rqchao/spongebob · Datasets at Hugging Face

Non-SpongeBob Dialogue stringlengths 1 11.1k	SpongeBob Response stringlengths 1 2.74k
Patrick: And my pickles!	I can't believe you're leaving, Patrick. WITH ALL MY PICKLES!!!!
Patrick: It's the end of me being here.	Wait! Stop! What about all our plans? 8:00am - Wake up Patrick, 9:00am - Eat Kelpo with Patrick, 10:00am - Brush teeth with Patrick, 1:00pm - Stare at Patrick. Who's gonna do all that with me?
Patrick: I'm sorry, there's no stopping the unstoppable. Patrick Star will live no more, forever... in Bikini Bottom.	But... what if you weren't Patrick Star?
Patrick: Oh, no. I'm not Patrick Star?	You are Patrick Star, but you won't be for long.
Patrick: Huh?	There ya go, Patrick. No one will know it's you. Patrick, you okay?
Larry: Hey guys! Yo, Patrick, cool shades.	Well, Pat, that disguise didn't work. We're gonna have to try harder.
Patrick: Yeah, well, thanks ol' SpongeBob for your help. It was a noble effort but alas, all in vain, it's no use. I must leave. Goodbye rock. Goodbye coral. YOW! Goodbye seaweed.	Too bad we couldn't come up with a better costume. Hmmm...
Patrick: Goodbye sky.	That's it. With the seaweed on your head, you could be a...
Patrick: Oh, I know, I know! I could be Mr. Seaweed Monsterman. And live happily forever after in Bikini Bottom.	Patrick, there already is a Mr. Seaweed Monsterman.
Seaweed Monsterman: Hey! Patrick: Darn!	It's okay, Patrick. So you can't be a monster. But that vegetation on your head gives me an idea of what you can be. You're all set. Come on out, Patrick.
Fish #2: Hi, SpongeBob. And hello, lady.	The disguise is working, Patrick... I mean, Patricia.
Larry: SpongeBob, you never told me you had a girlfriend. Patrick: Oh, I'm not his girlfriend. I'm Pat...	...tricia. Pat-ricia. Patricia!
Larry: Bro, your girlfriend is not ugly.	Actually, Larry, she's not my girlfriend, she's just a...
Larry: It's cool, buddy. You don't have to explain your girlfriend to me.	But she's not my girlfriend.
Larry: I don't know why you're standing here talking to me when you could be talking to your girlfriend.	C'mon, Patricia.
Patricia: Bye. Larry: Congratulations on the new girlfriend, dude! Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob! This is not the time for Sunday Stroll. It's time for work.	But, Mr. Krabs, the Krusty Krab doesn't open for another two hours.
Mr. Krabs: There be no such thing as opening too early, me boy. Excuse us, miss. Huh? SpongeBob, who's your friend?	Mr. Krabs, this is Patricia.
Mr. Krabs: Patricia. The most beautiful sound I've ever seen. SpongeBob, do we need any more help down at the Krusty Krab?	No.
Mr. Krabs: We do? Great, she can start right away. Squidward: He- And who are you, my rubenesque beauty? Mr. Krabs: That's Patricia, our newest Krusty Krab employee. Squidward: Well, she sure is stunning. Mr. Krabs: Just keep your eyes on the customers, Mr. Squidward. Squidward: Hi, Patricia. I drew this for you. Likeness is uncanny, if I do say so myself. Patricia: Uhh, thank you, Squidward. Mr. Krabs: Order up, Miss Patricia. Patricia: Excuse me, Squidward. Mr. Krabs: This order goes to table 7 and remember your manners. Patricia: Forty... thirty... Mr. Krabs: That's a 7, Patricia. Patricia: Mr. Krabs, you ordered two Krusty meals? Mr. Krabs: Did I order two meals? Oh, silly me. I can't possibly eat two Krusty meals, myself. I guess you'll just have to help me finish all this food. Patricia: Okay. Mr. Krabs: Patricia, we may have only known each other for a short time, now, but I feel like a special connection has been made. Patricia:	Quite an appetite, but she's all woman.
Squidward: Eh? Ya know, Patricia, they don't call me the 'Sizzle Lips Squid' for nothing. So, are you free this Saturday night? Patricia: No, that's the night SpongeBob and I are having a staring contest. Squidward: SpongeBob?! Mr. Krabs: Get back to work, you gold-bricking freeloader. Hut two, hut two, yah, yah! And don't come back 'til all the patties are krabby. Well, now that we're alone, how would you like to be my date Friday night to a... Patricia: Well, I can't. SpongeBob and I will be flying submarines that night. I have to get back to Krusting the Krab. Man, why are those two so nice to me? They were never this nice to Patrick. It's weird. Squidward: Are you sure about Saturday night? Patricia: Persistent bunch. Mr. Krabs: How about Sunday brunch? Patricia: No thanks, again! Squidward: But I made reservations for two at... Patricia: I said no. No. No way. No. No. NO! What is it about me that makes those two so friendly? It must have something to do with this disguise. I can't wear this any longer.	But if you reveal your secret identity, you'll have to leave Bikini Bottom!
Patricia: Well, I'm sorry, SpongeBob. I just can't live like this anymore. I'm tired of pretending to be someone I'm not. Fancy Fish: The lovely Patricia has returned to us! Patricia: I have an announcement to make. The entire day that I've worked here I've wanted to say... Um-um-um-uh... I've wanted to say that, uhh, th-that... That I will eat any leftovers on your plate! Customers: Huh? Sunny Seashores Salesfish: Ahoy, waitress, aren't you gonna take my order? Patricia: I'll be right there, sir.	What's the matter, Patrick?
Patricia: That's the guy with the briefcase. The guy who's trying to run me out of town.	The assassin!
