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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Ways to make Christmas special for my [20F] mum [50F] when it might be her last one?
POST: My mum has lots of health issues and has been disabled (even though she doesn't look it) most of her life. She was hoping to get a lung transplant but due to everything she has the risk was too great, and without the transplant, if her health keeps deteriorating as it is now she was given 2 years to live just over a year ago.
This has been incredibly hard and I'm tearing up thinking about how this may be her last christmas. I'm at university but will be going home for the christmas vacation.
I want to get her something or do something for her that shows her how much I love her and appreciate her, and will always, always feel that way.
I was thinking of maybe something to do with photos of the family through the years, but I don't want to make her sad. She's generally very strong about it though, and is more upset that she won't get to see our lives and our futures.
I would really appreciate any ideas or advice, and if anyone has been through or is going through anything similar it would be nice to hear from you.
TL;DR: | It might be my mum's last christmas and I want to do something special for her. I'd appreciate any ideas or advice! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My ex [23F] started dating an older man 33
POST: So we've been broken up for about three months now but continued to talk in between week stretches of not talking at all. Just kinda confused, we broke up because she moved away to New York, for at least a year and the distance would be a problem (I'm in Atlanta).
However she kinda had been texted strangly so I asked if she was seeing someone else, she just said yea but not exclusively or anything. Since asking her that 3 weeks ago we've talked very little. The guy she is dating is 33 and lives in Savannah.
My issue is we broke up because of distance, yet she is now dating someone just as far away. I had wanted to try and reconnect but this leaves me hurting.
TL;DR: | Broke up b/c of distance, gf starts dating an older guy who lives just as far away, wanted to get her back but now don't know what to do |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Girlfriend (23) and I (24) just had a big political argument, and I'm getting the freeze out now.
POST: I've been dating this girl since end of May, though I've been courting (for lack of a better term) her since February of this year. We've known each other since August of last year. So basically, we've officially dated for 3 months, and have been friends for over a year.
Tonight we had a big argument about politics. It shouldn't have come up, but it did. Along the way, we argued about whether poor people are just lazy, whether there should be a flat tax, welfare, and the coup de grace, whether Obama is a citizen. I told her she was flat out wrong many times. But it also made her cry. I eventually ended the argument, but I should have shut it down way earlier. I tried to smooth things over before leaving her apartment. We get along just fine in every other aspect except for politics.
Now, I'm pretty sure I'm getting the freeze out. We had plans to go together to run some errands in the morning, but she's saying she can do them on her own now. I apologized to her now about letting our argument get that heated, and that I was a dick about certain points, but not sure if that's done any good.
Politics aside, because I'm still very convinced that I'm right, I don't know where to go with this. I do like her and all, but this cut off from communication is making me, well, anxious to say the least. Do I just need to wait for her to cool down? Sleep on it?
Anybody else been in a situation like this before?
TL;DR: | Had a big political argument, I told her she was wrong, she cried, and now we're not really talking. Not sure where to go from here. |
SUBREDDIT: r/books
TITLE: I was wondering if someone could clarify something about semi-rare book prices and sales
POST: Hi everyone, I'm a long time listener, first time caller.
A year ago a 4 volune set of my favorite tale, The Count of Monte Cristo, came into my possession. It's a 2nd edition 1892 Little Brown publication and each volume has green covers and intricate maroon stenciling.
Unfortunately I'm fresh out of college, in between jobs (read: a humanities major), and in need of some cash. I've sold off my old video games and have been in the process of documenting the value of my possessions.
This brings me to my question. Those 4 volumes are allegedly valued at $400-500 online, but honestly I have a hard time believing that. However, if this is true, I would like to sell them since I am most attached to the story and not the least bit bound by its binding.
My
TL;DR: | questions: how much are these books really worth (are the other sellers just greedy/optimistic), and how does one go about selling them? |
SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: How can I find something to look forward to?
POST: Right now I'm enrolled in a degree where I have to work pretty hard -- I leave the house at around 7am and get back at around 10:30pm, with pretty much all the intervening time being either class, study or public transport. This is pretty much the level which I need to be at to do well. But I'm not complaining about my degree -- I knew what I was getting into when I started, and I want to see it through.
The thing is, lately I've found it harder and harder to keep on going and life is a drag, because I feel like I have nothing to look forward to. I think I would be fine working as hard as I am now if I had something good coming up, but I don't. By the time I get home from class, I'm too tired to do anything other than browse the internet idly and then go to bed. My friends are all either in similar degrees or out of state, so I can only see them a few times a year. I have hobbies and I love music, but usually I'm either too tired, sleep-deprived or have too much work to do to enjoy them much.
I'd really like to find something healthy, because my current "thing to look forward" to is binge-eating awful food, which makes me feel terrible afterwards (and I usually starve myself the next day as punishment). I know the usual advice is to save an hour on the weekend to do something for myself, but one hour of free time just doesn't seem like enough to get excited about, especially since I usually spend most of such breaks either feeling guilty about not working or dreading getting back to work in 40, 30, 20 minutes...
