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i have a bachelor's in public health ummm which i decided about well i realized i should say i realized about three quarters of the way through my bachelor's that uhhh it wasn't a job that i could do for the rest of my life i mean there were a lot of different
| 52.77 |
speaker1
| 39.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
ummm settings in which a public health major can work but most of them do sort of msw kind of jobs masters in social work kind of jobs and part of my job that internship that summer was to ummm call we had like almost four hundred diabetics known diabetics in the clinic i worked in a community health clinic and part of my job was to call them once a month and and invite them to this free like diabetes fair where they would get they'd see a pediatrist and nutritionist and a regular an othmagist so i mean those visits alone would take up like multiple hours of their week not to mention the cost of going to see all those those specialists we were offing them for free plus free food and other free stuff like you know blood sugar monitoring all kinds of free services and i could not get fifteen people out of four hundred to show up for these damn things and it was just i'm like i can't do this for the rest of my life so before i was even done with my bachelor's i was looking for a master's program to get me out of that bachelor's like to get me out of that work space because i knew i'd just be a real asshole like nobody would like me if i did that for a job so that's how i ended up here
| 126.07 |
speaker1
| 53.81 |
session_53fe77c9
|
ummm
| 127.22 |
speaker2
| 125.46 |
session_53fe77c9
|
so wait uhhh going back to what what exactly were i i started thinking about something else and what couldn't you get only fifteen people out of four hundred
| 139.17 |
speaker2
| 127.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
it was a free diabetes workshop basically so like these people were already diabetics most of them poorly uhhh poorly controlled diabetics which you know i don't know how much you know about diabetes but diabetes malitis uhhh is a pretty slow and relatively painful death ummm you know like multiystem organ failure is usually the end of the line and it's not that that's particularly painful but it's very uncomfortable what's painful well actually okay so it's not painful it's uncomfortable and it's slow and it's disgusting like people lose their legs their feet their fingers they lose they go blind and then like i said most of them or multiystem organ failure their kidneys shut down their liver shuts down eventually you know their heart shuts down so it's really not nice it's not not a nice way to die
| 188.42 |
speaker1
| 137.86 |
session_53fe77c9
|
so you had a pool of four hundred diabetics and only fifteen people showed up for a bunch of free service
| 192.92 |
speaker2
| 187.21 |
session_53fe77c9
|
i couldn't get fifteen people to show up for a bunch of free service i could get like four
| 197.77 |
speaker1
| 191.71 |
session_53fe77c9
|
hmmm
| 194.47 |
speaker2
| 194.01 |
session_53fe77c9
|
yeah
| 196.02 |
speaker2
| 195.21 |
session_53fe77c9
|
that seems so weird to me 'cause i mean this this is something i mean right now obviously healthcare public healthcare is a huge topic obviously ummm
| 208.77 |
speaker2
| 197.21 |
session_53fe77c9
|
i don't know so that seems like it seems like so conary to you know if it's available you would yeah you would think people would use it but then if it's available and people don't use it what does that say about like actually putting forth a public health file
| 222.12 |
speaker2
| 209.71 |
session_53fe77c9
|
well you know it all depends on what you're talking about if you're talking about for instance uhhh breast cancer screening or prostate cancer screening for some reason those sorts of things ummm even bowel can cancer screenings ummm
| 235.62 |
speaker1
| 221.61 |
session_53fe77c9
|
