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Who doesn't love those online budget calculators? I definitely used them when I was planning my wedding! But many of them leave out some crucial items that every bride needs and those costs can add up fast. Check out what you may have forgotten to budget for: 1. Alterations Of course you set aside money for your dress, but unless you're a perfect sample size, that number also has to cover any hemming up, taking in, or letting out your gown needs to fit you like a dream. Some bridal salons include alterations in the price of the dress; many don't, and they can cost anywhere from $50 $600 (mine were $575!). 2. Undergarments Maybe you're super-trim and can get away with wearing your regular bra and underwear on your wedding day. I needed some help in the slimming department, and a corset and Spanx (for a total of about $100) came to the rescue. 3. Accessories It's true you can order a veil online for as little as $15. If you want an exact match to the lace on your gown, though, you may need to cough up a lot more. I was wedding-dress shopping with my best friend Emily this weekend, and we came across veils that were over $500! Don't forget to budget for a necklace, earrings, a bracelet, a wedding ring (I forgot to leave money for that!), shoes, comfy shoes to change into (if you hate heels like I do), and a pretty bag if you'll want to carry one around. 4. Ceremony Doodads What do I mean? Unity candles for lighting, Kiddush cups for drinking from, brooms for jumping over, fabric for tying your hands together, and the like. Pretty much every religious or cultural tradition calls for some extra accessories. 5. Hair and Makeup Trials Even when the budget's tight, you don't want to take a chance on a stylist you've never worked with. Trust me. I had two hair trials and three makeup trials before I found the people I wanted to be in charge of my wedding-day look (and I'm not even high-maintenance I swear!) 6. Postage Wedding invitations are so rarely the right weight and shape to warrant the lowest level of postage (what is it now? 41 cents?). I know someone whose invites cost nearly $2 a piece to send! Multiply that by 200 guests and that's a big, fat chunk of change. 7. Tips I know, I know: When you're already shelling out hundreds (OK, thousands) of dollars for a single service, it seems crazy to tack on extra, but it's the right thing to do, so leave room in the budget for everyone in this tipping guide. 8. Bridal Party Gifts I bought my ladies their bridesmaid dresses over a year before our wedding, so I totally neglected to budget for gifts for the groomsmen and our parents. (We got them monogrammed money clips and engraved photo frames, for the record!) More from Glamour 21 Gorgeous Wedding Dresses (From $100 to $1,000!) 39 of the Sparkliest Engagement Rings Ever 8 Unexpected Wedding Costs 10 Tips to Looking Good in Photos, Even if You're Not the Bride 36 Gorgeous Wedding Dresses You Haven't Seen Yet
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Our experts weigh in on what's true and what's not when it comes to your biggest dating dilemmas. True or False? Opposites attract. False."I have no idea how this could have gotten started," says Wayne Anderson, Ph.D., a professor emeritus of psychology at the University of Missouri.Video: Unspoken rules of a happy marriageHe says it's rare to see a long-term relationship that's been based on opposite personalities or preferences. We are more likely, he adds, to be attracted to "people like ourselves in terms of values and background." True or False? You can totally change him. False.Any personal growth and change has to be motivated by him, says Andrea Syrtash, dating and relationship expert and author of He's Just Not Your Type (And That's a Good Thing). "Trying to mold him into someone he's not or someone you want him to be is generally a recipe for resentment.Bing: Can you change someone?One of my basic relationship principles is that people want to be challenged not changed. He wants to be challenged to become a better version of himself and who he ultimately wants to be, not the person you want him to be." True or False? Women are attracted to different types of men at different points in time and we're talking week to week here. True. Ever fancied a Ryan Gosling type one week and then gone all Hugh Jackman the next? "Women are attracted to different types of men depending upon their menstrual cycle," says Anderson.Video: How to say 'I love you' for the first time True or False? It's better to live together before you get married. False(ish).The value of cohabiting before tying the knot essentially boils down to who you are as individuals, says UCLA psychology professor Thomas Bradbury, Ph.D.Bing: How a relationship changes when you live togetherFor example, he says, couples who don't live together tend to be more religious than couples who do, and those kinds of differences, not whether you live together before marriage, are more indicative of relationship success. True or False? Pheromones aren't real. False.They're totally a thing, and they help determine whom we're attracted to, says Anderson.Video: How to date on a tight budgetFor example, he says, recent research has shown that women are more drawn to the smell of some men's T-shirts after the guy has slept in them a few nights. True or False? Marriage kills your sex life. False.No way, says Bradbury. A study from 1994 shows married people have sex more often than singles and about the same amount as couples who live together. True or False? Guys are intimidated by successful women. False."Big myth!" says Syrtash. "Most men I've interviewed cite intelligence and confidence as must-haves…. A confident man wants a confident woman. Just make sure you're not so confident that you come off as arrogant or judgmental those are generally deal breakers for men and women." True or False? A cool girl always keeps it all together in front of her guy. False."Men want you to be self-assured and also want to know that they're needed, so if a woman never shows any vulnerability, he may find it hard to get close to her," says Syrtash. "Nobody wants to date Ms. Perfect." True or False? You should wait until the third date to sleep with him. False."The average man reports that he knows pretty fast if he's into you and wants to have a relationship," says Syrtash. "If he sleeps with you and doesn't call you again, chances are he was never going to follow up and pursue you. Men don't generally analyze these things the way we think they do. Very few men will think, I really like her and am into her; but she slept with me…so I guess it's over! And as for the ones who do, do you really want to date them?" Bottom line: Do what you're comfortable with, when you're comfortable with it.
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A guide to staying together forever…straight from divorce lawyers! They know what tears couples apart, and they'll tell you how to avoid it. Do not name-call "I've had clients whose spouses have called them everything: bad parent, liar every nasty word in the book. Just don't go there. You can't take it back, and people carry that stuff with them for years. In litigation, one spouse will say, 'You called me a [blank] five years ago,' and the other says, 'I don't know what you're talking about!""You've got to choose your words wisely and learn to fight well. I really think that is the key to maintaining a marriage.""If my husband says something to me that's hurtful, I will say, 'What was the purpose of that?' I won't respond in kind or feed into it. Don't hit someone in a sensitive spot, like where they're insecure, especially if they've opened up to you about it. That's really hurtful. It destroys trust. People forgive, but they do not forget. Trust me." Jacqueline Newman, 38, partner at Berkman Bottger Newman & Rodd, LLP, New York; married for eight years to Jarrod, 40, also an attorney. Limit your venting My husband and I are very open, but we try not to vent too much to each other.""He's in his medical residency, and sometimes he complains about the hours. I let him go to some extent, but if I've been hearing it for a week straight, I'll supportively point out that this is what he signed up for when he decided to become a doctor, and at the end of it, he is going to have a fulfilling job that he loves.""Then I'll ask what we can do to make it better, because here's the deal: Venting isn't productive. It's a drain. And it won't break a marriage right away, but if one spouse keeps unloading, it leads to bigger, marriage-breaking issues, like infidelity, which is what happened to one of my clients.""Her husband had a negative outlook on everything. Everything. He was always the victim. He leaned on her constantly. She was being his rock, but he wasn't hers. Eventually, she looked for that support elsewhere, and she had an affair. It's easy to vent at people you love because you think they'll still love you at the end of the day. But if you keep doing it, they might not. Jessica Winkler Boike, 30, associate at Beermann Pritikin Mirabelli Swerdlove LLP, Chicago; married for three years to Justin, 30, a medical resident. Make sex a really huge priority "I had a case like five years back where the wife served my client with divorce papers the same day they had been sexually intimate. He said, Not to be crass, but the reason I'm shocked is that (we just had sex)!'""We were all laughing he was quite a character but that's not usually the case. By the time most cases get to my desk, there's no sex at all.""My husband and I are both working full-time, we're moving, we have a two-year-old, and we have to remind ourselves that we need to keep things romantic. It's important. You can't just go to work and pay the bills. Marriage is not a business! When my clients complain about a lack of intimacy, it's not because they stopped being attracted to each other. It's that sex usually goes when you're stressed. But you have to make time. Sex is important to staying married." Roxana Taghavi Morgan, 35, associate at Meyer, Olson, Lowy & Meyers, LLP, Los Angeles; married for four years to Tad, 40, a lab tech and singer.Video: The sex life of the average couple"You need to have fun together. If you don't, one of you will start having fun somewhere else." Shana Vitek, divorce lawyer Date your…husband When people come to my office, they'll say, This is not the person I married. And I ask, When did you stop knowing each other? And they can't put their finger on it.""Well, they haven't been taking the time to get to know their partner the way they did when they were dating. People's interests change over time; mine definitely have. You have to keep on learning about each other. I've seen people who don't take that time to reconnect, and when they come to me, they're leading two separate lives. Sometimes it's not too late, though: I worked with one couple who had basically just grown apart, and they took a week off during the divorce, went on a vacation, and it rekindled their romance."" They put their divorce on hold and we haven't heard from them since! It's all proof that you need the dating element in marriage. You need to schedule time to see your spouse and continue to get to know them. I even need to remind myself of that. My husband and I don't get out to dinner as often today as we did when were dating, but when we do, it's exciting and energizing. We reminisce. We laugh. We reconnect.""You need to have that fun together. If you don't have fun together, one of you will have it somewhere else. We see that again and again. Shana Vitek, 33, partner at Beermann Pritikin Mirabelli Swerdlove LLP, Chicago; married for four years to Eric Kessel, 39, a medical sales rep. Be prepared for curveballs Talk about all the big issues career, religion, where to live before you get married, but know this: People flip-flop on those issues all the time." "I've had several cases where the husband says, My wife said she'd go back to work after having kids, and she didn't go back. "" It happens in religious contexts too: Couples start off at the same level of faith, then one person becomes less devout, and there's stress about the religious education of the children.""This came up in my own marriage in 2008. After seven years of living in Atlanta, my husband, Kevin, told me he wanted to move back to Charlottesville, Va., where we both went to college. I did a lot of laps in the pool, which is my version of prayer, thinking, What do I do now? And I agreed to do it for him. I quit my job, and we went. Everyone evolves. Everyone revises their life plans. It's up to you to decide if you can work with your partner to find a mutually agreed-upon course of action. We're now back in Atlanta, but I'm so happy that I agreed to that move. It showed I took his feelings seriously. Sarah McCormack, 37, partner at Kessler & Solomiany, LLC, Atlanta; married for 10 years to Kevin, 37, a Web producer.milestones You're upset? Say something, woman! I have a whole list of personal questions I ask all my clients when they come in. I call it my skeletons-in-the-closet list and they'll tell me examples of issues in their marriage. Oftentimes, the issues don't sound like that big a deal to me, but to my client? They're huge." "One woman had planned on going to a big family party, and it fell on opening day of deer-hunting season, which is something her husband did every year. He made an appearance at her event, then left to go on his hunting trip and she was so mad! It was a big deal to her, but she didn't express it until years later.""If she'd said something back then, I think he probably would have apologized, and they would have moved on. Instead, she let that anger build up, and eventually she cited it to me as a breaking moment in their marriage." "What that tells me is that you've got to work through things that bug you as they come up. My husband and I talk about everything. We know: If we handle little problems now, we can work through them. But when you hold onto those issues, they compound, and that leads to a blow-up or, worse, a grudge. And let me tell you, people are good at holding grudges. Teresa Evans, 37, shareholder at Quilling, Selander, Lownds, Winslett & Moser, P.C., Dallas; married for 11 years to Scott, 52, a dentist. And the divorce lawyers' No.1 rule for not splitting up is… Talk about everything, say Tara and Adam. They met in court! In 2008, divorce lawyer Tara Scott represented the husband in a contentious case for her Los Angeles law firm. Her opposition? Adam Lipsic, an equally tough attorney. Their clients may have fought like crazy, but the lawyers began dating soon after they finished the case, and in January 2011 you can't make this stuff up they were married by the same judge who divorced their clients. Now they're the proud parents of baby Lily and they say their jobs watching other couples' marriages go down in flames have helped them do things smarter. We both get enough arguing at work, says Lipsic. The last thing we want to do when we get home is fight. Another lesson from the office: function as a team. A lot of people continue to operate as single people who are married, says Scott. Separate lives lead to secrets and betrayals. We discuss everything finance, careers, who's in charge of groceries. Lipsic agrees: I don't think most couples have the conversations we, given our line of work, consider standard. And they try to keep those talks from becoming blow-ups. After all, there is no winner in an argument, says Lipsic. If you're fighting, you've both already lost.
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Is there some sort of monster hiding, waiting to ruin relationships come holiday time? This year, refuse to let it get you…or at least come prepared if it does. You Have Holiday Sex With Your Ex Is there some sort of monster hiding, waiting to ruin relationships come holiday time? This year, refuse to let it get you...or at least come prepared if it does. THE DRAMA: "My high school sweetheart and I hung out at a bar over Thanksgiving," says Kelly*, 24. "One thing led to another, and we ended up fooling around." The next morning she realized: mistake! "I prayed that it was a dream," she recalls, "but it was clear from his texts and emails that he thought we were back together. It was incredibly awkward."*Some names have been changed. You Have Holiday Sex With Your Ex THE DEAL: Connecting with an ex over the holidays is common, says Bethany Marshall, Ph.D., a licensed marriage and family therapist in Pasadena, California. "It's a nostalgic time," she says. "You gravitate toward things that are comfortable and familiar, and there he is." You know, like your favorite kind of pie, except in guy form! So just make sure you both know where things stand. "Listen and hear where he is emotionally," says Marshall. If he's trying to make plans with you for New Year's and you're totally over him, let him down gently (which, Kelly admits, can be secretly satisfying if he's the one who dumped you in the first place). And next year don't do the bar thing, OK? Your Gift Makes His Look Tiny… THE DRAMA: "Michael and I weren't exclusive yet when the holidays rolled around, but I thought it was getting serious," says Alyse, 28. "I got him this really nice silver bracelet engraved with his name. He opened it and put it on right away." Then Alyse opened his gift to her: a set of Austin Powers DVDs. "It was comical but also awful," she recalls. "I wondered if we weren't as close as I'd thought. When a relationship is that new, how can you tell?" Your Gift Makes His Look Tiny… THE DEAL: Don't assume a small gift means small feelings. "Some people are just lousy gift givers, especially in the beginning," says Paulette Kouffman Sherman, Ph.D., who specializes in relationship coaching in New York City. "If you gave too much, consider yourself generous, and be glad you made another person happy." But if you're just not that Zen (who is?), and his teeny little, ahem, package spooks you, explore those feelings: Alyse laughed off the mismatch but had The Talk with Michael a few days later, and they agreed to be monogamous. To avoid overgifting in the future, Marshall suggests experiential things you can enjoy together, like tickets to a basketball game or a play. Of course, if he gives you diamond earrings in return…actually, that's fine. …or His Gift to You Is Heinous THE DRAMA: Any relationship, even a marriage, that's been tootling along just fine can hit some rough patches when it comes to gifts. "One year, my darling husband gave me cookbooks for Christmas," says Seattle's Jennifer, 40. "Not just cookbooks, but diet cookbooks. I had no idea what to say. He'd obviously heard my whining about my figure. It wasn't snark or meanness. But I was really surprised." And it wasn't just that they were diet books, she adds: "They were hard-core vegan and I'm not. I had that 'You don't really know me at all' feeling." …or His Gift to You Is Heinous THE DEAL: There are women who would be perfectly happy with a vegan diet book as a gift, but it was the wrong gift for Jennifer and it shook her faith in her marriage. (See also: giving flats to the woman who never takes off her stilettos, ski lessons to the woman who shivers when it's 70 degrees or paperbacks to the woman who reads everything on her Kindle.) "People want an idealized holiday experience, which includes a perfect gift," says Marshall. "They expect the other person to magically know what they want." As most men are not actually able to read minds, this is unlikely to occur. Instead, make your desires known via the ancient tradition of a wish list or even a face-to-face conversation (!), sweetly suggesting the types of gifts you like pampering rather than useful, or the other way around, for example. Whether you leave your list where he can find it, email it to him anonymously or just program it right into his phone is up to you. You Break Up Just Before the Holidays THE DRAMA: Sara, 29, of Portland, Oregon, and her boyfriend of two years had split in November, and, she says, "I was miserable at the thought of weeks of holiday events as a newly single person." When she tried to put up her Christmas tree on her own and it refused to stay in the stand, she recalls, "I cried for the millionth time." A plucky Sandra Bullock would play Sara in the movie, but how can you get through the holidays with a broken heart? You Break Up Just Before the Holidays THE DEAL: The key is to not generalize events that occur this time of year, says Marshall. "Some people feel that if they don't have someone on that special day, that means they never will. But just because there's no one right now doesn't mean you won't find love. This is not your whole life." Silver-lining time: All those holiday breakups mean there are more available men out there than there were a month ago! Go get 'em. You Insult His Family THE DRAMA: On her first trip home for the holidays with her boyfriend Chris, Jamie, a 28-year-old Texan, played things pretty well at first. When Chris's mom insisted she eat some black-eyed peas as part of a family tradition, she complied, despite hating them. Good-girlfriend moment achieved! But after the meal, while talking to Chris' sister, things went wrong. "I said the peas were gross and I hated eating them," Jamie recalls. "His mom overheard me and burst into tears. I didn't know traditions were so important to her; I later learned that she had been using the same exact wrapping paper every holiday for 25-plus years! I felt pretty terrible." You Insult His Family THE DEAL: Once the damage is done, you've got to move quickly to repair it, says professional matchmaker and dating coach Suzanne K. Oshima: "Don't ignore the situation and hope it will go away, because it won't. You will always be known as the girlfriend who offended his mother. Apologize and make amends so everyone can move on." Jamie did just that, and thankfully it worked. Of course, the best solution is to head off such problems. You googled your boyfriend (admit it) when you started dating; do similar research on his family, with him as your expert source. Find out what their conversational third rails are (Obama? plastic surgery?) before you arrive, and avoid them. And eat your peas. You're Not Included in His Holiday Plans THE DRAMA: They'd been dating for a year and a half, so Katie, 32, wanted to spend the holidays with her boyfriend Scott. Scott had other plans. Plans that involved tequila but not her. "He informed me that he was going to Mexico with his family for New Year's and I wasn't," she says. "He had also not invited me home for Thanksgiving." Understandably, she was hurt. You're Not Included in His Holiday Plans THE DEAL: When confronted with this type of disappointment, says Kouffman Sherman, resist the urge to make it bigger than it is. "Don't turn 'He's going without me' into 'He doesn't love me,'" she says. Look for alternative explanations. "Perhaps his family always goes on a trip alone and significant others aren't invited," she says. "Ask before you assume the worst." But Katie and her guy had been together well over a year; at that point, a noninvite is a warning sign but not a death knell. "If he isn't ready to include you, maybe you can have a nonpressured conversation to find out why," says Kouffman Sherman. "Look at his overall behavior. Does he invite you to weddings and work parties? Does he speak about your future? Does he leave the room to take phone calls?" Those, needless to say, are clues worth heeding.Katie was honest with Scott about her feelings, and it helped. "I told him that I was upset," she says, "and then he had some time to really think about it because I went off on a trip to Costa Rica with my sister without him." When Katie returned, he invited her to Mexico after all. A happy ending and tequila for everyone! Your Family Can't Deal With Your Being Single THE DRAMA: Elizabeth, 29, of Columbus, Ohio, has spent the past few Decembers kicking it solo. Well, not entirely solo; her family has relegated her to the kids' table to make room for everyone else's girlfriends and boyfriends. "Generally I play babysitter," she says a bit of a conversational letdown, considering she's working on a Ph.D. in history. "It's as if being single means that you're not a true adult," she says. "The first question out of some people's mouths is 'Are you seeing anyone?' It all gets pretty annoying and stressful. I'm actually happy with my life!" Short of hiring a fake escort for the season (that movie would star Tina Fey), how do you cope? Your Family Can't Deal With Your Being Single THE DEAL: "There is so much pressure on young women to be paired off," says Joan Allen, a relationship expert and author. "If you called a guy who's single at Christmas, he would be sitting back watching the game with a beer, not crying into it." Allen suggests stopping love-life inquisitors dead in their tracks: "Just put a smile on your face and say, 'Why do you ask?' It makes them realize how they sound." Allen also endorses Elizabeth's strategy: focusing the conversation on what she's doing her dissertation instead of what's not happening in the romance department. You Were So Sure He'd Propose THE DRAMA: Thirty-year-old Laura, of Belvidere, New Jersey, was looking forward to the holidays and a proposal. "We'd been together over a year and were talking about getting engaged," says Laura. "He even took me ring shopping!" On Christmas Eve, he handed her a jewelry box from her favorite shop. "Any girl looking at that box would have thought, This is it," she recalls. "But there was an MP3 player inside." Laura was crushed by the proposal fail and mortified that it all happened in front of her family. "I felt tricked," she says. He wasn't done with his shenanigans: After he pulled a similar Valentine's Day fake-out, she dumped him. Smart girl. You Were So Sure He'd Propose THE DEAL: It's easy to get focused on when and where you are going to get that ring (so shiny! so sparkly!), but you have to go deeper than jewelry to see what his actions (or nonactions) represent, says Marshall: "Look at the intangibles. Does he have empathy? Does he make references to the future? If you have those factors, that's more important than a ring." On the other hand, "If he never talks about the future, not getting a ring isn't your biggest problem," she says. "He may not be emotionally invested in the relationship." This was true for Laura. "After Valentine's Day," she says, "I knew he was never going to commit to me." It was time to move on and she did, to a new guy who is now her husband. Did we mention she's smart?
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Be a mental-health expert on how to keep anger, anxiety, and depression at bay through everyday habits. Good Sleep Research shows that people who go without enough good sleep (generally considered at least six hours a night) are up to six times as likely to become depressed as those who get good sleep. Good Sex Levels of the "happy neurochemicals" serotonin and endorphin have been found to rise in postorgasmic rats. At the same time, there's a surge in oxytocin — which is believed to reduce stress levels — as well as an uptick in prolactin, thought to be associated with the sleepy feeling after sex. These findings suggest that having sex (or taking matters into your own hands) brings some temporary relief for stress or anxiety. Good Exercise Good ExerciseParticularly aerobic exercise. The best evidence to date — based on the analysis of fourteen random controlled trials — indicates that to prevent, and even effectively treat, depression with exercise requires three thirty-minute sessions per week of aerobic exercise at 60 to 80 percent of maximum heart rate (i.e., typically between 110 and 160 beats per minute) for at least eight weeks. Good Food Up your intake of omega-3 fatty acids and vitamin B12, both of which show promise in contributing to mental well-being. Tuna, mackerel, and salmon are good sources for omega-3 fatty acids, as are dark green vegetables, flaxseed, nuts, and soybeans. For sources of B12, look to seafood and low-fat dairy products. Carbs have also been found to raise the level of serotonin in your brain, but it's best to stick with low-fat, whole-grain sources. Alcohol Take it easy and limit it to the standard two drinks a day.
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When you and your guy are tight with other couples, double-dating can be a blast. But the old standby of meeting up at a cute neighborhood restaurant for dinner can get pricey fast. So, here are some double date ideas that won't break the bank. Retro Double Features Invite your best couple friends over (after you've both had dinner) and watch your favorite movies together. Ask them to bring along a copy of an older movie they can't get enough of. Whip together a few snacks and enjoy! After you've watched their movie, pop in a classic movie you and your beau love. My husband Chris and I would probably pick "Ghostbusters" or "Blade Runner." Kingpins and Queenpins Bowling is surprisingly budget-friendly, especially on weekdays or during the day on Saturdays and Sundays. While there are plenty of fancy-schmancy lanes out there, I prefer the old-school, '80s-style venues. They remind me of being a kid, plus they're usually way more affordable than the high-end spots. A little competition is always fun; you could play guys against gals, couple against couple, older versus younger, whatever rolls your bowling ball! The losers can buy a round of drinks or snacks for the victors. Light beer and nachos at the snack shop won't set you back too much. Game On Speaking of competition, invite a few of your couples friends over for a few rounds of your favorite board or card games. Each couple could strategize to gain the upper hand or it could just be a free for all. When I'm playing Monopoly, I'm in it to win it! During rounds (and trash-talking) you can all munch on tasty homemade snacks or guilty pleasures like Funyuns and CornNuts. {none}
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1. Lend a Hand We turned to Michael Swaim and Cary McNeal of guyspeak.com for the love nuggets every married man needs to hear. Nothing gets a woman hotter than getting down on your hands and knees, getting sweaty and … scrubbing the grout in the bathroom. Man up when it comes to household duties; it pays off. BING: HOBBIES TO DO WITH YOUR SPOUSE 2. R-E-S-P-E-C-T Be respectful to your in-laws. They may not deserve it, but your wife does. Do it for her. 3. Hand-Holding Hold her hand. Often. And if you ever lose your hands, hold elbows. 4. Work at Your Marriage "Marriage is not a noun; it's a verb. It isn't something you get. It's something you do. It's the way you love your partner every day." 4. Work at Your Marriage 5. Confide Carefully Sometimes when times are tough, you've got to talk to someone, anyone other than your wife, just to get perspective. But keep in mind that your friends are there to support you, not provide perspective, and don't say anything you can't take back once these troubles are behind you. 6. Don't Write Off Counseling Everyone should be in marriage counseling because marriage is hard. If your car is having problems, you take it to a mechanic. Don't give up on a relationship you value without exploring every possible avenue for healing first. 7. Make Time for Sex Never underestimate the importance of sex to marriage. 8. Surprise Her Do something nice for your wife, with no provocation, no less than once a week. If you have to put it on your calendar, if you have to tattoo it on your forehead, make it happen. Your life will be longer and happier for it. 9. Apologize Be the first one to say "I'm sorry" or "I was wrong," even when you're not sorry and you weren't wrong. 10. Give Her a Hug Hug her. They dig that. 11. Don't Try to Change Her Every new husband thinks he can change his wife. Every experienced husband wishes he could have back all the time and energy he spent trying to do so. 12. Be Open To Changes People change as years go by, and so do marriages. Be flexible. 13. Fight Fair When you fight and you will fight fairly. The causes of a quarrel will fade from memory, but cruel words are remembered for years. 14. Remind Yourself Why You Love Her Marriage is a choice you make every day, not just at the altar. Once in a while, it's important to remind yourself why you chose this woman, and why you still choose her. 15. Treat Her Right Put her above all others. That includes your parents, your children, and yourself.Video: Married for 55 Years: Imogine and Elmer>More from Bing and MSN Lifestyle Site Search: Get additional content on happily married men, healthy marriages and love advice.See Also: 15 Love Rules for Married Women; 15 Love Rules for Single Men
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By Lindsey Unterberger And you thought your breakup was bad? The ways these ladies were dumped might leave you feeling like that whole "Berger calling it quits with Carrie on a Post-it" thing was a good idea. Read on as seven women share their miserable breakup stories. Dumped at the Office "After dating this guy for a while, he sent me an e-mail saying, 'I need to talk to you about something,' and he asked if I could meet him right away. I told him I was at work, and he said, 'Okay, I'll be right there.' I had a good idea what he was about to do, so when he texted me from outside my building and asked if he could come up, I was shocked! Dump me at my cubicle in front of my coworkers?! Instead, I met him outside. Five minutes later, I was back to work at my desk and haven't spoken to him since." Kate, 25 Her Boyfriend's Other Girlfriend Dumped Her "My first love called me while I was watching Love Actually (ironic) and said, 'she knows.' Before the opening credits, I realized she was his other girlfriend, and he was trying to make it sound like I knew all about her and that I was the sidepiece in cahoots with him. I realized my two-year relationship was a farce as she yelled from the background, 'Tell her you love me! Tell her who you want to be with.' He wasn't even man enough to dump me his girlfriend did! Loser." Jennifer, 32 He Ended an Engagement Over Gchat "My friend and her ex-fiancé essentially broke off their engagement on Gchat. A casual conversation went from slightly snarky to full-on nasty, and within an hour, they'd both confessed their doubts about their pending marriage. I think it was a lot easier to type out how they felt than to actually vocalize it. They did end up meeting in person one last time to 'officially' call it off." Sarah, 24 Ditched at the Airport "My boyfriend and I were on the rocks, but months before, his parents had bought us tickets to fly out to Montana for a family wedding the next day. He didn't think I should go, but the ticket was nonrefundable. He drove us to the airport the next day and didn't mention he'd had my ticket canceled…until the check-in clerk told me. The guy said, 'Well, I'll miss my flight if I don't go now, and I'd offer you my car, but I know you can't drive a stick, so … maybe you can call a cab? Bye!' So there I was, stranded 75 miles from home. He never even called to see if I made it home. You can be sure I've learned to drive a stick shift since then." Elle, 26 He Had Her Friend Do the Dirty Work "My first serious boyfriend didn't even break up with me himself. He called, and when I answered, he put one of my girlfriends on the phone to say, 'Brian doesn't want to go out with you anymore.' I was so upset I headed straight to my best friend's house and tearfully told her the news. Before I could calm down enough to stop the tears from flowing, her doorbell rang. It was Brian, there to pick up his little sister (my friend's little sister's best friend). It was mortifying!" Lauren, 25 Dumped by One Boyfriend via Another "Right out of college and after a series of fruitless long-term, committed relationships, I made the mistake of trying to date more than one person at a time. I was a great juggler for a while (keeping them in different cities helped a lot), until one hand decided to find out what the other was doing. In what I can only assume was some backhanded attempt to secure me for himself, boyfriend 1 looked up boyfriend 2 on Facebook (cursed technology!) and spilled the beans. "From what I gathered, the message from 1 to 2 read something like this: 'Hey, 2, you don't know me, but I'm her Kansas City boyfriend, and you must be her St. Louis boyfriend. Nice to meet you.' This of course all transpired before I was even aware 1 knew about 2, so I was given no opportunity to come clean on my own. Instead, I was dumped by 2 because of 1. I subsequently then dumped 1. What a mess!" Maggie, 25 The Birthday Dump "When my high school boyfriend and I went to college, he decided to attend a different school. As our first semester progressed, my November birthday came. I had not heard from him in a few days, so I called, thinking he would want to wish me happy birthday. Instead, my best friend from high school answered (they went to the same college) and said 'I guess you should know we've been hooking up for months. Oh, and happy birthday.'" Julie, 31
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The 2.0-liter turbodiesel under the hood of the 328d wagon asks $1500 over its gasoline-powered equivalent. Knowing this, you might wonder, "Why diesel?" What do you get for that premium? For starters, diesel's higher energy content means a quite substantial improvement in fuel economy. Rated at 31/43 mpg city/hwy, the diesel gains 9/10 mpg over the gasoline car's rating. On top of that, gas-powered BMWs require premium fuel,and it's more expensive than diesel according to current national averages. Using figures of 15,000 annual miles and current average fuel prices, the 328d's fuel savings versus the 328i total roughly $650 a year. That means recovering the premium paid for the diesel takes a little more than 2 years, a short amount of time when compared to how long it takes to recover the premium paid for some hybrid powertrains. Despite having a fuel tank 0.8 gallon smaller than the 328i (that space is reserved for Diesel Exhaust Fluid), the fuel economy advantage also means the 328d can go 114 miles farther per tank. I see more than 500 miles on the range display after most fill-ups, which is a pleasant sight. During a recent trip to Sacramento, the range estimate showed more than 600 miles, meaning I could make the drive without having to stop for fuel. I wish my bladder were as efficient. The trip provided a good opportunity to test BMW's Eco Pro mode. I drove north as I would normally, with the drive mode set to Comfort and with cruise control on. That trip netted 36.2 mpg, which isn't bad considering the high average speed I maintained. On the way back to Los Angeles, I drove the same way, but in EcoPro. Accessed through the drive mode selector toggle, Eco Pro makes the car behave more economically, with a softer throttle, less aggressive shifting, and reduced air conditioning, among other things. It encourages efficient driving with a ticker that counts miles saved and by scoring your traffic anticipation and braking. I tried following the guides, but quickly reverted back to how I normally drive. Even so, on this trip, I averaged 42.3 mpg. With a two-way average of 38.9 mpg, I'm happy with the 328d's fuel economy. My impromptu test was hardly scientific, but that's why we have Emissions Analytics. In its regimented tailpipe sniffing test, the 328d returned 29.8/44.2/34.9 mpg city/hwy/combined. Though its city mpg falls slightly short of the EPA's rating, the 328d makes up for it on the freeway and ultimately matches the combined rating. Either way, the diesel makes a strong case for itself. More on our long-term 2014 BMW 328d xDrive Wagon: Arrival Update 1: Ultimate Driving What, Exactly? Our Car Service life 7973 mi Average fuel economy 0.66 lb/mi CO2 emissions 33.5 mpg EPA City/Hwy/Comb Fuel Econ 31/43/35 mpg Energy consumption 101 kW-hr/100mi Unresolved problems None Maintenance cost $0 Normal-wear cost $0
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Thirty has long been the particular age at which women start panicking about getting married. You may feel ready. You may have been in the game a while. You might feel like you've out-dated every other woman in your city. But the only thing that's really outdated is the notion that you should be married by 30. Seriously, who came up with that? We'll give you 30 reasons it's totally fine to be single at 30 and beyond. Because the best hasn't happened yet If you haven t met the right guy yet (and, no, that one you were head over heels for who didn t return the feeling was not right), then the best is yet to come. Is that such a bad thought? Because you didn't settle It s not like no one wants to marry you. You ve probably already met (and ruled out) some guys who totally would. Remember them and faking your best friend s sudden illness to get out of the date? Yeah. Exactly. You wanted more, and you deserve it. Because you can do whatever you want We repeat: You can do whatever you want! Stay out till 4 A.M. or go to bed at 8 P.M. Watch 20 episodes of "The Real Housewives" back-to-back. It s a beautiful thing. Because you can date any guy you want Imagine the slight twinge of regret a married woman feels when a really sexy stranger hits on her at a bar and she has to say, "Sorry, I'm married." Not you! Go ahead and punch Pierre's number into your iPhone, girl. Because you can have unlimited girl time No one is going to complain if you take a girls' trip to Vegas, spend three weekends in a row at the beach with your friends, or dedicate an entire weekend to brunch and shopping. Because you don't have to share a bed Sex is fun. Cuddling is nice. But the actual sleeping together part is not so fun. Guys steal the covers, take up more space, SNORE, and always want the room to be hotter or colder than you. Enjoy your eight hours of beauty sleep while you can. Because your sex life has no rules You can do whatever you want (just do it safely, please!). Not into random hookups? Even serial monogamists can enjoy a little make-out session here and there, am I right? Because you can wear whatever you want Spend an entire 24-hour period in sweats. No one will know. Because you can stay friends with your exes You don't have to worry about anyone getting jealous when you call your ex to wish him a happy birthday. Oh, what's that? He wants to meet up for a drink to catch up (a.k.a. hook up)? No problem, because you're not married! Because you don't have to shave your legs all the time Yay! Because you can still have kids Two words: Halle. Berry. A lot of women have children in their late 30s and early 40s. Because you don't have to share Enjoy being a little selfish, because if you get married you're going to have to share that dessert, cut back on all those after-work activities and live your entire life with someone else in mind. Because you can still do that crazy thing you always wanted to do Move to the opposite coast? Check. Go back to school? Check. Switch to a completely different career? Check. Because you don't have to share a closet Imagine condensing your clothes into half the space? We shudder to think of it. Because you can meet guys anytime, anywhere Smile and say hi to the hotness on the street/in the elevator/at the bar. You are free to meet someone fabulous 24 hours a day. Because no one really cares Ever notice how, other than your family, the only people who ask when you're getting married are those who were in a rush to get married themselves? How nice for them. Now go on living your life. Because, divorce With so many marriages failing, that piece of paper is no guarantee. Life doesn't begin when a ring lands on your finger. Because you don't have to deal with in-laws Real talk: In-laws are (totally unscientifically) 70 percent likely to be annoying in some way. Be glad you have only one set of family drama to deal with. Because you don't have to buy pricey birthday/holiday/anniversary gifts Spend the money on new shoes instead. Holla! Because you can decorate however you want Guys don't usually like pink. Or leopard print. But who cares it's your room! Because having kids changes everything If you plan to get married and have children, life as you know it will change. Try to enjoy things like sleep, free time, and peace and quiet that you might miss later. Because you can wear rings on other fingers We totally get the obsession with pretty, sparkly diamonds. But getting engaged isn't the only opportunity a girl has to procure new jewelry. Treat yourself to something nice for being a smart, successful, good person! That deserves rewarding, no? Because marriage isn't about butterflies in your stomach That amazing rush of adrenaline you feel during a brand-new relationship? That's the opposite of marriage. Marriage is when you love someone enough to be civil long after the butterflies end. So enjoy those butterflies now and you'll have fun memories to look back on when you swap them for something deeper and more durable later. Because guys need help. With everything. Most married men will remind you of children at times. Because you don't have married-person obligations Sitting through mind-numbing dinner parties with your husband's epically boring coworkers? Dislike! Because you can appropriate 30% of your salary to stuff you like Getting married means sharing finances. Some of your personal indulges might have to take a backseat to mortgages, car payments and other shared responsibilities. But now? You can hit up the Bloomie's sale with a clear conscience and no one will roll his eyes at you when you come home. Because some of the awesomest women we know are single There's nothing wrong with you. Come on, Sandra effing Bullock is single. Is there anyone cooler than she is? Correct answer: no. Because there's still time to work on you Everyone brings her own brand of crazy to the table in relationships. Whether it's serious issues or just typical childhood hang-ups, the more work you do before getting married, the better your chances are of being a great partner. Whether you need therapy, a monthly yoga pass, or just a serious sit-down talk with Mom or Dad, do it now! Because 30s are the new 20s Sure, maybe your grandparents tied the knot at 25, but things have changed. Most of us now spend our 20s traveling, enjoying life, and getting our careers sorted out, so it makes sense that marriage would wait until after that happens. Because forever is a long time If you're going to spend the rest of your life with someone (and we hope that's how it turns out), remember that "the rest of your life" is quite a long time. However long it takes to find the right guy, it will be worth it. And you'll have plenty of years ahead of you to spend together.
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If hitting all the usual spots isn't helping you find your soul mate, shake up your routine with some of these 10 great guy-meeting tactics from top-notch dating pros. 1. Shop your friends' friends. Combine your love of online shopping with the best way to meet great guys through friends, suggests Rachel Greenwald, author of Why He Didn't Call You Back: 1,000 Guys Reveal What They REALLY Thought About You After Your Date. Scroll through your friends' friends on Facebook and play a game Greenwald calls "I Spy a Cute Guy." See someone intriguing who's also single (check with your mutual friend if his profile is private)? Ask to be introduced. "Because Facebook isn't an official online dating site, the pressure is off," she says. "You can get to know each other first as friends and go from there." 2. Brush up on the news. Here's a news flash: It's a good idea to make info-gathering an everyday part of your life and not to impress guys (even though it's a fact that they like smart, witty girls), but for your own enrichment and confidence. Make CNN or MSNBC your Internet home page, subscribe to smart-girl secret weapon The Week a cool magazine that boils down each week's news stories into fascinating talking points. Here's the bonus you'll be able to strike up a conversation with just about anyone. 3. Send a love-sparking tweet Twitter can be good for more than getting the play-by-play of your friends' lives. Send a tweet on Friday afternoon that you're meeting friends at your favorite pub for a spontaneous happy hour, suggests Greenwald. "Tell your 'followers' to bring their friends. You're bound to meet new people, and even if they're not single, they might know someone to fix you up with later." 4. Spend some quality time alone. Sure, it can feel weird to catch a movie by yourself or sit solo at a sushi bar, but many happily attached women know that spending some time by yourself is a surefire way to meet someone great, says Karrine Steffans, author of The Vixen Manual. The reason? "Not only can men be put off by a pack of women or even two or three but when they see a woman who seems happy and content by herself, she's so much more approachable and inviting." So relax at a Starbucks with your laptop and a latte, take your dog for a leisurely walk or treat yourself to lunch at an outdoor café solo! 5. Just say "yes". It can be tempting to cancel on a party invite if you're feeling run-down or dying to catch the new episode of your favorite show, but accepting an invite or two each month that you'd otherwise turn down can work wonders for your love life, says Brenda Della Casa, author of Cinderella Was a Liar: The Real Reason You Cannot Find (or Keep) a Prince. Asked out by a guy who doesn't fit your ideal? Say yes to him, too! "I can't tell you how many women have told me they found themselves 'into' their boyfriend or husband after the second or third date. Instead of saying no to every man who doesn't fit your Hugh Jackman fantasy, say yes to dinner with that cute and funny (but shorter than 5'10") neighbor. He might just surprise you." 6. Recycle the single guys you know. Everyone knows interesting guys who aren't right for them (think your single cousin, coworker or a former date who's now a friend) but who might be right for someone else. Spread the wealth by guy-cycling, suggests Greenwald. Host a low-key get-together and recycle those great-but-not-for-you guys by inviting single women to come. Set a one-single-guy minimum, encouraging female guests to bring at least one guy they'd recommend to other girls. Then watch the sparks fly! 8. Hit offbeat dating sites. If you're tired of seeing the same disappointing profiles, don't give up on online dating all together, suggests Greenwald. Instead, try a smaller site with a unique twist, like gk2gk.com ("geek to geek": think Bill Gates), intellectconnect.com (for intellectual singles) and datemypet.com (for pet lovers). Find more by entering "online dating" + your favorite hobby into a search engine. 9. Learn how his stomach thinks. "The best place to meet guys is at a Chipotle restaurant at lunch," says Lisa Holden, 23, from San Francisco. "When my female coworkers and I make it out of the office for lunch, there is always a line of cute guys around the corner. Guys probably like Chipotle because it's a filling meal, but the line is the perfect place to strike up a conversation." We couldn't agree more! 10. Make more female friends. The next time you walk into a party, don't scan the room for handsome men, but rather seek out the most social, outgoing woman you can find, suggests Greenwald. Get to know her and invite her for coffee. Chances are, if you were drawn to her, she'll have a lot of other friends including male ones who were drawn to the same qualities as you. "Women are natural matchmakers, and ultimately coffee with an outgoing girl can be a fabulous gateway to a great guy," says Greenwald. More from MSN Lifestyle Site Search: For additional content on meeting men, click here.
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[Editor's note: John Ortved is the male half of the blogging duo behind Glamour.com's dating blog, Single-ish . This is an excerpt from that blog.] Dating, women and texting. Oh my! I cannot tell you how many emails I get that can basically be summed up as "He never texted me back. What do I do?" Here's a great example: I was late to pick up this guy I was seeing (because of traffic) and he informed me that he had been waiting for me for 30 minutes. He was pretty mad. We didn't really talk much on the way home [what follows is her recount of many barely returned, or unreturned texts she sent the guy over the following days and weeks]…I sent another text and he never said anything. Textual Dysfunction OK ladies, I've talked about texting protocol before, but I want to make this as clear as possible, so here are the five critical points to follow regarding texting: - Stay in the driver's seat - Remain a mystery - Don't seem too eager - Be busy - Keep it short and sweet There's a rule of two here. He sends you a text, you send him two texts. NO! Wrong! He sends a text, you send a text. That's it. Rule of two. And make it short. And sweet. And don't give him too many options. Whatever you think you have to say, you don't. Please trust me. I am both a writer and a guy who knows a little something or other about dating, writing more than he does is not to your benefit. "But won't I sound like a robot?" you ask. Yes. A sexy, unavailable robot, who is far too busy with her awesome robot life to worry about silly boys texting her back. Texting has given both men and women a whole new forum with which to infuriate each other I'm in no way saying that you should be using your phone as a weapon, or the joystick in some game. But you should be using it; it, or he, shouldn't be using you. More from Glamour • 10 Things He"s Thinking When You"re Naked • 15 Things Men Don"t Want You to Know About Them • The Dos and Don'ts of Being Single • Men"s Naked Body Quirks Explained • 12 Secret Signs He's Into You
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Sometimes you have to do things you don't want to do, like hang out with his lame friends. You're not always in the mood to nurse a beer silently while he and his boys argue about who's going to die next on "Game of Thrones" but tomorrow he's sitting through a seven-girl brunch. So. It's possible to spend all your time with someone for lots of years and not get sick of them and love them more than when you first got together. But getting that emotionally close with him might be scary at first. We re not all comfy with close partnerships right off the bat. You can be in the first good relationship you ve ever had, and half the time you want to cry or throw up because you re not used to being that open and vulnerable with a guy you re intimate with. Your significant other probably won t be the kind of person you always thought you d be with. Because chances are your biggest blow-up/failure of a relationship was with someone you considered the perfect guy for you. He wasn t. In a good relationship, it s OK to be the first person who says, I love you. Terrifying? Totally. But when they say it back, you re obviously on the same page, so let go of the idea that you saying it first means you love him more than he loves you. You will finally understand and be moderately more forgiving of friends who blew your tentative brunch dates off to sleep in with their boyfriends. Sometimes you just want to stay in the 11 a.m. spoon position. And friends in relationships who d always counted on you to be the single one might have a surprisingly weird/negative reaction to your relationship. If your best friend is a serial monogamist who s listened to your awful dating stories for years, she might feel threatened that you re growing closer to someone else for the first time. You can give each other bad habits, but you can also cure each other's bad habits like if you drink a lot and your boyfriend doesn't drink. Positive influences are a great perk of a relationship if you are a lazy, soda-guzzling, occasionally-Marlboro-27-smoking sea slug like me, a health-conscious boyfriend means a solid lifestyle change. However, working out together will remain totally unappealing. Unless you are a person I hate, in which case go get matching tracksuits and stay off my block. You won't feel more complete as a person. Everything's pretty much the same, except you're in a relationship. Your biggest fights will probably be about the dumbest things. For instance, I am a veteran of the Great "Why Do You Have to Wear Galoshes; You're a Man" Battle of 2012. No one cares about how you met. Which means: No long, detailed stories about the hilarity or crazy coincidences of your meeting. Please. We're all going to die someday. Everyone you have ever met will try to give you relationship advice. Ninety-five percent of it will be awful. And 100 percent of it is colored by who they are and what their relationships are like. In other words, #TrustNoOne. Kidding, kinda! Just trust your instincts rather than what people tell you: Only you and your significant other can really know what your relationship needs. You can and should still need alone time sometimes. Only people looking for someone to prop them up emotionally fall into Codependenceville. Spend a quiet Sunday to take some "you" time. That overpriced face mask you bought when you were depressed that one day isn't gonna use itself. Sometimes he will buy you ugly stuff and you'll actually like it just because it was from him. Awwwww, baby, this is the best hideous wall sconce shaped like Steve Buscemi's head that I've ever gotten!
