MichaelOrme/Profane · Datasets at Hugging Face

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You're all part of Satan's army now!	What the hell is going on?!
What?! Why would you call me a pigfucker?!	Well, let's see... First of all, you fuck pigs.
Well, let's see... First of all, you fuck pigs.	Oh yeah!
It's from your mother.	My mother sent YOU a letter? What's it say?
My mother sent YOU a letter? What's it say?	It says 'Dear Terrance, please don't ever tell my son that I licked your hairy balls.'
Well, Terrance I hope you learned something from this whole experience.	I did, Terrance, I learned that you are a boner biting dick fart fuck face!
Phillip, we've been tricked and ambushed by The Conan O'Brian Show!!	This little scrotum sucker willfully deceived us! You are a bad man!
This little scrotum sucker willfully deceived us! You are a bad man!	And you call yourself a Canadian! I told you we should of done Leno!
Well of COURSE he wants out of hell! The whole POINT of hell is that you don't WANT to be here!	Okay, kid, I have a deal for you! If you want out of hell, all you have to do is collect 10 proofs of purchases from 'Snacky Smores.' They're rich, chocolatey and really hit the spot. Bring me ten proofs of purchases and we'll grant you ANY WISH YOU WANT.
Yeah! YEAH!!! Man I'm getting so HOT!!!	Do you always think about sex? I'm talking about some very important stuff here!
Do you always think about sex? I'm talking about some very important stuff here!	Listen buttercup, let's make love and forget about the whole thing.
Listen buttercup, let's make love and forget about the whole thing.	Is sex the only thing that matters to you?
What did you do today Satan?	You don't care.
You don't care.	Hey fella! Relax! This whole armageddon thing has got you all stressed out. Let's make love.
Hey fella! Relax! This whole armageddon thing has got you all stressed out. Let's make love.	Do you remember when you first got here? We used to talk all night long. Until the sun came up... We would just lie in bed and TALK.
Do you remember when you first got here? We used to talk all night long. Until the sun came up... We would just lie in bed and TALK.	That's because I wanted to fuck you, dumbass! Now hows aboot you get those pants down!
That's because I wanted to fuck you, dumbass! Now hows aboot you get those pants down!	Don't call me dumb!
Don't call me dumb!	I mean cute dumb. Now bend over!
This is the millennium, Saddam! This is Armageddon! There's more to life than sex!	Hey, relax guy!
Hey, relax guy!	Well I just want you to be impressed with what I <u>do</u>. I want you to respect my MIND.
Well I just want you to be impressed with what I <u>do</u>. I want you to respect my MIND.	I DO respect your mind! It turns me on! It makes me wanna fuck the shit out of you! Don't you see?
What if I just left?	Where're you gonna go, bitch? Besides, you know that if you left me, I'd hunt you down and kill you, right? I'm gonna go grab a drink.
I TOLD you not to make that deal, Saddam!	Who gives a fuck?! I was just fucking with him!
No, Saddam. You made a deal. You can't just renege on a deal. That's lying.	Relax bitch! You're better seen, not hear okay?
Help you? You've destroyed my life and now you want me to help you?! You're always making me feel like a piece of shit.	Come on guy, you know I only rib you because I love you so much!
Come on guy, you know I only rib you because I love you so much!	If you love somebody then you treat them with respect! You've never respected me!
If you love somebody then you treat them with respect! You've never respected me!	Can we talk about this later? Everyone is watching!
Can we talk about this later? Everyone is watching!	I don't care! I want to talk about it now!
Now do what I say and keep your fucking mouth shut!	THAT'S IT! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!!!
What the hell are you talking about, kid?	You don't get it Stan... You just don't get it.
NAZIS!!	What's the matter, Wendy?
What's the matter, Wendy?	Nothing, Stan. You wouldn't understand.
Nothing, Stan. You wouldn't understand.	God damn it, why does she keep saying that?
Wendy... How would you like to go get some ice cream?	Sure, Stan! How did you know I loved ice cream?