are a lot it's a lot easier to nail people down you know maybe it's because they're i don't know i actually don't know ummm the problem with one of the problems with diabetes is that it is it is a whole lifestyle problem and it is something that will like the treatment and management of diabetes is going to change your life as you know it you cannot continue on this road you're going to have to at least check your blood sugar a few times a day and then administer insulin if you're not going to change your diet start exercising if you're not going to make different lifestyle choices you still your lifestyle will still change whereas
| 275.52 |
speaker1
| 236.21 |
session_53fe77c9
|
somebody can go for a polish screening and have their bowels checked for for pre cancer cells and that doesn't change their lifestyle having the screen doesn't change their lifestyle if you have cancer now that changes your lifestyle ummm so for some reason those things like screenings are relatively it's relatively simple comparatively to get people to show up for it but once they're sick with something that is going to change every day like every aspect of every day of the rest of their lives maybe that's the problem i don't know but it's not like well and i guess that's maybe education is a problem too and ummm is that they really don't understand they don't understand that diabetes will kill them it's not a question of if it's a question of when ummm and it there's just there's there's nothing else it's got to kill them ummm so if they don't change their lifestyle which they don't want to do because nobody wants to change their lifestyle everybody likes their coffee and their donut their like sit and watch t v and people like the way they live or they're or they don't like the idea of changing people hate change i don't really know what it is they they have a whole there's a whole other crew of people who
| 350.12 |
speaker1
| 276.26 |
session_53fe77c9
|
ummm study the psychology of disease and motivation for change and they look at smoking cssation they look at alcohol and drug rebilitation they look at i mean you name it you name the problem there are people who are ummm their entire job is to try and figure out different models of ways to convince people that what they're doing is stupid and they need to make better choices but smoking is a good example
| 379.77 |
speaker1
| 350.71 |
session_53fe77c9
|
smoking kills it's not like you don't know every time you put a cigarette in your mouth and light it you know but people still do it it causes emeymap d cancer you know it stains your teeth it makes you stink i mean there's just so many factors and yet you know and i mean even after big tobac it's not like we don't know in the fifties we didn't know in the thirties we didn't know but now we know more than we need to know and yet we still have new smokers we still have old smokers we still have people who refuse to quit so like i said it's it's there are people whose jobs it is just to try and find like teaching models and learning models and different ways to convince people that their behavior in relation to their health isn't giving
| 422.02 |
speaker1
| 380.46 |
session_53fe77c9
|
i don't really know but yeah it doesn't it doesn't make any sense
| 426.17 |
speaker1
| 422.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
so i i'm in chatty pants go ahead ask a question
| 431.37 |
speaker1
| 427.21 |
session_53fe77c9
|
ummm do you uhhh do you have diabetes is that one of the re or
| 435.32 |
speaker2
| 429.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
no no no no i just know a lot about it partially because i worked in the clinic and partially because pretty much everything i've done since two thousand and two has been health or medicine related so i did ummm i worked in psych for five years uhhh i worked outpatient inpatient adult uhhh pediatric well they were actually teenagers ummm so adoles and then i did psych testing for a short stint so i pretty much did just about everything that a psychiatric technician can do ummm and i liked it uhhh but i talk too much so i'm not a very good therapist and inpatient
| 474.97 |
speaker1
| 434.91 |
session_53fe77c9
|
do you work with mental health at all or
| 447.57 |
speaker2
| 445.21 |
session_53fe77c9
|
yeah
| 452.77 |
speaker2
| 452.21 |
session_53fe77c9
|
while it can be very fulfilling i noticed that i needed i need my job to give me
| 484.52 |
speaker1
| 475.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
