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have been converted to s satisfaction in and mc the floor cared drove through an astonishing number of books from the public library and from city shops was at first uncomfortable over her habit of buying a book was a book and if you had several thousand of them right here in the library free the should you spend your good money after worrying about it for two or three years he decided that this was one of the funny ideas which she had caught as a and from she would never entirely recover the authors whom she read were most of them annoyed by the they were young american young english russian france wells key lee masters henry and all the other philosophers and artists whom women were consulting everywhere in in new york in san drawing rooms schools for from them she got the same confused desire which the million other women felt the same determination to be class conscious without discovering the class of which she was to be conscious certainly her reading her observations of main street of and of the several adjacent which she had seen on drives with in her thought certain convictions appeared a fragment of an impression at a time while she was going to sleep or her nails or waiting for these convictions she presented to beside a over a bo of not very good and from uncle s on an evening when both and had gone out of town with the other officers of the ancient and order of l to a new chapter at had come to the house for the night she helped in putting to bed the while about his soft skin then they talked midnight what said that evening what she was passionately thinking was also emerging in the minds of women in ten thousand g her her were not pat but visions of a tragic she did not utter them so that they can be given in her words they were with well you see and if you get what i mean and i don t know that i m making myself clear but they were definite enough and indignant main street m in reading popular stories and seeing plays asserted she had found only two traditions of the american small town the first tradition repeated in scores of magazines every month is that the american village remains the one sure abode of friendship honesty and clean sweet girls therefore all men who succeed in painting in paris or in in new york at last become weary of smart women return to their native towns assert that cities are vicious marry their childhood and abide in those towns until death the other tradition is that the significant features of all villages are whiskers iron dogs upon gold bricks of gilded cat tails and shrewd comic old men who are known as and who i swan this altogether admirable tradition rules the stage and newspaper humor but out of actual life it passed forty years ago s small town thinks not in but in cheap cars ready made clothes leather chairs bridge motion pictures land sets of mark twain and a version of national politics with such a small town life a or a is content but there are also hundreds of thousands particularly women and young men who are not at all content the more intelligent young people and the fortunate flee to the cities with and despite the tradition resolutely stay there seldom returning even for the most protesting of the towns leave them in old age if they can afford it and go to live in or in the cities the reason insisted is not a it is nothing so amusing it is an background a of speech and manners a rigid ruling of the spirit by the desire to appear respectable it is contentment the contentment of the quiet dead who are scornful of the living for their restless walking it is as the one positive virtue it is the of happiness it is slavery self sought and self defended it is made god a people food and sitting afterward and in rocking chairs with listening to mechanical music saying mechanical things about the excellence of ford and themselves as the greatest race in the world iv she had inquired as to the effect of this upon foreigners she remembered the feeble quality to be found in the first generation she recalled the fair at the to which had taken her there in the the of a farm kitchen pale women in scarlet embroidered with gold thread and colored beads in black skirts with a line of blue green striped and caps very pretty to set off a fresh face had served sweet cakes and sour milk with for the first time in had found novelty she in the mild of it but she saw these women exchanging their and red for pork and white trading the ancient christmas hymns of the for she s my being into and in less than a generation losing in the whatever pleasant new customs they might have added to the life of the town their sons finished the process in ready made clothes and ready made hi school phrases they sank into propriety and the sound american customs had absorbed without one trace of an other alien invasion and along with these foreigners she felt herself being into glossy and she in fear the respectability of the said card is by vows of poverty and in the matter of knowledge except for half a dozen in each town the citizens are proud of that achievement of ignorance which it is so easy to come by to be intellectual or artistic or in their own word to be is to be and of virtue large experiments in politics and in co tion requiring knowledge courage and tion do in the west and but	42
they are not of the towns they are of the farmers if these main street are by the it is only by occasional teachers doctors lawyers the labor and workmen like miles who are by being as as baked the editor and the preach at them the cloud of serene ignorance them in and here observed yes well do you know always thought that ray would have made a wonderful he has what i call an essentially religious soul my he d have read the service beautifully i suppose it s too late now but as i tell him he can also serve the world by selling shoes and i wonder if we t to have vi doubtless all small towns in all countries in all ages admitted have a tendency to be not only dull but mean bitter with curiosity in france or quite as much as in or these are inherent in but a village in a country which is taking pains to become and pure which to succeed england as the chief of the world is no longer merely provincial no longer and in its leaf ignorance it is a force seeking to the earth to drain the hills and sea of color to set at and to dress the high gods in sure of itself it o er as a in a brown the wisdom of china and of over arches for centuries to the sayings of such a society functions admirably in the large production of cheap dollar watches and safety but it is not satisfied until the entire world also admits that the end and joyous purpose of living is to ride in to make pictures of dollar watches and in the twilight to sit talking not of love and courage but of the convenience of safety and such a society such a nation is determined by the the greatest is but a sam and all the and are village lawyers and grown nine feet tall though a regards itself as a part of the great world itself to rome and it will not the scientific spirit the mind which make it great it at information which will visibly procure money or social its conception of a ideal is not the grand manner the noble the fine aristocratic pride but cheap labor for the kitchen and rapid increase in the price of land it plays at cards on greasy oil cloth in a and does not know that are walking and talking on the terrace if all the were as kindly as and sam there would be no reason for desiring the town to seek great traditions it is the harry the the elders small busy men powerful in their common purpose themselves as men of the world but keeping themselves men of the cash register and the comic who make the town a vn she had sought to be definite in the surface of the she asserted that it is a matter of universal of of construction so that the towns resemble frontier of neglect of natural advantages so that the hills are covered with brush the lakes shut df by and the lined with of of of buildings and excessive breadth and of the streets so there is no escape from and from sight of the grim sweep of land nor any to the along while the breadth which would be majestic in an avenue of palaces makes the low shabby shops creeping down the typical main street the more mean by comparison the universal that is the physical expression the of dull safety nine of the american towns are so alike that it is the to wander from one to another always west of and often east of it there is the same lumber yard the same railroad station the same ford the same the same box like houses and two story the new more conscious houses are alike in their very attempts at the same main street the same square houses of or brick the shops show the same advertised wares the newspapers of sections three thousand miles apart have the same features the boy in just such a ready made suit as is found on just such a boy in both of the same phrases from the same sporting pages and if one of them is in college and the other is a no one may which is which if were snatched from and instantly conveyed to a town away he would not realize it he would go down apparently the same street almost certainly it would be called main street in the same store he would see the same young man serving the same ice cream to the same young woman with the same magazines and records under her arm not till he had climbed to his office and found another sign on the door another dr inside would he understand that something curious had happened finally behind all her comments saw the fact that die towns no more exist to serve the farmers who are their reason of existence than do the great they exist to on the farmers to provide for the large and social and unlike the they do not give to the district in return for a stately and permanent but only this ragged camp it is a greek civilization the civilization there we are then said the remedy is there criticism perhaps for the beginning of the beginning oh there s nothing that attacks the god that doesn t help a and probably there s nothing that helps very much perhaps some day the farmers will build and own their market towns think of the club they could have but i m afraid i haven t any reform not any the trouble is spiritual and no league or party can a preference for gardens rather than there s my confession well in other words all you want is perfection	42
why not how you hate this place how can you expect to do anything with it if you haven t any sympathy but i have and affection or else i wouldn t so learned that isn t just an on the as i thought first but as large as new york in new york i wouldn t know more than forty or fifty people and i know that many here go say what you re thinking well my dear if i did take all your notions seriously it would be pretty imagine how a person would feel after working hard for years and helping to build up a nice town to have you in and simply say think that s fair why not it must be just as for the her to see and make it would i imagine are kind of nice to ride in but we ve got better bath rooms but my dear you re not the only person in this town who has done some thinking for herself although pardon my i m afraid you think so i ll admit we lack some things maybe our isn t as good as shows in paris all i want to see any foreign culture suddenly forced on us whether it s street planning or table manners or crazy ideas what she termed practical things that will make a happier and prettier town but that do belong to our life that actually are being done of the she spoke of the rest room the fight against the campaign for more gardens and shade trees and not fantastic and and distant but immediate and sure s answer was fantastic and enough yes yes i know they re good but if i could put through all those at once still want startling things life is comfortable and clean enough here already and so secure what it needs is to be less secure more eager the improvements which i d like the to advocate are plays and classic dancers exquisite legs beneath and i can see him so a thick black bearded cynical frenchman who would sit about and drink and sing opera and tell stories and laugh at our and quote and not be ashamed to kiss my hand i not about the rest of it but i guess that s what you and all the other discontented young women really want some stranger kissing your at s gasp the old like darted out and cried oh my dear don t take that too seriously i just meant i know you just meant it go on be good for my soul main street isn t it funny here we all are me trying to be good for s soul and trying to be good for my soul what are my other sins h there s plenty of them possibly some day we shall have your fat cynical frenchman horrible object his brains and his with vile liquor but thank heaven for a while we ll manage to keep busy with our and you see these things really are coming the is getting somewhere and you her tone the words to my great disappointment are doing less not more than the people you laugh at sam on the school board is working for better school whose you always think is so absurd has persuaded the railroad to share the expense of a space at the station to do away with that vacant lot you sneer so easily i m sorry but i do think there s something essentially cheap in your attitude especially about religion if you must know you re not a sound at ao you re an and you give up too easily you gave up on the new city hall the anti fly campaign club papers the library board the dramatic association just because we didn t into the very first thing you want perfection all at once do you know what the finest thing you ve done is aside from bringing into the world it was the you gave dr will during baby welfare week you didn t demand that each baby be a philosopher and artist before you weighed him as you do with the rest of us and now i m afraid perhaps hurt you we re going to have a new in this town in just a few years and we ll have it without one bit of help or interest professor and i and some others have been away at the men for years we didn t call on you because you would never stand the pound pound year after year without one bit of encouragement and we ve won i ve got the promise of everybody who counts that just as soon as war conditions permit they ll vote the bonds tor the and we ll have a wonderful building lovely brown brick with big windows and agricultural and manual training when we get it be my answer to all your theories i m glad and i m ashamed i haven t had any part in getting it but please t think fm if i ask one question will the teachers in the new building go on informing the children that is a yellow spot on the map and caesar the title of a book of vm s da was indignant was they talked for another hour the eternal mary and an mary and a it was who conquered the fact that she had been left out of the campaign for the new disconcerted she laid her dreams of perfection aside when asked her to take charge of a group of camp fire girls she obeyed and had definite pleasure out of the indian dances and and she went more regularly to the with as lieutenant and commander she for a village nurse to attend poor families	42
raised the fund herself saw to it that the nurse was young and strong and amiable and intelligent yet all the while she beheld the cynical frenchman and the dancers as clearly as the child sees its air bom she the camp fire girls not because in s words this training will help so much to make them good wives but because she hoped that the dances would bring color into their she helped to set out plants in the tiny park at the railroad station she in the dirt with a small curved and the most of she talked to about the of and and she felt that she was a temple deserted by the gods and empty even of incense and the sound of passengers looking from trains saw her as a village woman of fading virtue and no the heard her say oh yes i do think it will be a good example for the children and all the while she saw herself running through the streets of planting led her to she never got much farther than the lily and the wild rose but she what does the say he cried his hand full of his gilded main street with she to embrace him she that he made life more than full she was altogether reconciled for an hour but she at night to hovering death she crept away from the of that was into the and by the mirror in the door of the examined her pallid face she growing visibly older in as s da grew er and younger wasn t her nose wasn t her neck she stared and choked she was only thirty but the five years since her had they not gone by as hastily and as though she had been under would time not past till death she her fist on the cool rim of the and raged against the indifferent gods don t i won t endure iti they lie and will and aunt they tell me i ought to be satisfied with and a good home and planting seven in a station garden i am ii when i die the world will be as far as fm concerned i am ii i m not content to leave the sea and the ivory towers to others i want them for me damn damn all of do they think they can make me believe that a display of potatoes at s is enough beauty and strangeness chapter w hen america entered the great european war sent off to an c training can less than a year after her wedding was and rather strong he came out a first lieutenant of and was one of the earliest sent abroad grew definitely afraid of as transferred the passion which had been released in marriage to the cause of the war as she lost all when was touched by the desire for heroism in and tried to express it made her feel like an impertinent child by and the sons of sam joined the army but most of the soldiers were the sons of german and farmers unknown to dr and dr became in the medical corps and were stationed at in and they were the only officers besides horn the her district wanted to go with them but the several doctors of the town forgot medical and meeting in council decided that he would do better to wait and keep the town well till he should be needed was forty two now the only doctor left in a of eighteen miles old dr who loved comfort like a cat out at night for country calls and hunted through his collar box for his g a r button did not quite know at she thou t about s going certainly she was no l wife she knew that he wanted to go she knew that this longing was always in him behind his unchanged and the weather she felt tor him an admiring affection and she was sorry that she had nothing than affection was the warrior of the town was no longer the boy who had sat in the about s and the mysteries of he was nineteen now tall broad busy the town sport famous for his ability to drink beer to shake to tell stories and from his post in front of s store to the girls by them as they passed his face was at once and pin ly was to be heard it abroad that if he get the widow s permission to he d run away and without it he shouted that he hated every dirty hun by if he could just a into one big fat and learn him some decency and he d die happy got much reputation by a named for being a damn german this was the younger who was killed in the while he was trying to bring the body of his yankee captain back to the lines at this time was still dwelling in and planning to go to war everywhere heard that the war was going to bring a change in to and everything main street from to national politics and she tried to in it only she did not find it she saw the women o made for the red cross giving up bridge and laughing at having to do without sugar but over uie they did not speak of god and the souls of men but of miles s impudence of s scandalous on with a farmer s daughter four ago of cooking and of their to the war touched only she was punctual and efficient at making but she could not like mrs and mrs fill the with hate for enemies when she protested to the young do the work while these old ones sit around and interrupt us and with hate they re too feeble to do anything but hate th i	42
turned on her li you can t be at least don t be so and now when men and are dying some of us we have given up so much and we re glad to at least we expect that you others sha n t try to be witty at our expense there was weeping did desire to see the defeated she did persuade herself that there were no save that of she did thrill to motion pictures of troops in new york and she was when she met miles cm the street and he how s tricks things fine with me got two new cows well have you become a eh sure they ll bring the of death yes sure in every war since the garden of the workmen have gone out to fight each other for perfectly good reasons handed to them by their now me i m wise i m so wise that i know i know anything about the war it was not a of the war that remained with her after s but a perception that she and and all of the good lo wanted to do something for the common people were insignificant because the common people were able to do things for themselves and highly likely to as soon as they learned the fact the tion of millions of workmen like miles taking control frightened her and she n idly away from the thought of a time when she might no longer retain the tion of lady to the b and and om she loved and m it was in june two months after america s entrance into the war that the mom event happened the visit of the great the president of the velvet car company of boston the one native son who was always to be mentioned to strangers for two weeks there were sam cried to say i hear is coming by y be to see the d eh finally the printed on the front page with a no head a letter from to elder dear jack jack i find i can make it fm to go to washington as a dollar a year man for the government in the section and tell them how much i don t know about but before i start in being a hero i want to shoot out and catch me a big black bass and out you and sam and harry and will and the rest of you tu land in o p on june on no from shake a day day tell to save me a of beer sincerely yours an members of the social financial scientific literary and sets were at no to meet mrs was beside the and almost cordial to miss the cared saw laughing down at them from the train with the eye of an in the voice of the good fellow he as she was introduced to him not he to her looked into her eyes and his hand shake was warm he declined the of he walked ofi his arm about the shoulder of the q with the elegant harry carrying of his enormous pale leather bags the other jack elder bearing an overcoat and the fishing tackle noted that though wore and a stick no small boy she decided i must have will get a double main street blue coat and a wing collar and a dotted bow tie like his that evening when was the grass along the walk with sheep rolled up alone he was now in trousers shirt open at the throat a white hat and canvas and leather shoes x n the job there old say my lord this is living to come back and get into a man sized pair of they can talk all they want to about the city but my idea of a good time is to loaf around and see you boys and catch a bass he up the walk and at where s that little fellow i hear you ve got one fine big he boy that you re holding out on he s gone to bed rather briefly i know and rules are rules these days get through the shop like a but look here sister fm one great hand at rules come on now let uncle have a look at him please now sister he put his arm about her waist it was a large strong arm and very agreeable he grinned at her with a while glowed she flushed she was alarmed by the ease with which the big city man invaded her guarded personality she was glad in retreat to ahead of the two men up stairs to the hall room in which slept all the way muttered well well say but it s good to have you back certainly is good to see you lay on his stomach making an earnest business of sleeping he his eyes in the dwarf blue pillow to escape the electric light then sat up abruptly small and frail in his his of brown hair wild the pillow clutched to his breast he he stared at the stranger in a manner of patient dismissal he explained to wouldn t let it be morning yet what does the pillow say dropped his arm on s shoulder he pronounced my lord you re a lucky girl to have a fine young like that i figure will knew what he was doing when he persuaded you to take a chance on an m bum like him they tell me you come from st paul we re going to get you to come to boston some day he leaned over the bed young man you re the sight seen this of boston with your permission may we present you with a slight token of our regard and appreciation of your long service he held out a red rubber remarked it hid it under	42
the and stared at as though he had never seen the man before for once permitted herself the spiritual luxury of not asking why dear what do you say when some one gives you a present the great man was apparently waiting they stood in suspense till led them out how about planning a fishing trip he remained for half an hour always he told what a charming person she was always he looked at her yes he probably would make a woman fall in love with him but it wouldn t last a week i d get tired of his confounded his he s a spiritual bully he makes me rude to him in self oh yes he is to be here he does like us he s so good an actor that he his own self ao him in boston he d have all the obvious big city things discreet order a clever dinner at a smart decorated by the best firm but the pictures giving him away i d rather talk to in dusty office how i lie his arm my shoulder and his eyes dared me not to admire him be afraid of him i hate oh the inconceivable imagination of all this of analysis about a man a good decent friendly efficient man because he was kind to me as will s iv the the elders the and went fishing at red lake they drove forty miles to the lake in elder s new there was much ter and bustle at the start much of lunch baskets and poles much inquiry as to whether it would bother cared to sit with her feet up on a roll of when they were ready to go mrs lamented h sam i forgot my magazine and come on now if you women think you re going to be literary you can t go with us tough every one laughed a great deal and as they drove on mrs explained that though main street she would not have read it still she might have wanted to the other girls had a nap in the afternoon and she was ri in the middle of a it was an awfully story it seems that this girl was a only she was really the daughter of an american lady and a russian prince and men kept running after her just but she remained pure and there was a n e while the men floated on the lake casting for black bass the w prepared lunch and yawned car was a little of the manner in which the men assumed that they did not care to fish i don t want to go with them but i would like the privilege of refusing the lunch was long and pleasant it was a background for the talk of the great man come home hints of cities and large imperative affairs and famous people modest that yes their friend was doing as well as most of these boston that think so much of themselves because they come from rich old families and went to college and everything believe me it s us new business men that are running today and not a lot of old in their clubs realized that he was not one of the sons of her who if they do not actually starve in the east are invariably spoken of as hi y successful and she found behind ms too incessant flattery a genuine affection for his mates it was in the matter of the war that he most favored and thrilled them dropping his voice they bent nearer there was no one within two miles to he disclosed the fact that in both boston and washington he d been getting a lot of inside stuff on the war aright straight from he was in touch with some men name them but they were dam high up in both the war and state and he would say only for s sake they mustn t breathe one word of this it was strictly on the q t and not generally known outside of washington but just between ourselves and they could take this for spain had finally decided to join the in the grand scrap yes sir there d be two million fully equipped l s fighting with us in france in one month now some for germany all right how about the prospects for revolution in germany reverently asked the authority nothing to it the one thing you can bet on is that no matter wh happens to the win or lose they ll stick by the till hell over i got that absolutely straight from a fellow who s on the inside of the inside in washington no i don t pretend to know much about affairs but one thing you can put down as settled b that germany will be a empire for the next forty years at that i don t know as it s so bad the and the ke a firm hand a lot of these red who d be worse than a king if they could get control i m terribly interested in this that the in russia suggested she had been conquered by the man s knowledge of affairs for her s nuts about this russian revolution is there much to it there is not said can speak by the book there honey i m surprised to find you talking like a new york russian jew or one of these long i can tell you only you don t need to let every one in on it this is confidential i got it from a man who s close to the state department but as a matter of fact the will be back in power before the end of the year you read a lot about his retiring and about his being killed but	42
i know he s got a big army back of him and hell show these lazy beggars hunting for a soft berth the poor that fall for em hell show em where they get was sorry to hear that the was coming back but she said nothing the others had looked vacant at the mention of a country so far away as russia now they edged in and asked what he thought about the car in oil wells the comparative merits of young men bom in and in the question of the future cost of and wasn t it true that american put it all over these french men they were glad to find that he agreed with them on every point as she heard announce we re perfectly willing to talk to any the men may choose but we re not going to stand for some outside in and telling us how we re going to run our remembered that elder now meekly receiving new ideas had said the same thing in the same words while sam was digging up from his memory a long and immensely detailed story of the crushing things he had main said to a porter named george his knees and rocked and watched she wondered if he did not understand the of the smile with she listened to s account of the good one he had on that improper ten times told tale of how she had forgotten to attend to because she was all up the box i ch may be translated as playing the piano she was certain that saw her when she pretended not to hear s invitation to join a game of she feared the comments he might make she was irritated by her fear she was equally irritated when the returned her to find that she was proud of sharing in s as people waved and leaned from a window s ie said to herself as though i cared whether i m seen with this fat and simultaneously everybody has noticed how will and i are playing with mr the town was full of his stories his friendliness his memory for names his clothes his flies his generosity he had given a hundred to father the priest and a hundred to the reverend mr the minister for work at the bon ton card heard the tailor old certainly pulled a good one on this fellow that always is shooting his mouth he s supposed to of settled down since he got married but lord those fellows that think they know it all they never change well the red got the grand handed to him all right he had the nerve to breeze up to at s and he said he said to always wanted to look at a man that was so useful that would pay him a million dollars for existing and gave him tt and come right back have eh he says well he says been looking for a man so useful sweeping floors that i could pay him four dollars a day want the my friend ha ha say you know how is well for once he didn t have a thing to say he tried to get fresh and tell what a rotten town this is and come right back at him if you don t like this country you better get out of it and go back to germany ere you say maybe us fellows didn t give the though oh is the white haired boy in this au had borrowed elder s he stopped at the he at rocking with on the porch better for a ride she wanted to thanks so much but i m being maternal bring him along bring him along was out of the seat up the and the rest of her and were feeble she did not bring along was silent for a mile in words but he looked at her as though he meant her to know that he understood everything she thought she observed how deep was his chest lovely fields over there he said you really like them there s no profit in them he chuckled sister you can t get away with it i m you you consider me a big bluff well maybe i am but so are you my dear and pretty so that try to make love to you if i weren t afraid you d slap me mr do you talk that way to your wife s friends and do you call them sister as a matter of fact i do and i make em like it score two but his chuckle was not so and he was very attentive to the in a moment he was cautiously attacking that s a wonderful boy will great work these country are doing the other day in washington i was talking to a big scientific a professor in medical and he was saying that no one has ever sufficiently appreciated the general and the sympathy and help he gives folks these crack the young scientific fellows they re so and so up in their that they miss the human element except in the case of a few diseases that no human being would waste his time having it s the that keeps a community well mind and body and strikes me that will is one of the and headed country i ve ever met eh i m sure he is he s a servant of reality come again yes all of that whatever that is main street say you don t care a whole lot for it fm not mistaken there s where you re missing a big chance there s nothing to these cities believe me i this is a good town as they go you re lucky to be here i wish i could stay onr very well why don t you can t	42
aunt the fact that s income was now more than five thousand a year her view of the reason why had married whidi included some thoroughly praise of s kind heart her opinion of the library board just what had said about mrs s and what though of the several in the cities she went home soothed by confession by find ing a new friend iv the of the domestic situation went back home to help on the farm and had a succession of maids with between the lack of servants was becoming one of the most problems of the town the daughters against village and against the unchanged attitude of the toward hired girls they went off to city or to city shops and that they might be free and even human after hours the seventeen were at s desertion by the loyal they reminded her that she had said i don t have any le with maids see how stays on main street between of maids from the north woods from the occasional and n i and did her own and endured aunt s in to tell her how to a for dust how to sugar how to stuff a goose was and won shy praise from but as her shoulder began to sting she wondered how many millions of women had lied to themselves during the death years through which they had to enjoy the methods in she doubted the convenience and as a natural the of the and home which she had regarded as the basis of all decent life she considered her doubts she refused to how many of the women of the y seventeen their husbands and were by them she did not to but her eyes ached she was not the girl in breeches and a flannel shirt who had cooked over a camp fire in the mountains five years ago her ambition was to get to bed at nine her strongest emotion was resentment over rising at half past six to care for hu the bade of her neck ached as she got out of bed she was cynical about the joys of a single laborious life she understood why workmen and workmen s wives are not grateful to their kind at mid morning i en she was free from the ache in neck and bade she was glad of the reality of the hours were living and but she had no desire to read the little er essays in praise of labor whidi are daily written by the white felt and though she hid it a bit in the house she pondered upon the maid s room it was a small hole above the kitchen oppressive in summer in winter she saw that while she had been considering an unusually good mistress she had been permitting her friends and to live in a she complained to what s the matter with it he as they stood on the perilous stairs up from the kitchen she commented upon tiie sloping roof of boards stained in brown rings by the rain the floor the cot and its tumbled the broken the mirror maybe it ain t any but still it s much better than anything these hired girls are accustomed to at home that they think it s fine seems f oc to spend money i en they appreciate it but that t he with the of a man i o wishes to be surprising and delightful don t know but we might begin to think about building a new house one of these days how d you like that w why i m getting to the point now i fed we can afford one and a ill show this something like a real house well put one over on sam and harry make folks sit up an take notice es she said he did not go on daily he returned to the subject of the new house but as to time and mode he was indefinite at first she believed she of a low stone house with windows and beds of brick of a white frame cottage with green shutters and windows to her he answered well ye es might be worth thinking about remember where i put my pipe when she him he don t know seems to me those kind of houses you speak of have been it proved that what he wanted was a house exactly like sam s which was exactly like every third new house in every town in the country a square with a broad porch tidy and walks a house resembling the mind of a i o the party ticket and goes to church once a month and owns a good car he admitted well yes maybe it isn t so dam artistic but matter of fact though i don t want a place just like sam s maybe i would cut off that fool tower he s and i think probably it would lock better painted a nice cream color that yellow on sam s house is too kind of then there s another kind of house that s mighty nice and substantial looking with in a nice brown stain instead of seen some in you re way off your base when you say i only like one kind of house md aunt came in one evening when cared was fly a rose garden cottage youve had a lot of e q with housekeeping and don t you think i that it would be to have a nice square house and pay more main street tion to getting a furnace than to all this and aunt worked her lips as though they were an elastic band why of course i know how it is with young folks like you you want towers and bay windows and and heaven knows what au but the thing to get is and a good	42
furnace and a handy place to hang out the washing and the rest don t matter uncle a little put his face near to s and it don t i what d you care what folks think about the outside of your house it s the inside you re living in none of my business but i must say you young folks that d rather have cakes than potatoes get me she reached her room before she became savage dreadfully near she could hear the of aunt s voice and the of uncle s she had a dread that they would intrude on her then a fear that she would yield to s conception of duty toward an aunt and go down stairs to be nice felt the demand for behavior coming in waves from all the citizens who sat in their sitting rooms watching her with respectable eyes waiting demanding she oh all ri t ni go she powdered her nose straightened her collar and coldly marched down stairs the three elders ignored her they had advanced from the new house to agreeable general aunt was saying in a tone like the of dry toast i do think mr ought to have had the fixed at our store right away i went to see him on tuesday morning before ten no it was couple minutes after ten but anyway it was long before noon i know because i went right from the bank to the meat market to get some i think it s outrageous the prices charge for their meat and it isn t as if they gave you a good cut either but just any ad thing and i had time to get it and i stopped in at mrs s to ask about her cared was watching uncle she knew from his expression that he was not listening to aunt but his own thoughts and that he would interrupt her he did will where c n i get an extra pair of for this coat and d want to pay too much well guess could make you up a pair but if i were you i d drop into ike s his prices are lower than the bon ton s got the new stove in your office yet no been looking at some at sam s but well y ought get t in don t do to put off getting a stove all summer and then have it come cold on you in the smiled upon them do you mind if i slip up to bed i m rather tired cleaned the up stairs today she retreated she was certain that they were discussing her and her she lay awake till she heard the distant of a bed which indicated that had retired then she felt safe it was who brought up the matter of the at breakfast with no visible connection he said uncle whit is kind of clumsy but just the same he s a pretty wise he s certainly making good with the store smiled and was pleased that she had come to her senses as whit says after all the first thing is to have the inside of a house right and dam the people on the outside looking it seemed settled that the house was to be a sound example of the sam school made much of it entirely for her and the baby he spoke of for her and a sewing room but when he drew on a leaf from an old account book he was a paper and a string the plans for the he gave much more attention to a floor and a work bench and a than he had to sewing rooms she sat back and was afraid in the present there were odd things a step up from the hall to the dining room a in th shed and bush but the new place would be smooth fixed it was probable now that was past forty and settled that this would be the last venture he would ever make in building so long as she stayed in this she would always have a possibility of change but once she was in the new house there she would sit for all the rest of her life there she would die desperately she wanted to put it os against the chance of main street was chattering about a patent swing for the she saw the swing doors of a prison she never voluntarily returned to the project stepped drawing plans and in ten days the new house was forgotten every year since their marriage had longed for a trip through the east every year had talked of attending the american medical association and then afterwards we could do the east up brown i know new york dean through spent pretty near a week there but i would like to see new england and all these historic places and have some sea food he talked of it from february to may and in may he invariably decided that coming cases or land would prevent his getting away from home base for very long this year and no sense going till we can do it ri t the weariness of dish washing had increased her desire to go she pictured herself looking at s bathing hi a surf of and ivory wearing a and a summer fur meeting an aristocratic stranger in the ring had s pose you d like to get in a good long tour this summer but with and away and so many depending on me don t see how i can make it by i fed like a not taking you all this restless july after she had tasted s disturbing flavor of and gaiety she wanted to go but she said nothing they spoke of and postponed a trip to the twin cities when she suggested	42
were the attractions two hot dog stands a and pop com stand a round and in whidi balls might be thrown at rag if one wished to throw balls at rag the dignified were shy of the but country boys with brick red necks and pale blue ties and bright yellow shoes o had t into town in somewhat dusty and were drinking pop out of bottles and riding the crimson and gold horses they f and the merry go round out monotonous music the ba ed here s your chance here s your come on here boy come on here give that a good give her a swell here s your chance to win a d for five cents half a the main street part of a the sun the street with shafts that were like poisonous thorns the above the brick stores were glaring the breeze scattered dust on who crawled along in ti new shoes up two blocks and back up two and back wondering what to do next working at having a good time s head ached as she behind the along the block of she at let s be let s ride on the merry go round and a ring considered it and to think you folks would like to stop and try a ride on the merry considered it and to his wife think you d like to stop and try a ride on the merry go round mrs smiled in a washed out manner and oh no i don t believe i care to much but you fc go ahead and try it stated to no i don t believe we care to a lot but you folks go ahead and try it the whole case against s it some other time she gave it up she looked at the town she saw that in from main street to main street she had not stirred there were the same two story brick with lodge signs above the the same one story wooden shop the same fire brick the same at the open end of the wide street the same people wondering whether the levity of eating a hot dog would break their they reached at nine in the evening ou look kind of hot said is an town don t you think so she broke no i think it s an ash heap why he worried over it for a week while he ground his i ate with his knife as he pursued fragments of bacon he peeped at her chapter s an she s hut shell get over it but i wish she d hurry iq iti what she can t understand is tliat a fellow medicine in a town like this has got to cut out the hi stuff and not all his time going to and shining his shoes not but what he mi t be just as good at all these intellectual and art things as some other folks if he had the time for dr will was brooding in his office during a free moment toward the end of the summer afternoon he down in his desk chair a of his shirt glanced at the state news in the back of the journal of the american medical association dropped the magazine leaned back with his ri t thumb in the arm hole of his and his left thumb the back ci his hair by she s taking an awful big chance though you d expect her to learn by and by that i won t be a parlor she says we try to make her over well she s always trying to make me over from a perfectly good m d into a damn poet with a she d have a fit if she knew how many women would be willing to up to friend wiu and him if he d give em the chance there s still a few that think old man isn t so dam fm glad all that woman game since been married but be if i fed tempted to shine up to some girl that has sense to take life as it is some that doesn t want to talk all the time but fast hold my hand and say yoa look all in honey take it easy and don t try to talk thinks she s such a whale at folks giving the town the once over telling us where we get off she d simply turn up her toes and if she found out how she doesn t know about the i old times a wise could have in this on the q t if he wasn t faithful to his wife but i am at that no matter what faults she s main street got there s nobody here no nor in either that s as nice looking and square and bright as she ought to of been an artist or a writer or one of those things but once she took a shot at living here she ought to stick by it pretty lord yes but cold she simply doesn t know what passion is i e simply hasn t got an i how hard it is for a full blooded man to go on pretending to be satisfied with just being endured it gets awful tiresome having to feel like a criminal just because i m normal she s getting so she doesn t even care for my kissing her well i guess i can weather it same as i did earning my way school and getting started in practise but i wonder how long i can stand being an in my own home he sat up at the entrance of mrs she into a chair and gasped with the heat he chuckled well well thb is fine where s the list what cause do i get robbed for this trip i	42
haven t any list wilt i want to see you and you a christian have you given that up what next new thought or no i have not given it up es me it s kind of a knock on the you coming to see a no it isn t it s just that my faith isn t strong yet so there and besides you are kind of will i mean as a man not just as a doctor you re so strong and placid he sat on the edge of his desk his swinging c n with the thick gold line of his watch chain across the gap his hand in his trousers pockets his big arms bent and easy as she he cocked an interested eye was faded her emotions were moist and her figure was and arms with thick ankles and a body that was in the wrong places but her skin was delicious her eyes were alive her chestnut hair shone and there was a tender slope from her ears to the shadowy place below her jaw with unusual solicitude he uttered his stock phrase well what seems to be the matter i ve got such a all the time i m afraid the trouble that you treated me for is coming back any definite signs of it n no but i think you d better examine me don t believe it s necessary to be between old friends i think your troubles are mostly imaginary i can t really advise you to have an examination she flushed looked out of the window he was conscious that his voice was not and even i e turned quickly will you always say my troubles are imaginary why cant you be scientific i ve been reading an article about these new nerve and they claim that lots of imaginary yes and lots of real pain too are they call and they order a change in a woman s way of living so she can get on a higher i wait up wait don t mix up your science and your they re two entirely different you ll be mixing in next you re as bad as with your why good lord i could talk about and and and and just as well as any damn if i got paid for it if i was in the city and had the nerve to charge the that those fellows do if a stung you for a hundred dollar consultation fee and you to go to new york to duck s you d do it to save the hundred dollars but you know me fm your neighbor you see me the lawn you figure fm just a general if i said go to new york and you would laugh your heads off and say took at the airs will is putting on what does he think he is as a matter of fact you re right you have a perfectly well developed case of of sex instinct and it raises the old ned with your body what you n is to get away from and travel yes and go to every dog gone kind of new thought and and and meeting you can find i know it well s you do but how can i advise it would be up here taking my hide i m willing to be family physician and priest and lawyer and and wet nurse but i draw the line at making up on money too hard a job in weather like this so my dear believe it will rain if this heat keeps but will he d never give it to me on my say so he d never let me go away you know how is so and liberal in society and oh just loves to match quarters and such a perfect sport if he loses but at home he a main street till the l i have to him for every dollar sure i know but it s your fight honey keep after him he d simply resent my in he crossed over and patted her shoulder outside the window beyond the fly screen that was with dust and main street was hushed except for the impatient throb of a standing car she took his firm hand pressed his against her x n is so mean and little and noisy the you re so calm when he s cutting up at parties i see you back and watching him the way a a he for professional dignity with s not a bad she released his hand will drop round by the house this evening and me make me be good and sensible and fm so lonely if i did would be and we d have to play cards if s his evening off from the no the just got called to mother sick win be in the store till midnight come on over s some lovely beer on the ice and we can sit and talk and be all cool and lazy that wouldn t be wrong of us would no no course it wouldn t be wrong but still ou to he saw card slim black and ivory scornful of au right but hi be so her throat seemed young above her loose of muslin and machine lace ten you fu drop in just for a minute if i happen to be down that way if you d o i just want comfort i know you re au married aod my such a proud pi a and of course now if i could just sit near you in the dusk and be quiet and forget you will come sure i tn expect you m be lonely if you don t come by he cursed himself what d i to go for ni have to keep my promise or she n fed hurt s ie a good	42
decent affectionate girl and s a au right she s got more life to her than card has an my anyway why can t i be more like and and the rest of the oh i am but such a demanding idiot deliberately me into going up there tonight matter of principle ou not to let her get away wi it i won t go i ll call her up and her i won t go me with at home finest little w in the and a minded female like no though there s no need of her feelings i may just drop in for a second to tell her i can t stay all my fault anyway ought never to have started in and along in the old days if it s my fault i ve no right to punish i could just drop in for a second and then pretend i had a country call and beat it damn nuisance having to up excuses lord why can t the women let you alone just because once or twice seven hundred million years ago you were a poor fool why cant they let you forget it s own fault stay strictly away take to the and forget but it would be kind of hot at the tonight he fled from himself he on his hat threw his coat over his arm the door locked it downstairs i won t he said and as he said it he would have given a good deal to know whether he was going he was refreshed as always by the familiar windows and faces it restored his soul to have sam better come down to the lake this evening and have a swim ain t you going to open your cottage at all this summer by we miss you he noted the progress on the new he had in the laying of every course of bricks in them he had seen the growth of the town his pride was ushered back to its throne by the of the woman is a lot better that was swell medicine you gave her he was by the of the tasks at home burning the gray web of a tent worm on the wild cherry tree with a cut in the it front tire of the car the road before the house the was cool to his hands as the bright arrows fell with a faint sound a of blackness was formed in the gray dust came along where going down to the store just had supper main street thursday s your night off sure but went his mother s supposed to be sick these clerks you get nowadays em and then they won t that s tough have to work dear up till twelve then up better drop in and have a cigar if you re ell i may at that may have to go down and see mrs c she s so long had not yet entered the house he was conscious that card was near him that she was important that he was afraid of her but he was content to be alone when he had finished he strolled into the house up to the baby s room and cried to for die old man c card was in a low chair framed and by the window behind her an image in pale gold the baby curled in her li his head on her arm listening with gravity while she sang from field tis little in the morning tis little at night and all day long tis the same dear song of that growing knowing was enchanted i should say when the current maid up stairs supper on de table was upon his back flapping his hands in the earnest effort to be a seal thrilled by the strength with his son kicked he slipped his arm about s shoulder he went down to supper rejoicing that he was of perilous stuff while was putting the baby to bed be sat on the front steps tailor and came to sit beside between waves of his hand as he drove off say you d m t fed like imagining you re a again and coming out for a time tonight do you you know this new mrs swell dame with hair well she s a pretty good me and harry are going to take her and that fat that works in the bon ton nice kid on an ride maybe well drive down to that farm harry we re taking some beer and some of the you ever laid tongue to fm not none but if we don t have a miss my guess to it no off my ear think i want to be fifth wheel in the o but look here the little has a friend with her from and some gay bird and harry and me maybe you d like to off for one evening no rats now forget your everlasting dignity you used to be a pretty good sport yourself when you were foot free it may have been the fact that mrs s friend remained to an ill it may have been voice wistful in the pallid evening as she sang to it may have been and virtue but certainly he was positive fm married for keeps don t pretend to be any saint like to get out and raise and shoot a few drinks but a fellow owes a duty straight now won t you fed like a you come back to the after your me my moral in life is what they don t know wont hurt em none the way to handle wives like the fellow says is to catch em early treat em rough and tell em well that s your business i suppose but i cant get away with it besides that way i figure it	42
seasons of she said to i we re two fat old round uie world and he echoed her round round the high adventure the secret place to they both fled was the house of miles and and steadily of the he protested what do you want to talk to that for he hinted that a former hired girl was low any for the son of dr win she did not lain she did not quite understand it herself did not know in the she found her friends her club her sympathy and her of blessed for a time the gossip of and the j y seventeen had been a refuge from the of aunt but the relief had not continued the young made her nervous they talked so always so loud they filled a room with dashing their and they repeated nine times over and every one save mrs dr and the friends whom she did not know as friends die to the red was the most heroic and powerful person in the world with adoration he trotted after while miles fed the cows chased his one an animal of and instincts or a chicken and to was lord mortal men less than the old monarch king but more understanding of the relations and of things of small sticks lone playing cards and injured ho saw though she did not admit that was not only more beautiful than her own dark child but more gracious was a straight sunny haired large re amiable to his subjects was a a bustling business man it was that and said let s play that opened luminous blue eyes and agreed all right in gentleness if him and did bat him af was but shocked in magnificent solitude he marched toward the house his sin and the of august favor the two friends played with an imperial chariot which miles had made out of a box and four red together they stuck into a mouse hole with vast satisfaction though entirely without known results the and humming gave and to both children and if refused a cup of coffee and a of she was deserted miles had done well with his he had six cows two hundred chickens a cream a ford in the spring he had built a two room addition to his that illustrious building was to a uncle miles did the most unexpected things ran up the ladder stood on the ridge waving a hammer and singing something about to arms my citizens nailed faster than aunt could iron handkerchiefs and lifted a six with riding on one end and on the other uncle miles s most trick was to make figures not cm paper but right on a new pine board with the pencil in the world there was a thing worth the tools in his office father had tools fascinating in their and curious shapes but they were sharp ti were main street something called and they distinctly were not for boys to touch in fact it was a good to i must not touch when you looked at the tools on the glass shelves in father s office but uncle miles who was a person altogether superior to father let you handle all his except the there was a hammer with a silver head there was a metal thing like a big l there was a magic instrument very precious made out of costly red wood and gold with a which contained a no it wasn t a drop it was a nothing which lived in the water but the nothing looked like a drop and it ran in a way up and down the no matter how cautiously you the magic instrument and there were nails very different and clever big middle sized ones which were not very interesting and nails much than the up in the yellow book n while he had worked on the addition miles had talked frankly to he admitted now that so long as he stayed in he would remain a s friends were as much offended by his as the merchants by his and i can t seem to keep my mouth shut i think fm being a and not springing any theories than c a t cat but when folks have i been stepping on their pet religious oh the mill keeps dropping in and that and one fellow from elder s factory and a few but you know be big good hearted like her wants a lot of folks around likes to fuss over em never satisfied unless she s herself out making coffee for somebody once she me and me to the church i goes in pious as widow and sits still and never cracks a smile while the preacher is us with his on but afterwards when the old were everybody at the door and calling em and sister they let me sail right by with a they figure fm the town always will be i guess have to be who goes on and sometimes blamed if i don t feel like coming out and saying been nothing to it now fm going to start something in these rotten one horse lumber west of town but be s got me lord mrs do you what a jolly square faithful woman she is and i love oh well i won t go and get sentimental on you course i ve had of pulling up and going west maybe if they didn t know it beforehand they wouldn t find out i d ever been guilty of trying to think for myself but i ve worked hard and built up this business and i hate to start all over again and move be and the kid into another one room that s how they get encourage us to be and own our own houses and then by they ve got us they	42
