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Hire a Good Boss
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Hiring a good boss or manager can be much more time-consuming than hiring for non-supervisory positions. A successful candidate shouldn't just be able to do the necessary paperwork, negotiations or whatever the job entails.
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Selecting a nanny can be tedious. These are all the right questions to ask your nanny to determine if he/she may be the right fit your your family.
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eng_Latn
| 8,700 |
Choose a Parenting Style
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Parenting is a difficult job with no clear instructions for doing it “right.” Children’s personalities and abilities vary and change over time, as does the research on what works best.
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So, you just heard your favourite band are touring the country? Or, that your favourite television show is having a convention? There's just one problem: Parents.
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eng_Latn
| 8,701 |
Recover From Empty Nest Syndrome
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The nest of family love is like a nest of birds. When it is the right time to fly, the young will fly away, as is the way of life. Parents must deal with the absence of family, friends, and love when children have flown from the nest of their family to build their own.
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Not sure what to get a friend who just moved into a new home or for a loved one who has been sick? Instead of the typical house plant opt for comfort food that they can put together whenever they desire.
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eng_Latn
| 8,702 |
Work do people act different at work than at home ..??
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That's their way of "playing the game". To have a different personality in the workplace to get ahead is a common practice. It may be due to the fact that people are very guarded about their "true selves" and their private lives that the work environment and the relationships there aren't deemed worthy of the same level of trust.
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We had a natural disaster. We learned for a period. And then we went back to our normal habits. We had a terrorist attack. We learned for a period and went right back to our old habits. Some one said to set an example. And she is right. If we do as we want to be treated its a start. Teach our children these same values its a start. If we think we a disposable, then we will be treated as such. If we think we are replacable, then we will be. See what I mean. Examples and behavior is the key. Its slow in coming but its the best we have. Disasters dont teach us perminantly to change. It takes patience.
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eng_Latn
| 8,703 |
I never had that luxury but maybe they're pretty smart. They get to stay home all day while the man goes off to work. Seriously, what's more important than taking care of your kids?
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We gave up a really good thing when we went for women rights.\n\nWe lost the right to be good mothers. What's so good about having to work and not even having the choice to stay home most of the time?
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Is your mother home???????
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eng_Latn
| 8,704 |
I want a new role within the family
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Life & style: Private lives: After 23 years of marriage, I feel I have earned the right to change my life and begin a career of my own. But my husband is not being supportive.
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If you're looking for a change of scene this winter, try Switzerland, Turkey, or China.
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eng_Latn
| 8,705 |
Nadya Suleman, mother of ocpuplets speaks to CNN about her amazing year .
"Octomom" -- as she has been dubbed -- says shes damned if she does or doesn't work .
Single mother says shes grown more in past 11 months than in her whole life .
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London, England (CNN) -- When Nadya Suleman gave birth to octuplets in January 2009 the news was greeted with amazement around the world. But astonishment soon gave way to criticism directed at her -- it was revealed that she was already a mother to six children -- and over the ethics of fertility treatment. So far she has weathered the storm and soon her eight babies will be celebrating their first birthday. But how on earth does she cope? "The children sleep all night," she told CNN's Max Foster. "They sleep maybe from 7.30pm to 5am, but there are not enough hours in the day." Caring for octuplets -- six boys and two girls -- poses a unique economic challenge for the 34-year-old mother of 14 who has also been criticized for being jobless. "It's a challenge. It's a double-edged sword. I'm damned if I work and I'm damned if I don't. I can't work a nine-to-five job because that's not going to be enough income to support the kids. I'm trying to secure what I can." Suleman says trying to manage the domestic budget is like "a revolving door of expenses. Every dollar that comes in goes on the kids." "Octomom" -- as she has been dubbed by the media -- does have some help with the child-rearing from three helpers, one of which is dedicated to looking after her child who has autism. Inevitably, it is impossible for her to give each child the attention they deserve. "It would be impossible for a couple. You just try and do the best you can. You try and have special time with each child -- putting them to bed, telling them a story, asking them about their day -- as long as they get alone time and it's quality. I'd love to give them quantity but that's virtually impossible." Despite her experience with fertility treatment Suleman is reluctant for across the board limits on the number of embryos that can be implanted during IVF treatment. "Every case is subjective, every woman responds differently," Suleman said. "Given my past reproductive history my doctor didn't make any kind of mistake, he was guided by what was successful in the past. So only a certain amount of embryos were transferred -- the same amount when I had my twins. The last thing anyone imagined was more than one or two growing." Although the burden of raising 14 children is obvious, Suleman is reluctant to jump into a relationship. She isn't in a rush to find a male role model for her children. "I believe I do not have to put myself out there. I do not have to date. I feel the missing piece of the puzzle will be placed naturally when the time is right. I don't see the point in going out and wasting precious time and energy that I need for my kids." Suleman is currently documenting the experiences of the past year in a book and despite the constant sniping from the media she still manages to reflect positively on the past 12 months. I've definitely grown more in the past eleven months than I have in the past 34 years. I personally believe everything happens for a reason and I've learnt how strong I am. It's a choice who you let into your life and who you are going to allow to affect you psychologically or emotionally. I've learned how to maintain boundaries and how to grow as a result of some extraordinarily challenging situations."
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Although it may have been Jon and Kate Gosselin's unusual family that landed them a reality show, it is their marital problems-- to which much of their audience can likely relate-- that have made them a household name in recent weeks. Jon and Kate Gosselin's marital problems have give their TLC show record-breaking ratings. During the previous four seasons of TLC's Jon & Kate Plus Eight, the couple has bickered, eye-rolled, and jabbed its way through adventures in rearing now 9-year-old twins and now 5-year-old sextuplets. In this past Monday's record-breaking fifth-season premiere (9.8 million viewers), Jon and Kate finally addressed the very topic that has kept them on tabloid covers for weeks: Their marriage is on the rocks. Even without the stress of eight children, rolling cameras, and public scrutiny, all couples encounter tension in their relationships. Below, five trigger points that have tested Jon and Kate in their reality-TV run -- and how to make sure the same stressors don't take a toll on your relationship. Stress trigger No. 1: A growing family . Whether you're bringing home one new baby or six, expanding your brood requires adjustment. Sleep deprivation can trigger depression and anxiety, said Dr. Ken Robbins, a clinical professor of psychiatry at the University of Wisconsin. New moms are also at risk for postpartum depression, and both parents will likely feel stretched for time. Health.com: 4 Myths about healthy sex . Then there's the issue of intimacy, which will undoubtedly be affected with children in the house. "Sex lives of people who have children are worse -- there's data to prove it," said Dr. Andrew Goldstein, an obstetrician and gynecologist at the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine and the author of Reclaiming Desire. "But a relationship is not like a job where you just have to accomplish what is necessary; you can't just put it on autopilot." Smart solutions: Couples need to work together to find creative ways to support and appreciate each other through this transition. • Adjust sleep schedules so that one partner sleeps while the other is awake with the baby. • When possible, get a friend or relative to occasionally help out at night so mom and dad have some time to cultivate their relationship one-on-one. Especially as kids get older, make sure they understand that mom and dad need time to themselves. • Be aware of the signs of postpartum depression like appetite changes, trouble concentrating, loss of energy, and hopelessness. Health.com: 6 Rules for a healthy postpartum slim-down . • Make activities that promote mental health -- such as exercise and social time -- a top priority. Stress trigger No. 2: Career changes . Before Jon & Kate Plus Eight, the Gosselins worked like the rest of us-- she as a nurse, he as an IT consultant. But things have changed since their family morphed into reality-show fodder, with Kate parlaying her notoriety into a career that includes two books, television appearances, and publicity tours. "Kate's career has taken off and I'm a bit lost," Jon told People magazine in April. Any couple going through a similar change -- whether one partner loses a job or takes on a new one-- can experience tension in the relationship. Smart solutions: Couples should speak honestly and listen carefully to each other to see if a career change has affected their relationship. • The partner who is earning less money may struggle with a diminished self-esteem and feel extra sensitive, while the other may feel resentful about being the primary breadwinner. But both partners need to respect the other's role and recognize their situation as shared. In the case of Jon and Kate, "the only reason she can do what she does is because he probably takes care of the kids while she's giving a lecture," Goldstein pointed out. • Find family and friends dealing with this same issue. Talking about shared struggles can help couples gain perspective and give them a chance to feel good about using their experience to help others. • If one partner is out of work, he or she should be encouraged to pursue a new skill set and stay intellectually and physically active. This will improve his or her role within the family and may open new doors in the future. Health.com: Help! My spouse has ADHD . Stress trigger No. 3: Intrusive in-laws . Although most couples don't have extended family announcing their disapproval on national television, it is certainly not uncommon for couples to elicit criticism from relatives over how they're raising their children. When people come together as a couple, they bring their own family's rules and ways of doing things with them, said Robbins. Smart solutions: Family members may have their own ideas about everything from how often you should go out to eat to what religion to observe to whether or not it is appropriate for children to appear on national television. And in all likelihood, both sets of grandparents may disagree. But you do not have to end up in a war over whose rules, if any, you will adopt. • First, listen to your in-laws. But in the end, decide as a couple which rules and guidelines are in your (and your children's) best interest. • Talk to each other. If one partner is under more scrutiny, it's important that the other listen carefully and that both talk about how they may be affected. • Present a united front to your extended family. It is crucial that they know you stand together. Stress trigger No. 4: You pick on each other . Kate has famously criticized Jon for breathing too loudly. He continually seems irritated by her neat streak. "When couples begin to argue over small things, it usually means they have not resolved a more important problem," said. Robbins. Smart solutions: Since the partner who is doing the picking may not even be aware of his or her behavior, the onus in this situation is on the person who feels disrespected. • In a calm moment, sit your partner down and ask him or her if there is something you have done that is troubling them. Be clear about why you feel mistreated and be specific in your examples. • If you're the one doing the criticizing, first consider how much actual damage your partner's annoying habit can do, said Goldstein. "If your spouse is text messaging while driving, that's worth talking about. If someone slurps when they drink -- well, you have to weigh the cost of the criticism versus the change that you're going to get." Health.com: How to care for and cope with a bipolar spouse . • Don't give up. It may take some discussion to figure out what is really going on, but in the end it can prevent unnecessary and unproductive conflict. Stress trigger No. 5: Infidelity . The tabloids have been buzzing with reports of Jon's and Kate's alleged indiscretions, which they have both denied. But it raises a common question for many couples -- what constitutes an inappropriate relationship? Smart solutions: Don't put yourself in situations that you're not comfortable discussing openly with your partner-- even if they don't technically involve cheating. Every couple has to develop its own definition of what is appropriate and what is not. • Sit down and talk about what relationships were like in your family when you were growing up. Maybe you're comfortable with your partner going out for lunch at work with a member of the opposite sex, but not for happy hour. Be open about what feels "normal" to you. • Don't be constrained by other people's ideas of what is right and wrong. This is a private matter for the couple to agree on. • If a line has been crossed, you need to decide together if the marriage is salvageable. If both members feel that there is a possibility of working things out, seeing a professional can help you sort out the feelings you are left with and move past them. Enter to win a monthly Room Makeover Giveaway from MyHomeIdeas.com . Copyright Health Magazine 2009 .
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eng_Latn
| 8,706 |
Nadya Suleman gave birth to octuplets in January and had 6 children already .
Suleman will star in a TV show, produced by Eyeworks' British division .
The "quasi-reality TV series" would film the lives of her children in documentary style .
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LOS ANGELES, California (CNN) -- Nadya Suleman, who gave birth to octuplets in January, will star in a reality television series about her family, a TV executive said. Nadya Suleman will star in a "quasi-reality TV series," says a TV executive. The Eyeworks executive, who asked not to be named, confirmed a Us magazine report that quoted Suleman's lawyer, Jeff Czech, saying a deal has been reached after months of negotiations. The "quasi-reality TV series" would be "an arrangement whereby several events in the children's lives would be filmed in a documentary series," Czech told Us. Eyeworks' British division will produce the show, the Eyeworks executive said. "There is a story to be told" about the family, he said. "They might be several shows aired during a year. There are all kinds of possibilities. It really depends on what the networks want," Czech was quoted as saying. Though he said the show has not been named, Suleman has sought to trademark her media nickname -- Octomom -- for a TV show and a line of diapers. Suleman has six other children. All 14 were conceived through in-vitro fertilization.