Thanks in advance for any advice. Sorry for such a long post.
TL;DR: | life is a drag and I can't seem to find anything healthy to look forward to to keep me going. What can I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23 M] trying to date a good friend of mine who is [20 F] who has never had a boyfriend.
POST: The catch is that this girl is not someone who you would expect not to have a boyfriend. She is highly social, has lots of friends, and has had at least 5 different sexual partners (however not a slut, this is common of girls in sororities). She drinks a lot, and a couple of times she was drinking she has mentioned to me, while crying, that she is insecure about never having a boyfriend. However when she is sober she always tells everybody that she is glad she has never had one, although it is obvious that she is insecure about this fact. I have confronted her best friend about this, and she told me that her number 1 insecurity is never having a relationship with anyone.
This girl is a social monster, who is definitely hot, so it is really surprising to me that she has not had a relationship before even though she clearly wants one. Another surprising fact is that she is in the bitchiest sorority in my university, so that makes it even more odd cause there is a lot of social pressure for her to have one.
She is kind of a tomboy who gets along with guys better than girls, so this might be a factor. But I really like her, and I just don't know how to go about courting her. I am pretty sure she has shown interest, but I am kind of a pussy and am very confused.
TL;DR: | A girl that normally would have no trouble getting a boyfriend, has never had one (even though she has had multiple sexual partners), and is insecure about it. I really like her and don't know how to go about it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I'm going to blow my 10 years relationship away by telling the truth to my partner. Any advices ?
POST: **The Background**: 36 Yo Male redditor here. I've always been into girls. I've always see them as potential partner. I've always heated on pretty much every girls I've met for my whole life, yet, I believe i'm pretty good at reading signs and I stop before it becomes annoying (for the ladies or for my friends) (read : I strongly believe i'm not an asshole, but you decide)
I love the sensation of being usefull and providing emotional comfort to a woman and I try to leave my partners better and more secure than before I met them.
One day I met this girl who fell totally, unconditionally in love with me.
I was at a point in my life where I thought being into a committed relationship could cure the vast sentiment of loneliness I've always felt. And it worked in a way. Her unconditional love provides me security and confidence in life. We build things together (we have a daughter), and I feel useful securing her in almost every aspect of life.
**The story** : routine is now installed (almost 10 years together). I crave flirting (and fucking.. a little). I've been feeling miserable for almost 2 years. I can't stand it anymore.
So basically I have three choices :
* be miserable
* cheat on her and be miserable
* tell her everything and potentially lose her, destroy everything we've built, leaving my daughter with a distant father, and an depressive mother (also, be miserable).
Voila. I'm planning to tell it all quite soon.
Hopefully you have advices or similar stories.
TL;DR: | 36 yo male. In a relationship but can't stop flirting. Thought I would grow up but was wrong. Feeling miserable |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: How do i become closer friends with someone who has a lot of difficulty making close friends?
POST: * **If any of the two people referenced in this story read this PLEASE stop. You should know who you are. message me before and i will explain fully**
Alright so i was a senior and i just graduated, i'm not the sharpest tool in the shed and never claim to be, i'm a geek by all accounts but i'm fairly sociable for a geek i'm deep into tech and all kinds of bleeding edge stuff.
* Older brother = tom - 16
* Younger brother = neil - 15
*i would very much appreciate if i were not grammar nazi'd to death i get it, this is not a formal essay so please get off my back also names are redacted for privacy*
**Now to the question**
me and tom were friends starting early my senior year we got along all that time and i even went over to his house a few times and vice versa we get along very well (althow he shares some of what is described below but to a much lesser extent)
me and neil share a common group of friends and thus by association became friends ive always thought that neil was a pretty cool guy although its very obvious that he is extremely shy and doesn't like being a center of attention. normally i gravitate to the shy people because they always wind up being more trustworthy friends^in ^my ^own ^personal ^oppinion
I have tried on multiple occasions to try and spark a more open friendship between us but none have produced anything really... helpful but what I'm trying to do is maintain a friendship with both brothers at the same time and get on a more personal level with neil could anyone offer some tips on how to become friends close friends with someone who is extremely shy?
TL;DR: | = trying to make close friends with extremely shy younger teen (not my family) don't know how to become closer without sounding weird/desperate |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [21/m] Been dating my girlfriend (22/f) for a week, not sure if going too fast.
POST: Hey good people of /r/relationship_advice
I come with a question. I met an amazing girl at a mates party, though I've known about her for at least a year, we just really took off at the time. Talking with her showed that we shared a lot of things in common, in particular our background, as we both grew up around Russia before moving to New Zealand. We also shared the same family problems of our childhood, as well as a common interest in video games/movies.