know we won t dare risk everything by committing what is it majesty i mean they know we won t be around that if we had a co bank we could get along without well as long as i can sit and play with be and tell to about his s adventures in the woods and how he a and knew paul why i don t mind being a bum it s just for them i mind don t whisper a word to be but when i get this addition done i m going to buy her a he did while she was busy with the her work hungry muscles found washing mending preserving a chicken painting the sink tasks which because she was miles s full partner were exciting and listened to the records with rapture like that of cattle in a warm stable the addition gave her a kitchen with a bedroom above the original one room was now a living room with the h a genuine leather oak and a picture of governor m johnson in late july card went to the desirous of a chance to express her opinion of and and she found restless from a it fever and flushed and dizzy but trying to keep up her work she miles aside and worried they t look at all well what s the matter their are out of i wanted to call in be thinks the doesn t like us she thinks maybe he s sore because you come down here but i m getting worried i m going to call the at once main street she over his eyes were stupid he moaned he rubbed his forehead have they been eating something that s been bad for them she fluttered to miles be bum water ill tell you we used to get our water at s place over across the street but kept at me and i was a not to dig a well of my own one time he said sure you are great on up other folks money and water i knew if he kept it up there d be a fuss and i ain t safe to have around once a fuss starts fm likely to forget myself and let loose with a punch in the i offered to pay but he refused he d rather have the chance to kid me so i starts getting water down at mrs s in the hollow there and i don t believe it s real good to dig my own weu this fall one scarlet word was before s eyes while she listened she fled to s office he gravely heard her out nodded said e right over he examined and he shook his head yes looks to me like i ve seen in lumber groaned miles all the strength dripping out of him have they got it very bad oh we ll take good care of them said and for the first time in their acquaintance he smiled on miles and clapped his shoulder wont you need a nurse demanded why to miles hinted couldn t you get s cousin she s down at the old folks in the country then let me do it insisted they need some one to cook for them and isn t it good to give them in yes all right was he was the official the physician i guess probably it would be hard to get a nurse here in town just now mrs is busy with an case and that town nurse of yours is off on ain t she all right can spell you at ni t all week from eight each morning till midnight fed them bathed them smoothed sheets took miles refused to let her cook terrified pallid noiseless in feet he did the kitchen work and the sweeping his big red hands awkwardly careful came in three times a day y tender and hopeful in the polite to miles understood how great was her love for her friends it bore her through it made her arm steady and to them what exhausted her was the sight of and turned into after taking food begging for the healing of sleep at night during the second week s powerful l were spots of a delicate pink came out on his chest and back his cheeks sank he looked frightened his tongue was brown and his confident voice to a bewildered murmur ceaseless and had stayed on her feet too long at the beginning the moment had ordered her to bed she had begun to one early evening she startled them by screaming in an intense pain and within half an hour she was in a delirium till dawn was with her and not all of s groping through the blackness of half pain was so pitiful to as the way in which miles silently peered into the room from the top of the narrow stairs card slept three hours next morning and ran back was altogether but she muttered nothing save af ve have such a good time at ten while was preparing an ice bag in the kitchen miles answered a knock at the front door she saw and mrs wife of the they were carrying grapes and women s magazines magazines with high colored pictures and fiction we just heard your wife was sick we ve come to see if there isn t something we can do miles looked steadily at the three women you re too late you can t do noting now s always kind of hoped you folks would come see her she wanted to have a chance and be friends she used to sit waiting for somebody to knock i ve seen her sitting here waiting now oh you ain t worth god he shut the door all day watched s strength he was his ribs were grim	42
clear lines his skin was his pulse was feeble but rapid it beat beat beat in a drum of death late that afternoon he sobbed and died did not know it she was next morning when she went she did not know that would no main street swing his sword on the door step no longer rule his subjects of the cattle yard that miles s son would not go east to college miles were silent they washed the bodies together their eyes veiled go home now and sleep you re pretty tired i can t ever pay you back for what you done miles whispered to tes but be back here tomorrow go with you to the funeral she said laboriously when the time for the came was in bed she assumed that neighbors would go they had not told her that word of miles s to had spread through town a fury it was only by chance that leaning on her elbow in bed she glanced through the window and saw the funeral of and there was no music no carriages there was only miles in his black wedding suit walking quite alone head down behind the shabby that bore the bodies of his wife and baby an hour after came into her room crying and when she said as cheerily as she could what is it dear he i want to go play with that afternoon dropped in to s ie said too bad about this that was your hired girl but i don t waste any sympathy on that man of hers everybody says he drank too much and treated his family awful and how they got sick chapter v a letter from in france said that he had been sent to the front been slightly wounded been made a captain from s pride sought to draw a to rouse her from depression miles had sold his he had several thousand dollars to he said good by with a word a harsh hand shake going to buy a farm in northern far off from folks as i can get he turned sharply away but he did not walk with his former spring his shoulders seemed it was said that before he went he cursed the town there was talk of him of riding him on a it was that at the station old him ou better not come back here got respect for your dead but we haven t got any for a and a traitor that won t do anything for his country and only bought one liberty bond some of the people who had been at the station declared that miles made some dreadful retort something about loving german more than american but others asserted that he couldn t find one word with ch to answer the that he merely up on the platform of the train he must have felt guilty everybody agreed for as the train left town a farmer saw standing in the and looking out his with the addition which he had built four months was very near the track on which his train passed when card went there for the last time she found s chariot with its red wheels standing in the sunny comer beside the stable she wondered if a quick eye could have noticed it from a train that day and that week she went reluctantly to red cross work she and packed silently while read the war and she said nothing at all when commented from what says i guess was a bad egg after all in spite of don t know but what the citizens committee ought to have forced him to be patriotic et on like they could send him to jail if he didn t and come through for bonds and the y m c a they ve that fine with all these german farmers n she found no inspiration but she did find a kindness in mrs and at last she yielded to the woman s and had relief in sobbing the story of she often met on the street but he was merely a pleasant voice which said things about charles lamb and her most positive experience was the revelation of mrs main street the tall thin wife of the attorney encountered her at the store walking snapped mrs why yes guess you re the only female in this town that the use of her legs come home and have a cup o tea with me because she had nothing else to do went but she was uncomfortable in the presence of the amused which mrs s drew today in august she wore a man s cap a fur like a dead cat a of imitation pearls a satin and a thick doth skirt up in front come in sit down stick the baby in that hope you don t mind the house looking like a rat s nest you like this town neither do i said mrs i why course you don t well then i don t but i m sure that some day find some solution probably i m a solution find the hole was very brisk how do you know you ever will find it there s mrs she s naturally a big city woman she ought to have a lovely old house in philadelphia or boston but she escapes by being absorbed in reading you be satisfied to never do anything but read no but heavens one can t go on a town always why not i can i ve hated it for thirty two years ill die here and hate it till i die i ought to have been a business woman i had a good deal of talent for tending to figures all gone now some folks think i m crazy guess i am sit and go to church and sing hymns	42
folks think i m religious tut trying to forget washing and and mending want an office of my own and things never hear of it too late card sat on the couch and sank into fear could this of life keep up forever then would she some day so despise herself and her neighbors that she too would walk main street an old eccentric woman in a cat s fur as she crept home she felt that the trap had finally closed she went into the house a frail small woman still but hopeless of eye as she staggered with the weight of the drowsy boy in her arms sat alone on the porch that evening it seemed that had to make a professional call on mrs under the and the black of dusk the street was in silence there was but the hum of the road the of a on the porch the slap of a hand attacking a a conversation starting and dying the precise of the of against the screen sounds that were a silence it was a street beyond the end of the world beyond the boundaries of hope though she should sit here forever no brave procession no one who was interesting would be coming by it was made a street of and of appeared with she and when her ear in village love they strolled with the half dancing gait of lovers kicking their feet out sideways or shuffling a dragging and the walk sounded to the broken two four their voices had a dusky suddenly to the woman rocking on the porch of the doctor s house the night came alive and she felt that everywhere in the darkness panted an ardent quest which she was missing as she sank back to wait for must be something chapter o it was at a supper of the jolly seventeen in august that heard of elizabeth from mrs was fond of because she had been agreeable lately had obviously repented of the nervous which she had once shown patted her hand when they met and asked about said that he was kind of sorry for the girl some ways she s too dam but still is sort of mean to her he was polite to poor when they au went down to the cottages for a was proud main street of that sympathy in him and now she took pains to sit with their new friend mrs was oh have you folks heard about this young fellow that s just come to town that the boys call elizabeth he s working in s tailor shop i bet he doesn t make eighteen a week but my isn t he the perfect lady though he talks so refined and oh the he puts on coat and collar with a gold pin and to match his and honest you won t believe this but i got it straight this fellow you know he s staying at mrs s old boarding house and they say he asked mrs if he ought to put on a dress suit for supper imagine can you beat that and him nothing but a tailor his name is but he used to be in a tailor shop in they do say he s a smart needle at that and he tries to let on that he s a regular city fellow they say he tries to make people think he s a carries books around and to read em says she met him at a dance and he was around all over the place and he asked her did she like flowers and poetry and music and everything he like he was a regular united states and she s a devil that girl ha ha she him along and got him going and honest what d you think he said he said he didn t find any intellectual companionship in this town can you beat it imagine and him a tailor my and they say he s the most awful looks just like a girl the boys call him elizabeth and they stop him and ask about the books he lets on to have read and he goes and tells them and they take it all in and jolly him terribly and he never gets the fact they re him oh i think it s just too funny the jolly seventeen laughed and laughed with them mrs jack elder added that this had confided to mrs that he would love to design clothes for women imagine mrs had had a glimpse of him but honestly she d thought he was awfully handsome this was instantly by mrs b j wife of the banker mrs had had she reported a good look at this fellow she and b j had been and passed elizabeth out by s bridge he was wearing the clothes with the waist pinched in like a girl s he was sitting on a rock doing nothing but when he heard the car coming he snatched a book out of his pocket and as they went by he pretended to be reading it to show off and he wasn t really good looking just kind of soft as b j had pointed out when the husbands came they joined in the my name is elizabeth vm the celebrated musical tailor the skirts fall for me by the thou do i get some more loaf merrily shrieked he had some admirable stories about the tricks the town had played oa they had dropped a perch into his pocket they had pinned on his back a sign i m the prize kick me glad of any laughter joined the and surprised them by crying i do think you re the dearest thing since you got your hair cut that was an excellent sally everybody applauded looked proud she decided that sometime she really must	42
go out of her way to pass s shop and see this n she was at sunday morning service at the church in a solemn row with her husband uncle aunt despite aunt s the rarely attended church doctor asserted sure religion is a fine influence got to have it to keep the lower classes in order fact it s the only thing that appeals to a lot of those fellows and makes em respect the rights of property and i guess this is o k lot of wise old figured it all out and they knew more about it than we do he believed in the christian religion and never thought about it he believed in the church and seldom went near it he was shocked by s lack of faith and wasn t quite sure what was the nature of the faith that she lacked herself was an uneasy and when she ventured to sunday school and heard the teachers that the of was a valuable problem for children to think about when she with wednesday prayer meeting and listened to elders giving their weekly testimony in primitive and such phrases as washed in the blood of the lamb and a god when mrs boasted that through his boyhood she had made confess nightly upon the basis of the ten main street then was dismayed to find the christian religion in america in the twentieth century as as without the splendor but when she went to church and felt the friendliness saw the gaiety with which the sisters served cold ham and potatoes when mrs cried to her on an afternoon call my dear if you just knew how happy it makes you to come into abiding grace then found the behind the and alien always she perceived that the churches catholic all of them which had seemed so unimportant to the judge s home in her childhood so isolated from the city struggle in st paul were still in the strongest of the forces compelling respectability this august sunday she had been tempted by the an that the reverend would preach on the topic america face your problems with the great war workmen in every nation showing a desire to control russia a revolution against woman coming there seemed to be plenty of problems for the reverend mr to call on america to face gathered her family and trotted off behind uncle the congregation faced the heat with men with highly hair so painfully shaved that their faces looked sore removed their coats sighed and two buttons of their sunday large white hot the mothers in and friends of mrs waved their palm leaf in a steady abashed boys into the rear and while little girls up front with their mothers self kept from turning around the church was half bam and half parlor the brown was broken in its dismal sweep only by framed come unto me and the lord is my by a list of and by a crimson and green drawn upon colored paper indicating the alarming ease with which a young man may descend from palaces of pleasure and the house of pride to eternal but the oak and the new red carpet and the three large chairs on the platform behind the bare reading stand were all of a chair comfort was and and today she beamed and bowed she out with the others the hymn how pleasant tis on sabbath mom to gather in the church and there fu have no nor sin shall me with a rustle of linen skirts and stiff shirt fronts the congregation sat down and gave heed to the reverend mr the priest was a thin intense young man with a bang he wore a black sack suit and a tie he smote the enormous bible on the reading stand x ome let us reason together delivered a prayer informing almighty god of the news of the past week and began to reason it proved that the only problems which america had to face were and don t let any of these self conceited fellows that are always trying to stir up trouble deceive you with the belief that there s anything to all these smart movements to let the and uie farmers league kill all our and enterprise by fixing wages and prices there isn t any movement that to a without it s got a moral background and let me tell you that while folks are about what they call and and science and a lot of things that are nothing in the but a disguise for the old satan is busy spreading his secret net and out there in under his guise oi joe smith or young or whoever their leaders happen to be today it doesn t make any difference and they re making game of the old bible that has led this american people through its manifold trials and to its firm position as the of the and the recognized leader of all nations sit thou on my right hand till i make thine enemies the of my feet said the lord of hosts acts ii the thirty fourth verse and let me tell you right now you got to get up a good deal earlier in the morning than you get up even when you re going fishing if you want to be than the lord who has shown us the t and narrow way and he that is in eternal peril and to return to this vital and terrible subject of and as i say it is terrible to realize how little attention is given to this evil right here in our midst and on main street our very as it were it s a shame and a disgrace that the of these united states all its time talking about financial matters that ought to be left to the	42
treasury department as i understand it instead of arising in their might and passing a law that any one admitting he is a shall simply be and as it were kicked out of this free country in which we haven t got any room for and the of satan and to for a moment especially as there are more of them in this state than there are thou you never can tell what will happen with this vain generation of young girls that think more about wearing silk stockings than about their mothers and learning to a good loaf of bread and many of them listening to these and i actually heard one of them talking right out on a street corner in a few years ago and the of the law not protesting but still as they are a smaller but more immediate problem let me stop for just a moment to pay my respects to these seventh day not that they are i don t mean but when a body of men go on that saturday is the sabbath after christ himself has clearly indicated the new then i think the ought to step in at this point awoke she got through three more minutes by studying the face of a in the across a sensitive unhappy girl whose longing poured out with self revelation as she mr wondered who the girl was she had seen her at church she considered how many of the three thousand people in the town she did not know to bow many of them the and the jolly seventeen were icy social peaks how many of them might be toiling thicker than her own with greater courage she examined her nails she read two hymns she got some satisfaction out of rubbing an she on her shoulder the head of the baby who after killing time in the same manner as his mother was so fortunate as to fall asleep she read the introduction title page and acknowledgment of in the she tried to a philosophy which explain why could never tie his so that it would reach the top of the gap in his turn down collar there were no other to be found in the she glanced back at the congregation she thought that it would be amiable to bow to mrs her slow turning head stopped across the aisle two rows back was a strange young man who shone among the citizens like a from the sun curls low forehead fine nose chin smooth but not raw from sabbath his lips startled her the lips of men in are flat in the face straight and the stranger s mouth was arched the upper lip short he wore a brown coat a blue bow a white silk shirt white flannel trousers he suggested the ocean beach a court anything but the sun utility of main street a visitor from here for business no he wasn t a business man he was a poet was in his face and and arthur whom she had once seen in he was at once too sensitive and too to touch business as she knew it in with restrained amusement he was the noisy mr was ashamed to have this spy from the great world hear the s she felt responsible for the town she resented his gaping at their private rites she flushed turned away but she continued to feel his presence how could she meet him she must for an hour of talk he was all that she was hungry for she could not let him get away without a word and she would have to she pictured and herself as walking up to him and remarking i am sick with the village will you please tell me what people are saying and playing in new york she pictured and groaned over the expression of if she should say why wouldn t it be reasonable for you my soul to ask that complete stranger in the brown coat to come to supper tonight she not looking back she warned herself that she was probably that no young man could have all these exalted qualities wasn t he too obviously smart too glossy new like a actor probably he was a who sang tenor and fancied himself in tions of clothes and spoke of the business proposition that ever came down the in a panic she peered at him no this was no this boy with the lips and the serious eyes she rose after the service carefully taking s arm and smiling at him in a mute assertion that she was main street devoted to him no matter what happened she followed the mystery s soft brown shoulders out of the church the shrill and son of his hand at the beautiful stranger and how s the kid all up like a horse today ain t we was exceeding sick her herald from the outside was elizabeth tailor ine and hot goose mending dirty respectfully holding a ti measure about a and yet she insisted this boy was also himself m they had sunday dinner with the in a dining room which about a fruit and flower piece and a of uncle did not heed aunt s in regard to mrs robert b s bead and s error in putting on the striped day like this she did not taste the of roast pork she said will i wonder if that young man in the white flannel trousers at church this morning was this person that they re all talking about that s him wasn t that the get up he had on scratched at a white on his hard gray sleeve it wasn t so bad i wonder where he comes from he seems to have lived in cities a good deal is he from the east the east him why he comes from a farm	42
over to greet and to look here don t you suppose you better be thinking about turning in i ve got a hard day tomorrow the two were talking so intimately that they constantly interrupted each other as she went home by a husband and holding up her skirts rejoiced everything has changed i have two friends and but who s the other that s queer i thought there was oh how absurd she often passed on the street the brown coat became when she was driving with in early evening she saw him on the lake shore reading a thin book which might easily have been poetry she noted that he was the only person in the town who stiu took long walks she told herself that she was the daughter of a judge the wife of a doctor and that she did not care to know a tailor she told herself that she was not to men not even to she told herself that a woman of thirty who h ed a boy of twenty five was ridiculous and on friday when she had convinced herself that the errand was necessary she went to s shop bearing the not very romantic burden of a pair of her husband s trousers was in the back room she faced the greek god who in a somewhat way was a coat on a sewing machine in a room of plaster walls main street she saw that his hands were not in keeping with a face they were thick with needle and hot iron and handle even in the shop he persisted in his finery he wore a silk shirt a thin tan shoes this she absorbed while she was saying can i get these pressed please not rising from the sewing machine he stuck out his hand when do you want them oh monday the adventure was over she was marching out what name he called after her he had risen and despite the of dr will s trousers draped over his arm he had the grace of a cat oh oh say you re mrs dr then aren t you yes she stood at the door now that she had carried out her preposterous impulse to see what he was like she was cold she was as ready to detect as the virtuous miss i ve heard about you was saying you got up a dramatic club and gave a play i ve always wished i had a chance to belong to a little and give some european plays or like or a he pronounced it he with rag nodded in the manner of a lady being kind to a and one of her selves sneered our is indeed a lost john he was appealing do you suppose it would be possible to get up another dramatic club this coming fall well it might be worth thinking of she came out of her several conflicting and said sincerely there s a new teacher miss who might have some talent that would make three of us for a if we could scrape up half a dozen we might give a real play with a small cast have you had any experience just a bum club that some of us got up in when i was working there we had one good man an interior maybe he was kind of and but he really was an artist and we gave one play but i of course i ve always had to work hard and study by myself and i m probably and i d love it if i had training in i mean the the was the better like it if you didn t want to use me as an actor i d love to design the i m crazy about and colors and designs she knew that he was trying to keep her from going trying to indicate that he was something more than a person to whom one brought trousers for pressing he some day i hope i can get away from this fool when i have the money saved up i want to go east and work for some big and study art drawing and become a high class or do you think that s a kind of ambition for a fellow i was brought up on a farm and then round with i don t know what do you think says you re awfully educated i am awfully tell me have the boys made fun oi your ambition she was seventy years old and and more than well they have at that they ve me a good deal here and both they say is ladies work but i was willing to get for the war i tried to get in but they rejected me but i did try i thought some of working up in a store and i had a chance to travel on the road for a clothing house but somehow i hate this but i can t seem to get enthusiastic about i keep thinking about a room in gray paper with prints in very narrow gold frames or would it be better in white but anyway it looks out on fifth avenue and i m a he made it too ous robe of green over cloth of gold you know it s elegant what do you think why not what do you care for the opinion of city or a lot of farm boys but you mustn t you really mustn t let casual strangers like me have a chance to judge you well you aren t a stranger one way miss should say she s spoken about you so often i wanted to call on you and the doctor but i didn t quite have the nerve one evening i walked past your house but you and your husband were talking on	42
the porch and you looked so and happy i didn t dare butt in i think it s extremely nice of you to want to be trained in in by a stage perhaps i main could help you fm a thoroughly sound and am by instinct quite hopelessly mature oh you aren t either was not very successful at accepting his with the air of amused woman of the world but she sounded reasonably thank you shall we see if we really can get up a new dramatic club ill tell you come to the house this evening about eight ill ask miss to come over and well talk about it vi he has absolutely no sense of less than will but hasn t he what is a sense of humor isn t the thing he the back that passes for humor here anyway poor lamb me to stay and play with poor lonely lamb if he could be free from from people who say and bum would he develop i wonder if didn t use back street as a boy no not he s sensitive to silken things innumerable of and splendid as are the s deep d wings here a bewildered spirit fallen on main street and main street laughs till it till the spirit doubts his own self and tries to give up die use of wings for the correct uses of a store with its celebrated eleven miles of walk i wonder how much of the is made out of the of john vn was cordial to her told her he was a great hand for running off with pretty and promised that if the school board should object to her dancing he would bat em one over the head and tell em how lucky they were to get a with some go to her for once but to he was not cordial he shook hands loosely and said h are was acceptable he had been here for years and owned his shop but this person was merely s workman and the town s principle of perfect was not meant to be applied the conference on a dramatic included but he sat back patting conscious of ankles smiling on the children at their sport wanted to tell her was sulky every time she thought of the girl from it was who made suggestions he had read with breadth and lack of judgment his voice was sensitive to but he the word glorious he a tenth of the words he had from books but he knew it he was but he was shy when he demanded like to stage suppressed desires by cook and miss ceased to be he was not the he was the artist sure of his vision make it simple use a big window at the back with a of a blue that would simply hit you in the eye and just one tree branch to suggest a park below put the breakfast table on a let the colors be kind of and orange chairs and orange and blue table and blue breakfast set and some place one big flat of black bang oh another play i wish we could do is s the black mask i ve never seen it but glorious ending where this woman looks at the man with his face all blown away and she just gives one horrible scream good god is that your idea of a glorious ending that sounds fierce i i do love artistic things but not the horrible ones moaned was bewildered glanced at she nodded at the end of the conference they had decided nothing chapter y she had walked up the railroad track with this sunday afternoon s ie saw coming in an ancient suit sullenly and alone striking at the rails with a main street stick for a second she wanted to avoid him but she kept on and she serenely talked about god voice asserted made the in the telegraph wires stared straightened they greeted each other with hu say how do you do to mr oh dear me he s got a button worried kneeling frowned then noted the strength with which he swung the baby in the air may i walk along a piece with you i m tired let s rest on those ties then i must be trotting back they sat on a heap of discarded railroad ties oak logs spotted with colored dry rot and marked with brown streaks where iron plates had rested learned that the pile was the hiding place of he went for them while the elders talked of uninteresting things the telegraph wires above them the rails were glaring hard lines the dusty across the track was a pasture of dwarf and lawn cut by cow paths beyond its placid narrow green the rough of new jagged with wheat like huge talked of bo like a recent convert to any faith he exhibited as many titles and authors as possible halting only to appeal have you read his last book don t you think he s a terribly strong writer she was dizzy but when he insisted you ve been a tell me do i read too much fiction she advised him rather he had she indicated never studied he had from one emotion to another especially she hesitated then flung it at him he must not guess at he must endure the nuisance of stopping to reach for the dictionary t m talking like a teacher she sighed no and i will study read the damned dictionary right through he crossed his legs and bent over clutching his ankle with both hands i know what you mean i ve been rushing from picture to picture like a kid let loose in an art gallery for the first time you see it s so awful recent that found there was a world well a world where	42
beautiful things counted i was on the farm till i was nineteen is a good farmer but nothing else do you know why he first sent me off to learn i wanted to study drawing and he had a cousin that d made a lot of money out in and he said was a lot like drawing so he sent me down to a hole called to work in a tailor shop up to that time i d only had three months a year walked to school two miles through snow up to my knees and never would stand for my having a single book except i never read a novel till i got of hall out of the library at i thought it was the loveliest thing in the world next i read burned away and then pope s translation of some combination all right when i went to just two years ago i guess i d read pretty much everything in that library but never heard of or john or or but i ll study look here shall i get out of this this pressing and don t see why a surgeon should spend very much time shoes but what if i find i can t really draw and design after around in new york or i d feel like a fool if i had to go back to work in a store please say all right i ll remember he shrugged and spread his fingers wide she was by his humility she put away in her mind to take out and worry over later a speculation as to whether it was not she who was she urged what if you do have to go back most of us do we can t all be artists myself for instance we have to dam and yet we re not content to think of nothing but and cotton demand all i could get whether i finally settled down to or building temples or pressing what if you do drop back you ll have had the adventure don t be too meek toward life go you re young you re unmarried try everything don t listen to and sam and be a steady young man in order to help them make money you re still a blessed innocent go and play till the good people capture you but i don t just want to play i want to make something beautiful god and i don t know enough do you get it do you understand nobody else ever has do you understand yes main street and so but here s what me i like things like that little drawings and elegant words but look over there at those fields big new don t it seem kind of a shame to leave this and go back to the east and europe and do what all those people have been doing so long being careful about words when there s millions of of eat here reading this fellow when i ve helped to dear fields it s good to clear fields but it s not for you it s one of our favorite american that broad plains necessarily make broad minds and high mountains make high purpose i thought that myself when i first came to the big new oh i don t want to deny the future it will be magnificent but equally i m hanged if i want to be by it go to war on behalf of main street be and by the faith that the future is already here in the present and that all of us must stay and worship and insist that this is god s country and never of course do anything original or gay colored that would help to make that future anyway you don t belong here sam and that s what our big has produced go before it s too late as it has been for for some of us young man go east and grow up with the revolution then perhaps you may come back and tell sam and and me what to do with the land we ve been clearing if well listen if we don t you first he looked at her reverently she could hear him saying always wanted to know a woman who would talk to me like that her hearing was he was saying nothing of the sort he was saying why aren t you happy with your husband i you he doesn t care for the blessed innocent part of you does he you mustn t first you tell me to go and be free and then you say that i mustn t i know but you mustn t you must be more he at her like a young owl she wasn t sure but she thought that he muttered i m damned if i will she considered with wholesome fear the perils of with other people s and she said timidly hadn t we better start back now he mused you re younger than i am your lips are for songs about rivers in the morning and lakes at twilight i don t see how anybody could ever hurt you yes we better go he beside her his eyes averted took his thumb he looked down at the baby seriously he burst out all right ill do it ill stay here one year save not spend so much money on clothes and then go east to art school work on the tailor shop s ill learn what i m good for stage or selling to fat men all settled he peered at her can you stand it here in town for a year with you to look at please i mean don t the people here think you re an odd bird they do me i assure you i don t know i never	42
ve decided to hold the matches or whatever you call em down at the cottages at the lake instead of here the bunch are down there now and and and everybody harry wanted to know if i d bring you down i guess i can take the time come right back after supper before could sum it all up why didn t say anything to me about the change of course he s the president but looked at him heavily and i don t know a thing about it coming i am not the match was to be here and it will be here you can tell harry that he s rude she rallied the five who had been left out who would always be left out come on well toss to see which four of us play the only and original first annual of forest hills and don t know as i blame you said we ll have supper at home then he drove off she hated him for his composure he had ruined her defiance she felt much less like b as she turned to her huddled followers mrs and lost the toss the others played out the game slowly painfully stumbling on the rough earth the easiest shots watched only by the small boy and his sister beyond the court stretched the eternal fields the four awkwardly going through exercises insignificant in the hot sweep of contemptuous land were not heroic their voices did not ring out in the score but sounded and when the game was over they glanced about as though they were waiting to be laughed at they walked home took s arm through her thin linen sleeve she could feel the warmth of his familiar brown coat s ie observed that there were purple and red gold threads with the brown she remembered the first time she had seen it their talk was nothing but on the theme i never did like this he just considers his own convenience ahead of them the and spoke of the weather and b j s new no one referred to their at her gate shook hands firmly with and smiled at him next morning sunday morning when was on the porch the drove up we didn t mean to be rude to you implored wouldn t have you think that for anything we planned that will and you should come down and have supper at our cottage no fm sure you didn t mean to be was but i do think you ought to to poor he was terribly hurt oh i don t care so much what he thinks objected harry he s nothing but a conceited and i kind of figured he was trying to run this thing too dam much anyway but you asked him to make arrangements know but i don t like him good lord you hurt his feelings he dresses up like a chorus man and by he looks like one but he s nothing but a farm boy and these foreigners they all got hides like a of but he is hurt well i don t suppose i ought to have gone off and not him along i ll give him a cigar hell had been her lips and staring at she interrupted her husband yes i do think harry to fix it up with him you like him don t you over and through card ran a frightened like him i haven t an i he seems to be a very decent main street young man i just felt that when he d worked so hard on the plans for the match it was a shame not to be nice to him maybe there s something to that harry then at sight of coming round the corner the red garden by its brass he roared in relief what d you think you re trying to do while explained in detail all that he thou t he was trying to do while he rubbed his chin and gravely stated struck me the grass was looking kind of brown in patches didn t know but what i d give it a and while harry agreed that this was an excellent idea made friendly noises and behind the gilt screen of an affectionate smile watched s face iv she wanted to see she wanted some one to play with there wasn t even so dignified and sound an excuse as having s trousers pressed when she them all three pairs looked neat she probably would not have ventured on it had she not in the pool parlor being witty over bottle pool was she fluttered toward the tailor shop dashed into its heat with the comic of a humming bird dipping into a dry tiger lily it was after she had entered that she found an excuse was in the back room cross legged on a long table sewing a but he looked as though he were doing this eccentric thing to amuse himself i wonder if you couldn t plan a sports suit f me she said he stared at her he protested no i won t god i m not going to be a tailor with you why she said like a mildly shocked mother it occurred to her that she did not need a suit and that the order might have been hard to explain to he swung down from the table i want to show you something he in the roll top desk on which kept bills buttons thread wax shells of for fancy fishing post cards of he pulled out a sheet of board and anxiously gave it to her it was a sketch for a frock it was not well drawn it was too the pillars in the back ground were but the frock had an original back very low with a central section from	42
the waist to a string of jet beads at the neck it s but how it would shock mrs wouldn t iti you must let yourself go more when you re drawing don t know if i can i ve started kind of late but listen what do you think i ve done this two weeks i ve read almost dear through a latin grammar and about twenty pages of caesar splendid you are lucky you haven t a teacher to make you artificial you re my teacher there was a dangerous edge of personality to his voice she was offended and agitated she turned her shoulder on him stared through the back window studying this typical of a typical main street block a vista hidden from casual the backs of the chief in town surrounded a neglected dirty and dismal from the front s was enough but attached to the rear was a lean to of pine lumber with a tar roof a staggering doubtful shed behind which was a heap of ashes packing boxes of straw board broken olive bottles rotten fruit and utterly vegetables orange turning black and potatoes with the rear of the bon ton store was grim with black painted iron shutters under them a pile of once glossy red shirt boxes now a from recent rain as seen from main street s meat market had a and virtuous expression with its new tile counter fresh on the floor and a hanging cut in but she now viewed a back room with a home made of yellow with black a man in an apron spotted with dry blood was out a hard of meat behind s lunch the cook in an apron which must ago have been white smoked a pipe and at the of flies in the of the block by itself was the stable for the three horses of the and beside it a pile of the rear of s bank was and back of it was a walk and a three foot square of grass but the window was barred and behind the bars she main street saw cramped over figures in books he raised his head rubbed his eyes and went back to the eternity of figures the backs of the other shops were an picture of dirty drained heaps of refuse mine is a back yard romance with a tailor she was saved from self pity as she began to think through s mind she turned to him with an indignant disgusting that this is all you have to look at he considered it outside there i don t notice much tm learning to look inside not awful easy yes i must be hurrying as she walked home without hurrying she remembered her father saying to a serious ten year old lady only a fool thinks he s superior to beautiful but only a double fool reads nothing but she was startled by the return of her father startled by a sudden conviction that in this boy she had found the gray judge who was divine love perfect understanding she it furiously denied it it it of one thing she was unhappily certain there was nothing of the beloved father image in will she wondered why she sang so often and why she found so many pleasant things seen through trees on a cool evening sunshine on brown wood morning black sloping roofs turned to plates of silver by moonlight pleasant things small friendly things and pleasant places a field of a pasture by the creek and suddenly a wealth of pleasant people was to at the dressing class mrs flattered her with questions about her health baby cook and on the war mrs seemed not to share the town s prejudice against he s a nice looking fellow we must have him go on one of our some time unexpectedly also liked him the tight little had a confused reverence for anything that seemed to him refined or clever he answered harry s that s all right now elizabeth may himself up too much but he s smart and t you forget it i was asking round trying to find out where this is and dam if he didn t tell me what s the matter with his talking so polite hell s bells harry no harm in being polite there s some regular he men that are just as polite as women near card found herself going about rejoicing how the town is she drew up with a dismayed am i falling in love with this boy that s ridiculous i m merely interested in him i like to think of helping him to succeed but as she the living room mended a collar band bathed she was herself and a young artist an nameless and building a house in the or in virginia buying a chair with his first check reading poetry together and frequently being earnest over valuable about labor tumbling out of bed early for a sunday walk and chattering where would have yawned over bread and butter by a lake was in her pictures and he adored the young artist who made castles of chairs and for him beyond these she saw the things i could do for and she admitted that did partly make up the image of her altogether perfect artist in panic she insisted on being attentive to when he wanted to be left alone to read the newspaper vi she needed new clothes had promised well have a good trip down to the cities in the fall and take plenty of time for it and you can get your new glad rags then but as she examined her wardrobe she flung her ancient black velvet frock on the floor and raged they re disgraceful everything i have is falling to pieces there was a new and a mrs it was	42
emotions saw in the fact that she talked not to one of the town but to the safe himself when glanced at again she discovered that mrs had an eye on her it was a shock to know that at last there was something which could make her afraid of mrs s what am i doing am i in love with i i want youth but i don t want i mean i want enough to break up my life i must get out of this quick she said to on their way home i want to run away for a few days wouldn t you like to down to still be pretty hot there no fun in a big city till winter what do you want to go for people to occupy my mind i want he spoke good who s been feeding you meat you got that out of one of these fool stories about wives that don t know when they re well off seriously though to cut out the i can t get away then why don t i run off by myself why t the money you understand but what about leave him with aunt it would be just for a few days i don t think much of this business of leaving around bad for em so you don t think it tell you i think we better stay put till after the war then well have a long trip no i don t think you better plan much about going away now so she was thrown at m she awoke at ebb time at three of the morning woke sharply and fully and sharply and coldly as her father pro sentence on a she gave judgment a pitiful and love affair no splendor no defiance a self deceived little woman whispering in comers with a little man no he is not he is fine it s not his fault his eyes are sweet when he looks at me sweet so sweet pitied herself that her romance should be pitiful she sighed that in this hour to this austere self it should seem then in a very great desire of rebellion and of all her the and more it is the more blame to main street it shows how much i ve been longing to escape any way out any humility so long as i can flee main street has done this to me i came here eager for ready for work and now any way out i came trusting them they beat me with rods of they t know they don t understand how their complacent is like and august sun on a wound pitiful the clean girl that used to walk so and in dark comers being sentimental and jealous at church at breakfast time her agonies were night and persisted only as a nervous iv few of the of the jolly seventeen attended the humble folk meets of the and church where the the the the butcher the and found release from loneliness but all of the smart set went to the lawn of the church and were polite to the harry gave the last lawn festival of the season a splendor of and card tables and chicken and ice cream was no longer entirely he was eating his ice cream with a of the people most in the the elders the themselves kept aloof but the others him he would never be one of the town pillars because he was not in hunting and and but he was winning approbation by his his gaiety the qualities least important in him main street when the group summoned she made several very well taken points in regard to the weather cried to come we don t belong with these old folks i want to make you with the girl she comes from she s staying with mary saw him being to the guest from saw him strolling with she burst out to mrs and seem to have quite a crush on each other mrs glanced at her curiously before she yes don t they i m mad to talk this way worried she had regained a feeling of social virtue by telling how darting her lawn looked with the when she saw that was her though he was merely about with his hands in his pockets though he did not peep at her she knew that he was calling her she away from hastened to her she nodded coolly she was proud of her coolness i ve got a wonderful chance don t know but what some ways it might be better than going east to take art says i dropped in to say to last evening and had quite a long talk with her father and he said he was for a fellow to go to work in the ur mill and learn the whole business and maybe become general manager i know something about wheat from my farming and i worked a couple of months in the flour mill at when i got sick of what do you think you said any work was artistic if it was done by an artist and flour is so important what do you think wait wait this sensitive boy would be very stamped into by and his sallow daughter but did she the plan for this reason i must be honest i mustn t with his future to please my vanity but she had no sure vision she turned on him how can i decide it s up to you do you want to become a person like or do you want to become a person like yes like me wait don t be flattering be honest this is important i know i am a person like you now i mean i want to rebel yes we re alike gravely only i m not sure i	42
can put through my schemes i really can t draw much i guess i have pretty fair taste m but since i ve known you i like to think about with dress but as a miller i d have the means books piano travel i m going to be frank and don t you realize that it isn t just because her papa needs a bright young man in the mill that is amiable to you can t you understand what shell do to you she has you when she sends you to church and makes you become respectable he glared at her i don t know i suppose so ou are thoroughly what if i am most fish out of water are don t talk like mrs how can i be anything but wandering from farm to tailor shop to books no training nothing but trying to make books talk to me probably fail i know it probably i m but i m not in about this job in the mill and i know what i want i want you please oh please i do fm not a any more i want you if i take it s to forget you please please it s you that are you talk at things and play at things but you re scared would i mind it if you and i went to poverty and i had to dig i would not but you would i think you would come to like me but you t admit it i wouldn t have said this but when you sneer at and the mill if i m not to have good things like those d you think i ll be content with trying to become a damn after you are you fair are you o i suppose not do you like me do you es no please i can t talk any more not here mrs is looking at us no nor anywhere o i am fond of you but i m afraid what of of them of my rulers my dear boy we are talking very fo i am a normal wife and a good mother and you are oh a college you do like fm going to make you love me main street she looked at him once and walked away with a serene gait that was a disordered flight grumbled on their way home you and this fellow seem quite oh we are he s interested in and i was telling him how nice she is in her room she have become a liar fm with lies and and desires i who was clear and sure she hurried into s room sat on the edge of his bed he a drowsy hand at her from the expanse of and pillows will i really think i ought to trot off to st paul or or some place i thought we settled all that few nights wait till we can have a real trip he shook himself out of his you might give me a good night kiss she did he held her lips against his for an intolerable time don t you like the old man any more he he sat up and fitted his palm about the of her waist of course i like you very much indeed even to herself it sounded flat she longed to be able to throw into her voice the passion of a light woman she patted his cheek he sighed i m sorry you re so tired seems like but of course you aren t very strong yes then you don t think you re quite sure i ought to stay here in town i told you i certainly do she crept back to her room a small figure in white i can t face will demand the right he d be obstinate and i can t even go off and earn my living again out of the habit of it he s driving me i m afraid of what he s driving me to afraid that man in there in stale air my husband could any ceremony make him my husband no i don t want to hurt him i want to love him i can t n i m thinking of am i too honest a funny honesty the of i wish i had a more mind like men i m too toward my child who needs me is an affair like a gambling debt demands honor than the legitimate debt of matrimony because it s not enforced tliat s nonsense i don t care in the least for nor for any man i want to be let alone in a woman world a world without main street or or business men or men with that sudden hungry look that glistening un expression that wives know if were here if he would just sit quiet and kind and talk i could be still i could go to sleep i am so tired if i could sleep chapter i their night came was on a country call it was cool but huddled on the porch rocking meditating rocking the house was lonely and and though she sighed ought to go in and read so many things to read ought to go in she remained suddenly was coming turning in swinging en the screen door touching her hand saw your husband driving out of town couldn t stand it well you mustn t stay more than five minutes couldn t stand not seeing you every day towards evening i had to see you pictured you so clear i ve been good though staying away haven t i and you must go on being good why must i we better not stay here on the porch the across the street are such window and mrs did not look	42
