACHEL: I wasn’t supposed to put beef in the trifle! +RACHEL: NO, no science camp! +RACHEL: Oh, it's so late for 'Shall we'. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: ROSS! +RACHEL: It’s only fair! +RACHEL: Sort of like a, like a ring toss kind of situation? +RACHEL: When I was um, 7, I crashed my bike right out in front of his house and to stop me from crying he kissed me right here. +RACHEL: I’ll move in. +RACHEL: Ohh, thank you for my beautiul earrings, they're perfect. +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: I’m sorry, semi-private? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Get up! +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: Monica, what did you mean before when you said you didn’t want to talk to anyone, especially me? +RACHEL: Wait, we still have time to talk and they’re-they're not even in the car yet! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh my God, Melissa Warburton. +RACHEL: Oh and Emma, look at your stuffed animals lined up so neatly! +RACHEL: I mean, I have never made coffee before in my entire life. +RACHEL: All right listen umm, I just bought something I'm not sure she's gonna like it, and it's gonna seem a little crazy, but this is something that I wanted since I was a little girl. +RACHEL: Ok. Ok, let’s keep talking. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: II, I need you to talk to me. +RACHEL: Honey, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: This whole break-up thing is just stupid. +RACHEL: I’m not gonna move out! +RACHEL: I can make you this generation’s Milton Berle. +RACHEL: How did you make 17. +RACHEL: You fell asleep?! +RACHEL: I’m sorry, it’s for human resources, everybody has to do it. +RACHEL: I mean you’d think the damn jalepeno would’ve cleared up your sinuses, but no! +RACHEL: Because, uh it has to. +RACHEL: The wedding is in less than an hour! +RACHEL: Well, I haven’t seen him since that night that he told me how he y’know… I don’t know, I think he’s avoiding me. +RACHEL: Why’s that? +RACHEL: At the, wait, wait, everybody. +RACHEL: Joey, you can't keep this to yourself, if you know about this, you have to tell him. +RACHEL: Wh. +RACHEL: Ross, you know what? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Don’t you have to give him his money back? +RACHEL: Me too. +RACHEL: Whoops! +RACHEL: Get off. +RACHEL: Son of a bitch! +RACHEL: Ok honey, you really need a job. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Who are you to decide what messages I should or should not get? +RACHEL: What’s the big deal? +RACHEL: Oh you’re in real estate! +RACHEL: Y'know II could have toys for underprivileged kids in here! +RACHEL: She was a showgirl. +RACHEL: Please? +RACHEL: I am sitting in my office and. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: What are we gonna do? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: There are so many things that she disapproves of! +RACHEL: Yeah, and umm my baby. +RACHEL: Mm-hmm. +RACHEL: So? +RACHEL: Well, I think you're forgetting the kinkiest former resident of that room. +RACHEL: Please laugh for. +RACHEL: Guys, I'm not. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Stop picturing it! +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: Yeah, pretty nice, huh? +RACHEL: But that wasn't gonna stop you before! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Who's are they? +RACHEL: Oh, there you are! +RACHEL: I would, I would've never fogged you if y'know if you hadn't looked so. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Yeah, but that just means that he was falling asleep on top of her instead of me. +RACHEL: Ross said my name up there that obviously means that he still loves me! +RACHEL: Ross, wait! +RACHEL: I know this is a lot to ask, but you know what? +RACHEL: We will do anything we can to help you! +RACHEL: Joey proposed to me. +RACHEL: Okay, you know what? +RACHEL: Ohhh! +RACHEL: What 'cha readin'? +RACHEL: Uh no, he’s not. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hey, so did everything go all right with the annulment? +RACHEL: Umm. +RACHEL: Ugh, she is a slut! +RACHEL: That’s it! +RACHEL: Ross, what is this? +RACHEL: I really do. +RACHEL: Phil’s really pissed! +RACHEL: So, as a gift to you, on our last night, ta-da! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Did those cost reports come in? +RACHEL: It’s Rach. +RACHEL: So, does this come in another color or… So this is Brooklyn. +RACHEL: There we go. +RACHEL: Yeah, well, I guess I have forgotten about Joey and clearly you've forgotten about Chandler! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Phoebe, come on can we finish this later? +RACHEL: Okay, uhm, alright, here's the deal. +RACHEL: We are so gonna find them this year. +RACHEL: It's Chandler. +RACHEL: That's not nonchalant! +RACHEL: I’ve actually never had anyone work for me before. +RACHEL: I love you. +RACHEL: That's why I was getting married. +RACHEL: Oh, oh thanks. +RACHEL: There you go, Joey, you got your job back. +RACHEL: What happened to uh, MEG? +RACHEL: I am so hot for you right now. +RACHEL: He just kept asking, and asking, and asking, and asking, and asking, and asking. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I have the best job in the entire world! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Okay, so let's play for some pepper! +RACHEL: You don’t have to share stuff. +RACHEL: Is that going to be awkward? +RACHEL: What is it? +RACHEL: I think so. +RACHEL: There is this great guy you will love at work named Bob! +RACHEL: You were insanely jealous of him. +RACHEL: Oh no, no, I’ll be there too. +RACHEL: No-no-no! +RACHEL: You can’t just kiss me and think you’re gonna make it all go away, okay? +RACHEL: What is the matter with you?! +RACHEL: Oh, God! +RACHEL: It was, oh my god. +RACHEL: You kissed! +RACHEL: There is a hardware store right down the street? +RACHEL: Oh good. +RACHEL: If you do this I. Phoebe will, do anything you want. +RACHEL: OK. +RACHEL: I don't have it, Hi, Pheebs. +RACHEL: Oh no Ross! +RACHEL: You’re so sweet. +RACHEL: Ohh, great! +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Look! +RACHEL: Hey, y’know what we never did? +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: He's got this thing. +RACHEL: Oh, was it awful? +RACHEL: Amy, hi! +RACHEL: Well, there's you. +RACHEL: Woow! +RACHEL: Uh, Mon, you-you gonna leave your shoes out here? +RACHEL: Uh. +RACHEL: Yeah, these are pretty ch-ching. +RACHEL: Shoop, shoop, shoop. +RACHEL: The diapers? +RACHEL: Well guys tend to get naked before they're gonna have sex. +RACHEL: But, they’re across the hall! +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: Your Danny's wingman right? +RACHEL: No, these aren't all my suitcases. +RACHEL: You know secrets? +RACHEL: I’m so sorry. +RACHEL: Well, I don't get it, but she wanted me to give you her phone number. +RACHEL: Look! +RACHEL: Well, uh something about having second thoughts about the wedding and did you guys make a mistake breaking up and uh, she wants you to call her. +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: I used to babysit him. +RACHEL: So uh, Frank and Alice wanted me to tell you that they're still outside making phone calls. +RACHEL: Why, Gavin, why? +RACHEL: It's not a big deal! +RACHEL: Alright! +RACHEL: Come on Ross! +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: Ross, tonight was about the two of you getting along. +RACHEL: I was just going to do this myself. +RACHEL: Oh, God. +RACHEL: Isn't that like a robot?! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Do you think we would’ve done it? +RACHEL: Joey, you can’t let him get away with that. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Alright, I can't, I can't wait that long. +RACHEL: We gotta go! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: I read that. +RACHEL: He takes naked pictures of us! +RACHEL: I bet 20. +RACHEL: Where?! +RACHEL: Yeah, y’know what? +RACHEL: Nothing else worked. +RACHEL: I don’t know! +RACHEL: Let me just get my coat. +RACHEL: I do! +RACHEL: How are you holding up? +RACHEL: Well, I should think so. +RACHEL: I'm moving on, and you're moving on with me. +RACHEL: Hurry. +RACHEL: Yeah, otherwise I’m not going. +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: Ohh, sorry. +RACHEL: Yeah but, my assistant Tag does sit-ups in the office during lunch. +RACHEL: But that still doesn’t give us the right to erase his message! +RACHEL: Anyway, I just had to get out of there, and I started wondering 'Why am I doing this, and who am I doing this for?'. +RACHEL: I sw. +RACHEL: Good. +RACHEL: You just did a little dancy thing. +RACHEL: Ow-ow! +RACHEL: Of course they’re listening to you! +RACHEL: You’re right. +RACHEL: I’m just uh, about to umm, go out to the store to get some stuff to put in my backpack. +RACHEL: Tip of the iceberg. +RACHEL: It's not like I did this on purpose. +RACHEL: What are you talking about Pheebs? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Well, III don't know how this fits into your whole seizing thing but um, Emily called you today. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I didn't have a good time in Greece! +RACHEL: Yeah, but you know, this is, it's fine. +RACHEL: I guess we have to eat. +RACHEL: Oh, come on Joey! +RACHEL: Ooo Ooo. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: I'm leaving! +RACHEL: Unless maybe they were a park ranger! +RACHEL: Well than, you better go take that back because they're gonna charge you for that. +RACHEL: He works at the university. +RACHEL: Phoebe, what? +RACHEL: I'm sorry, what? +RACHEL: Except he makes us watch the Discovery Channel all day long. +RACHEL: I want to hear the rest! +RACHEL: It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater. +RACHEL: Okay, great. +RACHEL: Hey Ross! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Look at you guys! +RACHEL: Yeah, all right. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh yeah, don’t get to worked up over it. +RACHEL: No, you guys, you really don't have to go, we're done talking. +RACHEL: Joey lives with a duck! +RACHEL: Tag, I have a conference call today is that correct? +RACHEL: No, wait. +RACHEL: She's coming up! +RACHEL: Hey wait a minute! +RACHEL: Peter Luger! +RACHEL: Oh, it’s a Macy’s bag! +RACHEL: How did you think you were gonna get away with that? +RACHEL: Great, someone is in our apartment. +RACHEL: Oh Phoebe, we forgot that party we have to go to. +RACHEL: Ohh, he’s coming over. +RACHEL: Hello, this is Rachel Green, how can I help you? +RACHEL: He even offered to meet me for lunch tomorrow to prep me for it. +RACHEL: That’s the end of this conversation! +RACHEL: Honey, Monica, this is ridiculous! +RACHEL: Wow, you guys this is big. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Seriously I did not understand a word that you said. +RACHEL: I thought we’d lost you forever. +RACHEL: It's because it reminds her of her uncle Joey! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh, come on, Louisa. +RACHEL: Because II've seen them. +RACHEL: Oh yeah? +RACHEL: Oh my God, my entire life is flashing before my eyes. +RACHEL: I really owe you an appology. +RACHEL: Oh, I’m sorry, were you speaking to me or sleeping with someone else? +RACHEL: Yeah, sure! +RACHEL: OK, Michael, let's talk about you. +RACHEL: There was never any parking by the Psychology building. +RACHEL: This is Bonnie? +RACHEL: Oh no! +RACHEL: This ain’t a locker room, okay? +RACHEL: I’m miserable here! +RACHEL: Nooo, he's leaving for a better job. +RACHEL: Joey, would you just come out here and stop being such a baby! +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: With Ross and my sister? +RACHEL: Let me uh, let me ask you something, do wedding vows mean squat to you people?! +RACHEL: All right look lady here is the deal, I came here for an annulment and I am not leaving here until I get one! +RACHEL: No, you! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: Me and him alone. +RACHEL: Okay, okay. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Did-did you take these back? +RACHEL: So, uh, what are you gonna do this summer? +RACHEL: We did not fog Danny! +RACHEL: Are people eating my dip? +RACHEL: Y'know when I locked myself in the bathroom at my wedding, it was because I was trying to pop the window out of the frame. +RACHEL: Joey is afraid of the tarantula. +RACHEL: Oh, that is so sweet. +RACHEL: Tails! +RACHEL: Joey?! +RACHEL: All right, now don’t judge me. +RACHEL: I’m thinking, I’m gonna order a pizza. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I can too eat by myself! +RACHEL: Sweetie. +RACHEL: But my, but my boss cannot see me. +RACHEL: Oh, no, no. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Damn! +RACHEL: I thought we've gotten to a place where we could be happy for each other! +RACHEL: But could someone please make sure that sandwich is gone when I get out there? +RACHEL: You sang, to our baby daughter, a song about a guy who. +RACHEL: Joey, oh you’re so sweet. +RACHEL: We never use them. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: II forgot my underwear. +RACHEL: Noo way, Kevin. +RACHEL: That’s right! +RACHEL: Ohh, honey no problem. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Ooh! +RACHEL: What the hell is that?! +RACHEL: II am not uptight. +RACHEL: Oh no. +RACHEL: Phoebe? +RACHEL: Oh, god. +RACHEL: Oh, I gotta get back to work. +RACHEL: Who's FICA? +RACHEL: Umm, my friend seems to have had a little accident. +RACHEL: Why hasn’t he called Rachel? +RACHEL: Look what happened! +RACHEL: Where are you going? +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Are you serious? +RACHEL: I couldn't find him for two hours! +RACHEL: She lent me the earrings, and I lost it. +RACHEL: Do you even know what a vicar is? +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: Okay, I do. +RACHEL: Run away! +RACHEL: You guys can’t leave yet! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Hey, why do you think she won’t take my breast? +RACHEL: This may be the only wedding I ever have. +RACHEL: What do you want me to do? +RACHEL: Ohhh! +RACHEL: All right that’s it! +RACHEL: What’s up?! +RACHEL: Oh, shoot. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: How come we have one extra place setting? +RACHEL: Monica, what are you talking about? +RACHEL: What's that? +RACHEL: Julie! +RACHEL: Especially not above Kim, who is an integral cog in the Ralph Lauren machine. +RACHEL: what? +RACHEL: What do ya think? +RACHEL: Ugh, that was so embarrassing! +RACHEL: All right Joe, you remember the rules! +RACHEL: Last night she was teaching everybody how to make napkin, swans. +RACHEL: Here you go. +RACHEL: We're not late, we're right on time. +RACHEL: Ross, it just wouldn’t have been feasible. +RACHEL: Mr. Waltham, I ah really need to talk to you. +RACHEL: Yes, you did! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Where you goin'? +RACHEL: I’m ripping into this swan. +RACHEL: Ahh. +RACHEL: This is the first time in my life I'm doing something that I'm actually good at. +RACHEL: Except, Phoebe's not gonna be the one that gets to dress. +RACHEL: oooh! +RACHEL: Oh sorry didn’t mean to interrupt. +RACHEL: Oh wait! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Joey no wait it is. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Yeah, I know, I do. +RACHEL: Well actually. +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hey, now wait a minute. +RACHEL: Shut up! +RACHEL: My father had an heart attack, while I was at Barney’s. +RACHEL: Ethan called again. +RACHEL: Come on, the bottom line here is that you love her. +RACHEL: He was you’re health teacher. +RACHEL: So I'm gonna go and take a nice long hot bubble bath because you kids are driving me crazy. +RACHEL: I’m great! +RACHEL: I don’t know anything. +RACHEL: Oh, you know what, we haven't even looked yet. +RACHEL: Oh my gosh. +RACHEL: Guys agree like that. +RACHEL: That's so unlike you. +RACHEL: I'm not gonna tell you, but if you found out on your own, that would be okay and then we could talk about it. +RACHEL: Oh my god. +RACHEL: See ya. +RACHEL: Big bear! +RACHEL: center! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Yeah, for my desert, I have chosen to make a traditional English trifle! +RACHEL: Uhhh, yeah. +RACHEL: But what about Phoebe? +RACHEL: Ross is just having a little trouble adjusting to the thought of Joey and me. +RACHEL: He took. +RACHEL: see I can’t decide whether it would go better next to the new wicker dining chair, the Sahara desk, or the Parker console table. +RACHEL: God I’m just a horrible person. +RACHEL: It just it took me so long to get that desk organized. +RACHEL: You don't want me to get a job? +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: He’s a good kisser isn’t he? +RACHEL: It's just too weird, I just saw a one year old running around with pantyhose on! +RACHEL: Honey, that's very sweet, it just seems to me though, that if two people love each other and trust each other, like we do, there's no reason to be jealous. +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: All right, y’know what? +RACHEL: I’m married and I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Phoebe, come on that's silly. +RACHEL: Oh, well, it's complicated. +RACHEL: I think we're gonna take off too. +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: The most unbelievable thing happened to me today. +RACHEL: God no! +RACHEL: uh-huh. +RACHEL: So, how was the party. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Hey-hey-hey! +RACHEL: We figured you might respond this way, so we have a backup offer. +RACHEL: Your total disregard of other people's feelings? +RACHEL: Y'know, you didn’t have to walk me all the way back up here. +RACHEL: Out of all of us, who do you think is gonna get married next? +RACHEL: Oh Amy, don't cry Amy. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh great! +RACHEL: And it's not even for me! +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Huh? +RACHEL: Well, okay, look. +RACHEL: Hit me. +RACHEL: Uh, wait, so you guys are telling me you actually did the routine from eighth grade? +RACHEL: Ok? +RACHEL: What are we Shushing? +RACHEL: You buy me one! +RACHEL: Bye Kash. +RACHEL: Fluffy?! +RACHEL: Oh, give me! +RACHEL: It's not here Pheebs, it's not here. +RACHEL: This is so great. +RACHEL: Is that a problem? +RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry, look at me. +RACHEL: Big commission picked up a daddy. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Stop looking at my ass! +RACHEL: Oh good. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Just give me something. +RACHEL: Oh my God, he’s… Look at the way he’s just staring at me. +RACHEL: Hey guys do you think this is too slutty—Hi Kash! +RACHEL: Oh, don't be such a baby! +RACHEL: Joey? +RACHEL: Said what? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Well, that’s because of a lot of, I know! +RACHEL: Big day Monday lots to do. +RACHEL: What’s wrong? +RACHEL: I’ll go under, you go over! +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: RelaxiTaxi! +RACHEL: I hate the fact that my room is so small. +RACHEL: I mean, why not especially you and me? +RACHEL: You forgot your erm. +RACHEL: OK. +RACHEL: Let's talk about relationships! +RACHEL: He’s coming over! +RACHEL: Monica. +RACHEL: How long has she been crying? +RACHEL: Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you! +RACHEL: Oh my God, look at these pelts! +RACHEL: Ugh, is she pregnant yet? +RACHEL: Ah, so what are we looking at? +RACHEL: Sure! +RACHEL: No sharing. +RACHEL: You want to know why I'm not giving Emily to you. +RACHEL: That’s weird, she locked the door. +RACHEL: Okay, well keep in mind that by the time you're done, they'll probably be serving dinner. +RACHEL: What a jerk! +RACHEL: OK, we're kinda gettin' off the track here. +RACHEL: Take care. +RACHEL: Ahh. +RACHEL: He said something about a boat and I was like, Well, yeah! +RACHEL: No? +RACHEL: All right, I'll just stay in here this time. +RACHEL: Got a second? +RACHEL: We got everything that we needed! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Huh umm… Well that—y’know it’s just uh, I’ve never done that before. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Would you stay here with me for a little while? +RACHEL: Right, and the humiliating. +RACHEL: Oh? +RACHEL: But I don't, hmm. +RACHEL: I almost lost your. +RACHEL: Did you check your entire desk! +RACHEL: Okay, I need a date! +RACHEL: D’oh! +RACHEL: Oh God, I'm, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Ooh. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: You have to pick one! +RACHEL: Ross didn’t get the annulment we are still married. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Sure? +RACHEL: I should really get back to work. +RACHEL: Oh, I can't. +RACHEL: There’s nothing there! +RACHEL: It’s just a healthy expression of female sexuality, which by the way, you will never understand. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Later! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: I’m a Mormon, or I got so hammered last night I’m still a little drunk? +RACHEL: What's up?! +RACHEL: Wait, wait, Chandler, this is what you're havin' for Thanksgiving dinner? +RACHEL: Ohh, you know who you should go with? +RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. +RACHEL: Yeah, III just pulled the tab and I just fogged his yeti ass! +RACHEL: Okay, bla-bla-bla-bla! +RACHEL: Do you have to do that? +RACHEL: This is shaping up to be a pretty good date—Oh, I almost forgot. +RACHEL: I mean, I mean like craaaazy! +RACHEL: Why should I have to leave?! +RACHEL: Then, you will definitely get him back! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: I did but she doesn’t think anyone would be stupid enough to confuse Kenny the copy guy with Ralph Lauren. +RACHEL: Got myself a date tomorrow night. +RACHEL: Joey, good one! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Listen, look I thought a lot about how to tell you this and the bottom line, Ross, is we can not stay married. +RACHEL: Ross, I don't, I just don't think it's going to fit. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Thanks! +RACHEL: Umm, is there a place I can go freshen up? +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: All right Phoebe I will let you have him, but you owe me you owe me big! +RACHEL: Joey, she knows! +RACHEL: Too into her looks? +RACHEL: Well, that's so weird! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I can't believe you just did that! +RACHEL: Excuse me. +RACHEL: Let me just get this straight! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Yeah, it'll be fun. +RACHEL: Oh god. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Yeah fun? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Depends who asked. +RACHEL: Oh, but he was my pig man how did I not see this? +RACHEL: I think she’s checking out your beehive Ross. +RACHEL: Oh my god. +RACHEL: Look at it! +RACHEL: Oh, good, good! +RACHEL: Oh, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Great. +RACHEL: And hey! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: She's a person, you can do it! +RACHEL: It’s okay! +RACHEL: Ok. Ok. Ok, careful, ok. Oh, she’s smiling! +RACHEL: I'm gonna get to help decide what we sell, I'm gonna have an office with walls and everything. +RACHEL: Absolutely! +RACHEL: Well, this is going well. +RACHEL: Ah! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Okay Ross, can I uh, can I ask you something? +RACHEL: Please don’t! +RACHEL: Am I hurting you? +RACHEL: It's because you mean more to me. +RACHEL: What did you get her? +RACHEL: OK. Well, now, see, you never ever ever told us that. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You can so totally tell. +RACHEL: Y’know umm, uh, umm, about that, umm, Ross I really appreciate your offer to let me move in and everything, but don’t you think it’s gonna be weird? +RACHEL: For all he knows we're just hanging out together. +RACHEL: Oh is it?! +RACHEL: I'm doing just fine! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Well, let’s see. +RACHEL: Say more things like that. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, there you go. +RACHEL: We think you're going to be a wonderful parent. +RACHEL: Ohhh, you got my message. +RACHEL: Aw. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Well, II’m startin’ too. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Other than there names being similar, I'm sorry, I do not see what you're seeing. +RACHEL: Insane! +RACHEL: Bye! +RACHEL: I did! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Y'know? +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: They do! +RACHEL: Good luck, honey! +RACHEL: Car! +RACHEL: Well, I mean, when I first met you, y'know, I thought maybe, possibly, you might be. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Show cat! +RACHEL: He's so cute. +RACHEL: I knew it! +RACHEL: I think, if it was a little colder in here I could see your nipples through that sweater. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: What, what incident? +RACHEL: Ohhh, look it’s the roller blades. +RACHEL: Hi, sure! +RACHEL: Does anybody need anything? +RACHEL: Here comes another contraction. +RACHEL: You gotta get out there. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I don't know! +RACHEL: Hit me. +RACHEL: But y’know what, if you think it’s gonna be okay we’ll just work out a system. +RACHEL: And-and you don’t need, you don’t need this custom-made, empire waisted, duchess, satin gown you can wear off the rack. +RACHEL: The job is in Paris. +RACHEL: I mean. +RACHEL: Uh, want something-want something to drink? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Fine, I was just trying to be nice! +RACHEL: Not uh, not to my recollection. +RACHEL: It’s-it’s, they’re-they’re wearing it in Milan, so part of my job is too wear the clothes, and then I see how people respond, and then I report back to my superiors at Bloomingdale’s, so. +RACHEL: Ugh, Monica I don’t want to steal your stupid thunder! +RACHEL: Well where's Amanda? +RACHEL: I was just messin’ with you too! +RACHEL: It's not dumb. +RACHEL: Oh Phoebe, that’s a great story. +RACHEL: Wh-what are you doing here? +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: I feel like we’re the only two people in the world. +RACHEL: You are no different than the rest of them. +RACHEL: Straight! +RACHEL: oh! +RACHEL: Okay, here we go. +RACHEL: FYI. +RACHEL: Now, instead of the vegetables, is there anyway I can substitute the three-pound lobster? +RACHEL: Very Ambercrombie amp Fitch. +RACHEL: Look! +RACHEL: That’s not sexy. +RACHEL: You’ve bought like a billion of ‘em. +RACHEL: Okay Ross that’s fine, but can you please stand near my head? +RACHEL: You know, I always figured the first time I had a baby, it would be with someone I love and that baby would be like, a keeper. +RACHEL: Oh honey, don’t worry. +RACHEL: Surprise… …Monica. +RACHEL: I got off the plane. +RACHEL: Why did we have to rush out of there so fast?! +RACHEL: I mean I’m just. +RACHEL: No, honey, they're not, but don't worry, because we are going to find them, and until we do, we are all here for you, ok? +RACHEL: Especially not with all of these knives and cookbooks around. +RACHEL: Shh! +RACHEL: Okay, see now I’m scared because I don’t actually think you’re kidding. +RACHEL: Who? +RACHEL: What's the matter? +RACHEL: If you like looking at butts so much why don't you just go look at a mirror? +RACHEL: OK, that's fine, you just read the paper, I'm gonna get a pot, it's not for you. +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: You’re a terrific actor. +RACHEL: The very cute, cute, cute doctors asked us out for tomorrow night, and I said yes. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Well Joey, I hate to admit it, your way of sailing is a lot more fun. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Good, you guys are all here! +RACHEL: Hello, Chip. +RACHEL: Well, we never actually got to dinner. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Oh, oh, and hey-hey-hey, those little spelling tips will come in handy when you're at home on Saturday nights playing Scrabble with Monica! +RACHEL: I can’t. +RACHEL: How does he look? +RACHEL: Now throw it away! +RACHEL: That’s really great! +RACHEL: I’m just sort of in the middle of something. +RACHEL: Nobody even saw! +RACHEL: Ross, come on! +RACHEL: Look, If I don't get to London! +RACHEL: Yes, yes. +RACHEL: Phoebe, what are you doing? +RACHEL: Please, what about you and Chandler? +RACHEL: Hit me. +RACHEL: Of course, I know that! +RACHEL: Y’know, like the thing when you put the phone in your pants? +RACHEL: Ugh, okay, well somebody will come and save us. +RACHEL: Oh, ok, thank you. +RACHEL: And you said, No! +RACHEL: Well, so then what are you doing to me? +RACHEL: Yes it is! +RACHEL: Oh-oh-oh, symbolism! +RACHEL: I’m gonna go to the bathroom. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah! +RACHEL: Hi you guys. +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: Come on apartment! +RACHEL: Oh Paolo, this is Phoebe. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Whoa-whoa! +RACHEL: This is so cool. +RACHEL: Oh, y’know what you should get ‘em? +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: And why are the drapes shut?! +RACHEL: We’re not gonna do this, all right? +RACHEL: What grandmother? +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: O-oh my God! +RACHEL: Josh-u-a! +RACHEL: I dunno. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: So uh…I guess we should…make it official huh? +RACHEL: Food. +RACHEL: Joey, Joey I love you so much, but I. Joey. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: It y’know what? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: We have to invite people! +RACHEL: There are rats in the basement that are hanging themselves. +RACHEL: Wh. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I felt like such an idiot! +RACHEL: Arghh! +RACHEL: Oh honey he doesn’t need my help. +RACHEL: Oh hey, how's the dog? +RACHEL: Well yeah, sure, what’s up? +RACHEL: See, I don't know, for me it would have to Chantal. +RACHEL: Y'know. +RACHEL: Serious-ser-ser-seriously, what did she mean by that? +RACHEL: He knows what its about! +RACHEL: Hey-hey, now he's showing us his poking device. +RACHEL: You feel! +RACHEL: Hey, Happy Valentine’s Day! +RACHEL: Oh right, ‘cause you always pull your pants down at the count of three and play Wipe-out on your butt cheeks. +RACHEL: Oh my God, I left the water running. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Wait-wait where are you going? +RACHEL: Hey Pheebs, you’re still alive! +RACHEL: She ran into him at my office and they just made out. +RACHEL: Don’t answer me. +RACHEL: Someone? +RACHEL: Oh I know. +RACHEL: Good. +RACHEL: I care! +RACHEL: Okay, let’s do it. +RACHEL: I mean, that was pretty intense. +RACHEL: Thank you for being so nice. +RACHEL: You can't even open up your mind for a second to see if you're wrong! +RACHEL: I am. +RACHEL: Why don't you guys just do it on the street? +RACHEL: Oh.! +RACHEL: I thought I was a complete idiot. +RACHEL: What did you get her? +RACHEL: Come on see, she doesn't look that bad. +RACHEL: Phoebe, how do you even know who the father is? +RACHEL: Little village people. +RACHEL: Oh, that was just my crazy friend. +RACHEL: They were really round, burgundy, and they made you look kind of umm. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: It’s like it’s raining! +RACHEL: Four. +RACHEL: Yeah, maybe. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: And we talked business. +RACHEL: Can I please be there when you tell her? +RACHEL: Oh well, it's kinda lonely up there, so I just thought I would come out here and get some fresh air. +RACHEL: What are you doing? +RACHEL: It's not a magic couch. +RACHEL: Hey look-look, Phoebe’s talking to uh, Cute Coffeehouse Guy. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Well, y’know this whole marriage thing, kinda my idea. +RACHEL: No, you're right. +RACHEL: Okay that’s, you know what that is? +RACHEL: You want me to just quit my job so that you can feel like you’ve got a girlfriend? +RACHEL: You do that every year? +RACHEL: I mean it. +RACHEL: Just stay behind the curtain! +RACHEL: Ooh! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: You're sister? +RACHEL: You’re supposed to realize that they are adults! +RACHEL: Chandler, what did she say? +RACHEL: Honey, I'm just checking. +RACHEL: All right Monica, do you want to know why I was with Ross tonight?! +RACHEL: You’ve got something here on your back. +RACHEL: I'm not in love with Ross! +RACHEL: Joey please! +RACHEL: Wow, I wouldn’t think Hobbs would like that so much. +RACHEL: I’m a friend of Monica and Chandler’s! +RACHEL: Love you too. +RACHEL: I don’t know. +RACHEL: Oh, take the clothes of Joey's Cabbage Patch Kid. +RACHEL: Isn’t it incredible?! +RACHEL: Oh, come on! +RACHEL: I just wanna-Ahhh! +RACHEL: But I don’t know what he looks like! +RACHEL: Oh Ross, another contraction! +RACHEL: For you. +RACHEL: It's Rachel Green from Bloomingdale's. +RACHEL: Okay you’re right. +RACHEL: Well, II guess,I. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Well, um. +RACHEL: Can Emma and I live here for a while? +RACHEL: Oh, so you really wanted to learn. +RACHEL: I have a meeting tomorrow with Gucci. +RACHEL: I don’t know. +RACHEL: Ah. +RACHEL: Look at you, you're practically giddy. +RACHEL: I know isn’t it? +RACHEL: Just rest, get ready for the baby. +RACHEL: Are you in trouble. +RACHEL: Mindy, the guy is the devil! +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: Well, it's about time. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh my God, is that Phoebe? +RACHEL: It’s one huge room! +RACHEL: Because I promised Mindy I would. +RACHEL: It's ugh! +RACHEL: Can we do this? +RACHEL: Why don’t you um, check the copy room, maybe you left the contracts in there? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: You were there! +RACHEL: I thought you might be cold. +RACHEL: So my mother is not coming to my baby shower?! +RACHEL: Decaf cappucino for Joey. +RACHEL: You're just gonna have to get used to the fact that I will not be dating Ross. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: And then whoever does gets the phone. +RACHEL: You asked me that. +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Ok? +RACHEL: That was so awesome! +RACHEL: And I will see you tomorrow! +RACHEL: Seriously, I'm talking dirty stuff. +RACHEL: But you know, actually right before you picked me up, Ross and I had a, ah, little thing. +RACHEL: Shhhhh! +RACHEL: Oh, honey, oh that's OK. Yeah, because I was mad at you, not because I stopped loving you! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: James Brolin? +RACHEL: We hate her. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: II. +RACHEL: Come on, it’s not a big deal! +RACHEL: Oh wait, but I do want to be married for a year before I get pregnant. +RACHEL: Do you guys know any cute guys? +RACHEL: Look at that! +RACHEL: I got a touchdown! +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Both of them are here, both of them, both of them are here? +RACHEL: Well y’know, I don’t want you to be cold. +RACHEL: Yes I do, it's just that Ross is. +RACHEL: Not, two tickets, I have an extra ticket. +RACHEL: Oh, I love to ski! +RACHEL: That’s three years, that’s three whole years. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: JeanClaude she said yes, I'll see you tonight. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: You know, the money's great. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Of course! +RACHEL: She needs changing. +RACHEL: Ohhh look at that little girl ohhh. +RACHEL: Now, just to brief you I may cry, but they are not tears of sadness or of anger, but just of me having this discussion with you. +RACHEL: For what? +RACHEL: Oh my God, Oh my God, here comes Ross. +RACHEL: I think II, would you, actually, would you go check on that? +RACHEL: Hm-mmm. +RACHEL: Oh, God. +RACHEL: Umm, honey, look he just came over to. +RACHEL: Head Ross! +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: You’re gonna—This is your first grandchild! +RACHEL: No, I mean with us, you know. +RACHEL: Uh, he took the SAT's for me. +RACHEL: Oh, oh. +RACHEL: I said, No! +RACHEL: Don't make this harder than it already is! +RACHEL: What is the matter with us? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Is-is the cute blond guy delivering tonight? +RACHEL: Oh but you could. +RACHEL: Hello! +RACHEL: Oh, so, so, how was China, you? +RACHEL: My name is Rachel Green. +RACHEL: Goodbye, baby. +RACHEL: Yeah, well, that oughta do it. +RACHEL: I don't care. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Wait-wait a minute, what? +RACHEL: I’m not? +RACHEL: Oh my God, you stole her award! +RACHEL: Alright, just put your hands out and I'll back up into them. +RACHEL: But they’re funny to kids and who is it hurting?! +RACHEL: I was spoiled, self-centered and you guys really took care of me. +RACHEL: Well, you know, sometimes that helps. +RACHEL: We're all here now, please let us in so we can have some of your delicious turkey. +RACHEL: Oh that’s five Ross. +RACHEL: Well then honey, buy the lamp! +RACHEL: Okay, daddy we'll see you tomorrow night. +RACHEL: But Chandler the most important thing is you forgive yourself! +RACHEL: High-five, the babies are coming! +RACHEL: Alright. +RACHEL: How about at a Footlocker? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Almost. +RACHEL: Is that picture straight? +RACHEL: I had a wedding. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: It seems smaller somehow. +RACHEL: There's nobody here! +RACHEL: Credit. +RACHEL: No sense of personal space? +RACHEL: Ooh, Pheebs, what are you gonna say? +RACHEL: I can see that. +RACHEL: Go! +RACHEL: That’s gonna leave a stain! +RACHEL: Thank God. +RACHEL: Yes, but I, I think about who's apartment we're gonna sleep at tomorrow night and, and where we're gonna have dinner next Saturday night. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh, I think about the other day with you guys and I was all Oh, Paolo, he's so great, he makes me feel so. +RACHEL: Joey, do you have peanut butter on the back of your head? +RACHEL: I know, yeah, sorry. +RACHEL: Well, it is, all right? +RACHEL: I mean who does she think she is?! +RACHEL: So can we keep this between us? +RACHEL: I’ve never lived like this before. +RACHEL: Ross, there is no us, OK. No, listen to me. +RACHEL: Oh, and then, we got into this big, stupid fight. +RACHEL: I don't care, I'm not going anywhere. +RACHEL: Uhh, do you know what that silver knob on the toilet does? +RACHEL: Maybe somebody came in here and fixed it! +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Hi Joey, how ya doin’? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I would love to have a little. +RACHEL: Quality show cat! +RACHEL: I just don't know if the world is ready for you and your bag. +RACHEL: Pheebs, could you maybe hand me a cracker? +RACHEL: Will you stop calling it your apartment! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: You have! +RACHEL: I wiped tables for it, I steamed milk for it, and it was totally -not worth it. +RACHEL: Impressive. +RACHEL: It's worse than the thumb! +RACHEL: Oh I… No! +RACHEL: So I kissed the guy! +RACHEL: I mean you’re alone, alone. +RACHEL: Just when you thought that dude couldn't get any wierder. +RACHEL: No, I know, I know, and I'm sure your little boy is not going to grow up to be one. +RACHEL: Oh, I love him! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: And I missed it? +RACHEL: I don’t know Tag! +RACHEL: Okay, I thought it was about your neighbors liking you. +RACHEL: Hey uh Joe, would mind going over to Chandler's bedroom and get that book back that he borrowed from me? +RACHEL: I’m never gonna find anything. +RACHEL: Oh, I am just awful with children! +RACHEL: Five hours from now, shoop, shoop, shoop. +RACHEL: Urrrgh! +RACHEL: You are? +RACHEL: Okay, my turn! +RACHEL: So Chandler, have you heard about Monica's secret boyfriend? +RACHEL: Morgan! +RACHEL: I do not remember him! +RACHEL: Well y’know what they say, the 23rd time’s the charm. +RACHEL: No-no, no-no-no, very quiet, said with love, no yelling. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: That’s great. +RACHEL: I actually think I remember some of it, tu madre es loca. +RACHEL: Yeah, she’s gay. +RACHEL: You guys umm, I want you to meet Sebastian. +RACHEL: My Chinese food! +RACHEL: I know it's in the apartment, but I definitely lost it. +RACHEL: You, me, you know, Monica's mom. +RACHEL: Oh, you're not home. +RACHEL: We'll take Literature! +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: There you go. +RACHEL: Ooooh! +RACHEL: I spent my whole life like that. +RACHEL: That's it! +RACHEL: Ok. Baggage claim? +RACHEL: Just go take a walk, all right? +RACHEL: Should we send them something back? +RACHEL: Are you gonna let me play? +RACHEL: Thank you, thank you, thank you, Pheebs. +RACHEL: Sneeze muffin. +RACHEL: I got it from a bakery in New Jersey, Corino’s. +RACHEL: It goes ten times a day! +RACHEL: People were looking at us like we were crazy. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Okay, don’t listen to him. +RACHEL: Will all the stars be there? +RACHEL: So, we’ll just stay married. +RACHEL: Why would I have to sleep with you? +RACHEL: No-n-n-n-no! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Okay, uh-uh imagine this, The Mr. Bowmont. +RACHEL: Thanks! +RACHEL: Ok. through the glass doors. +RACHEL: I need you to stand near my head! +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: Ooh, let’s open them! +RACHEL: No, I stuff outside the bra. +RACHEL: My God, get a room! +RACHEL: I can’t believe they’ve been together for three years. +RACHEL: Ross and Charlie? +RACHEL: Nooo! +RACHEL: Oh, well, you know, they're just separated so, you know, never know, we'll see. +RACHEL: I just I don’t think us getting back together is a good idea. +RACHEL: And look, she made me carry her train, which was weird because I was Wonder Woman. +RACHEL: Ohh. +RACHEL: I doubt she’s even had time to. +RACHEL: What is my sister doing there?! +RACHEL: Oh, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Ok, doggie get the aahhh. +RACHEL: WhatPheebs?! +RACHEL: Well, we found a wallet, and we, the license? +RACHEL: With Ross and Jill? +RACHEL: Oh, it’s the best! +RACHEL: I can do this. +RACHEL: Those contracts absolutely had to go out today! +RACHEL: I'm sorry, honey, it's just that last week I got all but three answers and I really want to finish a whole one without any help. +RACHEL: Okay-okay that-that's amazing. +RACHEL: No you guys, I am not getting in a car with him, you’ll have to think of something else. +RACHEL: She's still with you? +RACHEL: Josh. +RACHEL: Do you wanna play football? +RACHEL: Okay Phoebe, we cannot tell anyone about this. +RACHEL: Oh, okay. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: No, there’s nothing to make up, she’s gonna know that I have a key to her office, I’ve got to get you locked up back the way you were! +RACHEL: Why not?! +RACHEL: When a guy breaks up with his girlfriend, what is an appropriate amount of time to wait before you make a move? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Last night! +RACHEL: So Joey, I just hooked Ross and Chandler up with some tuxedos for the wedding: do you need one? +RACHEL: Yeah, you’re right, I mean, we no, we have our fun. +RACHEL: Just give'em to me! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I’m serious! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Does it? +RACHEL: I mean I got news for you mister, Emma? +RACHEL: Wh, no, but y’know who did stop in here looking for ya, Tennille. +RACHEL: OK, I'm doin' it for ya. +RACHEL: Op! +RACHEL: I know, I remember that! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: We know what’s gonna work! +RACHEL: Slightly. +RACHEL: This is a work environment, she's your subordinate. +RACHEL: I cleaned! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I mean you can as involved as you want. +RACHEL: Get down? +RACHEL: Back later. +RACHEL: Oh well, yes, I can think of one good thing. +RACHEL: But, just come by at lunch so my boss doesn’t see you. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I'm the girl in the veil who stomped on your heart in front of your entire family!' +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Ok, bye! +RACHEL: Yeah, sure! +RACHEL: What do you think of that? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: You don’t get to keep the gifts. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Oh, and then afterwards you can take her to the Four Seasons for drinks. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Finally! +RACHEL: Yeah, I guess. +RACHEL: It's gonna be really late. +RACHEL: We still have this stupid obscene cake. +RACHEL: That's Monica! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: All right, you are settin’ sail up the Hudson! +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: You remember Joey? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Ross, I am telling you that she is using you to get back at me! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I am so gonna miss watching you freak people out like that! +RACHEL: And the fact that you were jeopardising my career never entered your mind?! +RACHEL: I think this is funny! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Ross is on a date with my sister and they shut the drapes two and a-half-hours ago. +RACHEL: Yeah, that was weird to me, too. +RACHEL: He’s in there! +RACHEL: Okay come on Phoebe, it’s nothing! +RACHEL: You know what I’m going to do? +RACHEL: Do you wanna wear my black jacket? +RACHEL: You're that many! +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: I mean God, by my sixth date with Paolo, I mean he had already named both my breasts! +RACHEL: I was laughing! +RACHEL: You guys this is so great! +RACHEL: Oh-oh! +RACHEL: Wh—Hey, I just gave you peeing on a stick. +RACHEL: I have Ross. +RACHEL: Anything from Crabtree amp Evelyn? +RACHEL: I was right. +RACHEL: How often do you read it? +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: Just one drink?! +RACHEL: But I would much rather go to the ball all by myself than go through anymore of this! +RACHEL: If-if-if one of you had to pick one of the other two guys to go out with, who would you pick? +RACHEL: Fine! +RACHEL: Ok! +RACHEL: Who is it?! +RACHEL: You're not an artist. +RACHEL: I mean was that just me? +RACHEL: You guys are unbelievable. +RACHEL: Of course I packed! +RACHEL: We?! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Okay guys, way to wish me luck! +RACHEL: So, you had a good day huh? +RACHEL: Yes hi, is Rachel there? +RACHEL: Thank God you’re here! +RACHEL: Joey, are you sure? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Okay, walk us through it, honey, walk us through it. +RACHEL: The naked old man is hula hooping! +RACHEL: I have the baby, and Ross is not gonna pick her up for another hour. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I am. +RACHEL: What is this? +RACHEL: Honey, listen, y'know what? +RACHEL: What's that? +RACHEL: You married a lesbian! +RACHEL: Oh hey look! +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: II do, do that. +RACHEL: Ross, I still can't forgive you for what you did, I can't, I just, but sometimes when I'm with you I just, I feel so. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Well, I'll probably be back to pick her up around six, but she's in the bedroom all ready to go. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Well, yeah. +RACHEL: Move on! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I really can't hear what she says come here. +RACHEL: I promise. +RACHEL: We're having a party. +RACHEL: Yes, I do. +RACHEL: Who is it? +RACHEL: Excellent! +RACHEL: This place is so overpriced. +RACHEL: Ohhhh, sorry I missed that. +RACHEL: Go! +RACHEL: It's ridiculous! +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: But I thought that ring stood for Caprice’s undying love for her brother. +RACHEL: Why, damnit, why did I open my mouth? +RACHEL: Well, but I'm not sure I really want to do anything about it. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I have a crush on you, and uh, and, and I know that's crazy because we work together, and-and nothing could ever happen, and the last thing I want to do is-is to freak you out or make you feel uncomfortable. +RACHEL: Oh come——Of course I know that. +RACHEL: Yeah it’s umm… Yeah it’s uh… It-it’s y’know—It’s nothing. +RACHEL: This is not good, we have to talk about this Joey thing. +RACHEL: Oh, that would be great! +RACHEL: I can’t go! +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: I see it now. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Frank and Alice are gonna want to keep all of their children! +RACHEL: That proposal, at the planetarium. +RACHEL: I mean y’know, she did always put. +RACHEL: Ok, ok, that's fine. +RACHEL: It's kinda hard though! +RACHEL: Heads I win, tails you lose. +RACHEL: So, what you have to do is, you have to accidentally run into her on purpose. +RACHEL: This-this happened when my grandfather died. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: We’re having a girl. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: He's not asking me out, because he wants me to ask him out. +RACHEL: You're decision. +RACHEL: Oh, well, actually we were just talking about me not going to. +RACHEL: Yeah, maybe. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I want the little round waffles. +RACHEL: I have never been so uncomfortable in my entire life! +RACHEL: You’re smoking? +RACHEL: There isn't. +RACHEL: No, it's not that. +RACHEL: You hang in there. +RACHEL: And then the night comes again. +RACHEL: Oh umm, y'know I lent it to Joey and I never actually got it back. +RACHEL: This isn’t funny! +RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry, did my back hurt your knife? +RACHEL: All right, okay, look, what if you could keep the apartment and get the tickets? +RACHEL: He still believes that what's in the inside is important. +RACHEL: This explains so much! +RACHEL: Hold on a second she's right here! +RACHEL: Y'know maybe he was going to open the door, but I totally miss read him and I uhhh. +RACHEL: When asked if you take initiative I wrote, Yes, he was able to unhook my bra with minimal supervision, and under Problems with Performance I wrote, Dear God, I hope not, and then uh, then I drew a little smiley face, and then a small pornographic sketch. +RACHEL: Oh, Pheebs, I don't even know where to start. +RACHEL: I mean it seems like yesterday they just got engaged. +RACHEL: Because I'm going to London. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Well why shouldn’t I?! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: I'm fine. +RACHEL: Oh Emma. +RACHEL: But if some guy who looks like Corey Haim wants to kiss me tonight, I'm sooo gonna let them! +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: They didn’t have any sodas? +RACHEL: Hey, so you guys, the funniest thing happened, at work. +RACHEL: Ok, well, not a problem. +RACHEL: It was one kiss, one guy, one time! +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh, you know what? +RACHEL: Now, maybe I would have a problem with this if it wasn’t for me and Joshua. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh, okay, we're going. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Sorry Barry. +RACHEL: Wow, oh my God, our child will be beaten to death in the schoolyard. +RACHEL: You are giving this a lot of thought. +RACHEL: Oh thank god, if Phoebe's going, can we please take Emma home? +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Oh, Mon. +RACHEL: But it was beautiful. +RACHEL: Don’t say, Oh my God! +RACHEL: I’m. +RACHEL: Then, no. +RACHEL: Oh, well then y’know what? +RACHEL: Bye. +RACHEL: Phoebes! +RACHEL: Um, but I, but I'm trying really hard. +RACHEL: Ohh that’s great! +RACHEL: I was reliving it. +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Okay, go to the left. +RACHEL: OK, well, you wouldn't let me finish and I was jus Ow. +RACHEL: I would check your hand but. +RACHEL: Ooh! +RACHEL: I meant, me plus one! +RACHEL: Pheebs, I would make a reservation for five, because one of us has to stay home and watch Emma. +RACHEL: Ok mom, you know what, fine, I'll make an appointment ok, but you know what, right now, I gotta go, I gotta go do a thing. +RACHEL: I cannot do this. +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: This is addressed to Mrs. Braverman downstairs. +RACHEL: Remember I got that uh, gala. +RACHEL: Oh my god. +RACHEL: You've learned some new moves! +RACHEL: Let me show you my underwear. +RACHEL: Yes oh——Do I want sugar in my coffee? +RACHEL: God. +RACHEL: Uh, Pheebs? +RACHEL: This is not, this is not a marriage! +RACHEL: Y’know what, II have to go talk to her, would you let me just get changed? +RACHEL: I am over you. +RACHEL: Yeah, I mean whatever. +RACHEL: We have to get food! +RACHEL: When you and Monica first hooked up, was it weird going from friends to, more than that? +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Or your mom? +RACHEL: Wait, you dropped a pea. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Thanks Chandler. +RACHEL: This is easy. +RACHEL: Cat, can't you at least smile or something?! +RACHEL: Look, maybe we should take a break. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: CHANDLER: Eddie, I didn't sleep with your ex-girlfriend. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Yeah, actually that’s my roommate’s. +RACHEL: Oh, Monica, where are you going to display Gladys oh so proudly? +RACHEL: And your horoscope says, On the fifth a special someone is going to give you a gift. +RACHEL: What, that scene I saw was so good! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Because you’re not finished yet and I won’t have it! +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah I like him a lot. +RACHEL: What’s that song? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Not this hospital, I’m going to sue you! +RACHEL: Thirsty huh? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Alright, Emma is napping, what happened to your shirt? +RACHEL: Wow, those things almost never come true. +RACHEL: Mum, please!I know you love your new lips, but I can barely understand you! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: It’s since you’ve never done it before you can be Monica’s made of honor. +RACHEL: Definitely, I want some of that. +RACHEL: Go over there and pretend you’re a sexual predator! +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: This is, this is not how this is supposed to happen. +RACHEL: We’re just really.very excited about this charity event that we have to go to. +RACHEL: ah ha ha. +RACHEL: Ya, know what Barr, I'm not gonna leave. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Well, we'll find something. +RACHEL: Whoa what? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Where did you get this? +RACHEL: There it is. +RACHEL: This was an amazing night. +RACHEL: Oh, no, Michael, it's not you. +RACHEL: Good night, Steve. +RACHEL: How did you get that? +RACHEL: Pie in the hood, pie in the hood. +RACHEL: Thanks. +RACHEL: Well, do you want to hear what actually happened or Joey’s lewd version? +RACHEL: Only like a month! +RACHEL: Ross, hey you know what might make it less boring? +RACHEL: You have to help me! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Maybe Monica used to use them with. +RACHEL: It's okay! +RACHEL: It's all done! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Gunther, Gunther, please, I've worked here for two and a half years, I know the empty trays go over there. +RACHEL: Did they mention that I'm rubber and you're glue? +RACHEL: We know what these are worth. +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Hey, can I ask you a question? +RACHEL: Well, he gets the other one all riled up. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: But I thought you just started dating that Kindergarten teacher. +RACHEL: During a blackout? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Yeah, and y’know you-you deserve to win. +RACHEL: Oh, Chandler how did you get through this? +RACHEL: Oh wow! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Yeah, I went to a wedding once where they had swing music and uh, two months later the couple got divorced. +RACHEL: Well no. +RACHEL: Ahh, yes, I will have a glass of the Merlot and uh, he will have a white wine spritzer. +RACHEL: I'd wait. +RACHEL: OK, well, you wouldn't let me finish and I was jus Ow. +RACHEL: And she's gonna be really needing these to keep an eye on that boyfriend, who, I hear, needs to keep his stapler in his desk drawer, if you know what I'm talking about. +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: No-no! +RACHEL: Yeah, III see the scare. +RACHEL: Ok. +RACHEL: Don’t! +RACHEL: Okay, twenty dollars. +RACHEL: Chandler, relax, Chandler, she'll be here. +RACHEL: Say it! +RACHEL: Oh, I love that but. +RACHEL: Can you help me clean this up? +RACHEL: I don’t know. +RACHEL: ROSS: Until now. +RACHEL: Right back at ya! +RACHEL: Okay, wait a minute, wait a minute, why are we so sure that this is a girl? +RACHEL: Oh, this is so cute. +RACHEL: Did you make any new friends? +RACHEL: Are we having an 89-year-old? +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: Ohh, there’s a picture of her in the yearbook actually. +RACHEL: Absolutely! +RACHEL: He and Monica dated when they broke up they couldn't even be in the same room together and you all promised that you would stay his friend and what happened? +RACHEL: Oh, thanks. +RACHEL: Oh, I know. +RACHEL: How do you know about that story?! +RACHEL: I mean you there. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Did uh, Ross call? +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Alright fine. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: We met at Thanksgiving. +RACHEL: Now I know why. +RACHEL: We cannot do it! +RACHEL: Why would you do that? +RACHEL: Oh, d'you like it? +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: I, I mean it was just this raw, animal, sexual. +RACHEL: Shhh! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: How could you not tell me you worked here? +RACHEL: Yeah, well it was. +RACHEL: C'mon Daddy, listen to me! +RACHEL: Well, Chandler said that it's really important to him too! +RACHEL: Yes I did! +RACHEL: I haven’t told him yet, so until I do I don’t think I should tell anybody else. +RACHEL: Okay, let's talk about it later, there comes security. +RACHEL: Would you stop being such a wuss? +RACHEL: Seriously, it's moving! +RACHEL: Barry and Mindy are getting a divorce! +RACHEL: I don’t know! +RACHEL: But, Phoebe made out with Ralph Lauren. +RACHEL: You just gotta relax, okay? +RACHEL: Oh God, Ross. +RACHEL: You remember when we got these? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: There were in the guest room closet behind some coats. +RACHEL: Oh, thank you so much for coming. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: What's with the rain, Geller? +RACHEL: Let’s go. +RACHEL: What do you say we umm. +RACHEL: See? +RACHEL: Oh, I think I saw some in here. +RACHEL: Do you have anything that would, get us out of them? +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: So that we would have something to talk about! +RACHEL: Well, I hope the ends of these sentences are good. +RACHEL: That refrigerators don’t live as long as people. +RACHEL: Well, I’m really sick of your smoking, so I brought something that is going to help you quit. +RACHEL: Oh my God, what!? +RACHEL: Uhmm, I think there was a restraunt, I know there was wine. +RACHEL: Why else would you still be single? +RACHEL: That is a, that is a second date, that’s what that is! +RACHEL: Yeah, say hey, you'll know this, what's the capital of Sweden? +RACHEL: If that doesn't work, you can wear my gray silk one. +RACHEL: Gunther, I quit. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: Ahhh… So this is fun, huh? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: That's great. +RACHEL: Are you kidding me? +RACHEL: Yes I am. +RACHEL: I don’t wanna hear Three failed marriages! +RACHEL: No, you wait. +RACHEL: No, she told me his name was Ken Adams. +RACHEL: You haven’t even told her you were a doctor, yet? +RACHEL: It's really not that big! +RACHEL: Oh you're not. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Alright well, now that I'm up I'm going to go to the bathroom. +RACHEL: Maybe I put it in here. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Hey, how's his dad? +RACHEL: Uh-huh, yeah I did, because I wore out my first copy when I was with you. +RACHEL: Just washing the windshield. +RACHEL: I don't have ten minutes! +RACHEL: Thank you so much for picking this up! +RACHEL: HEY! +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: But it-it kinda got erased. +RACHEL: No really, she didn't sleep well last night, so we can't wake her up. +RACHEL: Ross, I swear, I don’t know. +RACHEL: I really love your. +RACHEL: Ok, careful. +RACHEL: I don’t know! +RACHEL: Oh God, thank you soo much. +RACHEL: Well Chandler, what is this very weird, metal A Z thing? +RACHEL: Well, what are you guys doing tomorrow night? +RACHEL: where? +RACHEL: Hide my rings. +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Bye! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Is that you? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Every place I can afford comes with a roommate who is a freak. +RACHEL: I’m gonna have to find another minister. +RACHEL: What, how is it going with Drake? +RACHEL: Ewww, is that what that is? +RACHEL: She is? +RACHEL: Return them?! +RACHEL: Although when I was a kid, we did have a maid, but this is-this isn’t the same thing. +RACHEL: Yeah, my mom got my dad’s season tickets in the divorce, so she just gave them to me. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: You look great! +RACHEL: Phoebe, come on! +RACHEL: Well, if it makes you feel any better, I wish my date hadn't shown up. +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Female roommate, non-smoker, non-ugly. +RACHEL: Ralph and I were an item but were not anymore. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: So you know how to fix it? +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: Joey, Joey I am so sorry. +RACHEL: Well look at that, I’m just stroking your arm. +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Yeah but-but-but you liked me! +RACHEL: He's perfect, he's never been better. +RACHEL: Isn't it? +RACHEL: Did you call me? +RACHEL: It just doesn't matter how I feel. +RACHEL: Alright, I don't wanna alarm anybody, but Monica's hair is twice as big as it was when we landed! +RACHEL: I know, I know, I know, I know. +RACHEL: Okay, wait a minute. +RACHEL: I have a wonderful job! +RACHEL: I'm sorry, too! +RACHEL: I’m Monica’s maid of honor. +RACHEL: Not gonna find any clothes in there! +RACHEL: Oh honey, I'll say good-bye to you at the car if you don't mind the puss. +RACHEL: I'm sorry, they were just all coming at me, and I didn't know what to do. +RACHEL: Can you come here with me for a minute? +RACHEL: And uh, yeah, I didn’t really, I didn’t want to say anything, but it kinda it just, it kinda kept coming back to me, and umm, remember we were in the casino and for some reason thought it would be funny to eat a lot of grapes. +RACHEL: Ross I—We tried all the spicy food. +RACHEL: I mean it-it sounds like he’s a doctor, but he’s not. +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: I was watching this thing on TV this morning about. +RACHEL: The bathroom's up there. +RACHEL: I wanna see it. +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Well, I don’t know. +RACHEL: It's terrifying. +RACHEL: Oh yeah he's too cute to be straight. +RACHEL: I'm sorry, I was just thinking you're day could still pick up. +RACHEL: Oh? +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: So, he's on the show, he knows what happens. +RACHEL: I don't know! +RACHEL: I mean, look at this Wanted. +RACHEL: Let's take this into high gear. +RACHEL: Let’s face it, so far the guy’s not lovin’ ya! +RACHEL: He’s a real up-and-comer in Human Resources. +RACHEL: Then that way, you're the good guy and they're the bad guys. +RACHEL: Oh my God, I’m so sorry. +RACHEL: I'm just making margaritas. +RACHEL: Why didn't you just tell him about the mole I haven't got checked yet. +RACHEL: I don't. +RACHEL: All right, I got 48. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Well I love you too. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: But you know what? +RACHEL: He plays for the Yankees. +RACHEL: So Frank, three babies. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Problem solved, we are powering through. +RACHEL: Just need to relax all right? +RACHEL: Shoot, Dr. Schiff what kind of question is that?! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Forget Vail, forget seeing my family, forget shoop, shoop, shoop. +RACHEL: And you know which one we should see? +RACHEL: Yay! +RACHEL: Um, seven…e-e-eight, eight years. +RACHEL: Um, and I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Oh sorry, hold on. +RACHEL: Make love? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Ross did I ever tell you about the time that I went backpacking through Western Europe? +RACHEL: My child has no father! +RACHEL: You are ready to make a commitment! +RACHEL: So I don't think I should do it anymore. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Come feel this! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: It’s Relaxicab, like taxicab. +RACHEL: Oh, oh my God! +RACHEL: How are you? +RACHEL: That's all right. +RACHEL: It doesn’t happen to every guy! +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: And it's out of my system! +RACHEL: Tell him. +RACHEL: Yeah, come on! +RACHEL: Oh, Phoebe! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Ye-ah. +RACHEL: I don’t know. +RACHEL: Great. +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Okay, well let’s-let’s just have a look-see here. +RACHEL: It’s just…It’s just so sad! +RACHEL: I watched Monica bang his head against that thing! +RACHEL: And you are worse because you are sticking to your stupid snap judgement! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: No, wait Phoebe. +RACHEL: Yeah, I feel kinda bad for them, but I’m also really psyched ‘cause I don’t have to move in here! +RACHEL: I'm so sorry. +RACHEL: A card! +RACHEL: Yeah honey you don’t believe her do you? +RACHEL: Oh God Joey, ohh I’m my father. +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Were you just talking to yourself? +RACHEL: You like that huh? +RACHEL: Well, III've been on Standby for a flight home for hours. +RACHEL: She may need one. +RACHEL: Yep! +RACHEL: He's gonna flip out. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Listen, you know what? +RACHEL: I, I don’t know. +RACHEL: Look, I know what's going on here, okay, Mark explained it all to me. +RACHEL: I mean my Mom never thought this would work out. +RACHEL: She’s perfect. +RACHEL: Now, I don't know who's running for president or who that. +RACHEL: Y'know? +RACHEL: I should probably have the first of the three kids by the time I’m 35 which gives me five years. +RACHEL: We were on the sleeping porch! +RACHEL: Oh, well, I. +RACHEL: I’m fine! +RACHEL: You don't know the first thing about the stock market. +RACHEL: Oh, hi. +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: For just one great night, I mean is that really so…hard…to find. +RACHEL: Joey, come on! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: What, were you just never gonna tell me?! +RACHEL: What about Julie? +RACHEL: Oh, okay, not so weird. +RACHEL: Did you just say hi? +RACHEL: I'll go, I'll go! +RACHEL: What are you. +RACHEL: No, no, no, now wait, wa, wa, waa-it a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. +RACHEL: Monica and Chandler, gettin’ married. +RACHEL: But you know what? +RACHEL: You guys are gonna come and visit me, right? +RACHEL: Oh, well, I guess I had that one coming. +RACHEL: You cannot get the phone that way that’s not fair! +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: I got a really incredible job offer. +RACHEL: I'm not gonna gooo, so I think that will accomplish the not going. +RACHEL: I don't have a pot. +RACHEL: So umm, and that—we were at the Christmas party, and he got drunk, and he said to me, Rachel, I want to buy your baby. +RACHEL: I know, I know, and you were right Ross. +RACHEL: You kissed him? +RACHEL: It's Joshua. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Wait a minute. +RACHEL: We could read. +RACHEL: Hi you guys, oh my God! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I left my wallet here on purpose. +RACHEL: Umm. +RACHEL: I don't know! +RACHEL: Technical question, how do you know when uh, the butter’s done? +RACHEL: Chandler I’m telling you she has flipped out, she’s gone crazy! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Look, he said he’s not ready to date, so I had to invite him to a party if I wanted to see him outside of work, and now I have the perfect opportunity to seduce him! +RACHEL: Are you gonna call her! +RACHEL: You say that to kids?! +RACHEL: You can’t do th. +RACHEL: Her dancer friends? +RACHEL: Oh er, well you know Emma started crawling? +RACHEL: She's awake. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: So it might be the…the beginning of something. +RACHEL: What is it? +RACHEL: I guess you'd know that, being one of the two of us, though, right? +RACHEL: And I mean what’s 2? +RACHEL: We were walking by this antique store, and I saw this pin in the window, and I told him that it was just like one my grandmother had when I was a little girl. +RACHEL: And-and then guess what? +RACHEL: Joey? +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I don't care! +RACHEL: We won. +RACHEL: Yeah, this is Tag. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Who? +RACHEL: Oh, y-yeah, so, you-you love me! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Sandy, that's exactly what it is. +RACHEL: Oh my god. +RACHEL: Okay, that sounds fair. +RACHEL: OH! +RACHEL: I don't wanna mess this up again. +RACHEL: Y’know, ever since I got pregnant II have the strongest maternal instincts. +RACHEL: And I hit my head on the kerb and cut my lip on my whistle oh everybody having fun at the party? +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: I write the specials on the specials board, and, uh, and I, uh. +RACHEL: Oh, sorry, it's my phone. +RACHEL: Hey-hey-hey-oh-oh! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Settle down. +RACHEL: I mean what if she gets you a. +RACHEL: Well y’know, it’s you guys. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Okay mommy, don’t ever leave me. +RACHEL: Emma! +RACHEL: Hi, this is my friend Rachel. +RACHEL: I just went to your building and you weren't there and then this guy with a big hammer said you might be here and you are, you are! +RACHEL: Eh-eh-according to my plan I should already be with the guy I wanna marry! +RACHEL: You're not related. +RACHEL: I mean, is it supposed to be this, difficult? +RACHEL: Ohh whoops. +RACHEL: I am freaking out! +RACHEL: Isn’t that, isn’t that weird? +RACHEL: Okay fine! +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: So you were in an I Hate Rachel club? +RACHEL: OK. +RACHEL: It's Louisa! +RACHEL: Plus, you know, he is with Charlie now. +RACHEL: Because I do. +RACHEL: When I thought you wanted sex in exchange for this job, I said no. +RACHEL: So Mac and C. H. E. E. S. E. Huh. +RACHEL: So I’m gonna go through the hotel and see if there’s any other weddings going on. +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: Oh please, what do you know! +RACHEL: You guys wanna get some coffee? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: People are trying to sleep in here! +RACHEL: Okay, so do you want to pay attention or do you want to die?! +RACHEL: How you doin'? +RACHEL: Oh my… God. +RACHEL: Oh wow, eight hours? +RACHEL: You guys are so lucky you are here with people, you known it's such a romantic place. +RACHEL: Not great. +RACHEL: I got it! +RACHEL: You are a very scary witch. +RACHEL: Who wrote it? +RACHEL: What else? +RACHEL: There’s no tissue! +RACHEL: A big idiot. +RACHEL: OH MY GOD IT'S BRUSSELS SPROUTS. +RACHEL: How are you? +RACHEL: Well of course I will watch him! +RACHEL: One minute I'm holding Ben like a football, the next thing I know, I've got two kids, I'm living in Scarsdale complaining about the taxes. +RACHEL: Forgotten. +RACHEL: No no no no no. +RACHEL: Umm…that kiss before we left the apartment. +RACHEL: C'mon you guys, I don't care, I have a date tonight. +RACHEL: From, you know, the rain. +RACHEL: Hi Emma. +RACHEL: You pierced her ears!? +RACHEL: But Joey, I don’t think Ross wants me to move into his apartment and disrupt his life like that. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Then, again at 9:00? +RACHEL: Well hello! +RACHEL: So Pheebs, what are you going to do with your 3? +RACHEL: But this is, fine. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Uh-huh, I get it, smoke, chimney, chimney sweep, very funny, ha-ha. +RACHEL: I thought you were in your room? +RACHEL: As a woman there is nothing sexier than a man who does not want to have sex. +RACHEL: Oh, I just don't want to be 30 and still work here. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: What did I just do? +RACHEL: No-no, but’s never good! +RACHEL: I’m not! +RACHEL: You will like it! +RACHEL: OK, we're not supposed to take these when we leave. +RACHEL: Y’know who doesn’t even like dirty movies? +RACHEL: I doooo. +RACHEL: Y'know, it's like all I'm doing is running back and forth from the huddle. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I’m sorry, Rosita? +RACHEL: From Bloomingdales? +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Please, let me! +RACHEL: Joey, it's okay. +RACHEL: How much longer? +RACHEL: It's probably like two dollars for the first contraction, and then fifty cents for each additional contraction. +RACHEL: I didn’t uh, really have time to read this part of the books, but do you think we have time to. +RACHEL: And I said Wait a minute! +RACHEL: So, which of these babies do you think is the ugliest? +RACHEL: You have the best taste in men! +RACHEL: A week ago, two weeks ago, I was fine. +RACHEL: Oh, little ‘X’s! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: No need! +RACHEL: Honey, you're taking this the wrong way. +RACHEL: Yeah, II heard. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: There's nothing really left to say except. +RACHEL: I guess the flea market was just better last time. +RACHEL: Chandler, you have just described virtually every man that we have ever gone out with. +RACHEL: You dated my sister! +RACHEL: Oh, he sees her! +RACHEL: Fine, I won't use it! +RACHEL: Uh Dan, Monica. +RACHEL: And I haven’t taught him anything that a normal 6-year-old doesn’t know anyway! +RACHEL: No I take that back! +RACHEL: Well, I usually go, play Tetris on somebody else's computer. +RACHEL: It kicked once, it’ll kick again! +RACHEL: At-at the view. +RACHEL: It was one night, senior year we went to a party, had a lot of sangria and y’know, ended up…kissing for a bit. +RACHEL: No honey, we're sorry, we didn't mean it. +RACHEL: Oh wait a minute, I know. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: We have to have this. +RACHEL: So now that you guys all know you can help me. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh, I have to pee. +RACHEL: Uh-uh-uh, right now? +RACHEL: Okay, Pheebs, you look in the kitchen, I will look in the back. +RACHEL: That is seven days! +RACHEL: And Joey. +RACHEL: Ohh, okay, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Do we have to tell her? +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Oh, how'd she take it? +RACHEL: Mon, if uh you were at lunch alone, how come it cost you uh 53 dollars? +RACHEL: Judy! +RACHEL: You mean the one that you’re wearing? +RACHEL: I mean with Barry, it was, it was safe, and it was easy, but there was no heat. +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hey, you. +RACHEL: For like a half an hour! +RACHEL: Well, I’m sorry, I thought you needed them! +RACHEL: Hey, what's-what's going on?! +RACHEL: Seriously, what’s wrong with the dog?! +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: I get to hire my own assistant! +RACHEL: Ok, we have tenderness, we have intimacy, we connect. +RACHEL: What!? +RACHEL: Hey, look at that, the airport's moving. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: It’s so nice to meet you. +RACHEL: I guess. +RACHEL: Look, that night was the one wild thing I have ever done in my entire life, and I’m not gonna let you take that away from me! +RACHEL: You’re Bonnie? +RACHEL: It's a uh, regatta gala. +RACHEL: Is it scary? +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: We'll have, we'll have a big party, and no-one'll know who's with who. +RACHEL: Okay, did anybody just hear that? +RACHEL: So, did you shave your legs? +RACHEL: Joey…there’s something that you…should know. +RACHEL: No, actually first they started on my waist. +RACHEL: YOU! +RACHEL: I mean it’s what? +RACHEL: Call her now! +RACHEL: We ordered a fat-free crust with extra cheese. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: I guess it's not about no guys, it's about the right guy you know? +RACHEL: I’m just gonna throw it out, it’s probably just a bunch of shampoo and. +RACHEL: Just so you know, it’s not that common! +RACHEL: Just sex, y’know? +RACHEL: Um-hmm. +RACHEL: He cannot come. +RACHEL: Seriously, proud of you. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Kind of like a fairy tale for the digital age. +RACHEL: All right, come on, let’s go get your coat. +RACHEL: What did you just say? +RACHEL: Oh no Dr. Long, please come in. +RACHEL: The bll is drrbing! +RACHEL: Yeah, see ya. +RACHEL: Ooh! +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: The police! +RACHEL: I'm so sorry, you guys. +RACHEL: Ross, you had sex with another woman! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Y’know, you think you’re making progress at work and then your boss calls you Raquel. +RACHEL: Well, y'know, a little of this, a little of that. +RACHEL: And a crappy New Year. +RACHEL: Can you imagine if there was?! +RACHEL: Alright, fill me in! +RACHEL: Since when do take naps in that position. +RACHEL: All right, this is it! +RACHEL: No, I know! +RACHEL: Is he here? +RACHEL: Okay, then y'know what? +RACHEL: Yeah, this looks great. +RACHEL: Ohh, I went to Joey and Chandler's last night! +RACHEL: Ross, say something. +RACHEL: But your divorce isn't even final yet. +RACHEL: Wow, a Swedish massage from a real Swedish person. +RACHEL: Hey, can I write you a check? +RACHEL: That is a boy's apartment, it's dirty and it smells. +RACHEL: Oh, no no no no. +RACHEL: I really want to be with the kids right now. +RACHEL: And not one of your coupons for an hour of Joey Love. +RACHEL: There’s a million other guys out there, you just. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: That I know, this is from White Plains. +RACHEL: And y’know who should’ve shut their drapes? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Ross, please! +RACHEL: I’m a total pro! +RACHEL: Anymore! +RACHEL: The whole night was horrible, it was pouring down rain, and when I got there, there was no Rachel Green on the list, but there was a Rachel Greep. +RACHEL: I mean that's unbelievable. +RACHEL: I’m gonna do this, I’m gonna tell him, I’m gonna be strong. +RACHEL: Oh my goodness, she had the smoothest skin! +RACHEL: Look honey, Mark is in fashion okay, I like having a friend that I can share this stuff with. +RACHEL: Guys, you're not gonna believe this! +RACHEL: What what what what? +RACHEL: It’s just so frustrating! +RACHEL: My new Paolo shoes! +RACHEL: I'm so sorry! +RACHEL: See uh my-my boss and his wife—They-they can’t have children. +RACHEL: My birthday's not for another month! +RACHEL: you were 50 minutes late to the class, what did you crawl there?! +RACHEL: Oh honey, I'm so proud of you, Min. +RACHEL: The millionaire’s here! +RACHEL: Yeah, y'know II think I'm just gonna hang out in my room. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Heeeeey, where have you been? +RACHEL: Well, it’s a long story, but umm I broke Joey’s chair. +RACHEL: Okay, don’t be mad at me, but I couldn’t resist. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Please, they've been going out a week. +RACHEL: Y'know the Wouldn't it be great if she was my wife Rachel. +RACHEL: But I’m not, I’m not looking for a husband. +RACHEL: It's All Relative! +RACHEL: II, got a job at Ralph Lauren. +RACHEL: Yes-yes, just a few seconds and she'd still be with us nothing about an assistant buyer? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh, ju-ju-just stay calm. +RACHEL: But, none of that compared to how kind and-and how gentle and thoughtful he is. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: You? +RACHEL: You know when people hear about our situation they. +RACHEL: What's the matter? +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Oh I'm sorry Gavin. +RACHEL: Honey, it’s going to be okay. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Yes, uh I’m sorry the models are actually down the hall. +RACHEL: I know, isn't he great? +RACHEL: Jill this is not about me being jealous of you! +RACHEL: It's like that time they promoted Sandra over me at work. +RACHEL: Oh, Italy, I think? +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Well, I thought you liked doing it. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: I'm telling you something you already know! +RACHEL: Y'know, it didn't mean anything, it's just a mistake. +RACHEL: Here. +RACHEL: Uhmm, well actually I'm already done, but I, I kinda got plans. +RACHEL: Oh God, you think I made out with him. +RACHEL: That’s shocking! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Why are why are you so tanned? +RACHEL: Come on, Monica, let’s go to lunch. +RACHEL: And he seems to like you so much. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Here you go. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Trust me, it was actually, it was very funny. +RACHEL: Well, um. +RACHEL: Sophisticated like a hooker? +RACHEL: Earrings! +RACHEL: One and a half carat easy. +RACHEL: Okay, what’s your name? +RACHEL: I can’t. +RACHEL: Yeah I don’t think dressing provocatively is going to help me here! +RACHEL: Well, I tried, but then he had a shampoo related emergency. +RACHEL: All right, y'know what I think he's bored. +RACHEL: Thank you for coming with me today. +RACHEL: Well, hey, maybe I've got one at home, or in Scarsdale. +RACHEL: Right! +RACHEL: Screw it, I didn't get it! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Chandler! +RACHEL: But if Grunts uncomprehensively. +RACHEL: I'm just bummed about the way I left things with Ross. +RACHEL: You remember Ross. +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: Ross, my father doesn't hate you. +RACHEL: Ow ow ow. +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Y’know, sometimes you can do everything right, everyone can wear everything they’re supposed to wear, and one of those little guys just gets through! +RACHEL: No-no-no-no! +RACHEL: Well, I didn't get the job at Gucci and I got fired from Ralph Lauren. +RACHEL: Ugh, it was just a matter of time before someone had to leave the group. +RACHEL: And besides y'know, I don't, I don't go for guys right after they get divorced. +RACHEL: Maybe! +RACHEL: Whatever I was feeling, I'm, not. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: You brought candy! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Petty. +RACHEL: Just keep walkin'! +RACHEL: I believe you. +RACHEL: And do you know how you find him? +RACHEL: Ohh, well, isn't that just lovely. +RACHEL: Hi officer, was I going a little too fast? +RACHEL: Ross I’m so sorry. +RACHEL: Oh good God! +RACHEL: Sweety, I gotta tell ya, it sounds a little bit like you like the apartment more than you like. +RACHEL: Well you better. +RACHEL: it’s gonna be okay! +RACHEL: See just I'm right back where I started! +RACHEL: He said, Rachel, I can’t do this. +RACHEL: You mean they’re not coming to a social event where there’s no men and there’s no booze?! +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Oh Ross, come on! +RACHEL: You never gonna believe it: she called. +RACHEL: No, I mean it! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Can't do this! +RACHEL: Emergency! +RACHEL: Rome. +RACHEL: Well, yeah! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: So Mon, when are we gonna meet this new secret waiter man? +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: I watch you everyday! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh don’t even ask! +RACHEL: I’m gonna get something pierced. +RACHEL: It doesn't happen to every guy! +RACHEL: We’ll nod along. +RACHEL: What, hey! +RACHEL: Honey, you deserve true love. +RACHEL: You gotta hold my hand! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Is that a beer bong for a baby? +RACHEL: Well neither do I! +RACHEL: So just go distract him. +RACHEL: Sorry, I thought you were talking to me. +RACHEL: Shake it off. +RACHEL: So long as I understand that the money should not construed as a down payment on this or any other child I should bear. +RACHEL: I mean you definitely should do that. +RACHEL: ROSS: Really? +RACHEL: All right, okay, Laurie proposes to Jo, and she says no, even though she's still in love with him, and then he ends up marring Amy. +RACHEL: I got the tickets! +RACHEL: Hur, hur hur, he doesn t speak much English. +RACHEL: Ugh, Monica, I know about you and Chandler. +RACHEL: Still pretending he’s not interested. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: How do you do that? +RACHEL: It's just physical and I have it totally under control! +RACHEL: So what're you saying, I mean, you're saying that like, there's nothing between us animal at all I mean there's not even like, uhm, a little animal, not even not even like, like chipmunk sex?RACHEL: Ok, Ross, try to hear me. +RACHEL: See when-when you put it that way y'know it does sort of. +RACHEL: Her purse?! +RACHEL: Yeah, I did, but y'know what? +RACHEL: Mark, I need you! +RACHEL: I'm so sad! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Ugh, Ross! +RACHEL: OK. Ross, please don't hate me. +RACHEL: And for what? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Because, I don't care. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: ALL RIGHT! +RACHEL: Saran Wrap on the toilet seat, you don’t think that’s just a little funny?! +RACHEL: So I get to see what Joey Tribbiani is like on a date. +RACHEL: Okay, well umm, I'm gonna go look at my books! +RACHEL: Just take cat, leave the money, and run away! +RACHEL: Oh I cannot believe those two! +RACHEL: Well it's not, honey I'm sorry, I guess I'm just nervous. +RACHEL: Oh, great could you make me four copies of those? +RACHEL: Excuse me? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: We do not a changing table! +RACHEL: Ohhh, OK. Maybe it was just the kind of story where you have to be there. +RACHEL: Hello Ross, this is Dr. McNeeley from the Fake Accent University, we’d like you to come on board with us full time! +RACHEL: So close! +RACHEL: Well, well, what did you do to make her laugh? +RACHEL: I’m sorry your wife is gay. +RACHEL: Joey, is what she just said umm. +RACHEL: This is gonna be bridesmaid central, all right? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Great set tonight Phoebs. +RACHEL: You lent me Monica's earrings?! +RACHEL: Ah, this is my last night working here, and I ah, just wanted say that I made some really good friends working here, and ah, it's just time to move on. +RACHEL: Paolo's catching an earlier flight. +RACHEL: Well? +RACHEL: In her house? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Okay, well, I'm gonna clear out some of these boxes. +RACHEL: I got my girls. +RACHEL: Who is the blonde, she's pretty. +RACHEL: So, um, did she. +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: Eh, just a tad. +RACHEL: I am Porsching around. +RACHEL: Then what's that big lump under your covers? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Because it's Richard's son! +RACHEL: Excuse me? +RACHEL: All right, fine! +RACHEL: Ow ow ow. +RACHEL: I think you don’t want them to see you begging me. +RACHEL: Hey, come on! +RACHEL: Well, maybe that’s, maybe that’s really brave. +RACHEL: It is true! +RACHEL: Oh, okay, I can't find it, but I remember that I was in seat 32C, because that's my bra-size. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: I mean, it's all my fault! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I mean we’re not, we’re not gonna live together anymore? +RACHEL: Umm, I uh, I kinda have a little confession. +RACHEL: Julie, isn't that great? +RACHEL: Honey, this is not your fault, just because you guys had a fight, it does not justify her sleeping with someone. +RACHEL: Oh that's so cute: Ross and Mike's first date. +RACHEL: I’m serious, I really, I think I need just to have some, meaningless, sex y'know, with the next guy that I see. +RACHEL: Oh, a little. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, I've done that. +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: Huh, yeah I guess we are roommates now. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Woah, look at that! +RACHEL: La. +RACHEL: They-they don’t have a marriage license, they don’t have any witnesses, and the groom only has on one shoe! +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: Because they're people. +RACHEL: Make it stop! +RACHEL: And, I’ll be nice. +RACHEL: I can’t. +RACHEL: Hey, what have you guys been up to? +RACHEL: Well, now, wait. +RACHEL: Oh my God, this is horrible! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: I’m Monica, I don’t get phone messages from interesting people. +RACHEL: And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? +RACHEL: You? +RACHEL: Well then how about I call your supervisor and I tell her that you shot my friend in the ass with a dart? +RACHEL: and then they came back from smoking and they had made all of the decisions without me! +RACHEL: 'Kay. +RACHEL: God, and now I just can’t stop picturing with her, I can’t, it doesn’t matter what you say, or what you do, Ross. +RACHEL: But the way you owned up to everything, it just showed me how much you've grown. +RACHEL: Ew! +RACHEL: Everything you need to know is in that first kiss. +RACHEL: I wanna go over there, grab him, and kiss him! +RACHEL: That's right! +RACHEL: I don't know, I don't know. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: I was looking for you before. +RACHEL: What, is everything ok? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh, I know, I know, the odds are against us, but somebody has to win, and it could be us! +RACHEL: You know, it is weird that Phoebe would set me up on a date that was awful on the same night that Joey set you up on a date that didn't even show. +RACHEL: In case you didn’t notice, that is a scary man. +RACHEL: Good day for married people huh? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: This is Josh. +RACHEL: Hey, listen Ronnie, how long would you say Chandler's been in the shower? +RACHEL: I mean, this is so cool! +RACHEL: Uhhhooo. +RACHEL: Honey, you have principles and I so admire that! +RACHEL: Ok, good-bye you guys. +RACHEL: 14? +RACHEL: How long do cats live? +RACHEL: Okay, well this is all very impressive Hilda, um I just have one last question for you. +RACHEL: My God! +RACHEL: Yeah, honey, I’m sorry, but I don’t think that was a romantic thing. +RACHEL: One more time from the top. +RACHEL: Yeah, maybe. +RACHEL: Oh oh! +RACHEL: Oh, could somebody give me a hand with this zipper? +RACHEL: Oh, she does want to. +RACHEL: You know? +RACHEL: Oh, thank you. +RACHEL: Okay?! +RACHEL: I hate the fact that this place still smells like bird! +RACHEL: So then. +RACHEL: Or, fire them? +RACHEL: Oh no, at the Grammies I always win. +RACHEL: Did you bring her up here to get back at me? +RACHEL: But y’know, there is one thing that I have yet to evaluate. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Nice try, but you don’t get that chair anymore! +RACHEL: Y’know, I’m still 29 in Guam. +RACHEL: Well, then so you just invite me.! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: I get the phone. +RACHEL: Okay, so just spoke to the nurse and the reason that your doctor is late is because uh, she's not coming. +RACHEL: Alright, alright. +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: I mean, like in the case of this young woman, she has lost her clothes, so she rides naked on the horse, she’s crying out, ‘Where are they, where are they?’ You see, now, I would date this girl. +RACHEL: This isn't funny anymore. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: I’m gonna get fired! +RACHEL: Ohhh. +RACHEL: I'll call ya! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I really do. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: I have. +RACHEL: Phoebe’s gonna be here any second, she cannot see this! +RACHEL: But she did give us some ideas on how to induce labor. +RACHEL: Uh-huh, doing it. +RACHEL: You're gonna lose your job! +RACHEL: Are you kidding?! +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Sucker! +RACHEL: And sorta just put the receipt back in your pocket. +RACHEL: Please, come on we do not have any of the big stuff we need! +RACHEL: Is this a little too. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Ross abandoned me! +RACHEL: Tell him I'd come to the phone, but my ankles are weighin' me down. +RACHEL: Because there’s this really cute shoe store that has like this little. +RACHEL: No you don’t know why! +RACHEL: Oh, you know what - my first impression of you was absolutely right. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, I just really, uh, I just really need to not be with you right now. +RACHEL: God, oh God Monica, I forgot. +RACHEL: Kiss me please. +RACHEL: No no no no no. +RACHEL: This is the only dessert and if I screw it up everybody's gonna be like. +RACHEL: I'm getting pretty good at this! +RACHEL: Please. +RACHEL: With ah, extra anchovies. +RACHEL: Well, obviously I think so too. +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: Enjoy your half my friend, but that is it. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: No? +RACHEL: Ross, no! +RACHEL: Ah, so this is a half-caf, double tall, easy hazel nut, non-fat, no foam, with whip, extra hot latte, right? +RACHEL: Man in the black dress… Hi! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: We wanna hear everything. +RACHEL: That's OK! +RACHEL: Honey, honey, I'm sorry, I know it's our anniversary but I told you on the phone I don't have time to stop. +RACHEL: Did I miss it? +RACHEL: Oh my gosh there’s something every mother needs, a giant stuffed gorilla that takes up the entire apartment! +RACHEL: Nothing! +RACHEL: I don’t think I have the energy for this. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: No, I’m not. +RACHEL: Oh no-no-no! +RACHEL: Joshua came into work today, and guess what happened? +RACHEL: It's Joshua. +RACHEL: Well, y'know what, that doesn't matter. +RACHEL: Umm, did you send those contracts to Milan? +RACHEL: My God! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I can’t let him go out that way, he’s got a meeting. +RACHEL: I’m just going to grab the phone. +RACHEL: But, I already told Mr. Waltham that I would take his niece to this dumb old opera. +RACHEL: Okay, no, that's not the right decision. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh, wait and on the nineteenth a secret crush announces itself. +RACHEL: Well, let's see, uh. +RACHEL: Now that she broke up with you? +RACHEL: And uh, the-the uh, wildness of the moors, which I think is-is mirrored in the wildness of Heathcliff's character. +RACHEL: I mean, that was really embarrassing what happened to you! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Yeah that’s great Paul, but y’know I wanna know what. +RACHEL: You give me back my sweater or it's handbag marinara. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Oh Ross, you're so great! +RACHEL: Well, there is one thing that we haven’t tried, but someone thinks that, That will open up a can of worms. +RACHEL: He should not get back together with her. +RACHEL: Honey, no one thinks you’re a pansy, but we do think you need a tissue. +RACHEL: Can you not look at me when I say this? +RACHEL: Give me one good reason we shouldn't try him out. +RACHEL: Give him the sandwich! +RACHEL: No, I'm saying. +RACHEL: Yeah, well, word of advice: Bring back the comedian. +RACHEL: That’s nice. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Well, I guess it was Cupid who brought her here. +RACHEL: Okay, I know it doesn’t sound like anything, but I swear it works. +RACHEL: Well-well a little blind sided but y’know good. +RACHEL: Come on you guys! +RACHEL: I did. +RACHEL: The selection of underwear we carry. +RACHEL: Awe! +RACHEL: You're hurt! +RACHEL: No, Phoebs, I'm dating Russ. +RACHEL: Do you ski? +RACHEL: Who are we spying on? +RACHEL: Do you wanna try some of them on for me? +RACHEL: It's not the time Charlie. +RACHEL: And then, I don't know, I mean you'd pull me really close to you so that, so that I'd be pressed up, you know, right against you. +RACHEL: You see? +RACHEL: That sounds like a plan. +RACHEL: How could you not tell me that she has hair? +RACHEL: Ohh, Phoebe I love you. +RACHEL: What are you doing over there? +RACHEL: Maybe it's not so bad. +RACHEL: Ok? +RACHEL: Me? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Okay wait! +RACHEL: When I was a little girl I had a little pink pony named Cotton. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Everybody hide! +RACHEL: Alright, enough, enough, come on. +RACHEL: Cah. +RACHEL: Well, I've been better. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: We are not going anywhere! +RACHEL: You are. +RACHEL: Hm-mmm! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: This might be Joey’s baby, who knows? +RACHEL: So, got any advice? +RACHEL: And he said really mean things that were only partly true. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, Joey broke it. +RACHEL: Um, there was a Geller Cup? +RACHEL: Oh man, I swear if they sold these at Pottery Barn… Hi! +RACHEL: Ugh. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Hey Ross, you know, I think we had a moment before. +RACHEL: I’m not gonna screw it up! +RACHEL: So I was hoping you and I could have a. +RACHEL: Okay, but if it only happened that one time, how come we found your underwear in our apartment the other day? +RACHEL: Ed Begley Jr. is not gay. +RACHEL: Okay look Mr. Zelner. +RACHEL: Well, he's coming from Jersey, he said he would get here as fast as he could! +RACHEL: Who did I just put as my In case of emergency call person? +RACHEL: Monica Geller. +RACHEL: Will, right? +RACHEL: Oh God, oh God, oh God oh God oh God oh God. +RACHEL: Oh, no sit-ups today Tag? +RACHEL: I’m the only daughter dad is proud of! +RACHEL: No, not really. +RACHEL: I have a dentist! +RACHEL: Shoot. +RACHEL: Especially after Monica just went on and on and on about it! +RACHEL: My pony was sick. +RACHEL: What else you got?! +RACHEL: I’m so exited! +RACHEL: Am I ruining my life? +RACHEL: I had a traumatic, swing incident, when I was little. +RACHEL: Y'know? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Well then why did you give me a ring? +RACHEL: Ah, it’s still not the time. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Honey I swear it we just kissed. +RACHEL: I can barely use chopsticks. +RACHEL: We are living outside the law! +RACHEL: Thanks, you can just put it on the table. +RACHEL: How are you doing this? +RACHEL: I’m sorry that I lied to you before. +RACHEL: I don’t even know how to use my keycard. +RACHEL: I should go to the hospital! +RACHEL: Come on, they were not that huge. +RACHEL: Anyway, I was thinking about renting Cujo sometime. +RACHEL: So hot I cried myself to sleep last night. +RACHEL: Oh, I can give you that. +RACHEL: Oh Gosh! +RACHEL: Full, dry, on its back, and no loose covers. +RACHEL: I don't even know what department that guy's in. +RACHEL: Ohh. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Go! +RACHEL: I have a little thing for him. +RACHEL: I've got a great job at Bloomingdale's, have wonderful friends, and eventhough I'm not seeing anyone right now, I've never felt better about myself. +RACHEL: Ohhhh! +RACHEL: Y’know, he thinks I’m some kind of a soap opera nut—Which I’m not! +RACHEL: No I, no Ross is not a geek! +RACHEL: Good! +RACHEL: It’s funny. +RACHEL: What are you talking about?! +RACHEL: I won’t boss you around. +RACHEL: Who you think you are? +RACHEL: No, it's all right, you can just drop the act Tommy. +RACHEL: I'm sure you don't want to get my chicken disease! +RACHEL: What're you guys doing out here? +RACHEL: Wh-wh-what? +RACHEL: Hey, y’know who doesn’t have to job hunt? +RACHEL: I. Yeah, okay. +RACHEL: As long as you don't mind that she's haunted. +RACHEL: You know, I just, couple of things I tried. +RACHEL: I went, I went after Ross in stupid London. +RACHEL: Did you watch the tape? +RACHEL: II saw Barry today. +RACHEL: You and Ralph? +RACHEL: Okay, I couldn't get a plane out, so I had to stay in their honeymoon suite with people coming up to me all the time going, Oh, Mrs. Geller, why are you crying? +RACHEL: All right, who would uh, like some yams? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: And. +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Well, well, well, look what mommy found! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I still can't believe you invited Gavin. +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Oh, I know, I know, it’s-it’s so, it’s so totally like, Whoa! +RACHEL: How does going to a strip club help him better? +RACHEL: Oh I know, my God, this is so, this rice is so, I am so good. +RACHEL: He was married to me a hell of a lot longer than he was married to Emily, he just didn’t tell me. +RACHEL: Looks, she’s a little dare-devil! +RACHEL: I would loooove… So uh, so where is sweet little Ben? +RACHEL: Over here! +RACHEL: But he has to know how I feel! +RACHEL: Come on, this isn’t funny. +RACHEL: But you hate sticking your finger in your eye! +RACHEL: Oh honey, I'm sorry we can't help you there, 'cause we're cuddlily sleepers. +RACHEL: Wow, this is so much better than I… Oh! +RACHEL: Yeah, I mean, you know it, I mean, if it were me I, I, you know, I'd want you to, I don't know, like catch me off guard, you know, with like a really good kiss, you know really, sort of um, soft at first, then maybe um brush the hair away from my face, and look far into my eyes in a way that let's me know that something amazing is about to happen. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Nooo! +RACHEL: You think it's easy for me to see you with Julie? +RACHEL: They took Ben to the park. +RACHEL: Aw, Mon. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I would love to live with you Ross that’s-that’s great! +RACHEL: Sorry! +RACHEL: I definitely did not see that one backfiring! +RACHEL: But, but, Mona, I live here. +RACHEL: It's forty five. +RACHEL: I love this plate! +RACHEL: I’m telling you I’m quitting! +RACHEL: You stole them from me! +RACHEL: Josh, these are my friends, and that's Ross. +RACHEL: Open it! +RACHEL: Get out! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Judy! +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: We both grabbed for the last Field amp Stream. +RACHEL: That's going to make them think they can come over here. +RACHEL: No, what's he like? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: You want me to just call him up and tell him that you're seeing him instead? +RACHEL: Huh? +RACHEL: Right, you, you only had a year. +RACHEL: Yeah it was. +RACHEL: Oh my God, this is the best cheesecake I have ever had. +RACHEL: What if we got married? +RACHEL: I mean I don’t really like it when Ross goes out with anyone, but my sister isn’t that like incest or something?! +RACHEL: Dina? +RACHEL: It's the woman from the hospital admissions office. +RACHEL: IIII’m just…I’m just a good kisser! +RACHEL: Well, it gets worse. +RACHEL: And, uh, oh, you wear too much of that gel in your hair. +RACHEL: Noo! +RACHEL: And Chandler, you’re gonna have to watch those long showers you take in the morning because you know Raquel can’t be late. +RACHEL: You are such a loser! +RACHEL: I mean, is it really so terrible? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Phoebe, it's me. +RACHEL: Whoa, wait! +RACHEL: I’m just visiting my good friend Carol. +RACHEL: Hm-mmm. +RACHEL: Did, did he just, did he, did he just say, he said bye. +RACHEL: Horrible and degrading list of reasons not to be with me? +RACHEL: Oh, I guess it'd be different if I were, with somebody. +RACHEL: I just dumped one cry baby, I’ll dump you too! +RACHEL: OK, you're whiney, you are, you're obsessive, you are insecure, you're, you're gutless, you know, you don't ever, you don't just sort of seize the day, you know. +RACHEL: Okay Joey, we’re luffing a little bit, so could you tighten up the cunningham? +RACHEL: Oh no-no-no. +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: Oh no, yes I do! +RACHEL: Head Ross! +RACHEL: Mm-mmm. +RACHEL: You never see Joanna again! +RACHEL: Oh, stop that, stop that right now. +RACHEL: Y'know you just said it 'cause you saw me there, if you'd have seen a circus freak, you would've said, I take thee circus freak. +RACHEL: No, it's okay, you didn't know. +RACHEL: Oh my God Ross, no, hang up the phone, give me the phone Ross, give me the phone, give me the phone, give me the. +RACHEL: I can't believe this! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Do what, do what? +RACHEL: Okay, you go do it! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Do you know how much money I could’ve made listening to you? +RACHEL: What if, um, if he calls his own cell phone to find out who found it and I answer and we start talking and we fall in love. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Here are the ornaments your mom sent. +RACHEL: Y’know I just wish we could be like on a break! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Isn't this amazing? +RACHEL: Ohh-ha-ha! +RACHEL: That was amazing! +RACHEL: I don’t think you’re going to need it though. +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: Music. +RACHEL: I just want to point out I never did anything to hurt you in high school. +RACHEL: So, what's up? +RACHEL: Yeah that’s great. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Umm, well let’s see Monica and Chandler are occupied. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Yeah, I didn’t want you to get hit by the boom! +RACHEL: So does it really hurt as bad as they say? +RACHEL: Oh God I'm sorry! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: It'll never last, he's just a rebound roommate. +RACHEL: Ross, didn't you say that there was an elevator in here? +RACHEL: What is going on with you? +RACHEL: Pheebs, I can't believe he hasn't kissed you yet. +RACHEL: Oh hey-hey wait! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Beth dies. +RACHEL: Oh uh-huh, uh-huh, coffee, a little rub-rub-rub under the table. +RACHEL: Oh, that sounds good! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: No, no, no, you said, got the keys. +RACHEL: Hey Pheebs, I'mI'm taking Charlie shopping, why don't you come and I'll help you find something. +RACHEL: You don't tell the guy that! +RACHEL: But, y’know I remember him saying that-that he had plans tonight. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: This is a safe street, this is a safe building, there's nothing OH MY GOOOD, oh my God, oh I gotta go, I gotta go, I gotta go. +RACHEL: Oh my God, you drew on me?! +RACHEL: Hey, do you believe this? +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Ross, we actually watched the documentary together. +RACHEL: I did not see that coming. +RACHEL: Umm… Ohh Tag, umm…you’re such a great guy and we have sooo much fun together but I don’tI don’t… Well said. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, ok. Let me just grab my night vision goggles and my stun gun. +RACHEL: Janice, hi! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: God I know, you're right. +RACHEL: Yeah, I uhh, I have a, I have a date. +RACHEL: Ben just said his first word. +RACHEL: Ross, thank you. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: You’re right. +RACHEL: Ugh. +RACHEL: Can I talk to you alone for a minute? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I said I’ll do it! +RACHEL: Guess what? +RACHEL: You’re going to have a baby, and you need to be prepared. +RACHEL: I am! +RACHEL: It's like firing Elmo. +RACHEL: Late. +RACHEL: Listen, I'll got to Ross's and get the blender, you get all the margarita stuff ready. +RACHEL: You said you wanted to talk about it, let’s talk about it! +RACHEL: Oh, you guys made up. +RACHEL: But Pheebs, y’know you earned it. +RACHEL: Oh my God, look-look he’s taking off her clothes! +RACHEL: I know but they’re just so beautiful! +RACHEL: So now, are do you, do you still do music? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Forget it! +RACHEL: How have you never been on Oprah? +RACHEL: Come on, I don't know what else to do. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: My boss wants to buy my baby! +RACHEL: We do? +RACHEL: Look! +RACHEL: Okay, just the idea of you and he and all these women, it’s just. +RACHEL: Hell, I was in Greece! +RACHEL: Look at you with your little maple syrup award! +RACHEL: You know Marcel? +RACHEL: Sorry! +RACHEL: Oh Joey, I’m so happy things worked out for us that we’re having this baby together. +RACHEL: Okay, maybe they are not funny to you… Or Carol! +RACHEL: Oh Ross, honey you gotta stop torturing yourself! +RACHEL: Today. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Honey, I feel terrible too. +RACHEL: That’s it! +RACHEL: I kissed Gavin last night. +RACHEL: Are you playing with Monica's shoes? +RACHEL: Well thank you so much for coming. +RACHEL: Look at the window, there's my name! +RACHEL: So that there will be a decent place for me to sit. +RACHEL: Okay, what's up? +RACHEL: So uh, apparently people are familiar with the Europe story? +RACHEL: Chandler, we ate an entire cheesecake two days ago and you want more? +RACHEL: That bag is gonna get you that part. +RACHEL: Yeah, Rachel. +RACHEL: You’re out of toilet paper! +RACHEL: Monica? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Honey, he's about to go hit on Isabella Rosselini. +RACHEL: No, it’s all right. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: All right honey, we'd better go if we wanna catch that movie. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Well honey, I’m late for a meeting. +RACHEL: Oh come on Ross, we’ve done it before we’ll do it again, it’ll be a nice way to bookend the pregnancy. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Okay, I'm late for work. +RACHEL: Both of you? +RACHEL: The most adorable guy came over today, and I got to dress him up all day! +RACHEL: Oh, Pheebs, Pheebs. +RACHEL: Look, we have all been there! +RACHEL: Hi, I'm here to see mr Campbell, with Gucci. +RACHEL: Just-just think of me as a ketchup bottle, y’know you sometimes you have to bang on the end of it just to get something to come out. +RACHEL: I wouldn’t do that! +RACHEL: Downstairs! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Ross, why do you hate our child? +RACHEL: Well, it's my cat. +RACHEL: I don't care! +RACHEL: But y'know, I could use a hand getting ready. +RACHEL: Not me! +RACHEL: Yes, you did! +RACHEL: Y’know you—I couldn’t concentrate and I blushed every time he looked at me. +RACHEL: That’s a steak house! +RACHEL: Well I was gonna tell him that I’mI’m gonna have the baby and he can be as involved as he wants. +RACHEL: Ok, I. AAAHHHH! +RACHEL: I KNOW! +RACHEL: Why would a charity give away a free boat?! +RACHEL: Break! +RACHEL: Well, uh, we're gonna hit the beach? +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: I did the first time! +RACHEL: I can’t! +RACHEL: I just wanted you to learn. +RACHEL: Have to make it stop! +RACHEL: I’m watching Cujo. +RACHEL: Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! +RACHEL: I have your key. +RACHEL: Did you guys hear them last night? +RACHEL: I can’t, I can’t believe this. +RACHEL: Good. +RACHEL: Patrick just uh, ended things with me. +RACHEL: Why don't you put it right here next to my water? +RACHEL: I just wanna know what, what is behind this-this strong, silent exterior. +RACHEL: Oh great! +RACHEL: God, please take those off! +RACHEL: Honey, this will help. +RACHEL: How are you?! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh, I'm so sorry. +RACHEL: Sophie knows, Monica and Phoebe know. +RACHEL: Oh, hi! +RACHEL: Ross. +RACHEL: And Joey knows now? +RACHEL: This is such a great party! +RACHEL: Monica, do you remember mean old Mrs. Kreeger in the fifth grade? +RACHEL: Yeah, umm, I was wondering if you umm, if you umm, left your wallet at the store today? +RACHEL: If it wasn't for you and your stupid balloon, I would be on a plane watching a woman do this right now. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Don't wait up. +RACHEL: What's up?! +RACHEL: You know, this happens all the time to my computer at work. +RACHEL: Well, I did my best to convince him that I’m not some crazy girl who is dying to get married. +RACHEL: Come on, that’s always a painful time! +RACHEL: I mean that’s two doors away, it would take them a long time to peck their way back over here. +RACHEL: Nothing. +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: I know that she has a meeting with her lawyer and then she has to make a very big poop. +RACHEL: You have got to get over this Joey thing, okay? +RACHEL: I mean n-not-not fake at all like most famous people. +RACHEL: Thought I'd give it a shot. +RACHEL: Mommy's bobbies. +RACHEL: I’m gonna do it too! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Oh that's what you want. +RACHEL: I should be happy for them. +RACHEL: Oh, I’ve got big Valentine’s plans! +RACHEL: How are you doing? +RACHEL: Oh, it's just like a bloodbath in here today. +RACHEL: You guys, the car-service just got here. +RACHEL: Just tell Joey that you watched the tape and you liked it, but your bosses didn't. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I can’t! +RACHEL: Oh, that’s what this is all about? +RACHEL: Oh really? +RACHEL: Go see a musical. +RACHEL: You really think I didn't say goodbye to you because I don't care? +RACHEL: I’m serious. +RACHEL: No, I also had to go to a couple houses with him as his girlfriend. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Okay, don't believe me, I know I'm right-do you guys want to go downstairs and get a drink? +RACHEL: I can't even begin to explain to you how much I'm gonna miss you. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I’ve been thinking about it. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Yeah, I said what was okay when I thought she was some weird bald chick. +RACHEL: I'm going to a soap opera roof party! +RACHEL: She's mine! +RACHEL: Let’s go to lunch. +RACHEL: We are looking for our Christmas presents from Monica. +RACHEL: I can't. +RACHEL: Maybe she’ll be gone for months. +RACHEL: Goodnight. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: No-no-no! +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: Ross. +RACHEL: Would you let me talk. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, really? +RACHEL: On TV?! +RACHEL: Well, I never thought I'd say this, but I'm gonna go use Ugly Naked Guy's bathroom. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Ok, Ok, Pheebs. +RACHEL: I'm off my break now so uh, um here you take this and um, I am gonna go pour these very nice people some coffee. +RACHEL: Oh, honey, don’t worry. +RACHEL: He's not stoned. +RACHEL: Yeah, it couldn’t hurt to look. +RACHEL: Irrational, huh? +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: I didn't mean to bring you down. +RACHEL: No, she was just much better at job than me! +RACHEL: And the craziest thing is, now my boss likes me because I told her about it and she said it was the best gossip she’d heard all year. +RACHEL: You're-you're married and it's just ridiculous, and it's like, it's like when I said it, I sort of like, I floated up out of my body, y'know? +RACHEL: Contraction. +RACHEL: But it's like something. +RACHEL: Princess Caroline?! +RACHEL: I’m talking to my boss right now! +RACHEL: Okay, calm down, here they are. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Uh, its Emma. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Who? +RACHEL: You know what, it's already three o'clock and they haven't even gotten to Emma's group yet. +RACHEL: Oh, he's just goofing around. +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: Yeah well it looks great! +RACHEL: Okay, here we go. +RACHEL: Hey, cute jacket! +RACHEL: Ross is going to pick up the phone. +RACHEL: I think it is. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Like my uh, like my nose or my tongue or something. +RACHEL: Oh, that's nice. +RACHEL: It’s not a big deal! +RACHEL: No? +RACHEL: Since I have been waiting four women, that’s four, one higher than the number of centimeters that I am dilated, have come and gone with their babies! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: So what’s-what’s going on with you? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I’m gonna be too nervous! +RACHEL: You got fired?! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: And he wasn't, Why? +RACHEL: How was she? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Aww, Joey, come here. +RACHEL: There is a trash can right there. +RACHEL: Um. +RACHEL: Hey Joey, can I ask you something? +RACHEL: We'll ask Phoebe. +RACHEL: And I want everything back to the way it was. +RACHEL: Uh, let’s rip! +RACHEL: Oh no. +RACHEL: Well since I’m movin’ out and-and you’re so beautiful. +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: And you’ve just gotten her one great present? +RACHEL: Okay, but Pheebs, Pheebs, Jack gave up a cow, I gave up an orthodontist. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Wait, what? +RACHEL: Oh you really, you really just don’t want to hear about it. +RACHEL: Imagine the worst things you think about yourself. +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: This is so amazing! +RACHEL: They are not breaking up, look at them. +RACHEL: Yeah, I have to tell Ross that I love him. +RACHEL: It’s negative? +RACHEL: Well! +RACHEL: Are you? +RACHEL: Ooh, my! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Give me some advice on how I’m gonna tell Ross! +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: I've got one leg shorter than the other. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Oh, I can not believe you didn't tell me! +RACHEL: So what are you gonna do? +RACHEL: I don't think that Joey and Charlie have anything in common. +RACHEL: Hi sweetie! +RACHEL: You win, you win. +RACHEL: Ahh. +RACHEL: You're decision. +RACHEL: And now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go to the rest room. +RACHEL: Yeah, there was. +RACHEL: I mean, just last week we were having breakfast and he had a couple of grapes on his plate and. +RACHEL: And for the one week that we went out, he didn't sleep with anybody else! +RACHEL: I got a date. +RACHEL: God, isn't this exciting? +RACHEL: Isn't this against the rules? +RACHEL: Uh-oh. +RACHEL: Look, either help me or go. +RACHEL: I always loved that! +RACHEL: You know, its funny, basketball, because I happen to have tickets too, Umm, who likes the Knicks. +RACHEL: And I’m Rachel, an admirer of the building. +RACHEL: Do you really want an award you didn’t win? +RACHEL: I'm gonna go set up a little litter box for Mrs. Whiskerson. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Yay! +RACHEL: Oh, she's so nice and big! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: So we're okay, we're okay, we're okay, aren't we? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: I just want you to know. +RACHEL: Let me see that. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: College guys are so cute! +RACHEL: Y'know Ross why don’t you put that on your answering machine! +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: I'm going to Paris. +RACHEL: Would you stop doing that?! +RACHEL: I mean, it’s pretty easy not to kiss someone, you just don’t kiss them! +RACHEL: Oh Joey, I can’t believe you brought my boss into this! +RACHEL: So I guess I’ll just stumble across the hall and sleep with the first guy I find in there! +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: December 26th, huh maybe she’s Santa Clause. +RACHEL: And yet she was worth jeopardising our relationship! +RACHEL: Oh, Emma loves him! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: You’re a man right Ross?! +RACHEL: Get out! +RACHEL: These things keep falling down, I can't. +RACHEL: Phoebe, don’t you think you’ve had enough to drink? +RACHEL: And truthfully honey, you don't seem very connected to the baby. +RACHEL: Honey, y'know I just gotta tell you, I think this is such a terrific thing you're having these babies for Frank and Alice. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: That sounds great. +RACHEL: Oh well then, so I'm just going to go back to talking to my friend here. +RACHEL: You wanna go to Newark? +RACHEL: Yeah, I’m not so sure you should be here when he comes up. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: I just got us dates with two unbelievably cute nurses. +RACHEL: Come on Rosita, us chichas got to stick together! +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Sup. +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: What are you playing with? +RACHEL: Can we just get out of here, before somebody else gets hurt? +RACHEL: Hi, I thought you might like some ice chips. +RACHEL: That was a nice hotel! +RACHEL: Y'know what? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: So, which of this kitchen stuff is mine? +RACHEL: Come on. +RACHEL: Don’t do this to yourself. +RACHEL: Oh, thank God you’re here! +RACHEL: I don’t know. +RACHEL: Sure, but come on, as big as your wedding? +RACHEL: Huh, that’s funny. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Nothing, I mean, um, it is your first time with her and, you know if the first time doesn't go well, well then that's, that's pretty darn hard to recover from. +RACHEL: Well, yeah, maybe. +RACHEL: Because I’ve kinda got an el fresco situation going on over here. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Vanilla?! +RACHEL: Come here! +RACHEL: Very good. +RACHEL: Wait that’s Ursula! +RACHEL: I love her books! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh god what am I gonna do you guys, I can’t even comfort my own baby! +RACHEL: Oh Gunther! +RACHEL: Yeah honey, I'm standing right there! +RACHEL: Excuse me? +RACHEL: I mean, this is just hopeless. +RACHEL: Anything we want. +RACHEL: Well, apparently she caught him cheating on her with someone else. +RACHEL: Homo. +RACHEL: Guess what Gunther found? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I can do something. +RACHEL: RossRoss, you have no idea what this means to me! +RACHEL: You, you, you said he liked me. +RACHEL: I overheard you guys on the phone the other day, and you said, I'll just tell Rachel that I'm doing laundry for a couple of hours. +RACHEL: I’m gal pal Rachel Green, and if you want the dirt, I’m the one you come too. +RACHEL: Hello. +RACHEL: I can't-I still can't believe it. +RACHEL: Wh-what do you mean? +RACHEL: And I’m glad that you’re done. +RACHEL: I'mI'm sorry, I just thought that. +RACHEL: Why would he want his blue blazer black? +RACHEL: When the Louis Vuitton people found out that Ralph Lauren wanted me back, the offered me more money! +RACHEL: But these are the three that Monica pre-approved. +RACHEL: She’s gonna help us take care of the baby! +RACHEL: Seriously? +RACHEL: No seriously! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: And then when the day comes when Kim wants to promote one of us, who do you think she's gonna pick? +RACHEL: Oh yeah, now everybody wants to be under this hat! +RACHEL: My God! +RACHEL: No Mon, you want to put them in concentric circles. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I don't know, who would I have to sleep with? +RACHEL: There's more alcohol, right? +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: I believe it. +RACHEL: So! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: What is this? +RACHEL: What'd you buy? +RACHEL: Ross and I are not getting married. +RACHEL: Become a lesbian or something. +RACHEL: Well that is because your eye immediately goes to the big naked man. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: It had a buttery, crumbly, graham cracker crust, with a very rich yet light, cream cheese filling. +RACHEL: You promised you would break up with her! +RACHEL: Okay, okay, okay, I got one! +RACHEL: Anybody else? +RACHEL: I hate this apartment! +RACHEL: Can you believe that something that stupid actually got us our apartment back? +RACHEL: Rock-paper-scissors? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Don’t worry I promise that you will only have to be pregnant for a few more hours, ‘cause I’m going to tell the father today. +RACHEL: I knew it! +RACHEL: All right, stand up. +RACHEL: I'm just calling to say that uhm, everything's fine and I'm really happy for you and your cat who, by the way, I think you should name Michael. +RACHEL: Wait, now wait a second, this isn’t too revealing is it? +RACHEL: You're the toughest palaeontologist I know. +RACHEL: He's soo lucky, if Janice were a guy, she'd be sleeping with somebody else by now. +RACHEL: Y’know, it’ll be like college, I’ll hang a hanger on the door and put a sign, Come back later, I’m gettin’ lucky. +RACHEL: 'Cause I've got a product report to read, it's like eight pages, I hope I don't fall asleep. +RACHEL: So it was like one and fifty dollars. +RACHEL: Listen, we-we have to have a party tonight! +RACHEL: Would you stop?! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: That’s your dad’s bedroom! +RACHEL: I don't think so. +RACHEL: Yeah baby, I'll show you how we do it! +RACHEL: Oh I don't know honey. +RACHEL: Daaargh! +RACHEL: Well now see this isn’t telling us anything. +RACHEL: Okay, fine! +RACHEL: We can talk about anything! +RACHEL: This was all your idea. +RACHEL: Okay, hold on real quick, hold on a second let me just uh, get a little more comfortable here. +RACHEL: We are never gonna happen, OK. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Ok, we can do this now, can't we Ben? +RACHEL: Well of those things that you said in the interview, I mean if you believe any of them, I must not be a very good assistant. +RACHEL: And, taped back together. +RACHEL: Something to do with numbers? +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Ah yes, but he’s very protective of me so you’d better watch yourself. +RACHEL: Oh god. +RACHEL: Late thirties? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: All right, look, just please, take a moment here and think about what you’re asking of me. +RACHEL: And I mean, you know, you guys. +RACHEL: Yeah, down from seven hundred, you are saving like two hundred bucks! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: And, I don’t care how hard it is for you, do not tell her that you will call her again! +RACHEL: Emma and I came in a little early to do research on the presentation. +RACHEL: What-what about Monica? +RACHEL: Are you serious? +RACHEL: Well III'm not moving. +RACHEL: Hello! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Yeah, 15 hundred dollars. +RACHEL: Y’know umm, what we mean to each other. +RACHEL: Wait no, honey, honey throw it to me, throw it to me. +RACHEL: Well, I have to be, I don't really have a choice, I mean, you know, I could look at the bright side, I get two birthday parties and two birthday cakes. +RACHEL: I can't stand that guy! +RACHEL: Why doesn’t she want to come out? +RACHEL: I just developed early. +RACHEL: I mean, you know you cannot keep one of these babies! +RACHEL: Can I be your girlfriend again? +RACHEL: It’s not a big deal! +RACHEL: You listen to me! +RACHEL: This is all I have. +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: Y’know, I mean we’re gonna see each other all the time. +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Well, I was gonna let you play with it. +RACHEL: That works for me. +RACHEL: Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Ugh… What do you, what do you mean? +RACHEL: I work with this guy, you know, I have the baby, and I have Ross, and I just. +RACHEL: How?! +RACHEL: So this has happened to you? +RACHEL: Yeah, if you’re going to do the ears, you might as well take a pass at the nosal area. +RACHEL: I mean, y'know, Okay. +RACHEL: He’ll find me. +RACHEL: Hi Daddy! +RACHEL: Because I’m married. +RACHEL: All right I know, I know how it looks Pheebs, but I’m telling you. +RACHEL: Oh really?! +RACHEL: You’re right. +RACHEL: I'm happy for them. +RACHEL: Alright, alright, so I'm not a great typist. +RACHEL: You get back to nature! +RACHEL: Hi, Mindy. +RACHEL: Y’know what I wish? +RACHEL: Oh God… Oh, he’s in there right now? +RACHEL: Huh, I ve just never, had a relationship with that kind of passion, you know, where, where you have to have somebody right there in the middle of a theme park. +RACHEL: Wo-women? +RACHEL: Because it took us months to find a good nanny and I wouldn't want anything to, you know, drive her away. +RACHEL: This not cool! +RACHEL: That's not Ross! +RACHEL: You too. +RACHEL: The duck?! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Yes, totally. +RACHEL: Did we speak on the phone last night? +RACHEL: Emma will be up in a minute! +RACHEL: No Ross! +RACHEL: He left my number at work, but he was helping his niece with her report on the pioneers. +RACHEL: Yeah hon, it can’t hurt to put your name down! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Am I overreacting to this? +RACHEL: Good! +RACHEL: I mean it's so unexpected! +RACHEL: Whoa-ho. +RACHEL: Have I been living with him for too long, or did that all just make sense? +RACHEL: Oh that’s great! +RACHEL: No way. +RACHEL: No-no, they're not very nice people. +RACHEL: I finished it! +RACHEL: What are they? +RACHEL: And that person is going to be our backup! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Rub it. +RACHEL: Oooh. +RACHEL: Hello! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Well, first of all, Paulo and I are not back together. +RACHEL: Oh my God, Phoebe, this is impossible! +RACHEL: Ohh, I love Joey! +RACHEL: Oh Ross. +RACHEL: Pheebs, Monica tripped me, I don't think I can ever run again, ever! +RACHEL: Oh y’know what honey? +RACHEL: Taking advantage? +RACHEL: Ah. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Well, at least you make each other laugh. +RACHEL: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: I'm giving you the advantage, enjoy! +RACHEL: You would be lucky to be with him! +RACHEL: Okay, thank you for that. +RACHEL: Are you kidding? +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh I’m sorry mummy’s so sorry go back to sleep go back to sleep. +RACHEL: This is Ross, he is the father. +RACHEL: What do you mean, you're taking over my job? +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: I’m sorry honey, I’m just having a, having a rough day. +RACHEL: We’re having a girl! +RACHEL: Wow, that’s great Ross, I’m sorry we weren’t more supportive before. +RACHEL: Well no, I don’t smell anything. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, we were but umm, now we’ve got candy. +RACHEL: And do you know when I figured that out? +RACHEL: Yeah I know! +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh, okay! +RACHEL: Well, remember how we were too drunk to remember anything the night we were married? +RACHEL: We won! +RACHEL: Hey Joey, will you please set this up for people to put Emma's presents on? +RACHEL: Be home, be home, be home. +RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, moving on, moving on, next question. +RACHEL: Why did you give me such a hard time? +RACHEL: Anything at all. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: You stole the phone! +RACHEL: Is that Christian Sanders? +RACHEL: Uhh, the mailman, the super. +RACHEL: And II think you're a really good guy and I'm sorry that I misjudged you. +RACHEL: Chandler has a jewelery box? +RACHEL: This is all making so much sense to me now! +RACHEL: It's really. +RACHEL: Well, no it’s not in there! +RACHEL: What party? +RACHEL: They're male nurses. +RACHEL: I’m getting married in December. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Ok, let’s work from the top down! +RACHEL: Dumb old perfect for the job Hilda! +RACHEL: Well, this sounds like fun! +RACHEL: What's going on? +RACHEL: Phoebe, honey, if you hate it so much, you should walk out there right now and quit! +RACHEL: Let's just go over there and see if she heard. +RACHEL: Although I did sit down where there wasn’t a chair. +RACHEL: He is, isn't he? +RACHEL: Ugh, I just gotta get the thing back! +RACHEL: No oh!, I feel so stupid! +RACHEL: I'm so happy for you! +RACHEL: Y’know, this used to be my bedroom. +RACHEL: I can't miss that. +RACHEL: Oh wow. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Listen, y’know what? +RACHEL: I'm sorry, sweetie. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: All right, look, look. +RACHEL: Okay, very cute braces. +RACHEL: You think so? +RACHEL: Just once and a while, have it on in the background. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Why don't you just marry her? +RACHEL: Wow, he must like you the best. +RACHEL: Yep. +RACHEL: Cecilia Monroe man, what a great actress. +RACHEL: Well, I, kinda, kind of lost him. +RACHEL: Yeah it is. +RACHEL: All I wanted to do was help you try to figure out what to do with your life and this is how you repay me? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh, it was so much fun. +RACHEL: Oh what, you-you want both of them? +RACHEL: We win! +RACHEL: The logic is, that there are two of us and we are both strong enough to break a chair in half! +RACHEL: Yeah, so let’s get started on the wedding plans! +RACHEL: Hi, welcome to our tropical Christmas party. +RACHEL: I just had a conversation with her, and she said that she and Joey made a deal! +RACHEL: Let me tell you something. +RACHEL: You are right there with Emily. +RACHEL: Oh, I am so proud of you! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: No, she left a message. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Which one of us should go to dinner? +RACHEL: Okay, but Ross just listen to me. +RACHEL: It’s a standard issue bra clasp! +RACHEL: Janice?! +RACHEL: Contraceptives are not always effective! +RACHEL: What the. +RACHEL: Jack from downstairs? +RACHEL: Bye, Pheebs. +RACHEL: Yes, yes, it does. +RACHEL: Yeah, well just be glad he's not playing a smaller instrument. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: And she's comforted by him because she loves her uncle Joey so much. +RACHEL: So II started packing, then I realized, What am I doing? +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: Thank God you’re home! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: God! +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Alright, that is it. +RACHEL: It’s not fair Ross we got here first! +RACHEL: Okay, you are crazy! +RACHEL: Oh wait, don’t you have to pay for your, Busty Ladies? +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Oh, really, really? +RACHEL: What‘cha doing Mon? +RACHEL: Ross, do you think it's easy for me to see you with somebody else? +RACHEL: Gee, I always heard them talk about that, I just always thought that it was a club they went to. +RACHEL: Hi, you come in here all time. +RACHEL: Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. +RACHEL: Well, wait a minute, you're the boss! +RACHEL: Is that perverted old couple two doors over. +RACHEL: Oh, nothing, he’s just goofy like that, I actually, hardly notice it anymore. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: You can keep those pants by the way. +RACHEL: You know, 'cause I gotta tell you Ross, it not like you just came in from branding cattle. +RACHEL: Well forget it, I’m not telling that girl anything. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Ohh that'd be great! +RACHEL: I don’t want you thinking of me like that any more! +RACHEL: She did! +RACHEL: I hope it's ok. Ok, coming! +RACHEL: Ok, I just, I just really need to be with myself right now. +RACHEL: Oh gosh, she's going to kill me. +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: If you don't I will! +RACHEL: Phoebe, can I see you for a second? +RACHEL: I mean, didn't you think you were just gonna meet somone, fall in love and that'd be it?. +RACHEL: We could name her Francette. +RACHEL: Ross, actually there's something that I really need to talk to you about. +RACHEL: I told you I would find it! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: How many centimeters am I dilated? +RACHEL: Come on, give me one of those! +RACHEL: And did you?! +RACHEL: Yes, my wind. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: You think that’s all it is? +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Hi Joey! +RACHEL: Please? +RACHEL: A couple of bucks. +RACHEL: Why do men keep talking to me like this? +RACHEL: Did you not get a good enough look the other day? +RACHEL: Wait so Joey if you get this, you’re gonna be like the star of your own TV show! +RACHEL: Excuse me! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: All this stuff I had been doing, Ehh, pardon me? +RACHEL: P. S. Chandler, I knew they’d break you. +RACHEL: I mean. +RACHEL: No, you can’t. +RACHEL: You love her. +RACHEL: Wait, wait, wait, wait. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Ooo, what? +RACHEL: There were times when it wasn't even me. +RACHEL: Ooh, is this one of those things where you throw it in a bag with. +RACHEL: And you know Monica and Ross! +RACHEL: That would be great! +RACHEL: Wow, that's great. +RACHEL: I’m so glad, I’m so glad you shared. +RACHEL: Good night! +RACHEL: I know, I know! +RACHEL: Why don't we play rock-paper-scissors, and whoever loses goes in first. +RACHEL: I just saw Danny getting on the subway with a girl and he had his arm around her. +RACHEL: Who is this? +RACHEL: Ooo-ooh! +RACHEL: This-this, no, oh no, no-no-no, this is not, that’s-that’s not what it is. +RACHEL: Monica, what are you talking about? +RACHEL: It was bananas, cream, and beef! +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: You’re not blinking. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: All right, you're the boss. +RACHEL: Uh which one of us are you talking to there, Barr? +RACHEL: Awwww. +RACHEL: So what do you say? +RACHEL: You know what, I'm gonna do that, I'm gonna call him up, and I'm gonna ask him out. +RACHEL: I mean, what skills do you have? +RACHEL: Well umm, maybe we could uhh. +RACHEL: Oh, Joey, I have such a problem! +RACHEL: I'm gonna go on the date. +RACHEL: Definitely, well it definitely took me by surprise, but I’m okay. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Yeah, but umm. +RACHEL: No, it's not gonna be okay Ross, tomorrow is my last day, and I don't have a lead. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh, you guys are so great. +RACHEL: Listen, I am not uptight, man. +RACHEL: Besides y’know what? +RACHEL: Alright, look, OK. +RACHEL: It’s not random, it’s Bob. +RACHEL: But I haven't used my card in weeks! +RACHEL: I really do. +RACHEL: She touches him near his heart. +RACHEL: Well, yeah, right, y’know what? +RACHEL: It’s impossible! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: You know what our childrens names are gonna be. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh-oh-hey! +RACHEL: Wha, wha, wh, what am I gonna do? +RACHEL: Well, it was all Ross’s idea. +RACHEL: What, what is so strange about me having a date? +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Bye, see ya. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Alright, let's give to these babies something to cry about! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Chandler, that’s not enough. +RACHEL: Okay, fine. +RACHEL: I know that. +RACHEL: Damnit! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Phoebe, it’s okay. +RACHEL: Good for you Pheebs! +RACHEL: So okay! +RACHEL: I go see my doctor tomorrow, I’ll ask her about this. +RACHEL: Wait okay, tell-tell me that you like him, please? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Wha. +RACHEL: You like me? +RACHEL: When I tell you what I’m about to tell you, I need you to remember that we are all here for you and that we love you. +RACHEL: No I wasn’t! +RACHEL: And ah, you could start with a money salad! +RACHEL: That’s too heavy. +RACHEL: Wait, you can't go away this weekend! +RACHEL: Well, what-what ‘cha got there? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: But I'll leave now, or I'm gonna miss my plane. +RACHEL: Uh, well, let's see here this says this license belongs to a uh, uh, belongs to a mister uh, Pheebs, and umm, yeah, so sorry to bother you at home. +RACHEL: Hey, y’know what I was thinking? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: OK, OK. Hi. +RACHEL: Yeah, ohh! +RACHEL: Sawyer? +RACHEL: Look at all these cups! +RACHEL: There’s nothing to handle. +RACHEL: Cause Kim will just freak out and she already doesn’t like me very much. +RACHEL: Ooh, so cute, that I'm thinking about jamming this pen in my eye. +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: And so bad. +RACHEL: I’ll see you later. +RACHEL: I was just trying to make things. +RACHEL: Oh, and no one from like legal. +RACHEL: You’d be okay if you knew that Mark had kissed me, and been naked with me, and made love to me? +RACHEL: I haven’t told him yet and I don’t think I can tell him at all now! +RACHEL: Both Monica and her try to move out of Phoebe's. +RACHEL: My sister Jill would be throwing up over the side and my dad would be upset because nobody was helping and then when we did help he would scream at us for doing it wrong. +RACHEL: No, it's just, look, you know, when I first moved to the city I was a lot like her! +RACHEL: I get it! +RACHEL: Ya gotta take a bite with all the layers! +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: I thought that if I could get you here, I could seduce you. +RACHEL: So, whaddya think George is like? +RACHEL: Can't I just look at the handles on them? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: So who’s idea was it to put everybody in the diner on skates? +RACHEL: She would. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: We are looking at a Playboy. +RACHEL: Ohh, you already agreed to this, haven't you? +RACHEL: Here we go! +RACHEL: Look at him, he’s so cute. +RACHEL: I have a sonogram picture! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: I'd say from the looks of it our naked buddy is moving. +RACHEL: Hello! +RACHEL: And then how you gonna feel? +RACHEL: Well, II don’t like it. +RACHEL: OH, a soap opera roof party! +RACHEL: I’m going! +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: Ohh, I mean it’s just so realistic! +RACHEL: We need more candy? +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: Look at that woman sitting by the pool getting tan, so leathery and wrinkled, I'm so jealous! +RACHEL: Ok. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: I will wake you up in a way that's proved very popular in the past. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Come on Joey! +RACHEL: Ah. +RACHEL: I love you too. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: God, I am so glad you don't have a problem with this, because if you did, I wouldn't even consider applying. +RACHEL: Monica, come on! +RACHEL: Oh, well you know who I love the most? +RACHEL: Left. +RACHEL: But what is wrong with this dog?! +RACHEL: But I hired you! +RACHEL: Phoebe and I are going to have so much fun. +RACHEL: Well, you know what? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Ohh-ohh-oh, thank you. +RACHEL: Feel me up? +RACHEL: DIAL IT DOWN! +RACHEL: Happy birthday. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Yes, you did! +RACHEL: I’m only staying here until my apartment gets fixed. +RACHEL: Since when? +RACHEL: I don’t know, let me think. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh, my God, I just pulled one out. +RACHEL: A break from us. +RACHEL: Remember? +RACHEL: Yeah, I’m pretty confident about that. +RACHEL: You need to learn some new slang. +RACHEL: I mean, maybe that's something to do with the fact that I saw him do a love scene yesterday. +RACHEL: So I guess now it's your turn again. +RACHEL: There's an opening for an assistant buyer in Junior Miss. +RACHEL: Believe you me! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: And II am just trying to figure out why. +RACHEL: I mean, you-you were gonna get married in Vegas and then you backed out! +RACHEL: Listen honey, can you keep dad occupied, I'm gonna go talk to mom for a while. +RACHEL: Totally cool. +RACHEL: Oh My God, Phoebe, that’s not Ralph Lauren. +RACHEL: You take that back. +RACHEL: Uhh, I'm still in love with you Ross. +RACHEL: Phoebe? +RACHEL: I'mI'm gonna meet you upstairs in a minute. +RACHEL: My clothes. +RACHEL: Monica, I’m quitting! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: So, what did you guys do? +RACHEL: It's Robert Bobby. +RACHEL: We cannot do it! +RACHEL: Bye daddy. +RACHEL: Y’know, I don’tI don’t know. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: No? +RACHEL: Because of our history. +RACHEL: Uh-huh! +RACHEL: Well, you’re lucky you never met that bitch Sharon Majesky. +RACHEL: You guys, come on! +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Honey, I don't know how to tell you this, but um, if something were to happen to Ross or to myself um you wouldn't get the baby. +RACHEL: Don’t dance for me! +RACHEL: My dad’s proud of me. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: What-what is your wife’s name? +RACHEL: I can't believe you would want to after what he did to me! +RACHEL: I'm gonna do it. +RACHEL: How are you gonna feel if we actually do win? +RACHEL: All right, I like that. +RACHEL: Come and knock on my door. +RACHEL: It was figured out, and now everything's just kinda like. +RACHEL: Phoebe, this was my fault and besides y’know what? +RACHEL: Yeah, and you know what? +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Although, we made a joke that we spend so much time together he should call me his work wife. +RACHEL: Uh, Joey. +RACHEL: Ooh, I miss dating. +RACHEL: We're glad she's dying. +RACHEL: Oh, right, clink. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I wish you were six years older. +RACHEL: Well, what's the other thing, what do I think? +RACHEL: All right, you know what? +RACHEL: Just take him to like a ball game or something. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I’ve got my Chinese food on the way, and the rest of your saltwater taffy! +RACHEL: You don't knock, you have no. +RACHEL: No, I don’t want to tell you. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Well, legend has it Joey, that, she comes alive when you're asleep. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: I mean it would disrupt your entire life. +RACHEL: I’m gonna marry someone good y’know. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: It really does? +RACHEL: He was cute, and he liked me. +RACHEL: Are you joking? +RACHEL: OK, you know what, are, are you being like, the blind date guy again? +RACHEL: See look at us, right now, not kissing! +RACHEL: Damnit! +RACHEL: When I get back, I want every little detail. +RACHEL: We would like to talk to you for a second. +RACHEL: Wait-wait! +RACHEL: No, see this isn't about the movie theatre, this is about you stealing my wind. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: What do you mean last night? +RACHEL: It's, uh, just, y'know, something to, um, do on the 'plane. +RACHEL: I bet you’re a Gemini. +RACHEL: You think you’re gonna get out of this on a technicality? +RACHEL: This isn’t a game, Joey you can really get hurt out here. +RACHEL: So, he said it was just a sprain, and that was it. +RACHEL: He offered me one. +RACHEL: Well, I told him I would think about it, but I’m gonna tell him no. +RACHEL: Seriously, how can you watch this? +RACHEL: Oh, well drop and give me ten more! +RACHEL: Ohh, gee. +RACHEL: You get your messages! +RACHEL: How good? +RACHEL: That’s weird. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Sure, I’ll just sit next to the trans-sexual from purchasing. +RACHEL: I love them both, so why don’t you just pick one and that’ll be it. +RACHEL: I don’t even know what you’re talking about because I didn’t ask you to do anything! +RACHEL: God, you're brilliant! +RACHEL: I'm interviewing for another job. +RACHEL: Joey, is this that thing that you do when you say you're bad so I'll give you a compliment? +RACHEL: Oh, no, meh-nah-nah-nah, come on you're gonna ruin it! +RACHEL: I was sending you signals? +RACHEL: Ross you were snoring. +RACHEL: Oh, I don’t know. +RACHEL: The nights are the hardest. +RACHEL: Ohh, thank you. +RACHEL: Oh, they're firemen guys. +RACHEL: I can’t, I can’t look at it. +RACHEL: Get out! +RACHEL: I mean y’know, I don’t know about you buy I haven’t thought about our thing since all this. +RACHEL: Wh——Why don’t I tell you over here? +RACHEL: You look, you look big. +RACHEL: Joey. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I met, II met, I met Monica when we were just a couple of six year olds and I became friends with Chandler when he was 25, although he seemed like a six year old. +RACHEL: That is not a tattoo, that is a nothing. +RACHEL: First of all, I’m so sorry about my father yelling at you, but I heard you totally held your own. +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Yeah, but then you spent Phoebe's entire birthday party talking to my breasts, so then I figured maybe not. +RACHEL: Umm, y'know what though Mon, I actually do have a lot of work to do so if-if are you sure there's just not anything else? +RACHEL: Yeah, I know, go long. +RACHEL: You ah, you didn’t say ‘Yes’ to that did you? +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Oh my gosh! +RACHEL: Nevermind. +RACHEL: Oh my God, Ross, Ross, Ben just said 'Hi'. +RACHEL: All right Ross! +RACHEL: What’d I do?! +RACHEL: I can see that. +RACHEL: This is totally your fault! +RACHEL: That is the sweetest thing, I just. +RACHEL: So it wouldn’t be awkward! +RACHEL: The point is, I really—I think everything’s gonna be okay. +RACHEL: Do you got anything for me? +RACHEL: C'mon, talk to me. +RACHEL: Joey, where did you learn that word? +RACHEL: Well hey, I’ve got a ton of these! +RACHEL: Ross, you have to understand that your nice thing makes us feel this big. +RACHEL: Oh see, but Joanie loved Chachi! +RACHEL: Your agent called. +RACHEL: No, but I was doing my thing and everything was going according to the plan! +RACHEL: Yeah well, I’mI’m a slut. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: There was nothing wrong with her! +RACHEL: Hi, remember us? +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: Alright, you know what? +RACHEL: Okay, umm, I’m gonna get my sweater. +RACHEL: All right, I'm gonna make more margaritas! +RACHEL: I’m gonna pick up some really good stuff for you. +RACHEL: And this is not the only hospital in this city and we have no problem to—Whoa! +RACHEL: Well there you go. +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: Ow ow ow. +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: Well, I was kinda supposed to be headed for Aruba on my honeymoon, so nothing! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Hey, now wait a minute! +RACHEL: Ok, I'm sorry, I'm just not very good with babies. +RACHEL: Oh well, the woman I interviewed with was pretty tough, but y'know thank God Mark coached me, because once I started talking about the fall line, she got all happy and wouldn't shut up. +RACHEL: What carrer? +RACHEL: What do you mean? +RACHEL: Do-do you have any clothes on? +RACHEL: It is a waste. +RACHEL: Well, if it makes you feel any better, I made a fool out of myself. +RACHEL: Well, apparently he scares easy. +RACHEL: I'll miss you. +RACHEL: Ohhhh! +RACHEL: I swear I didn’t see anything, and I don’t want to know! +RACHEL: We're so sorry we're late. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Tag is not the father! +RACHEL: How was your day? +RACHEL: All right, first name on the speed dial is mom. +RACHEL: Not nature, fashion! +RACHEL: I don’t know. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Nooo! +RACHEL: Oh my god, it's Barry and Mindy! +RACHEL: Well, I guess that's all in the past, now. +RACHEL: There’s a piece that doesn’t have floor on it! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Good different? +RACHEL: It's like she's a nympho! +RACHEL: Oh Joey, I’m sorry I just couldn’t tell her all those things you wanted me to tell her. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, yeah he-he told me. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: So did they call you to tell you your name’s gonna be in this? +RACHEL: Say hi to Wally. +RACHEL: Although I do know that your uh, your favorite ice cream flavor is butter pecan. +RACHEL: What about you honey, who would be on your list? +RACHEL: Don’t say that! +RACHEL: Should I help you clean up? +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Oh yeah, no, what’s that? +RACHEL: Mom, would you relax. +RACHEL: Okay great, hold on a sec! +RACHEL: Yeah, I’m good. +RACHEL: So, Chip, how's umm, Amy Welch? +RACHEL: Oh honey. +RACHEL: Oh Ross! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Can't believe I'm risking this again, but you're on! +RACHEL: Oh my God, when the boy's love makes the rabbit real! +RACHEL: Then, second of all you're not actually gonna have sex with him! +RACHEL: Well, I don’t think they need any help. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, it's fine, it's fine. +RACHEL: Ok, uh, maybe you're not always going after the wrong girl. +RACHEL: How would you feel about taking out my assistant Tag? +RACHEL: I know, but it's just it's the first time, and I just don't want her to think that because I didn't marry Barry, that my life is total crap, you know? +RACHEL: Well, I wouldn't know because I got so freaked out that I hung up the phone. +RACHEL: Louisa? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: You're right, I don't have to apologize. +RACHEL: It’s Ross. +RACHEL: Puzzler. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Yeah, right away Mr. Kaplan. +RACHEL: and I know Chandler is kidding but it happens every time he touches my stomach. +RACHEL: Oh, I mean she’s gonna be at the wedding waiting for him and people will be whispering, Oh that poor girl. +RACHEL: Yes, I know! +RACHEL: Joey. +RACHEL: There’s no room for a baby here. +RACHEL: Oh, I can't believe I did this! +RACHEL: Nooooo! +RACHEL: Everybody, this is Paolo. +RACHEL: Your a funny guy! +RACHEL: Oh-okay, look pal, I am not in the mood to be hit on right now! +RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry! +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: But what about you? +RACHEL: Okay now Joey, y'know that since you're returning all of this stuff right after the audition you're gonna have to wear underwear? +RACHEL: With yellow feathers, feathers in her hair, and a dress cut down to there. +RACHEL: Can you grab me some toilet paper? +RACHEL: And he didn't want you guys to know about it but I came over here to tell you! +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: What am I going to do? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: You let Ross drive the Porsche and when I ask you, you say you’re the only one who’s allowed to drive it. +RACHEL: Let's not say anything else. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Well, in my defense, you were not supposed to tell each other. +RACHEL: No, I don’t see it! +RACHEL: I guess you don't. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh, see, this is what I'm talking about! +RACHEL: Oh my God, Jill! +RACHEL: Y'know what, you are mean boys, who are just being mean! +RACHEL: I mean why, of all people would you want to go out with Chip?! +RACHEL: Oh, I just had such an idea of what this day would be like, you know? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Well, there you go. +RACHEL: This is going to be your first Thanksgiving. +RACHEL: Sandy you're hired. +RACHEL: Oh crap! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: I’ve been trying so hard not to be my mother I did not see this comin’. +RACHEL: Yeah, looks that way. +RACHEL: Ohh, I mean, we were really drunk. +RACHEL: Monica’s moving! +RACHEL: Ross, I am a human doodle! +RACHEL: And you are so in style right now. +RACHEL: Go on! +RACHEL: Me?! +RACHEL: Emma! +RACHEL: I still don't get to see you. +RACHEL: Yeah, just give me a minute! +RACHEL: My whole mouth just filled with saliva! +RACHEL: I've been watching this guy over there, I don't think he came with a kid! +RACHEL: Oh please, you inhale your food! +RACHEL: Yeah, you know, it's tough. +RACHEL: You're audition is not until tomorrow. +RACHEL: So ah, did you have fun at the bachelor party last night? +RACHEL: I have got to get ready and go to a dinner at my bosses house. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Ok, look you guys, I really don't want to get into this right now. +RACHEL: Man, that one is funny. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Maybe. +RACHEL: Come on, you guys will watch it with me. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Urkel in Spanish is Urkel. +RACHEL: I mean if she just died this morning out of respect. +RACHEL: Hey, how'd the catering go? +RACHEL: We have fun, don’t we Ben? +RACHEL: That's great, great. +RACHEL: Oh, go on! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Did you poo in the shoe? +RACHEL: Thanks! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: You know, he normally doesn't drink like this. +RACHEL: Horny bitch. +RACHEL: I do. +RACHEL: Bye you guys! +RACHEL: That’s right, I am a married woman! +RACHEL: Bye-bye Julie. +RACHEL: Ah, well we'll just see about that, okay. +RACHEL: What's the big deal? +RACHEL: Check if it’s wet, check if it’s hungry, burp it! +RACHEL: You tell him, Nice try. +RACHEL: Oh honey, I gotta go. +RACHEL: Ya know, I mean this is supposed to be a joyous occasion. +RACHEL: My maid of honour, Mindy?! +RACHEL: What the hell was that? +RACHEL: Happy Halloween! +RACHEL: No, I will. +RACHEL: He didn't turn me down! +RACHEL: I was just trying to teach you. +RACHEL: Come here, Ben. +RACHEL: Well, hello, Mr. Rachel! +RACHEL: Right Pheebs, she can stay with us? +RACHEL: I’ll call you back. +RACHEL: I just y'know, I didn’t expect him to be this happy so soon. +RACHEL: Because a car backfired? +RACHEL: What are we doing? +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Or I’ll give them to my new boyfriend, Joshua. +RACHEL: Joey? +RACHEL: Well yeah, I wish that you would. +RACHEL: See you and hug you. +RACHEL: Uh… You didn’t propose to me, Chandler didn’t propose to me, but Joey did. +RACHEL: Oh shoot! +RACHEL: Well, but Pheebs. +RACHEL: Well that was depressing, I think I just bought a soft pretzel from one of the kids from Fame. +RACHEL: Nope. +RACHEL: You guys, you're never gonna believe what I just found tacked up on a telephone pole! +RACHEL: Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. +RACHEL: Why did you do this?! +RACHEL: On Melanie Griffith in Working girl. +RACHEL: I told her ours was an original. +RACHEL: Uh Pheebs, we just actually kinda wanted to be alone. +RACHEL: Oh Phoebe! +RACHEL: I haven’t felt my feet in years! +RACHEL: What, and then you just came in here and paraded it right under Jill’s nose when you know she’s trying to quit. +RACHEL: I mean we have enough trouble with guys stealing our wind without taking it from each other. +RACHEL: I’ve been sailing my whole life. +RACHEL: Oh but Phoebe, we’re gonna be late for the movie. +RACHEL: And I loved being Fun Aunt Rachel but I’ll go back to being Boring and Uncomfortable Aunt Rachel if that’s what you want! +RACHEL: No, no, no, we’re not married. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I can’t do this. +RACHEL: Well, I met Danny's sister yesterday, and uh that was actually the girl on the subway. +RACHEL: Why don't you talk to someone who's had a baby. +RACHEL: This is unbelievable. +RACHEL: This is gonna be great. +RACHEL: Alright, c'mon! +RACHEL: Head Ross! +RACHEL: What are you a girl? +RACHEL: That's Molly, she's sick. +RACHEL: What’s important is how was she? +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: You don't tell a guy that you're looking for a serious relationship! +RACHEL: Then, we had this big, stupid fight, and I said I wanted to take a break, I don’t want to take a break. +RACHEL: All right, now I’m just gonna need you to step to the port side. +RACHEL: You are getting married! +RACHEL: Ahh! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Okay, it’s just—and this is really embarrassing—but lately with this whole pregnancy thing I’m just finding myself…how do I put this umm, erotically charged. +RACHEL: I mean, I,I will cleeeean it. +RACHEL: Look! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Well, here's another question for ya. +RACHEL: Hey Phoebe, can I talk to you for a second? +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: Umm, Webster’s Dictionary defines marriage as. +RACHEL: Look, I'll make a deal with you all right? +RACHEL: I’m Rachel Green. +RACHEL: I mean, I gave Barry up, right? +RACHEL: Ohh please don't be from a real dinosaur! +RACHEL: I can get a quick bite to eat, but then I have to come back up here. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: That's not, that's not right, no RossRoss, come on! +RACHEL: WATCH HER HAIR! +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: Yeah, sure. +RACHEL: He used to yell at me all the time on the boat, I mean it was horrible. +RACHEL: Y'know what? +RACHEL: Oh God oh! +RACHEL: Nooooo, why? +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: Ok Ross, just so you know, calling it a poopie diaper doesn't make this process any cuter. +RACHEL: Thanks! +RACHEL: Hi, I'm sorry, I need to borrow your phone for just one minute. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: What, what’s it, what’s going on? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Now that she's eating solid food, she poops around the clock. +RACHEL: I know, I get it, but Mona, what relationship is not complicated? +RACHEL: Did you get all this stuff for Joey to try and drive me out of the apartment? +RACHEL: Oh, well, that's - that's very sweet. +RACHEL: Oh, you're gonna be great! +RACHEL: You made me laugh! +RACHEL: You, your immaturity? +RACHEL: Why not? +RACHEL: Joey, get Amy's bags, she is moving out! +RACHEL: There he is! +RACHEL: God! +RACHEL: I like living with Joey. +RACHEL: But the thing is need to find a date. +RACHEL: When’s her birthday?! +RACHEL: Y’know, bonus night. +RACHEL: You're about well uh, this one is large. +RACHEL: Oooh, you're sweet, I knew uncle Joey would step up. +RACHEL: Honey, I'm so sorry, but it looks like I'm gonna be here all night. +RACHEL: Ahhhhh, salmon skin roll. +RACHEL: Don't let him in! +RACHEL: I think now would be a really good time to talk to him. +RACHEL: Hi, who was that? +RACHEL: Sophie’s desk. +RACHEL: Well how can that be, you were just kissing Sabrina? +RACHEL: Where's Chip, why isn't he here yet? +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: Okay, first of all, if you keep calling it that, no one's gonna ever take it. +RACHEL: Okay bye-bye.' +RACHEL: It’s not kicking right now. +RACHEL: I love you. +RACHEL: So now, Super Gavin, when I come back where are you planning on flying off to? +RACHEL: And an iced tea. +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Grape. +RACHEL: Oh hi! +RACHEL: Well, have fun! +RACHEL: Ok, great! +RACHEL: Can you do that? +RACHEL: I’m just doing it to get back at Ross. +RACHEL: I heard you before, that is so not what this is! +RACHEL: Oh my God what? +RACHEL: Do you see what all the guys see in her? +RACHEL: Joey, no: this is wrong! +RACHEL: Oh y’know what? +RACHEL: I am so gonna leave right now. +RACHEL: Y’know what, you are mean boys, who are just being mean! +RACHEL: And you really think this is a good idea? +RACHEL: Now, she thinks that I made out with him and I did it to get her job. +RACHEL: Oh as, as opposed to your other multi-functional nipples? +RACHEL: Please, please, please. +RACHEL: Aw, honey, that's so sweet. +RACHEL: Can I take a message? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Okay, I heard that. +RACHEL: Oh it does, it does! +RACHEL: Well, then I lost it. +RACHEL: I gotta go, I gotta date, with a man. +RACHEL: What. +RACHEL: Okay, well then bring her in. +RACHEL: Well, it’d better not be about the apartment pants, because I just pitched the idea to my boss at Ralph Lauren and she loved it. +RACHEL: Man, you can lie about Sweden! +RACHEL: That's not what we're gonna do! +RACHEL: How do you feel about Diet Coke? +RACHEL: No, I meant with the dropper over here. +RACHEL: But Tag's not coming his girlfriend came into town, so he's spending Thanksgiving with her. +RACHEL: Uhh… I think I just got engaged. +RACHEL: Nooo! +RACHEL: There were two, I picked the bigger one. +RACHEL: I think what you want is over here. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Pretty much. +RACHEL: Ok Sexy, sexy, very sexy, sexy. +RACHEL: Ohh no you don’t! +RACHEL: Oh Monica, we are so sorry. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: No honey, okay, okay, you wanna know why Ross canceled the date? +RACHEL: You still think of it as your apartment, don't you? +RACHEL: Which puts me right back in the driver seat. +RACHEL: I mean, we still care about each other. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: No Mon that's not the point. +RACHEL: That's interesting, since she died seven years ago! +RACHEL: Yeah, but how much can you tell from a look? +RACHEL: Three centimeters? +RACHEL: You can make fun of me. +RACHEL: Okay, I’m not your mother. +RACHEL: Yeah, and not a very good one. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Okay, um, I. +RACHEL: Mon, I don't understand. +RACHEL: All righty, I’m gonna run a couple of errands and I will see you at dinner. +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: I will kill you. +RACHEL: That's just great. +RACHEL: Oh y’know what? +RACHEL: Oh, good point. +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: But I do not want to have everything decided for me. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Amy. +RACHEL: Come on tell me your moves. +RACHEL: What are you talking about?! +RACHEL: Oh, yeah. +RACHEL: Oh mom, I swear I’m not an idiot. +RACHEL: Look, whatever this relationship stuff that Emily wants, just give it to her. +RACHEL: Come on little girl, hi! +RACHEL: I’m just kidding—Seriously, gal pal Rachel Green. +RACHEL: I want Gladys! +RACHEL: Well, can I keep the presents and still be 29? +RACHEL: Yellow cake, chocolate frosting with nuts! +RACHEL: Why don't we all pitch in 50 bucks, we'll pool our money together and then if we win, we'll split it! +RACHEL: Thank you, Okay, Okay. +RACHEL: Okay, that we may be able to do. +RACHEL: No because first they arrest the guy and then they try him. +RACHEL: This is an eggshell from the first time you made me breakfast in bed! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Mia Hamm! +RACHEL: I’m sorry, but Ross you kicked off your shoes! +RACHEL: You have never been able to break up with her. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Oh honey, are you jealous of Paolo? +RACHEL: I KNOW! +RACHEL: Yeah, okay, I'll see you later. +RACHEL: Well you said black. +RACHEL: Well, as a single woman, who is available, I think you look great! +RACHEL: We gotta go, we got dinner! +RACHEL: Y'know what, actually. +RACHEL: Hi, I’d like to order a pizza. +RACHEL: See?! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: That is a dot. +RACHEL: Ah! +RACHEL: I like big butts and I cannot lie, you. +RACHEL: And my husband he’s a lawyer! +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: You told this guy that I was looking for a fling?! +RACHEL: Phoebe, II think Ross is right. +RACHEL: OK. +RACHEL: I mean I work in fashion and all I meet are eligible straight men. +RACHEL: No way Phoebe! +RACHEL: I’m just kidding too. +RACHEL: Noo, that's our unbelievably loud upstairs neighbor. +RACHEL: Well, it matters to me! +RACHEL: Y’know, maybe they didn’t take it the way I meant it. +RACHEL: I didn't know that. +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: I think it's okay that we see other people. +RACHEL: What future boyfriends? +RACHEL: It's not over until someone says, I do. +RACHEL: All I'm saying is. +RACHEL: I love them! +RACHEL: What, what, what? +RACHEL: Well, what-what happened to your girlfriend? +RACHEL: Come here! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I do. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Alright. +RACHEL: We’re not gonna want it! +RACHEL: Oh…Oh! +RACHEL: Hey, y’know what? +RACHEL: You’re right, you’re right. +RACHEL: medium hmm any cookies left? +RACHEL: Oh, come on kids! +RACHEL: Oh, but look how straight those noodles are! +RACHEL: Well, ever since I was humiliated and yelled at in front of my friends, I'm just, I don't know, not in a museum benefitty kind of mood. +RACHEL: Ross, what is taking you so long? +RACHEL: Ooh, your brother. +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: Oh, Monica, you think Skippy liked you? +RACHEL: And if it’s a girl? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Thanks sweetie. +RACHEL: Why, just because you're not mature enough to understand something like that? +RACHEL: Big Daddy? +RACHEL: I mean, I mean I was gonna be homeless. +RACHEL: Nobody. +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: Her name was Lola. +RACHEL: Uh, well can we, can we get you anything Mr. Zelner? +RACHEL: Yes, but, Fonzie was already cool, so he wasn't hurt, right? +RACHEL: Oh, please, miss, you don't understand! +RACHEL: Well then why didn’t you tell me that before?! +RACHEL: Take it back! +RACHEL: Nothing? +RACHEL: Oh y'know what, we don’t have to talk about work. +RACHEL: BACK OFF! +RACHEL: Ok, I'm gonna get my stuff. +RACHEL: You'll just gonna hate yourself if you don't. +RACHEL: I did not use my keycard yesterday. +RACHEL: But if you give me your number I will call you some other time. +RACHEL: Well why didn’t you take the job? +RACHEL: Hey, Chandler, don't freak out! +RACHEL: Joshua. +RACHEL: That makes up for everything! +RACHEL: Y'know what? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: We really, really have to do something about that. +RACHEL: Joey, what-what are you doing going into my bedroom?! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I’mI’m kinda thinking it-it was the lobster. +RACHEL: Bye. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: I'm so dead serious. +RACHEL: Oh forget it! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: What is this? +RACHEL: It's spelled like Gukki, which could be confusing. +RACHEL: Mindy?! +RACHEL: Um, ok, uh, oh god, um, when you and uh Ross first started going out, it was really hard for me, um, for many reasons, which I'm not gonna bore you with now, but um, I just, I see how happy he is, you know, and how good you guys are together, and um, Monica's always saying how nice you are, and god I hate it when she's right. +RACHEL: Oh, I think I’m gonna wake her up. +RACHEL: 4 o’clock. +RACHEL: I am so proud of Joey, I can't believe he's going to be on Law amp Order! +RACHEL: Ross, things aren't gonna be weird between us, right? +RACHEL: Check it out! +RACHEL: And heels. +RACHEL: So now he's all ooh, coming up with this whole I've got a party thing y'know, trying to get me to hint around for an invitation. +RACHEL: Uh, wh-why? +RACHEL: She thought you were cute. +RACHEL: Well, you might want to tell him it sounds like his wife is gay. +RACHEL: Ugh, it was horrible! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: No, I am not getting in a car with Ross, we will just have to live here! +RACHEL: Oh really?! +RACHEL: Guess! +RACHEL: Only 'cause you took up half the circle. +RACHEL: Thanks! +RACHEL: This is the worst date ever. +RACHEL: Well, I assume I'll have to take showers with him, but y'know, that's true of any job. +RACHEL: Well Phoebe, we gotta do something! +RACHEL: They didn't actually say that. +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: Well! +RACHEL: Tell Monica I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Yeah I know it’s really boring, but it’s like a big deal. +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh, how does he look? +RACHEL: Wait, what am I gonna do? +RACHEL: Yeah that-that would’ve been a much simpler problem. +RACHEL: OK. Ohhh! +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: I can't seem to get Ross out of my head. +RACHEL: Uh! +RACHEL: It��s just that, Kate bothered me. +RACHEL: Yay! +RACHEL: Yes, absolutely. +RACHEL: It’s not a miracle Joey! +RACHEL: You guys would just like get together and like just say mean things about me? +RACHEL: Well, y’know what? +RACHEL: I think it's sexy. +RACHEL: Oh, well, we can hand it to Gunther and he'll put it in lost and found. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I mean you'd forgive me if I fogged you. +RACHEL: Oh, ooh, everything looks delicious. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Watch. +RACHEL: And I can’t stop it! +RACHEL: Can I please speak to your supervisor? +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Uhm, you haven't told these guys what they're doing in the wedding yet. +RACHEL: Hi, it's Rachel Green from upstairs. +RACHEL: Honey listen. +RACHEL: Does anyone even know what an apothecary is? +RACHEL: Me neither. +RACHEL: For all I care, he can throw her through the damn thing. +RACHEL: What are you talking about, Ross, you just said that you read it twice! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Okay, I’m done. +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: Maybe, this is not about seizing stuff. +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Yes, I am! +RACHEL: So you could probably really use one of those plug-in telephone headsets huh? +RACHEL: I can't believe it! +RACHEL: RACHEL: Agghhh. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Joey did. +RACHEL: Bye-bye, Joey. +RACHEL: Chandler, I gotta tell you, I love your mom's books! +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: Here. +RACHEL: Oh come on Ross! +RACHEL: You think that will work? +RACHEL: Well—Really? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Ugh, how can you even ask that question?! +RACHEL: Ross, why didn’t you tell me that? +RACHEL: Barry was the guy that I was almost married and Mindy was my best friend. +RACHEL: Well um, I don't. +RACHEL: It was an impulse. +RACHEL: Ohh-ho-hooohhh. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: I don’t—Whoa! +RACHEL: Well, II should've told you the truth. +RACHEL: Yeah actually, I think we’re gonna take off too. +RACHEL: I got it! +RACHEL: Well Joey, uhm look, I know that she’s difficult, but I think it’s really good that she’s here. +RACHEL: How did it go with Erin? +RACHEL: Why, where are you going? +RACHEL: Is this actually a lunchbox? +RACHEL: I'm not crazy, right? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Is that weird for you? +RACHEL: Huh-hoo, yeah, no, it's still basil. +RACHEL: Oh Amy, you remember Ross. +RACHEL: I went really long. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: But no, I actually smoke the regular ones all, all the time. +RACHEL: I don't actually have a boyfriend. +RACHEL: I just, I feel, II just. +RACHEL: Right, I'll see you guys later. +RACHEL: That’s so Monica can keep track. +RACHEL: Oh God, I'm sorry! +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Yeah, sure. +RACHEL: Oh, great. +RACHEL: So now, I think Emma is probably down for the night, but if you need anything Ross. +RACHEL: Oh, come on, miss, isn't there any way that you can just let me off. +RACHEL: Oh there he is now, the father of my child, the porn king of the west village. +RACHEL: All it really was was just, ya know, meaningless animal sex. +RACHEL: Startin’ to feel her again there are we? +RACHEL: Oh and Ross, almost got something that wasn’t on the list. +RACHEL: That's true, we can do this. +RACHEL: I just sang a. +RACHEL: You are friends with Dr. Drake Remoray? +RACHEL: This is hard. +RACHEL: Oh, honey, oh that's OK. Oh, thank God. +RACHEL: Kiss me. +RACHEL: Tell me about your day. +RACHEL: No, no, no. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Me or Smokey Smokerson? +RACHEL: Me too! +RACHEL: Look look look look look, my first pay check! +RACHEL: How do you think this suit will look on an assistant buyer? +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: I'm on a date. +RACHEL: Can’t we just flip a coin?! +RACHEL: Y’know, I know that I said that I am totally okay with Ross getting married, but as it turns out, I don’t think I’m handling it all that well. +RACHEL: And he has the most beautiful name, I never realised it, Joshua! +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: I guess I can talk to one of my supervisors. +RACHEL: Daddy, I need to talk to you. +RACHEL: Please. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I mean, who here does not have the time to get to know Julie? +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Well-well you can give them to me! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Well, because she loves you and because you love her. +RACHEL: No, I think I'm gonna catch up on my correspondence. +RACHEL: I'm not reading this! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Hey-hey-hey that's funny! +RACHEL: I told my boss I liked this line of lingerie, she ordered a ton of it. +RACHEL: I mean what if this keeps happening? +RACHEL: Ross, the guy is a very, very successful lawyer! +RACHEL: Monica, you don’t even have a bed, you sleep in a ball on the floor! +RACHEL: So shake it! +RACHEL: And, I y'know, I don’t want to get back together over a machine. +RACHEL: They're your underwear. +RACHEL: So from that you think you've got me all figured out? +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: What did you say? +RACHEL: I don't know, you tell me. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: This is why Billy Tratt would just stay in this region! +RACHEL: Why not? +RACHEL: I don't care! +RACHEL: Sit down! +RACHEL: Okay, what? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh, you’re kidding! +RACHEL: Well, you're not totally paranoid. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: People are getting a little antsy waiting Emma to wake up from her nap, so would you mind performing them once now? +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: They’re not true? +RACHEL: Oh, of course! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I’m sorry. +RACHEL: You like that? +RACHEL: Oh God I just cannot imagine what is gonna happen if Chandler doesn’t show up! +RACHEL: I mean, when I was little, everybody's parents were getting divorced. +RACHEL: And I came to a TV star’s apartment to have an affair! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: You wanna do it?! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Uh, II had a drink with lunch. +RACHEL: Were you just talking to yourself? +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Y’know when like the cameras are on you and you wanna look disappointed, but also that your colleague deserved to win. +RACHEL: All right, well, if you must know. +RACHEL: Oh Ross, hi! +RACHEL: I can’t do it. +RACHEL: Spoiled? +RACHEL: Are they right? +RACHEL: Ross, Ross, please listen to me. +RACHEL: Hey Chandler! +RACHEL: Now, how would you feel if the one person that you trusted the most in the world not only thinks them too, but actually uses them as reasons not to be with you. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Oh, did you not want people to know that? +RACHEL: And to have to hear about it from Gunther! +RACHEL: There is no ball. +RACHEL: Nothing. +RACHEL: Would you let me talk. +RACHEL: Tah-daaah! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: But y'know I just don't embarrass that easily. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Umm, hi! +RACHEL: No sorry hon, Monica's orders. +RACHEL: I can't marry him! +RACHEL: I mean, with the holidays coming up I wanted him to meet my family. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I actually miss her. +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: Right? +RACHEL: I'm ok! +RACHEL: Are you kiddin'? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Right! +RACHEL: Just get away from me! +RACHEL: I don't know! +RACHEL: Together. +RACHEL: Yeah, and I am okay with being a pushover. +RACHEL: Oh-oh! +RACHEL: See? +RACHEL: The spring line, it’s really going to be great this year, huh? +RACHEL: Everybody. +RACHEL: How long have you known? +RACHEL: You guys this cat is nothing like my grandmother's cat. +RACHEL: Hi Pheebs! +RACHEL: We all do it. +RACHEL: Well, I was going to, but then I figured, you know, you're food is so delicious and perfect, you can never have too many of those pumpkin things. +RACHEL: Oh my God, it's so huge, but you just have to promise me that you cannot tell anyone. +RACHEL: You look like you’re gonna be the. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Look Joey, it’s enough all right?! +RACHEL: Well you uh, you were always really good at the uh, at the uh the stuff. +RACHEL: And meanwhile, the party is tomorrow and we still don’t have a guest list. +RACHEL: OK, fine, fine, we can switch. +RACHEL: I know you did! +RACHEL: I am an excellent driver! +RACHEL: Well would you like me to lie down on the table? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Monana, it's for you, the credit card people. +RACHEL: Why not? +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Well, then I get to give him the cell phone. +RACHEL: But wait! +RACHEL: Be sexy. +RACHEL: I’mI’m—I had no idea. +RACHEL: Look out for the horse! +RACHEL: That’s a good story, Grandpa. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, well, Yeah, no use wasting this baby, just lyin’ around the house. +RACHEL: Yeah, IIII’m funny Ben, but I’m not stupid. +RACHEL: Check it out! +RACHEL: Well, actually, I meant for me. +RACHEL: I'll see you tomorrow. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: I just gave away the ending, didn't I? +RACHEL: We really are. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Yeah, sure. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Phoebe, just the idea of pitting one baby against another, I mean, you know, and judging who's cuter just for a trophy. +RACHEL: I wouldn't. +RACHEL: Well, it wasn't just me, alright? +RACHEL: Do you think I should go up there? +RACHEL: The summer after ninth grade he sees me in a two-piece for the first time, his obsession begins to grow. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Stop spending my money! +RACHEL: Well it stupid, unfair question! +RACHEL: It's Sunday night, and he didn't call. +RACHEL: As are you. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: A smile goes a long way. +RACHEL: Shut up! +RACHEL: I love it at Joey’s! +RACHEL: That’s a great story. +RACHEL: Argh. +RACHEL: Okay bye, call me when you get this message. +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: Don’t call us that! +RACHEL: Well umm. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Ohh, and the nicest girlfriend! +RACHEL: I would like to take you and your fear. +RACHEL: Do you have any ice? +RACHEL: I’m gonna have a baby. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: No seriously, y’know the contracts I gave you, did you overnight them? +RACHEL: That is the best fake speech I think I’ve ever heard. +RACHEL: Ross. +RACHEL: Oh, Ross, you had to, I mean, he was humping everything in sight. +RACHEL: You wanted to see me? +RACHEL: Ohhh, you got my message. +RACHEL: We’re having a girl? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Because. +RACHEL: Oh, look at you, all sexy. +RACHEL: Good night. +RACHEL: I just feel bad about all that sleep you're gonna miss wishing you were with me! +RACHEL: So-so, you missed a message from who? +RACHEL: Honey, why don’t you sit down? +RACHEL: Do you feel it too? +RACHEL: Any luck? +RACHEL: You and that girl from that copy place, which yesterday you took full responsibility for! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: No more crying! +RACHEL: Whe-ell, look at you, finally got that time machine workin' huh? +RACHEL: Look, I cannot do this right now, okay, I've got a deadline, would you just go home, I'll talk to you later. +RACHEL: Hi Dina! +RACHEL: Oh, around 8:30? +RACHEL: How, wha. +RACHEL: I bought the same one! +RACHEL: Oh my God, Phoebe, are you gonna go to jail?! +RACHEL: Well, does a good student drink seven beers during his first lesson? +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Oh, I so wanted Ross to know first, but I’m so relieved you guys know. +RACHEL: Your sunglasses?! +RACHEL: I cannot believe that after ten years, you do not know ONE thing about me. +RACHEL: Promise me, you will end it. +RACHEL: Monica relax! +RACHEL: Aw what are you?! +RACHEL: Oh, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Whoa-whoa-whoa, let’s say more! +RACHEL: C'mon Daddy, listen to me! +RACHEL: He is going to marry that other. +RACHEL: Pheebs, if I had never met him this never would have happened! +RACHEL: Umm, what-what do you, what do you mean is there something wrong with Ross? +RACHEL: Well, Ross, we were worried about you. +RACHEL: It’s still——It’s got a tail! +RACHEL: Oh, ok, which one? +RACHEL: And then you chase away the one guy that I actually liked! +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: If there was I wouldn't tell you. +RACHEL: Even when I found out umm, all right, well let's just say I found something out something about someone and let's just say she's gonna keep it. +RACHEL: Ohh, ohh. +RACHEL: Why, how much is this gonna cost? +RACHEL: Forget that! +RACHEL: Oh wow, this feels weird. +RACHEL: Look Emma, look who's baaack! +RACHEL: If you hold a spider. +RACHEL: Well, oh, Mark, I’m doing this for the wrong reasons, y'know? +RACHEL: Well, you're the one who wants to fire him, so you're gonna have to do it. +RACHEL: No it’s not! +RACHEL: I came with Paul! +RACHEL: More than jewelry. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: These are happy tears! +RACHEL: Oh, yeah. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh, hi. +RACHEL: Hey Mon, little question for ya! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Hey y’know, I’m so sorry to hear about you and Elizabeth. +RACHEL: Which gives Prada four years to start making maternity clothes! +RACHEL: All right are you guys gonna come down? +RACHEL: Look, I know you guys heard about the whole thing with me and Ross but y'know, I've been obsessing about it all day and I'd just love not to talk about it. +RACHEL: I mean it was small, but kind of spectacular. +RACHEL: Do we always have to do everything together? +RACHEL: Nice to meet you. +RACHEL: I think I can't get out for the play. +RACHEL: Come on, you do what you want to do. +RACHEL: I’m sorry. +RACHEL: I didn’t even go to how huge this was going to be for the father. +RACHEL: Of course we can wait. +RACHEL: Honey, if you wanted to do that, you might as well just gotten him a fish, you know how fish freaked me out! +RACHEL: Well, she-she ob-obviously saw the tire tracks that were leading up to the closed garage. +RACHEL: So are things with you and Joey any better? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: I'm naked! +RACHEL: Okay, you gotta give me some of your piece. +RACHEL: Yeah, that would be nice actually, to have the apartment to myself for a night. +RACHEL: Look what I did! +RACHEL: I knew it. +RACHEL: You know what Joey, forget it. +RACHEL: Just so you know, we-we didn't mean to fog you, we thought you were like a yeti or something. +RACHEL: Actually, I was about to bid on this lovely trip to Paris. +RACHEL: Yeah I know. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Don't hit on your existing friends! +RACHEL: Yeah, gotcha. +RACHEL: Oh, great hat. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, she can't be herself. +RACHEL: I’m gonna need a copy of those. +RACHEL: Look honey y’know what? +RACHEL: ooh. +RACHEL: Oh, lucky me! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Okay, okay, okay, what's so funny over here? +RACHEL: Well maybe I'll just stay here with Monica. +RACHEL: Where've you been? +RACHEL: Mr. Heckles, Mr. Heckles could you help me please? +RACHEL: That is hard to say, Ross. +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: I'm sorry, obviously Heather's ass has something more important to say so I'll just wait 'till it's finished. +RACHEL: You couldn't just leave it alone. +RACHEL: Yes, hi! +RACHEL: Now come on Bobby, why don’t you tell us a little bit about your band? +RACHEL: You got it! +RACHEL: Awww, just like his daddy. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh Joey this is crazy! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Phoebe. +RACHEL: I’m sorry I didn’t tell you but you were so mad already! +RACHEL: You've got to stop doing that. +RACHEL: Ohh, so do you! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I wish I could play with you more, but I’ve got to go to work! +RACHEL: Maybe some chocolates? +RACHEL: Does she have a view? +RACHEL: We'll just act casual. +RACHEL: Wow, this is a tough one. +RACHEL: Huh, Ross. +RACHEL: At the Copa, Coo-pa Ca-ban-a, music and fashion were always the passion, at the Copa. +RACHEL: Joey, would you slow down, they're not gonna be sold out of papers at one o'clock in the morning. +RACHEL: So I went to the store and got some stuff to baby-proof the apartment. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh, I blew it. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Men just take out wind? +RACHEL: That is so unfair. +RACHEL: Can I ask you a question? +RACHEL: Monica what? +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: Hey Joey, what ‘cha doing? +RACHEL: Oh, okay, well, I think we should let Phoebe decide, because she’s the only who’s impartial, and she’s so pretty. +RACHEL: This is ridiculous! +RACHEL: Wait, how long is Denise gone for? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Why is he jumping on those women! +RACHEL: Oh, well, she's asleep now. +RACHEL: And I know he’s my assistant and I can’t date him but it just bothers me, all right?! +RACHEL: How long have you known her, like. +RACHEL: I ah Oh! +RACHEL: What’s up? +RACHEL: Ok, while you mmm on it for awhile, I'm gonna go find a place for my new lamp. +RACHEL: It’s you guys! +RACHEL: I’m sorry, you were talking about Emily! +RACHEL: I don't know! +RACHEL: We'll try to keep it down. +RACHEL: You-you get all that peace and quiet that you’ve always wanted! +RACHEL: I mean, when I'm with him, I'm totally, totally. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: OK? +RACHEL: Well, it doesn’t sound like it! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: That is so good! +RACHEL: Let me come, I will behave, I promise! +RACHEL: He left work in the middle of the day to do a personal errand and left you in charge when you’ve been working here two days? +RACHEL: Umm let me think. +RACHEL: All right, let's do it. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Geez! +RACHEL: No Joe, no miracle. +RACHEL: Well, you ladies are not the only ones living the dream. +RACHEL: by the way, can I borrow some Rum from your place? +RACHEL: Yeah, Joey honey, I don't know if this'll mean anything to you but you'll always be pre-approved with us. +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Hello. +RACHEL: Oh, let me push, can I push? +RACHEL: Oh Joey, this ring I…it’s beautiful I love it! +RACHEL: I mean sex does not have to be a big deal! +RACHEL: You found my book?! +RACHEL: What are you talking about?! +RACHEL: Look. +RACHEL: Any sign of your brother? +RACHEL: That’s your whole name, okay of course it is! +RACHEL: Ooh! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Does everybody hate these shoes? +RACHEL: Okay, swear you won’t tell, but when Mark left he gave me a key to Joanna’s office. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: All right, look, here's the bottom line Ross, this is fixable, if we act fast, okay. +RACHEL: It really was. +RACHEL: Oh my God, I cannot believe this. +RACHEL: Ross, listen, if you do not get this annulment, I will! +RACHEL: I didn’t! +RACHEL: You know that depends on what it is! +RACHEL: I feel awful. +RACHEL: Oh, it’s so sad they never had a chance to meet. +RACHEL: Until y’know, he screamed out Radisson at the end. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: And I also wanted you guys to know that I am telling the father today. +RACHEL: Um. +RACHEL: Oh it’s umm, it’s tofu cake. +RACHEL: I can’t even look at you right now! +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Listen, as beautiful and moving as this ceremony is, it’s not legal. +RACHEL: I’m just saying that this happened! +RACHEL: I do the same thing. +RACHEL: Uh, there’s-there’s sales, which is great because you get to travel. +RACHEL: I saw you guys going at it behind the card catalog! +RACHEL: Oh, hi! +RACHEL: That’s why I stopped looking for Russell Crowe. +RACHEL: Don’t say anything. +RACHEL: Well, I'm gonna take a nap, turkey makes me sleepy. +RACHEL: What am I making him by the way? +RACHEL: And this is Ross' sister, Monica. +RACHEL: Gettin’ all dressed up and going to a fancy restaurant. +RACHEL: I'm not feeling really well. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Person! +RACHEL: All right, easy mimey, the moment has passed, it ain’t gonna happen! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: No, I knew. +RACHEL: Phoebe, you had a date three days ago. +RACHEL: What-what about me? +RACHEL: Well, basically, lately, I've uh, I've uh, sort of had feelings for you. +RACHEL: We absolutely can stay married, because I was under the impression that the boxes were far away from each other. +RACHEL: Okay well then, all right, well just have a seat there. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh, I forgot they made sheets! +RACHEL: Hello! +RACHEL: Well, last night you seemed to know your way around the table. +RACHEL: He said he’ll call. +RACHEL: We're all ready for our presentation this afternoon. +RACHEL: I mean, I'll fly back and forth, they'll fly you out. +RACHEL: Huh-huh, no act--no, uhh, that, that is basil. +RACHEL: It’s a pretty cool tux. +RACHEL: She was perfectly lovely! +RACHEL: Pheebs? +RACHEL: Ohh, out, oh God, I don't know why we didn't think to check there! +RACHEL: Whoa oh! +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: I know Monica's worst Thanksgiving. +RACHEL: Uh! +RACHEL: I mean, y'know I'm just gonna have to accept it. +RACHEL: I mean hard is it to get a couple drinks right, huh? +RACHEL: Joey, did you eat my face cream? +RACHEL: What now Ross you’re not gonna talk? +RACHEL: You have to do something knock that door down! +RACHEL: So now what have we agreed? +RACHEL: Hi you guys! +RACHEL: In high school, I was the Prom Queen, and I was the Homecoming Queen, and the class president, and you, were also there. +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: For god sakes, dim the lights. +RACHEL: Okay, y'know what? +RACHEL: Come on you guys, what am I going to do? +RACHEL: Wh. +RACHEL: Now wait a minute that’s not fair. +RACHEL: You must too! +RACHEL: So, how was your date? +RACHEL: Yeah, what? +RACHEL: 'Cause that would give him the control! +RACHEL: Y’know, I work at Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme going on. +RACHEL: What-what-what are you gonna do? +RACHEL: I don't know which one of you guys to pick. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Uh, OK, I mean uh, what, how are you gonna handle it. +RACHEL: Okay, can I ask you a question? +RACHEL: But, you know who’s not great?! +RACHEL: I’m not it’s just not funny anymore! +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: I mean, he's gonna screwed up for a looong time. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I just don’t want him to meet anybody until I am over my crush. +RACHEL: I’ll hire Hilda tomorrow. +RACHEL: My parents happened. +RACHEL: Ohh this is such a mistake. +RACHEL: Okay get your coat! +RACHEL: Oh, well, that shouldn't be so hard, now that you're dating. +RACHEL: This is such a beautiful house. +RACHEL: Talking to Rome. +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: Oh, look at that. +RACHEL: But um. +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: You’re gonna be a poppy! +RACHEL: Well, I mean, sure, of course. +RACHEL: No Phoebe! +RACHEL: So, how are you? +RACHEL: Aaarrggh! +RACHEL: Remember I told you that someone made out with Ralph Lauren in the copy room? +RACHEL: I’ll just copy it later. +RACHEL: You are in such good hands. +RACHEL: Awww. +RACHEL: And there’s marketing. +RACHEL: Ahh, hi! +RACHEL: I have great friends! +RACHEL: You shouldn't. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: How could you set me up with this creep? +RACHEL: Me either. +RACHEL: Good night. +RACHEL: And that’s Phoebe, and that’s Joey. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Or I can bring it down to my side and bring it through my fingers while I talk to him. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: He is! +RACHEL: But then, y’know, I thought well, there’s mincemeat pie, I mean that’s an English dessert, these people just put very strange things in their food, y’know. +RACHEL: You’re gonna get a job, you’re gonna get an apartment, and then I’ll help you and you can stay with us. +RACHEL: Please let us in, so we can have dinner together. +RACHEL: I love you. +RACHEL: It's just a cold. +RACHEL: Come on Ross! +RACHEL: So a bird just grabbed it, and then tried to fly away with it and, and then just dropped it on the street? +RACHEL: No well, no it's not that bad, y'know? +RACHEL: She is so good at throwing drinks in people’s faces, I mean I don’t think I’ve ever seen her finish a beverage. +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: Ahhhohhh. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh-ow! +RACHEL: I promise, I promise, I promise, I won’t do it again. +RACHEL: What is too sensitive? +RACHEL: Well, I guess we have some time to kill. +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Oh my Joey. +RACHEL: I took one of Ross' bags by mistake, and one of mine is missing. +RACHEL: I've gotta, just say what it is I'm gonna say. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Hey, you guys. +RACHEL: When you're sick, you do whatever you can to make yourself feel better! +RACHEL: When Carol was pregnant with Ben. +RACHEL: Ooh, goooosh, ooh, these are cookies smashed in the sports section. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Well, yes, we got married in Vegas and uh, and the names I think. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I love this plan! +RACHEL: You bitch! +RACHEL: You're not gonna end up alone. +RACHEL: Okay, so if you think that I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. +RACHEL: I am not gonna show you this! +RACHEL: All right, let’s go! +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: What does that thing do? +RACHEL: Yeah, we would like some more alcohol, and y'know what else? +RACHEL: I just gotta go back. +RACHEL: We couldn’t stop giggling? +RACHEL: I found it! +RACHEL: Noo! +RACHEL: Oh yeah, what's it about? +RACHEL: Yes, it's, it's hot enough to bake cookies. +RACHEL: Seriously, breathe louder Ross! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: He's smart, he's qualified. +RACHEL: I would—Sequoia? +RACHEL: My grandmother lives in that building. +RACHEL: Oh, hey, Mona! +RACHEL: Ohh. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, I had too. +RACHEL: You don’t know do you? +RACHEL: Well, what is the truth? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: A vacation? +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: Looks like a potato. +RACHEL: Come on Ross, let’s go have sex! +RACHEL: Are you interested at all? +RACHEL: Who else was in this club? +RACHEL: Now there is. +RACHEL: You’ve got three years painting houses. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: She’s cute, she’s outdoorsy, you know, and she knows how to build a fire. +RACHEL: Ok, Barry's letters. +RACHEL: Really, really not. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: I’ve feeling. +RACHEL: Monica, what should I do? +RACHEL: And Joey? +RACHEL: She said gleba! +RACHEL: Oh, come on! +RACHEL: Hey-whoa-whoa-whoa! +RACHEL: Forget it! +RACHEL: Wow, he's cute, Pheebs! +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: I just need you there for support. +RACHEL: Then let me read it. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Ohh, I’m so happy for you! +RACHEL: I gotta get out of here. +RACHEL: I’m gonna have a baby! +RACHEL: Oh I get it! +RACHEL: I’m sorry, one more thing! +RACHEL: Once, I figure out what I'm wearing. +RACHEL: Monica, last Saturday night, what happened on Walker: Texas Ranger? +RACHEL: Oh by the way? +RACHEL: Blew up in his face, didn't it? +RACHEL: Get up! +RACHEL: Oh-ohh, thank you. +RACHEL: I'm glad it's not a problem. +RACHEL: I didn t, I don t come in here a lot. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh wow, you are really, you're really a creep. +RACHEL: Shut up! +RACHEL: And now I'm just sitting here and thinking of all the stuff I should have said, and I didn't. +RACHEL: Yeah, I'm fine. +RACHEL: You love their Kung Pao Chicken! +RACHEL: Remember in high school when I died and didn't give you my baby? +RACHEL: It's actually it's very sweet. +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: I am going to bring this cake back, I don't even want it in my home. +RACHEL: These bargain shoppers are crazy! +RACHEL: My hair’s straight! +RACHEL: I think that's the best news I've heard since Le Poo died! +RACHEL: But Ross doesn't know, so you have to stop screaming! +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Okay, maybe I exchange gifts sometimes, but I keep the things that matter! +RACHEL: Definitely you, Pheebs. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Oh no, I'm good, I don't wanna get that turkey smell all over my hands. +RACHEL: She forced me! +RACHEL: Y'know, I thought it would be fun! +RACHEL: Your honor, rest assured relationship ended like two years ago! +RACHEL: Oh, I just remembered. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I mean, you've been dating this guy since like, what, his midterms? +RACHEL: I don’t know. +RACHEL: Oh, cool. +RACHEL: Pick one. +RACHEL: Joey? +RACHEL: If it’s a girl, Rain. +RACHEL: I’ll take that bet. +RACHEL: Forget it! +RACHEL: Hi, Mr. Treeger. +RACHEL: WHAT? +RACHEL: The earring? +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: No-no-no, that' not Joshua. +RACHEL: How did you do that? +RACHEL: I do not want, this job that bad. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Woo! +RACHEL: You’re jokin’ right? +RACHEL: Well, can't you tell her that you are not in the mood? +RACHEL: Look alive, Judy! +RACHEL: I hate your fear. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Don’t tell him. +RACHEL: All they had to do was sit in the same stadium, smile proudly, and not talk about the divorce. +RACHEL: It's not that bad. +RACHEL: Oh, this one’s for me! +RACHEL: Oh look! +RACHEL: Thanks for coming out of me. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah. +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: So you raised her all on your own? +RACHEL: If you really need to. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: No don’t! +RACHEL: Phoebe, woo! +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Well when I talk to her I almost feel like she understands what I'm saying. +RACHEL: ROSS: Oh, hey, if I make you laugh, here's an idea, why don't you invite Paulo over and have a little romp in the sack and I'l just stand in the corner and tell knock-knock jokes. +RACHEL: Quick question though, what’s this called? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Oh no! +RACHEL: No, I did, but tell me again, because it’s so romantic. +RACHEL: Really, I shouldn't feel guilty? +RACHEL: What is the big deal? +RACHEL: Oh wait, wait-wait, you’re not gonna come with me? +RACHEL: Tag, this is Phoebe. +RACHEL: I mean, for a long time nothing. +RACHEL: One hand on the sheet Joe! +RACHEL: God! +RACHEL: That is not true. +RACHEL: I know that! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Um…But—Okay, yes Ross and I used to date. +RACHEL: Oh, Ross, relax. +RACHEL: Ooh, I like those sunglasses. +RACHEL: Ok number 29, have you ever betrayed another goddess for a lightning bearer? +RACHEL: Oh, but y’know, no, you didn’t give me your phone number. +RACHEL: Well, you have been in our lives for nearly two months now and we don't really know you. +RACHEL: Is Monica here? +RACHEL: Oh, good. +RACHEL: If it comes up again, we’ll just…smile. +RACHEL: Can we just close the door? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: No-no, it’s really not huge. +RACHEL: But God, I didn’t know that I was gonna unleash this-this weepy, clingy, moist monster! +RACHEL: That is great. +RACHEL: No, forget it. +RACHEL: Oh honey, this is for the best, this way I'm not distracted, worrying about Emma, how she's doing at home and I'm being completely here with you and, oh, she spit up! +RACHEL: Thank God. +RACHEL: I bet that’s him. +RACHEL: I mean, this is what I’m talking about! +RACHEL: Oh now daddy, stay calm. +RACHEL: That mail guy had no idea there was something going on between us. +RACHEL: It-it did! +RACHEL: We meet, you flirted and then bamn nine years later you had me! +RACHEL: It’s okay. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: All right, so are we not having dinner at all? +RACHEL: And while I’m gone don’t you boys sneak a taste. +RACHEL: Oh, uh, Joanna I was wondering if I could ask you something. +RACHEL: Ross is sooo great! +RACHEL: With Danny. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Ahh. +RACHEL: Why is that bagel on the floor? +RACHEL: Sssshhhh! +RACHEL: That’s a lot to remember, can’t I just tell her you’re a pig? +RACHEL: I think I'm gonna have the chicken. +RACHEL: Thank you Phoebe. +RACHEL: Oh, screw you guys, you don’t have to do it! +RACHEL: This is my one chance for him to see the fun Rachel. +RACHEL: I really do feel like tomorrow’s the day. +RACHEL: Oh, the guys are here. +RACHEL: if you don't get that. +RACHEL: I didn’t ask you to do it! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Well, uh. +RACHEL: Oh Ross, would you stop, you got me, I'm dating you. +RACHEL: I’ve got a lot of those too! +RACHEL: Are you crazy? +RACHEL: Man, this does not get old. +RACHEL: I don't know what to do, this is totally unprecedented. +RACHEL: That’s it? +RACHEL: Ross, she’s gonna start getting ready soon! +RACHEL: There I am. +RACHEL: Oh daddy, I hope you’re okay with all of this. +RACHEL: Thanks. +RACHEL: What's new in sex? +RACHEL: Enjoy. +RACHEL: There's something about me on that piece of paper and I want to see it. +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: God how long do you think that’s gonna last? +RACHEL: It's coming from Joey! +RACHEL: Yeah, sure, okay. +RACHEL: Mon. +RACHEL: Oh, thank you that's very helpful, I'm glad you came over. +RACHEL: Hey, where've you been? +RACHEL: Well, come on, Steve let's not rule out nervous laughter. +RACHEL: Ok. What's up? +RACHEL: That doesn't mean please climb up the fire escape. +RACHEL: No, it's not better. +RACHEL: Chandler, what are you doing? +RACHEL: I’ll remember to put that in your evaluation. +RACHEL: Hey-hey, you guys oh hurry up, get some, there's a whole cart outside. +RACHEL: I don’t know how I feel. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I'm fantastic. +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: Good. +RACHEL: Wherever I go. +RACHEL: I feel blue. +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Like, a regular pen. +RACHEL: What do you want? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Fine! +RACHEL: What was that?! +RACHEL: I don’t know, I don’t know. +RACHEL: Probably not in the same way, but I do. +RACHEL: Is that my new nickname? +RACHEL: He's just being silly. +RACHEL: Afraid to ask him? +RACHEL: I KNOW! +RACHEL: Oh, Pheebs, baby, that's nice but, you know what, I think I'm ok. Why don't you give it to one of your other single girlfriends? +RACHEL: He was trying to cheer me up! +RACHEL: Monica does not know what she’s talking about! +RACHEL: The first one is: I don't want to. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Is Monica around? +RACHEL: And-and ohh God this is funny, look, this is a picture of one Halloween where she dressed up as a bride. +RACHEL: Umm, maybe you can start with, Chandler, even though we were friends there was a part of me that always knew I wanted more. +RACHEL: Ah, a little preview! +RACHEL: I think he's across the hall. +RACHEL: She has got so much going on we-we have only two options. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: What do I do now? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: The baby’s coming and I don’t know what to do. +RACHEL: I love you. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Okay Rachel! +RACHEL: I mean, come on go on, you were, you were saying I am happier when uh, y’know? +RACHEL: Ross, you stay here and talk, I’m gonna go have a baby. +RACHEL: Yeah well, Ross just made plans for the whole century. +RACHEL: Ha-ha-ha beat ya! +RACHEL: Oh my God, honey that's great. +RACHEL: We, we asked for a private room. +RACHEL: Stop forcing that thing on her. +RACHEL: Well, you sure had a hell of a time at the wake! +RACHEL: Well, there you go. +RACHEL: I got half a mind to contract that doctor’s uterus though. +RACHEL: You were actually gonna. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Not working with me, Joe! +RACHEL: So if you think I didn't say goodbye to you because you don't mean as much to me as everybody else, you're wrong. +RACHEL: And, uh, by the way. +RACHEL: It’s moving. +RACHEL: Aah. +RACHEL: Wha!? +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: I'm just serving it. +RACHEL: I'm sorry, all right. +RACHEL: Ohh, here you are. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: This headhunter called me. +RACHEL: Look, there's Joey's picture! +RACHEL: You think of it as your apartment, and I'm just somebody who rents a room. +RACHEL: Yeah-eah-ha! +RACHEL: Kinda in the middle of a story here! +RACHEL: Okay, that doesn't help me, because we went to the same high school. +RACHEL: Maybe that's all we do, what about Julie? +RACHEL: And then it’s only because they get paid 100 an hour! +RACHEL: Well you’re not gonna be able to keep doing this. +RACHEL: We should just switch. +RACHEL: Ohhhh, look at that. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I don’t wanna speak, I don’t wanna think. +RACHEL: A letter from my mom. +RACHEL: Can't wait! +RACHEL: Monica's making jam. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Okay, well you are just gonna have too, okay. +RACHEL: Oh, thank God. +RACHEL: God! +RACHEL: Monica, can Phoebe borrow your green dress? +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Hi Tag! +RACHEL: Because if there's a window open, a bird could fly in there. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Of the movies, you know. +RACHEL: Oh, honey that's awful. +RACHEL: But Ross doesn't know so you have to stop screaming! +RACHEL: Honey wait, Joey, I’m sorry I mean as terrific as I think you are with it. +RACHEL: I know, but I was just thinking about how huge this is for me. +RACHEL: I'm an assistant buyer! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: The job is in Paris. +RACHEL: How are you gonna feel when you win the lottery and you lose all your friends? +RACHEL: Ya do? +RACHEL: No Paul, I don’t know anything about you! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Can I ask you a question? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: What's up Joey? +RACHEL: You. +RACHEL: II don't. +RACHEL: Oh good. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: In Human Resources! +RACHEL: Well, well um, you know, these movies are offensive and uh, degrading to women and females. +RACHEL: And you know, we said that we would, we would live together as long as this makes sense. +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: All right, it won't come off! +RACHEL: I'm going commando, too. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh, y’know I'm not that much of a sweet tooth. +RACHEL: Oh no no no no no, Gavin can't, he already has plans, most likely with his mother. +RACHEL: Woah, woah, woah, what book is this? +RACHEL: Oh, great. +RACHEL: Hi, Joshua. +RACHEL: I don't know, his uh, his hair never really bothered me that much, Okay. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Monica is Ross' sister. +RACHEL: Well, there you go! +RACHEL: Mark? +RACHEL: Now that since you know, when you come over would you mind actually using it? +RACHEL: All right, believe me. +RACHEL: I found him! +RACHEL: Okay-okay look—no I did, I just wanted this stuff and I know how you feel about Pottery Barn. +RACHEL: Look Daddy, it's my life. +RACHEL: See, I'd never make a list. +RACHEL: Yeah, maybe if you’re in love. +RACHEL: Oh, Phoebe, do I wanna hear this? +RACHEL: And watch out for your hair, 'cause she likes to grab it. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I'm gonna fix you a drink, huh? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: It doesn’t just make it better. +RACHEL: Okay, y'know what uh, actually, that's great. +RACHEL: Yes I can! +RACHEL: I - I have to get on the plane. +RACHEL: You know that! +RACHEL: Well okay, how about four hours in a freezing museum auditorium listening to Professor Pitstains and he's 'Hey everybody! +RACHEL: Kate Miller? +RACHEL: Huh ha ha! +RACHEL: For the last time, I don’t care what the computer says, we did not take a bag of Mashuga nuts from the mini-bar and we did not watch Dr. DoMeALittle! +RACHEL: Just a minute! +RACHEL: I'm uh Rachel Green. +RACHEL: I got a spider. +RACHEL: And if you really like this girl, I don't flirting is the right thing to. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Hello Gavin. +RACHEL: Oh Joey! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Honey, stop it! +RACHEL: You sure? +RACHEL: Oh Ross! +RACHEL: Oh, no! +RACHEL: Veto. +RACHEL: They’re just so happy that I’m not suing them that they gave me one extra month paid maternity leave. +RACHEL: Ah, what is this? +RACHEL: Thief. +RACHEL: Well, we were paying for our stuff and this saleswoman just started flirting with him. +RACHEL: Ross, listen can you come to a charity event tonight? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: She'll be out in a second. +RACHEL: Well that works out good, because I'm not listening. +RACHEL: I think I'm gonna take off. +RACHEL: Or the Big Mac. +RACHEL: Well, Ross said my name. +RACHEL: It's okay. +RACHEL: Dayton or Sandrine? +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Yeah, it was senior year in college. +RACHEL: Well, I mean, are you sure you want to go out with her? +RACHEL: I need some milk. +RACHEL: In fact, from now on, I'm going take the high road. +RACHEL: So just fix whatever she wants fixed. +RACHEL: All right, you take care of that. +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: It’s got all of these layers. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Tag. +RACHEL: Hey guys! +RACHEL: Yeah, Phoebe you re awful! +RACHEL: Okay, y'know what? +RACHEL: She’s totally right! +RACHEL: Pheebs, this guy has been obsessed with your sister, for God knows how long, okay, you don't just give up something like that. +RACHEL: During that second time you couldn't have picked. +RACHEL: She’s actually very sweet and we used to be very close. +RACHEL: Oh, thank you. +RACHEL: You had a club?! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: So, you ever get a pet with a girlfriend? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: I’ll work on it. +RACHEL: That’s funny. +RACHEL: Well they have uh, some unusual pet names for each other. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Hey is that a door? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I’m gonna write Joey on one napkin and I’m gonna right Ross on the other napkin and we are going to pick one! +RACHEL: I’m not helping. +RACHEL: Yeah, y'know, Pheebs I just wanted to have fun. +RACHEL: Off to see young Ethan? +RACHEL: Oh my god. +RACHEL: Ha! +RACHEL: It's-it's so pretty! +RACHEL: Ok. Wha? +RACHEL: Who? +RACHEL: Chandler's on the couch! +RACHEL: Look at that! +RACHEL: And now, y'know, I'm like. +RACHEL: I have an extra ticket. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: That's what I said! +RACHEL: I don't think he's the one who needs help. +RACHEL: I can not believe that! +RACHEL: Yeah, I can do that. +RACHEL: All right, who’s turn is it to help me get up! +RACHEL: But I already told Zelner that I would come back. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I normally wait until my date leaves, but you live here. +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: You’ve being seeing someone? +RACHEL: Okay, III know, I know I didn't love him. +RACHEL: Because I lose her stuff! +RACHEL: But today, it's like there's rock bottom, then 50 feet of crap, then me. +RACHEL: Ooh! +RACHEL: I said don't go! +RACHEL: Oh no! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh yeah, she was sweet. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hey, hi! +RACHEL: Well you’re just the prettiest ballerina I’ve ever seen. +RACHEL: A mistake?! +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Why didn’t I get that message? +RACHEL: The guys don’t know yet do they? +RACHEL: Good-good, don’t tell him. +RACHEL: I’m sorry! +RACHEL: Oh, I can't watch this. +RACHEL: No way, forget it. +RACHEL: I don't even know how I would go about it. +RACHEL: Ok go get the sandwich, get the sandwich doggie. +RACHEL: Right, well, we never actually got to that. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: What are they? +RACHEL: Honey, this is really an incredible thing to do for them but there are things to think about. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Or Joey? +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: Thanks. +RACHEL: Congratulatioooons! +RACHEL: You said bye to me. +RACHEL: But whatever. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Look-look-look! +RACHEL: Yeah, that was a real good one. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Monica, you should totally put your name down on the list. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: All right, Julie. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Ummm, I think it’s time to see the ring again. +RACHEL: Yeah, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Why have I never tasted these before? +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: Yes your honor, and here are, are forms, all filled out. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: He just keeps lobbing them up and I just keep knocking them right out of the park! +RACHEL: No-no they do but, you just have to wait. +RACHEL: Well neither do I! +RACHEL: We can’t do this by Friday! +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: Okay, thank you. +RACHEL: Did I say I was done guessing? +RACHEL: I even used all the attachments on the vacuum, except that little round one with the bristles, I don't know what that's for. +RACHEL: Or a or a hat! +RACHEL: So, Joey, what are you gonna do for us? +RACHEL: Ok, so anyway, you were telling me about Paris, it sounds fascinating. +RACHEL: Love to love ya baby! +RACHEL: Just give us our apartment back! +RACHEL: Okay-okay-okay! +RACHEL: It’s not working. +RACHEL: That’s gotta be like this! +RACHEL: An maybe this, you know, Hi. +RACHEL: You're a guy very much in love. +RACHEL: Sure! +RACHEL: Oh God—Ow!—Oo! +RACHEL: Okay, never mind! +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: I loved the moment when you first saw the giant dog shadow all over the park. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I think opening the presents right now is a little overwhelming right now. +RACHEL: We have two days to plan this party. +RACHEL: Uhh, no, no, it bothered me when he slept with other women. +RACHEL: My God, I’m sorry! +RACHEL: You put these on my desk! +RACHEL: I’m gonna miss you so much! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Ooh, do I sense a little bit of resentment? +RACHEL: Just work the bra, Joe! +RACHEL: Look at my favorite blue sweater. +RACHEL: It’s good! +RACHEL: Ok. Emma just said gleba! +RACHEL: Come on you guys. +RACHEL: That can’t be right. +RACHEL: Oh look see, now there's Raven. +RACHEL: Whatever Linus, I’m opening mine. +RACHEL: Well, believe me, it's been a long time since I've been flung. +RACHEL: IF you hold a spider. +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: You want me, you want me to quit me job so you can feel like you have a girlfriend? +RACHEL: No, there's a party. +RACHEL: Y'know? +RACHEL: Walked right into that one didn't he? +RACHEL: I know you. +RACHEL: How’d it go with Pete?! +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh come on, what are you talking about? +RACHEL: Really Joey? +RACHEL: Carlos. +RACHEL: Amy! +RACHEL: He thought it would be funny. +RACHEL: That was the fire department, there was a fire at our place! +RACHEL: If you don’t want to believe me about this, why don’t you just come with me to dinner tonight and she will tell you. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I have an idea. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Now the filet mignon, what comes with that? +RACHEL: Oh please, do not tell Ross. +RACHEL: Beef. +RACHEL: Yeah, that's probably a good idea. +RACHEL: Uh, well, I think, I think he broke up with me. +RACHEL: I found it! +RACHEL: I know you did. +RACHEL: Phoebe hates Pottery Barn?! +RACHEL: I mean, you're married. +RACHEL: Okay, even this is turning me on! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You see, you look beautiful. +RACHEL: Okay, now that is the third time someone has said something like that to me today. +RACHEL: He-he likes your hair, he just wants to know how you got here. +RACHEL: Amy! +RACHEL: Guys, this is Russ. +RACHEL: Well, we're not here to meet guys. +RACHEL: I'm really sorry. +RACHEL: And that was so sweet of you to ask! +RACHEL: Oh hell, he’s done this three times! +RACHEL: Bob buttons? +RACHEL: The fear? +RACHEL: Joey, I have to go. +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: It does! +RACHEL: Okay honey, now I'm gonna try to listen from right here! +RACHEL: No, no, no, wait! +RACHEL: Well, clearly this is not a good time. +RACHEL: Oops, sorry. +RACHEL: Umm, so you like it? +RACHEL: Like when I-moved-toNewYork scared. +RACHEL: OK, here we go. +RACHEL: Uh, no. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh, really, really good. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh my god, this is the worst date ever! +RACHEL: You had no right coming down to my office Ross. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Umm, you uh, you take a quarter, take a quarter and, and you blacken the edge. +RACHEL: Marcel! +RACHEL: Last night, I had a dream that, uh, you and I, were. +RACHEL: That’s pretty bad what you did. +RACHEL: Oh honey, this is his office too. +RACHEL: Oh I don’tI don’t know. +RACHEL: Not, I mean. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh, I'm glad. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Excuse me. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Wow, you know what? +RACHEL: Ok ya know, that sounded soooo much better in my head. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Exactly. +RACHEL: II am early! +RACHEL: And then you say to person, I bet you can’t roll this quarter from your forehead to your chin without it leaving your face. +RACHEL: I can’t believe you lied to me. +RACHEL: Well, y'know that's actually a really good idea, because that way they'll be closer to the mugs. +RACHEL: No, we're not okay, we're not okay, there's a bump, there's a bump. +RACHEL: And hey! +RACHEL: Okay, good night! +RACHEL: Ohh, I forgot to dial! +RACHEL: Okay, I've had it for five years, and I know how it works, so why don't you just catch me up! +RACHEL: Oh no, you're the best. +RACHEL: I wouldn't of even hired me. +RACHEL: Ralph Lauren walked into my office! +RACHEL: I can't believe it! +RACHEL: Monica, would you calm down? +RACHEL: OK, you wanna play? +RACHEL: I already feel like I know you a little better! +RACHEL: Great. +RACHEL: Oh, that's why you got these tickets to that play, to get rid of us? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: So, Spin the Bottle works like this: I spin the bottle, it lands on Gunther, so I would have to kiss Gunther. +RACHEL: Uh-huh! +RACHEL: Monica, where did you get these?! +RACHEL: Well, the first time didn't really count. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: I'm done. +RACHEL: pig pig man! +RACHEL: YES! +RACHEL: Oh, okay, just hide! +RACHEL: You guys would never want to go to a lecture with me. +RACHEL: How do you know? +RACHEL: So did I. +RACHEL: Well maybe it’s just the idea of Barry for the rest of my life. +RACHEL: Yeah I know, but one of them just said that she loved me so I just gave her everything. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Mrs. Lynch, I know that this is an emotional and difficult time, for all of us. +RACHEL: Hardy Boy. +RACHEL: Just have him call me okay? +RACHEL: Then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef sautéed with peas and onions, then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top! +RACHEL: With my sister Jill and my ex-boyfriend Ross? +RACHEL: He's at the game isn't he? +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: You wanted me to take them down, so I'm takin' 'em down. +RACHEL: It's okay! +RACHEL: Me too. +RACHEL: Woo hoo! +RACHEL: Just so you know, it’s not that common! +RACHEL: Okay, you go! +RACHEL: Oh, you've got Carol tomorrow. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Okay, but Monica, what if what if it doesn't come together? +RACHEL: O-o-o-okay, how did it go? +RACHEL: I'm supposed to be at a regatta gala. +RACHEL: Well, should we just continue to live together and not really tell each other how we're really feeling? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: No, no-no, it’s okay, calm down. +RACHEL: Oh, please, Ross it was so obvious! +RACHEL: Like you haven’t done enough. +RACHEL: Ok, Pheebs, you know what, if we had that, we wouldn't be doing the ritual in the first place. +RACHEL: Put that box down! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: That is the last time Emma is getting on one of those things for her entire life. +RACHEL: Oh you guys thanks for doing this. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: All of my life, everyone has always told me, 'You're a shoe! +RACHEL: Of course, I mean, she's gonna get over this, y'know? +RACHEL: Yes I did! +RACHEL: Okay, uhh, I think I’m going to run to the ladies room. +RACHEL: After what just happened, I'm never leaving her again. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: I got the job! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I love you, I love you so much. +RACHEL: Oh, sorry. +RACHEL: He's right there! +RACHEL: with, with Russian dressing, and pickles on the side. +RACHEL: But y’know, favorite returning character is a tough category Joey. +RACHEL: The burping clogs? +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: OK. Alright, alright. +RACHEL: Well first, for forgetting to throw you a bridal shower. +RACHEL: Okay umm, Ross? +RACHEL: Do you guys ever get the feeling that um, Chandler and those guys just don't get that we don't make as much money as they do? +RACHEL: You give me back my Walkman! +RACHEL: You know what honey, you go ahead, we'll call her an alternate. +RACHEL: A lot. +RACHEL: Wait a minute. +RACHEL: Well? +RACHEL: Ohh, I'm gonna miss that big old squishy butt. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Got a little crush on Tag there do ya? +RACHEL: This one's Paolo's. +RACHEL: I’ll take all of your photos and put them into photo albums! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh stupid metric system! +RACHEL: Wait, we won't know that until we do it, will we? +RACHEL: Closure, that's what it is. +RACHEL: Our first date. +RACHEL: Noo, I y'know I don't see why she has to play with you, that's all. +RACHEL: Third one from the left? +RACHEL: So I'll bring her by around seven? +RACHEL: Ooooh yeah. +RACHEL: I'm ok. +RACHEL: Well, screw charity work. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: But, when we were in high school I made out with James Farrell even when I knew that you liked him! +RACHEL: Joshua! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Here you go Officer uh, Handsome. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Like your mom. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I mean you needed to get out on your own anyway! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Well is it fair that all you did was put on a cape and I gotta give you free stuff? +RACHEL: Summer catalogue! +RACHEL: Good ones? +RACHEL: You can never be too Alan. +RACHEL: An. +RACHEL: What are you? +RACHEL: H-umm! +RACHEL: Bye! +RACHEL: I can't do this right now, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Monica, is this true? +RACHEL: Yeah, I'm with Mon. +RACHEL: Right? +RACHEL: Oh, poor Pheebs. +RACHEL: Or should I say Mrs. Monica Becker? +RACHEL: Wow, that feels so good to get off my chest! +RACHEL: Yeah, you do. +RACHEL: No that’s just——That’s just ‘cause I’m such a good messer! +RACHEL: I had this friend from college and I made the stupid mistake of telling Joey that one time…she and I y’know…kissed a little bit. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Well, we were walking down the street and we saw that van that you guys used for catering and we realised. +RACHEL: Yeah, we wanted to throw you a big surprise and a great shower, and now you don’t have either. +RACHEL: You heard that?! +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: I just, I feel, II just. +RACHEL: Oh, sit down, sit down. +RACHEL: The left one. +RACHEL: marenge, thank you honey, and do the cha-cha. +RACHEL: Look Benny, spoon. +RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: I mean not for me because i'm only pretending to hold this, but for these guys. +RACHEL: What happened? +RACHEL: What are you doing here! +RACHEL: Hey Joey! +RACHEL: Go. +RACHEL: All right let me see. +RACHEL: You should find out what his hobbies are and then use that to bond with him. +RACHEL: No luck huh? +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Oh b-b-but it is! +RACHEL: I mean it's my fault. +RACHEL: Oooohh that's interesting. +RACHEL: Oh no, those were four great dates. +RACHEL: What thing? +RACHEL: In the future, when a girl asks for some ill-advised sympathy sex, just do it. +RACHEL: Because I was giving a. +RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok. How did this happen to me? +RACHEL: You got it. +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: Oh, hi Mr. Zelner. +RACHEL: How, how? +RACHEL: Oh, okay. +RACHEL: God! +RACHEL: It's like inviting Greek tragedy over for dinner! +RACHEL: What's going on? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: You know what I mean? +RACHEL: I thought she was on Atkins. +RACHEL: I'llI'll have toast! +RACHEL: We had this idea to make a birthday video for Emma and we'll give it to her when she is 18. +RACHEL: All right, I promise. +RACHEL: Speaking of hot, watching you do that really makes me want to have sex with you. +RACHEL: Okay, well, we brought you some wine. +RACHEL: Frat bros! +RACHEL: Well, it was a little extravagant, but I a pretty good deal. +RACHEL: See, there's always one guy. +RACHEL: And I will make everyone call me Mrs. Geller! +RACHEL: What happened? +RACHEL: Well,sounds like you two have issues. +RACHEL: Oh, I would love to! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: All right, fine. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Alimony. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oops, sorry. +RACHEL: I work Monday nights. +RACHEL: Take her dancing! +RACHEL: Now, I know. +RACHEL: Oh no, no-no-no, that's not, not, not, what he is doing. +RACHEL: Okay please, you’re kidding right?! +RACHEL: I mean they’re probably not even listening! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I thought it was Chandler. +RACHEL: Who's there? +RACHEL: Hey you guys, this is my sister Amy. +RACHEL: I just don't want to be alone tonight. +RACHEL: Is Joey Tribbiani here? +RACHEL: But I have to tell him how I. Ohh, Do you think he will?! +RACHEL: Hey what's going on? +RACHEL: Hold on, I'll be just clean up in here a little bit! +RACHEL: You bought boobs? +RACHEL: Look at this place! +RACHEL: I knew that! +RACHEL: Seriously! +RACHEL: He has a naked picture of Monica! +RACHEL: Yeah, we’re, we’re actually just gonna walk ‘cause it’s right up there at the Angelica. +RACHEL: Ooh, I was kinda hoping that wouldn't be an issue. +RACHEL: I mean, nobody else has a chance! +RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok, I will, I will, I, hey, I will clean the apartment for two months. +RACHEL: No, no, I mean, no, c'mon you guys, I mean, c'mon look it's only eleven thirty. +RACHEL: Really it’s nothing. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: I actually made a few changes, but I think I'm caught up on everything. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: This was such a huge mistake. +RACHEL: Honey, we have to go. +RACHEL: So hi! +RACHEL: Nevermind, I’m gonna be fine. +RACHEL: yeah. +RACHEL: The best thing to do to get over a guy is to start dating someone else. +RACHEL: Did you just pull that out of her purse? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Yes, Joanna really has been an incredible mentor to me. +RACHEL: Well. +RACHEL: He carries a briefcase. +RACHEL: I mean I’m standing there with this charming, cute guy, who’s asking me to go out with him, which I’m allowed to do, and I felt guilty. +RACHEL: Well, y'know, possibly. +RACHEL: Wait a minute, unless you’re thinking about Naked Wednesday’s. +RACHEL: He's goin' to get my coat. +RACHEL: I haven’t seen it yet! +RACHEL: Because, I can't! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Uhh, we still need a tip. +RACHEL: Um-hmm. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: This one is uh Paul O’Neil. +RACHEL: Well, I have been spending a lot of time in the lab. +RACHEL: Gunther, I want you to give Joey his job back. +RACHEL: What are we all doing in here? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Ok actually Mon, Matthew was just giving me his phone number. +RACHEL: Let’s say I had slept with Mark. +RACHEL: When we left, you said, got the keys. +RACHEL: Aw, I love that. +RACHEL: Is my misery amusing to you? +RACHEL: We will be there for you the whole time! +RACHEL: She gets the house, he's in some condo my sister's gonna decorate with wicker. +RACHEL: You will totally keep it in check this time, and plus y’know the publicity would be really good for your career! +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: When did it get so complicated? +RACHEL: Ross. +RACHEL: And you’re the father by the way—but you got that… Can I get you some water? +RACHEL: Listen, ok, and maybe they're crazy thoughts, but sometimes I do, I have, I've been thinking about, you know, us! +RACHEL: Up! +RACHEL: It should be right next to my plane ticket. +RACHEL: Hi you guys! +RACHEL: Where did you get that? +RACHEL: I don’t want to say. +RACHEL: You remembered to put clothes on this morning. +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: owwwww. +RACHEL: I meant Chandler. +RACHEL: Look, you guys, this is really, really important to me. +RACHEL: I'm out a thousand dollars, I'm all scratched up, and I'm stuck with this stupid cat that looks like a hand! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: You got us evicted! +RACHEL: And y'know what else, oh my God, are they gonna love you. +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Oh, I know. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Y'know what else is really great about him, oh, what is the word for the adult that doesn't have dinosaur toys in their bedroom? +RACHEL: ROSS! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Chandler, please, I have to get you locked up back the way you were, I am sooo gonna lose my job, she’s very private about her office. +RACHEL: And-and if I feel a little hot, I can just dab myself with it. +RACHEL: Chandler, you have an assistant right? +RACHEL: What the hell's a Rachem? +RACHEL: Give me that phone! +RACHEL: We love you, we're here for you. +RACHEL: Okay, I need a, I need a drink! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: And you're no friend to those with noses. +RACHEL: Go on. +RACHEL: This is it! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: What has happened to the sanctity of marriage? +RACHEL: Well, then, you know, couldn't she have just copied my haircut? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: He said bye. +RACHEL: I already fed her. +RACHEL: Mom, c'mon, stop worrying. +RACHEL: Umm, they didn’t have poppy seed bagels, so I Oh my word! +RACHEL: Phoebe look, it’s Ross and that girl. +RACHEL: So did I. I'm really glad Monica asked us out. +RACHEL: Alright, alright look, just uh, just try to remember how you felt when you were in love, and think about that when you're playing the scene. +RACHEL: Umm, our situation. +RACHEL: You just organized their game schedules on your Commodore 64. +RACHEL: My sister's graduating from college, nobody thought she would. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: That would be great! +RACHEL: Pheebs, this whole apartment thing is just a nightmare! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Now, I would like to make a toast, to the future Mrs. Chandler Bing, my best friend, and truly one of the nicest people that. +RACHEL: It’s not like it’s Citizen Kane! +RACHEL: You-you do this kind of stuff! +RACHEL: She was a cat?! +RACHEL: And it is a big deal! +RACHEL: Well, if you see him, will you please tell him that I’m looking for him and that this I am not gonna throw up! +RACHEL: Umm, I gotta go to the store I told him that I would buy him some more tissues. +RACHEL: Oh okay, hey guys, would you flip mine too? +RACHEL: Hey, you. +RACHEL: Who's Gladys? +RACHEL: Oh Joey honey I don’t…I don’t want to lose. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Because you are my sister and Ross and I have this huge history. +RACHEL: Hu-ahh, waitressing? +RACHEL: So ask me anything! +RACHEL: I, um. +RACHEL: Okay, see now, what I just heard: blah-blah-blah, blah-blah-blah-blah-blah, blah-blah-blah, blah, blah. +RACHEL: Joey, why would you do that? +RACHEL: The thing is y'know, that you're married to Emily. +RACHEL: But I. +RACHEL: Is that it? +RACHEL: It’s Saturday! +RACHEL: Well, listen, why don't you two sit down, and we'll get you some glasses. +RACHEL: Shh! +RACHEL: What if he thinks I'm the kind of girl that-that would just sleep with him? +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: This is ridiculous! +RACHEL: When?! +RACHEL: Ohh, I just don't think I have enough. +RACHEL: I didn't have to, because I was wearing my 'I heart Ross' sandwich board and ringing my bell. +RACHEL: Oh so you know that, you guys talked about that, so you get along, so you think you’re gonna go out? +RACHEL: That’s funny, yeah! +RACHEL: Small. +RACHEL: Oh wait! +RACHEL: See now, tonight, all I really wanted was to make it though this evening with a little bit of grace and dignity. +RACHEL: Yeah, what, so, you had feelings for me first. +RACHEL: I mean he just started going out with her. +RACHEL: So you’ll definitely get onstage, even if you don’t win. +RACHEL: No, really. +RACHEL: Well, y’know I was thinking of moving the couch over here. +RACHEL: Oh, it’s a joke! +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: It's. +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: It sure is. +RACHEL: Like the days of yore. +RACHEL: Is Ross here? +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: Well you could’ve untied it with your hands. +RACHEL: The only reason I did that was because your party was so boring! +RACHEL: Chandler, I’m not gonna lie to ya, but I am gonna run away from you. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Okay, I'll see you back at home, if I ever get a flight out of here. +RACHEL: That’s not her name! +RACHEL: Did I just share too much? +RACHEL: Damn it! +RACHEL: I don't know, I'm not trying to do anything, it's just, we have such a good time when we're together, you know. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Please? +RACHEL: ROSS: Animal sex, animal sex? +RACHEL: That was not a near death experience! +RACHEL: Okay, there you go. +RACHEL: Why not? +RACHEL: I mean yeah, my tongue feels a little fuzzy and these fingers sort of smell, I actually feel like I can throw up. +RACHEL: I’m not telling you what to do! +RACHEL: It’s just, there is nothing! +RACHEL: No-no, but I support it. +RACHEL: Oh, hi! +RACHEL: She’s just gonna think that we’re doin’ it. +RACHEL: Yes of course, absolutely! +RACHEL: Ah, hah-hah-hah-ho, yeah, he wishes. +RACHEL: That actually, uh, that sounds interesting. +RACHEL: And what's the big deal, people do it all the time! +RACHEL: This is the first time in my life I’m doing something that I’m actually good at. +RACHEL: I think I would actually consider naming our child that. +RACHEL: It was cheesecake. +RACHEL: Hey, do you guys know what you're doing for New Year's? +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: Ask me what? +RACHEL: Did ya just change your mind?! +RACHEL: Ross, I have been walking around like this since the plane! +RACHEL: Oh wow. +RACHEL: Y’know ‘cause the whole not being ready and kinda the financial aspects, all that. +RACHEL: Well that sounds fun too. +RACHEL: Oh wow this is so beautiful. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: The rest of you life, y’know? +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Fasten your seatbelts. +RACHEL: Hey you! +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: I hope you’re going somewhere with this. +RACHEL: You don't even have cats. +RACHEL: I'm all better now. +RACHEL: No, no, no. +RACHEL: Except not no. +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: And then with her one good hand, she slo-o-owly re-e-a-aches up and turns your doorknob. +RACHEL: Okay please tell me that this is just one of your jokes that you do that I don’t get. +RACHEL: That s not true! +RACHEL: Uh-oh. +RACHEL: So I gave him my phone number and he's gonna call me this weekend to see if he can get me an interview! +RACHEL: Oh, well, that's, that's mighty big of you, Ross. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Hey, can I borrow the key to your house so I can run across the street and make a copy? +RACHEL: But wait you said everything was gonna be okay. +RACHEL: I mean, that place must have been falling apart without me. +RACHEL: I believe that there is one perfect person out there for everyone. +RACHEL: A little young for you Tag, but whatever. +RACHEL: Aww Pheebs, that sucks! +RACHEL: Oh you went to the movies by yourself? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I can’t believe I never knew that! +RACHEL: Ok. Monica? +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: But you love packing! +RACHEL: Okay fine, I did. +RACHEL: Good luck to ya! +RACHEL: I do love you. +RACHEL: Bye guys. +RACHEL: So can you just make it quick? +RACHEL: Cah. +RACHEL: You know what, we just say that she said it was 5 o'clock. +RACHEL: Alright, I feel that this is totally unjustified. +RACHEL: Ooh! +RACHEL: We’ve forgotten who he is. +RACHEL: Just. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I meant young, young, I meant young, young to be a doctor. +RACHEL: Yes it is! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: So, he's going out with her. +RACHEL: Is it-does it not taste good? +RACHEL: I know, I know, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Sandy is just sensitive, that's all. +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Ross, I. +RACHEL: All right, so what do you want to do now? +RACHEL: Why did you invite my mother?! +RACHEL: These pins aren’t for playing are they? +RACHEL: I lied! +RACHEL: I brought reinforcements. +RACHEL: Oh wait, I forgot to turn off the cappucino machine. +RACHEL: Hi Monica! +RACHEL: Oh, oh, I love that Japanese place. +RACHEL: I’ll keep the mug. +RACHEL: None of the amazing things that have happened to me in the last ten years, would have happened if it wasn't for you. +RACHEL: Yeah, everything’s fine! +RACHEL: Chandler gets it! +RACHEL: Phoebe's Mike? +RACHEL: Oh but Joey, I have to go. +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Well it’s mine too! +RACHEL: You are not. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: God, he's good. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Oh come on, what am I gonna do, its been hours and it won’t stop crying. +RACHEL: Thanks to somebody's dumb-ass rooster. +RACHEL: You're sister's asleep on the couch? +RACHEL: So? +RACHEL: It's fine. +RACHEL: Help me! +RACHEL: All right Joey! +RACHEL: It's open! +RACHEL: I mean I’m about to have a baby, I can tell my mother that I don’t want her to just be sleeping on my couch! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Thank you very much, but I do not need you to get me a date! +RACHEL: Aren’t you scared? +RACHEL: Oh no, I can't tell you until you tell me what you know. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh, I am, my side still hurts from when you crashed into me yesterday. +RACHEL: I feel so free and so graceful. +RACHEL: And Mom, I realize you and Daddy were upset when I didn't marry Barry and get the big house in the suburbs with all the security and everything, but this is just so much better for me, you know? +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Stick it in the ice bucket, the phone is off the hook, and in the interest of powering through. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: But it's uh, actually umm my friend Ross. +RACHEL: Great advice on that Joey thing! +RACHEL: Eight? +RACHEL: Oh, what an interesting name. +RACHEL: He turns into such a baby when he starts to lose. +RACHEL: Let’s see, there’s design, but you may need a whole other degree for that. +RACHEL: Yes, I’ve done my studying and I really know my stuff. +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Oh, I remember how we almost. +RACHEL: Whoops! +RACHEL: She was in there, when I was in there?! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I think my water just broke. +RACHEL: Whatever! +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Hey, what's-what's going on?! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: It's so not a big deal! +RACHEL: Okay so listen I’m gonna go lay down. +RACHEL: I did not sell you out. +RACHEL: This is from the museum from the first time we were together. +RACHEL: We see them every day. +RACHEL: Really. +RACHEL: Okay, stop-stop! +RACHEL: Ok well, well I'm really, I'm sorry about that Joey, but do you think that maybe on some level, you don't want to take off my bra? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: That hurt. +RACHEL: I knew. +RACHEL: She’s steaming her dress, why? +RACHEL: From Gavin. +RACHEL: Diane Keaton. +RACHEL: All right, whose court is the ball in now? +RACHEL: So, we're okay? +RACHEL: I gave up, like, everything. +RACHEL: You can come out. +RACHEL: I don’t know, something either trees or disease. +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: I'm so sorry Pheebs. +RACHEL: You walked around all night in the city by yourself? +RACHEL: Well. +RACHEL: We have to throw her a shower?! +RACHEL: I'm just gonna go over there and confront them right now! +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Because, because, I just heard it. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Ok, this could be a little awkward. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Okay, well can't you just try it one more time Ross? +RACHEL: And y’know we got to talking and I. Cupid. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: So now tell me, is this genuine Muppet skin? +RACHEL: I certainly did it when we were going out. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: I’m fourth! +RACHEL: So I was with Joshua for an hour today, and he has not asked me out. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: So, if I wanna have my kid when I’m 35, I don’t have to get pregnant until I’m 34. +RACHEL: You are the official baby crier stopper! +RACHEL: Your game. +RACHEL: Boy, are you gonna be sorry if that's true. +RACHEL: Yeah, you bet. +RACHEL: I don’t want it. +RACHEL: It’s just gonna freak me out! +RACHEL: Phoebe?! +RACHEL: Joey, why don't you just tell her what happened? +RACHEL: I’m sorry about this. +RACHEL: I’m going to get in my sweats, and eat this in bed! +RACHEL: Oh Joey, honey listen, thank you for talking to my yesterday about that thing with my boss. +RACHEL: Oh please, he’ll be with his real family, the twins and little miss new boobs. +RACHEL: You’re a horny bitch! +RACHEL: I can make you a legend. +RACHEL: Uhh, well let's see. +RACHEL: Hi, guys! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: It's so much better than what I had at Ralph Lauren. +RACHEL: I love that thing. +RACHEL: And hey! +RACHEL: Well excuse me, my fashion-impaired friends, I am here to tell you that hats are back. +RACHEL: Fine! +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Absolutely. +RACHEL: God, Monica it’s on the ceiling. +RACHEL: Oh, you're not gonna believe what happened to me today! +RACHEL: Where the hell've you been? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: But y’know I gotta say, I don’t, I don’t think six years counts as an era. +RACHEL: Look at it, isn’t it beautiful? +RACHEL: I just got to figure out what I want. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: And you know when I did it, III at first I was scared, and look at me now! +RACHEL: He got down on one knee and proposed. +RACHEL: Taurus? +RACHEL: You were with Julie? +RACHEL: I am not a pushover! +RACHEL: And you know what. +RACHEL: Oh what does he know! +RACHEL: Don't you have to be a dinosaur expert or something? +RACHEL: No, not even close. +RACHEL: Next thing you know it'll be Valentine's Day, then my birthday, then bang! +RACHEL: You’re lookin’ at it upside down y’know what? +RACHEL: Y’know, they’re not gonna get married anyway! +RACHEL: Ahh. +RACHEL: Remember that big thing I was gonna tell you about? +RACHEL: Woo! +RACHEL: She was a big girl. +RACHEL: Yeah but, I've never asked a guy out before. +RACHEL: You-you actually thought that basket was gonna get you the apartment? +RACHEL: And if she sees your table she’s gonna know that I lied to her. +RACHEL: Drag-drag me down. +RACHEL: Oh he's dusting me with a fossil brush. +RACHEL: Because! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: I still have boxes at Ross’s, and I have nowhere to live! +RACHEL: Well-well that's 'cause I went down there and they were all smoking. +RACHEL: What are you gonna tell Joanna? +RACHEL: Oh, that's funny! +RACHEL: Well, look, it's hardly snowing anymore. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh, come on now, don’t keep me waiting. +RACHEL: No, that's David. +RACHEL: Chandler! +RACHEL: Okay, well then how about puberty! +RACHEL: Oh, Joey, come on! +RACHEL: Do you remember where the duck food is? +RACHEL: It’s bad enough you call your own mother that. +RACHEL: Well, what happened? +RACHEL: I was just thinking about when they were there the last time, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Yeah, and-and you better make sure he tips you this time. +RACHEL: Almost everybody knew that she was a girl. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Now this is just the first chapter, and I want your absolute honest opinion. +RACHEL: Aw. +RACHEL: And, you know, I'm not going. +RACHEL: Well sure, if you say you’re gonna take care of everything I have no reason to doubt you. +RACHEL: So how’s it goin’ with Joey? +RACHEL: All right, that's true! +RACHEL: Oh, this is unbelievable! +RACHEL: You’re Joey! +RACHEL: Here are your cakes. +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Well this is romantic! +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: Well let’s look for them. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: People love to hear that! +RACHEL: Oh thank you! +RACHEL: I imagine the two of you together and I freak out. +RACHEL: My father's boat didn't make that much noise when it hit rocks! +RACHEL: I remember laughing! +RACHEL: Ah, this place is great! +RACHEL: Aaah. +RACHEL: I'm just going to blow past it, well can't you just use that method actor thing where you use your real life memories to help you in your performance? +RACHEL: And in fact, there was actually a request for Smelly Cat. +RACHEL: Phoebe, come on, I don't wanna waste it! +RACHEL: You wanna know what else is really funny?! +RACHEL: What the hell did the damn duck do now?! +RACHEL: And Joey knows! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Yeah but y’know what they say Mon, There’s no such thing as bad press. +RACHEL: No, you gotta pick one! +RACHEL: I mean when I stuck that dollar bill in her g-string and grazed her thigh! +RACHEL: I mean, that’s got to come in handy. +RACHEL: You just ruined the thing I was practicing the whole way home, but I'm soo happy! +RACHEL: Ross, what did you get? +RACHEL: Oh, Phoebe, are you still on hold? +RACHEL: Oh God, it says he was hit by an ice cream truck and dragged for nine-teen blocks. +RACHEL: Gotta go! +RACHEL: What are you doing here? +RACHEL: Oh my God, honey, I'm so sorry! +RACHEL: Oh my God, and they’re gonna have sex! +RACHEL: I did not make out with him. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Here’s a nice shirt, look at these nice pants. +RACHEL: No, I have two sisters. +RACHEL: Hey, umm, can I ask you guys something? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Honey, it’s not just a matter of where you put it. +RACHEL: I just. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I’m not even close. +RACHEL: Who are these men? +RACHEL: When I think about not seeing you every day, it makes me not want to go. +RACHEL: Oh, I love her so much! +RACHEL: I'm just, I'm just saying if you need somebody to talk to. +RACHEL: What am I sitting on? +RACHEL: That's Mark. +RACHEL: I can't believe they're not home yet! +RACHEL: See I wanna have three kids. +RACHEL: Let'sLet's shop! +RACHEL: Oh, make it stop! +RACHEL: Um, unless, unless I use yours. +RACHEL: Now are you sure? +RACHEL: Yeah, oh wait! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh Monica! +RACHEL: Ross, that was a Halloween costume, unless you would like me to go to this thing as Little Bo Peep. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh yeah, I know, but the garbage was full. +RACHEL: Okay, what do think? +RACHEL: In my apartment! +RACHEL: I laughed a lot. +RACHEL: Oh, I can’t watch this. +RACHEL: You guys are gonna have to get married in like a, rec. +RACHEL: Ooh, oooh, oh, ah. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Ohh, it's gonna be so great! +RACHEL: Well, it's embarrassing. +RACHEL: Oh no, not in my room! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: There’s a piece that doesn’t have floor on it! +RACHEL: Ross, you have planned out the next 20 years of our lives, we've been dating for six weeks. +RACHEL: We-we custom-make tuxedos for celebrities and then when they’re done with them they just send ‘em back. +RACHEL: Newcastle disease, and I think I might have it! +RACHEL: Well, not at first, but it was very intricate work and they said even though they lost their sight, it was all worth it. +RACHEL: Hey, you guys, I finished the crossword all by myself! +RACHEL: Hello. +RACHEL: My mother picked her up two hours ago. +RACHEL: What happened to your date? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Joey, you don’t want to go on a date with a pregnant lady. +RACHEL: Here are the invitations Rachel! +RACHEL: He got all weird and sputtery and then he said uh, Yeah, I hear those hemorrhoids are a bitch. +RACHEL: Hit me. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: I mean, we're probably gonna have to clean this up! +RACHEL: Oh, God, I'm so embarrassed! +RACHEL: This is how I would hold a football. +RACHEL: Why did you tell Chandler that Monica was getting a boob job? +RACHEL: Oh, that's crazy! +RACHEL: What were you trying to put it in? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: What, slept together a year and a half ago? +RACHEL: That's Phoebe. +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Aw honey stop! +RACHEL: Well you have to because maybe it’s stupid. +RACHEL: Well. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Y'know what Katie? +RACHEL: I can't believe you would say that! +RACHEL: Let me see if she's here. +RACHEL: It's 6 o'clock in the morning! +RACHEL: Still nervous? +RACHEL: I know, I still need to talk to you. +RACHEL: Umm, well, what struck me most when reading Jane Eyre was uh, how the book was so ahead of its time. +RACHEL: I mean, she’s a little slutty, but who isn’t? +RACHEL: It was nothing! +RACHEL: You need that, you need that too ‘cause obviously, a thief could just tear this up. +RACHEL: We don't need her measurements. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Y'know I don’t, I don’t understand guys, I mean II would never congratulate Monica on a great stew by y'know, grabbin’ her boob. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Mindy! +RACHEL: I'm not! +RACHEL: That’s right Joey, the chair angel came in and heeled your chair. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: They're people, with eyes. +RACHEL: Oh, hey, don’t you have to go pick up Emily? +RACHEL: Chandler! +RACHEL: Ok. +RACHEL: No, keep moving. +RACHEL: Hey, hubby! +RACHEL: I cannot push it in! +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Ross and I were looking for you! +RACHEL: Okay, y’know, would you feel better if we went someplace else? +RACHEL: It was Paolo s cat. +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Oh for the love of God! +RACHEL: C'mon, I'm not saying it was a bad movie, I'm just saying, you know, it was a little, hard to follow. +RACHEL: Uh well, uh this is a silent auction. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Ross, get over it! +RACHEL: And? +RACHEL: No-no! +RACHEL: Okay, okay, okay, fine, I'm gonna look it up. +RACHEL: You think that’s gonna work on me?! +RACHEL: Okay, I’m just gonna go over the basic points just one more time, are you ready? +RACHEL: Well, then can we meet him? +RACHEL: Ok, Monica. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Obviously you know how to haggle, so I'm not gonna try and take you on. +RACHEL: I think you should go, by yourself, get some distance, clear your head, I think it'd be really good. +RACHEL: Y'know I can't believe I even thought about getting back together again! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: I’m having dinner with my dad tomorrow night, do you wanna come? +RACHEL: Joey, what are you doing? +RACHEL: Oh, she’s like umm…oh…who’s that kind of annoying girl soccer player? +RACHEL: I know what's going on here. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Mon? +RACHEL: If you take this monkey, I will loose one of the most important people in my life. +RACHEL: Um, second of all, what? +RACHEL: No, II just don’t know how you decide who to hire. +RACHEL: No, I think it’s very obvious who’s wrong here. +RACHEL: He's just, he's just really romantic. +RACHEL: No, you could’ve lost your job. +RACHEL: Well, lets see, we kissed for ten minutes and now we're talking to our friends about it, so I guess this is sixth grade! +RACHEL: It’s in a box in the fridge. +RACHEL: Ohh, ohh. +RACHEL: Oh, God. +RACHEL: Bye. +RACHEL: You know what, Joey, I don't think he's ever gonna be okay with this. +RACHEL: Well, I like the pretty little drawing of you in the wedding dress. +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: What married? +RACHEL: Uhh, do you guys have plans for the weekend? +RACHEL: Geez Ross, you could have showered. +RACHEL: Oh no-no-no don’t say but! +RACHEL: Or you go downtown and listen to some jazz. +RACHEL: Hi you! +RACHEL: That must be nice. +RACHEL: Those are all the things I’m responsible for! +RACHEL: Okay, fine. +RACHEL: I'm sorry about the whole lifting out thing. +RACHEL: Hey, y'know, at least you have somebody to miss that stuff with! +RACHEL: Well, then, you'll just have to eat the other lamps. +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: And I've already talked to them about our situation with Emma, and they said they'll do whatever we need to make us feel comfortable. +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: Yeah, I do. +RACHEL: Yeah, maybe if you gave this girl a chance it would go somewhere. +RACHEL: Get the hell out of there, y'know? +RACHEL: Oh thank you. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Tag? +RACHEL: Oh, who approved that order?! +RACHEL: Come on, we'll just tell them that there was. +RACHEL: I'm sorry, what did you just say? +RACHEL: They have to learn! +RACHEL: Oh Monica that was the best Thanksgiving dinner ever! +RACHEL: No it’s okay, this is what’s gonna happen. +RACHEL: Yeah, honey, they wouldn't miss this. +RACHEL: You know, when two people have a connection, you know, that's, just seems like such a, waste. +RACHEL: Well, there's two spots left right? +RACHEL: Let's just get you out of that. +RACHEL: No Ross, don’t do this. +RACHEL: Y’know, I just wanted to see if there were any leads on the old job front. +RACHEL: What if I wanna be a a purse, y'know? +RACHEL: Just watch this. +RACHEL: Come on Phoebe, look at that! +RACHEL: It's Emma's birthday! +RACHEL: Your first date, your first kiss, first time you had sex. +RACHEL: Well, Phoebe that’s fine because I’m not moving. +RACHEL: You mean, you mean 30 days? +RACHEL: Saw what? +RACHEL: Very nice. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Rachel, I'd like to say something to you. +RACHEL: Closer than here? +RACHEL: Ta-dum! +RACHEL: Yeah, I do. +RACHEL: He’s downstairs getting the rest of the stuff out of the cab. +RACHEL: Excuse me! +RACHEL: And then, then my cat died. +RACHEL: And remember how I said I was going to keep it in my purse so that if it rang I could just pick it up? +RACHEL: We heard about you in Junior High! +RACHEL: I love you. +RACHEL: Uh great! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh, hi. +RACHEL: I really couldn’t have done it without you. +RACHEL: OK Machine. +RACHEL: I can't say that I care too much for the way you've rearranged my office. +RACHEL: You guys, I'm telling you, when she runs, she looks like a cross between Kermit The Frog and The Six Million Dollar Man. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: You’re my new assistant! +RACHEL: Please, you do it for me. +RACHEL: Y'know what? +RACHEL: Wait a minute. +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: Fine! +RACHEL: Well, we should get started. +RACHEL: I didn’t. +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: All right, here's the truth um, Joey said what he said, because um, I'm attracted to you. +RACHEL: Oh, God, do you think she heard? +RACHEL: Hello?! +RACHEL: Yeah, what're you saying, you just sort of put away feelings or whatever the hell it was you felt for me? +RACHEL: Y’know, I had just rolled out of bed. +RACHEL: Oh, what a line. +RACHEL: You listen to me! +RACHEL: The way I see it——Ow! +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: Let me just check on the baby! +RACHEL: I told him he treats me like a park ranger, or something, oh and then I told him I wanted to take a break, I don't want to take a break. +RACHEL: Dark, big hair, with the airplane earrings. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: This is why Adam Carter wouldn’t go out with me! +RACHEL: Guess who we ran into today?! +RACHEL: I can’t, I can’t, I can’t, I can’t. +RACHEL: He's so gorgeous! +RACHEL: Umm. +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: You know, ever since I had that dream about him, and can't get it out of my head! +RACHEL: Oh wow! +RACHEL: But, I would keep that helmet on because you’re in for a rough ride! +RACHEL: Isn’t he? +RACHEL: Seriously, ESPN! +RACHEL: No honey, listen I think it's a great idea to become friends with someone before you date them, but I think the way you do it is y'know you meet someone, become their friend, build a foundation, then you ask them out on a date. +RACHEL: I mean I think this could maybe turn into something serious. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: I won’t speed. +RACHEL: Look. +RACHEL: What does she mean? +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Ross, could I talk to you in private? +RACHEL: Just sweep it. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Not interested. +RACHEL: So Pheebs, what is the book about? +RACHEL: I do not want Emma going to the playground. +RACHEL: What. +RACHEL: Oh no, not that. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Ok. Oh God. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You do know that I will be here when he comes over. +RACHEL: That’s why it’s so funny. +RACHEL: Veto. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Don and Janet. +RACHEL: That’s so sweet. +RACHEL: Well don’t you have that big date tonight? +RACHEL: Ughhhh! +RACHEL: This is ridiculous. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: No-no-no! +RACHEL: Yeah and I’m a horrible, horrible person. +RACHEL: Yeah, but Mon that’s totally different. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Joshua? +RACHEL: All right fine, I pick you. +RACHEL: What did he say? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: What does that say about you? +RACHEL: Yes, and I know that you’d say no if he asked you, but I’m sorry how great would you look walking down the aisle in this Donna Carin. +RACHEL: Was it so I just wouldn't go with Mark? +RACHEL: The obsession starts. +RACHEL: Excuse me, Dr. Bobby happens to be an excellent doctor. +RACHEL: Do you think we would’ve gone through with it? +RACHEL: Wow, those are really great! +RACHEL: You have to take it back, okay? +RACHEL: Last week, he brought this girl over and I started talking to her about morning sickness and then I showed her pictures from my pregnancy book. +RACHEL: Where are you going? +RACHEL: Well, we were just about to take off and see a movie. +RACHEL: You're not Ross. +RACHEL: Hey, Pheebs, check it out. +RACHEL: Some things about us, and before we can even think about the two of us getting back together, I just need to know how you feel about this stuff. +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: I'm not gonna gooo. +RACHEL: Okay, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: But Ross, you want the name Ruth! +RACHEL: Mindy my maid of. +RACHEL: That-that is your make out buddy. +RACHEL: Are you gonna, you're going to take Hugsy away from a little child? +RACHEL: We’re here! +RACHEL: Well, II said yes. +RACHEL: You get to do the presentation, you'll knock 'em dead, no one will ever remember that I worked here, and then Ralph will buy his helicopter, and Super Gavin will just fly right along side of him! +RACHEL: Oh, c'mon. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: So what are you saying I should run him under hot water and bang his head against a table? +RACHEL: You only got whipped cream in there! +RACHEL: And not just in the dumb crossword puzzle. +RACHEL: This is my business associate Gavin. +RACHEL: Y'know what? +RACHEL: We’ll be right back. +RACHEL: Oh hi. +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: Joey, I have got to tell you something! +RACHEL: Oh, good for you! +RACHEL: So later he calls me to his office and he tells me that he's gonna have to let me go, because I'm not a team player. +RACHEL: So what?! +RACHEL: What is wrong with raising a kid in the city? +RACHEL: Calm ourselves? +RACHEL: Now, do you think his 'love stick can be liberated from its denim prison'? +RACHEL: I'm just gonna go in my office and pick up some stuff. +RACHEL: Yeah, all the time, constantly. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: You said you wanted to talk about it, let’s talk about it! +RACHEL: I mean, we are way past the fling thing, I mean, I am feeling things that I've only read about in Danielle Steele books, you know? +RACHEL: Did you get to see anything good? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Hi, Julie. +RACHEL: I mean, it was sooo humiliating. +RACHEL: Honey see, it doesn't mean that I don't love you. +RACHEL: Nah, I don't really want her to see. +RACHEL: We have to find a place. +RACHEL: You got the keys. +RACHEL: Oh, and, um, sometimes Artelle lets me put the little chocolate blobbies on the cookies. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: It's Le Poo. +RACHEL: But one of them has a very masculine energy. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Remember when we went to Central Park and rented boats?. +RACHEL: Ahhh! +RACHEL: No you really think that's what it is? +RACHEL: Shhh! +RACHEL: It's just, I just heard this story in the cab, and it is all I can think about. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: I’llI’llI’llI’ll talk to her. +RACHEL: Hi Tag! +RACHEL: You, you slowpokes! +RACHEL: Well it’s hard to tell. +RACHEL: I mean what happened?! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Well, it turns out that’s not true. +RACHEL: You are dead! +RACHEL: She said she’s kinda a loner. +RACHEL: The left! +RACHEL: God, I hope he doesn't show up. +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: Patrick and I had such a great time last night! +RACHEL: Okay, well you had asked me how long we had known each other, and I said, Eight years. +RACHEL: This is, this is just a drop in the bucket mister! +RACHEL: I can't do that! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: You’ve got newspapers! +RACHEL: What is she doing here? +RACHEL: There’s gonna be rumours about this, there’s no way to stop it. +RACHEL: Oh, hmm. +RACHEL: Straight! +RACHEL: Ross, didn't you ah, play soccer in High School? +RACHEL: Ok, listen, let me explain. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Hi, it’s me. +RACHEL: I guess you weren’t there. +RACHEL: You're fly is open, Geller! +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, no, I know, II haven't been using it much. +RACHEL: Oh Mon, listen I have to ask! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: What time did your little friend leave? +RACHEL: It doesn’t happen to every guy! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Uhh, Phoebe, honey, honey, I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do actually, but if you destroy a coat like this that is like a crime against nature! +RACHEL: Is the window open? +RACHEL: You guys are gonna be so happy! +RACHEL: I don't know right, he's the pig! +RACHEL: Okay, Chandler! +RACHEL: I hope it's still funny when you're in hell. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: It’s Joey Tribbiani of Mac and C. H. E. E. S. E.! +RACHEL: Well, you know, honey, I don't think everybody gets Smelly Cat. +RACHEL: Oh, that’s great! +RACHEL: Ok. Ok, you really wanna know who it is? +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: AAnd? +RACHEL: Not in there! +RACHEL: Well that is because you have never been on a date with me before. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Yes, I’d like to order a large pizza. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: No actually that’s. +RACHEL: Ross, see! +RACHEL: Or, or is it 'cause she's like, kinda bossy, makes it feel like school? +RACHEL: Okay no way, you cannot use that to get the cute guy and the last blueberry muffin. +RACHEL: And I think I'm doing better. +RACHEL: Um, Mon, Chandler's not here. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Umm, okay. +RACHEL: Ohhh, yeah, me too. +RACHEL: Why do people keep is saying that is good to see me up and about? +RACHEL: This woman at work used it for two weeks straight and she hasn’t smoked since. +RACHEL: Phoebe, that’s huge! +RACHEL: Why are you adding, why are you adding, why are you adding, why are you adding? +RACHEL: Are you serious?! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Nobody does honey. +RACHEL: Well, good thing you number all of them, huh? +RACHEL: yeah, it's true. +RACHEL: You have to seat us somewhere else. +RACHEL: Oh, oh, and on page two, he's not 'reaching for her heaving beasts'. +RACHEL: Oh, get out of here! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Wanna know why? +RACHEL: Whoops. +RACHEL: Why would I sleep with Billy Drestin? +RACHEL: Okay, see, see, you guys, what if we don't get magic beans? +RACHEL: They really got you guys. +RACHEL: She's, uhm, not very good though. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Well, I was gonna, but I accidentally read something else. +RACHEL: So uh, so did you guys hit it off? +RACHEL: I KNOW! +RACHEL: 'Cause I don't need your stupid ship. +RACHEL: Yeah, I mean, come on Ross, no one will even notice. +RACHEL: Ross, I've bugged him about this a million times, he's not gonna change. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Well, we are ready to try anything. +RACHEL: Where’d she go? +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: Give it back! +RACHEL: I’m fine! +RACHEL: What are you talking about? +RACHEL: And it’s y’know, it’s kinda like, it’s a tie! +RACHEL: Wait, but there’s no money! +RACHEL: Oh and I’ll call ya too! +RACHEL: I'm really sorry, but I need to get off the plane, okay? +RACHEL: Oh no, wait a minute you can't, I'm sorry I forgot, she's not a lesbian. +RACHEL: No-no, they just had a big blowout over what to do with my room. +RACHEL: Okay, my boss, Joanna, when you left, she started asking questions about you. +RACHEL: All right, look. +RACHEL: We do not have a crib! +RACHEL: Did I miss it? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Well, then talk! +RACHEL: I'm gonna miss you so much. +RACHEL: Oh my god just please take her. +RACHEL: Big bear outside! +RACHEL: I did not sell you out. +RACHEL: Um, hum. +RACHEL: God. +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: I can't believe this. +RACHEL: Well, Valentine’s Day was like two weeks ago, so I wouldn’t get her a calendar! +RACHEL: You didn't tell him that, though? +RACHEL: That’s what I was gonna say. +RACHEL: You can not have two backups! +RACHEL: Monica, will-will you marry me? +RACHEL: Oh, yeah. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Yeah, I got that. +RACHEL: OK, listen, I'm sorry about last night and I really want to make it up to you. +RACHEL: I lent them to Ross. +RACHEL: But I didn’t see anything, I swear. +RACHEL: Yes, I do! +RACHEL: I wish! +RACHEL: Yes, I know! +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: So forcing her to marry Bobby is gonna make that happen? +RACHEL: Wait, I said maybe! +RACHEL: I've never done that. +RACHEL: Um, I was supposed to come here and tell you my friend thinks you're cute. +RACHEL: It's just so frustrating! +RACHEL: Do you think my nipples are too big for her mouth? +RACHEL: I was justI was just reading to Emma. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: That'll be good. +RACHEL: Uh, credit card. +RACHEL: Phoebes, this woman is voluntarily bald. +RACHEL: Please Ross, I can’t! +RACHEL: Right! +RACHEL: Oh my god, I can't believe you let me put this in my mouth. +RACHEL: Okay, it’s not Relaxi Cab. +RACHEL: Well, maybe that's my decision. +RACHEL: That's Rodney McDowell. +RACHEL: And I know what looks sexy on guys. +RACHEL: Okay, you hard worker! +RACHEL: Well we're gonna miss you around here. +RACHEL: Oh good, great! +RACHEL: You don't know anything. +RACHEL: Be-because I didn't want him to think I was stupid! +RACHEL: Why not?! +RACHEL: RACHEL: God, Ross, look, what you and I have is special, all Paolo and I ever had was. +RACHEL: Nothing! +RACHEL: What are you ever gonna use that for?! +RACHEL: I'm defrosting a chicken. +RACHEL: Is that Chase Lassiter? +RACHEL: She climbs out of the frame, and then drags her half-a-body across the floor, just looking for legs to steal. +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: To get you to make out with him! +RACHEL: It felt so good to be out. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I. Wow. +RACHEL: Anyway, speaking of drinking too much. +RACHEL: Oh I wanted to. +RACHEL: Okay, get ready to see some beggin’! +RACHEL: Oh, like I wasn't dreading tomorrow enough, having to give it back to him. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Ugh, I knew it! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: You can throw the rest away. +RACHEL: Oh God twenty seconds my ass! +RACHEL: Sit! +RACHEL: Oh man! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: It's OK, it's fine. +RACHEL: It didn't mean anything. +RACHEL: Rosss. +RACHEL: No no, 'cause mayo, that would make it gross. +RACHEL: Ahhhh. +RACHEL: Monica, Monica, look at this lamp. +RACHEL: So you're telling me that there is nothing going on between you and Chandler. +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: and he let her right in. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I'll help you throw out your purse. +RACHEL: No, it was a stupid bet! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: When all of a sudden Sweet 'n' Lo? +RACHEL: Phoebe, this is Mr. Thompson. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh, not as a friend, Phoebe! +RACHEL: Y’know, I never thought I’d say this about a movie, but I really hope this dog dies. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Really, Pheebs, you're not gonna be the one. +RACHEL: Bon giorno, caro mio. +RACHEL: Y’know like it was umm. +RACHEL: Why?! +RACHEL: Oh, uhm, excuse me, I'm here to see my father. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Well, what happened to your jam plan? +RACHEL: You're a different person. +RACHEL: Ok, ok, ok. +RACHEL: Which is just a huge step down! +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: Oh I see, so this suit is making a point. +RACHEL: If these walls could talk, y’know what they’d say? +RACHEL: I wouldn't say I had the keys unless I had the keys, and I obviously didn't have the keys. +RACHEL: Okay, y'know what? +RACHEL: Ummm. +RACHEL: This is Bonnie? +RACHEL: Score. +RACHEL: WHAT? +RACHEL: Mr. Zelner came into my office after lunch. +RACHEL: If I wanted this cake to be a disaster I would have baked it myself! +RACHEL: Monica, how come you never told me this?! +RACHEL: Eh, I’m just so sorry I put you through it. +RACHEL: Terry already hired that girl over there. +RACHEL: Oh tomorrow, oh I don’t know. +RACHEL: Ugh. +RACHEL: Uh-huh, right, yeah. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Isn’t that a kind of sushi? +RACHEL: Well, I'm also sending out, good thoughts. +RACHEL: Okay honey, you can finish this later we’re gonna be late. +RACHEL: That does! +RACHEL: Oh, Ross, you don't know that. +RACHEL: Okay Ross come on let’s just forget about the condoms. +RACHEL: That yeti is one smooth talker. +RACHEL: Oh, no-no-no, no-no-no, it has become, it has yeah. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You took your kids to Chucky Cheese, and you didn't even kiss her. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Wow, Monica, you look just like your grandmother. +RACHEL: I don’t want to do this alone! +RACHEL: How did this happen? +RACHEL: Oh wait, Ross, would you just stay and help me get dressed? +RACHEL: Ok, that's true. +RACHEL: Okay look, I have an idea. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: I have a date with Danny. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Let me give you something to think about! +RACHEL: Happy wedding day! +RACHEL: I’m guessing not very good. +RACHEL: And I can! +RACHEL: I got the date, I'm just not on it! +RACHEL: Monica, this is Dan, one of the guys that we're gonna be going out with on Saturday. +RACHEL: Hm-mmm. +RACHEL: I brought people. +RACHEL: Hey, uh, Joey? +RACHEL: Chick and the duck? +RACHEL: I just can't believe this is happening. +RACHEL: Y'know since all the Emily stuff. +RACHEL: What do you say? +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: But I don't want you to. +RACHEL: I just thought the two of us should hang out for a bit. +RACHEL: What is it? +RACHEL: One little setback is okay, just don’t let it happen again, all right? +RACHEL: Ok. Oh look at that, I don't have a pot. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Hmm. +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Uh, it’s from yore. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: When you're, and there is that moment when you are at the top, when you just don't know if you're gonna return back to earth! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Yes, somebody, uh, broke our knob on the radiator and it's really hot in here. +RACHEL: I am so psyched I kept this chair for myself! +RACHEL: I'm so not impressed. +RACHEL: Oh Phoebe! +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: You would do that? +RACHEL: Ok, we're still on that. +RACHEL: Yes, we are very sorry to tell you this, but you, Phoebe, are flaky. +RACHEL: You gave her a key to your apartment?! +RACHEL: A what?! +RACHEL: Yeah, 'cause that's why you won't get Isabella Rosselini, geography. +RACHEL: You didn't get it? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: What does it matter, what I'm wearing?! +RACHEL: Honey, maybe we should take you to a doctor. +RACHEL: Oh, my gosh. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Where was it? +RACHEL: Well, let's see. +RACHEL: Suddenly she sounds like a biblical whore. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh, Ross, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: From upstairs? +RACHEL: Look, Chandler, he has moved on, OK, you have to too. +RACHEL: Oh wait Chandler, too many cooks. +RACHEL: Right, totally. +RACHEL: Yeah that’s right! +RACHEL: Heads! +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: She forced me! +RACHEL: Switch places with me! +RACHEL: What are you guys doing? +RACHEL: No-no-no! +RACHEL: Well, I used to date him, but you’re still going out with her! +RACHEL: It happened! +RACHEL: Who's Nancy? +RACHEL: Uh, actually, I think I'm gonna be busy. +RACHEL: I’ll be watching TV if anybody needs me. +RACHEL: The plane is gone, so it looks like I'm stuck here with you guys. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I mean, it was never like that. +RACHEL: Happy and healthy! +RACHEL: Well, so, why don’t you just turn it off? +RACHEL: That’s just poking me in the eye! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh my God this is sooo humiliating. +RACHEL: Gross. +RACHEL: Oh my God, its happening. +RACHEL: She made the tea! +RACHEL: Well I’m alone and I just bought fifteen dollars worth of candy bars, what do you think? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I can't. +RACHEL: You can't move. +RACHEL: Thanks, you can just put it on the table. +RACHEL: Oh my god. +RACHEL: Look, I’m fine. +RACHEL: Is he? +RACHEL: I didn’t see anything! +RACHEL: Whup, okay. +RACHEL: For the first time in weeks, I am somewhat comfortable. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I am so sick of guys. +RACHEL: It’s left sweetie, but that’s okay sweetie, that’s a tough one. +RACHEL: Nice try! +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: Or uh, or my underwear. +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: I know Mona, just hear me out. +RACHEL: Really great. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: That is a contract! +RACHEL: Remember me? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Well, hon-ey. +RACHEL: The beef? +RACHEL: It’s really important to me, I mean it’s my mom! +RACHEL: So, I love you. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Joey and Phoebe are gonna perform a little something for us. +RACHEL: Well, I would like to have the option! +RACHEL: Ross, it, it just seems that y'know it’s time we-we y'know, move on. +RACHEL: Very impressive, do you guys have any pearls of wisdom? +RACHEL: It's okay, I really, I don't mind. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: You are undressing very quickly. +RACHEL: Just because I’m pregnant you think I’m invisible. +RACHEL: And I just-it’s just not the time for us. +RACHEL: Look you guys this is not good. +RACHEL: I'm sorry sir. +RACHEL: Beefsteak Charlie's? +RACHEL: I'm not jealous. +RACHEL: Well, y’know what? +RACHEL: Yeah, we got a lot to do! +RACHEL: It didn't! +RACHEL: See? +RACHEL: Well this has story behind it! +RACHEL: See, I knew, I knew you’d get it on the first guess. +RACHEL: And I swear, I know this sounds crazy, but every time this cat hisses at me I know it's saying, Rachel! +RACHEL: Look Joey, I’m sorry if-if you thought that was mean, but I gotta tell ya something. +RACHEL: That’s it. +RACHEL: Welcome home. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Ok. Oh I'm sorry, we're clo-. +RACHEL: So do you think that my dream means anything? +RACHEL: I haven't seen you this worked up since you did that dog food commercial and you thought you were gonna be with a real talking dog! +RACHEL: I think it's sexy. +RACHEL: I’ll go with ya. +RACHEL: I realized it was stupid to get upset about not having a husband and kids. +RACHEL: But you know what, hey, new day, new leaf, I am just really really happy. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: It was all, Once a cheater, always a cheater. +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: But the power, that is still up for grabs. +RACHEL: Mork. +RACHEL: Phoebe, his music could not get any worse. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Every year we would go out on my dad's boat and watch the fireworks. +RACHEL: You know honey, there is a thin line between love and hate, and it turns out that line is a scarf! +RACHEL: I'll pass you back to your son. +RACHEL: You’re great! +RACHEL: I was just wondering, do you think there's a possibility that you could give me an advance on my tips? +RACHEL: Okay, okay, okay should I be scared? +RACHEL: Ah. +RACHEL: Hi, me! +RACHEL: Ross, honey, it's a nice couch. +RACHEL: I don't know, I don't know, we were watching TV, and then he pooped in Monica's shoe. +RACHEL: Wait no! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh, anything yet? +RACHEL: What are you doing?! +RACHEL: Yeah well, you know what, so is uh, Sorentino's. +RACHEL: Sorry! +RACHEL: And obviously in uh, in-in this case, I am going to report back, USA not ready. +RACHEL: Phoebe just found out about Monica and Chandler. +RACHEL: Where on west 10th? +RACHEL: Jill! +RACHEL: I’m telling you it’s like watching Bambi learn how to walk. +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: Even Ross knows that! +RACHEL: Yeah but Phoebe. +RACHEL: Is that what you want to do? +RACHEL: Real fun. +RACHEL: Remember that guy who used to cry every time we had sex. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: You love those! +RACHEL: Well, sure, but they might think it’s kinda weird considering I don’t work there anymore. +RACHEL: Oh, okay see I thought, I thought you meant how much was it when it was new, y’know like back then. +RACHEL: Uh yeah, actually I kinda need to talk to you too. +RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry, I can't, I'm busy. +RACHEL: Well, who wouldn’t?! +RACHEL: But y'know umm, Rachel doesn't rhyme with draddle. +RACHEL: II have to ask her something. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: That is right and traditionally the daddy is supposed to give the mummy a present but I am prepared to let that go. +RACHEL: Oh, it was. +RACHEL: Finish! +RACHEL: And today I just stopped and I said, 'What if I don't wanna be a shoe? +RACHEL: We can't do that! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: You do not bring a picnic basket to somebody's work! +RACHEL: OK? +RACHEL: And then we had a little wine, we got to talking, and the next thing you know out of nowhere Ross comes on to me. +RACHEL: Listen, Paul, I think this is really great that-that y’know, you shared your feelings. +RACHEL: You really think it would be that different? +RACHEL: Oh my God Monica, who is that? +RACHEL: So you're gonna go with the uh, waiting thing? +RACHEL: Umm, okay, just turn around. +RACHEL: I should just tell her the truth. +RACHEL: Yes, okay, oh, by the way, I just gotta say, I think it's really nice of you that even after you've moved, you still keep storing that stuff for Joey! +RACHEL: Umm, well I would have to say that it's a, it's tragic love story. +RACHEL: Well y’know what? +RACHEL: We're good people! +RACHEL: Heey man, I work out. +RACHEL: I’m not! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I even made him laugh. +RACHEL: No, we didn’t get married! +RACHEL: Seriously stop it, or I'm gonna jump on ya. +RACHEL: Okay, I know it was a cheap shot, but I feel SO much better now. +RACHEL: Well, what about my stuff? +RACHEL: All right, so. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh okay, I see what you’re doing there. +RACHEL: I can’t say that I’m surprised. +RACHEL: Me too. +RACHEL: Oh no, I really don’t want any——Oh! +RACHEL: Phoebe! +RACHEL: Is she gonna be okay? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: No matter how much we want it. +RACHEL: Then she’ll have to come back here and live all alone. +RACHEL: Shhh don't say that loud, Gunther's gonna want to hug me. +RACHEL: And an assistant. +RACHEL: Phoebe? +RACHEL: Oooh. +RACHEL: You are a petty, petty. +RACHEL: You! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I gotta tell you though, I am, I am having the hardest time placing you. +RACHEL: With my alignment. +RACHEL: Yeah, I mean I was up sick all night. +RACHEL: Look, I am so so happy for you guys, but you getting married just reminds me of the fact that I’m not. +RACHEL: is something I'm very interested in! +RACHEL: And until now, I didn’t think I’d love again. +RACHEL: Well, what is a boss for? +RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry, I guess I just bring it out in him. +RACHEL: Yeah, one time, when we were dating, uh we got a late checkout, he got so excited it was the best sex we ever had. +RACHEL: Oh, please, I don't care about you enough to bug me. +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Ohhh! +RACHEL: Yeah, well, it's an important day. +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: Op! +RACHEL: Rob Tillman! +RACHEL: I don’t suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but… Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh my gosh, Joshua! +RACHEL: Who's not having. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: I d, it’s just a little weird, it’s you, and it’s me, it's just gonna take some getting used to. +RACHEL: God, growing up here, this place must’ve been a real babe magnet. +RACHEL: Yeah, he broke those too. +RACHEL: I’m very comfortable. +RACHEL: Well, I just checked our messages and Joshua didn't call. +RACHEL: Can you believe that?! +RACHEL: Oh-oh, Pottery Barn! +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: I don't think if I feel comfortable stealing on my very first day. +RACHEL: Are you serious—Really?! +RACHEL: Well, then, I guess that's the difference between us. +RACHEL: Listen to what Sean McMahon wrote in my yearbook senior year, Dear Rach, you’re such a good person. +RACHEL: That's not Monica! +RACHEL: Oh, why do you even bother? +RACHEL: I’m just gonna grab a couple of these. +RACHEL: Well, ok, well that's very nice. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, I don't care how much she tells you she wants it, I don't care if begs, she pleads, she tells you she, she's gonna have sex with, with another man. +RACHEL: Okay, two larges coming right up! +RACHEL: This is our first date. +RACHEL: Thank God! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: You’re the talker. +RACHEL: Oh yeah? +RACHEL: Okay, she’s kicking! +RACHEL: It was fine. +RACHEL: We need a hat. +RACHEL: That wouldn’t help me. +RACHEL: Oh God, Phoebe! +RACHEL: Ross do you realise this is the first time in my life I’m doing something I actually care about. +RACHEL: Uh-huh! +RACHEL: Don’t be such a goodie-goodie! +RACHEL: Seriously. +RACHEL: I can’t do it! +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Maybe it’s not as bad as I think. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Ha! +RACHEL: Uh, morning. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I made the mistake of telling him that I was pregnant. +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Well maybe it would make me feel better if I slept with Joey. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, sorry. +RACHEL: You know what, I can't do this. +RACHEL: I am not a baby. +RACHEL: Well actually umm. +RACHEL: Miren! +RACHEL: Oooh, honey, you're not a total loser. +RACHEL: Does anybody need coffee? +RACHEL: Now he's Rrrooossss, oh, this really great guy that I can't have. +RACHEL: You guys, come on, it doesn't matter why we're late. +RACHEL: On a cake shaped like a bunny. +RACHEL: This is the world’s worst hangover! +RACHEL: Pheebs, what-what are you doing? +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: Anyway, um, I guess this belongs to you. +RACHEL: I know I had it this morning, and I know I had it when I was in the kitchen with. +RACHEL: No, no, not at the moment, no, I'm not. +RACHEL: Oh my God, I can’t believe this is a real 20,000 check, oh this is just so exciting. +RACHEL: You have been maid of honor before?! +RACHEL: What!? +RACHEL: Hi, I'm Rachel. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Ohh, yes. +RACHEL: Chandler? +RACHEL: Y'know, as someone who's recently been dumped? +RACHEL: I screwed up so bad, I told Monica that I would stuff and send all these wedding invitations like weeks ago and II… II know—I had put them in…in-in my desk at work and I completely forgot about them until today. +RACHEL: Thanks for lunch, Chandler. +RACHEL: I was just being a good teacher. +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: I feel a little umm. +RACHEL: I wonder how I should be? +RACHEL: Okay, you’d tell me the truth. +RACHEL: He's gonna stay with Julie, isn't he? +RACHEL: I just need to be by myself for a while, you know? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I know that. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Hey, do you guys have hi. +RACHEL: Remember? +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: How are you doing? +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: This is Joey, and Phoebe, and this is Chandler, and you remember Ross. +RACHEL: 35 years. +RACHEL: Eww! +RACHEL: Ow. +RACHEL: So Pheebs, pick one of them. +RACHEL: Dr. Long, I’ve been at this for seventeen hours! +RACHEL: Oh, I can t believe I ever let him touch me with those fingers. +RACHEL: Ohhh. +RACHEL: I thought this was going to be something we could do together! +RACHEL: I'm trying to put Emma down for a nap, have you seen Hugsy? +RACHEL: It’s okay! +RACHEL: Umm, okay, just hold on a second. +RACHEL: Not in the street! +RACHEL: Would you like to go to a basketball game with me? +RACHEL: Okay, uh. +RACHEL: Did you just say Emma? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: She doesn't die. +RACHEL: He was right there. +RACHEL: Nice seizing, gel boy. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: So fellas. +RACHEL: You lift right out. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Nooooo! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Nothing. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: You’re leaving?! +RACHEL: Oh, sorry. +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Seriously! +RACHEL: Phoebe, are you okay? +RACHEL: Pheebs, I don’t know what to say. +RACHEL: It doesn’t even fit you anymore! +RACHEL: I mean, what Chandler, look at that. +RACHEL: I still want my daughters picture, but on a bunny cake. +RACHEL: I’m sure there’s some explanation. +RACHEL: What if I clean your bathroom for a month? +RACHEL: No, no, in fact, you're not having a boy. +RACHEL: So there, all right, there's your goodbye. +RACHEL: So you’re saying that if I called it, it wouldn’t ring? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Good. +RACHEL: Should we start looking for a new place? +RACHEL: Come on, give me one good reason why you don't wanna go. +RACHEL: Actually, y'know that's not the Thanksgiving I was talking about. +RACHEL: Ok, it was good with Paolo. +RACHEL: Well, II could live without it. +RACHEL: Ooh, good God, they’re so yummy! +RACHEL: I’m sorry. +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: I am not leaving here, until you call. +RACHEL: Seriously I can't do this. +RACHEL: Good luck Chandler. +RACHEL: I am such a huge fan! +RACHEL: Wait a minute, you’re only giving free stuff away to the pretty girls? +RACHEL: So, I still have boxes here. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Closure. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Ok. Mhm-mh! +RACHEL: Okay, I'll see you after the thing. +RACHEL: I’ll tell ya who should be embarrassed! +RACHEL: Me? +RACHEL: Dear Rach, you’re a great person. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Abort the plan, abort the plan. +RACHEL: Hi Ben! +RACHEL: It's in Paris. +RACHEL: I’m sorry for your loss! +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Are you serious?! +RACHEL: You can go. +RACHEL: Ross, I watched you get hypnotised in Atlantic City. +RACHEL: And then JeanClaude took me to that place Crossroads and that's where we hung out with Drew Barrymore. +RACHEL: I already ruined her first birthday. +RACHEL: We only hung out every night. +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Mild discomfort, what’s he talking about? +RACHEL: Rachel, Phoebe’s. +RACHEL: Hey Mon, look what I just found on the floor. +RACHEL: All gone! +RACHEL: Yes she is, just one moment please. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: No that could kill her. +RACHEL: We'll just quit! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: We can just unlock the door. +RACHEL: I'm just not going. +RACHEL: Oh, no the Melons, they hate all living things! +RACHEL: Oh I cannot believe those two! +RACHEL: I know it's been really hard for you. +RACHEL: We were just playing a game! +RACHEL: That’s what you just said! +RACHEL: I can’t talk to you. +RACHEL: Don’t try to blue pin me! +RACHEL: Maybe Joey's right. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: All right honey, we'd better go if we wanna catch that movie. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: Well, what are you going to wear? +RACHEL: Come on Louisa, you have a chance to be the bigger person here. +RACHEL: Ross, you should give yourself credit. +RACHEL: This is gonna be a while. +RACHEL: Why can't they get one of those bugs, ya know, one of those fruitflys, those things that live for like a day or something? +RACHEL: What is this thing? +RACHEL: We're cool. +RACHEL: They sent me home from work. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Ooh, this is soo sweet, Joey our little twinkle-toes. +RACHEL: How about Dayton? +RACHEL: Someone that is your age, that is smart, that is fun and that you care about! +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: So how was your day? +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah, I know. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: It was just, it was just the perfect way to say goodbye. +RACHEL: Y’know Joey, I could teach you to sail if you want. +RACHEL: Just pretend like we don’t know him. +RACHEL: Look. +RACHEL: You slept with someone. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh wow! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Honey, all those buys had a bet to see if he can knock you over. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Welcome to our country. +RACHEL: You’re bachelor pad?! +RACHEL: But maybe if we keep that drawer shut, it'll die. +RACHEL: Get in the front! +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: I'm with you. +RACHEL: Okay, they wanna know if I'm okay, okay, let's see. +RACHEL: Everybody listens to you. +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: UCHH! +RACHEL: Oh, would you just see my chiropractor, already. +RACHEL: Hey, time-out, umm, yeah, does the captain know that we're moving? +RACHEL: All right, fine, but don’t get mad at me. +RACHEL: Hello baby girl. +RACHEL: I've been here about six years, and Rachel moved in a few months ago. +RACHEL: And y'know what, I’m gonna, I’m gonna go to bed now, but ah, on my way to work tomorrow morning, I’m gonna stop by around 8:30. +RACHEL: Aw. +RACHEL: Uh, yeah, uh, hold on a second. +RACHEL: Phoebe? +RACHEL: I get it! +RACHEL: So if I said yes, he would know I had nothing better to do than wait around for an invitation to his stupid party. +RACHEL: Pheebs. +RACHEL: Pheebs, you lie down? +RACHEL: It’s better to be over the hill then buried under it. +RACHEL: My gynecologist tried to kill me. +RACHEL: Will? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Yeah, but I don’t know why. +RACHEL: Oh, Kim, Hi. +RACHEL: No, I just mean that, you know, first impressions don't mean anything. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Phoebe the father is not here okay? +RACHEL: You’ve got the wind in your h, arms! +RACHEL: And our coconuts kept knockin’ together? +RACHEL: Ugh, who would buy this?! +RACHEL: I got fired today. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: All right, cut, let’s pick again, pick again. +RACHEL: I'm like the other woman! +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: But she'll be up soon. +RACHEL: Go back to repeating! +RACHEL: Joey, we're not keeping this! +RACHEL: Oh honey, but you love that name. +RACHEL: I'm so glad I could help. +RACHEL: Guess what. +RACHEL: Good luck, Emma! +RACHEL: Well, what am I gonna call her? +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: I mean I love my mother, but my God, a long lunch with her is taxing. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: You WHAT? +RACHEL: I'd need an expense account. +RACHEL: Okay, y’know maybe I should come back… Okay. +RACHEL: Ok, listen, I'm thinking, why don't we just tell them who we really are. +RACHEL: Bye hon. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh, I wish he was a doll, then I could get a Rachel doll and bump them together and make kissy noises. +RACHEL: So? +RACHEL: How can I just tell him? +RACHEL: Dude, Where's My Car? +RACHEL: I m sorry. +RACHEL: Yee. +RACHEL: I cannot believe Ross is buying this! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: What bank is this? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: Oh God, but wait she’ll be in the gown and then he won’t show up and then she’s gonna have to take off the gown. +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Umm, well, first I would like to start by apologizing for kissing you and uh, for yelling at you. +RACHEL: I don’t know why they didn’t just tell us. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Come on, please?! +RACHEL: Oh-oh-oh, he’s a transponce—transpondster! +RACHEL: What are you thinking right now? +RACHEL: All right, back to work. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: I fell for you and I get clobbered. +RACHEL: Yeah—No wait! +RACHEL: Are you seein' her again tonight? +RACHEL: I mean, so you said my name! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Your company has a fine foods division? +RACHEL: Joey. +RACHEL: I’m not. +RACHEL: Ohh, I want somebody! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Honey, come on, I have to be at work in like ten minutes Oh, all right, well it's not like I'm employee of the year or anything. +RACHEL: My due date is in one week! +RACHEL: Y'know what? +RACHEL: The party's gonna cost you way more than that. +RACHEL: And that's I'm so glad there's no problem. +RACHEL: Oh, okay. +RACHEL: You freak. +RACHEL: Oh, sorry. +RACHEL: Take it all. +RACHEL: I finally got her back in the chair, bairly touched her with a needle, she jumped up screaming, and that was it. +RACHEL: I can handle this. +RACHEL: I mean imagine bringing home some girl and trying to score when there’s a screaming baby around. +RACHEL: Melissa, what’s up? +RACHEL: It's Phoebe! +RACHEL: Joey, what are you talking about? +RACHEL: I'm hoping that if she hears it enough it will be her first word. +RACHEL: I will. +RACHEL: Or dancing—Oh! +RACHEL: Oh no-no-no-no, no! +RACHEL: Hur hur hur. +RACHEL: Oh god. +RACHEL: Happy New Year, Joey! +RACHEL: Thanks for everything. +RACHEL: And by the way, have I mentioned that back in high school, I was a cow. +RACHEL: I'm uh I'm okay. +RACHEL: Are you sure? +RACHEL: This is Emma's first Thanksgiving! +RACHEL: Right after you left they wheeled her off into delivery. +RACHEL: Ohh, whoa God! +RACHEL: Woo-hoo. +RACHEL: I mean you’re up against the guy who survived his own cremation. +RACHEL: Oh, oh, those little clunkly Amish things you think go with everything. +RACHEL: Oh, and somebody can get those leather pants she's always. +RACHEL: What are you guys doing here? +RACHEL: OK, you're bein' a little weird about your phone. +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Well, you would know. +RACHEL: Come on. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Now that you’re on you’re own, you’re free to look as stupid as you like. +RACHEL: Y'know, II gotta tell ya, those eye drops are a miracle. +RACHEL: No, I said today! +RACHEL: Hey… You’re out of Diet Coke. +RACHEL: Chandler! +RACHEL: Ohh, that is soo sad. +RACHEL: Yeah, what the hell did I know! +RACHEL: Come on help me move this. +RACHEL: I. I guess I felt guilty that you were here, which I shouldn't. +RACHEL: Oh honey, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: mh hmm. +RACHEL: Thanks to you I’m half way there! +RACHEL: Ok, let me take these cakes back 'cause they're gonna take that out of my paycheck. +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh my God, Monica’s gonna go out with a millionaire. +RACHEL: Absolutely! +RACHEL: Tell me about your childhood! +RACHEL: Uhh, Ross, y'know what, there's something that I-that I have to talk to you about and everybody's saying that I shouldn't tell you, but I think they're wrong. +RACHEL: Phoebe, I mean, you do know he’s married? +RACHEL: All right, wherever you wanna go is cool. +RACHEL: Well it’s only different if he wants it to be. +RACHEL: I probably should, but I'm not, see 'cause I promised myself that I would make it through at least one of your weddings. +RACHEL: I am not going to vacuum up my baby! +RACHEL: I mean come on, you remember what’s it’s like to be 19 and in love. +RACHEL: Oh, hi! +RACHEL: What college was that Dina? +RACHEL: Yeah, love. +RACHEL: Because it is too damn hard Ross. +RACHEL: Okay, so anyway I’m sittin’ in my office and guess who walks in. +RACHEL: And she's a woman, and she's almost 30, and y'know it's Monica. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Umm, well let’s see uh, this one is Tom Brokaw. +RACHEL: Well of course I do! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: You really are freakishly strong! +RACHEL: I can imagine you in a short plaid skirt and knee socks. +RACHEL: And a uh good example of the fun I was referring to uhh, but I just think I’m past the point where I think I can y’know, just have fun. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Tag! +RACHEL: I mean in if two years if you’re not engaged you just don’t use it. +RACHEL: Well, you were pretty damnedy good. +RACHEL: That is our friend! +RACHEL: Oh no. +RACHEL: You could tell us whether it’s a boy or a girl? +RACHEL: Jill, honey, I think this is the best thing that could’ve ever happened to you. +RACHEL: Umm, yes, I can do that! +RACHEL: I mean, you do remember what happened to the little girl that tried to much too fast don’t you? +RACHEL: Just go in there and like, shave her head! +RACHEL: Umm, or, maybe, I should stay away from all men. +RACHEL: Phoebe. +RACHEL: If you feel yourself reaching for that phone, then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath. +RACHEL: Love to love ya, baby! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Chandler M. Bing? +RACHEL: You could fit her right in your little pocket! +RACHEL: Man! +RACHEL: Oh-oh-oh, he's a transponce, transpondster! +RACHEL: Well, we have gotta find out if he's alive. +RACHEL: Oh, no problem. +RACHEL: I mean I’m playing by the rules. +RACHEL: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late. +RACHEL: Well, that doesn't sound like a very merry Christmas. +RACHEL: Oh, no! +RACHEL: Sagittarius? +RACHEL: Well, she told me. +RACHEL: Yes, I realize that. +RACHEL: Rachel Green's office! +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: On someone's lips? +RACHEL: Okay, do you know how, just sweep it across the lid. +RACHEL: You started this, now you finish it! +RACHEL: You're pretty. +RACHEL: I’m not vanilla! +RACHEL: Come on, you don’t have to do that! +RACHEL: Ohh, you should know, this place is a real babe magnet. +RACHEL: Doesn’t she look scared? +RACHEL: Are they in love? +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: Thank you very much! +RACHEL: Hi guys! +RACHEL: Yes okay. +RACHEL: Umm… I’m never gonna getting married! +RACHEL: Yeti. +RACHEL: So I take it you’ve had one of these Braxton thingies? +RACHEL: All right fine! +RACHEL: That's fine. +RACHEL: Well, what did you find out? +RACHEL: I’m really coming around on the name Ruth. +RACHEL: Ok, Paulo, why don't you just go get dressed, and then you be on your way, ok, bye-bye. +RACHEL: I mean that makes, that makes everything different. +RACHEL: Joey, just because they’re not getting married doesn’t mean this is going to be a disaster. +RACHEL: I woke up today with the biggest smile on my face. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: What about Monica. +RACHEL: I hope you two are very happy, I really do. +RACHEL: Oh my God, they told us that was for the mascot! +RACHEL: Why are we moving? +RACHEL: Well, uh, II don't know. +RACHEL: You really—You look great. +RACHEL: Monica, come on please hurry up honey! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I mean, would you call Ted Kopel a gossip? +RACHEL: Darnit! +RACHEL: I realised that this place, is very unsafe for a baby. +RACHEL: Did that guy call? +RACHEL: According to the back cover of that book that you gave me. +RACHEL: Oh no! +RACHEL: I mean is that woman capable of talking about anything else but sex? +RACHEL: Ohh, I’ve been waitin’ so long to get on that body! +RACHEL: They are my friends, I wouldn’t punch any of them. +RACHEL: Yes, she is, hold on a second, please. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: This is your lucky day Mr. Bowmont, the uh gentleman day sailer as just become available again and I believe that you made a bid of 18,000. +RACHEL: You know you kissed me first. +RACHEL: Pheebs! +RACHEL: The hair comes out, and the gloves come on. +RACHEL: The point is, I was right. +RACHEL: All right, look you guys. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: You can't do that! +RACHEL: Ross, it took you ten years to finally admit you liked me. +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: Nooo! +RACHEL: I did not say anything, I swear. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Yeah well unless we tell him. +RACHEL: You know, we're just gonna have to figure out a plan tonight. +RACHEL: Nooooo! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Oh, if I only want two kids, can I keep him for another year? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Let's do it! +RACHEL: You what? +RACHEL: We went out. +RACHEL: Good different? +RACHEL: It sure didn’t look this way when I lived here. +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Oh my god, are we supposed to answer? +RACHEL: Oh really, OK. What? +RACHEL: So, come on, what was the big news Pete wanted to tell you Mon?! +RACHEL: Heyyyyy! +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: No, forget it! +RACHEL: That was her idea, I just gave her a nudge. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Ugh, I mean thirty! +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Y’know, they didn’t get us anything. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I mean I’m really worried the baby’s not going to like him. +RACHEL: Oh Chandler! +RACHEL: That's all right! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Now since daddy paid for all this stuff, I should take it all away. +RACHEL: In a minute! +RACHEL: Like what? +RACHEL: Oh god. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Yeah, Why? +RACHEL: OK, OK. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: That's so great! +RACHEL: My dad’s proud of me! +RACHEL: I take the uh dead flowers out of the vase. +RACHEL: But honey, I think she’s moving in with Chandler. +RACHEL: Of course it’s true and it hurts so bad. +RACHEL: Shut up, that was my friend Melissa from college. +RACHEL: Go back to sleep. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, sure, it's umm. +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Yeah no, I mean it was at a flea market, so it was y’know, it was like a dollar. +RACHEL: And, and Ross. +RACHEL: Okay, okay, okay, look, just don't freak out, but I kinda lost it. +RACHEL: I just. +RACHEL: Pretty uhm, different huh? +RACHEL: OK, Phoebes, I was hoping for more of a change. +RACHEL: They fired me and then out of nowhere they just hire me back! +RACHEL: So this is pretty rare. +RACHEL: Oh, he brought her back to his apartment. +RACHEL: Maybe there's a like league we could join or something. +RACHEL: Phoebe, no! +RACHEL: Hey, listen, Joey, about Molly, I really prefer if you didn't go after her. +RACHEL: See that's a good boy. +RACHEL: Maybe they have tools. +RACHEL: Hey, umm, do you guys have that tape measure? +RACHEL: I ah, will buy and wrap all of your Christmas gifts. +RACHEL: I’m unpacking! +RACHEL: Oh, right. +RACHEL: No like, What’s that?! +RACHEL: I must have packed it in one of these boxes! +RACHEL: Phoebe we just saw mine, let me see yours. +RACHEL: Of course you did Ross, you would date a gorilla if it called you Indiana Jones! +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: What've you got? +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: The credit card people said that you only have to pay for the stuff that you bought. +RACHEL: I guess I just figured that somewhere down the road, we would be on again. +RACHEL: Yeah, well, y'know umm. +RACHEL: I wouldn't call my online dating profile a resumé. +RACHEL: Now, that-that was a good thing that I told you, right? +RACHEL: Oh-oh hang on! +RACHEL: And now I’m not saying that there’s any connection here y’know, but they did tell me that’s why they got divorced. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: No, he told me. +RACHEL: Mon, honey, I gotta ask you something. +RACHEL: I think it’s great! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: ah ha ha. +RACHEL: Hey, how'd the interview go? +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Oh, wait yes, but I can’t eat too much. +RACHEL: And um, excuse me, he helps me. +RACHEL: Jurassic Park could happen. +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: I mean, no offense, I've always thought of Ben as a fairly bumpy headed child. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: I got a second interview! +RACHEL: It’s gonna poop! +RACHEL: How's it goin'? +RACHEL: And look, and it's-it's purple! +RACHEL: And I will get over it. +RACHEL: Chandler, that's not enough. +RACHEL: Probably just the first half. +RACHEL: Um look I was thinking. +RACHEL: I mean, why all the sudden are you so. +RACHEL: Amy runs towards Rachel and Rachel puts her arm out, hand on Amy's head and Amy starts trying to hit her but is missing, Rachel is moving backwards towards the table when her hand swipes the one plate left on the table on to. +RACHEL: Thirty. +RACHEL: I haven't seen you in like, a year. +RACHEL: And my veil was lace, made by blind, Belgium nuns. +RACHEL: Was that all you wanted to ask me? +RACHEL: It's what I had with Barry, that was one of the reasons I left. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: These are, these aren't for you. +RACHEL: Ben, it's Rachel! +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: We're gonna have hair and make-up going on in the bathroom and oh, I had to move a couple of things in the fridge to make room for the corsages. +RACHEL: Oh wow, you didn’t even try to unhook my bra! +RACHEL: No it's not! +RACHEL: Oh, look at her, so happy! +RACHEL: All right here, this is what we’re gonna do! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Those boots are amazing! +RACHEL: I’m sooo good! +RACHEL: Just give us a second. +RACHEL: Look kinda familiar? +RACHEL: You take half and I take half! +RACHEL: 'Okay. +RACHEL: What. +RACHEL: I get it! +RACHEL: Oh does it matter?! +RACHEL: Ross, I don’t think I have ever been this angry! +RACHEL: Well better than you, but y’know still not what you want. +RACHEL: Monica: You don't have insurance? +RACHEL: Ross is a great guy! +RACHEL: Oh, hi Mrs. Lynch! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Yeah, that’s gonna get you into Soap Opera Digest. +RACHEL: Okay bye, call me when you get this message. +RACHEL: That must've felt so great! +RACHEL: Or do you just hang out with your wife or girlfriend? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: You meddled in our relationship! +RACHEL: Okay umm, now I know I already said courage, but y'know you gotta have courage. +RACHEL: Well, that’s a lot better than Ross trying to kiss me in High School, and saying that he did it because he needed chapstick. +RACHEL: Ross, you're scaring me. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Phoebe, your in pain, would you just go to the dentist, just go. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I'm sorry, this sounds like something I'm never gonna be interested in. +RACHEL: Oops. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: What happened to you? +RACHEL: Oh, Ross, this is just so messed up! +RACHEL: This is so exciting! +RACHEL: Let me see that! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Umm, I’m a recovering alcoholic. +RACHEL: Of course he's not gonna show up, the guy hates me. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I know, I just didn't want to wear my glasses on my first date. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Okay, Monica, y'know what, honey, you're kinda losing it here! +RACHEL: You're kidding. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: What’s up? +RACHEL: Well actually, if I’m wishin’ for stuff, I actually wish I was six years younger. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You guys have your stupid little club, but I would just like to say is what you did to me is way worse than what I did to you! +RACHEL: Ow. +RACHEL: My God! +RACHEL: I'm sorry, but she sounded generally upset! +RACHEL: Ross, I think I'm just a more secure person than you are. +RACHEL: Of course he will! +RACHEL: See look, men, carrying the bag. +RACHEL: I know, it's sick. +RACHEL: Just gonna say it. +RACHEL: He's straight, right? +RACHEL: Yes, Chandler, that's exactly what it is. +RACHEL: No way did you do this. +RACHEL: It is our first official date. +RACHEL: Okay, y’know what, y’know what? +RACHEL: I did not know you spoke French. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: He's gonna be home any minute. +RACHEL: Oh, this lipstick looks just great on you. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: ‘Cause I was, I was your daddy’s girlfriend. +RACHEL: Well then I can't tell you what I know. +RACHEL: I love you. +RACHEL: I wouldn't worry about it. +RACHEL: I can't watch. +RACHEL: We should be packing you! +RACHEL: It's true, my right leg is two inches shorter. +RACHEL: Well this is terrible! +RACHEL: I’m pregnant. +RACHEL: Well listen, if you see Joey will you just tell him uh…tell him I miss him. +RACHEL: I don’t care! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Anybody! +RACHEL: I'm tired of being clobbered, ya know, it's, it's just not worth it. +RACHEL: Well, y'know what, no, you do not make my decisions because y'know what, you're fired. +RACHEL: Don't say that I have no sentiment! +RACHEL: Nope! +RACHEL: Is that wine? +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: Anything. +RACHEL: Well look who’s here! +RACHEL: Good-bye! +RACHEL: Oh, I seem to have dropped my fork. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Exactly. +RACHEL: Yeah, it's kinda like a 'good luck on your first day' sort of thing. +RACHEL: Wanting what you can’t have! +RACHEL: You want it? +RACHEL: Yeah and honey I promise next time that I will just say good-bye and tell ‘em you’re not looking for a relationship. +RACHEL: Pheebs, I have to ask you. +RACHEL: I’m so sorry. +RACHEL: Uhh, I mean this is like reading about my own life. +RACHEL: Yeah, sure. +RACHEL: Uh, I don't have any brothers so I don't know, but uh, did you guys wrestle? +RACHEL: Okay, I have to tell you something that I have never admitted during our entire friendship! +RACHEL: Hi Mark! +RACHEL: Check out is not ‘til noon and he has a good eleven minutes left. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah? +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: What are you saying, that I’m a pushover? +RACHEL: Well? +RACHEL: You took the same class twice. +RACHEL: So Monica, you are now in control of my love life. +RACHEL: No switching, and don’t come crying to me if you eat your piece to fast. +RACHEL: I really, really want this job and I think, I think I would be really good at it. +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: I really hope it’s you! +RACHEL: You like me for what, a year, you didn't do anything about it. +RACHEL: Okay, bye. +RACHEL: That was one time, Ross, and they were only like 5 milligrams. +RACHEL: I’m happy for him! +RACHEL: Pheebs, that's for men! +RACHEL: Hey, do you guys have any extra ribbon? +RACHEL: I am soo not going to do good on my SATs tomorrow. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: You know, someone who's, like, who's like your best friend, but then also can make your toes curl? +RACHEL: Hey, y’know what? +RACHEL: Absolutely! +RACHEL: Oh Mom! +RACHEL: No, you do it. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: I just purchased the LaZBoy E-cliner 3000. +RACHEL: Well, you more then me, but he can’t stay to mad at me. +RACHEL: Yeah, it is. +RACHEL: How do you know? +RACHEL: your comfort first. +RACHEL: I did not see the bird! +RACHEL: I mean you’re 25! +RACHEL: Even Ross? +RACHEL: It doesn't seem desperate? +RACHEL: But honey he calls everybody by a nickname! +RACHEL: Ohhh, II would enjoy that! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Some uh, some visual aides. +RACHEL: I hate the color of these walls! +RACHEL: Ahh, here’s a box of your stuff. +RACHEL: You-you're the one who's been telling me to get over Ross and move on. +RACHEL: Well now what’s the rush? +RACHEL: Oh, ah with who? +RACHEL: No, I'm still going. +RACHEL: Where-where are you from? +RACHEL: Hi, Pheebs? +RACHEL: Joey, don't touch it! +RACHEL: And when they ask me what I saw, I can be very generous or very stingy. +RACHEL: Well, people are different. +RACHEL: This is pretty. +RACHEL: Hi honey! +RACHEL: Honey, it can't be that hard, I mean, you've been in love before? +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, I got a cat. +RACHEL: You're not allowed to have cups out here, it's a thing. +RACHEL: Oh God, how could I be so stupid?! +RACHEL: I have to make all these decisions that I don’t want to make. +RACHEL: I think you should definitely go out with this guy. +RACHEL: What would you give up, sex or food? +RACHEL: Are you kidding? +RACHEL: uh huh. +RACHEL: I'll do it. +RACHEL: And-and what else? +RACHEL: Oh, hey, do you need help with that? +RACHEL: Ok-dokey, Joey, listen. +RACHEL: I get it! +RACHEL: I would wait and wait, then I'd wait some more. +RACHEL: All right Paul, I’m not asking for a lot here. +RACHEL: Hey, we have that 60 bucks from Ross. +RACHEL: His name is um, Mark something. +RACHEL: And I know it’s gonna take patience, but that’s ok. Amy, that’s what I was supposed to wear today, that’s why I hung it on the door. +RACHEL: Did he call? +RACHEL: They won't take her back. +RACHEL: We’re not actors. +RACHEL: I don’t like sitting up here! +RACHEL: You've got plugs! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Yes you do, if you're going to make me feel guilty for getting a free massage! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Had to get rid of it. +RACHEL: Tell me something Joey. +RACHEL: So how is the uhm, baby styling business going? +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh no? +RACHEL: Hiiiii, Ross! +RACHEL: She’s gonna want to sleep in my bed with me. +RACHEL: I mean, it was so weirdest thing. +RACHEL: You have every right to go nuts. +RACHEL: No no no no, no. +RACHEL: Oh, terrific! +RACHEL: Well it didn’t happen. +RACHEL: And the uh, and the uh pants. +RACHEL: Um-hmm. +RACHEL: Umm. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Okay, I'll see you guys later. +RACHEL: Oh, I mean, look at this mess! +RACHEL: You’re the one who wants to make this big change and move in with Chandler! +RACHEL: Okay Monica, did you know about this?! +RACHEL: Well do you get to look through one of those like, those periscope thingys. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: It’s gonna be up all night! +RACHEL: Ok I gotta tell ya, it's really weird when you use my whole name. +RACHEL: You shut up! +RACHEL: He got it a flea market! +RACHEL: Ok? +RACHEL: there are people that go through life never having that kind of. +RACHEL: It's kind of weird talking to you about this, but. +RACHEL: I’ve been waiting for this for months! +RACHEL: You did. +RACHEL: Here it is: the fleshy, spore-bearing inner mass of a certain fungi. +RACHEL: Well. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: So bad. +RACHEL: Yes you did, my roommate wrote it down. +RACHEL: And with Chandler in the next room. +RACHEL: Here are your keys, hon. +RACHEL: You just said it! +RACHEL: Oh-oh! +RACHEL: All right, pick a half. +RACHEL: Yeah, and I know that. +RACHEL: Phoebe, you're on. +RACHEL: Ohh, good. +RACHEL: My God, sorry! +RACHEL: Where'd you get the hickey? +RACHEL: Just think. +RACHEL: No, I’m just kidding I would never do that to you! +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: When you were in China. +RACHEL: Oh, hi! +RACHEL: Otherwise next time you're gonna find yourself sitting at home, listening to that album alone. +RACHEL: Chandler, aren't you worried about what to get Monica for. +RACHEL: Nono, I th I think this could be, y'know, it. +RACHEL: Now honey, you take care, Yeah, I know, I know, I know he does. +RACHEL: Ooo! +RACHEL: I just can’t deal with this just quite yet. +RACHEL: Exactly. +RACHEL: God, the first time he smiled, at me, those three seconds were more exciting than three weeks in Burmuda with Barry. +RACHEL: It was unbelievable! +RACHEL: Good morning! +RACHEL: I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again, Ross, no, you're, you're, you're making this too hard. +RACHEL: A whore. +RACHEL: That's true. +RACHEL: I mean, it doesn't even have to be a big relationship, y'know, just like a fling would be great. +RACHEL: Well… Umm, I got TiVo. +RACHEL: You've always hated my lamp, and then, all of a sudden, it's just magically broken? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: You are soooo enjoying this. +RACHEL: Yes, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: I don’t know, I’d leave it on the changing table? +RACHEL: Actually, we have to have one in five minutes, so everybody cancel your plans. +RACHEL: You told people that I was half and half! +RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Sure! +RACHEL: I love you Phoebe. +RACHEL: I got it! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: A detective? +RACHEL: Oh, thank God I can't hear a word that you're saying! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Well, I was thinking maybe a um, a romantic dinner with um, candles and wine and then uh, maybe going back to my place for um, dessert. +RACHEL: Yeah, umm, no honey. +RACHEL: What the hell is that? +RACHEL: This is so weird. +RACHEL: Rent! +RACHEL: Would you, please, just let me say goodnight to my daughter? +RACHEL: Come on wuss, make love to me. +RACHEL: Here's your lemonade. +RACHEL: Can you please, please take care of it for me? +RACHEL: Do you need the phone? +RACHEL: Ohh, okay. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Well, anyway, they make these great novelty cakes, in all different shapes, and if you give them a photo, they’ll copy it in icing! +RACHEL: Oh, right. +RACHEL: I’m funny? +RACHEL: Ross and I haven't dated in like, six years. +RACHEL: Joey. +RACHEL: You’re not the man who left the cell phone. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Who would, who would you marry? +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: It's not a baby! +RACHEL: It's okay! +RACHEL: Y’know, all the women. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Umm, all right, first thing I need you to do is go downstairs and find a women named Hilda and tell her to go home. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: But you’re just a kid! +RACHEL: Y'know, I've been meaning to talk to you about this whole, little, new European thing you got going on, and I just need to tell you that it makes me very uncomfortable and I just--y'know--stop it! +RACHEL: Oh, wow, Molly is just great! +RACHEL: She's almost in. +RACHEL: He was having sex with Amy Welch! +RACHEL: Oh screw her, that part is mine! +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: This place is really freaking me out. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Oh by the way, thank you for loaning us Pamela and Yasmine. +RACHEL: Oh honey, I'm so sorry, you were right, this feels great! +RACHEL: Ok. +RACHEL: I'm going upstairs. +RACHEL: I’m just kidding! +RACHEL: Ow, that had to hurt! +RACHEL: My God, so creamy. +RACHEL: Take it! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Y’know what Ben? +RACHEL: Hello Drake, I'm surprised to see you here. +RACHEL: Uh. +RACHEL: To umm, look at my books, y'know, see them a little better. +RACHEL: Well, you should be, this is all your fault! +RACHEL: Yeah, I can’t live with Joey once the baby comes. +RACHEL: It’s-it’s just a little hard to believe. +RACHEL: Alright, fine, you go ahead and you do that, alright Ross. +RACHEL: How was the beach? +RACHEL: Where are you going? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You’re a horny bitch! +RACHEL: You. +RACHEL: But I'm not sure, Chandler? +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I can think of no two people better prepared for the journey. +RACHEL: What you got there? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Hug it out! +RACHEL: She's at such a cute age. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: You can? +RACHEL: That's not the end. +RACHEL: Listen, I’m gettin’ something from your grandmother, she said that since you get to keep the one bedroom apartment you should give Rachel the purple chair? +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Ow ow ow. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Hey you guys. +RACHEL: Oh I found him. +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: Oh maybe we shouldn’t. +RACHEL: Ugh. +RACHEL: I realised that I was more turned on by this gravy boat than by Barry! +RACHEL: The wires have come loose in your head! +RACHEL: Oh, everything went great. +RACHEL: As I was saying. +RACHEL: Now, what exactly is in a cobb salad? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Emil, Whoa! +RACHEL: Oh Ross, you're so great. +RACHEL: Exactly! +RACHEL: I mean, no offense to you guys. +RACHEL: Yes, yes it is true. +RACHEL: Wow, you know, it's so beautiful out there. +RACHEL: I shouldn't have said anything! +RACHEL: I think Monica would be very interested to know that you called her cheesecake dry and mealy. +RACHEL: Ya know, Dr. Burke kissed me once. +RACHEL: Well yeah, but I mean, it was good scared though, you know? +RACHEL: Well, whaddya think? +RACHEL: You and me, alright? +RACHEL: Oh good you’re still here! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I don’t have any issues with my Father. +RACHEL: There was a really big guy that I was talking to, with the really nice breasts. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: We're just going to have to make our peace with that! +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Try under the bed, try under the bed! +RACHEL: Well, I feel fine, but I think you’re bumming out the rest of the kids. +RACHEL: Yeah, so? +RACHEL: Well, y’know, sometimes that helps. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: I am not going to tell you until I tell him. +RACHEL: I give up you guys, I don't know what I'm going to do with this thing! +RACHEL: I can’t. +RACHEL: I think the only thing that tops that was, was, was when I was in the eight grade and I had to sing the Copa Cabana in front of the entire school. +RACHEL: God, would you just calm down! +RACHEL: Yeah, I’m just mad! +RACHEL: Come on Ross! +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: I wrote that one as a joke for you! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Phoebe, come on! +RACHEL: It was just Tag. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: How did you leave it? +RACHEL: Yeah Melissa, I don’t want to be known as the uh, office bitch, but I will call your supervisor. +RACHEL: Nobody. +RACHEL: Oh god, Ross. +RACHEL: Ok! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Well yeah, but then I remembered I started it and there was this pep rally and I was, I was on top of the pyramid but anyway umm, what is this book about? +RACHEL: A cyborg?! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: So as a, as a compromise we decided first to get married, and then to eat a lot of grapes. +RACHEL: Isn't that amazing? +RACHEL: Ooh, I just wish we hadn't lost those four months, but if time was what you needed just to gain a little perspective. +RACHEL: Oh, you're not having fun, are you? +RACHEL: And cute! +RACHEL: Well, like anything can be sexy. +RACHEL: I am so jealous. +RACHEL: That's where that came from. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I'm very sorry. +RACHEL: How could this happen?! +RACHEL: No you guys… EHHHHHHHHHHH! +RACHEL: I didn’t! +RACHEL: That almost hit me in the face. +RACHEL: It’s not Christmas! +RACHEL: Yeah, oh my God, tomorrow! +RACHEL: OK, that's fine, read the Family Circus, enjoy the gentle comedy. +RACHEL: Oh, you-you mean your earrings? +RACHEL: Ooh, you guys, it starts in like 20 minutes. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: The smell is just yuck! +RACHEL: Thank you doctor. +RACHEL: Does it hurt? +RACHEL: And you look fantastic, although you missed a button. +RACHEL: Oh, Ross, don’t forget, we have that doctor’s appointment tomorrow! +RACHEL: leave. +RACHEL: Ok, ok, Roger was creepy, but he was nothing compared to Pete Carney. +RACHEL: Not Joey, no, I was just lusting after Chandler. +RACHEL: It's not a purse! +RACHEL: Okay, you just go on and make your little jokey-jokes, but if you do not know what you are doing out at sea you will die at sea. +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Excuse me? +RACHEL: I hate when Ross is right! +RACHEL: So do you have any questions for us? +RACHEL: Okay, okay, okay. +RACHEL: We just went over this! +RACHEL: You’re right. +RACHEL: Just tell me how. +RACHEL: Ok. See you, bye. +RACHEL: I just have to know one thing. +RACHEL: I don’t know. +RACHEL: Come on, we gotta go! +RACHEL: Oh hi, Mr. Wineburg, hi Mrs. Wineburg. +RACHEL: No, she’s—She was nice. +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Oh, in my head he's done some pretty not-gay-stuff! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Joey, you're so sweet. +RACHEL: Ugh, those bastards! +RACHEL: Have you ever rescued anyone from a burning building before? +RACHEL: He was really nice and he left because of you! +RACHEL: Oh, so everything's okay? +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Uh Ben, I can’t do it. +RACHEL: And you just get to be cool Aunt Phoebe! +RACHEL: Come on, Terry, I'll even clean the cappuccino machine. +RACHEL: Morning. +RACHEL: Really nice to meet you, and we'll call you. +RACHEL: Nothing. +RACHEL: Manhattan does not have enough stores. +RACHEL: You and that girl from that copy place, which yesterday you took full responsibility for! +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: One of them has great references and a lot of experience and then there’s this guy. +RACHEL: I mean, they’re gonna be engaged for like what? +RACHEL: Hey Joey, how'd the audition go? +RACHEL: Oh no, you guys, just stay here, I’m gonna go check her diaper, Pheebs you wanna come? +RACHEL: He's gone. +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: Alright thanks, oh Ross could you stop by the coffee house and get me a muffin? +RACHEL: Oh, okay! +RACHEL: Wow, I really get crabby when I cook. +RACHEL: Pheebs? +RACHEL: Oh please… No. +RACHEL: Okay, James. +RACHEL: Already? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Umm, this was the uh garter that I was saving for my wedding and I wanted it to be Monica’s something borrowed and it’s blue. +RACHEL: Have you been working out? +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: Now, if you will excuse me I am going to go and lie down. +RACHEL: She's right. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Do you even understand what off the rack means?! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: You always wanted to get married outside. +RACHEL: We’re not finished with the lesson yet. +RACHEL: I do not think about what our childrens' names are gonna be. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: And I’m one of them! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I know what this is all about. +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: Oh God, oh God, it's sowed on though. +RACHEL: You know you're not supposed to p. Whoa! +RACHEL: Okay, check this out. +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: I was just going to say that I left my keys. +RACHEL: Definitely! +RACHEL: Why didn't he call? +RACHEL: I tried! +RACHEL: Umm, unless you wanna come inside? +RACHEL: Come on, I don’t want you to feel like you can’t tell me things. +RACHEL: Well, you're not sixteen, you're both adults now. +RACHEL: Okay fine, y’know what? +RACHEL: You wouldn’t think that Annie Liebawitz would forget to put film in the camera. +RACHEL: You're kidding! +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Pheebs, I don’t think anyone's mad about that. +RACHEL: Well, y’know it’s just been so long since I’ve been to Chuckie Cheese. +RACHEL: What’d you get? +RACHEL: Umm. +RACHEL: I don't know all the words. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I wanna see the baby! +RACHEL: OH MY GOD! +RACHEL: I’m just gonna over. +RACHEL: You guys, does this look like something the girlfriend of a paleontologist would wear? +RACHEL: Yeah, that'd be great. +RACHEL: Phoebe, hi, we're so sorry. +RACHEL: Yeah, whoosh! +RACHEL: Oh yeah, go ahead. +RACHEL: You have not worn that T-shirt since you were 15! +RACHEL: You went on our honeymoon alone? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: It’s a trifle. +RACHEL: Is this Ross’s wedding invitation? +RACHEL: Oh, umm, okay, yeah, I'll be, yeah I'll be right back. +RACHEL: Now who’s a pushover? +RACHEL: You never come into this office again! +RACHEL: Thats it! +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh, I just thought of the greatest wedding gift to get you. +RACHEL: Well, that-that’s not your choice. +RACHEL: Oh.and I told my boss that someone made out with Ralph Lauren. +RACHEL: That s easy for you to say, you weren t almost just killed. +RACHEL: That sounds great! +RACHEL: Oh, what are you going to do?! +RACHEL: I really do. +RACHEL: Wow, this is so cool you guys, the entire city is blacked out. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You had to do it, didn't you? +RACHEL: I love this job! +RACHEL: Why, why not? +RACHEL: Watch. +RACHEL: You thing was so stupid anyway, this was ridiculous. +RACHEL: Uck! +RACHEL: It’s me! +RACHEL: Well I assume the ah, happy couple isn't up yet. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I’m not going to sleep with Ralph Lauren. +RACHEL: I think it could be kind of great! +RACHEL: Oh come on, I already went. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: And I. +RACHEL: Okay Phoebe calm down, there’s no need to place blame. +RACHEL: Y'know what? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: I still don’t know what the hell I’m doing! +RACHEL: That is good news, Ross! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Noo, no, I'm not mad at him, I'm, I'm not really anything at him anymore. +RACHEL: Yeah, we are definitely on Route 27. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Oh my god, oh, you guys are great. +RACHEL: Ok, fine! +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Okay then! +RACHEL: How would you like to sit in a chair that fully reclines, has a rolling massage, and speakers in the head rest? +RACHEL: You look like you slept with a hanger in your mouth. +RACHEL: Dessert? +RACHEL: My God, what are you doing here? +RACHEL: Why not? +RACHEL: Yeah, we ended up spending the day together and had such a great time! +RACHEL: I cannot believe I’m gonna meet Jessica Ashley! +RACHEL: Get out! +RACHEL: So now, what exactly is the point of the box? +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Oh please. +RACHEL: Oh yes! +RACHEL: My name. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: I mean that ain’t a pretty picture in the morning, y’know what I mean. +RACHEL: Well, you don't! +RACHEL: Oh-oh Professor Geller. +RACHEL: I don't know, I don't know. +RACHEL: I mean, it'll be fine, I really think it'll be fine, I really do. +RACHEL: With the blood and the screaming and the little present that's shooting out of her!? +RACHEL: Love to love ya baby! +RACHEL: Do you think—Could you tell me if she’s hanging in, in a one bedroom or a two? +RACHEL: Hit me. +RACHEL: Yeah, well that's how mad I am! +RACHEL: Oh, honey, you know, I once also almost married somebody that I didn’t love. +RACHEL: Wooh! +RACHEL: Ahhhh, you brought rats to my birthday party? +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: OH MY GOD! +RACHEL: What is that noise? +RACHEL: I mean y'know, I'm thinking. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: I just, I kept trying to make you a better person, but you're, you're already a pretty perfect version of what you are. +RACHEL: Monica, let it go. +RACHEL: Okay, a couple months late on the lecture, Ross. +RACHEL: Oh my God you’re amazing! +RACHEL: Oh, sure! +RACHEL: Oh no, I can’t. +RACHEL: There's a party. +RACHEL: Could you please get her attention? +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, well hey, welcome to our sauna. +RACHEL: One more thing umm, do-do we still need to uh settle the question of us? +RACHEL: Oh wow! +RACHEL: Um, excuse me, everyone. +RACHEL: No, IIII don't, I actually don't know who I'm talking about! +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: Aw, it’s unbelievable! +RACHEL: How?! +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Okay, look it's about me and. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Honey, are you sure you’re not talking about your imaginary boyfriend. +RACHEL: We’re having a girl! +RACHEL: Score! +RACHEL: Just, if it's possible, could you leave him somewhere and go have sex with another guy? +RACHEL: We actually thought we were a little too mature for stuff like that. +RACHEL: Ow ow ow. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: What's it the anniversary of? +RACHEL: You're right, you're right. +RACHEL: Hey how uh, how serious are you about keeping Ben in your life? +RACHEL: So honey, what are you gonna do about the little girl? +RACHEL: I’ll need a year and a half to plan the wedding, and I’d like to know the guy for a year, year and a half before we get engaged… Which means I need to meet the guy by the time I’m thirty. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Nothing. +RACHEL: OK, that's dead right? +RACHEL: I promise. +RACHEL: Okay, I m sorry. +RACHEL: Op! +RACHEL: Okay, as everybody has ordered, I would like to start the celebration and make a toast, to Phoebe. +RACHEL: You gave them to me! +RACHEL: I wanna hear everything! +RACHEL: No, of course not. +RACHEL: Maybe a margarita? +RACHEL: Well, yeah! +RACHEL: Bye! +RACHEL: Yes, yes, Bombay is bery, bery nice this time of year. +RACHEL: The city’s full! +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: And thank you for giving it to me. +RACHEL: Y’know. +RACHEL: We're waiting for you to open the door. +RACHEL: Oh, hello, Mr. Zelner. +RACHEL: Because rumour has it you guys shut the drapes! +RACHEL: Just a bug. +RACHEL: Momma’s Little Bakery, Chicago, Illinois. +RACHEL: A scooter! +RACHEL: Show cat! +RACHEL: It s a little old but. +RACHEL: Oh thanks, but listen, I was just at Monica’s and she and Chandler had a big fight and they’re not moving in. +RACHEL: Ross, you guys went out once. +RACHEL: Now wait a minute, I’ve got one more thing I have to say to you…oh right! +RACHEL: Yeah, and-and-and by someone, she means Joey. +RACHEL: I mean he is a doctor, you don't expect doctors to get sick! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: I never get picked! +RACHEL: Ok, I, I will do your laundry for one month. +RACHEL: Wow, I don't know if I could ever do that. +RACHEL: I just don’t know! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: You’re back from your date! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Why don't we just do it another night? +RACHEL: Well, when we first met, you know, I thought you were pompous and arrogant and obnoxious. +RACHEL: Why can't your son just play with his doll? +RACHEL: There's been a teeny-teeny change in plans. +RACHEL: You're right. +RACHEL: I mean, this is just beautiful! +RACHEL: See, Gavin, you're capable of being a nice guy. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Oh you did, there are twenty in here. +RACHEL: You can, ooh, you can get one of those little hats and have people call you captain, and then when you’re old, Cappy. +RACHEL: SSSHHHHTTT! +RACHEL: There. +RACHEL: No-no-no. +RACHEL: No-no, I bought those. +RACHEL: Don't make me go long. +RACHEL: Joey, it says Best Supporting Actress! +RACHEL: OK Julie, so now let's start with your childhood, what was that like? +RACHEL: You-you're not wearing a jacket. +RACHEL: All right, well that's good to know. +RACHEL: Oh, I uh sold Mrs. Whiskerson. +RACHEL: Well, I like you less! +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: I saw her! +RACHEL: What do you mean? +RACHEL: Oh, gosh, it's hot in here. +RACHEL: I’m not asking you to go on a date with him! +RACHEL: Ha! +RACHEL: OK. +RACHEL: But I am going hunting! +RACHEL: Why do you have. +RACHEL: We should play that game where everyone says one thing that they're thankful for. +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Y’know I can’t even worry about that right now, cause I got the cutie little baby, oh I can’t believe how much I love her, I can’t get enough of her, like right now I miss her. +RACHEL: Because you do. +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Joshua! +RACHEL: What’s he gonna do now? +RACHEL: I did not see the fish! +RACHEL: It’s gotta be rough. +RACHEL: How did we end up with these jerks? +RACHEL: Joey, just ignore the boats all right? +RACHEL: Okay, no uterus, no opinion. +RACHEL: But y'know, I never really had anything to worry about. +RACHEL: You don't have any secrets! +RACHEL: Oh, Ross. +RACHEL: I don’t want my child’s first words to be, How you doin’? +RACHEL: I mean, do you think you can ever have both? +RACHEL: If she finds out that I lied to her, she is going to hate me even more. +RACHEL: Come on apartment! +RACHEL: Ya know, in crazy world, that means you're married. +RACHEL: Motion pictures. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: No, why do we always have to do everything according to your time table? +RACHEL: Awful, absolutely awful. +RACHEL: I’m gonna check my messages. +RACHEL: Okay, that's what I'm gonna do. +RACHEL: How do you expect me to grow if you won't let me blow? +RACHEL: Wh-what?! +RACHEL: Ehhumm, I don't know, why don't you taste it. +RACHEL: And it wouldn’t be a secret, and we wouldn’t have our wedding dinner at Pizza Hut. +RACHEL: Why?! +RACHEL: He remembered. +RACHEL: Then we took a walk down to Bendall's, and I told him not. +RACHEL: Oh, that is so tacky. +RACHEL: Oh thank you! +RACHEL: These are for you. +RACHEL: Made in Mexico! +RACHEL: Well, I'm very impressed. +RACHEL: Oh, no, no no. +RACHEL: Oh, Ross. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Oh, you guys are gonna have so much fun! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: She has no where else to go, and she's my sister. +RACHEL: Ooh, and it's so nice having this little sink here. +RACHEL: Why didn't you come up? +RACHEL: That's Phoebe. +RACHEL: Anyway, umm. +RACHEL: Oh, Pheebs! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: No reason. +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Yeah, umm, you left me a message. +RACHEL: You know I actually came in here hoping to have a mature conversation with you. +RACHEL: But you know what, you know what the good news is? +RACHEL: Now, you do realize that she's a cartoon, and way out of your league? +RACHEL: Chandler, don't worry! +RACHEL: Uh-huh, I guess it is pretty big news. +RACHEL: Just leave me a message and tell me where to meet you. +RACHEL: Sit! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: That’s so sweet of you! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Ohh, are you setting Ross up with someone? +RACHEL: Allright, he is the last person I want to see. +RACHEL: Okay, look, Ross, I realise that my Father is difficult, but that's why you have got to be the bigger man here. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: So what, you all just joined together to hate me?! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Ok. Look uhh, Mon I'm, I'm really sorry. +RACHEL: You have to stay, we-we got the whole big thing planned! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Well, I guess there's no use to me sticking around 'til the end of the day! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Okay, well then how about a handshake? +RACHEL: No, there is no Rachel Greep, but then this other girl overheard us and she was all, I'm Rachel Greep! +RACHEL: Everything that I need is in here and my travel documents are on the counter organized in the order that I will be needing them. +RACHEL: I mean, maybe you were on the right track with this whole, you know, spontaneous thing. +RACHEL: It just doesn’t feel right. +RACHEL: Okay, whenever you’re ready. +RACHEL: Okay, just sweep it. +RACHEL: What about you and your consummated like bunnies nonsense! +RACHEL: Well, umm. +RACHEL: If I’m your maid of honor that means you are Monica’s. +RACHEL: No, it was just the three of us. +RACHEL: Joey? +RACHEL: Oh, uh, wait a minute, y'know what? +RACHEL: I promise. +RACHEL: I just helped an 81 year old woman put on a thong and she didn’t even buy it! +RACHEL: And it is a big deal! +RACHEL: And if you bring in one woman and she has her baby before me I’m going to sue you! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: No not that. +RACHEL: Well, for your information, Paolo is gonna be in Rome this New Year, so I'll be just as pathetic as the rest of you. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Hur hur hur. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Then why do you ask?! +RACHEL: Monica, what are you doing? +RACHEL: You said she was bald! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Yeah, remember that thing I told you that happened yesterday? +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Oh, what is wrong with me lately? +RACHEL: I'm sorry, let her? +RACHEL: I think I’m gonna stay here. +RACHEL: Gavin. +RACHEL: I actually changed my mind about the name. +RACHEL: My idea of a vacation does not involve something sucking on my nipples until they are raw. +RACHEL: You didn’t break up with that fireman? +RACHEL: One time he caught me smoking he said if he ever saw me doing that again he’d make me eat the entire pack. +RACHEL: Well, for starters I would've said the right name at my wedding! +RACHEL: All right Dina, well let’s talk about the different areas of fashion that you could get involved in. +RACHEL: Do you know something? +RACHEL: Absolutely. +RACHEL: That wig all in disarray, and boobs flung over the night stand, y'know. +RACHEL: Yeah, you know, was I looking forward to going to Paris? +RACHEL: It's just such a magical time! +RACHEL: I’llI’ll just tell her it’s an antique apothecary table, she doesn’t have to know where it came from. +RACHEL: Op, look! +RACHEL: Look you guys, I have to go, I'm the Maid-ofHonor. +RACHEL: Well, actually Gunther sent me. +RACHEL: I don’t care how long ago it was! +RACHEL: Hello. +RACHEL: were you this irritating? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: No, I’m fine. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Doctor you gotta do something! +RACHEL: I didn’t mean to do that! +RACHEL: Who'd you have lunch with? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: That’ll be all. +RACHEL: We’re the Cobras! +RACHEL: Umm, you-you and your sister seem to have umm, a very special bond, and. +RACHEL: Monica, your dad just beeped in, but can you make it quick? +RACHEL: Yeah, you got like 14 hours until she has to be at the airport, and you’re sitting here in the hallway with a 28-year-old cheerleader with a fat lip. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: And fifty. +RACHEL: I wanna meet this guy who's the best sex she ever had! +RACHEL: Great, people having sex, that's just what I need to see. +RACHEL: I think I’m falling in love with you all over again. +RACHEL: Just remember gal pal Rachel Green. +RACHEL: I'll get the hat. +RACHEL: Well, why I told him it's haunted. +RACHEL: I mean, I think we are working, I think we are clicking. +RACHEL: I did. +RACHEL: What happened to you? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, I'm not, I'm not hungry. +RACHEL: No one! +RACHEL: But, I guess that's normal? +RACHEL: And, you know, ya see there I'm thinking of names so obviously, I am over you. +RACHEL: You guys! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Now I want to steal your thunder! +RACHEL: Right? +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: II got a job. +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: That helps a lot. +RACHEL: Well, y'know, the reason I didn't wanna go running with you is because um, well y'know the way that you run is a little. +RACHEL: I had it. +RACHEL: Nothing! +RACHEL: Excuse me? +RACHEL: Oh, it’s so easy for you I mean, you’re not married, you get to have sex with who ever you want! +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: I cannot, I cannot believe that I invited you here today. +RACHEL: Hi you guys. +RACHEL: Let's just say my Curious George doll is no longer curious. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Y'know what, just give me a second and I'll be out of your hair. +RACHEL: All right, look. +RACHEL: M. Marcel? +RACHEL: Oh thank you for being so nice and calm. +RACHEL: No, no, no, I admire a man who can cry. +RACHEL: And do you remember going into my purse and stealing the phone?! +RACHEL: Take 'em! +RACHEL: Honey don’t worry, it was my mistake. +RACHEL: Are ah, having dinner with my Dad tomorrow night, I hope that's okay. +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah. +RACHEL: Well, I've been up since six. +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, I’m sorry. +RACHEL: My first call. +RACHEL: Um, I got a question for you guys. +RACHEL: You brought a carrot?! +RACHEL: You know what, I was, I was actually just checking to, see, if I could run. +RACHEL: No, I’ve just always wanted to do that. +RACHEL: I’d love that. +RACHEL: An extra ticket. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Call her! +RACHEL: Oh no-no-no-no-no, no you don’t! +RACHEL: Somebody else tell me, somebody tell me. +RACHEL: Well, where is he? +RACHEL: That, no, it's perfect. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Phoebe, you have to calm down. +RACHEL: And stop saying that! +RACHEL: I might as well make some money out it! +RACHEL: Okay, well this is, this is what you’re gonna do. +RACHEL: You know, we're gonna be all like oh everybody, let's take our helicopters up to the cape and you're gonna be all like oh, I can't guys, I'll meet you guys up there, I gotta gas up the Hyundai. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: This is what I'm doing now. +RACHEL: I do not have chubby ankles! +RACHEL: Monica, you don't get it. +RACHEL: What the hell is that? +RACHEL: I didn t. I never said that. +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah and you know what, I know she's gonna wanna run again, I just don't know how to get out of it, I mean, I live with her. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: At dusk. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Okay what’s up? +RACHEL: I'm just gonna deal with it, I'm just gonna deal with it. +RACHEL: Umm, oh here—Do you want a good one? +RACHEL: We, we, we were just. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Do you think it's possible for two friends to fool around and, and not have it be a big deal? +RACHEL: Pheebs, I was wondering. +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: But just a little one. +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: I don't know, I just kinda ran into him last night. +RACHEL: Monica, your Sweet Sixteen was like a million years ago. +RACHEL: Okay, you're coming with me, and I also told them that if we're still here when they get off that we'll go down to the cafeteria and have some JellO with them. +RACHEL: Um, you were not the only one there. +RACHEL: I completely ruined your evening. +RACHEL: Ok, great, because I gotta get out of here, the smell of beets is killing me! +RACHEL: You then fall for me and I again, somehow, get clobbered. +RACHEL: You guys! +RACHEL: So were done then! +RACHEL: Drag me down. +RACHEL: Me too! +RACHEL: Cats, how long do they live figuring you don't, you know, throw 'em under a bus or something? +RACHEL: Everything’s ruined. +RACHEL: Sorry! +RACHEL: Mon, honey you’re not dying. +RACHEL: Mmm hmm. +RACHEL: Oh no no no no. +RACHEL: What, no, no, no, mine are deceptively small I mean, III actually sometimes, st-stuff my bra. +RACHEL: ROSS: Knock-knock. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Y'know what I mean? +RACHEL: Wh, Ross what do you want from me? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh, please don’t get married before I do. +RACHEL: Who got married?! +RACHEL: Ohh, you've waited soo long. +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Do you-do you have a problem with me? +RACHEL: I mean, I’m not gonna ask him for anything. +RACHEL: Maybe he knows where Ross is. +RACHEL: OH! +RACHEL: This is just what I wanted. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Good doggie get the sandwich, get the ok, Joey, the dog will lick himself but he will not touch your sandwich, what does that say? +RACHEL: Thanksgiving, Christmas. +RACHEL: Run Phoebe run. +RACHEL: A lot of memories in here, a lot of memories. +RACHEL: Hell yes! +RACHEL: It just means that once again we can't. +RACHEL: But y’know what? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: God! +RACHEL: Um, hi. +RACHEL: I’m just moving out. +RACHEL: Like if I would strike up a conversation about say umm, sandwiches. +RACHEL: I might know something too. +RACHEL: Oh-ho, my God! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: I can do that. +RACHEL: How do you know that? +RACHEL: Oh please, I hate packing, it’s closer to work, and we do have fun. +RACHEL: Get outta here! +RACHEL: You know. +RACHEL: I don't want to be with them either, but it's Thanksgiving and we should not want to be together, together. +RACHEL: Yep! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Hey Phoebs, whatcha got there? +RACHEL: Okay, Ross, I'm really trying to tell you something here. +RACHEL: I'm still on the first chapter. +RACHEL: I know, it's amazing. +RACHEL: It would be so bad if she heard! +RACHEL: Well, I gotta get, I gotta get back to the dishes. +RACHEL: Well, my eye is a little itchy. +RACHEL: Terry is a jerk, ok? +RACHEL: Nothing. +RACHEL: Who's Danny? +RACHEL: Melissa! +RACHEL: Yes, I would love that, oh, that is soo sweet, Joey. +RACHEL: She has the drugs! +RACHEL: Really!? +RACHEL: Down at the docks again? +RACHEL: What about you, Joe? +RACHEL: Oh, I am so sorry. +RACHEL: Oh, I'm just sorry I'm not gonna be around to watch you two attempt to handle this! +RACHEL: I mean if you think about it, I mean Ross did learn something from each marriage. +RACHEL: Honey, someday you are gonna make some man the luckiest guy in the world. +RACHEL: But can it, just, happen a little bit? +RACHEL: Oh, please, Monica. +RACHEL: I mean, don't do that. +RACHEL: Well I've had it. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: It's so nice to finally be in a fun relationship, y'know? +RACHEL: No you don’t! +RACHEL: Yeah that seems fair. +RACHEL: Phoebe, I bet somebody's missing that badge. +RACHEL: Well maybe she and her friends are just having a contest to see who can bring home the biggest geek. +RACHEL: I mean, I'll just go and talk to Monica and get an ETA on the pee-pee's! +RACHEL: Ahhh! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Bad monkey! +RACHEL: Rachel Green. +RACHEL: Maybe I’ll just call him to see if he’s actually seen her. +RACHEL: Look how pretty! +RACHEL: Joey, you never, you never talked about that before. +RACHEL: Sophie sit! +RACHEL: I was thinking if it’s a girl, how about Sandrine? +RACHEL: How can I kiss him and not letting him know that I like him? +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: We were at Ugly Naked Guy's apartment and we saw them doing it through the window. +RACHEL: She spi. +RACHEL: Nothing! +RACHEL: And Mrs?! +RACHEL: So how-how ‘bout you, are-are you seeing anybody? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: That was kind of rude! +RACHEL: I can't believe Mark didn't call. +RACHEL: Aw, thanks! +RACHEL: Oh Pheebs, is that a new ankle bracelet? +RACHEL: If you've got enough life jackets! +RACHEL: I’ll go! +RACHEL: How do you know Monica? +RACHEL: Oh, thank you for doing that. +RACHEL: Are you kidding?! +RACHEL: I don’t know. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Did you talk to him? +RACHEL: So don't move, okay? +RACHEL: Is there room on that step for a pathetic loser? +RACHEL: Happy for you. +RACHEL: That’s fine. +RACHEL: Y’know, I mean, but I mean it just feels right! +RACHEL: Hi, it-it's Rachel. +RACHEL: I think he’s trying to mouth something to me, but I can’t make it out. +RACHEL: It was very, very nice to meet you sir-Ow! +RACHEL: Oh, I’m fine. +RACHEL: Hello. +RACHEL: I mean, I could, but I wouldn’t. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: See you in the parking lot. +RACHEL: Joey, I gotta tell ya, I've been thinking all day about that scene you did, I mean, you were amazing! +RACHEL: Oh, look, wish me luck! +RACHEL: Yeah, this is she. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Can I see it? +RACHEL: Okay, see? +RACHEL: Oh, no problem. +RACHEL: Do you? +RACHEL: Do you wanna see the list? +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: That'll be 2,000. +RACHEL: Last night. +RACHEL: Hey Pheebs. +RACHEL: Sure, is she married? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: But my work it's-it's for me y'know, I'm out there, on my own, and I'm doing it and it's scary but I love it, because it's mine. +RACHEL: When does Liz’s father get here? +RACHEL: Shh. +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: Yeah, that's true. +RACHEL: You just saved me! +RACHEL: I did, Monica was so sweet she left a little mint on my pillow. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Wait. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Eh! +RACHEL: No, no, no, I'm looking at a purchase order right here and it clearly states that we ordered the Rivera bikini in a variety of sizes and colours. +RACHEL: Oh, ah nothin'. +RACHEL: Ohh, I like swimmer's bodies! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: So were you guys together a long time? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: It's not your fault. +RACHEL: He's gonna kill me. +RACHEL: Virgo? +RACHEL: Foot rubs for a month! +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Do you know that feeling when you’re trying to blow a Saint Bernard out your ass? +RACHEL: Was she good? +RACHEL: I’m gonna have a baby. +RACHEL: I pick a card! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Ohhh, this is the least jealous I’ve ever been! +RACHEL: Come on, it's not like I'm asking for this girly clock or anything, which, by the way, I also think is really cool. +RACHEL: Yeah, but I’m pretty sure he’s gay. +RACHEL: Honey, I would love for you to go with me. +RACHEL: Or a or a hat! +RACHEL: What can I do for you Joshua? +RACHEL: Paul. +RACHEL: It’s-it’s that I’m—Here I am about to pop and he’s out picking up some shop girl at Sluts ‘R’ Us! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Not right now. +RACHEL: We have to fix this! +RACHEL: Well, isn't that gonna be weird? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Oh my god. +RACHEL: Hey, I was doin' great before I found out about you. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: And there's nobody to hug! +RACHEL: All right, then you owe me 350. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: A…man…duh! +RACHEL: I'll split them up! +RACHEL: Its still there! +RACHEL: Oh yes, it’s me! +RACHEL: Y'know I can’t believe I even thought about getting back together again! +RACHEL: She’s going to live with us for eight weeks. +RACHEL: You’re welcome. +RACHEL: So just bring it back downstairs, what’s the problem? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: They were like this! +RACHEL: Mmh-mmh! +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Why aren't you at Gary's? +RACHEL: It went great. +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: Thanks. +RACHEL: Do I know anything about babies? +RACHEL: I’m sorry, what? +RACHEL: You know, actually it's more like, hi. +RACHEL: Shake that nasty butt. +RACHEL: Oh thank you, Chandler, this is so great, she’s gonna love me. +RACHEL: Look, Ross, if you want your neighbors to like you, why don't you just pay the hundred bucks? +RACHEL: Did you shop?! +RACHEL: Well that too. +RACHEL: Oh, this is just terrible. +RACHEL: And you know why, because I make very bad decisions. +RACHEL: It’s French. +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: OK. +RACHEL: Ooy. +RACHEL: I’m sorry, I can’t! +RACHEL: So, making things. +RACHEL: I don’t care, as long as my mom’s here. +RACHEL: I’m just. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: I’m just thinking about Phoebe poor knocked up Phoebe. +RACHEL: Good thing Chandler’s not here, he always wins at this game. +RACHEL: How is you drinking helping the kids? +RACHEL: But don't be sexy. +RACHEL: You're right. +RACHEL: At least he bought me something with it! +RACHEL: Yeah but, maybe it’s not what we think. +RACHEL: I’m sorry Joey. +RACHEL: All right, well the place was closed. +RACHEL: No, no don’t get mad because look, this is what happened. +RACHEL: Let's all quit! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I watched! +RACHEL: I’m not moving! +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Uhm, I have some goodbye stuff that I wanted to say to each of you and I was gonna save it until the end of the night, but come here. +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: What are you gonna do? +RACHEL: Anyway y’know what, the point is Tag, start looking because you are going to find those contracts on your desk. +RACHEL: Oh my God, I can’t believe this, all this time, I liked you and you liked me! +RACHEL: I can’t believe they didn’t put it in the part where you said you didn’t watch soap operas. +RACHEL: The hiring committee is meeting people all day and. +RACHEL: You fell asleep?! +RACHEL: I am? +RACHEL: Well, you ripped the paper out of the court reporter’s machine! +RACHEL: Oh, I have to go pee. +RACHEL: Hi, how's my girl? +RACHEL: God, I'm not lame, okay. +RACHEL: Yeah, it is! +RACHEL: You’re not invited to lunch. +RACHEL: Do you remember Barry? +RACHEL: You know, that's your call! +RACHEL: I should've never gone to London, and from now on you make all of my decisions for me. +RACHEL: Wh—Phoebe! +RACHEL: I don’t know what to do. +RACHEL: Uh yes, heroin and crack. +RACHEL: Oh, I know. +RACHEL: Does she have a wedding dress? +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: Oh, I seriously can’t stop it. +RACHEL: It's because you mean more to me. +RACHEL: Oh-oh, you lie. +RACHEL: Oh no, Baby Girl GellerGreen. +RACHEL: My boss, Joanna? +RACHEL: So you guys go, have a really good time. +RACHEL: Wow, y'know if Joey and Chandler walked in right now, we could make a fortune! +RACHEL: No, just some milk would be good Carol. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Hi, there you are, I’ve been looking for you everywhere! +RACHEL: Yeah, well, I gotta work, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: I mean I was in there just listening to them bitch about each other and all I kept thinking about was the fourth of July. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: What's that? +RACHEL: Yeah, I guess Gunther is kinda. +RACHEL: Is my hook unhooked? +RACHEL: And that crazy party animal will be your brother-in-law. +RACHEL: And I hope Barry doesn't kill you and eat you in Aruba. +RACHEL: A lover? +RACHEL: Oh, well. +RACHEL: It’s one more thing in my life that’s suddenly completely different. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I mean it’s like every guy I see—I mean look here. +RACHEL: She is so cute! +RACHEL: Oh, with the mother, just, just constantly tell her how amazing. +RACHEL: Look at that guy for example, I mean normally that’s not someone I would-would be attracted to, but right now, with the way I’m feeling, all I want to do is rip off his sweatpants and fanny pack. +RACHEL: Y'know II feel that we don't talk anymore. +RACHEL: Am I getting through to you sailor?! +RACHEL: Look, um, I think we should talk about what happened on the terrace. +RACHEL: Well tell us! +RACHEL: Phoebe, we can’t, we just can’t just let it happen! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Ross has a PhD. +RACHEL: Now, you’re going to make yourself watch the whole thing. +RACHEL: Then how come all your stuff is in this box?! +RACHEL: Oh, oh, that's what you're talking about. +RACHEL: Oh wait no. +RACHEL: Uhh, hello? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: God. +RACHEL: Hey Phoebs, how'd it go with Scott last night? +RACHEL: Sometimes just nodding is ok. Uhm, so but anyway, listen, not marrying Barry was the best decision that I ever, ever made. +RACHEL: Vogue! +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: What are these? +RACHEL: And that makes you angry because. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Yes, you do. +RACHEL: And all these people actually died? +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: My boss is hosting this charity event for underprivileged kids and the more people I bring, the better I look. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Thanks. +RACHEL: A bit of a puzzle. +RACHEL: Okay, well, we won that one. +RACHEL: Ok ok, somebody somebody. +RACHEL: What's this. +RACHEL: Emma, that's right! +RACHEL: Joey. +RACHEL: Umm, umm, okay, uh. +RACHEL: I’m serious! +RACHEL: What is up with Miss Hawaiian Tropic? +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh really? +RACHEL: Hmm-hmm. +RACHEL: 30 seconds, okay. +RACHEL: Oh, if she jumps, I get her tickets. +RACHEL: Oh yeah. +RACHEL: That’s not Phoebe that is Ursula! +RACHEL: You guys are never going to believe this. +RACHEL: Hey Ross! +RACHEL: Remember how we talked about the port side? +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Yeah, he did! +RACHEL: Richard? +RACHEL: If neither of you are married by the time you’re 40, you’re gonna marry Joey. +RACHEL: I will try to tone it down and uh stop yelling. +RACHEL: Well, hey! +RACHEL: Ohhhhh, don't be mad. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Noooo! +RACHEL: I’ll come back to that set! +RACHEL: What are you doing? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh no! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Ok. Aha! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: But it-it died, because my cat ate it. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah. +RACHEL: I mean, god, you just come in here, and drop this bomb on me, before you even tell Daddy. +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: Well, I'm sorry I went out with him when I knew you liked him. +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: Come on, she broke up with Richard because he didn't want to have babies. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Could I get some peanuts? +RACHEL: I don't wanna stand in the way of true love or anything, but I think a canelope might hurt less. +RACHEL: Mazel Tov! +RACHEL: Um, has uh Dr. Franzblau been by? +RACHEL: I mean, Joey Tribbiani! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Ah, all right. +RACHEL: You know what you should do? +RACHEL: Wait-wait! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I don't know, listen, I don't know what's going on here but let's. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: No, I don't want you to buy me a hat, I'm saying that I am a ha It's a metaphor, Daddy! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Why?! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Ugh, I knew it! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh my God, I gotta go to work! +RACHEL: II came over here to-to borrow this lamp. +RACHEL: Aww, this sucks! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Well, I was actually. +RACHEL: Ugh. +RACHEL: No you don’t. +RACHEL: I need to tell you something. +RACHEL: Ohh, OK, OK, OK, well, basically, lately, I've uh, I've uh, sort of had feelings for you. +RACHEL: Alright, she's Emma's aunt. +RACHEL: Yeah, I don’t think so Joe. +RACHEL: Any regrets? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: OK, OK, I checked, we have Earl Grey, English Breakfast, Cinnamon Stick, Camomile, Mint Medley, Blackberry, and er, oh wait, there was one more, erm, Lemon Soother! +RACHEL: Why does it matter so much to you?! +RACHEL: Just casually strewn about in that reckless haphazard manner? +RACHEL: Mexico? +RACHEL: Do you want to watch the rest of the movie with me? +RACHEL: I’d love to! +RACHEL: Morgan! +RACHEL: Heard what? +RACHEL: Alright. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Oh, did you beat him at a board game? +RACHEL: I just felt it and I went into Joey’s room and he was sleeping. +RACHEL: Oh honey, but it is just about. +RACHEL: Wow, Ikea, what a rich culture. +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: Ohh. +RACHEL: What in heaven’s name are you doing here? +RACHEL: It’s you. +RACHEL: Yeah, just so weird seeing him like that, you know? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: You kept count?! +RACHEL: This is silly, I’m gonna see you in a couple of hours! +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Ross, I am trying to help her become a better person. +RACHEL: We will do all of those. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Listen, can we please have lunch the next time I’m in the city? +RACHEL: Noo! +RACHEL: Excuse me. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: I uh, I have two tickets to the Knicks game tonight if you're interested, just as a thank you for this week. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Yeah, I just have to get dressed. +RACHEL: With us, it's never off the table. +RACHEL: Ross? +RACHEL: Wish me luck! +RACHEL: Oh, it's just. +RACHEL: Okay, let me just get a cup of coffee. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: That just means it's working. +RACHEL: What did, what did he say? +RACHEL: See you. +RACHEL: Yes you did! +RACHEL: C’mon, seriously, you guys, you’re not going to make me watch this alone! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Seriously Pheebs, it's not gonna be that kind of a party. +RACHEL: Oh, Monica made me send her to my mother's. +RACHEL: What are you saying? +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You let Joey drive it?! +RACHEL: So come on, she’s gonna be here any second! +RACHEL: I will behave! +RACHEL: Blow it. +RACHEL: Well, I don’t know about that, but some said that I looked like a floating angel. +RACHEL: So, Oh well, no I, I'll get her. +RACHEL: No there's gotta be something else that you can do. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Honey, you got a little thing on your. +RACHEL: Oh no. +RACHEL: Okay, honey, what he means by that, is while this is a very nice gift, maybe it's just not something a boyfriend gives? +RACHEL: I’m sorry honey, what were you saying? +RACHEL: No, I have all of the good words. +RACHEL: Well, I didn't see Joshua last night, but I did punch a girl in the face. +RACHEL: By all means. +RACHEL: Well, y’know II don’t know where he is. +RACHEL: Ugh, you will not believe what that sleaze-ball from Ralph Lauren did too me! +RACHEL: Well, I gotta get up early and it’s almost seven o’clock. +RACHEL: You're not asking me, are you? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I still don’t get it. +RACHEL: Too slow! +RACHEL: They're waiting for me, Ross. +RACHEL: I can’t watch! +RACHEL: Yeah, you know what we should all do? +RACHEL: That’s what makes it so easy for me to be 80 happy for Monica and Chandler! +RACHEL: Well, when we’re at the door, I lightly press my lips against his, and then move into his body just for a second, and then I make this sound, Hmmm. +RACHEL: Thank you very much, it was excellent. +RACHEL: I have a friend who is a masseuse. +RACHEL: Listen y’know what sir? +RACHEL: A thousand bucks. +RACHEL: Hey sailor. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: I yeah. +RACHEL: That is the most ridiculous. +RACHEL: Any chance you think the couch looks good there? +RACHEL: He didn't have a last name. +RACHEL: Why do they have to become people? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: This is actually the smell of success. +RACHEL: Let’s do it! +RACHEL: Oh, she sounded really. +RACHEL: Look Monica, getting cold feet is very common. +RACHEL: Not easy. +RACHEL: So I go have a baby and they send some guy in to do my job? +RACHEL: Only 98.50 to go. +RACHEL: You know what your nickname is, Mr. Big. +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: I'm sorry, what? +RACHEL: So I hear the Ralph Lauren fooled around with someone in the copy room. +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Oh, oh, this is good, this is really good. +RACHEL: You may need to use this year to teach Ben about Phoebe. +RACHEL: Honey, just the fact that you want me here to support you, I'm. +RACHEL: Yeah I know, and I bet you thought it would be weird. +RACHEL: I'm gonna make you a cup of tea and we're gonna talk this thing whole out. +RACHEL: Okay, you guys, just relax. +RACHEL: Well just ask Mona to give it back! +RACHEL: Fine! +RACHEL: Maybe this is about escaping stuff. +RACHEL: Well unless you pushed a desk out of your vagina, shakes not the same thing. +RACHEL: Yeah, okay, at ease solider! +RACHEL: We are here one hundred per cent and we love you and we are ready to start your birthday celebration. +RACHEL: Dina. +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: You stop looking for him. +RACHEL: In a couple of years we get to turn into them. +RACHEL: Emily? +RACHEL: Sucker! +RACHEL: Remember that thing that's been dead for a gazillion years. +RACHEL: Chandler, what is the matter with you?! +RACHEL: Well, that is a good idea! +RACHEL: All right, I’ll see you guys later. +RACHEL: We're gonna be okay. +RACHEL: See Pheebs, I promised you no one would die, didn't I? +RACHEL: Oh we just put her down for a nap. +RACHEL: Okay, Ross, do you really want to get back into that? +RACHEL: Barry? +RACHEL: No, it was on the house, it was, it was a newlywed special. +RACHEL: Hey, so did everything go okay with the annulment? +RACHEL: I feel. +RACHEL: I mean, you live alone, you don't walk around naked. +RACHEL: So c'mon, you guys, tell me all the dirt! +RACHEL: Y’know, start the heeling process? +RACHEL: Well honey, then why don't you break up with one of them? +RACHEL: I can do that. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: I can't hear it again. +RACHEL: Spoon. +RACHEL: So, when are we gettin’ back out on the water matey? +RACHEL: How about you guys? +RACHEL: Joey, would you mind giving me and Ross a hand moving his couch? +RACHEL: And uh, the best part though, when the uh, waiter spilled water down my back, I jumped up, and my boob popped out. +RACHEL: There's no room under the bed. +RACHEL: So it would just be me alone? +RACHEL: Yes I am! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: II thought it looked better there. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: What's. +RACHEL: But you have it right there in that file? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Yah! +RACHEL: You certainly think a lot of yourself. +RACHEL: I do pilates. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: II don’t want your job. +RACHEL: Oh, it was great! +RACHEL: So, umm how’s Monica? +RACHEL: Be-because the last one was such a big seller? +RACHEL: Hmm. +RACHEL: We stayed up all night coming up with a plan so that us dating will not be a problem. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Ok, so sorry. +RACHEL: That is so cool. +RACHEL: You could bring her, and you guys could go up to your old room, and not make out. +RACHEL: You what? +RACHEL: Yes, my sister's giving us her place for the weekend. +RACHEL: Didn't they die. +RACHEL: Fine-Okay, I have a weird thing about my eye. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: To who? +RACHEL: I made a huge fool of myself and I came back, that shows courage. +RACHEL: Just get out! +RACHEL: I’m so sorry to barge in on your Valentine’s, but I had to get away from all the yelling. +RACHEL: To be nice. +RACHEL: She was still there? +RACHEL: My God! +RACHEL: I’m sorry, I just can’t go to the hospital lookin’ like this. +RACHEL: You're totally right. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Just stop it! +RACHEL: Just do it. +RACHEL: Yes, I did. +RACHEL: Remember? +RACHEL: Sorry sorry we're late, we, uh, kinda just, y'know, lost track of time. +RACHEL: What, so you go over there, you tell him you think he's cute, what's the worst that could happen? +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Sweetheart, you're fired, but how 'bout a quickie before I go to work. +RACHEL: That’s Cujo! +RACHEL: Babies don't care if they're slim. +RACHEL: Yeah, I’ll be fine. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: One - I didn't know that you knew that. +RACHEL: Since when, since when do you think I don’t wear enough of this? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Oh, The Velveteen Rabbit! +RACHEL: Oh God Monica, tell me you were waiting for a guy! +RACHEL: I wouldn't know what I'm gonna do without you. +RACHEL: Oh, Joey, you know what, no-one is gonna be able to tell. +RACHEL: When I was fifteen my dad bought me my own boat. +RACHEL: How can you not remember us kissing?! +RACHEL: Second of all, what did he say when you told him I was pregnant? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: That is my chair now! +RACHEL: They lay out all the stuff here and then you write down your offer and then the highest bid gets it. +RACHEL: I'll cook! +RACHEL: Is he romantic with her? +RACHEL: We are throwing the most depressing baby shower. +RACHEL: Wait, you know what, this is the outfit that makes my calves look fat. +RACHEL: Yeah, and he does it every year! +RACHEL: Y'know, they'll-they'll be outside smoking, making all the decisions and I'll just be up in my office breathing my stupid clean air, y'know? +RACHEL: I want to be Monica’s! +RACHEL: No, no, that's not what we ordered. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Mrs. Kay! +RACHEL: Remember?! +RACHEL: Shut up—I mean don’t cry! +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: What's up Joe? +RACHEL: That sucks! +RACHEL: Did you lose weight? +RACHEL: I've never wanted you more. +RACHEL: No, I'm not blushing, I'm sunburnt! +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Emma laughing and everybody gathered around her cake singing Happy Birthday. +RACHEL: Whoa! +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: Oh, great. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Maybe we should actually move Rosita out of here. +RACHEL: Coming! +RACHEL: No, she was already in, but then this big bitch behind me tried to steal my umbrella, so I clocked her. +RACHEL: Oh, oh, it's not in there! +RACHEL: I mean wouldn't that be a great story? +RACHEL: Whoa ha harrr! +RACHEL: That's something the two of you will be able to enjoy for a really, really, really, really, really long time. +RACHEL: Are-are you saying he’s a geek? +RACHEL: II actually meant in your spare time, do you cook? +RACHEL: I got you some coffee. +RACHEL: No, I can't, I have a baby. +RACHEL: So umm, what time are you supposed to leave? +RACHEL: I've been looking for these since like last summer. +RACHEL: I’ve been trying to reach you all night. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: They rushed into this thing so fast it’s ridiculous! +RACHEL: I thought you only met him once? +RACHEL: You saw it? +RACHEL: Yeah it is, it is. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Is it Ross? +RACHEL: And that I should thank some Ron. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Did-did you come up here to work on that term paper or something? +RACHEL: Yeah, you started it! +RACHEL: Oh no. +RACHEL: Joey. +RACHEL: How long has that been there? +RACHEL: Y’know they say that still waters run deep and I wanna swim in yours. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: All right Phoebe look, I just wanted to say that I'm sorry. +RACHEL: All right, where are we gonna have it? +RACHEL: I mean, aren't you just a, little curious, what that would be like?. +RACHEL: I'm not saying that you shouldn’t have a bag, I just it's just there are other bags that are a little less umm, controversial. +RACHEL: You do? +RACHEL: I’m fine! +RACHEL: You're, you're 'mah mah mah' what? +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: That is not a problem. +RACHEL: You're right, I do feel better, thank you Ross. +RACHEL: We broke up two years ago you've been married since then. +RACHEL: But first, wait, talk to me, talk to me. +RACHEL: Why don't you just yell at them? +RACHEL: That's impressive. +RACHEL: I see him in the hallway, we flirt, I'm all ha-ha-ha-ha, and nothing. +RACHEL: I don't even have a car. +RACHEL: I know, me neither! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Did you just push me? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Ok. That's fine. +RACHEL: Um… Shut up. +RACHEL: He prefers to leave certain things to the imagination. +RACHEL: I've got something that's gonna make you happy. +RACHEL: Honey, well we'll find you something. +RACHEL: I knew that! +RACHEL: Daddy, I just. +RACHEL: It's Alan, he wants to speak to you. +RACHEL: You all know? +RACHEL: Well, this is really awkward Oh, and I can leave! +RACHEL: You can hook it up to your TV and you get radio! +RACHEL: Ohh, with who? +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: Well, maybe the next batch, we could all get some. +RACHEL: What are you gonna do Pheebs? +RACHEL: We, you with someone and me with someone. +RACHEL: What's that like? +RACHEL: Nobody, forget it! +RACHEL: Ross, you don't seem okay. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: How was the honeymoon? +RACHEL: Indian food?! +RACHEL: Ready?. +RACHEL: Oh, that’s sweet. +RACHEL: You know, was I excited about working in the fashion capital of the world? +RACHEL: I’d love to! +RACHEL: I used to think of you as somebody that would never, ever hurt me, ever. +RACHEL: I will think about it. +RACHEL: Oh no wait, that's right. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Okay, see mom, the truth is I can do this on my own. +RACHEL: Calling from Rome! +RACHEL: Do you want some? +RACHEL: Umm, so what’s what is what’s your name? +RACHEL: Monica, y’know what? +RACHEL: Hey, what's up? +RACHEL: No, I think that was the whole all. +RACHEL: Shh-shh-shh! +RACHEL: Ohh, you're so sweet! +RACHEL: I love you on that show! +RACHEL: Yeah, 'cause that's what we do. +RACHEL: Monica put something in our oven this morning. +RACHEL: Oh, Joey, it's so great to be back here. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: What do I want, what d-o I w-a-n-t. Blueberry. +RACHEL: I always thought if you and I got married, it would be the one that stuck. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: You want me to see a therapist? +RACHEL: Okay, that was Phoebe Buffay, everybody. +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Okay, you're right. +RACHEL: Honey that sounds like fun. +RACHEL: Pheebs, can’t make it, got a date. +RACHEL: Rachel. +RACHEL: What a great way to earn some extra pocket money. +RACHEL: What's goin' on? +RACHEL: Well then you have his baby. +RACHEL: But Ross, its you and me! +RACHEL: Who? +RACHEL: Oh, I'm on a date with a really great guy, all I can think about is Ross and his cat and his Julie. +RACHEL: Ohhhhh. +RACHEL: No, you're not an idiot, Ross. +RACHEL: yeah-yeah-yeah! +RACHEL: Yeah, when I was in the bathroom I saw the window that I crawled out of at my wedding, and God, I just started thinking that I shouldn't be here, you know I shouldn't, people are going to be looking at me and judging me and, and thinking about the last time. +RACHEL: I, I broke a cup. +RACHEL: You thought, you actually thought I wanted to have sex with you?! +RACHEL: Gimme the keys! +RACHEL: How amazing is this?! +RACHEL: Yeah, when we're in the audience, he doesn't talk to us, but he does wave. +RACHEL: Phoebe, how would you do this to me? +RACHEL: You can. +RACHEL: Well y’know, we would umm, repeat everything the other said, or uh, we’d jump out of closets to scare each other, or switch the sugar for the salt so they’d put salt on their cereal. +RACHEL: I mean, how can we have her first birthday party without her aunt and her uncle! +RACHEL: Listen I really need your help. +RACHEL: I just, Phoebe, said y’know thought she saw something between you guys. +RACHEL: Yeah, I just get a little bummed when my birthday's over. +RACHEL: Hello! +RACHEL: And um, what-what is that Ross? +RACHEL: I, I don't know. +RACHEL: Fine, I will. +RACHEL: Can somebody please go in? +RACHEL: Come on! +RACHEL: Hey Ross! +RACHEL: Look, I know that you guys really want to get to Vermont and this isn't a really big deal to you, but it really is to us, ok? +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: Oh please. +RACHEL: I really do. +RACHEL: Chandler, there's a guy right over there. +RACHEL: No that's what I was thinking. +RACHEL: I don’t know, I’m sorry, I always slept in the back when we drove up here. +RACHEL: Hey how’s it, how’s it going with you and Mona? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Hello? +RACHEL: Phoebe is gonna be Monica’s maid of honor! +RACHEL: Well, what would we be doing? +RACHEL: All right, I gotta go to bed. +RACHEL: I mean, what am I going to do, get a thousand regular cats? +RACHEL: I am going to do something today. +RACHEL: You just don’t date Ross! +RACHEL: Ah, oh God. +RACHEL: He's interested in you. +RACHEL: I mean they had to ship it all the way from the White Plains store. +RACHEL: There. +RACHEL: It’s kinda slutty. +RACHEL: And that they can make their own decisions. +RACHEL: Y’know I just thought that maybe they could hold the rings in there. +RACHEL: A card! +RACHEL: Ohh, well, this is just perfect! +RACHEL: Do you got your gracious loser face? +RACHEL: Pheebs? +RACHEL: You are so beautiful. +RACHEL: I could just spread him on a cracker. +RACHEL: Ohh, well I'm not totally back yet, but thank you. +RACHEL: I'm. +RACHEL: We’ll have ourselves a little baby Ruth. +RACHEL: No, not really. +RACHEL: They're in a caaar. +RACHEL: I knew it, ahh…. +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: You were really gonna do that, weren't you? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Baddest man in the whole damn town. +RACHEL: No more messing around. +RACHEL: Yeah, I'm fine. +RACHEL: I’m gonna go put some ice on it. +RACHEL: Yeah, I'll hold. +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: It was after the party, we were on the balcony and. +RACHEL: We didn't change. +RACHEL: Um-hmm. +RACHEL: I am just gonna pack up my desk, and I will be gone by the end of the day! +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Hey, are we moving?! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Hey, there was one Italian guy, OK, and do you even have a point? +RACHEL: If only more people knew. +RACHEL: You're right, you're right, we can do this. +RACHEL: Uh. +RACHEL: We were on a break! +RACHEL: That's Daddy. +RACHEL: You like that one? +RACHEL: Even when we were having sex in that chair? +RACHEL: But I would still like to be acknowledged. +RACHEL: I mean, you won't even be here. +RACHEL: It was an amazing night. +RACHEL: I forgot how much I love driving. +RACHEL: Jill? +RACHEL: Aww. +RACHEL: Which means that she heard it too! +RACHEL: Was that the cake? +RACHEL: Claire forgot her glasses! +RACHEL: Hey, Pheebs! +RACHEL: Ohh. +RACHEL: Right? +RACHEL: One day when you are a lot older I am going to tell you that entire story over a pitcher of real margaritas, okay? +RACHEL: Whoa, that Diet Coke just went straight to my head! +RACHEL: This is unbelievable! +RACHEL: Yeah, I'm not talking about her. +RACHEL: Oh, she’s so tiny. +RACHEL: It's just that I wasn't expecting to see you, and all of a sudden you're there and saying these things. +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Have you ever had a virgin margarita? +RACHEL: It's just some things I've been thinking about. +RACHEL: Yes, I saw them from outside. +RACHEL: It's a, it's a cat! +RACHEL: To, uh, fair enough. +RACHEL: I would love to read a poem. +RACHEL: They put my baby’s face on a penis! +RACHEL: Oh, between you telling him that I wanted to have a fling and me putting out on the first date oh, he's so gonna get the wrong idea. +RACHEL: That's great! +RACHEL: Look honey, I know this must be really, really difficult for you and I-Oh, I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Huh, check me out! +RACHEL: Anything! +RACHEL: Alright, that's it! +RACHEL: Yeah, sure, sure I can bring some sandwiches. +RACHEL: This is all my fault I wanted him to open up. +RACHEL: 'Hi Barry! +RACHEL: Oh, that's OK, it's just the shoulder, it's not my dress. +RACHEL: I am really, really trying to cut back, y'know? +RACHEL: Oh my God, she does like it! +RACHEL: I'm doing everything that I can. +RACHEL: Ok, I will have the uh, side salad. +RACHEL: Monica, they are cute, they are doctors, cute doctors, doctors who are cute! +RACHEL: I’m not ashamed of my book. +RACHEL: You really think so? +RACHEL: I get to go pour coffee for people I don't know. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: It’s horrible! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Oh and here’s a little purse that I found. +RACHEL: Yeah, they said he's gonna be fine, but he's still heavily sedated. +RACHEL: They had to reduce it because of, of my deviated septum. +RACHEL: He's your old college roommate. +RACHEL: You heard. +RACHEL: OK! +RACHEL: Do you really think he's gonna fall for that? +RACHEL: I still don't get how you know when it's false labour. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: We fought the Nazis in World War II, not World War I. You’re gonna be late! +RACHEL: Hi, I'm Rachel Green. +RACHEL: Whoa, look at you, you did pretty well. +RACHEL: Yeah, I'll have the soup and the salmon. +RACHEL: I thought this might happen today. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: There’s nothing with a woman enjoying a little erotica. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Hello, excuse me. +RACHEL: Oh wait-wait-wait! +RACHEL: Where did you get him? +RACHEL: Yeah, well that's that lo-cal, non dairy, soy milk junk. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: There was a woman at the. +RACHEL: All right?! +RACHEL: Well, let's see. +RACHEL: I’ll figure something out. +RACHEL: Mr. Thompson, this is Phoebe. +RACHEL: And I'm not sick! +RACHEL: Er Ohhhhh. +RACHEL: Thank you, thank you, thank you! +RACHEL: Y’know? +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I buy 30 fashion magazines a month. +RACHEL: I cannot believe that you didn’t tell me that we are still married! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Did we umm, did we fool around at Lance Davis’ graduation party? +RACHEL: Woo! +RACHEL: You're not gonna get in the middle of anything, don't worry about Ross really, really. +RACHEL: OOH! +RACHEL: Uh-huh, go on. +RACHEL: Ooh great! +RACHEL: Okay, look, the restaurant called, they wanna know if you're gonna be showing up for work? +RACHEL: What’s this? +RACHEL: I don't. +RACHEL: Yeah, what did happen? +RACHEL: Joey got a turkey stuck on his head?! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: Joey, they’re my favorite. +RACHEL: That really meant a lot. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: We’ll be right back sir. +RACHEL: Oh, but that’s okay. +RACHEL: Oh, that must be it. +RACHEL: That is totally different for two reasons. +RACHEL: Oh God. +RACHEL: OK, OK, that is my favorite sweater, that is my third date sweater. +RACHEL: Here is a book of poetry that I know Monica loves. +RACHEL: Well, maybe sometimes I find out things or I hear something and I pass that information on y'know kinda like a public service, it doesn't mean I'm a gossip. +RACHEL: Okay, my father is mean. +RACHEL: Huh? +RACHEL: Maybe you should put it off. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, I'm jealous. +RACHEL: I do too a little bit. +RACHEL: HEY GET OUT OF THE ROAD YOU STUPID STUDENT DRIVER! +RACHEL: Op, but the twelfth brings a lover’s spat. +RACHEL: And so it begins. +RACHEL: Well, I'd have to say gay. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: I know. +RACHEL: Is it just me? +RACHEL: I just had a rough night. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Something else that's not yours that you can break? +RACHEL: So umm, does it? +RACHEL: Goo-ood night! +RACHEL: No Phoebe, I am not letting you put makeup on my baby! +RACHEL: Yes, you have to get her something, and it should be something really nice. +RACHEL: And he said, Laundry? +RACHEL: Yes, yes, I've heard, Oh, she wants to see me tomorrow. +RACHEL: You’re the horny bitch! +RACHEL: We ended up having sex in his chair. +RACHEL: Well, you know what? +RACHEL: Oh, please tell me it's not because I'm going with Mark. +RACHEL: Kitty, kitty, kitty, come ere kitty kitty, kitty kitty.hi? +RACHEL: Ninth grade, right? +RACHEL: Very Monica. +RACHEL: You know what? +RACHEL: Let me finish. +RACHEL: Why, can't you stop staring at me breasts? +RACHEL: What!?! +RACHEL: Nothing! +RACHEL: I don’t own Ross! +RACHEL: Ugh! +RACHEL: Hi you guys! +RACHEL: Do you guys think you could close your eyes for just a sec? +RACHEL: Wow, I love those! +RACHEL: Wh?! +RACHEL: Oohhh. +RACHEL: Yeah, Joey kinda disabled it when I moved in. +RACHEL: You want her back you have to start acting aloof. +RACHEL: Alright, I got it Ross. +RACHEL: I’m sorry! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry, you're right. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Kim, hi. +RACHEL: Oh, I don't know. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Oh yeah? +RACHEL: 'Gone for more jars. +RACHEL: I do not need to see it. +RACHEL: I can’t find her anywhere. +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Good, good, good, good, good. +RACHEL: There is no way I am leaving this room looking like this! +RACHEL: OH GOD! +RACHEL: Please? +RACHEL: Honey, what are you doing here?! +RACHEL: Now Joey, what did the duck do?! +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: Alright, don't tell me, don't tell me! +RACHEL: Oh, how was your date last night? +RACHEL: Yeah, it’s just y’know. +RACHEL: I've got this job. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: That is the new plan. +RACHEL: No, that day, that won't be her real birthday! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Oh hey! +RACHEL: Let me just bed over and get it. +RACHEL: We have to break them up! +RACHEL: I know, I know I'm a pathetic loser. +RACHEL: I think he's stealing from me. +RACHEL: Gavin, I just wanted to say thank you again for watching Emma yesterday during the presentation. +RACHEL: And, Monica help me out here. +RACHEL: Oh, well, it pretty much sucked. +RACHEL: Uh, I'm holding Ben. +RACHEL: Okay, I think we can get the evaluation back before they see it, but we’re gonna have to get into Mr. Zelner’s office. +RACHEL: I don’t wanna make any mistakes, alright? +RACHEL: First there’s a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch, then raspberries, more ladyfingers, then beef sauteed with peas and onions, then a little more custard, and then bananas, and then I just put some whipped cream on top! +RACHEL: I mean, I just had his baby. +RACHEL: Excuse me, there was no time! +RACHEL: Okay honey, he's fine, he's fine, let's just put him down. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Monica look! +RACHEL: Phoebe, honey, wanna get some breakfast? +RACHEL: I could so easily freak out right now. +RACHEL: I know, I know. +RACHEL: Let’s go! +RACHEL: Have you guys seen Jill? +RACHEL: That really is something that's really cool. +RACHEL: Just be calm. +RACHEL: Oh well, well thank you. +RACHEL: You seem really, really nice. +RACHEL: Oh, honey, please, no, I can't get started with all that Ross stuff again. +RACHEL: Or? +RACHEL: Oh my god, you guys. +RACHEL: No-one has been more like a sister to me. +RACHEL: Yeah, you like that baby? +RACHEL: Oh, they're real! +RACHEL: Here you go. +RACHEL: Hey you. +RACHEL: Joey? +RACHEL: You mean like old women? +RACHEL: I want to kiss Joey! +RACHEL: Look he doesn’t have any brothers or sisters, somebody’s gonna have to teach him this stuff! +RACHEL: Oh my. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Yes, you did—Oh my God you didn’t! +RACHEL: By the end of the day, the mailroom guys were calling me Rocky! +RACHEL: No Mon, you want to put them in concentric circles. +RACHEL: Not yet. +RACHEL: The Plaza?! +RACHEL: Look, Ross, he's just. +RACHEL: Yay! +RACHEL: We can’t find Chandler’s vest. +RACHEL: Joey, how do you make that dirty? +RACHEL: Well, you should have. +RACHEL: I'm a big fan! +RACHEL: Okay, we have to do something! +RACHEL: Go on! +RACHEL: Screw ‘em! +RACHEL: Did you see how. +RACHEL: And you've got lenses! +RACHEL: See, see, okay, I work in fashion, see and-and, this is a real dress actually. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Hmm. +RACHEL: I need to get on the 11 o'clock flight. +RACHEL: And ya know what, now I've got closure. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Ohhhhh God. +RACHEL: I was uh, tellin’ Phoebe about that one crazy night after the Sigma Chi luau where you and I uh, we made out. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I don't know, maybe it's because she has got such callousy fingers from playing crummy guitar. +RACHEL: I told you, those swings are evil! +RACHEL: Yes, so close. +RACHEL: So, dig in! +RACHEL: Not so much. +RACHEL: Never happened! +RACHEL: Anyway, they want to take us out Saturday night! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Honey, you have nothing to prove. +RACHEL: But I. +RACHEL: There’s not gonna be a wedding. +RACHEL: And you can go back to enjoying your little hamburger. +RACHEL: Oh, please! +RACHEL: I know, I know, but uh just, I'm telling you, once, once you get past that part, that where it-it just feels like you wanna die, he's-he's really a good person. +RACHEL: Mom. +RACHEL: Yes it is! +RACHEL: This is great. +RACHEL: Honey um, honey, you do realise that we don’t keep the women’s lingerie here in the office? +RACHEL: Wh… Come on! +RACHEL: Oh yeah! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: She's yours! +RACHEL: Uh, yeah, well, see, he. +RACHEL: And I know it's not your big money song, but it's my favorite. +RACHEL: Would anybody like more coffee? +RACHEL: Gosh, you look soo familiar. +RACHEL: I don't care what you think! +RACHEL: And y'know, and um, I. Ugh. +RACHEL: Phoebe's dead. +RACHEL: I watched! +RACHEL: ‘Sup? +RACHEL: In fact you know what I'd do? +RACHEL: I mean we all have our baggage! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: We gotta think about the flowers, the caterers, the music. +RACHEL: Yeah, it's a real shame you can't make it to that one-woman show tonight. +RACHEL: Oh, wait! +RACHEL: Oh, here’s that trench-coat that you wanted. +RACHEL: Hey, Ross! +RACHEL: Fifty-two minutes. +RACHEL: Okay, just give me the damn drops! +RACHEL: I could call in sick and not deal with it at all. +RACHEL: Every time. +RACHEL: Ohh, I'm gonna have to get over it. +RACHEL: Oh, it's perfect! +RACHEL: Oh I can’t believe Joey Tribbiani heard me throw up! +RACHEL: The lights, please. +RACHEL: Huh. +RACHEL: Oh whose side are you on? +RACHEL: Did Joey say what he was gonna do when he left? +RACHEL: Oh, that’s true. +RACHEL: We'll run in the park. +RACHEL: Give me those forms! +RACHEL: Yeah, I can't wait to go back to work. +RACHEL: But you did! +RACHEL: Mark and I talked, and I realised how much I love your stupid brother, and, yeah, we got our problems, but I really want to make it work. +RACHEL: I was a Kappa. +RACHEL: No awareness. +RACHEL: Yeah, I mean, you should play in public! +RACHEL: Man, I never thought I'd be here. +RACHEL: Now, he doesn’t get in until 10, so he’s no problem, but his assistant, Betty, she comes in early to eat her breakfast at her desk. +RACHEL: I just can't keep this one in, so I pick up the phone. +RACHEL: That's what I said. +RACHEL: I think you should go. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: It turned out it was a hat! +RACHEL: And then act aloof. +RACHEL: And so were-were you close to your parents? +RACHEL: They’re…they’re-they’re my friends, uh, Monica Stephanopolus and uh, and Chandler Acidofolus. +RACHEL: Hi, it's Rachel. +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: What is the emergency?! +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: This is all happening so fast. +RACHEL: Thank you judges. +RACHEL: Ohh, so no sign of Emily huh? +RACHEL: Ew, was Chandler naked? +RACHEL: Yes, it bothers me Ross, but y'know if he was a regular at the coffee house, I'd be serving him sneezers. +RACHEL: So do you have any moves? +RACHEL: Well, he makes t-shirts for a living, and he thought it would be appropriate to give me this. +RACHEL: Why why do you get the story? +RACHEL: Come on Joey, I just bought you a new chair! +RACHEL: fellas. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: We have Friday… Yesterday! +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: I’m talking about a bet, winner takes all. +RACHEL: We’re gonna find love! +RACHEL: Hips or thighs? +RACHEL: So what do you say we make a pact? +RACHEL: Well, that shouldn’t be a problem. +RACHEL: Shhh. +RACHEL: Oh sure Ross, yeah. +RACHEL: Okay, come on. +RACHEL: Calm down Norma Rae. +RACHEL: All right, I'm just gonna go on the date. +RACHEL: Right. +RACHEL: Oh, hi! +RACHEL: Really, no, please, please, that's, that's okay. +RACHEL: I mean you’ll be like the Big Cheese! +RACHEL: Tell me everything. +RACHEL: Oh, thank you! +RACHEL: I’m not yelling at you, I’m just yelling near you. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Well I saw that! +RACHEL: No, no, trust, me, it's, it's, it's much better that I know. +RACHEL: I feel violated. +RACHEL: Charming. +RACHEL: I love you! +RACHEL: Oh, my God. +RACHEL: In a month? +RACHEL: How come we didn’t cross paths? +RACHEL: So, will I like any of these guys? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Hi you. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Hey you. +RACHEL: You’re a horrible skier. +RACHEL: Joey, you are not! +RACHEL: Because I think I just heard her moving around in there. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: You gonna crash on the couch? +RACHEL: Well, she told me too! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: I’m sorry, I was just reading the joke below it. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Paolo I want you to meet my friends, this is Monica. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I get a big pay raise! +RACHEL: Just open up and put it in your mouth. +RACHEL: Aww, look at you all handsome! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Done. +RACHEL: Um-hmm, yeah. +RACHEL: Honey, I'm sorry, they were all out of apple pie, someone just got the last piece. +RACHEL: Okay, okay. +RACHEL: They’re right on that chair under Ross’s coat. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Hey, do you guys wanna go see a movie? +RACHEL: How do you get the mainsail up? +RACHEL: Are you drunk?! +RACHEL: Oh God, I can’t believe you’re making such a big deal about this. +RACHEL: Oh yeah, I’d actually love a blueberry muffin and a chamomile tea. +RACHEL: Should I be concerned that a button fell off the old Hugsy and I can't find it? +RACHEL: So she’s really not dead. +RACHEL: Your parents’? +RACHEL: Don’t go in there! +RACHEL: We weren't doing anything! +RACHEL: So to sum it up, yeah. +RACHEL: Chandler, aren’t you worried about what to get Monica for Christmas? +RACHEL: Because of course I do. +RACHEL: Hey, Mon, I was just doing the dishes! +RACHEL: Oh my God, he dream-cheated on you! +RACHEL: Y'know what, I want you to leave! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Chandler Bing, it's time to see your thing. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Let's play Twister! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: Oh God, she mu, she must need her diaper changed. +RACHEL: Anyway, so we were saying good-bye and ugh! +RACHEL: Listen, I heard about you and Charlie. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Ross, she still has not noticed that the baby's sock is on the ground. +RACHEL: Nodded off! +RACHEL: OK, here, I'm gonna break my foot, right now, there. +RACHEL: Merrill Lynch? +RACHEL: Can I see that for second. +RACHEL: Ross, Chandler wrote something about me on his computer and he won't let me see. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I can’t, I can’t feel my hands. +RACHEL: I'mI'm really warm, so I'm going to be taking off my sweater. +RACHEL: Let us keep the apartment and. +RACHEL: Eight weeks. +RACHEL: Storage rooms give me the creeps! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: NO! +RACHEL: For me. +RACHEL: Ross, you are so much better for me than Paolo ever was. +RACHEL: Pancho Vila? +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Oh, I am sorry. +RACHEL: Oh-oh-oh! +RACHEL: Y’know, like-like your childhood! +RACHEL: This doesn't make you less of a guy! +RACHEL: Yeah that works. +RACHEL: Oh yeah surfer? +RACHEL: Just need to relax… I am not horsing around, okay? +RACHEL: So that’s me as a cheerleader! +RACHEL: Sandy made Madeleines. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Well I’ll tell ya! +RACHEL: I was walking down the street thinking, ‘I’m gonna tell the father today’ and then bam! +RACHEL: No-no-don’t! +RACHEL: Last time you went out with her you said she was a ‘big, dull dud.’ Well, last time I almost got fired. +RACHEL: Could you get that? +RACHEL: I did it. +RACHEL: Shh. +RACHEL: HI! +RACHEL: Yeah, come here! +RACHEL: But you are a liar. +RACHEL: Are you sure? +RACHEL: Well, they said would but they would only give me store credit. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. +RACHEL: They made you head of the department! +RACHEL: What happened out there? +RACHEL: That’s not, that’s not right. +RACHEL: Oh my god Chandler! +RACHEL: Wait a minute, III, I can't do this. +RACHEL: No, I know, they're from me. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh, okay. +RACHEL: Which you're not, because you've totally hung up on him! +RACHEL: Aren’t you sweet! +RACHEL: I accidentally packed these with my stuff. +RACHEL: And I won! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Thank you! +RACHEL: Kind of smells like chicken? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: I don't know. +RACHEL: Noo! +RACHEL: If I squint I can pretend he's Alan Alda. +RACHEL: I have to have dinner with that Melissa girl. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: I cannot keep having this same fight over and over again, Ross, no, you’re, you’re, you’re making this too hard. +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: I thought we were the patch sisters! +RACHEL: She's yours! +RACHEL: Yeah, I admit it. +RACHEL: If you need Hugsy, don't worry. +RACHEL: Yeah I know—I’m good—I got it! +RACHEL: Never ever ever again. +RACHEL: Yes, he says I’m damaged goods. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: They were like, Start your maternity leave now! +RACHEL: I cannot believe that I did this. +RACHEL: Good luck, Rach. +RACHEL: Well y’know, we did other stuff too. +RACHEL: And we don’t even have to lie we just won’t say anything. +RACHEL: You’ve got magazines! +RACHEL: Oh, she's still napping. +RACHEL: Sure Pheebs, you know, that's what it's there for, emergencies and pretend agents. +RACHEL: Uma Thurman, Winona Ryder, Elizabeth Hurely, Michelle Pfieffer, and Dorothy Hammel? +RACHEL: Well, there's a kiss that he won't forget for a couple of hours, y'know. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I had a bra. +RACHEL: What do you need? +RACHEL: He uh, just gets really nervous when he's flirting. +RACHEL: You have to be organized! +RACHEL: You think about stuff like that? +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: It's Naked Ross! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Where did you get them? +RACHEL: Oh, remember that Thanksgiving when Rachel screwed up the trifle? +RACHEL: Yeah? +RACHEL: He's coming. +RACHEL: Oh you know what? +RACHEL: Can we please just cover this up with something?! +RACHEL: We could be like the Patch Sisters! +RACHEL: Be-cause Ross is the father of my child! +RACHEL: Oh, honey, I don’t know. +RACHEL: And for these beautiful gifts, and this basket is beautiful. +RACHEL: Yeah so get ready to hear alot of ehm boohaki, goshdarnit and brotherpucker. +RACHEL: I really think you need to go now. +RACHEL: What if I wanna be a a purse, y'know? +RACHEL: I'm sorry! +RACHEL: First ones here! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I wanna look nice. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Thanks, Mon. +RACHEL: Oh, my-my new assistant has very happy that I hired my new assistant. +RACHEL: I found it! +RACHEL: What are you talking about?! +RACHEL: Are you comparing my daughter to a rat? +RACHEL: Closure. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: You are asking me to be your wife! +RACHEL: Oh no, I’m sorry, you look a lot different from the last time II saw you. +RACHEL: I've got to chill. +RACHEL: So did you read your evaluation yet? +RACHEL: Ben y’know when uh, when you were a baby, you and I used to hang out all the time. +RACHEL: Y’know, I gotta tell ya writing, I mean writing, gets me uh, gets me kinda hot. +RACHEL: Yeah, at the lecture, I told you that last week, you said you didn't mind. +RACHEL: Two, two babies? +RACHEL: What happened? +RACHEL: Jealous of what? +RACHEL: Thanks for the party, honey. +RACHEL: You really think she's hot? +RACHEL: Now that I'm back, why don't you just fill me in on what you've been up to? +RACHEL: I panicked, I panicked. +RACHEL: I don't need you to come! +RACHEL: His wife just had twins. +RACHEL: Why the hell didn't you tell me! +RACHEL: She's mine! +RACHEL: Do mine. +RACHEL: Wait, II just said leave. +RACHEL: Oh, right, that's me! +RACHEL: Please come on! +RACHEL: Water it is. +RACHEL: Chandler, this is not addressed to you. +RACHEL: Do you want to put the book in the freezer? +RACHEL: Oh, I'm so glad you called. +RACHEL: Okay, II’ll go upstairs. +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: Hi, sweetie! +RACHEL: Oh, you're not gonna tell the whole story about how your parents got divorced again are you? +RACHEL: Country club newsletter. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Oh shoot. +RACHEL: Okay, first of all, that's stupid and second of all, I'm not allowed to talk to Ralph. +RACHEL: Or should I be Hi! +RACHEL: Joey, I’m really sorry that I lied to you. +RACHEL: Joey, Emma's right here! +RACHEL: Anastassakis Papasifakis wedding, excellent! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Is it, is it 'cause she's so cold in bed. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: What’s the matter? +RACHEL: So umm, what's this book about? +RACHEL: We got locked out of the apartment, we. +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Now, does it really matter? +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: What, what, what, no, I don't wanna do that. +RACHEL: Oh-oh-oh, which one is Bonnie again? +RACHEL: You want me to talk you out of it? +RACHEL: I’d have to say I really don’t care for your tone. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: You know? +RACHEL: Do you guys want these? +RACHEL: Is Joey here? +RACHEL: And I'm telling you, you with the steady hand, I am not moving, and now I have got the steady hand. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Me, Fladermouse, great. +RACHEL: It was. +RACHEL: Ohh, not compared to you. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: That’s Cujo! +RACHEL: Yeah that’s right you weren’t thinking! +RACHEL: Look, maybe we should take a break. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Yes. +RACHEL: Oh, I don't think she likes the new Hugsy. +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: Bye Mon. +RACHEL: Hmmm…. +RACHEL: It was…really wonderful! +RACHEL: What do you want? +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Oh no, I know I couldn’t see it either at first, but it’s right umm… Ross, I lost it again. +RACHEL: That would be sooo much fun! +RACHEL: I have got to get my license renewed. +RACHEL: I mean two best friends falling in love, how often does that happen? +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Pablo Diaz, Brady Smith, huh, Guy-in-van? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh thank you! +RACHEL: Honey, you’re not gonna make enough money to help Frank and Alice just by selling knives. +RACHEL: Well, I guess we just find a divorce lawyer? +RACHEL: Don’t you recognize him? +RACHEL: Oh God, even his knock is boring. +RACHEL: So, what, you’re just, you’re just okay with being flaky? +RACHEL: Okay, y'know what? +RACHEL: Good for me! +RACHEL: It never occured to anybody to bring another one. +RACHEL: Okay, just a little scared. +RACHEL: I think she is trying to make something happen with you to get back at me! +RACHEL: What was that? +RACHEL: I’m sorry. +RACHEL: That’s right! +RACHEL: You are just a horrible person! +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Oh, him, the little guy? +RACHEL: Oh, Chandler! +RACHEL: What did I say? +RACHEL: Y’know what? +RACHEL: Oh, God. +RACHEL: And the ring, was the size of my fist! +RACHEL: It was like this crazy-eyed, hairy beast man! +RACHEL: Anybody? +RACHEL: Ok, number 30. +RACHEL: Now! +RACHEL: It's nothing. +RACHEL: Goody, what is it! +RACHEL: Can I be your girlfriend again? +RACHEL: Including umm, evil bitch and uh, sick bastard. +RACHEL: Exactly! +RACHEL: I’m not saying that I’m a lesbian! +RACHEL: But we should move quick. +RACHEL: Oh yeah? +RACHEL: It’s all gonna be okay. +RACHEL: Oh look who it is, my husband. +RACHEL: Sure! +RACHEL: What should I ha-ave? +RACHEL: How many guesses do you get? +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: We’re gonna split it! +RACHEL: You’ve, you’ve done it right? +RACHEL: Allright. +RACHEL: I mean, let’s be honest. +RACHEL: Yeah, but she also invited you and Ross. +RACHEL: Might as well just go home. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Can I ask you something? +RACHEL: Ross, it’s okay. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: It's just this thing. +RACHEL: Cooking soothes me. +RACHEL: Are you sure? +RACHEL: Free sample of coffee. +RACHEL: I can not believe your trading me! +RACHEL: She keeps lying to me! +RACHEL: When certain people leave the table and I am not finished! +RACHEL: No, I mean come on that’s-that’s crazy. +RACHEL: O-okay! +RACHEL: Y’know, I mean you think you know someone even, even Phoebe who’s always been somewhat of a question mark. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Oh my God. +RACHEL: Hi Pheebs. +RACHEL: I can't believe I ever even tried to help you. +RACHEL: Yeah, for some people. +RACHEL: You were right. +RACHEL: That's right! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: What are we gonna do? +RACHEL: Alright, look, I have to go. +RACHEL: Oh we just—we drove each other crazy! +RACHEL: Ooooo! +RACHEL: Have you ever had any weird romantic dreams? +RACHEL: Yeah, actually Daddy Ross is allergic to lobster. +RACHEL: Okay sweetie, you can do it. +RACHEL: Ohh, please! +RACHEL: Wow, Monica, I love that, you really have faith in me. +RACHEL: Chandler! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I do not want Emma going there. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Ok, look, Ross. +RACHEL: I will! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Every day, you are becoming more and more like your mother. +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: I love you, but you're crazy. +RACHEL: I haven't seen him in so long! +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: It would be like throwing away a hundred bucks! +RACHEL: Yes, I was 4 years old and I was on the swing and then all of a sudden my hair got tangled in the chain. +RACHEL: Because! +RACHEL: Why don’t we, why don’t we see what kind of number he has on his speed dial, and then from that we can tell who has more in common with him. +RACHEL: I thought it was Ross. +RACHEL: Oh, what a fun office. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Virgin! +RACHEL: Hmmmm. +RACHEL: Monica, what are you doing? +RACHEL: Yeah, yeah right. +RACHEL: What kind of discount do we get? +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: Look you guys, I'm really excited about this! +RACHEL: Wait-wait-wait, I just thought of another story about how nice Ross is! +RACHEL: I'm great. +RACHEL: He hasn't called me since that one time when we went out. +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: Y’know, I ended up having a really good time. +RACHEL: What's 1922? +RACHEL: Oh, God, he's such a pig, He's like a big disgusting. +RACHEL: Would you guys stop. +RACHEL: I'llI'll keep that in mind. +RACHEL: Did you talk to him? +RACHEL: MONICA! +RACHEL: Hey, Mom? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: I mean, it-it was like, it was like he made us into a team. +RACHEL: Oh no! +RACHEL: Yet… Yeah, it would be really weird. +RACHEL: Joey, honey, they don't know what they're talking about. +RACHEL: I’m sorry? +RACHEL: I think we are, I think we are so on the right track! +RACHEL: Can't you tell when I'm being fake? +RACHEL: Umm, I think there’s something that we really need to talk about. +RACHEL: Oh he's cute! +RACHEL: Monica. +RACHEL: You guys, there's a little girl in Soho looking for this cat. +RACHEL: Excuse me! +RACHEL: But Ross, we are not in love, are we? +RACHEL: She didn't want me not important. +RACHEL: Here he is. +RACHEL: Okay uh, but before you do that. +RACHEL: Joanna, this is my friend Chandler Bing Joanna. +RACHEL: I'm in my kitchen, naked! +RACHEL: So uh, so did anything happen? +RACHEL: Now go shave that head! +RACHEL: Well, I brought the next best thing. +RACHEL: But Joey, isn't this cool? +RACHEL: Nine? +RACHEL: Alright. +RACHEL: Well, maybe they can find a way to bring you back. +RACHEL: Oh we were, but that was just a, I mean that was just a big drunken mistake. +RACHEL: Hey Mona! +RACHEL: Uh. +RACHEL: Oh Phoebe, I'm so happy for you honey. +RACHEL: Well there is no Mark Robbinson in this office. +RACHEL: Oh Ross, thank you. +RACHEL: This chair’s not going anywhere. +RACHEL: Wait! +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: All I really needed was a plan. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: And you know what? +RACHEL: Hey. +RACHEL: Sorry about your tiney-wienie. +RACHEL: You are having a party tonight? +RACHEL: Now listen, look-look, I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression, but I am not some hussy who will just sleep around to get ahead! +RACHEL: Well y’know, I just want to take a moment and thank you guys for how great you’ve been during this time. +RACHEL: I know, but all that work you're doing to get it ready, I just. +RACHEL: I just want him to love you like I do. +RACHEL: I think I am. +RACHEL: Well, isn't that a good thing? +RACHEL: Well, wait a minute! +RACHEL: Well, they uh, they-they do more than that. +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Oh, y'know, would you just for once, not remember every, little, thing! +RACHEL: This is Chandler. +RACHEL: Well, people missed you in there. +RACHEL: Good. +RACHEL: Joshua’s gone so you and Emily are free to go. +RACHEL: You don’t get any dessert. +RACHEL: That's it! +RACHEL: Well y'know if you, if you started smoking again you could've at least told me! +RACHEL: Sorry. +RACHEL: Oh, I really could. +RACHEL: Having fun? +RACHEL: I’ll take a coffee. +RACHEL: I mean, I never thought of you as a guy who needed his men to be men. +RACHEL: Well what?! +RACHEL: All right, straight, and not subtle. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Ooh, I've been better. +RACHEL: Emily! +RACHEL: It won't come off! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: No, you don't, Ross. +RACHEL: How about that drawer? +RACHEL: That sounds like so much fun. +RACHEL: I'm training to be better at a job that I hate, my life officially sucks. +RACHEL: Oh it's OK. You were worth the wait, and I don't just mean tonight. +RACHEL: Y’know Bob in Human Resources… Look, this is not that big of a deal! +RACHEL: I can't go to my own prom without a date, I can't, it's too late. +RACHEL: I don't need someone telling me what is best for me. +RACHEL: NATO guy is, but I do know that you have to get as far away as you can from that hat. +RACHEL: I earned this. +RACHEL: Is this juice? +RACHEL: You owe me one bald girl! +RACHEL: Aren't you a little cute to be a doctor? +RACHEL: Here’s your moisturiser. +RACHEL: Just do it! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Remember I had to leave the room the other day when you had that roast chicken? +RACHEL: Just one cheek. +RACHEL: What else? +RACHEL: Honey, it’s so sweet that you want me to stay, but II can’t do that to you. +RACHEL: Honey, you can say it, Poconos, Poconos, it's like Poc-o-nos. +RACHEL: Great! +RACHEL: Joey doesn’t share food. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Ha! +RACHEL: Ross trusted me, what is he going to say?! +RACHEL: Hey, what are you thinking? +RACHEL: What happened? +RACHEL: Phoebe told me that - that you owned your own restaurant. +RACHEL: Fourth gear! +RACHEL: Its back in cage! +RACHEL: We were not on a—Okay. +RACHEL: Huh! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: When did this happen? +RACHEL: What those things aren’t on your list? +RACHEL: No, I didn't. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: Open your drapes! +RACHEL: Did you know he was in there? +RACHEL: Oh, god, I can't believe one of us actually has one of these. +RACHEL: You've totally messed with the back support of my chair. +RACHEL: I cannot listen to anymore of this! +RACHEL: I need more details, who-who initiated the first kiss? +RACHEL: I don't need that today. +RACHEL: So? +RACHEL: Right? +RACHEL: My bed. +RACHEL: Wait a but-but she just, she said that Joey was her backup. +RACHEL: Right, right, yes! +RACHEL: Hello. +RACHEL: I can’t believe that’s our baby. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh come on! +RACHEL: I’m so happy for you guys! +RACHEL: Pheebs, what happened? +RACHEL: Although we would love to see you do that again. +RACHEL: It’s-it’s umm…it’s my boss. +RACHEL: You’re so-so sweet, honey. +RACHEL: I mean she’s sweet, she-she likes baseball, and she-she had two beers at lunch. +RACHEL: What-what?! +RACHEL: Because once I make a copy, there’s no turning back. +RACHEL: Oh boy. +RACHEL: Ok. You decorate dad's office and so now you're a decorator. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Hmm. +RACHEL: You know I. Wow. +RACHEL: Surprise me. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: So I'm out having lunch at Monica's and this guy starts talking to me, and it turns out he works for a buyer at Bloomingdale's and there happens to be an opening in his department. +RACHEL: Wanna come see a movie with us? +RACHEL: Oh, I did! +RACHEL: I don't want him to wake up alone! +RACHEL: And you're gonna want him to eat his heart out so you're gonna have to look fabulous! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Did you or did you not tell him that I was looking for a serious relationship? +RACHEL: I love him. +RACHEL: I think you killed us. +RACHEL: Huh? +RACHEL: Oh look, she’s pulling away again! +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: But by any chance did Joanna send any paperwork your way before it happened. +RACHEL: Hey, Pheebs! +RACHEL: So. +RACHEL: Oh that’s right. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Yeesss. +RACHEL: Well yeah. +RACHEL: It’s just too weird, all right? +RACHEL: This is a huge breakthrough for her! +RACHEL: It seems like forever ago. +RACHEL: I don't know, you thought 'See you Saturday' was funny. +RACHEL: I’m back. +RACHEL: Oh, c'mon. +RACHEL: Five. +RACHEL: Hey, so he stole a couple bucks from me! +RACHEL: I can not believe I have to walk down the aisle in front of 200 people looking like something you drink when your nauseous. +RACHEL: Ok, I, hey, I'm not gonna lie to you. +RACHEL: You are so beyond help. +RACHEL: I’m just saying that y’know, someday Ross is gonna meet somebody and…he’s gonna have his own life. +RACHEL: Because I knew you were lying! +RACHEL: Joey, just-just he-he’s new in town and I know he doesn’t have any guy friends. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: This is about you being a brat! +RACHEL: Ok, so let's talk money. +RACHEL: Chandler! +RACHEL: All right, we’ve got to tell her he’s gone. +RACHEL: Ross, they’re just saving them for the important people! +RACHEL: All right all right all right all right, I know. +RACHEL: Please, please! +RACHEL: It’s a little more comfortable. +RACHEL: Well maybe, maybe she's with us right now? +RACHEL: Yeah, I got stuff to burn. +RACHEL: You wanna go inside and have some coffee? +RACHEL: It was nice to meet you. +RACHEL: Well wait a minute, what happened to Days of Our Lives? +RACHEL: You can’t quit! +RACHEL: I have one. +RACHEL: Drums? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I mean hell, I had a crush on you when I first met ya! +RACHEL: I need help! +RACHEL: Oh, yeah, sure, sure, sure, sure. +RACHEL: Well, I think we gotta go. +RACHEL: I’m gonna be in Soap Opera Digest! +RACHEL: Okay, you ready? +RACHEL: Have fun! +RACHEL: II actually work at Ralph Lauren! +RACHEL: Good kisser? +RACHEL: Yeah, but it was different with him today! +RACHEL: That was not mean. +RACHEL: That’s gonna leave a stain! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: No, y’know what? +RACHEL: Hi, I’m sorry I’m late but I am ready, ready to talk you up! +RACHEL: Well, I’ll ask him for you, if you want me too? +RACHEL: I don't know! +RACHEL: But it's not obvious why. +RACHEL: But you did it too! +RACHEL: Monica! +RACHEL: I’m sure he will forgive you. +RACHEL: Not stupid. +RACHEL: Alright, Monica, I want you to have the first taste. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: I mean, that woman made you miserable! +RACHEL: Wow that was a big one. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Hey, guys, what's up. +RACHEL: Well, y’know he lost his keys so he was looking for them. +RACHEL: He’s talking to the baby. +RACHEL: Monica Geller.' +RACHEL: God! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Who's this from? +RACHEL: Right? +RACHEL: We are desert stealers! +RACHEL: You hug me! +RACHEL: Ah, II never should have said what I said. +RACHEL: And he’s such a sweet guy and he loves me so much. +RACHEL: Chandler! +RACHEL: Umm, honey, look he just came over to. +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: Daddy, daddy, you know what, I really wanna hear more about this, I really do, but I just have, I just have to do a, some stuff. +RACHEL: Well, we're not seeing each other, so. +RACHEL: That isthe Coast Guard. +RACHEL: Go Monana! +RACHEL: Phoebe, I think. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Bye, Chandler. +RACHEL: And I have had no babies! +RACHEL: Oh yeah, sure. +RACHEL: I had a baby. +RACHEL: Well, uh, that’s uh, that’s interesting. +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: You guys are all sleep deprived. +RACHEL: This place is amazing. +RACHEL: I almost caught that one! +RACHEL: Thanks, hey so uh what’d you do last night? +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Damn! +RACHEL: She’s coming! +RACHEL: And also, I ran out on a wedding. +RACHEL: Mom always hated it because the ocean air made her hair all big. +RACHEL: No, I really shouldn’t say anything. +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: It’s doctor recommended! +RACHEL: I mean. +RACHEL: Well, it's a little low, pick up a little, a little bit more, a little bit more. +RACHEL: Paul is taking me out to dinner tonight, he said he has a big surprise planned. +RACHEL: Would-would you get me a Diet Coke? +RACHEL: Shut up! +RACHEL: I am such a huge fan! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: That is not my responsibility. +RACHEL: Come on, he lives three blocks away! +RACHEL: Gleba! +RACHEL: Is that the heartbeat? +RACHEL: Uh, okay, sure! +RACHEL: Phoebe. +RACHEL: What are we talking about? +RACHEL: Oh my God, wait did I. I just said Greens don’t quit didn’t I? +RACHEL: Oh, that is so sweet! +RACHEL: You could, say you're sorry to her mom. +RACHEL: But Joey you don’t have 20,000! +RACHEL: I'm there! +RACHEL: I wonder why she thinks you’re going to call her? +RACHEL: Really?! +RACHEL: Mom that’s okay that you didn’t get you a gift! +RACHEL: Yeah! +RACHEL: Oh, come on! +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Phoebe’s. +RACHEL: There you are! +RACHEL: Don’t worry, we’re just gonna search here for an hour, them we’re gonna go over to Joey’s and search, OK? +RACHEL: I dunno. +RACHEL: How was basketball? +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: I'm just cleaning up. +RACHEL: So these signals Ross, explain this to me, ‘cause maybe I need to be more careful. +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Somebody got in late last night. +RACHEL: Marcel, this is for you. +RACHEL: I can throw, would you let me throw, come on this is my game too. +RACHEL: Aha! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: I think that’s pretty strong, that’s what I think. +RACHEL: I mean, it's not sweet, it's not cute, I even dragged that little string on the ground, and it just flipped out and scratched the hell out of me. +RACHEL: Apartment pants? +RACHEL: What thing? +RACHEL: Honey, what are you doing? +RACHEL: Oh, you're gonna love this cake. +RACHEL: Yeah, kicking a guy in the crotch all morning really takes it out of ya! +RACHEL: Okay, hold on just a second. +RACHEL: She gave me the green light, I did nothing but-. +RACHEL: Morning! +RACHEL: And, that's the most sex I'm gonna have this weekend. +RACHEL: And then I got really freaked out, and that's when it hit me: how much Barry looks like Mr. +RACHEL: Oh, my! +RACHEL: Whoa-whoa what’s under the covers? +RACHEL: Oh hi! +RACHEL: Rachel Green is very happy you're in her room! +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: What's that? +RACHEL: All right! +RACHEL: Please! +RACHEL: Well there’s yore. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Ohh, thank God! +RACHEL: Oh, I have to go tell Monica what a wonderful brother she has! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: Yes? +RACHEL: That's really nice. +RACHEL: This is it, isn't it? +RACHEL: Chandler? +RACHEL: Not at all! +RACHEL: All right? +RACHEL: Then what's gonna happen? +RACHEL: Did you tell the doctor you did it jumping up and down on your bed? +RACHEL: Hi. +RACHEL: Hi, it's Rachel Green. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: You should be the one to go! +RACHEL: Ooh, this one was Pierce Brosnan! +RACHEL: You live far away! +RACHEL: You would think! +RACHEL: When I saw him get off that plane with her, I really thought I hit rock bottom. +RACHEL: I can't believe this. +RACHEL: I do need you! +RACHEL: And here we have the last of Paulo's grappa. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Joey, I think everyone saw the wine come out of your nose. +RACHEL: What are you doing here? +RACHEL: What else did he say? +RACHEL: Because, he's my friend. +RACHEL: Careful, watch her hair. +RACHEL: NO! +RACHEL: That's what I want to talk to you about. +RACHEL: What do you do now? +RACHEL: Ross you're not listening to me, I don't have time to stop. +RACHEL: Please sit. +RACHEL: I gotta go! +RACHEL: Step away from the crib, I have a weapon! +RACHEL: How long? +RACHEL: Wait a minute! +RACHEL: What happened? +RACHEL: I mean Danny? +RACHEL: God, you have to tell me what happens tomorrow! +RACHEL: You know we were all alone and he was being really nice to me and, oh and he gave me this scarf. +RACHEL: Are you breaking up with us? +RACHEL: Well isn't it better that I exchanged it for something that I enjoy and that I can get a lot of use out of? +RACHEL: You guys, I’m doing the best I can, anyone else is welcome to try. +RACHEL: Sandy was just, was just telling me about how he proposed to his fiancée and it was just sooo beautiful. +RACHEL: Nooo! +RACHEL: Oh it was perfect! +RACHEL: Hey, so did you have fun with uh, with Joey last night? +RACHEL: My digital fairy tale is about to begin. +RACHEL: I do that too, with my shampoo bottle. +RACHEL: Ok, he's goin' to get my coat. +RACHEL: I am not gonna ask Frank to give you one of his kids! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Phoebe kinda made a mistake. +RACHEL: I’m um…let’s talk. +RACHEL: Nice? +RACHEL: Just stay here and, maybe close your blinds at night. +RACHEL: Yeahh, but, but those really go better with pants. +RACHEL: Look at him. +RACHEL: Bye-bye-e! +RACHEL: You know the book says that whenever she’s sleeping I should be sleeping so. +RACHEL: I'll see you Monday! +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: We're holding. +RACHEL: Okay, it's missing something. +RACHEL: I know queen is high! +RACHEL: You said that she was, I just didn’t disagree with you. +RACHEL: Ooh, I just feel bad, I never vacuum. +RACHEL: Well what if I told you, you can do it in my apartment? +RACHEL: Oh, Joey! +RACHEL: Oh, damn you Geller! +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Sure. +RACHEL: All right, well not exactly like I do, but, but, if you do come to dinner, I'll love you like I do in that black thing that you like. +RACHEL: It’s getting really old. +RACHEL: Excellent! +RACHEL: So what do you say? +RACHEL: Aw. +RACHEL: Hello. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: Uhh, because I’m trying to play hard to get. +RACHEL: Joey, do you have a minute? +RACHEL: And thank you for watching the baby, by the way. +RACHEL: Hey, listen, can we ask you a question? +RACHEL: Honey, what is the big deal? +RACHEL: Ralph Lauren called again and they offered me more money. +RACHEL: What, what, what is it with you and this holiday? +RACHEL: Here is that table that I ordered. +RACHEL: I'm just glad that you're here. +RACHEL: I'm Kip. +RACHEL: What line? +RACHEL: Umm, do you guys have any juice? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: I mean maybe you didn’t hear about a serious relationship called me and Joshua? +RACHEL: Here?! +RACHEL: So, how are the elves? +RACHEL: Oh, I win! +RACHEL: He is so cute! +RACHEL: Hey, what do you think is a better excuse for why I’m not drinking on this date tonight. +RACHEL: At his apartment. +RACHEL: I have a massage appointment under Rachel Green, and here is my gift certificate. +RACHEL: Well I just came. +RACHEL: Oh, I thought you guys meant marijuana cigarettes, y'know? +RACHEL: Ow! +RACHEL: It was really fun being married to you tonight. +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Okay, stop. +RACHEL: No-no! +RACHEL: Come on. +RACHEL: Hey, hi! +RACHEL: Can you tell it to me when you’re getting me some iced tea? +RACHEL: Look at you making up crap for me. +RACHEL: Ohhh! +RACHEL: oh oh! +RACHEL: Tell her to wear her own earrings. +RACHEL: My lucky dress wasn’t working out to well for me, but for four years, this baby never missed. +RACHEL: Is that him again? +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Phoebe, I'm going to Ross's wedding because he is my ex-boyfriend. +RACHEL: I did the windows, I did the floors. +RACHEL: No-no, seriously-seriously, what was the especially me part about? +RACHEL: Goodnight. +RACHEL: Oh, but once you find it, ohh it's so worth the wait. +RACHEL: Yeah, we found them. +RACHEL: And oh, she's also in this phase where if you leave the room, she screams bloody murder, but ah. +RACHEL: Ross, I really don’t think… Hey Joey, can I… Actually, I just wanna talk to Tag. +RACHEL: It’s Rachel! +RACHEL: Now?! +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Yeah, well Betty’s kinda sad. +RACHEL: Maybe I should go! +RACHEL: Potato Head. +RACHEL: Does anybody need more coffee? +RACHEL: You telling people about me? +RACHEL: Seriously, good night! +RACHEL: No, hey, come on, if he asked you first, that’s only fair. +RACHEL: Really! +RACHEL: Who is being loud? +RACHEL: We should call my mum's house and say goodnight to Emma before she goes down. +RACHEL: All right. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: I know, I lied! +RACHEL: No. +RACHEL: Please, just wear what I suggest, and she’s gonna go nuts for you. +RACHEL: And who is this chippy? +RACHEL: Oh my God, look there's Roy Gublik. +RACHEL: So, um, will you bring the truck? +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Oh, that's pretty. +RACHEL: Ye-, no, my Uncle Hi. +RACHEL: Yeah, like a chimney. +RACHEL: Get over it soldier, we've gotta do this! +RACHEL: Did you know that something really boring happened to someone really ugly in the Middle Ages? +RACHEL: Oh but look! +RACHEL: Better than Chandler. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh, no, no! +RACHEL: Au revoir! +RACHEL: That’s how it got fixed! +RACHEL: Oh, wait Ross! +RACHEL: But Erin Brockovich had her own house. +RACHEL: Handling it? +RACHEL: God, could you imagine if I actually married him?! +RACHEL: How's it going? +RACHEL: We’re gonna flip a coin! +RACHEL: Get up, get up, get up, get up, get up! +RACHEL: What?! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: That's it! +RACHEL: Yay! +RACHEL: Hey, how's it going. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Days of Our Lives, thank you very much. +RACHEL: Fine. +RACHEL: God! +RACHEL: Look at this mess, Tag! +RACHEL: Your T. V. The chairs. +RACHEL: Yes, but you can not tell Ross 'cause I want to surprise him. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: Noo. +RACHEL: No! +RACHEL: That Paolo thing was barely a relationship. +RACHEL: I needed my lucky dress. +RACHEL: Oh, Very funny. +RACHEL: There's no orange juice in there! +RACHEL: Hey guys, how was the movie? +RACHEL: Y’know, that this thing has speakers in the headrest! +RACHEL: How come you are?! +RACHEL: Oh yes! +RACHEL: I knew it! +RACHEL: Oh, come on! +RACHEL: Hey Phoebs. +RACHEL: You’re a 30 year old virgin! +RACHEL: Enough out of you! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Gay? +RACHEL: Joey, it’s just a chair! +RACHEL: Oh, hey! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Well, Phoebe that’s fine because I’m not moving. +RACHEL: Well uh, his answering machine was very understanding. +RACHEL: We're not even there. +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: I really appreciate that but I think I’m just gonna take Sebastian to the charity. +RACHEL: Then you're not gonna like what's coming. +RACHEL: Ok, who ordered what? +RACHEL: I don't know! +RACHEL: Hey, Mr. Treeger. +RACHEL: Oh, now see that’s a fancy but. +RACHEL: I know! +RACHEL: Get out! +RACHEL: No, no, ACC-cept that. +RACHEL: I dare ya! +RACHEL: Oww! +RACHEL: Yeah, but I'm not gonna hear from that for a couple of days. +RACHEL: Umm what?! +RACHEL: Come on its late, we’re not gonna go down to the office. +RACHEL: I am soo gonna marry that guy. +RACHEL: Wait a minute. +RACHEL: Ross! +RACHEL: Alright, you guys. +RACHEL: Well, let me just check that with what I got here, all right see 038 is not the number for this store, 038 is Atlanta. +RACHEL: Is he? +RACHEL: Eh. +RACHEL: Joey, God, your apartment is like a hundred degrees! +RACHEL: No, everything’s fine. +RACHEL: Well, h-how is this like that? +RACHEL: Ha! +RACHEL: Was this okay? +RACHEL: You don’t guess, you buy! +RACHEL: Um, Pheebs, so, you guys just don't get along? +RACHEL: Thank you. +RACHEL: Ready to go to the movies? +RACHEL: Okay? +RACHEL: And then, oh, god, and then we just sort of sunk into it. +RACHEL: Hello. +RACHEL: What? +RACHEL: I never really wanted to marry Joey, okay? +RACHEL: Oh-ho! +RACHEL: Hey uhm, do you remember that one really great time? +RACHEL: Ohh. +RACHEL: What’s up? +RACHEL: Do you believe they are actually getting married? +RACHEL: What are you guys doing? +RACHEL: Great pizza. +RACHEL: Ooh, I just wish we hadn’t lost those four months, but if time was what you needed just to gain a little perspective. +RACHEL: Why? +RACHEL: You just took all the words! +RACHEL: I’m making him a very fancy meal. +RACHEL: Um, Russ, you ready? +RACHEL: Or something! +RACHEL: See? +RACHEL: Oh daddy! +RACHEL: Who is it? +RACHEL: Aah! +RACHEL: Get the camera, it’s in the diaper bag. +RACHEL: Yeah, right. +RACHEL: Macadamia nut? +RACHEL: Oh no! +RACHEL: Umm. +RACHEL: Well what happened at dinner? +RACHEL: It's just, when I see them together, sometimes I just get a little jealous! +RACHEL: So umm, you’re gonna stay with me as long as I need you? +RACHEL: Did Mark call? +RACHEL: We would like some more beers. +RACHEL: You know Ross and I are not in. +RACHEL: That's the difference! +RACHEL: Well, y’know what? +RACHEL: ‘Cos I was gonna say there’s no way you could’ve done the end the way you guys did it back then! +RACHEL: Why didn't you get it? +RACHEL: Okay, see? +RACHEL: How was she? +RACHEL: I was laughed out of twelve interviews today. +RACHEL: Ohh, nothing, I just wanted to see you. +RACHEL: Come on Joey sex me up! +RACHEL: So uh, what are you guys doing for dinner tonight? +RACHEL: Okay Joey, first of all Kash Ford is not people. +RACHEL: Well hello! +RACHEL: Ohh. +RACHEL: Stop it! +RACHEL: Oh, I don't know, I guess, Chris O'Donnel, John F. Kennedy, Jr, Daniel Day Lewis, Sting, and Parker Stevenson. +RACHEL: Hey! +RACHEL: Oh my God! +RACHEL: Joey, what are you doing with the bag? +RACHEL: How do we fairly decide who gets the phone? +RACHEL: Monica. +RACHEL: Uh-huh. +RACHEL: Well y’know, I don’t want you to be cold. +RACHEL: Don’t you think? +RACHEL: Okay, Pheebs, quick, what shoes should I wear? +RACHEL: Well, I've brought some books. +RACHEL: Sorry! +RACHEL: You can borrow it, by the way. +RACHEL: I have a crush on you I am attracted to you. +RACHEL: Oh, great! +RACHEL: It's me. +RACHEL: Look. +RACHEL: That’s. +RACHEL: Well, we’re a little early, the lecture doesn’t end for 15 minutes. +RACHEL: I got the interview! +RACHEL: Eavesdropping. +RACHEL: Hi mum, put her back on! +RACHEL: Just play along at least! +RACHEL: Okay! +RACHEL: Come sit here, you protect me. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Huh, Bob Sagett? +RACHEL: That is the most ridiculous. +RACHEL: Does anybody wanna trade? +RACHEL: Umm… II…uh, wow. +RACHEL: Joey look, just look at it this way, the sooner Phoebe breaks Chandler the sooner this is all over and out in the open. +RACHEL: Oh, you poor little famous man. +RACHEL: Do you not like all dogs? +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: It’s-it’s not like I love him, it’s just physical! +RACHEL: I'm sorry, as I was saying the store number is wrong, and I'm sorry but that's. +RACHEL: Wow. +RACHEL: He was a hamster! +RACHEL: So Ross, we went out for two years, and you never told me you were in an I Hate Rachel club. +RACHEL: I’m not gonna be able to do that for so long, and it’s so much fun! +RACHEL: Where ya going? +RACHEL: What's the matter? +RACHEL: Aww, look at the little thing. +RACHEL: Ohh! +RACHEL: Are you serious? +RACHEL: Oh, sorry! +RACHEL: Oh god, oh my god! +RACHEL: Really? +RACHEL: Yes! +RACHEL: Yeah uh, y'know what uh, let's skip it. +RACHEL: Ross, Joey is not here. +RACHEL: Hi! +RACHEL: Oh, come on, would you just grab my ass. +RACHEL: You do what the hand says! +RACHEL: I can’t! +RACHEL: Yeah. +RACHEL: Um, Barry. +RACHEL: I'm not gonna go see your ex-boyfriend! +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: Okay. +RACHEL: Right! +RACHEL: Just some boys gave me their phone numbers. +RACHEL: Yeah, why is it so hard for you to believe?! +RACHEL: All right, I’ll see you guys later. +RACHEL: Oh, hi. +RACHEL: Oh! +RACHEL: I’ll give you ten free Ralph Lauren shirts. +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: That was some-something huh? +RACHEL: First there’s a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then custard, which I made from scratch. +RACHEL: Have at it. +RACHEL: Yeah, they were very y'know wrestley. +RACHEL: I use my breasts to get other people's attention. +RACHEL: Ohhhh, I cannot look at it! +RACHEL: That’s right, he can have his job back. +RACHEL: Do you not want me here? +RACHEL: Oh thank you so much Mr. Kaplan, thank you so much. +RACHEL: No, it wasn't. +RACHEL: Finally, I have someone I can pass on my wisdom too. +RACHEL: Oh God, oh. +RACHEL: It wouldn't have mattered anyway, Phoebe, you and I are, are gonna live together, we're roommates that's the deal. +RACHEL: That's it! +RACHEL: Oh God! +RACHEL: And then when they do it, they’re left with a big black pencil line right down the center of their face. +RACHEL: Wow! +RACHEL: Yeah, I know. +RACHEL: I'm sorry. +RACHEL: Well, congratulations, so do you love her? +RACHEL: Oh. +RACHEL: Ughh! +RACHEL: And I was thinking Claire Danes. +RACHEL: Joey! +RACHEL: I'm gonna go get one of those job things. +RACHEL: Joey, come on! +RACHEL: Joey. +RACHEL: I was so afraid I wasn't gonna remember any of my high-school French, but I understood every word you just said! +RACHEL: No, that's ok, let's me just get my check book! +RACHEL: I mean it's like, III like that you're not involved in that part of my life. +RACHEL: So you’re saying they just slid out of your bottom drawer, crawled across the floor, then jumped on to my desk?! +RACHEL: This one? +RACHEL: No, of course, of course I’ve heard of them! +RACHEL: No? +RACHEL: We can’t find Chandler…—‘s vest. \ No newline at end of file