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Although it may have been Jon and Kate Gosselin's unusual family that landed them a reality show, it is their marital problems-- to which much of their audience can likely relate-- that have made them a household name in recent weeks. Jon and Kate Gosselin's marital problems have give their TLC show record-breaking ratings. During the previous four seasons of TLC's Jon & Kate Plus Eight, the couple has bickered, eye-rolled, and jabbed its way through adventures in rearing now 9-year-old twins and now 5-year-old sextuplets. In this past Monday's record-breaking fifth-season premiere (9.8 million viewers), Jon and Kate finally addressed the very topic that has kept them on tabloid covers for weeks: Their marriage is on the rocks. Even without the stress of eight children, rolling cameras, and public scrutiny, all couples encounter tension in their relationships. Below, five trigger points that have tested Jon and Kate in their reality-TV run -- and how to make sure the same stressors don't take a toll on your relationship. Stress trigger No. 1: A growing family . Whether you're bringing home one new baby or six, expanding your brood requires adjustment. Sleep deprivation can trigger depression and anxiety, said Dr. Ken Robbins, a clinical professor of psychiatry at the University of Wisconsin. New moms are also at risk for postpartum depression, and both parents will likely feel stretched for time. Health.com: 4 Myths about healthy sex . Then there's the issue of intimacy, which will undoubtedly be affected with children in the house. "Sex lives of people who have children are worse -- there's data to prove it," said Dr. Andrew Goldstein, an obstetrician and gynecologist at the Johns Hopkins School of Medicine and the author of Reclaiming Desire. "But a relationship is not like a job where you just have to accomplish what is necessary; you can't just put it on autopilot." Smart solutions: Couples need to work together to find creative ways to support and appreciate each other through this transition. • Adjust sleep schedules so that one partner sleeps while the other is awake with the baby. • When possible, get a friend or relative to occasionally help out at night so mom and dad have some time to cultivate their relationship one-on-one. Especially as kids get older, make sure they understand that mom and dad need time to themselves. • Be aware of the signs of postpartum depression like appetite changes, trouble concentrating, loss of energy, and hopelessness. Health.com: 6 Rules for a healthy postpartum slim-down . • Make activities that promote mental health -- such as exercise and social time -- a top priority. Stress trigger No. 2: Career changes . Before Jon & Kate Plus Eight, the Gosselins worked like the rest of us-- she as a nurse, he as an IT consultant. But things have changed since their family morphed into reality-show fodder, with Kate parlaying her notoriety into a career that includes two books, television appearances, and publicity tours. "Kate's career has taken off and I'm a bit lost," Jon told People magazine in April. Any couple going through a similar change -- whether one partner loses a job or takes on a new one-- can experience tension in the relationship. Smart solutions: Couples should speak honestly and listen carefully to each other to see if a career change has affected their relationship. • The partner who is earning less money may struggle with a diminished self-esteem and feel extra sensitive, while the other may feel resentful about being the primary breadwinner. But both partners need to respect the other's role and recognize their situation as shared. In the case of Jon and Kate, "the only reason she can do what she does is because he probably takes care of the kids while she's giving a lecture," Goldstein pointed out. • Find family and friends dealing with this same issue. Talking about shared struggles can help couples gain perspective and give them a chance to feel good about using their experience to help others. • If one partner is out of work, he or she should be encouraged to pursue a new skill set and stay intellectually and physically active. This will improve his or her role within the family and may open new doors in the future. Health.com: Help! My spouse has ADHD . Stress trigger No. 3: Intrusive in-laws . Although most couples don't have extended family announcing their disapproval on national television, it is certainly not uncommon for couples to elicit criticism from relatives over how they're raising their children. When people come together as a couple, they bring their own family's rules and ways of doing things with them, said Robbins. Smart solutions: Family members may have their own ideas about everything from how often you should go out to eat to what religion to observe to whether or not it is appropriate for children to appear on national television. And in all likelihood, both sets of grandparents may disagree. But you do not have to end up in a war over whose rules, if any, you will adopt. • First, listen to your in-laws. But in the end, decide as a couple which rules and guidelines are in your (and your children's) best interest. • Talk to each other. If one partner is under more scrutiny, it's important that the other listen carefully and that both talk about how they may be affected. • Present a united front to your extended family. It is crucial that they know you stand together. Stress trigger No. 4: You pick on each other . Kate has famously criticized Jon for breathing too loudly. He continually seems irritated by her neat streak. "When couples begin to argue over small things, it usually means they have not resolved a more important problem," said. Robbins. Smart solutions: Since the partner who is doing the picking may not even be aware of his or her behavior, the onus in this situation is on the person who feels disrespected. • In a calm moment, sit your partner down and ask him or her if there is something you have done that is troubling them. Be clear about why you feel mistreated and be specific in your examples. • If you're the one doing the criticizing, first consider how much actual damage your partner's annoying habit can do, said Goldstein. "If your spouse is text messaging while driving, that's worth talking about. If someone slurps when they drink -- well, you have to weigh the cost of the criticism versus the change that you're going to get." Health.com: How to care for and cope with a bipolar spouse . • Don't give up. It may take some discussion to figure out what is really going on, but in the end it can prevent unnecessary and unproductive conflict. Stress trigger No. 5: Infidelity . The tabloids have been buzzing with reports of Jon's and Kate's alleged indiscretions, which they have both denied. But it raises a common question for many couples -- what constitutes an inappropriate relationship? Smart solutions: Don't put yourself in situations that you're not comfortable discussing openly with your partner-- even if they don't technically involve cheating. Every couple has to develop its own definition of what is appropriate and what is not. • Sit down and talk about what relationships were like in your family when you were growing up. Maybe you're comfortable with your partner going out for lunch at work with a member of the opposite sex, but not for happy hour. Be open about what feels "normal" to you. • Don't be constrained by other people's ideas of what is right and wrong. This is a private matter for the couple to agree on. • If a line has been crossed, you need to decide together if the marriage is salvageable. If both members feel that there is a possibility of working things out, seeing a professional can help you sort out the feelings you are left with and move past them. Enter to win a monthly Room Makeover Giveaway from MyHomeIdeas.com . Copyright Health Magazine 2009 .
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eng_Latn
| 8,707 |
Which factors account for the high divorce rates in Sweden?
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Why is divorce rate very high in Sweden?
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Why do you think Japan is so advanced than other major countries? What's the secret solution?
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eng_Latn
| 8,708 |
What is helicopter parenting?
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What is helicopter parenting, and why do parents do it?
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Why does the media never ask Chelsea Clinton about her father's treatment of women but constantly asks Ivanka Trump?
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eng_Latn
| 8,709 |
U.S. study examined 270 parents who split between 1998 and 2004 .
Break-up children more likely to have behaviour problems or drug abuse .
But researchers found there was no difference even if the split was amicable .
Findings undermine government consensus that conflict is the problem .
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Divorcing parents who try to maintain an amicable relationship for the sake of their children are doing nothing to help them, a major study suggests. The impact of the split on youngsters is the same whether or not the mother and father keep cordial links, it found. The findings undermine a Government-backed consensus that the harm caused to children by separating parents can be limited if the couple remain friends. Scroll down for video . Trauma: Children of separated parents are more likely to suffer behavioural problems later in life whether or not their parents are on good terms, according to a study by U.S. researchers (picture posed by model) Three Whitehall ministries are currently ploughing money into supporting a policy on divorce and family break-up which says that it is conflict between the parents and not their separation itself that harms children. The new study, the first in 20 years to examine how the behaviour of separated parents affects their children, was carried out by US academics. It covered 270 parents who were divorced or separated between 1998 and 2004 in an unnamed US state that compels divorcees to take part in an education programme on ‘co-operative co-parenting’. Of these, 31 per cent considered their relationship with their ex-spouse as ‘co-operative and involved’; 45 per cent were ‘moderately engaged’ with their divorced partner, with some conflict between them; and 24 per cent said their co-operation was ‘infrequent but conflictual’. They were asked to say how their break-up had affected the youngest child in their family. The average age of children involved was eight years. The study, published in the academic journal Family Relations, said that children of divorced parents are more likely than others to suffer ‘external’ symptoms such as behaviour problems or drug abuse, more likely to have ‘internal’ difficulties like anxiety or depression, and more likely to do badly at school. But the researchers, headed by Dr Jonathon Beckmeyer of Indiana University, found that these children’s problems were no worse if their parents continued to row and bicker with each other after the divorce . Cut off: The study undermines a government consensus about divorce which says conflict is the problem . The study said ‘despite the expectation that children fare better’ if their divorced parents develop a co-operative relationship, the behaviour of children as assessed by their parents ‘did not significantly differ’ between the friendly and the fighting groups of divorcees. Divorced parents should be reassured that their children will not be more seriously harmed if they fail to establish a cordial and co-operative relationship with their former husband or wife, it added. The most recent authoritative British investigation into whether conflict or divorce is worse for children was published in 1994. David Cameron’s Coalition has produced a guide for divorcing parents called Sorting Out Separation which tells them: ‘It’s not the separation itself that can cause harm to your children, it’s the level of conflict that they see or hear between parents. This is universally recognised as being very harmful.’ The programme was launched in 2012 by Lib Dem Pensions Minister Steve Webb, who said: ‘Parents working together is in the best interests of the children, and more collaboration helps minimise the impact of separation on them.’ But Harry Benson, of the Marriage Foundation pressure group, said: ‘This study fully exposes the mismatch between parents’ and children’s perceptions. ‘Getting on well might make the parents feel better about their split. But it does little for the children. To them it makes no sense if the parents get on well yet won’t live together. The “good divorce” is a myth.’
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Saying you love your friend's new (ugly) shoes can strengthen your bond . Lying to your loved ones may seem like a sure fire way to push them away. But new research says telling white lies - specifically for the right reasons - can actually strengthen social bonds. Fibbing about how good your friend looks in a (bad) dress or how much you love your partner's (awful) new haircut tends to be good for relationships. But lying to cover up a misdeed or just to get your way is not the way to improve your relationships, says Robin Dunbar, evolutionary psychologist at Oxford University. This type of deception, known as antisocial lying, is destructive and weakens bonds between two people. On the other hand, lies told to help another person or to protect someone's feelings tend to be good for relationships, Dunbar said. Psychologists call this pro-social lying, but it's more commonly known as telling a white lie or a fib. To study how these two types of lies affect relationships within social groups, Dunbar and a team of researchers associated with the Aalto University School of Science, in Finland, created a complex mathematical model, report LiveScience. The model showed that those who tell anti-social lies become slowly isolated from others within their social networks. However, people who tell pro-social lies don't become isolated from their groups. In fact, they tend to form stronger links with others in their social networks. While the researchers created a purely hypothetical model, Dunbar said it could be used to understand how lying affects groups of friends and peers in the real world. Fibbing about how much you love your partner's (awful) new haircut tends to be good for relationships . Researchers speculated that the model . could also help psychologists better understand the effects of lying in . online communities, where much of today's social networking takes place. Social networks that people create . online - on sites such as Facebook and Twitter - mimic the social . networks they're part of in the real world. So, fibbing on Facebook, . much like telling a white lie to a friend over lunch, might actually . improve your relationships, according to the new model. Larry Rosen, a psychology professor at California State University, Dominguez Hills, told LiveScience he finds the Facebook Like button most fascinating. He said that in general, people like things on Facebook because of something he calls 'virtual empathy.' Whether you're liking a picture of your . aunt's cat or a status update from a childhood friend, pressing the Like . button tells a person that you have good intentions or that you support . them in some way, Rosen said. The Like button can function as a type of lie . However, not all likes are delivered with such good intentions. Sometimes people might click the Like button just because they feel it's something they're supposed to do. For these people, pressing the Like button functions as a type of lie. 'I think that in many cases you can consider the like a white lie if [it's done] for reasons that have nothing to do with support,' he said. Liking something on Facebook that you don't actually like resembles giving a dishonest answer to a question such as 'Do you like my new shoes?'. In these situations, you might say something insincere, but only because you're worried that honesty might hurt someone's feelings. And while it can calm your nerves to lie, it could also save your friendship.
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eng_Latn
| 8,710 |
Will the eight year old self be proud of who you are today?
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How would your five-year-old self see you today?
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I would like to know about marriage, careerand wealth through my birth-chart (04-09-1982-Male-08-28AM-IST) Pithoragrah-Uttrakhand-India?
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eng_Latn
| 8,711 |
Why is today's generation so spoiled and rude?
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Is today's generation selfish and lazy? Why?
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How do you feel to be born in a general family in a country where 'reserved' is preferred than 'deserved'?
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eng_Latn
| 8,712 |
MOM FRIENDS, PART 3: Is it really that important to have other parent friends?
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Welcome back to MOM FRIENDS, the 3-part series where moms chat about making friends with others parents.
This is the last leg of journey! So we're asking the ever-important question, the reason we should or shouldn't be chatting "mom friends" in the first place.
Here we go:
Are mom friends really that important?
We talked about WHY it's hard to make and maintain friends as a mom, and HOW moms are doing it (like Facebook, for example). But this question is key.
Most of the moms we spoke to said friendships, whether it be with parents or non-parents, are important. To bounce ideas off of, to vent to, to brag to, to laugh with and more. The key, it seems, is friends make you feel like you're not alone.
Check out what the moms had to say.
As a young mom, having other parent friends helps you feel less like an outsider:
Ashley Lopez, mother of 3:
"When I was younger I thought it was really important to have mom friends. I had my son at 18 and was 23 when I had my daughter. At 18, all of my friends from high school were going out and being a normal 18-year-old. I still wanted to be around other moms so I wouldn’t feel so alone and embarrassed.
When I had my daughter, I was attending ASU and no one that I talked to had any kids so I definitely did not fit in. I don’t know if it was the age or the relationship I was in, but I didn’t feel like I needed to be friends with other moms. Of course it would be nice because they understand your life more, but it’s just not that important to me anymore. I’m happy with the way my life is now with mom friends and my non-mom friends."
Ashley Lopez of Arizona poses with her three children and her husband at their wedding.
Drey Johnson
What Lopez wants people to know:
I think it’s just important to be around people who will better your life as a person and a mother. That being said, I'm also a stepmom and it is important to meet women who are step moms. It’s a different territory and it’s difficult to not over step any boundaries or to just understand the boundaries in general. Talking to other moms truly does help.
It's always good to get advice from fellow moms
Tatyana, mother of 1:
"They’re someone who can offer advise and be an ear. Someone who knows what you’re going through."
What Tatyana wants people to know:
It’s okay not to have mom friends as well. I have plenty of friends who aren’t parents but can provide great examples as individuals.
Kristi Piper, mother of 5:
I have a "Google friend" whom I go to for any questions like where to sign my kids up for football or need-to-know info about the area. "I consider ... friendships very valuable."
Friends remind you of your individuality
Jordan Johnson, mother of 1:
Jordan Johnson poses at the Wooden Shoe Tulip Festival in Oregon with her husband and son.
Courtesy Jordan Johnson
"I think it's important for mom's to go out without their kids every once and a while too. It feels like once you become a mom then you don't get to be your own person anymore, you have to be completely selfless and put your kids first 100% of the time. Some people are able to do that but you shouldn't feel bad for needing a break from your kids. It's nice to go out with your friends and have a conversation without constantly being interrupted."
It's nice to be with people who get it
Araceli Perez, mother of 2 :
"It’s nice to relate to the mom friends that I do have. Most of the time, when my kid decides to act out, I don’t feel discouraged around them since they can relate. ... The best mom friends are the ones that never judge or try to say something when it comes to your choices."
It's different than a romantic relationship
Whitney Ford, mother of 2:
"I notice when I get out of the house, it always ends up being worth it," Ford said. It's "having the empathy and human connection" that is so important she added.
Whitney Ford with friend Alli Mayes, whom she met through a Facebook group for parents in Arizona.
Courtesy Whitney Ford
"It's good for your mental health to have another person that you can relate to on that level," she said. And it's different than a spouse.
"Moms and dads experience parenthood differently, so having other mom friends ... I really do think it's important for your wellbeing."
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Copyright 2017 USATODAY.com
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Sen. Fernando Esteves during a session at the Guam Congress Building on June 27, 2017. (Photo: Frank San Nicolas/PDN)
Sen. Fernando Esteves, R-Yona, on Monday permanently withdrew a bill that would have given some government of Guam employees as much as 52 additional hours of paid leave each year.
Speaker Benjamin Cruz’s office announced the withdrawal of Bill 162-34.
Rikki Orsini, senior policy advisor for Esteves, said the bill, which has not yet been referred to a legislative committee, was withdrawn “to clarify the language.”
“Another bill will be introduced soon,” she said.
The withdrawn bill, called the “Parental Involvement Restoration Act,” would have granted paid administrative leave to GovGuam employees in order to attend school-related events for their children, such as registration, meetings and activities.
It also would require private-sector employers to give their employees as much as 52 hours a year in unpaid leave for the same purpose, and prohibits those employees from being fired or discriminated against.
"The benefits of paid child school-related leave are invaluable as students with more involved parents do better in school, show improved behavior, and pursue higher education in addition to employees demonstrating increased productivity in the workplace," Esteves said last week when his bill was introduced.
Read or Share this story: http://www.guampdn.com/story/news/2017/08/14/leave-bill-withdrawn-new-version-come/563878001/
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What you will think of boys who left his girl because of her parents?
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What you will think of boys who left his girl because of his parents?
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How does it feel for a wife to be elder than the husband?
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| 8,714 |
Why does some people prefer small families.?
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Why do some people prefer to live with small family?
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Is being an introvert wrong or bad for me?
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| 8,715 |
What is a good mother like?
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What are the qualities of a good mother?
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What are some examples of simile and metaphor?
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eng_Latn
| 8,716 |
Do husbands need to hand his salary to the wives every month?
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In Western married life, does the husband have to hand over his salary to his wife?
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How could a boy become a good friend of a girl?
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Carol Costello: Talk to any millennial and you can envision an America virtually marriage-free .