Now, after the party I managed to build up enough courage to ask her out for a coffee, and she happily accepted. This is when I learned that I am very comfortable talking with her, to the point where I am happy to talk about things I've never discussed to anyone before. Personal things.
This is the tricky part, we have been dating for only a week, and the relationship is starting to get very very intimate (already we have had sex). We both don't want to rush things too much, but because we have so much in common it just feels like we've known each other for a very long time, and as a result can't control our affectionate feelings for each other.
My question is this, has anyone been in a similar situation? If so, then did you try to slow things down, or were you both happy to the point where you have been together for a long time?
TL;DR: | Found amazing girl that I share a lot in common with, have been dating for a week and am already up to sex, both don't want to rush it but feeling for each other too strong. Are we going too fast? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I(21M) got into a thing with a girl(24F) but she's leaving to another country soon.
POST: We met about 10 days ago, I felt immediate attraction, started chatting to her, turns out she's really smart, she understands my humour, we basically get along extremely well, better than I expected to get along with anyone.
3 days ago I went to her house to watch a film with friends, and when they all left we slept together on the couch basically kissing all night, nothing sexual.(One of those was also my first kiss ever)
Last night she stayed at my house and we fooled around, but neither of us actually finished, so we had to take a snack break, we then made out some more and slept, then in the morning we made out again, and I almost missed my bus to work.
Now the thing is, she's leaving to study abroad in 23 days, it happens to be a country I would also love to move to and plan on doing it(already learned the language), would it be completely crazy to go with her? I only met her because I moved to this current city kind of on impulse, only been here 3 weeks and it's been the best life experience so far, so I'm liking this impulsive version of myself.
I haven't actually talked to her about this, and I won't for now, she's playfully mentioned it herself, and she keeps asking me about my job and how it can be done from anywhere(I'm a software developer), but if the opportunity arises I would love to take it, it would even be an upgrade in terms of country(economy, social, higher wages, eduction, etc).
I'm basically looking for opinions on how to do it, but my plan is to continue as we are, worst case scenario she leaves and we had a wonderful month.
TL;DR: | moved to a new city, met girl on holiday, get along super well, she's going to another country in 23 days, I want to consider the possibility of going with her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: So I [16 M] went out with this girl [16 F] on 5-6 dates. We are just friends now but I still can't
POST: Ok so like the description said I went out with this girl on 5-6 dates. I thought everything was going good but we kinda just drifted apart about a month and a half ago. We're still friends and we still talk, but it's not as much as we used to. I thought I was over her but she told me that she's going out with another guy. Anyway ever since then I can't get her out of my head and the thought of her with someone else makes me get a knot in my stomach. I know that I'm still young and everything but I would really appreciate some advice about what to do. Thanks in advance.
TL;DR: | I can't stop thinking about this girl I used to go out with. Any advice you can give me would be great. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22 F] with a guy i was dating [24 M] for a couple months - Should I give up?
POST: I'm here in USA for the fall semester (exchange semester) and kind of dated a guy for a couple of months. We started out as fwbs and gradually developed feelings, I've met almost all of his extended family and his mom likes me a lot. I'm currently touring the west coast and will return to my own country at the end of this year.
We have talked about the possibility of long distance but he isn't able/haven't given me an answer. It's been a couple days and we haven't really spoken much. We aren't girlfriend/boyfriend (yet?) so it's all still super open-ended. I saw him online on facebook and tindr instead of calling me like he was supposed to. Should I give up or try to talk to him about the possibility of a long term relationship?
TL;DR: | Dated a guy for a couple months while on exchange, should I try to talk to him about long distance or give up? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My girlfriend [22f] has no self esteem because of my [22m] success
POST: So we've been dating for over a year and a half and I've been noticing this for awhile. (Side note, I don't mean for this to sound arrogant, I honestly just don't know what to do)
I'm about to graduate with my degree in film and she's about to graduate with her degree in sociology. In her eyes, film is much flashier that sociology is, so in her eyes, I'm more successful than she is.It's also because I'm pretty close to the top of my class where as she is more of an average student.
Honestly I can see where she's coming from but I don't think she sees all of her own talents. While I may be able to operate a camera or play a few instruments, she has a way to connect with people in pain and bring light into their world. She will sacrifice everything for other people.
I feel like those qualities are more important in the long run. Unfortunately she doesn't see it that way and instead feels like I'm just way out of her league, which isn't true. Is there anything I can do?
TL;DR: | SHE THINKS my life has been super blessed and successful, her's has not, how do I help her see how amazing she really is? |
SUBREDDIT: r/running
TITLE: Running related Anemia
POST: Hi Runnit! I just got diagnosed with pretty severe anemia and thought I should share my story with you.
I am a 26 year old, healthy female. I have never had any iron/hemoglobin issues in my life. I started running back in January of this year, quickly ramping up to about 20-30 mpw and have been there fore the last few months.