at him but she could divine his as he stumbled indoors a moment ago the night had been coldly empty now it was hot treacherous but it is women who are the calm once they the of the hunt was serene as she murmured hungry i have some little honey colored cakes you may have two and then you must home main street take me up and let me see asleep i don t believe just a glimpse well she doubtfully led the way to the nursery heads close s curls pleasant as they touched her cheek they looked in at the baby was pink with slumber he had into his pillow with such energy that it was almost him beside it was a tight in his hand a torn picture of old king said quite she in to pat the pillow as she returned to she had a friendly sense of his waiting for her they smiled at each other she did not think of the baby s father what she did think was that some one rather like an older and ought to be s father the three of them would play incredible imaginative games you ve told me about your own room let me peep in at it but you mustn t stay not a second we must go downstairs yes wiu you be good r reasonably he was pale large eyed serious you ve got to be more than reasonably good she felt sensible and superior she was energetic about pushing the door had always seemed out of place there but with the spirit of the room as he the books glanced at the prints he held out his hands he came toward her she was weak betrayed to a warm softness her head was back her eyes were closed her thoughts were but many colored she felt his kiss and on her then she knew that it was impossible she shook herself she sprang from him please she said sharply he looked at her i am fond of you she said don t spoil everything be my friend how many thousands and millions of women must have said that and now you and it doesn t spoil everything it everything dear i do think there s a tiny streak of fairy in you ml whatever you do with it perhaps i d have loved that once but i won t it s too late but i ll keep a fondness for you i will be it needn t be just a thin fondness you do need me don t you only you and my son need me i ve wanted so to be wanted once i wanted love to be given to me now i ll be content if i can give almost content we women we like to do things for men poor men we on you when you re and fuss over you and insist on you but it s so deep in us you ll be the one thing in which i haven t do something definite even if it s just selling sell beautiful from china stop you do love me i do not it s just can t you understand everything in on me so all the gaping dull people and i look for a way out please go i can t stand any more please he was gone and she was not relieved by the quiet of the house she was empty and the house was empty and she needed him she wanted to go on talking to get this out to build a sane friendship she wavered down to the living room looked out of the bay window he was not to be seen but mrs was she was walking past and in the light from the comer arc lamp she quickly the porch the windows dropped the curtain stood with movement and reflection without reasoning she i will see him again soon and make him understand we must be friends but the house is so empty it echoes so n had seemed nervous and absent minded through that supper hour two evenings after he about the living room then growled what the have you been saying to ma s book rattled what do you mean i told you that and his wife were jealous of us and here you been up to them and from what tells me ma has been going town saying you told her that you hate aunt and that you fixed up your own room because i and you said was too good for and then just recent that you were main street sore on the town because we don t all go down on our knees and beg this fellow to come take supper with us god only knows what else she says you said it not true any of it i i did like mrs and called on her and apparently she s gone and twisted everything i ve said sure of course she would didn t i tell you she would she s an old cat like her hand holding husband lord if i was sick i d rather have a faith than and she s another off the same bacon what i can t understand though she waited is i possessed you to let her pump you bright a girl as you are i don t care what you told her we all get sometimes and want to blow off steam that s natural but if you wanted to keep it dark why didn t you it in the or get a and stand on top of the hotel and or do anything besides it to i know you told me but she was so and i didn t have any woman s become so married and well next time have better sense he patted her head down behind his newspaper said	42
nothing more enemies through the windows stole on her from the hall she had no one save this kind good man he was an elder brother it was her fellow outcast to whom she wanted to run for through her storm she was to the eye sitting quietly with her fingers between the pages of a baby blue book on home but her dismay at mrs s treachery had risen to active dread what had the woman said of her and what did she know what had she seen who else would join in the hunt who else had seen her with what had she to fear from the aunt what precisely had she answered to mrs s questioning all next day she was too to stay home yet as she walked the streets on errands she was afraid of every person she met she waited for them to speak waited with she repeated i mustn t ever see again but the words did not register she had no indulgence in the sense of guilt which is to the women of main street the escape from blank at five in a chair in the living room she started at the sound of the bell some one opened the door she waited uneasy charged into the room here s the one person i can trust rejoiced was serious but affectionate she at card with oh there you are so glad t find you in sit down want to talk to you sat obedient over a large chair and launched out been hearing vague you were interested in this i knew you couldn t be guilty and i m than ever of it now here we are as blooming as a how does a respectable matron look when she feels sounded why oh it would show besides i know that you of all people are the one that can appreciate dr will what have you been hearing nothing i just heard mrs say she d seen you and walking together a lot s she looked at her nails but i suspect you do like oh i don t mean in any wrong way but you re young you don t know what an innocent liking might drift into you always pretend to be so and all but you re a baby just because you are so innocent you don t know what evil thoughts may in that fellow s brain you don t suppose could actually think about making love to me her rather cheap sport ended abruptly as cried with face what do you know about the thoughts in hearts you just play at the world you don t know what it means to suffer there are two which no human being will endure the assertion that he hasn t a sense of humor and the doubly impertinent assertion that he has never known trouble card said furiously you think i don t suffer you think i ve always had an easy no you don t i m going to tell you something never told a living soul not even ray the dam of repressed imagination which had for years which now with off at the wars she was again gave way i was i liked will terribly well one time at a party ch before he met you of course but we held hands and we main street were so happy but i didn t feel i was really suited to him i let him go please don t think i still love i see now that ray was to be my mate but because i liked him i know how sincere and pure and noble will is and his thoughts never from the path of and if i gave him to you at least you ve got to appreciate him we danced together and laughed so and i gave him up but this is my affair i m not i see the as he does because of all i ve told you maybe it s to bare my heart this way but i do it for him for him and you card understood that believed herself to have and a story of intimate love understood that in alarm she was trying to cover her shame as she struggled on liked him in the most honorable way simply can t help it if i still see things through his eyes if i gave him up i certainly am not beyond my rights in demanding that you take care to avoid even the appearance of evil and she was weeping an insignificant flushed weeping woman could not endure it she ran to kissed her forehead comforted her with a murmur of dove like sounds sought to her with worn and hastily assembled gifts of words oh i appreciate it so much and you are so fine and splendid and let me assure you there isn t a thing to what you ve heard and oh indeed i do know how sincere will is and as you say so so sincere believed that she had explained many deep and matters she came out of her like a shaking off rain drops she sat up and took advantage of her victory i don t want to rub it in but you can see for now this is all a result of your being so discontented and not the dear good people here and another thing people like you and me who want to reform things have to be particularly careful about appearances think how much better you can conventional customs if you yourself live up to them then people can t say you re attacking them to excuse your own to was given a sudden great philosophical understanding an explanation of half the cautious in history yes heard that plea it s a good one it sets aside to cool it keeps in the flock to	42
between and before the drive home without exactly describing the scene by her power of imagination the woman suggested dark country places apart from the and rude and dance steps in the bam then madness and harsh hateful conquest was too sick to interrupt it was who cried oh for god s sake quit it you any idea what happened you haven t given us a single proof yet that is anything but a rattle i haven t eh well what do you say to this i come straight out and i says to her did you or did you not taste the had and she says i think i did take one made me she said she owned up to that much so you can does that prove her a asked x don t you never use a word like that again the outraged well does it prove her to be a bad woman that she took a taste of i ve done it myself that s different not that i approve doing it what do the tell us strong drink is a but that s entirely different from a teacher drinking with one of her own pupils yes it does sound bad was silly undoubtedly but as a matter of fact she only a year or two older than and probably a good many years younger in experience of vice that s not true she is plenty ad enough to corrupt the job of was done by your town five years ago mrs did not rage in return suddenly she was hopeless her head drooped she patted her black kid gloves picked at a thread of her faded brown skirt and sighed he s a good boy and awful affectionate if you treat him some thinks he s terrible wild but that s because he s young and he s so brave and truthful why he was one of the first in town that wanted to for the war and i had to q real sharp to him to keep him from running away i didn t want him to get into no bad influences round these and then mrs rose from her recovered her pace then i go and bring into my own house a woman that s worse when all s said and done than any bad woman he could have met you say this woman is too young and inexperienced to corrupt well then she s too young and inexperienced to teach him too one or t other you can t have your cake and eat it so it don t make no difference which reason they fire her for and that s practically almost what i said to the school board have you been telling this story to the members of the school board i certainly have every one of and their wives i says to them tain t my affair to decide what you should or should not do with your teachers i says and i to dictate in any way shape manner or i just want to know i says whether you re going to go on record as keeping here in our schools among a lot of innocent boys and girls a woman that drinks curses uses bad language and does such dreadful things as i wouldn t lay tongue to but you know what i mean i says and if so i d just see to it that the town about it and that s what i professor too being and he s a righteous man not going on the sabbath like the school board members and the professor as much as admitted he was suspicious of the woman himself main street n was less shocked and much less frightened than and more articulate in his description of mrs when she had gone to and after a rather improbable question about cooking beans with bacon demanded have you heard the scandal about this miss and tm sure it s a lie oh probably is s manner indicated that the of the story was an insignificant flaw in its general crept to her room sat with hands curled tight together as she listened to a plague of voices she could hear the town with it every soul of them at new details panting to win importance by having details of their own to add how well they would make up for what they had been afraid to do by imagining it in another they who had not been entirely afraid but merely careful and all the shop s and parlor how they were this second she could hear them at it with what self they were their wit you can t tell me she ain t a gay bird i m wise and not one man in town to carry out their tradition of superb and contemptuous cursing not one to the that their rough chivalry and rugged virtues were more generous than the petty scandal picking of older lands not one dramatic to thunder with fantastic and oaths what are you at what are you at what facts have you what are these sins you condemn so much and like so well no one to say it not nor nor possibly he would uneasy protest suddenly wondered what connection her interest in had with this affair wasn t it because they had been prevented by her caste from bounding on her own trail that they were howling at m before supper she found by half a dozen calls that had fled to the house she hastened there trying not to be self conscious about the people who looked at her on the street the clerk said indifferently that he guessed miss was up in room and left to find the way she hunted along the stale smelling with their of and in white spots from water their red and yellow and	42
rows of pine doors painted a sickly blue she could not the number in the darkness at the end of a corridor she had to feel the figures on the door she was startled once by a man s voice want and when she reached the right door she stood listening she made out a long sobbing there was no answer till her third knock then an alarmed who is it go away her hatred of the town turned resolute as she pushed open the door yesterday she had seen in boots and skirt and yellow fleet and possessed now she lay across the bed in cotton and shabby very feminine she lifted her head in stupid terror her hair was in strings and her face was sallow her eyes were a from weeping i didn t i didn t was all she would say at first and she repeated it while kissed her cheek her hair bathed her forehead she rested then while looked about the room the welcome to strangers the of ho main street the property of s friend elder it of old linen and carpet and ancient tobacco smoke the bed was with a thin the sand colored walls were scratched and in every comer under everything were dust and cigar ashes on the wash stand was a and the only chair was a grim straight object of but there was an altogether splendid gilt and rose she did not try to draw out s story insisted on telling it she had gone to the party not quite liking but willing to endure him for the sake of dancing of escaping from mrs s flow of moral comments of after the first strained weeks of teaching promised to be good he was on the way out there were a few workmen torn at the dance with many young farm people half a dozen from a colony in a brush main street hidden ow of potatoes suspected thieves came m drunk they all the floor of the bam in d square dances swinging their partners laughing under the of the who and called the figures had two drinks from pocket saw him among the piled on the feed box at the far end of the bam soon after she heard a farmer declaring that some one had stolen his she with the he chuckled oh it s just a joke fm going to give it back he demanded that she take a drink unless she did he wouldn t return the just brushed my lips with it and gave it back to him moaned she sat up glared at did you ever take a drink have a few love to have one right now this contact with has about done me up could laugh then so would i i don t suppose had five drinks in my life but if i meet just one more and son well i didn t really touch that horrible raw though have loved some wine i felt so jolly the bam was almost like a stage scene the high and the dark and tin swinging and a up at the end like some mysterious kind of machine and been having lots of fun dancing with the young farmer so strong and nice and awfully intelligent but i got uneasy when i saw how was so i doubt if i touched two drops of the stuff do you suppose god b me for even wanting wine my dear mrs s god may be main street s god but all the courageous intelligent people are fighting him though he us danced again with the young farmer she forgot while she was talking with a girl who had taken the university agricultural course could not have the bottle he came staggering toward her taking time to make himself offensive to every girl on the way and to dance a she insisted on their returning went with her and he kissed her outside the door and to think i used to think it was interesting to have men kiss you at a dance she ignored the kiss in the need of getting him home before he started a fight a farmer helped her the while in the seat he awoke before they set out all the way home he alternately slept and tried to make love to her i m almost as strong as he is i managed to ke him away while i drove such a i didn t feel like a girl i felt like a no i guess i was too scared to have any feelings at all it was terribly dark i got home somehow but it was hard the time i had to get out and it was quite muddy to read a sign post i lit matches that i took from s coat pocket and he me he off the step into the mud and got up and tried to make love to me and i was scared but i hit him quite hard and got in and so he ran after the crying like a baby and i let him in again and right away again he was trying but no matter i got him home up on the porch mrs was waiting up you know it was funny all the time she was oh talking to me and was being terribly sick i just kept thinking i ve still got to drive the down to the livery stable i wonder if the livery man will be awake but i got through somehow i took the down to the stable and got to my room i locked my door but mrs kept saying things outside the door stood out there saying things about me dreadful things and rattling the and all the while i could hear in the back	42
yard being sick i don t think m ever marry any man and then today she drove me right out of the house she wouldn t listen to me all morning just to i suppose he s oyer his headache now even at breakfast he thought the whole thing was a grand joke i suppose right this minute he s going around town about his conquest you oh don t you understand i did keep him away but i don t see how i can face my school they say country towns are fine for bringing up boys in but i can t believe this is me lying here and saying this i don t believe what happened last night oh this was curious when i took off my dress last night it was a darling dress i loved it so but of course the mud had spoiled it i cried over it and no matter but my white silk stockings were all torn and the strange thing is i don t know whether i caught my legs in the when i got out to look at the sign post or whether scratched me when i was fighting him off main street iv sam was president of the school board when told him s story sam looked sympathetic and and mrs sat by oh isn t that too bad car was interrupted only when mrs begged dear oa t speak so bitter about pious people there s lots of sincere christians that are real like the ye i know unfortunately there are enough kindly le in the churches to keep them going when had finished mrs breathed girl i don t doubt her a bit and sam sure miss is young and reckless but everybody in town t ma knows what is but miss was a to go with him ut not wicked enough to pay for it with disgrace no but sam avoided clung to the horrors of the story ma her out all morning did she jumped her neck eh ma certainly is one cat yes you know how she is so vicious oh no her best style ain t her what she in our store is to come in smiling with christian fortitude and keep a busy for one hour while she out half a dozen f nails i remember one time sam cared was uneasy you ll fight won t you when mrs came to see you did she make definite charges ell yes you it say she did ut the school board won t act on them well more or less have to ut ril do what i can for the girl personally but you know what the board is there s reverend sister about half runs his church so of course he ll take her say so and as a banker he has to be all hell for morality and purity might s well admit it i m afraid there ll be a majority of the board against her not that any ci us would believe a word said not if he swore it on a f but after all this gossip miss wouldn t hardly be the party to our basket ball team when it went out of town to play other high schools would she perhaps not but couldn t some one else why that s one of the things she was hired for sam sounded stubborn do you realize that this isn t just a matter of a job and and firing that it s actually sending a splendid out with a stain on her giving all the other in the world a chance at her that s what will happen if you discharge her sam moved looked at his wife scratched his head sighed said nothing wont you fight for her on the board if you lose won t you and whoever with you make a report no reports made in a case like this our rule is to just decide the thing and announce the final decision whether it s unanimous or not rules against a girl s future dear god rules of a school board sam won t you stand by and threaten to resign from the board if they try to discharge her rather tired of so many he complained well i ll do what i can but have to wait till the board meets and do what i can together with the secret admission of course you and i know what ma is was all could get from george the reverend mr or any other member of the school board afterward she wondered whether mr could have been referring to herself when he observed there s too much license in high places in this town though and the wages of sin is or anyway bein fired the holy with which the priest said it remained in her mind she was at the hotel before eight next morning longed to go to school to face the but she was too read to her all day and by her convinced her own self that the school board would be just she was less sure of it that evening when at the motion pictures she heard mrs exclaim to mrs she may be so innocent and all and i suppose she probably is but still if she drank a whole bottle of at that dance the way everybody says she did she may have forgotten she was so innocent leaning back from her seat put in that s what i ve said all along i don t want to roast anybody but have you noticed the way she looks at men when will they have me on the q main street stopped the on their way home hated him for his of assuming that they two had a mysterious understanding without quite he seemed to wink at her as he what do you folks	42
temples neck flat cheeks on a november evening when was in the country she answered the bell and was confused to find at the door stooped imploring his hands in the pockets of his as though he had been his speech he instantly saw your husband driving away i ve got to see you i can t stand it come for a walk i le see us but they won t if we into the country ih wait for you by the take as long as you want to come in a few minutes she promised she murmured just talk to him for a quarter of an hour and come home she put on her coat and rubber considering how honest and less are how clearly their proved that she wasn t going to a lovers she found him in the shadow of the grain kicking at a rail of the side track as she came toward him she fancied that hb whole body expanded but he said nothing she he patted her sleeve she returned the pat and they crossed the railroad tracks found a road toward open country chilly night but i like this melancholy gray he said yes they passed a moaning of trees and along the wet road he tucked her hand into the side pocket of his overcoat she caught his thumb and sighing held it exactly as held hers when they went walking she it about the current maid was in for the evening but was it safe to leave the baby with her the thought was distant and began to talk slowly he made for her a picture of his work in a large tailor shop in the steam and heat and the the men in and trousers men who rushed of beer and were cynical about women who laughed at him and played jokes on him but i didn t mind because i could away from them outside i used to go to the art and the gallery and tramp clear around lake or out to the gates house and imagine it was a in italy and i lived in it i was a and collected that was after i was wounded in the only really bad time was when a tailor named found a i was trying to keep and he read it aloud in the shop it was a bad fig it he laughed i got five dollars but that s all gone now seems as main street you stand between me and the gas the long flames with edges up around the irons and making that sound all day her fingers about his as she perceived the hot low room the of pressing irons the of cloth and among his crept through the opening of her glove and smoothed her she snatched her hand away stripped off her glove tucked her hand back into his he was saying something about a wonderful person in her tranquillity she let the words blow by and only the beating wings of his voice she was conscious that he was for impressive speech say i ve written a poem about you that s nice let s hear it it don t be so casual about it can t you take me seriously my dear boy if i took you seriously i don t want us to be hurt more than more than we will be tell me the i ve never had a poem written about me i it isn t really a poem it s just some words that i love because it seems to me they catch what you are of course probably they won t seem so to anybody else but well little and tender and merry and wise with eyes that meet my eyes do you get the idea the way i do i m terribly grateful and she was grateful while she noted how bad a verse it was she was aware of the haggard beauty in the lowering night monstrous tattered clouds round a forlorn moon and rocks with inner light they were passing a grove of feeble by day but now like a menacing wall she stopped they heard the branches dripping the wet leaves sullenly on the earth waiting waiting everything is waiting she whispered she drew her hand from his pressed her clenched fingers against her lips she was lost in the i am happy so we must go home before we have time to become unhappy but can t we sit on a log for a minute and just listen no too wet but i wish we could build a fire and you could sit on my overcoat beside it fm a grand fire my cousin and me spent a week one time in a cabin way up in the big woods in the fireplace was filled with a dome of ice when we got there but we it out and the thing full of pine boughs couldn t we build a fire back here in the woods and sit by it for a she pondered half way between yielding and refusal her head ached faintly she was in everything the night his the cautious treading future was as as though she were drifting in a fourth while her mind the lights of a car round a bend in the road and they stood farther apart what ought i to do she mused i think oh i won t be robbed i am good if i m so that i can t sit by the fire with a man and talk then i d better be dead the lights of the car grew were upon them abruptly stopped from behind the of the a voice annoyed sharp there she realized that it was the irritation in his voice smoothed out having a walk they made sounds of assent pretty wet isn t it	42
better ride back jump up in front here his manner of swinging open the door was a command was conscious that was climbing in that she was apparently to sit in the back and that she had been left to open the rear door for herself instantly the wonder which had to the skies was and she was mrs w p of riding in a old car and likely to be by her husband she feared what would say to she bent toward them was observing going to have some rain before the night s over all right yes said been funny season this year anyway never saw it with such a cold october and such a nice november member we had a snow way back on october ninth but it certainly was nice up to the twenty first this month as i remember it not a of snow in november so far has there been but i shouldn t wonder if we d be having some snow most any time now main street tes good chance of it said wi i d had more time to go after the ducks this fall by what do you think sounded appealing fellow wrote me from man trap lake that he shot seven and couple of canvas back in one hour that must have been fine said was ignored but was cheerful he shouted to a farmer as he up to pass the frightened team there we are she sat back neglected frozen heroine in a drama she made a decision resolute and enduring she would tell what would she tell him she could not say that she loved did she love him but she would have it out she was not sure whether it was pity for s blindness or irritation at his assumption that he was enough to fill any woman s life which prompted her but she knew that she was out of the trap that she could be frank and she was with the adventure of it while in front he was entertaining nothing like an hour on a duck pass to make you relish your and this machine hasn t got the power of a fountain pen guess the are jam of again don t know but what maybe i ll have to put in another set of rings he stopped on main street and there that ll give you just a block to walk g night was in suspense would away he moved to the back of the car thrust in hb hand muttered good night i m glad we had our walk she pressed his hand the car was flapping on he was hidden from her by a comer store on main street did not recognize her till he drew up before the house then he condescended better jump out here and take the boat around back say see if the back door is unlocked will you she the door for him she realized she still carried the damp glove she had stripped off for she drew it on she stood in the of the living room in damp coat and muddy was as as ever her task wouldn t be anything so lively as having to endure a scolding but only an effort to his attention so that he would understand the things she had to tell him instead of interrupting her by yawning winding the clock and going up to bed s ie heard him coal into the furnace he came the kitchen but before he spoke to her he did stop in the hall did wind the clock he sauntered into the living room and his glance passed from her hat to her she could hear she could hear see taste smell touch his better take your coat off looks kind of wet yes there it was well you better he his own coat on a chair stalked to her went on with a rising voice you better cut it out now i m not going to do the outraged husband i like you and i respect you and i d probably look like a if i tried to be dramatic but i think it s about time for you and to call a halt before you get in dutch like did do you course i know all about it what d you expect in a town that s as filled with that have plenty of time to stick their noses into other folks business as this is not that they ve had the nerve to do much to m but they ve hinted around a lot and anyway i could see for myself that you liked him but of course i knew how cold you were i knew you wouldn t stand it even if did try to hold your hand or kiss you so i didn t worry but same time i hope you don t suppose this young farmer is as innocent and and all that stuff as you wait now don t get i m not knocking him he a bad sort and he s young and likes to gas about books course you like him that isn t the real rub but you just seen what this town can do once it goes and gets on you like it did with you probably think that two young folks making love are alone if anybody ever is but there s nothing in this town that you don t do in company with a whole lot of but awful interested guests don t you realize that if ma and a few others got started they d drive you up a tree and you d find yourself so well advertised as being in love with this fellow that you d have to be just to spite let me sit down was all card could say she drooped on the couch wearily without he yawned	42
your coat and and i she stripped them off he his watch chain felt the peered at the he shook out her main street in the hall hung them up with exactly his usual care he pushed a chair near to her and sat bolt up he looked like a physician about to give sound and advice before he could into his heavy discourse she desperately got in please i want you to know that i was going to tell you everything tonight well i don t suppose there s really much to tell but there is tm fond of he appeals to something in here she touched her breast and i admire him he isn t just a young farmer he s an artist wait now he s had a chance all evening to tell you what a whale of a fine fellow he is now it s my turn i can t talk artistic but do you understand my work he leaned forward thick capable hands on thick sturdy mature and slow yet no matter even if you are cold i like you better than anybody in the world one time i said that you were my soul and that still goes you re all the things that i see in a sunset when i m driving in from the country the things that i like but can t make poetry of do you realize what my job is i go round twenty four hours a day in mud and trying my to heal everybody rich or poor you that re always about how ought to rule the world instead of a bunch of spread eagle can t you see that i m all the science there is here and i can stand the cold and the roads and the lonely rides at night all i need is to have you here at home to welcome me i don t expect you to be passionate not any more i don t but i do expect you to appreciate my work i bring babies into the world and save lives and make husbands quit being mean to their wives and then you go and moon over a tailor because he can talk about how to put on a skirt hell of a thing for a man to fuss over she flew out at him you make your side clear let me give mine i admit all you say except about but is it only you and the baby that want me to back you up that things from me they re all on me the whole town i can feel their hot on my neck aunt and that horrible old uncle and and mrs and mrs and all of them and you welcome them you encourage them to drag me down into their cave i won t stand it do you hear now right now i m done and it s who gives me the courage you say he just thinks about which do not usually go on skirts by the way i tell you he thinks about god the god that mrs covers up with greasy will be a great man some day and if i could contribute one tiny bit to his success wait wait wait now hold up you re assuming that your will make good as a matter of fact at my age hell be running a one man tailor shop in some about the size of he will not that s what he s headed for now all right and he s or six and what s he done to make you think he ll ever be anything but a he has and talent wait now what has he actually done in the art line has he done one first class picture or sketch d you call it or one poem or played the piano or anything except gas about what he s going to do she looked thoughtful then it s a hundred to one shot that he never will way i understand it even these fellows that do something pretty good at home and get to go to art school there ain t more than one out of ten of em maybe one out of a hundred that ever get above grinding out a bum living about as artistic as and when it comes down to this tailor i y can t you see you that take on so about cant you see that it s just by contrast with folks like mc or that this fellow seems artistic suppose you d met up with him first in one of these new york you wouldn t notice him any more n a rabbit she huddled over folded hands like a temple virgin shivering on her knees before the thin warmth of a s ie could not answer rose quickly sat on the couch took both her hands suppose he fails as he will suppose he goes back to and you re his wife is that going to be this artistic life you ve been thinking about he s in some bum pressing all day or stooped over sewing and having to be polite to any that blows in and a dirty old suit in his face and says here you i this and be blame quick about it he won t even have enough to get him a big shop he ll along doing his own work you his wife go help him go help him in the shop and stand over a table all day pushing a big heavy iron your complexion will look fine after about fifteen years lu main street of that way won t iti and you ll be over like an old and probably you ll live in one room back of the shop and then at night oh you ll have your	42
artist hell come in of and from hard work and around that if it hadn t been for you he d of gone east and been a great artist sure and you ll be entertaining his relatives talk about uncle you ll be having some old coming in with on his boots and sitting down to supper in his and yelling at you hurry up now you make me yes and you ll have a every year at you while you press clothes and you won t love em like you do up stairs all and asleep not any more her face was on his knee he bent to kiss her neck i don t want to be unfair i guess love is a great thing all right but think it would stand much of that kind of stuff oh honey am i so bad can t you like me at all i ve i ve been so fond of you she snatched up his hand she kissed it presently she sobbed i won t ever see him again i can t now the hot living room behind the tailor shop i don t love him enough for that and you are even if i were sure of him sure he was the real thing i don t think i could actually leave you this marriage it people together it s not easy to break even when it ought to be broken and do you want to break it he lifted her carried her laid her on her bed turned to the door come kiss me she he kissed her lightly and slipped away for an hour she heard him moving about his room lighting a cigar with his on a chair she felt that he was a between her and the darkness that grew thicker as the delayed storm came down in n he was cheery and more casual than ever at breakfast all day she tried to devise a way of giving up the village central would unquestionably listen in a letter it might be found go to see him impossible that evening gave her without comment an envelope the letter was signed e v i know i can t do anything but make trouble for you i think i am going to tonight and from there as soon as i can either to new york or i will do as big things as i can i i can t write i love you too much god keep you until she heard the whistle whidi told her that the train was leaving town she kept herself from thinking from moving then it was all over she had no plan nor desire for anything when she caught looking at her over his newspaper she fled to his arms thrusting the paper aside and for the first time in years they were lovers but she knew that she still had no plan in life save always to go along the same streets past the same people to the same shops m a week after s going the maid startled her by announcing there s a mr down stairs say he to see you she was conscious of the maid s interested stare angry at this of the calm in which she had hidden she crept down peeped into the living room it was not who stood there it was a small gray bearded yellow faced man in boots canvas jacket and red he at her with shrewd red eyes you de s wife yes i m from up by i m s father he was a monkey faced little man and not gentle what you done wit my son i don t think i understand you i t ink you re going to understand before i get t where is he why really i presume that he s in you he looked through her with a such as she not have imagined only an insane of could his his he dot s a fine word i don t want no fine words and i want no more i want to know what you know main street see here mr you may stop this right now i m not one of your i don t know where your son is and there s no reason why i should know her defiance ran out in face of his immense he raised his fist worked up his anger with the gesture and sneered you dirty city women wit your fine ways and fine dresses a father come here trying to save his boy from wickedness and you call him a bully by god i don t have to take off you nor your husband i ain t one of your hired men for one time a woman like you is going to hear de about what you are and no fine city words to it really mr what you done wit him i ll tell you what you done he was a good boy even if he was a damn fool i want him back on de farm he don t make enough money and i can t get me no hired man i want to take him back on de farm and you butt in and fool wit him and make love wit him and get him to run away you are lying it s not true that it s not true and if it were you would have no right to speak like this don t talk foolish i know ain t i heard from a fellow dot live right here in town how you been acting wit de boy i know what you done walking wit him in de country hiding in de woods wit him yes and i guess you talk about religion in de woods sure women like you you re worse dan street rich women like you wit fine husbands and no decent	42
work to do and me look at my hands look how i work look at those hands but you oh god no you mustn t work you re too fine to do decent work you got to play wit young fellows younger as you are laughing and rolling around and acting like de animals you let my son alone d you hear he was shaking his fist in her face she could smell the and sweat it ain t no use to women like you get no out of you but next time i go by your husband he was marching into the hall flung herself on him her hand on his dusty shoulder you horrible old man you ve always tried to turn into a slave to your you ve sneered at him and him and probably you ve succeeded in preventing his ever rising above your heap and now because you can t drag him back you come here to vent go tell my husband go tell him and don t blame me when he you when my husband you he will kill you the man looked at her said me word and w ed out she heard the word very plainly she did not quite reach the couch her knees gave way she pitched forward she heard her mind saying you fainted this is ridiculous you re simply yourself get up but she could not move when arrived she was lying on the couch his step quickened what s happened haven t got a bit of blood in your face she clutched his arm you ve got to be sweet to me and i m going to mountains sea please argue about it because i m going quietly all right well go you and l leave the kid here with aunt now well yes just as soon as we can get away now don t talk any more just imagine you ve already started he smoothed her hair and not till after supper did he continue i meant it about but i think we better wait three weeks or so till i get hold of some young fellow released from the medical corps to take my practice and if people are you don t want to give them a chance by running away can you stand it and face em for three weeks yes she said iv people stared at her on the street aunt tried to her about s disappearance and it was who silenced the woman with a savage say are you that had anything to do with that fellow s beating it then let me tell you and you can go right out and tell the whole town that and i took took riding and he asked me about getting a better job in and i advised him to go to it getting much sugar in at the store now crossed the street to be pleasant of and new novels dragged her to the jolly seventeen there with every one rigidly listening shot at i hear has left town was amiable yes so i hear in fact he called me main street told me he had been offered a lovely job in the city so sorry he s gone he would have been valuable if we d tried to start the dramatic association again still i wouldn t be here the association myself because will is all in from work and fm thinking of taking him to you know the coast so well tell me would you start in at los or san and what are the best the jolly seventeen looked disappointed but the jolly seventeen to give advice the jolly seventeen liked to mention the expensive hotels at which they had stayed a meal counted as a stay before they could question her again escorted in with drum and die topic of had news from her husband he had been in the had been in a hospital for two weeks had been promoted to major was learning french she left with aunt but for she would have taken him she hoped that in some miraculous way yet she might find it to remain in she did not want to see again the were to occupy the house and quite the hardest thing to endure in month of waiting was the series of between and uncle in regard to the and having the furnace cleaned did inquired wish to stop in to buy new clothes ol i want to get as far away as i can as soon as i can let s wait till los sure sure just as you like cheer up we re going to have a large wide time and everything ll be different when we come back vi dusk on a snowy december afternoon the which would connect at city with the train out of st paul with a a a as it crossed the other tracks it through the factory belt gained speed could see nothing but gray fields which had closed in on her all the way from ahead was darkness for an hour in i must have been near he s still there somewhere he u be gone when i come back ill never know where he has gone as on the seat light she turned to the illustrations in a motion picture magazine chapter they for three and a half months they saw the grand the walls of fe and in a drive from el into their first foreign land they from san and la to los through towns with bell and orange groves they viewed and san and a forest of they bathed in the surf and climbed and danced they saw a game and the making of motion pictures they sent one hundred and seventeen post cards to and once on a by a sea when she was walking alone found an artist and	42
he looked up at her and said too damned wet to paint sit down and talk and so for ten minutes she lived in a romantic novel her only struggle was in not to spend all his time with the from the ten thousand other in winter is full of people from and and who having thousands of miles from their familiar villages hasten to secure an illusion of not having left them they hunt for people from their own states to stand between them and the shame of naked mountains they talk steadily in on hotel at and motion picture shows about the and crops and county politics back home discussed land prices with them he went into the merits of the several sorts of cars with them he was intimate with train and he insisted on seeing the at their in main street where sat and to go back and make some more money but gave promise of learning to play he shouted in the pool at the and he spoke of though he did nothing more radical than speak of buying evening clothes was touched by his efforts to enjoy picture galleries and the dogged way in which he accumulated dates and dimensions when they followed guides through she felt strong whenever she was restless she her thoughts by the familiar vagabond of running away from them of moving on to a new place and thus she persuaded herself that she was tranquil in march she willingly agreed with that it was time to go home she was longing for they left on april first on a day of high blue skies and and a summer sea as the train struck in among the hills she resolved tm to love the fine will quality that there is in the nobility of good sense it will be sweet to see and and the and i m going to see my all the words hell be able to say it s a new start everything will be different thus on april first among hills and the bronze of oaks while on his toes and chuckled wonder what say when he sees us three days later they reached in a storm no one knew that they were coming no one met them and because of the icy roads the only conveyance at the station was the hotel which they missed while was giving his trunk check to the station agent the only person to welcome them waited for him in the station among huddled german women with and and ragged bearded farmers in coats mute as oxen in a room thick with the steam of wet coats the of the red hot stove the of boxes which served as the afternoon light was as reluctant as a winter dawn this is a useful market an interesting post but it is not a home for me meditated the stranger suggested i d for a but it d take quite a while for it to get here let s walk they stepped from the safety of the plank platform and on their toes taking cautious strides ventured along the road the rain was turning to snow the air was stealthily cold beneath an inch of water was a of ice so that as they wavered with their they slid and almost fell the wet snow their gloves the water their ankles they inch by inch for three blocks in front of harry s sighed we better stop in here and for a machine she followed him like a wet the saw them laboring up the slippery walk up the perilous front steps and came to the door well well well back again eh say this is fine have a fine trip my you look like a rose how did you like the coast weu weu well where all did you go but as began to proclaim the list of places achieved harry interrupted with an account of how much he himself had seen two years ago when boasted e went through the mission at harry broke in that s an interesting old mission say i ll never forget that hotel there it was swell why the rooms were made just like these old and i went from to san you folks go to san no but well you ought to gone to san and then we went from there to a least they called it a got in only one considerable narrative which began say i never knew did you harry that in the district the as well as the i never thought much of the but i met a gentleman on the train it was when we were pulling out of and i was sitting on the back platform of the observation car and this man was next to me and he asked me for a light and we got to talking and come to find out he came from and when he foimd out i came from he asked me if i knew dr of red wing and of course while i ve never met him i ve heard of lots of times and seems he s this man s brother quite a coincidence weu we got to talking and we called the main street ter that was a pr ty good on that car and we had a couple bottles of ale and i happened to mention the and this man seems he s driven a lot of different kinds of cars he s got a now and he said that he d tried the and liked it first rate well when we got into a station i don t remember the name of it what the deuce was the name of that first stop we made the other side of well anyway i guess we must have stopped there to take on water and man and	42
i got out to stretch our legs and if there wasn t a drawn right up at the platform and he pointed out something i d never noticed and i was glad to learn about it seems that the gear in the is an inch longer even this chronicle of voyages harry interrupted with remarks on the advantages of the ball gear shift k gave up hope of adequate credit for being a man and to a for a ford while kissed and made sure of being the first to the latest which included seven distinct and about mrs and one considerable doubt as to the of they saw the ford making its way over the ice through the snow storm like a boat in a fog the driver stopped at a comer the car it about with c reluctance into a tree and stood on a broken wheel the refused harry s not too urgent offer to take them home in his car if i can manage to get it out of the terrible day stayed home from the store but if you say so i ll take a shot at it o i think we d better walk probably make better time and fm just crazy to see my baby with their suit cases they on their coats were soaked through card had forgotten her hopes she looked about with eyes but through rain lashes caught the glory that was back home she noted bare tree trunks black branches the brown earth between patches of decayed snow on the the vacant lots were full of tall dead weeds stripped oi summer leaves the houses were hopeless temporary chuckled by look down there jack elder must have painted his and martin has put up a new fence around his chicken yard say s a good fence di chicken ti t and dog ti t that s certainly a fence wonder how much it cost a yard yes sir they been building right along even in winter got more enterprise than these pretty good to be home eh she noted that all winter long the citizens had been throwing into their back yards to be cleaned up in ring the recent had disclosed heaps of ashes dog bones torn paint all half covered by the icy pools which filled the hollows of the yards the refuse had stained the water to vile colors of waste thin red sour yellow brown chuckled look over there on main street they got the feed store all fixed up and a new sign on it black and gold that ll improve th appearance of the block a lot she noted that the few people whom they passed wore their coats for the evil day they were in a town to think she of coming two thousand miles past and cities to get off here and to plan to stay here what conceivable reason for ing this particular place she noted a figure in a rusty coat and a cloth cap chuckled look who s coming it s sam all out for the weather the two men shook hands a dozen times and in the western fashion well well well well you old hell hound you old devil how are you anyway you old horse thief maybe it ain t good to see you again while sam nodded at her over s shoulder she was embarrassed perhaps i should never have gone away i m out of practise in lying i wish they would get it over just a block more and my baby they were home she brushed past the aunt and knelt by as he stammered o don t go away stay with me she cried o ru never leave you again he volunteered that s by he knows us just as if we d never been away said you don t any of these as bright as he is at his age when the trunk came they piled about the b little wooden men fitting one inside another the miniature and the oriental drum from san main street the blocks carved by the old frenchman in san the from san you forgive for going away will she whispered absorbed in hu asking a hundred questions about him had he had any did he still over his what about unfortunate morning incidents she viewed aunt only as a source of information and was able to her hint pointed by a shaken finger now that you ve had such a fine long trip and spent so much money and all i hope you re going to settle down and be satisfied and not does he like yet replied she was cheerful as the snow began to conceal the yards she assured herself that the streets of new york and were as ugly as in such weather she dismissed the thought but they do have charming for refuge she sang as she looked over s the grew old and dark aunt went home took the baby into her own room the maid came in complaining can t get no extra milk to make beef for supper was sleepy and he had been spoiled by even to a returned mother his and his trick of seven times her silver brush were as a background behind the noises of and the kitchen the house with a stillness from the window she heard greeting the dow as he had always done always every snowy evening guess this keep up all night she waited there they were the furnace sounds eternal removing ashes coal yes she was back nothing had changed she had never been away had she seen it had she for one minute left this sound of the small in the of the furnace but supposed that she had never had she been quite so far from going away as now when he believed she had just come	42
back she felt through the walls the spirit of small houses and righteous people at that instant she knew that in running away she had merely hidden her doubts behind the stir of travel dear god don t let me begin again she sobbed wept with her for a second she hastened down to the cellar to he was standing before the furnace however inadequate the rest of the house he had seen to it that the cellar should be large and clean the square pillars and the for coal and potatoes and trunks convenient a glow from the fell on the smooth gray floor at his feet he was whistling tenderly staring at the furnace with eyes which saw the black monster as a symbol of home and of the beloved routine to which he had returned his decently accomplished his duty of sights and performed with ness unconscious of her he stooped and peered in at the blue flames among the coals he closed the door briskly and made a whirling gesture with his right hand out of pure bliss he saw her why old lady pretty dam good to be back eh yes she lied while she not now i cant face the job of explaining now he s been so good he me and fm going to break his heart she smiled at him she his sacred cellar by throwing an empty bottle into the bin she mourned it s only the baby that holds me if died she fled upstairs in panic and made sure that nothing had happened to in these four minutes she saw a pencil mark on a window sill she had made it on a september day when she had been planning a for and and she had been hysterical with nonsense had invented mad parties for all the coming winter she glanced across the alley at the room which had occupied a rag of a gray curtain the window she tried to think of some one to whom she wanted to there was no one the sam called that evening and encouraged her to described the a dozen times they told her how glad they were to have her back it is good to be wanted she thought it will me but oh is all life always an but chapter she tried to be content which was a contradiction in terms she cleaned house all april she a for she was at red cross work she was silent when that though america hated war as much as ever we must germany and wipe out every man because it was now that there was no soldier in the german army who was not prisoners and cutting off babies hands was a nurse when mrs suddenly died of in her funeral procession were the eleven people left out of the grand army and the old men and women very old and weak who a few ago had been boys and girls of the frontier riding through the rank windy grass of this they behind a band made up of business men and high school boys who along without or ranks or leader trying to play s funeral march a shabby group of neighbors with grave eyes stumbling through the under a of faltering music was broken his was worse the rooms over the store were silent he could not do his work as at the farmers coming in with loads of wheat complained that could not read the scale that he seemed always to be watching some one back in the darkness of the he was seen slipping through talking to himself trying to avoid observation creeping at last to the once followed him and found the coarse tobacco stained old man lying on the snow of the grave his thick arms spread out across the raw mound as if to protect her from the cold her whom he had carefully covered up every night f sixty years who was alone there now for the company president let him go the company explained to had no funds tor giving she tried to have him pointed to the which since all the work was done by was the one in town the one reward for political purity but it proved that mr the former desired the at her gave a warm berth as night small boys played a good many tricks on when he fell asleep at the mill she had happiness in the return of major he was weu but still weak from having been he had been discharged and he came home as the first of the war it was that he surprised by coming that fainted when she saw him and for a night and day would not share him with the town when saw them was about everything except and never went so far from him that she could not slip her hand imder his without understanding why was troubled by this intensity and surely this was not but a brother of his this man with the tight the shoulder the trim legs in boots his face seemed different his lips more tight he was not he was major and and were grateful when he that paris wasn t half as pretty as that all of the american soldiers had been distinguished by their morality when on leave was respectful as he inquired whether the had good and what a was and a and going west in a week major was made full manager of the bon ton harry was going to devote himself to the half dozen branch stores which he was establishing at cross roads harry would be the town s rich man in the generation and major would rise with him and was though she was at having to give up most of her red cross work ray still needed nursing she explained when saw him with his uniform off in a suit	42