Sure, Stan! How did you know I loved ice cream?	My friend the clitoris told me.
My friend the clitoris told me.	Wow, I have a clitoris too.
Wow, I have a clitoris too.	Really? Where the hell do you keep it? It's huge.
You don't have watches?	Dude, you didn't say anything about watches.
Dude, you didn't say anything about watches.	What do you think this is kid? Lick Barney the Dinosaur's pussy fucking kiddie hour? Huh? This is real life with consequences you take to the grave!
Where the hell did you come from?	Hello second mate Barnes. I was instructed to come to the bridge.
Well that's your call. Doesn't make a damn bit of difference to me. Just as long as I get my cut.	Oh you'll get it, believe me. So I'll see you in a few.
Oh you'll get it, believe me. So I'll see you in a few.	10-4 good buddy.
You're not helping my heart condition any, Barnes! Now just what the hell are you dragging your ass for?	The others decided to get cute with me, so I'm teaching them a lesson!
This ship is going down in a blaze of glory!	Well blaze your ass out of there! You've completely altered your trajectory, are we linking up or not?!
Well blaze your ass out of there! You've completely altered your trajectory, are we linking up or not?!	Don't worry about me, I'm changing coordinates now. I've come to far to be tripped up by some Dudley do-right... motherfuckers!
Well if you knew it then why did set your thrusters on before making the calculation?	I told you, I had to teach a few people a lesson!
I told you, I had to teach a few people a lesson!	Goddamn it Barnes this really steams my onions!
Goddamn it Barnes this really steams my onions!	Let's get something straight, Chappy!
We don't.	Well maybe there's a way out of here.
Well maybe there's a way out of here.	Fat chance of that. Even if we had C4 and a laser torch these doors wouldn't budge. That son of a bitch...that stupid son of a bitch.
It's getting too cold in here. I can't stand this anymore!	Baby, take it easy.
Baby, take it easy.	How can you sit there with your fat stomach and tell me to take it easy! I want to go home! I want to be warm! I want to get out of here!
What the hell is that?	The engines!
I got suspended when I was young, too. I was pretty cocky in my day.	They suspended me for 100 years.
They suspended me for 100 years.	100 years!
100 years!	I can appeal in five. I was hoping you could help me Mr. Fazeli.
I can appeal in five. I was hoping you could help me Mr. Fazeli.	What do you think I can do?
What do you think I can do?	I need a sponsor to get my sanction card back. Where I come from, you're the king.
I need a sponsor to get my sanction card back. Where I come from, you're the king.	Sure, around here, any fat old bald guy could be king. I'm nothing. It wouldn't do any good for me to talk to the Congress. Hey, you thirsty? You like orange whips?
Sure, around here, any fat old bald guy could be king. I'm nothing. It wouldn't do any good for me to talk to the Congress. Hey, you thirsty? You like orange whips?	I've never had orange whips, I'm from Akron.
Remember the finals in Akron in '59? You had a seven-ten split in the final frame.	Yeah, against that prick VanDeMark.
Yeah, against that prick VanDeMark.	Ten thousand to one, but you pegged it. The toughest shot on the last frame.
Ten thousand to one, but you pegged it. The toughest shot on the last frame.	That game was before you was born.
That game was before you was born.	My mom was there. She told me about it. The 'Fazeli Split.'
What the fuck is this?	What's it look like to you?
What's it look like to you?	It looks like dwarf bowling.
I do what I gotta do to survive.	You have no right to call yourself a bowler. Buzz slaps Theo in the face.
You have no right to call yourself a bowler. Buzz slaps Theo in the face.	I'm more of a bowler than you'll ever be. I deal with my own shit. I ain't asking anyone to bail me out.
I'm more of a bowler than you'll ever be. I deal with my own shit. I ain't asking anyone to bail me out.	I'm your blood.
I'm your blood.	You wish!
What makes you so sure it was me? She coulda had lotsa bowlers! Theo rushes Buzz and grabs his arm. The two men struggle for the pin.	Don't say that about my mom!