In countries like Sweden or Denmark, people don't feel pressured to marry even if they have kids together .
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(CNN)The marriage apocalypse may be coming. Talk to any millennial and you can envision an America virtually marriage-free, with everyone happily single. I did. And I do. Recently, I talked about marriage with a group of journalism students from my alma mater, Kent State University. They came to me for career advice, which I gave them, but I also picked their brains about politics, religion and marriage. Their views on marriage intrigued me the most. 'Cause, guess what? They don't care what your generation thinks -- they'll get married if and when they want. "I didn't go to college for four years to be a mom," 21-year old Candace Monacelli told me. "There's no housewife degree. I've worked my butt off for four years to get this degree. You want to use it. You want to be successful. You want to have that happy part of your life as well." Jackie Demate, also 21, agreed. "I would have a very hard time justifying spending $20,000 on a wedding when I could go to Europe." At first I thought Jackie was kidding. So jokingly, I responded, "Wow, some people would say, with that attitude, you are undermining the moral foundation of this country!" Jackie didn't blink. "But, Europe!" she exclaimed. "I'm really looking for a travel buddy. And I don't think you need a wedding ring to prove that you love someone. I see a lot of people get married too soon or stay together and are unhappy because they are afraid to be alone. And I would rather be alone, successful and happy than in a relationship where I'm not happy. ... I'm OK being single forever. As long as I'm happy." Before you berate Jackie for prioritizing her love of travel over marriage, consider where she's coming from. A culture rich in divorce. In the United States, almost 42 million adults have been married more than once. That's up from 22 million in 1980 and 14 million in 1960. Percentage-wise, that means that among adults who are currently married, roughly a quarter (23%) have been married before, compared with 13% in 1960. What a fine example my generation is! Not. Still, there are no doubt more than a few parents out there wondering where they went wrong. Especially in light of a fascinating Pew Research report on marriage. When asked if society is just as well off if people have priorities other than marriage and children, 50% of respondents were OK with that. And of that 50%, 66% were adults between 18 and 29. Religious leaders are deeply concerned for moral reasons. Economists are concerned for our collective future. Studies show marriage is correlated with economic well-being, though it is not clear whether the causality arrow goes from marriage toward economic benefit or in the other direction. A study sponsored by the conservative American Enterprise Institute says: "From an obvious standpoint, households with two adults are likelier to have two incomes, improving well-being." On the other hand, the study points out, people who have money may be "more desirable marriage prospects." Bingo on that point. The millennials I talked with prefer their partners to be debt-free and riding high. They also don't want to burden a husband or wife with their own debt. "Right now, I'm 21 years old. And I'm thousands of dollars in debt," Emily Crille told me. "That wasn't something my parents bore. And it's really hard to plan a wedding, or even think about something like that when you owe so much money, you don't have a job, and you don't have a home." I felt a certain sense of pride at their sassy attitudes. As a child of divorce I never wanted to get married, either -- until I met my husband at 38. But, when I was in my twenties, waiting to marry the right man and forgoing children put me decidedly and uncomfortably in the minority. I heard the whispers: Is there something wrong with her? Is she selfish? Unlovable? Perhaps it is selfish to establish a career, travel and have a child on your own. Or, maybe it's exactly right. Scandinavians are just about there. According to USA Today: "In Norway ... 82% of couples have their first child out of wedlock. The numbers are similarly high for Sweden and Denmark. While many couples marry after having the first or second child, it's clear marriage in parts of Scandinavia is dying." The article also points out that "Norway ranked first and Sweden second in the United Nations' quality-of-life survey for 2004, which rates per capita income, education levels, health care and life expectancy in measuring a nation's well-being. The USA came in eighth." In an effort to understand the joys of "sambo," the term for living together in Scandinavia, my producer reached out to Mikael Anteskog Adler, a 35-year-old man from Stockholm, Sweden. "To put it short," he told us, "marriage costs money (party, clothes, rings, honeymoon trip, etc.) and gives no significant advantages, as there are no economic or legal advantages and no real social pressure to get married, or anyone frowning on premarital sex and cohabitation." Wow. Fifty-year-old Anne Lehes, from Gothenburg, Sweden, told my producer, "I believe that one reason for many Swedes staying single is because this is a secular country, so people think they will become fulfilled by their partner, and inevitably they get disappointed and then they don't think the whole thing is worth it." Maybe Christina Hugosson of Uppsala, Sweden, sums it up best: "The notion that marriage is something that you're pressured into seems horrible to me. ... Marriage should be for love, not a matter of expectations, routine and everyday practicalities." My Kent State millennials -- true romantics -- would agree wholeheartedly with Hugossan. Emily told me as much, "Marriage is about love. It's not about planning or timing, and that's what we're all kind of waiting for." Marriage is about love, but you have to be good partners, too. And, as they say, sometimes love isn't enough. Which brings me back to that idea of a pending marriage apocalypse. Would it be so terrible if we all remained single? If I had remained single? I thought about it. So did my husband. We didn't plan to have children, what was the point? In the end, we made a decision based on love and practicality. A commitment would not only prove our love, but also force us to get through the bad times couples are sure to endure. Eleven years later we have no regrets. But, we are not you and yours. Would a society without marriage be just as well off as one filled with "I dos"? I don't know. But I would love to know if you do.
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(CNN) -- War-plagued Somalia, with its crumbling government infrastructure, is the world's most corrupt country, according to a global survey by the international watchdog Transparency International. The group's annual Corruption Perception Index measures perceived levels of public sector corruption. As was the case last year, the 2009 survey found that countries that scored lowest all have something in common: they are fragile, unstable and scarred by war or long-standing conflicts. The group scored 180 countries on a scale of 0 (perceived to be highly corrupt) to 10 (perceived to have low levels of corruption). Somalia scored 1.1. Next came Afghanistan at 1.3, Myanmar at 1.4, and Sudan and Iraq -- both at 1.5 . On the other end of the scale, New Zealand ranked highest at 9.4, followed by Denmark (9.3), Singapore and Sweden (9.2) and Switzerland (9.0). The United States came it at 19 (7.5) and the United Kingdom was at 17 (7.7). "When essential institutions are weak or non-existent, corruption spirals out of control and the plundering of public resources feeds insecurity and impunity," the group said. On the other hand, countries that fared well in the survey have oversight to stem corruption. These include a well-performing judiciary, an independent media, and vigorous law enforcement, it said.
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| 8,718 |
Do parents really love all their kids equally?
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Do parents really mean it when they say they love all their children equally?
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How does it feel to be a child of a pornstar?
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| 8,719 |
There is still a perception that moms should be better parents than dads .
A mom doesn't like to feel that a child loves Dad more .
Advice: Appreciate having another pair of hands to help with parenting .
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(Parenting) -- "Now stay in bed and go to sleep," my husband, Bill, said as he hugged our 3-year-old son, Davey, good night. "If you don't, I'm gonna talk in my troll voice all day tomorrow." As dads spend more time with their kids, mothers sometimes feel they have to defend their territory. I smiled with pity at this poor, deluded man. Several times a night, Davey had been getting up to look at books. I had spent fruitless hours reasoning with him. No way could Bill's threat make a difference, especially since Davey found his troll-under-the-bridge act more funny than scary. But that night, Davey didn't get up once. In the morning he ran around crowing that he'd won and the troll couldn't come. Bill, unlike me, must have known that Davey needed to turn staying in bed into a game. Of course I was grateful. I was also just the tiniest bit jealous. Why hadn't I been the one with the great insight? Why couldn't I talk like a troll? It's comforting to know that I'm not the only mom who's had such moments. Plenty of us admit to everything from mild envy to full-blown resentment of our mates' parenting skills. And that makes us feel ungrateful: After all, we finally have something that mothers have wanted for generations: an extra pair of hands. Today's dads spend 21.7 hours a week on child care and related duties such as shopping and housework, up nine hours from 30 years ago, according to research by the University of Maryland. Which isn't to say that moms still don't handle the vast majority of kid-linked tasks -- a whopping 39 hours weekly. Still, our guys are doing more than their dads did. Fathers clip tiny toenails and baby-food coupons. They read bedtime stories and clothing labels. And while some of our own dads had no clue about how to change a diaper, our kids' dads often have fierce opinions on Luvs versus Huggies. Parenting: Secrets to a made-to-last marriage . We moms say we want our spouses to be do-it-all dads: We're forward-thinking women of the 21st century. Besides, if they did less, we couldn't possibly juggle our busy lives without going nuts. "But we don't want them to take over," says Pyper Davis, a mother of two in Washington, D.C. "We don't ever want to be pushed off that throne of being Mommy." Jealousy and envy and ego, oh my! One reason we're possessive of the parental crown may be that, although society's changed, we still get traditional messages about women's roles. "A lot of our mothers, our workplaces, our TV shows still tell us that moms should do most of the childcare," says Liz Park, Ph.D., a marriage and family therapist with three kids in Crownsville, Maryland. We moms can be good at taking such messages to heart. Parenting: Keeping score in the chore wars . "For women, no matter how far along you are in your career or no matter how much of a feminist you consider yourself to be, at some level you're coming from an assumption that women are caretakers," says Heather Gerken of New Haven, Connecticut, a law professor and the mother of Anna, 6, and Ben, 2. "When Anna was a baby, I would feel guilty about the time away from her," she says. And at home, sharing child care with her husband, she felt a little jealous that he was as central to Anna's life as she was. "Now that I've gone through this twice, all I'd add is that the twinges of regret are overwhelmed by the joy of raising kids together. There's no other reason I can think of for that jealousy, except for the guilty, nagging feeling that you ought to be spending more time with your child." Well, there are at least a few other reasons. The briefness of those precious early years, for one. "When our son was a baby, Brian gave him more of his baths," says Jessica Davis of Chicago. (Both names were changed.) She believed it was important for them to have such one-on-one moments, but "I remember thinking a few times, 'I should take the bath with him!' Especially when they're babies, you're likely to think, 'I want this piece or that piece' because babies sleep so much and quality time with them is much more limited than with an older child." Parenting's guide to kid sleep . Then there's the matter of love. Naturally, when our spouses spend extra time nurturing our children, the kids become extra attached. "David* just adores his dad. He's his little shadow," Amy Conner* of Nashua, New Hampshire, says of her 3-year-old son. She understands the daddy worship; she thinks her husband, is "more playful" with David than she is. "But at first it just hurt because I didn't feel that he loved me as much as [him]," she admits. For some moms, like me, what hurts is a deep-seated notion that we should be better parents than our spouses -- more instinctive, more inventive, more in tune with our kids' needs. D'Anne Gleicher of Alameda, California, finds herself battling this idea when her daughter is sick. Because she can't get paid time off from her job as an attorney, her husband is usually the one to stay home with Ava, 8. "I know he's very capable of caring for her, but I want to believe I'm better at it than he is -- even though I'm not. I think it's the whole 'I'm the mommy and I can fix anything.' It's almost like a savior thing." Working mothers aren't the only ones who long to be saviors. Sarah Mock of Tualatin, Oregon, quit working as a high school teacher when her second daughter was born. "When you've made this decision to stay home, you've given up this side of you where you can shine as your own person. Instead, you feel pressure to shine as a parent," she explains. Which can make it frustrating when your husband is as much fun with the kids as you are. "Recently John helped them make their own version of Candy Land. I thought, 'Why can't I think of things that are more creative?' " she says. "It seems he's doing very well at work and then when he comes home he's doing very well with the kids, so it's like he's doing great everywhere and I'm running to keep up." Who's the boss? If we're not careful, jealousy and insecurity can turn moms into control freaks. So says Park, a recovering control freak herself. "With our first child, I was constantly asking my husband, 'Are you making sure he's getting his vegetables?' It feels good to make the decisions." Trouble is, "the more we control how dads do things, the less involved they want to be," Park says. A recent Ohio State University study of almost 100 couples with newborns backs her up: Researchers found that even dads who believed they should be highly involved in childcare shied away from doing things for their infant if Mom was very judgmental. Parenting: The truth about bonding . So Park recommends trying what she did with her husband and her son, Joe, now 11. "I had to let go and let them have their own relationship -- he's a competent man! If Joe doesn't have a vegetable, who cares?" When you find yourself hovering, Park suggests, leave the room. And if you feel compelled to share some crucial knowledge -- the latest food pyramid for toddlers, say -- try offering him some childcare lit. "That way it's neutral. It's not like you're dictating to him how to do it," she says. Rethinking the rivalry . As for curbing the green-eyed monster, it comes down to discovering things you do well with your kids. When they're babies, simply breastfeeding them is something Dad can't do, and may be enough. Later on, try sharing your passions, from gardening to karate. It's also smart to take turns doing the fun stuff, like playing with the kids, as well as the non-fun stuff (say, disciplining them). Dad's giving the baths? Great. Make storytime yours, instead of moping. Parenting: Play list . Most important, moms say, remember how lucky your kids are to have two hands-on parents. Gleicher hopes that having a caring, involved father will one day spur her daughter to choose a guy with those qualities. "She won't end up with somebody she doesn't respect," she says. Speaking of respect, adds Gerken, it's the best cure she's found yet for parental jealousy. "Just to glory in your husband's abilities as a dad, I think, is key," she says. Next time Bill pulls off a child-care coup, I plan to be a model of admiration. I'll watch and learn. And I won't begrudge him his troll voice one bit -- as long as talking like SpongeBob can be mine, all mine. Try a FREE TRIAL issue of Parenting Magazine - CLICK HERE! Copyright 2009 The Parenting Group. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited.