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Yes, couples holding hands along sidewalks in the summertime is cute. But just because you're flying solo doesn't mean this can't be your best season ever. Real women and relationship experts tell you what they look forward to as summer singles. by Karina Arrue and Ruby Madren-Britton 1. There's No One to Answer to or Even Ask "Basically, you can take off for the beach on a last-minute whim, go out dancing or do whatever you want without worrying that your boyfriend is bored, uncomfortable or wants to do something else," says Susan J. Elliott, author of Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss Into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You. "Being single in summer is the epitome of freedom." 2. You Become a Zero-Effort Man Magnet "In summer, you show a lot more skin, and suddenly you notice guys checking you out, including in non-creepy ways," says Glamour blogger Erin Meanley, who adopts a wardrobe of short shorts, sundresses and bikinis as soon as the temperature soars. "In winter, you're all covered up and you have to draw a man's eyes from your turtleneck up. But in summer, you can practically attract a guy in your sleep." 3. You Get to Be Your Friends' Plus-One "There's always so much going on in the summer, and being single means free invites from friends who make you their plus-one," says Kim Willard of Houston, Texas. "Every time my friends' boyfriends bail, I get the extra ticket for things like concerts and art exhibitions." 4. You Can Score Some Points at Work "Every summer, my work colleagues disappear on vacations with their significant others. This gives me the opportunity to put in a few extra hours and impress my boss," says Brittany Harding, 29, Seattle, Wash. 5. You'll Sleep Better (Really!) "When it's hot and humid and you don't have air-conditioning, you can sleep solo in your cool sheets," says Annie Tomlin, of bellasugar.com. "There's no big sweaty dude giving off body heat." 6. You Can Try Something New Summer is the perfect time to rediscover old hobbies or explore a new interest. "This summer I will finally have the time to do the things I've always wanted to try. I'm taking salsa dance classes and learning Spanish," says Ellie James, 22, New Haven, Conn. "Plus, you never know who you'll meet when you try new things." 7. Hot Guys are Out in Droves "There are always cute men hanging out at sidewalk cafes ideal for no-commitment, drive-by flirting," says Tomlin. Or "rent a convertible and you can do the whole Thelma and Louise girl-power thing. Minus, you know, the crime. But if a hot Brad Pitt look-alike were to show up, hey, you're single!" 8. You Can Be the Belle of Any Ball "It's about going to barbecues, picnics and parties, hiking and just having a carefree good time," says Jacklyn Laryea, 23, Washington, D.C. "I know that can happen with a significant other, but for me it's more fun doing it with your girls than with your boy." 9. Best of All , You Can Just Be Yourself "Being single this summer means that I can focus on what I truly care about be it family, my internship or my pet rabbit. I may even end up taking a trip to Vietnam, just because," says Valkyrie Anderson, 24, Monterey, Calif.
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"Single-ish" dating blogger John Ortved has fifteen tips for single men when it comes to love and romance. 1. You Don't Have a "Type" No two women are the same. Don't fool yourself into thinking that you have a type. 2. Be a Gentleman" Be excellent in their presence." from The Tao of Steve 3. Don't Mention Other Women Don't talk about other girls. Ever. Not about their cooking. Not about how they looked. Not about how much your parents liked them. And definitely, definitely, not what they were like in bed. 4. Avoid Mean Women "There ain't no good in an evil-hearted woman" Johnny Cash 5. Treat Her Well Small, thoughtful gifts are always a good idea. It's not about the gift; it's about the fact that you were thinking about her. 6. Mind Your Manners "Manners maketh man" William of Wykeham 7. Pay for the Date A guy always pays. Especially in the early dating phase. Once there have been many sleepovers, and you are part of each other's everyday, that can change. But not until then. 8. Believe in Her Best Self "Deep down, every girl feels that she is a great beauty, an actress, a poet or an artist. Your job is to figure out which one, and convince her you believe it too." My friend Pete 9. Try New Things Together Don't let the only thing you do together be "watching TV." Busy people are often the happiest. If you're not exploring the world together, certainly explore the world around you. 10. Hitchcock Presents "You know why I favor sophisticated blondes in my films? We're after the drawing-room type, the real ladies, who become wh*res once they're in the bedroom." Alfred Hitchcock 11. Love Doesn't Have to Be Mysterious There's no such thing as "guy code." 12. Keep Messages Short and Sweet Early on, keep your text messages short and to the point. "Yes," "No," "etc." It helps you seem straightforward and far from wishy-washy. Women want to date Romeo, not Hamlet. 13. Avoid Making Rules You Know You'll Break "I keep making up these sex rules for myself, and then I break them right away. Last year I made a rule that I was going to quit horsing around with girls that, deep down, gave me a pain in the a**. I broke it, though, the same week I made it the same night, as a matter of fact." Holden Caulfield 14. Communicate Don't be afraid to talk about sex. 15. Don't Snoop Never check her text messages, calls, or e-mails. If your trust issues go deep enough to invade her privacy like that, your problems run far deeper than her communications.
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In May 2008, the last time we compared the crop of naturally aspirated four-cylinder compact crossovers , the all-new third-generation Subaru Forester handily conquered the likes of Honda CR-V, Nissan Rogue, Saturn VUE, and Toyota RAV4. Fluke? Hardly. The small-but-stout Subaru only went on to snatch our coveted 2009 Sport/Utility of the Year award. Since those victories, however, the Forester has happily basked in its glory and evolved, um, not at all. Under the sheetmetal reside the same 2.5-liter, 170-horse flat-four, the same four-speed automatic, and the same AWD system. Conversely, the crossover field has since been recast with new and updated players. The RAV4, for instance, received a power bump from 166 horses to 179, and the CR-V's pony count rose from 166 to 180. Then there are the new kids on the block: GM's fraternal twins, Chevy Equinox and GMC Terrain, and Hyundai's second-gen Tucson. The General's offspring get 182 direct-injected horses and up to 32 mpg highway, while the stylish South Korean answers with 176 ponies and as much as 31 mpg. To see which crossover now sits atop this feverish fray, we brought back our residing champ and pitted it against the more muscular CR-V, the all-new Terrain, and the promising Tucson. The Rogue failed to prevail in the last go-'round and received no significant changes, so we did not extend an invitation. And, of course, 2009 was the last year for the Saturn VUE. As for the Equinox and RAV4, we wanted both, but neither was available in four-cylinder/all-wheel-drive guise. Perhaps next time. Until then, let's focus on this contest. After all, the winner may very well surprise you. SPORT/UTILITY OF THE YESTERYEAR As mentioned, the Forester entered this battle as something of a favorite, what with it taking our SUOTY calipers just 12 months ago. But a year is a long time, and a lot can happen in that span -- like an award-winner finishing fourth in a four-car comparison. (Before you start typing angry letters, berating us for getting it wrong, let us remind you that the 224-horse XT turbo played a huge factor in earning the Forester's crown.) This is not to say we no longer like, appreciate, and respect the Forester -- far from it. Rather, in light of new and revised offerings, we simply like, appreciate, and respect it a bit less. In May 2008's test, the Forester's 170 horsepower and 20/26-mpg fuel economy put it near the top of the class. In this 2010 shindig, however, those numbers place it dead last. Further, 2008's test vehicle, a 3308-pound 2.5X Premium, scrambled from 0 to 60 in 9.9 seconds, or a full tick ahead of the VUE. Fast forward 22 months, our 2010 tester -- a 3311-pound 2.5X Premium -- proved considerably quicker (9.3 seconds), but was nonetheless slower than all three of its foes. Whereas before the Subaru's four-speed automatic was competitive, now it seems conspicuously uncompetitive. "Four-speed auto?" questions editor at large Arthur St. Antoine. "C'mon, Subaru. Hyundai has a six-speed." With the XT's turbo, Subaru can get away with the four-speed, but with the X's naturally aspirated mill, it's no longer cutting it. What is cutting it, though, are the Forester hallmarks that helped make it a SUOTY -- 2400-pound towing capacity, 8.7 inches of ground clearance, 0.81g lateral acceleration, 34.4-foot turning circle, and $25,294 as-tested price -- all tops in this field. That said, had we gotten a more appropriate Forester, a comparably equipped $26,690 2.5X Limited optioned with nav, premium audio, and satellite radio, the price would have been just under $30,000. It's likely that for 2011 the Forester will undergo a significant freshening, adopting Subaru's new CVT in favor of the four-speed and a styling update inside and out. To be competitive again, it needs all of the above. ALL-TERRAIN "After driving the Terrain," says contributor Mike Connor, "I really wish we'd gotten the Equinox. I like the way the GMC drives, but I don't care for how it looks; it just appears so long and boxy, whereas the Chevy looks lean and sporty." Assistant Web producer Scott Evans notes, "I like the interior styling, but it feels cramped inside. With the sunroof pocket in the ceiling, the small windows, the big pillars all the way around, and the wide center console, it feels almost claustrophobic." Truck Trend editor Allyson Harwood adds, "Decent six-speed, but I'd prefer to shift manually with paddles rather than that silly plus/minus button on the side of the shifter." Catch our drift? There's a lot we like about the Terrain, but... First and foremost, the price. With such niceties as nav, backup camera, leather, 18-inch wheels, Bluetooth, sunroof, and power liftgate, the Terrain is more than just well equipped. But at $29,945, it carries the highest base price, and at $34,170, it carries the highest as-tested price. But the real kicker: The Tucson includes all those items, sans the dispensable power liftgate, for a whopping $4680 less. Then there are the Terrain's lackluster test numbers. Despite having the most horsepower and best highway mpg number, it puts up neither the quickest acceleration nor the top observed fuel economy. The culprit? Make that culprits, as in 4035 of them: The Terrain is 724 pounds portlier than the Forester. The styling too is a bit heavy-on the eyes, that is. "Exterior design is a real puzzler," says St. Antoine. "Square wheel arches? Makes the body-to-tire gaps look huge along the top." Gripes aside, we did find the Terrain an impressive rig when on the move. St. Antoine remarks, "Supple chassis, with good control and solid steering feel." Evans adds, "I'd call it the sports car of the group, as it handles the best on pavement." If it weren't for the hefty price, disappointing performance stats, and elephantine curb weight, the Terrain would have scored higher. But those are big ifs. UNDER THE TUCSON SUN The Tucson is Hyundai's first crossover to be designed and engineered in Europe, and it shows. From the integrated side-mirror turn repeaters and the three-flash lane-change signals to the Fluidic Sculpture design language and split-spoke 18-inch alloys, the Tucson emanates a personality that could only come from across the Atlantic. And we like it. "Easily the best-looking vehicle of the bunch, inside and out. More than that, the new Tucson is head and shoulders above the old model in design and quality," says Evans. "Love the shark-like surfacing on the sides," adds St. Antoine. Hyundai aimed for high style and succeeded. It also aimed for a sporty personality and succeeded there as well. "It's obvious Hyundai went the sporty route with the new Tucson -- the dynamics feel aggressive," says Connor. The test numbers back up this claim. The Tucson's 0-to-60 (8.8 seconds) and quarter-mile (16.7 seconds at 82.8 mph) times were best of the group, and its lateral acceleration (0.79 g), figure eight (28.5 seconds at 0.58 g), and 60-to-0 braking (120 feet) trail only those of the lightweight Forester. Moreover, of the four CUVs here, the Tucson manages to stay flattest through corners, the byproduct of a firm suspension. Those taut suspenders, sad to say, don't pay dividends in the ride department. Here the Hyundai comes across as too aggressive, transmitting rather than absorbing road imperfections. "Suspension is overly taut and not nearly as composed as the Honda's or GMC's," says St. Antoine. Our judges found fault with the Tucson's electric power steering, as well. "Steering feels artificial, with too many blips in the arc," claims Connor. Other than the ride and steering, and some second-rate interior plastics and seat stitching, there was nothing to fault. The 2.4-liter is refined and peppy, the six-speed silky smooth and responsive, and the price shock and awe. Try to find another under-$30,000 CUV with Bluetooth phone and streaming audio, nav, panoramic sunroof, heated leather seats, satellite radio, and brake hill-hold and hill-descent control. Let us help -- it doesn't exist. The Tucson will inevitably inherit the new Sonata's direct-injected 200-horse 2.4-liter engine within a couple years. So once Hyundai addresses the stiff ride and artificial steering, look out. PREMIUM PRECISION "This is when Honda is getting it all right," says Harwood of the CR-V. Indeed, the Honda's resume utterly impressed our discerning crew. The tweaked-for-'10 DOHC 2.4-liter, which utilizes a higher 10.5:1 compression ratio, larger intake valves, and a higher flow-rate exhaust to swell horsepower to 180, was rated the envy of the assembled 16-valvers. "I adore this engine," says Evans. "Loves to rev and produces good power across the band, making the CR-V feel like the fastest of the group even though it isn't." Perhaps the steering, lauded for its organic, nicely weighted heft that made the Honda "a pleasure to carve through the mountain roads around Wrightwood," per St. Antoine, played a role in making the CR-V feel deceptively quick. And unlike the Tucson, whose ride was at times jarring, the Honda's proved supple, well mannered, and responsive, whether on pavement or dirt. "The most fun to drive off-road and great on pavement too," concludes Evans. Inside the rich, well-executed cabin, which comes replete with nav, backup camera, Bluetooth, satellite radio, heated leather seats, and dual-zone automatic climate control, the Honda's talent show continues. "Surprising elegance at this price level," says Harwood. Evans claims, "Best interior materials in the group. From the quality of the leather to the plastics, the Honda is way above the rest." Connor notes, "Great interior packaging with lots of space (feels wide inside), a roomy, reclining back seat, the most cargo room (love the shelf), and useful storage bins in the center console and dash." Of course, there were a few traits we didn't love. The five-speed auto, for example, lacked a manual mode and shifted with a slight harshness that didn't exist with the Tucson's six-speed. Some found the brakes a wee bit touchy, the styling so-so, and the cartridge-style six-CD changer outdated. But that's the extent of it. "In a class by itself in quality feel, classy interior materials, and carefully wrought details -- looks and feels like a premium piece," says St. Antoine. Harwood summarizes the Honda as follows: "This isn't just the smart decision when looking at crossovers, it appeals to the emotions too. Both sides of the brain would be very happy with the CR-V." True enough. 1ST PLACE: HONDA CR-V 4WD EX-L Composed chassis, premium materials, and a jewel of an engine equal winner. 2ND PLACE: HYUNDAI TUCSON AWD LIMITED Stiff ride and spotty steering handicap an otherwise quick, agile, and choice CUV. 3RD PLACE: GMC TERRAIN AWD SLT-1 GM's boxy newcomer is fun to drive and feature laden, but too heavy and too costly. 4TH PLACE: SUBARU FORESTER 2.5X PREMIUM PZEV With archaic four-speed and basement power, the former champ shows its age. 2010 GMC Terrain SLT-1 AWD 2010 Honda CR-V 4WD EX-L 2010 Hyundai Tucson AWD Limited 2010 Subaru Forester 2.5X Priemium PZEV POWERTRAIN/CHASSIS Drivetrain layout Front engine, AWD Front engine, AWD Front engine, AWD Front engine, AWD Engine type I-4, alum block/head I-4, alum block/head I-4, alum block/head Flat-4, alum block/heads Valvetrain DOHC, 4 valves/cyl DOHC, 4 valves/cyl DOHC, 4 valves/cyl SOHC, 4 valves/cyl Displacement 145.5 cu in/2384 cc 143.6 cu in/2354 cc 144.0 cu in/2360 cc 149.9 cu in/2457 cc Compression ratio 11.2:1 10.5:1 10.5:1 10.0:1 Power (SAE net) 182 hp @ 6700 rpm* 180 hp @ 6800 rpm 176 hp @ 6000 rpm 170 hp @ 6000 rpm Torque (SAE net) 172 lb-ft @ 4900 rpm* 161 lb-ft @ 4400 rpm 168 lb-ft @ 4000 rpm 170 lb-ft @ 4400 rpm Weight to power 22.2 lb/hp 20.1 lb/hp 19.6 lb/hp 19.5 lb/hp Transmission 6-speed automatic 5-speed automatic 6-speed automatic 4-speed automatic Axle/final-drive ratios 3.53:1/2.61:1 4.50:1/2.55:1 3.20:1/2.47:1 4.44:1/3.08:1 Suspension, front; rear Struts, coil springs, anti-roll bar; multilink, coil springs, anti-roll bar Struts, coil springs, anti-roll bar; multilink, coil springs, anti-roll bar Struts, coil springs, anti-roll bar; multilink, coil springs, anti-roll bar Struts, coil springs, anti-roll bar; control arms, coil springs, anti-roll bar Steering ratio 18.1:1 15.7:1 15.9:1 16.5:1 Turns lock-to-lock 3.5 3 3 3.2 Brakes, f;r 12.6-in vented disc; 11.9-in vented disc, ABS 11.7-in vented disc; 12.0-in disc, ABS 11.8-in vented disc; 11.2-in disc, ABS 11.7-in vented disc; 11.3-in disc, ABS Wheels, f;r 7.5 x 18-in, cast aluminum 6.5 x 17-in, cast aluminum 6.5 x 18-in, cast aluminum 7.0 x 17-in, cast aluminum Tires, f;r 235/55R18 99T M+S, Michelin Latitude Tour 225/65R17 102T M+S, Continental 4X4 Contact 225/55R18 98H M+S, Kumho Solus KL21 225/55R17 95H M+S, Yokohama Geolander G95 DIMENSIONS Wheelbase 112.5 in 103.1 in 103.9 in 103.0 in Track, f/r 62.9/62.1 in 61.6/61.6 in 62.4/62.4 in 60.2/60.2 in Length x width x height 185.3 x 72.8 x 66.3 in 179.3 x 71.6 x 66.1 in 173.2 x 71.7 x 65.2 in 179.5 x 70.1 x 65.9 in Ground clearance 6.9 in 6.7 in 6.7 in 8.7 in Apprch/depart angle 14.8/23.2 deg 29.0/21.5 deg 28.1/26.9 deg 24.8/24.8 deg Turning circle 40.0 ft 37.8 ft 34.7 ft 34.4 ft Curb weight 4035 lb 3618 lb 3450 lb 3311 lb Weight dist., f/r 55/45% 56/44% 58/42% 55/45% Towing capacity 1500 lb 1500 lb 1000 lb 2400 lb Seating capacity 5 5 5 5 Headroom, f/r 40.9/39.2 in 38.9/38.5 in 39.4/39.1 in 40.0/37.7 in Legroom, f/r 41.2/39.9 in 41.3/38.5 in 42.1/38.7 in 43.1/38.0 in Shoulder room, f/r 55.7/55.3 in 56.9/56.0 in 57.1/55.1 in 56.1/55.6 in Cargo vol behind f/r 63.9/31.6 cu ft 72.9/35.7 cu ft 55.8/25.7 cu ft 63.0/30.8 cu ft TEST DATA Acceleration to mph 0-30 2.9 sec 3.1 sec 3.0 sec 3.0 sec 0-40 4.6 4.6 4.5 4.6 0-50 6.6 6.7 6.5 7 0-60 9.2 9.2 8.8 9.3 0-70 12.3 11.8 11.8 12.4 0-80 16.1 15.6 15.4 17 0-90 20.2 20.4 Passing, 45-65 mph 5.2 sec 4.8 sec 4.8 sec 4.8 sec Quarter mile 16.9 sec @ 81.9 mph 16.9 sec @ 82.9 mph 16.7 sec @ 82.8 mph 17.1 sec @ 80.0 mph Braking, 60-0 mph 122 ft 123 ft 120 ft 114 ft Lateral acceleration 0.75 g (avg) 0.77 g (avg) 0.79 g (avg) 0.81 g (avg) MT figure eight 28.8 sec @ 0.56 g (avg) 28.8 sec @ 0.57 g (avg) 28.5 sec @ 0.58 g (avg) 28.4 sec @ 0.58 g (avg) Top Gear Revs @ 60 mph 1900 rpm 1850 rpm 1900 rpm 2500 rpm CONSUMER INFO Base price $29,945 $28,455 $26,640 $24,490 Price as tested $34,170 $30,455 $29,490 $25,294 Stability/traction control Yes/yes Yes/yes Yes/yes Yes/yes Airbags Dual front, front side, f/r curtain Dual front, front side, f/r curtain Dual front, front side, f/r curtain Dual front, front side, f/r curtain Basic warranty 3 yrs/36,000 miles 3 yrs/36,000 miles 5 yrs/60,000 miles 3 yrs/36,000 miles Powertrain warranty 5 yrs/100,000 miles 5 yrs/60,000 miles 10 yrs/100,000 miles 5 yrs/60,000 miles Roadside assistance 5 yrs/100,000 miles N/A 5 yrs/unlimited 3 yrs/36,000 miles Fuel capacity 18.8 gal 15.3 gal 14.5 gal 16.9 gal EPA city/hwy econ 20/29 mpg 21/27 mpg 21/28 mpg 20/26 mpg CO2 emissions 0.83 lb/mile 0.83 lb/mile 0.82 lb/mile 0.87 lb/mile MT fuel economy 16.0 mpg 18.1 mpg 17.5 mpg 18.8 mpg Recommended fuel Unleaded regular Unleaded regular Unleaded regular Unleaded regular
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More from Glamour 10 Things He's Thinking When You're Naked 15 Things Men Don't Want You to Know About Them The Dos and Don'ts of Being Single Men's Naked Body Quirks Explained 12 Secret Signs He's Into You [Editor's note: John Ortved is the male half of the writing duo behind the Glamour.com dating and relationship blog, Single-ish . This is an excerpt from that blog.] We have all heard it before, "I'm sorry, I can't. I have work." And yet that's hardly the whole story, in fact, for many of us it's just the beginning. The phrase can mean so many different things: "I don't want to see you," "I have other plans," "I need to keep this casual," as well as "I have work to do." What does it mean when I say it? Well that depends: Not long ago, I went on a first date that I would have to describe as "excellent." We had a ton in common, there was zero awkwardness, we laughed a bunch and when I said goodnight, she leaned in whispered "You smell great," and we made out. Awesome, right? She had described how busy she was on that first date (she met me at 10PM … on her way home from the office), so over the next couple weeks when I suggested that I had a free night here and there, and she responded that she was crushed at work, I took her at her word. A few weeks later, we made dinner plans, but a couple nights before she sent me an email; she was sorry, her status with someone else she'd also been seeing casually had been kicked up a notch she had been legit busy with work but she was bailing on dinner. OK, bummer, but no big deal. And props for being straight up. In this case, "I have work," had meant "I have work … and I'm seeing other people." Between last week and this one, I too became extremely busy, and I found myself in a similar situation, canceling a dinner date (with Whitney, a gorgeous med student) just a few days before because of "work." But my work was uncomplicated I just had too much to get done to fit in a relaxing meal. We moved the dinner to later in the week and ended up having a great time. I was way too busy to think of it at the time, but when I had canceled on Whitney I had just told her I had work to do I didn't offer any reassurances that it was legitimately work that was keeping me. Should I have said more, or would that have been a case of protesting too much? A good rule of thumb is to try to be honest all of the time. More from Bing and MSN Lifestyle Site Search: See more on bad excuses , what he really means and work-life balance .
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Once you start celebrating the holidays with the person you love, it's even more special to share your traditions with them and start your own to look forward to all year. Don't have an annual ritual with your guy yet? Here's a list of 23 suggestions to inspire you to start one. (Um, you don't need to do all of them, unless you secretly found a way to make each day during the holiday season have 10 extra hours in it.) 1. Do a movie-marathon night of your mutual favorite holiday movies, like "It's a Wonderful Life," "Elf" and "Love Actually." (He knows he secretly likes it.) 2. Make a special meal of both of your traditional holiday favorites. 3. Do good together: Volunteer to make holiday visits at a nursing home, provide gifts for a family in need, or help collect for a local coat drive. 4. Agree to skip the shopping and buy yourselves one nice mutual gift like a record player for the house, or a pricey bottle of Scotch to enjoy together. 5. Make a ritual of putting up a particular decoration in your house: an Advent calendar or matching stockings with your names on them. 6. Send your friends and family a funny joint card. 7. Or exchange naughty cards with just each other for fun. 8. Go to a Christmas-tree farm to cut down your own. 9. Bundle up with some travel mugs of (possibly spiked) hot cocoa for a romantic moonlight stroll. 10. Get a grown-up picture with Santa. (You're never too old.) 11. Forget your usual cool and don matching holiday sweaters. Or pajamas, if you're too embarrassed in public. 12. Take a day off work together mid-December to actually relax in the midst of all shopping/traveling/cooking chaos. 13. Go ice skating. 14. Buy each other one special ornament each year so you'll eventually have a collection of memories to decorate your tree with, instead of a jumbo pack of generic bulbs from Target. 15. Fill each other's stockings with your favorite candies before Christmas (and then eat them for weeks). 16. Have a moment of reflection by telling each other your favorite memory of the year that's almost past. 17. Introduce each other to one of your own family's traditions. 18. Exchange at least one homemade gift. 19. Exchange "experience" gifts instead of material gifts: a photography class, a weekend at a B&B, concert tickets, etc. 20. Host an annual party for all your friends with a fun theme, like White Elephant or ugly sweaters. 21. Drive around the ritziest neighborhood in your town to look at the fancy houses' lights. 22. If you aren't so into family time, make the most of the days off by making this your usual vacation slot and jetting off to somewhere warm. 23. After the year's first snowfall, make snow angels in your backyard or the park. Do you have any special traditions with your guy for the holidays? Please share so we can all copy them!
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Who says you have to play by the rules when it comes to dating? Sometimes it pays to do things your own way. Men and women share some new takes on some old guidelines. 1. Wait for the guy to call you "Why does the guy always have to contact the woman after a date? We want to know you had fun just as much as you want to know we did! A cute text a few hours later or a short call the next day does the trick." Jeremy, 23 2. Lie about your busy weekend So, he'll (theoretically) want to go out with you even more. "Get rid of the rule about not giving away your Saturday. As in, don't let him have Saturday for a date because then he'll think you're a loser without any weekend plans." Paulette, 29 3. Call after the obligatory three days "I find it frustrating that there are timelines of when it's too early or too late to ask someone out again. Who knows what these timelines are and who set them anyway? If I like you, I want to ask you out on my schedule (which is right away) and not have anything read into it." James, 35 4. Cook for your man "We love the deal that if we cook, you'll do the dishes, but frankly, we'd love to lose the idea that we always have to be the ones to cook." Kate, 25 5. Let him (always) pay the bill "I'm all for chivalry, but I'm also about equal opportunity. Splitting checks is sexy and not just during these slower economic times. More than anything, the gesture shows me that this is the type of girl willing to put her half into a relationship." John, 23 6. Put on a show to impress "I got so tired of feeling like I had to impress my date with a comedy routine. Once I learned to relax and be myself, that's when the real connections began." Lisa, 29Video: How to Impress your Date> 7. Divide TV time equally "Let's do away with point systems when watching TV together: A girl should not have to sign three hours of her life away to the New York Jets because she wanted to catch an episode of Grey's Anatomy." Greg, 22 8. Go out alone on a first date "I don't think that a first date has to be a 'first date.' A first hangout can be just as great. Bringing friends along really helps ease the stress and pressure." Sophia, 23
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Seems like as soon as a friend gets hitched, the relationship confessions stop. Forget TMI she won't even give you "I." So what's everyone else not talking about when it comes to being married? We found out. Love and Money "I have a habit of hiding money from my husband. I'm an accountant, so naturally I'm in charge of handling the household finances. But he's aware of how much I make and spend. During tax season, I do a lot of extra work on the side, and instead of depositing the checks, I cash some and treat myself to massages, facials, lunches basically anything that doesn't come in a shopping bag that I'd have to explain!" Marisa, 34 DIY "My man is not the most motivated guy in the world, so I bribe him to do things around the house by offering him sexual favors. I currently owe him three for the crown molding he put in the bedrooms!" Elisa, 29 Let's Make a Deal "I'm a staunch feminist, but I took my husband's last name when we got married. The reason: We'd made a deal that if I did, I could name all of our future children. First and middle names, no questions asked. Not even my mom knows about that deal. Everyone probably thinks I'm a traditionalist deep down." Brooke, 28 Bathroom Habits "My husband and I shower together a lot, which isn't exactly what you'd call a secret. But when we're in there, I almost always pee. I guess that's pretty gross, huh?" Laura, 32 Alone Time "I love when my husband has to go out of town for work. I hear friends talk about how much they miss their husband when he's gone and how hard it is to juggle everything. I feel neither of those things. When he's away, it takes me back to the peace of mind I felt when I lived alone. I watch what I want, eat dinner at 10:00 P.M., clean the house or not. It's when I get to be Claire, rather than Claire the wife, and I cherish it. Sorry, honey!" Claire, 30 Pre-Nup for Him "My husband signed a prenuptial agreement. My family has a lot of money, and since my husband came from practically nothing, they forced me to get him to do it. Wow, I've never told anyone that!" Sarah, 29 Soul Mates "OK, I know that this is going to sound cheesy, but I really believe that my husband is my soul mate. I'm lucky to have found him, to be married to my best friend and to be genuinely happy in my relationship. But if I talked about it with the abandon I feel, I'd drive everyone crazy." Tracey, 25
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Whether you're still dating, newly engaged, or already hitched, every woman must know these 50 things about getting married. What you should know about marriage while you're dating If you and your partner don't communicate well, get to work. Communication doesn't get easier over time, and as life gets more serious -- think work, money, kids -- getting hitched to a partner you can't talk to is a marriage DON'T. Before you get engaged, make sure you and your guy can talk about anything -- and make sure you do. Follow us on Facebook. Your proposal -- and wedding -- may not be magical. Your proposal and wedding day will undoubtedly be special and memorable. But there s a caveat: You ve spent so much time building up each moment in your head that when those moments come, they may be as awkward and un-perfect as any first-time experience, says Meredith Bodgas, weddings blogger at Merital Bliss . Relax the flaws in your stories will end up being your favorite parts to recount. Follow us on Facebook. You might not like your engagement ring. Some couples decide to pick out the bride's ring together, but others are intent on a surprise. If you want the jaw-drop shock moment, you run the risk of not being crazy about your ring. If you don't want to chance getting a ring you don't love, consider discussing a proposal with a family ring or solid band instead -- or try dropping hints or discussing the details. Follow us on Facebook. If you don't like your engagement ring, it's OK to change it! Your new fiancé won't feel like less of a man if you don't love your engagement ring and want to switch it -- just be kind in how you let him know. Saying something like "After wearing it for a bit, I think white gold fits in more with the rest of my jewelry" instead of "I hate yellow gold!" will get the same job done, says Kim Fusaro, weddings blogger for Glamour's Save the Date blog. Follow us on Facebook. Some things will change when you get engaged. The minute you flip your Facebook status to "engaged," you'll find that people will respect your relationship more (it's a great feeling!). Bodgas says you'll start to look at money differently and adjust your spending habits knowing a wedding is impending, you'll feel closer to your fiancé, and you won't consider it silly looking at wedding magazines. Follow us on Facebook. Other things won't change at all once you're engaged. Your disagreements won't magically poof away (though you'll never again argue about getting engaged!), and your day-to-day life won't change much either, Bodgas says. Follow us on Facebook. Everyone will want to see you the second you get engaged. You can tweet pictures of your ring or send out as many emails as you want, but people are going to want real, live face-time. To avoid calendar (and stress) overload, try scheduling a mass get-together so all your local friends and family can celebrate at once. Follow us on Facebook. You may have to go out of your way to maintain a life separate from your guy. Dependence is tempting -- and often easy. When you get married, you're likely looking for a comfortable life with your groom, but your independent life and friendships may suffer as a result. Keeping up with them is going to take extra work, so strengthen your most important personal relationships now. Follow us on Facebook. Your friends' and siblings' marriages will be different from your own. Your married friends have been your model for matrimony -- for better or worse. Regardless of how much you and your best friend act like twins (or even if you have a twin), your relationship will be entirely different from theirs. Watch others' interactions and note their advice, but remember you're your own couple. Follow us on Facebook. You may forget how to be spontaneous. "Having a routine for everything leaves no room for spontaneity," says Melissa Melms, relationship blogger for Glamour's Smitten. "But just because you have some necessary routines doesn't mean you can't be spontaneous." Once you're engaged, falling into a rut may become even more likely, especially if you're not yet living together. While you're still dating, get into the practice of being spontaneous to make sure the romance stays alive. Follow us on Facebook. You won't learn certain habits about your man until you're living together. If you haven't yet lived with your man, you can't know everything about him, like whether he's wasteful or frugal at home, how often he talks to friends and family, whether he'll pitch in around the house, and whether he actually goes to bed at the same time as you. Follow us on Facebook. Getting married to save your relationship won't save your relationship. Period. Follow us on Facebook. Add your ring to your insurance policy. "After you call Mom to tell her you're engaged, call your insurance agent and add your engagement ring to your homeowners' policy," says Anne Chertoff, deputy editor for weddings at New York magazine. "Your glowing 'just engaged' look will disappear if you lose your ring, the stone falls out, or it gets stolen." Follow us on Facebook. A short engagement is a good idea if... You're a high-stress person who knows she'll agonize over the details down to the last minute, changing your guest list, or refusing to make the final call on your flowers, your bridesmaid dresses, etc. Spare yourself the anxiety -- and the flip-flopping -- and get married sooner. Follow us on Facebook. You might consider a longer engagement if... You're searching for a home while trying to plan a wedding, you have a baby, or you're involved in any other highly time-consuming life commitments. Wedding planning takes up a lot of evenings and weekends, and if you're going to be stretching yourself beyond your limits or actively reducing the quality of your life to get married sooner, reconsider your target date -- for a better wedding and your sanity. Follow us on Facebook. Getting married young has lots of pros. For instance, your friends haven't already had four summers of a billion weddings to attend. And your biological clock isn't tick-tick-ticking in your ear, so having kids isn't necessarily on your -- and everyone else's -- mind 24/7. But waiting until you're older has lots of benefits too. Holding off on tying the knot until you're more financially stable can make a world of difference in both planning the wedding and mapping your life afterward. Your friends are likely in a better place too and can probably travel and support you with their gifts and afford to participate in the wedding. You also may get taken more seriously as a couple with potential to last. Once you choose a wedding date, stick to it. "Your wedding date is the first anniversary you pick yourself, so you want to make sure you get it right," Fusaro says. "So go ahead and take your time selecting the perfect date." But don't change it! It's a big deal if you ask the members of your wedding party, who've requested time off and may also be involved in other friends' weddings, to shift the date -- if you switch to a different weekend, they may not even be available. You'll care about that little wedding detail you swore you never would. We're not saying you'll end up on Bridezillas, but no matter how much you fight it, you're probably going to fuss over the width of the stripes on the napkins and exactly how many peonies are in the centerpieces. By the end of wedding planning, you'll be able to spot the difference between raw silk and shantung from 10 miles away. Your groom will start to care about wedding details too. Men want to be involved in wedding planning as well -- and may volunteer some kooky ideas. Fusaro's husband suggested a build-your-own-sundae bar for their nuptials; it didn't make the final cut, but it showed he wanted to be included! Many people will offer their wedding planning advice. "That shiny new ring on your finger is a beacon for unsolicited advice," Fusaro says. You'll be fielding wedding planning tips from relatives, vendors, and the person you sit next to on your work commute, but you don't have to take any of it. Don't go shopping for your wedding dress without doing these three key things. First, be certain you really, truly know your budget so you won't try on a dress you can't ultimately afford. Second, make sure you know your venue so you'll pick an appropriate dress. And third, pick your company wisely. (DON'T go with an entourage -- too many opinions will drive you crazy.) When wedding planning, get everything in writing. Prevent nasty wedding budget surprises by getting all arrangements on paper. Reiterate oral agreements, especially with vendors who might not give you a contract, like your makeup artist, to make sure everyone's on the same page and to ensure everyone stays honest, Fusaro says. Give your wedding photographer a must-take list. One thing some brides wish they'd done? Given their photographer a shots-to-take list. Search wedding blogs and sites like Pinterest for inspiration, and put together wedding photo DOs (and maybe a few DON'Ts) for your wedding day so the photographer doesn't miss a thing. Remember to register for gifts...and re-register. And then do it again. Once you register for wedding gifts, guests will start buying items -- and the registry will run low. Instead of getting things you didn't ask for, Chertoff recommends restocking your registry often, especially "about the time invitations go out for any pre-wedding parties -- engagement party, bridal showers -- and for the wedding." And speaking of gifts, you're going to need...... A whole bunch of thank-you notes. Stock up before the engagement parties, bridal showers and bachelorette fetes begin. You'll want to write them right after each event, so the task doesn't seem so daunting. Spend the evening before your wedding with your best friends or sisters. Do something low-key, like having a slumber party (seriously!), or go shopping for honeymoon essentials until the mall closes, or see a movie. DON'T spend the evening before your wedding... Dancing until the sun comes up or trying a new, exotic food you've never sampled or -- heaven forbid -- having your bachelorette party. Sleep, lady, sleep! Relax the day of your wedding. You've been stressed for months, so take this one day for yourself and trust that you've made all the right decisions -- and let everyone else handle the hiccups. You should take a few moments during the wedding to reflect as a couple. Your wedding is going to fly by, and you'll want to take a minute or two to sit back and take in everything that has happened. It's one of the only times in your life that everyone you love will be in one place, so enjoy it, says Lindsey Unterberger, Glamour's deputy online editor. You may experience "postnuptial depression. "No, it's not exactly a clinical diagnosis, but when you've invested so much time dreaming about your big day, and so much emotional intensity planning, it's tough to see the entire shebang come and go in just a few hours. Unterberger beat the blues by focusing on a new project: decorating her apartment. People will start asking you about babies as soon as you tie the knot. They may even start hinting about it at your wedding reception. (Some may be more, um, subtle than others.) Pre-wedding disagreements will still pop up. Just as your pre-engagement scuffles won't disappear after you've got the ring, neither will the things you trip up on once you're married. The good news is, when you're married and in it for keeps, the trivial stuff will actually seem trivial. Your husband may complain about his new in-laws...but he'll put up with them. If you've married a good guy (and we trust you have!), your husband will spend time with the family he's married into, whether or not he loves them as much as you do. (A good husband will do these six things, too.) You have to talk about money. Committing to each other also means committing to long-term financial decisions, and if you and your partner don't see eye to eye on money, you'll be facing an uphill battle until death do you part. You may start fighting about little things you never cared about before. "During the first year of living together, newlywed couples are undergoing some unique major transitions," says Patricia Worthey, Ph.D., a psychologist and certified Gottman relationship therapist in Edmonds, Washington. You won't be the first -- or last -- couple that can't get through the Netflix queue without a squabble, so just chill with a couples massage or a bike ride, and then chat about your communication style. Bottom line: Neither of you likes bickering, and with a conscious effort, you'll get over the hump. You may feel haunted by your parents' marriage. Regardless of how you swear you're nothing like your mother, or your husband couldn't remind you less of your dad, couples feel pressure from expectations derived from their parents' marriages, says Mikki Meyer, Ph.D., a licensed marriage and family therapist. The solution? You just have to talk. You may start drinking more once you're married. But it's not because you're unhappy (phewf!). Sociologists found that because men tend to drink more than women, married women often end up consuming more alcohol than single ladies because their husbands do, and they may do it as a couple. You'll find out things about him you didn't know before... ...and they may leave you scratching your head asking, "Who's this guy in my house?" Well, you've changed over the years, and that means your husband has too. It's a good thing, and it's part of the discovery of marriage -- and chances are he's thinking the same about you. You may start hanging out with other couples more often. Kinda weird, but it happens. But if not all your pals start getting hitched around the same time as you, don't forget 'em! When you go out of town, your husband will call his single friend to hang out. We'd always thought this was true, but the guys over at GQ.com confirmed it in their list of 35 Truths About Marriage. Your sex life may slow down. You can't be passionate every minute of every day -- period. "Couples don't seem to know how to make the transition from the excitement of getting married and being euphorically 'in love' with each other to the more realistic pace of everyday life," says Deborah Dunn, L.M.F.T., a licensed marriage and family therapist in private practice in Raleigh, North Carolina. Just be realistic with your expectations and you'll slide back into a routine that feels like you, whether that's sex every night, weekend mornings -- whatever works. Your stress levels can help -- or hurt -- your chances of marriage success. You have to support each other -- no nagging allowed. It's science. A study from the University of Tennessee, Knoxville, revealed that a stressed-out husband who felt he was being "nagged" by his wife showed decreased relationship satisfaction. Those, however, who were stressed and had a supportive partner by his or her side gave relationship satisfaction the thumbs-up. You're going to have to do unsexy things with each other. Like divvying up chores, draining blisters, or buying each other's less-than-glamorous personal-care items (honey, I need a box of super-plus tampons, please). And at the end of the day, week, month, and year, you're still going to be married...and you're still going to love each other just as much. Everyone, however, has her gross-out point, and marriage doesn't mean you have to lose yours entirely for love, so keeping some boundaries intact is A-OK. If you want to change your last name, you're going to have to do a lot of paperwork. You'll have to change your license, Social Security card, passport, credit cards, IRS info, etc. If you don't feel like tackling the job on your own, services like MissNowMrs will help you take care of it for a fee. If you don't want to change your last name, you're going to have to answer a lot of questions. So, you're not taking his last name? Why's that? Don't you respect tradition? Did you not consider what it'll be like for the baby to have a last name that's different from his mother's? Are you not fully committed to the marriage? Won't the mailman be confused?! Yep, things like that. Splitting the holidays may be an ordeal. In a perfect world, both families would come together for every holiday. But you shouldn't count on it. A few tips from Bodgas: If both families are local, consider spending part of the day with each family. If that's not possible, give one holiday to one family and do another with the other side of the family, or consider simply alternating years. You may have to schedule dates -- literally. In the haze of daily life, date night may fall by the wayside. If it happens too often, you'll start losing your identity as a couple and, subsequently, your romance. Take out your planner -- iPad, Google Calendar, phone, whatever -- and actually block off a date for a night out. This is the most common question you'll be asked: Does being married feel different? "Two years after our wedding, people still ask me this question," says Unterberger. "And I still haven't come up with a good response." Your partner should make you feel like a better person. According to a study from the State University of New York at Stony Brook, the marriages that last are the ones in which your partner helps you expand your definition and value of yourself. We couldn't agree more.
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We're always talking about bad behavior you shouldn't accept from guys, but what about the bad behavior we're sometimes guilty of? Here are 11 things all women should avoid doing in relationships. Dating don't: Forgetting important details It may sound obvious, but if you're going on a first date (especially if it's a blind date), be sure to get his first name before getting together. "I went on an entire date with a law student I met in college and didn't remember his name. Needless to say, we didn't go out again," said Sabrina, 32. Dating don't: Pretending to like something you hate So, you really like a guy and he suggests you go to a sports bar and share a plate of wings, but you're more of a museum and wine bar kind of girl? We say: Go and try it, be a good sport, but if you don't like it, don't pretend to be into it. Otherwise you'll be swallowing a lot of resentment along with those wings as the relationship progresses. Dating don't: Not eating on a date Now, if you really do love wings and burgers, don't pass on them because you're shy. Guys don't really care what we eat, and if yours does, well, do you really want to be with someone who is going to make you feel bad about a burger? Dating don't: Looking at your phone He's in the middle of a (somewhat boring) story about baseball, and you just want to take a quick peek and see if anything good was Instagrammed in the past 10 minutes. We get it. But wait until he's in the bathroom. While you may not care about the playoffs, it's rude to make it so obvious. Plus, his story might reveal something bigger about himself and how he relates to his friends, so listen up. Dating don't: Repeating date spots Never take a new guy to a restaurant you frequented with your ex, especially for special occasions. "Not only will you be uncomfortable, but the staff will be uncomfortable," Erica, 29, told us, "Plus, it's even more awkward with your ex sitting three tables over." Yep, it can happen. Dating don't: Pushing to meet his family & friends Meeting a guy's parents and siblings can tell you a lot about who he is, but this shouldn't happen until about three to six months in. If you start asking after two weeks, it comes across as a little needy, and that's not a good look. Dating don't: Checking in constantly You've gained girlfriend status, and you're hanging out three or four nights a week amazing! But now your girlfriends want to hang out, and before you confirm, you call him to check in. Don't do this. Make plans with your friends and tell him all about it when the "what are you up to this weekend" conversation naturally comes up. Letting him know you've got a life of your own is hot and will keep him on his toes. Dating don't: Dragging him to family events too soon While it's fun to introduce a new boyfriend to your family, you don't have to take him to every event, especially at first. Start with a casual get-together, and then work up to Thanksgiving. He does not need to leave work early to come pick you up for your cousin's baby shower! If you're bored, just think about how he's going to feel. Dating don't: Avoiding the tough topics When you're first getting to know a guy (you know, when you get all glowy just thinking about him), you don't always get into the serious stuff in conversations. But don't avoid talking about what's important to both of you for too long. If you have some major differences, it's better to find out sooner rather than later. Dating don't: Flirting with his friends We get it. The guy you are into probably hangs out with a crew of guys who are also hot, funny, and smart. And flirting is super fun! But if you flirt with his friends, it tells him you're not interested in him. Dating don't: Comparing him with your ex You think your new guy is great, but you really wish he'd start sending you flowers? Well, don't tell him that your ex used to bring you flowers every week. That will not make him want to bring you flowers, promise. Instead, just tell him straight-up that getting flowers makes you happy. Dating don't: Lying Telling him you think his new shirt is cool is one thing. Lying about who you're with, where you're going, or if you're dating other people is quite another.
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More from Cosmopolitan 9 Ways to Live Big on a Budget 9 Foods That Make You Even Sexier 10 Surprising Weight-Loss Tricks 20 Sexy Ideas For Long Hair 30 Ways to Turn Him On Financial expert Zac Bissonnette, author of the new book, How to be Richer, Smarter, and Better-Looking Than Your Parents , shares his tips: • Rethink Your Cell Plan . Most people don'’t have the right plan—, and you could be shelling out too much for extra services that you’re not using. Zac recommends using Billshrink.com. It analyzes your service plan and susses out whether you’re overpaying. Related video: A single person's savings plan Go Crazy With Coupons . Sites like TheCouponClippers.com have great deals on groceries for a small handling fee. Here’s how it works: you spend literally 10 cents to “buy” coupons - —some of them are as big as $2 off. And you can buy loads of coupons for the same thing at once. So if you find one for your fave cereal, you can stockpile the savings. Cut Back on TV Time . It sounds random, but research has found the more TV you watch, the more temptation you feel to go out and buy stuff (like that cute top you saw Lea Michele wearing on Glee last night). That doesn'’t mean you should stop watching TV, but cutting back a little -—and being aware of the influence it has on your budget— - helps.
