jamesliu23/simpsons · Datasets at Hugging Face

text stringlengths 7 697
Homer...
Marge, Lisa loves me, the pony stays.
All right. You got us into this, you get us out.
Fine, I will. There's plenty of money out there for a guy who's willing to work for it.
Do you have any jewelry you don't need anymore?
You're so beautiful.
Oh look. You haven't touched your salt lick. Num num, good salt lick.
Need money. Need money.
One Scratch-for-Cash, please.
Here you go.
Liberty Bell... Two Liberty Bells... come on, come on, come on... Oh. Yes! Whoo-hoo! Three Liberty Bells! That'll be TEN thousand dollars, Apu.
Oh congratulations, Mr. Homer!
Thank you.
If I could just see the ticket...
There it is.
Please to be removing your thumb.
Yes. Please, I must insist...
No! No!
I've got to look at the ticket
No! You can't see... come on!
Yes, I must...
Let go. You're ripping it.
A cherry! Oh, Mr. Homer, what has reduced you to such cheap chicanery?
Ohh... I need money.
Well, if you need money you should have at least jammed a gun in my head or better yet you could inquire about my "Help Wanted" sign.
You're looking for help?
Yes. We need someone for the demanding, yet high-profile midnight to eight a.m. shift.
I'm your man!
You're hired.
Woo-hoo!
Always I dreamed the day would come when one of you would be working for me!
She certainly tamed that horse.
Yes, but what man can tame her?
I won't lie to you. On this job you will be shot at.
Each of these bullet wounds is a badge of honor.
...Badge of honor.
Here's a pointer: try to take it in the shoulder.
Now, these hot dogs have been here for three years. They are strictly ornamental. There's only one bozo who comes in and buys them.
But I eat... Oh.
Heh heh, the perfect crime.
Homer, where have you been? I was so worried.
Marge, could we go in the other room? I did something last night I'm not proud of and I don't want the kids to hear it.
Busted!
I'll work form midnight to eight, come home, sleep for five minutes, eat breakfast, sleep six more minutes, shower, then I have ten minutes to spend as I please. Then I'm off to the power plant, fresh as a daisy.
Oh my God, she killed him.
Mmm... salty.
Homer, are you stealing Squishees?
No sir.
This next song is also about a girl and her pony. It's called "Wildfire."
Come on, Apu honey, loosen up.
I'm sorry, baby. While I am here pleasuring you, my store is going down the tubes.
Three dollars and fifty-one... fifty-two... fifty-three cents.
Homer! You are asleep at your post! Now go change the expiration dates on the dairy products.
Yes sir.
Sorry baby, date's over.
Homie, how long do you plan to do this?
I don't know. How long do horses live?
Thirty years?
Mustn't sleep. Must monitor core.
Y'ello.
I just called to say I love you, Dad.
Thanks. When is she gonna stop loving me?
I just heard Millie Vanillie was just arrested for impersonating a McNugget.
Well, it's true.
Well, it's still fun to be up late.
Hey, Homer, where ya goin'?
Going for... eight hour walk.
Homer sleep now.
What's wrong with Dad?
He's just exhausted. Lisa, do you know how much it costs to keep a pony?
Well, it's a lot. In fact, your father had to take a second job.
The poor guy. Where's he working?
The Kwik-E-Mart.
Lisa, I hope you realize that your father can't keep this up.
You're gonna make me give up Princess?
Lisa, we can't make you give up that pony.
I can make her. Just give me five minutes alone with her.
No, Bart. No one's going to make her. This is something Lisa has to decide for herself.
All the years I've lobbied to be treated like an adult has blown up in my face.
Hey, pink hat, when I ordered that blueberry squishee, I meant today.
Coming right up, sir.
And fill it to the top this time.
Yes, sir.
She likes a little carrot after her oats. And she really likes it when you scratch her behind the ear. And if you're playing the radio, she likes contemporary adult in the morning and easy listening at night. Please take good care of my Princess.
Although there is no change in my patrician facade, I can assure you my heart is breaking.
I'll never forget you.
What--- wha, da, you call this melted cheese receptacle clean? Eh, the young man you replaced is rolling over in his grave.
Dad, you don't have to do this.
Yes I do. You see Lisa, grownups have a thing called money...
Dad, I understand the sacrifice you've made for me. That's why I gave up the pony.
You did?
Hmmm hmmm. There's a big dumb animal I love even more than that horse.
Oh no! What is it, a hippopotamus!
I mean you, you dummy.
Apu. You can take this job and re-staff it!
Giddyup, Dad.
He slept, he stole, he was rude to the customers... still, there goes the best damn employee a convenience store ever had.
Products you could only imagine before. The Foam Doam...the Jet Walker...Mr. Sugar Cube...
That baby changed our lives.
Thank you, Troy. Hi, everybody.