Don't say that about my mom!	I had a career. She wanted a little bowler of her own. Sid and Breeze leap into the fray, prying the two men apart. They wrestle Theo against a wall, pressing his face into the tiles.
I had a career. She wanted a little bowler of her own. Sid and Breeze leap into the fray, prying the two men apart. They wrestle Theo against a wall, pressing his face into the tiles.	Fuck you and fuck bowling.
Fuck you and fuck bowling.	That's a laugh. You're all strung out. You're a bowling junkie.
That's a laugh. You're all strung out. You're a bowling junkie.	I don't need the stinking pro-tour.
I don't need the stinking pro-tour.	You're dead without the pro-tour, and you know it. Get him away from me. Sid and Breeze punch Theo in the face.
Theo, I want you to get out of this town.	I'm getting to like it here.
I'm getting to like it here.	Did that porcupine say he'd get you back on the tour?
Did that porcupine say he'd get you back on the tour?	I gotta survive.
I gotta survive.	He'll be a barnacle on your ass the rest of your life.
He'll be a barnacle on your ass the rest of your life.	You got a better offer?
You got a better offer?	No...
No...	I didn't think so.
Don't tell me, John.	Cool!
Cool!	Theo. Howzitgoin.
Theo. Howzitgoin.	Hey man, welcome to our parking lot. Lemme give you some advice, if she asks you to dance, make sure her brother's not around. Somebody blew out Junior's pilot light, if you get my meaning.
Hey man, welcome to our parking lot. Lemme give you some advice, if she asks you to dance, make sure her brother's not around. Somebody blew out Junior's pilot light, if you get my meaning.	How's that?
How's that?	I was doing the lambada with her and the guy freaks, he breaks my arm, tries to kill me. I swear man, the guy thought I was a piata. If nobody else hadn't a been there, he wouldn't have stopped. He woulda killed me. Fuckin' guy man, just snapped. How do you like your burger?
I was doing the lambada with her and the guy freaks, he breaks my arm, tries to kill me. I swear man, the guy thought I was a piata. If nobody else hadn't a been there, he wouldn't have stopped. He woulda killed me. Fuckin' guy man, just snapped. How do you like your burger?	Uh...over easy.
Uh...over easy.	I'll tell you one thing, you won't see me around that alley with that freak on the loose. Stay away from his ass - and don't play any of his fuckin' knock-knock jokes.
So you're Buzz's boy. I've been expecting you. You hurt my feelings when you didn't come and see me sooner.	You know who I am?
You know who I am?	Nobody sticks a finger into a bowling ball in this town without Miles Kastle knowing about it. You don't mind if I have a word with Theo, do you bunny? Kastle takes Theo by the elbow and pulls him away.
Nobody sticks a finger into a bowling ball in this town without Miles Kastle knowing about it. You don't mind if I have a word with Theo, do you bunny? Kastle takes Theo by the elbow and pulls him away.	I heard you've been having a little trouble with the Congress. Theo pulls his eyes off Sheila. Kastle walks Theo past pairs of bowlers.
I heard you've been having a little trouble with the Congress. Theo pulls his eyes off Sheila. Kastle walks Theo past pairs of bowlers.	You might say I'm at the top of their shit list.
You might say I'm at the top of their shit list.	Maybe I can help you. Try a lighter ball, Penelope - you'll get hurt with that big ball, honey. I've seen tapes of you bowling on the circuit. You got Fazeli blood running through you. Your pop was a genuine talent in his day.
Maybe I can help you. Try a lighter ball, Penelope - you'll get hurt with that big ball, honey. I've seen tapes of you bowling on the circuit. You got Fazeli blood running through you. Your pop was a genuine talent in his day.	What's with the bad air between you two, Mr. Kastle?
What's with the bad air between you two, Mr. Kastle?	It's nothing, just a slight business imbalance. How's Gloria's thumb?
This is a vicious cycle.	I think that a motorbike is one of the last really free things that people can do.
I think that a motorbike is one of the last really free things that people can do.	Isn't this technically a scooter?
Isn't this technically a scooter?	When I'm on my bike I feel like a wild person. Better than any sex I've ever had.