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Fifteen great nuggets of love advice for single women from famous folks and regular Glamour readers. 1. Don't Chase Anyone "Guys are like subway trains. Don't run after them; another one is on its way." canuck, on glamour.comVideo: How to Protect Yourself> 2. Don't Waste Your Time "If he says he isn't ready for a relationship, believe him." Kerri Otto, 32, Traverse City, Mich. 3. Long-Term Litmus Test "Marry someone you want to sit next to for the rest of your life." Megan Smollins, 26, Astoria, N.Y. 4. Heed Your Grandparents "My grandfather had some gems: 'Don't be with a stupid man just to be with any man.' 'A real man always takes care of his family.' 'You don't want to be walked over, and you don't want a man you can walk over, either.' And my favorite: 'Don't be a fool, Michelle. You can be anything you want, but don't be a fool.'" Michelle Porter, 28, Charlotte, N.C. 5. The Necessity of Laughter "Don't trust anyone who doesn't laugh." Maya Angelou 6. Go Geeky "The guys who were nerdy in high school make the best husbands." Jennifer Goldstein, 31, Brooklyn 7. Love Yourself "To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance." Oscar WildeVideo: How to Be Single and Happy> 8. Kindness Counts "You can tell a lot about a guy by how he treats your cab driver." Alanna Sobel, 25, Washington, D.C.Video: Survival of the Kindest> 9. No Games "If he likes you, you'll know. If he doesn't, you'll be 'confused.'" sayitloud, on glamour.com 10. Believe In Your Worth "Respect yourself. I said to my ex, 'I'm not going to make you my everything if I'm only your something.'" Alyssa Stabile, 19, Boston 11. Try a Nice Guy "I used to be into bad boys but kept getting burned. Then I heard this: 'Say no to the guys you usually say yes to, and yes to the ones you normally say no to.' I did, and it totally worked. I have a great husband now." Laura Knudsen, 27, Charlottetown, Prince Edward Island 12. Avoid Loners "Never marry a man who has no friends." Father Pat Connor, 79-year-old Catholic priest, as quoted by Maureen Dowd in her New York Times column 13. Just Say No to Ink "Never tattoo a guy's name on your body!" Rebekah Rankin, 27, Scottsdale, Ariz.Video: Stop Torturing Yourself> 14. Hygiene Is Non-Negotiable "Personal hygiene is part of the package." Jim Carrey 15. Be Yourself "It's OK to show up at a guy's house with a dozen roses and declare your undying affection. It's OK to have too much to drink and call your ex 20 times and then to be mortally embarrassed when you realize your number must have shown up on his caller ID. It's OK, because making a fool of yourself for love is ultimately about you, how much you have to give and the distances you will travel to keep your heart wide open when everything around you makes you feel like slamming it shut and soldering it closed." Veronica Chambers, Glamour's features director and author of The Joy of Doing Things Badly More from Bing and MSN Lifestyle Site Search: Get additional content on falling in love, great date ideas and love advice. {none}
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Pickup lines can be pretty creepy any night of the year, but when Halloween rolls around, they can quickly go from bad to worse. Here's a ghastly roundup of some of the worst offenders we've heard recently.by Anna Moeslein Prince Not-So-Charming "So, what do you turn into at midnight?" Boo to You "You look so boo-tilicious!" No Thanks! "There's no trick in these pants." Not-So-Sweet Tooth "Your treat or mine?" No Bones About It "The skeleton over there didn't have the guts to get your number for me, so here I am." Your Turn Don't wear a costume. When somebody asks what you're supposed to be say, "Cute." Said to an Angel "You must love Halloween! You don't need to change to dress up as an angel." Overheard from a Pirate "Arrrrgh! Wanna search me for buried treasure?" Overheard from a Ghost Want to be part of my costume? I'll let you under my sheets. Funny stuff! Be careful about what you wear, ladies and gents you never know what kind of pickup line can go with it. Happy Halloween!
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1. Take an iPod time-out. Put in your ear buds, and lose yourself in your favorite tunes. A slower tempo will relax you, but music that’s heavy and throbbing will let you work through anger or annoyance so you can get those negative emotions out of your system quickly, explains Los Angeles psychologist Yvonne Thomas, PhD. 2. Slick on red lip gloss. Red lips exude confidence and sex appeal. The reaction you get from others will help replace your bad mood with sexy self-assuredness. 3. Crack up in front of your computer. It’s impossible to feel bad when you’re laughing, so download a video from funnyordie.com or collegehumor.com. 4. Switch on your desk lamp. Harsh overhead lighting can amplify stress and irritation, while a softer glow can help soothe you. 5. Surround yourself with yellow and orange. Studies show that people become more joyful in these warm, bright colors, explains Leatrice Eiseman, author of More Alive With Color, possibly because they remind us of the sun. If you don’t have a yellow or orange garment to wear, pick up flowers in these hues. 6. Visualize your happy place. Maybe it’s a tropical beach or your childhood bedroom. Whatever the location, close your eyes and conjure up the image. Changing your mind’s wallpaper to a place you adore will make you happy, says Thomas. 7. Have a quickie. If sex isn’t possible, reveling in the memory of a sack session also will flood your system with blissful sensations, says life coach Martha Beck, PhD, author of Finding Your Own North Star. 8. Put on clothes you look hot in. Every chick has something in her closet that nets her positive feedback from friends, coworkers, and random strangers. Change into it — even if it’s just a pair of sex-kittenish heels — and enjoy the ego boost. 9. Snack on citrus fruits. They can improve your mood, says psychologist Dale Atkins, PhD, author of Sanity Savers. And because they take time to peel, you’ll likely eat slowly and not end up pigging out. 10. Breathe away bad vibes. Inhale slowly and deeply for five seconds, then exhale for five. You’ll breathe yourself into a more affirmative mind-set, says Atkins. 11. Be a nature girl. Eat lunch in a park. Lie on the grass in your backyard and watch birds fly overhead. Exposure to the outdoors will lower your heart rate and defuse a pessimistic outlook, says Atkins. More from Cosmopolitan The Secret to Frizz-Free Hair and Other Hot Weather Beauty Dilemmas - Solved 9 Foods That Make You Even Sexier Cheap and Easy Ways to Get Happy "These Beauty Products Changed My Life!" 30 Ways to Turn Him On
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[Editor's note: Shallon Lester is the female half of the blogging duo behind Single-ish , a dating blog on Glamour.com. This is an excerpt from that blog.] Thinking about a romantic retreat with a new love? Here are some handy tips for maximizing your next getaway with a guy. Enjoy! 1. Don't get ahead of yourself "This can't be just shagging," Bridget Jones famously declared of her weekend vacay with Daniel Cleaver. "A mini-break means true love." Well, I think we all know how that turned out. But Bridge was half right taking a girl on a tiny vacay isn't something a casual hookup is likely to do. But it doesn't necessarily mean he's super-serious, so don't go into it with sky-high expectations. Take it one day at a time and don't force a "talk" if it doesn't feel right. 2. Remember that it's a vacation, not a fashion show Yes, you have a whole closet full of stunning stilettos, sparkly necklaces and killer dresses but I bet he doesn't really care. Most likely, he's excited to hang out with you and relax, not wait as you spend an hour getting ready for dinner at the local cafe. And I bet he doesn't want to listen to you complain about how much your feet hurt either. Ditch the couture and focus on each other instead. 3. Do your research There's nothing worse than walking around a new city and having no idea what you're looking at. Invest in a guidebook and read up before you arrive. You'll avoid looking like a tourist, and you'll impress him with your oh-so-unexpected knowledge of this bridge or that statue. Plus, you can map out all of the best shopping ahead of time sneaky! 4. Branch out I've never understood people who travel only to recreate exactly where they live they stay in chain hotels and eat at chain restaurants and don't do anything out of the ordinary. Why leave?! Instead, play bocce ball with the locals, crack crabs at the hole-in-the-wall seafood shack, or cowboy up with a horseback ride on a regional trail. Remember, experiencing new things together equals bonding! 5. Unplug It's not much of a vacation if your BlackBerry and laptop come along for the ride. Bring your cell, just in case you need it. But don't bust it out in the middle of a tour or during a meal! Keep use to a minimum. 6. Snap away! I'm talking photos, not arguments. Sometimes taking pics with a digital cam can feel too "These will all go on Facebook to prove how serious we are!" So grab a disposable camera they're a little more casual and you can both recapture the feeling of giddily awaiting for the pics to be developed. Plus, actual photos are much easier to frame.
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In order to help us navigate the world of these new methods of expression, online dating service Zoosk conducted a survey of more than 6,000 singles. The general result? Selfies are everything. For online dating profile pictures, 75 percent of women and 62 percent of men have used a selfie, whereas within their profile only 18 percent have used emojis. A whopping 84 percent of people would rather see a selfie as a profile pic than something more formal. However, there are some things people don't want to see where selfies are concerned. Behold, four important rules of using selfies based on the percentage of people surveyed who said you shouldn't do it: *No sexy/kissy face. (33 percent) * No messy house in the background. (32 percent) * No selfies in front of the bathroom mirror. (22 percent) * No nudity or showing too much skin. (13 percent) Got it? Go clean your room, put on some clothes, and strike a pose now. (Zoosk even has some selfie makeup tips, if you'd like) And just for fun, the most beloved and disdained emojis? Women like the blushy face, men like the kissy face (cuter on a cartoon face than a selfie, I guess?), and nobody likes the cat with the heart eyes, which really doesn't explain why I feel like the only person in the world who isn't obsessed with cat videos and cats generally. What are your thoughts on selfies as online dating profile pictures? Yea or nay? More from Glamour: 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own 25 Celebrity Hairstyles That Will Make You Want Bangs 11 Dating Don"ts You Should Stop Doing Now 8 Hair Color Ideas To Try This Fall 21 Style Don"ts to Live By The Best Celeb Haircut for Your Texture
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There are good gifts--and there are game-changers. Cosmo readers and editors share the creative presents that left a lasting impression. Wine Backpack "My BFF gave me a picnic basket and a wine backpack. I was surprised because it wasn't something I would have asked for (or even thought about) but I loved getting something adventure-y. I've used it a million times!" Gena K., Steal this idea: Picnic Plus Brava Wine & Cheese Backpack Set, walmart.com, $40 Doggy Daycare "Last Christmas, my uncle gave me a gift card for doggy daycare. Not only did it give my dog a chance to be social and play all day (I'm pretty sure she thinks doggy daycare is heaven!), but my fiancé and I got to plan a special day trip…and that night we watched a movie without my dog slipping a stinking dog toy into my lap. Whenever relatives ask us for gift ideas, this is the first thing we mention!" --Natalie B., Steal this idea: Google "doggy daycare" and your hometownRelated: Cute Guys and Their Cuter Dogs Keyboard "One year my parents got me an electric keyboard. I had been really into music when I was younger, but I had stopped singing and playing piano once I started working full time. Having the convenience of a keyboard at home got me practicing piano, singing and digging out my old sheet music again. I eventually auditioned for a choral group and my passion for music was reignited!" --Emilie B., Steal this idea: Yamaha Keyboard, amazon.com, $124 Scrapbook "In high school, my neighbor gifted me with my first scrapbook-- and now I have over 30. As silly as it sounds, this gift opened up a whole new world to me. Scrapbooking has become a really nice escape when I'm stressed and it's a wonderful way to compile my memories. I can't tell you how much I love going back through all those pictures and mementos." --Lauren F., Steal this idea: Pioneer Postbound Album with Ribbon, target.com, $20Related: How to Beat Holiday Stress Luxe Beauty Gift "One Christmas my sister gave me a Clarisonic, and my mom gave me a Sonicare toothbrush. I opened the packages and was like--wow, my Christmas is so--hygienic. I knew both gifts were expensive, but it still felt kinda clinical and not super-exciting. Fast-forward two years later, and I'm obsessed with both to the point that I have a hard time sleeping if I skip them in my nighttime routine." --Mina A., Steal this idea: Clarisonic Mia, clarisonic.com, $119 Fancy House Stuff "My friend gave me super-fancy lavender laundry detergent-- which made all my clothes smell delicious and somehow expensive. It was a great gift because it felt like such a luxury-- something I loved to have, but would never normally spend the money on. I've given it as a gift to other people since then!" --Marie K., Steal this idea: Lavender Laundry Set, mrsmeyers.com, $20Related: Tips to Lose Weight During the Holidays Cozy Slippers "My little sister got me Dearfoams slippers for Christmas one year. They aren't the sexiest things in the world, so at first I was like, um, thanks for nothing. But they are sooo comfortable--and now, the first thing I do when I come home is take off my shoes and slip on my Dearfoams. I've had them for years and I appreciate that she knew me well enough to know that a cozy, relaxing gift was the perfect choice for me. They are life-changing!" --Meredith C; Steal this idea: Fair Isle Boot, dearfoams.com, $38 High-End Hairbrush "I got a Mason Pearson hairbrush from my mom for my 28th birthday—these are super-luxe and have an amazing reputation and are like ten times the cost of a drugstore one. It was kind of an inside joke from my mom-- I've always been the worst at brushing my hair and she thought a fancy hairbrush would remind me. Not only has it reminded me, but my mom passed away just a few weeks later, so whenever I use it, I think of her. And since it's made well and built to last I know I'll have it forever, so that's cool, too." --Anna D; Steal this idea: Mason Pearson Junior Bristle & Nylon Hair Brush, amazon.com, $96Related: What Your Hair Says About You Tech Gear "A couple of years ago when I was writing my dissertation, my computer crashed and I completely freaked out --of course I had not backed up my work because I didn't have the right stuff and it felt complicated. So for Christmas, my husband Ryan got me an Apple Time Capsule, which functions like an external hard drive, and set it up to wirelessly back up everything on my computer daily. This has been a life-saver for me, and the best part was that he did all the work to set it up for me." --Kate S.; Steal this idea: Time Capsule, apple.com, $299 Crazy Adventure "One year my boyfriend took me skydiving. I would never in a million years have done that on my own...and I'm still surprised and shocked that I did it. It's so not up my alley (I'm terrified of roller coasters). But once the free fall ended and the parachute opened, the world seemed so peaceful and beautiful. I'll never do it again but I loooove being able to tell people that I've gone skydiving. It made me free fearless." --Sarah B; Steal this idea: Google "skydiving lessons" and your hometown.Related: 40+ Worst Holiday Gifts Major Plant "When I first moved to Boston, my mom gave me a cut of one of her plants (a pothos). I named it Trooper because it seemed to be able to last through anything (forgetting to water it, a cat knocking it over, being smushed in a moving truck between apartments). Before I had a pet (or a husband!), it gave me something to take care of. People always think of flowers as a gift idea, but plants last so much longer. Plus, it's the gift that keeps on giving: you can cut off part of a pothos, stick it in water to let it root, then replant and give to someone else as a gift. One of my friends in Boston has Trooper the Fifth..." --Katherine N; Steal this idea: Look for a garden shop or florist in your area--pothos are common, easy-to-care-for plants that should be available for under $40.
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With the addition of the 1.5-liter EcoBoost I-4 in 2014 , the automaker has finally phased out the 1.6-liter EcoBoost I-4 and six-speed manual option in the 2015 Ford Fusion sedan. Initially, the new 1.5-liter EcoBoost and six-speed automatic replaced the 1.6-liter EcoBoost and automatic , while the 1.6-liter was only available with a manual transmission. A six-speed automatic is the sole transmission offering as the manual transmission is no longer available in the Fusion. Other updates include a standard rearview camera and configurable daytime running lamps. A set of 10-spoke, 16-inch alloy wheels replaces the Fusion S' steel wheels. 2015 Ford Fusion SE models gain a standard six-way power passenger seat, while the Fusion Titanium gains a standard 10-way power passenger seat. Four new exterior colors (Bronze Fire Tinted Clearcoat Metallic, Guard, Tectonic, and Magnetic) have been added. All-wheel drive is now available on the 2015 Ford Fusion SE Appearance and Fusion SE Luxury packages when equipped with the 2.0-liter EcoBoost engine. A new Terracotta Package (Terracotta leather-trimmed seats and door inserts, premium floor mats, and 18-inch painted and machined-finish alloy wheels) is available on the 2015 Ford Fusion SE and Titanium trims. The base naturally aspirated 2.5-liter I-4 makes 175 hp and 170 lb-ft of torque, while the 1.5-liter EcoBoost I-5 is rated 181 hp and 185 lb-ft and the 2.0-liter EcoBoost I-4 is rated 240 hp and 270 lb-ft. EPA-rated fuel economy for the 2.5-liter is 22/34 mpg city/highway and the 1.5-liter is rated 24/36 mpg , while the 2.0-liter with front-drive is rated 22/33 mpg and the 2.0-liter with all-wheel-drive is rated 22/31 mpg. 2014 Ford Fusion models shown. Source: Ford
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Chrysler is recalling roughly 895,000 model-year 2011-2014 Jeep Grand Cherokee and Dodge Durango SUVs to rewire the vanity mirror lights due to a fire risk. The Problem: The wiring for vanity mirror lights in certain Grand Cherokees and Durangos can short out if the mirror or headliner has been serviced. If not properly reassembled, the wiring may short-circuit and lead to a fire. Chrysler notes that the risk isn't present in vehicles that haven't had either part serviced, and that it's aware of three injuries related to the issue. The Fix: Chrysler will contact owners and install a spacer in all vehicles that will keep the wires properly routed and prevent short-circuiting. The fix will be carried out on all vehicles within the range, regardless of whether the headliner or vanity mirror has been serviced previously. Owners can call Chrysler at 1-800-853-1403 for more details. Number of Vehicles Potentially Affected: approximately 895,000 2011-2014 Jeep Grand Cherokee and Dodge Durango SUVs are covered by the recall. Of those, an estimated 651,000 are located in the U.S., with 45,700 in Canada, 23,000 in Mexico, and 175,000 outside the NAFTA region. Source: Chrysler
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Busy lives call for easy tricks to organizing the craziness around us. To help make your life a little bit easier, we found 10 stylish ways to keep your home neat and tidy. The Laundry Room The laundry room may not be your favorite space (it might not even be an actual room but a corner in your basement!), but you make it more inviting by keeping it organized. Use pretty linen-covered boxes to store fabric softener sheets, cleaning supplies and even a sewing kit. It ll leave your shelves looking orderly and open. The Pantry Whether it s tucked away in the pantry or out in the open, it s easier to prepare meals when your shelving is neat and tidy. Replace product boxes with glass containers to show off your favorite dry goods in a fashionable way. Bonus points: They ll also keep out any unwanted pests. The Kitchen If you re anything like us, you re probably lacking in storage space for all of your dishes and glassware. Screw wooden or metal baskets into your wall for a simple way to manage all of your favorite tabletop pieces in a country-esque way. The Bathroom, Part I Keep your guest bathroom neat and tidy with an under-the-sink organizing system that s anything but utilitarian. Use printed trays for miscellaneous products, such as hairbrushes or soap, and install shelving on the backs of cabinet doors. Tip: Apothecary jars dress-up cotton balls and swabs while keeping dust out. The Bathroom, Part II Still looking for additional storage? Try a wall-mounted rack of painted gardening pots for easy access to everyday bathroom items. The Office Organization is key to a productive workspace. Utilize baskets and affordable stacking drawers to group supplies and paperwork out of sight, but not out of mind. Flower Arrangements Who says flowers can only be displayed on a tabletop? Ideal for tiny homes, skip the hard-to-store and space guzzling vases. Let your walls bloom with a sweet DIY test tube wall planter that will transform your space with happy single stems. Just for Jewelry Jewelry boxes and dressers make for excellent storage, but sometimes you just want easy access to the baubles you wear on a daily basis. Try a feminine tiered cake stand to display your accessories in a delicious way. The Craft Room If you re a die-hard DIY-er, a crafting area is a must. Keep your materials in a state of order with a framed pegboard for customized storage options.
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The last shot for Fast & Furious 7 has been completed, according to a post on the "Fast & Furious" franchise's Facebook page. Likely to be the last installment of the series, "Fast & Furious 7" will open April 3, 2015. The highly anticipated film was delayed several months after lead actor Paul Walker died in a fiery crash late last year. Following Walker's death, Universal as well as the rest of the Fast & Furious family had to decide whether to scrap the movie or figure out how to complete it without one of its core characters. In order to move forward, Walker's brothers Caleb and Cody stepped in to help complete the last few scenes starring Walker's character Brian O'Conner . The production team used computer-generated imagery to make Walker's brothers look more like him for the film. Much of the original Fast & Furious crew returns for the seventh film including Vin Diesel, Michelle Rodriquez, and Jordana Brewster, as well as many stars from the previous films including Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson, Ludacris, and Lucas Black. New cast members include Jason Statham, Nathalie Emmanuel, Djimon Hounsou, Kurt Russell, and more. Source: Facebook Images from previous Fast & Furious movies shown.
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Our 2013 Nissan NV200 might be fully loaded but it still rides on black steel wheels with plastic hubcaps. Nissan currently doesn't offer a wheel or tire option for the NV200 cargo van, so we contacted the pros at the Tire Rack to see if they could help us make our van look more professional and less plastic. Shockingly, this wasn't going to be an easy task. Assumedly to avoid over-complicating things, our Nissan NV200 is equipped with 185/60R15C 94/92T Euro-metric commercial tires made by America Cargo paired with a 15x5.5-inch steel wheels with a 5x114 bolt pattern. Due to the euro-metric OEM tires, we learned that at time of writing this update, there isn't a single U.S. tire manufacturer that offers a tire that can match the euro-metric commercial tire load needed for our van. Our tire size isn't the issue. You can get P-Metric P185/60R15 tires from any manufacturer, but our van needs a commercial rated tire and this is where it can get tricky. P-Metric Vs. Euro-metric Commercial P-Metric tires have two ratings: Standard and Extra Load. Standard ratings are used on passenger vehicles with limited payloads, whereas the Extra Load rating is used primarily for light trucks with limited payloads. Euro-metric tires have higher load-carrying capacities than their dimensionally equivalent P-metric and LT-metric tires in North America. Load-carrying capacity is the amount of weight a tire can support according to the tire's load index (the higher the tire's load index number the greater its load carrying capacity), and they also require higher tire pressures for the rears to carry heavy loads. It is not recommenced to switch from Euro-metric to P-metric. Why is this important? The load rating of the tire affects your payload capacity. Our NV200 cargo van has a stock payload of 1477 pounds, and with our racks and shelves adding 132 pounds to the cargo van, our payload capacity drops to 1345 pounds. Factor in 200 pounds for a driver, and you're left with a maximum capacity of 1145 pounds for your cargo. According to our NV200's tire size (185/60R15C 94/92T), the van's load index is "94/92" (1389/1477 pounds). A P-metric tire size of P185/60R15 with a load index 84 will roughly drop our load-carrying capacity to 1003 pounds -- and that's before we factor in the racks, shelves, and driver weight. See where I'm going? Putting P-metric tires on a vehicle that requires Euro-metric load-rated tires can dramatically reduce your payload capabilities. So with this in mind, we decided to stick with our OEM tires to retain the value of our van's cargo-carrying abilities while upgrading our van's exterior appearance with set of alloy wheels. Since no U.S. tire manufacturer carries a tire to fit our load-index needs, we had to purchase a new set from our local Nissan dealer ($714). With the help of the guys from TireRack.com, we went with the 5-spoke MSW Type 19 15x6.5-inch silver wheel. It is an inch wider than the OEM steelies but will still fit on our van's narrow wheel wells. The MSW Type 19 15x6.5s retail for $91 each and include installation hardware. With our van filled with fresh rubber and new wheels, we went to 2 Brothers Tire Services in Gardena, California to have the wheels and tires mounted (with stock TPS sensors), balanced, and installed for $70. Now we are stylin'. 2013 Nissan NV200 SV Service life: 18,465 mi Avg CO2: 0.83 lb/mi Energy cons: 145 kW-hr/100mi Unresolved problems: None Maintenance cost: $157.49 (2-oil change, tire rotation, inspection) Normal-wear cost: $0 EPA City/Hwy/Comb Fuel Econ: 24/25/24 mpg Average Fuel Econ: 23.3 mpg
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Cindy Crawford s modeling heyday may have been in the 1990s, but her career hasn t slowed down one bit. And now, the 48-year-old is busier than ever you ve no doubt seen the infomercials for Meaningful Beauty, her skin care brand, but Crawford is also the brand ambassador for Urban Remedy, a healthy juice company, and even has her own line of furniture. During a recent event in New York City for Meaningful Beauty, Crawford (yes, she still has her signature mole!) sat down with Everyday Health to reveal her biggest skin care secret, the product that s made her hair feel insanely soft, and more. 1. The best advice her dermatologist ever gave her: When asked what her biggest skin care secret is, Crawford gave all the credit to her dermatologist of 20 years, Jean-Louis Sebagh. The biggest secret Dr. Sebagh told me which isn t anything you put on your face is to pick a weight that you can maintain and stay there, she says. Don t make it your skinniest weight because that s not maintainable. Try to stay within five pounds [of your weight] so that you re not asking your skin to stretch and contract. RELATED: Celebrity Dermatologists Reveal Skin Care Secrets 2. The reason her hair is in such great shape: The thing that no one told me is that as you get older, the texture of your hair changes and then as you color it, it becomes much more fragile, says Crawford, whose hair looks every bit as shiny and voluminous as it did back when she was strutting her stuff on the runway. She keeps her strands in tip-top shape by washing less frequently and applying a hair mask before shampooing. A couple of hairstylists have even noticed a difference, she says. 3. How she preserves the life of a blowout: I m more conscientious about using heat on my hair now, says Crawford. So to keep her style looking as fresh as it does on day one, Crawford sleeps with her hair up in a loose bun using Emi-Jay hair ties, which are made from soft material that won t leave dents. 4. The healthy way she starts each morning: I m not one to just do a master cleanse because I d get in a bad mood, explains Crawford. Instead, she begins her days with a mint chocolate chip meal replacement smoothie from Urban Remedy. That s my school day go-to drink, she says. Crawford also adds leftover chicken to a kale salad when she wants a protein-packed meal.
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Everyone knows how to lose weight. The formula is simple and has been well communicated to all of us: burn more calories than you eat each day. That s right eat a little less, move a little more. Think beyond calories out Cardiovascular exercise is the key to burning calories, but you may get as much benefit, if not more, from yoga. A recent study at the Fred Hutchison Cancer Research Center in Seattle found that an ongoing yoga practice correlates nicely with a healthy weight and not only because of the calorie burn. Yoga practitioners were found to be more aware of what they were eating and better able to stop when they were full, characteristics that the study attributes to mindfulness. When you practice yoga, you are developing a deeper and much more subtle awareness of your body, explains Ashley Turner, M.A., a Los Angeles yoga teacher who drew on her experience as a mind-body psychotherapist to create the DVD Yoga for Weight Loss (Element). Smoothing out the brain waves and calming down the nervous system give you an opportunity to notice the moment of choice, she adds. You get to ask yourself, Do I really want to eat more? Most of us never even encounter that moment. Turner suggests doing 45 minutes of yoga, three times a week. Listen to your body talk Once you learn to hear your body s signals, it s time to really pay attention to the messages it s sending you. I believe we are all born with the wisdom that we need to eat well, says Elyse Resch, M.S., R.D., the Beverly Hills, Calif.-based co-author of Intuitive Eating: A Revolutionary Program That Works (St. Martin s Press). We know what is satisfying, what we need and how we feel when we eat, she adds. We just have to tune in to our inner voice. Step one: Forget dieting. Diets fail 95 percent of the time, Resch says. Give yourself permission to eat the foods you like, but eat them only when you re moderately hungry, not ravenous, and enjoy them slowly, in a calm environment, she adds. Take time to check in with your hunger signals, and quit eating when the food is not tasting quite as good. Whenever you eat through a bag of chips, the first one is always better than the last. Put it in writing The advice to keep a food journal or diary is not new but bears repeating because it s been proven to work. And here s a twist on the traditional advice, from Paula M. Pavelka, R.N., a Tennessee-based certified health counselor and founder of Body Mind Soul Living Inc.: Write down what you ate and when, and how you felt as you ate it, then go back and record how you feel an hour or so later. For example, Pavelka says, An entry might be, I ate a Starbucks scone with a latte. At first I felt energized, then a little nervous and jumpy. Two hours later, I felt blank, dumpy and sluggish. When you write things down, they click in your head. Review your journal frequently to chart your progress (or lack thereof), look for unhealthy patterns and continually update your goals. Eat like your grandparents Your grandma probably told you to eat three meals a day and not snack in between, says John Douillard, D.C., an Ayurvedic physician in Boulder, Colo., and author of The 3-Season Diet (Three Rivers Press). That is how we ve historically eaten. Douillard notes with despair the trend toward eating smaller and more frequent meals. Now we re all being told to eat six times a day, he says. This never gives the body time to dip into its fat stores. Eat before you are going to use the energy you get from food, Douillard advises. That means having a good breakfast (to jump-start metabolism), a large lunch (to fuel your day s activities) and a small dinner (to help your body naturally wind down at the end of the day). Treat yourself like a good kid Beating yourself up over food is another knowledge-behavior gap many women fall into. Calling yourself greedy or a fat pig or weakwilled only makes you feel bad about yourself, which often leads to eating more in an attempt to give yourself a boost. It s important to stop the negative self-talk, says Freida B. Herron, M.S.S.W., L.C.S.W., a weightmanagement coach for Women s Way Coaching in Knoxville, Tenn. I often suggest imagining that your desire to overeat is a lovable 5-year-old child, she says. You don t want to berate or shame your appetite that only leads to more dysfunctional eating. Instead, treat yourself with understanding, respect and affection. Uncover hidden causes of weight gain If you re doing all the right things and you still can t lose weight, there may be an underlying health reason. Here are some likely suspects: TOXINS New studies indicate that toxins in the body suppress thyroid function, slowing metabolism. Scientists now believe that the obesity epidemic is going hand in hand with an increase in environmental toxins, says Gaetano Morello, N.D., the British Columbia, Canadabased author of Whole Body Cleansing: Transform Your Health Through Gentle Purification and Effective Detoxification (Active Interest Media). To help your body eliminate them, take a tablespoon of psyllium fiber mixed with water every day (fiber binds to toxins so they can be excreted) and consider doing a detox. Morello recommends Enzymatic Therapy s Whole Body Cleanse ($30 for the two-week program, enzymatictherapy.com). Don t fast, however: Fasting can slow your metabolism and cause more toxins to be released from fat stores, Morello says. FOOD SENSITIVITIES Your weight problem may be more about bloating than fat if you have food sensitivities, says Elson Haas, M.D., of San Rafael, Calif., author of The False Fat Diet: The Revolutionary 21-Day Program for Losing the Weight You Think Is Fat (Ballantine Books). False fat refers to the bloating and swelling that occur when your body treats a food as an allergen and starts holding onto water to protect itself, Haas says. Highly suspect foods include soy, dairy, sugar, eggs, corn, peanuts and especially wheat. To find out if you have food sensitivities, go on an elimination diet, Haas recommends. Cut out all of the sensitive seven foods from your diet for two weeks, then add them back in one at a time. He suggests watching for any stiffness or congestion in the following three to four hours and after waking up the next morning. Cut the food from your diet and watch water weight fall away, Haas says. CANDIDA If you find yourself craving sweets or other carbs, yeast (Candida albicans) might be the culprit. Yeast can migrate into the small intestine, where it latches on to the lining and creates micro-punctures what we call leaky gut syndrome, explains Hawaii-based Carolyn Dean, M.D., N.D., co-author of The Yeast Connection and Women s Health (Square One). Through these little tears, yeast s toxic waste products can get into the bloodstream. This creates a foodsensitivity setup and leads to out-of-control eating false fat and real fat, in other words. To find out more about how and why to cut sugar from your diet, go to naturalhealthmag.com/sugardetox. HORMONE IMBALANCES According to Maine OB-GYN nurse-practitioner Marcelle Pick, M.S.N., author of The Core Balance Diet: 4 Weeks to Boost Your Metabolism and Lose Weight for Good (Hay House), thyroid and adrenal dysfunction and imbalanced female hormones can also cause weight gain. So can a lack of feelgood neurotransmitters. Serotonin deficiency in particular can cause you to crave sweet foods, Pick explains. To determine whether your hormones are out of whack, see your health care provider for appropriate testing and treatment. Supportive supplements for weight loss Ginger Sheila Kingsbury, N.D., chairwoman of the botanical medicine department at Bastyr University in Seattle, recommends taking two 250-milligram capsules twice a day. Green tea Green tea speeds metabolism, and it works really well in tea form, says Gaetano Morello, N.D. Probiotics Taking a probiotic supplement may help you burn more calories, says Cynthia Sass, M.P.H., R.D. Take one with at least 5 billion live organisms per dose once a day. Garcinia cambogia (aka Citrimax) It helps some people feel less hungry, says Elson Haas, M.D. Plus, it helps the body metabolize fats. Take a 250- to 500-milligram capsule before every meal. Gymnema Gymnema helps keep blood sugar levels stable so you can stick to three meals a days without snacking, says Ayurvedic physician John Douillard, D.C. Take one 500-milligram capsule three times a day with meals.
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Don't Get Burned The spotlight on sun damage is burning brighter today than ever before. Not only do we know more about the harmful effects of the sun, but also we have more information and products available to help fight back. Of course, keeping out of the sun, covering up exposed skin, and wearing a good sunscreen are your best bets for protecting yourself against harmful rays, but there is one line of defense you could be forgetting: your grocery cart. Whether you have a long day in the sun ahead of you, or you ve already been burned, with the help of Maria-Paula Carrillo, M.S., R.D.N., L.D., we ve listed seven foods that work from the inside out to help repair your skin and build up its defense against the sun. 1. Sweet Potatoes Cancer-causing compounds called free radicals are the enemy when it comes to sun damage. They not only cause damage to skin cells, but also cells inside the body. One of the best ways to help your body fight off free radicals is through consuming a variety of antioxidant-rich foods. An antioxidant is any chemical that can neutralize free radicals, turning them from unstable particles that damage healthy cells into stable particles that are esstially harmless, according to the book Feed Your Face. One of the major antioxidants is beta-carotene. Sweet potatoes are packed to the brim with beta-carotene, so chow down this summer! 2. Green Tea Green tea is often applauded for its ability to rev up your metabolism, but it's also a powerful skin food. Green tea contains a high concentration of catechins, which boast anti-inflammatory, anti-aging, and antioxidant effects that fight off free radicals from the sun. It also contains polyphenols, plant compounds that some studies suggest may be effective in preventing cancer because they limit the blood supply to different areas where cancer can develop, explains Carrillo. Shy away from bottled, processed teas because the polyphenol count changes once it s been on the shelf--it's lower," warns Carrillo. "Brew fresh tea instead. 3. Sunflower Seeds These crunchy little seeds contain the powerful antioxidant vitamin E. One ounce of hulled sunflower seeds contains about 10 milligrams, which is about two-thirds of your recommended daily intake. Sprinkle over salads, mix into oatmeal, or eat by the handful. It's best to get your dose of vitamin E from whole foods, versus supplements, to reap the most benefits. Other potent sources include nuts, eggs, green leafy vegetables, avocados, and whole grains 4. Tomatoes Lycopene is another important antioxidant to have in your diet regularly, especially during the summer, and tomatoes are one of the best sources. As a rule of thumb, the redder the tomato, the more lycopene it contains. Additionally, lycopene is more easily absorbed by your body when the tomatoes have been cooked, so reach for tomato paste, juice, soups, and sauces pre-beach day. Research presented at the Royal Society of Medicine in London found that consuming tomato paste significantly enhanced the skin s ability to protect itself from harmful UV rays and also helped reduce redness from sun damage. If you can only eat so many tomatoes in a week, Carrillo suggests watermelon as another great source of lycopene. 5. Salmon While antioxidant-rich foods are central to protecting your skin against the sun, it s also important to consume healthy fats. Foods like salmon, tuna, walnuts, and flaxseed are all good sources of omega-3s and will help maintain that healthy layer of fat underneath the skin and thus prevent skin damage and aging, says Carrillo. 6. Asparagus Asparagus is another great source of vitamin E who knew? The green stalks are one of the most effective foods when it comes to neutralizing cell-damaging free radicals. When in doubt about which foods contain which antioxidants, reach for a variety of whole foods. There's no single food," says Carrillo. "But fruits and vegetables are going to be your biggest sources of antioxidants." 7. Water Water, water, and more water. The sun dehydrates you, and dehydrated skin is more sensitive and prone to damage. Your body is mostly water, so by staying hydrated, you re making your skin healthier," explains Carrillo. "It s going to prevent loss of moisture, which makes skin wrinkly. Good hydration is essential.
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Ah, summer! Sun-kissed skin, wash-and-wear hair and a glow that comes from the inside out. It s the time of year when most of us are our most naturally gorgeous. But it s also time to be extra vigilant about your skin- and hair-care regimens, says New York City-based makeup artist Mally Roncal, founder of Mally Beauty. Hot, humid days and lots of wind can take their toll, leaving your complexion and hair dry and damaged, she says. To the rescue: expert-approved tips and tricks to help you outsmart the elements and look hot no matter how high the temperature rises. HOT, SWEATY SKIN When it s scorching outside, it s easy to feel like you re wilting. Even if you take scrupulous care of the skin on your face and body, everyone can fall prey to that sweaty, oily, grimy feel at the end of a long, hot day. The not-so-pretty result? As you perspire, your makeup slides around on your face or disappears all together, your foundation and powder get cakey and you re left feeling (and looking) fried. A tried-and-true makeup artist tip is to keep a spray bottle of water (with a few drops of essential lemon or peppermint oil mixed in) in the fridge. With one spritz, you ll experience an immediate cooling sensation; it also has the added benefit of setting your makeup. Try it right before you leave the house or car and see how much longer your makeup lasts. There s also a host of cooling beauty products on the market, and each offers a fast fix when you re feeling overheated. Consider trying one with tingle-inspiring ingredients such as aloe vera, cucumber and green tea. (a) JASON Tea Tree Therapeutic Cooling Mineral Gel ($12; jason-natural.com) quickly penetrates chapped, sunparched skin, offering instant relief. (b) skyn ICELAND Hydro Cool Firming Eye Gels ($30; beauty.com) give the sensitive under-eye area a de-puffing and refreshing wake-up call. (c) Liz Earle Sun Shade Botanical Aftersun Gel ($25; lizearle.com) contains organic aloe vera and cucumber to refresh thirsty, sun-sapped skin. (d) Shaveworks The Cool Fix ($25; sephora.com) is a gel-based cream to use after shaving that helps prevent ingrown hairs, razor burn and redness. (e) Almay Wake-Up Hydrating Makeup ($13; drugstore.com) is a lightweight foundation that s loaded with aloe vera, which cools skin as it provides light to medium coverage. (f) Yes To Cucumbers Completely Cooling Body Butter ($13; drugstore.com) contains reviving cucumber, hydrating spirulina and green tea, a potent antiinflammatory. TOO MUCH SUN You know it s crucial to slather on the SPF but who hasn t gone to bed a little pink after a fun day in the sun? To soothe sunburned skin, apply a super-hydrating lotion or oil that provides ample moisture and antioxidants to help heal skin, says New York City-based dermatologist Howard Sobel, M.D. Most important, of course, is to make sure you re applying (and reapplying) broad spectrum protection before you go outside, which blocks both UVA and UVB rays. Opt for a sunscreen with a physical block, such as titanium dioxide or zinc oxide, which sits on top of the skin and fends off the sun s harmful rays most effectively. Using a moisturizer or foundation with SPF 15 or higher is fine for a day when you re mostly inside, says Sobel. But when you know you ll be in the great outdoors, apply a stronger sunblock at least 20 minutes before heading out. Reapply every two hours to stay protected. (a) Caudalie VinoSource Quenching Sorbet-Creme ($40; caudalie-usa.com) takes away that tight, parched feeling. (b) Lavanila The Healthy Lip Screen SPF 30 ($16; lavanila.com) protects your pout with mineral sunscreen and soothes lips with vanilla and peppermint. (c) colorescience Pro Mineral Powder Sun Protection SPF 50 ($60; colorescience.com) is a handy sunblock that provides both UVA and UVB protection. (d) Kiehl s Rosa Arctica Rehydrating Reactivation Cream ($60; kiehls.com) contains Haberlea rhodopensis, a flower that helps minimize moisture loss. (e) AHAVA Mineral Suncare Aftersun Rehydrating Balm Body & Face ($28; ahavaus.com) protects against moisture loss caused by exposure to the elements. (f) Garnier Nutritioniste Moisture Rescue Lightweight UV-Lotion SPF 15 ($8; walgreens.com) is a lightweight, oil-free gel that helps keep skin hydrated SCORCHED, STRAWLIKE STRANDS The sun saps the life out of hair the same way it damages skin, leaving it dry, faded, crunchy and limp. That s why it s important to apply a UVblocking product on your strands when you know you ll be in direct sunlight, says New York City-based celebrity stylist Oscar Blandi, owner of the Oscar Blandi Salon. Plan on diving into a pool or the ocean? Wet your hair with fresh water first it will fill the cuticle and help stave off the damage that chlorine or saltwater can create, says Blandi. After shampooing and conditioning, douse your shining glory with a deep conditioner or repairing treatment. But don t rinse it out all the way, suggests Blandi. Leave a little in your hair to coat and protect it from sun exposure the next day. Another secret weapon: dry shampoo. In summer, it s best not to wash your hair every day, as shampooing too often can strip hair of its natural (and naturally moisturizing) oils. Dry shampoo absorbs excess sweat and sebum on the scalp, helping to give your roots a lift. (a) Oscar Blandi Capri Sun Shield Spray ($20; oscarblandi.com) protects strands with vitamin E, avocado and jojoba oil. (b) Aveda Color Conserve Strengthening Treatment ($26; aveda.com) keeps hair shiny with a combination of sunflower and macadamia nut oils. (c) Rene Furterer Okara Radiance Enhancing Spray ($26; beauty.com) is a leave-in treatment that uses protein-rich soybean extract to strengthen hair from the inside out and is loaded with vitamin E, which prevents fading. (d) Philip Kingsley Swimcap ($35; philipkingsley.com) is applied in sections before exposure to sun, chlorine and wind, and protects hair from the elements until it s washed out. (e) Davines Nou Nou Conditioner ($25; davines.com for salon locations) uses tomato extract to protect hair s color. (f) John Frieda Luxurious Volume Anytime Volume Refresher ($7; drugstore .com) lets you skip a wash (or two) and adds instant oomph and volume.