Patricia: What can I get you, sir? Sunny Seashores Salesfish: Say, don't I know you from somewhere? Patricia: No! Sunny Seashores Salesfish: Hmmm... that's it! Get outta town! Patricia: He's onto us.	I won't let you do it. You'll have to do something horrible to me before I let you throw Patrick out of town.
Squidward & Mr. Krabs: Patrick?! Sunny Seashores Salesfish: You forgot your flyer.	Get outta town! To beautiful Sunny Seashores Resort. Look, this guy wasn't trying to run you out of town, he just wanted to sell you a luxury vacation at a modest price.
Patrick: Well, I guess I don't need this disguise anymore. Squidward: Umm, I think I need to take a shower. Mr. Krabs: So, let me get this straight, uh, you're not a woman? Patrick: No. Mr. Krabs: Well then, you're fired. Uhh, if anybody needs me, I'll be in my office for, I dunno, the next 20 years or so.	Hey, buddy, what do you say we go home and get started on this list?
Patrick and SpongeBob: Yaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhoooooooo! Mr. Krabs: Ah-ah-achoo! 36 days without a customer. Dave: So... hungry...	Ah! Mr. Krabs, a customer!
Mr. Krabs: Ah! Dave: No food... 3 days... Mr. Krabs: Hold on, me bucko! Food's on the way! Uhh... You got money, right? Dave: Yeah... Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob! Bring this guy some grub before he keels over!	Here you go, sir.
Dave: Oh. Krabby Patties, huh? Mr. Krabs: Finest under the sea! Dave: Yeah, yeah, sure. But where's the pizzazz? Mr. Krabs: Huh? Dave: I mean look at this place. I mean... what is the theme here? Underwater? It's boring. Foooood... water... atmosphere... Mr. Krabs: Nobody goes to a restaurant for atmosphere. They go for food! Fred: Hey, Tom! Tom: Fred! Hey, you wanna eat at the Krusty Krab? Fred: Nah. Let's go to the Shell Shack. They've got a talking dog! Tom: Great! Say, what's a dog? Mr. Krabs: Money walking! I need to think up a gimmick like that to bring people back in here!	I have an idea!
Mr. Krabs: Wait! I've got an idea! ...And so ladies and gentlemen, be sure to buy plenty of Krabby Patties as I bury myself alive! No free refills. Fred: Hey, everyone, listen! The talking dog at the Shell Shack is SINGING!!! Come on!	Mr. Krabs, I have an idea!
Mr. Krabs: What am I going to do? If I don't find an idea, I'll go out of business!	Mr. Krabs, I have an idea!
Mr. Krabs: Why can't someone give me an idea?	Mr. Krabs, I have an idea!
Mr. Krabs: Great Neptune in Heaven, I need an idea!!! Angel SpongeBob: Mr. KraaAAaaaAAAbbs! I haAave an ideeeaaaaAAaa! Mr. Krabs: What in the name of money are you waiting for, boy? Tell me!	OK. Mr. Krabs, Prepare yourself. Don't bother sitting down, because you'll just stand up when you see this! Ta-da!
Mr. Krabs: Great Barrier Reef! That patty's spoiled!	Mr. Krabs, it's not tainted meat. It's painted meat Pretty Patties! Available in 6 designer colors.
Mr. Krabs: Mr. Squidward! Come look! Mr. Krabs: Don't that look appetizing? Squidward: Mmm, mmm!!! Good, sir! Mr. Krabs: Wait! Gimme an orange patty... with extra purple! Mr. Krabs: What's next? Sequin milkshakes? Squidward: Bow-tie French fries?	No. Stop it! I know this is a good idea. I'll show you! I'll... I'll... I'll open my own restaurant! You'll see! Hey, Patrick, are you angry, too!?
Patrick: Yeah!	What's the matter?
Patrick: I can't see my forehead. What's your problem?	I have a good idea, and no one else thinks so.
Patrick: Me too. Inflatable pants! What's your idea?	I'm gonna open up a restaurant and sell Pretty Patties!
Patrick: Forget my dumb idea, that's great!	Are you ready for the big rush, Patrick? Pretty soon those hungry customers will be lining up, because we are open. I'm ready! I'm ready. I'm ready... Patrick! How long have we been standing here?!?
Patrick: Uhh... I gotta draw a new battery for this!	What if Mr. Krabs was right? Maybe my idea is dumb.
Patrick: SpongeBob, sometimes, we have to go deep inside ourselves to solve our problems.	I'm scared.
Patrick: Then I'm going in for you! Patrick: Sorry. Stupid inflatable pants!	Did you find anything?
Patrick: Huh? Harold: Hey, do you sell food here?	Yes, sir! We sell Pretty Patties!
Harold: That thing's green! Green! Patrick: Green.	Mr. Krabs was right! What am I going to do with all these?
Harold: Hey, is that one purple? Purple is my favorite color! This isn't half bad! Hey, world! Pretty Patties is the best idea ever! Rick's Wife: Oh, Rick, how could you? Together we were one. Rick: That was before. But now, I'm splitting us up. Johnny: We interrupt this program to bring you a special news announcement! This wild crowd behind me is screaming for Bikini Bottom's latest culinary sensation. Let's take a listen. All: Pretty Patties! Pretty Patties! Mr. Krabs: Pretty Patties? Johnny: It's easy to see Pretty Patties are popular, but what is it about them that drives Bikini Bottom feeders wild? Millie, Sadie , and Evelyn: They match our purses! Scottish Man: They remind me of home. Larry: Pretty Patties rule! Johnny: Mr. SquarePants, how do you explain all this success?	Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... I don't know.
Mr. Krabs: How can you make money with such a stupid idea? Johnny: And how can you not make money with such a brilliant idea?	At first we didn't know what to do with all the money. We tried burying it... ...shredding it... ...and burning it! But in the end, we decided just to give it all away.
