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The consideration of oneself. I like to be afraid. You like to be afraid.
Now, if you like to be afraid, keep it and don't talk about it. (Laughter) But if you want to investigate what is the root of fear - please you haven't done it. You are just talking round it.
It's because we don't know. What do we have to do? I am going to show it to you sir, you haven't even the patience to listen.
(Inaudible) (Repeating) I want my desires to be fulfilled, I want my demands satisfied, and because they do not I get afraid, I get - all the rest of it. I want to find out, because I am a serious man, I want to find out why there are so many fears I have, conscious as well as unconscious - losing a job, public opinion, being crippled physically, afraid of death, afraid of my wife or husband, afraid of life, afraid of so many, many things. I am asking myself, why is there this fear, what is the central factor of it?
Right? Please, one moment. I am asking, madam, I am investigating myself, so please I am trying to show how to investigate.
My mind says, I know I am afraid - I am afraid of water, darkness, I am afraid of somebody, I am afraid of having told a lie being discovered, I want to be tall, beautiful, and I am not, I am afraid. I am investigating. So I have got many, many, many fears.
Just a minute. I know there are deep fears which I have not even looked at, there are superficial fears. Now I want to find out the fears, both that are hidden and open, I want to find out how they exist, how they come into being, what is the root of it.
Just a minute. Now how does one find out? I am going step by step into it.
How does one find out? I can only find out if the mind sees that to live in fear is not only neurotic, but it's very, very destructive. Right?
The mind must see that first, that it is neurotic and therefore neurotic activity will go on, destructive, and a mind that is frightened is never honest, a mind that is frightened will invent any experience, anything to hold on to. So I must first see the necessity clearly, wholly, that as long as there is fear there must be misery. Right?
Now do you see that? That is the first requisite. That is the first truth, that as long as there is fear there is darkness, and whatever I do in that darkness is still darkness, is still confusion.
Do I see that very clearly, wholly, not partially? One accepts it. There is no acceptance, sir.
What - accepting I live in darkness? All right, accept and live in it. Wherever you go you are carrying the darkness, so live in the darkness.
Be satisfied with it. Don't then enquire. There is a higher state.
A higher state of darkness? (Laughter) From darkness to light. You see again this contradiction, darkness to light, which is a contradiction.
So sir, please. I am trying to investigate, and you are trying to prevent it - showing it to you. It is analysis.
I said to you, it is not analysis, please sir, do listen to what the poor chap has to say. He says, I know, I am aware, I am conscious that I have got many fears, hidden and superficial, physical and others, psychological. And I know also as long as I live within that area there must be confusion.
And do what I will I cannot clear that confusion till there is freedom from fear. That is obvious. Now that is very clear to me.
Then I say to myself, I see the truth that as long as there is fear I must live in darkness - I may call it light, I'll go beyond it, but I still carry on that fear. Now the next step is - not analysis, observation only - is the mind capable of examining? You understand?
Is my mind capable of examination, observation? Let's stick to observation, it is better than examination - examination has a different meaning and observation has another meaning. Is my mind capable, realising that as long as fear exists there must be darkness, and is my mind capable of observing what that fear is, and the depth of that fear?
Observing. Now, wait a minute. What does it mean to observe?
Right? Can I observe the whole movement of fear, or only partial? You understand my question?
Can the mind observe the whole nature, structure, function and the movement of fear - the whole of it, not just bits of it? I mean by the whole, not wanting to go beyond fear, because then I have a direction, I have a motive, therefore where there is a motive, there is a direction, I cannot possibly see the whole. Right?
And I cannot possibly see the whole, observe, if there is any kind of desire to go beyond, rationalise, can I observe without any movement of thought? Do listen to this. If I observe fear through the movement of thought, then it is partial, it is obscured, it is not clear.
So can I observe this fear, all of it, without the movement of thought? Don't jump at anything. We are just observing, we are not analysing, we are just observing this extraordinarily complicated map of fear.
When you look at the map of fear if you have any direction you are only looking at it partially. That's clear. When you want to go beyond fear you are not looking at the map.
So can you look at the map of fear without any movement of thought? Don't answer, take time. That means, can thought end when I am observing?
When the mind is observing can thought be silent? Then you will ask how is thought to be silent? Right?
That's a wrong question. My concern now is to observe, and that observation is prevented when there is any movement, or flutter of thought, any wave of thought. So my attention - please listen to this - my attention is given totally to the map and therefore thought doesn't enter into it.
When I am looking at you completely nothing outside exists. You understand? So can I look at this map of fear without the wave of thought?
(Inaudible) (Repeating) Each time there is the surgence of fear I realise spontaneity ceases, and so he is asking the same thing in different words - is thought the reason of fear? I want to look at the map of fear and thought is always interfering with it - I am afraid not to look, I like being afraid, I like having a neurotic activity and so on and so on, on. So thought is always precipitating itself, percolating when I am observing.
Right? So I say to myself, can thought stop? And if it stops, what takes place?