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Can't keep a good thing down In the continuing quest for the novel, shiny new products come to the market as old products slip out of production. Some of those that go are classics you may not have noticed were gone. The good news is that if they disappear when they are still wanted, and the right person or group takes up the cause, sometimes they come back. There is still room and demand for some of these things from the '40s, '50s and '60s. Most of the following brands and items that have returned from the dead have benefited from nostalgia, but a few of these are popular with young people who might not even know, or care, that they were designed half a century ago or more. Here are a few of their stories, involving reclaiming family legacies, reviving lost formulas and tracking down old employees to help bring back original manufacturing methods and recipes. Astro Pops When an established candy brand disappears from the market, it tends to be a one-two punch, hitting consumers not just in the sweet tooth but right in the nostalgia bone. That's what spawned the latest comeback of the space-age favorite Astro Pops, which debuted in 1963. "It was kind of a selfish thing. It was my favorite candy growing up," said Ellia Kassoff, CEO of Leaf Brands. Kassoff noticed the pops had dropped off the market and spontaneously asked about buying the rights. When he called Spangler Candy about the candy's disappearance, Kassoff was told it wasn't part of the company's "marketing mix." That explanation often causes products to disappear, Kassoff explains. Companies merge, and some lesser products get neglected when allocating the marketing budget. Or else the manufacturer changes the product so much over time that they alienate the consumer. "With that, products just leave the market for no reason except a decision at corporate," Kassoff said. Kassoff didn't acquire the Astro Pops machinery because it had been sold it for scrap, but Spangler offered the trademarks, formulas, and help getting the pops up and running again. The product is now distributed by Kassoff's company Leaf Brands (Kassoff also acquired the rights to Leaf, a brand established by an earlier generation of his family). Up next from Leaf are more comebacks: Tart n' Tinys are debuting at the Sweets and Snacks Expo in June, and after that will come the return of Wacky Wafers in July, Hydrox cookies in August, and then Bonkers. Kassoff had to find someone who used to work on Bonkers, since the formula was lost somewhere along the changing of hands of its parent companies, when Life Savers was sold to Nabisco. When an established candy brand disappears from the market, it tends to be a one-two punch, hitting consumers not just in the sweet tooth but right in the nostalgia bone. That's what spawned the latest comeback of the space-age favorite Astro Pops, which debuted in 1963. "It was kind of a selfish thing. It was my favorite candy growing up," said Ellia Kassoff, CEO of Leaf Brands. Kassoff noticed the pops had dropped off the market and spontaneously asked about buying the rights. When he called Spangler Candy about the candy's disappearance, Kassoff was told it wasn't part of the company's "marketing mix." That explanation often causes products to disappear, Kassoff explains. Companies merge, and some lesser products get neglected when allocating the marketing budget. Or else the manufacturer changes the product so much over time that they alienate the consumer. "With that, products just leave the market for no reason except a decision at corporate," Kassoff said. Kassoff didn't acquire the Astro Pops machinery because it had been sold it for scrap, but Spangler offered the trademarks, formulas, and help getting the pops up and running again. The product is now distributed by Kassoff's company Leaf Brands (Kassoff also acquired the rights to Leaf, a brand established by an earlier generation of his family). Up next from Leaf are more comebacks: Tart n' Tinys are debuting at the Sweets and Snacks Expo in June, and after that will come the return of Wacky Wafers in July, Hydrox cookies in August, and then Bonkers. Kassoff had to find someone who used to work on Bonkers, since the formula was lost somewhere along the changing of hands of its parent companies, when Life Savers was sold to Nabisco. Yuengling Ice Cream Some favorite processed foods are not allowed to die, like the famous example of Twinkies after Hostess went bankrupt , or the boomer kiddie cereal Quisp. But this February, a product returned that many didn't realize had ever existed: Yuengling's Ice Cream. Yuengling is known for beer on the East Coast, but the company began making ice cream during Prohibition. "Before we reintroduced it, I wouldn't say there was a large demand for Yuengling's Ice Cream, specifically, said David Yuengling, president of Yuengling's Ice Cream. "People in the Pottsville area would often ask if I'd ever restart the family business. One day, Rob Bohorad (Yuengling's Ice Cream's COO), came and told me he'd been thinking the same thing. With our business experience and love for the company, we went through all of the details and realized it was a good time to bring it back." Consumer response in its distribution area of Pennsylvania, New York, New Jersey, Delaware, Maryland, Virginia, West Virginia, Massachusetts and Washington, D.C., has been amazing, said Yuengling. "We couldn't have anticipated the popularity. People were excited before it was even on the shelf. Once it hit the stores, we sold out extremely fast and had to rush to ramp up production to keep up with the demand." The ice cream uses natural ingredients and local hormone-free milk. It doesn't incorporate beer, but their most popular flavor is Black and Tan: Belgian chocolate and salted caramel ice cream swirled together. Some favorite processed foods are not allowed to die, like the famous example of Twinkies after Hostess went bankrupt , or the boomer kiddie cereal Quisp. But this February, a product returned that many didn't realize had ever existed: Yuengling's Ice Cream. Yuengling is known for beer on the East Coast, but the company began making ice cream during Prohibition. "Before we reintroduced it, I wouldn't say there was a large demand for Yuengling's Ice Cream, specifically, said David Yuengling, president of Yuengling's Ice Cream. "People in the Pottsville area would often ask if I'd ever restart the family business. One day, Rob Bohorad (Yuengling's Ice Cream's COO), came and told me he'd been thinking the same thing. With our business experience and love for the company, we went through all of the details and realized it was a good time to bring it back." Consumer response in its distribution area of Pennsylvania, New York, New Jersey, Delaware, Maryland, Virginia, West Virginia, Massachusetts and Washington, D.C., has been amazing, said Yuengling. "We couldn't have anticipated the popularity. People were excited before it was even on the shelf. Once it hit the stores, we sold out extremely fast and had to rush to ramp up production to keep up with the demand." The ice cream uses natural ingredients and local hormone-free milk. It doesn't incorporate beer, but their most popular flavor is Black and Tan: Belgian chocolate and salted caramel ice cream swirled together. Schlitz In the 1980s, Coca Cola ( KO ) infamously set the benchmark and made branding history for messing with a formula that wasn't broken. But a lesser-known example is that of Schlitz, the "beer that made Milwaukee famous" and the preferred beer of dads and uncles of the 1970s. To save money, the original flavor was sacrificed decades ago in favor of a shorter fermentation process, and resulted in a beer that went flat faster. To get back the original formula in 2008, Schlitz head brewer Bob Newman consulted retired brewers, then added back more of what was lacking: malt, hops and flavor. Upon the beer's comeback, according to NBC News , hometown Milwaukee stores were out of stock in days and were keeping waiting lists for the next shipments. As a "resurrection products" side note, Schlitz is now owned by Pabst Brewing Co. Pabst, in turn, is owned by the food industry investor C. Dean Metropoulos , who in 2013 teamed up with Apollo Global Management to bring back Twinkies, Ding Dongs and Cupcakes. Earlier this year, he announced he was selling Pabst Brewing Co. Dansk Kobenstyle cookware The iconic brightly colored Homer Laughlin dinnerware FIESTA went out of production in 1972, but after becoming a hot collectible in the 1980s, FIESTA returned to the market with new colors ( not to mention lead-free glazes ) in 1986. In 2012, Dansk made a similar savvy move in bringing back its Kobenstyle cookware collection, which was originally introduced in 1956. Vintage bold-colored enameled Kobenstyle pieces, with their distinctive three-point side handles, have remained in favor for their perennially popular Danish modern design. The appeal of the reissued and expanded Kobenstyle line is cross-generational. "We have the consumers who remember the line and love that we re-introduced it and those consumers not familiar with it, especially the millennials, also love the design and think it is new and distinctive in the crowded world of cookware," said Glenn DeStefano, president of Dansk Brand. "And they love it even more when they find out about its rich heritage." De Stefano says the line is doing "fantastic" at retailers like Crate & Barrel, Anthropologie ( URBN ), Bloomingdale's and Macy's ( M ). Polaroid instant film Technology progresses ever onward, leaving a wake of obsolescence, but sometimes there continues to be a market for products deemed obsolete. Take the example of Microsoft's ( MSFT ) Windows 7, which Hewlett-Packard ( HPQ ) recently brought "back by popular demand" after Windows 8 missed the mark with consumers. (Microsoft owns and publishes MSN Money.) Then there's the benchmark-setting success story of Polaroid Film, which was rescued from the history's dustbin by The Impossible Project. "Although Polaroid no longer saw commercial value in the 200+ million Polaroid cameras distributed around the world, it represented a big opportunity for a small, start-up company," said Impossible Project CEO Creed O'Hanlon. But apart from that, the founders of Impossible were "genuinely enthusiastic about this analogue medium and far from seeing it as 'dead', wanted to ensure that it would not only still be available for future generations but would also develop and adapt to their needs." O'Hanlon says the reaction has been very positive, and projects 2014 sales of more than 1.2 million instant films, and more than 35,000 refurbished classic Polaroid cameras, with plans to launch its own analog instant camera. Why bring back instant film in the digital age? "When everyone can make a clean bright digital photo and shoot it around the world in a millisecond, Polaroid pictures have come to feel special, because they're unique and hard to copy," says Christoper Bonanos, author of "Instant: The Story of Polariod." "Plus every one is a physical object -- when you shoot someone's photo and give it to him or her, it's a little gift, and everyone likes getting a one-of-a-kind present." Technology progresses ever onward, leaving a wake of obsolescence, but sometimes there continues to be a market for products deemed obsolete. Take the example of Microsoft's ( MSFT ) Windows 7, which Hewlett-Packard ( HPQ ) recently brought "back by popular demand" after Windows 8 missed the mark with consumers. (Microsoft owns and publishes MSN Money.) Then there's the benchmark-setting success story of Polaroid Film, which was rescued from the history's dustbin by The Impossible Project. "Although Polaroid no longer saw commercial value in the 200+ million Polaroid cameras distributed around the world, it represented a big opportunity for a small, start-up company," said Impossible Project CEO Creed O'Hanlon. But apart from that, the founders of Impossible were "genuinely enthusiastic about this analogue medium and far from seeing it as 'dead', wanted to ensure that it would not only still be available for future generations but would also develop and adapt to their needs." O'Hanlon says the reaction has been very positive, and projects 2014 sales of more than 1.2 million instant films, and more than 35,000 refurbished classic Polaroid cameras, with plans to launch its own analog instant camera. Why bring back instant film in the digital age? "When everyone can make a clean bright digital photo and shoot it around the world in a millisecond, Polaroid pictures have come to feel special, because they're unique and hard to copy," says Christoper Bonanos, author of "Instant: The Story of Polariod." "Plus every one is a physical object -- when you shoot someone's photo and give it to him or her, it's a little gift, and everyone likes getting a one-of-a-kind present." Saab Volkswagen updated their iconic Beetle, and Indian brought back their Chief model motorcycle after a four-decade absence. But not long after the lower profile Saab ended production in 2011, new Saabs have begun shipping to Swedish customers , and they're going to Chinese drivers next. Why the relaunch? Auto journalist Richard Read offered CNBC insight on the revival of Saab: 1. Saab is a quirky brand with a very distinct look. That has limited Saab's appeal in the marketplace and made it a little "niche", but it's also done wonders to create a base of passionate fans. People either don't get the appeal of Saabs or they can't live without them, there's not a lot of middle ground. 2. It didn't turn a profit for GM ( GM ), so Saab had little value as a car company, but with 6 decades of history, it had huge value as a brand. 3. That brand value is why Spyker bought Saab from GM and, in turn, why it was purchased from Spyker by National Electric Vehicle Sweden AB (which isn't Swedish, but a mash-up of Chinese and Japanese investors). So why is Saab coming back? Three reasons: Because the brand has retained so much value. Because electric vehicles are likely to be big business. Because Saab isn't Chinese. Even the Chinese associate Chinese products with iffy quality, so-so safety, and dull styling. However, Read doesn't foresee a domestic market. "Saab has been a fairly tough sell here in the U.S., so if it returns, it's not likely to fare much better -- especially if it keeps the same quirky styling. I imagine it being smaller than Volvo (which is tiny nowadays), more in line with perhaps Fiat, or even its flashy sibling, Alfa Romeo, which is returning to the U.S. this year." Volkswagen updated their iconic Beetle, and Indian brought back their Chief model motorcycle after a four-decade absence. But not long after the lower profile Saab ended production in 2011, new Saabs have begun shipping to Swedish customers , and they're going to Chinese drivers next. Why the relaunch? Auto journalist Richard Read offered CNBC insight on the revival of Saab: 1. Saab is a quirky brand with a very distinct look. That has limited Saab's appeal in the marketplace and made it a little "niche", but it's also done wonders to create a base of passionate fans. People either don't get the appeal of Saabs or they can't live without them, there's not a lot of middle ground. 2. It didn't turn a profit for GM ( GM ), so Saab had little value as a car company, but with 6 decades of history, it had huge value as a brand. 3. That brand value is why Spyker bought Saab from GM and, in turn, why it was purchased from Spyker by National Electric Vehicle Sweden AB (which isn't Swedish, but a mash-up of Chinese and Japanese investors). So why is Saab coming back? Three reasons: Because the brand has retained so much value. Because electric vehicles are likely to be big business. Because Saab isn't Chinese. Even the Chinese associate Chinese products with iffy quality, so-so safety, and dull styling. However, Read doesn't foresee a domestic market. "Saab has been a fairly tough sell here in the U.S., so if it returns, it's not likely to fare much better -- especially if it keeps the same quirky styling. I imagine it being smaller than Volvo (which is tiny nowadays), more in line with perhaps Fiat, or even its flashy sibling, Alfa Romeo, which is returning to the U.S. this year." Mid-century modern furniture A number of modernist furniture classics have remained in production since their midcentury debuts, but some get a new life as a reissue, like the Hans Wegner Swivel Chair . Prominent design brand Herman Miller holds the rights to perennial classics like the Eames Lounge (pictured) and other pieces that have not been produced in decades. After a fallow period in the 70s and 80s when interest in mid-century modern pieces waned, it's been enjoying a consistent resurgence in recent two decades, and particularly in the last five years. While many designs had remained in production commercially, Herman Miller began reentering the consumer market and reintroducing discontinued models. Noguchi's glass-topped coffee table is a perennial favorite, so it wasn't surprising when last year Herman Miller reissued another Noguchi, the Rudder Coffee Table, which debuted in 1949 and was last seen in 1951. "Look at the Rudder or the Noguchi glass top coffee table, when I show somebody that piece and tell them it's from 1948, they find that shocking, it seems so contemporary," said Mark Schurman, director of corporate communications at Herman Miller. "That's the real quality that people appreciate." "Many of the young people don't think of that as 'that was cool in the '50s,' they just think they're cool." The interest in midcentury design shows no signs of waning. "There's an appreciation for design that's more streamlined, less adorned, more natural in its shape form and function, less ornate," Schurman said. "Some of that may be part of the ebbs and flows of popular aesthetic. In international design circles there's a real flowering of more and more contemporaries that seem to be embracing those same ideals, [and] us [Herman Miller] too." A number of modernist furniture classics have remained in production since their midcentury debuts, but some get a new life as a reissue, like the Hans Wegner Swivel Chair . Prominent design brand Herman Miller holds the rights to perennial classics like the Eames Lounge (pictured) and other pieces that have not been produced in decades. After a fallow period in the 70s and 80s when interest in mid-century modern pieces waned, it's been enjoying a consistent resurgence in recent two decades, and particularly in the last five years. While many designs had remained in production commercially, Herman Miller began reentering the consumer market and reintroducing discontinued models. Noguchi's glass-topped coffee table is a perennial favorite, so it wasn't surprising when last year Herman Miller reissued another Noguchi, the Rudder Coffee Table, which debuted in 1949 and was last seen in 1951. "Look at the Rudder or the Noguchi glass top coffee table, when I show somebody that piece and tell them it's from 1948, they find that shocking, it seems so contemporary," said Mark Schurman, director of corporate communications at Herman Miller. "That's the real quality that people appreciate." "Many of the young people don't think of that as 'that was cool in the '50s,' they just think they're cool." The interest in midcentury design shows no signs of waning. "There's an appreciation for design that's more streamlined, less adorned, more natural in its shape form and function, less ornate," Schurman said. "Some of that may be part of the ebbs and flows of popular aesthetic. In international design circles there's a real flowering of more and more contemporaries that seem to be embracing those same ideals, [and] us [Herman Miller] too."
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The Glamour office has been abuzz with wedding talk ('tis the season, right?). So we asked our fellow editors to tell us the moments they remember most fondly as wedding guests. Take a look and get inspired. Their first-flirtation emails It included a dramatic reading by the bridal party of the email exchange between the bride and the groom when the groom first asked the bride out and the online flirtation began. It gave the wedding such a personal touch. As a guest, I felt I had a glimpse into love at first email. Rebecca Sinn, entertainment editor Everyone got into the pool At a friend s destination wedding in Costa Rica, the reception was held at a beautiful estate in the hills with an incredible view and an infinity pool. By the end of the night, everyone was in the pool, including the bride and groom! Jillian Cornejo, bookings editor Laughter during the ceremony When my cousin got married in Chapel Hill, North Carolina, first the bride lost her veil in the hotel room the morning of the wedding (she didn t panic what a cool gal), and then the wedding party spent the ceremony making mistakes and laughing. It felt so earnest and so them. They re a couple who love to laugh, and a serious ceremony wouldn t have been the way to kick off their life together. Meredith Turits, online associate editor The surprising entertainment A bearded rock musician with the voice of an angel covered pop songs like Britney s Hit Me, Baby (One More Time) during cocktails at Glamour editor Lauren Vreeland s wedding. Incredible, awesome, and unforgettable. Rachael Wang, fashion editor The theme was wild (literally) In college, I worked a catering gig for a fancy wedding outside Boston. The grounds were gorgeous, the champagne was flowing, and the bride and groom were very polished and stately except for the fact that their big day was monkey -themed. The couple shared a love of primates and incorporated this passion point into their festivities in more than a few ways: life-size bride-and-groom stuffed-animal monkeys were pulled in a wagon down the aisle during the ceremony (replacing the flower girl). The guest gift was a tiny stuffed monkey from FAO Schwarz. And the pièce de la résistance: In addition to the wedding cake, there was a banana split bar, to honor the monkeys food of choice. The contrast from formal to whimsical was a hard one to forget. Susan Cernek, fashion development director …the bus ride! "I went to a wedding in London, and the bride rented a red double-decker bus to take all the guests from the ceremony to the reception. When we boarded the bus, we were given a cute little bag with a traditional English crisps (a.k.a. chips), candy bars, and a premixed cocktail. Knowing how hard it is to drink on a bus, the bride even included red-and-white straws for everyone." Lindsey Unterberger, deputy online editor Debuting as a flower girl "I was a flower girl at my Aunt Erika's star-studded bash in the early '80s. I was only three years old, but I swear I remember walking into the Helmsley Palace hotel in my tiny white Christian Dior dress with a basket of rose petals and holding my twin brother's hand. It was so huge and so grand, and when 300 people turned around at the same time to say, 'Aww,' it scared me so badly I turned and bolted. My mom had to carry me down the aisle. Fortunately, my public-appearance skills have improved since then, but I still do have a special place in my heart for a grand, dramatic wedding." Kat Thomsen, digital managing editor Performing the ceremony "I performed the wedding of my friends Andy and Sarah. I was ordained online, and we wrote the ceremony together, but I was so nervous on that day, I took a slug of bourbon beforehand with the groomsmen. It worked! People told me after that they thought I did it for a living. Some even tried to hire me." Lauren Iannotti, deputy editor, articles An impromptu venue (and law) change "Last year, my friends Josh and Anthony planned to get married in a ceremony in Connecticut, where gay marriage was legal, and have the party in New York City, where they lived, loved, and worked but where their marriage wasn't legally recognized. And then, a few weeks before their planned nuptials, New York legalized same-sex marriage yay! The fancy-pants estate ceremony gave way to New York City based 'I dos' in a public park, with an aisle made of rose petals and a bunch of squirrels among the witnesses. It was one of the first New York City gay weddings, and people walking through the park stopped to watch. I saw total strangers tear up at the scene and burst into cheering and applause at the end of the ceremony. And then we went down the street for barbecue and bluegrass so basically, your typical NYC wedding, right?" Anne Sachs, online editorial director A dance party in the downpour "I was the bartender at a wedding held outside a couple's home on a hot Missouri summer day. They had huge outdoor tents, personalized fly swatters, Mason jars, and sunflowers very outdoorsy DIY style, but it was so fitting for the afternoon. The bride's dress was simple but gorgeous lace with a green bow. The band played folk music. The best part was when it started to thunderstorm that evening. Rather than bemoan the ruined outdoor reception, everybody embraced the sudden rain. It became a fun party they even had us bartenders join in the drinks and festivities. It was so much fun, and I felt like a part of the festivities, even though I didn't even know the couple or their family and friends." Anna Moeslein, assistant online lifestyle editor Pets in the processional "There was one during which the couple's dogs walked down the aisle in matching tuxes! It was such a silly, sweet, personal moment that everyone there couldn't help but smile and remember not to take life too seriously." Tracey Lomrantz Lester, contributing style editor The matron of honor's over-the-top speech "My college roommate's matron-of-honor speech by her sister was amazing. She worked with the DJ to create a speech soundtrack, and when she said key words, snippets of songs she selected played to accompany her point. Like every great toast should, it brought tears and laughter and ended with taking shots to "Shots" by LMFAO." Ashley Edwards Walker, editorial assistant Foreign customs at an intercultural party "My cousin married a woman from Argentina, so my family made the journey for the wedding. I loved the Argentinean customs, but my favorite was all the garters. Instead of one, the bride wore seven one for every color of the rainbow. The groom removes each garter with his teeth while the bride holds a glass of red wine in one hand and a glass of white wine in the other. The best part is the couple then get to set up seven guy friends and seven girl friends. The men also have to use their teeth to put one of the garters on their matched girls while the girls hold glasses of wine. What a fun way to set up your friends!" Lauren Bernstein, fashion and beauty writer The accident that lit up the sky "I'll always remember my sister's wedding because it's my sister's, duh! But also because my stepdad accidentally set off two minutes of fireworks…right in the middle of the ceremony. And it was broad daylight, too, so we couldn't even see them! All we heard was lots of very loud bangs and lots of laughter." Jessica Duncan, associate editor Nostalgia the non-cheesy way "My friends Erica and Jared were both summer camp kids, so they got married at a sleep-away camp. They had all the friends stay in cabins for the weekend, and the parents stayed in bed-and-breakfasts in town. The rehearsal dinner was in the boathouse, and they got married at sunset overlooking the lake. Then dancing was in the mess hall. Throughout the weekend, there were campfires, s'mores, impromptu softball games, fireworks, and late-night pizza." Jen Weinberg, West Coast special projects editor It always happens at the end! "The end of the reception is always when the magic happens. I've had midnight tacos in Mexico, impromptu karaoke in Atlanta, and fountain swimming in Ohio. People really feel like they can cut loose at a wedding and that's a beautiful thing!" Megan Gustashaw, online style editor
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More from Glamour 19 Cute Haircuts to Consider 21 Date Night Outfit Ideas The Most Glamorous Celebrities of 2011 10 Beauty Tricks That Make Guys Melt 21 Gorgeous Wedding Dresses (From $100 to $1,000!) Jennifer Hyman and Jennifer Fleiss, cofounders of Rent the Runway (a.k.a. the Netflix of dresses), got the hard-to-impress fashion industry's attention. Now they're giving you career advice! It all started over lunch: Jennifer Hyman, 30, and Jennifer Fleiss, 27, two Harvard Business School buddies, were chatting about ideas for start-ups and thought, What if we loaned out pricey designer dresses for women to wear for special occasions, like weddings, for a tenth of the retail price? They convinced investors to give them $1.75 million to start renttherunway.com, and now, two years later, the site boasts 750,000 members, 120 brands and 45 employees. The two Jens share their tips for pulling off your big idea. No.1 Do Your Research Before launching the site, the duo used their savings to buy 100 dresses and set up a pop-up rental shop in an undergrad dorm. When that was a hit, they held focus groups with more than 1,000 women and asked, how much would you pay to rent high-end fashion? "It's great to have confidence in your idea, but you need to be open to opinions," says Hyman. "If everyone rejects it, you reassess." No.2 Remember: This Is Business Even when Fleiss and Hyman's "team meetings" were just the two of them strategizing in coffee shops between classes, they treated their idea as if it were already a viable business not a hobby. "We hired a lawyer and created a time line," says Fleiss. "We agreed that if this didn't go anywhere in six months, we would look for other jobs. That really motivated us to figure it out!" No.3 Know What You Don't Know "Our backgrounds are in finance and marketing," says Fleiss. "As much as we love clothes, we needed a pro with fashion industry experience." So they hired a buyer. "And we recruited a techie to build our website," she says. "Our company isn't made up of just friends who wear high heels." The lesson: It's better to partner with someone whose skills complement yours than to try to become an expert overnight. No.4 Pursue Work That Fulfills You More important than picturing your dream job is simply figuring out how you want to spend your day. "Ask yourself: What would I enjoy doing? Talking to people? Analyzing problems? Getting results?" says Hyman. "I get the most happiness leading a team, coming up with a strategy and being creative. That's why I know I'd be just as happy being a soccer coach as I am running a fashion company." More from Bing and MSN Lifestyle Site Search: succeed at work , better yourself , how to find your passion
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If you plan on taking the 2015 Mercedes-Benz S65 AMG coupe to the track, then we wish you a lot of luck. That's because unlike the S63 AMG 4Matic coupe, the S65 version won't have the added nanny of 4Matic all-wheel drive. But imagine how beautiful Benz's new coupe will look drifting through those corners. That feat should be easy to do thanks to the beast under the hood. Making 621 hp and 738 lb-ft of torque is a twin-turbo 6.0-liter V-12, hand-built by one talented technician at AMG's headquarters in Affalterbach, Germany. It's mated to a seven-speed auto, and Mercedes estimates the powertrain will launch the coupe to 60 mph in 4 seconds. Interestingly enough, that's one-tenth of a second behind the S63 AMG 4Matic coupe's estimate, which makes sense given its all-wheel-drive grip. The S63 AMG 4Matic coupe, by the way, produces 577 hp and 664 lb-ft from a twin-turbo 5.5-liter V-8. The 2015 S65 AMG coupe will top the two-door's range, which starts with the S550 4Matic coupe at the bottom. The S65 AMG coupe will essentially match the other models in terms of features and tech, though it'll be the first to debut Benz's fancy suspension with the curve-tilting function. This system uses a stereo camera to scan the road ahead to prepare the suspension, which then makes the vehicle lean into the turn while adjusting for speed and curve radius. The system works at speeds from 10 to 111 mph. It's meant to increase driving fun, not to increase cornering speeds. Also part of the coupe's suspension system is Road Surface Scan and Magic Body Control, which scans, preps, and adjusts for road imperfections ahead. Brakes can be upgraded to a lighter ceramic compound system, and Benz touts that the coupe comes standard with a lithium-ion battery. The battery results in a 44-pound weight savings, a relatively small drop in what's expected to be a heavy bucket. We've drooled over the S63 AMG 4Matic coupe's looks, but the S65 AMG is painfully gorgeous. Tasteful chrome accents are used on the body kit, while the front fascia looks even more menacing than the S63's. Also eye-catching are the 20-inch, forged rims with center caps that make them look like center-locking hubs. Inside, the S65 AMG coupe gets the designo touch with seats covered in diamond-pattern Nappa leather. Standard technology includes a head-up display, an advanced adaptive cruise-control system with Steering Assist, a Burmester 3D surround system, and a 360-degree camera that should help drivers prevent curb-rash on the rims. Benz says the coupe will roll into dealerships toward the end of the year. Pricing hasn't been announced, but expect it to cost around $215,500, which is the price of the 2014 CL65 AMG that the 2015 S65 AMG coupe replaces.
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By Bob Vila With the exception of appliances, the pantry may be the most frequently used feature of the kitchen . In many households, it's the go-to place for every meal- and snack-making endeavor. Whether it's an oversized cabinet, a converted armoire or a generously-sized, walk-in closet, the pantry is expected to store as many staples, canned goods, packaged foods, paper products, cleaning solutions, serving pieces and pet supplies as the laws of physics allow. But, irrespective of its size, every pantry holds more and functions better when there is order to the chaos. Here are 5 easy ways to get the most out of your pantry: 1. Maximize your available space Use every square inch of you pantry efficiently, no matter how big or how small. That includes shelves, cabinets and drawers, and even vertical space from the floor to the ceiling. If you have an area where shelves are not feasible, put the wall to good use. Consider installing a pegboard to hang pans and utensils, or attaching a sheet of stainless steel for a magnetized spice rack. Source: Sandra Bird And, don't overlook the benefit of hanging a pocket organizer on the back of your pantry door to store loose items like seasoning and spice packets, or small bags of rice and beans. Source: California Closets 2. Plan for smart storage Whether built-in or freestanding, the storage components that you have in place will impact organization significantly, so plan smart. Since your storage needs may change over time, consider a system that offers some built-in flexibility, like adjustable shelves. Cubby units that can move to where they are most needed are preferable over stationary ones. And don't underestimate the storage capacity of drawers. They are more expensive to purchase up front, but they make storing and accessing everything so easy. Stand-alone metal frame shelving also provides an economical solution for pantry storage, so don't discount its value. 3. Consider using containers It may seem overkill, but storing your dry goods such as flour, sugar, rice, and beans in uniform containers will help keep your pantry organized and neat. Square containers use space more efficiently than round ones. And, units that are stackable will make better use of vertical-shelf storage. At most stores and online retailers, you'll find plenty of containers from inexpensive mason jars to an assortment of colorful plastics to service all of your pantry needs. Baskets and repurposed crates are also great for storing small or miscellaneous items, so see what you might be able to recycle before buying new. Source: Thea Segal 4. Go label crazy Take the time to label everything in your pantry. Doing so will make storing and finding items that much easier, particularly if the pantry is used by all members of the household. Go with traditional, store-bought varieties or get creative with Washi Tape, luggage tags, clothespins or even chalkboard-paint labels. 5. Add some style Source: California Closets Yes, a pantry's main job is functional, but making it look good will make you more eager to keep it tidy and neat. Paint the walls a cheery color, or give them a makeover with some bold wallpaper. If you're buying baskets and bins, find a way to coordinate them with your decor. Hang a funky chandelier to brighten the space. Every time you open the door, it will bring a sense of beauty and fun to your meal-making chores. Related: Spreading Out: 14 Ways to Get More Counter Space Whole-House Storage Solutions: Easy Ideas for Every Room 10 Zero-Dollar Storage Hacks Bob Vila is the home improvement expert widely known as host of TV's This Old House, Bob Vila's Home Again, and Bob Vila. Today, Bob continues his mission to help people upgrade their homes and improve their lives with advice online at BobVila.com . His video-rich site offers a full range of fresh, authoritative content practical tips, inspirational ideas, and more than 1,000 videos from Bob Vila television . Note: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinion or position of Zillow.
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More from Glamour: 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own 25 Celebrity Hairstyles That Will Make You Want Bangs 11 Dating Don'ts You Should Stop Doing Now 10 Most Wearable Spring 2014 Fashion Trends The Best Shoes for Spring 2014 Dating Tips from Taylor Swift Sound familiar? Well, the great irony is that a fear of missing out on something better can make you miss out on all the things you do have going on in your life right now. "The result of FOMO is often not truly being involved in any social relationship or experience because you always have one eye peering elsewhere," Saltz says. Take a quick inventory of your personal behaviors and make sure that FOMO isn't backfiring on you. Here are three areas where FOMO can really hold you back. 1. Your Love Life Always on the lookout for a better guy? "You avoid investing too much or developing deep intimacy and trust with your current partner," Saltz says. As a result, "men on the receiving end of FOMO often feel like second fiddle." Is your guy really falling short of what you want, or does it just seem that way because you're not giving him (and your relationship) due attention? Sure sign of FOMO in your love life: "if you're comparing your guy to every guy in your friends' Facebook posts or Instagrams." 2. Your Friendships "Friendship requires listening, giving, investing, and hanging in there," Saltz says. If you're constantly trying to meet new people instead of investing time and energy into the friends you already have, you might be missing out on a real connection. "Close friendships require some commitment," Saltz says. "FOMO can lead to many acquaintances but no close friends." Sure sign of FOMO in your friendships: "Worrying that there is a better party, cooler person to hang with or more fun group you'd rather join." 3. Your Job We've all had a job we weren't thrilled about once or twice, but if you're always fantasizing about being elsewhere, FOMO could be to blame. "To be successful at work requires effort, dedication, and persistence," says Saltz. Even if you're not currently in your dream role, you can still care enough to put in the effort and use it as a stepping stone to something better in the future. Besides, "colleagues and bosses sense when you are not invested in the team," Saltz points out, so you're only shooting yourself in the foot. Sure sign of FOMO in your career: "Checking career websites incessantly for other jobs, even if you've been at yours only a short time." Your homework: "Take some time to assess if the person, friend, or job in your life is working for you," Saltz suggests. If not, "it's OK if you decide that you need to make a break and find a new one." But if you're going to try to make things work, remember that "this isn't the time to be coveting every other opportunity." Stay focused on the person or task at hand in order to truly connect and see if it's right or wrong for you. And remember: "Often enough, the grass is not greener. More importantly, keeping your feet in too many camps means you're really not in any one camp at all," Saltz says.
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More from Glamour 18 Pretty Celebrity Haircut Ideas to Take to the Salon Fall 2011's Most Wearable Trends 15 Little Signs He Likes You 39 of the Sparkliest Engagement Rings Ever Un-Scary Hair Makeovers to Consider by Lexi Petronis With unemployment rates in the U.S. at about 9 percent, many people with jobs may be taking on extra tasks in their offices and feeling stressed out about staying employed. And many people without jobs are obviously having their own kinds of work-related stress namely looking for employment and worrying about money. But one of the points of National Stress Out Week is to take little steps to relax before your stress becomes a big problem. (Which is good, because sometimes I get stressed out about how I'm not supposed to get stressed out. Seriously!) So if you're at your office desk right now, or taking a pause in your job search and feeling stressed, see what you think about these ultra-quick ways of chilling out: Knock just one thing off your to-do list , like listening to your voicemails (eeks, that's totally me) or returning an email you've been putting off. Drink a cup of orange juice. Or eat some strawberries or sip a glass of grapefruit juice. Researchers say that vitamin C may help lower levels of stress hormones, such as cortisol. Sing a song. Doing this one might depend on how close by your coworkers or housemates are, but studies have shown that singing helps lower stress levels (and improves your breathing and posture). Chew a piece of gum. Chewing gum seems to help relieve stress, and researchers say there's a bonus: it also might make you more alert. Have sex. Well, yeah. Maybe not at work, though.
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More from Glamour: 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own Cringeworthy Fashion DON'Ts 21 Style Don'ts to Live By by Amy Wicks I can't wait for two hours of Leonardo DiCaprio (swoon!) and all those gorgeous costumes designed by Prada . Basically, I consider The Great Gatsby to be part movie, part fashion show. Much has been made of designer Miuccia Prada's work for the film, and most of it is already on display in a new exhibition that opened Wednesday. It coincided with the world premiere of the film in New York City. The exhibition includes dresses, gowns, hats, shoes, and jewelry, in addition to sketches and behind-the-scenes footage of the film. The collection was unveiled last night at a party attended by star Carrie Mulligan and a few other celebs, including Katy Perry . More from Glamour: 8 Easy Ways to Get Glowing Skin More from Glamour: 2013's Most Wearable Fashion Trends This is your chance to get up close to Prada's fashion from the film (so close you can touch it). The exhibition will be on display at Prada's SoHo store until May 12, when it travels to Japan. Are you excited to see the film? Will you try to see this exhibition? Friend us on Facebook , follow us on Twitter and find us on Pinterest .
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Ever wish you could wave a wand and your wedding day would organize itself? Wedding planning doesn't have to rule your life. Check out these wacky confessions and real-life tips from brides who've been there. Get your marriage license "We didn't know we were supposed to get the marriage license! We thought the pastor would bring it. When he said, 'Do you have papers for me to sign?' we looked at each other and said, 'Papers?!' We now have two anniversaries, one the day of the wedding and one the official day of signing. We still laugh about it." Lindsey, 29, Sedro-Wooley, Wash. Print directions from the wedding ceremony to the reception "I was driving to one of our receptions a few days after the wedding, and my fiancé fell asleep. I got lost and tried to make up for lost time but couldn't because there was construction. We were almost an hour late to our own reception. At least one guest had to leave before we got there." Christie, 34, Rexburg, Idaho It's your wedding; voice your opinion when planning "I had nothing to do with planning my own wedding other than showing up once for a dress fitting. I wish I had known that I did want to be part of the planning. The wedding was not at all what my husband and I wanted. We hardly knew anyone who came, and we left 20 minutes into our reception. If I could do it over again, we would have gotten married on a beach somewhere, just the two of us." Kristen, 32, Arlington, Wash. Maintain perspective when wedding planning "It's easy to get caught up in all the little things because you want [your wedding day] to be perfect, but the little things don't matter because you're marrying the person you love. I wish I would've just relaxed!" Jennifer, 29, Plainville, Conn. Unless you want to hear others weigh In, keep most of wedding details a secret "Keep as much info about the wedding to yourself as possible! Everybody is going to have an opinion or idea that they are going to want you to implement into your wedding and will be angry/crushed/humiliated when you decline. When someone asks you about your wedding, just smile and say, 'Oh, I really can't say. It's a surprise!' People will be intrigued. If nosy or overbearing relatives are your concern, hire a wedding planner or ask a strong friend to help and divert all questions to them." Brianna, 33, Anacortes, Wash. Pad your wedding budget "When budgeting [for your wedding], take all your estimates of what you'd think something would normally cost and double it." Jen, 27, Fairfield, Conn. Do your regular morning routine before you put on the wedding dress "Eat and groom before you get into your dress. My bridesmaids had to hold a towel around me while I brushed my teeth!" Mandy, 33, Spokane, Wash. Hire a wedding planner if it's in your budget "If a bride's mother isn't trustworthy on this front, wedding planners usually save you enough money to pay their own fees, and they are a must on the day of!" Rachelle, 32, Littlerock, Calif. Compare wedding vendor prices online "I highly recommend buying things on eBay. I got my guest book, ring pillow, veil, garter and cake-cutting set on eBay for a fraction of what a bridal shop or wedding distributor would charge. I paid $12 for my veil, when bridal shops can charge $120 plus. I also had great success shopping for wedding party gifts on Etsy." Whitney, 29, Seattle Remember that a bigger wedding doesn't necessarily mean a better wedding "Looking back, both of us agree that a smaller number of people at a smaller venue would have been more intimate and appropriate. And because we spent so much money on the reception, we didn't have a ton left for decorations or other things. My advice is to plan an affair that is a size you're both comfortable with." Beth, 28, Vancouver, Wash.
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Organizational expert Julie Morgenstern's top tips for streamlining your routine to give you more "me time" and less stress. Pick out your clothes the night before You would think that choosing your outfit would take the same amount of time in the morning as it does at night. Not so, says Julie Morgenstern, author of When Organizing Isn't Enough: Shed Your Stuff, Change Your Life. "You actually take less time deciding the night before because you're not as stressed. I think when we're stressed, we freeze, we get paralyzed, we can't think, we start making mistakes and keep repeating them." She recommends going as far as hanging the planned outfit down to underwear and jewelry outside your closet. BING: TOP TIME SAVING TIPS Find your go-to outfits You probably have a go-to LBD in your closet that always makes you look and feel fabulous. Morgenstern suggests you find a few more fail-safe fashion choices that work for daytime, too. "Invest a couple of hours one weekend or one evening coming up with four or five standard outfits that you know always work," she says. "You do that for work outfits, and you should do that for going-out outfits as well." Curb your addiction to e-mail One of Morgenstern's mantras: Break the mindless e-mail habit. So basically, stop checking e-mail every 10 seconds! "Every time you're bored, every time you're facing something difficult, you're like 'Let me just check my e-mail first.' You're using e-mail and even the Internet as a kind of procrastination device. If you can eliminate that habit from your day, I guarantee you will regain a minimum of an hour of productivity a day. Minimum." To kick the habit, she suggests setting regular e-mail check times, as well as not checking your e-mail for the first hour you're at work, when possible. Organize your home by the way you think Organizing your mess of a closet can save you at least a half hour per day, but that doesn't mean you have to color-code your clothing like your type-A friend does. "You should organize your clothes in the way you reach for them, the way you think," says Morgenstern. "Not everybody thinks the same way, and I believe the zones of your closet should reflect your unique association. When some people go to get dressed, they think in terms of garments; others think of their clothes more by occasion: work clothes, weekend clothes, dress-up clothes." For more tips on organizing your closet, visit juliemorgenstern.com. Create a last-minute checklist There are few things more satisfying than ticking off items on your to-do list. Get that feeling every time you leave the house by creating a cool-looking checklist to keep right by the door. On it, put all the things you need for the day: wallet, gym clothes, phone charger, iPod, etc. It will save you time trying to remember everything and running back every time you forget something, says Morgenstern. Plus, once you've mentally crossed each thing off, "you'll leave feeling like a million bucks and full of energy." Go to the digital supermarket If you can, order your groceries online so you don't have to go food shopping, says Morgenstern. "It will cut time from your weekly errands and chores, and the program will save your shopping list a big, really helpful time-saver for the household stuff." Make your coffee to go Pay attention, Starbucks addicts. "We waste a lot of time going and getting coffee somewhere," says Morgenstern. "If you invest in a coffeemaker with a timer, you can set it the night before and wake up to the smell of coffee." Stock up on a few cute refillable travel mugs and you'll save time by avoiding that coffee-shop line . Or, if you always forget your mug at the office, consider buying to-go cups and lids to keep at home. Leave work 30 minutes early This tip is going to sound counterintuitive for those of us trying to get more done each day, but Morgenstern swears by it. "Shorten your workday by 30 minutes and you will achieve as much as, if not more than, you currently do." By leaving early, you'll have that feeling of being on a deadline, when you don't have time to spare on perfectionism, procrastination and interruptions. Set aside time for social networking Assign yourself time to check your Facebook, MySpace, Linked In and other social networking sites. They are tremendous procrastination devices, as well as easy entertainment. "But they're like TV," says Morgenstern. "You turn it on and three hours pass, and then you're like 'Where did my day go?'" By carving out set times to spend on them, you'll be more productive when you're focusing on other tasks. {none}
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Planning a big vacation can be hard enough, but add kids to the mix and suddenly there's a whole host of other considerations: What family-friendly activities are available? And will there be enough to do to keep little ones entertained and to keep adults sane? We have our own ideas about foolproof family vacations, and our own Wendy Perrin even came up with a list of her favorite family-friendly resorts. But FamilyFun magazine named its ten best family-friendly destinations in the U.S. and the results were as you'd expect. The No. 1 spot went, unsurprisingly, to Orlando, thanks to its mix of theme parks and other interactive experiences (like the Orlando Science Center). In fact, most of the cities on the list are similarly loaded with kid-happy attractions: San Diego (Sea World, the zoo), Washington, D.C. (the Smithsonian), and New York City (Central Park, Empire State Building) all made the cut. Among the more unexpected entries: Portland, Maine, which was singled out for its maritime history and outdoor activities; and in the no. 2 spot, San Antonio, name-checked for its historic spots (including the Alamo) and the pretty River Walk. Check out the full list below. Do you agree with the rankings, or do you have your own favorite family-friendly locale? 1. Orlando, FL 2. San Antonio, TX 3. San Diego, CA 4. New York, NY 5. Washington, DC 6. Portland, ME 7. Boston, MA 8. Chicago, IL 9. Minneapolis-St. Paul, MN 10. San Francisco, CA
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Here, tips to help you stretch your budget and stress less every day between Black Friday and the day after Christmas Tip 1: Shop for Home Goods on Black Friday Some of the best household products (including big-ticket purchases like dishwashers and HDTVs) get big discounts the day after Thanksgiving. This is the perfect time to replace tattered essentials before the holiday guests arrive. Tip 2: Snag a Cheap Camera on Black Friday Tired of snapping photos on your phone? Black Friday sales offer a great excuse to upgrade to a digital camera. When shopping, don't obsess over megapixel counts; instead, look for a camera with good low-light sensitivity and optical image stabilization. Tip 3: Make a Holiday Budget (and Stick to It) Determine your holiday budget and don't forget to factor in the cost of decorations, travel, party essentials, and, of course, gifts. Make a list of everyone who's getting a present from you this year and assign each person a dollar amount (more for the nice ones and less for the naughty ones). Helpful tip: Use Manilla.com (or one of its highly rated apps) to track holiday spending. Manilla will also remind you when bills are due or when daily deals and travel rewards are about to expire, so not a dollar goes wasted. Tip 4: Support Small Businesses Support independent store owners and hit up local shops in your community. Last year, more than 100 million people visited a small business on the Saturday between Black Friday and Cyber Monday. Tip 5: Get More on Cyber Monday Still looking for a good deal? Check out CyberMonday.com for coupons, free shipping, and free gifts for more than 700 online retailers. Remember to read the return policy before finalizing your purchase. And look for the "https" in your browser -- the "s" means your transaction is secure. Tip 6: Take Advantage of Layaway Plans Layaway is back! Consider this option if you aren't ready to pay in full and don't want to charge your credit card. Here's how it typically works: First, you make a down payment that ranges from 10 to 20 percent of the total cost of the item. You also pay a non-refundable service fee, usually $5. Then you agree to an installment plan and a deadline (30 to 90 days away) by which you'll pay for your gift in full before picking it up. Retailers such as Wal-Mart, Toys "R" Us, and T.J. Maxx offer layaway plans for popular in-store purchases such as toys, electronics, small appliances, and jewelry. Tip 7: Always Pay the Lowest Price You'll never have to wonder if you overpaid with the Amazon Price Check app (available on iOS and Andriod). This free app lets you compare prices among brick and mortar stores as well as online retailers. Just type in the product name, scan the barcode, or snap a photo to start searching. Tip 8: Explore a Holiday Market Sip some hot cider while you meander through the stalls at your local Christmas market. Many cities host makeshift shopping villages where you can search for unique, handmade gifts that support local artisans. Tip 9: Give an Experiential Present Consider treating a friend to an experience the two of you can enjoy together. Sites like Groupon, Living Social, and Google Offers sell gift certificates and activity vouchers, often discounted 50 percent or more, to local venues. Plan a spa day, take a fitness class, try a new restaurant, or see a live performance with a friend. The coupons are typically valid for a few months after the purchase date, so there's no rush to cram another event into a busy holiday schedule. Tip 10: Redeem Credit Card Points If you've racked up your fair share of credit card points, now could be a great time to redeem them. Most rewards programs offer discounted gift cards and merchandise ranging from fashion to food and wine. Chase Freedom, for instance, prices gift cards at 10 to 20 percent off the face value while American Express lists "sale" items such as jewelry and electronics at a 10 percent discount. Tip 11: Search for Free Shipping Love the convenience of online shopping but hate paying for shipping? Log onto freeshipping.org to find coupon codes and sites with waived fees. Some retailers, such as Amazon.com, Macy's, and Apple, mail gift cards for free. Tip 12: Prevent Overspending If you frequently find yourself tempted to overspend during the holidays, choose debit over credit. You may have to sacrifice some benefits like credit building and purchase protection, says personal finance expert, Carmen Wong Ulrich, but for the big spenders, the tradeoff is worth it. Just make sure you don't go into overdraft! Tip 13: Find Local Deals on Your Phone GeoQpons is a robust coupon app (available on iOS, Android, and BlackBerry) that lets you search for discounts on food, products, and services by zip code. The free app also serves up daily deals from sites like Groupon and Living Social. Tip 14: Spoil a Child in Your Life Don't waste money on the latest toy craze. Instead, select one of the 24 picks from the Good Housekeeping's Best Toy Awards. Our panel of experts 140 boys and girls helped choose favorites from 135 contenders, that were also tested for safety and durability. The winners range from an $8 moldable plaything (that transforms from a flamingo into a scorpion into a robot!) to a $71 K'Nex Atomic Coaster. Have a blast with family and save money Shop local deals with Wal-Mart Tip 15: Sell an Unused Gift Card Each year, Americans fail to redeem billions of dollars in gift cards, according to industry estimates. If an unwanted gift card is occupying space in your wallet, trade it in for cash. Sites like plasticjungle.com and giftcardrescue.com will pay up to 92 percent of the face value for unused cards. Tip 16: Stock Up On Stocking Stuffers Grab a few inexpensive presents in case you need something at the last minute, from tea tins to beer cozies. Tip 17: Save Calories and Cash at the Food Court Don't blow your Christmas calories or holiday budget eating at the mall. Look for affordable, healthy options, such as brown rice sushi or a salad with grilled protein like chicken or salmon. "Hold off on the shredded cheese, bacon bits, and creamy dressings," says Christine Gerbstadt, MD, RD, and author of Doctor's Detox Diet. Tip 18: Resist Shopping for a New Dress Save money and skip the new outfit for this year's holiday party. Instead, dig out a little black dress from your closet and glam it up with some glitzy accessories like a beaded clutch or statement jewelry. Tip 19: Pick Up a Hostess Gift Heading to a party? Bring the hostess a set of quirky coasters or a modern terrarium. If neither of those matches her style, browse other great gift ideas for the home. Tip 20: Give Out Your Email Sign up for email newsletters at your favorite stores. Many fashion and home retailers offer a discount on your first purchase and will notify you of sales throughout the month. Tip 21: Adopt a Family Through the Salvation Army, you can provide a family in need with the utilities, food, clothing, and toys on their once-in-a-lifetime wish list. Ask your children if they would be willing to forgo one present in order to give to those who are less fortunate. Or, consider making a donation in the name of friends or relatives instead of buying them a gift. Tip 22: Stay Sane While Parking Don't get flustered if you forget where you left your car. Next time you park in a crowded garage, snap a pic on your phone to remind yourself. And if you hate circling for a vacant spot, consider valet parking. A few dollars might be worth your time and sanity. Tip 23: Save on Shipping Mailing a heavy gift? Get a flat rate box from the USPS or compare postage at shippingsidekick.com. Tip 24: Do You Even Need to Buy a Gift? With so many important people to acknowledge during the holidays, it's hard to know whether to shop for a personal gift or pony up some cash for the individuals who have served you well over the past year. Tip your dog walker one day's pay, says etiquette expert Peggy Post. Give your regular sitter one to two evenings' pay plus a small present from your child. Not sure who should get what? Read our handy guide to holiday tipping. Tip 25: Shop for Power Tools Buy power tools for a special man or handy friend in your life. They tend to go on sale in December. If your favorite fella isn't so into DIY, spend a little now and splurge on a Father's Day gift instead -- grills are marked down in June. Tip 26: Take Advantage of Free Gift Wrap Inquire about complimentary gift wrapping when you're paying at the register. If that's not available, at least ask for a box (and a gift receipt). Some retailers will hand out seasonal boxes with holiday ribbon, which may be a pretty enough that the package won't warrant wrapping paper. Tip 27: Watch for Price Adjustments Take advantage of price adjustments, typically within seven to 10 days of purchase. Many retailers will refund the difference if your item goes on sale. Some retailers like Target and Wal-Mart will match the price listed in a competitor's ad. Tip 28: Map Your Route With Waze, a mobile navigation app that offers real-time traffic updates and turn-by-turn directions, you'll never get caught in holiday traffic again. This free app (available on iOS, Android, and BlackBerry) calls on registered users to report traffic jams and car accidents, to help you find the fastest path. While you're optimizing your route, fill up on cheap gas thanks to GasBuddy, another free app (available on iOS, Android, BlackBerry, and Windows) that compares prices at pumps near you. Tip 29: Make the Most of Christmas Eve If you're going to brave the crowds on Christmas Eve, get an early start. Plan to arrive to the mall when it opens. You may even strike it big at the sale rack, as many stores are trying to unload inventory as the holiday season ends. Tip 30: Prepare for Post-Christmas Sales Take stock of your home and jot down the seasonal items you'll need for next year. Then stick to the list! Snag holiday decorations, Christmas cards, wrapping paper, ornaments, and more at bargain-basement prices (if you can stomach one more day of mall madness).