Patrick: Come again, sir! Nathiel: I'm getting back in line! Mr. Krabs: I don't believe it! I've got to see this for me self! Sandals: Hey Watch it, buddy. I don't care how much you want your Pretty Patty. You're gonna have to wait in line like the rest of us. Mr. Krabs: I've never had a line.	Who's #46,853?
Mr. Krabs: I never had 46,853 customers.	Here you are, sir. Stay pretty. All right. Mr. Krabs is that you? Isn't this great, Mr. Krabs? The Pretty Patties are a big hit.
Mr. Krabs: They sure are, boy. You're doing pretty well for yourself. I guess you've completely forgotten the Krusty Krab.	No, sir, I haven't. Sometimes I really miss the old days back at the Krusty Krab.
Mr. Krabs: I bet you miss Squidward... and the grill. And the crow's nest.	Yeah. Yeah! But do you know what I miss the most, Mr. Krabs? That tiny squeaking sound you get when you rub two pickles together. You know what I mean, Mr. Krabs?
Mr. Krabs: Uhh... Yes. Yes, I do, lad. Well, the Krusty Krab's only a short walk away. Why don't you head on down. For old time's sake.	Oh, I can't leave, Mr. Krabs. What about the stand?
Mr. Krabs: Don't worry, lad. I'll watch the stand for ye.	You will?
Mr. Krabs: No, I've got a better idea! I'll take this old roadside stand off your hands- for keeps! An in exchange, I'll give ya the Krusty Krab! With Squidward, the grill, and all those squeaky pickles!	What did you say, Mr. Krabs?
Mr. Krabs: Here's the key to the Krusty Krab. She's yours now.	Thank... you... what should I do now, Mr. Krabs?
Mr. Krabs: Run to her, boy. She's waiting for ya.	I can't feel my legs, Mr. Krabs.
Mr. Krabs: Don't worry, boy! I'll fix it! Get this to the Krusty Krab on the double! Good luck, lad!	Dreams do come true!
Mr. Krabs: Ladies and gentlemen! Pretty Patties is now under new management! Who's next? Mr. Krabs: I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready...For me money. Welcome to Pretty Patties. May I take your money? Franco: We want a refund, Krabs. Mr. Krabs: Who, huh, What? Gus: Your dumb Pretty Patties turned my face purple! Scottish Man: Look what I got under my kilt! Clay, John, and Frank: And look at our tongues! Mr. Krabs: What's wrong with you? Frank: We want our money back. All 46,853 of us. Harold: Hey, where'd he go? Crowd: Get him! Mr. Krabs: Oof! My key! Where's my key?! SpongeBob! SpongeBob, let me in! SpongeBob! SpongeBob! SpongeBob! Let me in! SpongeBob! French Narrator: Ah, the sea... so fascinating. So wonderful. Here, we see Bikini Bottom, teeming with life. Home to one of my favorite creatures, SpongeBob SquarePants. Yes, of course he lives in a pineapple, you silly. SpongeBob SquarePants: Today's the big day, Gary! Gary the Snail: Meow.	Look at me, I'm... ...naked! Gotta be in top physical condition for today, Gary.
Gary: Meow.	I'm ready!!! I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready!
Patrick Star: Go, SpongeBob! Whoa! SpongeBob (1997 Version): I'm ready! I'm ready! Narrator (1997 Version) : SpongeBob SquarePants!	There it is. The finest eating establishment ever established for eating: The Krusty Krab, home of the Krabby Patty... with a Help Wanted sign in the window. For years I've been dreaming of this moment. I'm gonna go in there, march straight to the manager, look 'im straight in the eye , lay it on the line and... I can't do this! Hey, Patrick-
Patrick: Where do you think you're going?	I was just...
Patrick: No, you're not. You're going to the Krusty Krab and get! That! Job!	I can't, don't you see? I'm not good enough.
Patrick: Whose first words were May I take your order??	Mine were.
Patrick: Who made a spatula out of toothpicks in wood shop?	I did.
Patrick: Who's a, uh, who's uhh, oh! And who's the big yellow cube with holes?	I am!
Patrick: Who's ready?	I'm ready!
Patrick: Who's ready?	I'm ready!
Patrick: Who's ready?!	I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready!
Squidward Tentacles: Oh no, SpongeBob. What could he possibly want?	I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! Go, SpongeBob! Go, SpongeBob! Go, SpongeBob! Go, self!
Squidward: Mr. Krabs! Hurry, Mr. Krabs, before it's too late, I gotta tell you-	Permission to come aboard, captain. I've been training my whole life for the day I could join the Krusty Krew and now I'm ready. So, uh, when do I start?
Eugene H. Krabs: Well, lad, it looks like you don't even have your sea legs.	Mr. Krabs, please. I'll prove I'm fry cook material. Ask Squidward, he'll vouch for me.
Squidward: No. Mr. Krabs: Well, lad, we'll give you a test, and if you pass, you'll be on the Krusty Krew. Go out and fetch me... a, uh, hydrodynamic spatula... with, um, port-and-starboard-attachments, and, uh... turbo drive. And don't come back ‘til you get one.	Aye aye, captain! One hydrodynamic spatula, with port-and-starboard attachments, turbo drive, coming right up, Sir!
Mr. Krabs: Carry on! We'll never see that lubber again. Squidward: You're terrible. A hydro-what? Bus driver: Hey! Hey! Please! Passengers are to stay seated and not put their fins out the window! Mr. Krabs: That sounded like hatch doors! Do you smell it? That smell... A kind of smelly smell... A smelly smell that smells... smelly... Anchovies. Squidward: What? Mr. Krabs: Anchovies!! Squidward: Please, please, quiet! Is this any way to behave, hmmm? Anchovy: Meep. Squidward: Could we show a little decency and form a neat, single file line in front of the register?	♪ Barg'N-Mart, meeting all of your spatula needs. ♪