the rights of property citizens there s a lot of folks even right here in this fair state fairest and richest of all the glorious union that stand up on their hind legs and claim that the east and europe put it all over the golden now let me nail that lie right here and now ah ha says they so jim is claiming that is as good a place to live in as london and rome and and au the rest of the big is he how does the poor fish know says they well tell you how i know i ve seen em i ve done europe from soup to nuts they can t spring that stuff on jim and get away with it and let me tell you that the only live thing in europe is our boys that are fighting there now london i spent three days sixteen t hours a day giving london the once over and let me tell you that it s nothing but a bunch of fog and out of date buildings that no live american would stand for one minute you may not believe it but there ain t one first class in the whole works and the same thing goes for that crowd of and down east and next time you hear some from on the the rag and and trying to get your goat you tell him that no two would have new york for a gift now the point of this is i m not only that is going to be s pride the brightest ray in the glory of the north star state but also and that it is right now and still more shall be as good a place to live in and love in and bring up the little ones in and it s got as much refinement and culture as any on the wh e expanse of god s green and that goes get me that goes half an hour later moved a vote of thanks to mr the campaign was on the town sought that efficient and modem variety of fame i ch is known as the band was and provided by the commercial club with of purple and gold the amateur team hired a from des and made a of games with every town for fifty miles about the citizens accompanied it as in a special car with watch grow and with the band playing smile smile smile whether the team won or lost the shrieked boys and together put on the map brilliant record of our team then glory of glories the town put in a white way white ways were in fashion in the they were com posed of ornamented posts with clusters of high electric lights along two or three blocks on main street the confessed white way is town lit up like speech by hon james come on you twin our hat is in the ring the commercial club issued a prepared by a great and e q literary person from a agency a red headed young man who smoked in a long read the with a certain wonder she learned that and lakes were for their wooded shores and and bass not to be equalled elsewhere in the entire country that the of were models of dignity comfort and culture with and gardens known far and wide the schools and public library in its neat and building were celebrated throughout the state that the mills made the best flour in the country that the surrounding farm lands were renowned where er men ate bread and butter for their no hard wheat and cattle and that the stores in compared with and in their ot luxuries and necessities and the ever courteous attention main street of the clerks she learned in brief that this was the one logical for and houses there s where i want to go to that model town said was triumphant when the commercial club did one small shy factory which planned to make wooden wheels but when saw the she could not feel that his coming much and a year after when he failed she could not be very sorrowful retired farmers were moving into town the price of lots had increased a third but could discover no more pictures nor interesting food nor gracious voices nor amusing conversation nor minds she could she asserted endure a shabby but modest town the town shabby and she could not endure she could nurse and warm to the of sam but she could not sit honest jim had begged her in courtship days to convert the town to beauty if it was now as beautiful as mr and the said then her work was over and she could go chapter y was not so patient that he could continue to forgive s to her as he had on the venture to she tried to be but she was betrayed by her failure to glow over the believed in it demanded that she say patriotic things about the white way and the new factory he by i ve done all i could and now i expect you to play the game here you been complaining for years about us being so and now when comes along and does stir up excitement and the town like you ve always wanted somebody to why you say he s a and you won t jump on the band wagon once when announced at noon dinner what do you know about this they say there s a chance we may get another factory cream he added you might try to look interested even if you ain t the baby was by the roar ran wailing to hide his face in s lap and had to make himself humble and court both mother and child the dim injustice of not being even by	42
his son left him irritable he injured an event which did not directly touch them brought down his wrath in the early autumn news came from that the had forbidden an for the national league to speak anywhere in the the had defied the and announced that in a few days he would address a farmers political meeting that night the news ran a mob of a business men led by the the tame village street and the village faces by the light of the mob flowing between the rows of shops had taken the from his hotel ridden him on a fence rail put him on a freight train and warned him not to return the story was out in s store with sam and present that s the way to treat those fellows only they to have declared sam and and joined in a proud you bet walked out hastily observing her through supper time she knew that he was and would soon boil over when the baby was and they sat in canvas chairs on the porch he i had a you thought sam was kind of hard on that fellow they kicked out of wasn t sam rather heroic a these yes and a whole lot of the german and farmers themselves they re as the non patriotic pro german that s what they did this say anything pro german not on your life they didn t give him a his laugh was so the whole thing was and led by the precisely how do you expect these to obey your law if the officer of the law teaches them to break it is it a new kind of logic maybe it wasn t exactly regular but what s the odds they knew this fellow would try to stir up trouble whenever it main street comes right down to a question of defending and our constitutional rights it s to set aside ordinary what did he get that from she wondered as she protested see here my beloved why can t you declare war honestly you don t oppose this because you think he s but because you re afraid that the farmers he is will deprive you of the money you make out of and wheat and shops of course since we re at war with germany anything that any one of us doesn t like is pro german whether it s business competition or bad music if we were fighting england you d call the pro english when this war is over i suppose you ll be calling them red what an eternal art it is such a delightful art finding hard names for our how we do our efforts to keep them from getting the holy we want for ourselves the churches have always done it and the political and i suppose i do it when i call mrs a and mr a but you business men are going to beat all the rest of us at it with your simple hearted energetic she got so far only because was slow in shaking off respect for her now he that ll be about all from you i ve stood for your at this town and saying how y and dull it is i ve stood for your refusing to appreciate good fellows like sam i ve even stood for your our watch grow campaign but one thing i m not going to stand i m not going to stand my own wife being you can all you want to but you know dam well that these as you call em are opposed to the war and let me you right here and now and you and all these long haired men and short haired women can beef all you want to but we re going to take these fellows and if they ain t patriotic we re going to make them be patriotic and lord knows i never thought i d have to say this to my own wife but if you go defending these fellows then the same thing to you next thing i suppose you ll be about free speech free speech there s too much free speech and free gas and free beer and free love and all the rest of your damned freedom and if i had my way i d make you folks live up to the established rules of decency even if i had to take you will she was not now am i pro if i fail to throb to honest jim too let s have my whole duty as a wife he was grumbling the whole thing s right in line with the criticism you ve always been making might have known you d oppose any decent work for the town or for you re right all i ve done has been in line i don t belong to that isn t meant as a condemnation of and it may be a of me all right i don t care i don t belong here and i m going i m not asking permission any more i m simply going he do you mind telling me if it isn t too much trouble how long you re going for i don t know perhaps for a year perhaps for a lifetime i see well of course be to death to sell out my practise and go anywhere you say would you like to have me go with you to paris and study art maybe and wear and a woman s bonnet and live on no i think we can save you that trouble you don t quite understand i am going i really am and alone i ve got to find out what my work is work work sure that s the whole trouble with you haven t got enough work to	42
do if you had five no hired girl and had to help with the and separate the cream like these farmers wives then you wouldn t be so discontented i know that s what most men and women like you would say that s how they would explain all i am and all i want and i shouldn t argue with them these business men from their crushing labors of sitting in an office seven hours a day would calmly recommend that i have a dozen children as it happens i ve done that sort of thing there ve been a good many times when we hadn t a maid and i did all the and cared for and went to red cross and did it all very i m a good cook and a good and you don t dare say i m not no no you re but was i more happy when i was i was not i was just and unhappy it s work but not my work i could run an office or a library or nurse and teach children but solitary dish washing isn t to satisfy me main many other women we re going to it we re going to wash em by machinery and come out and play with men in the offices and clubs and politics you ve cleverly kept for yourselves oh we re hopeless we dissatisfied then why do you want to have us about the place to fret you so it s for your sake that i m going course a little thing like hu makes no difference ye all the difference that s why i m going to take him me suppose i refuse tou won t what the devil is it you want x h conversation no it s much more than that i think it s a greatness of life a refusal to be content with even the mud don t you know that nobody ever solved a problem by running away from it perhaps only i choose to make my own definition of running away i don t call do you realize how big a there is beyond this where you d keep me all my life it may be that some day come back but not tin i can bring something more than i have now and even if i am cowardly and run away all right call it cowardly call me anything you want to i ve been ruled too by fear of being things i m going away to be quiet and think i m i m going i have a right to my own life so have i to mine weu have a right to my life and you re it you re my life you ve made yourself so i m if i ll agree to all your notions but i will say i ve got to depend on you never thought of that did you in this off to and express yourself and free love and live your own life stuff you have a right to me if you can keep me can you he moved uneasily for a month they discussed it they hurt each other very much and sometimes they were close to weeping and invariably he used phrases about her duties and she used phrases quite as about freedom and it all her discovery that she really could get away from main street was as sweet as the discovery of love never definitely at most he agreed to a public theory that she was going to take a short trip and see what the east was like in war time she set out for washington in october just before the war ended she had determined on washington because it was less than the obvious new york because she hoped to find streets in which could play and because in the stress of war work with its demand for thousands of temporary clerks she could be into the world of offices was to go with her despite the and rather extensive comments of aunt she wondered if she might not encounter in the east but it was a chance thought soon forgotten m the last thing she saw on the station platform was faithfully waving his hand his face so full of loneliness that he could not smile but only up his lips she waved to him as long as she could and when he was lost she wanted to leap from the and run back to him she thought of a hundred she had neglected she had her freedom and it was empty the moment was not the highest of her life but the lowest and most desolate was altogether excellent for instead of slipping downward she began to climb she sighed i couldn t do this if it weren t for will s kindness his giving me money but a second after wonder how many women would always stay home if they had the money complained notice me i he was beside her on the red seat of the day coach a boy of three and a half i m tired of playing train let s play something else let s go see x h do you really like mrs es she gives me and she tells me about the dear lord you never tell me about the dear lord why don t you tell me about the dear lord says i m going to be a preacher can i be a preacher can i preach about the dear main street x h please wait till my generation has stopped before yours starts in a generation lt a ray in the of the spirit that s foolish he was a serious and literal person and rather she kissed his frown and i am running away from my husband after liking a ne er do well	42
and expressing opinions just as in a romantic story and my own son me because i given him religious instruction but the story doesn t go right fm neither groaning nor being saved i keep on running away and i enjoy it i m mad with joy over it is lost back there in the dust and and i look forward she continued it to darling do you know what mother and you are going to find beyond the blue horizon rim e re going to find with golden from whidi peep young with of and a dawn sea colored like the breast of a dove and a white and green house filled with books and silver tea sets and x oh most decidedly we ve had enough of bread and we d get sick on too many but ever so much on no at all that s foolish it is o male said ii and went to sleep on her shoulder iv the theory of the regarding s absence mrs will and son left on no on saturday last a stay of some months ia new york and washington mrs confided to ye that she will be connected with one of the war now ia the nation s ch for a brief period before returning her countless who her splendid labors with the local red cross realize how valuable she will be to any war board with which she chooses to become connected tie thus adds another shining star to its service flag and without wishing to knock any neighboring we would like to know any town of near our size in the state that has such a sterling war record another reason why you d better watch grow mr and mrs david mrs s sister mrs of and dr will drove to on tuesday for a delightful chapter she found employment in the of war risk though the with germany was signed a few weeks after her coming to washington the work of the continued she filed correspondence all day then she dictated answers to letters of inquiry it was an endurance of monotonous details yet she asserted that she had found real work she did have she discovered that in the afternoon office routine stretches to the grave she discovered that an office is as full of and as a she discovered that most of the women in the government lived dining on in their apartments but she also discovered that business women may have and as frankly as men and may in a bliss which no a free sunday it did not appear that the great world needed her inspiration but she felt that her letters her contact with the anxieties of men and women all over the country were a part of vast affairs not confined to main street and a kitchen but linked with paris she perceived that she could do office work without losing any of the feminine virtue of that cooking and cleaning when of the of an aunt take but a tenth of the time which in a it is but decent to devote to them not to have to for her thoughts to the jolly seventeen not to have to report to at the end of the day all that she had done or might do was a relief whidi made up for the office weariness she felt that she was no longer one half of a marriage but the whole of a human being main street n washington gave her all the in which she had had faith white columns seen across leafy spacious avenues daily she passed a dark square house with a hint of and a behind it and a tall second story window through which a woman was always peering the woman was mystery romance a story which told itself differently every day now she was a now the neglected wife of an it was mystery which had most lacked in where every house was open to view where every person was but too easy to meet where there were no secret gates opening upon over which one might walk by moss paths to strange high adventures in an ancient garden as she flitted up sixteenth street after a recital given late in the afternoon for the government clerks as the lamps kindled in of soft fire as the breeze flowed into the street fresh as winds and as she glanced up the elm alley of avenue as she was rested by the integrity of the temple she loved the city as she loved no one save she encountered negro turned into with orange curtains and pots of marble houses on new avenue with and and men who looked like and her days were swift and she knew that in her folly of running away she had found the courage to be wise she had a first month of hunting lodgings in the crowded city she had to in a hall room in a mansion conducted by an indignant decayed and leave to the care of a doubtful nurse but later she made a home m her first acquaintances were the members of the church a vast red brick had given her a letter to an earnest woman with eye glasses silk waist and a belief in bible classes who introduced her to the and the members of recognized in washington as she had in a and guarded main street two thirds of the had come from the church was their society and their standard they went to sunday service sunday school christian endeavor missionary lectures church precisely as they had at home they agreed that and and of the were equally wicked and to be avoided and by to church they kept their from all they welcomed asked about her husband gave her advice regarding in babies passed her the and potatoes at church and in general made her very unhappy and	42
women are given to protecting their by cynical gossip by by high church and or by a fog of had hidden in none of these from reality but she who was tender and merry had been made by even her flight had been but the temporary courage of panic the thing she gained in washington was not information about office systems and labor but renewed courage that amiable contempt called her glimpse of tasks millions of people and a score of nations reduced main street from importance to its actual she could never again be quite so awed by the power with which she herself had endowed the and and from her work and from her association with women who had organized associations in hostile cities or had defended political prisoners she caught something of an attitude saw that she had been as personal as and why she began to ask did she rage at individuals not individuals but institutions are the enemies and they most the who the most generously serve them they their tyranny under a hundred and names such as polite society the family the church sound business the party the country the superior white race and the only against them beheld is ter chapter q she had lived in washington for a year she was tired of the office it was tolerable far more tolerable than but it was not adventurous she was having tea and toast alone at a small round table on the balcony of s four d in she had felt young and dissipated had thought rather well of her black and leaf green suit but as she watched them thin of ankle soft under the chin seventeen or eighteen at most smoking with the correct and talking of bedroom and desire to run up to new york and see something she became old and rustic and plain and desirous of retreating from these hard brilliant children to a life easier and more sympathetic when they out and one child gave to a was not a defiant philosopher but a faded government clerk from she started up avenue she stopped her heart stopped coming toward her were harry and she ran to them she kissed while harry confided hadn t expected to come to washington had to go to new york for some buying didn t have your address along just got in this morning wondered how in the world we could get hold of you she was definitely sorry to hear that they were to leave at nine that evening and she clung to them as long as she could she took them to st mark s for dinner stooped her elbows on the table she heard with excitement that had the but of course he was too dam mean to die of it will wrote me that mr has gone away how did he get onr fine great loss to the town there was a real public fellow all right she discovered that she now had no opinions whatever about mr and she said will you up the town campaign harry well we ve dropped it just temporarily but sure you bet say did the write you about the luck b j had hunting ducks down in when the news had been told and their enthusiasm had she looked about and was proud to be able to point out a to explain the cleverness of the garden she fancied that a man with dinner coat and glanced at harry s highly form fitting brown suit and s tan silk frock which was doubtful at the she glared back defending her own daring the world not to appreciate them main street then waving to them she lost them down the long train shed she stood reading the list of stations beyond she saw the lakes and fields heard the of insects and the of a was greeted by sam s well well how s the nobody in washington cared enough for her to fret about her sins as sam did but that night they had at the flat a man just back from n she was on the roof with the captain at a table somewhat buying improbable soft drinks for two girls was a man with a large familiar back oh i think i know him she murmured who there oh yes you ve met him what sort of a man is he he s a good hearted idiot i rather like him and i believe that as a of he s a wonder but he s a nuisance in the section tries so hard to be useful but he doesn t know anything he doesn t know anything rather pathetic rich man around and trying to be useful do you want to speak to him no i don t think so m she was at a motion picture show the was a highly advertised and thing of cheap perfume red on the back streets of and complacent fat women it pretended to deal with the life of the leading man did a portrait which was a he also saw visions in pipe smoke and was very brave and poor and pure he had and his was strangely like an enlarged photograph prepared to leave on the screen in the of a appeared an actor called she was startled incredulous then wretched looking straight out at her wearing a and a velvet jacket was he had a pale part i ch he played neither well nor badly she could have made so much of him she did not finish her speculation she went home and read s letters they had seemed stiff and but now there strode from them a personality a personality unlike that of the young man in the velvet jacket playing a piano in a canvas room iv first came to see her in november thirteen months	42
after her arrival in washington when he announced that he was coming she was not at all sure that she wished to see him she was glad that he had made the decision she had leave from the office for two days she watched him marching from the train solid assured carrying his heavy suit case and she was he was such a person to handle they kissed each other and said at the same time you re looking fine how s the baby and you re looking awfully well dear how is everything he grumbled i don t want to butt in on any plans you ve made or your friends or anything but if you ve got time for it rd like to chase around wa and take in some and shows and stuff and forget work a while she realized in the that he was wearing a soft gray suit a soft easy hat a tie like the new got em in i hope they re the kind you like they spent half an hour at the flat with she was but he gave no sign of kissing her again as he moved about the small rooms she realized that he had had his new tan shoes polished to a there was a recent cut on his chin he must have shaved on the train just before coming into washington it was pleasant to feel how important she was how many people she recognized as she took him to the as told him he asked and she guessed how many feet it was to the top of the dome as she pointed out la and the vice and at lunch time showed herself an by leading him through the to the ant she realized that he was slightly more bald the familiar main street way in i ch his hair was parted on the left side agitated her she looked at his hands and the fact that his nails were as ill treated as ever touched her more than his pleading shoe shine you d like to down to mount this afternoon wouldn t you she said it was the one thing he had planned he was delighted that it seemed to be a perfectly well bred and thing to do me held her hand on the way and t ad her the news they were the for the new made him tired the way she always looked at the poor had been killed in a out on the coast he did not her to like him at mount he admired the library and washington s tools she knew that he would want that he would have heard of s of grant and and she took him there at dinner his hearty voice his holiday enjoyment of everything turned into in his desire to know a number of interesting matters such as i they still were married but he did not ask questions and he said nothing about her returning he cleared his throat and observed h say been trying out the old you think these are pretty good he tossed over to her thirty prints of and the country about without she was thrown into it she remembered that he had her with photographs in courtship days she made a note of his his satisfaction with the which had proved good but she forgot it in the familiar places she was seeing the among on the shore of wind miles of wheat the porch of their own house where had played main street where she knew every window and every face she handed them back with praise for his and he talked of and time dinner was over and they were of her friends at the flat but an intruder was with them sitting back persistent she could not endure it she stammered i had you check your bag at the station because i quite sure where you d stay i m dreadfully sorry we haven t room to put you up at the flat we ought to have seen about a room for you before don t you think you better call up the or the washington now he peered at her without words he asked without speech she answered whether she was also going to the or the washington but she tried to look as though she did not know that they were anything of the sort she would have hated him had he been about it but he was neither meek nor angry however impatient he may have been with her he said readily es guess i better do that excuse me a second then how about a isn t it the limit the way these skin around a comer got more nerve driving than i have and going up to your flat for a while like to meet your friends must be fine women and i might take a look and see how sleeps like to know how he breathes don t think he has but i better make sure eh he patted her shoulder at the flat they found her two and a i o had been to jail for fitted in he laughed at the girl s story of the of a he told the secretary what to do when her eyes wore tired from and the teacher asked him not as the husband of a friend but as a physician whether there was anything to this for his seemed to no more than their habitual like an older brother he kissed her good night in the midst of the company he s terribly nice said her and waited ion confidences they got none nor did her own heart she could find nothing definite to about she felt that she was no longer and forces but swept on by them he came to the flat for breakfast and washed the dishes that was her only	42
occasion for spite back home he never thought of washing dishes she took him to the obvious sights the treasury the monument the gallery the pan american building the memorial with uie beyond it and the hills and the columns of the lee mansion for all his to play there was over him a which her his eyes had depths to them now and strangeness as they walked main street square looking past the statue at the lovely tranquil of the white house he sighed i wish i d had a shot at places like this when i was m the u i had to earn part of my way and when i wasn t doing that or studying i guess i was my gang were a great for around and raising maybe if been caught early and sent to and all that would i have been what you call intelligent h my dear don t be humble you are intelligent for instance you re the most thorough doctor he was about something he wished to say he on it you did like those pictures of g p pretty well after all didn t you yes of course wouldn t be so bad to have a glimpse of the old town would it no it wouldn t just as i was terribly glad to see the but please understand me doesn t mean that i withdraw all my the fact that i might like a glimpse of old friends hasn t any particular relation to the question of whether t to have and lamp hastily no no sure not i und stand but i know it must have been pretty tiresome to have to live with anybody as perfect as i was he grinned she liked his grin he was thrilled by old negro the building to which his income tax would eventually go a rolls the supreme court room a new york theatrical manager down for the try out of a play the house where died the of italian officers the at which clerks buy their at noon the on the canal and the fact that district of cars had both district and she resolutely took him to her favorite white and green cottages and houses he admitted that and white shutters against rosy brick were more than a wooden box he volunteered i see how you mean make me think of these pictures of an old fashioned oh if you keep at it long you il have sam and me reading poetry and everything oh say d i tell you about this fierce green jack s had his machine painted vi they were at dinner he hinted before you showed me those places today rd already made up my mind that when i built the new house we used to talk about i d fix it the way you wanted it i m pretty practical about foundations and and stuff like that but i guess i t know a whole lot about architecture my dear it occurs to me with a sudden shock that i don t either ell anyway you let me plan the and the and you do the rest if you ever i mean if ever want to doubtfully that s sweet of you look here you think i m going to ask you to love me not and i m not going to ask you to come back to she it s been a whale of a fight but i guess got myself to see that you won t ever stand g p unless you want to come back to it i needn t say i m crazy to have you but i won t ask you i just want you to know how i wait for you every mail i for a letter and when i get one fm kind of scared to open it i m hoping so much that you re coming back evenings you know i didn t open the cottage down at the lake at all this past summer simply couldn t stand all the others laughing and and you not there i used to sit on the porch in town and i i couldn t get over the feeling that you d simply run up to the store and would be ri t back and till after it got dark i d catch myself watching looking up the street and you never came and the house was so empty and still that i didn t like to go in and sometimes i fell asleep there in my chair and didn t wake up till after midnight and the e oh the please get me i just want you to know how welcome be if you ever do come but i m not asking you ta re it s awfully thing i m going to be frank i t always been absolutely proper i ve always loved you main street than anything else in the world you and the kid but sometimes when you were chilly to me get lonely and sore and out and never intended she rescued him with a pitying it s all right let s forget it but he we were married you said if your husband ever did anything wrong you d want him to tell you did i i can t remember and i can t seem to think oh my dear i do know how generously you re trying to make me happy the only thing is i can t think i don t know what i think don t think here s what i want you to do get a two weeks leave from your office weather s beginning to get chilly here let s run down to and and maybe a second no don t even call it that call it a second i won t ask anything i just want the	42
chance to chase around with you i guess i never appreciated how lucky i was to have a girl with imagination and lively feet to play with so could you maybe run away and see the south with me if you wanted to you could just you could just pretend you were my sister and get an extra nurse for i ll get the best dog gone nurse in washington vn it was in the villa by the palms of the battery and the harbor that her melted when they sat on the upper balcony enchanted by the moon glitter she cried shall i go back to with you decide for me i m tired of deciding and no you ve got to do your own deciding as a matter of fact in spite of the i don t think i want you to home not yet she could only stare i want you to be satisfied when you get there i ll do everything i can to keep you happy but i ll make lots of breaks so i want you to take time and think it over she was relieved she still had a chance to seize splendid she might oh she d see europe somehow before she was but she also had a firmer respect for she had fancied that her life might make a story she knew that there was nothing heroic or obviously dramatic in it no magic of rare hours nor challenge but it seemed to her that she was of some significance because she was the ordinary life of the age made articulate and protesting it had not occurred to her that there was also a story of will into which she entered only so much as he entered into hers that he had and as intricate as her own and soft treacherous desires for sympathy thus she looking at the amazing sea holding his hand vm she was in washington was in writing as as ever about water pipes and goose hunting and mrs s she was talking at dinner to a of should she return the leader spoke wearily my dear i m perfectly selfish i can t quite the needs of your husband and it seems to me that your baby will do quite as well in the schools here as in your at home then you think i d better not go back sounded disappointed it s more difficult than that when i say that i m selfish i mean that the only thing i consider about women is whether they re likely to prove useful in building up real power for women and you shall i be frank remember when i say ou i don t mean you alone i m thinking of thousands of women who come to washington and new york and every year dissatisfied at home and seeking a sign in the heavens women of all sorts from timid mothers of fifty in cotton gloves to girls just out of who strikes in their own fathers all of you are more or less useful to me but only a few of you can take my place because i have one virtue only one i have given up father and mother and children for the love of god here s the test for you do you come to conquer the east as people say or do you come to conquer yourself it s so much more complicated than any of you know so much more complicated than i knew when i put on ground main street and started out to reform the world the final in conquering washington or conquering new york is that the must beyond all things not it must have been so easy in the good old days when authors dreamed only of selling a hundred thousand volumes and of being in big houses and even the like me had a simple hearted ambition to be elected to important offices and invited to go round but we have upset everything now the one thing that is disgraceful to any of us is obvious success the who is very popular with wealthy can be pretty sure that he has softened his philosophy to please them and the author who is making lots of money poor things i ve heard em for it to the shabby bitter i ve seen em ashamed of the sleek luggage they got from rights do you want to sacrifice yourself in such a i ere popularity makes you with the people you love and the only failure is cheap success and the only is the person who gives up all his to serve a jolly ungrateful which its nose smiled to indicate that she was indeed one who desired to sacrifice but she sighed know i m afraid i m not heroic i certainly wasn t out home why didn t i do big effective not a matter of heroism matter of endurance your is double on top of new england bluff on the surface but in its heart it still has the ideal of rock in a there s one attack you can make on it perhaps the only kind that much anywhere you can keep on looking at one thing after another in your home and church and bank and ask why it is and who first laid down the law that it had to be that way if enough of us do this in enough then we ll become civilized in merely twenty thousand years or so instead of having to wait the two hundred thousand years that my cynical friends allow easy pleasant home work for wives asking people to define their that s the most dangerous doctrine i know was meditating will go back i will go on asking questions i ve always done it and always failed at it and it s all i can do i m	42
going to ask why he s opposed to the of and ask why a always is pleased when he s called doctor and maybe ask mrs why she wears a widow s veil that looks like a dead crow the woman leader straightened and you have one thing you have a baby to that s my temptation i dream of babies or a baby and i around to see them playing the children in circle are like a and the call me was thinking in panic t to have country air i won t let him become a i can guide him away from street comer i think i can on her way home now that i ve made a precedent joined the union and gone out on one strike and learned personal i won t be so afraid will won t always be resisting my running away some day i really will go to europe with him or without him i ve lived with people who are not afraid to go to jail i could invite a miles to dinner without being afraid of the i think i could ill take back the sound of s songs and s they ll be only the against the of in the on an autumn day i can laugh now and be serene i think i can though she should return she said she would not be utterly defeated she was glad of her rebellion the was no longer empty land in the sun glare it was the living beast which she had fought and made beautiful by fighting and in the village streets were shadows of her desires and the sound of her marching and the seeds of mystery and greatness her active hatred of had run out she saw it now as a toiling new settlement with sympathy she remembered s of its citizens as a lot of pretty good folks working hard and trying to bring up their families the best they can she recalled tenderly the young awkwardness of main street and the of the little brown cottages she pitied their and had compassion for their assertion of culture even as expressed in papers for their of greatness even as in she saw main street in the dusty sunset a line of frontier with lonely main street people waiting for her solemn and lonely as an old man who has his friends she remembered that and sam had listened to her songs and she wanted to run to them and sing at last she rejoiced i ve come to a fairer attitude toward the town i can love it now she was perhaps rather proud of herself for having acquired so much she awoke at three in the morning after a dream of being tortured by and the widow been making the town a this is how people keep up the tradition of the perfect home town the hai y boyhood the brilliant college friends we forget so i ve been forgetting that main street doesn t think it s in the least lonely and pitiful it thinks it s god s own country it waiting for me it doesn t care but the next evening she again saw as her home waiting for her in the sunset round with she did not return for five months more five months crammed with greedy of sounds and colors to take back for the long still days she had spent nearly two years in washington when she departed for in june her second baby was stirring within her chapter she wondered all the way home what her sensations would be she wondered about it so much that she had every sensation she had imagined she was excited by each familiar porch each hearty well well and flattered to be for a day the most important news of the community she about making calls over their washington encounter and took to her social bosom this ancient opponent seemed likely to be her most intimate friend for though she was cordial stood back and watched for imported in the evening went to the mill the om om om of the in the electric light plant behind the mill was louder in the darkness outside sat the night he held up his hands and we ve all missed you terrible who in washington would miss her who in washington could be depended upon like when she saw him on the street smiling as always he seemed an eternal thing a part of her own self after a week she decided that she was neither glad nor sorry to be back she entered each day with the matter attitude with which e had gone to her office in washington it was her task there would be mechanical details and talk what of it the only problem which she had approached with emotion proved insignificant she had on the train worked herself up to devotion that she was willing to give up her own room to try to share all of her life with he ten minutes after she had entered the house say i ve kept your room for you like it was i ve kind of come round to your way of thinking don t see why folks need to get on each other s nerves just because they re friendly if i haven t got so i like a little privacy and things over by myself n she had left a city which sat up nights to talk of universal transition of european revolution free verse she had fancied that all the world was changing she found that it was not in the only ardent new topics were the place in where you could get at dollars a for home made beer the high cost of living the election s new car and not very novel of their problems were exactly what they had been two years ago what	42
they had been twenty years ago and what they would be for twenty years to come with the world a possible the were at the base of the mountain a does occasionally drop a river of on even the main street best of to their astonishment and considerable injury but their cousins inherit the farms and a year or two later go back to the she was unable to much over the seven new and the two which had made to seem so important her thought about them was x h yes they re all right i suppose the change ch she did heed was the of the with its cheerful brick walls broad windows for and cooking it indicated s and it stirred her to activity any activity she went to with a think i shall work for you and begin at the bottom she did she relieved the attendant at the rest room for an hour a day her only was painting the pine a black and orange rather shocking to the she talked to the and soothed their babies and was thinking of them she did not think of the u of main street as she hurried along it to the chatter of the seventeen she wore her eye glasses on the street now she was beginning to ask and if e didn t look young younger than thirty three the eye glasses pinched her nose she considered spectacles they would make her seem and hopelessly settled no she would not wear spectacles yet but she tried on a pair at s office they really were much more comfortable m dr sam and were talking in s shop i see s wife is taking a at the now said dr he the now interrupted the of sam and with his brush dripping he observed what ll she be up to next they say she used to claim this wasn t swell enough for a city girl like her and would we please tax ourselves about thirty seven point nine and fix it all up pretty with on the and on the sam blew the from his lips with small and be a good thing for most of us if we did have a smart woman to tell us how to up the town just as much to her kicking as there was to jim s about and you can bet mrs is smart even if she is glad to see her back dr hastened to play safe so was ii so was ii she s got a nice way about her and she knows a good deal about books or fiction anyway of course she s like all the rest of these women not founded not doesn t know anything about economy for every new idea that some puts out but she s a nice woman she ll probably fix up the rest room and the rest room is a fine thing brings a lot of business to town and now that mrs s been away maybe she s got over some of her fool ideas maybe she that folks simply laugh at her when she tries to tell us how to run everything sure she ll take a tumble to herself said in his lips as far as i m concerned ih say she s as nice a looking skirt as there is in town but his tone them guess she ll miss that that used to for they was a pair talking poetry and if they could of got away with it they d of been so dam sam interrupted rats they never even about making love just talking books and all that i teu you s a smart and these smart educated women all get funny ideas but they get over em after they ve had three or four you ll see her settled down one of these days and teaching sunday school and helping at and herself and not trying to butt into business and politics sure after only fifteen minutes of conference on her her son her separate bedroom her music her ancient interest in her probable salary in washington and every remark which she was known to have made since her return the supreme council decided that they would permit to live and they passed on to a consideration of s new one about the man and the old maid iv for some reason which was totally mysterious to seemed to resent her return at the jolly seven main street nervously well i suppose you found war work a good excuse to stay away and have a swell time don t you think we ought to make tell us about the officers she met in washington they and stared looked at them their curiosity seemed natural and unimportant x h yes yes indeed have to do that some day she yawned she no longer took aunt small seriously enough to e for independence she saw that aunt did not mean to intrude that she wanted to do things for au the thus hit upon the tragedy of old age which is not that it is less vigorous than youth but that it is not needed by youth that its love and so important a few years ago so gladly offered now are rejected with laughter she divined that when aunt came in with a jar of wild she was waiting in hope of being asked for the after that she could be irritated but she could not be depressed by aunt s of questioning she wasn t depressed even when she heard mrs observe ow we ve got it seems to me that the next of the country ain t so much as it is to make folks observe the sabbath and arrest these law that play and go to the and all on the lord s day only one thing bruised s vanity	42
few people asked her about washington they who had most begged for his opinions were least interested in her facts she laughed at herself when she saw that she had expected to be at once a and a returned hero she was very reasonable and merry about it and it hurt just as much as ever her baby bom in august was a girl could not decide whether she was to become a leader or marry a or both but did on and a suit with a small black hat for her year vi was at breakfast he desired to give his impressions of and f street don t make so much noise you talk too much don t peak to him that why d i t yea listen to him he has some very interesting things to what s the idea mean to say you expect me to spend all my time listening to his chatter why not for one thing he s got to learn a little discipline time for him to start getting educated learned more discipline i ve had much more education from him than he has from me what s this some new idea of raising yea got in washington perhaps did you ever realize that children are people that s all right i m not going to have him the conversation no of course we have our rights too but i m going to bring him up as a human being he has just as many thou its as we have and i want him to develop them not take s version of them that s my biggest work now ke ing myself you from him well let s not scrap about it but i m not going to have him spoiled had forgotten it in ten minutes and she f it this time vn the and the sam had driven north to a duck pass between two lakes on an autumn day of blue and copper had given her a light twenty she had a first lesson in shooting in keeping her eyes not understanding that the bead at the end of the really had something to do with pointing the gun she was radiant she almost believed sam when he insisted that it was she who had shot the at which they had fired to she sat on the bank of the lake and found rest in mrs s comments on nothing the brown dusk was still behind them were dark the acres fresh the lake was and silver the voices of the men waiting for the last flight were clear in the cool air main street mark left sang in a long drawn call three ducks were down in a swift line the guns hanged and a duck fluttered the men pushed their light boat out on the lake disappeared beyond the their cheerful voices and the slow splash and of oars came back to from the in the sky a fiery plain down to a serene harbor it dissolved the lake was white marble and was crying well old lady how about out for home supper taste pretty good eh ni sit back with she said at the car it was the first time she had called mrs by her given name the first time she had willingly sat back a woman of main street hungry it s good to be hungry she reflected as they drove away she looked across the silent fields to the west she was conscious of an unbroken sweep of land to the to a dominion ch will rise to greatness when other have grown before that time she knew a hundred generations of will and go down in tragedy devoid of and solemn the inevitable tragedy of struggle against let s all go to the tomorrow night awfully ing said well i was going to read a new book but all right let s go said vm they re too much for me sighed to been thinking about getting up an annual community day when the whole town would forget and go out and have sports and a and a dance but i y did you ever him mayor he s my idea he wants the community day but he wants to have some p give an address that s just the sort of thing i ve tried to avoid he asked and of course she agreed with him considered the matter while he wound the clock and they up stairs yes it would jar you to have in he said are you going to do much over this community don t you ever get tired of and and e q i haven t even started she led him to the door pointed at the brown head of her do you see that object on the pillow do you know it is it s a to blow up if you wise you wouldn t arrest you d arrest all children while they re asleep in their think what that baby will see and with before e dies in the year she may see an union of the i world she may see going to probably be changes all right yawned she sat on the edge of his bed while he hunted his for a which ought to be there and wasn t go on always and i am happy but this community day makes me see how thoroughly i m beaten that dam collar certainly is gone for keeps muttered and louder yes i guess you i didn t quite catch what you said dear she patted his pillows turned down his sheets as she reflected but i have won in this i ve never excused my failures by at my aspirations by pretending to have gone beyond them i do not	42
admit that main street is as beautiful as it should i do not admit that is greater or more generous than i do not admit that dish washing is enough to satisfy all women i may not have fought the good fi it but i have kept the faith sure you bet you have said well good night sort of feels to me like it might snow tomorrow have to be thinking about putting up the storm windows pretty soon say did you notice whether the girl put that back main street was s first great success in the novel he had published five novels before that one the best of these was the job in that novel he told tbe story of a village girl who comes to the big city hi her romantic illusions about it finds that they are indeed and then meets the big city on its own terms and the job was an interesting about career women they were a commonplace in fiction and it was for that reason s first book its general subject a young woman ing for a place in the ot business was in itself still but more than were certain interests with which the job is also women s rights divorce birth control and radical fiction it has been argued that movement of population the farms and the small towns to the cities at the end of the last century and the beginning of this was largely a woman s movement part of the effort at from domestic into and independence s a equipped little knight venturing to the mysterious and dreaming wild dreams of some vague r off iq is perhaps ie first major s s so different the next ot a procession of in american twentieth century fiction o this movement of w heartless into the heartless was to build around a number of than but golden in the job is the first and in a candid examination of her problem was not yet a m lace a g ance at c t mills s account of the te collar in american fiction with what completeness created the image and the pattern of life in to be followed by and all the others including s own ann and and all this we may look at as the proper background of main street where he simply his of the job a girl comes to a village and instead of trying to meet the village on its terms bo cock does that she and tries to fight those terms and is de f and so for that matter is the cook putting these two novels together side by side one must that thought that the cruel city could be made to yield while the village no sweet no friendship village would not for a minute one inch of its bleak and rigid tyranny what is it that golden is pursuing and what is it that the later heroine is pursuing himself gives us the answer in main street when he writes of that she was a woman with a working brain and no work putting her working brain to work finds herself as an identity in a society finds not only as a person but even as a force and then she finds her domestic happiness forced to put her working brain aside tries to find herself as an identity in domestic happiness can only be and loses her identity entirely together with the kind of happiness for which she had hoped today when the of women for better or worse is an accomplished fact and when uie fate of the small town has largely been settled we can perhaps read main street only as one reads a historical the story opens in about with still a student in college but in quick summary it passes over her and her year of study in and her three years as a in st paul and the story proper begins in about when she dr wiu and moves to it ends in en after her attempt to escape she into these dates whether one stretches them from to or them into the span from to in mark an era in american it is the era the manners of a closing stage of culture and in the distant cities the transition into another stage that this novel rather than any individual tragedy or comedy it was a critical f at the time mail street was published to call it the american madame and the american the comparison cannot be sustained today madame is than a study of provincial manners in a certain time and place in france that much is only the setting for a highly dramatic of human catastrophe but main street cannot be lifted out of its historic setting which is in effect the whole of it it was a period that in its years was with a peculiar c ut the of american life a period too that a native political that was intent on those for as many le as possible and throughout society at large america could be beautiful because in van s phrase america was at last coming of age the air was charged hi the early years of the second of this century with the promise of a whole new in culture was reading h g wells in the one saw the plays of and and the were talking about the discoveries of ch seemed to offer a whole new understanding of human nature every month it seemed a new advanced little magazine was being bom post painting broke on new york and then on the united states as a whole like a flood of light all over america poets were their in anticipation of a whole new era in poetry a poetry that would be daring brilliant it was the eve in pound s phrase of the american in when l married	42
