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I ask all my friends, family, and therapist for reassurance constantly...to the point where I realized I've become very manipulative to get it in order to relieve the anxiety and crushing critical thoughts. It sucks donkey balls big time.

Damn. I am you. I do 5 hour shifts, where I force myself to sit in a chair and do my job. I cannot stand up. I prepare for this 1 hour beforehand. Clearing my uterus and rectum in the bathroom and all. This is how I get the work done. Its extreme will-power once a day. Once I complete such a shift, I reward myself with cigarettes or whatever. Dont ever smoke. You will regret your 2000th cigarette.

Okay, I read all 212 comments and no one said they just watch all 5000 videos in the moment and let their whole life set on fire to do so. So just me? ADHD imposter syndrome is real tonight.

Holy sh*t I wish I had known about this. This is so smart.

I hate this so much!! I was researching ADHD experiences and others have called it "Waiting Mode" which makes it a lot easier for me to explain

this saved my day!!!!! i woke up with a new obsession attacking. couldn’t leave it behind!!! suddenly i started worrying i’d manifest it by worrying so much. see this post instantly after and now i feel like i can relax.

More like "bro that mf wants me to burn your house down with your family in it. We don't listen to what he says"

Huge same, I know it looks stupid but I always make dumb connections between things and this just adds fire to that.

10-minute Online Survey for Individuals beginning treatment for OCD (less than 3 sessions in) My name is Alex and I am conducting an online study on individuals with OCD in an effort to improve treatment outcomes. The criteria to participate are that you: 1. Have been diagnosed with OCD. 2. Are at least 18. 3. Are being treated with Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP; i.e. your therapist has been instructing you to do things that you find scary or that you previous avoided, such as practicing shaking hands with someone when you believe their hand may be contaminated). 4. You are just beginning ERP treatment/you have not yet completed 3 ERP sessions (intake, assessment, and intro sessions do not count) 5. You cannot be actively psychotic or intellectually disabled. 6. Are comfortable granting permission for your therapist to be contacted to answer questions about your treatment. Questions about this study can be directed to [email protected]. In order to participate in this study, please go to http://tinyurl.com/yygucsce. All participants will receive a $10 Amazon gift card for their time. Your help is very much appreciated!

Holy shit, me too. Can we talk about this? I’m so glad to know that I’m not alone.

I have these all the time, my most common ones are when I'm outside and I sit in class and the teacher is talking and I fear I will start shouting or singing or something, but it can also get much worse, like I'm gonna hurt a baby if I see one or something. It's killing me.

Dude I feel. This is why I’ve seen both the office and Bob’s burgers 10+ times through.

My parents started disinfecting the door knobs, even money bills. I was genuinely in shock, because when I used to do stuff like that, they told me I was exaggerating.

Me when trying to do my online work, once I get started I get tons of it done in a short amount of time but before that I just panic because I don't know where to start

My last job I was at for 4 years and the owner ended up hating me and thought I was mean. She was the one who hired me and loved me! Then as time went on and I was honest about things when they got fucked up or how I thought she used some of the other employees for free social media work and free artwork. I told her it was wrong and that if people work they should be paid for it. It shouldn't matter if the are college kids or not. She wanted me to compliment her more but I told her I don't do that because you want it. I do it only if I mean it. The last 6 months I worked there we couldn't even be in the same room at the same time. It was sad to me and I really liked the job but my "novelty" wore off. It also happens a lot with friends too. Starts off great and then fizzles out. Even my own family things I'm mean because I'm too honest. People don't want that but my mouth just walks off to a place and my body follows right along. It makes me feel very alone.

I usually say "no I'm I'm gonna over think !" Or "no I'm not doing this!"

I’m a few months in to being medicated and I’m still amazed at that first dose. I have certainly leveled out by now, but I can take myself right back to how good that first day felt and remember that everything is going to be okay because I am okay now. It’s like I finally have access to the place inside me that is happy all the time for no reason. I used to be sad all the time for no reason and I never could escape it but now I can. Ugh now I’m crying about how much better things are. Wishing you all the luck in the world on your adhd journey!