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Do you always go for the wrong men, but have the most perfect pet? Then this relationship advice may be for you. A leading love expert has suggested there are parallels between picking the perfect partner and the way you choose your dog. Author and relationship coach Dr Annie Kaszina Ph.D - who is the first to admit she has her own chequered relationship history - discovered that by applying these principles she could finally make the right choices. Do you always go for the wrong men but have the most perfect pet? Love expert Dr Annie Kaszina (pictured) says there are parallels between picking the perfect partner and the way you choose your dog. When Annie met Orlandino it was love at first sight: the big brown eyes, the irresistible looks, the knack he had of making her laugh. But sadly, he wasn't a keeper. Beneath that charming exterior lay some unsavoury habits and a difficult and a very demanding personality. Orlandino was the dog from hell. What Annie learned from that encounter set her on the path to becoming a women's relationship coach. She learned her lesson, chose her second dog - and her current lovely partner - with a lot more care, and has since taught hundreds of women simple ways to spot the right man for them, using her pet as the template. Now Annie shares ten of her tips with Femail readers, inspired by her new book, entitled Do You Choose Your Dog More Carefully Than Your Husband?, which comes out on Valentine's Day. 1. Temperament is king . Mean, moody, and magnificent may sound exciting… So, too, may the idea of taking on a challenge, or 'taming' someone 'wild'. Unfortunately, they lead to hard work relationships; and hard work relationships lead to emotional exhaustion and breakdown. Better to look for someone sunny and sweet-natured. Think about the way a date projects himself on first meeting and beyond. Why would pessimism or negativity be an aphrodisiac? Snarliness towards waiters, children, and anyone outside the charmed circle of you and your date is a bad sign of things to come - same goes for dogs! Good manners are paramount . 2. Check the pedigree . Obviously, this is simpler with dogs than it is with people, and can't be settled on a first date. But then Rome wasn't built in a day, and nor should relationships be. You can listen to the way they talk about parents, family members, and friends. If they come across as Billy-no-mates, there is cause for concern. 3. Beware yappiness . Unless you're okay with saddling yourself with Mr I'm Great, Mr Alpha Male, Mr In Love With The Sound of His Own Voice, or Mr Life and Soul of the Party, be careful of over-talkers. Incessant talking on a first date may be a sign of nerves, but also a lack of interest in the other person and a lack of social skills. They need to take an interest in you too (This holds just as true for Strong, Silent Types). Asking non-intrusive questions is not rocket science. You want someone not just to have fun with, but someone who's fun to be around . 4. Good manners . This goes without saying. But it's not limited to table manners. Snarliness towards waiters, children, and anyone outside the charmed circle of you and your date is a bad sign of things to come. Selective good manners actually suggest that those manners are not deeply ingrained and may soon melt away. 5. Over-exuberance . Pushy does not mean keen. It means pushy. First date pushiness is the sign of someone who doesn't respect boundaries and will end up pushing you into emotional corners. 6. Good behaviour . Many a woman who has overlooked a little first date leering - at other women - has lived to rue the day. You have standards for how you would dress and behave on a first date. Your date should, too. If your date's behaviour violates your standards in any way that's a clear sign that you could be in for a rough ride. 7. Docility . You want your date to be sensitive and responsive to your wishes. Choosing your meal for you, unasked, or making decisions for you without consulting you is a clear sign of wanting to be top dog. Do you want to be reduced to playing Bottom Dog? 8. Playfulness . You want someone not just to have fun with, but someone who's fun to be around. That doesn't necessarily mean someone who acts like a kid - what long-term kids are actually looking for is second mummies. You want someone who you feel comfortable enough around to be silly with. 9. Beware rogue breeders . If you've been single for a while, friends may take it upon themselves to set you up with 'lovely dates'. Just because they find that date 'lovely' in the context in which they know them doesn't mean you will. You wouldn't buy a house just on the say-so of Mrs Bloggs three doors down. You always have to do your own due diligence. 10. Leave the paperwork at home . Women are terrible at playing 'Fantasy Future' - they go on a first date and, provided the man isn't an obvious freak or psychopathic monster, they get busy imagining their future life with that person. A first date is not designed to be a marriage contract., it's simply the start of getting to know another person. If you find yourself fantasising about that happy future, take a cold shower, or speak to a grounded friend.
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eng_Latn
| 8,720 |
How important is your family?
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How important is family to you?
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What is the most mportant in life?
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eng_Latn
| 8,721 |
Be Reliable
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Beyond just being dependable , being reliable is synonymous to unerring [1] at a high level, especially important for dangerous or very impactful kinds of work.
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High school relationships are fun and can result in marriages. In the midst of having fun, don't forget to practice relationship-related qualities.
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eng_Latn
| 8,722 |
Compromise
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Coming to a compromise can be incredibly difficult, no matter if it's with your boss at work, or with your significant other. Fortunately, there are ways to make the compromise happen more easily and less painfully.
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Despite the perfect picture families that always seem to loom over us on television, posters and bill boards, there are many more complexities and dynamics to families than all smiles and laughter.
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eng_Latn
| 8,723 |
Deal With Family Problems
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Death, addiction, money troubles, mental illness, separation/divorce, and transitional adjustments all take a toll on the members of a family. During stressful events or when the family’s resources are severely taxed, problems may not be resolved easily.
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Making decisions can be challenging, especially when everyone has an opinion. Focus on feeling self-assured to avoid unwanted influence from outsiders.
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eng_Latn
| 8,724 |
Cope with a Dysfunctional Family
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It is never easy to cope with a dysfunctional family. Family dysfunction can drain your emotional and physical energy. Family get togethers may be very difficult and managing conflict may feel impossible.
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Do you ever feel like no matter how hard you try, sometimes things just don't work out well in the end, regardless of what you do? That no matter how hard you fight, the situation will never get better?
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eng_Latn
| 8,725 |
Parent Children with Opposite Personalities
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Though having children is one of life’s greatest blessings, parenting children who are polar opposites can be challenging. Perhaps one of your children is mild mannered and quiet and the other is loud and opinionated; though one is not better than the other, you must learn to manage and celebrate these differing character traits.
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Divergent career paths present a host of unique challenges that may require both partners to evaluate their priorities and make compromises. It might take some work, but handling issues from relocation to household management is possible when you and your partner strive to develop a team mentality.
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eng_Latn
| 8,726 |
Build Maternal Love for Resistant Stepchildren
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When you marry someone who has children, navigating that relationship can sometimes be difficult. Though you are certainly hoping to enjoy your marriage, resistance from your stepchildren can strain your relationship with them as well as with your spouse.
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It’s sometimes difficult to bake with our children. The thought of the messes, the turn out, and the washing of dirty clothes leaks into are head screaming.
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eng_Latn
| 8,727 |
Do you believe that children fare better when raised in two parent homes- if so why?
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Usually, if the parents are decent people. Many children would be better off if they had no contact with either parent.\n\nIn societies where parenting is more an age-grade thing than actual biology, children have many parents, and are probably the best adjusted psychologically of any.
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well for what it's worth, I have gay friends who have been in monogamous loving relationships a lot longer than many hetero couples. They feel the same hurts, fears, disappointments, as everyone else, have the same dreams, hopes and aspirations as anyone else, and pay the same taxes. Night night :)
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| 8,728 |
Raise a Child
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No one would argue that raising children of character demands time and big effort. While having children may be doing what comes naturally, being a good parent is much more complicated.
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How to be a good Stepparent.
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eng_Latn
| 8,729 |
Remain Sane with Stepchildren in the House
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Being a stepparent can be the hardest, most thankless job in the world. Biological parents at least have the love of their offspring. Stepparents often face adversity from multiple directions, starting with resentment from the children down to not knowing to what extent it's okay to put forward your views and demand some sort of order in the house.
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Livening up your living space does not have to mean an expensive remodel or an entirely new furniture set. Add some color to your home with these easy suggestions for painting stripes on your interior walls.
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| 8,730 |
(your first impulse might not be correct)
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You can be a step-mom if you marry someone with a child older than you from a previous marriage.
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Because I am finite? Because I am fragile? Because I am fallible?\n\nBecause I am dust.
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| 8,731 |
Heal Family Wounds
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On the one hand, addressing old rifts and frayed relationships in the family can be painful. On the other hand, letting past wounds go untreated means you risk losing valuable, long-enduring family bonds.
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Have you ever felt that your children don't fully trust you? This article will help your kids feel more comfortable and open around you.
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eng_Latn
| 8,732 |
Get Along With a Significant Other's Children
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Sometimes, the significant other we've searched for all our lives turns out to be more than we've expected: a father or a mother. It can be difficult for the children involved to get used to a new adult in their life.
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How to be a good Stepparent.
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eng_Latn
| 8,733 |
Stop Expecting Too Much from People
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Human relationships are extremely complex. Often when you begin relationships in any area of our lives, you might expect perfection. When people fail to perform to your standards, you might get upset.
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Does your family do nice things for you? Return the favor and treat them with a surprise lunch!
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eng_Latn
| 8,734 |
why do I feel like I have to have a women to control me,I enjoy it when a women trll me what to do and make me do what she want
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Maybe because by doing what she wants you know she is being satisfied. Keep doing what your doing and the ladies will have nothing but good things to say about you!
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Learn to spell correctly or use your spell check button before you start to insult people so you won't make too much of an A$$ of yourself in front of the world!\n\nP.s.It is called nurturing the children.Probably something you never received as as child so you result to this.\n\nBe Blessed!
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| 8,735 |
of men in our current society toward their wives and children? Include any personal examples if you'd like. Thanks in advance!!
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That's an interesting question! I think responsible men should be caring and thoughtful towards their wives/children. They should try to provide a stable home in terms of income, but I believe women should contribute to this, too (working outside the home whenever possible in order to show children, girls in particular, that a woman doesn't have to stay at home). \nMarried men should be mature enough to not spend too much time with the "guys," concentrating more on their families instead. This doesn't mean don't go out and have fun with male friends, just that there should be a balance between that and family time. \nI believe that men need to provide positive role models for their children and demonstrate to their sons that it's ok to show emotions (what some call their "feminine side")...that it's not a sign of weakness. \nNot trying to be the boss, but allowing that the wife has a right to exercise her authority and place as co-head of household. I don't believe in "lording it" over one's family. \nI believe men need to learn to listen, and actually "hear" what is being said to them. Some men talk too much and aren't used to listening. I don't want my husband to "fix" problems for me, just hear me out when I need to talk about them.\nShows of physical affection...hugs, kisses...in front of the kids is also a good habit to have.
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Is this your homework assignment?
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eng_Latn
| 8,736 |
why do we call sister concern not brother concern?
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Because business concerns(company, partnership firm,etc.) are considered feminine
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coz that's wat luv is all abt.. \nits not only in d heart but also in d mind... 24/7
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eng_Latn
| 8,737 |
Do you think its ok for the mother to work and dad stay home and care for the kids, or should daddy be bringing home the bacon while mama holds down the fort?
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Since the day my 6 week maternity leave ended, my husband has been a stay at home dad. I had just gotten promoted at work and have a good paying career. He is a landscaper by trade, and made less money than I do. He also had no benefits, whereas I have everything from 401k to healthcare and dental. He stays at home, does the dishes, laundry, cleans, vaccuums, and even makes me supper most nights (he's a great cook too). The only real "job" I have at home is folding the laundry after he's washed it....and that's cause I'd rather do it myself than have him screw it up. LOL. It has really worked out well for us. We've avoided the expense of daycare, not to mention having complete strangers caring for your child.\n\nMy family doesn't really approve...my sister actually called him a freeloader once. But this is coming from a stay at home mom whose abusive and controlling husband won't "allow" her to work. \n\nIf I could, I would choose to be the stay at home mom, and let my husband work. For a while I was jealous of the idea that he got to spend all that extra quality time with our son. But now that it's been a couple of years, we have made it work out well for us.
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"“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the other” [al-Nisa’ 4:34]"\n\ni'm not sure how this can possibly be interpreted to say that men excel over women. i think we all know that normally the people who protect and maintain a person is serving them. we can see this because kings were always protected and maintained by their lowly serfs and knights. if the women are meant to be served, according to this verse, then clearly the koran is saying that it is women who in fact excel over men, and men's only use is to serve women. therefore, muslim men have no place in the government, in teaching positions, or making decisions on behalf of a woman. \n\nhas that clarified things a little bit?
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eng_Latn
| 8,738 |
theres a catch though one can be selfish and the other cant be at all .... be honest
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Good health for my son and I.\n2 more wishes.
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Were I the employer, I would look at both, and say, "That's very nice. Now bake me a cake so I can taste what you can do."
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eng_Latn
| 8,739 |
Let's say.....If you, as a woman(age: 30), are in a relationship w/ a man, you love him endlessly & consider as your soul (assuming from your perspective, he's perfect in every aspect of a man that can be; from his personality(charming, caring, devoted, faithful, affectionate, romatic, attentive, intellectual, & compatible w/ u), characteristic(energetic, hard-working ethic, helpful to others in needs), social status(professional: M.D/PhD), physical attribute(6'6'',well-built & very attractive)). Except for one thing, he's 35 yrs old, but HE LOOKS EXTREMELY YOUNG; HE LOOKS LIKE AROUND 18-20 YRS OF AGE....So if you were this 30 year-old woman, do you consider to have a long-term relationship w/ this young-looking man, eventually marriage?\nOr are you afraid of how people are going to stigmatize/judge you (for seducing him w/ $ in order to satify your needs eventhough it's not true) due to the fact that he looks too young w/ you as a couple eventhough he's five years older than you?
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As a 30 year old woman, she should be relieved to find such a handsome, successful, intelligent man around her age. Any person who ends a relationship because of what others might think or say is shallow and inadequate as a partner. If she's talking about you, you're a cutie and she should be glad you're not bald and impotent.
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Hi Kat, \n\nI will not give you any lecture or be judgmental... besides, others have done that already. I will only give you statistics. \n\nLIVING TOGETHER/COHABITATING BEFORE MARRIAGE: Very little evidence of marriage being much better than marriage couples who do not live together prior to marriage. Research does show divorce rate is higher for couples who cohabited prior to marriage.\n\n-AVERAGE AGE OF MARRIAGE: Women 25.3 yrs. old; Men 26.9 yrs. old\n-THE LATER INDIVIDUAL WAITS TO MARRY THE LESS LIKELY THAT INDIVIDUAL IS TO DIVORCE- maturity.\n\n-FIRST YEAR AND A HALF OF MARRIAGE, COUPLES WILL HAVE THE MOST HARDSHIP.\n\n-FIRST MARRIAGE DIVORCE RATE: 55%-60%\n-SECOND MARRIAGE DIVORCE RATE: 60%-70%!!!\n\nThinking about creating a family?\n-ANNUAL COST TO PROPERLY CARE FOR ONE (1) CHILD: about $9500.00\n-MOST BABIES BORN ARE UNPLANNED ("BY ACCIDENT").\n\nMARRIAGE LIFE W/ KID(S): Honeymoon fever is over; marriage satisfaction declines after first baby is born; marriage satisfaction rises somewhat in childhood years; marriage satisfaction declines significantly again during child's teen years; marriage satisfaction increases significantly after last child has left the house!!! \n\nFACTORS THAT CAUSES DIVORCE: Couples do not have same values, beliefs, expectations, etc. ... simply put, love is not enough and opposites do not attract lasting marriages. Couples in an inter-racial marriages must endure current societal stigmatization (prejudices) of such relationships.\n\nCONFLICTS IN MARRIAGE: Money issues; roles of a husband and wife; kids or no kids?; housewife, career woman or both?; which inlaws to visit for xmas/holidays?; joint or separate accounts?, how much time to spend together? etc. etc.\n\nEFFECTS OF DIVORCE: Divorce Children are usually the biggest losers in divorce. Women are next in line with most moving downward from the socio-economic ladder and into poverty, especially if she not a college graduate and has children to take care of. Reality does not sets in for twelve months. It takes another year to three years to get through the effects of a divorce. And still some effects are life-long.\n\nNow you decide, my friend, and best of luck... -Taz-
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eng_Latn
| 8,740 |
I do a bit of part time work in addition to my full time job and my boss has decided that those who have children should get first choice at booking days off (i.e. Christmas, Easter etc). Why should I get second choice? They chose to have kids, I chose not to - why should they get preferential treatment?
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O fantastic question!!!\n\nThis is a personal bug-bear of mine.....I always make a point of parking in Parent & Child parking spaces, and I get told off by the girlfriend.\nDisabled people cannot help their condition & deserve certain facilities, but why, O why, do parents deserve preferential treatment??? They chose to get knocked up!!\nTell your boss that it is discrimination to give time-off based on what you have said, you have just as much right to certain days off even though you dont have children.