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There are racks and racks of swimsuits in the stores this summer, but before you try them on, Amy Romanowsky, head of swimwear at J.Crew, offers these useful tips: DON T rush Trying on swimwear is like dating. You might have to sample a lot of different types before you find The One, says Romanowsky. Give yourself plenty of time. DO shop alone Save your friends the agony. It s not the best idea to make swimsuit shopping a bonding experience, Romanowsky warns. Some things are better done by yourself. DON T wear granny underwear OK, says Romanowsky, this might seem obvious, but it s true. You don t want unnecessary bulk or weird lines under your suit. Wear a thong! DON T forget the Bend and Snap Elle Woods signature pickup move in Legally Blonde works here too. Try a standing squat to see if the back gives you a wedgie, check the back to make sure the edges don t creep down, raise your arms to test that the top is secure, and bend over to make sure there s no chest spillage, says Romanowsky. DO check the fabric: Once you ve found your suit, she recommends pulling the fabric to make sure it s got good stretch. Suits made from poor-quality nylon will wear thin quickly, meaning you ll have to repeat this whole bikini-shopping process who wants that? More from Glamour: 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own 50 Swimsuits That Make You Look 10 Pounds Thinner 25 Celebrity Hairstyles That Will Make You Want Bangs 50 Wedding Dresses That Will Make Your Heart Skip a Beat 10 Beauty Tricks That Make Guys Melt 10 Most Wearable Spring 2014 Fashion Trends
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We know it's cold outside and you're dreaming of beaches. Consider this the next best thing: awesome indoor water parks around the world equipped with pools, water slides, swim-up bars, and in some cases, all-year "sunlight." KALAHARI WATERPARK RESORT Ohio, U.S.A. This is the granddaddy of America's waterparks. Covering a massive 173,000 square-feet, Ohio's Kalahari is the largest indoor waterpark in the country, designed with an African motif and a roof system that allows for year-round natural light (spring sunbathing, anyone?). Beyond its vast village of condos and spa, there's a newer 215,000 square-foot convention center. (Because the corporate team that works together, waterslides together.) AVALANCHE BAY Michigan, U.S.A. Located in the shadow of one of the Midwest's most accessible ski destinations, Boyne Mountain is home to Avalanche Bay, Michigan's largest waterpark. Spanning a whopping 88,000 square feet, Avalanche is open year-round, making a trip to its tropical 84-degree indoor wonderland a reality, après ski. HAPPY MAGIC Beijing Officially known as the Beijing Water Cube Water Park, Happy Magic is part of the National Aquatics Center and is now Beijing's most visited tourist spot after the Great Wall. Thanks to a major renovation in 2011, the place looks even more futuristic than on opening day in 2008: think splashy colored tubes, transporting human water rockets through a system of slides twisted this way and that. TROPICAL ISLANDS RESORT Krausnick, Germany We wouldn't think to add a visit to a waterpark onto a trip to Germany, but Tropical Islands Resort an hour south of Berlin looks truly tempting. Housed in a biodome, Europe's largest tropical spa and sauna complex (over 100,000 square-feet) is anchored by real sandy beaches and turquoise wading pools plus an entire wing dedicated to the "art of the sauna." Yes, please. MASSANUTTEN RESORT Virginia, U.S.A. In Virginia's Shenandoah Valley, Massanutten is the catch-all for resort activities ranging from its duo of golf courses to the multi-faceted Massanutten WaterPark. Both indoor and outdoor features are in play at this year-round destination, and it's not all slides and tubes, either: the relaxing Shenandoah Hot Springs is essentially one giant indoor/outdoor hot tub, a hit in inclement weather. GREAT WOLF LODGE Washington, U.S.A. One of a dozen in Great Wolf's roster of lodge-themed water parks (the largest collection in the country), this western Washington park is diversified by jaw-dropping slides and kiddie-pool areas. The Great Wolf collection prides itself on its suites kitschy but comfortable log cabin lookalikes. SAHARA SAM'S New Jersey, U.S.A. An easy half-hour drive from Philadelphia, Sahara Sam's is New Jersey's answer to a water resort catering to all ages. It may not be as large as others in the country, but it offers just enough options for different age groups (a surf simulator for taller kids, a 21+ swim-up bar, easy splash pools for the toddlers) to keep everyone happy. WORLD WATERPARK Alberta, Canada If indoor wave pools are your thing, you'll want to make a trip to World Waterpark, located in the massive entertainment hub that is Alberta's West Edmonton Mall: it's got the largest indoor wave pool in the world. Its beachfront patio space is another reason to visit: private rentals are available to relax between water features, sans crowds.
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Jennette McCurdy and Ariana Grande as Sam and Cat. (Terry Doyle/Nickelodeon) At first, it seemed like a great idea. Take two beloved actresses from two hit Nickelodeon shows; put them together in a spin-off produced by the network's biggest hitmaker; and watch the ratings skyrocket. What could possibly go wrong? As it turned out, many things. What started as an excellent plan in theory took just about a year to fall apart, as Nickelodeon confirmed Sunday that "Sam & Cat" is officially canceled; the episode that aired Saturday night will serve as the series finale. It's an unsurprising but still unusual conclusion to the very strange journey of one of Nickelodeon's most popular shows, which has been plagued with problems since earlier this year. In case tween-focused programming isn't on your radar, the sitcom starred Jennette McCurdy as Sam from "iCarly" and Ariana Grande as Cat from "Victorious" (playing the same characters they did on their respective shows) as unlikely besties who start an after-school babysitting business. Both "iCarly" and "Victorious" were created by Dan Schneider, the brains behind some of the network's biggest hits over two decades, including "All That," "Drake & Josh" and "Zoey 101." With Schneider in charge of "Sam & Cat," it seemed like a no-brainer that this show would take off like his others did; the network ordered 20 episodes to start. Except there were a few things working against everyone. When the show debuted in June 2013, McCurdy was known mostly for her work on "iCarly" and trying (without much success) to launch a country music career. Grande had some small roles before "Victorious" and was starting to make inroads in the pop-music world. Either way, it seemed obvious that both actresses had bigger plans than another kid-friendly sitcom. It didn't help that McCurdy and Grande were also in their early 20s, a little older than usual for Nickelodeon stars. But when about 4.2 million people tuned in for the "Sam & Cat" series premiere the network's best live-action debut in three years executives saw dollar signs. Within a month, Nickelodeon doubled the order to 40 episodes for the first season. That's a massive number of episodes, and Schneider said at the time it felt "daunting." Plus, it left less time for both of his stars to pursue their side projects. Regardless, they charged through; though by this past winter, things started to unravel. McCurdy went on a podcast and joked about her relationship with NBA player Andre Drummond, making fun of his kissing skills. A few days later, racy photos of McCurdy were posted across the Internet. (Drummond denied leaking the pictures.) At the end of March, McCurdy was conspicuously absent from the Nickelodeon Kids' Choice Awards , the network's flagship event. Schneider received the network's first-ever Lifetime Achievement award and was honored on stage by many young stars he had launched to stardom. McCurdy later tweeted that there was a long story behind why she didn't attend. "I was put in an uncomfortable, compromising, unfair situation (many of you have guessed what it is) and I had to look out for me," McCurdy wrote. She clarified that it didn't have anything to do with the risque photos, but instead "has to do with how [N]ickelodeon treated me." Nickelodeon had no comment on the tweets. In early April, word got out that "Sam & Cat" was going on "hiatus" even though there were still several episodes of Season 1 left to film. Rumors flew about a McCurdy-Grande feud and tension on set. TMZ reported that McCurdy was angry that Grande who at this point had released a No. 1 album netted a larger salary. Grande emphatically denied this, while reps for Nickelodeon blamed the break on an "unusually long production cycle" and insisted the show was not canceled. There was also no news about a Season 2 renewal; generally, Schneider's shows are renewed like clockwork. Then, there was simply radio silence about the show, at least. Grande's singing career exploded over the next several months, thanks to her smash single "Problem" (featuring rapper Iggy Azalea), making her more of a household name than ever. Meanwhile, a few more episodes of "Sam & Cat" trickled out over the summer until Nickelodeon finally said this weekend that Saturday's episode (the 35th of the order) would be the last. "Nickelodeon will not be producing more episodes of 'Sam & Cat,'" a network rep told the Hollywood Reporter . "We are very proud of the show and its very talented cast and we wish them all the best." And that's the abrupt end of the saga of "Sam & Cat," which had all the ingredients for another long-running success. Instead, it's a rare miss for Schneider, by far the shortest run for any of his shows over the last 20 years. But he's moved on to the next project, as "Henry Danger" premieres later this month. Grande posted a lengthy goodbye message and tribute to her character, Cat, on Facebook . No word from McCurdy, who has stayed under the radar the past several months. "So the news is out about Sam & Cat. I felt it wasn't my place to make any sort of announcement so I kept quiet until now," Grande wrote in part, noting that the network launched her career. "I want to thank Nickelodeon for making a childhood dream of mine come true, for being a family to me, for being so accommodating and supportive of my multitasking with my music career, and for of course introducing me to many of my fans however many years ago."
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More from Good Housekeeping Ways to Beat the Winter Blahs How Clutter is Preventing Your Happiness Stop Stressing About These 9 Things 7 Ways To Get A Better Night's Sleep Make Any New Year's Resolution Stick Why Stress Can Be Good For You Some people have all the luck -- and it's high time that you became one of them. I'm not talking about windfalls like winning the lottery or discovering a priceless Monet at a garage sale. I'm talking about the kind of luck that can snag you the right job, partner, or apartment -- the kind that makes everyday life happier and helps you thrive. The truth about this kind of luck is…that luck has very little to do with it. What does matter: becoming master of your own fate using these strategies. 1. Forge a new path The more you attend events where you don't know a soul, dare to travel by yourself, or simply talk to a stranger in a coffee line, the luckier you'll be, says Richard Wiseman, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at the University of Hertfordshire who has researched luck for over a decade. Case in point: Public radio reporter Lisa Napoli almost skipped the cocktail party where she met a friend of a friend who later invited her to work at a fledgling radio station in the tiny Asian kingdom of Bhutan. The sabbatical proved to be a life-changing experience. To put yourself in the way of fresh opportunities, think beyond family and friends to farther-flung folks, from casual acquaintances to online connections. And don't overlook what sociologists call "weak ties": the former kindergarten playmate you now follow on Facebook, or the fellow latte lover at a neighborhood café. These people on the periphery of your day-to-day life may hold the most potential to deliver the magic of "I know someone who knows someone," a link that can lead you to something unexpected and wonderful. One way to connect with virtual strangers is to take what I call the Burgundy Challenge: Strike up a conversation with someone wearing burgundy within a 24-hour period. Try taking a new route to work or shopping at a different market while on the hunt for the magenta magnet. Opening yourself up to new experiences like this expands your social network and your chances of getting lucky. 2. Believe you'll succeed Lucky people think of themselves as lucky -- which perpetuates that lucky cycle, helps them shrug off setbacks more easily, and keeps them striving for what they want. A key component of this sunny way of thinking: Don't see every setback as permanent ("This will last forever!"), pervasive ("My whole life is ruined!"), or personal ("Why does this always happen to me ?"), explains Martin Seligman, Ph.D., a positive-psychology expert. Those who feel blessed with good luck subscribe to the three P's differently. They're more likely to see lucky streaks as permanent ("Bet I can keep this going!"), pervasive ("Hey, I won the bid for the apartment; maybe I'll get a callback interview for that job, too!"), and personal ("This feels like my lucky week!"). So if you discover you've sent out a résumé with a glaring typo in it, see it as a temporary, erasable error rather than a permanent Sharpie Mark of Shame. Remind yourself that it's a tiny job-search snafu, not an indictment of your character. Simply correct it (send a cleaned-up version with an e-mail saying, " Read this CV instead, please ") and then refocus on the finish line. RELATED: 12 Ways to Improve Your Life Right Now 3. Try multi- shirking Conventional wisdom holds that the harder you toil, the luckier you'll get. That's true, but only to a point. Surprisingly, you'll catch more breaks if you take more breaks. Research from the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign suggests that when you interrupt long stretches of focused attention with short breaks, your mindset may change so you think about a problem differently. That's why, when I'm stuck and spent, I multi-shirk: I send a "not another adorable kitten video, Mom!" e-mail to my kids, shake it to Katy Perry, and play a silly video game. Ten minutes of happily unknitted brows, and without fail the next great idea materializes. The more enjoyable your breaks, the better -- to help you become clearer on which goals you'll find the most satisfying to achieve. "The more fun you have, the more you get to know yourself and the more clarity you get about what you want in life," says master life coach Susan Hyatt, author of Create Your Own Luck: 7 Steps to Get Your Lucky On! 4. Flip the story Take it from Hamlet: "There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so." Which means that depending on how you view it, a spate of tough luck could turn out to be a lucky break in disguise. Naomi, a woman I worked with, was crushed when her husband asked for a divorce. (Worse, he started dating her close friend!) Aileen's colleague got the promotion Aileen had been counting on. And Kendra couldn't stop beating herself up after she missed a deadline for submitting her art to an important competition. But when I invited each of these women to "flip the story," to look at how their seemingly bad luck might have helped them dodge a bullet or set them up for something even better, Naomi revealed that deep down, she'd known her marriage needed to end -- a year later, she's in a happy new relationship. As for Aileen, "The woman who got that promotion is constantly stressed out," she told me. "The job was the wrong fit for me." And Kendra admitted that her art wasn't quite ready for that contest. Months later, she has a piece she can't wait to submit. Next time you're dwelling on all that's going wrong, ask yourself, How does this setback make me stronger, smarter, or clearer about what I want? Once you do, you'll be on your way to relying on your own resourcefulness to achieve your heart's desires. I'd wish you luck, but you won't need it. Betsy Rapoport is a certified master life coach and the creator of the JoyQuesters program. Visit her at betsyrapoportlifecoaching.com.
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More from Good Housekeeping Save $10,000 in One Year The Best New Makeup Finds – Under $20! 10 Stars Who Look Better With Age 10 Biggest Hair Care Myths Haircuts That Take Off 10 Years The number of adults taking care of aging parents has tripled in the past 15 years, and a recent survey by caring.com shows that 42% of family caregivers say they're spending more than $5,000 a year caring for an aging parent. That's a lot of green. Now, money in itself is a touchy subject for most families; add to that the dramatic role reversal that can occur as our parents need our care, and you've got a very tough topic. Let me make it a bit easier to have the talk and ensure parents' financial health with these three strategies: Mistake: Ignoring your parents' budget If you don't know whether your parents are keeping up with their expenses or what kind of income they are living on — and the size of their nest egg (if they even have one) — then it's time to go on a fact-finding mission so you can help them avoid financial trouble. Move to Make: Do some research about your mother and father's finances First, break the ice by talking about your own budget: "We've had to adapt our budget a bit due to the economy.... How are you doing? Are things the same every month?" This worked swimmingly with my own normally tight-lipped 70-year-old father, who was more than happy to dish. Monthly income is an important starting point. Ask them, "What are your Social Security payments?" for a solid budget baseline. And ask, "Are you drawing the same amount from your retirement savings every month?" Upticks in withdrawal amounts could mean they're falling behind financially. Also ask about any other sources of income, such as a pension or other state or local benefits. At a site of the National Council on Aging, benefitscheck.org, you can find out if your parents would qualify for any assistance they may not have thought of in paying for expenses such as health care, heating and cooling, cell phones, and food. These questions will guide you as to what funds your parents are pulling from every month. Next, run through your parents' bills with them to see if they are in the red every month or if they're breaking even. The script for navigating bills without simply seeming nosy varies. You could offer a helping hand: "Mom, I found a new system I love for organizing my bills -- can I share it with you?" Or, if that might be a minefield, try commiserating: "My phone bill jumped a lot this month — what about yours?" If you find that your mom and dad are losing ground each month, focus on the culprit and create a plan. Is overspending to blame? If so, help them cut back with advice from AARP (go to aarp.org and search for "99 great ways to save"). Is the issue too little savings or a big drop in the value of retirement investments, meaning a lower income? Before you get ready to dole out any cash, ask if your parents work with a financial adviser or planner. If so, ask if you may attend the next meeting. If not, it could be very worthwhile to sit down together with one, even for just one session ($150 and up) in which you could create a focused plan for tweaks to make. To find a certified financial planner (CFP) near you, you can head to the website fpanet.org; visit adviserinfo.sec.gov (the U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission) to check advisers' backgrounds. If credit card debt is an issue, guide your parents to nfcc.org to find a nearby nonprofit credit counselor; join them in a meeting to see what inexpensive options could help pay off their debt. Also offer to call up lenders yourself to get them to lower interest rates and/or consolidate accounts. Yes, this requires time and effort on your part, but becoming your parents' advocate when it comes to debt actually benefits all of you. Mistake: Not knowing just how expensive health care for seniors can be The biggest bill your parents may ever see is the one for their health care. The Employee Benefit Research Institute (EBRI) reports that a couple who are 65 today will spend nearly $300,000 on health-care premiums and out-of-pocket expenses if they live into their late 80s and take a lot of medications. But, you might ask, doesn't Medicare kick in at 65 and cover everything? Nope, it certainly doesn't. EBRI estimates that Medicare covers only 51% of costs; seniors have to come up with the rest from their bank accounts or via their supplemental insurance. Move to Make: Research their health-care resources If your parents are over 65, head to medicare.gov and click on the Medicare Basics tab. This will give you (and your parents) a full overview of what's available to them. In addition, visit mymedicare.gov, an enrollment program that helps recipients track expenses and services. If your parents are under 65 and need insurance coverage but can't afford it on their own, go to medicaid.gov to see what their state offers. As of January 14, 2014, all adults with incomes below $14,484.10 may be eligible for Medicaid. (If your parents don't qualify, they can still get free one-on-one counseling on getting health-care insurance if they go to shiptalk.org.) Also encourage your parents to have regular checkups and preventive tests. This can save them not only money, but time and discomfort as the years go by, through detecting and even staving off debilitating (and expensive) illnesses and complications. Long-term care can include both individual care and rehabilitation expenses (such as nursing home costs) for chronic conditions or illnesses. Our government estimates that almost 70% of people over 65 will require this type of care. For folks over 60, the cost of long-term care coverage can be unaffordable. But if you are looking on your parents' behalf, many states have options called partnerships for long-term care that are a good value. On the Internet, search for "partnership for long-term care" with your state's name to find links to local resources. Also, you can find some low-cost local options for in-home care at eldercare.gov. Mistake: Not being savvy about financial products targeted to seniors Seniors reportedly watch more television than any other age group -- more than 200 hours a month on average! And many of the advertisements they see are for services and products geared toward them, such as reverse mortgages, that may be of questionable value. Move to Make: Protect them from sneaky sales pitches Some TV commercials in heavy rotation tout reverse mortgages to seniors; these mortgages turn home equity into a loan that can be distributed in different ways, such as via a lump sum or monthly payments. Know that just like regular mortgages, these come with fees and other costs, possibly including high commissions. Here's my advice on how to broach the topic: You can casually say to your parents, "Have you seen those reverse-mortgage ads that seem to be running all the time? Please check in with me if you ever consider anything like that. There may be better options for you." Also know that the Federal Housing Administration (FHA) directly offers Home Equity Conversion Mortgages (HECMs), which are low-cost reverse mortgages. For more information, go to hud.gov and type "reverse mortgage" in the Search box. Another option, should your parents need access to more cash and want to leverage their home's value: See if they can refinance their mortgage at a lower rate with a HUD-approved counselor. If they've had a fixed-rate mortgage, they may be able to significantly lower their monthly payments, thereby freeing up more of their funds for other purposes. Bottom line: Fully investigate their options, together. Tip Jar Q: My parents have racked up a considerable amount of debt. I have to wonder: Will I one day inherit their money problems? Carmen says: Let me dispel this myth. You are not liable for debts under your parents' names, whether involving credit cards, mortgages, or collections. As long as no debt was acquired jointly, payments must come out of your parents' estate only, not yours. But follow the advice at left to help get your parents in better shape financially. The truth is, Medicare only covers about 51% of seniors' health-care costs
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More from Good Housekeeping 125 Money-Saving Tips 30 Drugstore Deals 50+ Bedroom Decorating Ideas 25 Ways to Clean Up and Clear Out Clutter 8 Surprising Secrets of Successful Marriages Send your guy and your kids to see the latest blockbuster at the multiplex. Wait another day to return that holiday gift that doesn't fit. You're going to put a couple of hours to good use: It's money-makeover time! Now, this makeover may not sound as exciting as one that involves a spa facial, but it has its own kind of charm: It's profitable. These to-do's can save you more than $30 a month in fees alone, while putting you on track to save much more. 1. Reevaluate your banking 40 minutes; annual savings: up to $400 The bank that wooed you with gift cards, enhanced interest rates, and other perks may not be your best option anymore; in fact, it may be costing you — big-time — to keep your cash there. Find out by reviewing your previous three to six months' worth of bank statements . If you haven't saved them, as I always do (what can I say? I'm a financial columnist), you should be able to find them online. Check how much you have been paying in fees. You may see basic account-maintenance charges (about $10 a month is average) and plenty of other costs. For example, one major national bank charges $12 monthly if your balance is below $1,500 — plus, it bills you $2 for each use of an out-of-network ATM, and that ATM could bill you $3 more. So, if you hit the ATM twice a week, once at a non-network machine, you could be looking at $12 a month in flat fees plus $20 a month for ATMs, for a total of more than $380 per year. A quick peek at bankrate.com (a free site for comparison shopping for banks and loans) shows that for the same services, an online bank typically requires no minimum balance and charges no fees, and you even earn at least 0.2% interest on your checking account. No contest, right? (Here's how Ally Bank, one online bank, operates: You make withdrawals via ATM and deposits either by mail or electronically — if the latter, you scan the check to be deposited and transmit the image to the bank.) 2. Scour your bills for any "gray charges" 20 minutes; annual savings: up to $300 I typically review my credit card statements several times a month. Think about adopting this habit (especially since most credit card companies now give you access to your account online). Here's why: During one recent review, I found a strange charge for $9.98 — I didn't recognize the vendor name, so I dug a little and found that I'd been signed up for a service that says it pays your bills if you're out of work. I say that I "had been signed up" for it because I sure don't remember registering myself! It wasn't fraud per se, but what's called a "gray charge." For instance, you may agree to a free trial of new security software only to notice later that you're being charged for a monthly service you weren't aware of (thank you, superfine print). If you don't catch these fees, they can add up; if you have a $9.98 and a $12.95 monthly charge hiding on statements for a year, you've spent $275.16 — for zip! If you don't have the time to scrutinize your bills, sign up for a free service that monitors your statements for these gray charges, like billguard.com. Research indicates that this kind of service saves subscribers an average of $300 per year in unwanted charges. 3. Assess savings strategies 25 minutes; annual savings: up to $1,000 — or more Throughout the year, you need to set aside money for unexpected expenses (like gifts for the kids' birthday parties) as well as emergency funds and savings for college and retirement. Yet 64% of Americans would not be able to come up with $1,000 cash in an emergency, reports a recent survey by the National Foundation for Credit Counseling. What's more, nearly one-third of workers have less than $1,000 saved for retirement, and 56% have less than $25,000, says the Employee Benefit Research Institute. Don't be a part of those scary statistics. Sign up to put at least $10 to $20 a month into a savings account for expenses that may pop up. Put a note on your calendar to double that amount in six months if you can afford to (saving $42 a month will reap you $500 in a year — enough to smack down expenses like car repairs as soon as they crop up). And how about your emergency savings? With such a wobbly economy, you can really protect your household by putting aside cash for several months' worth of living expenses in case of a layoff or a temporary drop in income. Sign up to automate deposits into your savings account (start with, say, $50 to $100 a month) whenever you get paid. Maintain this account at a bank other than the one you use for your checking account and debit card so it's harder to access the money. Just make sure you won't incur a low-balance fee on your checking account, and keep enough of a cushion to avoid bouncing checks. 4. Retirement-savings review 35 minutes; annual savings: up to $1,000 — or more In January, you should receive statements from your IRAs and 401(k)s that show the past year's activity. See if you're saving enough; try the retirement calculators at sites like kiplinger.com. Your 401(k) or IRA provider may have similar tools, too. If you can, step up retirement savings . Let's say you earn $50,000 a year and are putting a 4% pretax contribution into your 401(k). That's $2,000 a year, and if you're lucky, your company matches this at 75 cents on the dollar, for $1,500. That means you'll sock away an annual total of $3,500. But if you raise your contribution to 7% (hey, it's only $58 more, pretax, from your biweekly paycheck), you'll save $3,500 plus $2,625 from the company, for a total of $6,125. Also, review statements to see if the choices you've made for allocating your money are still smart given the financial roller-coaster ride of recent years. Head to morningstar.com for a free Portfolio X-Ray, a snapshot and risk assessment of where your money is invested. Enter information on where you've put your money (say, 10% in ABCD Growth and Income Fund, etc.), and you'll see easy-to-read charts to help you understand how well your holdings are doing compared to a popular investment approach. Of course, your needs may differ, but this analysis is a useful starting point. Check that clock: Your husband and kids are probably about to return home. But guess what? In 120 minutes, you've taken control of your finances and set your course for savings. Happy New Year indeed! Tip Jar Q: I think the fees on my retirement savings may be way too high. What can I do? CARMEN SAYS: Go to the free site brightscope.com; just register and enter the name of your employer and/or where you've invested. If you feel the charges are too high but you can't change your 401(k) provider, know that you can open another IRA (say, a Roth IRA) with better investment options and lower fees to help balance things out. Want more money tips? Visit goodhousekeeping.com/carmen
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When there's no time to escape to the spa, create your own oasis at home. Here are nine ways to help you decompress in the comfort of your bedroom. Mantra meditation To Western ears, "mantra" is synonymous with "catchphrase" or "mission statement." But mantra is a tool that's been used for thousands of years to help cultivate peace of mind something we could all use a little more of. Choose a word or phrase that is meaningful and melodious such "love," "peace," or "amen" (or whatever resonates with you) and repeat it silently or audibly whenever you need a gentle reminder to savor the moment.More from MSN Living: Not your average ways to relax Comfort yourself Know how a cranky child magically transforms into a little angel after a nap? Treat yourself to five minutes of rest. Gather two firm pillows, then sit with your heels on the floor. Keeping your toes together, open the knees wide and stack the pillows between your knees. Rest your torso on the pillows, head turned to one side. Breathe here, releasing tension with each exhale. After several breaths, turn your head to the other side.Bing: Tips on buying the perfect pillows Take a mental vacation When you need to reduce stress, find a cozy spot in your room and treat yourself to a vacation that's all in your head: Close your eyes and imagine a relaxing place, such as a beach or a mountain view. Visualize the sights and smells. The more vivid a picture you paint in your mind, the more your body will respond to the invitation to relax.Video: 4 tips on easier last-minute getaways Apply a DIY facial mask Build a little relaxation time into your nightly routine with a DIY moisturizing mask. The secret ingredient? Honey. The golden sweet stuff has natural antibiotic properties and leaves skin noticeably softer and moister. Apply about a tablespoon (avoiding the eye area) and rest for 10 minutes as it dries, then rinse with warm water. (Honey can also help blisters heal use it as you would antibiotic ointment.)Bing: Homemade facial mask recipes Relax in a sea salt bath Recover from a long day with an easy detox: Add a cup of sea salt to a warm bath and soak. The salt draws impurities out of the skin. To make it even more rejuvenating, sprinkle a few drops of your favorite essential oil in the water and light some candles. Remember to silence your phone unless you want to be interrupted by incessant ringing.Video: Create the ultimate bubble bath with this easy recipe Change up your nightcap Too much alcohol can disrupt your sleep patterns but tart cherry juice is practically a melatonin cocktail. To score the benefits, drink a mixture of 2 tablespoons of tart cherry juice concentrate and 8 ounces of water twice a day. Make sure it's Montmorency cherry it has six times the melatonin of Balaton tart cherry.Bing: Health benefits of cherries Sprinkle some lavender In numerous experiments, subjects have reported sounder sleep when exposed to the scent. Sprinkle a few drops of essential oil on a cloth and slip under your pillow; use a diffuser; or iron pillowcases with lavender-scented water. Count your blessings In a study conducted by Robert A. Emmons, Ph.D., of the University of California, Davis, people who listed five things they were grateful for each day in a journal fell asleep faster, slept for longer periods of time, and also woke up feeling more refreshed than those who didn't keep a gratitude journal. Breathe deeply Breathe more mindfully. Try taking a full breath now inhale deeply into your belly, then allow every last drop of air to release on the exhale. This simple action blocks the stress response and cues your body to relax, making you less likely to get riled up and more likely to think clearly. Breathe deeply before you respond to anything life throws your way, and notice how doing it changes your reactions.
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Short romantic breaks Like Kim and Kanye, many newlyweds are opting for a quick post-wedding trip rather than a traditional three-week long-haul holiday. If you and your dearly beloved are planning your own romantic escape, why not consider one of the following destinations? Cork, Ireland Kimye headed to Cork, Ireland's largest county, for their mini-moon more specifically the Castlemartyr resort. The area is no stranger to celebrities and their first choice of hotel was apparently Ballinacurra House, in nearby Kinsale, which was a favourite getaway of the late Michael Jackson. Whether they kissed Cork's famous Blarney Stone remains unclear, although it has been reported that they hiked along the breathtaking Ballyhoura Way, explored the area on mountain bikes and downed pints of Guinness at a local pub. Marrakech, Morocco For a trip to Morocco's fourth largest city, we recommend visiting one of the 18th-century riads and enjoying a cocktail as the sun sets, or sweating it out in a traditional hammam. Head to the souks for some retail therapy, and explore the 3,000 winding derbs (alleyways) while dodging the donkey-pulled carts. Finish the day in the Djemaa el-Fna, the main square, where you'll find snake charmers, food stalls and Berber storytellers. When it comes to accommodation, check into the Royal Mansour Marrakech. Sicily, Italy Sicily is the largest island in the Mediterranean sea, and it's packed with Greek temples, Roman theatres, beautiful churches and baroque palazzos. Couples in search of adventure can climb Mount Etna or explore the area on mountain bikes, but the miles of unspoilt coastline are equally tempting Sicily has a much longer summer than most parts of Italy, and the sea remains warm into November. The Belmond Grand Hotel Timeo is without doubt one of Sicily's most spectacular hotels the listed building towers over an ancient Greek theatre. Tenerife, Spain Mini-mooners can enjoy a walk through one of Tenerife's numerous flower-filled parks (Parque García Sanabria in Santa Cruz is one of the most popular) and long hikes up the island's volcanoes. Alternatively, head to one of Tenerife's quieter beaches, such as Las Vistas beach in Los Cristianos. No visit to Tenerife would be complete without a sundowner, and some of the best views can be enjoyed from the Chiringuito beach bar on Playa de las Américas. Crash out at the historic Iberostar Grand Hotel Mencey in Santa Cruz's old town. Sorrento, Italy The Sorrento coastline is one of the most beautiful in the world. Pompeii, Herculaneum and Mount Vesuvius are all within easy reach and Capri, the Punta Campanella Marine Reserve and the Amalfi coast are all just a short boat ride away. Guests at the Grand Hotel Excelsior Vittoria get unbeatable views over the bay of Naples, and the hotel's gardens, which are filled with fragrant orange trees, are perfect for a moonlit stroll. Selfoss, Iceland What's not to love about Iceland? You can whisper sweet nothings to each other beneath the Northern Lights or soothe aching muscles in the Blue Lagoon geothermal spa outside Reykjavík. However, don't just stick to the capital the island of Heimaey is just a 30-minute ferry ride away from the mainland. Take a boat tour around the island, and check out the newly opened Eldheimar museum, which offers a fascinating insight into the eruption of Eldfell volcano, which transformed the island in 1973. Isles of Scilly, UK Located just a few miles off the coast of Cornwall, the Isles of Scilly seem to be from another world. There are five inhabited islands St Mary's, Tresco, St Martin's, Bryher and St Agnes. Tresco is one of the most popular, and has everything from bronze age burial sites and castles, to beautiful beaches and rocky outcrops. We recommend booking one of the Sea Garden Cottages, which offer wonderful views over St Martin s and the Eastern Isles. Samoëns, France If you can't make it to Kimye's Irish castle, a night in an Alpine chalet might just be the next best thing. The chalet in question Rêves de Montagne is located in the French Alps, in the picturesque village of Samoëns. In winter, the area attracts skiers and snowboarders from around the world, but in summer, it's a magnet for hikers and mountain bikers. The bedrooms all have huge picture windows, feather duvets and Egyptian cotton sheets, and there's an enormous hot tub on the balcony. Atlantic Canada Comprising New Brunswick, Novia Scotia, Newfoundland and Labrador, and Prince Edward Island, Atlantic Canada is a place filled with secluded beaches, beautiful lakes and national parks. It's also home to some of the most romantic glamping sites in the world. The two-person Dream Domes at Ridgeback Lodge in New Brunswick are two-person geodesic domes, and come with their own private hot tubs, kitchenettes and barbecue areas. Jordan Planning a wedding can be a stressful affair, and a soak in Jordan's Dead Sea might be just what the doctor ordered. Back on dry land, newlyweds can sign up for balloon trips over the desert (Wadi Rum being one of the most spectacular options), sunset visits to the historical site of Petra and overnight stays at Bedouin desert camps.
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Makeup tip for one-minute eyebrows In our dreams, we leave the house fabulously put-together every day. In reality, we re lucky if we remember to put mascara on both eyes. If you have only a minute for makeup before you run out the door, try one of these quick makeup tips that make a big difference. If you re a person who looks 10 times more polished when your eyebrows are done, make them a priority. But instead of taking the time to fill in both brows in their entirety, simply dot a brow pencil onto those few sparse areas to even things out, then coat them with a tinted brow gel (or clear mascara) for a natural, but still groomed, look on the go.Try: Smashbox Brow Tech To Go, $27, or Lancome Modele Sourcils, $24.50 Makeup tip for a one-minute pop of color Do you have time to apply blush, lipstick, and eyeshadow? Yeah, we don't either. An all over color stick quickly perks up multiple features, though. "For a spot of color that takes no time at all, I love the Multiple from Nars," says Romy Soleimani, beauty director at large for beauty.com. "You can apply this creamy product onto your cheeks, eyelids, and even lips to add a pretty shimmer in just seconds." Makeup tip for one-minute lashes Mascara is one of the most transformative items in any makeup bag, but sometimes you just don't have time to wiggle the wand, de-clump, and wait for it to dry. "To open up your eyes without spending time applying mascara, an eyelash curler is a must," says Soleimani. Curled lashes frame and define eyes and have an effect similar to mascara, but you don't have to worry about smudges when you're in a hurry.Try: Kevyn Aucoin The Eyelash Curler, $21, or Japonesque Go Curl, $12.99 Makeup tip for one-minute eyes "The eyes are a dead giveaway that you didn't have time in the morning or enough sleep," says Jason Hoffman, global director of artistry and education for Cargo Cosmetics. If this sounds like you, focus your time on your eyes to ensure you look awake and rested. "Apply concealer to the eyelids and undereye to conceal redness and dark circles, then set with a touch of translucent powder. Follow with a coat of mascara and you're on your way. Makeup tip for one-minute bronzer When in doubt, use a bronzing powder for a quick, healthy flush. "Bronzer and a fan brush are my staples on the go," says New York City-based makeup artist Kimara Ahnert. "I use my fan brush to contour my cheekbones, hairline, and side of nose, and a sweep over the crease of my eyes for warmth and definition." Makeup tip for a one-minute flawless face A stick concealer can quickly hide what you don't want to see and leave you with a flawless face. "Swipe a concealer on any dark circles or blemishes, red areas (like the outside corners of nostrils), and inner corners of the eyes, then dab with your finger to blend," says Soleimani. "Your face will look flawless in a pinch."Try: By Terry Touch-Expert Advance Multi-Corrective Concealer, $44.50, or Hourglass Hidden Corrective Concealer, $32 Makeup tip for one-minute lips Between lip liner, lip gloss, lipstick, and lip balm, there are about a million options facing you every morning. Pick a product that combines all of the above, like a moisturizing lip-gloss crayon, and you can swipe on some quick color no mirror required.Try: Hourglass Femme Nude Lip Stylo, $30, or Revlon Just Bitten Kissable Lip Balm Stain, $8.99 Makeup tip for a one-minute tan A lot of women feel like they can wear less makeup when they have a tan. Luckily, there are tons of fabulous products that let you swipe one on in seconds. Your best bet is a self-tanning towelette (many have added skin care benefits, like exfoliating glycolic acid) or a tinted facial self-tanner that gradually develops over the course of the day.Try: Dr. Dennis Gross Alpha Beta Glow Pads, $32, or Clinique Self Sun Face Tinted Lotion, $22
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Bring on the sun, sand, and sizzling hot weather: It's swimsuit season! From waist-whittling one-pieces to fringe bikinis that add oomph, we've found 53 incredibly chic bathing suits that will make you look instantly slimmer. It seems the only beach cover-up you'll need this season is sunscreen! Ruched and shirred swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Look for a swimsuit with ruching through the middle to mask a less-than-flat tummy. The extra fabric streamlines your waistline, making it look smaller than ever.Calvin Klein One-Piece Pleated and Ruched Bathing Suit, $108, calvinklein.com Ruched and shirred swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Carmen Marc Valvo Sea Shade Ombre Ruched One-Piece Swimsuit, $139, neimanmarcus.com Ruched and shirred swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Ruched One-Piece, $60, gap.com Ruched and shirred swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Tori Praver Swimwear Eggplant Ruched Marilyn One-Piece Swimsuit, $150, bluefly.com Ruched and shirred swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Seafolly Ruched Tankini Top (DD Cup), $151, neimanmarcus.com Ruched and shirred swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Lenny Neimeyer Ruched Bikini, $120 to $136, anthropologie.com Ruched and shirred swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner O Beach Ruched Halter Bandeau Bikini Top, $21, asos.com Ruffled or fringed swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Maximize a small bust or butt with the help of ruffles and fringe! The girlish detail adds visual oomph.Maaji Spumoni Boutique Ruffle Bikini Top, $67, cusp.com Ruffled or fringed swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Amore & Sorvete Daisy Floral Suit, $226, asos.com Ruffled or fringed swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Vix Swimwear Turquoise Ruffle-Trimmed String Monokini One-Piece, $64, bluefly.com Ruffled or fringed swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Prima Donna Ruffle Bottom in Light South Pacific, $72, juicycouture.com Ruffled or fringed swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner H&M for Water Fringe Swim Top, $5, hm.com; H&M for Water Swim Bottom, $5 hm.com Ruffled or fringed swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Radiate Love Tie Tank Bikini Top, $50, roxy.com; Radiate Love Scooter Bikini Bottom, $44, roxy.com Shapewear as swimwear that'll make you look 10 Pounds Thinner Consider it a gift from the bathing-suit gods. Swimsuits with tummy-control panels help banish belly bulge with little to no effort on your part.Spanx Swimwear Piping Hot One-Piece, $198, zappos.com Shapewear as swimwear that'll make you look 10 Pounds Thinner Miraclesuit Jena One-Shoulder Swimsuit, $150, bloomingdales.com Shapewear as swimwear that'll make you look 10 Pounds Thinner Sultry Sweetheart Bandeau One-Piece, Passion Fruit, $198, neimanmarcus.com Shapewear as swimwear that'll make you look 10 Pounds Thinner Miraclesuit Oceanus Multi-Print Draped Swimsuit, $146, hsn.com Shapewear as swimwear that'll make you look 10 Pounds Thinner Twisted-Bandeau Control Max Swimsuit, $40, oldnavy.com High-waist swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Not only are retro-inspired bathing-suit bottoms adorable, they also pull in your stomach and mask a muffin-top.Nelly Floral Bikini, $50, whitesandaustralia.com High-waist swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Cosmic Dancer Suit in Ice Cream, $185, shop.labellerebelle.us High-waist swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Esther Williams Bathing Beauty Two-Piece in Rosebud, $90, modcloth.com High-waist swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Gossard Floral Egoboost Plunge Bikini Top, $65, asos.com; Gossard Floral Retro High-Waist Short, $33, asos.com High-waist swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Minoan Halter Top, $89, aquarellaswimwear.com; Minoan High-Rise Bottom, $69, aquarellaswimwear.com High-waist swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Hot Pink Longline Bikini Top, $30, topshop.com; Hot Pink Longline Bikini Bottom, $20, topshop.com High-waist swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Mix-and-Match High-Waist Bikini Pant, $27.15, asos.com Optical illusion swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Stripes and zigzags draw the eye to the narrowest part of your body, creating the illusion of a super-small middle. And the classic print will see you through many seasons to come.Milly Digital Zigzag Santorini Bikini Top, $57, revolveclothing.com; Milly Digital Zigzag Barbados Bikini Bottom, $57, revolveclothing.com Optical illusion swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Ella Moss Mazzy Molded-Underwire Bra Top, $63, piperlime.com; Ella Moss Mazzy Tab Side Pant, $49, piperlime.com Optical illusion swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Lauren Moffatt Ace Maillot, $210, at Willow Chic Boutique Optical illusion swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Women's Halter Swimsuit in Navy-and-Green Stripe, $15, oldnavy.com Optical illusion swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Striped Swim Top $58, armaniexchange.com; Striped Swim Bottom $58, armaniexchange.com Optical illusion swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner DKNY Chic Stripes Spliced One-Shoulder Maillot With Removable Soft Cups, $112, zappos.com Optical illusion swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Java Top and Bottom, $172, ondademar.com Swimsuits with tiny prints that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Pilar Maillot in Fatal Charm, $116, acheswimwear.com Swimsuits with tiny prints that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Obey Batik Floral One-Piece, $56, zappos.com Swimsuits with tiny prints that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Geometric Giraffe Print One-Piece Swimsuit, $80, loft.com Swimsuits with tiny prints that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Keyhole Tanksuit in Flora, $110, madewell.com Swimsuits with tiny prints that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Abstract-Print Bandeau Bikini Top, $11, forever21.com; Abstract-Print Bandeau Bikini Bottom, $10, forever21.com Swimsuits with tiny prints that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Shoshanna Scattered Hearts Beaded Triangle Top, $51, shopbop.com; Shoshanna Scattered Hearts Beaded-Trim String Bottom, $62, shopbop.com Swimsuits with tiny print that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Miraclesuit Rialto Pinpoint One-Piece, $160, coldwatercreek.com Bustier swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Give your girls the support they need with a bustier or bralike bikini top. Underwires and boning also help hold your chest in place.Stussy Floral Bikini Top, $55, urbanoutfitters.com Bustier swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Women's Balconette Bikini Top in Persian Melon, $23, oldnavy.com Bustier swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Maaji Blueberry Reversible Bustier Bikini, $69, neimanmarcus.com Bustier swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Zinke Starboard One-Piece Swimsuit With Removable Peplum, $136, bloomingdales.com Bustier swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Phoebe Bandeau, $69, aquarellaswimwear.com; Phoebe High-Rise Bottom, $84, aquarellaswimwear.com Bustier swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Baku Color-Block Balconette Bikini Top, $119, asos.com Bustier swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Itsy-Bitsy Polka-Dot Underwire Bra Top, $94, juicycouture.com Belted swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Show off a sexy hourglass shape in these options. Choose one with a lower- or higher-rise belt, depending on where you want things cinched.Norma Kamali Kamali Kulture One-Shoulder Belted Mio One-Piece, $74, shoplesnouvelles.com Belted swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Nanette Lepore Waikiki Belted One-Piece, $164, bergdorfgoodman.com Belted swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Trina Turk Racquet Club Belted Swim Bottom, $76, neimanmarcus.com Belted swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Tommy Bahama Tortola Leaf High-Waist With Belted Pant, $63, zappos.com Belted swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Penelope Floral Belted Bandeau Swimsuit, $51, asos.com Belted swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Nanette Lepore Water Dragon Tease Bandeau, $50, 6pm.com; Water Dragon Dreamer Bikini Bottom, $48, 6pm.com Belted swimsuits that'll make you look 10 pounds thinner Michael Michael Kors Belted Strapless Swimsuit, $140, nordstrom.com
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If packing for a trip is your worst nightmare, never fear. We've tapped 14 of the most trustworthy fashion jet-setters to give us their tips and tricks for traveling in style. Grab your cute carry-on, put on a cashmere scarf, and get ready to take off! Jamie Beck, photographer and founder of From Me to You Jamie's packing tip "Ballet flats are my lifesaver for overseas flights. I wear a pair that are slightly loose think half a size bigger so going through security is a breeze and when your feet swell on the plane because let's be honest, they do you can still walk off comfortable and chic." Jamie's packing tip "I never pack for rain because hotels usually have umbrellas they will loan to guests or you can purchase one on site." Paige Adams-Geller, designer of Paige denim Paige's packing tip "Be sure to pack shoes and accessories that can be worn with multiple outfits. I always travel with these Saint Laurent T-strap metallic leather sandals because I can wear them with my gold or silver jewelry! They also look great with my favorite Paige Skyline ankle-peg jeans in Beachwood." Paige's packing tip "When traveling to any sunny destination, my go-to skin care product is Dr. Ava Shamban sunscreen. It is an absolute necessity." Hayley Bloomingdale, associate editor and social-media manager for Moda Operandi Hayley's packing tip "Regardless of the destination, any given suitcase of mine will be packed with at least a few pairs of J. Brand jeans, several Equipment tops, and striped essentials from Minnie Mortimer. These are the best combinations for any city comfortable, easy to pack, and always chic." Hayley's packing tip "I have travel sizes of almost all my favorite beauty products, including Frédéric Fekkai shampoo and conditioner, La Mer face cream, and Laura Mercier tinted lotion." Erin's packing tip "The perfect little white dress is a must-have for any tropical destination. A textured fabric like this lace is a great option because it doesn't wrinkle as easily as cotton or silk." Erin's packing tip "No matter the trip, my iPad, stocked with books and Scrabble, is the first thing I pack to keep me entertained." Lauren Moffatt, designer of Lauren Moffatt Lauren's packing tip "The second I get to my seat, I get comfortable. For me, this means changing into my Hansel from Basel Mushu boot socks." Chiara Ferragni, founder of The Blonde Salad Chiara's packing tip "Take an iPhone photo of each item you're bringing to make sure you have all the right stuff. This will also help you avoid overpacking." Chiara's packing tip "Always wear multiple layers while traveling. Sometimes it can be really hot or sometimes very cold. You need to be prepared for everything." Annie's packing tip "Pack bold accessories like statement necklaces or scarves to update your look." Annie's packing tip "Stick to a dark color scheme for your outfits. Black, gray, and navy are versatile and don't show wear and tear. These colors also mix and match easily." Cynthia Rowley, designer of Cynthia Rowley Cynthia's packing tip "Create your own travel necessities checklist that you can reference each time you travel. Mine includes my passport, phone charger, iPad, sketchbook, sneakers, swimsuit, high heels, party pants or skirt, sunglasses, and workout gear." Cynthia's packing tip "Always pack a cotton or cashmere scarf. On the plane, I use mine as a sleep mask or blanket for my children. It can even be used as a sarong in warm-weather destinations." Reece Solomon, designer of Reece Hudson handbags Reece's packing tip "One of the most important travel beauty products I bring everywhere is Klorane Dry Shampoo. It's a good time-saver and helps quickly freshen your hair." Reece's packing tip "High-waist jeans work anywhere. The Acne Needle is my go-to because they can be dressed up or down and work well with both boots and heels." Rachel Roy, designer of Rachel Roy Rachel's packing tip "Toner saves my skin on long flights. I use Bobbi Brown face tonic to keep my face hydrated. It contains cucumber, vitamin B5, and lavender that softens and conditions skin." Rachel's packing tip "I always roll my clothes instead of folding them because it decreases the amount of possible wrinkles as well as saves space in my suitcase." Elisa Dahan, co-designer of Mackage Elisa's packing tip "To avoid seeing a giant mess upon opening your suitcase, always pack your toiletries in plastic ziplock bags." Elisa's packing tip "My go-to vacation shoe is a Louboutin wedge. They are the perfect fit for day excursions or nights on the town." Alisa Gould-Simon, co-founder of Pose Alisa's packing tip "Pack a portable steamer that you can use to get wrinkles out of your clothes. You can get great ones for under $30 on Amazon.com." Alisa's packing tip "Take versatile flats. I love my Loeffler Randall studded flats and my Zara buckle booties. I can dress them up or down, plus my feet don't get tired after running around in them all day." Brit and Kara Smith, co-designers of Elkin Brit and Kara's packing tip "Always fly with a good-luck charm. We're pretty superstitious ladies and never fly without our dear friend Jennifer Meyer's good-luck charm necklace. It makes us feel chic and safe." Brit and Kara's packing tip "We always bring our custom Elkin candles on trips so that our hotel room smells good and reminds us of home." Brit and Kara's packing tip "It's always important to feel and smell fresh after a long flight. Lucky for us, our favorite fragrances from Le Labo come in travel tubes."