I'm currently working through receiving a diagnosis, and this describes to a T every feeling I've experienced around communication my entire life. I've struggled with anxiety and depression because of it, and I've told myself too many times that something must be wrong with me because why can't I just have a normal conversation with someone without getting lost in a flood of racing uncontrollable uninterpretable mind-dumps? I was very anti written communication as a kid because I could never organize my thoughts enough to even put a single thing down on the paper, but I realize now how truly amazing, eye-opening, and even cathartic it can be. You can dump your mind, and then take time and care to re-arrange and re-piece together the story into a narrative that truly represents your thoughts and feelings. I've ended up keeping just about everyone in my life at a safe distance from me, with the exception of my wife who pushed me to finally seek out help. I'm also described as a quiet type introverted person, and I think to a large extent I am truly introverted, however at the same time I've created this persona of calmness and quietness in order to hide the tumultuous nature of my thoughts and mind, which I perceived for years to be full of character flaws. I would constantly second guess myself saying "I'm fine, I just need to try harder" or "I just need to think harder about my words and just communicate" but I know now it is so much more complex than that and I never would have been able to recognize that there was a possible disorder interfering with my life without the help of my therapist. And for all the years I didn't get help, I know now it's not that I didn't want help but rather that my brain has been in a state of dysfunction, actively and subconsciously working against my efforts and desires to seek out help

Now imagine having both along with being a T1D... not sure how I even made it this far.

This happens to me all the time. My doctor actually first diagnosed me with anxiety alone, but then later diagnosed me with OCD that was causing my anxiety.

Why is this actually such an accurate description of intrusive thoughts-

Some videos are boring to just watch and only really work for background noise- I created a "listen later" list for them, and make sure to remove them when I'm done with them

Nope for me people don't normally have guns in my country

This is me at the gym counting reps, at work watching the timer(my line of work is unique in that it involves specific time intervals).

I really love this, it made me emotional 😭. It looks great!

I plan to do that, too, once I have the money for it. I know I will have some trouble once I move out from my parents', but I also know that it is not really my fault, so I already had this in mind to do. Don't feel bad about hiring a nanny, many celebrities basically do it too 😂 They have someone who cleans for them, does the dishes, the laundry, etc.. We should not feel ashamed.

This was so beautiful I'm crying right now, thank you so much you're a beautiful being of light and so sorry for what's happened. Peace or shall I say Chaos and love haha 🙏🤍 (That was a joke to how Chaotic life can be with ADHD just thought I'd specify, also that kinda rhymes.)

this is me right now me: “okay you washed your hands perfectly, we’re all good 😌😎” me 2 mins later: “fuck no wait-“

I’ve never been diagnosed but I’ve always expressed that I thought I have adhd and every time I hear a symptom of it or see a post on here I relate to it so hard

I’m not in university, but my company has gone to “default work from home”. I was still going in for a while, but my partner is having mild cold/flu-like symptoms, so I’ve been staying home to be extra-cautious. Work from home is okay for me occasionally, but more than a few days and it really starts to wear on my mental health. I hyperfocus so much harder, and I can’t direct it as well, and I just struggle without other people.

I don't think it's an ADHD thing, it's a human thing

This headline made me laugh so hard. And then cry a little. I haven't even read the post yet. Feel like this needs to go on my fridge or something - motivational reminder? 😂😳😭

Thank you, because of your dad I now learned how to fly

My solution to this has been singing or fishing. Essentially meditation where my brain can single task with full concentration on something that creates good feelings. I'm able to relax even though no work gets done.

Anyone found a good medication combination for the trifecta? Vyvanse works good for me but doesn’t quite cover the anxiety and depression side of things. Tried some antidepressants but find most don’t work for me.

I dont think anyone has ever said something that really nails how I am feeling or gets it. I'm ecstatic, but also sad, that others understand it and feel the same way. The way I've always tried to describe it is that "I just feels like my bones do not fit into my body right" and that no matter what I do I just cant be the good person I want to be, l though that clearly doesnt make any sense.