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ok it is the best choice\n \n==========================================================\nIf you are single and have the time, please visit my site:\nhttp://www.dating4fun.net/go3.php
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eng_Latn
| 8,741 |
This whole discussion on gay marriage by the Christian community has been based on the theory that between two gay men or women cannot morally exist a loving union as strong as a "normal" family sustained in a father-mother structure. Some have even argued that gay marriage puts the ideal of the perfect family in jeopardy. I think that family is based in love and in healthy relationships between its members more than in a structure based on gender. Even when you look at statistics, it is obvious that children raised by gay parents are as healthy as any other children, so I don’t understand what is it that makes some Christians believe that same sex love invalidates marriage and family. So, why is it that some think that gay marriage will destroy family as we know it?
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I agree with what you are saying. And I think some christians get hung up on certain scriptures about same sex relationships because they don't understand those scriptures in context. \n\nGood articles on that here:\nhttp://www.mccchurch.org/Content/NavigationMenu/Resources/SexualitySpirituality/Sexuality_Spirituali.htm\n\nFollow up: Do you see what I mean about all the people who don't understand those scriptures in context? Not one of them can be bothered with reading the articles and learning something new. It is a shame to see people so close minded.
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This looks like a helfull site http://cirrie.buffalo.edu/jamaica.html\n\nThe roots of the Jamaican family structure are embedded in the historical experience of slavery. Marriage and households with both parents were characteristic of the European planters while slaves cohabitated and were often separated from mates and children. Jamaican family relationships reflect the legacy of both planters and slaves. Upper and middle class Jamaicans tend to assimilate more European standards and aspire to create families that embody these values. Formal marriages occur more often among upper and middle class families or among those who can afford the cost of a wedding. Among the upper and middle class, cohabitation is frowned upon because it does not give legitimacy to offspring, it lowers family status, and it is viewed as immoral. When children are born to unmarried parents in these groups, illegitimacy is often a source of derision for the children.....
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eng_Latn
| 8,742 |
somebody who left twice in this job and just came back for this promotion was chosen instead of me who's been loyal.
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Well what does that tell you? They don't value loyalty. Find a company that does, it's a rare commodity these days.
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I think it revolves around the fact you are still in the "Wife" frame of mind. Well the children, Still married and the rest of the phrases you say. \n\nThree times? you are more commited to your role as "Wife" then your role as yourself or mother. Might watch that. Been known to be dangerous.
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eng_Latn
| 8,743 |
Unless you are a single mother, don't tell me you have too. That's a cop-out.
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because feminism says doing what men do is better than doing what women do.\n\nthis sexism must stop. the tasks of the female role, such as raising the kids and being a homemaker, are just as honourable, useful and downright important as financially supporting the family.\n\ni agree that Western women, at the moment, have less power than men because the church and our society's institutions are so patriarchal. this is because of the church, which, as detailed in the da vinci code, has targeted women - trying to banish the sacred feminine and the goddess from legitimate spiritual experience. the best thing therefore, is to return the sacred feminine and the goddess to society, and particularly women. then they will feel equally powerful, just like men feel powerful having the god and masculinity celebrated as being good in society. \n\nonce this has been done, perhaps western women will feel more willing to engage in their normal roles, instead of trying to do what men do - which are the only respected ones. i can actually think of no more important a task really, these days, than raising fine children though. i think having both parents work and sending the kids off to daycare is not the best way to go about this. the best way is to have either the mother or the father stay home. i think the mother would be the best, as mothers are better generally at raising the kids and caring for the home and maintaining social networks. men are better at going out and doing dangerous and stressful work, or boring, grinding routine work (however you want to put it both are valid) to make sure there is 'bread on the table' (well, the resources to get it/make it at least... the mother puts the bread on the table literally lol, although my dad did make a fantastic loaf of bread... i'm by no means a fundamentalist when it comes to gender roles, as some other answerers make you out to be.)\n\ni really encourage your honesty about the way you were brought up to look at what men and women are supposed to do. all too often we are afraid to raise this point. there is an identical question about men. however, no masculist movement has gone and made men feel valuable only if they do what women do. the prevailing belief in society is, still, unfortunately, that it is shameful for a man to appear like a woman (physically and by doing what women do, like nursing/homemaking).\n\nfor inspiration about this, look at http://www.glennsacks.com he is a major men's activist in america. he is a househusband. i know, it's not what he's supposed to do as a man, but, as some other answerers have said, it's what he and his wife have worked out is best, and best for her (not to mention the kids.) \n\nbasically though, i admire you for having the guts to ask this most fundamental of questions - 'Why isn't the world like it is supposed to be?'\n\nWell done for not being guilty at being disappointed that the world isn't as you expected it to be, based on how you were brought up, and asking a question about it.
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It is much better not to force belief. Sooner or later you will reject it if forced. Best to look at all the evidence and accept what you can, if necessary, piecemeal. For the rest, try and be comfortable to put it on hold until either you learn more or understand more, or grow in maturity. Use also your own gut feeling. That is much more reliable than most of us give it credit for.
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eng_Latn
| 8,744 |
i do not care about other wifes and kids, i love them and respect them for taking care of our husband.i am african , and there is nothing wrong about it in our believes. i am very learned as compared to all other wifes and him also.
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Wew, to be a fourth wife is not easy at all.\nAnd to be his wife with that condition already answer your question. YOU LOVE HIM.\n\nThe point is are you happy with him\nDid he really nice to you?\nIf everything OK, then get through your life happily.
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1. Yes, it was respectful. Politeness is part of the culture of East Africa.\n\n2. "Bwana, bibi, mama. It is courteous in Swahili (and courtesy is very important wherever Swahili is spoken) to use these as titles when addressing people. They can be used on their own or followed by the person's name.\n\nBibi is usually shortened to Bi. when followed by the woman's name, e.g. Bi. Ruth. Bibi is probably more common at the coast than inland. Where both are in use, bibi is slightly more formal, and some speakers tend to use it for younger rather than older women. ...\n\nSometimes a married woman is addressed, and referred to, as Mama followed by the name of her eldest or last child, so Mama Fatuama, Mohamed's mother, may well be referred to, by family and friends, as Mama Mohamed..."\n\n3. Another variant that you will hear Africans use, for women older than themselves, is Auntie. So whether it's "Mother" or "Auntie" you are being shown a great deal of respect. Now you can move away from your eurocentrism.
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eng_Latn
| 8,745 |
My boyfriends 4 kids live with their Mother.Her home is filthy and she doesn't spend much time with them.They have their friends,school, church, and other activities.Two of the kids want to live with us, is it best to leave them where they are and not split them up?Their parents are going through a divorce.
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I think it depends entirely on the age of the children. Is this a permanent situation [splitting them up?] If you believe that the kids are smart enough to make their own decision then let them make it. If they aren't old enough, that makes this choice all the harder. You need to keep their best interests in mind. A dirty house, and an unattentive mom isn't as bad as it sounds. But a mold encrusted, with bugs, worms, etc, with a mom who leaves the kids unattended is something else. It's all a matter of degree. In the end, just make sure it's something that's had a lot of thought. Are you considering raising these kids with your boyfriend? Are you going to be a part of their lives forever? Remember that if you pull the kids out of a comfortable environment, then you'll have to give them something else to make up for it.
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so you are in Korea to study? midschool (highschool)? wow. when i was 14 i was still in our place. im 18 and im away from home too to study college. anyway, a lot of Koreans go to other country to study English espicially to the Philippines. i have a friend who is studying here from thailand. she is 23 though but had a sister aged 15 who is also studying. i heard their brother is also not staying at their place because he is also studying in some place.\n\nanyway, it just came to what our parents think for us to develop pretty good. we have to learn independence at such short time but inm the end evrything will be all right. we jsut have to communicate with our family in a reguilar basis though.
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eng_Latn
| 8,746 |
tonight i told her to go take a bath and she went to her mother which really got me upset and i told her that she needs to take a bath, but she told her mother he is not my\nfather - i told her i may not be her dad but i am the man of this house and you will do what i say. and her mother agreed.\nwhat should i do to be a better father figure?
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Getting an unreasonable child to obey you can be a difficult task whether you are her father or not. I suggest you give her a choice whenever possible. This way, she gets some control over her life and you still get what you need. For example, "You can take a shower now or you can go right to bed now and shower in the morning. I will wake you at 7:00 so you will be prepared." This way, you still get what you need, (a clean child) and she gets what she wants, attention and control. Always give choices that YOU can live with. Also, you say mother agrees, but does she give you support. Oh and being the man of the house is a totally outdated and sexist notion. You are the adult in the house and for that reason the child should follow your directions. Your gender should be irrelevant in this case.
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yes, by all means raise the child as ur own..loving the child is by using truth and being honest.that way they will always trust you.we are who and what we are,encouragement in the good and true things will always result in the best out come.its a real challenge to raise kids,their all basically the same but are different,because of individuality,from ur question sounds like ur doin a great job
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eng_Latn
| 8,747 |
a man that does not work and his been feeded by his wife, what kind of maverious life does it means to be ?
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I'm not sure if 'maverious' is an english word!! So its difficult to understand what you are asking. Are you asking our opinion with regards to a situation where a woman supports a man financially?? If so, I see nothing wrong in it. In this age of equality it is up the partners in a relationship to determine what makes the relationship work. If a woman is capable of supporting a man and the man supports the relationship in other ways (and vice versa) where is the problem? We no longer live in a world of - me Tarzan you Jane!
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WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU ASKING? DO YOU REALLY SPEAKING ENGLISH DID YOU GO TO SCHOOL IN FLORIDA? DID YOU GROW UP IN LOVE CANAL? ARE HOMELESS PEOPLE VICTIMS? ARE THEY MOSTLY IMPOVERISHED. MENTALLY ILL, CAST OFFS OF SOCIETY AND HOPELESS. LEARN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE IT IS USEFUL WHEN TRYING TO COMMUNICATE WITH OTHERS YOU MAKE "HOMELESS PEOPLE LOOK LIKE SUPER GENIUSES!
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eng_Latn
| 8,748 |
why does polygamy exsist ?
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Forms of polygamy\nPolygamy exists in three specific forms, including polygyny (one man having multiple wives), polyandry (one woman having multiple husbands), or group marriage (some combination of polygyny and polyandry). Historically, all three practices have been found, but polygyny is by far the most common.\n\nA notable example of polyandry occurs in Hindu culture in the Mahabharata, where the Pandavas are married to one common wife, Draupadi. Today it is almost exclusively observed in the Toda tribe of India, where it is sometimes the custom for several brothers to have one wife. In this context, the practice is intended to keep land (a precious resource in a populous country like India) from being split up amongst male heirs. Polyandry was traditionally practiced among nomadic Tibetans, where it meant two poor brothers sharing a wife.\n\nGroup marriage, or circle marriage, may exist in a number of forms, such as where more than one man and more than one woman form a single family unit, and all members of the marriage share parental responsibility for any children arising from the marriage. Another possible arrangement not thought to exist in reality, although occurring in science fiction (notably in Robert Heinlein's The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress), is the long-lived line marriage, in which deceased or departing spouses in the group are continually replaced by others, so that family property never becomes dispersed through inheritance.\n\nStrictly speaking, cohabitation involving three or more sexually-involved people does not count as polygamy unless the participants at least claim to be married.
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population control,,, money ,,, power....\n''not that I approve''
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eng_Latn
| 8,749 |
Why do most girls want to settle at metro cities and don't want their husbands' parents to live with them?
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Why do girls not want to stay with husband's parents (In laws) after marriage? Why do they want to live separately?
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Is marriage unnecessary in modern society?
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eng_Latn
| 8,750 |
How can I be a good mother?
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What makes a good mum?
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What is the hardest part about being a mother?
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eng_Latn
| 8,751 |
How would you describe today's parental mindsets and mannerisms?
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How would you describe today's parenting practices?
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How do you describe this generation?
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eng_Latn
| 8,752 |
What makes a good mother?
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What is a good mother?
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Why is your mom the best mom in the world?
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eng_Latn
| 8,753 |
Why is family important?
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Why is valuing your family important?
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What is more important in life, money or satisfaction?
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eng_Latn
| 8,754 |
What you will think of boys who left his girl because of her parents?
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What you will think of boys who left his girl because of his parents?
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What do girls think about boys?
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eng_Latn
| 8,755 |
Parents Of Students With Special Needs Face Acute Challenges
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A Richmond, Va., mother talks about working from home and losing education services for her son with autism.
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Being family often means that your kids will poke fun at you. Two young Asian-American bloggers shared the antics of their immigrant parents on their website, which spawned the book, "My Mom is a Fob: Earnest Advice in Broken English From Your Asian-American Mom." The authors, Serena Wu and Teresa Wu — no relation — share their funny stories with host Michel Martin.
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eng_Latn
| 8,756 |
Research shows parents are struggling to find time to give their full attention to their children .
Figure rises to three quarters in London and the South .
But parents spend more time with their children than their parents spent with them .
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By . Laura Clark, Education Correspondent . PUBLISHED: . 18:03 EST, 21 October 2012 . | . UPDATED: . 06:09 EST, 22 October 2012 . Distracted: Long hours means six in ten children feel they don't see enough of their mother or father . Children are growing up wishing they could spend more time with their parents, a survey suggests. Six in ten youngsters thought their parents spend too much time away from the family. One in eight parents admitted they give their children their full attention only ‘once or twice a week’. The most hard-pressed said they are never able to focus just on their child. The Family and Parenting Institute, which commissioned the survey, said the findings showed the extent to which pressures on parents’ time affect family life. The charity said British parents work longer hours than those in most European countries and are adding to their workload due to economic uncertainty. The survey findings were released to coincide with Parents’ Week, which starts today. Research firm Childwise interviewed 255 children aged six to ten and one parent of each child. It found that 59 per cent of youngsters wished they could spend more time with their mother or father – rising to three-quarters in London and the south of England. Only four in ten (42 per cent) wanted to spend more time with their friends and even fewer, seven per cent, wanted to do more with their siblings. When parents were asked how much time they spent with their children, just over half (52 per cent) said they were able to give their child their full attention at least once every day. But 13 per cent of parents could devote their full attention only ‘once or twice a week’ and two per cent never could. Parents of the oldest children, ten-year-olds, were most likely to admit being unable to give their full attention to their child more than once or twice weekly. One in five (18 per cent) said this was the level of one-to-one interaction with their children.Nearly two-thirds (64 per cent) of parents believed that the quality of time spent with children was more important than the actual amount. Bedtime story: But 13 per cent of parents admit they can only give their children their full attention once or twice a week . Despite these findings, the survey suggested that parents today spend more time with their children than their own mothers and fathers did. Dr Katherine Rake, chief executive of the Family and Parenting Institute, said: ‘Evidence shows children need dedicated time with their parents if they are to realise their potential. 'It is often the simple things that make a lasting impression on children.’ She called for parents to be given greater flexible working rights. - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - . Up to a quarter of parents want to leave their children at home when going abroad on holiday.They said breaks with their offspring were not relaxing, they could not do what they wanted and it cost more. A survey, however, revealed that as many as 78 per cent always took their offspring with them. The most popular way to keep them amused abroad was at kids' clubs. Two-thirds of 1,500 parents quizzed found things for their children to do so they could relax themselves, said travel agency www.sunshine.co.uk . Co-founder Chris Clarkson said: 'Everyone likes a bit of "me" time, but a family holiday should be exactly that: all about family.'