For last past weeks, I have been feeling tired, sleepy and out of breath. While I have never been a fast runner, my mile times have gotten slower and slower despite running 5 days a week. I have been assuming it was just a side effect of the heatwave we are having. I also started craving ice chips, A LOT. For the last week, I literally would take cups of ice and chomp on them all day long. Then someone mentioned that ice cravings are a symptom of iron deficiency.
I went to the doctor and got my blood work done. Turns out I was quite anemic. I am on iron tablets now and hopefully my blood work will look better in 2 month.
TL;DR: | If you are feeling really tired all the time, have weird ice chip cravings, and consistently really really shitty running, get your blood checked. You might be anemic. (Especially if you are female.) |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Has imgur ruined Reddit?
POST: [Throwaway account by the way] I understand that imgur is better for image hosting than what we had before, but I think we've become dependent on it for reasons other than hosting (mainly) original content. Too often people reupload images from sites to imgur robbing the original creator of internet traffic and recognition. It's also progressed the "dumbing down" of Reddit, which at any given time almost half (sometimes more) of the submissions are imgur links which more often than not are asinine. We've sunk low; what used to be a front page of news and discussion is now (mostly reposts at this point) funny/witty pictures, memes, and sensationalist headings. Sure I can stick to my obscure subreddits, but the main page represents the website and is ultimately what newcomers are drawn to. We need to get back on the horse; we're better than this.
TL;DR: | Imgur is slowly killing Reddit. [Frontpage a few years ago] notice the lack of memes, immature language, pointless screencaps, one-off images etc. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Can i message a girl(23w) i(m22) had a good time with before i got together with my ex or not?
POST: So right before i got together with my ex (we dated 28days) i got to know this girl via online dating.
We got off rly well but didnt meet during the time.
Things with my ex went very fast and i immediatly told her that i dont want to fool her(onlinedating one) and am not single anymore..
Well now i am again (2weeks ago..)
She messaged me how i am doing 3 weeks ago so i guess she didnt lose interest and was wondering if i am still in the relationship. Back then i told her that i just watched a movie with my gf..
The quesiton is can i message her a "Hey whats up" or is it just rude? (she could think she is a second choice) ?
TL;DR: | Broke up. Want to reinitate communication with girl i started to like before my ex? She knows that i had to "let her go" back then. |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: I have a friend who is drinking throughout her pregnancy. She is giving the baby up for adoption to a nice family, and they have no idea..
POST: Hello Reddit. Thanks for reading my post.
I have a friend (early 20's) who accidentally got pregnant 8 months ago. She didn't find out for a long time, and during that time, she was drinking extremely heavily and possibly using drugs. When she did find out, she continued to drink, even up to this day. She is going to give her baby up for adoption to a selected family. According to her, they are very nice and well-rounded, and are extremely generous to her. But they don't know that she has been drinking. So far the doctors are telling her the baby is 'healthy'.. but who knows what could turn out once the baby is actually born. The baby could have serious brain complications later in life (example: I know of a woman who used substances throughout her pregnancy and now her child has serious mood/mental problems as well as seizures).
I think this is extremely terrible not only for the baby but the family. I can't talk to her about this because she is stubborn and doesn't realize how bad this is. I feel extremely bad for the family because they are expecting a healthy baby from a seemingly nice and responsible young woman.
Is it my place to try and inform the adoption services or something? I don't know any information, and I would want to remain anonymous. If this is not my place to do so, then I won't. But I'm wondering what other people think.
TL;DR: | Friend is pregnant, giving the baby up for adoption. Drinking excessively throughout pregnancy. Can I do anything? (Other than talk to her about it, because that will not work.) |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: April Fools Joke on girlfriend goes horribly wrong... Reddit, who's the April Fool?
POST: On April 1st, I took a screenshot of my girlfriend's computer desktop. I put the screen shot as her desktop background and put the actual contents of her desktop in a folder located on her desktop. My plan was that she would click every icon to no avail, but when she clicked the folder (now the only active thing on the desktop) she would conveniently find all her icons and documents and even a message from me. I even put a JPEG image of her desktop next to the folder to clue her in when she thought something was wrong.
Unfortunately, things didn't go quite as I hoped. When nothing worked on her desktop, she blamed the folder that she had never seen before and deleted the folder without looking in it. Then she immediately emptied her trash.
Now, she's pissed at me because MY prank deleted all her files, and recovery software only saved four of them. I told her no person could ever foresee her making such rash decisions to troubleshoot a frozen desktop. Reddit, is this my fault?
TL;DR: | the classic desktop background as screen shot prank played on girlfriend. to troubleshoot, she deletes all her files. my fault?! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [20 M] with my boyfriend [19 M] 3months, I cheated on him and want to regain his trust
POST: Hi everyone, thank you for your help.