dr will she had been exposed to something in every part of this what do we want she asks essentially i think you are like myself you want to go back to an age of tranquillity and charming manners you want to good taste just good taste fastidious people oh no i believe an ci us want the same things we re all together the and the women and the farmers and the negro race mid the colonies and even a few of the tables if s the same revolt in all the classes that have waited and taken advice i think perhaps we want a more conscious life we re tired of and sleeping and dying we re of seeing just a few people able to be we re tired of hearing the and priests and cautious and the husbands us be calm be patient wait we have the plans for a already made just give us a bit more time and we ll produce it trust us we re wiser you for ten thousand years they ve said that we want our now and we re going to try our hands at it all we want everything for all of us for every and every and every and every we want everything but when moved from st paul it was not on the wave of progress to new york where she could have cultivated h r interests but on an ebb flow into a of american history tiie dying american small town where her interests could only be crushed in had said that the history of a nation is only the history of its villages written large bet within little more than a by about the time of tha outbreak of the first world war s observation was no longer true the village in the united states had become an and hence a set in the of its own past while die medium sized and the great cities became the of american life and the forces in american in as van observed american literature took note of this historic shift when lee masters in his from die village published his spoon river when came to it was only fifty years old bearing still the rough of its origin such a short time before as a crossing of frontier its growth up to a certain point had been rapid and she finds that the expect it to grow still to become a city even while they suffer from a of inferiority complex when think about the cities too has hopes for it and attempts to make real there she had acquired in die city and social improvement an exciting of advanced ideas the i of fine poetry the poetry of but in every attempt she is and at last like thousands of other young americans in precisely those years and the itself comments on this shift in the population she from the village to the city where she is determined to find her career and herself her husband and trying to live an independent life with her young child she is too late and the village her back it is june in between the time of her first attempts to improve and the date of her submission to it a world war had been fought and ended with die advance of the war the older american hopes had faded and by the time that it was over much in american life seemed to many americans themselves provincial for five years the from the village had been finding more and more voices in american literature and in with the spread of a new attitude of post war in american life this particular dissatisfaction had reached its peak with die failure of c his novel timed for the american audience seized upon his first great ll it could hardly have been this extraordinary phenomenon in american and history two years later robert said if main street lives it will probably be not as a novel but as an incident in american life it was an incident in american life because it put the seal on a period in american history she had fancied that all the was changing it had main street had certain other advantages than its over its in the revolt from the most of the novels of revolt that came before it hooks by writers like gale were solemn about their subject when they were not chose to write in large part and so even his vicious characters become figures in a kind of comedy his satire is of course not distributed o seems to us today when she does not seem downright silly is spared all satire except for an occasional kindly will is not nor is nor miles nor and a number of others the satire does not begin until is looking into the window of s store and from then on it is directed only at the most complacent of taken together these provide a picture of the trap into which has fallen at the same time that they listen the pathos of her satire which is essentially an art of over since it on a few if not only on a single characteristic is inevitably in danger of overlooking the of human nature thus for example the of is as simple as a and her harry is not more than a shadow in a yet s gift extended to much more subtle portraits there is for example the school teacher who had been in love with before he knew she saw during the first five minutes in she stared at the passing at and tiie girl beside him in that fog world of of emotion had no normal jealousy but a conviction that since through she had received s love then was a part of her an self a heightened and more be loved self she was	42
put her hand to her mouth her forefinger and thumb quite painfully her lower lip and frowned and enjoyed being aloof a named a competent young man in a gray flannel shirt a rusty black bow tie and the green and purple class cap grumbled to her as they walked behind the others in the of the south st paul these college make me tired they re so top lofty they ought to of worked on the farm the way i have these workmen put it all over them i just love common workmen glowed only you don t want to forget that common workmen don t think they re common you re right i s brows lifted in the astonishment of emotion in a glory of her eyes the world peered at her he his large red fists into his pockets he jerked them out he resolutely got rid of them by his hands behind him and he i know you get people most of these co say you could do a lot for people how oh oh well you know sympathy and everything if you were say you were a lawyer s wife you d understand his i m going to be a lawyer i admit i fall down in sympathy sometimes i get so dog gone impatient with people that can t stand the you d be good for a fellow that was too serious make him more more you know s m his slightly lips his eyes were begging her j to beg him to go on she fled from the steam of his r sentiment she cried oh see those poor sheep millions and millions of them she darted on was not interesting he hadn t a white neck and he had never lived among celebrated main street she wanted just now to have a cell in a settlement house like a without the bother of a black robe and be kind and read d improve a of grateful poor the reading in led her to a book on village improvement tree planting town girls clubs it had pictures of and garden walls in france new england she had picked it up carelessly with a slight which she patted down with her finger tips as delicately as a cat she dipped into the book lounging on her window seat with her im legs crossed and her knees up under her chin she a satin pillow while she read about her was the of a college room covered window seat photographs of girls a print of the a dish and a dozen pillows embroidered or or out of place was a miniature of the dancing it was the only trace of in the room she had inherited the rest from generations of girl students it was as a part of all this that she regarded the on village improvement but she suddenly stopped she strode into the book she had fled half way it before the three o clock bell called her to the class in english history she sighed that s what do after college ill get my hands on one of these towns and make it beautiful be an inspiration i suppose i d better become a teacher then but i won t be that of a teacher i won t why should they have all the garden on long island nobody has done anything with the ugly towns here in the except hold and build to contain the books i ll make em put in a village green and darling cottages and a quaint main street thus she through the class which was a typical contest between a dreary teacher and unwilling children of twenty won by the teacher because his had to answer his questions while their treacherous he could counter by demanding have you looked tiiat up in the library well then suppose you do the history was a retired minister he was sarcastic today he begged of sporting young mr main street now charles would it t your undoubtedly fascinating pursuit of that fly if i were to ask you to tell us that you do not know an about king john he spent three delightful minutes in assuring of the fact no one exactly remembered the date of did not hear him she was the roof of a half town hall she had found one man in the village who did not appreciate her picture of winding streets and but she had assembled the town council and defeated him in though she was bom was not an intimate of the villages her father the smiling and shabby the learned and kind had come from and through all her childhood he had been a judge in which is not a town but in its garden sheltered streets and of elms is white and green new england lies between and the river hard by des where the first made the indians and the cattle once came galloping before hell for leather as she climbed along the banks of the dark river listened to its about the wide land of yellow waters and bones to the west the southern and singing and palm trees toward which it was forever mysteriously gliding and she heard again the startled bells and thick puffing of high river wrecked on sand sixty years ago along the decks she saw in tall pot hats and chiefs with scarlet blankets far off at night round the river bend by the pines and a glow on black sliding waters s family were self sufficient in their life with christmas a full of surprises and tenderness and dressing up parties spontaneous and absurd the beasts in the hearth were not the night animals who jump out of and eat little girls but beneficent and bright eyed creatures the who is and blue and lives in the and runs	42
rapidly to warm small feet the oil stove who and main street knows stories and the who will play with children before breakfast if they spring out of bed and close the window at the very first line of the song about which father sings while judge s scheme was to let the children read whatever they pleased and in his brown library absorbed and and and he gravely taught them the letters on the backs of the and when polite visitors asked about the mental progress of the little ones they were to hear the children earnestly eating a d and bis bis s mother died when she was nine her father retired from the when she was eleven and took the family to there he died two years after her sister a busy proper soul older than herself had become a stranger to her even when they lived in the same house from those early brown and silver days and from her independence of relatives retained a to be different from brisk efficient book people an instinct to observe and wonder at their bustle even when she was taking part in it but she felt as she discovered her career of town planning she was now roused to being brisk and efficient herself iv in a month s ambition had clouded her about becoming a teacher had returned she was not she worried strong enough to e the routine and she could not picture herself standing before grinning children and pretending to be wise and decisive but the desire for the creation of a beautiful town remained when she encountered an item about small town women s clubs or a photograph of a straggling main street she was for it she felt robbed of her work it was the advice of the professor of english which led her to study professional library work in a school her imagination carved and colored the new plan she saw herself persuading children to read charming fairy tales helping young men to find books on being ever so courteous to old men who were hunting for newspapers the light of the main street library an authority on books invited to dinners with poets and reading a paper to an association of distinguished scholars the last faculty reception before commencement in five days they would be in the of final the house of the president had been with palms suggestive of polite undertaking and in the library a ten foot room with a globe and the portraits of and washington the student was playing and madame butterfly was dizzy with music and the emotions of parting she saw the palms as a the pink shaded electric as an haze and the eye faculty as ol she was melancholy at sight of the girls with whom she had always intended to get acquainted and the half dozen young men who were ready to fall in love with her but it was whom she encouraged he was so much than the others he was an even warm brown like his new ready made suit with its shoulders she sat with him and with two cups of coffee and a chicken upon a pile of in the coat closet under the stairs and as the thin music in whispered i can t stand it this breaking up after four years the happiest years of life she believed it oh i know to think that in just a few days we ll be parting and we ll never see some of the bunch again got to listen to me you always duck when i try to talk seriously to you but you got to listen to me i m going to be a big lawyer maybe a judge and i need you and i d protect you his arm slid behind her shoulders the music drained her independence she said mournfully would you take care of me she touched his hand it was warm solid you bet i would we d have lord we d have bully times in where i m going to settle but i want to do with life main street what s better than making a home and bringing up some and knowing nice people it was the male reply to the restless woman thus to the young the thus the captains to and in the damp cave over bones the hairy thus protested to the woman advocate of in the dialect of college but with the voice of was s answer of course i know i pose that s so honestly i do love children but there s lots of women that can do but i well if you have got a college education you ought to use it for the world i know but you can use it just as well in the home and just think of a bunch of us going out on an some nice spring evening yes and riding in winter and going fishing the had into the soldiers chorus and she was protesting no i no you re a dear but i want to do things i don t myself but i want everything in the world maybe i can t sing or write but i know i can be an influence in library work just suppose i encouraged some boy and he became a great artist i will i will do it dear i can t settle down to nothing but dish washing two minutes later two minutes they were disturbed by an embarrassed couple also seeking the seclusion of the closet after she never saw again she wrote to him once a week for one month vi a year spent in her study of library books of reference was easy and not too she in the art in and and chamber music in the and classic dancing she almost gave up library work to become one of the	42
young women who dance in cheese cloth in the moonlight she was taken to a party with beer hair and a russian who sang the it cannot be reported that had anything significant lo main street to say to the she was awkward with them and felt ignorant and she was shocked by the free manners which she had for years desired but she heard and remembered of s the du chinese of mines christian science and fishing in she went home and that was the beginning and end of her life the second cousin of s sister s husband lived in and once invited her out to sunday dinner she walked back through and discovered new forms of architecture and remembered her desire to villages she decided that she would give up library work and by a miracle whose nature was not very clearly revealed to her turn a town into houses and the next day in library class she had to read a theme on the use of the index and she was taken so seriously in the discussion that she put off her career of town planning and in the autumn she was in the public library of st paul vn was not unhappy and she was not in the st paul library she slowly confessed that she was not visibly affecting lives she did at first put into her contact with the a which should have moved worlds but so few of these stolid worlds wanted to be moved when she was in charge of the magazine room the readers did not ask for suggestions about elevated essays they find the leather goods for last february when she was giving out books the principal was can you tell me of a good light exciting love story to read my husband s going away for a week she was fond of the other proud of their aspirations and by the chance of she read scores of books unnatural to her gay white volumes of with of foot notes filled with heaps of small dusty type for voyages to the solomon with modern american improvements upon success in the real estate business main street ii she took and was sensible about shoes and diet and never did she feel that she was living she went to dances and at the houses of college acquaintances sometimes she one sometimes in dread of life s slipping past she turned into a her tender eyes excited her throat tense as she slid down the room during her three years of library work several men showed interest in her the of a fur ing firm a teacher a newspaper and a petty railroad none of them made her more than pause in thought for months no male emerged from the mass then at the she met dr will chapter n it was a frail and blue and lonely who trotted to the flat of the johnson for sunday evening supper mrs was a neighbor and friend of s sister mr a representative of an company they made a of coffee lap and they regarded as their literary and artistic she was the one who could be depended upon to appreciate the record and the chinese lantern which mr had brought back as his present from san found the admiring and therefore admirable this september sunday evening she wore a net frock with a pale pink a nap had soothed away the faint lines of beside her eyes she was young stimulated by the coolness she flung her coat at the chair in the hall of the flat and exploded into the green living room the familiar group were trying to be she saw mr a woman teacher of in a high school a chief clerk from the great northern railway offices a young lawyer but there was also a stranger a thick tall man of thirty six or seven with stolid brown hair lips used to giving orders eyes which followed everything good and clothes which you could never quite remember mr come over here and meet dr will of he does all our examining up in that neck of the woods and they do say he s some doctor as she edged the stranger and murmured nothing in particular remembered that was a wheat town of something over three thousand people pleased to meet you stated dr his hand was strong the palm soft but the back showing golden hairs against firm red skin he looked at her as though she was an agreeable discovery main street she her hand free and fluttered i must go out to the kitchen and help mrs she did not speak to him again till after she had heated the rolls and passed the paper mr captured her with a loud oh quit now come over here and sit down and tell us how s tricks he her to a sofa with dr who was rather vague about the eyes rather drooping of shoulder as though he was wondering what he was expected to do next as their host left them awoke tells me you re a high in the public library i was surprised didn t hardly think you were old enough i thought you were a girl still in college maybe oh i m dreadfully old i expect to take to a lip stick and to find a gray hair any morning now you must be old ly too old to be my i guess thus in the of and the hours precisely thus and not in and the worn sir in the alley how do you like your work asked the doctor it s pleasant but sometimes i feel shut off from things the steel and the everlasting cards all over with red rubber don t you get sick of the city st paul why don t you like it i don t know of any view	42
than when you stand on summit avenue and look across lower town to the cliffs and the farms beyond i know but of course i ve spent nine years around the twin cities took my b a and m d over at the u and had my in a hospital in but still oh well you don t get to know folks here way you do up home i feel i ve got something to say about running but you take it in a big city of two three hundred thousand and i m just one on die dog s back and then i like country driving and the hunting in the fall do you know at all no but i hear it s a very nice town nice say honestly of course i may be prejudiced but i ve seen an awful lot of towns one time i went to atlantic city for the american medical association meeting and i spent practically a week in new york but i never saw main street a town that had such up and coming people as you know the famous he comes from born and brought up there and it s a pretty town lots of fine and and there s two of the lakes you ever saw right near town and got seven miles of walks already and building more every day course a lot of these towns still put up with plank walks but not for us you bet really why was she thinking of is going to have a great future some of the best and wheat land in the state right near there some of it selling right now at one fifty an acre and i bet it will go up to two and a quarter in ten years is do you like your profession nothing like it keeps you out and yet you have a chance to loaf in the office for a change i don t mean that way i mean it s such an opportunity for sympathy dr launched into a heavy oh these dutch farmers don t want all they need is a bath and a good dose of must have for instantly he was urging what i mean is i don t want you to think i m one of these old and but i mean so many of my are farmers that i suppose i get kind of it seems to me that a doctor could a whole community if he wanted to if he saw it he s usually the only man in the neighborhood who has any scientific training isn t he yes that s so but i guess most of us get rusty we land in a of and and legs what we need is women like you to jump on us it d be you that would the town no i couldn t too i did used to think about doing just that curiously but i seem to have drifted away from the idea oh i m a fine one to be you no you re just the one you have ideas without having lost feminine charm say don t you think there s a lot main street of these women that go out for all these movements and so on that sacrifice after his remarks upon he questioned her about herself his and the firmness of his personality enveloped her and she accepted him as one who had a right to know what she thought and wore and ate and read he was positive he had grown from a in stranger to a friend whose gossip was important news she noticed die healthy of his chest his nose which had seemed irregular and large was suddenly she was out of this serious sweetness when over to them and with horrible say what do you two think you re doing telling fortunes or making love let me warn you that the is a come on now folks shake a leg let s have some or a dance or something she did not have another word with dr until their parting been a great pleasure to meet you miss may i see you some time when i come down again i m here quite often taking to for and so on why what s your address you can ask mr next time you come down if you really want to know want to know say you wait n of the love making of and will there is nothing to be told which may not be heard on every summer evening on every shadowy block they were and mystery their speech was phrases and of poetry their were contentment or when his arm took her shoulder all the beauty of youth first discovered when it is passing and all the of a well to do unmarried man a pretty girl at the time when she is slightly weary of her employment and sees no glory ahead nor any man she is glad to serve they liked each other honestly they were both honest she was disappointed by his devotion to making money but i main street she was sure that he did not lie to and that he did keep up with the medical magazines what aroused her to something more than liking was his when they went they walked from st paul down the river to more elastic seeming in a cap and a soft youthful in a o of velvet a blue suit with an and agreeably broad turn down linen collar and frivolous ankles above shoes the high bridge crosses the mounting from low banks to a of cliffs far down beneath it on the st paul side upon mud is a wild settlement of chicken gardens and patched together from discarded sign boards sheets of iron and out of the river leaned	42
over the rail of the bridge to look down at this village in delicious fear she shrieked that she was with the height and it was an extremely human satisfaction to have a strong male snatch her back to safety instead of having a logical woman teacher or well if you re scared why don t you get away from the rail then from the cliffs across the river and looked back at st paul on its hills an imperial sweep from the dome of the cathedral to the dome of the state the river road led past rocky field slopes deep woods now with september to white and a spire among trees beneath a hill old world in its placid ease and for this fresh land the place is ancient here is the bold stone house which general the king of fur built in with plaster of river mud and ropes of twisted grass for it has an air of centuries in its solid rooms and found prints from other days which the house had seen tail coats of robin s egg blue clumsy red river carts laden with luxurious union soldiers in caps and rattling it suggested to them a common american past and it was memorable because they had discovered it together they talked more more personally as they on they crossed the river in a they climbed the hill to the round stone tower of fort they saw the of the and the and recalled the men who had come here eighty years ago main street york soldiers from the hills it s a good country and i m proud of it let s make it all that old boys dreamed about the was moved to vow let s come on come to show us make the town well make it artistic it s mighty pretty but i ll admit we aren t any too artistic probably the isn t as as all these greek temples but go to it make us change i would like to some day now you d love we ve been doing a lot with and the past few years and it s so the big trees and and the best people on earth and keen i bet but half listened to the names she could not fancy their ever becoming important to her i bet has got more money than most of the on summit avenue and miss in the high school is a wonder reads latin like i do english and sam ie man he s a not a better man in the state to go hunting with and if you want culture besides there s reverend the preacher and professor the of schools and tiie lawyer they say he writes regular poetry and and ra he s not such an awful when you get to know him and he sings swell and and there s plenty of others l an only of course none of them have your you might call it but they don t make em any more and so on come on we re ready for you to us they sat on the bank below the of the old fort hidden from observation he her shoulder with his arm relaxed after the walk a chill her throat conscious of his warmth and power she leaned gratefully against him you know i m in love with you she did not answer but she touched the back of his hand with an exploring finger you say i m so how can i help it unless i have you to stir me up i main street she did not answer she could not think you say a doctor could cure a town the way he does a person well you cure the town of whatever it if anything does and be your she did not follow his words only the of them she was shocked thrilled as he kissed her cheek and cried there s no use saying things and saying things and sa ring things don t my arms talk to you now oh please please she wondered if she ought to be angry but it was a drifting thought and she discovered that she was crying then they were sitting six inches apart pretending that they had never been nearer while she tried to be i would like to would like to see trust me here she is brought some down to show you her cheek near his sleeve she studied a dozen village pictures they were she saw only trees a porch indistinct in leafy but she exclaimed over the lakes dark water reflecting wooded a flight of ducks a in shirt sleeves and a wide straw hat holding up a string of one winter picture of the edge of lake had the air of an slide of ice snow in the of a bank the mound of a house in thin black lines arches of frosty it was an impression of cool clear vigor how d it be to there for a couple of hours or go along on a fast ice boat and back home for coffee and some hot he demanded it might fun but here s the e here s where you come in a photograph of a forest clearing pathetic new rows straggling among a clumsy log cabin with mud and with hay in front of it a woman with tight drawn hair and a baby those are the kind of folks i practise among good share of the time fine clean young hell have a farm in ten years but now i his wife on a kitchen table with my driver giving the look at that scared baby needs some woman with hands main street like yours waiting for you just look at that baby s eyes look how he s begging don t they hurt me oh	42
it would be sweet to help so sweet as his arms moved toward her she answered all her doubts with sweet so sweet chapter m under the rolling clouds of the a moving mass of steel an irritable and rattle beneath a prolonged roar tbe t of es the smell of mi ge as as a scattering of boxes on an floor the stretch of faded gold broken only by of white houses and red no the way train grumbling through climbing the giant that slopes in a thousand mile rise from hot to the it is september hot very dusty there is no attached to the train and the day of the east are replaced by free chair cars with each seat cut into two chairs the head rests covered with doubtful linen down the car is a semi of carved oak columns but the aisle is of bare blackened wood there is no porter no pillows no provision for beds but all today and all tonight they will ride in this long steel box farmers with perpetually tired wives and who seem all to be of the same age workmen going to new with and shoes they are and cramped the lines of their hands filled with they go to sleep curled in distorted attitudes heads against the window panes or propped on rolled coats on and legs thrust into the aisle they do not read apparently they do not think they wait an early wrinkled young old mother moving as though her joints were dry opens a suit case in which are seen a pair of slippers worn through at the toes a bottle of patent medicine a tin cup a paper covered book about dreams which the has her into buying she brings out a which she to a baby lying flat on a seat and wailing hopelessly most of the drop on the red main street of the seat and the woman sighs and tries to brush them away but they leap up and fall back on the a soiled man and woman and throw the on the floor a large brick colored takes off his shoes in relief and his feet in their thick gray against the seat in front of him an old woman whose mouth like a s and whose hair is no t s g much white as yellow like with bands t skull apparent between the lifts her bag opens it in it puts it under the seat and hastily it up and opens it and hides it all over again the bag is full of treasures and of memories a leather an ancient band concert scraps of ribbon lace satin in the aisle beside her is an extremely indignant in a cage facing s eats overflowing with a iron s family are with shoes bottles bundles wrapped in newspapers a sewing bag the oldest boy takes a mouth organ out of his coat pocket the tobacco off and plays marching through till every head in the car begins to ache the news butcher comes through selling bars and drops a girl child down to the and back to her seat the stiff paper envelope which she uses for cup in the aisle as she goes and on each trip she over the feet of a carpenter who look out the doors are open and from the smoking car back a visible blue line of tobacco smoke and with it a of laughter over the story which the young man in the bright blue suit and tie and light yellow shoes has just told to the man in the smell grows constantly thicker more stale n to each of the passengers his seat was his temporary home and most of the passengers were but one seat looked clean and cool in it were an obviously prosperous man and a black haired fine girl whose rested on an bag they were dr will and his bride main street they had been married at the end of a year of courtship and they were on their way to after a wedding journey in the mountains the of the way train were not altogether new to she had seen them on from st paul to but now that they had become her own people to and encourage and adorn she had an acute and uncomfortable interest in them they distressed her they were so stolid she had always maintained that there is no american and she sought now to defend her faith by seeing imagination and enterprise in the young farmers and in a man working over his order but the older people as well as had settled into submission to poverty they were she groaned isn t there any way of waking them up what would happen if they understood scientific she begged of her hand groping for his it had been a she had been frightened to discover how tumultuous a feeling could be roused in her will had been jolly competent in making camp tender and understanding through the hours when they had lain side by side in a tent pitched among pines high up on a lonely mountain spur his hand swallowed hers as he started from thoughts of the practise to which he was returning these people wake em up what for they re happy but they re so provincial no that isn t what i mean they re oh so sunk in the mud look here you want to get over your city idea that because a man s aren t pressed he s a fool these farmers are mighty keen and up and coming i know that s what hurts life seems so hard for them these lonely farms and this train oh they don t mind it besides things are changing the the rural free delivery they re bringing the farmers in closer touch with the town takes time	42
you know to change a wilderness like this was fifty years ago but already why they can hop into the ford or the and get in to the on saturday evening quicker than you could get down to em by in st paul but if it s these towns we ve been passing that the farmers main street wm to for relief from their can t you understand just look at them was amazed ever since childhood he had seen these towns from trains on this same line he why what s the matter with em good it would astonish you to know how much wheat and and com and potatoes they ship in a year but they re so ugly ill admit they aren t like but em time what s the use of giving them time unless some one has desire and training enough to plan them hundreds of trying to make attractive cars but these towns left to no that can t be true it must have taken genius to make them so oh they re not so bad was all he answered he pretended that his hand was the cat and hers the mouse for the first time she him rather than encouraged him she was staring out at a hamlet of perhaps a and fifty inhabitants at which the train was stopping a bearded german and his mouthed wife imitation leather from imder a seat and out the station agent hoisted a dead calf aboard the baggage car there were no other visible in in th quiet of the halt could hear a horse kicking his stall a carpenter a roof the business of took up one side of one block facing the railroad it was a row of one story shops covered with iron or with painted red and yellow the buildings were as ill as temporary looking as a camp street in the motion pictures the railroad station was a one room frame box a on one side and a crimson wheat on the other the with its on the ridge of a roof resembled a broad shouldered man with a small vicious pointed head the only to be seen were the red brick catholic church and at the end of main street picked at s sleeve you wouldn t call this a not so bad town would you these dutch are kind of slow still at that see that fellow coming out of the general store there getting main street into the big car i met him once he owns about half the town besides the store his name is he owns a lot of and he in farm lands good nut on him that fellow why they say he s worth three or four hundred thousand dollars got a great big yellow brick house with walks and a garden and everything other end of can t see it from here i ve gone past it when i ve driven through here yes sir then if he has all that there s no excuse whatever for this place if his three hundred thousand went back into the town where it belongs they could burn up these and build a dream village a jewel why do the farmers and the let the baron keep it i must say i don t quite get you sometimes let him they can t help themselves he s a old and probably the priest can twist him around his finger but when it comes to picking good farming land he s a regular i see he s their symbol of beauty the town him instead of buildings honestly don t know what you re driving at you re kind of played out after this long trip feel better when you get home and have a good bath and put on the blue that s some costume you witch he squeezed her arm looked at her they moved on from the desert stillness of the station the train swayed the air was thick turned her face from the window rested her head on his shoulder she was from her unhappy mood but she came out of it unwillingly and when was satisfied that he had corrected all her and had opened a magazine of stories she sat upright here she meditated is the empire of the world the northern a land of herds and exquisite lakes of new and tar paper and like red towers of clumsy speech and a hope that is boundless an empire which a quarter of the world yet its work is merely begun they are these for all their and bank accounts and and co and for all its fat richness theirs is a land what is its future she wondered a main street future of cities and factory where now are empty fields homes universal and secure or placid with sullen huts youth free to find knowledge and laughter to the lies or fat women with and chalk gorgeous in of beasts and the bloody feathers of slain birds playing bridge with pink nailed fingers women who after much expenditure of labor and bad temper still resemble their own lap dogs the ancient stale or something different in history unlike the tedious of other what future and what hope j s head ached with the riddle she saw the flat in giant patches or rolling in long the width and of it which had expanded her spirit an hour ago began to frighten her it spread out so it went on so she could never know it was in his story with the loneliness which comes most in the midst of many people she tried to forget problems to look at the the grass beside the railroad had been burnt over it was a with of weeds beyond the wire fences were of golden rod only this thin hedge shut them off from the plains wheat	42
lands of autumn a acres to a field and gray near by but in the distance like velvet stretched over dipping the long rows of marched like soldiers in worn yellow the newly fields were black fallen on the distant slope it was a martial vigorous a little harsh by kindly gardens the expanse was relieved by of oaks with patches of short wild grass and every mile or two was a chain of with the of wings across them all this working land was turned into by the light the sunshine was dizzy on open shadows from immense clouds were forever sliding across low and the sky was wider and and more resolutely blue than the sky of cities she declared it s a glorious country a land to be big in she main street then startled her by d you realize the town after the next is home m that one word home it terrified her had she really bound herself to live in this town called and this thick man beside her who dared to define her future he was a stranger she turned in her seat stared at him who was he why was he sitting with her he wasn t of her kind his neck was heavy his speech was heavy he was twelve or thirteen years older than she and about him was none of the magic of shared adventures and eagerness she could not believe that she had ever slept in his arms that was one of the dreams which you had but did not admit she told herself how good he was how and understanding she touched his ear smoothed the plane of his solid jaw and turning away again concentrated upon liking his town it wouldn t be like these barren it couldn t be why it had three thousand population that was a great many people there would be six hundred houses or more and the lakes near it would be so lovely she d seen them in the photographs they had looked charming hadn t they as the train left she began nervously to watch for the lakes the entrance to all her future life but when she discovered them to the left of the track her only impression of them was that they resembled the photographs a mile from the track a low ridge and she could see the town as a whole with a passionate jerk she pushed up the window looked out the arched fingers of her left hand trembling on the sill her right hand at her breast and she saw that was merely an of all the which they had been passing only to the eyes of a was it exceptional the huddled low wooden houses broke the plains scarcely more than would a thicket the fields swept up to it past it it was and there was no dignity in it nor any hope of greatness o y the tall red grain and a few church les rose from the mass it was a main street frontier camp it was not a place to live in not possibly not the people they d be as as their houses as flat as their fields she couldn t stay here she would have to loose from this man and flee she ed at him she was at once helpless before his mature and touched by his excitement as he sent his magazine along the aisle stooped for their bags came with flushed face and here we she smiled and looked away the train was entering town the houses on the outskirts were dusky old red with wooden or gaunt frame s like boxes or new with foundations stone now the train was passing the the grim for oil a a yard a stock yard muddy and trampled and now they were stopping at a red frame station the platform crowded with farmers and with people with dead eyes she was here she could not go on it was the end the end of the world she sat with closed eyes longing to push past hide somewhere in the train flee on toward the pacific something large arose in her soul and stop it stop being a baby she stood up quickly she said isn t it wonderful to be here at last he trusted her so she would make herself like the place and she was going to do tremendous things she followed and the ends of the two bags which he carried they were held back by the slow line of passengers she reminded herself that she was actually at dramatic moment of the bride s home coming she ought to feel exalted she felt nothing at all except irritation at their slow progress toward the door stooped to peer through the windows he look look there s a bunch come down to welcome us sam and the and and jack elder and yes sir harry and and a whole crowd i guess they see us now sure they see us see em waving she bent her head to look out at them she had main street hold of she was ready to love them but she was embarrassed by the of the cheering group from the she waved to them but she clung a second to the sleeve of the who helped her down before she had the courage to into the of hand shaking people people whom she could not tell apart she had the impression that all the men had coarse voices large damp hands bald spots and watch charms she knew that they were her their hands their their shouts their affectionate eyes overcame her she stammered thank you oh thank you one of the men was at i brought my machine down to take you home fine business sam cried and to let s jump in that big over there some boat too	42
believe me sam can show speed to any of these from only when she was in the car did she distinguish the three people who were to accompany them the owner now at the wheel was the essence of decent self satisfaction a level eyed man rugged of neck but sleek and round of face face like the back of a spoon bowl he was at her have you got us all straight yet course she has trust to get things t and get em quick i bet she could tell you every date in history boasted her husband but the man looked at her and with a certainty that he was a person whom she could trust she confessed as a matter of fact i haven t got anybody straight course you haven t child well i m sam dealer in sporting goods cream s and almost any kind of heavy you can think of you can call me sam anyway i m going to call you s you ve been and gone and married this poor fish of a bum that we keep round here smiled and wished that she called people by their given names more easily the fat lady back there beside you who is pretending that she can t hear me giving her away is mrs sam l and this hungry looking up here beside me is who keeps his store running by not filling your s right fact you might say he s the that put the in so well leave us take the main street bride home say sell you the place for three thousand better be thinking about building a new home for prettiest in g p if you asks sam drove off in the heavy traffic of three and the house free i like mr i can t call him sam m they re all so friendly she glanced at the houses tried not to see what she saw gave way in why do these stories lie so they always make the bride s home coming a bower of roses complete trust in noble lies about marriage i m not changed and this town o my god i can t go through with it this heap her husband bent over her you look like you were in a brown study scared i don t e q you to think is a paradise after st paul i don t expect you to be crazy about it at first but you ll come to like it so much life s so free here and best people on earth she whispered to him while mrs turned away i love you for understanding i m just i m over sensitive too many books it s my lack of shoulder muscles and sense give me time dear you bet all the time you want she laid the back of his hand against her cheek near him she was ready for her new home had told her that with his mother as er he had occupied an old house but nice and and well heated best furnace i could find on the market his mother had left her love and gone back to qui it would be wonderful she not to have to live in other people s houses but to make her own shrine she held his hand tightly and stared ahead as the car swung round a corner and stopped in the street before a frame house in a small lawn iv a with a of grass and mud a square brown house rather damp a narrow walk up to it sickly yellow leaves in a with dried wings of box elder seeds and of wool from the a porch with pillars of thin painted pine main street by and and of wood no to shut off the public gaze a bay window to the right of the porch window curtains of cheap lace revealing a pink marble table with a shell and a family bible find it old what do you call it mid i left it as is so you could make any changes you felt were necessary doubtful for the first time since he had come back to his own it s a real home she was moved by his humility she gaily good by to the he unlocked the door he was leaving the choice of a maid to her and there was no one in the house she while he turned the key and in it was next day before either of them remembered that in their camp they had planned that he should carry her over the sill in and front parlor she was conscious of and and but she insisted make it all jolly as she followed and the bags up to their bedroom she to herself the song of the fat little gods of the hearth i have my own home to do what i please with to do what i please with my den for me and my mate and my my own she was dose in her husband s arms she clung to him whatever of strangeness and and she might find in him none of that mattered so long as she could slip her hands beneath his coat run her fingers over the warm of the satin back of his waistcoat seem almost to creep into his body find in him strength find in the courage and kindness of her man a shelter from the world sweet so sweet she whispered chapter iv the have invited some folks to their house to meet us tonight said as he his suit case oh is nice of them you bet i told you you d like em people on earth would you mind if i down to the office for an hour just to see how things are why no of course not i know you re	42
keen to get back to work sure you don t mind not a bit out of my way let me but the advocate of freedom in marriage was as much disappointed as a drooping bride at the alacrity with which he took that freedom and escaped to the world of men s affairs she gazed about their bedroom and its full crawled her the awkward l shape of it the black bed with apples and carved on the the imitation with pink scent bottles and a pin cushion on a marble like a the plain pine and the and bowl the scent was of and and water how could people ever live with things like this she shuddered she saw the furniture as a circle of elderly judges her to death by the tottering chair choke her choke her her the old linen of the tomb she was alone in this house this strange still house among the shadows of dead thoughts and haunting i hate it i hate it she panted why did i ever she remembered that s mother had brought these family relics from the old home in qui stop it they re perfectly comfortable things they re comfortable besides oh they re horrible we ll change them right away main street then but of course he has to see how things are at the office she made a of herself with the lined silver fitted bag which had seemed so desirable a luxury in st paul was an extravagant vanity here the daring black of frail and lace was a at which the deep bed in disgust and she hurled it into a drawer hid it beneath a sensible linen she gave up she went to the window with a purely literary thought of village charm and lanes and le what she saw was the side of the seventh day church a plain wall of a sour liver color the fish pile back of the church an stable and an alley in which a ford delivery wa on had been this was the garden below her this was to be her scenery i mustn t i mustn t i m nervous this afternoon am i good lord i hope it isn t that not now how people lie how these stories lie they say the bride is always so blushing and proud and happy when she finds that out but i d hate it i d be scared to death some day but please dear lord not now bearded old men sitting and demanding that we bear children if they had to bear them i wish th did have to not now not till i ve got hold of this job of liking the ash pile out there i must shut up i m mildly insane i m going out for a walk i ll see the town by myself my first view of the empire i m going to conquer she fled from the house she stared with seriousness at every crossing every post every for leaves and to each house she devoted all her speculation what would they come to mean how would they look six months from now in which of them would she be dining which of these people whom she passed now mere arrangements of hair and clothes would turn into loved or dreaded different from all the other people in the world as she came into the small business section she a broad beamed in an coat who was bending over the apples and on a platform in front of his store would she ever talk to him what he say if main street she stopped and stated i am mrs some day i hope to confide that a heap of extremely as a doesn t me much the was mr f whose market is at the comer of main street and avenue in supposing that only she was observant was ignorant by the indifference of cities she fancied that she was slipping through the streets invisible but when she had passed mr puffed into the store and at his clerk i seen a young woman she come along the side street i bet she s new bride good nice legs but she wore a hell of a plain suit no style i wonder will she pay cash i bet she goes to s more as she does here what you done with the for n when had walked for thirty two minutes she had completely covered the town east and west north and south and she stood at the comer of main street and washington avenue and main street with its two story brick shops its story and wooden its muddy expanse from walk to walk its of and lumber was too small to her the broad straight of the streets let in the grasping on every side she realized the and the of the land the skeleton iron on the farm a few blocks away at the north end of main street was like the ribs of a dead cow she thought of the coming of the northern winter when the houses would together in terror of storms galloping out of that wild waste they were so small and weak the little brown houses they were for not homes for warm laughing people she told herself that down the street the leaves were a the were orange the oaks a solid tint of and the had been nursed with love but the thought would not hold at best the trees resembled a there was no park to rest the eyes and since not her but was the county seat there was no court house with its grounds main street she glanced through the fly windows of the most building in sight the one place which welcomed strangers and determined their opinion of the charm and luxury of the house it	42
was a tall lean shabby structure three stories of yellow wood the corners covered with pine to stone in the hotel office she could see a stretch of bare floor a line of chairs with brass between a writing desk with in mother of pearl letters upon the glass covered back the dining room beyond was a of stained table and bottles she looked no more at the house a man in shirt sleeves with pink arm wearing a linen collar but no tie yawned his way from s store across to the hotel he leaned against the wall scratched a while sighed and in a bored way with a man back in a chair a lumber wagon its long green box filled with large of wire down the block a ford in reverse sounded as though it were shaking to pieces then recovered and rattled away in the greek store was the of a and the smell of nuts there was no other nor sign of life she wanted to nm from the demanding the security of a great city her dreams of creating a beautiful town were ludicrous out from every wall she felt a forbidding spirit which she could never conquer she down the street on one side back on the other glancing into the cross streets it was a private seeing main street tour she was within ten minutes beholding not only the heart of a place called but ten thousand towns from to san s store a corner building of regular and unreal blocks of artificial stone inside the store a greasy marble fountain with an electric lamp of red and green and yellow shade over heaps of and and of soap shelves of soap rings garden seeds and patent in yellow for consumption for women s diseases notorious of and main street in the very shop to which her husband sent for the filling of from a second story window the sign w p surgeon gilt on black sand a small wooden motion picture called the palace announcing a called in love s in the display window black and on which a cat was sleeping shelves lined with red paper which was now faded and torn and spotted flat against the wall of the second story the signs of the knights of the the the s meat market a of blood a shop with looking wrist watches for women in front of it at the a huge wooden clock which did not go a fly saloon with a brilliant gold and sign across the front other down the block from them a of stale beer and thick voices german or out dirty songs vice gone feeble and and dull the delicacy of a camp its vigor in front of the sitting on the seats of waiting for their husbands to become drunk and ready to start home a tobacco shop called the smoke house filled with young men shaking for of magazines and pictures of fat in striped bathing suits a clothing store with a display of ox blood shade with bull dog toes suits which looked worn and while they were still new draped on like with painted cheeks the bon ton store the largest shop in town the first story front of clear glass the plates cleverly bound at the edges with brass the second story of pleasant brick one window of excellent clothes for men with of which showed on a ground and an obvious notion of neatness and service she had met a at the station harry an active person of thirty five he seemed great to her now and very like a saint his shop was main street s general store frequented by farmers in the shallow dark window space heaps of badly woven canvas shoes designed for women with ankles steel and red glass buttons upon cards with broken edges a blanket a granite ware fr pan on a sun faded sam s store an air of frankly enterprise guns and and barrels of nails and beautiful shiny butcher knives s house furnishing a vista of heavy oak with leather seats asleep in a dismal row s lunch thick cups on the wet counter an of and the smoke of hot in the doorway a young man audibly a the of the of cream and potatoes the sour smell of a the ford and the competent brick and buildings opposite each other old and new cars on blackened floors tire the roaring of a tested a which beat at the nerves surly young men in union the most energetic and vital places in town a large for agricultural implements an impressive of green and gold wheels of shafts and sulky seats belonging to machinery of which knew nothing breaking a feed store its windows with the dust of a patent medicine advertisement painted on its roof ye art mrs mary christian science library open daily free a touching at beauty a one room of boards recently covered with rough a show window delicately rich in error starting out to imitate tree trunks but off into of gilt an ash tray greetings from a christian science magazine stamped sofa cushion a large ribbon tied to a small the correct of silk lying on the pillow inside the shop a glimpse of bad prints of bad and famous pictures shelves of records and wooden toys main street and in the midst an anxious small woman sitting in a rocking chair a shop and pool room a man in shirt sleeves the proprietor a man who had a large adam s apple s tailor shop on a side street off main a building a fashion plate showing human in garments which looked as hard as plate on another side street a raw red brick catholic church with a yellow door the post of ce merely a of glass	42
and brass shutting off the rear of a room which must once have been a shop a writing shelf against a wall rubbed black and scattered with official notices and army the damp yellow brick in its grounds the state bank wood the farmers national bank an temple of marble pure exquisite solitary a brass plate with t a score of similar shops and behind them and mixed with them the houses meek cottages or large comfortable soundly uninteresting of prosperity in all the town not one building save the bank which gave pleasure to eyes not a dozen buildings which suggested that in the fifty years of s existence the citizens had realized that it was either desirable or possible to make this their common home amusing or attractive it was not only the and the rigid which overwhelmed her it was the the of the buildings their faded unpleasant colors the street was with poles poles for cars boxes of goods each man had built with the most disregard of all the others between a large new block of two story brick shops on one side and the fire brick on the other side was a one story cottage turned into a shop the white temple of the farmers bank was back by a of glaring yellow brick one store building had a iron the building beside it was crowned with and of brick with blocks of red main street she escaped from main street fled home she t have cared she insisted if the le had been comely she had noted a young man before a shop one hand holding the cord of an a middle aged man who had a way of staring at women as though he had been married too long and too an old farmer solid wholesome but not clean his face uke a fresh from the earth none of them had shaved for three days if they can t build out here on the surely there s nothing to prevent their buying safety she raged she fought herself i must be wrong people do live here it can t be as ugly as as i know it is i must be wrong but i can t do it i can t go through with it she came home too seriously worried for and when she found waiting for her and have a walk well like the town great and trees eh she was able to say with a self maturity new to her it s very interesting in the train which brought to also brought miss miss was a corn colored laughing young woman and she was bored by farm work she desired the of city life and the way to enjoy city life was she had decided to go get a as hired girl in she her from the station to her cousin maid of all work in the residence of mrs veil so you come to town said ay get a said veil you got a now veil i m to see you how much you a sex dollar there ain t nobody pay dr i t ink he marry a girl from de cities maybe she pay veil you go take a said main street so it chanced that and were main street at the same time had never before been in a town larger than crossing which has sixty seven inhabitants as she marched up the street she was meditating that it didn t hardly seem like it was possible there could be so many folks all in one place at the same time my it would take years to get acquainted with them all and swell people tool a fine big gentleman in a new shirt with a diamond and not no washed out blue working shirt a lovely lady in a dress but it must be an hard dress to and the stores not just three of them like there were at crossing but more than four whole blocks the bon ton store big as four it would simply scare a person to go in there with seven or eight all looking at you and the men s suits on figures just like human and s like home lots of and in there and a card of buttons like a store with a fountain that was just huge awful long and all lovely marble and on it there was a great big lamp with the biggest shade you ever saw all different kinds colored glass together and the they were silver and they came right out of the bottom of the behind the fountain there were glass shelves and bottles of new kinds of soft drinks that nobody ever heard of suppose a took you there a hotel awful high higher than s new red bam three stories one right on top of another you had to stick your head back to look clear up to the top there was a swell man in there probably been to lots of times oh the people to know here there was a lady going by you wouldn t hardly say she was any older than herself she wore a new gray suit and black she almost looked like she was looking over the town too but you couldn t tell what she thought would like to be that way kind of quiet so nobody would get fresh kind of oh elegant a church here in the city there d be lovely sermons and church twice on sunday every sunday and a show main street a regular just for with the sign change of bill every evening pictures every evening there were in crossing but only once every two weeks and it took the an hour to drive in papa was such a he wouldn t get a ford but here she could put on her hat any evening and	42