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With her big brown eyes and constant need for cuddles and kisses, Matilda makes every maternal fibre of my being swell. Every time I look at her - or even a picture of her - my heart fills with immeasurable love and the desire to hold her close, bury my face in hers, protect and cosset her - the normal, all-encompassing feelings of intense love and responsibility that a mother has towards her child. But Matilda is not my daughter. She is my four-year-old West Highland White terrier, and I freely admit that I love her as much as I love my 11-year-old son, William. In fact, on some occasions I love her more than him. And I don't feel a bit guilty about admitting that. My son spreads mess around the house. He has to be chided and reminded to do his homework and put away his clothes, or told off for answering back, while my dear, sweet-natured Matilda is always obedient, even-tempered and brimming with affection. Mother's best friend: Kelly Rose admits that her dog Matilda is often higher in her affection than her son . Everything I do for Matilda results in love and gratitude. Every plate of food is gulped down amid much tail-wagging and excitement; the mere mention of a walk produces yaps of joy and wet doggy kisses. By contrast, no matter how many meals I dream up for William, how many of his clothes I launder or how many times I take him swimming or to after-school clubs, I barely get a word of recognition or thanks. Before you pick up the phone to the NSPCC, you should know that I'm not alone in how I feel. A recent study revealed that dogs trigger the same parental instincts in adults as their children do. Dog-owning mums reacted with the same feelings of love and compassion to images of their pet as they did to those of their children. It comes as no surprise to me that in one part of the study, where the area of the brain that deals with facial recognition was analysed, the women responded more favourably to pictures of their canine companions than to pictures of their offspring. Different needs: While Matilda will always rely on Kelly Rose, William is becoming more independent . This resonates with me. For, much as I love my son - and I do, more than any words could express - I also love Matilda with the same drive and passion. And on occasions, those feelings of love for her do run deeper than those I have for William. After all, I'm on borrowed time with Matilda in a way I'm not with my son. With her, I have 12 or so years at best. I'm already a third of the way through, so I need to make her every moment as happy as possible. I want her never to feel unloved or unwanted. Obviously, I want my son to feel that way too. But as we have decades of fun and shared time left together, I feel that Matilda's needs now are more pressing. There is also the fact that she will always be a baby, while my son is growing up and away from me. A puppy brings out that same love that a parent feels for a newborn - a ferocious sense of idolatry combined with a need to protect and treasure. But with children that love evolves and becomes more organic, less obsessive. It doesn't change with a dog because they always need you in exactly the same way. Pampered pooch: Sometimes Matilda gets more attention than William . Home hierarchy: The dog believes she's second in line, then William . The enormous sense of responsibility I feel towards Matilda has not changed since the day I brought her home. I chose to take her from her mother, bring her into my home and make her dependent on me for ever. Unlike with William, I am not preparing her for a bigger journey. Her life begins and ends with me. It's up to me to make her happy. After all, isn't that what having a pet is all about? Shouldn't every responsible owner put their furry companion first? My role in loving, nurturing and caring for William is to ready him for the world, to make him a responsible adult and less reliant on me. And with each passing day, he is demonstrating that he needs me less and less. At 11 and a half, the signs of burgeoning independence are there. There is no more hand-holding when we are out, no kisses goodbye if anyone can see. The little boy who would spend hours snuggled up to me on the sofa sharing a book, or falling asleep with his head in my lap, is long gone. And as a single mother, I have to hand William over to his father every other weekend, so my relationship with him is punctuated by periods when he is away from me. Not so with Matilda, who never leaves my side or suffers from divided loyalties. She doesn't complain when I nuzzle my head on her belly, stroke her face lovingly or scoop her into my arms. Pupply love: Matilda gives affection in abundance . She doesn't disappear to school every day, or for playdates or football competitions. She is there at my side, wherever I am. She spends her days in my office under the desk and sleeps in my bed at night. If I tell her I have to pop out, she flattens her ears and puts her tail between her legs, and when I return she greets me as if I've been away for months. It is on those occasions - when her face is pressed into my neck, her nose cold and wet against my ear, her love for me palpable - that I really cannot imagine loving anyone or anything more. I guess a lot of it comes down to a human need to feel wanted and loved, and Matilda gives that in abundance. Children, as they grow older, do not give such physical shows of love to their parents. The feeling of being the most important person in the world to your child stops the moment they start school and realise that other people can fulfil their basic needs. And as they grow up, you fade fast from their thoughts. Sharing a parent: William can sometimes get jealous of his mother's constant canine companion . They want you out of the way when their friends are around. You are told not to interfere, not to nag. And that's tough for any mum to cope with - which is probably why, as the study bore out, so many women eventually replace their needy kids with needy dogs. It is probably why you used to see old ladies pushing dogs around in old prams. Unlike children, dogs never grow out of the need to be babied. More than one in three pet owners say they would cut back on their own food spending ahead of their pet's . Naturally, my son can resent the attention I pay Matilda and her attachment to me. He'll complain that Matilda's walks take priority over giving him a lift to his friend's house, or that her need to be fed outweighs his calls for a snack. He will become jealous when I tell him that, no, I can't get up to look at what he is doing on his computer because Matilda is asleep on my lap. And no, he can't move her off the chair nearest the TV, where he wants to sit. This doesn't go down well with everyone. A relative once berated me when I came home and greeted the dog with kisses and cuddles but forgot to acknowledge my son. Yet Matilda plays up to her role of mummy's girl in a way my child never has, and I just react to it. She is jealous of him too. On the rare occasions when my now quite strapping son plonks himself next to me on the sofa, Matilda is there in a flash, sitting between us, one paw placed possessively on my knee. If I am styling his hair or helping him with his tie, she presses herself against my legs, needing to be part of the goings-on. And I love it. Who doesn't get pleasure from feeling wanted and needed, and knowing you are the centre of someone's world? Being a pack animal, Matilda observes a hierarchy and, while she knows I am head of that pack, it is obvious that she regards herself as second in line, with William third. In my mind, though, and despite what anyone else might think, based on my love for her and the fulfilment of her needs over anyone else's, Matilda will always be first.
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eng_Latn
| 8,757 |
Asking from Doctors specially, Is ASD (Heart) is harmful after 40. Some Doctos say dont operate after 40.?
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Some ASDs depending on the size of it donot need a surgical repair as long as it doesn't affect the heart. But it is advisable to go through regular follow ups.
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~Among the Montagnard people of the central highlands, the first and third born are always male. Every female child born out of sequence is immediately smothered by the mother on delivery and the corpse is consumed by the village as part of a fertility ritual 3 days later, to aid the mother in conceiving again.\nThe first born son, on his second birthday, is taken to the forest and left for three days. The father retrieves him after the ordeal. If the child survives, he is deemed worthy to inherit the family lands and property and is raised accordingly.\nThe second son is spared this ritual unless the first son proves unworthy and dies. Assuming his brother has survived, the younger son is raised essentially as a vassal to the elder, it being the intention that he will fill his brother's sandals when the older boy dies.\nFemale children are raised basically to fulfill on of two functions. They are either beasts of burden or baby makers. The village wise men inspect female children between the ages of 8 and 18 months. Those with the proper anatomical structure deemed appropriate for conception and childbearing are pampared and have to work the rice only half days, while their sisters are groomed to work the fields, and tend to the manual labor necessary to maintain the household and village. Often, these otherwise useless children are sold to neighboring villages.\n\nChildhood games for the boys are centered around hunting and battle themes, as the boys will someday be required to provide the village with meat and defend it against attack from outsiders. By the time they are 8 years old, the boys play these "games" with real weapons, and it is far from rare that children are killed by their playmates in the course of these games. \n\nThe girls are prohibbited from playing games. They are cast into their permantent roles as soon as they learn to walk, and by the age of 5, they can be seen lugging water jugs weighing up to 25 Kg from the village water source to their homes. The 'breeders', by the age of 9, are 'instructed' by the village elders in the mechanics of reproduction.\n\nThere are many rituals and customs followed by the Montagnards, with whom my father lived for 4 years in the 60's (and one of whom he married), but due to limited space, I cannot relate them here. You should research them. They are fascinating people. My mother has become westernized to some extent, but she is appalled by the way westerners coddle their young. Dad and I have tried to convince her to write a book about her people, but she refuses to do so. To a Montagnard, sharing secrets of village life with outsiders in the past has led to the anihilation of entire villages by raiders and is taboo.
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eng_Latn
| 8,758 |
iam looking for info on past cfl player. he played for the toronto argos.also hepast away (37 years old).2006?
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Tony Antunovic died in 1997, not 2006, but he was also 37 when he died and played for Toronto. All I got for ya.
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~Among the Montagnard people of the central highlands, the first and third born are always male. Every female child born out of sequence is immediately smothered by the mother on delivery and the corpse is consumed by the village as part of a fertility ritual 3 days later, to aid the mother in conceiving again.\nThe first born son, on his second birthday, is taken to the forest and left for three days. The father retrieves him after the ordeal. If the child survives, he is deemed worthy to inherit the family lands and property and is raised accordingly.\nThe second son is spared this ritual unless the first son proves unworthy and dies. Assuming his brother has survived, the younger son is raised essentially as a vassal to the elder, it being the intention that he will fill his brother's sandals when the older boy dies.\nFemale children are raised basically to fulfill on of two functions. They are either beasts of burden or baby makers. The village wise men inspect female children between the ages of 8 and 18 months. Those with the proper anatomical structure deemed appropriate for conception and childbearing are pampared and have to work the rice only half days, while their sisters are groomed to work the fields, and tend to the manual labor necessary to maintain the household and village. Often, these otherwise useless children are sold to neighboring villages.\n\nChildhood games for the boys are centered around hunting and battle themes, as the boys will someday be required to provide the village with meat and defend it against attack from outsiders. By the time they are 8 years old, the boys play these "games" with real weapons, and it is far from rare that children are killed by their playmates in the course of these games. \n\nThe girls are prohibbited from playing games. They are cast into their permantent roles as soon as they learn to walk, and by the age of 5, they can be seen lugging water jugs weighing up to 25 Kg from the village water source to their homes. The 'breeders', by the age of 9, are 'instructed' by the village elders in the mechanics of reproduction.\n\nThere are many rituals and customs followed by the Montagnards, with whom my father lived for 4 years in the 60's (and one of whom he married), but due to limited space, I cannot relate them here. You should research them. They are fascinating people. My mother has become westernized to some extent, but she is appalled by the way westerners coddle their young. Dad and I have tried to convince her to write a book about her people, but she refuses to do so. To a Montagnard, sharing secrets of village life with outsiders in the past has led to the anihilation of entire villages by raiders and is taboo.
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eng_Latn
| 8,759 |
is it possible for a woman to marry with a man who younger than her? i'm 23 and my boyfriend is just 22yrs
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I married a man 7 years younger than I am. We have now been married for 27 years and going strong. Age is only a number. It's how you perceive that number. Love him??. Then go for it. One year difference is nothing. OH, I already had 4 kids and my husband had never been married before. My children love him like their own father. He is the most wonderful man to me. Take a chance if you love each other. It's worth it.
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~Among the Montagnard people of the central highlands, the first and third born are always male. Every female child born out of sequence is immediately smothered by the mother on delivery and the corpse is consumed by the village as part of a fertility ritual 3 days later, to aid the mother in conceiving again.\nThe first born son, on his second birthday, is taken to the forest and left for three days. The father retrieves him after the ordeal. If the child survives, he is deemed worthy to inherit the family lands and property and is raised accordingly.\nThe second son is spared this ritual unless the first son proves unworthy and dies. Assuming his brother has survived, the younger son is raised essentially as a vassal to the elder, it being the intention that he will fill his brother's sandals when the older boy dies.\nFemale children are raised basically to fulfill on of two functions. They are either beasts of burden or baby makers. The village wise men inspect female children between the ages of 8 and 18 months. Those with the proper anatomical structure deemed appropriate for conception and childbearing are pampared and have to work the rice only half days, while their sisters are groomed to work the fields, and tend to the manual labor necessary to maintain the household and village. Often, these otherwise useless children are sold to neighboring villages.\n\nChildhood games for the boys are centered around hunting and battle themes, as the boys will someday be required to provide the village with meat and defend it against attack from outsiders. By the time they are 8 years old, the boys play these "games" with real weapons, and it is far from rare that children are killed by their playmates in the course of these games. \n\nThe girls are prohibbited from playing games. They are cast into their permantent roles as soon as they learn to walk, and by the age of 5, they can be seen lugging water jugs weighing up to 25 Kg from the village water source to their homes. The 'breeders', by the age of 9, are 'instructed' by the village elders in the mechanics of reproduction.\n\nThere are many rituals and customs followed by the Montagnards, with whom my father lived for 4 years in the 60's (and one of whom he married), but due to limited space, I cannot relate them here. You should research them. They are fascinating people. My mother has become westernized to some extent, but she is appalled by the way westerners coddle their young. Dad and I have tried to convince her to write a book about her people, but she refuses to do so. To a Montagnard, sharing secrets of village life with outsiders in the past has led to the anihilation of entire villages by raiders and is taboo.
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eng_Latn
| 8,760 |
As a father of a daughter with autism, i was surprised by how little time the author contributed to the family life. More time was spent at work and then writing a book when it sounds like home would have been the place to be at this critical time for his family. He writes often about don't critize until you've walked in my shoes yet he has no problems bashing the GFCF diet which has proved helpful to many families. while written with great love for his son, i am not sure his priorities are in order.
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I find it hard to believe people fall for this stuff. He writes so much stuff that he pulls out of mid-air, supposedly based on the brain research. If you are unfortunate enough to take a class that requires this, read it carefully. He jumps to conclusions with little to no evidence to back it up. Plus, he is neither a teacher nor a neurologist. He just found something he can write about and sound like an expert. Plus the writing seems written for, we'll, let's say, young readers. Very simplistic, which is not always bad, but in this case, it is.Again, read carefully. Analyze his statements and look for the actual scientific proof for them. You will be hard-pressed to find any, either in his book or elsewhere. Total fluff.
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As a father of a daughter with autism, i was surprised by how little time the author contributed to the family life. More time was spent at work and then writing a book when it sounds like home would have been the place to be at this critical time for his family. He writes often about don't critize until you've walked in my shoes yet he has no problems bashing the GFCF diet which has proved helpful to many families. while written with great love for his son, i am not sure his priorities are in order.
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eng_Latn
| 8,761 |
this movie is, despite its "independent" status, a stupid hollywood version of a nauseating mother-daughter relationship. it wasnt that bad at first, but somewhere during the course of the movie--around the time that the daughter goes out with that guy, i think--it turns into a cheesey mother-daughter bonding movie. im sorry, but i dont know of any mothers who have that kind of relationship with their daughter...its probably better that way, though.