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Hyundai won't debut a redesigned version of the Hyundai Sonata Hybrid until next year, as the outgoing Sonata Hybrid body style will be sold alongside the redesigned 2015 Sonata sedan for the next year. The new Sonata Hybrid will arrive sometime next year as a 2016 model. The current Hyundai Sonata Hybrid is powered by a 2.4-liter Atkinson-cycle four-cylinder engine that pairs with a 35-kilowatt electric motor for a combined output of 199 hp. It uses a lithium-polymer battery pack and gets EPA fuel economy ratings of 36 mpg city, 40 mpg highway, 38 combined for the standard car, and a slightly decreased combined rating of 37 mpg for the Hybrid Limited version. Since the redesigned version of the 2015 Hyundai Sonata boasts higher fuel economy ratings compared with its predecessor, we can assume that the next Sonata hybrid will improve on the current car's numbers as well. The new Hyundai Sonata Hybrid will arrive sometime next year, going on sale as a 2016 model, so the current Sonata Hybrid will live on and be sold in dealers for the next year or so as a 2015 model. Hyundai has not officially announced pricing, but don't expect much of a change from the 2014 Hyundai Sonata Hybrid's base price of $26,810 with destination. The redesigned 2015 Hyundai Sonata sedan recently went on sale with three powertrains: a 2.4-liter four-cylinder, a 2.0-liter turbocharged four-cylinder, and a 1.6-liter turbocharged four-cylinder for the new Eco version. Stay tuned for more news about the 2016 Hyundai Sonata Hybrid, and look for some likely discounts on the outgoing Sonata Hybrid as production ramps down and dealers continue to sell off inventory of the 2014 and 2015 Sonata Hybrid models.
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More from Good Housekeeping Meet Three Families Dealing with Layoffs Find 40 Ways to Save Money and Survive a Recession Recession-Proof Your Soul Spend Less on Groceries Keep Your Marriage Recession-Proof Judy Lederman knew that sales were slow — very slow — at the department-store chain where she worked as a public relations manager. But that didn't make it any less of a shock when she was summoned to corporate headquarters in New York City one day last spring and told her position was being eliminated. Lederman, a 49-year-old single mother from Scarsdale, NY, had always been the employee who got superlative reviews, so she believed she would be safe if any cuts were made. She remembers her supervisor tearfully apologizing after delivering the news. "I didn't know how to respond," says Lederman. "Should I have tried to make her feel better? Should I have said, 'Oh, don't worry about me. My daughter and I may be homeless, but it'll be OK'?" she recalls with gallows humor. As she left the building, Lederman tried to focus on everything she had to do: Consult a lawyer. Update her work portfolio. Schedule doctors' appointments for herself and her 16-year-old while they still had health insurance. "My mind was spinning like a disc in a broken CD drive," she says. Out of habit, she began dialing her work voice mail and then realized, "Wait, I've been fired. Why check voice mail?" Returning to one of her former employer's stores to clean out her desk, Lederman felt the sense of betrayal wash over her. She no longer belonged; she was no longer part of the team. Suddenly, the thought of all the money she had spent at the store — both to support it and to take advantage of her employee discount — popped into her head. "All I could think was, 'I could really use that money now,'" she says. "Had I known I was going to be laid off, I sure wouldn't have bought all those cute shoes and purses," Lederman admits. "I was mad — at the store, at myself." But the hardest part lay ahead: "When I came home and told my daughter, she started to cry — which broke my heart," says Lederman. "We'd been through so much together already with the divorce, and she looked at me and said, 'Why do we always have to be the strong ones? Why can't we just once not have things like this happen in our lives?'" As Lederman tried to comfort her daughter, she felt another emotion crowd in with the hurt, anger, and panic: guilt. Lederman is far from alone. With more than 4.4 million American jobs lost since the recession began in December 2007, and the unemployment rate at its highest level in 26 years, chances are you or someone you know has faced a job loss. And even if you are still employed, you've probably wondered, at least in passing, "Am I next?" Although layoffs may now be common, they haven't become any easier to deal with. "Losing your job is like identity theft: Your sense of who you are can vanish," says Debbie Mandel, author of Addicted to Stress: A Woman's 7-Step Program to Reclaim Joy and Spontaneity in Life. And your feelings in response to that loss, whether it's yours or that of someone you care about, can be surprising and tumultuous — and can hit you deeper than you ever anticipated. Here, experts and women who have been there share how you can get through this tough, uncertain time. When you're the one laid off In the weeks after losing her job, Judy Lederman fought to stay productive and positive. She updated her résumé, filled out her final expense report, and made appointments with potential PR clients. "I thought, 'Look how qualified I am. I'll find something soon,'" Lederman says. "'And I've got unemployment and severance. I'll make it.'" But as the months passed and her savings dwindled with no full-time job prospects in sight, Lederman struggled to find a glimmer of optimism. "It's a constant battle not to slide into that 'Why me?' victim mentality and all the self-pity that goes with it," she says. She's stopped listening to the radio, because she can't bear to hear the latest news about the jobless rate going up or the stock market going down — that will only compound her feelings of hopelessness. Next: Coping strategies Lederman has also been rocked by the blow to her sense of self. "When I go to a social gathering, I try to remind myself of all my accomplishments — I've published books and run my own PR firm — but I can't help but feel like a second-class citizen much of the time," she says. "I see other people and think, 'Look, they're working and I'm not,' and it's hard not to take that personally. And I'm embarrassed to admit, when I heard that another wave of layoffs hit my former employer, part of me went, ' Yessss! Now I don't feel so singled out.'" While time plays a key role in healing the pain of a job loss, there are steps you can take to help the process move along more swiftly: Don't go into overdrive. Tempting as it may be to launch yourself into a flurry of activity — calling everyone you know, e-mail-blasting your résumé to your entire address book — take a few days to just process what's happened to you, says life coach Jo Anne White, Ph.D., a coauthor of Emotional Wellness for Women Volume II and Volume III. Also, cut yourself major slack. If you need to spend an afternoon crying, or indulging complex revenge fantasies, or just sleeping, that's OK. Another tip: Surround yourself with people you can count on to be positive. In fact, you might want to share the news with just a few close friends at first, says Nancy Collamer, founder of layoffsurvivalguide.com. That way, you won't be overwhelmed by having to share your story again and again. Don't overshare with the kids. Stick to the basics: You lost your job, the family may need to spend less right now, but you'll all work together to get through it. Don't promise anything you can't guarantee, like "I'll get a new job soon," says Chad Dion Lassiter, a social worker and adjunct lecturer at the University of Pennsylvania's School of Social Policy & Practice: "Instead, say something like, 'I'm going to do my best to do what's right for this family.'" Be straight with your spouse. If your husband goes into fix-it mode — or dismisses your worries about the future with "Oh, it'll be fine" — you may need to directly ask for the kind of support you need, says White. "Say, 'I really need you to listen and not try to come up with a quick solution or ignore my concerns. You may not be able to fix it, but that's OK. I just need you to hear me.'" Protect yourself from gloom-and-doomers. While you might be able to shake off a thoughtless remark from a casual acquaintance, it's harder to ignore negativity from people close to you. In some cases — your brother who keeps asking you in hushed tones, "Gosh, how are you going to pay the mortgage?" or your friend who urges you not to endure "the shame" of collecting unemployment — you'll need to take a firm stand. "Your priority is to take care of yourself and your family," says White. "If people are being belittling or negative, say, 'If you're not going to support me or be positive — which is what I need right now — then I need to get off the phone.'" Lederman has found solace in those friends who keep her spirits up. "I try to talk to people who won't drag me down," she says. "You just can't weather this alone." Daily prayer has also become an important part of her life. "God keeps gravity working and the earth moving. Surely he'll keep me upright," she says. When a family member is the one to lose a job When Melissa Brewer's* husband lost his computer-programming job last April, it wasn't much of a surprise. "We had been anticipating it for a while, staying up at night talking about what we'd do if it happened," says Brewer, 33, a marketing professional and mother of two in San Jose, CA. "We'd even made an emergency budget, so we knew what we would have to cut." In her eagerness to be supportive, Brewer tried to be as positive as she possibly could be. "I found myself bending over backward to be loving in all areas of our life," Brewer explains. "That meant not turning down sex, not turning down things like 'Hey, can you get me a cup of coffee?,' not being rejecting in any way." But as months went by and her husband was unable to find work, the strain of maintaining her upbeat facade — not to mention the enormous pressure of being the family's sole breadwinner — started to wear on her. "I was swallowing a lot of my own pain about the situation because I didn't want to contribute to his negative feelings," she says. "But at times, I even wondered, 'Did I choose the right person to marry? Did I make a terrible decision?'" *Name has been changed Next: Be a support system Brewer's true feelings finally surfaced six months after her husband's layoff, when his unemployment benefits ran out. "The day we got the last check, we went to a party with a lot of people who didn't know our situation," she remembers. "We kept having to tell them what had happened, and they were all saying things like, 'Six months? That's a long time,' or 'Wow, that's really tough.'" Overwhelmed by the tsunami of concerned comments, Brewer realized, "Hey, this is really hard!" and broke down sobbing in the middle of the dinner party. "My husband and I huddled in a back room while everyone else was at the table," she remembers. "I was crying hysterically and said things like, 'You may never find a job again!'" She told him the truth: that she was tired of always being positive. Her husband confessed that he was afraid too — afraid that he'd never find another job, afraid that the 10 years he'd spent in his industry were all a waste and he'd have to start over somewhere new. "He said he was glad I had told him how I really felt," Brewer says. "And it gave him a chance to comfort me, which I think was empowering for him." Brewer's instinct to avoid burdening her husband was admirable, even if she carried it a little too far, says Mandel. "Think of yourselves as a team," she says. "Sometimes you're the one who carries the ball; sometimes it's your spouse's turn. You want to lighten his load so he can heal." Specific strategies: Open your ears. Your very first priority when your spouse has been laid off is simply to listen, without judgment or blame. "Give him a few days where you're not offering suggestions like 'Why don't you apply for that job?'" says communications expert Laurie Puhn, a family lawyer, mediator, and author of Instant Persuasion. "He needs space to think through this situation. Just ask open-ended questions like 'How are you feeling?' And show your support by saying things like 'This is hard, but I know we'll get through it together.'" Watch how he grieves. If your husband doesn't open up right away, it's important not to push him to do so, says White. "Men and women grieve very differently," she says. "Sometimes being supportive means just being quiet." But if you see signs of depression, such as insomnia (or sleeping too much), drinking too much, eating too much or not enough, or not getting dressed, suggest he talk to his doctor or a counselor, says White: "Say something like, 'You may not want to talk about this, but you've been sleeping nonstop for a few days now, and I'm getting worried. I can only imagine how hard this is for you, but maybe we need to do something more to help you pull out of it.'" Don't make it about you. "You have a right to be upset about the situation, but saying things like you're disappointed you had to cancel a family vacation is just going to make your husband feel worse," says Collamer. But do find an outlet for your feelings somewhere. Talk to a friend; write in a journal; give yourself permission to leave early some mornings so you can sit in a café and clear your head for a half hour. Let him steer his job search. When your husband is ready, offer specific help (combing job listings online, for example, or networking with a coworker on his behalf), but do not — repeat, do not — jump in without asking first, says Puhn: "If he wants to do it on his own, you have to let him." If he seems to have lost motivation to look for a job, it may be because the kind of position he really wants seems too hard or time-consuming to get. "Tactfully suggest that he come up with shorter-term goals, as in, What can he do now to make money?" says Puhn. "Let him know you'll be proud of him for making the tough choice to take a job that isn't exactly what he wants." Don't huddle at home. The change in job status may make you less inclined to socialize, but in stressful times, it's important to reach out to people besides your spouse, says Mandel. See other couples; encourage your husband to hang out with his guy friends without you. "You need to have that village," says Mandel. "Don't keep him with you and cocoon him." As for Melissa Brewer, her husband hasn't found a job yet, but she has found comfort in realizing that they are rich in family, friends, and love. "I now know that our marriage is never going to go away," says When you have a friend in need Last September, Molly Atkinson's close friend from high school was suddenly let go from her job at a pharmaceutical company. The layoff was doubly upsetting because her bosses had reassured her just weeks earlier that her job was safe, which added feelings of betrayal to the mix. "She was devastated," says Atkinson, 32. "She loved her job, and besides that, she and her husband have a really big mortgage that they're worried about." Next: A friend in crisis Atkinson comforted her friend and, over the next few months, gave her pointers on her résumé and cover letters, acted as a constant cheerleader, and shared money-saving tips and hard-won wisdom from when she herself was jobless several years earlier. But she never expected that her own good fortune might make her friend's problems harder to bear. In December, Atkinson lost her job at a nonprofit in Sacramento, CA — but found a new job very quickly. "I didn't want to call and share my good news, since my friend had been trying so hard for months," says Atkinson. "When I did talk to her, I pretended my new job was a step down because I felt so bad about the situation. All she said was, 'Wow, you're so lucky.'" For Christmas, Atkinson splurged and bought her friend a Coach passport cover. "When she opened it, there was a moment of silence, and then she just said how nice it was and thanked me," says Atkinson. Then Atkinson opened her gift: a homemade picture frame with a photo of the two friends. "That was when the amount of time that she'd been without a job or paycheck hit me," says Atkinson. Though she made a fuss over how beautiful and special her friend's handmade gift was, she left feeling like a "big jerk," Atkinson says. And she continues to feel guilty as her friend's unemployment benefits run out. "I didn't expect my friend to be so happy for all my blessings. She should be resentful, but she's not," explains Atkinson. "And that makes it harder to handle: Why are these bad things happening to such a wonderful person?" As Atkinson learned, financial crises can challenge a friendship in unexpected ways. Here's what you can do to handle the situation: Connect. Don't feel awkward about making the first move. Call or e-mail, acknowledge what happened, and invite your friend out for coffee or a meal. Keep it simple. Say, "I'm so sorry about your work situation. Is there anything I can do to help?" Then follow her cues: If she changes the subject, let it go, but if she does want to talk, listen. If she doesn't respond when you reach out, don't barrage her with calls and e-mails, which might add to her stress, says White. Instead, try a single message, something like, "I want you to know I'm here for you. Is it OK for me to keep calling, or do you need me to leave you alone for a while?" Drop the Pollyanna routine. Steer clear of platitudes like "Everything will be OK" and "There's bound to be an even better job just around the corner." And don't be ridiculously upbeat, says Puhn. "It's easy for you to say, 'Oh, it's for the best. You hated your boss and now you're free.' But the reality is that you still get to go to your job and get paid. It's a lot different for someone who truly may not be able to handle the bills that arrive next month." Think one step ahead. When your friend is ready to accept some support, offer specific ways you can help. Don't wait to be asked. Brainstorm what might make her life easier. It could be anything from introducing her to a professional connection to watching her children while she goes on an interview. Check in again. Keep checking in to see how your friend is doing, asking about the job hunt every few weeks or so. "Say, 'How are you doing? Is there anything promising?'" suggests Puhn. "You might be afraid to bring it up in case your friend hasn't found a job, but meanwhile she's thinking that you don't even care enough to ask what's going on." Remember, she may have lost a big part of her social network along with her job, so do invite her out for low- or no-cost activities, such as dinner at your house or a weekly morning walk. The most important thing, though, is to simply let her know she's not forgotten, says White. "Think about how you'd feel. You'd need to know that your friends value you and want to stay in touch. And what better way to let someone know they're important to you than to reach out?" Job-Hunting Tips for the Laid-Off Do wait a few days or weeks to send out your résumé. "You won't be thinking totally clearly those first couple of days, so it's not a good time to make judgments about your résumé and what kind of job you want," says Nancy Collamer, founder of layoffsurvivalguide.com. Don't worry about sharing your news; there's no shame in being laid off. "When you're ready, tell people you're on the market!" says Lisa Mininni, author of Me, Myself, and Why? The Secrets to Navigating Change. Do use the right words when talking with potential employers. "Say, 'Unfortunately, due to the current economy, my company had layoffs and I was one of the people who lost my job,'" says Collamer. Warning: Don't use the word "fired," which implies that you were at fault. Don't stay angry at your past employer. That resentment can wind up working against you, so dig deep and let it go. "You'll need a reference from your old job someday," says Laurie Puhn, a family lawyer and author of Instant Persuasion. "So ask yourself: Would you rather hate them or have a new job?" Do maintain a schedule. "A regular routine provides needed structure to get you up and moving through your day," says Collamer. Don't spend hours on job Websites. Yes, they can be helpful, but they can also vacuum up all your free time. Remember, says Collamer, "most people still find jobs through their own networking."
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About a quarter of Americans volunteer, and of those, a third volunteer for more than a hundred hours each year (which, if you think about it, is just two hours each week). When I was growing up, I saw both my parents volunteer countless hours to various causes over the years. Although it might seem like a wise practice to talk to children about the importance of volunteering, in my case my parents sent a very clear message by not talking about it. It went without saying: Of course a person would spend time and energy on important causes. No discussion necessary. Volunteering our time, energy, and money is the right thing to do — we all know that. Furthermore, studies show that this habit boosts happiness; those who work to further the causes they value tend to be happier and healthier, experience fewer aches and pains, and even live longer. They show fewer signs of physical and mental aging. And it's not just that helpful people also tend to be healthier and happier; studies show that helping others in itself causes happiness. "Be selfless, if only for selfish reasons" is one of my favorite happiness paradoxes. Giving back may seem like a stretch time-wise, but it enables us to grow in unexpected ways. We're happier when we're learning something new, teaching someone else, making something better, or fixing something. As William Butler Yeats observed, "Happiness is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing nor that but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing." Volunteering can be a terrific way to foster an atmosphere of growth. You can organize meetings to support your neighborhood school. You can help out in a soup kitchen. You can give an overworked neighbor some free babysitting. By cultivating an atmosphere of growth, you charge your life with energy and happiness. Also, volunteering allows us to build and strengthen relationships with others. Ancient philosophers and contemporary scientists agree: If there's a single key to happiness, it's strong bonds with other people. Generous acts strengthen our bonds with others, and what's more, studies show that happiness is often boosted more by providing support to other people than by receiving it. I get more satisfaction out of thinking about the help that I've given to others than I do from thinking about how others have helped me (though gratitude is another key element to happiness). One of the most pernicious myths about happiness is that it's selfish to try to be happier. In fact, research and experience prove just the opposite. Happy people spend more time helping others and are more likely to volunteer and to give away money. They have stronger relationships with their families, friends, and coworkers. They're healthier, and they have healthier habits. Importantly, happiness gives people the emotional wherewithal to turn outward, to think about others, while the less happy are more likely to feel distrustful, isolated, and distracted by their own needs. Being happy doesn't make people want to drink piña coladas by the beach; it makes them want to figure out how to improve rural villagers' access to clean drinking water. However, while it's absolutely true that helping other people makes us happier, and that those who do feel a distinct "helper's high," it's also true that when we're unhappy, we often find it tough to make efforts to help others. Helping others would probably boost our happiness, but when we're unhappy, we tend to be preoccupied with our own problems. That's one reason why it's not selfish to strive to be happier: When we're happy, we're more likely to want to make others happy. I've observed this phenomenon in myself. One reason I started my happiness project was that I hoped if my life became happier, I'd become more generous, more thoughtful, more patient — and more eager to find ways to help other people. As Simon Patrick wrote, "If better were within, better would come out." And at least in my case, that has proved true. One cause for which I now volunteer my time, energy, and money is the New York Public Library. I love the library! Whether you want an excellent book to read, a tutorial on updating your résumé, a place to take a class to learn English as a second language, a great hangout for your teen after school, or a room full of research materials for your Ph.D. thesis about the history of the French Revolution, you'll find people and resources to help you — all for free. Throughout my life, I've been drawn to libraries. I love the sense of possibility and industry, the quiet company, and all those books. In college, whenever I was feeling blue, I'd go up to the stacks in the enormous main library. These days, I still often visit my neighborhood library in order to work. (Confession: One reason I go is that fleeing my home office is the only way I can resist the siren call of e-mail and the Internet.) Because I love libraries so much, I feel grateful to have the opportunity to help keep them strong. What's more, although the subject of self-esteem has generated a fair amount of controversy over the last few decades, it's clear that we don't get healthy self-esteem from constantly telling ourselves how great we are or even from other people's telling us how great we are. We get it from behaving in ways that we find worthy of our own respect — such as helping other people. And just as the research predicts, my small portion of work for the library has made me very happy. I've met many terrific people who share my love of reading and research. I've learned about treasure troves of books and materials that I'd never known existed. I've drawn closer to New York City because I've invested time and energy in one of its best institutions. I can even tell you the names of the two marble lions outside the New York Public Library's main building (Patience and Fortitude). I'm also deeply interested in the issue of organ donation. My husband has hepatitis C, and while he's in great health now, it's not impossible that he might one day be a candidate for a liver transplant. I appreciate the opportunity to use my time, energy, and money to help further the cause of organ donation. The need for organ donors is pressing, and while about 90% of Americans support organ donation, far fewer have taken steps to sign the organ-donor registry or to tell their families that if the opportunity arose, they'd want to be a donor. If, at this point in your life, you feel so overtaxed that you don't have one spare minute, one extra dollar, or one scrap of energy to spare, this is something you can do in less than a minute — and know that you've taken an extremely important step toward helping others. Take 30 seconds right now and sign the online registry at organdonor.gov. It's a Secret of Adulthood: Do good, feel good. More from Good Housekeeping 52 Ways to Beat Stress Get More Energy Take 5 Years Off! Complain So You Get Results 6 Women Who Make a Difference
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One of life's toughest money quandaries is how to get out of the red (debt) and build up more green (savings). You probably know firsthand just how tricky it is to achieve this: Should you really move money into an emergency fund when bills are piling up? And how can you funnel moolah into retirement accounts when you have a major balance on your credit card? Take this quiz and let me help you make the best decisions. 1. Which of these should be your priority? A. Paying off a credit card balance B. Saving for emergencies C. Both ANSWER: C With unemployment as high (and potentially long-lasting) as it is today, your emergency fund becomes a kind of insurance policy. You'll need a cash cushion if you wind up out of work especially because it's harder to access credit or loans when you aren't on a payroll. So take these steps: 1. Put together a plan to sock money away when you get paid (an automatic transfer to a savings account can work well). Your goal: to have at least six months of living expenses saved up more if you're self-employed or you support a family. 2. Transfer any high-interest credit card balances to a new account that allows you to lock in low or even zero interest for a generous period of time. If you have an excellent credit score (760 or above), you may qualify for 0% interest for at least a year; review your options at bankrate.com or credit.com. Paying a 0% rate instead of the average credit card rate of about 14% will save around $50 a month on a balance of $5,000, which in turn spares you $600 in interest over the year ahead. 3. Make sure you don't get shop-happy with your plastic. Don't charge anything you can't pay off before your grace period of low or zero interest expires. Once your emergency fund is shored up, you can tackle that credit card bill. By not paying (much) interest and not adding to the balance, you will erase that debt over time without doing so at the expense of your emergency fund. 2. Which should you save for first? A. The kids' future (college) B. Your future (retirement) ANSWER: B Focusing on your children's needs may seem loving, but if you underfund your retirement, you're likely to be a burden to them in the future. Most Americans are in dire straits when it comes to retirement savings: A recent survey found that 57% of working adults have less than $25,000 stashed away. Meanwhile, health care in retirement may cost over $100,000, even with Medicare! So let's say you're 35 and your daughter is 10. She has eight years until she'll need money for college, and you have 30 years until you retire. One hundred dollars a month invested in your retirement account, earning an average of 7%, would turn into $100,000-plus by age 65: You would earn $64,000 in investment returns alone! On the other hand, $100 a month invested in your daughter's 529 college savings account could grow to only around $11,322 after eight years (with a conservative return estimate of 4% because of the shorter time frame). In this example, putting $100 a month toward college instead of your retirement would mean losing around $62,000. Still want to help out with paying for that degree? Sock away extra funds in a tax-friendly 529 account, but only after you've funded your retirement as much as possible. For more info on college planning, head to finaid.org or edvisors.com. 3. If you have a little extra money, you should: A. Pay off the mortgage early B. Save more for retirement ANSWER: B Here's how to look at this scenario: Let's say you reach 60 and you've saved only $100,000 for retirement but have paid off your home, which is worth $300,000. As I mentioned, your health-care costs alone could be $100,000 or more in retirement, so you could hit 70 and be out of cash but sitting on a valuable house. Would you want to sell it and move at 70? Or take out a mortgage on your home to cover the bills? Your monthly payment might be much higher then, due both to the economy and to the fact that lenders can inflate your rate when you have little or no work income. Remember, you can't take your house to the supermarket to pay for groceries, so save as much as you can while you can. Consider adding a Roth or traditional IRA to any 401(k) savings. 4. Which bills should you pay first? Write checks for these three expenses right away: 1. Mortgage and property taxes Protecting the roof over your head should be your number one priority so your loan doesn't end up in foreclosure. Skip tax payments, and a lien could be put on your home. Short on funds? Contact your lender ASAP to request an accommodation; ask a counselor approved by the federal Department of Housing and Urban Development (hud.gov) for help. 2. Utilities This isn't about keeping cable TV, but about your home having heat, electricity, and an Internet connection, which you may need for work. Search for the Energy Savers Guide at energy.gov for ways to save. 3. Car payments Miss them, and you could lose your ride which may ,eam you can't get to work. If you can't cover the amount, it's time to get help from a free or low-cost credit counselor at nfcc.org. More from Good Housekeeping 5 Ways to Save $200+ on Your Car Costs Sweet Talk Your Way to More Money Simple Ways to Stretch Your Monthly Budget Best Store-Brand Household Products 10 Secrets of Super Savers Financial Goals You Can Actually Achieve
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More from Good Housekeeping 125 Simple Money-Saving Tips 50+ Bedroom Decorating Ideas Redecorate Your Living Room 12 Makeup Mistakes That Make You Look Old 5 Best Haircuts of All Time The conversation took place while we were driving to the mountains for a short ski trip over the kids' February break two years ago. A part of me knew it was coming — knew it, and dreaded it. For the holidays, my husband, Gordon, and I had surprised our 14-year-old with a fancy (read: expensive) mountain bike and our 12-year-old with a long-coveted video game system — plus the usual hoodies, books, iTunes gift cards, and stocking stuffers. We were both struggling with our annual post-indulgence hangover, only this time the feeling was more acute. Although Gordon and I, both self-employed, still had work, it was a leaner-than-normal year, and we were living paycheck to irregular paycheck. We had four years to save for college, 20 or so years to add to our meager retirement accounts. So I wasn't surprised when Gordon glanced at me glumly and said, "We have to stop spending so much money." Our money conversations usually fall somewhere on the spectrum between awkward and acrimonious, which is why we discuss finances about as often as we hash over his prostate health. But that day I knew Gordon's comment wasn't an accusation; it was an attempt to reach an amicable accord. "Yeah, you're right; we've been a little out of control lately," I agreed. Over the previous five years or so, I had racked up a lot of debt — five figures' worth — a somewhat stunning amount that had advanced stealthily, like dry rot, while I was distracted with other things: deadlines, the kids' homework and sports, keeping up with the laundry. I still have no idea where I spent it all. Daily chai lattes at Starbucks? Plane tickets for our annual summer vacation? Clothes? Gifts? Groceries? It's impossible to identify one culprit. I simply frittered it away, as my mom would say. And I suspected Gordon was similarly saddled with debt. I wasn't sure, because we'd always kept our money completely separate, on the theory that our erratic incomes and inherent disorganization would doom any attempt at joint banking. Besides, I'd never wanted him scrutinizing my spending habits any more than he wanted me poking around in his. We'd each taken charge of certain bills — he paid the big stuff, like the mortgage and property taxes, while I handled most of the other monthly expenses, including the majority of the groceries — and we bailed each other out if one of us ran short on cash. Our arrangement had helped us avoid big money battles, but with no spousal oversight, we'd both been guilty of spending too much and saving too little. "Maybe we should each make a budget," I said tentatively, a part of me secretly hoping he'd say no. He looked at me with surprise, like I'd just suggested we pull off to the side of the road for a quickie. "Really? You'd do that?" "Sure; I guess," I said. He already looked more cheerful. "Let's do it when we get home." Even then, our determination might have faded — we'd made big promises before about sitting down and hammering out a budget — had it not been for a curious bit of serendipity. When we got home from our trip, there was a copy of a book in our mailbox, sent by my editor at Good Housekeeping. Called Wealth Watchers: A Simple Program to Help You Spend Less and Save More, it applies the principles of Weight Watchers to finances. The premise is simple: Set a daily spending goal, just like you'd set a daily calorie goal, by determining how much cash you actually have available to spend every day; track your daily spending; and watch the debt (like the pounds) melt away and the savings pile up. Alice Wood, the book's author, says she and her husband spent $12,000 less the first year they followed the program than they had the year before. I couldn't imagine cutting even a tenth of that, but I was willing to try. Still, we dragged our feet before starting, blaming the usual culprits: work, stress, our over-packed schedules. Finally, at the end of April, we resolved to put ourselves on a financial diet. We broke the news to the boys over dinner one night. Will, the older and more emotionally savvy of the two, said it sounded like a good idea, while Griffin moaned, "Awwwwww, nooooo! Why? We won't ever be able to do anything!" We assured him that we intended to trim the budget, not machete it — that we just wanted the whole family to become more aware of the difference between wants and needs. Will rolled his eyes, recognizing this new material as part of our ongoing series of Responsible-Behavior Speeches, but Griff brightened. "OK," he said. "I need to go see Iron Man 2 this weekend." Clearly, this wasn't going to be easy. I called Wood to see what she advised to help us stay the course. She suggested we ask another family to try the program, too — the theory being that behavior change is easier if you have other people offering support and encouragement. There's the Weight Watchers influence again. We enlisted the help of our friends Susan and Charlie, who'd lost their longtime, lucrative jobs — she was in commercial real estate, he was a menswear designer — within two weeks of each other 10 months before and had only piecemeal work since then. Because they didn't have any debt aside from their mortgage and had wisely set aside a solid year's worth of living expenses, they'd been able to stay afloat without making drastic changes like raiding their retirement accounts or selling their home. They'd already cut out most discretionary spending — yard maintenance, expensive haircuts, clothes shopping, gifts. But with no real job prospects on the horizon and two kids around the same ages as ours, we knew they were motivated to pinch pennies — and would be inspiring role models for Gordon and me. Still, I wondered: After 17 years of haphazard spending, could we really trim our budget and get our finances under control? Real Stories from Budget-Minded Families HOW TO START Budgeting 101 The first step in the program sounds simple: Fill out a monthly budget worksheet. All I have to do is subtract my fixed and semi-fixed monthly expenses — things like the family phone bill, health and car insurance, gas and electric, and debt financing — from my monthly net income (after taxes) to determine the amount I can spend every month without going into more debt, then divide that number by 30 (the average number of days per month) to arrive at my daily spending allowance. "If you want to stay on top of your spending, that's the magic number," says Wood. "Otherwise you're operating in the dark." Finally, at age 47, I'm heading toward the light of fiscal responsibility. Hallelujah! Feeling virtuous, I begin the worksheet — and am stymied on line one: monthly net income. Since I'm a freelance writer, my income can vary from as much as $6,000 a month to as little as $1,600. Without a fixed number to work with, how am I supposed to start? Feeling a little embarrassed — can I really be stuck already — I call Wood, who before starting Wealth Watchers was an estate-planning attorney. "There are lots of people in your position," she says. "Make a conservative estimate of your monthly income. Think negatively. People always believe they're going to make more and spend less than they do. That sort of optimism can be ruinous." Embracing my inner pessimist, I jot down a low-ish monthly income, then subtract my fixed monthly expenses. By the time I reach the bottom line, I'm a little nauseated: I have $90.73 to spend per day. But I often spend $200 or more in a single trip to the grocery store! When I mention this to Wood, she says it's fine to blow past your per diem one day, so long as you make up for it by spending less over the next few days. It turns out my daily allotment is just $5 more than that of Charlie and Susan, who've been unemployed for a year — and it's all because I need to put so much toward my credit card debt. I have four cards with balances; Wood says you should never have more than two cards and they should be paid off monthly. I use all but one card infrequently, and always make more than the minimum monthly payments, but even so it will take nearly five years of abstemious scrimping to pay them all off. I'm starting to understand the consequences of that mini Everest of debt — and the necessity of digging out. Ugh. I should count my blessings, though. Plenty of people who do Wood's calculations find that their fixed expenses exceed their income, a situation that makes the next step in the Wealth Watchers program — finding ways to minimize your fixed and semi-fixed expenses — not just helpful, but critical. Wood says she saved $7,000 a year just by finding lower-cost car, health, and life insurance. I feel sure we wouldn't save more than a few hundred dollars a year by switching carriers, because we tend to go bare bones from the outset (we've never shelled out for HBO on our cable plan, for instance) — and I don't have the time or temperament to make all those calls — so I skip this step. But Susan does it and manages to save a little by reducing insurance coverage on both her car and her house. "It's not a game changer," she says, "but in our situation, every little bit helps." When Gordon returns, exhausted, from a three-day business trip, I ask him how his Wealth Watchers calculations are going. He mumbles something about "work" and "way behind" — not a good sign — but he's so wiped out, I decide to leave him alone. WEEK ONE Scrutinizing My Spending The Wealth Watchers plan requires you to write down every single thing you spend every single day. Will wants $5 for lunch? I dig through my purse, find the notebook included with the book, and write it down. I've spent $9.74 for a new razor, or $3.26 for a latte? Down it goes in the notebook. It's a massive pain in the butt, because it's yet another chore in my already demand-filled day, but Susan, who can always be counted on to see the bright side, points out the big plus. "It forces you to have a 'think-before-you spend moment,'" she says, quoting Wood. "When I realize I'm going to be held accountable for what I buy, it's easier for me to say no to things I don't need." I see what she means, and yet already I've succumbed to the siren song of unnecessary stuff. I know enough to stay away from Nordstrom and Anthropologie when I'm trying to save money, but one afternoon I stroll into my favorite consignment store — used equals cheap, right? — where I find racks of trendy summer shirts. I already own enough shirts to clothe a small village, but I pull a few out and try them on anyway. They all fit perfectly. Together they come to $72, not much below my daily spending allowance. With regret, I start to put them back. Then the saleswoman says, "Did I mention that today only, all shirts are 15 percent off?" My credit card is out of my wallet and on the counter before I can think, What would Wealth Watchers say? The total, including our 9 percent sales tax, is $66.70. "What a great deal!" the saleswoman chirps. But when I log the purchase in my notebook, I can hear my own lecturing-the-kids voice ask, Now, Ginny, tell me: Was that a want or a need? What I need — far more than another top — is help getting my several-hundred-dollars-a-month clothing habit under control, so I call Sally Palaian, Ph.D., a psychologist and money coach in Detroit. When I describe my dizzyingly fast splurge, she says, "There are certain words, like 'sale,' that can trigger spending. You need to build in a buffer period — time to think about every purchase before you buy it. Next time you want something, wait a day, or call a friend and run it by her. Another thing that's helpful is to tape a note to your credit card that says, 'Do I really need this?'" The note strategy works well, I find, when it comes to sweet treats. When I ask myself, Do you really need a coffee drink or a cupcake — expensive and caloric? the answer is always no. But clothing is harder for me to resist. Susan, who's put herself on a strict no-shopping regimen, has been having old clothes altered so they seem new and is particularly happy with an old below-the-knee-length skirt that's now more of a mini. "But I miss getting new things," she admits. Wood suggests I try to treat my closet more like a store. "When you want to buy something, go home and look through your closet first to see what you already have that's similar," she says. "It's amazing how often the thing you want is almost the same as something you already have." I think guiltily of the 40 pairs of jeans that are spilling out of my closet and realize she has a point. Clearly I need all the help I can get, so I also decide to try a wacky strategy I heard a friend mention not long ago: I put my credit cards in the freezer — a symbolic move that will, hopefully, put a chill on my shopping. WEEK ONE REALITY CHECK $3.47 under budget. Time to buckle down and get serious. WEEK TWO Supermarket Strategies At more than $1,000 a month, food is the single biggest discretionary expense in my budget. We eat out just once or twice a week. The bigger problem is the grocery store, where I shop aisle by aisle, loading up the cart with random items — a sure way to overspend, according to Wood — rather than using Susan's strategy: creating a list for her weekly Sunday shopping trip and buying only the things she knows she absolutely needs. I try to become a list-maker. After just two attempts I realize why it doesn't work for me: a) our tastes and schedules are unpredictable, so the chicken I buy for Tuesday sits till Friday, when I end up throwing it out; b) I forget to put things on the list, so I'm forever running back to the store for, say, eggs or apples; c) I hate shopping with a list — it's too regimented, too restrictive, too un-fun. I like to let whim and taste guide me. The question is, can they guide me to less expensive items? Turns out, they can — sort of. I buy less meat and more fresh veggies. Instead of chips, I pick up supercheap plain pop-corn and spruce it up with a little salt, Parmesan cheese, and butter for the boys' lunches. Surprisingly, they don't complain. In place of the mango, papaya, and pomegranate juice the boys glug down by the jugful, I buy frozen OJ and powdered lemonade: not as healthy, but a significant savings. Will says he doesn't like orange juice, but when I explain that it's less expensive, he drinks it or opts for tap water — free, and healthful. The boys are grudgingly getting with the program in other ways, too. They agree to take sandwiches from home rather than buy their lunch at school every day, and when they hear the price of a surf camp they wanted to go to in the coming summer, Griff says, "That's stupid. We don't have to go." An obvious way to cut our expenses would be to buy conventionally grown food instead of organic, but I'm torn — actually, more like tortured. For years I've shelled out for organic because I believe it's healthier and better for the environment — and in northern California, where I live, it's considered practically negligent not to buy organic. But the price! I dither for a full five minutes in front of the milk: Should I continue forking over $6.99 for a gallon of organic or save $3 by switching to regular? For help, I employ an eye-opening calculation Wood calls The Power of 365. "Multiply any potential savings — even $1 — by 365 days a year, and you'll get a graphic sense of its value," she says. "A $4 latte every day costs $1,460. That's a pricey habit." Since I only buy milk twice a week, I use a modified version: The Power of 104. The upshot: I spend $312 more every year so we can drink milk from hormone-free cows. Is it worth it? After much agonized mulling, I fall back on my own mathematical equation: Guilt Calculus. The guilt I feel over spending the extra money is less than the guilt I would feel over watching my kids chug down glass after glass of potentially chemical-laden milk every day. I buy the organic. In the produce department, I'm paralyzed again by the organic-versus-conventional impasse. Instead of pears and plums, I see difficult choices. Brain sputtering from decision deadlock, I leave with just one bag of organic grapes ($3.99 a pound, versus $2.49 for conventional). When I mention my produce-aisle panic to Susan, healthy eater extraordinaire, she admits, "I don't buy everything organic anymore. I use the Environmental Working Group's guide to pesticides on produce to decide when I can get away with conventional." It lists 53 fruits and vegetables from most to least contaminated (ewg.org/foodnews/list). I print it out and stick it in my purse to use as a shopping guide. Phew.... WEEK TWO REALITY CHECK $80.08 under budget. I rock! WEEK THREE Blindsided! We have a small party for the boys' birthdays, which fall in the same week — surfing (free) followed by dinner at a burger joint ($113, with tip, for eight people). We give them each one thing they really need — Griff gets a bicycle helmet, Will gets biking shorts — and tell them we'll pay for the two bikes they're building out of spare parts at the local cycling co-op, which should cost less than $50 each. They don't whine. They don't look disappointed. Indeed, they seem thrilled — so thrilled that Griff suggests they head to the bike co-op right away, even though it's 8 P.M. on a school night. After the party, I finally broach the money subject with Gordon. I've suspected for a while that he isn't exactly adhering to the program. Turns out, he's blown it off entirely. I'm ticked. What happened to Mr. Gung Ho "Let's Get Our Spending Under Control"? "It was too hard to write everything down," he admits. "I only got as far as the calculations to find my daily spending money. I try to keep that figure in mind when I spend money during the day, but really my biggest expense is lunches. You know me; I don't shop." It's true. When he wanted a new mountain bike a few years ago, he saved for 19 months. I become less angry when I realize he actually has himself on a tighter budgetary leash than I do. He allows himself just $700 of discretionary spending money per month so that he can pay down our line of credit, put money toward our income taxes (a hefty sum, since we're both self-employed), and add a little to our retirement accounts — an expense he usually covers for both of us. Because he has little to spare after those big outlays, he exceeds his budget largely due to unexpected big-ticket items — the fridge that dies the day we return from vacation; the TV that flames out in the middle of the Winter Olympics, when our viewing is at an all-time high. What can you do about that? Plenty, according to Stuart Vyse, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at Connecticut College and author of Going Broke: Why Americans Can't Hold On to Their Money. "In our minds, things like cars breaking down are unexpected, but of course they're really not. Things break all the time. If you want to stay out of debt, you need to plan for the unexpected — and have money set aside to pay for it," says Vyse. Wood has a simple solution: Use your savings account as your emergency fund, and put a little money into it every month. "Even if it's just $25, it adds up over time," she says. Two days later, I have the opportunity to learn — in painful, graphic detail — why it's important to have a cushion to cover the unexpected. When I sit down at my computer, I get an error message saying the hard drive is unavailable. I reboot; I unplug; I pound on the keys. Nothing. The repair-shop techie shakes his head: "I can't access it at all. I hope you backed up your data." The computer is just 18 months old! Why would I back up my data? He refers me to a local company — the Special Ops of data retrieval. "If anyone can get your files, they can," he says. Three days after I drop off my hard drive, they call me. They can retrieve everything — for $2,197.67. I think about it for a day, crying intermittently the whole time. Even if I didn't spend a dime for the rest of the month, I couldn't afford it out of pocket. Gordon, still feeling contrite for his lack of participation in the program, offers to pay for it, but he doesn't have the cash, either. I pull a frosty credit card from the freezer — the one with the taped-on note that says, "Do I really need this?" Unfortunately, the answer is yes. WEEK THREE REALITY CHECK $2,357.67 over budget. In addition to my computer catastrophe, Griff started seeing an $80-per-hour tutor once a week — and I failed to adjust my spending to take it into account. WEEK FOUR Scrimp-a-thon I become monkishly frugal. I make dinners from the pasta, soup, and frozen pizza we already have on hand, go for a hike with my friend Rene instead of meeting her for dinner, and cozy up with Gordon and the boys on the couch to watch a flick from On Demand instead of going to the theater. We actually spend more time together as a family than we have all month. It's wonderful. "We all think new things are going to make us happy, but there's ample evidence that what really moves the needle on happiness is social connections — spending time with family and friends," says Ron Wilcox, Ph.D., professor of business administration at the University of Virginia Darden School and author of Whatever Happened to Thrift? Why Americans Don't Save and What to Do About It. "It can help to keep that in mind when you're struggling with money." The boys, still wary from my day-long computer-related crying jag, don't hit me up for cash all week long — a very unusual occurrence. When some friends ask them to meet for a milkshake after school, they pour out their jar of change and start counting their quarters and dimes. The old me would've swooped in and pressed a $10 bill into their hands; the new me decides to see if they can swing it themselves. And they do — but it reminds me that if I don't want my sons to nickel-and-dime me forever, I need to figure out a way for them to start earning their own money. Wood is anti-allowance, on the theory that kids need to learn to connect money with work — a notion that makes a lot of sense to me — so Gordon and I decide to give the boys each $5 for every load of laundry that they wash, fold, and put away and another $5 for each time they mow the lawn. They think the idea "sucks big-time" — but why wouldn't they? They've gotten used to being handed $20 every time they ask. "Our new approach to money is going to take some getting used to," I tell the boys. "But it's important for you to learn to be financially responsible." And it's then that it hits me: As painful and, in ways, disappointing as this month has been, there's really no turning back. WEEK FOUR REALITY CHECK $214.74 under budget. Which still leaves me $2,142.93 in the hole for the month. Susan and Charlie, our friends and partners in downsizing, didn't do any better in terms of meeting their money goals. "We spent about $155 per day on average [versus their budget of just under $86 per day], so we wound up spending more than $2,000 over what we should have for the month," Susan says. "The daily journaling process was a useful barometer for seeing in real time where exactly our money went. But even so, we still weren't able to rein in our spending enough to stay within the budget we had established," she explains. But now that I've been tracking how much money I have and where every cent of it goes over the past few weeks, my attitude toward spending has changed. On the spectrum from fashionista to frugalista, I've taken a giant step toward the middle — and I like the way it feels, even if I happen to be wearing last year's boots. PAYING IT DOWN Postscript It's been more than a year since our foray into the world of financial responsibility, and some lessons have stuck. I've increased the amount I put into savings every month from $25 to $100, and I haven't had to tap into it for emergencies, so it's gradually building up. And just knowing I have about $90 of discretionary money to spend every day has made me way more aware of the price of everything I buy. That said, I no longer write down everything I spend, and I've made some blunders, particularly this past December, when I reverted to a one-for-you, one-for-me style of Christmas shopping and wound up blowing way past my budget. Still, I've managed to pay down nearly $10,000 of my credit card debt. The big surprise, though, is Gordon, who seemed so unmotivated at first. He has paid off a hefty chunk of our line of credit and is almost free of credit card debt. "Even though I didn't adhere strictly to the program, we've started talking so much more about spending that it made me think more about where my money is going," he says. "Besides, it felt like a competition, and you know me: I like to win." And as for Susan and Charlie, she's working at an hourly rate at a compensation-consulting firm; he just got a full-time job as a designer for a bicycle-apparel company. Though they are thrilled to be on their way to recovery, they wound up spending nearly $25,000 of their savings last year since they earned just 30% of their previous usual income. "I still try to stay close to my Wealth Watchers daily spending amount, but the truth is, without our savings we'd be sunk," Susan says — which gives me all the more motivation to keep being the biggest saver I can possibly be. $200 SAVED Thrift shop vs. designer $832 SAVED Home brew vs. Starbucks $350 SAVED Consignment vs. designer $650 SAVED Bike co-op vs. new $100 SAVED Thrift store vs. Crate & Barrel $645 SAVED Store brand vs. premium $250 SAVED Popcorn vs. gourmet chips • Food, while a necessity, is a discretionary expense. Do not go food-shopping without a list. • Do a wardrobe inventory before you go shopping for clothing. Beware of the temptation to save money by buying a discounted item. Remember that you can go broke trying to save money. • Know how much your vacation will cost, and do your best to set aside the entire amount before you go. • The best gifts come from the heart. Being thoughtful doesn't have to be expensive. • Dry cleaning is an expense that is also an investment. It's important to take good care of your clothes so you won't have to replace them frequently. • Some of the best things in life really are free. Check your community- events calendar for free or inexpensive entertainment in your area. • A wise person once said, "Parents who give their kids everything give their kids nothing." There's nothing wrong with telling kids, "It's not in our budget." • Something will always go wrong (medical expenses, car trouble) — especially if you're not ready for it to happen. Talk to a banker about automatically transferring a certain amount of money each month into a savings account that you can use as a safety net.