in three minutes walk be to the and see lovely fellows in dress suits and bill and everything how could they have so many stores why there was one just for tobacco alone and one a lovely one the art it was for pictures and and stuff with oh the made so it looked just like a tree trunk stood on the comer of main street and washington avenue the roar of the city began to frighten her there were five on the street all at the same time and one of em was a great big car that must of cost two thousand dollars and the was starting for a train with five fellows and a man was up red bills with lovely pictures of washing machines on them and the was laying out and wrist watches and everything on real velvet what did she care if she got six dollars a week or two it was worth while working for nothing to be allowed to stay here and think how it would be in the evening all lighted up and not with no lamps but with and maybe a gentleman friend taking you to the and buying you a ice cream back veil you it said ay it ay t ink maybe ay stay here said iv the recently built house of sam in which was given the party to welcome was one of the largest in it had a clean sweep of a solid a small tower and a large porch inside it was as shiny as hard and as cheerful as a new oak upright piano looked at sam as he rolled to the door and shouted welcome little lady the keys of the city are beyond him in the and the living room sitting in main street a vast circle as though they were attending a funeral she saw the guests they were waiting they were waiting for her the determination to be all one pretty of appreciation away she begged of sam i don t dare face them they expect so they swallow me in one like that why sister they re going to love you same as i would if i didn t think the here would beat me up b but i don t dare faces to the right of me faces in front of me and wonder she sounded hysterical to herself she fancied that to sam she sounded insane but he chuckled now you just imder sam s wing and if anybody at you too long i ll em off here we go watch my smoke the ladies delight and the terror his arm about her he led her in and ladies and the bride we won t introduce her round yet because shell never get bum names straight anyway now bust up this star chamber they politely but they did not move from the social security of their circle and they did not cease staring had given energy to dressing for the event her hair was low on her forehead a parting and a now she wished that she had piled it high her frock was an slip of lawn with a wide gold and a low square neck which gave a suggestion of throat and shoulders but as they looked her over she was certain that it was all wrong she wished alternately that she had worn a hi dress and that she had dared to shock them with a violent brick red which she had bought in she was led about the circle her voice mechanically produced safe remarks oh i m sure i m going to like it here ever so much and yes we did have the best time in mountains and yes i lived in st paul several years p no i don t remember meeting him but i m pretty sure i ve heard of him took her aside and whispered now i ll introduce you to them one at a time tell me about them first well the nice looking couple over there are harry hay main street dock and his wife harry s owns most of the bon ton but it s harry who runs it and gives it the he s a next to him is the you met him this afternoon mighty good duck shot the tall beyond him is jack elder elder owns the and the house and quite a share in the farmers national bank him and his wife are good sports him and sam and i go together a lot the old cheese there is the richest man in town next to him is the really a tailor sure why not maybe we re slow but we are i go hunting with same as i do with jack elder i m glad i ve never met a tailor it must be charming to meet one and not have to think about what you owe him and do you would you go hunting with your too no but no use running this thing into the ground besides i ve known for years and besides he s a mighty good shot and that s the way it is see next to is great fellow for hell talk your arm off about religion or politics or books or anything gazed with a polite to interest at mr a tan person with a wide mouth oh i know he s the furniture store man she was much pleased with herself and he s the you ll like him come shake hands with him oh no no i he doesn t he doesn t do the and all that himself i couldn t shake hands with an why not you d be proud to shake hands with a great surgeon just after he d been carving up people s she sought to regain her afternoon	42
doctor dr s rival gasped at this insult to professional and he took an second before he recovered his social manner i ll tell you mrs he smiled at to imply that whatever he might say in the stress of being witty was not to count against him in the medical warfare there s some people in town that say the is a fair to and writer but let me whisper this to you but for heaven s sake don t tell him i said so don t you ever go to him for anything more serious than a of the left ear or a of the no one save knew exactly what this meant but they laughed and sam s party assumed a glittering main street yellow color of and champagne and and crystal and sporting saw that george and the mr and mrs were not yet they looked as though they wondered whether they ought to look as though they proved she concentrated on them but i know whom i wouldn t have dared to go to with mr i m sure he s a regular when we were introduced he held my hand and squeezed it the entire company applauded mr was he had been called many things loan but he had never before been called a he is wicked isn t he mrs don t you have to lock him up oh no but maybe i better attempted mrs a tint on her pallid face for fifteen minutes kept it she asserted that she was going to stage a musical comedy that she preferred to that she hoped dr would never lose his ability to make love to charming women and that she had a pair of gold stockings they for more but she could not keep it up she retired to a chair behind sam s bulk the smile wrinkles solemnly out in the faces of all the other in having a party and again they stood about hoping but not expecting to be amused listened discovered that conversation did not exist in even at this which brought out the young smart set the hunting squire set the respectable intellectual set and the solid financial set they sat up with gaiety as with a corpse talked a good deal in her rattling voice but it was invariably of the that was going to send for a pair of patent leather shoes with gray tops the of the state of s and the of jim in painting his fence salmon pink sam had been talking to about cars but he felt his duties as host while he his brows up and down he interrupted himself must stir em he worried at his wife don t you think i better main street stir em up he shouldered into the of the room and cried let s have some folks yes let s shrieked say give us that about the catching a hen you bet that s a do that cheered mr obliged all the guests moved their lips in anticipation of being called on for their own come on and old sweetheart of mine for us demanded sam miss the daughter of the bank scratched her dry palms and blushed oh you don t to hear that old thing again sure we do you bet asserted sam my voice is in terrible shape tonight tut come on sam loudly explained to is our at she s had professional training she studied singing and and dramatic art and for a year in miss was as to an old t heart of mine she gave a peculiarly poem ing the value of smiles there were four other one one irish one and s of mark s funeral during the winter was to hear s seven times an old sweetheart of mine nine times the story and the funeral twice but now she was ardent and because she did so want to be happy and simple hearted she was as disappointed as the others when the were finished and the party instantly sank back into they gave up trying to be they began to talk naturally as they did at their shops and homes the men and women divided as they had been tending to do all evening was deserted by the men left to a group of who steadily of children sickness and their own shop talk she was she re main street visions of herself as a smart married woman in a drawing room with clever men her was relieved by speculation as to what the men were discussing in the corner between the piano and the did they rise from these to a larger world of and affairs she made her best to mrs she i won t have my husband leaving me so i m going over and pull the wretch s ears she rose with a bow she was self absorbed and self because she had attained that quality of she proudly dipped across the room and to the interest and of all sat on the arm of s chair he was with sam of the mill harry and president of the bank was a he had come to in he was a d bird of p thin nose mouth thick brows port wine cheeks of white hair contemptuous eyes he was not h q in the social changes of thirty years three ago dr the lawyer the and himself had been the that was as it should be the fine arts medicine religion and recognized as aristocratic four with but ruling the and and and who had ventured to follow them but was old almost retired had lost much of his practice to reverend not the reverend was dead and nobody was impressed in this rotten age of by the which still drove the town was as as and owned stores the social leaders were common merchants selling	42
because i had to stop and fill the and we ran along just keeping up a good steady gait mr did finally for reasons and purposes admitted justified attain to new once only once the presence of the alien was recognized leaned over and said say have you been reading this two out in tales the fellow that wrote it certainly can the others tried to look literary harry offered is a great hand for reading high class stuff like mid the by this and of reckless books but me he glanced about as one convinced that no other hero had ever been in so strange a plight i m so busy i don t have much time to read i never read anything i can t check against said sam main street thus ended the literary portion of the conversation and for seven minutes elder reasons for believing that the fishing was better on the west shore of lake than on the east though it was indeed quite true that on the east shore had caught a altogether admirable the talk went on it did go on their voices were monotonous thick emphatic they were harshly like men in the smoking of cars they did not bore they frightened her she panted they will be cordial to me because my man belongs to their tribe god help me if i were an smiling as as an ivory she sat avoiding thought glancing about the living room and hall noting their of commercial prosperity said interior eh my idea of how a place ought to be furnished modern she looked polite and observed the floors hard wood staircase fireplace with which resembled brown cut glass standing upon and the barred shut forbidding that were half filled with novels and looking sets of o henry and she perceived that even were failing to hold the party the room filled with as with a fog people cleared their throats tried to choke down the men shot their and the women stuck their firmly into their back hair then a rattle a daring hope in every eye the swinging of a door the smell of strong coffee s in a triumphant the eats they began to chatter they had something to do they could escape from themselves they fell upon the food chicken cake store ice cream even when the food was gone they remained cheerful they could go home any time now and go to bed they went with a flutter of coats and and walked home did you like them he asked they were terribly sweet to me you ought to be more careful about main street shocking folks talking about gold stockings and about showing your ankles to and all more mildly you gave em a good time but i d watch out for that f i were you is such a damn cat i wouldn t give her a chance to me my poor effort to lift up the party was i wrong to try to amuse them no no honey i didn t mean you were the only i and coming person in the bunch i just mean don t get legs and all that stuff pretty crowd she was silent raw with the shameful thought that the attentive circle might have been her laughing at her don t please don t worry he pleaded silence i m sorry i spoke about it i just meant but they were crazy about you sam said to me that little lady of yours is the thing that ever came to this town he said and ma i didn t hardly know whether she d like you or not she s such a dried up old bird but she said your bride is so quick and bright i declare she just wakes me up liked praise the flavor and of it but she was so being sorry for herself that she could not taste this please come on cheer up his lips said it his anxious shoulder said it his arm about her said it as they halted on the obscure porch of their house do you care if they i m will me why i wouldn t care if the whole world thought you were this or that or anything else you re my well you re my soul he was an mass as solid seeming as rock she found his sleeve pinched it cried i m glad it s sweet to be wanted you must my you re all i have he lifted her carried her into the house and with her arms about his neck she forgot main street chapter v we ll steal the day and go hunting i want you to see the country round here announced at breakfast i d take the car want you to see how swell she runs since i put in a new but we ll take a team so we can get right out into the fields not many chickens left now but we might just happen to nm a small he over his hunting he pulled his hip boots out to full length and examined them for holes he counted his shells her on the qualities of powder he drew the new out of its heavy tan leather case and made her peep through the barrels to see how free they were from the world of hunting and and fishing tackle was to her and in s interest she found something and joyous she examined the smooth stock the carved hard rubber butt of the gun the shells with their brass caps and sleek green bodies and on the were cool and comfortably heavy in her hands wore a brown canvas hunting coat with vast pockets the inside trousers which at the wrinkles and shoes a felt hat in this uniform he felt they out to the livery they packed the and	42
the box of into the back crying to each other that it was a magnificent day had borrowed elder s red and white english a complacent dog with a waving tail of silver hair which in the sunshine as they started the dog and leaped at the horses heads till took him into the where he s knees and leaned out to sneer at farm the out on the hard dirt road with a pleasant song of hoofs ta ta ta rat ta ta ta rat it was early and fresh the air whistling frost bright on the golden rod as the sun warmed the world of into a s main street of yellow they turned from the through the bars of a farmer s gate into a field slowly over the earth in a hollow of the rolling they lost sight even of the country road it was warm and placid among the dry wheat and brilliant little flies across the a of content filled the air and in the sky the dog had been let out and after a dance of excitement he settled down to a steady of the field forth and back forth and back his nose down owns this farm and he told me he saw a small of chickens in the west forty last week maybe we ll get some sport after all chuckled she watched the dog in suspense breathing quickly every time he seemed to halt she had no desire to slaughter birds but she did desire to belong to s world the dog stopped on the point a held up by he s hit a scent come on he leaped from the twisted the reins about the whip her out caught up his gun slipped in two shells stalked toward the rigid dog after him the crawled ahead his tail quivering his belly close to the was nervous she expected clouds of large birds to fly up instantly her eyes were strained with staring but they followed the dog for a quarter of a mile turning crossing two low hills kicking through a of weeds crawling between the of a fence the walking was hard on her pavement trained feet the earth was the and lined with grass of she dragged and she heard gasp look three gray birds were starting up from the they were like enormous bees was moving the barrel she was agitated why didn t he fire the birds would be gone then a crash another and two birds turned in the air down when he showed her the birds she had no sensation of blood these heaps of feathers were so soft and there was about them no hint of death she watched her conquering man them into his inside pocket and with him back to the main street they found no more chickens that morning at noon they drove into her first a private village a white house with no save a low and quite dirty stoop at the back a crimson barn with white a glazed brick an ex carriage shed now the of a ford an cow stable a chicken house a pig pen a a the iron skeleton tower of a the was of packed yellow clay barren of grass with rusty and wheels of discarded hardened trampled mud like filled the pig pen the doors of the house were rubbed the corners and were with rain and the child who stared at them from the kitchen window was faced but beyond the barn was a of scarlet the breeze was sunshine in motion the flashing metal blades of the with a lively hum a horse a in and out of the cow stable a small spare woman with hair trotted from the house she was a not in like english but singing it with a he say you pretty soon hunting doctor my dot s fine you is dis de bride ve say night ve hope maybe ve see her day my a pretty lady mrs was shining with welcome veil veil ay hope you dis country von t you stay for dinner doctor no but i wonder if you wouldn t like to give us a glass of milk condescended veil ay should say ay you a second and ay run on de milk house she nervously hastened to a tiny red building beside the she came back with a of milk from which filled the bottle as they drove off admired she s the dearest thing i ever saw and she you you are the lord of the oh no much pleased but still they do ask my advice about things bully people these farmers and prosperous too she s still scared of america but her will be doctors and lawyers and of the state and any thing they want to i wonder was plunged back into last night s main street i wonder if these farmers aren t bigger than we are so simple and hard working the town lives on them we are and yet we feel superior to them last night i heard mr talking about apparently he the farmers because they haven t reached the social heights of selling thread and buttons us where d the farmers be without the town who them money who why we supply them with everything don t you find that some of the farmers think they pay too much for the services of the towns oh of course there s a lot of among the farmers same as there are among any class listen to some of these a fellow d think that the farmers ought to rim the state and the whole shooting match probably if they had their way they d fill up the with a lot of farmers in covered boots yes and they d come tell me i was hired on a salary now and couldn t fix my that	42
d be fine for you wouldn t it but why shouldn t they why that bunch of telling me oh for heaven s sake let s quit arguing all this discussing may be all right at a party but let s forget it while we re hunting i know the probably it s a worse affliction than the i just wonder she told herself that she had everything in the world and after each self rebuke she stumbled again on i just wonder they ate their by a long grass reaching up out of clear water red winged the a splash of gold green smoked a pipe while she leaned back in the and let her tired spirit be absorbed in the of the sky they to the and awoke from their at the sound of the hoofs they paused to look for in a rim of woods little woods very clean and shiny and gay silver and with green trunks a lake of sandy bottom a seclusion in the of hot brought down a fat red and at dusk he had s main street a dramatic shot at a sight of ducks whirling down from the upper air the lake instantly vanishing they drove home under the of straw and wheat like bee stood out in startling and gold and the green as the vast of crimson darkened the fulfilled land became in deep and the black road before the turned to a faint then was blotted to uncertain cattle came in a long line up to the barred gates of the and over the resting land was a dark glow had found the dignity and greatness which had failed her in main street n till they had a maid they took noon dinner and six o clock supper at mrs s boarding house mrs of the dealer in hay and grain was a pointed woman with if on ray hair drawn so tight that it resembled a soiled handkerchief covering her head but she was unexpectedly cheerful and her dining room with its thin on a long pine table had the decency of clean in the line of guests like horses at a came to distinguish one countenance the pale long face and sandy hair of mr p known as professional bachelor manager and one half the force in the shoe department of the bon ton store you will enjoy very much mrs his eyes were like those of a dog waiting to be let in out of the cold he passed the there are a great many bright people here mrs the christian science reader is a very bright woman though i am not a myself in fact i sing in the choir and miss of the high school she is such a pleasing bright girl i was fitting her to a pair of tan yesterday i declare it really was a pleasure the butter was s comment she defied him by encouraging do you have amateur and so on here main street u oh yes the town s just full of talent the knights of put on a show last year it s nice you re so enthusiastic oh do you really think so lots of folks jolly me for to get up shows and so on i tell them they have more artistic gifts than they know just yesterday i was saying to harry if he would read poetry like or if he would join the band i get so much pleasure out of playing the and our band leader is such a good i often say he ought to give up his and become a professional he could play the in or new york or anywhere but but i couldn t get harry to see it at all and i hear you and the doctor went out yesterday lovely country isn t it and did you make some calls the life isn t inspiring like medicine it must be wonderful to see how trust you doctor it s me that s got to do all the trusting be damn sight more wonderful f they d pay their bills grumbled and to he whispered something which like gentleman hen but s pale eyes were watering at her she helped him with so you like to read poetry oh yes so much though to tell the truth i don t get much time for reading we re always so busy at the store and but we had the professional at the sisters last winter thought she heard a from the at the end f the table and s elbow was a embodied she persisted do you get to see many plays mr he shone at her like a dim blue march moon and sighed no but i do love the i m a real fan one trouble with books is that they re not so thoroughly by intelligent as the are and when you drop into the library and take out a book you never know what you re wasting your time on what i like in books is a wholesome really improving story and sometimes why once i started a novel by this fellow that you read about and it told how a lady wasn t living with her husband i mean she wasn t his wife it went into details and the english was real poor i spoke to the library about it and o main street they took it off the shelves vm not narrow but i must say i don t see any use in this deliberately dragging in life itself is so full of temptations that in literature one wants only that which is pure and what s the name of that where can i get hold of it the ignored him but tiie they are mostly clean and their humor don t you think that the most essential quality for a	42
person to have is a sense of humor i don t know i really haven t much said he shook his finger at her now now you re too modest i m sure we can all see that you have a perfectly sense of humor besides dr wouldn t marry a lady that didn t have we all know how he loves his fun you bet i m a old bird come on let s beat it remarked implored and what is your chief artistic interest mrs oh aware that the had murmured she desperately architecture that s a real nice art i ve always said when were finishing the new front on the bon ton building the old man came to me you know harry s father d h i always call him and he asked me how i liked it and i said to him look here d h i said you see he was going to leave front plain and i said to him it s all very well to have modern lighting and a big display space i said but when you get that in you want to have some architecture too i said and he laughed and said he guessed maybe i was right and so he had em put on a tin observed the his teeth like a mouse well what if it is tin that s not my fault i told d h to make it polished granite you make me tired leave us go come on leave us go from them in the hall and secretly informed that she t mind the s he belonged to the chuckled well child how about it do you prefer an artistic like to stupid like sam and me main street i my let s go home and play and laugh and be foolish and slip up to bed and sleep without dreaming it s beautiful to be just a solid m from the weekly one of the most charming affairs of the season was held tuesday evening at the handsome new residence of sam and mrs when many of our most prominent citizens gathered to greet the lovely new bride of our popular local physician dr will all present spoke of the many charms of the bride formerly miss of st paul games and were the order of the day with merry talk and conversation at a late hour dainty were served and the party broke up with many expressions of pleasure at the pleasant affair among those present were elder dr will for the past several years one of our most popular and skilful and gave the town a delightful surprise when he returned from an extended tour in this week with his charming bride miss of st paul whose family are prominent in and mrs is a lady of manifold charms not only of striking charm of appearance but is also a distinguished of a school in the east and has for the past year been connected in an important position of responsibility with the st paul public library in which city dr will had the good fortune to meet her the city of her to our midst and for her many happy years in the energetic city of the twin lakes and the future the dr and mrs will reside for the present at the doctor s home on street which his charming mother has been keeping for him who has now returned to her own home at qui leaving a host of friends who regret her absence and hope to see her soon with us again iv she knew that if she was ever to effect any of the which she had pictured she must have a starting place what confused her during the three or four months after her marriage was not lack of perception that she must be definite but sheer careless happiness of her first home in the pride of being a she loved every detail the with the weak back even the brass water main street cock on the hot water when she had become familiar with it by trying to it to she foimd a maid plump radiant from crossing was droll in her attempt to be at once a respectful servant and a bosom friend they laughed together over the fact that the stove did not draw over the of fish in the pan like a child playing in a trailing skirt for her crying greetings to along the way everybody bowed to her strangers and all and made her feel that they wanted her that she belonged here in city shops she was merely a customer a hat a voice to bore a harassed clerk here she was mrs and her in fruit and manners were known and remembered and worth discussing even if they weren t worth was a delight of brisk the very merchants whose she found the at the two or three parties which were given to welcome her were the of all when they had something to talk about or cotton or floor oil with that jack the she conducted a long mock quarrel she pretended that he cheated her in the price of magazines and he pretended she was a from the twin cities he hid behind the and when she stamped her foot he came out wailing honest i haven t done nothing crooked today not yet she never recalled her first impression of main street never had precisely the same despair at its by the end of two everything had changed proportions as she never entered it the house ceased to exist for her s store s store the of and and the meat the notions they expanded and hid all other when she entered mr s store and he mrs veil dis a fine day she did not notice the of the shelves nor the stupidity of	42
the girl clerk and she did not remember the mute with him on her first view of main street she could not find half the kinds of food she wanted but that made more of an adventure when she did main street contrive to get at s meat market the was so vast that she with excitement and admired the strong wise butcher mr she appreciated the homely ease of village life she liked the old men farmers r who when they sometimes on their heels on the like resting indians and over the she found beauty in the children she had suspected that her married friends exaggerated their passion for children but in her work in the library children had become individuals to her citizens of the state with their own rights and their own senses of humor in the library she had not had much time to give them but now she knew the luxury of stopping gravely asking whether her had yet recovered from its and agreeing with that it would be good fun to go she touched the thought it would be sweet to have a baby of my own i do want one tiny not yet there s so much to do and i m still tired from the job it s in my bones she rested at home she listened to the village noises common to all the world or sounds simple and charged with dogs barking chickens making a sound of content children at play a man beating a rug wind in the trees a a footstep on the walk voices of and a s boy in the kitchen a a piano not too near twice a week at least she drove into the country with to hunt ducks in lakes with sunset or to call on who looked up to her as the squire s lady and thanked her for toys and magazines evenings she went with her husband to the motion pictures and was greeted by every other couple or till it became too cold they sat on the porch to by in or to neighbors who were the leaves the dust became golden in the low sun the street was filled with the fragrance of burning leaves but she wanted some one to whom she could say what she thought main street on a slow afternoon when she over sewing and wished that the would ring announced miss despite s lively blue eyes if you had looked at her in detail you would have found her face slightly lined and not so much sallow as with the bloom rubbed off you would have found her chest flat and her fingers rough from needle and chalk and her and plain cloth skirts and her hat worn too far back betraying a dry forehead but you never did look at in detail you couldn t her electric activity veiled her she was as energetic as a her fingers fluttered her sympathy came out in she sat on the edge of a chair in eagerness to be near her to send her and across she rushed into the room pouring out i m afraid think the teachers have been shabby in not coming near you but we wanted to give you a chance to get i am and i try to teach french and english and a few other things in the high school ive been hoping to know the teachers you see i was a oh you needn t tell me i know all about you awful how much i know this village we need you so much here it s a dear loyal town and isn t loyalty the finest thing in the world but it s a rough diamond and we need you for the and we re ever so humble she stopped for breath and finished her compliment with a smile if i could help you in any way would i be committing the sin if i whispered that i think is a tiny bit ugly of course it s ugly dreadfully though i m probably the only person in town to whom you could safely say that except perhaps the lawyer have you met him oh you must he s simply a darling intelligence and culture and so gentle but i don t care so much about the that will change it s the spirit that gives me hope it s sound wholesome but afraid it needs live creatures like you to awaken it i shall slave drive you splendid what shall i do i ve been wondering if it would be possible to have a good come here to lecture main street ye es but don t you think it would be better to work with existing perhaps it will sound slow to you but i was thinking it would be lovely if we could get you to teach sunday school had the empty expression of one who that she has been affectionately bowing to a complete stranger v oh yes but i m afraid i wouldn t be much good at that my religion is so i know so is mine i don t care a bit for though i do stick to the belief in the of god and the brotherhood of man and the of as you do of course looked respectable and thought about having tea and that s all you need teach in school it s the personal influence then there s the library board you d be so useful on that and of course there s our women s study club the club are they doing anything or do they read papers made out of the miss shrugged perhaps but still they are so earnest they will respond to your interest and the does do a good social work they ve made the city plant ever so many trees and they run the	42
rest room for farmers wives and they do take such an interest in refinement and culture so in fact so very unique was disappointed by nothing very she said politely think them all over i must have a while to look first miss darted to her smoothed her hair peered at her oh my dear don t you suppose i know these first tender days of marriage they re sacred to me home and children that need you and depend on you to keep them alive and turn to you with their little smiles and the hearth and she hid her face from as she made an activity of patting the cushion of her chair but she went on with her former i mean you must help us when you re ready i m afraid think i m i am so much to all this treasure of american and and maybe not at palm beach but thank heaven we re free from such social distinctions in i have only one good quality overwhelming main street belief in the brains and hearts of our nation our state our town it s so strong that sometimes i do have a tiny effect on the haughty ten i shake em up and make em believe in yes in themselves but i get into a of teaching i need young critical things like you to punch me up tell me what are you reading i ve been re reading the of ware do you know it yes it was clever but hard man wanted to tear down not build up cynical oh i do hope i m not a but i can t see any use in this high art stuff that doesn t encourage us day to on ensued a fifteen minute argument about the oldest topic in the world it s art but is it pretty tried to be eloquent regarding honesty of observation miss stood out for sweetness and a cautious use of the properties of light at the end cried i don t care how much we it s a relief to have somebody talk something besides crops let s make rock to its let s have afternoon tea instead of afternoon coffee the delighted helped her bring out the folding sewing table whose yellow and black top was with dotted lines from a s tracing wheel and to set it with an embroidered lunch cloth and the glazed tea set which she had brought from st paul miss confided her latest scheme moral motion pictures for country districts with light from a to a ford engine was twice called to fill the hot water and to make toast when came home at five he tried to be as the husband of one who has afternoon tea suggested that miss stay for supper and that invite the much praised lawyer the poetic bachelor yes could come yes he was over the which had prevented his going to sam s party regretted her impulse the man would be an heavily about the bride but at the entrance of she discovered a personality was a man of perhaps thirty eight slender still his voice was low it was very good of you to want me main street he said and he offered no humorous remarks and did not ask her if she didn t think was the little in the state she fancied that his even might reveal a thousand tints of and blue and silver at supper he hinted his love for sir thomas arthur charles he presented his but he expanded in s in miss s praise in s of any one who amused his wife wondered why went on digging at routine law cases why he remained in she had no one whom she could ask neither nor would that there might be reasons why a should not remain in she enjoyed the faint mystery she felt triumphant and rather literary she already had a group it would be only a while now before she provided the town with and a knowledge of she was doing things as she served the emergency of and she cried to don t you think we ought to get up a dramatic m chapter vi when the november snow had down with white the bare in the fields when the first small fire had been started in the furnace which is the shrine of a home began to make the house her own she dismissed the parlor furniture the golden oak table with brass the chairs the picture of the doctor she went to to through department stores and small tenth street shops devoted to and high thought she had to ship her treasures but she wanted to bring them back in her arms had torn out the between front parlor and back parlor thrown it into a long room on which she yellow and deep blue a with an of gold thread on stiff which she hung as a against the wall a couch with pillows of velvet and gold bands chairs which in seemed she hid the sacred family in the dining room and replaced its stand with a square cabinet on which was a blue jar between yellow candles decided against a fireplace we ll have a new house in a couple of years anyway she decorated only one room the rest hinted she d better leave till he made a ten strike the brown of a house stirred and awakened it seemed to be in motion it welcomed her back from it lost its the supreme verdict was s well by i was afraid the new wouldn t be so comfortable but i must say this or whatever you call it is a lot better than that old sofa we had and when i look around well it s worth all it cost i guess every one in town took an interest	42
in the the and painters who did not actually assist crossed the lawn to peer through the windows and exclaim main street looks swell at the store harry and at the bon ton repeated daily how s the good work coming i hear the house is getting to be real even mrs mrs lived across the alley from the rear of s house she was a widow and a prominent and a good influence she had so painfully reared three sons to be christian gentlemen that one of them had become an one a professor of greek and one n a boy of fourteen who was still at home the most brazen member of the gang in was not the type of good influence she was the soft damp fat sighing clinging melancholy hopeful kind there are in every large chicken yard a number of old and indignant who resemble mrs and when they are served at sunday noon dinner as chicken with thick they up the resemblance j had noted that mrs from her side window t an eye upon the house the and mrs did not move in the same sets which meant precisely the same in as it did on fifth avenue or in but the good widow came calling she in sighed gave a hand sighed glanced sharply at the revelation of ankles as crossed her legs sighed the new blue chairs smiled with a sighing sound and gave voice ive wanted to call on you so long you know we re neighbors but i thought i d wait till you got settled you must run in and see me how much did that big chair cost seventy seven dollars alive well i suppose it s all right for them that can afford it though i do sometimes think of course as our said once at by the way we haven t seen you there yet and of course your husband was raised up a and i do hope he won t drift away from the fold of course we all know there isn t anything not cleverness or gifts of gold or anything that can make up for humility and the inward grace and they can say what they want to about the p e church but of course there s no church that has more history or has stayed by the true principles of christianity main street better than the church and in what church were you raised mrs w why i went to as a girl in but my college was well but of course as the bible says is it the bible at least i know i have heard it in church and everybody admits it it s proper for the little bride to take her husband s vessel of faith so we all hope we shall see you at the church and as i was sa of course i agree with reverend in thinking that the great trouble with this nation today is lack of spiritual faith so few going to church and people on and heaven knows what all but still i do think that one trouble is this terrible waste of money people feeling that they ve got to have bath and in their houses i heard you were selling the old furniture cheap yes of course you know your own mind but i can t help thinking when will s ma was down here keeping house for him she used to run in to see me real it was good enough furniture for her but there there i mustn t i just wanted to let you know that when you find you can t depend on a lot of these yoimg folks like the and the and heaven only knows how much money blows in in a year why then you may be glad to know that slow old is always right there and heaven knows a sigh i hope you and your husband won t have any of the troubles with sickness and and wasting money and all that so many of these young couples do have and but i must be running along now it s been such a pleasure and just run in and see me any time i hope will is well i thought he looked a it was twenty minutes later when mrs finally out of the front door ran back into the living room and jerked open the windows that woman has left damp finger prints in the air she said main street n i was extravagant but at least she did not try to clear herself of blame by going about i know i m i terribly extravagant but i don t seem to be able to help it had never thought of giving her an allowance his mother had never had one as a earning had asserted to her fellow when she was married she was going to have an allowance and be and modern but it was too much trouble to explain to s kindly that she was a practical housekeeper as well as a she bought a account book and made her as exact as are likely to be when they lack for the first month it was a jest to beg prettily to confess i haven t a cent in the house dear and to be told you re an extravagant little rabbit but the book made her realize how were her she became self conscious occasionally she was indignant that she should always have to petition him for the money with which to buy his food she caught herself his belief that since his joke about trying to keep her out of the had once been accepted as admirable humor it should continue to be his daily bon it was a nuisance to have to run down the street after him because she had forgotten to ask him for	42
money at breakfast but she couldn t hurt his feelings she reflected he liked the of giving she tried to reduce the of begging by opening accounts and having the bills sent to him she had foimd that sugar flour could be most purchased at s rustic general store she said sweetly to i think i d better open a charge here i don t do no business except for cash she do you know who i am sure i know the is good for it but that s a rule i made i make low prices i do business for cash she stared at his red face and her fingers had the desire to slap him but her reason agreed with him you re quite right you shouldn t break your rule for me main street her rage had not been lost it had been transferred to her husband she wanted ten pounds of sugar in a hurry but she had no money she ran up the stairs to s office on the door was a sign a headache cure and stating the doctor is out back at naturally the blank space was not filled out she stamped her foot she ran down to the store the doctor s club as she entered she heard mrs demanding i ve got to have some money saw that her husband was there and two other men all listening in amusement snapped how much do you want dollar be enough no it won t ive got to get some for the why good lord they got enough now to fill the closet so i couldn t find my hunting boots last time i wanted them i don t care they re all in rags you got to give me ten dollars perceived that mrs was accustomed to this she perceived that the men particularly regarded it as an excellent jest she waited she knew what would come it did where s that ten dollars i gave you last year and he looked to the other men to laugh they laughed cold and still walked up to and commanded i want to see you upstairs why something the matter yes he after her up the stairs into his barren office before he could get out a she stated yesterday in front of a saloon i heard a german beg her husband for a quarter to get a toy for the baby and he refused just now i ve heard mrs going through the same humiliation and i i m in the same position i have to beg you for money daily i have just been informed that i couldn t have any sugar because i hadn t the money to pay for it who said that by god i ll kill any tut it wasn t his fault it was yours and mine i now humbly beg you to give me the money with which to buy meals for you to eat and hereafter to remember it the next time main street i sha n t beg i shall simply starve do you understand i can t go on being a slave her defiance her enjoyment of the ran out she was sobbing against his overcoat how can you shame me so and he was dog gone it i meant to give you some and i forgot it i swear i won t again by i won t he pressed fifty dollars upon her and after that he remembered to give her money regularly sometimes daily she determined but i must have a stated be business like system i must do something about it and daily she didn t do anything about it m mrs had by the of her comments on the new furniture stirred to economy she spoke to about left she read the again and like a child with a book she studied the of the beef which gallantly continues to though it is divided into cuts but she was a deliberate and joyous in her preparations for her first party the she made lists on every envelope and slip in her desk she sent orders to fancy she pinned patterns and she was irritated when was about these frightful big doings that are going on she regarded the affair as an attack on s timidity in pleasure i ll make em lively if nothing else i ll em stop regarding parties as committee meetings usually considered himself the master of the house at his desire she went hunting which was his symbol of happiness and she ordered for breakfast which was his symbol of morality but when he came home on the afternoon before the he found himself a slave an intruder a fix the furnace so you won t have to touch it after supper and for heaven s sake take that horrible old door mat off the porch and put on your nice brown and white shirt why did you come home so late would you mind hurrying here it is almost and those are just as likely as not to come at seven instead of eight please hurry main street she was as unreasonable as an amateur leading woman on a first night and he was reduced to humility when she came down to supper when she stood in the doorway he gasped she was in a silver the of a lily her piled hair like black glass she had the and of a and her eyes were intense he was stirred to rise from the table and to hold the chair for her and all through supper he ate his bread dry because he felt that she would think him common if he said will you hand me the butter iv she had reached the calmness of not caring whether her guests liked the party or not and a state of satisfied suspense in regard to s in	42
serving before cried from the bay window in the living room here comes somebody and mr and mrs faltered in at a quarter to eight then in a shy arrived the entire aristocracy of all persons engaged in a profession or earning more than twenty five hundred dollars a year or possessed of born in america even while they were removing their they were peeping at the new saw turn over the gold pillows to find a price and heard mr the attorney gasp well vi be as he viewed the print hanging against the she was amused but her high spirits as she beheld them form in dress parade in a long silent uneasy circle clear round the living room she felt that she had been back to her first party at sam s have i got to lift them like so many pigs of iron i don t know that i can make them happy but i ll make them a silver same in the circle she whirled around drew them with her smile and sang i want my party to be noisy and this is the of my house and i want you to help me have a bad influence on it so that it will be a giddy house for me won t you all join in an old fashioned square dance and mr will call she had a record on the was in the of the floor loose lean small rusty main street headed pointed of nose clapping his hands and shouting swing y even the and and professor george danced looking only slightly foolish and by rushing about the room and being and to all persons over forty five got them into a and a virginia but when she left them to themselves in their own way harry put a one step record on the the people took the floor and all the elders back to their chairs with smiles which meant don t believe try this one myself but i do enjoy watching the dance half of were silent half resumed the of that afternoon in the store for something to say hid a and offered to the owner of the flour mill how d you folks like the new furnace l mi so oh let them alone don t them they must like it or they wouldn t do it warned herself but they gazed at her so when she past that she was that in their of respectability they had lost the power of play as well as the power of thought even the dancers were gradually crushed by the invisible force of fifty perfectly pure and well behaved and negative minds and they sat down two by two in twenty minutes the party was again elevated to the decorum of a prayer meeting we re going to do something exciting exclaimed to her new she saw that in the growing quiet her voice had carried across the room and were abstracted fingers and lips slightly moving she knew with a cold certainty that was his about the catching the hen over the first lines of an old sweetheart of mine and thinking of his popular on mark s but i will not have anybody use the word in my house she whispered to miss that s good i tell you why not have sing why my dear he s the most sentimental in town main street see here child i your opinions on house are sound but your opinions of people are rotten i does wag his tail but the poor dear longing for what he calls self expression and no training in anything except selling shoes but he can sing and some day when he gets away from harry s patronage and ridicule he ll do something fine for her she urged i and warned the of we all want yo to sing mr you re the only famous actor i m going to let appear on the stage tonight while blushed and admitted oh they don t want to hear me he was clearing his throat pulling his clean handkerchief farther out of his breast pocket and thrusting his fingers between the buttons of his in her affection for s in her desire to discover artistic talent prepared to be delighted by the recital sang fly as a bird thou art my dove and when the little swallow leaves its tiny nest all in a reasonably bad tenor was shuddering with the shame which sensitive people feel when they listen to an being humorous or to a child publicly doing badly what no child should do at all she wanted to laugh at the gratified importance in s half shut eyes she wanted to weep over the meek which clouded like an his pale face ears and sandy she tried to look admiring for the benefit of miss that trusting admirer of all that was or could be the good the true and the beautiful at the end of the third miss roused from her attitude of inspired vision and breathed to my that was sweet of course hasn t an unusually good voice but don t you think he puts such a lot of feeling into it lied and but without originality oh yes i do think he has so much feeling she saw that after the strain of listening in a manner the audience had had given up their last hope of being amused she cried now we re going to play an game which i learned in you will have to main street take off your shoes for a after that you will probably break your knees and shoulder blades much attention and incredulity a few eyebrows indicating a verdict that s bride was noisy and improper i shall choose the most vicious like and myself as the the rest of you are wolves your shoes are the sheep the wolves go out into	42
anything whatever about chinese but he had read a book on the subject as on lonely evenings in his office he had read at least one book on every subject in the world s thin maturity was changing in her vision to flushed youth and they were an island in the yellow sea of chatter when she realized that the guests were beginning that cough which indicated in the instinctive language that they desired to go home and go to bed while they asserted that it had been the party they d ever seen my so clever and original she smiled shook hands and cried many suitable things regarding and being sure to wrap up warmly and s singing and s at games then she turned wearily to in a house filled with quiet and and of chinese he was i tell you you certainly are a wonder and guess you re right about waking folks up now you ve showed em how they won t go on having the same old kind of parties and and everything here i don t touch a thing done enough pop up to bed and clear up his wise surgeon s hands her shoulder and her irritation at his was lost in his strength v from the weekly one of the most delightful social events of recent months was held wednesday evening in the of dr and mrs who have completely their charming home on street and is now extremely in modern color scheme the doctor and his bride were at home to their numerous friends and a number of in were held including a chinese in original and genuine oriental of which ye editor was leader dainty were served in true oriental style and one and all a delightful time the week after the gave a party the circle of kept its place al evening and did the of the and the hen chapter vn was digging in for the winter through late november and all december it daily the was at and might drop to twenty below or thirty winter is not a season in the north it is an industry storm sheds were erected at every door in every block the sam the wealthy mr all save who hired a boy were seen staggering up carrying storm windows and them to second story while put up his windows danced inside the and begged him not to swallow the which he held in his mouth like an extraordinary set of external false teeth the universal sign of winter was the town miles a tall thick red bachelor general store cynical children loved him and he away from work to tell them improbable stories of sea and horse trading and bears the children s parents either laughed at him or hated him he was the one in town he called both the miller and the from lost lake by their first names he was known as the red and considered slightly insane could do anything with his hands a pan an spring soothe a frightened a dock a which went into a bottle now for a week he was general of he was the only person besides the at sam s who understood everybody begged him to look over the furnace and the water pipes he rushed from house to house till after ten o clock from burst water pipes hung along the skirt of his brown overcoat his cap which he never took off in the house was a of ice and coal dust his red hands were cracked to he the of a cigar i main street but he was to he stooped to examine the furnace he straightened glanced down at her and hemmed got to fix your furnace no matter what else i do the poorer houses of where the services of miles were a luxury which included the of miles were to the lower windows with earth and along the railroad the sections of snow fence which had been all summer in romantic wooden tents occupied by small boys were set up to prevent from covering the track the farmers came into town in home made with and hay piled in the rough boxes fur coats fur caps fur almost to the knees gray ten feet long thick canvas lined with yellow wool like the of red flannel for the blazing wrists of boys these against winter were busily dug out of ball sprinkled drawers and tar bags in and all over town small bo rs were oh there s my or look at my shoe there is so sharp a division between the panting summer and the winter of the northern plains that they with surprise and a feeling of heroism this of an winter garments surpassed even personal gossip as the topic at parties it was good form to ask put on your yet there were as many distinctions in as in cars the lesser sort appeared in yellow and black coats but was in a long and a new seal cap when the snow was too deep for his he went off on country calls in a shiny only his ruddy nose and his cigar emerging from the fur herself stirred main street by a loose coat of her finger tips loved the silken fur her activity now was sports in the the and had not only made more evident the social divisions in but they had also the love of activity it was so rich looking to sit and drive and so easy and sliding were stupid and old fashioned in fact the village longed for the main street of city almost as much as the cities longed for village sports and took as much pride in as st paul or new york in going did inspire a successful party in mid november lake in clear sweeps of ice ringing to the on	42