Mr. Krabs: All hands on deck! Get your anchors out of your pants! Squidward: One single file line was all I asked! Mr. Krabs: Whoa! Batten down the hatches, Mr. Squidward! We're taking on water, Mr. Squidward! I want my mommy, Mr. Squidward!	♪ Do do do do do do, spatula, spatula, port-and-starboard attachments. ♪
Squidward: Help! Mr. Krabs: Man overboard! Climb, Mr. Squidward! Climb! Anchovies: Meep! Meep! Mr. Krabs: This is the end! Goodbye, Mr. Squidward! Squidward: Oh, Mr. Krabs!	Permission to come aboard captain! Da da da da da da da! Da da da da da da da da da da! Did someone order a spatula?
Squidward and Mr. Krabs:	That's right! One hydrodynamic spatula with port-and-starboard attachments! And let's not forget the turbo drive! Would you believe they only had one in stock? To the kitchen! Who's hungry?!
Mr. Krabs: That was the finest fast-foodsmanship I've ever seen, Mr. SquarePants. Welcome aboard. Squidward: B-but, but, Mr. Krabs... Mr. Krabs: Three cheers for SpongeBob! Hip-hip! Squidward: Hooray, Mr.- Mr. Krabs: Hip-hip! Squidward: Hooray. Mr. Krabs: Hip-hip! Squidward: Hooray. Mr. Krabs- Mr. Krabs: I'll be in my quarters, counting up the booty. Patrick: Good morning, Krusty Krew! Squidward: What would you like to order, Patrick? Patrick: One Krabby Patty, please. Patrick: Squidward: Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs, come see your new employee...!	Hi, Squidward! What'cha watchin'?
News Reporter: We'll be right back. SpongeBob': Oh, it's a commercial. Commercial: They're new! They're...Snail Bites!	Ooh.
Squidward: Here, I'll change the channel.	Don't change the channel!
Commercial: Snail Bites. Snail Bites! Male fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Female fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Snail Bites. Male fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Commercial: Snail Bites. Female fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Male fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Commercial: They're new. Snail Bites! Female fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Commercial: Snail Bites! Female and male fish in commercial: Your snail will go nuts for Snail Bites... and so will you. Commercial: Snail Bites.	Did you see that, Squidward? Snail Bites. Gary, I'm home! Oh, Gary! You've got a big surprise coming to you.
Gary: Meow.	Snail Bites.
Gary: Meow.	It smells good?
Gary: Meow!	Does somebody want another Snail Bite? Can somebody roll over? Roll over. We'll have some more of these a little later.
Gary: Meow.	More treats?
Gary: Meow, meow, meow!	Well, I can't say no to my wittle Garebear.
Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow!	Gary, that's an awful lot of Snail Bites for one evening. Are you sure you want more? Well, I suppose one more couldn't hurt. Whoops, looks like that was the last of them Gary. We're all out. It's probably for the best. I'm getting pretty tired anyway. I think I'll skip my nightly motivational exercise and go to straight to bed.
Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow! Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow!	Gary, please!
Gary: Meow, meow, meow!	Gary Wilson, Jr., I promise you we will get more treats tomorrow! Now, please, let me sleep.
Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!	Gary! It is 4:00 in the morning! What exactly do you want from me?!
Gary: Meow.	Gary, this is ridiculous! See? The pet store won't be open for hours. Not to mention it's freezing out here! Can't we just go home and come back in the morning?
Gary: Meow.	I just can't say no to my little Garebear. Good night, Gary. See ya in the morning! Excuse me!
Harold: Please! I'm just the floor manager! The cashier won't be here for another hour!	Do you have any Snail Bites? We need some Snail Bites.
Gary: Meow! Harold: Oh, You mean, the box of Snail Bites?	Yes, sir!
Harold: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! Those sold out almost immediately! Gary: Meow!	Ok, Gary, I'm off to the Krusty Krab! Hope your day is as fun-filled as mine! Whoa! Gary?! Yes, so, I will see you tonight, Gary. Gary, is that a box of Snail Bites in your teeth? He, he. That's funny, because I think I just saw a half-full box in the kitchen.
Gary: Meow! Abigail-Marge: Normally, I'm so shy, but... Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow!	Gary, what are you doing here? You're causing a scene!
Gary: Meow!	I know, you want more Snail Bites. But the pet store was completely sold out of them!
Gary: Meow!	I know, Gary...
Gary: Meow!	Gary, I just said the pet store was completely sold out of Snail Bites! What am I supposed to do?
Nat Peterson: Well, you can try going to the factory where they make them.	Thanks a lot. You're what?!
Factory Worker: We're closed! Do I have to spell it out for you? C-S-L-O-S-Z-E-D. Cuh-losed! Not only that, but the very last box of Snail Bites shipped out days ago! They were such a hit they flew out of the stores and now, we've run out of ingredients! From what I hear, the owner even dropped out of the pet food business entirely! Yeah, I mean, why wouldn't he, huh? He's made his money!	You see, Gary? There are no more--
Factory Worker: I mean, it's not like I wouldn't do the same thing if I were in his shoes!	So, you see, Gary, there...
Factory Worker: Why would anybody go around punishing themselves, just for the sake of the happiness of a few pets or...	Would you mind being quiet for one second, please!