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More from Glamour 10 Things He's Thinking When You're Naked 15 Things Men Don't Want You to Know About Them 7 Ways to Convince Any Man You're Right His Top 10 Sex Wishes Revealed 12 Secret Signs He's Into You You like your coworkers; some, you even love. So it's fine to tell them everything about your life outside the office, right? Not always -- discretion is still critical in the workplace, career coaches told Glamour. To know what's safe to share and what's not, start by feeling out the office culture, then follow this advice. The situation: You Have a Killer Hangover What to share: If you had one too many last night, keep your lips zipped. "A party girl who can barely drag her bones to the office isn't seen as a go-getter," says Erin Riley, a human resources rep for the Los Angeles County Department of Health Services. "You want to be known as the woman who gets the job done." As for your dating life, it's fine to unburden a bit, but skip the details of, say, your boyfriend's baby-mama crisis. The situation: You're Facing a Health Issue What to share: If you need time off during working hours for medical care, you should tell your employer your diagnosis. (Write a letter to human resources if you want to avoid an emotional conversation, says Riley.) You can tell your coworkers the news if you're very close, but it's best not to discuss the specifics, says Nan Mooney, author of I Can't Believe She Did That!: Why Women Betray Other Women at Work or you may be thought of as a sick person. If your partner is causing the health issue, meaning he's abusive, your HR department likely has a plan to help you. Tell them. The situation: You're Deeply Religious What to share: Just the facts. Sometimes the topic of religion is pertinent -- for example, if you are Muslim and don't drink, yet want to hit happy hour with your team. But talk objectively, experts advise, and never try to convert your cubemate. The situation: You're Unhappy at Work What to share: Disclose select details if you're sure your confidante will stay mum, says human resources manager Ana Vazquez. A new perspective may be just what you need to turn things around. Get more great career advice from Better Yourself Video: How to Recover from a Workplace Blunder>
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It's official: Bangs are back in a big way this season. Whether you have curly, wavy, or straight hair, there's flattering fringe that will work for you. Check out these celebrity haircuts for inspiration. Celebrity haircut: Taylor Swift's blunt bangs We know breaking up makes for a catchy love song, but we sure hope Taylor Swift doesn't write about leaving her current hairstyle any time soon. Her "blunt, straight-across bangs look best on oval faces," says Clairol professional celebrity colorist Kiyah Wright. A style with tons of structure like this one needs a trim every two weeks, but Taylor's sexy look proves it's so worth the upkeep. Celebrity haircut: Kim Kardashian's full bangs Keeping up with a Kardashian's hairstyle is no easy task, but we're obsessed with the way Kim Kardashian experiments with her look. "Full bangs are in right now," says Wright. "To achieve this hairstyle, ask your stylist to start closer to the crown of the head in a pie section." The bangs are full and wide with a soft layer around the edges, which enhances cheekbones in a majorly flattering way. Celebrity haircut: Dianna Agron's side-swept bangs Looks like we have something to be gleeful about too! A hot new red hair color paired with shiny, side-swept bangs is easy to pull-off on a shoulder-length bob like Dianna Agron's. Just ask for layered bangs that flow seamlessly into the rest of your hair. Bonus points: The longer length means they'll grow out flawlessly. Celebrity haircut: Michelle Obama's rounded bangs Michelle Obama's new haircut was the bang heard around the world. We love the way her fringe falls at eyelash level and extends past her cheekbones for a modern yet polished effect. Plus, the rounded sides open up her face and flatter her gorge smile, says Wright. Celebrity haircut: Kelly Rowland's longer bangs The ladies of Destiny's Child (fingers crossed a reunion will happen!) have come a long way with their beauty looks, and we can't help but stop and stare at Kelly Rowland's mile-long locks. Add instant oomph to Rapunzel-like hair with thick fringe that stops right before your cheekbones. "A style like this looks great on those with oblong faces, as it covers a lot of the length of the face to balance it out," says Wright. Celebrity haircut: Helena Christensen's shorter bangs For a sexy cut like Helena Christensen's, ask for bangs that hit just above the brows, leaving the heaviest pieces at the sides to round out a square face shape. "Bangs that start a little bit shorter like this one give clients an extra week or so before having to trim them again," says Wright. Celebrity haircut: Kimberly Caldwell's layered bangs Whether you already have a natural wave to your hair or you want to style it like Kimberly Caldwell's, side-swept bangs look fun and edgy with lots of layers and cool piece-iness. It's also a great "in-between" look when you're transitioning between cuts. "To accessorize your look between trims, try hair barrettes and colored bobby pins to accent your bangs, pull them to one side, or part hair down the middle," says Wright. Celebrity haircut: Emma Stone's feathery bangs Layered bangs like Emma Stone's look fab on all hair types with the help of a single beauty product hairspray. Spritz it on your fingers, then comb your fingertips through your bangs to maintain the feathery effect. Celebrity haircut: Amber Riley's voluminous bangs If you want bouncy side-swept bangs like Amber Riley's, "ask for fringe that will fall just above the eyebrows after you style them," says celeb stylist and beauty blogger Kristan Serafino. The best part? "It can work on any hair texture and is so easy to maintain." Just use a dab of defrizzing shine serum and blow-dry with a large round brush to get a voluminous finish. Celebrity haircut: Jessica Biel's perfectly even bangs Sure having Justin Timberlake at our side would make us all smiles too, but for now you can be glad that achieving a hairstyle like Jessica Biel's is totally doable. "You want to make sure your stylist cuts your fringe while the hair is dry," says Serafino. "This way you'll see exactly how it'll fall after you blow-dry them." Celebrity haircut: Mena Suvari's faux bangs Hair commitment-phobe? No sweat! "For anyone wanting to test the waters for wearing fringe, this style is the perfect set of training wheels," says Serafino. "It's long enough to tuck back behind the ears or pull in a ponytail, but the length still draws attention to the eyes." Celebrity haircut: Rose Byrne's straight bangs Leave it to Rose Byrne to avoid the awkward stage of growing out your bangs altogether. We love the way she keeps the longer fringe stick straight for a completely different look from her former blunt bangs. "For a deep-parted side fringe have your stylist use the outside corner of the eyebrow as a guide for parting the hair," says Serafino. Celebrity haircut: Hannah Simone's front-and-center bangs This New Girl star makes us want to get a new hairdo. Using your bang's BFF, a conditioning boosting serum (try L'Oreal Professionnel Mythic Oil, $32; lpsalons.com), you can score a healthy-looking 'do like Hannah Simone's in a flash. Tucking the rest of your hair behind your ears adds more drama and shows off your cheekbones. Celebrity haircut: Michelle Williams' pixie-cut bangs We're digging this sort of do-it-yourself bangs experiment Michelle Williams road-tested by growing out her cropped pixie cut. She creates a "sweeping fringe as the hair begins to grow out and styles it toward the side," says Serafino. Prep your tresses with a straightening lotion like Pravana Relax Straightening Creme ($17.40; pravana.com) to wet hair and blow-dry hair toward the face for a cool twist. Celebrity haircut: Minka Kelly's curled bangs An easy, long side fringe like Minka Kelly's draws attention to your eyes. They're long enough to use rollers or a large-barrel curling iron to give them a glam tweak. Celebrity haircut: Carly Rae Jepsen's far-back bangs Call us crazy, but we'd beg, borrow, and steal for Carly Rae Jepsen's full set of statement fringe. Have your stylist cut bangs from the top of the head, so hair creates an even waterfall effect. Celebrity haircut: Kerry Washington's wispy bangs Kerry Washington's heart-shaped face and smaller features don't require a bold fringe, says Cutler stylist Kelsy Osterman. "A few strands of short peekaboo bangs look balanced, especially when paired with fuller, bouncier curls," she says. Celebrity haircut: Carrie Underwood's soft bangs Carrie Underwood might be blown away in her songs, but her adorable hairstyle is what makes us do a double take. People with square faces like Carrie can pull off a thin layer of bangs that just graze the forehead, says Osterman. "It really freshens up her look and accentuates the best part of her facial features," she adds. Celebrity haircut: Zooey Deschanel's choppy bangs To copy Zooey Deschanel's signature style, ask for choppy bangs that you can easily toss to the side or leave grazing your brow. It works best on those who already have natural texture to their tresses, but a dab of pomade like Bumble & Bumble's Semisumo product ($27; sephora.com) creates a similar effect. Celebrity haircut: Sophia Bush's straight-across bangs Sophia Bush debuted her dramatic blunt bangs earlier this year, and we like how they flatter her almond-shaped eyes. "Bangs that are cut straight across like Sophia's are best for those with heart- or oval-shaped faces," says L'Oreal Professionnel ambassador Eva Scrivo. Ask your stylist for a super-thick fringe and be ready to show off this standout style. Celebrity haircut: Chloe Moretz's barely there bangs If only we looked this good in our teens! Chloe Moretz takes her midlength hairstyle up a notch with a subtle-yet-sophisticated swoop of barely there side bangs. Celebrity haircut: Alexa Chung's bedhead bangs Alexa Chung proves that bangs don't need to be styled perfectly to look cute. Bedhead-inspired fringe is laid-back yet flirty when it's parted in the middle. Be sure to use texturizing powder in between trims to mask any imperfections, says Scrivo. Celebrity haircut: Lea Michele's tapered bangs Insider secret: Keep your long bangs like Lea Michele's looking fresh by pulling the rest of your hair back into a ponytail and washing your bangs when you wash your face, says Scrivo. "This way you refresh your style without having to wash the whole head each time." To get her look, ask for bangs that are tapered at the ends, says Scrivo. For a whole different vibe, gently push long bangs to the side so they're angled but not completely side-swept. Celebrity haircut: Ashley Madekwe's tousled bangs Revenge never looked sweeter than when you're rocking a great hairdo like the soapy star Ashley Madekwe's. Perfect for hitting the Hamptons (or wherever) this summer, these longer-length bangs look great tousled or straight. Celebrity haircut: Solange Knowles' curly bangs If you're lucky enough to have amazing curls like Solange Knowles, pull a few tendrils to the front of your hair and setting with hairspray to amp up your gorgeous locks. Who knew such a small twist could make a huge difference?
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1. Give lifesaving meds. $5 to faceaids.org will give an HIV-positive pregnant woman in Rwanda vital drugs to help prevent transmission of the virus to her baby. 2. Save a pet. A gift of $50 to animaladvocatesalliance.org bails a dog or cat out of a high-kill shelter and provides vet care and medicine to help it get healthy for adoption. 3. Teach Gen Next. A full 67 million children worldwide aren't attending elementary classes today. Just $25 to pencilsofpromise.org sends one child to a new school in a developing country for 78 days; $118 covers an entire year. 4. Give the jobless a leg up with a pair of slacks or other office clothes your guy is no longer wearing. Careergear.org coaches down-on-their-luck men on how to land a job and loans them the attire to ace the interview. 5. Donate your old cell phone to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (ncadv.org), which will refurbish and sell it, then use the proceeds to get survivors back on their feet. 6. Send a teddy bear to the child of a deployed marine. For $25, jonathancollins.org gives a plush toy with a voice message recorded by the parent, which will play when the paw is pressed. 7. Pick up the grocery tab for a senior. Some 3.5 million Americans over age 50 don't have enough to eat; $8 to drivetoendhunger.org feeds one of them healthy meals for a day. 8. Protect newborns in India. $50 helps keep nine babies alive with a genius incubatorlike invention. Go to embraceglobal.org. 9. Help women get free mammograms. Just click the pink button at thebreastcancersite.com. Last year they funded a whopping 2,112 screenings for needy American women. 10. Provide clean H20. Your gift of $30 to wellsbringhope.org gives one villager in West Africa access to safe water and good sanitation for more than 30 years, drastically reducing child mortality. 11. Inspire the next Taylor Swift. Fendermusicfoundation.org uses your $50 to give a guitar to a struggling music program, letting 20 kids play through the school year. 12. Play fairy godmother to a teenage girl who can't afford a prom dress. Donate the old gown gathering dust in your closet (or any special- occasion accessories) to princessproject.org. 13. Shop for art's sake. Heart of Haiti gifts ($10 to $120) at macys.com provide steady work for many Haitians. 14. Start a reading chain. Guatemala has the highest illiteracy rate in Central America; $10 to readingvillage.org helps pay school fees for rural teen leaders, who in turn teach younger children to read. 15. Clear the air. An estimated 20 million Americans suffer from debilitating asthma, and dirty air can trigger attacks. Any donation to cleartheair.edf.org defends our breathing supply from polluters. 16. Coupon for a cause. Here's a win-win: At cause on.com you get deals on everything from scrapbooks to luxurious spa services, and 20 percent of the site's proceeds goes to a variety of charities in your community. 17. Help shape a new Egypt. Check out Glamour Women of the Year Fund winner Esraa Fattah on page 210. A gift to vitalvoices.org will support the Egyptian women who have fought so hard for change, and give them a voice in their country's future. 18. Make a difference in your zip code. Volunteer match.org connects you with ways to improve your neighborhood, like working at a food bank, clowning around with seniors and coaching a girls' soccer team. 19. Prevent blindness. Buy Toms glasses ($135 and up, toms.com) and give someone in Asia sight-saving treatment. 20. Pass on your copy of Twilight and other faves to globalliteracyproject.org, which will get books to deprived youth, helping them learn to read. 21. Put sexual abusers behind bars. Your donation to equalitynow.org helps provide legal support, counseling and job training to victims pursuing cases against their assailants around the world. 22. Say "hats off" to ending poverty. Cute crocheted caps for $35 and under keep women in Uganda working and educated. Visit krochetkids.org. 23. Get girls up to speed. Your $50 gift to afghaninstituteoflearning.org will allow two Afghan girls to take computer lessons for six months. 24. Stop bullying for good. Laura and Kirk Smalley lost their tormented son, Ty, 11, to suicide; $25 dollars to standforthesilent.org helps them speak to student groups and prevent more deaths. 25. Preserve our precious oceans. Save half a mile from overfishing and pollution with a $38 gift to conservation.org. 26. Pay a student's bus fare. $40 to Olivia Wilde's artistsforpeaceandjustice.org gets a child from the slums of Haiti to a new school for two months. 27. Buy a counseling session for a soldier returning home after serving in Iraq or Afghanistan with your $17 donation to www.giveanhour.org. 28. Care for a chimp orphaned or harmed by hunters or pet sellers. Just $10 to janegoodall.org buys 22 pounds of food at the renowned primatologist's clinic in the Republic of Congo. 29. Help women in war-torn countries start a business: $25 buys one woman a sewing kit so she can earn a living as a tailor. Go to womenforwomen.org. 30. Aid a woman while stopping deforestation. $2 to greenbeltmovement.org, started by the late Nobel Prize winner Wangari Maathai, pays a disadvantaged gal in Kenya to plant a tree. 31. Get a salad on the table and an at-risk teen on a healthy path. For $25, whyhunger.org helps needy kids grow produce, both for their family's fridge and to sell at farmers' markets.
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Once upon a time, fire pits were built out of necessity, for both warmth and cooking. But today's fire pits are more stylish than ever. The new fire pits including gas-powered versions add serious drama when it's time for s'mores. Fire bowl Source: Zillow No chopping wood here! These sleek and modern fire pits are often built out of a concrete and Fiberglas mix to create a lightweight structure. Fuel canisters sit within the pit and are easily refillable. Any fire-proof substance can be added to the fire bowl for an appealing display even when the fire is out. Source: Urban Oasis"> Source: Urban Oasis A fire pit with a deep basin can provide significant warmth for an outdoor seating area. Source: StoneToYou Ash-colored firestone pebbles surround the gas flame in this fire bowl. This fire pit comes with on/off key for easy control. Fire pit table Source: Zillow Go for a two-in-one style. Many of these fire pit and table combinations come with lids to cover the fire pit when it's not in use. These styles work with gas-powered and wood fire pits. Source: New Image Landscape and Pools This fire pit is built out of Travertine stone. The naturally-occurring material is one of the most durable on the market. Source: Alderwood Landscape A fire pit with stone details creates a gathering place at the edge of a yard. Fire and water Source: Zillow Don't choose between a fountain and a fire pit. Ready-made fire pit fountains make it easy to combine both elements. Or, create your own water fire pit by adding an above ground pit to a water feature. As long as you can safely run a gas line, or ensure fuel canisters remain dry, you can enjoy the combination of water and fire. Source: Pebble Tec Add free-standing fire pits to the edge of a pool for an easy fire-plus-water installation. Fire as art Source: Garden Studio Design Fuel canisters or gas lines make it possible to add flames to any fire pit installation. Source: Third Rock Gas Fireplace Global warming goes literal with this unusual fire pit. See more fire pit ideas on Zillow Digs . Related: Dress up Your Front Porch on a Budget How to Care for Your Grill 4 Tips to Create a Perfect Outdoor Living Room Erika Riggs , the Zillow Digs manager, covers home design and trends. Read more of her work here .
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More from Glamour 18 Pretty Celebrity Haircut Ideas to Take to the Salon Fall 2011's Most Wearable Trends 15 Little Signs He Likes You 39 of the Sparkliest Engagement Rings Ever Un-Scary Hair Makeovers to Consider Write the damn letter! "I was pulling another all-nighter as an entry-level analyst at Goldman Sachs when I heard that Willow Bay, someone I'd admired for years, was a new anchor on CNN. I wrote her this crazy fan letter, and as luck would have it, she needed a new assistant. That's how I got my first job in journalism." Prepare, prepare, prepare "One Sunday, Tom Brokaw and I were guests on Meet the Press. I'd been researching all week and brought eight pages of notes. Tom had a single note card, and I remember him joking, 'Oh, look at the women. They prepare.' But when you're working your way up, you have to get to know things well. Insane preparation keeps me calm." Find your sounding board "Prime-time TV is a new level of the spotlight. I'm learning a lot of the good things people say are B.S. -- just like a lot of the bad. You have to tune most of it out. My sisters and my executive producer, Wil Surratt, are my sounding boards." Dude, have a life! "Sometimes when people -- usually men -- came to my old show, Squawk on the Street, they'd brag to my coanchor Mark Haines about how they'd never see their kids. Mark would be like, 'What assholes.' I loved that. You can't lose sight of what matters in life."
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How much money you make isn't nearly as important as how you use it, according to Elizabeth Dunn and Michael Norton, authors of the new book Happy Money. Shell out on friendships They say, once you get to $75,000 a year, a bigger paycheck has no impact on day-to-day bliss. So smile, and follow the proven rules for how to be happy with less money.Video: Summer money-saving travel tipsResearch shows that our best moods often come when we're spending time with family and friends. "Yet when many people are saving up for something major a car, a computer, a TV, whatever one of the first things they'll cut back on is socializing," says Dunn. "They'll say, 'I'd like to go out with you guys Friday night, but I'm saving up.' Putting money away is a very positive goal that correlates to happiness, but when your route limits time with friends, you need to think about whether that's a worthwhile trade-off." BING: RETIREMENT MANAGEMENT Splurge on experiences, not things A decade of research tells us that purchases affect our happiness in ways we don't expect. "Most of us think, Gosh, if I had limitless money, I could buy what I want, and I'd be happy," says Dunn. "But it doesn't work out that way."There's almost no scientific evidence, for example, that buying a home or a newer, nicer one increases joy. In fact, in one study that tracked how spending leads to happiness, researchers found that only one type of purchase had any impact: what they label "leisure," i.e., things like trips, movies, and tickets to sporting events and concerts. Ask yourself: How will I really use it? When we're making a big purchase, we tend to focus on isolated uses for the item. While buying that huge flat-screen and signing up for premium cable, for example, we imagine having friends over to watch the big game, or enjoying movies with the family not the cumulative hours we'll spend in front of it accompanied only by Ben & Jerry.Video: Use laughter to improve your lifeSo Dunn and Norton suggest doing this exercise before making a major purchase: Think about the coming Tuesday. Consider what you'll be doing and how your purchase would affect you on that ordinary day, and then make your decision. Be careful with credit cards… Parting with cash can hurt, literally: Seeing high prices can actually activate regions of the brain associated with real, stub-your-toe-style pain. Credit cards alleviate the "ouch" by letting us consume now and pay later, but this often proves financially dangerous. In one experiment, people buying tickets to a sold-out game offered an average of $28 when bidding with cash but jacked that up to $60 when wielding plastic. In another, researchers asked 30 people to estimate their credit-card expenses before opening their monthly bill, and every single one underestimated by an average of 30 percent. …and pay up front instead Putting time between your moment of enjoyment and what scientists call "the pain of paying" can make you happier with what you've bought. With the purchase in the distant past, goodies bought this way feel deliciously free, like the oh-so-sweet poolside piña coladas on your last all-inclusive vacation. Calculate more than the paycheck "If you're choosing between a job where you're going to be struggling to provide for your family versus one where you'll be living comfortably, salary matters a lot," says Dunn.But otherwise, even several thousand dollars more or less each year doesn't have a dramatic effect. What should you be looking at? Coworkers, for one."Being able to have pleasant conversations that help you think through your ideas and get you more excited about what you're doing that's changing your everyday life in a way that $10,000 spread out over the year probably won't," says Dunn.And on the negative side: commute length. Traveling to and from work is one of the lowest-ranking activities, happiness-wise. The impact is so bad that taking a job that requires an hour-long commute each way has a negative effect on general contentedness just about equal to not having a job at all. Always ask yourself: What will that raise cost me?
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Landlords and tenants often disagree over what qualifies as inevitable wear-and-tear during move-out. Typically, reputable landlords don't hold residents liable for minor wall scratches and scuffed floors. Even so, you can never be sure how reasonable a landlord is until your deposit is safely returned. Each tenant and property manager is different, so we turned to personal finance writers to provide insight on their personal experiences with damage deposits. 1. Do you conduct an initial walk-through before signing a lease? I have taken pictures when doing a walk-through of an apartment. It really has saved me later on when I moved out and the owner claimed I owed money for damage that was already there. If it weren't for me taking these pictures, I would have been responsible for hundreds of dollars' worth of stuff that was not my responsibility. There is no arguing with photographic evidence. Natalie H. I don't recall doing an initial walk-through, only seeing an equivalent apartment beforehand. It was a fairly new complex, so there were no noticeable damages when we moved in, and we didn't damage the property and received our deposits back promptly. Lena Gott 2. In your experience, what are the most common damages you've made or seen in apartments? The most common damages are usually stains to the carpet and screens. I also try to spot clean any stains on the carpet, so we are not charged. We've always been able to get the carpets clean enough before a walk-through to avoid any charges. Remember to agree to in writing who is responsible for cleaning the carpets when you move out. Repairing screens is something you can fix yourself easily and inexpensively before your landlord does a final inspection. Toni Anderson 3. Why do damages sometimes go overlooked? I think it's easy to overlook the damage that occurs when a renter does not keep their home in a clean and organized condition. Some people are much harder on their living space than others, and you never really know whether you'll get someone like that until it's too late. Holly Johnson 4. Any recommendations during move-in or move-out to help secure returned damage deposits? Meet with the landlord on-site during move-in and move-out and get their assessment in writing of any damages they intend to levy. Also, check your local laws carefully to understand your rights. For example, rather than fighting in court with an old landlord over keeping part of my deposit for bogus pre-existing damages, I got them to return my money on the technicality that they didn't give me timely notice of their intent to keep part of the deposit. Wojciech Kulicki 5. Any rental damage horror stories? When we were renting we had a hot water pipe (from baseboard heating) break around a faulty soldering joint. We weren't home, and thousands of dollars' worth of damage was done before we knew about it. The landlord was originally very accommodating but after everything was fixed tried to come after us for "damages" because he said we had something to do with the pipe breaking. Catherine MacLean Related: Why Renters Insurance Is So Important Puppy Love: The Newest Apartment Amenity 6 Ways Renters Can Get the Most for Their Money
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Have you been so busy self-tanning before heading home where you might run into your ex-boyfriend (er, I mean, baking pies and decking halls) that you still haven't made time to holiday shop? I'll spare you the procrastination lecture and instead give you four genius gift ideas that you can pick up on Christmas Eve at CVS… #1: Magazine subscriptions A thoughtful (and easy!) gift.Grab a copy of his favorite one from the drug store newsstand tie it with a ribbon, fill out the no-postage-required subscription card that comes inside the magazine, let him know in the card that he can expect 12 more issues, and you've got an instant great gift. #2: Who doesn't love movie night? Most drug stores have a bin of discount DVDs, so grab a classic (you can't go wrong with anything starring Will Ferrell!), head over to the snack aisle and scoop up a box of microwave popcorn, some Junior Mints, Good 'n Plenty, Milk Duds, and Twizzlers, and wrap it all up with a red ribbon. #3: At-home relaxation kit And finally, with so many people taking "staycation" in favor of "vacation" this season, anyone's bound to appreciate a little at-home relaxation kit. Include a face mask, bath salts, a foot scrub, a few good gossip rags, and a scented candle, and suddenly his week at home will be a total indulgence. #4: Grab tons of accessories Grab a simple wicker basket, a plastic bucket, or any kind of container, and fill it with tons of hair accessories: headbands, elastics, bobby pins, cute combs, and bright colored clips…and then sign her up for Glamour's FREE 10 Days of Glam Hair Ideas. She'll have enough beauty inspiration to keep her going through the cold winter!
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Bridesmaids, tear up the wedding toast draft that recounts your wild college years with the bride, and listen up! We talked to wedding party members, wedding guests, and wedding experts to get the lowdown on what you should and shouldn't say during your speech. Wedding Toast Tip: DO keep it short. "I have to agree with Mark Twain: Brevity really is the soul of wit. If you want to tell the bride or groom about your deep and undying love and respect for them, write them a letter. The reason you speak in front of a crowd is meant to entertain. Short, funny or sweet, and short. That's the way to do it." Kat Thomsen, 31 Wedding Toast Tip: DON'T pass around the microphone. Don't ever let there be an open mic situation make sure the DJ or band knows exactly who is going to speak and when, and don't let him give the mic to anyone who is not authorized to speak. Drunk guests can get very excited about speaking and make an uncomfortable situation spiral out of control." Jeannie Uyanik, Executive Director of event planning service C&G Weddings Wedding Toast Tip: DO maintain the appropriate level of emotion. "Do keep yourself together no one likes a blubbering mess but don't be shy about expressing your emotions toward the bride and groom. The funniest, most touching toasts always come from the heart." Ranya Barrett, 31 Wedding Toast Tip: DON'T talk about the bride's or groom's past hookups. "Back in our early 20s, when our very first friend got married right out of college, we didn't know any better, and 12 girls (our entire group of friends) got up and roasted her. We took it a little too far and told a story about a time when one of her hookups (with another guy) went awry. Our friend was marrying someone seven years older than she, and his group of friends were much more polished than we were. Needless to say, it didn't go over well the crowd was silent while we laughed about our private jokes. They totally didn't get it!" Jen Weinberg, 33 Wedding Toast Tip: DO write it down if necessary. "Don't feel ashamed if you need to read it off of a piece of paper. Chances are guests will remember more what you said, not if you memorized it… When you are nervous, you tend to speed through speeches, and forget things, or sometimes even add more that isn't necessary." Jim Dereka, 23 Wedding Toast Tip: DON'T have more than one drink beforehand. "You want to be relaxed, sure, but there's nothing more embarrassing (for everybody!) than a slurred speech. If you're important enough to the bride and groom to be speaking on their wedding day, it's important enough that you stay sober. I had one glass of wine before I toasted my sister just to calm me down, but anything more would have been too much." Jessica Duncan, 25 Wedding Toast Tip: DO make it personal (but DON'T make it about you!). "Share a couple of heartfelt or funny experiences that you have shared with the happy couple over the years. Guests love to visualize the connection and share a collective chuckle or sigh. But don't go into a long drawn out dissertation on your relationship with them, how you met, or even worse…how they 'were' your best friend but now belong to each other. Nobody wants to sense resentment…Ugh!" Ali Barone, blogger for New York Wedding Maven and event planner for Ali Barone Events Wedding Toast Tip: DO come prepared. "Go in with a script or at least an outline, or it's trouble. A good friend got up at his brother's wedding and said, "I love you guys, God bless" and put the mic down. I have a similar story where a buddy got up, froze, stammered, and then said "Eh, whatever, cheers." Matthew Frank, 32 Wedding Toast Tip: DON'T forget the groom. "Always include both bride and groom in the toast. Some overlook mentioning the other half many times out of nerves." If you're the Maid of Honor and you don't know the groom too well, Thompson recommends saying something like, "I've watched the bride for the past few years and see how happy the groom has made her, and that makes me happy to see her smile." Debra Thompson, owner, Weddings By Debra Wedding Toast Tip: DON'T get raunchy with your humor. "Skip anything sexual. I always cringe when I think about the engagement dinner toast Jason Segel gives to Paul Rudd and Rashida Jones in I Love You Man, in which he alludes to what goes on behind closed doors. I've heard toasts go into some romantic gray area that allude to sexual compatibility, or first night jokes or comments. Even when it's subtle it makes me so uncomfortable." Christina Draper, 31 Wedding Toast Tip: DO make your toast (at least a little bit) sentimental. "The best wedding toasts I've heard always come from the heart no matter what is said. Introduce yourself and explain how you know the bride or groom. Share a funny (not humiliating) story about the couple, or how the bride/groom has changed for the better after meeting the other, or read a poem that expresses your feelings about the marriage. End with wishing the couple well and raise your glass for the toast." Jane E. Wilcox, owner of Forget-Me-Not Events
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The secret's in three little words: Keep a budget! For proof, we asked two Chicago friends with identical salaries $42,500 to track expenses for a week. Leah, 29, set a budget of $300; the other, Sarah, 25, winged it. Behold! By Erin Zammett Ruddy {none} MondayLeahGroceries: $43.52. Note to self: Good cheese is expensive. Got a ride to work.SarahTrains to and from work: $4.50. Needed caffeine, hit 7-Eleven: $2.07. Dinner with friends at BYOB place: $20. {none} TuesdayLeahBus fare: $4.50. Brown-bagged lunch. Friends asked me to a concert, but, budget in mind, I turned them down. Cheap day!SarahTrain fare: $4.50. Coffee: $2.07. Grab soup and salad: $10.25. Whole Foods for dinner: $12. {none} WednesdayLeahGot a ride to work and packed a lunch. Indian takeout for dinner: $22.SarahStreet parking by work: $15. Parking ticket: $50. (Oops.) Sushi: $13.50. Concert: $47.50. Parking: $5. Gas: $43. {none} ThursdayLeahBus to work: $2.25. Shared cab home: $6. Breakfast at home, leftovers for lunch, and a free! company dinner.SarahParking lot: $25. Can't risk another ticket! Egg sammy, coffee: $2.95. Lunch: $10. Cab home from staff dinner: $10.50. {none} FridayLeahBuses to and from work: $4.50. Gas for car: $33. Tapas for a friend's birthday: $75 pricey, but she only turns 30 once!SarahTrain fare: $2.25. Groggy from last night's work party; coffee and greasy breakfast: $7. Lunch: $10. Takeout with BF: $35.70. {none} SaturdayLeahEgg sandwich: $4.50. Groceries for dinner: $15. Comedy show: $22. Cab to house party: $5. House party: $10. Cab home: $6.SarahYoga: $13. Groceries: $27.84. Target: $45.11 went for paper towels; bought a candle and a sweater. Gift for friend: $56.50. {none} SundayLeahBrunch: $16. Tried on a suede jacket. Price tag: $269, a budget buster pass! Sushi dinner: $20.SarahYoga class: $13. Too cold for a run! Drugstore: $9. Needed contact solution but also picked up some hand lotion. {none} TotalLeah$289.27 $10.73 under budget! "I have a new perspective on how to plan for larger-ticket items." LeahSarah$497.24 Way more than she'd intended! "I realize just how much I spend on things I don't need!" SarahThe bottom line: Leah proves that sticking with a budget can help you rein in spending by $10,000 a year. "She shows money mindfulness is so important when you're trying to save," says Carmen Wong Ulrich, Glamour's money expert, who adds that you should aim to sock away at least 10 percent of your take-home income every month. {none} ---
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by Mikki Halpin Yes, you can be happy even in cold, wet, snowy, slushy January! Celebs Eating Junk Food Because it's good to know it happens, isn't it? The Bunnies-in-Cups Video Better than Prozac. The Hot-Guys-Named-Ryan Trifecta Adorable Gosling, Reynolds and Phillippe call them the Ryfecta. Girls With Gaps Anna Paquin, Lara Stone: Thanks for showing that perfection is boring. Bargain Shopping Look, even the stars of Glee believe in deep-discount delight. SNL's Kristen Wiig As Gilly, Suze Orman or Kathie Lee, she keeps us laughing till Tuesday. Chocolate! Good for heartbreak, boredom and everything in between. A-List Curves Christina Hendricks, or any woman who refuses to shrink for Hollywood. More, please! Pretty Boys with Mustaches Is there anything sillier than not-quite-there facial hair? "Modern Family" Because these guys make our families seem sane.
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More from Glamour: 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own 25 Celebrity Hairstyles That Will Make You Want Bangs 10 Beauty Tricks That Make Guys Melt 10 Most Wearable Spring 2014 Fashion Trends The Best Shoes for Spring 2014 13 Sneaky Habits That Can Cause Acne For those of you on official Kate Middleton Outfit Watch, here's the latest. While the Duchess has yet to debut a much-anticipated couture gown , she did go refreshingly sporty-casual and high street out and about in Auckland yesterday. For a visit with military members and their families at Whenuapai Airbase, Kate went preppy nautical in a Zara double-breasted blazer, a Me + Em Breton shirt, J Brand skinny jeans, and her fave wedges from Russell & Bromley. (She wore a similar outfit for a high-profile game of volleyball back in October.) Kate's blazer cost a reasonable $135 (£79.99) and a similar version is available online for $139 (as of this morning anyway). OMG, Wills and Kate went #normcore! Just kidding. The Cambridges then made their way to the Auckland Harbor for a boat race and thus dressed accordingly. Kate even switched out her wedges for a pair of $95 Sebago Bala flats. (Will Kate make boat shoes the new Birkenstock?!) Kate did end up shedding the bulky windbreaker (whew) to unveil her sporty, stripe-y shirt. She then proceeded to own the future King of England in the yacht race beating him across the finish line twice. Boo ya. Do you prefer Kate wearing casual or dressier outfits? Which is your favorite look from the Royal Family tour so far?
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More from Glamour: 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own The Dos and Don'ts of Fall 2012 Fashion Trends What to Wear to Work This Fall 30 September Outfit Ideas 27 Fall Hairstyle Ideas to Consider Break in your heels at home. "The Lincoln Center steps are not the place to face-plant in front of a horde of photographers! Before Fashion Week, I put on thick sweat socks with my new stilettos and wear them around the house to stretch the shoes out while I'm doing the dishes." Tracey Lomrantz Lester Stash all your extras. "I stow my chargers, headphones, camera, and makeup in zip pouches from stores like ASOS and Gap. They keep my purse organized and look superchic!" Megan Gustashaw Consider a hot pad (really!). "Rumor has it that street-style supernova Anna Dello Russo puts athletic heat patches onto the small of her back on chilly Fashion Week days so she can sport skimpy designer duds and still stay toasty." Susan Cernek Apply lipstick like a pro… "Fashion Week days are long up to 18 hours! Here's the backstage secret I learned to make lip color last through it all: First, pat on foundation. Next, a layer of lipstick. Third, dust lips with translucent powder. Finally, put on a second layer of color. Sounds tedious, but I promise you won't have to apply again!" Rachael Wang …and take it off like a pro too. "Makeup artists have access to the most expensive products, but the truth is, backstage, about 90 percent of them use just plain ol' baby wipes to take off the models' makeup from the show before. They're fast and gentle and inexpensive." Beth Shapouri Buy nipple covers (yes, we wrote that). "It sounds weird, but they're essential! I have many outfit changes between shows, and these stick on and give a smooth shape like a T-shirt bra without the straps or hooks. They work with backless, strapless, one-shoulder, plunging, and sheer dresses. Amazing!" Louise Roe
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The presence of a friend while shopping enhances significantly more apprehension than shopping alone, says one psychological study out of the University of Montreal. The presence of a shopping pal, either a friend or a family member, draws the other shopper from his or her routine processes, makes them more cognitively and emotionally alert, which explains the strengthening of the relation with the shopping environment. It also enhances a shopper s apprehension of being evaluated and controlled, scientists say. Conversely, when shoppers are alone, they are more likely to reduce their inhibitions and make impulse purchases and even not to tell the truth about their purchases. Translation: Shopping with a friend will help you curb impulse buys. And if you hit up your favorite department store with a shopping buddy, chances are you ll make more sensible purchase decisions. In your experience, do you think this research holds up? I m a terrible shopper, in general either I know exactly what I want when I walk into a store, or I ll take forever making a decision. But if I shop with a friend, I hardly ever buy anything at all, because I m more focused on the social aspect of hanging out than making a purchase. More from Glamour: 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own 25 Celebrity Hairstyles That Will Make You Want Bangs 11 Dating Don'ts You Should Stop Doing Now 10 Most Wearable Spring 2014 Fashion Trends Dating Tips from Taylor Swift The Best Shoes for Spring 2014
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More from Glamour: 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own 25 Celebrity Hairstyles That Will Make You Want Bangs 10 Beauty Tricks That Make Guys Melt 10 Most Wearable Spring 2014 Fashion Trends The Best Shoes for Spring 2014 11 Dating Don'ts You Should Stop Doing Now Start with this basic packing list, and even if you're not headed to any of the above, these items will prove useful for any spring and summer outing like picnics, beach days, hiking trips, beer garden runs…you name it. And if you are headed out to a fest this season, don't forget to check the official website all the dos and don'ts. Have fun! Cool sunglasses: Pray for sunshine so you can bust out a pair of cool UV-shielding sunnies. (I'm assuming at this point that you know to pack the sunscreen.) A packable floppy hat : Just make sure the rim isn't too big. Don't be that girl who blocks the view from the people behind you. A versatile bathing suit: Bring a bikini that can double as a cute top and appropriate wear for when the water starts spraying around in the mosh pit. A chic poncho: A seasoned festival-goer knows to be prepared for rain. Don't be a sucker and resort to those overpriced plastic-y ponchos that they sell on-site bring your own stylin' hooded one instead. You'll thank yourself later. Rain boots: Obviously, you'll need a pair of waterproof wellies that pair just as well with a cute sundress as it does denim cutoffs, Kate Moss-style. Extra socks: That said, you should be prepared and bring some backup dry socks. The cuter the better. An extra layer: A sweatshirt will come in handy when the scorching sun sets and the desert evenings settle in. Bonus points for a super-cute one. Facial Wipes: Free flowing H20 might not be that available, so bring some gentle wipes, just in case. They also come in handy to clean up any errant mud splatters. A water bottle: Save the planet and bring your own water bottle BPA-free and empty, of course. You can fill up on the festival grounds. A fashionable and functional backpack: It's the best way tote all your essentials and leave you hands free to bust a move, quaff some beverages, and throw some mud around. If you can find one that's Americana-hip, made of lightweight organic cotton, and water-resistant, even better! And even if you're not hitting the festival grounds this season, these items will come in handy for the summer. Which item do you like best? What are you packing for a music festival if you are going?
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Although the Audi Q5 and BMW X3 crossovers have been popular in both the U.S. and Europe, both German automakers are making significant strides in their respective model's chassis architecture and powertrains to meet increasing competition in the compact crossover segment. Our cohorts at Automobile have details on what to expect from the redesigned 2016 Audi Q5 and 2017 BMW X3. 2016 Audi Q5 The 2016 Audi Q5 will move to the new lightweight MLB-evo platform, which Audi says will improve fuel efficiency and handling. Audi will offer the Q5 with a 245-hp 2.0-liter gas turbo or a 190-hp 2.0-liter turbodiesel four-cylinder engine as well as a 272-hp 3.0-liter turbodiesel V-6. There is also talk of a triple-turbo 3.0-liter TDI with 354 hp and 500 lb-ft of torque. The third turbo is said to be an electric compressor for off-the-line power. An Audi Q5 e-tron quattro ultra will use a plug-in hybrid powertrain featuring a 252-hp 2.0-liter turbo I-4 with a 109-hp electric motor. Available features include LED or laser headlights, larger wheels, S-line packages, and matte paint options. Inside, the next Q5 will feature a similar instrument screen as the new Audi TT with steering wheel-mounted Drive Select and an advanced infotainment system. The new Audi Q5 will be built at a new plant in San José Chiapa in Mexico. 2017 BMW X3 Codenamed G01, the third-generation 2017 BMW X3 will use the automaker's new 35up architecture that is said to be more space-efficient and stiffer than the current model's 3 Series-based underpinnings. BMW estimates the next X3 to be around 200 pounds lighter. Global powertrain options will include a pair of more efficient 2.0-liter turbodiesel I-4 engines and a new 3.0-liter turbodiesel I-6. Gas engines will still be offered, and are likely to dominate the range in the U.S. The new engines are said to have more horsepower, low-end torque, and be more fuel-efficient. BMW will also add two high-performance variants to the X3 line . The first is a 360-hp X4 M40i from the M Performance division, while the other gets the full M treatment. That model, the BMW X3 M, will feature a 422-hp version of the new M3's twin-turbo 3.0-liter I-6. A plug-in hybrid consisting of a 240-hp 2.0-liter gas engine and 95-hp electric motor will also be available. Electric-only range is expected to be 25 miles. Interior packaging is said to be improved with a fold-flat second-row seat, while other seats will be slimmer and lighter. BMW will offer lots of available features, including a larger sunroof, LED headlights, and brake and wheel packages as well as X-line and M Sport packages. Head over to Automobile for the full story. Images of current models are shown. Source: Automobile
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More From Conde Nast Traveler: The World's Friendliest Cities What NOT to Do in 7 Travel Destinations The Weirdest Foods in the World Restaurants in Crazy Locations Eerily Beautiful Abandoned Places What Every Smart Traveler Should Do in July Q: I've settled into my flight to New Zealand, a book of Proust on my lap and thoughts of kayaking the Bay of Islands on my mind. I catch the eye of the passenger in the aisle seat, who's pretty cute. All in all, my flight's taking off nicely. Until I feel the consistent rhythm of the toddler behind me, kicking (and kicking and kicking) my chair. Mom and Dad have already raised their hands in surrender. Is there anything I can do to find my happy place again? A: Before you blow a gasket and inform the parents of their poor parenting skills, and grab little Jacob's feet and hold him upside down, take a breath. As a passenger in this age of security theater, the first thing to recognize is that the minute you enter the TSA line at your departure airport until you walk past security at your destination you are operating in what is, in many ways, a police state. Don't make waves. Always stay calm. Sometimes you have to suck it up when someone else is bothering you. That being said, a polite conversation with a flight attendant, who is in a position of authority on the plane, should bring about the desired result. After all, you do have the right to fly without being physically harassed. If, however, you become confrontational with the parents or child, you could find yourself the subject of reprimand or, in a worst-case scenario, restraint. The latter would probably not happen unless you did swing little Jacob by the ankles, but do you really want to test the flight crew's patience? While the kicking will hopefully cease with assistance from the crew, there probably isn't much you can do about the noise in a circumstance like this. Noisy children, or even noisy adults for that matter, won't necessarily quiet down because you ask. Parents and flight attendants may also be less inclined to step in if the issue is only noise, unless it's excessive, but that's subjective. If you find yourself next to someone who feels compelled to broadcast his existence to everyone in the vicinity, perhaps now is a good time to look through SkyMall and purchase a pair of noise-canceling headphones for your next flight. Travelers have stated they work wonders when loud children are nearby. Maybe the larger lesson is: When on an airplane, it's best to fix problems of the moment in the simplest way possible, which doesn't usually involve changing someone else's behavior. So, sit back, listen to your favorite podcast, put Proust back in your bag. Don't think about lost time until you're on the beach and can deal with all those existential ramifications. Otherwise, you might remember you're hurtling through space in a people-packed aluminum tube seven miles above the earth. You don't want to be the one who defines noise as an objective phenomenon, your screams penetrating through coach, business, first, all the way to the cockpit, little Jacob laughing at the crazy person duct taped to the seat.
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More from Glamour: 14 Lies Men Tell Women 30 Sex Tips Every Woman Should Consider 50 Things Men Are Afraid to Ask For (But Really Want) 10 Types of Sex to Try at Least Once in Your Life 35 Truths About Marriage (According to Guys) Guys: Which word best describes your thoughts on babies? Miraculous: 40% Terrifying: 10% Both: 50% So do you ever want to have one? Yes, definitely: 33% Maybe, assuming I find the right girl: 23% Never. Bring on the birth control forever : 13% I already have one (or more): 31% Video: How to be a stay-at-home dad What's scariest about having a baby? The lack of sleep a newborn causes: 7% The actual birth. It's intense!: 9% Parenting I could screw up royally: 33% The financial pressure of raising a kid: 51% Have you picked out names for your future kids? Yes, I've had them chosen for years: 11% Not yet, but I've got a few in mind: 36% This has never occurred to me: 22% Actually, I already have kids: 31% Bing: Most popular baby names What do you most hope your baby will get from you? My athleticism: 7% My looks: 11% My humor: 38% My work ethic: 44% Would you want to be married before having a baby? Yes. It's step one: 60% Not necessarily: 40% Would you marry a woman who didn't want babies? No, it's a deal breaker: 42% Yes, if I were in love: 58% Have you ever lied to a woman by overplaying how much you want kids? Yes: 7% No: 93% Will or do you change your baby's diapers? Yes: 93% No: 7% And we've gotta ask: do guys get as excited as women do about buying baby clothes? Of course! Those little cotton onesies are the cutest things ever: 26% Not a chance. I don't like buying my own clothes, let alone outfits for a baby: 74%
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1. Use Multi-Tasking Products: One very straightforward way to minimize your beauty expenditures is to use fewer products. Fortunately, more and more products are multi-purpose, so they slim our cosmetics cases while they fattens our wallets. Instead of using SPF + moisturizer + anti-aging product + foundation, try a "Beauty Balm" cream or "BB Cream", which is a combination of all four. Our April issue of Good Housekeeping has more information on the different offerings that are out there, or check out my previous post on BB creams where I suggested trying Revision Skincare Intellishade SPF45 Matte and Boscia BB Cream. 2. Try Store Brands: A little while back Click we tested generic brands to see how they compare to some name brands. We found that when it comes to body lotions, consumers like generics just as much as big-name brands. Try making substitutions for other simple products like body wash and facial cleansing wipes. But when it comes to products with specific functions, like reducing wrinkles or getting rid of age spots, you're better off sticking with name brands. Related: 10 Secrets of Super Savers 3.Buy Budget Eye Makeup Remover: I wear eye makeup every day, so I go through eye makeup remover pretty quickly, but I hate constantly shelling out money for it. My mother taught me that any basic face cream swiped on with a Q-tip works just as well and it's a tip I rely on. (It's also a great way to get rid of mid-day eye makeup smudges.) Lately, I've been using store-brand baby shampoo and a washcloth and it really takes everything off, and quickly, too. Since baby shampoos are "tear-free", I don't get any eye irritation. I wet my eye area and a washcloth with running warm water, add a dollop of the baby shampoo to the cloth, and gently rub it back and forth over my closed eyes. Keeping my eyes closed, I rinse with warm water. Viola! My eye makeup's gone and I've saved money and time. 4. Color Your Own Hair: Sure, we all love the way we feels when we leave the salon after having our hair done, but regular visits really add up, especially when it comes to coloring. Luckily for you, we've done rigorous testing at GHRI to identify the best at-home products . You don't have to convert completely: If you really love the pampering you get at the salon, try saving a couple of bucks by using a root touch-up between visits or a demi-permanent color to replace a professional glaze. Related: Beauty Treatments: When to DIY and When to Go Pro 5. Do Your Own Nails: Weekly manicures can make a dent in your budget so try doing your own nails more often. Once you've mastered the process, you'll wonder why you ever spent time and money at the salon. I polish my own nails about 90% of the time now and committing to the task has me almost as skilled as a pro. Last week I decided to "treat" myself to a manicure for the first time in months and found myself antsy sitting in the chair, annoyed at the time it was taking. Afterwards I realized that I could do just as good a job myself. For now, I'll go back to doing my own nails and keep more money in my pocket.