You understand? So my question is, can it stop, not what takes place afterwards, but can it stop, voluntarily, without conflict - if there is a conflict, again the same problem. So can thought come to an end?
Have you followed this so far? Are you doing it? (Inaudible) No, does your thought come to an end, not what happens afterwards.
You are all so... You are asking us if thought can end. It is seen that there is a jolt to the body... No, sir, do listen, sir. I want to look at this map of fear, the whole of it, not just one end of it, or one part of it, or one branch of it.
I want to look at this whole phenomenon of fear which you have kindly exposed to me. And I somehow can't observe, I can't keep my eyes totally on it because something is distracting all the time. The distraction is the movement of thought, (noise of train) or the sensation of that noise, or somebody on the telephone.
So I am saying, to look at the whole width of that map of fear, the depth and the width and the height of that fear, thought must be in abeyance - right? - because thought is dividing - it says to me, 'Look there, don't look there' - right? - 'This is good, this is bad, this is the way out of it'.
So thought is always interfering, so I say to myself, can thought quietly go to sleep for the time being? And it can't. Wait.
I am going into it. It can't, it is so vibrant, it is so chattering, it is so alive. Right?
So what is the mind to do, knowing - please listen - knowing that thought interferes in the total perception? Right? And inevitably I must understand, observe, the total movement of thought - right?
- not fear - right? - but the total content of thought. You follow, sir, what has happened?
I started out by asking, why am I afraid of death, of public opinion, of this attachment; why are there so many, many fears the mind is caught in? And I am observing that, this whole field of fear, and the observation is prevented by thought, by the movement of thought. So now my attention is given to the understanding of thought - right?
- not of fear. Are you moving with me? Now I want to find out, what is thought, why does thought interfere in everything I do - sexually, morally, religiously, every movement is there, of thought, why?
Is it that the culture, religion, all the activities and education say, thought is the most important thing? Right? All the books, encyclopaedic knowledge, everything seems to have its root in thought.
Right? When I say, 'I love you', the very expression itself has its root in thought. Right?
Not the feeling, not the factor of love, but the expression of it, the verbalisation of that fact is the movement of thought - right? - my gods, my desire to be noble, my desire to have great success, my ambitions, all are based on this thought - I am devoted to you because you are my god, you are my guru, you are my saviour, you are my blasted companion, whatever it is - thought. And this thought has been the current in every market of life - right?
- from the Egyptians, the Greeks and the Romans and the present culture - thought. Right? And my brain, the area of my brain is the content of that thought.
So I say to myself, all right, that is a fact - learning a language and all the rest of it. Now what is thought? What is thought, the direction of thought - you follow?
- what is thought moving to create, to destroy, what is this thing called thought? And can the mind be without thought, and what happens if it is without thought? We have seen examples, doctors and others, when there is no thought, the mind becomes a vegetable.
Right? Amnesia, doesn't know a thing. Now what am I to do?
You understand my question now? Thought prevents the understanding of the whole of fear, and therefore there must be an understanding of thought, its structure, its nature, its activities, its limitations, its binding quality and so on. So what is thought?
Why has man given such tremendous importance to thought? In India, for example, they have given importance to thought by saying, life can be divided into many temples - the devotional, the active mind, the devotional mind, the active mind, the silent mind, the mind that requires knowledge - which are called the four yogas, and all kinds of things, the four philosophies. So again the division.
You follow? The Greeks, not that I am a specialist in Greeks, I have observed. I don't read history and therefore I've just observed - Greeks, the ancient Greeks, said, 'Thought is necessary', because thought is measure, without measurement you can't do anything, you can't build a Parthenon, you can't create a face without measurement.
All their philosophy, their democracy and so on is based on measurement, to measure. And the Hindus said - on the other side - said, 'To measure is illusion'. They have a special word called 'ma' - 'ma' means to measure, maya means illusion.
So India said, where there is measurement - please listen to this, very interesting - where there is measurement mind must create illusion. And the west, from Greece, said, measurement is necessary - and on that all our western world is founded, technology, everything is the movement of measurement. Right?
Don't accept it, you can observe it as a fact. It is not my opinion. I have no opinions, thank god!
So there it is. So what is thought? Why are all our actions based on thought?
Love has become part of thought. You follow? I love you.
I am attached to you. I love you, I want to sleep with you - pleasure. And the measurement of pleasure is thought.
Right? Measurement of pleasure. So where there is measurement there is time.
Right? I will have that pleasure tomorrow, which is time. The tomorrow is the measure of thought.
Are you following all this? Does it interest you? For god's sake this is your life.
(In Italian) Need I translate that? Somebody do it, please. All right sir, I'll do it for you.
Don't make it difficult, be simple about it. The fear is the impermanency of ourselves, and the attachment - I'm translating generally - the attachment then becomes the cause of fear. Now just a minute, sir.
You see how my investigation is going on. I see around me, in India, in Europe, and in Asia, in America, the movement of thought, the movement of thought in relationship, the movement of thought in religion, all the inventions of their gods are the product of thought, and all the philosophies are based on thought - the philosophy of devotion, the philosophy of knowledge, the philosophy of action, everything around me is based on thought - thought being measure and therefore time. Right?