Basically, last night I admitted to my boyfriend that I cheated on him four times. I just feel so disgusted at myself. I love him so much yet I cheated on him. He made me feel so happy, yet I cheated on him. It broke his heart and I've never seen him been so hurt before I just felt so disgusted at myself. I love him so much and I'm willing to do anything to reconcile a relationship, even though it may never be the same, because I love him so much. I would do anything to prove myself worthy again. I just can't lose him and I love him so much.
Thank you for your help.
TL;DR: | I cheated on my boyfriend and I want to know how, no matter how arduous, that I can regain his trust back or work towards proving myself. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by finding a spastic cab driver
POST: TIFU
So this was about 1.5 yrs ago.
I am get a cab from my hotel to a military installation. This place is the type that does not allow you in without ID and a reason to be there. So I tell the cab driver he needs to drop me off in the front of the place at the taxi stand and to NOT approach the gate. I am half asleep cause it is 5 am. I am not paying total attention and look up, as we get to the base. He pulls in towards the gate. Now, one way to really tick off a guard, is to try to do a turn around ahead of the gate. It looks suspicious, they will not take it well, and will likely pursue you and be exceptionally unhappy with you. So we are now committed to driving to the gate to tell the guard my driver is a dumb ass. We get there, we have 4 visible guards, all of them armed with M4s. They signal for him to stop as we get to the gate. I am realizing now, he is sweating bullets and has a totally freaked out look on his face. He hits the gas instead of the brake, the engine revs, the car vaults forward, he hits the brake and stops 3 feet from the closest guard. I am screaming at him at this point to stop the F'ing car, and calling him every name I can muster. I realize all of a sudden that the guards (who are now ALL pointing their rifles at us), are also screaming at us. They yank us both out of the car, and over the next 20-30 minutes (felt like 3 hours) we are having a pleasant chat with them and their supervisor, before they clear us. They send him on his way and I get to go to work and explain to my boss why security called him about me. These guards don't mess around. It was very fortunate we did not get shot at. Another 100th of a second they would have opened fire on us and at that range, we would have been hamburger.
TL;DR: | UBER driver didn't listen to me, almost rammed the gate at a military installation and nearly got us both killed. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I'm a normal and levelheaded gal for most of the month...and then I turn into a monster.
POST: [Me: 21. Him: 22]
Hi Reddit! I have a little problem here that I hope most of you aren't too embarrassed to help me out with.
So the general gist, if you haven't gathered from the title of this post, is that while I like to think of myself as a relatively decent, slightly spacey girlfriend for most of the month, I react pretty badly to PMS. Basically, the week before my period, it sucks to be my boyfriend: I get pretty ridiculously jealous, and the slightest thing is likely to anger/annoy me. It took me forever to pinpoint my monthly mood swings to this, but now that I know, I was wondering if you guys had any advice on how to minimize this?
I know PMS is something that affects almost all girls to some extent or another, but I think it affects me particularly strongly. Giving my boyfriend (and myself) advance warning has helped a lot, but all that goes down the drain if my pms is compounded by stress as well (finals, applications, etc.). I know this puts a strain on my relationship, and besides, it sucks to feel like a bitch.
Sorry for weirding you out, boys of Reddit :)
TL;DR: | I'm a normal girlfriend who (and I acknowledge this) becomes a scary uberbitch once a month every month. Not placebo effect. What to do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: Not sure if what I want to do is acceptable in a woman's eyes. Need advice.
POST: I've [25/M] met this girl [20-21?/F] at my office building. She works as a barista in my office building and I frequent that coffee place regularly. Over the past few days I've come to talk to her more and in the process getting to know a little about her such as her name, education background, near-future plans, etc.
We are by no means considered friends yet but she does remember my order and we do greet each other whenever we bump into each other (we park on the same floor of the building).
I plan to ask her out but was also thinking of leaving a note on her car (using a receipt from my earlier purchase at the coffee place). The note is just to say thanks for the awesome coffee and that she'd have a wonderful weekend.
My dilemma is would it be seen as too much or creepy? She knows that I know which car she drives as we've seen each other in our cars while parking before. That being said, would it still be considered OK to leave a note on her car?
TL;DR: | Met a girl at a coffee place, talked a bit with her and plan to ask her out. Want to leave a thank you note on her car for the coffee but not sure if it's ok. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Girlfriend (F/19) hasnt texted/talked to me (M/20) in 3 days. Should I be worried?
POST: Weve been in a relationship for about a month and a half now and everything's been going pretty well. We haven't fought or anything either. She's about 6 hours away at the moment finishing up an internship with a police department and works 12+ hour days so I can understand not wanting to constantly text.
My last text from her was friday morning with her telling me when she was getting off work but since then nothing. She hasnt even been on steam. Should I be worried at all or am I just being a bit clingy about the situation?
TL;DR: | girl randomly has stopped talking/texting. should I be worried or is this her just being busy/overwhelmed. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I really need your help, reddit! I don't know what to do.