in return for my work i need to be able to see that i have done work i need to i need to have a measur quantifiable proof that i have done something today and psych is not the place for that because you can sit down with every single patient on your unit and you can talk until you're blue in the face and
| 506.17 |
speaker1
| 487.06 |
session_53fe77c9
|
nothing changes necessarily i mean you could you could change lives just by sitting down and talking to someone just by acknowledging that they're alive but
| 514.12 |
speaker1
| 506.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
most of the time you could sit down and talk to every single one of them and it's going to be the same same people same bullshit the next day as it was today so i i knew i discovered during my i was in the army at the time during my time in the army i discovered that something that i needed from my job was a quantifiable response was something i could say okay well this is what i accomplished today good for me you know
| 537.02 |
speaker1
| 514.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
uhhh
| 535.47 |
speaker2
| 534.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
yeah no i i get that feeling a lot of the time too ummm just even in terms of the study like seeing the progression of interviews that are collected each day it's like okay numbers are increasing we're collecting something
| 550.62 |
speaker2
| 536.26 |
session_53fe77c9
|
sure something's happening i have accomplished x even if it's a very small x it's still something that you can quantify and you and i think that that's i think it's pretty normal i think it's one of the reasons that we have so much yuppy flu and so many people who come you know they they do it the way they're supposed to do it they're seventeen eighteen years old they go straight from there they go to college they get a degree they go straight from there they find some corporate job and a wife and you know a husband and they have kids and they have a thing and then they're thirty five and they're miserable and they're divorced and they have you know they're single parents and you know they've got all this debt piled up you know and they're living outside of their means and they i think that a lot of that thative consumerism living outside one's means the extreme divorce rate suicide rates alcohollism drug abuse among people who seemingly have everything they need is because they can't measure not just because but partially because they can't measure what they've done in a day they can't say this is what i do for a living you know used to be you know your grand your grandfather built chairs and even if he only built five chairs a week he built five chairs a week and those are my chairs and they're sturdy and you can sit on them for your whole life and they're never going to break you know now we've moved over to this society where nobody has any autonomy and nobody i shouldn't say nobody most people have very little autonomy most people have very little quantifiable solid thing to say i've accomplished something in my day and we fill our lives with things we fill our lives with schedules and stuff and
| 652.27 |
speaker1
| 550.11 |
session_53fe77c9
|
yeah
| 552.17 |
speaker2
| 551.76 |
session_53fe77c9
|
things that there's there's no ummm nothing tangible about our lives at all you know and i think that's a huge part of the problem but i think a lot of things i have a lot of opinions
| 666.82 |
speaker1
| 653.71 |
session_53fe77c9
|
yeah uhhh do you you seem uhhh like possibly the type of person who would identify with uhhh i guess what i would call my sort of brain activity which is that it's just like constantly constantly running like do you ever ever have a problem of like not being able to shut down your brain
| 688.42 |
speaker2
| 666.41 |
session_53fe77c9
|