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Put down the striped tie, and check out these 12 fresh, budget-friendly ideas for Dad that are sure to make his Father's Day special. Safety First After all those lectures from Dad on roadside safety, turn the tables on him this Father's Day with a multi-purpose Road Torq Spotlight ($30, momastore.com). A combination-spotlight and emergency beacon in one, it also comes equipped with a folding tripod, so in event of a break-down, he can set it up on the side of the road and signal for help. Long spiel on the dangers of letting your gas tank get too low not included. The Best of Both Worlds Combine two of Dad's favorite things — grilling and power tools — with this Motorized Grill Brush with Steam Cleaning Power ($29.99, brookstone.com). Equipped with a sprayer to steam clean and a motor to power through tough grease and dirt, he'll be sure to appreciate the cool-factor this gadget lends to cookout cleanup. Chill Out Make sure Pop's wine is always the perfect temperature with this rad-looking icicle-shaped cork. Put the frozen Corkcicle ($24.95, corkcicle.com) into a chilled white to keep it chilled on your table for up to an hour, or place it in a room temperature red wine to cool it to cellar temps. The best part? It's reusable! Game Time Gift a football fan this Tim Tebow biography ($16.45, amazon.com), which unveils the unique story of the how the son of Christian missionaries grew up to be one of the sport's most talked about players. Angler's Pick Perfect for a novice or skilled fisherman, the Ultimate Fishing Tool ($24, restorationhardware.com), comes with nine essential features, including a hook remover, serrated knife, bottle opener, scale, and tape measure. Stop and Smell the Hops For the beer aficionado, it doesn't get better than the Beer Tasting Test Kit ($18, uncommongoods.com), which comes with paper sleeves for 18 bottles, cans, or pints; tasting notepads; and a 48-page booklet, all designed to help your dad discover (and remember) his favorite brews. Daring Documentary The Steve Jobs documentary on DVD ($13.46, amazon.com), which explores the trials and triumphs of one of the most controversial geniuses of our time, is sure to delight and inspire Dad. Tooling Around Every handyman in your life will appreciate the addition of a cool tool pen ($5.95 each, mxyplyzyk.com) to his toolbox or garage. Choose from a hammer, screw, screwdriver, or wrench. Off the Cuff Smart and simple, these Kate Spade New York Silver Street Cuff Links ($30, lordandtaylor.com) are the perfect accompaniment to his power suit. Play Ball Vintage illustrations come printed on these limited-edition, regulation-size Unforgettaballs ($25, restorationhardware.com), perfect for the die-hard baseball fan. Scent of a Man Sandalwood, cedar, patchouli, and vanilla are just some of the rustic notes in Old Bourbon Eau de Toilette ($28, westthirdbrand.com), an artisanal fragrance named after Kentucky's Bourbon County. He'll love the unusual and unfussy scent. Put His Best Face Forward Make sure dad keeps his face looking fresh and young with this Clean Skin Scrub ($30, decleorusa.com), a 2-in1 cleanser and exfoliator gel, which moisturizes while softening stubble.
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More from Glamour: 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own 25 Celebrity Hairstyles That Will Make You Want Bangs 11 Dating Don'ts You Should Stop Doing Now 13 Sneaky Habits That Can Cause Acne The 10 Prettiest Hair, Nail and Makeup Looks for Fall 2013 The Best Celeb Haircut for Your Texture Plaid is usually the furthest I'll go with patterns on a daily basis. Sounds boring, I know. But I keep surprising myself with how majorly I'm falling for eccentric prints lately. They were all over the fall runways and have been a permanent fixture on my lust list ever since! It all started with the funky little eyes at Kenzo, adorable hearts at Burberry, major graphics at Peter Pilotto, and autumn-appropriate florals at Givenchy. Now, I'm more ready than ever to incorporate them into my wardrobe. By keeping the silhouettes and shapes simple, they are way easier to wear than you might expect. What could be better than bundling up in a bold print? Check out my top picks for all budgets that will give any outfit an instant boost. Do you dig bold prints? Which is your favorite to wear? Will you be trying this trend?
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More from Glamour: 10 Most Wearable Spring 2014 Fashion Trends 7 Seriously Award Things Overheard in the Nail Salon 10 Beauty Tricks That Make Guys Melt 25 Celebrity Hairstyles That Will Make You Want Bangs 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own 13 Sneaky Habits That Can Cause Acne We've all been there. You invest (key word: "invest") in a pair of shoes and the heel snaps, a strap breaks, or the quality isn't quite up to par and guaranteed returns aren't as common as we'd like them to be. Well, British shoe designer Chris Shellis has an interesting solution for you. Through his Birmingham-based label, the House of Borgezie, Chris created what he claims as the "world's most comfortable stiletto" and if you're not satisfied, don't worry, there's a 1,000 year guarantee. (Yes, one thousand with three zeros.) Now first off, let's discuss the Borgezie Riviera Stainless Steel & Sterling Silver Stiletto, which is fashioned out of the same materials as your finest kitchen cutlery. The purported comfort comes the slope of the shoe, plus silicon liners on the toe strap and rear heel. There's also a patented removable heart-shaped sole, which can be replaced with spares upon wear and tear. And a price tag for these creations? A cool £995 or $1672. Now, Chris does offer that 1,000 year warranty, which is kind of crazy considering the number surpasses well over 10 lifespans and a near-infinite amount of trend cycles. I mean, I know everything comes back into style, but four digits is pretty ambitious. Well, that's because he wants the shoes to be heirlooms. "'They're a good investment," he tells the Daily Mail. "Women could even hand them down to their granddaughters." Hm... I have to say that the stilettos aren't exactly my style, but I appreciate the thought that went into creating a comfortable, durable, and lifetime(s) guaranteed heel.
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There's a bit of good news for the folks at Volkswagen's Chattanooga, Tenn. plant. After months of uncertainty, the automaker has confirmed that its new seven-passenger crossover will be built in Chattanooga, not Mexico. The new crossover will be the second vehicle produced at the plant after the Passat sedan. Expected to go into production by the end of 2016, the midsize crossover, which was previewed at last year's Detroit auto show as the CrossBlue concept, will bring in at least 2000 new jobs along with VW's $900 million investment to prepare the plant. The announcement comes just a few days after the plant announced its partnership with United Auto Workers (UAW) to form the new Local 42 union. The UAW made numerous attempts at unionizing the plant, and getting to this point was far from smooth, with many employees voting against UAW representation. The UAW points out that joining Local 42 is optional. As previously reported, unionizing the plant had long been a point of contention. Some factory workers alleged that they were threatened to unionize or risk losing the chance to produce the new crossover. Bernd Osterloh, Chairman of the Group Works Council of Volkswagen, was a strong advocate for Chattanooga to follow the "works council" model used in VW's German plants, which would in theory allow employees to better work with management. The automaker announced today that Osterloh will join the Board of Directors of Volkswagen Group of America. "I am determined to uphold the interests of Volkswagen employees in Chattanooga," Osterloh said in a statement. "The North American market offers considerable opportunities; in my opinion, these have not been pursued with sufficient consistency in the past. With today's decision to produce the midsize SUV in the USA, we are taking a key step." Volkswagen also announced that Chattanooga will be the new home of its National Research & Development and Planning Center. The center will employ at least 200 new engineers and its primary use will be to study customer feedback and quickly integrate their input into existing and future vehicles. In all, the expansion of Chattanooga is part of VW's plan to sell 800,000 vehicles in the U.S. by 2018. Source: VW
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I've made peace with the fact that this is primarily a city and highway truck. Its bed has been used way more often for moving households (three and counting), shooting photos out of, and toting road-trip luggage (northern Michigan, Memphis, the Hot Rod Power Tour, etc.) than hauling dirt, mulch, or anything grimy (only one mulch run so far). So I'm convinced the padded BedRug was the smartest liner option. And this month I augmented it with an Extang eMAX Tonno to protect nice, clean cargo in foul weather. This vinyl tonneau secures the bed with the tailgate locked, folding open in three panels. It can be secured either with two-thirds open, or with the entire bed exposed, using prop rods and nylon straps to stow vertically behind the cab. It clamps to the truck bed easily in about 20 minutes with simple tools (no drilling), and sells for around $500 if you shop around. With the Tonno snuggly installed, we piled the dog and cage in the back seat, with luggage in the bed, and headed 800 miles south to Memphis for Memorial Day. This truck excels at gliding down an expressway, but I was bummed to notice that a new iPhone 5 refused to play through the USB port. It worked fine via Bluetooth, but still... More troubling on the infotainment front is a very occasional (three times) blacking out of the screen upon restarting the truck. Steering wheel controls still control the system if you can figure it out without seeing it. Nothing restores it but another cold restart. Or two. I asked about it during the first service stop, but of course it was working fine then, and the tech noted that they'd need to keep the car for a day to troubleshoot that problem. Because the dealer is so close by, I figured I'd wait for it to happen again and try to drive it right over. While in Memphis, my dad suggested we check out "the bottoms," an off-roading paradise along the Wolf River. Our tuxedoed Jim looked a wee bit overdressed among the quad-runners and inveterate mudpuppies, but we strode over and through some moderately rough stuff and validated the hardware's warm-weather raison d'etre. Ultimately its width, not ground clearance, prompted us to turn back. Speaking of that first service stop, the maintenance minder suggested it about 100 miles into the Memphis jaunt, so I used the MyGMC app to schedule a visit the day after our return at 9004 miles. Regular customers get free maintenance for 2 years/24,000 miles, after which you'll pay $69 just for the 8.8 quarts of fancy 0w20 oil. Today Jim's headed to the Big Apple, appropriately attired for a theater weekend. More on our long-term GMC Sierra Denali 1500 4WD Crew Cab: Arrival Update 1: Warming up to Big Jim Our Car Service life 10,563 mi Average fuel economy 15.5 mpg CO2 emissions 1.55 lb/mi EPA City/Hwy/Comb Fuel Econ 16/22/18 (gas) 12/16/13 (E85) mpg Energy consumption 217 kW-hr/100mi Unresolved problems None Maintenance cost $0 Normal-wear cost $0
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When she was 52, Nancy A. Smith routinely ran 3 to 6 miles a day and ate a healthy diet. Her cholesterol levels were firmly in the good range and she had excellent blood-pressure readings in the range of 110/68 mm Hg. Seven years later, the Collier resident still runs the same daily distances and follows the same healthy diet. So why has her blood pressure climbed to 160/110, requiring hypertension medication, with her total cholesterol soaring to 250 -- well outside the recommended range and at a level that typically brings a prescription for statin drugs? The common villain for women in their 40s or 50s is that anxiety-ridden change of life known as menopause. Women -- and the men in their lives -- are well aware of the discomforts and challenges it poses, including hot flashes, mood changes and sleep disruptions. "I'‍m an avid runner and have been running for 35 years and had some weight gain around the middle, but my main issue was the hot flashes," Ms. Smith said. "They were horrible -- so bad that they would make me nauseous." But worsening cholesterol and blood pressure posed the major puzzle for her, especially after her doctor told her it was not related to menopause. "The only thing that changed in my life was that I entered menopause," Ms. Smith said. As it turns out, menopause may have been an important factor after all with the jump in her cholesterol and blood pressure. A study led by Samar El Khoudary, who holds a Ph.D. in epidemiology at the University of Pittsburgh Graduate School of Public Health, details an association between lower levels of the sex hormone estradiol and higher concentrations of small cholesterol-carrying lipoproteins that are known to cause the buildup of plaque in the arteries. The study found an association between the lower levels of estradiol and higher concentrations of small and medium-small low-density lipoproteins and small high-density lipoproteins. These proteins carry or coat the cholesterol and other lipids so the fatty substances can be transported through the water-based blood. But those specific types of lipoproteins can enter the lining of arteries and remain there and contribute to plaque formation, which narrows and hardens arteries, reduces blood flow and induces inflammation that can lead to a heart attack. Published online last month in the Journal of Lipid Research, the study results "suggest that sex-hormone oscillation at midlife may increase women'‍s risk of cardiovascular disease." The association between lower sex hormones and unhealthful changes in cholesterol may help explain why women with excellent vital signs can quickly show signs of decline during menopause and eventually develop cardiovascular disease. More than 400,000 women per year die of heart disease in the United States, with women now representing 50.8 percent of all heart-disease deaths, according to the American Heart Association. The study advises women to exercise and eat a healthy diet, as Ms. Smith continues to do, to counteract the effects of worsening cholesterol levels. Previous studies already had documented increases in low-density lipoproteins (LDL), typically described as bad cholesterol, as women proceed through menopause. "We know that cardiovascular disease is the leading cause of death in the United States and worldwide, and cardiovascular disease increases as women transition through menopause," the study said. "The change in sex hormones could be one path to cardiovascular disease." The Pitt research team drew data from the Study of Women'‍s Health Across the Nation (SWAN) on the cholesterol-carrying lipoproteins of 120 women, each at different stages of menopause. SWAN, underway at seven sites including Pitt, has been collecting data since 1994 on the health of women, with a broad-based focus on physical, biological, psychological and social changes they undergo during their middle years. The study website is www.swanstudy.org. While the estradiol study did not track each woman through menopause, it focused on point-in-time data to show cholesterol and hormone levels at different stages of menopause. "We know that the lipid profile is adversely changed in post-menopausal women, with higher cholesterol levels and triglycerides -- higher lipid levels that are bad and lower or unchanged ones that are good," Ms. El Khoudary said. "What we have done is to link it to the carriers of cholesterol and not the cholesterol itself. "Carriers (lipoproteins) have specific characteristics. Good cholesterol involves high-density lipoproteins that carry away cholesterol from the arteries to prevent buildup in the arteries. The low-density lipoproteins are the main source of cholesterol and blockage in the arteries. What matters are the characteristics of the lipoproteins, which affect what they carry." Such changes in lipoproteins in women during and after menopause have been a hidden factor in health, in part because conventional cholesterol testing does not measure lipoprotein particle concentration or size. For that reason, conventional characterizations of LDL and high-density lipoproteins (HDL) as good vs. bad cholesterol do not tell the full story about a woman'‍s likelihood of developing cardiovascular disease. "As a woman transitions to menopause, many biological changes take place that can put her at greater risk of many conditions, including osteoporosis and heart disease, " Ms. El Khoudary said. "Our most recent study underscores the importance of having clinicians aware of these risk factors and prepared to work with their patient to help her to mitigate these risks." The National Institutes of Health funded the research. Ms. El Khoudary said her team hopes next to follow a larger group of women through menopause to better understand how declining hormone levels negatively affect or serve as a biomarker of changing lipoprotein characteristics, among other factors that can lead to cardiovascular disease. "We want to highlight this because at a future time an independent study is needed to evaluate the change in the level of hormones'‍ association with the change in the quality of cholesterol carriers," Ms. El Khoudary said. "The main message here is that we really care about knowledge and action. We want to say goodbye to the No. 1 cause of death for women," she said. "Eating a healthy diet and including exercise into the routine can give an edge in the fight against heart disease, and being aware of risk and prevention will help women prepare for a long, healthy life." Nanette Santoro, a professor of obstetrics and gynecology at the University of Colorado School of Medicine, said she reviewed the study and it sheds "new light on the conundrum of lipid and lipoprotein changes across menopause." Ms. Smith, a psychotherapist with a private practice in Bridgeville, also developed the autoimmune disorder Sjogren'‍s syndrome during her years of menopause. It causes dry mouth and eyes. Menopause has been such an ordeal that it might seem that a psychotherapist is necessary to help a woman withstand its effects. But as bad as menopause can be, she said, high cholesterol and blood pressure now pose the latest health challenges she must face, especially now that she has gone a full year without significant menopausal symptoms. "I don'‍t want to develop heart disease," Ms. Smith said. "If I can'‍t manage it myself, what kind of role model am I? I must practice what I preach." For an online publication about menopause from the National Institute on Aging, see http://www.nia.nih.gov/health/publication/menopause-time-change/introduction .
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Your cable and phone bills True story: I just cut my cell phone bill by $100 a month! Which got me thinking about how we can all pay less for everyday expenses. Let's start with phone and cable: Check out billshrink.com and lowermybills.com to see what other companies are charging. Then call your provider, ask for the "customer retention" department (it's their job to keep your business), and request a lower rate. Don't be too aggressive; never bark that you deserve, say, free HBO. Instead try: "Do you have any offers or promotions?" and you may get your True Blood fix gratis. The interest rate on your credit card If you're one of those savvy girls who never carry a balance, bravo! If not, listen up. The average yearly interest rate fluctuates, and it recently jumped from 11 percent to hover around 14. But you may be eligible for a lower one if you have great credit. Find out what the competition is offering at sites like low cards.com and bankrate.com, then call your issuer and suggest you'll be transferring your balance. They should play ball. Just beware: Some companies offer "interest rebates," refunding you a portion of the interest charges for the month if you meet a monthly spending minimum. But those offers could entice you to spend more. Stick to low-fixed-rate cards, and say no to gimmicks. A new car Sad truth: We'll arm-wrestle over a Theory skirt at a sample sale, but sit us down with a car salesman and it's "um, well, er, OK." C'mon, ladies! If dealerships intimidate you, just take your haggling online: Sites like kbb.com and autotrader.com let you e-mail dealers directly for a quote so you can get them to compete for your business. But you don't have to borrow where you buy shop around for your loan, too (try eloan.com or a credit union), and steer clear of dealers who mark up interest rates, especially if you have good credit. If you can't get a set of wheels that you and your wallet love, keep looking. There are plenty of cars on the lot! Furniture and appliances I know, I know, you need that espresso machine. So get it cheap! The best place to start haggling is at the store: Floor models get bumped around, sat on and fiddled with, and are often marked down as much as 20 percent. Top that discount with models that are on sale already, and you could get a costly item for about half its original price. The best months to shop are July, early August and January, when retailers need to make room for new merchandise. Just be sure your big prize still comes with a warranty. An airline upgrade This can be a toughie if you're not a frequent flier, as airlines are running closer to capacity these days, but upgrades still happen. You have a better chance for a free upgrade if you're flying solo or if you casually drop that you're traveling for a wedding (only if you are , of course). If a flight is oversold, as they often are during the holidays, you can offer to take a later one in exchange for a plush seat and extra legroom. Smile at the gate attendant the most underused bargaining trick! Charm your fellow passengers, too. My girlfriend got upgraded by chatting up the guy sitting next to her at the gate. He was an un-uniformed flight attendant! Your doctor's bill Believe it or not, you can bargain with your doc many have pay scales that vary depending on a patient's insurance coverage. Find the going rates for common procedures and exams at outofpocket.com, and ask what your options are when making your appointment. Offering to pay in cash will net you the best discount, but if it's a big bill and you plan to fork over your credit card, request an itemized invoice by mail instead of paying on the spot then comb it for errors. As for therapy, if you're going out of network and the cost is a hardship, your shrink may shrink her usual fee if asked, and you could walk out of there happy emotionally and financially. Carmen Wong Ulrich is a personal finance expert and the author of Generation Debt: Take Control of Your Money.
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1. Your birthday is today. Your boyfriend calls from work to say he's on his way to a baseball game. You say: a. "No, sir. You are on your way over here with a thoughtful present and a dinner reservation, or you are not on your way over here again, ever." b. "Oh, really? Because it's my birthday, and usually on one's birthday one's boyfriend is en route not to a baseball game but to a flower store. But hey, I forget things too. Actually, I don't forget birthdays anymore because of Facebook, but whatever. Have fun. And maybe later you can cuddle with the Marlins." c. Nothing. Maybe he'll remember later. Or not. Really, it's fine. 2. You just did the most brilliant work thing ever done at your job. "Congratulations!" says your boss. You say: a. "Thanks! I worked hard, and it really paid off. I feel fantastic!" b. "Thanks! But Amy, Ben, Sally, Jake and Ryan all really helped make it happen. And I couldn't have done it without my interns. And the guy who brings us coffee. And this pen." c. Mumble mumble. "It was nothing, sir." Mumble mumble. 3. You have to run to the store for milk. You put on: a. Red lipstick, sunglasses and a vintage wrapdress. b. A button-down and jeans and maybe some lip gloss. c. Who cares? If pajamas are good enough for the house, they're good enough for the Safeway parking lot. 4. You arrive at a party and you know almost no one. What do you do? a. Mingle! Play party games! Leave with five guys' phone numbers, a job offer and a new best friend. b. Have a drink, gossip with your one friend and then take off. c. Leave promptly. Do not pass go, do not eat an hors d'oeuvre. 5. It's between you and a work pal for a promotion. You want the job, but she's your friend. What do you do? a. Say, "May the best man win!" And by "best man," you mean you, and by "win," you mean amaze the boss with a PowerPoint presentation enumerating the great work you've been doing. b. See if you and your friend can be comanagers. c. Bow out of the running. You wouldn't want to do anything to make her mad. 6. Where do you see yourself in five years? a. Onstage, accepting an award, married to Ryan Gosling. OK, maybe not Ryan. But definitely wearing some kind of ridiculously expensive Rodarte dress. b. Doing pretty much the same thing as today, but making more money and further along career- and relationship-wise. c. The future is now. And to be honest, it reminds you of a crummy movie on TBS. So how'd you do? If you had mostly A's , you're a star, baby, and you know it! Just don't be too demanding -- nobody likes a diva. Most of us, however, land in the B or C range, meaning we need to up our wattage a little, or a lot. "So many women consider themselves second-class citizens," laments Alice Domar, Ph.D., assistant professor at Harvard Medical School. "It's crucial to prioritize yourself. When you do, people respect you. You get further in your career. Your relationships improve." So how does a regular gal get that celeb swagger? Glamour's got your plan. Just don't forget to mention us in your acceptance speech. Assemble your entourage Drew Barrymore is famous for not going anywhere without a girlfriend on each arm. Lady Gaga reportedly brought a gang of 80 to a British talk show appearance. Eva Longoria lives with her friends. "We always say my house is the female Entourage," she's said of the arrangement. "I don't know what I would do without them." A support network is crucial in bad times and good, says Domar. "These are people who aren't competing with you," she says. "They believe in you and encourage you -- and they point out when you're messing up." If your girls go sour when they hear of your successes, take a cue from Theresa O'Rourke, a writer from New York City: "I grew up in a blue-collar world, and when I became a professional, I would see good friends from the neighborhood and they'd say things like 'Oh, look, it's the big writer,'" says O'Rourke, 37. "They weren't happy for me. I realized I had to steer clear of them." You want a crew that wants for you what you want for yourself and is happy to help you get it. And the man in your life? He should want those things for you too. Treat yourself like an A-lister Celebs make detailed demands in their contracts for the comforts they want in their trailers or dressing rooms. Andrew Goldberg of thesmokinggun.com, which has posted more than 300 of these contract riders, says while some requests are outrageous, like a certain R&B queen's insistence on a new toilet seat wherever she goes (cough, Mary J. Blige, cough), "the common theme is comfort." And if J.Lo requires white flowers, white furniture and white curtains for a cameo in a charity video, you can be a bit more high-maintenance too, says Domar. "What do you need to keep you happy throughout your day?" she says. "Start with your favorite brand of water, lipstick, hand cream, then add more indulgent things." Maybe you scrape together the cash for a maid or splurge on that $150 pillow you've been dreaming about. The point here: Don't settle. Keep your eye on your Oscar We all know the story: A starlet known for slick commercial flicks takes an unglam indie role and winds up with -- wow, how did that happen? -- an Academy Award and a reputation as a serious actress. (See: Charlize Theron in Monster, Halle Berry in Monster's Ball. Shall we go on?) This risky move isn't just for celebs: Lisa Broock left a juggernaut career in PR at ABC television to start at a more junior position in the news department for 25 percent less pay! "Best decision I ever made," says Broock, now 39 and managing editor at Us Weekly magazine. "I earned less, but I spent less because I loved what I was doing." Maybe you don't need a major switch to find your bliss, but you do need to lift your head up from your desk now and then and think about your end game. "Ask yourself, Am I on track with my long-term goals? What are they?" says Maggie Craddock, a career coach. "If you don't, you could wake up and realize your career's gone by" -- and you've played the kooky cubemate, rather than the hotshot in the corner office. Hire a publicist Ever read the story about Kate Winslet rescuing a 90-year-old woman from a burning building? Sure you have, because she, like all stars, has a publicist who's paid not only to keep bad news out of the papers but true stories of good deeds in. We all could use a booster, someone to talk us up to others in a way that would sound conceited coming from our own mouth -- whether to a professional contact or the cute guy at the end of the bar. "I bring my sister to events because she's free PR," says Cheree Berry, 34, a stationer based in St. Louis. "She'll introduce me: 'This is Cheree. She designed all the paper for Chelsea Clinton's wedding!' It's been good for business." So for work events and nights on the town, bring along your personal PR wingwoman to get you the positive attention you deserve. Be a little full of yourself Ever find yourself at the bottom of your own to-do list? "Women are very likely to meet the needs of friends and family, and then, if there's time, take care of ourselves," says Domar. For celebs, not an issue. Why? Because no matter how many babies they've adopted or all-night premiere parties they grace, they know that if they show up on set haggard and unfocused, the work suffers. So the smart ones get their eight hours, eat healthy and work out religiously. "Yes, celebs want to look toned and lean on camera, but they also work out for themselves," says Domar. "They know that exercise is the single best stress reducer we have." They have trainers to keep them honest, but the buddy system works just as well and adds an endorphin boost from bonding, Domar says. "Social support is the second best thing for stress," she says. However you do it, the point is this: Put your own needs first, so when life calls for a flawless performance, you'll be ready. More from Glamour: 18 Pretty Celebrity Haircut Ideas to Take to the Salon Fall 2011 s Most Wearable Trends 15 Little Signs He Likes You 39 of the Sparkliest Engagement Rings Ever Un-Scary Hair Makeovers to Consider
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It's a secret of adulthood: Nothing is more exhausting than a task you never start. I've known this for a long time, but nevertheless had managed to accumulate a lengthy list of small, mildly unpleasant tasks that I kept putting off for months, sometimes years. Granted, these projects weren't urgent (which was why they didn't get done), but they weighed on me, made me feel overwhelmed, filled my brain with I need to… and Don't forget…! I had to fix the problem, because it was making me crazy. I decided to come up with a habit that would help me cross those items off my list. But what? How could a single habit cover a bunch of nonrecurring, unrelated to-do's? Then I hit upon an idea. Once a week, for one hour, I'd steadily work on nagging chores. An hour felt like enough time to get stuff done, but not too long. During this hour, I'd tackle only tasks with no deadline, no accountability, and no pressure because these were the things I kept ignoring. That's another Secret of Adulthood: A chore that can be done anytime is often done at no time. I considered calling my new idea my "To-Do List Time." Then I remembered a term from psychology, the "fluency heuristic," which means that an idea seems more valuable if it's easy to say. For instance, "Haste makes waste" is more compelling than "Hurrying leads to errors." With that in mind, I named my new habit "Power Hour." I started by making a list of tasks. That was almost fun, because I get a weird satisfaction from adding items to my to-do list. I couldn't use my Power Hour for planning my daughter's birthday party or for buying plane tickets (for some reason, I loathe buying plane tickets) because those chores have deadlines so I'd ultimately get to them, like it or not. And I couldn't use my Power Hour for paying bills or for answering e-mails, because I'd developed different habits to get repetitive chores done. Power Hour was my chance to tackle one-time tasks that were sapping my energy and that I could easily postpone indefinitely. A few things on my list: 1. Make a photo album of our summer vacation 2. Use up store credits 3. Donate books to Housing Works 4. Move daughter's pretend kitchen 5. Round up and recycle batteries and devices I decided to ignore all of those for my first Power Hour and tackle my long-neglected paper shredder problem instead. When I bought a shredder, it broke right away, which was discouraging. I got a replacement, but then I let it sit in the corner for months. I couldn't face reading the directions or figuring out how to plug it into the inaccessible wall socket. In the meantime, I'd collected a gigantic pile of mail to be shredded. The unused shredder bugged me, the pile of mail bugged me, and the trivial matter of when I'd finally get around to shredding the stuff was taking up way too much room in my head. Power Hour, I thought grimly that first Saturday afternoon. I sat on the floor, figured out how to plug in the shredder, and it actually worked. Not so bad after all. "Hey, Eliza! Want to help me shred?" I called to my daughter. She came running. "Yes! I love shredding!" By the end of the hour, we had a garbage bag full of scraps. The next day, when something shred-worthy came in the mail, I marched straight to the shredder and got rid of it right away. Victory! People often overestimate what they can accomplish in the short term (in an afternoon or a week), and under estimate what they can accomplish over the long term if they work consistently. But the more experienced with Power Hour I got, the more I noticed that tasks usually didn't take as long as I'd expected them to. For example, I wrote an e-mail I'd been putting off for six months because it required me to describe a complicated change to my website. As it turned out, I whipped it off in 45 seconds. Usually, I stick with one task per Power Hour. If I'm not done after an hour, I stop and continue the next week. But writing that dreaded e-mail happened so fast, I did another. Hitting Send gave me a surge of energy and cheer completely disproportionate to the accomplishment, but it felt so good to cross it off my list. A friend once told me, "I finally cleared out my fridge, and now I feel like I can switch careers." I knew what she meant. I was the only one who cared that I'd finally donated my daughters' outgrown clothes, but that didn't matter: Doing those things made a difference to me. My friends like the idea, too. Recently, I helped one clear her closet (a Power Hour for her). She was so thrilled with the results that when she had a dinner party a few weeks later, she led her guests into the bedroom to admire the glorious organization. An hour a week is a small price to pay for that kind of satisfaction, don't you think? Gretchen Rubin is the author of The Happiness Project and Happier at Home . Follow her at happiness-project.com. More from Good Housekeeping How To Simplify Your Morning Routine Go-To Happy Tricks That Always Work How To Break Your 7 Worst Habits Little Ways To Improve Your Life 10 Ways To Free Up An Hour Of Your Day What You Need To Stop Stressing About
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Lighten your load . A bunch of junk in your car's trunk can really weigh you down, causing your car to be less fuel-efficient. For every 100 pounds of cargo, MPG is reduced up to 2% — that's like paying an additional 7 cents per gallon, based on the national average gas price of $3.65. In addition, anything strapped to the roof creates drag, which means your car has to work harder to maintain speeds, reducing fuel economy by up to 5% (and adding up to 18 cents per gallon to the tab). If at all possible, pack your stuff inside. Plan your fuel breaks before you run low . Convenient right-off-the-highway rest stops are often a huge rip-off. Use mapquest.com to find gas stations and prices (as well as food and lodging) along your route before you leave home. On a search of New York to Boston, I found per-gallon prices of $3.60 and $4.30 for regular unleaded just 20 miles apart (and surprisingly, the cheaper gas was within the city limits, not in the 'burbs). In a pinch, AAA TripTik's free smartphone app (for iPhone or Android) locates the closest stations and their prices so you can choose the least of the evils — just be sure to have a passenger do the searching, or pull over first. Don't let stop-and-go run up your gas bill . Avoiding the daytime rush by leaving early in the morning or later at night can save you money (not to mention, aggravation). Idling — which, in really bad traffic, is basically what you're doing — can burn a quarter to a half gallon of gas an hour ($0.91 to $1.82 for going nowhere fast). But don't speed on those open roads in the wee hours. At high speeds, cars generally burn gas less efficiently. For every five miles per hour over 60 MPH you drive, you could be adding an extra 30 cents per gallon of gas (not to mention the cost of a ticket — an average $150 — if you get caught). Set your cruise control, especially if you tend to have a heavy foot. Another idea: Check to see if your GPS unit offers an "eco" or "green" routing option — they favor slightly slower roads (less than 65 MPH) and ones that have fewer stops. Such a route may also help you avoid traffic by taking you off the more commonly used highways. A real gas saver in the long run: investing in a fuel-efficient car. Check out our reviews of the latest hybrid and electric cars. More from Good Housekeeping 125 Money-Saving Tips 30 Best Beauty Buys Under $10 5 Best Haircuts of All Time Our Best Bedroom Decorating Ideas 52 Home-Organizing Tips 25 Ways to Clean Out the Clutter
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Breakfast in bed and store-bought carnations are nice. But if you're looking for something that'll last a little longer this year, direct your family to these sweet (and inexpensive!) Mother's Day gifts. You can find great ideas to spoil your mom, too. Pitching In The 10-inch tall Lasting Impression White-washed Pitcher ($25, Target) can tackle big bouquets or brunch beverages. Either way, it's a beautiful addition to your table. Scent-sational A classic scent is the perfect pick-me-up. We like the Philosophy Amazing Grace Mother’s Day Fragrance Layering Collection ($47.50, philosophy.com), which includes a spray fragrance, scented body butter, and a summery shade of nail polish. Tea Service You'll take entertaining to new heights with Cost Plus World Market's tastefully tropical Rio Tea for Two set ($25, worldmarket.com). Sized for sharing, the stackable porcelain pot holds three steaming cupfuls. Ring Me Up The only thing that could be better than bling? Jewels with loving sentiments behind them, of course! Wearing Crescent Moon Stacking Birthstone Rings (pictured: sterling silver rings with citrine, blue topaz and iolite stones, $48 each, Luna & Stella) would be a lovely way to represent each of your children. Mamma Mia Frances Mayes’ novel Under the Tuscan Sun was a New York Times bestseller, and it inspired the 2003 eponymous movie with Diane Lane. Now, Mayes is sharing recipes from her beloved memoirs in The Tuscan Sun Cookbook ($30, amazon.com). Whether you’re an Italian momma, or simply love to cook like one, your family will adore these dishes almost as much as they do you. Hugs and Kisses Real hugs and kisses are the best Mother’s Day present of all, but this sterling silver Blue Nile Mini XO Necklace ($41, bluenile.com) will be a sweet reminder of your family’s love when you’re on the go. Picture This Shimmering shards of randomly spaced cerulean and green glass give this Aqua Blue Mosaic Frame ($12, pier1.com) the look of a handmade treasure. It's perfect for showcasing your favorite family portrait. Sweet Tweet Mother’s Day means that summer is just around the corner, so a gift that you can enjoy outdoors is apropos. The Birdscapes Copper Meadow Bird Feeder ($24.50, birdfeeders.com) is both a functional fixture for your feathered friends, and a charming accent for your garden. Mug Shot Attention working moms: Forget displaying cherished photos in ordinary picture frames at the office. This 15 oz. porcelain Photo Collage Mug ($16.99, snapfish.com) is the ultimate brag book. All your loved ones have to do is upload digital photos to snapfish.com, customize a photo collage, and check out! Sow Cute The bold blooms on this metal hand cultivator, pruner, and trowel in Target Home's Tool Set in Floral ($20 for a set, target.com) are a vibrant visual incentive to get out and garden. Spa Station Parenting can wreak havoc on your hands and feet — building science projects, stepping on Legos. Luckily, this Burt’s Bees Head To Toe Kit ($13, burtsbees.com) includes hand salve, foot lotion, and everything else you need for a luxe afternoon of beauty at a bargain price.
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Having trouble shopping for a picky teenager? These great gifts are sure to up your cool factor. Kid-Made Modern Flashy Light Kit Your craft-loving tween will have a blast adding a personal touch to her room with the DIY hanging lantern from Target's new Kid-Made Modern line ($17.99, target.com), available October 21. Everything she'll need is included to make this a great personalized gift or fancy new decoration. HMDX Wireless Portable Jam Speakers Your music-obsessed teen will love rocking out to his favorite tunes with these portable Jam speakers from HMDX ($39.99, amazon.com). In six fun colors, these speakers can wirelessly play music from a smartphone, tablet, or laptop. Philosophy Holiday Kisses Lip Shine The Holiday Kisses Lip Shine box set ($25, philosophy.com) comes with four scents she'll love. In red velvet, frosted cookie, bubbly, and candy cane, these glosses promise to hydrate and soften lips chapped lips while providing a sheer shine. ThinkGeek iCade Turn his iPod gaming experience into arcade-level fun with ThinkGeek's iCade ($99.99, amazon.com). Just connect any device and see game play blown up on the big screen. An old-school joystick and button controls hearken back to the days of Atari games. e.l.f. 14-Piece Nail Cube Your teen will never want for nail colors again with the 14-piece Nail Cube from e.l.f. ($10, eyeslipsface.com). With a wide variety of festive and chic shades to choose from, she can try a new hue for every day of the week. Dakine EQ Bag 23L With the EQ bag from Dakine ($36, dakine.com) your teen can tote around all of his after-school gear in style. This duffle, as well as the girl’s version, comes with a detachable shoulder strap and is made from 100% recycled fabric. Twig Bobby Pins Quirky is in, and your teen will be right on trend with these offbeat Twig Bobby Pins ($21, WoodlandBelle.etsy.com). In gold, bronze, and silver shades, these Etsy accessories will add a touch of whimsy to any ensemble. Da Vinci's Wood Catapult Kit Encourage a budding scientist with this kit ($19.99, thinkgeek.com or amazon.com), which comes with everything you need to build a catapult based on Da Vinci’s blueprints. Heads up: Once it’s built, this catapult can launch items over 14 feet! Mele & Co. Plush Fabric Fashion Jewelry Box Your teen will adore this colorful jewelry box from Mele & Co. ($19.95, hsn.com), with tons of room to fit all of her rings, bracelets, and necklaces. Complete with a mirror and snap closure to keep anything from falling out, this jewelry box comes in festive red, pink, light blue, and black and is available from HSN. SRS Labs iWow 3D Got a budding audiophile on your hands? He'll be majorly impressed by how much SRS Labs' iWow 3D ($60, amazon.com) boosts the audio on his favorite device. Benefit Glam Kit She'll love getting glam (without blowing the holiday shopping budget) with this great cosmetic set. Benefit's Glam kit features seven of the brand's greatest hits ($36, amazon.com). Claire's Mustache Mug Mustaches are all the rage, and this cup ($8.50, claires.com) will help your tween mix a little irony into her hot beverage. At less than $10, it won't break the bank if she wants to pick up matching mugs for her friends. Sonia Kashuk Brush Couture Five-Piece Brush Set She'll feel like a professional, applying makeup with the Couture Brush Set from Sonia Kashuk ($14.99, target.com). This inexpensive package includes five brushes in a variety of sizes with preppy-chic red and purple plaid handles. Goldfish Slippers She'll love lazing around the house in these adorable homemade slippers from Etsy ($40, etsy.com). They're made of wool to keep her toes extra toasty. Dakine Dora Socks She'll love keeping her feet warm in these super-cute snowflake socks from Dakine ($20, dakine.com). This comfortable pair will keep her feet dry on the slopes or just playing around the backyard.
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More from Good Housekeeping 52 Home Organizing Tips 25 Ways to Clean Up and Clear Out Clutter 50+ Bedroom Decorating Ideas Organizing and Decorating Kids' Rooms The 30-Minute Clutter Solution “We will not be undersold!” It’s a refrain you may have noticed on store circulars as you peruse them on a Sunday morning. But what does it really mean — and how do you get the best deal? Here, some insights into price-match guarantees from Daniel Butler, Vice President of Retail Operations for the National Retail Federation. Many major retailers have price-match policies in place. Stores like Walmart, Target, Kohl’s, Best Buy, Staples do it as a matter of practice, and Sears and Home Depot even offer a discount plus 10% off. However, they all have their own rules as to what they require in order for you to get the adjustment. Generally, the policies state that you must show the competitor’s ad and the identical item must still be in stock there (they’ll call to verify). Stores typically won’t match closeout prices, special timed events (like Black Friday deals), or bundled sales (say, buy one, get one free). Even retailers that don’t may still offer you a break. Butler, who worked as a retail store manager for 26 years, would often agree to a price adjustment even though the store for which he worked didn’t have an official policy. “A store manage may do it quietly — they want to accommodate customers where they can and keep them loyal,” Butler says. The type of purchase may matter. It’s more likely that you’ll get a cut on electronics or appliances than on clothing or soft goods (and also, frankly, more worth your while). The simplest reason: It’s much easier to prove that an item sold is identical if there’s a model number to compare. Also, these large-ticket items represent a bigger purchase for a retailer, who of course wants to keep you happy to gain your return business. You can also try your luck on mattresses, says Butler, but these can be harder to compare because the manufacturers will often subtly tweak the same mattress style to sell it under a different name and model number. Mind your timing. Most retailers will refund you the difference if an item goes on sale — at their own store or at a competitor — within seven to 10 days of your purchase. (Though be sure to consult the individual store's policy, as many are running the promotion through the holidays.) Any longer than that and you may be offered a store credit . . . or nothing at all. A trick if you haven’t yet used the item and it’s within the store’s regular return window: Purchase the sale item and return the one you bought. It’s harder to get a discount online. Most brick-and-mortar stores won’t honor online prices even if they have an official price-match policy. Web-only retailers don’t have the same overhead as ones that have physical stores, the latter of whom often sets prices against what the local market can support. Further, e-tailer-to-e-tailer price matches are also rare (though a few sites, such as endless.com, have a policy to do it) — more commonly, these sites offer different types of promotions (free shipping or a percent off if you spend a certain amount) as their way to stay competitive. Let technology do (some of) the work for you. Try a shopping website such as pricegrabber.com (which also has a smartphone app) and Milo.com (which specializes in local shopping results) that allow you to set price alerts on specific items and will contact you if a price drops. Finally, it can never hurt to ask the store manager, or rattle off a polite e-mail to a web store’s customer service. What do you have to lose? What techniques have worked for you? Share them in the comments.
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More from Glamour: The Best Shoes for Spring 2014 10 Wardrobe Essentials Every Woman Should Own 25 Celebrity Hairstyles That Will Make You Want Bangs 50 Wedding Dresses That Will Make Your Heart Skip a Beat 10 Most Wearable Spring 2014 Fashion Trends 10 Beauty Tricks That Make Guys Melt Knee socks always make me think of Cher in the seminal '90s classic Clueless . But considering that the elongated way to wear socks is making a strong return this spring, I may have another reference point come summer. Now before you hit the "back" button or close out this tab, please at least look at the different ways to wear the '90s-redux look similar to my study of the divisive mom jeans trend. Then let's discuss! Borrowed From the Boys: Earlier this week, Taylor Swift took another paparazzi-stalked walk around New York City in a menswear-inspired knee socks outfit. She accessorized her banker blue button down and scalloped edged shorts outfit with a pair of high heel brogues and what dudes refer to as "dress socks." Girls go raid your guy's sock drawer now! (Hopefully your man switches out his socks more often than his underwear .) The Racier OTK: Right before she dyed her hair back to all black, Katy Perry made an appearance in over-the-knee socks layered under a pair of platform sandals. While OTK socks can be more intimidating to pull off (cutting off circulation in the femoral artery, for one), they do make for an edgier, sexier version of the trend. The Sporty-Chic Look: Off duty model Ming Xi paired athletic striped socks with her sneakers. (I actually see this look quite a lot in Brooklyn and not on the soccer fields.) It's somewhat literal, but hey, totally comfortable especially in tricky spring weather. So what's the verdict? Are you into knee socks for spring? Which of these looks do you like best? And most important question: Will you wear them?
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More from Bon Appetit How to Feed Starving Kids a Good Dinner in About an Hour 16 Recipes to Use Up Leftovers, Clean Out Your Fridge A Real Mom's 13 Shortcuts to Feeding Her Family Well 22 Recipes Everyone Should Know How to Cook 6 Common Mistakes People Make when Baking Brownies The Chuck E. Cheese Survival Guide for Adults We're not so good at doing nothing. Take this morning, for example. Here we were, the first Sunday in weeks with not a birthday party, soccer tournament, or home-improvement project in sight. It was the kind of lazy day made for sleeping in and reorganizing the sock drawer. But as soon as the coffeepot had been cleaned, we were already getting antsy. "Put your shoes on, we're going out." Kids: "Where?" "Just trust us." By now they know the routine. We are not make-it-up-as-we-go kind of people at least not when there are kids in the mix. It's not just Sundays at home, though. It's also on vacation, where we are convinced that the key to successful family travel like most things involving young children is to have some structure. Some kind of plan. A three-point plan, to be exact. STEP ONE: A Culture Hit We like to start early(ish), while the energy is high, with the kind of activity that a parent might call "culturally enriching" and a kid might call "the most boring thing ever invented by anyone, ever." The small museum works well here because (1) unlike, say, the Tate in London and we say this with all respect you don't feel as though you've been mugged when you're done, and (2) small museums have awesome gift shops, and kids love a gift shop. (Note: We define "culture" broadly. The Civil War battlefield at Antietam: yes. Hunting for "authentic" Messi jerseys in the Ladies' Market in Hong Kong: possibly yes. The kids' section at Book Passage in San Francisco: absofrigginlutely.) STEP TWO: Something Outdoorsy One of our friends grew up in a crazily athletic family that vacationed in Maine and would have races every morning the entire family swimming out to some distant rock and back. We're not that intense, but we do believe in the value of fresh air, whether it's a 20-minute walk from our hotel to the farmers' market or a sweaty hike through the slot canyons at Tent Rocks in New Mexico. It lifts the general mood, we find, giving us a little of the exhilaration that comes from being outside and seeing something beautiful and being reminded that the world is a lot larger than we thought. STEP THREE: The Reward Whether it's lunch at a divey Mission taco stand or an absurdly priced macaron at Dalloyau in Paris, we always aim to impart to our kids a cardinal rule of travel: The best way to feel you're part of a place is to find something delicious, and to eat it.
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