Patrick: And my pickles!

I can't believe you're leaving, Patrick. WITH ALL MY PICKLES!!!!

Patrick: It's the end of me being here.

Wait! Stop! What about all our plans? 8:00am - Wake up Patrick, 9:00am - Eat Kelpo with Patrick, 10:00am - Brush teeth with Patrick, 1:00pm - Stare at Patrick. Who's gonna do all that with me?

Patrick: I'm sorry, there's no stopping the unstoppable. Patrick Star will live no more, forever... in Bikini Bottom.

But... what if you weren't Patrick Star?

Patrick: Oh, no. I'm not Patrick Star?

You are Patrick Star, but you won't be for long.

Patrick: Huh?

There ya go, Patrick. No one will know it's you. Patrick, you okay?

Larry: Hey guys! Yo, Patrick, cool shades.

Well, Pat, that disguise didn't work. We're gonna have to try harder.

Patrick: Yeah, well, thanks ol' SpongeBob for your help. It was a noble effort but alas, all in vain, it's no use. I must leave. Goodbye rock. Goodbye coral. YOW! Goodbye seaweed.

Too bad we couldn't come up with a better costume. Hmmm...

Patrick: Goodbye sky.

That's it. With the seaweed on your head, you could be a...

Patrick: Oh, I know, I know! I could be Mr. Seaweed Monsterman. And live happily forever after in Bikini Bottom.

Patrick, there already is a Mr. Seaweed Monsterman.

Seaweed Monsterman: Hey! Patrick: Darn!

It's okay, Patrick. So you can't be a monster. But that vegetation on your head gives me an idea of what you can be. You're all set. Come on out, Patrick.

Fish #2: Hi, SpongeBob. And hello, lady.

The disguise is working, Patrick... I mean, Patricia.

Larry: SpongeBob, you never told me you had a girlfriend. Patrick: Oh, I'm not his girlfriend. I'm Pat...

...tricia. Pat-ricia. Patricia!

Larry: Bro, your girlfriend is not ugly.

Actually, Larry, she's not my girlfriend, she's just a...

Larry: It's cool, buddy. You don't have to explain your girlfriend to me.

But she's not my girlfriend.

Larry: I don't know why you're standing here talking to me when you could be talking to your girlfriend.

C'mon, Patricia.

Patricia: Bye. Larry: Congratulations on the new girlfriend, dude! Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob! This is not the time for Sunday Stroll. It's time for work.

But, Mr. Krabs, the Krusty Krab doesn't open for another two hours.

Mr. Krabs: There be no such thing as opening too early, me boy. Excuse us, miss. Huh? SpongeBob, who's your friend?

Mr. Krabs, this is Patricia.

Mr. Krabs: Patricia. The most beautiful sound I've ever seen. SpongeBob, do we need any more help down at the Krusty Krab?

No.

Mr. Krabs: We do? Great, she can start right away. Squidward: He- And who are you, my rubenesque beauty? Mr. Krabs: That's Patricia, our newest Krusty Krab employee. Squidward: Well, she sure is stunning. Mr. Krabs: Just keep your eyes on the customers, Mr. Squidward. Squidward: Hi, Patricia. I drew this for you. Likeness is uncanny, if I do say so myself. Patricia: Uhh, thank you, Squidward. Mr. Krabs: Order up, Miss Patricia. Patricia: Excuse me, Squidward. Mr. Krabs: This order goes to table 7 and remember your manners. Patricia: Forty... thirty... Mr. Krabs: That's a 7, Patricia. Patricia: Mr. Krabs, you ordered two Krusty meals? Mr. Krabs: Did I order two meals? Oh, silly me. I can't possibly eat two Krusty meals, myself. I guess you'll just have to help me finish all this food. Patricia: Okay. Mr. Krabs: Patricia, we may have only known each other for a short time, now, but I feel like a special connection has been made. Patricia:

Quite an appetite, but she's all woman.

Squidward: Eh? Ya know, Patricia, they don't call me the 'Sizzle Lips Squid' for nothing. So, are you free this Saturday night? Patricia: No, that's the night SpongeBob and I are having a staring contest. Squidward: SpongeBob?! Mr. Krabs: Get back to work, you gold-bricking freeloader. Hut two, hut two, yah, yah! And don't come back 'til all the patties are krabby. Well, now that we're alone, how would you like to be my date Friday night to a... Patricia: Well, I can't. SpongeBob and I will be flying submarines that night. I have to get back to Krusting the Krab. Man, why are those two so nice to me? They were never this nice to Patrick. It's weird. Squidward: Are you sure about Saturday night? Patricia: Persistent bunch. Mr. Krabs: How about Sunday brunch? Patricia: No thanks, again! Squidward: But I made reservations for two at... Patricia: I said no. No. No way. No. No. NO! What is it about me that makes those two so friendly? It must have something to do with this disguise. I can't wear this any longer.

But if you reveal your secret identity, you'll have to leave Bikini Bottom!

Patricia: Well, I'm sorry, SpongeBob. I just can't live like this anymore. I'm tired of pretending to be someone I'm not. Fancy Fish: The lovely Patricia has returned to us! Patricia: I have an announcement to make. The entire day that I've worked here I've wanted to say... Um-um-um-uh... I've wanted to say that, uhh, th-that... That I will eat any leftovers on your plate! Customers: Huh? Sunny Seashores Salesfish: Ahoy, waitress, aren't you gonna take my order? Patricia: I'll be right there, sir.

What's the matter, Patrick?

Patricia: That's the guy with the briefcase. The guy who's trying to run me out of town.

The assassin!