shore the ice tipped in the wind and oak twigs with stubborn last leaves hung against a sky harry did figure and was certain that she had found the perfect life but when snow had ended the and she tried to get up a moonlight sliding party the hesitated to stir away from their and their daily bridge of the city she had to them they down a long hill on a bob they upset and got snow down their necks they shrieked that they would do it again immediately and they did not do it again at all she another group into going they shouted and threw and informed her that it was such fun and they d have another expedition right way and they returned home and never thereafter left their of bridge was discouraged she was grateful when invited her to go rabbit hunting in the woods she down between burnt stump and icy oak through marked with a million of rabbit and mouse and bird she as he leaped on a pile of brush and fired at the rabbit which ran out he belonged there masculine in and and high boots that night she ate of and potatoes she produced electric sparks by touching his ear with her finger tip she slept twelve hours and awoke to think how glorious was this brave land she rose to a radiance of sun on snow snug in her she trotted up town smoked against a sky colored like blossoms bells shouts of greeting were loud in the thin bright air and here was a sound of wood it was saturday and the neighbors sons were getting up the winter fuel behind walls of wood in back yards their stood in scattered with yellow of the frames of their buck were cherry red the blades steel and the fresh cut ends of the sticks iron main street wood were marked with engraved rings of growth the boys wore shoe blue flannel shirts with enormous pearl buttons and of crimson yellow and brown cried fine to the she came in a glow to s her collar white with frost from her breath she bought a can of as though it were fruit and returned home planning to surprise with an for dinner so brilliant was the snow glare that when she entered the house she saw the door the newspaper on the table every white surface as dazzling and her head was dizzy in the when her eyes had recovered she felt expanded drunk with health mistress of life the world was so luminous that she sat down at her little desk in the living room to make a poem she got no farther than the sky is bright the sun is warm there ne er will be another storm in the mid afternoon of this same day was called into the country it was s evening out her evening for the dance was alone from three till midnight she wearied of reading pure love stories in the magazines and sat by a t to brood thus she chanced to discover that she had nothing to do n she had she meditated passed through the novelty of seeing the town and meeting people of and sliding and hunting was competent there was no household labor except sewing and and assistance to in bed making she t satisfy her ingenuity in planning meals at s meat market you didn t give orders you whether there was anything today besides and pork and ham the cuts of beef were not cuts they were lamb were as as the meat their best to the city with its higher prices all the shops there was the same lack of choice she could not find a glass headed picture nail in town she did not hunt for the sort of she wanted she took what she could get and only at s was there such main street a luxury as routine care was all she could devote to the house only by such as the widow s could she make it fill her time she could not have outside employment to the village doctor s wife it was she was a woman with a working brain and no work there were only three things which she could do have children start her career of or become so definitely a part of the town that she would be fulfilled by the of ch and study club and bridge parties children yes she wanted them but she was not quite ready she had been embarrassed by s frankness but she agreed with him that in the insane condition of civilization whidi made the of citizens more costly and perilous than any other crime it was to have children till he had made more money she was sorry perhaps he had made all the mystery of love a mechanical but she fled from the thought with a some day her her impulses toward beauty in raw main street they had become indistinct but she would set them going now she would she swore it with soft fist beating the edges of the and at the end of all her vows she had no notion as to when and where the was to begin become an part of the town she began to think with unpleasant she reflected that she did not know whether the people liked her she had gone to the women at afternoon co to the merchants in their stores with so many comments and that she hadn t given them a to their opinions of her the men smiled but did they like her she was lively among the women but was she one of them she could not recall many times when she had been admitted to the whispering of scandal which is the secret chamber of conversation she was poisoned with doubt as she drooped	42
up to bed next day through her her mind sat back and observed and sam were as cordial as she had been but wasn t there an in the h are of the was was that merely his usual manner it s to have to pay attention to what people think in st paul i didn t care but here i m on main street they re watching me i mustn t let it make me self conscious she herself by the of thou t and on the m a which stripped the snow from the a ringing iron night when the lakes could be heard a clear morning in o and skirt felt herself a college junior going out to play she wanted to her legs a ed to run on the way home from she yielded as a would have yielded she galloped down a block and as she jumped from a across a of she gave a student she saw that in a window three old women were gasping their triple glare was across the street at another window the curtain had moved she stopped walked on changed from the girl into mrs dr she never again felt quite young enough and defiant enough and free enough to run and in the public streets and it was as a nice married woman that she attended the next weekly bridge of the jolly seventeen iv the jolly seventeen the of which ranged from fourteen to twenty six was the social of it was the country club the set the st the oval room the club de to belong to it was to be in though its partly with that of the study club the jolly seventeen as a separate at the and considered it middle class and even most of the jolly seventeen were young married women with their husbands as associate members once a week they had a women s afternoon bridge once a month the husbands joined them for supper and evening bridge twice a year they had dances at i o o f hall then the town exploded only at the annual balls of the and of the eastern star was there such of and and heart and these rival institutions were not main street hired girls attended the s ball with section hands and had once gone to a jolly seventeen in the village hack hitherto confined to chief at and harry and dr always appeared in the town s only specimens of evening clothes the afternoon bridge of the jolly seventeen which followed s lonely doubting was held at s new with its door of polished oak and plate glass jar of in the hall and in the living room a oak chair sixteen color prints and a square table with a mat made of cigar ribbons on whidi was one illustrated gift edition and one pack of cards in a leather case stepped into a of furnace heat they were already playing despite her she had not yet learned bridge she was about it to and ashamed that she should have to go on being mrs a sallow woman with a thin devoted to experiments in religious and shook her finger at and you re a naughty one i don t believe you appreciate the honor when you got into the jolly seventeen so easy mrs her neighbor at the second table but kept up the appealing manner so far as possible she you re perfectly right i m a lazy thing make will start teaching me this very evening her had all the sound of in the nest and church bells and christmas cards she that ought to be enough she sat in the smallest rocking chair a model of modesty but she saw or she imagined that the women who had at her so when she had first come to were nodding at her during the pause after the first game she mrs elder don t you think we ought to get up another bob party soon it s so cold when you get in the snow said mrs elder indifferently i hate snow down my neck volunteered mrs with an unpleasant look at and turning her back she main street at won t you run in this evening i ve got the new pattern i want to show you crept back to her chair in the of discussing the game they ignored her she was not used to being a she struggled to keep from from becoming by the sure method of believing that she was but she hadn t much reserve of patience and at the end of the second game when asked her are you going to send to for your dress for the next heard you were said don t know yet with unnecessary she was relieved by the admiration with which the looked at the steel on her but she resented mrs s demand don t you find that new couch of yours is too broad to be practical she nodded then shook her head and left mrs to get out of it any she desired immediately she wanted to make peace she was dose to in the sweetness with which she addressed mrs i think that is the prettiest display of beef tea your husband has in his store oh yes isn t so much behind the times mrs some one their made her haughty her irritated them to they were working up to a state of painfully righteous war when they were saved by the coming of food though was highly advanced in the matters of finger and bath her were typical of all the afternoon s best friends mrs and mrs passed large dinner plates each with a spoon a fork and a coffee cup without they and discussed the afternoon s game as they passed through the thicket of women s feet then they distributed hot rolls coffee	42
poured from an ware pot stuffed and angel s food cake there was even in the most strictly circles a certain as to the need not be stuffed were in some houses well thought of as a substitute for the hot rolls but there was in all the town no save who omitted angel s food main street they ate had a suspicion that the made the afternoon treat do for evening supper she tried to get back into the current she edged over to mrs amiable young mrs with her breast and arms of a and her loud delayed laugh which burst from a sober face was the daughter of old dr and the wife of s partner dr asserted that and and their families were but had found them gracious she asked for friendliness by crying to mrs how is the baby s throat now and she was attentive while mrs rocked and and placidly described symptoms came in after school with miss the town miss s presence gave more confidence she talked she informed the circle i drove almost down to with will a few days ago isn t the country lovely and i do admire the farmers down there so their big red and and machines and everything do you all know that lonely church with the tin covered spire that stands out alone on a hill it s so bleak somehow it seems so brave i do think the the and best people oh do you think so protested mrs elder my husband says the that work in tie mill are perfectly terrible so silent and and so selfish the way they keep demanding raises if they had their way they d simply ruin business yes and they re simply ghastly hired girls i mrs i swear i work myself to skin and bone trying to please my hired girls when i can get them i do everything in the world for them they can have their gentleman friends call on them in the kitchen any time and they get just the same to eat as we do if there s any left over and i practically never jump on them rattled they re ungrateful all that class of people i do think the domestic problem is simply becoming awful i don t know what the country s coming to with these demanding every cent you can save and so ignorant and impertinent and on my word demanding main street bath and ever as if they weren t mighty good and lucky at home if they got a bath in the wash tub they were off riding hard thought of and them but isn t it possibly the fault of the if the maids are ungrateful for generations we ve given them the of food and holes to live in i don t want to boast but i must say i don t have much trouble with she s so friendly the are sturdy and honest mrs snapped honest do you call it honest to hold us up for every cent of pay they can get i can t say that i ve had any of them steal anything though you might call it stealing to eat so much that a roast of beef hardly lasts three days but just the same i don t intend to let them think they can put anything over on me i always make them pack and their trunks down stairs ri t under my eyes and then i know they aren t being tempted to by any on my part how much do the maids get here ventured mrs b j wife of the banker stated in a shocked manner any place from three fifty to five fifty a week i know positively that mrs after swearing that she wouldn t and encourage them in their outrageous demands went and paid five fifty think of it i practically a dollar a day for work and of course her food and room and a chance to do her own washing right in with the rest of the wash how much do you pay mrs yes how much do you pay insisted half a dozen w why i pay six a week she feebly confessed they gasped protested don t you think it s hard on the rest of us when you pay so much s demand was re by the universal was angry i don t care a maid has one of the hardest on earth she works from ten to eighteen hours a day she has to wash dishes and dirty clothes she the children and runs to the door with wet hands and mrs broke into s with a furious that s all very well but believe me i do those things myself when i m without a maid and that s a good share of the time for a person that isn t willing to yield and pay wages main street was but a maid does it for strangers and all she gets out of it is the pay their eyes were hostile four of them were talking at once s voice cut took control of the revolution tut tut tut tut i what angry passions and what an discussion i all of you getting too serious stop it you re probably right but you re too much ahead of the times quit looking so what is this a card party or a hen fight you stop admiring yourself as the of arc of the hired girls or i ll you you come over here and talk with if there s any more i ll take charge of the hen myself they all laughed and talked a small town the wives of a village doctor and a village dry goods merchant a provincial teacher a over paying a servant a dollar more a week yet this echoed cellar plots and	42
cabinet meetings and labor in and rome and boston and the who deemed themselves leaders were but the raised voices of a a million with a hundred thousand trying to away the storm felt guilty she devoted herself to admiring the miss and immediately committed another against the laws of decency we haven t seen you at the library yet miss ive wanted to run in so much but i ve been getting settled and i ll probably come in so often you ll get tired of me i hear you have such a nice library there are many who like it we have two thousand more books than isn t that fine i m sure you are largely responsible ive had some experience in st paul so i have been informed not that i entirely approve of library methods in these large cities so careless letting and all sorts of dirty persons practically sleep in the reading rooms i know but the poor souls well i m sure you will main street agree with me in one thing the chief task of a is to get people to read you feel so my feeling mrs and i am merely quoting the of a very large college is that the first duty of the conscientious is to preserve the books repented her oh miss and attacked it may be all very well in cities where they have unlimited funds to let nasty children ruin books and just deliberately tear them up and fresh young men take more books out than they are entitled to by the but i m never going to permit it in this library what if some children are destructive they learn to read books are cheaper than minds nothing is cheaper than the minds of some of these children that come in and bother me simply because their mothers don t keep them home where they belong some may choose to be so and turn their into nursing homes and but as long as i m in charge the library is going to be quiet and decent and the books well kept saw that the others were listening waiting for her to be objectionable she before their dislike she hastened to smile in agreement with miss to glance publicly at her wrist watch to that it was so late have to hurry home husband such nice party maybe you were right about maids prejudiced because so nice such perfectly divine angel s food mrs must give me the good by such happy party she walked home she reflected it was my fault i was and i opposed them so much only i can tl i can t be one of them if i must damn all the maids toiling in filthy all the ragged hungry children and these women are to be my the rest of my life she ignored s call from the kitchen she ran up stairs to the guest room she wept in terror her body a pale arc as she knelt beside a black bed beside a covered with a red in a and room chapter vm don t i in looking for things to do show that i m not attentive enough to will am i impressed enough by his work i will be oh i will be if i can t be one of the town if i must be an outcast when came home she dear you must tell me a lot more about your cases i want to know i want to understand sure you bet and he went down to fix the furnace at supper she asked for instance what did you do today do today how do you mean i want to understand today oh there wasn t much of anything couple with and a wrist and a fool woman that thinks she wants to kill herself because her husband doesn t like her and just routine work but the unhappy woman doesn t sound routine her just case of nerves you can t do much with these marriage mix but dear please will you tell me about the next case that you do think is interesting you bet tell you about anything that say that s pretty good salmon get it at s n four days after the jolly seventeen called and casually blew s world to pieces may i come in and gossip a while she said with such excess of bright innocence that was took off her with a she sat down as though it were a g exercise she out feel good this weather says if he had my energy he d be a grand opera singer g main street i always think this climate is the finest in the world and my friends are the dearest people in the world and my work is the most essential thing in the world probably i fool myself but i know one thing for certain you re the little idiot in the world and so you are about to me alive was cheerful about it am i perhaps ive been wondering i know that the third party to a is often the most to blame the one who runs between a and b having a beautiful time telling each of them what the other has said but i want you to take a big part in and so such a very unique opportunity and am i silly i know what you mean i was too abrupt at the jolly seventeen it isn t that matter of fact i m glad you told them some wholesome truths about servants though perhaps you were just a bit it s bigger than that i wonder if you understand that in a secluded community like this every is on test people cordial to her but watching her all the time i remember when a latin teacher came here from they	42
resented her broad a were sure it was affected of course they have discussed you have they talked about me much my dear i always feel as though i walked around in a cloud looking out at others but not being seen i feel so and so normal so normal that there s nothing about me to discuss i can t realize that mr and mrs must gossip about me was working up a small passion of and i don t like it it makes me to think of their daring to talk over all i do and say me over i resent it i hate wait child perhaps they resent some things in you i want you to try and be they d over anybody who came in new didn t you with in yes well then will you be i m paying you the compliment of supposing that you can be i want you to be big enough to help me make this town worth while i ll be as as cold boiled potatoes not that main street i shall be able to help you make the town worth while what do they say about me really i want to know of course the ones resent your to anything farther away than they re so suspicious that s it suspicious and some think you dress too well oh they do do shall i dress in to suit them please are you going to be a baby i ll be good you certainly will or i won t tell you one single thing you must understand i m not asking you to change yourself just want you to know what they think you must do that no matter how absurd their prejudices are if you re going to handle them is it your ambition to make this a better town or isn t it i don t know whether it is or not why why tut tut now of course it is why i depend on you you re a born i am not not any more of course you are oh if i really could help so they think i m affected my lamb they do now don t say they re after all standards are as reasonable to as lake shore drive standards are to and there s more than there are or and i ll tell you the whole story they think you re showing off when you say american instead of they think you re too frivolous life s so serious to them that they can t imagine any kind of laughter except s was sure you were her when oh i was not you talked about encouraging reading and mrs elder thought you were when you said she had such a pretty little car she thinks it s an enormous car and some of the merchants say you re too when you talk to them in the store and poor me when i was trying to be friendly every in town is doubtful about your being so with your all right to be kind but they say you act as though she were your cousin wait now there s main street plenty more and they think you were eccentric in furnishing this room they think the broad couch and that are absurd wait i know they re silly and i guess ive heard a dozen e you because you don t go to church oftener and i can t stand it i can t bear to realize that they ve been saying all these things while i ve been going about so happily and liking them i wonder if you ought to have told me it will make me self conscious i wonder the same thing only answer i can get is the old saw about knowledge being power and some day you ll see how absorbing it is to have power even here to control the town on i m a but i do like to see things moving it hurts it makes these people seem so and treacherous when i ve been perfectly natural with them but let s have it all what did they say about my chinese party why go on or i ll make up worse things than anything you can tell me they did enjoy it but i guess some of them felt you were showing off pretending that your husband is richer than he is i can t their meanness of mind is beyond any horrors i could imagine they really thought that i and you want to reform people like that when is so cheap who dared to say that the rich or the poor fairly well can t they at least understand me well enough to see that though i might be affected and at least i simply couldn t commit that other kind of vulgarity if they must know you may tell them with my compliments that will makes about four thousand a year and the party cost half of what they probably thought it did chinese things are not very expensive and i made my own costume stop it i stop beating i know all that what they meant was they felt you were starting dangerous competition by giving a party such as most people here can t afford four thousand is a pretty big income for this town i never thought of starting competition will you believe that it was in all love and friendliness that i tried to give main street them the party i could it was foolish it was childish and noisy but i did mean it so well i know of course and it certainly is unfair of them to make fun of your having that chinese food men was it and to laugh about your wearing those pretty trousers sprang up oh they didn t do that	42
they didn t fun at my feast that i ordered so carefully for them aud my little chinese costume that i was so happy making i made it secretly to surprise them and they ve been it all this while she was huddled on the couch was her hair muttering i shouldn t in shame did not know when slipped away the clock s bell at half past five aroused her i must get hold of myself before will comes i hope he never knows what a fool his wife is frozen horrible hearts like a very small very lonely girl she up stairs slow step by step her feet dragging her hand on the rail it was not her husband to whom she wanted to run for protection it was her father her smiling understanding dead these twelve years in was yawning stretched in the largest chair between the and a small stove cautiously will dear i wonder if the people here don t me sometimes they must i mean if they ever do you mustn t let it bother you you lord i should say not they all keep telling me you re the girl they ever saw well i ve just fancied the merchants probably think i m too about i m afraid i bore mr and mr and mr i can tell you how that is i didn t want to speak of it but since you ve brought it up probably the fact that you got this new furniture down in the cities instead of here i didn t want to raise any objection at the time but after all i make my money here and they naturally expect me to spend it here main street if mr will kindly tell me how any civilized person can furnish a room out of the pieces that he calls she remembered she said meekly but i understand and and oh youve probably handed em a few for the bum stocks they carry when you just meant to jolly em but rats what do we care this is an independent town not like these eastern holes where you have to watch your step all the time and live up to fool demands and social customs and a lot of old always busy everybody s free here to do what he wants to he said it with a flourish and perceived that he believed it she turned her breath of fury into a by the way while we re talking of this of course i like to keep independent and i don t believe in this business of binding yourself to trade with the man that trades with you unless you really want to but same time i d be just as glad if you dealt with or as much as you can instead of who go to dr every last time and the whole tribe of em the same way i don t see why i should be paying out my good money for and having them pass it on to i ve gone to because they re better and i know i don t mean cut them out entirely course is give you short weight and is a old dutch but same time i mean let s keep the trade in the family whenever it is convenient see how i mean i see well guess it s about time to turn in re yawned went out to look at the the door patted her head his waistcoat yawned wound the clock went down to look at the furnace yawned and ed up stairs to bed casually scratching his thick till he aren t you ever coming up to bed she sat chapter ix she had tripped into the meadow to teach the a pretty dance and found that the were wolves there was no way out between their pressing gray shoulders she was surrounded by and eyes she could not go on enduring the hidden derision she wanted to flee she wanted to hide in the generous indifference of cities she practised saying to think perhaps run down to st paul for a few days but she not trust herself to say it carelessly could not abide his certain questioning reform the town all she wanted was to be she could not look directly at people she flushed and before citizens who a week ago had been amusing objects of study and in their good mornings she heard a cruel she encountered at s she oh how do you do heavens what beautiful that is yes doesn t it look fresh harry simply has to have his on sunday the man hastened out of the shop she didn t make fun of me did she in a week she had recovered from consciousness of of shame and whispering but she kept her habit of avoiding people she walked the streets with her head down when she mrs or mrs ahead she crossed over with an elaborate of looking at a always she was acting for the benefit of every one she saw and for the benefit of the eyes which she did not see she perceived that had told the truth whether she entered a store or swept the back porch or stood at the bay window in the living room the village peeped at her once she had swung along the street triumphant in making loo main street a home now she glanced at each house and felt when she was safely home that she had won past a thousand enemies armed with ridicule she told herself that her was preposterous but daily she was thrown into panic she saw curtains slide back into innocent old women who had been entering their houses slipped out again to stare at her in the wintry quiet she could hear them on their when she had for a blessed hour forgotten the when	42
she was through a chill dusk happy in yellow windows against gray night her as she realized that a head covered with a shawl was thrust up over a snow tipped bush to watch her she admitted that she was taking herself too seriously that at every one she became placid and thought fell of her philosophy but next morning she had a shock of shame as she entered s the his clerk and mrs had been about something they halted looked embarrassed about felt guilty that evening when took her to call on the their hosts seemed at their arrival what makes you so hang dog the feebly except sam and there were no merchants of whose welcome was certain she knew that she read mockery into greetings but she could not control her suspicion could not rise from her she alternately raged and at the superiority of the merchants they did not know that they were being rude but they meant to have it understood that they were prosperous and not scared of no doctor s wife they often said one man s as good as another and a sight better this motto however they did not commend to farmer customers who had had crop failures the yankee merchants were and and from the old country wished to be taken for james born in new and born in both proved that they were free american citizens by i don t know whether i got any or not or well you can t expect me to get it delivered by noon it was good form for the customers to fight back cheerfully you have it there by twelve or snatch that fresh delivery boy bald headed but main street loi had never been able to play the game of friendly and now she was certain that she never would learn it she formed the cowardly habit of going to s was not respectable and rude he was still a foreigner and he expected to remain one his manner was heavy and his establishment was more fantastic than any cross roads store no one save himself could find anything a part of the of children s stockings was under a blanket on a shelf a part in a tin snap box the rest heaped like a nest of black cotton upon a which was surrounded by dried for boxes of and a pair and a half of s rubber footed boots the place was crowded with standing aloof in and ancient colored leg o mutton awaiting the return of their lords they spoke or and looked at they were a relief to her they were not whispering that she was a but what she told herself was that s was so picturesque and romantic it was in the matter of clothes that she was most when she dared to go in her new checked suit with the black embroidered collar she had as good as invited all of which interested itself in nothing so intimately as in new clothes and the cost thereof to investigate her it was a smart suit with lines to the dragging yellow and pink of the town the widow s stare from her porch indicated well i never saw anything like that before mrs stopped at the notions shop to hint my that s a nice suit t it terribly expensive the gang of boys in front of the store commented hey play you a game of on that dress could not endure it she drew her fur coat over the suit and hastily fastened the buttons while the boys n no group her quite so much as these staring young t u s she had tried to convince herself that the village with its i main street fresh air its lakes for fishing and swimming was than the artificial city but she was by glimpses of the gang of boys from fourteen to twenty who before s store smoking displaying fancy shoes and purple ties and coats of diamond shaped buttons whistling the and oh you baby doll at every passing girl she saw them playing pool in the room behind s op and shaking in the smoke house and gathered in a to listen to the stories of the of the house she heard them moist lips over every at the palace at the counter of the greek parlor while they ate dreadful of decayed whipped cream and ice cream they screamed to one another hey lone quit dog gone you what you went and done you almost my glass like hell i did hey your hide don t you go sticking your nail in my i scream oh you how like dancing with last night some kid by consultation of american fiction she discovered that this was the only and amusing manner in which boys could function that boys who were not of the and the camp were and unhappy she had taken this for granted she had studied the boys but it had not occurred to her that they might touch her now she was aware that they knew all about her that they were waiting for some affectation over which they could no passed their observation posts more than did mrs dr in shame she knew that they glanced at her snowy about her legs theirs were not young eyes there was no youth in all the town she they were born old grim and old and and she cried again that their youth was and cruel on the day when she overheard and earl n son of the righteous widow who lived across the alley was at this time a boy of fourteen or fifteen had already seen quite enough of on her first evening in had appeared at the head main street of a immensely iq on a discarded his companions were in imitation of had felt rather had gone out and distributed a	42
dollar but was a in he returned with an entirely new group and this time there were three and a rattle when again interrupted his you got to give us two dollars and he got it a week later a to a window of the living room and the out of the darkness frightened into screaming since then in four months she had beheld hanging a cat stealing throwing at the house and making tracks across the lawn and had heard him explaining the mysteries of generation with great and knowledge he was in fact a museum specimen of what a small town a well public school a tradition of hearty humor and a pious mother could produce from the material of a courageous and ingenious mind was afraid of him far from protesting when he set his on a she worked hard at not seeing him the was a shed with paint tools a lawn and ancient of hay above it was a which and earl young brother of harry used as a den for smoking hiding from and planning secret societies they climbed to it by a ladder on the alley side of the shed this morning of late january two or three weeks after s revelations had gone into the stable to find a hammer snow softened her step she heard voices in the above her ah oh go down the lake and some out of somebody s traps was yawning and get our ears beat off i grumbled earl these are member when we were just and used to smoke corn silk and spit silence say earl ma says if you tobacco you get consumption aw rats your old lady is a that s so pause but she says she knows a that did main street aw didn t used to tobacco all the time before he married this here girl from the cities he used to spit some shot he could hit a tree ten feet off this was news to the girl from the cities say how is she continued earl how s who you know who i mean a a of loose boards silence weary from mrs oh she s all right i guess relief to below she a o cake one time but ma says she s stuck up as hell ma s always talking about her ma says if mrs thought as much about the as she does about her clothes the wouldn t look so spit silence s always talking about her too from earl she says mrs thinks she knows it all says she has to laugh till almost every time she sees mrs along the street with that take a look i m a swell skirt way she s got but i don t pay no attention to she s n a ma was telling somebody that she heard that mrs claimed she made forty dollars a week when she was on some job in the cities and ma says she knows that she never made but eighteen a week ma says that when she s lived here a while she won t go round making a fool of herself pulling that stuff on folks that know a whole lot more than she does they re all laughing up their sleeves at her say notice how mrs around the house other evening when i was coming over here she d forgot to pull down curtain and i watched her for ten minutes you d a died laughing she was there all alone and she must a spent five minutes getting a picture straight it was funny as hell the way she d stick out her finger to the see my finger oh my ain t i what a fine long tail my cat s got but say earl she s some good just the same and o the glad rags she must of bought for her wedding notice these low cut dresses and these thin shirts main street she wears i had a good at em when they were out on the line with the and some ankles she s got then fled in her innocence she had not known that the whole town could discuss even her garments her body she felt that she was being dragged naked down main street the moment it was dusk she pulled down the window shades all the shades flush with the sill but beyond them she felt moist eyes in she remembered and tried to forget and remembered more the vulgar detail of her husband s having observed the ancient customs of the land by tobacco she would have preferred a prettier vice gambling or a mistress for these she might have found a luxury of forgiveness she could not remember any wicked hero of fiction who tobacco she asserted that it proved him to be a man of the bold free west she tried to him with the heroes of the motion pictures she curled on the couch a pallid softness in the twilight and fought herself and lost the battle did not identify him with riding the it merely bound him to to the tailor and the but he gave it up for me oh what does it matter we re all filthy in some things i think of myself as so superior but i do eat and i do wash my dirty and scratch i m not a cool slim goddess on a column there aren t any he gave it up for me he stands by me believing that every one loves me he s the rock of ages in a storm of meanness that s driving me mad it will drive me mad all evening she sang scotch to and when she noticed he was an cigar she smiled at his secret she could not escape asking in the exact words and mental which a thousand million women and	42
mischief making queens had used before her and which a million million women will know hereafter was it all a horrible mistake my him she the doubt without answering it io main street iv had taken her north to qui in the big woods it was the entrance to a indian a sandy settlement among pines on the shore of a huge snow glaring lake she had her first sight of his mother except the glimpse at the wedding mrs had a hushed and delicate breeding which dignified her cottage with its worn hard cushions in heavy she had never lost the child s miraculous power of wonder she asked questions about books and cities she murmured will is a dear hard working boy but he s inclined to be too serious and youve taught him how to play last night i heard you both laughing about the old indian basket and i just lay in bed and enjoyed your happiness forgot her misery hunting in this of family life she could depend upon them she was not alone watching mrs about the kitchen she was better able to himself he was matter of fact yes and mature he didn t really play he let play with him but he had his mother s genius for trusting her disdain for her sure integrity from the two days at qui drew confidence in herself and she returned to in a throbbing like those golden seconds when because he is for an instant free from pain a sick man in living a bright hard winter day the wind shrill black and silver clouds across the sky everything in motion during the brief light they struggled against the surf of wind through deep snow was cheerful he hailed behave yourself while i been away the editor b you stayed so long that all your have got and took notes for the about their journey elder cried hey folks how s tricks up north mrs waved to them from her porch they re glad to see us we mean something here these people are satisfied why can t i be but can i sit back all my life and be satisfied with hey folks they want shouts on main street and i want in a room why main street ran in after school a dozen times she was she had about town and plucked compliments mrs dr had pronounced a very sweet bright young woman and the at s store had declared that she was easy to work for and awful easy to look at but could not yet take her in she resented this s knowledge of her shame was not too long she hinted you re a great child buck up now the town s quit you almost entirely come with me to the club they have some of the best papers and current events so interesting in s demands felt a but she was too to obey it was who was really her however charitable toward the lower classes she may have thought herself had been reared to assume that servants belong to a and inferior species but she discovered that was like girls she had loved in college and as a companion altogether superior to the young of the jolly seventeen daily they became more frankly two girls playing at considered the most beautiful and accomplished lady in the country she was always shrieking my dot s a swell hat or ay t ink au ladies die when see how elegant you do your hair but it was not the of a servant nor the of a slave it was the admiration of for junior they made out the day s together though they began with propriety sitting by the kitchen table and at the sink or the stove the conference was likely to end with both of them by the table while over the ice man s attempt to kiss her or admitted everybody knows that the doctor is lots more clever than dr when came in from plunged into the hall to take off her coat rub her hands and ask lots of folks up town today this was the welcome upon which d ended io main street vi through her weeks of there was no change in lier surface life no one save was aware of her on her most despairing days she to women on the street in stores but without the protection of s presence she did not go to the jolly seventeen she delivered herself to the judgment of the town only when she went and on the occasions of formal afternoon calls when mrs or mrs george with clean gloves and minute handkerchiefs and card cases and countenances of frozen approbation sat on the edges of chairs and inquired do you find pleasing when they spent evenings of social profit and loss at the or the she hid behind playing the simple bride now she was had taken a patient to for an operation he would be away for two or three days she had not minded she would the matrimonial and be a fanciful girl for a time but now that he was gone the house was empty was out this afternoon drinking coffee and talking about fellows her cousin it was the day for the monthly supper and evening bridge of the jolly seventeen but dared not go she sat alone chapter x the house was long before evening shadows slipped down the walls and waited behind every chair did that door move no she wouldn t go to the jolly seventeen she hadn t enough to before them to smile at s not today but she did want a party now if some one would come in this afternoon some one who liked her or mrs sam or old mrs or gentle mrs dr or she d no that wouldn t be it they must come	42
but to have him isolated here all his years and so to bed have i found my real level in and kitchen gossip oh i do miss you will but it will be pleasant to over in bed as often as i want to without worrying about waking you up am i really this settled thing called a married woman i feel so unmarried tonight so free to think that there was once a mrs who let herself worry over a town called when there was a whole world outside it of course will is going to like poetry in a black february day clouds of ponderous timber weighing down on the earth an dropping of snow upon the trampled gloom but no of the lines of roofs and sharp and the second day of s absence she fled from the house for a walk it was thirty below too cold to her in the spaces between houses the wind caught her it stung it at nose and ears and aching cheeks and she hastened from shelter to shelter catching her breath in the lee of a barn grateful for the protection of a covered with ragged showing under of green and red the grove of oaks at the end of the street suggested indians hunting snow shoes and she struggled past the earth cottages to the open country to a farm and a low hill with hard snow in her loose coat seal cheeks by lines of village she was as out of place on this dreary as a scarlet on an ice she looked down on the snow stretching without break from streets to ing beyond wiped out the town s of being a shelter the houses were black on a white sheet her heart main street shivered with that still loneliness as her body shivered with the wind she ran back into the of streets all the while protesting that she wanted a city s yellow glare of shop windows and or the primitive forest with and a rifle or a warm and noisy with and cattle certainly not these houses these yards with winter ash piles these roads of dirty snow and frozen mud the zest of winter was gone three months more till may the cold might drag on with the snow ever the weakened body less she wondered why the good citizens insisted on adding the chill of prejudice why they did not make the houses of their spirits more warm and frivolous like the wise of and she the outskirts of the town and viewed the of hollow wherever as many as three houses are gathered there will be a of at least one house in the sam boasted you don t get any of this poverty that you find in cities always plenty of work no need of charity man got to be blame if he don t get ahead but now that the summer mask of leaves and grass was gone discovered misery and dead hope in a of thin boards covered with tar paper she saw the mrs working in gray steam outside her six year old boy wood he had a torn jacket of a blue like milk his hands were covered with red through which his raw he halted to blow on them to cry a family of recently arrived were in an abandoned stable a man of eighty was picking up of coal along the railroad she did not know what to do about it she felt that these independent citizens who had been taught that they belonged to a would resent her trying to play lady she lost her loneliness in the activity of the village the railroad yards with a freight train the wheat oil a slaughter house with blood marks on the snow the with the of farmers and piles of milk an stone hut danger powder stored here the jolly yard where a in a red overcoat whistled as he main street the of granite elder s small mill with the smell of fresh pine and the of circular most important uie flour and company president its windows were with flour dust but it was the most stirring spot in town workmen were barrels of flour into a box car a farmer sitting on of wheat in a argued with the wheat machinery within the mill and water in the ice freed mill race the clatter was a relief to after months of houses she wished that she could work in the mill that she did not belong to the caste of professional she started for home through the small before a tar paper at a gate a man in rough brown coat and black cap with was watching her his square face was confident his was he stood erect his hands in his side pockets his pipe puffing slowly he was forty five or six perhaps how do mrs he she recalled him the town hand who had repaired their furnace at the beginning of winter oh how do you do she fluttered my name s the red they call me remember always thought i d kind of like to say to you again ye yes ive been exploring the outskirts of town fine mess no no street cleaning and the minister and the priest represent the arts and well we tenth down here in hollow are no worse off than you folks thank god we don t have to go and at at the jolly old seventeen the who regarded herself as completely was uncomfortable at being chosen as comrade by a odd job man probably he was one of her husband s but she must keep her dignity yes even the jolly seventeen isn t always so exciting it s very cold again today isn t it well was not respectfully he showed no signs of pulling a his eyebrows moved as though	42
tossed his coat into the lowered himself into the barrel chair and on i m probably a but by i do keep my independence by doing odd and that s more n these polite like the clerks in the banks do when i m rude to some it may be partly because i don t know better and god knows i m not no authority on trick forks and what you wear with a prince but mostly it s because i mean something i m about the only man in johnson county that remembers the in the declaration of independence about americans being supposed to have the right to life liberty and the pursuit of happiness i meet old on the street he looks at me like he wants me to remember he s a and worth two hundred thousand dollars and he says s my name i says he knows my name all ri tee well whatever your name is he says i understand you have a saw i want you to come around and saw up four of for me he says ii main street so you like my looks eh i says kind of innocent what difference does that make want you to saw that wood before saturday he says real sharp common workman going and getting fresh with a fifth of a million dollars all walking around in a hand me down fur coat here s the difference it makes i says just to devil him how do you know i like your maybe he didn t look i says thinking it all over i don t like your application for a loan take it to another bank only there ain t any i says and i walks off on him sure probably i was surly and foolish but i figured there had to be one man in town independent enough to the banker he out of his chair made coffee gave a cup and talked on half defiant and half half wistful for friendliness and half amused by her surprise at the discovery that there was a philosophy at the door she hinted mr if you were i would you worry when people thought you were affected kick em in the face say if i were a sea and all over silver think i d care what a pack of dirty thought about my flying it was not the wind at her back it was the thrust of s scorn which carried her through town she faced cocked her head at s brief nod and came home to radiant she to run over this evening she played the an echo of the red ing philosopher of the tar paper when she hinted to isn t there a man here who himself by being to the village gods some such a name the reform leader said oh yes things he s awfully impertinent iv had returned at midnight at breakfast he said four several times that he had missed her every moment on her way to market sam hailed her the top o the to going to stop and pass the time of day sam l warmer eh what d the s say it main street was say you folks better come round and visit with us one of these evenings don t be so dog gone proud staying by yourselves the wheat at the stopped her in the post office held her hand in his withered peered at her with faded eyes and chuckled you are so fresh and blooming my dear mother was saying t other day that a sight of you was better n a dose of medicine in the bon ton store she found buying a modest gray we haven t seen you for so long she said wouldn t you like to come in and play some evening as though he meant it begged may i while she was two yards of the up to her his long sallow face and he you ve just got to come back to my department and see a pair of patent leather slippers i set aside for you in a manner of more than reverence he her boots tucked her skirt about her ankles slid on the slippers she took them you re a good she said i m not a at all i just like elegant things all this is so he indicated with a waving hand the shelves of shoe boxes the seat of thin wood in the display of shoe trees and tin boxes of the of a young woman with cherry cheeks who proclaimed in the exalted poetry of my never got to what perfection was till i got a pair of clever shoes but sometimes sighed there is a pair of dainty little shoes like these and i set them aside for some one who will appreciate when i saw these i said right away wouldn t it be nice if they fitted mrs and i meant to speak to you first chance i had i haven t forgotten our jolly talks at mrs s that evening came in and thou instantly impressed him into a game was h again i main street she did not in recovering something of her forget her determination to begin the of by the easy and agreeable of teaching to enjoy reading poetry in the the campaign was delayed twice he suggested that they call on neighbors once he was in the the fourth evening he yawned pleasantly stretched and inquired well what ll we do tonight shall we go to the i know exactly what we re going to do now don t ask questions come and sit down by the table there are you lean back and forget you re a practical man and listen to me it may be that she had been influenced by the certainly she sounded as though she was selling culture but she	42
dropped it when she sat on the couch her chin in her hands a volume of on her knees and read aloud instantly she was released from the homely comfort of a town she was in the world of lonely things the flutter of twilight the aching call of along a shore to which the foam crept out of darkness the island of and the elder gods and the eternal glories that never were tall kings and women with gold the incessant and the dr she she remembered that he was the sort of person who tobacco she glared while he uneasily that s great stuff study it in college i like poetry fine james and some of this i wish i could appreciate that art but i guess i m too old a dog to learn new tricks with pity for his bewilderment and a certain desire to she consoled him then let s try some you ve read him you bet read him in school there s that and let there be no what is it of farewell when i put out to sea but let the main street well i don t remember all of it but oh sure and there s that i met a little boy who i don t remember exactly how it goes but the chorus ends up we are seven yes well shall we try the of the king they re so full of color go to it shoot but he hastened to shelter himself behind a cigar she was not transported to she read with an eye cocked on him and when she saw how much he was suffering she ran to him kissed his forehead cried you poor forced rose that wants to be a decent look here now that ain t anyway i sha n t torture you any longer she could not quite give up she read with a great deal of emphasis there s a regiment a coming down the grand trunk road he tapped his foot to the he looked normal and reassured but when he her that was fine i don t know but what you can just as good as she the book and suggested that they were not too late for the nine o clock show at the that was her last effort to harvest the april wind to teach divine by a correspondence course to buy the lilies of and the of in tin at s but the fact is that at the motion pictures she discovered herself laughing as heartily as at the humor of an actor who stuffed down a woman s evening frock for a second she her laughter mourned for the day when on her hill by the she had walked the with queens but the celebrated s conceit of dropping into a soup plate flung her into unwilling and the faded the dead queens fled through darkness vi she went to the jolly seventeen s afternoon bridge she had learned the elements of the game from the sam main street she played quietly and reasonably badly she had no opinions on more than suits a topic on which mrs for five minutes she smiled frequently and was the complete bird in her manner of thanking the hostess mrs her only anxious period was during the conference on husbands the young discussed the of with a frankness and a which dismayed communicated harry s method of and his interest in deer shooting mrs reported fully and with some irritation her husband s of liver and bacon s quoted a recent with him in regard to christian science and the sewing of buttons upon announced that she simply wasn t going to stand his always girls when he went and got crazy jealous if a man just danced with her and rather more than s varieties of kisses so meekly did give attention so obviously was she at last desirous of being one of them that they looked on her fondly and encouraged her to give such details of her as might be of interest she was embarrassed rather than she deliberately misunderstood she talked of s and medical till they were thoroughly bored they regarded her as agreeable but green till the end she labored to satisfy the she at the president of the club that she wanted to entertain them only she said i don t know that i can give you any as nice as mrs s or that simply delicious angel s food we had at your house dear fine we need a hostess for the of march wouldn t it be awfully original if you made it a st s day bridge i ll be to death to help you with it i m glad you ve learned to play bridge at first i didn t hardly know if you were going to like isn t it that you ve settled down to being with us maybe we aren t as as the cities but we do have the times and oh we go swimming in summer and dances and oh lots of good times if folks will just take us as we are think we re a pretty good bunch main street i m of it thank you so much for the idea about having a st s day bridge oh that s nothing i always think the jolly seventeen are so good at original ideas if you knew these other towns and and all you d find out and realize that g p is the town in the state did you know that the famous came from here and yes i think that a st s day party would be awfully cunning and original and yet not too queer or or anything chapter xi she had often been invited to the weekly meetings of the the women s study club but she had put it off the	42
was promised such a group and yet it puts you in touch with all the intellectual thoughts that are going on everywhere early in march mrs wife of the physician marched into s room like an amiable old and suggested my dear you really must come to the this afternoon mrs is going to be leader and the poor soul is frightened to death she wanted me to get you to come she says she s sure you will up the meeting with your knowledge of books and writings english poetry is our topic today so put on your coat english poetry really i d love to go i didn t realize you were reading poetry oh we re not so slow mrs wife of the richest man in town at them when they appeared her expensive frock of colored satin with rows and of solemn brown beads was intended for a woman twice her size she stood wringing her hands in front of nineteen folding chairs in her front parlor with its faded photograph of falls in its colored of mr its lamp painted with cows and mountains and standing on a marble column she o mrs i m in such a fix i m supposed to lead the discussion and i wondered would you come and help what poet do you take up today demanded in her library tone of what book do you wish to take why the english ones not all of them w why yes we re learning all of european literature main street this year the club gets such a nice magazine culture hints and we follow its last year our subject was men and women of the bible and next year we ll probably take up and china my it does make a body to keep up with all these new culture subjects but it is improving so will you help us with the discussion today on her way over had decided to use the as the tool with which to the town she had immediately conceived enormous enthusiasm she had these are the real people when the who bear the burdens are interested in poetry it means something i ll work with for them anything her enthusiasm had become watery even before thirteen women resolutely removed their sat down ate their folded their hands composed lower thoughts and invited the naked muse of poetry to deliver her most improving message they had greeted affectionately and she tried to be a daughter to them but she felt her chair was out in the open exposed to their gaze and it was a hard slippery church parlor chair likely to publicly and without warning it was impossible to sit on it without folding the hands and listening she wanted to kick the chair and run it would make a magnificent clatter she saw that was watching her she pinched her wrist as though she were a noisy child in church and when she was decent and cramped again she list mrs opened the meeting by sighing i m sure i m glad to see you all here today and i understand that the ladies have prepared a number of very interesting papers this is such an interesting subject the poets they have been an inspiration for higher thought in fact wasn t it reverend who said that some of the poets have been as much an inspiration as a good many of the ministers and so we shall be glad to hear the poor lady smiled panted with fright about the small oak table to find her eye glasses and continued we will first have the pleasure of hearing mrs on the subject shakespeare and milton mrs said that shakespeare was born in and died he lived in london england and in main street on which many american loved to visit a lovely town with many and old houses well worth examination many people believed that shakespeare was the greatest who ever lived also a fine poet not much was known about his life but after all that did not really make so much difference because they loved to read his numerous plays several of the best known of which she would now perhaps the best known of his plays was the merchant of having a beautiful love story and a fine appreciation of a woman s brains which a woman s club even those who did not care to commit themselves on the question of ought to appreciate laughter mrs was sure that she for one would love to be like the play was about a jew named and he didn t want his daughter to marry a gentleman named mrs a slender gray nervous woman president of the and wife of the reported the birth and death dates of scott burns and wound up burns was quite a poor boy and he did not enjoy the advantages we enjoy today except for the advantages of the fine old scotch where he heard the word of god preached more than even in the finest big brick churches in the big and so called advanced cities of today but he did not have our advantages and latin and the other treasures of the mind so richly strewn before the alas too feet of our youth who do not always sufficiently appreciate the privileges freely granted to every american boy rich or poor burns had to work hard and was sometimes led by evil companionship into low habits but it is morally instructive to know that he was a good student and educated himself in striking contrast to the loose ways and so called aristocratic society life of lord on which i have just spoken and certainly though the lords and of his day may have looked down upon burns as a humble person many of us have greatly enjoyed his pieces about the mouse and other rustic subjects with their message of	42
