JackBAI/bert_pretrain_datasets · Datasets at Hugging Face

text stringlengths 1 461k
either , '' he murmurs .
`` this is going to sting , '' i warn him , as i pat the gashes on his hands with the soaked gauze .
he hisses slightly as the liquid stings him , but does n't move .
i slide my other hand under his , to stabilize it as i cleanse the wound of dirt .
i 've never touched him this long before .
`` other hand . ''
he switches hands and i go to work cleaning the other one .
`` maybe you should take a little time off from training , '' i suggest quietly .
`` or i could just work out my leg muscles , '' he says , and i look up to see a wry grin on his face .
`` mmm , '' i murmur , smiling too .
`` you know , '' i go on , a bit more bravely , `` i heard that only one varsity athlete got a lawn room , because sports are such a time commitment , much less a two-sport athlete- '' `` do n't do that , '' he grunts .
`` i do n't want your pity . ''
`` it 's not pity , it 's facts . ''
`` i was born with everything , i have no excuse for not achieving my all of goals . ''
`` where did you hear that ?
it sounds like- '' i break off , feeling him stiffen under my touch .
i was going to say his father but i can tell he does n't want me to go there .
`` you 're just really hard on yourself , that 's all , '' i say instead .
i gently dab some neosporin onto the cuts .
`` i know what everyone sees when they look at me , '' he replies quietly .
`` entitled ... born with a silver spoon in my mouth ... i work as hard as i do so that no one can say i succeed because of my family 's wealth . ''
i frown .
that 's half of the equation i think , but it seems like he does n't see how hard his father pushes him .
`` i got a little bit of that at work the other day , '' i say , wondering if it 's ok to broach the topic of the internship he wanted .
i take a dry piece of gauze and cover his palm with it before picking up the tape and beginning to wrap it around his hand .
`` when they found out i was pierce 's stepdaughter , i mean .
feels weird . ''
`` your first experience of nepotism ? ''
`` yeah , '' i say with a smile .
`` actually , my mom once got me a part-time job as the receptionist at the salon where she used to work , so i guess that 's not true . ''
`` where does your dad work ? ''
`` no idea .
probably a repair shop somewhere .
he 's a mechanic , or he was .
last time we heard from him was several years ago .
he was in florida then , but he never stays in one place very long . ''
`` so you 're the first in your family to go to college , '' he observes , as i finish taping one hand and move to the other .
`` yep . ''
`` is that why you 're so serious ? ''
`` am i ? ''
i ask , my eyes moving up to his .
`` serious is n't the right word ... distant , maybe . ''
`` distant ?
that 's worse , '' i reply , feeling a little hurt .
`` i did n't mean to insult you .
i 'm just trying to figure you out .
we were really in class together ?
which one ? ''
`` there were three .
the first was this american history survey class freshman year . ''
`` professor michaels ? ''
`` yeah .
i always sat behind you , though .
i 'm not surprised you did n't see me , '' i say , pressing down slightly as i finish wrapping his hands .
`` i am , '' he replies .
i glance up sharply , but his eyes are n't focused on my face .
they 're looking at my body , which i now realize is quite exposed in my thin , white cotton nightie .
i completely forgot i was wearing it .
there 's a moment of silence , and i suddenly become very aware of every inch of myself , and every inch of him .
his smell of sweat , beads of it still dripping forward down his chest , through a smattering of hair between his nipples .
allison 's face appears in my mind , and i 'm reminded of what she said .
`` i 'm done . ''
`` what ? ''
he says , his eyes pulling up to mine .
`` with your hands .
i 'm done . ''
`` right . ''
i grab a glass from the cabinet and pour him some water from the faucet .
`` here , you felt dizzy because you 're dehydrated . ''
`` thanks , '' he says .
he reaches for the glass with his left hand , which is closer , and then pauses and takes it awkwardly with his right .
`` what was that ? ''
i ask , frowning .
`` what ? ''
`` let me see your left arm , '' i reply , reaching for him , but he pulls back .
`` no , no , it 's nothing . ''
`` what is ? ''
`` my shoulder .
it 's just a little tendonitis . ''
`` oh really ?
did a doctor tell you that ? ''
`` not exactly . ''
`` webmd ? ''
i ask , raising my eyebrows .
he shrugs , then winces .
`` you need to take better care of yourself .
you ca n't keep pushing yourself so hard . ''
he frowns , and does n't respond .
`` well , at least take some tylenol for the pain , '' i add as i pour two pills into my hand and begin to repack the first aid kit with the other .
`` that 's ok. '' i tilt my head at him .
`` pain is n't going to make you heal any faster , '' i point out .
`` fine , '' he says with a little smile .
i blush as his fingertips scrape my palm as he takes the pills .
`` well .
i think i 'm going back to bed .
i 'm supposed to check out some of the smithsonian museums later , so ... '' i trail off , feeling awkward now .
`` ok , see you later , '' he says , turning toward the back door .
i pause for a moment , then head back toward the staircase .
just like that , the one real conversation that my stepbrother and i have ever had is over .
i could practically feel him closing back up at the end there .

either , '' he murmurs .