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i should love this movie . the acting is very good and Barbara Stanwyck is great but the the movie has always seemed very trite to me . the movie makes working class people look low and cheap .the fact that the daughter is ashamed of her mother and that the daughter does not rise above it has always made me a bit uneasy . Barbara Stanwyck as the mother worships the daughter but the daughter forgoes a mothers love to find happiness with her well to do fathers family . i wonder how many others who have seen this film feel this way about it.again the acting was very very good and worth watching . i really don't like the story line . just a personal preference .thank you
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this movie is, despite its "independent" status, a stupid hollywood version of a nauseating mother-daughter relationship. it wasnt that bad at first, but somewhere during the course of the movie--around the time that the daughter goes out with that guy, i think--it turns into a cheesey mother-daughter bonding movie. im sorry, but i dont know of any mothers who have that kind of relationship with their daughter...its probably better that way, though.
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eng_Latn
| 8,762 |
What type of family was your typical Han era family considered to be?
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The Han-era family was patrilineal and typically had four to five nuclear family members living in one household. Multiple generations of extended family members did not occupy the same house, unlike families of later dynasties. According to Confucian family norms, various family members were treated with different levels of respect and intimacy. For example, there were different accepted time frames for mourning the death of a father versus a paternal uncle. Arranged marriages were normal, with the father's input on his offspring's spouse being considered more important than the mother's. Monogamous marriages were also normal, although nobles and high officials were wealthy enough to afford and support concubines as additional lovers. Under certain conditions dictated by custom, not law, both men and women were able to divorce their spouses and remarry.
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Hunting-gathering was the common human mode of subsistence throughout the Paleolithic, but the observation of current-day hunters and gatherers does not necessarily reflect Paleolithic societies; the hunter-gatherer cultures examined today have had much contact with modern civilization and do not represent "pristine" conditions found in uncontacted peoples.
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eng_Latn
| 8,763 |
What is the term for a pregnant slave?
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Due to the patriarchal nature of Arab society, Arab men, including during the slave trade in North Africa, enslaved more black women than men. They used more black female slaves in domestic service and agriculture than males. The men interpreted the Qur'an to permit sexual relations between a male master and his female slave outside of marriage (see Ma malakat aymanukum and sex), leading to many mixed-race children. When an enslaved woman became pregnant with her Arab master's child, she was considered as umm walad or "mother of a child", a status that granted her privileged rights. The child was given rights of inheritance to the father's property, so mixed-race children could share in any wealth of the father. Because the society was patrilineal, the children took their fathers' social status at birth and were born free.
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As the School grew, more students were allowed to attend provided that they paid their own fees and lived in the town, outside the College's original buildings. These students became known as Oppidans, from the Latin word oppidum, meaning town. The Houses developed over time as a means of providing residence for the Oppidans in a more congenial manner, and during the 18th and 19th centuries were mostly run by women known as "dames". They typically contain about fifty boys. Although classes are organised on a School basis, most boys spend a large proportion of their time in their House. Each House has a formal name, mainly used for post and people outside the Eton community. It is generally known by the boys by the initials or surname of the House Master, the teacher who lives in the house and manages the pupils in it.
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eng_Latn
| 8,764 |
"the natureof men is always same,it is their habit which seprates them"
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A child's first inclination is towards its mother, being totally dependent to her. This humility and submissive nature is the same. As the child grows up, his experiences with the culture around him has great influence on him. This includes parents and family, friends, and the society.
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De igual manera(literal translation)...the final version would sound something like this: De igual manera, todos los hombres norteamericanos son precavidos/cuidadosos en/hasta cierto grado.
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eng_Latn
| 8,765 |
In the Weather Channel, it says that Manila is having a rainstorm. Today. But really, here in The Philippines (where I live.) it is summer vacation. Also in Manila. Why?
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Hey! we cant always be right all time
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It's the motherland. Since most of the Phillippines is 90% Catholic, their attiudes are strict. Old school stuff. Like they grew up with values from the middle ages. Most "flip" parents are like that due to strong family ties. That also means that your parents (like some of my other cousin's parents) are highly competitive and love to show off. Whether it would be material or unfortunately their own flesh and blood. Sad, but true, little "flip" sister. In their eyes, they're looking out for what's "best" for you. Be careful, though. They will hate the idea of going outside the "flip" circle if you end up dating sometime.
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eng_Latn
| 8,766 |
why the amount of hemoglobin in male is higher than in female?
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Menstruation or perhaps because evolutionary wise, mean had to take in more oxygen to run after and kill the food.\n\nGreat question. I'd go with the monthly answer though, just makes more sense, I have 2 sisters that are borderline anemic and none of my brothers are. So, I'd say it was they're periods.
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I take great pride in my ability to do many things,(e.i. breaking and training horses <sometimes ones never been handled>, obedience training unruly dogs, driving 18 wheelers, operator heavy equipment, major carpentry work, professional painter, plumbing, auto mechanics, won trophies in marksmanship and in horse show competitions, etc.) But I've learned every bit of this from different men (7 brothers, 4 uncles, father, and a husband.) And I've not let it all go to my head to the point that I believe I'm better at these things than every man, because I'm not. I think your ability to do certain things better depends on the individual's desire to be the best they can be and if they had a good instuctor to teach them, not a sex.
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eng_Latn
| 8,767 |
How do Jedi ensure there are ample supply of future Jedi given that Jedi are forbidden to marry?
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If mastery of the Force is hereditary, how are the Jedi so numerous?
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Why did the Resistance automatically assume the use of this tech in The Last Jedi?
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eng_Latn
| 8,768 |
Boy's date of birth 30th nov. 1971; 23:50 hours place : delhi
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There seems to be a lot of activity in the 4th house area of your chart, throughout your life. This includes the home, family, mother, women, land, farms, property, houses, food, cooking, restaurants, homeland, heritage, ancestors, mines and mining.\n\nYour personality, career, money, partners or spouse, legal matters, sacrifices or debts, are all tied up with your home, house and family in some way. Perhaps also, your mother is a strong influence in your family, or your family may be powerful or prominent.\n\nYour career may involve one or more of the following: communications, transportation, speaking, writing, publishing, news, information, education, schools, neighbourhoods, trading, business, property, land, farms, agriculture, mines, government, buildings, municipal services, corporations, finances.\n\nHowever, Saturn gives you heavy responsibilities and restrictions regarding home and family. There is also conflict between your career and work on the one hand, and your home and family on the other.\n\nYou have good earning power, and can become very wealthy. Your means of income may be connected to one or more of the following, females, fashion, beauty, design, the arts, diplomacy, legal matters, entertainment, leisure, speculation, drama, theatres, children, creative activities, business, banking, insurance.\n\nYou will own houses and land in your lifetime. You will also own cars, maybe even boats. Although you may own property, there will be problems with mortgages, loans, family disputes, and legal wranglings.\n\nYou will probably marry someone from your hometown or country. It may be an arranged marriage, or there is some involvement of your family. Your spouse will be a Pisces type - she may have Sun, Moon, Ascendant or Midheaven in Pisces, or she may be an artist, musician, religious or spiritual person, or may work in hospitals, charities or temples. Your wife may be wealthy herself. The relationship will not be smooth. There is a possibility you may have an affair outside of marriage.\n\nYour children will grow up to be powerful or prominent. You are likely to have only 1 child. You probably like gambling, though you don't have much luck in this area.\n\nYour investments generally go well. You may receive or inherit wealth from your mother or her side of the family. Legal matters may present some problems, which are likely to be in connection with partner's money, inheritances, taxes and certain family members.\n\nYou will have powerful friends among professionals, teachers, academics, officials, religious people, legal people, publishers, foreigners. They will be able to help you with your professional as well as personal problems.\n\nYour secret enemies are local leaders, community leaders, heads, people of rank or position, your superiors or bosses. They may interfere in your life, and cause trouble for you in the home and family, and even in your marriage.\n\nThe above are general forecasts for your future. As it takes too long to do detailed predictions and timings, I have left that out. You may consult a professional astrologer for details.\n\nGood luck!\n.
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Why are you too much bothered about the future of a hardly month old child?? Is it because that the Sun is debilitated and Sun Maha Dasha in operation???\n\nThe child has Jupiter in his Raashi and also has a good Chandraadhi Yoga --meaning all the malefic Yoga (if any in the Chart) will get nullified. \n\nSee the horoscope only after the child reaches its 8th age!
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eng_Latn
| 8,769 |
I asked this question but I would like to get answers that relate to family life. Such as: how often do you need to go to church, is Christmas Dec. 25, do they both pray the rosary/litany, is Mary and the saints important, how is lent and easter celebrated. Do both have the same ten commandments? You get the idea.
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Very similar. Greek Orthodoxy is a national church. Catholicism is more universal in its leadership an application of faith. Calendars for feast days do differ at times. Prayers, saints, liturgies are similar.
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You can find information and pass information on here. You can talk to friends with same/similiar interests as you on Myspace. It all depends on what you're looking for.
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eng_Latn
| 8,770 |
how did literature affect family life in 1920s
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The difference between the family of today and the family of the 1920s is respect, for tradition, for other people, and for themselves. In the '20s, families were far more tight-knit. Children grew up close to their parents and their family's traditions.eople purchased many products. People accepted poverty. Women were not equal with men. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Family life in the 20s was nothing like the person above said. There was a heavier emphasis on the nuclear family, i.e. the married couple and their children.
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Why were movies and radio entertainment so important during the 1920s? gave people a break from a rough life, something to enjoy/be happy about, also saw they weren't alone/only one struggling. Radio gave people family time and fireside chats let people see how gov't carried and worked for them.
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eng_Latn
| 8,771 |
Gender Norms Around Boys Are Ingrained In Us When We're Young, But There Are Ways To Unlearn Them
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A series of crimes attributed to misogyny, including the recent van attack in Toronto in which 10 people died, has raised concerns about toxic masculinity and the ways in which our societal norms around what it means to be a man can become dangerous.
And if you have a young boy in your life, you know those norms are there to contend with from birth. Clothing marketed to even the smallest baby boys is full of gendered stereotypes, such as images and words that call them heroes, hunks or tough guys.
And work by neuroscientist Lise Eliot has looked at the way we treat boy and girl babies differently even before they express their personalities, or even unconsciously change our own behaviour around children to fit established gender norms.
"I think the thing we forget when we talk about gender and masculinity is that these are concepts that adults and parents actively teach our kids," Lanae St. John, a sexologist and a mother of two teen boys, told HuffPost Canada by email.
"At worst, kids socialize — a polite word for bully, cajole, taunt, tease, etc. — each other to conform to certain behaviours contained within 'gender roles' because of what adults and others taught them," St. John said.
Limiting your child's behaviour because they identify as a boy is just as damaging as doing the same to a girl, or to a child who identifies as someone else on the gender spectrum.
"By limiting socially acceptable emotions in males, we are stunting their emotional growth and limiting their ability to have a full and engaged life," author Lisa Orban told HuffPost Canada by email.
"We are setting them up for failure in relationships by not allowing them to connect with other human beings except in superficial ways, denying males close and supportive friendships, and leaving them unable to express themselves with loved ones."
How can adults work against norms that are deeply ingrained not just in our own minds, but in the society we all live in? There are ways to do it — and that work matters because it all has the end goal of helping young boys be more comfortable with who they really are, and who the people around them really are.
Look at yourself
One of the best things we can do as adults is to work on ourselves first, St. John said. What do you think about when the topic of gender comes up? What does it mean to you to "be a man"? What messages did we learn ourselves growing up?
Think about what your reactions are like, and work on those, she said. That will help you do the same with the boys in your life. There are resources out there to help you do that, including the books Boys: What It Means to Become a Man by Rachel Giese and Gender: Your Guide by Lee Airton.
Pay attention to words
A lot of the societal norms around gender, including masculinity, are reinforced in the way we talk — including how we talk about how we feel. Not giving our emotions gender assignments is a good place to start in broadening the scope of what masculinity looks like for boys, Orban said. Think of phrases like, "Man up" or "Don't be a pussy" or "Big boys don't cry."
"We all know real men do cry, it's healthy to cry, and repressing our emotions can have lifelong emotional, and even physical, tolls on our bodies," she said. "Instead, we should be encouraging a healthy acknowledgment of feelings and ways to cope with them when they become overwhelming, the same way we do with girls."
Let them ask questions
Make sure the boys in your life are able to ask you questions about masculinity and gender without ridicule or criticism, counsellor GinaMarie Guarino told HuffPost Canada by email.
"Children have many questions, and when they feel they cannot ask the questions, they reject the idea to challenge norms," Guarino said. "Being able to talk about their thoughts and feelings are a great way to help a child unlearn the traditional definition of masculinity."
Remember that a lot of this is new
"I guess I have lots of questions and not many answers because this is new terrain," St. John said. Gender is one of the foundations upon which we build our sense of self, she said, and it can make people uncomfortable to see that shift.
Take the time to learn and be open to the fact that norms, advice, and best practices around this may change — just as your own child's needs and beliefs about gender and masculinity also could.
Let people be who they are
"One of the best things you can do to break down the stigma and expectations that come with traditional masculinity is to teach unconditional tolerance," Guarino said.
Teach children to celebrate differences instead of seeing them as a source of threat or confusion, she said, and it will be more natural for them to broaden their definition of masculinity — or femininity, or anything else.
Also on HuffPost:
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The national inflation rate was up a mere 1.5 per cent at the end of last year, and yet a recent report from Bank of Nova Scotia pegged the rate of price increases for cars and trucks at 5 to 6 per cent in the latter half of 2016.
A recent edition of this newsletter featured a blogger arguing that buying new vehicles is killing our finances. Since then, a few insights have emerged to provide some context for this trend. Price increases are part of it, and so is a change in buying patterns. Premium-priced trucks and SUVs are taking market share away from cars. Last year, vehicles sales in Canada reached a record high thanks in large part to SUVs and pickup trucks.
Buying cheaper vehicles is one solution, but so is taking a smarter approach to buying. Here’s an article demonstrating how zero per cent financing can actually cost you more when buying some vehicles. The reason is that you miss out on certain discounts or incentives that would otherwise be available.
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How to read financial news headlines
Common sense commentary on how to interpret the kinds of headlines you see all the time in coverage of investment and the markets.
Should I contribute to my TFSA or RRSP?
A balanced answer to this commonly asked question.
Why your adult kids are still living at home
It’s all explained in this chart about how young people are increasingly finding part time jobs instead of full-time work.
The problem with teaching financial literacy in schools
Parents tell me all the time that the best way to help young people be financially literate is to teach personal finance in schools. But here’s a story from Quebec on teachers saying that content for a high school personal finance course is being provided by the financial industry.
The business of university fees
A blogger tallies up the fees universities charge beyond tuition. Unless you have a kid in university, you won’t believe the list of fees charged by the school his daughter attends.
BMO beats all
In an increasingly online world, it’s crucial to be able to get information from your bank by e-mail, social media or online. How do banks and credit unions stack up responding to inquiries sent electronically? In this survey, Bank of Montreal topped a list of 26 financial institutions.
Today’s featured financial tool Chartered Professional Accounts Canada has published a book on how to survive the loss of a job.
Ask Rob The question: “I am considering borrowing against my home equity and investing in high quality dividend securities. My hope is that the portfolio will grow faster than the interest I pay on the home line while still experiencing appreciation on my home. Is this a sound investment strategy for someone who in in their 30s, has no RRSPs and has a steady job?”