Patricia: What can I get you, sir? Sunny Seashores Salesfish: Say, don't I know you from somewhere? Patricia: No! Sunny Seashores Salesfish: Hmmm... that's it! Get outta town! Patricia: He's onto us.

I won't let you do it. You'll have to do something horrible to me before I let you throw Patrick out of town.

Squidward & Mr. Krabs: Patrick?! Sunny Seashores Salesfish: You forgot your flyer.

Get outta town! To beautiful Sunny Seashores Resort. Look, this guy wasn't trying to run you out of town, he just wanted to sell you a luxury vacation at a modest price.

Patrick: Well, I guess I don't need this disguise anymore. Squidward: Umm, I think I need to take a shower. Mr. Krabs: So, let me get this straight, uh, you're not a woman? Patrick: No. Mr. Krabs: Well then, you're fired. Uhh, if anybody needs me, I'll be in my office for, I dunno, the next 20 years or so.

Hey, buddy, what do you say we go home and get started on this list?

Patrick and SpongeBob: Yaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhoooooooo! Mr. Krabs: Ah-ah-achoo! 36 days without a customer. Dave: So... hungry...

Ah! Mr. Krabs, a customer!

Mr. Krabs: Ah! Dave: No food... 3 days... Mr. Krabs: Hold on, me bucko! Food's on the way! Uhh... You got money, right? Dave: Yeah... Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob! Bring this guy some grub before he keels over!

Here you go, sir.

Dave: Oh. Krabby Patties, huh? Mr. Krabs: Finest under the sea! Dave: Yeah, yeah, sure. But where's the pizzazz? Mr. Krabs: Huh? Dave: I mean look at this place. I mean... what is the theme here? Underwater? It's boring. Foooood... water... atmosphere... Mr. Krabs: Nobody goes to a restaurant for atmosphere. They go for food! Fred: Hey, Tom! Tom: Fred! Hey, you wanna eat at the Krusty Krab? Fred: Nah. Let's go to the Shell Shack. They've got a talking dog! Tom: Great! Say, what's a dog? Mr. Krabs: Money walking! I need to think up a gimmick like that to bring people back in here!

I have an idea!

Mr. Krabs: Wait! I've got an idea! ...And so ladies and gentlemen, be sure to buy plenty of Krabby Patties as I bury myself alive! No free refills. Fred: Hey, everyone, listen! The talking dog at the Shell Shack is SINGING!!! Come on!

Mr. Krabs, I have an idea!

Mr. Krabs: What am I going to do? If I don't find an idea, I'll go out of business!

Mr. Krabs, I have an idea!

Mr. Krabs: Why can't someone give me an idea?

Mr. Krabs, I have an idea!

Mr. Krabs: Great Neptune in Heaven, I need an idea!!! Angel SpongeBob: Mr. KraaAAaaaAAAbbs! I haAave an ideeeaaaaAAaa! Mr. Krabs: What in the name of money are you waiting for, boy? Tell me!

OK. Mr. Krabs, Prepare yourself. Don't bother sitting down, because you'll just stand up when you see this! Ta-da!

Mr. Krabs: Great Barrier Reef! That patty's spoiled!

Mr. Krabs, it's not tainted meat. It's painted meat Pretty Patties! Available in 6 designer colors.

Mr. Krabs: Mr. Squidward! Come look! Mr. Krabs: Don't that look appetizing? Squidward: Mmm, mmm!!! Good, sir! Mr. Krabs: Wait! Gimme an orange patty... with extra purple! Mr. Krabs: What's next? Sequin milkshakes? Squidward: Bow-tie French fries?

No. Stop it! I know this is a good idea. I'll show you! I'll... I'll... I'll open my own restaurant! You'll see! Hey, Patrick, are you angry, too!?

Patrick: Yeah!

What's the matter?

Patrick: I can't see my forehead. What's your problem?

I have a good idea, and no one else thinks so.

Patrick: Me too. Inflatable pants! What's your idea?

I'm gonna open up a restaurant and sell Pretty Patties!

Patrick: Forget my dumb idea, that's great!

Are you ready for the big rush, Patrick? Pretty soon those hungry customers will be lining up, because we are open. I'm ready! I'm ready. I'm ready... Patrick! How long have we been standing here?!?

Patrick: Uhh... I gotta draw a new battery for this!

What if Mr. Krabs was right? Maybe my idea is dumb.

Patrick: SpongeBob, sometimes, we have to go deep inside ourselves to solve our problems.

I'm scared.

Patrick: Then I'm going in for you! Patrick: Sorry. Stupid inflatable pants!

Did you find anything?

Patrick: Huh? Harold: Hey, do you sell food here?

Yes, sir! We sell Pretty Patties!

Harold: That thing's green! Green! Patrick: Green.

Mr. Krabs was right! What am I going to do with all these?

Harold: Hey, is that one purple? Purple is my favorite color! This isn't half bad! Hey, world! Pretty Patties is the best idea ever! Rick's Wife: Oh, Rick, how could you? Together we were one. Rick: That was before. But now, I'm splitting us up. Johnny: We interrupt this program to bring you a special news announcement! This wild crowd behind me is screaming for Bikini Bottom's latest culinary sensation. Let's take a listen. All: Pretty Patties! Pretty Patties! Mr. Krabs: Pretty Patties? Johnny: It's easy to see Pretty Patties are popular, but what is it about them that drives Bikini Bottom feeders wild? Millie, Sadie , and Evelyn: They match our purses! Scottish Man: They remind me of home. Larry: Pretty Patties rule! Johnny: Mr. SquarePants, how do you explain all this success?

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... I don't know.

Mr. Krabs: How can you make money with such a stupid idea? Johnny: And how can you not make money with such a brilliant idea?