I feel this so much right now. One thing that helped me in the past was getting super into fitness (not a replacement for therapy or medication or anything like that calm down people) and I think it worked because by the end of the day I was too tired to have the mental energy to ruminate and obsess. Things are so bad now I haven't worked out in months though

I remember learning about the parts of the brain in 5th grade (including the memory part) and I couldn’t stop worrying that the memory part of my brain was somehow defective (despite having a top-notch memory). Once I found out what ocd was it made a lot more sense😂

Can we find a way to pin this to the top of my feed every hour on the hour :)

It physically pains me how many times I’ve been told to stop overthinking like I haven’t tried everything under the sun to not hyper-fixate on things I’d rather not even think about.

thanks for advice I was worried about this until I started obsessing about something else. That’s typically how it goes for me I obsess about a certain thing until another comes up, I found that focusing on my breathing and trying to meditate made it subside for a while, but I mostly just played games. Now that I am to busy worrying about other obsessions it doesn’t show up. I always think that going through all this torment makes us stronger and better equipped to handle difficulties in the future because we can appreciate how stupid a lot of the stuff we worry about is. I also take comfort in the fact that me worrying about stuff like this doesn’t change the fact that we have responsibilities and that the sun will come up in the morning every day, whether or not I’m dealing with this stuff. It can be hard considering music is a way to deal with the stress but when all you think about is the music stuck in your head you just want to never hear music again. I don’t know if I’m lucky but when I go out and do things my obsessions seem to disappear, but I guess that’s why they say an idle mind is the devils playground because any mental illness loves to show up when we are not occupied. Sorry for the rambling but I had stuff on my mind I guess.

For me, it's pretty weird A few months before I was diagnosed with OCD, my older sister had said something to the effect of: do you have OCD or something? And I was totally offended and hurt even though I didn't really know what it was. Well, I went to a mental hospital a few months later and at the end, my diagnoses of OCD was given and I was in shock but almost relieved. I finally knew what I had, and the next step was awaiting me: partial hospital specifically designed for those who have OCD.

This is me, with the exception of 2 or 3 things, ex: binging sugar— I don't crave it much since being on metformin. Salty snacks and cheese? I'll beat down a grown man for a plate of chips and queso.

omg i literally thought i was the only one who thought this kinda thing and it made me crazy

My most played song, (Tranz by Gorillaz) which I first streamed in March, hit 100 plays by mid April, about half the plays through the year. If that doesn't show how quickly I listen to music, nothing does.

I have too many alarms in the morning. I ignore them to the point that I spend three hours in a limbo state of sort of awake, sort of not.

Hahaha so true 😂 Convincing my brain that we are not schizoprenic was so tough. Lol it took me 3 months or smth hahah...

the eyelash thing and the shower thing... oh man. can relate. same with the door.

Obsessed on A&E was pretty good. Was unhappy they cancelled it after the second season.

I've thought about this before, I can't tidy my own place but I'd happily tidy someone elses. I wished there was some system where you could tidy someone elses house and vice versa but then I just realised you could pay someone to do it and earn the money doing something else.

I ate a burrito! I already was, but I'm counting it still.

Either 1) they want to be cool and trendy because faking mental illness is very popular on social media right now, or 2) they don’t understand it at all and just think OCD will make them neat and organized

Absolutely 💯 % and this includes everyday things from everyone, including my Partner, and holy fuck I’m surprised anyone has been able to stay in a relationship with me because that must be exhausting for them because it’s exhausting for me.

God yes. 80% of the time I do anything creative it’s working on a new project for the first time. It’s so hard to just go back and finish something

This is so true! I do this and really trying to stop. Also apologising when I know I am not wrong to be reassured I'm not wrong...

2, 4, 14, 17 and 69 (nice) are good numbers. 4 especially pleases me. But I use only 5 when I need to do something for work. If I need to stack something I stack it in 5, never 4. But 4 makes me feel very good and grounded at any other times.