POST: I'm super paranoid about anyone finding out about this, so throwaway obviously, and I've changed a bunch of minor details in the story, but please don't upvote it because I'm worried it might still be recognizable.
About a week ago, I met my sister's clarinet teacher. As far as I can tell, she's pretty much awesome (the teacher, not the sister). She's smart, she's pretty, she's lively, and happy. If she wasn't like 8 years older than me (and married), I would have totally asked her out. But that's not a big deal, because I meet attractive women all the time, right?
But I've got a problem. When I was talking to her, I got a really magnificent boner. There's really no other way to describe it. I'd never had one like that before. After I got home, I tried to masturbate to porn but my mind kept wandering back to her. Jerking off while thinking about her felt dirty and I was so disgusted with myself that I didn't even finish.
The problem is that was my last erection. I used to masturbate three or four times a week, but I haven't been able to get hard since. Porn that I used to look at doesn't do anything for me now. Is this normal? I'm worried maybe I broke something by not finishing last time. How can I fix this? I really want to have kids someday :(
TL;DR: | I met my sister's music teacher and now I can't get an erection. This is really embarrassing and I can't talk to anyone about it, help! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: me [24f] can't stop thinking about co-worker 35 [m] yet in long term relationship with [25m]
POST: Not much to say here... I've been with my partner nearly three years. Thing have gotten stale.. we rarely have sex.. have lived together for a year and a half. Sometimes I still wonder why I'm with him because he plays video games 8 hours a day and largely ignores me. Recently I've met someone at work who flirts with me all day long. I can't get him out of my head. My BF and I have been going through a rough patch and have agreed to try and work on things.. I'm trying and so is he but still my co-worker is in my mind. How do I stop thinking about this guy from work? I doubt it's anything serious.. just so nice to have someone call me beautiful and flirt with me everyday. It's gotten to the point where I can't wait to go to my job that I hate just so that I can see my co - worker. Please help.. this is unfair to my boyfriend and I love him but I can't get this guy out of my head.
TL;DR: | in 3 year relationship with boyfriend. having issues... co -worker flirts with me all the time and I can't stop thinking about him. what do I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (f 20) bf (m 20) and I are competitive with each other to the point where it's often not fun playing games together. How do we work on this?
POST: I can understand if this is seen as very petty and silly, but we both love games a lot and this level of competitiveness makes it less fun to play together.
My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year, and were best friends for about a year before that. We always played a lot of video games together and were always relatively competitive there, but then I found the card game Magic: the Gathering (MTG).
I played for a while when we were friends, he wasn't interested for a long time, then he decided to give it a try. Things were fine (for me) because I was more experienced and he was a newbie, so I won a lot or he won when I let him.
Now it's been over a year and we're both on the same level of skill in MTG. We're both pretty serious about it, and while we haven't dumped hundreds of dollars into it like a lot of the pros, we do put effort into it and work on it together extensively. We both enjoy going to tournaments and playing against other people.
However, when we play together things can be difficult at times. If I lose I'm mad, and when he loses he gets mad. We've talked about it, and it's like we both expect going into the game that we're going to beat the other, then we get mad/disappointed that we didn't.
We play A LOT together, so it's not always like this, but the majority of the time it is. I don't get mad when I lose against my brother, sister, or other people at tournaments. Just my boyfriend. :/ He says it's the same for him too. It just makes it less and less fun to play together, and more of an ordeal.
What's going on here? Neither of us can come up with an idea as to why. :/ And how do we work on it? Any advice/opinions greatly appreciated!
TL;DR: | bf and I are competitive to the point where it's not as fun playing games together. Why are we so competitive with each other and how can we work on it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by marrying a girl on Facebook
POST: Hi Reddit, this happened yesterday but I know you don't care so.. Anyways there's this really cute girl who's a mutual friend of some of my friends I've known for a few years. We were all talking in a group chat, and I slid in her DMs and got her number. Everyone in there was pretty much shipping us and what not so I just went with it, I mean they were helping me out so whatever.
One of her girlfriends was like "she's your bae now, you should make it Facebook official!" Then, the girl I'm flirting with said I should marry her on Facebook so I said fuck it, send the request. I accepted it and went to bed because it was 4AM and I was exhausted. Didn't realize I had fucked up until I woke up the next morning..
I had hella messages, Facebook notifications, and unread texts. I started checking them and that's when shit got hilariously awkward. My fuckin family thought I legitimately got married and were PISSED they didn't get invited to the wedding.
My grandma was texting everyone in my household trying to figure out why her grandson got hitched before he leaves for USMC recruit training. I thought that was bad enough but then my recruiter texted me asking if I really got married, and I had to explain to my family (in Spanish) that this was all just a joke and I'm only talking to this girl.