i used to ummm i've learned 'cause i'm also like a relatively low stress individual even though i know when i'm talking what happens when i'm talking is if i'm talking about something especially something that i feel relatively strongly about what is happening as i am speaking is that influences are pouring in from all sorts of different you know 'cause i have a psych background and i have a medical background and i you know and obviously i know people and i've seen the way that their lives work and all you know so all these influences are just sort of dumping like into the funnel that goes straight to my mouth ummm as far shutting down my brain i've had to learn 'cause i used to have insoma issues and that was when the yeah yeah you know what this might help this is it sounds like the weirdest thing in the world but this might help if you ummm if you can visualize like you're laying in bed and you can't sleep when you can't sleep when you can't sleep and so what i used to do was i would like close my eyes and pretend it was a blackboard and just wipe it clean completely clean now it's just a blackboard there's nothing there's no sound turn off you know just find a volume knob somewhere it's in there find a volume knob turn it off turn the lights off it's completely black pull up a television screen this sounds so weird saying it out loud and find a channel find a channel that's like your favorite place in the world that's quiet where there's no sound except maybe the wind and if it starts if something creeps in and all of a sudden it's like here's your best friend talking at you change the channel and find a you know an ocean a mountain you know a field of daisies find something quiet and serene when that stopped working
| 788.27 |
speaker1
| 687.06 |
session_53fe77c9
|
since i was a kid
| 729.57 |
speaker2
| 728.91 |
session_53fe77c9
|
so weird to tell you this when that stopped working what i had is kind of like that that sign on the building that ticker that's running ummm i had a ticker that said sleep and that's all it said it just ran through my head until i went to sleep and it you know if like i said if something starts creeping in you just turn the volume off you know something a picture starts creeping in change the channel find the ticker
| 812.02 |
speaker1
| 789.31 |
session_53fe77c9
|
it sounds weird but it really worked and it took me a while to perfect it but it works
| 818.77 |
speaker1
| 812.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
hmmm
| 817.02 |
speaker2
| 815.06 |
session_53fe77c9
|
yeah the most the closest thing that i can think of is i started doing this on on tour uhhh because you know a lot of sleeping on floors and stuff like that ummm but i started basically blanking my mind out and then instead of changing the channel when the when stuff starts coming in just let it float and just let it just let it transform into whatever it transforms into and then that starts like a dream process and thatlows me down
| 849.97 |
speaker2
| 818.16 |
session_53fe77c9
|
okay oh okay yeah that sounds yeah that sounds like that would work too
| 852.52 |
speaker1
| 846.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
yeah did you have problems with insoma as a kid too
| 856.27 |
speaker2
| 851.96 |
session_53fe77c9
|
ummm
| 857.27 |
speaker1
| 855.86 |
session_53fe77c9
|
i don't know i don't really remember that much about being a kid i remember like always having a very vivid like dream state very i used to have a very vivid dream now i don't remember any of my dreams hardly unless i'm dreaming like as i'm waking up ummm
| 873.52 |
speaker1
| 858.46 |
session_53fe77c9
|
very vivid imagination i've always been a talker so i don't really know i don't remember having problems until i was in like junior high school but then that could've been just because i had a phone in my room and i was on the phone with my stupid friends all night so i don't know
| 888.32 |
speaker1
| 874.51 |
session_53fe77c9
|
alright well we should move on to the transcript reading it will be the same as it was last time same actual sentences and everything ummm all right you ready
| 901.48 |
speaker2
| 887.61 |
session_53fe77c9
|
forget every time
| 23 |
speaker1
| 21.5 |
session_551f808e
|
what rena what this this like this
| 35.41 |
speaker2
| 29.52 |
session_551f808e
|
ah sabotage
| 51.4 |
speaker4
| 50.04 |
session_551f808e
|
okay
| 65.98 |
speaker1
| 65.84 |
session_551f808e
|
keep
| 67.41 |
speaker4
| 67.28 |
session_551f808e
|
an
| 67.67 |
speaker3
| 67.52 |
session_551f808e
|
eyenie i'm
| 68.43 |
speaker1
| 67.68 |
session_551f808e
|
dropping
| 69.04 |
speaker4
| 68.44 |
session_551f808e
|
seem doesn't
| 71.99 |
speaker2
| 69.72 |
session_551f808e
|
seem yeah't seem
| 75.35 |
speaker1
| 72 |