Homer...

Marge, Lisa loves me, the pony stays.

All right. You got us into this, you get us out.

Fine, I will. There's plenty of money out there for a guy who's willing to work for it.

Do you have any jewelry you don't need anymore?

You're so beautiful.

Oh look. You haven't touched your salt lick. Num num, good salt lick.

Need money. Need money.

One Scratch-for-Cash, please.

Here you go.

Liberty Bell... Two Liberty Bells... come on, come on, come on... Oh. Yes! Whoo-hoo! Three Liberty Bells! That'll be TEN thousand dollars, Apu.

Oh congratulations, Mr. Homer!

Thank you.

If I could just see the ticket...

There it is.

Please to be removing your thumb.

Yes. Please, I must insist...

No! No!

I've got to look at the ticket

No! You can't see... come on!

Yes, I must...

Let go. You're ripping it.

A cherry! Oh, Mr. Homer, what has reduced you to such cheap chicanery?

Ohh... I need money.

Well, if you need money you should have at least jammed a gun in my head or better yet you could inquire about my "Help Wanted" sign.

You're looking for help?

Yes. We need someone for the demanding, yet high-profile midnight to eight a.m. shift.

I'm your man!

You're hired.

Woo-hoo!

Always I dreamed the day would come when one of you would be working for me!

She certainly tamed that horse.

Yes, but what man can tame her?

I won't lie to you. On this job you will be shot at.

Each of these bullet wounds is a badge of honor.

...Badge of honor.

Here's a pointer: try to take it in the shoulder.

Now, these hot dogs have been here for three years. They are strictly ornamental. There's only one bozo who comes in and buys them.

But I eat... Oh.

Heh heh, the perfect crime.

Homer, where have you been? I was so worried.

Marge, could we go in the other room? I did something last night I'm not proud of and I don't want the kids to hear it.

Busted!

I'll work form midnight to eight, come home, sleep for five minutes, eat breakfast, sleep six more minutes, shower, then I have ten minutes to spend as I please. Then I'm off to the power plant, fresh as a daisy.

Oh my God, she killed him.

Mmm... salty.

Homer, are you stealing Squishees?

No sir.

This next song is also about a girl and her pony. It's called "Wildfire."

Come on, Apu honey, loosen up.

I'm sorry, baby. While I am here pleasuring you, my store is going down the tubes.

Three dollars and fifty-one... fifty-two... fifty-three cents.

Homer! You are asleep at your post! Now go change the expiration dates on the dairy products.

Yes sir.

Sorry baby, date's over.

Homie, how long do you plan to do this?

I don't know. How long do horses live?

Thirty years?

Mustn't sleep. Must monitor core.

Y'ello.

I just called to say I love you, Dad.

Thanks. When is she gonna stop loving me?

I just heard Millie Vanillie was just arrested for impersonating a McNugget.

Well, it's true.

Well, it's still fun to be up late.

Hey, Homer, where ya goin'?

Going for... eight hour walk.

Homer sleep now.

What's wrong with Dad?

He's just exhausted. Lisa, do you know how much it costs to keep a pony?

Well, it's a lot. In fact, your father had to take a second job.

The poor guy. Where's he working?

The Kwik-E-Mart.

Lisa, I hope you realize that your father can't keep this up.

You're gonna make me give up Princess?

Lisa, we can't make you give up that pony.

I can make her. Just give me five minutes alone with her.

No, Bart. No one's going to make her. This is something Lisa has to decide for herself.

All the years I've lobbied to be treated like an adult has blown up in my face.

Hey, pink hat, when I ordered that blueberry squishee, I meant today.

Coming right up, sir.

And fill it to the top this time.

Yes, sir.

She likes a little carrot after her oats. And she really likes it when you scratch her behind the ear. And if you're playing the radio, she likes contemporary adult in the morning and easy listening at night. Please take good care of my Princess.

Although there is no change in my patrician facade, I can assure you my heart is breaking.

I'll never forget you.

What--- wha, da, you call this melted cheese receptacle clean? Eh, the young man you replaced is rolling over in his grave.

Dad, you don't have to do this.

Yes I do. You see Lisa, grownups have a thing called money...

Dad, I understand the sacrifice you've made for me. That's why I gave up the pony.

You did?

Hmmm hmmm. There's a big dumb animal I love even more than that horse.

Oh no! What is it, a hippopotamus!

I mean you, you dummy.

Apu. You can take this job and re-staff it!

Giddyup, Dad.

He slept, he stole, he was rude to the customers... still, there goes the best damn employee a convenience store ever had.

Products you could only imagine before. The Foam Doam...the Jet Walker...Mr. Sugar Cube...

That baby changed our lives.

Thank you, Troy. Hi, everybody.