My reply: “The numbers can certainly make sense for this type of investment plan, but remember to consider the emotional side of things. If we see a major stock market correction, dividend stocks would not be immune. If interest rates rise, we could see many dividend stocks falling in price. I’m more open to doing this sort of thing after a big market decline than after the kind of run-up we’ve seen for dividend stocks in the past five or so years. Note: On your taxes, you can claim interest paid on the line of credit if you use the money to buy investments that generate investment income like dividends.”
Do you have a question for me? Send it my way. Sorry I can’t answer every one personally. Questions and answers are edited for length.
What I’ve been writing about
Ottawa may eye tax measures that hit high earners
A guide to naming a beneficiary of your TFSA, RRSP, RRIF
Asking Canadians to delay their CPP benefits? Good luck
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eng_Latn
| 8,772 |
This Filipino Dish Is So Good It Might Make You Sing
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Cooking wasn't a matter of choice for Wilma Consul when she was growing up. Raised in the Philippines, she lost her father when she was 5 years old. A couple of years later, her mother, working long hours to provide for her four children, entrusted her second-born with the task of cooking for the family. "My sister had to go to school full day," recalls Consul. She and her two younger brothers went to school in the afternoon. "I was left in the morning to do all the rice cooking, going to the market and basically cooking for the whole family." Every morning, Consul went to the market to buy the ground meat, tomatoes and other ingredients for a dish called Ginisang Giniling (the Filipino name for picadillo, a Spanish dish that migrated to many former colonies). Jump to the recipe. It was a simple dish with sautéed meat that her mother had taught her to make. She'd cook it up for lunch for her brothers and herself, and there'd be leftovers for dinner. The circumstances that led Consul to step into the kitchen as a little girl were unusual — her father's early death. But, she says, girls in the Philippines typically learn to cook early on. And Consul's chores weren't confined to the kitchen. She took on housework as well. Her sister would help — but not her younger brothers. Her experience is pretty much the norm for girls globally. According to a 2016 UNICEF report, girls age five to 14 spend between four to nine hours a week helping their parents with housework — 40 percent more time than boys their age. Cooking and cleaning the house seems to be the most common chore — two-thirds of girls do this. The next most common chores are shopping for the household, fetching water or firewood, washing clothes and caring for siblings. "It's a universal reality," says Claudia Cappa, a senior statistics specialist with UNICEF and an author of the report. But "it is more prevalent in the developing world." This gender gap is especially stark in three African countries – Somalia, Ethiopia and Rwanda were cited as having the highest involvement of girls in household chores: more than half of girls age five to 14 spend at least two hours a day on household chores. "We disproportionately burden girls," says Anita Raj, director of the Center on Gender Equity and Health at the University of California San Diego. This largely stems from the fact that children's roles often mirror gender roles in their families, says Raj: "Girls go off with the mothers for what the mothers are doing. And boys go off with the father." In most countries, "women do greater loads of domestic labor." So their daughters follow suit. This kind of early gender divide in the house has long term negative impacts on girls. "This time [spent doing housework] is taking them away from schoolwork and socializing with other girls and thinking about their future," says Cappa. Consul can relate to that. She is proud to have helped her mother — a single mother, struggling to provide for four children. But Consul resented it at the time. "I just wanted to play," she says. Despite her daily burden of housework, Consul says she excelled at school. And her accomplishments made her mother proud. But many parents in developing countries don't care about their daughters' academic achievements. They just want them to marry and raise a family. Household chores prepare them for that, says Cappa. "Girls are pushed to think that this is the role they have in their family, this is what they are meant to do," she says. That is why in many countries, girls drop out of school at the secondary level. "If families think that there is no value of girls attending school, they make decision to take girls out of school," says Cappa. For Consul, that wasn't the case. In fact, she says her mother put a priority on education. Despite the family's financial hardships, she sent her daughters and sons to private school to make sure they would all be able to find jobs and be independent. And they did, including Consul. After the family moved to the United States, Consul earned a master's degree in journalism and later went to culinary school. Consul, now 52, splits her time between working as a journalist and a personal chef. When she cooks for herself, she often makes picadillo, the dish she cooked as a little girl. "It's kind of my go-to comfort food," she says. And with her mother now gone, too, the dish reminds her of home and of "taking care of her family," she says. "I love this dish a lot. It combines my childhood and my culinary vision of how to eat something healthy, without sacrificing the traditional taste." Someday, she wants to teach her mother's picadillo recipe to her niece and two nephews, who are in their teens and early 20s and live in California. "It's something Filipino, it's easy [to cook]," she says. "And it will be something they have from their Lola, their grandmother." Picadillo (Ginisang Giniling) This recipe is courtesy of Wilma Consul. She calls it her "healthy
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A couple of weeks ago, on the All Songs Considered blog, we asked listeners to tell us about their favorite bands, especially lesser-known groups. The response was overwhelming. We got hundreds of band and artist names and the vast majority of them were ones we'd never even heard of. On this edition of All Songs Considered we play some of the standouts, including music from the London-based rock group Fanfarlo, lo-fi singer-songwriter The Blow, the Australian dream pop group Augie March and more. Download this show in the All Songs Considered podcast. Sign up for the All Songs Considered newsletter and we'll tell you when new music features are available on the site. Register with the NPR.org community to join in our discussions. Contact us with your questions and comments.
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eng_Latn
| 8,773 |
how to create child A from child B and cast to Parent?
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Resolve build errors due to circular dependency amongst classes
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Winter 18 does not get values from a parent record
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eng_Latn
| 8,774 |
Okay, why do you all gang up on Paris, Nicky, and Nicole? They are my role models! Stop hatin'!?
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the fact that they are the role models to our children today is the very reason "we" gang up on them...they aren't anything I want my children looking up to....dressing sleazy, having too many boyfriends, drinking in excess, basically "famed" only because of their blood line and not because of something they themselves contribute to society...it is just sad that this is what our girls have to look up to now is all....
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We had a natural disaster. We learned for a period. And then we went back to our normal habits. We had a terrorist attack. We learned for a period and went right back to our old habits. Some one said to set an example. And she is right. If we do as we want to be treated its a start. Teach our children these same values its a start. If we think we a disposable, then we will be treated as such. If we think we are replacable, then we will be. See what I mean. Examples and behavior is the key. Its slow in coming but its the best we have. Disasters dont teach us perminantly to change. It takes patience.
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eng_Latn
| 8,775 |
Improve Your Family Relationships (Kids)
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Do you want to help keep your family together and bonded? Being an active and positive member of your family takes a little effort. By making time for your family members and working on your relationships, you can help improve the atmosphere for everyone.
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Do you like Sims 2? Do you like the Baby-sitters Club? Then make the Kishi family from the book series on Sims 2!
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eng_Latn
| 8,776 |
what is people factor
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The People Factor is his solution. God works in our lives through our relationships. Yet, all too often, we get our relationship advice from the most toxic sources we can find. The People Factor is based on the most effective, trustworthy relationship book of all time: the Bible. If you hunger for a richer, more fulfilling life, your Relational IQ is the place to start. If you put The People Factor principles to work, you will become stronger, happier, and healthier in all your relationships. You will be a better spouse, a better friend, a better boss, a better parent, and a better person.
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1 Usually, in an item by people matrix, factors are selected by grouping related items. 2 In the Q factor analysis technique, the matrix is transposed and factors are created by grouping related people: For example, liberals, libertarians, conservatives and socialists, could form separate groups.
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eng_Latn
| 8,777 |
Differences in Perceived Parenting Style Between Mothers and Fathers: Implications for Child Outcomes and Marital Conflict
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self - determination theory and the facilitation of intrinsic motivation , social development , and well - being .
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Internet of Things and LoRa™ Low-Power Wide-Area Networks: A survey
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eng_Latn
| 8,778 |
Parents’ Intelligence Mindsets Relate to Child Internalizing Problems: Moderation Through Child Gender
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Praise for intelligence can undermine children's motivation and performance.
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FlopCoin: A Cryptocurrency for Computation Offloading
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eng_Latn
| 8,779 |
Good genes, complementary genes and human mate preferences
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Gender differences in mate selection preferences: a test of the parental investment model.
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Using Kibana and ElasticSearch for the Recommendation of Job Offers to Students
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eng_Latn
| 8,780 |
not at the dinner table : parents ¿ and children ¿ s perspectives on family technology rules .
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Social network activity and social well-being
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Stress, social support, and the buffering hypothesis
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eng_Latn
| 8,781 |
Maximizing and Satisficing in Decision-Making Dyads
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individual differences in adult decision - making competence .
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Directionality of Person-Situation Transactions: Are There Spillovers Among and Between Situation Experiences And Personality States?
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eng_Latn
| 8,782 |
Impact of Parent’s Occupation and Family Income on Children’s Performance
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The Effects Of Parental Socio-Economic Status On Academic Performance Of Students In Selected Schools In Edu Lga Of Kwara State, Nigeria
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Soul Catchers: The Material Culture of the Mind Sciences
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eng_Latn
| 8,783 |
The Relationship between Parenting Styles and Adolescents’ Social Anxiety in Migrant Families: A Study in Guangdong, China
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Adolescent Development
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traffic sign classification using hough transform and svm .
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eng_Latn
| 8,784 |
Impact of Parent’s Occupation and Family Income on Children’s Performance
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FACTORS AFFECTING STUDENTS ’ QUALITY OF ACADEMIC PERFORMANCE : A CASE OF SECONDARY
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DBPal: A Learned NL-Interface for Databases
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eng_Latn
| 8,785 |
Job Characteristics as Antecedents of Intention to Stay and Mediating Effects of Work Family Facilitation and Family Satisfaction among Single Mothers in Malaysia
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Perceived Organizational Support: A Review of the Literature
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SOCS-1, a negative regulator of the JAK/STAT pathway, is silenced by methylation in human hepatocellular carcinoma and shows growth-suppression activity
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eng_Latn
| 8,786 |
A COMPARATIVE STUDY OF THE DIFFERENCES IN FAMILY COMMUNICATION AMONG YOUNG URBAN ADULT CONSUMERS AND THE DEVELOPMENT OF THEIR MATERIALISTIC VALUES: A DISCRIMINANT ANALYSIS
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Interpersonal influences on adolescent materialism: A new look at the role of parents and peers
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Exploratory Gradient Boosting for Reinforcement Learning in Complex Domains
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yue_Hant
| 8,787 |
An online growth mindset intervention in a sample of rural adolescent girls
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Why do women opt out? Sense of belonging and women's representation in mathematics.
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Towards a Financial Fraud Ontology: A Legal Modelling Approach
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eng_Latn
| 8,788 |
An evolutionary trust game for the sharing economy
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Monetizing Network Hospitality: Hospitality and Sociability in the Context of Airbnb
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Stress and Family Satisfaction in Parents of Children with Facial Port-Wine Stains
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eng_Latn
| 8,789 |
mothers ' daily person and process praise : implications for children ' s theory of intelligence and motivation .
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self - determination theory and the facilitation of intrinsic motivation , social development , and well - being .
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Face recognition based on convolutional neural network
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eng_Latn
| 8,790 |
What do you call the home in which you grew up and spent most of your childhood: father home, mother home or what?
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A word/phrase meaning the "house where I was born"?
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RemoveDuplicates gives 1004 error
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eng_Latn
| 8,791 |
what are some family and consumer sciences
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AAFCS is the only professional association for family and consumer sciences (FCS) students and professionals from both multiple practice settings and content areas. Our members are educators, administrators and managers, human service and business professionals, researchers, community volunteers, and consultants.
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Insider Info. Family and consumer sciences teachers (also called home economics teachers) teach subjects such as nutrition, budgeting, cooking, family living, sewing, child care, fashion design and many others. They work in school settings and have regular classes of 60 to 75 minutes each.
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eng_Latn
| 8,792 |
bowlby's attachment theory definition
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Attachment is an emotional bond to another person. Bowlby believed that the earliest bonds formed by children with their caregivers have a tremendous impact that continues throughout life. He suggested attachment also serves to keep the infant close to the mother, thus improving the child's chances of survival.
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Digby's general theory thus represents a strange mixture of epigenesis and pangenesis, and is not entirely devoid of virtues. Medical Investigation in Seventeenth Century England Charles W. Bodemer
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eng_Latn
| 8,793 |
what is family structural theory
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The structural theory sees the family as an integrated whole. Therefore, the emphasis should be contextual problems and solutions rather than an individual. It focuses on family interactions to understand the structure or organization of the family.
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gender history families boundaries patterns father. One of the central premises of family systems theory is that family systems organize themselves to carry out the daily challenges and tasks of life, as well as adjusting to the developmental needs of its members. Critical to this premise is the concept of holism.
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eng_Latn
| 8,794 |
what does a theoretical model/treatment mean
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While Family Centered Treatment integrates elements of several evidence-based theoretical models, two in particular form its foundation: Eco-Structural Family Therapy and Emotionally Focused Therapy.
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theoretical foundations meaning, theoretical foundations definition | English Cobuild dictionary. theoretical. 1 adj A theoretical study or explanation is based on or uses the ideas and abstract principles that relate to a particular subject, rather than the practical aspects or uses of it. ...theoretical physics.
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eng_Latn
| 8,795 |
what is attachment for mothers
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For parents and particularly for mothers, attachment parenting is more strenuous and demanding than most other present-day ways of parenting, placing high responsibility on them without allowing for a support network of helpful friends or family. William Sears is fully aware of the arduousness of the methods.
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Attachment parenting is only one of many responsiveness and love oriented parenting philosophies that entered the pedagogical mainstream after World War II, and it owes many of its ideas to older teachings, such as Benjamin Spock's influential handbook Baby and Child Care (1946).
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eng_Latn
| 8,796 |
what is attachment
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home / study / social sciences / psychology definitions / attachment. Attachment is a strong emotional connection, such as the bond between a child and caregiver. In psychology, the concept of attachment helps explain development and personality. In the 1950s, research by Harry Harlow suggested that baby monkeys (and, analogously, human infants) desire not merely to be fed but to connect emotionally with a caregiver.
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By Kendra Cherry. Updated June 14, 2016. Attachment theory is focused on the relationships and bonds between people, particularly long-term relationships including those between a parent and child and between romantic partners.
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eng_Latn
| 8,797 |
family consumer definition
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A Home Economics instructor giving a demonstration, Seattle, 1953. Family and consumer sciences (FCS) is the profession and field of study that deals with the economics and management of the home and community. It is also known as home economics or home science (depending on the country).
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Family literacy is a term used to describe parents and children-or more broadly-adults and children-learning together.
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eng_Latn
| 8,798 |
meanings behind the giver
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Family and Relationships (Parental) -- In The Giver, each family has two parents, a son, and a daughter. The relationships are not biological, but are developed through observation and a careful handling of personality. In our own society, the make up of family is under discussion.
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What is the setting of the book The Giver? 2 educator answers; In the book The Giver by Lois Lowry, what rules does the community have? 2 educator answers; What happens at each age in the book The Giver? 1 educator answer; What are some character traits of Jonas in The Giver? 2 educator answers; More The Giver Questions »
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eng_Latn
| 8,799 |
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