You’re so lucky. I’m too scared to say i have it because it’s not the contamination kind or having odd rituals, mine is “I’m scared of liking children.” Not easy to share at all, I hate it and wish i had a different obsession.

Oh god I feel like I get that for others. That I’ll stab a family member or something.

Jokes on you, I also suffer from untreated crippling depression lmao.

Yeah I have just started to let myself start every creative project I want to and so far I've eventually managed to get enough bursts of focus over time to finish 98% of them (even if it takes 2 years...), the other 2% of them I end up hating and pull apart to use for other projects. I currently have 18 knitting/cross-stitch/sewing/painting/studding/etc. projects going on right now and while it sounds insane, and I'm sure it annoys my roommates slightly how much space they take up in the apartment (though I contain them nicely to not be in the way), I have a list of all of them and go through it every so often so I don't forget about any of them. And I'm confident they'll all get finished... eventually. Edit: And if I'm counting correctly, I also have at least 10 project ideas lined up for starting when I finish some of these, I just haven't had the strong urge to start them yet and have been fine alternating between the ones I already have going. It means I probably won't end up getting around to all of my ideas, but that's alright too.

I hate cbt, especially the way it was done to me. My therapist basically blackmailed me to stop compulsions or he would end therapy. After a year of basically bullying me to stop, he (thankfully) ended our sessions and said he can't work with me anymore because I'm the one that can stop this and I'm not trying enough. I was devastated at the time but I'm a million times thankful now because I got a lot better when I stopped behavioral therapy, I started simple therapy, and I realized this cbt shit made it a thousand times worse than it already worse. I can't say it never works, as it is always different for everyone, but just because it is supposed to be the most efficient it doesn't mean it always works.

Mine told me that if I did not hit the trash can with my piece of crumpled paper - I’d never become a zillionaire. To be fair, my OCD was right. Also, it frequently tells me that if I prepare for something - I’ll perform far worse than just go in cold. So I’m quite the underachiever. Also, things have to be just right or I am often very irritated and horrible with anyone who might want to live with me. So I am all alone now. Oh well.

Oml I thought I was the only one. I will tirelessly do any compulsion my brain can think of but the moment I want to clean my depression just kicks in full force.

My psychiatrist slipped up and told me to just stop thinking about it. I figured she was having a bad day. I smiled at her and laughed and said, "If only I could, I wouldn't be here." But yeah. I try to not take it to personally

Thanks. Good one. We can live such separate lives nowadays, as if we are just roommates. Maybe this will help a bit.

It's fucking hell. I hate these normies that think it's about being clean.

I'm new to actually starting to understand my OCD so I hope this isn't a stupid question, but what's ROCD?

I honestly only really relate with 5% of the content here. Maybe I’m just odd

I certainly am disorganized, and sometimes even dirty.

My ADHD is crucial but I've never forgotten to finish. I'll pray for you.

Not anymore. This shit hasn’t affected me for 2 years. Seems like I learnt how to control them.

Me. I want to clean shit but I always over think it and my brain shuts down. I mostly get intrusive thoughts, excessive guilt, and checking instead of rituals and routines.

in my defense i just started procrastinating and this is the first thing i’ve seen on reddit today

Yes. I like this. Having ADHD is hard don't get me wrong. Life is sometimes overwhelming, but at the same time when I set my mind to something. I am a force to be reckoned with. I look at the world from the angles, sure sometimes I miss the obvious path, but I see connections that many miss. It's not all bad.

Ha! Mad props to you if you managed not to hang up on her at that moment.

This could possibly be OCPD NOT OCD. When will the media get it right and add 1 mf letter.

See, I have to take medication holidays because adderall XR causes me erectile dysfunction if I stay on it when I’m with my partner on the weekends

Omg yes! I use to think I was hearing voices cause my intrusive thoughts felt so foreign!

I'm not trying to excuse it,. Just pondering...I think when people say that what they really want is motivation. They see cleaning /organization ocd as just being really motivated, not as being tormented. They want the motivation and energy to clean that way. Because they don't really understand the torment part of it.