At first we didn't know what to do with all the money. We tried burying it... ...shredding it... ...and burning it! But in the end, we decided just to give it all away.

Patrick: Come again, sir! Nathiel: I'm getting back in line! Mr. Krabs: I don't believe it! I've got to see this for me self! Sandals: Hey Watch it, buddy. I don't care how much you want your Pretty Patty. You're gonna have to wait in line like the rest of us. Mr. Krabs: I've never had a line.

Who's #46,853?

Mr. Krabs: I never had 46,853 customers.

Here you are, sir. Stay pretty. All right. Mr. Krabs is that you? Isn't this great, Mr. Krabs? The Pretty Patties are a big hit.

Mr. Krabs: They sure are, boy. You're doing pretty well for yourself. I guess you've completely forgotten the Krusty Krab.

No, sir, I haven't. Sometimes I really miss the old days back at the Krusty Krab.

Mr. Krabs: I bet you miss Squidward... and the grill. And the crow's nest.

Yeah. Yeah! But do you know what I miss the most, Mr. Krabs? That tiny squeaking sound you get when you rub two pickles together. You know what I mean, Mr. Krabs?

Mr. Krabs: Uhh... Yes. Yes, I do, lad. Well, the Krusty Krab's only a short walk away. Why don't you head on down. For old time's sake.

Oh, I can't leave, Mr. Krabs. What about the stand?

Mr. Krabs: Don't worry, lad. I'll watch the stand for ye.

You will?

Mr. Krabs: No, I've got a better idea! I'll take this old roadside stand off your hands- for keeps! An in exchange, I'll give ya the Krusty Krab! With Squidward, the grill, and all those squeaky pickles!

What did you say, Mr. Krabs?

Mr. Krabs: Here's the key to the Krusty Krab. She's yours now.

Thank... you... what should I do now, Mr. Krabs?

Mr. Krabs: Run to her, boy. She's waiting for ya.

I can't feel my legs, Mr. Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: Don't worry, boy! I'll fix it! Get this to the Krusty Krab on the double! Good luck, lad!

Dreams do come true!

Mr. Krabs: Ladies and gentlemen! Pretty Patties is now under new management! Who's next? Mr. Krabs: I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready...For me money. Welcome to Pretty Patties. May I take your money? Franco: We want a refund, Krabs. Mr. Krabs: Who, huh, What? Gus: Your dumb Pretty Patties turned my face purple! Scottish Man: Look what I got under my kilt! Clay, John, and Frank: And look at our tongues! Mr. Krabs: What's wrong with you? Frank: We want our money back. All 46,853 of us. Harold: Hey, where'd he go? Crowd: Get him! Mr. Krabs: Oof! My key! Where's my key?! SpongeBob! SpongeBob, let me in! SpongeBob! SpongeBob! SpongeBob! Let me in! SpongeBob! French Narrator: Ah, the sea... so fascinating. So wonderful. Here, we see Bikini Bottom, teeming with life. Home to one of my favorite creatures, SpongeBob SquarePants. Yes, of course he lives in a pineapple, you silly. SpongeBob SquarePants: Today's the big day, Gary! Gary the Snail: Meow.

Look at me, I'm... ...naked! Gotta be in top physical condition for today, Gary.

Gary: Meow.

I'm ready!!! I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready!

Patrick Star: Go, SpongeBob! Whoa! SpongeBob (1997 Version): I'm ready! I'm ready! Narrator (1997 Version) : SpongeBob SquarePants!

There it is. The finest eating establishment ever established for eating: The Krusty Krab, home of the Krabby Patty... with a Help Wanted sign in the window. For years I've been dreaming of this moment. I'm gonna go in there, march straight to the manager, look 'im straight in the eye , lay it on the line and... I can't do this! Hey, Patrick-

Patrick: Where do you think you're going?

I was just...

Patrick: No, you're not. You're going to the Krusty Krab and get! That! Job!

I can't, don't you see? I'm not good enough.

Patrick: Whose first words were May I take your order??

Mine were.

Patrick: Who made a spatula out of toothpicks in wood shop?

I did.

Patrick: Who's a, uh, who's uhh, oh! And who's the big yellow cube with holes?

I am!

Patrick: Who's ready?

I'm ready!

Patrick: Who's ready?

I'm ready!

Patrick: Who's ready?!

I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready!

Squidward Tentacles: Oh no, SpongeBob. What could he possibly want?

I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! I'm ready! Go, SpongeBob! Go, SpongeBob! Go, SpongeBob! Go, self!

Squidward: Mr. Krabs! Hurry, Mr. Krabs, before it's too late, I gotta tell you-

Permission to come aboard, captain. I've been training my whole life for the day I could join the Krusty Krew and now I'm ready. So, uh, when do I start?

Eugene H. Krabs: Well, lad, it looks like you don't even have your sea legs.

Mr. Krabs, please. I'll prove I'm fry cook material. Ask Squidward, he'll vouch for me.

Squidward: No. Mr. Krabs: Well, lad, we'll give you a test, and if you pass, you'll be on the Krusty Krew. Go out and fetch me... a, uh, hydrodynamic spatula... with, um, port-and-starboard-attachments, and, uh... turbo drive. And don't come back ‘til you get one.

Aye aye, captain! One hydrodynamic spatula, with port-and-starboard attachments, turbo drive, coming right up, Sir!

Mr. Krabs: Carry on! We'll never see that lubber again. Squidward: You're terrible. A hydro-what? Bus driver: Hey! Hey! Please! Passengers are to stay seated and not put their fins out the window! Mr. Krabs: That sounded like hatch doors! Do you smell it? That smell... A kind of smelly smell... A smelly smell that smells... smelly... Anchovies. Squidward: What? Mr. Krabs: Anchovies!! Squidward: Please, please, quiet! Is this any way to behave, hmmm? Anchovy: Meep. Squidward: Could we show a little decency and form a neat, single file line in front of the register?