You're all part of Satan's army now!

What the hell is going on?!

What?! Why would you call me a pigfucker?!

Well, let's see... First of all, you fuck pigs.

Oh yeah!

It's from your mother.

My mother sent YOU a letter? What's it say?

It says 'Dear Terrance, please don't ever tell my son that I licked your hairy balls.'

Well, Terrance I hope you learned something from this whole experience.

I did, Terrance, I learned that you are a boner biting dick fart fuck face!

Phillip, we've been tricked and ambushed by The Conan O'Brian Show!!

This little scrotum sucker willfully deceived us! You are a bad man!

And you call yourself a Canadian! I told you we should of done Leno!

Well of COURSE he wants out of hell! The whole POINT of hell is that you don't WANT to be here!

Okay, kid, I have a deal for you! If you want out of hell, all you have to do is collect 10 proofs of purchases from 'Snacky Smores.' They're rich, chocolatey and really hit the spot. Bring me ten proofs of purchases and we'll grant you ANY WISH YOU WANT.

Yeah! YEAH!!! Man I'm getting so HOT!!!

Do you always think about sex? I'm talking about some very important stuff here!

Listen buttercup, let's make love and forget about the whole thing.

Is sex the only thing that matters to you?

What did you do today Satan?

You don't care.

Hey fella! Relax! This whole armageddon thing has got you all stressed out. Let's make love.

Do you remember when you first got here? We used to talk all night long. Until the sun came up... We would just lie in bed and TALK.

That's because I wanted to fuck you, dumbass! Now hows aboot you get those pants down!

Don't call me dumb!

I mean cute dumb. Now bend over!

This is the millennium, Saddam! This is Armageddon! There's more to life than sex!

Hey, relax guy!

Well I just want you to be impressed with what I <u>do</u>. I want you to respect my MIND.

I DO respect your mind! It turns me on! It makes me wanna fuck the shit out of you! Don't you see?

What if I just left?

Where're you gonna go, bitch? Besides, you know that if you left me, I'd hunt you down and kill you, right? I'm gonna go grab a drink.

I TOLD you not to make that deal, Saddam!

Who gives a fuck?! I was just fucking with him!

No, Saddam. You made a deal. You can't just renege on a deal. That's lying.

Relax bitch! You're better seen, not hear okay?

Help you? You've destroyed my life and now you want me to help you?! You're always making me feel like a piece of shit.

Come on guy, you know I only rib you because I love you so much!

If you love somebody then you treat them with respect! You've never respected me!

Can we talk about this later? Everyone is watching!

I don't care! I want to talk about it now!

Now do what I say and keep your fucking mouth shut!

THAT'S IT! I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!!!

What the hell are you talking about, kid?

You don't get it Stan... You just don't get it.

NAZIS!!

What's the matter, Wendy?

Nothing, Stan. You wouldn't understand.

God damn it, why does she keep saying that?

Wendy... How would you like to go get some ice cream?

Sure, Stan! How did you know I loved ice cream?

My friend the clitoris told me.

Wow, I have a clitoris too.

Really? Where the hell do you keep it? It's huge.

You don't have watches?

Dude, you didn't say anything about watches.

What do you think this is kid? Lick Barney the Dinosaur's pussy fucking kiddie hour? Huh? This is real life with consequences you take to the grave!

Where the hell did you come from?

Hello second mate Barnes. I was instructed to come to the bridge.

Well that's your call. Doesn't make a damn bit of difference to me. Just as long as I get my cut.

Oh you'll get it, believe me. So I'll see you in a few.

10-4 good buddy.

You're not helping my heart condition any, Barnes! Now just what the hell are you dragging your ass for?

The others decided to get cute with me, so I'm teaching them a lesson!

This ship is going down in a blaze of glory!

Well blaze your ass out of there! You've completely altered your trajectory, are we linking up or not?!

Don't worry about me, I'm changing coordinates now. I've come to far to be tripped up by some Dudley do-right... motherfuckers!

Well if you knew it then why did set your thrusters on before making the calculation?

I told you, I had to teach a few people a lesson!

Goddamn it Barnes this really steams my onions!