`` this is going to sting , '' i warn him , as i pat the gashes on his hands with the soaked gauze .

he hisses slightly as the liquid stings him , but does n't move .

i slide my other hand under his , to stabilize it as i cleanse the wound of dirt .

i 've never touched him this long before .

`` other hand . ''

he switches hands and i go to work cleaning the other one .

`` maybe you should take a little time off from training , '' i suggest quietly .

`` or i could just work out my leg muscles , '' he says , and i look up to see a wry grin on his face .

`` mmm , '' i murmur , smiling too .

`` you know , '' i go on , a bit more bravely , `` i heard that only one varsity athlete got a lawn room , because sports are such a time commitment , much less a two-sport athlete- '' `` do n't do that , '' he grunts .

`` i do n't want your pity . ''

`` it 's not pity , it 's facts . ''

`` i was born with everything , i have no excuse for not achieving my all of goals . ''

`` where did you hear that ?

it sounds like- '' i break off , feeling him stiffen under my touch .

i was going to say his father but i can tell he does n't want me to go there .

`` you 're just really hard on yourself , that 's all , '' i say instead .

i gently dab some neosporin onto the cuts .

`` i know what everyone sees when they look at me , '' he replies quietly .

`` entitled ... born with a silver spoon in my mouth ... i work as hard as i do so that no one can say i succeed because of my family 's wealth . ''

i frown .

that 's half of the equation i think , but it seems like he does n't see how hard his father pushes him .

`` i got a little bit of that at work the other day , '' i say , wondering if it 's ok to broach the topic of the internship he wanted .

i take a dry piece of gauze and cover his palm with it before picking up the tape and beginning to wrap it around his hand .

`` when they found out i was pierce 's stepdaughter , i mean .

feels weird . ''

`` your first experience of nepotism ? ''

`` yeah , '' i say with a smile .

`` actually , my mom once got me a part-time job as the receptionist at the salon where she used to work , so i guess that 's not true . ''

`` where does your dad work ? ''

`` no idea .

probably a repair shop somewhere .

he 's a mechanic , or he was .

last time we heard from him was several years ago .

he was in florida then , but he never stays in one place very long . ''

`` so you 're the first in your family to go to college , '' he observes , as i finish taping one hand and move to the other .

`` yep . ''

`` is that why you 're so serious ? ''

`` am i ? ''

i ask , my eyes moving up to his .

`` serious is n't the right word ... distant , maybe . ''

`` distant ?

that 's worse , '' i reply , feeling a little hurt .

`` i did n't mean to insult you .

i 'm just trying to figure you out .

we were really in class together ?

which one ? ''

`` there were three .

the first was this american history survey class freshman year . ''

`` professor michaels ? ''

`` yeah .

i always sat behind you , though .

i 'm not surprised you did n't see me , '' i say , pressing down slightly as i finish wrapping his hands .

`` i am , '' he replies .

i glance up sharply , but his eyes are n't focused on my face .

they 're looking at my body , which i now realize is quite exposed in my thin , white cotton nightie .

i completely forgot i was wearing it .

there 's a moment of silence , and i suddenly become very aware of every inch of myself , and every inch of him .

his smell of sweat , beads of it still dripping forward down his chest , through a smattering of hair between his nipples .

allison 's face appears in my mind , and i 'm reminded of what she said .

`` i 'm done . ''

`` what ? ''

he says , his eyes pulling up to mine .

`` with your hands .

i 'm done . ''

`` right . ''

i grab a glass from the cabinet and pour him some water from the faucet .

`` here , you felt dizzy because you 're dehydrated . ''

`` thanks , '' he says .

he reaches for the glass with his left hand , which is closer , and then pauses and takes it awkwardly with his right .

`` what was that ? ''

i ask , frowning .

`` what ? ''

`` let me see your left arm , '' i reply , reaching for him , but he pulls back .

`` no , no , it 's nothing . ''

`` what is ? ''

`` my shoulder .

it 's just a little tendonitis . ''

`` oh really ?

did a doctor tell you that ? ''

`` not exactly . ''

`` webmd ? ''

i ask , raising my eyebrows .

he shrugs , then winces .

`` you need to take better care of yourself .

you ca n't keep pushing yourself so hard . ''

he frowns , and does n't respond .

`` well , at least take some tylenol for the pain , '' i add as i pour two pills into my hand and begin to repack the first aid kit with the other .

`` that 's ok. '' i tilt my head at him .

`` pain is n't going to make you heal any faster , '' i point out .

`` fine , '' he says with a little smile .

i blush as his fingertips scrape my palm as he takes the pills .

`` well .

i think i 'm going back to bed .

i 'm supposed to check out some of the smithsonian museums later , so ... '' i trail off , feeling awkward now .

`` ok , see you later , '' he says , turning toward the back door .

i pause for a moment , then head back toward the staircase .

just like that , the one real conversation that my stepbrother and i have ever had is over .

i could practically feel him closing back up at the end there .