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what's heavier, a pound of rocks, or a pound of feathers?
there both one pound
you are awoken at 3 a. m. by a knock on your door. your parents call you to let you know that they are there for breakfast. you are confused but quickly think of what food you have. you have bread, jam, butter, and eggs. what do you open first?
door for your parents
dr. garrison has told all the towns people that he will get across grass lake with no assistance. he told everybody to meet him at grass lake on Sunday at 12: 00. so when everybody showed up on sunday, dr. garrison finished his task by getting across grass lake. how did he do it?
grass lake was frozen
what's a scaredy cat's favorite dinner?
chicken wing
what does a fish say when it runs into a concrete wall?
dam
one gate which we can enter
colgate paste
I am served at a table, in gatherings of two or four served small, white and round. you'll love some, and that's part of the fun. what am i?
ping pong balls
what has 2 head, 4 eyes, 6 legs and a tail?
man on horse
a cowboy rides into town on holiday, stays five days and leaves on paddy. how is this possible?
horses name is friday
a ship that puts a road in order, what is it?
smoothing iron
imagine your on a boat in the middle of an ocean surrounded by sharks. how do you escape?
quit imagining
what is your name? what is the color of the sky? what is the opposite of town?
your name blew up
I have a flame but i'm not a fire pit i use gas and i'm usually black sometimes right on your patio what am i?
grill
who do witches stop for on the highway?
witchhikers
what animal is brown, very young, and how?
kangaroo baby joey
I go up and down the stairs what am i
railing
a person gave birth to a pair of twins. both were girls. the girls gave birth to quadruplets. two were boys and two were girls. the girls would give birth to how many kids. how many kids did they both give births to?
8
I appear to be a hulking brute, but in reality, I am a gentle giant, my name can also mean an expression of anger or frustration
aaarrrgghh
a building where people and stories are on stage
theatre
there are two pigs in the front two pigs in the back and one pig in the middle. how many pigs are there?
three pigs
3 words mean the same. trapdoor, water, wolf.
theyre all spiders
what boss do corn hate the most?
kernal
what is hot when you put in the refrigerator and when it comes out it is still hot?
hot sauce
when you expect the unexpected what will happen?
expected
if i told you she rest beneath the stars and is under the blade and chalice what am i referring to?
mary magdelene tomb
theres a kid who runs away from home he runs turns left runs turns left runs turns left when he gets back home there are two guys in masks who are they?
catcher and umpierr in baseball
whats the one thing we have all seen and we'll never see again?
yesterday
what your eyes think is there actually is not, but the magical image is hidden within the " plot. " what is it?
optical illusion
what does the artist like to draw best?
his salary
I have a long brunck i said tunck what am i?
elegirre
what is a mathematician's favorite dessert?
pi
flat as a leaf, round as a ring; has two eyes, can't see a thing. what is it?
button
I am red and square. what am i?
red square
I am born in fear, raised in truth, and i come to my own in deed. when comes a time that i'm called forth, i come to serve the cause of need. what am i?
courage
what type of cat lays eggs?
cat fish
on my way to it. lives i met a man with seven wives, the seven wives had seven kids, the kids had seven cats, the cats had seven kittens, the kittens had seven mice. how many people / animals were traveling to sea. lives?
oneme
there is a path through the woods. it goes in one side, and out the other. how far can you walk in?
halfway
there was a plane crash on the border of Mexico and the bus. thousands died. it was all over the news. t. v reporters were on every day giving us the info. they just didnt figure out one thing, where to bury the survivors. do you know?
you dont bury surviors
fired and nine are dead on the floor. with them on the floor is shattered glass, a baseball, and water, there is an open window on the wall. what happened?
fred and jane are fish
im green, black, red, i live in the dark and never see daylight what am i
dont noyoutell me
when you catch it you can't throw it back. you don't want it when some one gives it to you. the longer it takes you to catch it, the worse it will be when you do. once you catch it there is no way you can drop it. the closer the friend you are to some one, the higher the chances of you giving them the thing they don't want. what am i talking about?
chickenpox
whats as high as it is low, as far as it is close, as tall as it is short, as to one side as much as the other, torn by 2 as neutral as can be?
middle
which is the table we can eat?
its vegetable
the one who has it does not keep it. it is large and small. it is any shape.
gift
what has 4 years and is really long?
mississippi
so, a man was walking through the woods and he comes across a cabin. there were two people in the cabin but they were both dead and there was nobody / nothing around. how did they die?
plain crashed
what does no man want, yet no man want to lose?
job
why is a cook bad?