TL;DR: | married a girl on Facebook, my family and recruiter thought I got married for real. Had to message them and explain that it was just a misunderstanding. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Update 1:Me [25 M] with my GF [23 F] of 3.5 years, she is coming home from internship (3 months) on monday - problem arising
POST: This is an update to:
So we talked it out on saturday, both said that we love each other and no hard feelings were left.
I pick up her sisters and her cousin. We drive to the airport. I got roses. Champagne, roses, and two shrimpcocktails at home.
We pick her up. Kisses, hugs, etc.
We drive home... She tells me she got a job offer there. She got no feelings left for me - and she is 100% sure that feelings wont grow back even though we had 3 months apart. She has flirted with some guy there (says she haven't done anything with him).
I did not really see this fucking bomb coming. I'm broken, completely fucking broken.
I threw her out in the middle of the night. Couldn't fucking stand her. Her sister picked her up. I told her "you ain't staying another hour here"
She is coming by tomorrow so that we can start pack all the stuff up. Im fucking devastated.
Im gonna be so lonely. :(
How do I go on with my life? I need to find my soulmate, which I thought was her. How do people even find anyone new? I guess most people will say: throw friends. Sad thing is I have only a few close friends. Especially now since most are disappearing with / in combination with her.
TL;DR: | She dumped me, said she had no feelings left. Had flirted with other guys. Got a job offer at her internship. I'm lonely, crying. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [21M] mother [43F] is strongly leaning toward starting the process to adopt a child. If a child is placed with her, how can I foster a positive relationship with my adoptive sibling?
POST: I'm the oldest of four (Me, 19F, 17M, 14M). Our mother has been in a serious relationship with "William," who has no children. They've discussed and intend to pursue adopting a child under five years old, as he wants children, but my mother is surgically sterile.
My siblings and I are very close. We haven't necessarily "been through a lot," but, as children, we moved about a dozen times and saw our mother with many different men. We had to make new friends each time we moved, and mom's financial situation fluctuated, so the only real static we've had throughout our lives has been each other.
By the time my mother and William would have the child, only one of us would be living at home, and he'd probably be 16 or 17 years old. I do not envision a scenario where we could ever see the child as "one of us," but the child isn't the one choosing the family, she it shouldn't have to suffer for it. With that in mind, what can I (and my siblings) do to make this child feel like he/she is just one of us.
Of course, to further complicate matters, neither I nor my sister intend to live anywhere in the area by that point.
TL;DR: | Mom is adopting kid 10-15 years younger than the rest of her kids. How can we be as close as possible with said child? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Stop beating around the bush: parents, you do have a favorite child don't you?
POST: I know you do. I know that both of my parents love me, but it is very obvious that each one has a favorite. My parents are divorced and my older brother and I always have gone back and forth weekly between houses. He is a more passive personality (calmer and more sensitive) and I am the funnier more rambunctious smart ass. He's pretty factual and sciencey but I am more creative and more into reading, creative writing, and art.
To put it plainly, I'm my dad's favorite and my brother is my mom's favorite.
It has never been outright said, but it is obvious from the hints dropped. My mom often has compared me to my brother; for example when I got my learners permit she said more than once that, 'your brother never drove like that' or 'your brother never went that fast'. She also pays much more attention to him. I talk a lot, and he doesn't, so when I talk to my mom she usually tunes me out almost nonstop. Everytime I ask her a question I will ask it four times until she finally responds.
My dad is the opposite. He is much more affectionate and supportive to me than he is to my brother. I spend a lot more time with my dad than my brother does and we get along much better.
TL;DR: | Basically I know my parents have favorites, and I am fine with it. Do all parents have favorites? If so, why? |
SUBREDDIT: r/jobs
TITLE: Know of any reproductive medicine/biology or cosmetic research labs in Ohio or Texas?
POST: I have a bachelor's in biology with 3-4 years academic research lab experience and was accepted into 4 PhD programs last year; however, I just couldn't figure out what I would do with a PhD so I deferred. Almost a year gone and I STILL can't find any career ideas. So I come to you, Reddit, for some direction...
I love research but hate dealing with patients so becoming a physician is out. I am most fascinated by reproductive medicine/biology in terms of spermatogenisis and fertilization (this is the field I was going to get a PhD in). I have always been a little intrigued by the idea of working for a cosmetic research lab. Trouble is, I have not had any luck finding any sort of company or lab that work on these except for the occassional academic research lab in a university. My main goal is to find an intellectually stimulating and fascinating job in bio/biomedical research that pays at least decently if not well. The main reason why I deferred from the PhD program was not finding examples of careers that utilized a PhD that paid more than $45-50K a year. Grad school just doesn't seem worth it for so little compensation for the training.
So, Reddit, any ideas...?
TL;DR: | Anyone know of any non-academic research companies/labs that work with reproductive biology or cosmetic research in Ohio or Texas? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Parenting
TITLE: Taking two toddlers on a cruise?