When I was 17 I kept telling myself I was gay and that I didn’t know it the whole time. That went on for another 3 years. So traumatizing

I’ve done this with my last and current relationship and it helps a lot. Really reaffirming

Yeah especially when the panic attacks happen at very inconvenient times.

Awesome story! I've done similar things with my wife and kids.

If I hear the phrase, “but you have so much potential!” one more time,I will start throwing punches.

I will be circling back to read this again, but I just wanna say my doctor (before she went and retired like a jerk) was the main reason I got any treatment at all. I told her all the stuff my first psych told me and she was like, "okay well that's just ridiculous we're scheduling you an appointment with someone else." She stood up for me, she explained how it affected her, and she's a saint.

As someone who unknowingly had ADHD my entire life, I’ve never related more to anything. It may not seem like a big deal to some people, but after years and years of being seen as the “awkward” kid, it’s enough to make anyone question their self-worth. Thanks for sharing this

I think its' current name is just a mashup of all the previous iterations. "Attention Deficit Disorder" seems to fit, but doesn't account for the differences in Inattentive and Hyperactive. So they threw the "Hyperactive" part into the overall name. Well, then that gets confusing because "ADHD Type Primarily Inattentive" is a contradiction. I guess it's shorter than "Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, hold the Hyperactivity", but still.... I jokingly call it "SOS".....Spaced Out Syndrome....lol.

Whats really messed up is when ADHD distracts you from the fact you have it or depression. It is very good at keeping you in denial for a long time.

Wait what is object emotional impermanence? Like fear of loss?

It's funny because for me, I want the first bite so I don't get anybody elses germs. My friends (bless them) always ask me if I want a sip of their drink or a bite of their food before they dig in because they know I can't have any after they begin.

So often, even when I’m not on medication and know I need to eat and hydrate but the thought of eating or drinking water is so unappealing

Ugh I hate that I worry too much about if their right. Like did I manifest this? It’s exhausting I could get so much done if I wasn’t so consumed

This is AMAZING! I used to do it for so long and so many times and I know exactly how hard it is. I'm so proud of you.

I struggled with this for YEARS. It still sometimes comes up whenever I'm in lgbtq spaces tho and I'll sit there like "what if I am straight and lying to myself??"

This was me last night. Just going to finish this quest, and make that thing. Then I'm going to bed. Oh fuck it's 4am. It's midnight right now. Going to bed right now.

Hey, all. Struggling stepmom here who isn't affected by ADHD, but desperately wants to help my stepson. What IS the best way, in your opinions, to redirect and reinforce someone with ADHD? My 7 year old stepson doesn't seem to respond to positivity nor negativity. Long story short, I'm at a loss as to how to help him. I've tried everything in my teacher repertoire and mother portfolio. Tried heart to heart talks, explaining the "why", asking nicely, yelling, cussing, guilting... (I'm not proud of those, and I regret that they've happened). I just get so angry that he makes bad choices. This morning; okay you forgot the dog's water. Forgetfulness happens. But intentionally not taking the adhd medicine so that you can be silly in the mornings? Not okay. Rubbing lotion into the carpet instead of your skin? Not okay. Brushing your teeth sans toothpaste and water? Not okay. And it's EVERY morning we go through this. Same thing every single day. I'm exhausted of it, and I just want to get through to him. I don't want to resent him, and I don't want him to resent me. I want him to think back on his childhood as happy, not all of us fussing at him. Not all the parent-teacher conferences that explain how awfully he's behaved in school.

Can someone explain what "on read" means in the context here? Is that like the last text message just says "read" and there's no more communication?

wowwww this literally just happened to me today. Procrastinated on picking up a purchase, the store cancelled it, and when I went to buy it again - it’s $30 more expensive, there was some sale that ended today. My b

I'm in this picture, and (I don't like it), I no longer feel alone

I just wish that it was okay to other people that sometimes 'My Best' actually means I'm completely brain-tied and can't do anything except stare at the wall wondering which thread I should be pulling on to unravel the whole thing for 2-6 months.