session_551f808e
|
slippery
| 75.95 |
speaker3
| 75.36 |
session_551f808e
|
ba
| 76.27 |
speaker2
| 75.96 |
session_551f808e
|
sweater
| 76.87 |
speaker1
| 76.28 |
session_551f808e
|
maybe
| 77.11 |
speaker4
| 76.88 |
session_551f808e
|
if i said it here on this brian thing are they on yeah on
| 85.36 |
speaker1
| 77.12 |
session_551f808e
|
what
| 91.43 |
speaker4
| 91.24 |
session_551f808e
|
day
| 91.67 |
speaker3
| 91.44 |
session_551f808e
|
is it tday he
| 108.31 |
speaker4
| 91.68 |
session_551f808e
|
wants to by summary
| 110.1 |
speaker2
| 108.32 |
session_551f808e
|
no that
| 115.59 |
speaker4
| 115.32 |
session_551f808e
|
was
| 115.67 |
speaker1
| 115.6 |
session_551f808e
|
just summary no no
| 118.92 |
speaker4
| 115.68 |
session_551f808e
|
but
| 120.8 |
speaker2
| 120.2 |
session_551f808e
|
okay
| 121.34 |
speaker1
| 121.2 |
session_551f808e
|
oh right the summer okay okay
| 126.82 |
speaker4
| 123.12 |
session_551f808e
|
have
| 128.59 |
speaker1
| 128.4 |
session_551f808e
|
you changed the
| 129.87 |
speaker2
| 128.6 |
session_551f808e
|
i did i was trying to i didn't have privileges to get in to update your file actually meant to send the e mail and then i just didn't get
| 140.52 |
speaker4
| 129.88 |
session_551f808e
|
when when you said at the beginning i thought must
| 143.24 |
speaker2
| 140.68 |
session_551f808e
|
and then i forget mine as well and it's just like you know every time i put something in there so yeah i was yeah that was the main thing so ummm as soon as that's in it'll be ready i was making a couple of little changes as well so so those'll be able to play with still working on the trying to get the topics and summary search implemented as well so that's
| 162.46 |
speaker4
| 144.28 |
session_551f808e
|
that's
| 163.43 |
speaker2
| 163.2 |
session_551f808e
|
sort of tonight so yeah other than that it's sort of come along getting a better feel for all these night objects it's just seems a little chaos
| 177.6 |
speaker4
| 163.44 |
session_551f808e
|
so i
| 180.31 |
speaker3
| 179.4 |
session_551f808e
|
know
| 180.47 |
speaker2
| 180.32 |
session_551f808e
|
it's it's like if you're gonna use this stuff later on in your life then you spend the time to invest and learn all about them but it's like what's the minimum i can get away get what we need
| 189.27 |
speaker4
| 180.48 |
session_551f808e
|
so it's
| 189.79 |
speaker3
| 189.28 |
session_551f808e
|
like i don't know unless i want to do something with this in the future
| 193.46 |
speaker4
| 189.8 |
session_551f808e
|
pe year
| 198.16 |
speaker1
| 197.24 |
session_551f808e
|
i' know anyway so yeah that's about that
| 203.19 |
speaker4
| 200.6 |
session_551f808e
|
there
| 203.35 |
speaker1
| 203.2 |
session_551f808e
|
is a file in the directory called disfal
| 206.67 |
speaker2
| 203.36 |
session_551f808e
|
what
| 209.6 |
speaker1
| 209 |
session_551f808e
|
sent excel
| 210.68 |
speaker4
| 209.76 |
session_551f808e
|
i
| 211.15 |
speaker3
| 211.04 |
session_551f808e
|
think i saw that and i'm just trying to remember if i did create it think create because i was trying some stuff a couple weeks ago so that may be mine
| 222.05 |
speaker4
| 211.16 |
session_551f808e
|
doesn't have anything in it really it does it has about three lines of xml that didn't do much
| 228.83 |
speaker3
| 224.08 |
session_551f808e
|
yeah that's right
| 229.55 |
speaker4
| 228.84 |
session_551f808e
|
okay
| 230.16 |
speaker2
| 229.56 |
session_551f808e
|
yeah cause i saw it again today but y'al yeah that just sure it
| 240.75 |
speaker4
| 230.24 |
session_551f808e
|
just seems
| 241.15 |
speaker3
| 240.76 |
session_551f808e
|
to be
| 241.35 |
speaker2
| 241.16 |
session_551f808e
|
occupied space soigh doesn't matter
| 243.24 |
speaker3
| 241.36 |
session_551f808e
|
false impressions of what happens going on
| 247.47 |
speaker4
| 244.2 |
session_551f808e
|
i had lots of stuff in there yesterday stuff
| 252.59 |
speaker3
| 247.48 |
session_551f808e
|
jobs
| 253.2 |
speaker4
| 252.6 |
session_551f808e
|
they live there but there i had even more stuff there i was on zipping all these kind of crazy huge things that were i needed them they were for this though it's alrigh i
| 262.47 |
speaker3
| 253.48 |
session_551f808e
|
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