he beads the eggs
why do ducks have feathers on their butts?
to hide their butt quacks
who pulled excalibur out of the stone? noah or moose?
neither it was king authur
I am only useful when i am full, yet i am always full of holes.
sponge
i like homework. i like math. i like to give out home work. i ask many questions. i am smart. i like kids sometimes. i am part of a group. what am i?
human teacher
what goes up and down but dosent move
staircase
if you got hurt you would like me. if you some people think I'm too overrated and dramitized. and some people go too far. what am i?
attention
I will be every were but you can see me who i am?
answer air
a man is planning a trip from new york to Atlanta. to save gas he plans on taking a horse. the day that he leaves is a friday but he a arrived on the same friday. how could that be?
horses name is friday
there's a burden family with a miss, six, they take sips, and love me, myself and i. erase the s and leave the eye's invisible, whats the family's favorite river?
mississipi
what has 22 legs and 2 wings?
football team
jacks mum has four children one is called north, the 2nd east, the 3rd south but what is the 4th?
answer is jack
captain is too private as master is to
slave
as my phd dad ads
fivedegrees
this is a pear - shaped fruit with a rough leathery skin, smooth oily edible flesh, and a large bit in the center it is most used in guacamole dip
avocado
there was a bus driver, 7 people got on the bus and 5 got off, 8 people got on 9 got off what is the bus drivers name.
he doesnt have one
which jam you dont like to eat?
traffic jam
what is the first thing you do every morning?
wake up
what do you enter then become?
depression
what did the meat say to the hamburger?
nice to meat you
what is red, white and black?
penguin holding its breath
what do you call a dogcacher?
spot remover
a cowboy was riding on a horse to a ghost town on Wednesday. he stayed at the ghost town for five days. on the fifth day, he left on holiday. how is this possible?
horse was named friday
what does hi - c stand for?
hic
I am the word that is always spelled correctly by everyone what am i?
correctly
the eight of us go forth not back to protect our king from a foes attack. what are we?
chess pawns
you can do this with your friends. you can do this with your nose. but don't do it with your friend's nose!
pick
you can use 2 coins to make 30 cents, 1 is not a nickel, what are the 2 coins.
quarter and nickle
a little girl is riding and said mommy are we going to catch up with the train the little girl's mother asked what train the little girl laughs and says the one that just came through. the mother then then asks the girl how does she know a train came through. how does the little girl know this?
it left its tracks
a plane going from Mexico to california crashed on the border. where do they bury the survivors?
you dont bury suvivors
at young i am tall, at old i am short. what am i?
candel
why did the computer go to the nurse?
it had a virus
I am a good girl. i eat all my food and i drink allmy juice. i am to die for what am i?
to die for
what do you do when a bull charges you?
pay it cash
why didn't the oyster share its pearl?
because it was shelfish
there was once a boy his name was that he lives in the new world what am i
troy
when a carpenter starts a new house, where does she strike the first nail?
on the head
how is it theres 25 married people in a ball room, but theres not one single person there
there all married not single
this mexican dish is a type of flatbread made of crushed flour or cornmeal and is cooked and then enjoyed hot or cold it is used especially in making quesadillas
tortilla
one of these is all you really need to stop a cut when it starts to bleed. what can i?
bandaid
on christmas eve santa comes to bring the presents to the good boys and girls. but which way does he come in?
you still believe in santa
yo mom is so fat she fell and ate a red book. how is that so?
driving drunk kills
angels fly, planes fly, butterflies, and birds fly. what doesn't fly?
butter
he's a boastful, puffed - up fellow, wearing spurs; eyes gleaming yellow. as he proudly struts about, he's in charge, there is no doubt. what is he?
he is a rooster
what goes into the water red and comes out black?
redhot poker
how many apples are on a cherry tree?
none it a cherry tree
where were your parents when the lights went off?
in the dark
a certain man was travelling with his son and he got in on. the man died but his son survived, he was unconscious. the boy was being rushed to the hospital. when he arrived the hospital, the doctor said " how can I treat this boy? " " he is my son? " who is the doctor?
boys mother
which is the largest room in the world?
room for improvement
there was an old man, he looked on the ground and drew his name on the ground. what was his name?
his name is anddrew
take one out and scratch my head, i am now black but once was red. what am i?
you strike it a match
as I was going to stay. lives, i met a man with seven wives, each wife had seven sacks, each sack had seven cats, each cat had seven kits, kits, cats, sacks and wives. how many were going to eat. lives?
one the man
what has a head and a tail but no body? is that possible?
quater