♪ Barg'N-Mart, meeting all of your spatula needs. ♪

Mr. Krabs: All hands on deck! Get your anchors out of your pants! Squidward: One single file line was all I asked! Mr. Krabs: Whoa! Batten down the hatches, Mr. Squidward! We're taking on water, Mr. Squidward! I want my mommy, Mr. Squidward!

♪ Do do do do do do, spatula, spatula, port-and-starboard attachments. ♪

Squidward: Help! Mr. Krabs: Man overboard! Climb, Mr. Squidward! Climb! Anchovies: Meep! Meep! Mr. Krabs: This is the end! Goodbye, Mr. Squidward! Squidward: Oh, Mr. Krabs!

Permission to come aboard captain! Da da da da da da da! Da da da da da da da da da da! Did someone order a spatula?

Squidward and Mr. Krabs:

That's right! One hydrodynamic spatula with port-and-starboard attachments! And let's not forget the turbo drive! Would you believe they only had one in stock? To the kitchen! Who's hungry?!

Mr. Krabs: That was the finest fast-foodsmanship I've ever seen, Mr. SquarePants. Welcome aboard. Squidward: B-but, but, Mr. Krabs... Mr. Krabs: Three cheers for SpongeBob! Hip-hip! Squidward: Hooray, Mr.- Mr. Krabs: Hip-hip! Squidward: Hooray. Mr. Krabs: Hip-hip! Squidward: Hooray. Mr. Krabs- Mr. Krabs: I'll be in my quarters, counting up the booty. Patrick: Good morning, Krusty Krew! Squidward: What would you like to order, Patrick? Patrick: One Krabby Patty, please. Patrick: Squidward: Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs! Mr. Krabs, come see your new employee...!

Hi, Squidward! What'cha watchin'?

News Reporter: We'll be right back. SpongeBob': Oh, it's a commercial. Commercial: They're new! They're...Snail Bites!

Ooh.

Squidward: Here, I'll change the channel.

Don't change the channel!

Commercial: Snail Bites. Snail Bites! Male fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Female fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Snail Bites. Male fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Commercial: Snail Bites. Female fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Male fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Commercial: They're new. Snail Bites! Female fish in commercial: Snail Bites. Commercial: Snail Bites! Female and male fish in commercial: Your snail will go nuts for Snail Bites... and so will you. Commercial: Snail Bites.

Did you see that, Squidward? Snail Bites. Gary, I'm home! Oh, Gary! You've got a big surprise coming to you.

Gary: Meow.

Snail Bites.

Gary: Meow.

It smells good?

Gary: Meow!

Does somebody want another Snail Bite? Can somebody roll over? Roll over. We'll have some more of these a little later.

Gary: Meow.

More treats?

Gary: Meow, meow, meow!

Well, I can't say no to my wittle Garebear.

Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow!

Gary, that's an awful lot of Snail Bites for one evening. Are you sure you want more? Well, I suppose one more couldn't hurt. Whoops, looks like that was the last of them Gary. We're all out. It's probably for the best. I'm getting pretty tired anyway. I think I'll skip my nightly motivational exercise and go to straight to bed.

Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow! Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow!

Gary, please!

Gary: Meow, meow, meow!

Gary Wilson, Jr., I promise you we will get more treats tomorrow! Now, please, let me sleep.

Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow! Meow!

Gary! It is 4:00 in the morning! What exactly do you want from me?!

Gary: Meow.

Gary, this is ridiculous! See? The pet store won't be open for hours. Not to mention it's freezing out here! Can't we just go home and come back in the morning?

Gary: Meow.

I just can't say no to my little Garebear. Good night, Gary. See ya in the morning! Excuse me!

Harold: Please! I'm just the floor manager! The cashier won't be here for another hour!

Do you have any Snail Bites? We need some Snail Bites.

Gary: Meow! Harold: Oh, You mean, the box of Snail Bites?

Yes, sir!

Harold: Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no! Those sold out almost immediately! Gary: Meow!

Ok, Gary, I'm off to the Krusty Krab! Hope your day is as fun-filled as mine! Whoa! Gary?! Yes, so, I will see you tonight, Gary. Gary, is that a box of Snail Bites in your teeth? He, he. That's funny, because I think I just saw a half-full box in the kitchen.

Gary: Meow! Abigail-Marge: Normally, I'm so shy, but... Gary: Meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow, meow!

Gary, what are you doing here? You're causing a scene!

Gary: Meow!

I know, you want more Snail Bites. But the pet store was completely sold out of them!

Gary: Meow!

I know, Gary...

Gary: Meow!

Gary, I just said the pet store was completely sold out of Snail Bites! What am I supposed to do?

Nat Peterson: Well, you can try going to the factory where they make them.

Thanks a lot. You're what?!

Factory Worker: We're closed! Do I have to spell it out for you? C-S-L-O-S-Z-E-D. Cuh-losed! Not only that, but the very last box of Snail Bites shipped out days ago! They were such a hit they flew out of the stores and now, we've run out of ingredients! From what I hear, the owner even dropped out of the pet food business entirely! Yeah, I mean, why wouldn't he, huh? He's made his money!

You see, Gary? There are no more--

Factory Worker: I mean, it's not like I wouldn't do the same thing if I were in his shoes!

So, you see, Gary, there...

Factory Worker: Why would anybody go around punishing themselves, just for the sake of the happiness of a few pets or...

Would you mind being quiet for one second, please!