Let's get something straight, Chappy!

We don't.

Well maybe there's a way out of here.

Fat chance of that. Even if we had C4 and a laser torch these doors wouldn't budge. That son of a bitch...that stupid son of a bitch.

It's getting too cold in here. I can't stand this anymore!

Baby, take it easy.

How can you sit there with your fat stomach and tell me to take it easy! I want to go home! I want to be warm! I want to get out of here!

What the hell is that?

The engines!

I got suspended when I was young, too. I was pretty cocky in my day.

They suspended me for 100 years.

100 years!

I can appeal in five. I was hoping you could help me Mr. Fazeli.

What do you think I can do?

I need a sponsor to get my sanction card back. Where I come from, you're the king.

Sure, around here, any fat old bald guy could be king. I'm nothing. It wouldn't do any good for me to talk to the Congress. Hey, you thirsty? You like orange whips?

I've never had orange whips, I'm from Akron.

Remember the finals in Akron in '59? You had a seven-ten split in the final frame.

Yeah, against that prick VanDeMark.

Ten thousand to one, but you pegged it. The toughest shot on the last frame.

That game was before you was born.

My mom was there. She told me about it. The 'Fazeli Split.'

What the fuck is this?

What's it look like to you?

It looks like dwarf bowling.

I do what I gotta do to survive.

You have no right to call yourself a bowler. Buzz slaps Theo in the face.

I'm more of a bowler than you'll ever be. I deal with my own shit. I ain't asking anyone to bail me out.

I'm your blood.

You wish!

What makes you so sure it was me? She coulda had lotsa bowlers! Theo rushes Buzz and grabs his arm. The two men struggle for the pin.

Don't say that about my mom!

I had a career. She wanted a little bowler of her own. Sid and Breeze leap into the fray, prying the two men apart. They wrestle Theo against a wall, pressing his face into the tiles.

Fuck you and fuck bowling.

That's a laugh. You're all strung out. You're a bowling junkie.

I don't need the stinking pro-tour.

You're dead without the pro-tour, and you know it. Get him away from me. Sid and Breeze punch Theo in the face.

Theo, I want you to get out of this town.

I'm getting to like it here.

Did that porcupine say he'd get you back on the tour?

I gotta survive.

He'll be a barnacle on your ass the rest of your life.

You got a better offer?

No...

I didn't think so.

Don't tell me, John.

Cool!

Theo. Howzitgoin.

Hey man, welcome to our parking lot. Lemme give you some advice, if she asks you to dance, make sure her brother's not around. Somebody blew out Junior's pilot light, if you get my meaning.

How's that?

I was doing the lambada with her and the guy freaks, he breaks my arm, tries to kill me. I swear man, the guy thought I was a piata. If nobody else hadn't a been there, he wouldn't have stopped. He woulda killed me. Fuckin' guy man, just snapped. How do you like your burger?

Uh...over easy.

I'll tell you one thing, you won't see me around that alley with that freak on the loose. Stay away from his ass - and don't play any of his fuckin' knock-knock jokes.

So you're Buzz's boy. I've been expecting you. You hurt my feelings when you didn't come and see me sooner.

You know who I am?

Nobody sticks a finger into a bowling ball in this town without Miles Kastle knowing about it. You don't mind if I have a word with Theo, do you bunny? Kastle takes Theo by the elbow and pulls him away.

I heard you've been having a little trouble with the Congress. Theo pulls his eyes off Sheila. Kastle walks Theo past pairs of bowlers.

You might say I'm at the top of their shit list.

Maybe I can help you. Try a lighter ball, Penelope - you'll get hurt with that big ball, honey. I've seen tapes of you bowling on the circuit. You got Fazeli blood running through you. Your pop was a genuine talent in his day.

What's with the bad air between you two, Mr. Kastle?

It's nothing, just a slight business imbalance. How's Gloria's thumb?

This is a vicious cycle.

I think that a motorbike is one of the last really free things that people can do.

Isn't this technically a scooter?

When I'm on my bike I feel like a wild person. Better than any sex I've ever had.