humble beauty i am so sorry i have not got the time to quote some of them mrs george gave ten minutes to and mrs a faced curiously sweet woman so main street awed by her that wanted to kiss her completed the day s grim task by a paper on other poets the other poets worthy of consideration were gray mrs and miss obliged with a recital of the and from by request she gave an old sweetheart of mine as had finished the poets it was ready for the next week s labor english fiction and essays mrs now we will have a discussion of the papers and i am sure we shall all enjoy hearing from one who we hope to have as a new member mrs who with her splendid literary training and all should be able to give us many and many had warned herself not to be so she had insisted that in the quest of these work stained women was an which ought to stir her tears but they re so self satisfied they think they re doing a favor they don t believe they have a quest they re sure that they have culture and hung up it was out of this stupor of doubt that mrs s summons roused her she was in a panic how could she speak without them mrs leaned over to stroke her hand and whisper you look tired don t you talk unless you want to affection she was on her feet searching for words and the only thing in the way of suggestion i know you are following a definite but i do wish that now you ve had such a splendid introduction instead of going on with some other subject next year you return and take up the poets more in detail especially actual even though their lives are so interesting and as mrs said so morally instructive and perhaps there are several poets not mentioned today whom it might be worth while considering for instance and and and would be such a well that is such a contrast to life as we all enjoy it in our beautiful she saw that mrs was not with her she captured her by innocently continuing main street unless perhaps to be more than you than we really like what do you think mrs the s wife decided why youve caught my very thoughts mrs of course i have never read but years ago when he was in i remember mr saying that or was it but anyway he said that though many so called intellectual people posed and pretended to find beauty in there can never be genuine beauty without the message from the heart but at the same time i do think you have an excellent idea and though we have talked about and china as the probable subject for next year i believe that it would be nice if the committee would try to work in another day entirely devoted to english poetry in fact madame i so move you when mrs s coffee and angel s food had helped them to recover from the depression caused by thoughts of shakespeare s death they all told that it was a pleasure to have her with them the committee retired to the sitting room for three minutes and elected her a member and she stopped being she wanted to be one of them they were so loyal and kind it was they who would carry out her her campaign against village was actually begun on what specific reform should she first loose her army during the gossip after the meeting mrs george remarked that the city hall seemed inadequate for the splendid modern mrs timidly v that the young people could have free dances there the lodge dances were so exclusive the city hall that was it hurried home she had not realized that was a city from she discovered that it was organized with a mayor and city council and wards she was delighted by the simplicity of one s self a metropolis why not she was a proud and patriotic citizen all evening ii she examined the city hall next morning she had remembered it only as a bleak she found it n main street a liver colored frame half a block from main street the front was an wall of and dirty windows it had an view of a vacant lot and s tailor shop it was larger than the carpenter shop beside it but not so well built no one was about she walked into the corridor on one side was the court like a country school on the other the room of the fire company with a ford cart and the ornamental used in at the end of the hall a filthy two cell jail now empty but smelling of and ancient sweat the whole second story was a large unfinished room with piles of folding chairs a lime mortar mixing box and the of fourth of july covered with plaster and faded red white and blue at the end was an stage the room was large enough for the community dances which mrs but was after something bigger than dances in the afternoon she to the public library the library was open three and four evenings a we it was in an old dwelling sufficient but caught herself pleasanter chairs for children an art collection a young enough to experiment she herself stop this fever of everything i will be satisfied with the library the city hall is enough for a beginning and it s really an excellent library it s it isn t so bad is it possible that i am to find and stupidity in every human activity i encounter in schools and business and government and everything is there never any contentment never any rest she shook her head	42
as though she were shaking off water and hastened into the library a young light amiable presence modest in fur coat blue suit fresh collar and tan boots from snow miss stared at her and i was so sorry not to see you at the yesterday said you might come oh you went to the did you enjoy it so much such good papers on the poets lied resolutely but i did think they should have had you give one of the papers on poetry well of course i m not one of the bunch that seem to i main street have the time to take and run the and if they prefer to have papers on literature by other ladies who have no literary training after all why should i complain what am i but a city you re not you re the one person that does that does oh you do so much tell me is there who are the people who control the club miss emphatically stamped a date in the front of frank on the lower for a small boy at him as though she were stamping a warning on his brain and sighed i wouldn t put myself forward or any one for the world and is one of my best friends and such a splendid teacher and there is no one in town more advanced and interested in all movements but i must say that no matter who the president or the are seems to be behind them all the time and though she is always telling me about what she is pleased to call my fine work in the library i notice that i m not often called on for papers though mrs once volunteered and told me that she thought my paper on the of england was the most paper we had the year we took up english and french travel and architecture but and of course mrs and mrs are very important in the club as you might expect of the wives of the of schools and the and indeed they are both very but no you may regard me as entirely unimportant i m sure what i say doesn t matter a bit you re much too modest and i m going to tell so and i wonder if you can give me just a bit of your time and show me where the magazine are kept she had won she was escorted to a room like a grandmother s where she discovered devoted to house and town planning with a six year file of the national miss left her alone humming fluttering pages with delighted fingers sat cross legged on the floor the magazines in heaps about her she found pictures of new england streets the dignity of the charm of and and avenue the fairy of forest hills on long island cottages and and a high street and port sunlight the village main street an chased jewel box a town in which had changed itself from the barren brick fronts and frame sheds of a main street to a way which led the eye down a vista of and gardens assured that she was not quite mad in her belief that a small american town might be lovely as well as useful in buying wheat and selling she sat brooding her thin fingers playing a on her cheeks she saw in a city hall warm brick walls with white shutters a a wide hall and stair she saw it the common home and inspiration not only of the town but of the country about it should contain the court room she couldn t get herself to put in a jail public library a collection of excellent prints rest room and model kitchen for lecture room free community farm forming about it and influenced by it as villages gathered about the castle she saw a new town as graceful and beloved as or that to which washington rode all this the club was to accomplish with no whatever since its several husbands were the of business and politics she was proud of herself for this practical view she had taken only half an hour to change a wire plot into a walled rose garden she hurried out to mrs as president of the of the miracle which had been worked m at a quarter to three had left home at half past four she had created the town at a quarter to five she was in the dignified poverty of the her enthusiasm upon mrs like summer rain upon an old gray roof at two minutes to five a town of and windows had been erected and at two minutes past five the entire town was as flat as erect in a black william and mary chair against gray and brown volumes of sermons and and upon long pine shelves her neat black shoes firm on a rag rug herself as correct and low toned main street as her background mrs listened without comment till was quite through then answered delicately yes i think you draw a very nice picture of what might easily come to pass some day i have no doubt that such villages will be found on the some day but if i might make just the least little criticism it seems to me that you are wrong in supposing either that the city hall would be the proper start or that tiie would be the right instrument after all it s the churches isn t it that are the real heart of the community as you may possibly know my husband is prominent in circles all through the state for his of church union he hopes to see all the joined in one strong body opposing and christian science and properly guiding all movements that make for morality and here the combined churches could afford a splendid club	42
listening to mrs s of how many thousands of farmers wives used the rest room every year and how much they appreciated the kindness of the ladies in providing them with this lovely place and all free she thou t kindness nothing the kind ladies husbands get the farmers trade this is mere commercial accommodation and it s horrible it ought to be the most charming room in town to comfort women sick of certainly it ought to have a clear window so that they can see the life go by some day i m going to make a better rest room a club room why i ve already planned that as part of my town hall so it chanced that she was against the peace of the at her third meeting which covered russian and polish literature with remarks by mrs on the sinful of the russian so called church even before the entrance of the coffee and hot rolls seized on mrs the kind and woman who gave historic dignity to the modem of the she poured out her plans mrs nodded and s hand but at the end she sighed i wish i could agree with you i m sure you re one of the lord s even if we don t see you at the church as often as we d like to but i m afraid you re too tender hearted when and i came here we it with an ox cart from centre to and there was nothing here then but a and a few soldiers and some log when we wanted salt pork and we sent out a man on horseback and probably main street he was shot dead by the before he got back we ladies of course we were all farmers at first we didn t expect any rest room in those days my we d have thought the one they have now was simply elegant my house was with hay and it something terrible when it rained only dry place was under a shelf and when the town grew up we thought the new city hall was real fine and i don t see any need for dance halls dancing isn t what it was anyway we used to dance modest and we had just as much fun as all these young folks do now with their terrible turkey and and all but if they must neglect the lord s that young girls ought to be modest then i guess they manage pretty well at the k p hall and the even if some of the don t always welcome a lot of these foreigners and hired help to all their dances and i certainly don t see any need of a farm or this domestic science demonstration you talk about in my day the boys learned to farm by honest and every could cook or her ma learned her how across her knee besides ain t there a county agent at he comes here once a fortnight maybe that s enough with this scientific farming says there s nothing to it anyway and as for a lecture hall haven t we got the churches good deal better to listen to a good fashioned sermon than a lot of geography and books and things that nobody needs to know more n enough heathen learning right here in the and as for trying to make a whole town in this architecture you talk about i do love nice things to this day i run ribbons into my even if does laugh at me the old villain but just the same i don t believe any of us old would like to see the town that we worked so hard to build being tore down to make a place that wouldn t look like nothing but some dutch and not a bit like the place we loved and don t you think it s sweet now all the trees and and such houses and hot water heat and electric lights and and walks and everything why i thought everybody from the twin cities always said it was such a beautiful town herself declared that had the color of and the of main street yet the next afternoon she was on mrs the hook of the owner of the flour mill mrs s parlor belonged to the crammed school as mrs s belonged to the bare it was furnished on two principles first everything must resemble something else a had a back like a a near leather seat cloth and arms like scotch lions with and spear points on unexpected portions of the chair the second principle of the crammed school was that every inch of the interior must be filled with useless objects the walls of mrs s parlor were with pictures pictures of trees and church on christmas eve with a the building in portraits of indian chiefs of no tribe in particular a poetic motto a yard of roses and the of the institutions attended by the two sons falls business college and university one small square table contained a card of painted china with a rim of wrought and gilded lead a family bible grant s the latest novel by mrs porter a wooden model of a which was also a bank for a polished alone shell holding one black headed pin and one empty a velvet pin cushion in a gilded metal with of n y stamped on the toe and an red glass dish which had mrs s first remark was i must show you all my pretty things and art objects she after s appeal i see you think the new england villages and houses are so much more cunning than these towns i m glad you feel that way you ll be interested to know i was born in and don t you think we ought to	42
try to make my gracious no i we can t afford it taxes are much too high as it is we ought to and not let the city council spend another cent don t you think that was a grand paper mrs read about i was so glad she pointed out how all his silly ideas failed w t mrs said was what said that evening main street not in twenty years would the council propose or vote the funds for a new city hall had avoided exposing her plans to she was shy of the big sister manner would either laugh at her or snatch the idea and change it to suit herself but there was no other hope when came in to tea her was soothing but decisive my dear you re all off i would like to see it a real place to shut out the but it can t be done what could the accomplish their husbands are the most important men in town they are the town but the town as a separate is not the of the if you knew the trouble we had in getting the city council to spend the money and cover the station with vines whatever you may think of women they re twice as as the men but can t the men see the they don t think it s ugly and how can you prove it matter of taste why should they like what a boston likes what they like is to sell well why not an the point is that you have to work from the inside with what we have rather than from the outside with foreign ideas the shell ought not to be forced on the spirit it can t be the bright shell has to grow out of the spirit and express it that means waiting if we keep after the city for another ten years they may vote the bonds for a new school i refuse to believe that if they saw it the big men would be too tight to spend a few dollars each for a building think dancing and lectures and plays all done co you mention the word co to the merchants and they ll you the one thing they fear more than houses is that farmers co movements may get started the secret that lead to scared pocket books always main street in everything and i don t have any of the fine of fiction the and speeches by i m merely blocked by stupidity oh i know i m a fool i dream of and i live in and because the northern seas aren t tender colored but at least they sha n t keep me from loving and sometime i ll run away all right no more she out her hands in a gesture of vi early may wheat springing up in blades like grass corn and potatoes being planted the land humming for two days there had been steady rain even in town the roads were a of mud hideous to view and difficult to cross main street was a black swamp from to on residence streets the grass beside the walks gray water it was hot yet the town was barren under the bleak sky softened neither by snow nor by waving boughs the houses and revealed in their as she dragged homeward looked with at her day loaded the hem of her skirt she passed s dark red house she a yellow pool this was not her home she insisted her home and her beautiful town existed in her mind they had already been created the task was done what she really had been was some one to share them with her would not could not some one to share her refuge suddenly she was thinking of she dismissed him he was too cautious she needed a spirit as and unreasonable as her own and she would never find it youth would never come singing she was beaten yet that same evening she had an idea which solved the of within ten minutes she was the old fashioned of mrs opened the door and peered doubtfully about the edge of it kissed her cheek and into the sitting room well you re a sight for sore chuckled mr main street dropping his newspaper pushing his spectacles back on his forehead you seem so excited sighed mrs i am mr aren t you a he cocked his head and well i guess if i in on all my and farm and my interests in iron on the and in northern timber and cut over lands i could push two million dollars pretty close and i ve made every cent of it by hard work and having the sense to not go out and spend every i think i want most of it from you the glanced at each other in appreciation of the jest and he you re worse than reverend he don t hardly ever strike me for more than ten dollars at a time i m not joking i mean it your children in the cities are grown up and well to do you don t want to die and leave your name why not do a big original thing why not the whole town get a great and have him plan a town that would be suitable to the perhaps he d create some entirely new form of architecture then tear down all these buildings mr had decided that she really did mean it he why that would cost at least three or four million dollars but you alone just one man have two of those millions me spend all my hard earned cash on building houses for a lot of beggars that never had the sense to save their money not that i ve ever been mean could always have a hired girl to do the work	42
the campaign and the responsibility for the rest room to say nothing of the fact that we ve talked of trying to get the railroad to put in a park at the station i think so too said madam she glanced uneasily at miss but what do you think smiled at each of the committee and announced well i don t believe we d better start anything more right now but it s been a privilege to hear s dear generous ideas hasn t it oh there is one thing we must decide on at once we must get together and oppose any move on the part of the clubs to elect another state president from the twin cities and this mrs they re putting forward i know there are people who think she s a t interesting speaker but i regard her as very shallow what do you say to my writing to the lake club telling them that if their district will port mrs for second vice president we ll support their mrs and such a dear lovely cultivated woman too for president yes we ought to show up those folks said and oh by the way we must this movement of mrs s to have the state clubs come out definitely in favor of woman women haven t any place in politics they would lose all their and charm if they became involved in these plots and log rolling and all this awful political stuff about scandal and and so on all save one they interrupted the formal main street business meeting to discuss mrs s husband mrs s income mrs s mrs s residence mrs s style mrs s evening coat mrs s and mrs s altogether influence on the state of women s clubs before the committee they took three minutes to decide which of the subjects suggested by the magazine culture hints and china or the bible as literature would be better for the coming year there was one incident mrs dr interfered and showed off again she commented don t you think that we already get enough of the bible in our churches and sunday schools mrs somewhat out of order but much more out of temper cried well upon my didn t suppose there was any one who felt that we could get enough of the bible i guess if the grand old book has the attacks of for these two thousand years it is worth our slight consideration oh i didn t mean begged inasmuch as she did mean it was hard to be extremely but i wish instead of ourselves either to the bible or to anecdotes about the brothers adam s which culture hints seems to regard as the significant point about furniture we could study some of the really stirring ideas that are springing up today whether it s or or labor problems the things that are going to mean so terribly much everybody cleared her polite throat madam inquired is there any other discussion will some one make a motion to adopt the suggestion of to take up and china it was adopted murmured as she held up her hand had she actually believed that she could plant a seed of in the blank wall of how had she fallen into the folly of trying to plant anything whatever in a wall so smooth and sun and so satisfying to b within chapter xii one week of spring one rare sweet week of may one tranquil moment between the blast of winter and the charge of daily walked from town into with new life one enchanted hour she returned to youth and a belief in the possibility of beauty she had walked toward the upper shore of lake taking to the railroad track whose and make it the natural highway for on the plains she stepped from tie to tie in long strides at each road crossing she had to crawl over a cattle guard of sharpened she walked the rails with arms extended cautious heel before toe as she lost her body bent over her arms wildly and when she she laughed aloud the thick grass beside the track coarse and with many hid yellow and the and sage green coats of the flowers the branches of the brush were red and smooth as on a bowl she ran down the smiled at children gathering flowers in a little basket thrust a handful of the soft flowers into the bosom of her white fields of springing wheat drew her from the straight propriety of the railroad and she crawled through the rusty wire fence she followed a between low wheat blades and a field of which showed silver lights as it flowed before the wind she found a pasture by the lake so sprinkled was the pasture with rag baby blossoms and the of indian tobacco that it spread out like a rare old carpet of cream and rose and delicate green under her feet the rough grass made a pleasant sweet winds blew from the sunny lake beside her and small waves on the shore she leaped a tiny creek in willow main street she was a frivolous grove of and and wild trees the foliage had the of a the green and silver trunks were as candid as the as slender and as the limbs of a the cloudy white blossoms of the trees filled the grove with a which gave an illusion of distance she ran into the wood crying out for joy of freedom regained after winter choke cherry blossoms her from the outer sun warmed spaces to depths of green stillness where a light came through the leaves she walked along an abandoned road she found a beside a covered log at the end of the road she saw the open acres dipping rolling fields bright with wheat i believe the gods still	42
with a of broken down chairs tables on wooden walls and they were so thin walled and so close together that you could and did hear a baby being in the fifth cottage off but they were set among elms and on a bluff which looked across the lake to fields of wheat sloping up to green woods here the forgot social and sat in or in old bathing suits surrounded by hysterical children they for hours joined them she shrieking small boys and helped babies for unfortunate she liked and when she helped them make supper for the men who came out from town each evening she was easier and more natural with them in the debate as to whether there should be loaf or egg on she had no chance to be and they danced sometimes in the evening they had a show with good as end man always they were encircled by children wise in the lore of and and and willow if they could have continued this normal life would have been the most enthusiastic citizen of she was relieved to be assured that she did not want conversation alone that she did not expect the town to become a she was content now she did not but in september when the year was at its richest custom dictated that it was time to return to town to remove the children from the waste occupation of learning the earth and send them back to lessons about the number of potatoes which in a delightful world by commission houses or in freight cars william sold to john the women iso main street who had cheerfully gone bathing all summer looked doubtful when begged let s keep up an life this winter let s slide and their hearts shut again till spring and the nine months of and and dainty began all over ni had started a since and were her only lions and since would have preferred sam to all the poets and in the entire world her private and self did not get beyond one evening dinner for and on her first wedding and that dinner did not get beyond a regarding s was the person die had found here he spoke of her new and cream frock naturally not he held her chair for her as they sat down to dinner and he did not like interrupt her to shout oh say speaking of that i heard a good story today but was he sat late and talked hard and did not come again then she met in the post office and decided that in the history of the was the for for all of america we have lost their she told herself we must restore the last of the to power and follow them on the backward path to the integrity of to the gaiety of dancing in a saw mill she read in die records of the that only sixty years ago not so far back as the birth of her own father four had composed the log which mrs was to find when she in was built afterward by the soldiers as a against the the four were inhabited by who had come up the to st paul and driven north over virgin into virgin woods they ground their own corn the men folks shot ducks and and chickens the new yielded the which they ate raw and boiled and baked and raw again for treat they had wild and apples and tiny wild main street came darkening the sky and in an hour ate the s garden and the farmer s coat precious horses painfully brought from were drowned in or by the fear of snow blew through the of new made and eastern children with muslin dresses shivered all winter and in summer were red and black with indians were everywhere they in stalked into to demand came with across their backs into and begged to see the pictures in the of the children and the found of killed fifty a hundred in a day yet it was a life read in the admirable called old rail fence corners the of mrs black who settled in in there was nothing to parade over in those days we took it as it came and had happy lives we would all gather together and in about two minutes would be having a good time cards or dancing we used to w and dance dances none of these new and not wear any clothes to speak of we covered our hides in those days no tight skirts like now you could take three or four steps inside our skirts and then not reach the edge one of the boys would fiddle a while and then some one would spell him and he could get a dance sometimes they would dance and fiddle too she reflected that if she could not have of gray and rose and crystal she wanted to be swinging across a floor with a dancing this in between town which had exchanged money for grinding out it was neither the heroic old nor the new couldn t she somehow some yet how turn it back to simplicity she herself knew two of the the was the at the grain he weighed of wheat on a rough platform scale in the cracks of which the every spring between times he in the dusty peace of his office she called on the at their rooms above s when they were already old they had lost the money main street which they had invested in an they had given up their beloved yellow brick house and moved into these rooms over a store which were the equivalent of a flat a broad led from the street to the upper hall along which were the doors of a lawyer s office a s a s the lodge rooms of the	42
more interested in than the jolly seventeen but also in i ll with them or slide or throw just as gladly as talk with you oh no yes but they want to stay home and perhaps i m not defending the town it s merely i m a confirmed of myself probably i m conceited about my lack of conceit anyway isn t particularly bad it s like all villages in all countries most places that have lost the smell of earth but not yet acquired the smell of or of factory smoke are just as suspicious and righteous i wonder if the small town isn t with some lovely exceptions a social some day these dull market towns may be as as i can imagine the farmer and his local store manager going by at the end of the day into a city more charming than any william music a university clubs for like me lord how i d like to have a real club she asked you why do you stay here i have the village it dangerous it is more dangerous than the that will certainly get me at fifty unless i stop this smoking the village is the which it s like the hook worm it is main street ambitious people who stay too long in the provinces you ll find it among lawyers and doctors and and college bred merchants all these people who have had a glimpse of the world that and laughs but have returned to their swamp i m a perfect example but i sha n t you with my you won t and do sit down so i can see you he dropped into the shrieking desk chair he looked at her she was conscious of the pupils of his eyes of the fact that he was a man and lonely they were embarrassed they glanced away and were relieved as he went on the of my village is single enough i was born in an town about the same size as and much less friendly it d had more generations in which to form an of respectability here a stranger is taken in if he is correct if he likes hunting and and god and our there we didn t take in even our own till we had contemptuously got used to them it was a town and the trees made it damp and it of rotten apples the country wasn t like our lakes and there were small corn fields and brick yards and greasy oil wells i went to a college and learned that since the bible and a perfect race of ministers to explain it god has never done much but creep around and try to catch us it from college i went to new york to the law school and for four years i lived oh i won t about new york it was dirty and noisy and breathless and ghastly expensive but con red with the academy in which i had been smothered i went to twice a week i saw and and and from the top gallery i walked in park and i read oh everything through a cousin i learned was sick and needed a partner i came here got well he didn t like my way of five hours and then doing my work really not so badly in one we parted when i first came here i swore i d keep up my interests very lofty i read and went to for the i thought i was keeping up but i guess the village had me already i was reading four copies of main street is cheap fiction magazines to one poem i d put the till i simply had to go there on a lot of legal matters a few years ago i was talking to a patent lawyer from and i realized that i d always felt so superior to people like but i saw that i was as provincial and behind the times as worse through the literary and the outlook faithfully while i m turning over pages of a book by charles that i already know by heart i decided to leave here stern resolution grasp the world then i found that the village had me absolute i didn t want to face new streets and younger men real competition it was too easy to go on making out and arguing cases so that s all of the biography of a living dead man except the last chapter the lies about my having been a tower of strength and legal wisdom which some day a preacher will spin over my lean dry body he looked down at his table desk the she could not comment she pictured herself running across the room to pat his hair she saw that his lips were firm under his soft faded she sat still and i know the village perhaps it will get me some day i m going oh no matter at least i am making you talk usually you have to be polite to my but now i m sitting at your feet it would be rather nice to have you literally sitting at my feet by a fire would you have a fireplace for me naturally please don t me now let the old man how old are you twenty six twenty six i was just leaving new york at twenty six i heard sing at twenty six and now i m forty seven i feel like a child yet i m old enough to be your father so it s decently paternal to imagine you curled at my feet of course i hope it isn t but well reflect the morals of by announcing that it is these standards that you and i live up to there s one thing that s the matter with at least with the ruling	42
class there is a ruling class despite all our professions of is main street and the penalty we rulers pay is that our subjects watch us every minute we can t get drunk and we have to be so correct about sex morals and clothes and doing our commercial only in the ways that none of us can live up to it and we become horribly the widow of fiction can t help being h i the themselves demand iti they admire his and look at me suppose i did dare to make love to some exquisite married woman i wouldn t admit it to myself i with the most over la when i get hold of one in yet i shouldn t even try to hold your hand i m broken it s the historical saxon way of making life miserable oh my dear i haven t talked to anybody about myself and all our selves for years can t we do something with the town really no we can t i he disposed of it like a judge ruling out an improper objection returned to matters less energetic curious most troubles are unnecessary we have nature beaten we can make her grow wheat we can keep warm when she sends so we raise the devil just for pleasure wars politics race labor here in we ve cleared the fields and become soft so we make ourselves unhappy at great expense and exertion the man with the laughing at the man with the the worst is the commercial hatred the feeling that any man who doesn t deal with him is him what hurts me is that it applies to lawyers and doctors and decidedly to their wives as much as to the doctors you know about that how your husband and and dislike one another no i won t admit it he grinned oh maybe once or twice when will has positively known of a case where doctor where one of the others has continued to call on longer than necessary he has laughed about it but he still grinned no really and when you say the wives of the doctors share these mrs and i haven t any main street particular crush on each other she s so stolid but her mother mrs nobody could be sweeter yes i m sure she s very bland but i wouldn t tell her my heart s secrets if i were you my dear i insist that there s only one professional man s wife in this town who doesn t plot and that is you you blessed i won t be i i won t believe that medicine the of healing can be turned into a penny picking business see here hasn t ever hinted to you that you d better be nice to some old woman because she tells her friends which doctor to call in but i t to she remembered certain remarks which had offered regarding the widow she looked at he sprang up strode to her with a nervous step smoothed her hand she wondered if she ought to be offended by his caress then she wondered if he liked her hat the new oriental of rose and silver he dropped her hand his elbow brushed her shoulder he flitted over to the desk chair his thin back stooped he picked up the across it he peered at her with such loneliness that she was startled but his eyes faded into as he talked of the of he stopped himself with a sharp good lord you re not a jury you are within your legal rights in refusing to be subjected to this up i m a tedious old fool the obvious while you re the spirit of rebellion tell me your side what is to you a bore can i help how could you i don t know perhaps by listening i haven t done that tonight but can t i be the of the old french plays the maid with the mirror and the loyal ears oh what is there to confide the people are and proud of it and even if i liked you i couldn t talk to you without twenty old watching whispering but you will come talk to me once in a while i m not sure that i shall i m trying to develop my own i o main street large capacity for and contentment ive failed at every positive thing ive tried i d better settle down as they call it and be satisfied to be nothing don t be cynical it hurts me in you it s like blood on the wing of a humming bird i m not a humming bird i m a hawk a tiny hawk f to death by these large white but i am grateful to you for me in the faith and i m going home please stay and have some coffee with me i d like to but they ve succeeded in me i m afraid of what people might say i m not afraid of that i m only afraid of what you might say he stalked to her took her hand you have been happy here tonight yes i m begging she squeezed his hand quickly then snatched hers away she had but little of the curiosity of the and none of the s joy in if she was the girl was the clumsy boy he about the office he his fists into his pockets he stammered i i i oh the devil why do i awaken from smooth to this jagged i ll make i m going to trot down the hall and bring in the and we ll all have coffee or something the yes really quite a decent young pair and his wife he s a just come to town they live in	42
a room behind his office same as i do here they don t know much of anybody i ve heard of them and i ve never thought to call i m horribly ashamed do bring them she stopped for no very clear reason but his expression said her faltering admitted that they wished they had never mentioned the with enthusiasm he said splendid i will from the door he glanced at her curled in the leather chair he slipped out came back with dr and mrs the four of them drank rather bad coffee which made on a they laughed and spoke of and were and started for home through the november wind chapter xiv she was marching home no i couldn t fall in love with him i like him very much but he s too much of a could i kiss him no no at twenty six i could have kissed him then maybe even if i were married to some one else and probably i d have been in persuading myself that it wasn t really wrong the amazing thing is that i m not more amazed at myself i the virtuous young matron am i to be trusted if the prince charming came a married a year and yearning for a prince charming like a of sixteen they say that marriage is a magic change but i m not changed but no i wouldn t want to fall in love even if the prince did come i wouldn t want to hurt will i am fond of will i am he doesn t stir me not any longer but i depend on him he is home and children i wonder when we will begin to have children i do want them i wonder whether i remembered to tell to have tomorrow instead of she will have gone to bed by now perhaps i ll be up early enough ever so fond of will i wouldn t hurt him even if i had to lose the mad love if the prince came i d look once at him and rim fast oh you are not heroic nor fine you are the vulgar young female but i m not the wife who confiding that she s misunderstood oh i m not i m not am i at least i didn t whisper to about will s faults and his blindness to my remarkable soul i didn t matter of fact will probably understands me perfectly if only if he would just back me up in rousing the town how many how many wives there must be who over the first who smiles at them no i i i i main street you were speaking of dr tell me you ve never him up is he really a good doctor oh yes he s a wise old there i you see there is no medical not in my house she said triumphantly to she hung her silk on a closet hook and went on dr is so gentle and well i don t know as i d say he was such a whale of a scholar i ve always had a suspicion he did a good deal of four flushing about that he likes to have people think he keeps up his french and greek and lord knows what all and he s always got an old book lying around the sitting room but i ve got a he reads stories bout like the rest of us and i don t know where he d ever learn so many languages anyway he kind of lets people assume he went to or or oxford or somewhere but i looked him up ih the medical and he from a college in way back in but this is the important thing is he an honest doctor how do you mean honest depends on what you mean suppose you were sick would you call him in would you let me call him in not if i were well enough to and bite i wouldn t no sir i wouldn t have the old in the house makes me tired his everlasting and soft he s all right for an ordinary or holding some fool woman s hand but i wouldn t call him in for an honest to god illness not much i wouldn t no sir you know i don t do much but same time i ll tell you i ve never got over being sore at for the way he treated mrs nothing the matter with her what she really needed was a rest but kept calling on her and calling on her for weeks almost every day and he sent her a good big fat bill too you can bet i never did forgive him for that nice decent hard working people like the in her she was standing at the engaged in the invariable rites of wishing that she had a real dressing table with a triple mirror of bending toward the glass and raising her chin to inspect a pin head on her throat and finally of brushing her hair in to the strokes she went on main street i wasn t kicking i just meant i wouldn t want the fire to go out on us leave that open and the fire might burn up and go out on us and the nights are beginning to get pretty cold again pretty cold on my drive i put the side curtains up it was so chilly but the is working all right now yes it is chilly but i feel fine after my walk go walking i went up to see the by a definite act of will she added the truth they weren t in and i saw dropped into his office why you haven t been sitting and with him till eleven o clock of course there were some other people there	42
and wiu what do you think of dr why i noticed him on the street today was he if the poor fish would have his teeth x bet nine and a half cents he d find an there he calls it hell he s behind the times wonder he doesn t himself a profound and serious i hate to break up the party but it s getting late and a doctor never knows when hell get out before morning she remembered that he had given this explanation in these words not less than thirty times in the year i guess we better be trotting up to bed i ve wound the clock and looked at the furnace did you lock the front door when you came in they up stairs after he had turned out the lights and twice tested the front door to make sure it was fast while they talked they were preparing for bed still sought to maintain privacy by behind the screen of the closet door was not so tonight as every night she was irritated by having to push the old chair out of the way before she could open the closet door every time she opened the door she the chair ten times an hour but liked to have the chair in the room and there was no place for it except in front of the closet she pushed it felt angry hid her anger was yawning more the room stale she shrugged and became i main street you were speaking of dr tell me you ve never him up is he really a good doctor oh yes he s a wise old you see there is no medical not in my house she said triumphantly to she hung her silk on a closet hook and went on dr is so gentle and well i don t know as i d say he was such a whale of a scholar i ve always had a suspicion he did a good deal of four flushing about that he likes to have people think he keeps up his french and greek and lord knows what all and he s always got an old book lying around the sitting room but i ve got a he reads stories bout like the rest of us and i don t know where he d ever learn so many languages anyway he kind of lets people assume he went to or or oxford or somewhere but i looked him up ih the medical and he from a college in way back in but this is the important thing is he an honest doctor how do you mean honest depends on what you mean suppose you were sick would you call him in would you let me call him in not if i were well enough to and bite i wouldn t no sir wouldn t have the old in the house makes me tired his everlasting and soft he s all right for an ordinary or holding some fool woman s hand but i wouldn t call him in for an honest to god illness not much i wouldn t no sir you know i don t do much but same time i ll tell you i ve never got over being sore at for the way he treated mrs nothing the matter with her what she really needed was a rest but kept calling on her and calling on her for weeks almost every day and he sent her a good big fat bill too you can bet i never did forgive him for nice decent hard working people like the in her she was standing at the engaged in the invariable rites of wishing that she had a real dressing table with a triple mirror of bending toward the glass and raising her chin to inspect a pin head on her throat and finally of brushing her hair in to the strokes she went on main street but will there isn t any of what you might call financial between you and uie partners and mc is there he into bed with a solemn back and a ludicrous kick of his heels as he tucked his legs under the blankets he lord no i i never any man a he can get away from me fairly but is fair isn t he sly sly is the word he s a fox that boy i she saw s grin in the mirror she flushed with his arms behind his head was yawning he s smooth too smooth but i bet i make near as much as and both together though i ve never wanted to more than my just share if anybody wants to go to the partners instead of to me that s his business though i must say it makes me tired when gets hold of the here had been coming to me for every and headache and a lot of little things that just wasted my time and then when his was here last summer and had summer complaint i suppose or something like that probably you know the time you and i drove up to qui why got hold of ma and scared her to death and made her think the kid had and by if he and didn t operate and their heads off about the terrible they found and what a regular and will they were for they let on that if they d waited two hours more the kid would have developed and god knows what all and then they collected a nice fat hundred and fifty dollars and probably they d have charged three if they hadn t been afraid of me i m no but i certainly do hate to give old ten dollars worth of advice for a dollar and a half and then see a hundred and fifty go glimmering and if	42
heads attached she begged i didn t mean to wake you up dear and please don t smoke you ve been smoking so much please go back to sleep i m sorry being sorry s all right but i m going to tell you one or two things this falling for anybody s say so about medical jealousy and competition is simply part and parcel of your usual to think the worst you possibly can of us poor in trouble with women like you is you always want to argue can t take things the way they are got to argue well i m not going to argue about this in any way shape manner or form trouble with you is you don t make any effort to appreciate us you re so damned superior and think the city is such a hell of a lot finer place and you want us to do what you want all the time that s not true it s i who make the effort it s they it s you who stand back and i have to come over to the town s opinion i have to devote myself to their interests they can t even see my interests to say nothing of them i get ever so excited about their old lake and the cottages but they simply in main street that friendly way you so much if i speak of wanting to see also sure whatever that is some nice expensive colony i suppose sure that s the idea champagne taste and beer income and make sure that we never will have more than a beer income too are you by any chance that i am not economical well i hadn t intended to but since you bring it up yourself i don t mind saying the bills are about twice what they ought to be yes they probably are i m not economical i can t be thanks to you where d you get that thanks to you please don t be quite so or shall i say vulgar ni be as damn as i want to how do you get that thanks to you here about a year ago you jump me for not remembering to give you money well i m reasonable i didn t blame you and i said i was to blame but have i ever forgotten it since practically no you haven t practically but that isn t it i ought to have an allowance i will too i must have an agreement for a regular stated amount every month fine idea of course a doctor gets a regular stated amount sure a thousand one month and lucky if he makes a hundred the next very well then a or something else no matter how much you vary you can make a rough average for but what s the idea what are you trying to get at mean to say i m unreasonable think i m so and that you ve got to tie me down with a contract by god that hurts i thought i d been pretty generous and decent and i took a lot of pleasure thinks i she ll be when i hand her over this twenty or fifty or whatever it was and now seems you been wanting to make it a kind of me like a poor fool thinking i was liberal all the while and you please stop pitying yourself you re having a beautiful time feeling injured i admit all you say certainly you ve given me money both freely and quite as if i were your mistress i main street i mean it what was a magnificent spectacle of generosity to you was humiliation to me you gave me money gave it to your mistress if she was and then you don t interrupt me then you felt you d discharged all obligation well hereafter refuse your money as a gift either i m your partner in charge of the household department of our business with a regular for it or else i m nothing if i m to be a mistress i shall choose my lovers oh i hate it i hate it this and hoping for money and then not even spending it on jewels as a mistress has a right to but spending it on double and for you yes indeed you re generous you give me a dollar right out the only is that i must spend it on a tie for you and you give it when and as you wish how can i be anything but oh well of course looking at it that w y i can t shop around can t buy in large quantities have to stick to stores where i have a charge account good deal of the time can t plan because i don t know how much money i can depend on that s what i pay for your charming about giving so generously you make me wait wait you know you re you never thought about that mistress stuff till just this minute matter of fact you never have and hoped for money but all the same you may be right you ought to run the household as a business ill figure out a definite plan tomorrow and hereafter you ll be on a regular amount or with your own checking account oh that is decent of you she turned toward him trying to be affectionate but his eyes were pink and in the of tjie match with which he lighted his dead and cigar his head drooped and a ridge of flesh scattered with pale small out under his chin she sat in till he no t especially decent it s just fair and god knows i want to be fair but i expect others to be	42
fair too and you re so high and mighty about people take sam best soul that ever lived honest and loyal and a damn good fellow yes and a good shot at ducks don t forget that main street well and he is a good shot too sam drops around in the evening to sit and visit and by just because he takes a dry smoke and rolls his cigar around in his mouth and maybe a few times you look at him as if he was a oh you didn t know i was you and i certainly hope sam hasn t noticed it but i never miss it i have felt that way but i m sorry you caught my thoughts i tried to be nice i tried to hide them maybe i catch a whole lot more you think i do yes perhaps you do and d you why sam doesn t light his cigar when he s here why he s so afraid be offended if he you scare him every time he speaks of the weather you jump him because he ain t talking about poetry or or some other you ve got him so he scarcely dares to come here oh i am sorry though i m sure it s you who are now well now i don t know as i am and i can tell you one thing if you keep on you ll manage to drive away every friend i ve got that would be horrible of me you know i don t mean to will what is it about me that sam if i do frighten him oh you do all right stead of putting his legs up on another chair and his and telling a good story or maybe me about something he sits on the edge of his chair and tries to make conversation about politics and he doesn t even and sam s never real comfortable unless he can a little in other words he isn t comfortable unless he can behave like a peasant in a mud hut now that ll be about enough of that you want to know how you scare him first you deliberately fire some question at him that you know dam well he can t answer any fool could see you were with him and then you shock him by talking of or something like you were doing just now of course the pure samuel never speaks of such ladies in his private conversations main street not when there s ladies around you can bet your life on that so the lies in failing to pretend that now we won t go into all that or whatever damn you choose to call it as i say first you shock him and then you become so that nobody can follow you either you want to dance or you bang the piano or else you get moody as the devil and don t want to talk or anything if you must be why can t you be that way by yourself my dear man there s nothing i d like better than to be by myself occasionally to have a room of my own i suppose you expect me to sit here and dream delicately and satisfy my while you wander in from the with all over your face and shout seen my brown he did not sound impressed he made no answer he turned out of bed his feet making one solid on the floor he marched from the room a grotesque figure in union she heard him drawing a drink of water at the tap she was furious at the of his exit she down in bed and looked away from him as he returned he ignored her as he into bed he yawned and casually stated well you ll have plenty of privacy when we build a new house when oh build it all right don t you fret but of course i don t expect any credit for it now it was she who and ignored him and felt independent and as she shot up out of bed turned her back on him a lone and out of her glove box in the top right hand drawer of the at it found that it had filling said damn wished that she had not said it so that she might be superior to his and hurled the into the where it made an evil and mocking clatter among the of torn linen and box then in great dignity and self she returned to bed all this time he had been talking on his assertion that he didn t expect any credit she was reflecting main street that he was a rustic that she hated him that she had been insane to marry him that she had married him only because she was tired of work that she must get her long gloves cleaned that she would never do anything more for him and that she mustn t forget his for breakfast she was roused to attention by his i m a fool to think about a new house by the time i get it built you ll probably have succeeded in your plan to get me completely in dutch with every friend and every patient i ve got she sat up with a she said coldly thank you very much for revealing your real opinion of me if that s the way you feel if i m such a to you i can t stay imder this roof another minute and i am perfectly well able to earn my own living i will go at once and you may get a divorce at your pleasure what you want is a nice sweet cow of a woman who will enjoy having your dear friends talk about the weather and spit on the floor tut	42

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