And we call progress the measurement of time. Right? The growth of national products - everything.
So, what is wrong with thought? You understand? The Asiatics, and especially India, India exploded over Asia, as Greece exploded over Europe, India exploded much more vastly over the whole of Asia.
There they said, 'Thought is measure, and to find the immeasurable, which is not measurable, thought must end'. Right? Because they said, 'To live in thought is to live in prison, and prison is a measurement'.
See the beauty of their... You follow? I am thinking it aloud for you, they don't say all this, I'm saying. To live in prison is measurement, and to be free of that measurement is to come upon that which is Brahman, which is immeasurable.
Right? Therefore they said, 'Control thought, suppress thought, thought is brought about through sensations, the senses, therefore don't look, don't go near a woman, don't touch, don't look, don't see anything, but close your eyes, suppress thought and work at it'. And the western world has said, 'Thought is absolutely necessary, there is no immeasurable'.
You can invent the immeasurable, all your gods are inventions - the serious investigators - they are all just your emotional reactions, the wish for your father, as the Christ and so on, they won't even accept all that. So thought has become the foundation. Right?
So what am I to do? I am investigating with you, I hope you are sharing and not just going off to sleep and polishing your nails. The moment I say, the mind says, 'Thought must end', who is it that says it?
You are following this? In observation thought is interfering therefore there is an assertive action taking place - which is, thought shall end. You follow this?
Why do you come to that conclusion? Because it interferes with your observation? Therefore there is a motive for your desire to observe, and that motive is measure.
I don't know if you follow this. Therefore that motive is time. I wonder if you see the subtleness of it.
So is your observation without a single motive? It is not, because thought says, I want to go beyond it. And thought has a cause, the cause being the desire to go beyond it, therefore it is measurable and therefore you are still caught in thought.
So what is the mind to do? It is not interested in observation at all - observation of fear. Now it has turned its attention to the enquiry into the whole movement, structure, nature, function of thought.
Not that it wants to stop it, not that it wants to control it, just to observe. Right? Why has man, right through the ages, given importance to thought?
(Inaudible) Go a little deeper than that, we'll answer, we will go into all that. All cultures, ancient, those cultures that have disappeared, all cultures have given importance to thought. Why?
Find the answer, sir, don't give it up. It is the only instrument we have to live. It is the only instrument that we have.
Is that so? Wait, wait. You people don't know how to investigate.
You all say, everyone says, including you, thought is the only instrument we have, and we abide by that. Right? Which is our tradition, of course.
So see what has happened. We say that is the only instrument, and this has been handed down to us, generation after generation. Right?
And I say, yes, that is the only instrument I have. Why do you limit the instrument that you have to only one thing? You understand my question?
Aren't there other instruments? So I am asking, is there an instrument other than thought? The answer is, we want to go for... We want to know the answer in short.
(Laughter) He wants to know the answer quickly. (Laughter) Sir, the answer quickly is to observe without the movement of thought. Observe yourself, your wife, the world, everything about you, nature, the clouds, the beauty of a hill, the flowing waters, and the bird on the wing, everything observe, including your own desires, without a single movement of thought.
That is the final answer. Can I explain how I feel? We feel that we are in prison with a locked door, and the key to open the door is the other instrument which is observation without the ways of thought.
But the key is attached to the door... the key is on the other side. I am locked inside a room and the key is on the other side of the door. And you are asking me to open the door, which is an impossibility.
That is a good simile but not real. By stating that the key is on the other side you have already blocked yourself. Ben'e?
I have no key, I have no door, I have only one problem. (Inaudible) Wait. The gentleman wants to know, I have talked for fifty years, is it merely an intellectual philosophy, or is it something that is real?
You know the meaning of the word 'philosophy' means, the love of truth - right, sir? - the love of life, not the inventions which the intellect creates, that has nothing to do with reality. So I am not giving you a philosophy.
Have we changed? We all want to change. They all want change.
You all want change. A moment, sir. Go patient.
You all want change. Change to what? To be a little freer.
To be a little freer. I am not interested in being a little freer. Sir, you don't understand.
Sorry. You haven't taken the time or the trouble to read or to find out what the speaker has to say. I have read all your books.
Then, sir, you know it by the mind, but we are talking of living, not speculating, not talking about it. We have come to the point when we say, that we have only one instrument, the intellect, which is thought. And I am why do we limit ourselves to one instrument?
Is it that we are caught in habit, in tradition, in accepting there is only one instrument? Of course. So please, all this involves change in life, in our action, in our daily life, not in your speculative philosophy, in your gods, that has nothing to do with it.
What we are talking about is your daily life. If your daily life is based on thought, then you are going to create such havoc in the world, which you have. And any change that thought brings about is still within the same area, whether communist, socialist, Catholic, or any other religion, it is still within the same area of confusion.
So you have got to find out if you want to radically change. And to go into that you have to say, why does thought in your life play such tremendous importance? There is a tremendous urge to find out about life.