POST: Looking for some advice: My father-in-law just invited my family to go on a cruise with him, and my husband and I are debating how practical that would be. We have two toddlers - a just-turned-one-year-old (14 months) and a not-quite-three-year-old (34 months). The cruise is in a month, so add that to their ages. Some things to consider:
* The older one is completely potty trained, and we use cloth diapers on the younger.
* Older girl loves swimming, younger is barely warming up to the bathtub.
* Both are very physically capable. The younger one can walk very well and crawl up and down stairs fairly confidently.
* Both like to meet new people and situations, but the younger one is very mommy-clingy at the moment.
* We're behind in the kids' vaccinations (we moved and I've had health issues and life has been crazy; we're working on it), and I don't know how much a concern that would be.
Neither my husband nor I have ever been on a cruise before, but my father-in-law and his wife do them all the time and would love to spend time with their grandbabies. It sounds like it could be a lot of fun, but it also sounds like it could be a lot of stress, and we just don't know whether or not it would be worth it.
TL;DR: | Considering taking a one-year-old and a three-year-old on a week-long cruise. Anyone have experience or thoughts to contribute? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [17M], my friend [16F], id like to be more than friends but circumstances aren't great.
POST: So I'm falling for my friend, who has a "thing" with another guy. I say "thing" because they are close friends, aren't dating but I'll call it a "thing" because that's what she called it.
I think she knows I like her, all our coworkers and a few school friends have asked if we're dating or when I'm going to ask her out. But this "thing" with the other guy is killing not only her, but me. It's constantly up, down, up, down, from one week to the next.
I don't know what to do.. I don't want to ask her out and completely weird things out. That's what I'm really worried about. But Im afraid if I wait to long, this other guy might pull through.
I thought she was interested in me because she's always staring at me in the halls, seeking me out at work, we text a lot, snapchat a metric fuckton, she's always looking down at my chest, and just the way she acts around me, but I'm starting to think she may be just keeping me around for attention or a back up plan.
TL;DR: | I don't know what to do/think about a girl I like who has a "thing" with another guy. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [27] with internet stranger [~31 M] chatting for more than a month and i have developed feelings for him. Please help
POST: Hello everyone,
This is my first post here and i am using a throwaway account for obvious reasons.
I have a very disturbed relationship with my SO [32 M] so and due to some dependency i can't breakup with him. things are so bad that i am almost depressed. Long back while discussing the current situation on one of the reddit forums, i started chatting with a fellow redditor. It started with usual relationship issues and than extended to discussing our daily routines. I was so involved texting him that would super lengthy essays discussing each feeling of mine in detail and would always receive a very supportive reply everytime.
This continued for more than a month, It was like I would keep checking my account to see if i have received anything from the other party and that message symbol turning red would make me jump out of joy. Basically i was anxious all the time and wanted to talk more and more. I was experiencing the comfort of sharing things with someone again which i had missed for years.
Now after a while i feel guilty and unethical for actually talking to a stranger, when i have a relationship running. Its nothing like i want to get into a relationship with this internet stranger or i have fallen for him, but just want to be in contact with him. May be have a healthy friendship. At the same time i really don't know what is going on his mind? Our texts have reduced from 2-3 days and it is disturbing me.
Do you think i should confess about my friendship thing to him? Or should simply delete my account and get back to lonely self again?
Please suggest i have come here with high hopes.
Sorry for poor English, It is not my native language.
TL;DR: | Conduct with internet stranger, should i tell him that how good i feel after talking to him or should i just let him go and get back to depression? |
SUBREDDIT: r/running
TITLE: 100 mile month help
POST: Hey runners I need some advice,
I want to do a 100 mile month at some point next year. If I run every day it would be a little over a 5k. But running everyday I heard is bad for knees. I used to do a 5k every other day for a few weeks but rain caused my trails to get really flooded and after coming back my vacation trip abroad I've been having trouble running regularly pluses darkness and stuff. The only time I run a 5k is with the run club at work every Wednesday. My goal from start of January is to run more regularly. At Least a 5k if not 4 mile run every other day. My main worry are my knees. Would running that much do damage to my knees or other parts of leg(Achilles, calf, etc.). To give you a background of myself. I was way overweight 184 I'm 5'7" and right now I'm around 160-164 running was a big part of that. I also did some strength training and went through a brief period of not eating junk food and drinking lots of water. I kind of fell off the wagon started eating junk and improper diet but I'm back to eating right foods and drinking water. I caught the running bug and can't wait to get out for a good run. But I did notice my knees hurting on a trip. I've never been more active in my life than this past year so I feel this much movement is causing my knees to hurt a little bit. So I was hoping to get some advice on training and stuff for this 100 mile month and how to work up to it
TL;DR: | want to do a 100 mile month. Worried about knees and other leg parts(Achilles, calfs, hamstring, acl, etc.) need some tips and Advice to achieve it or work towards it |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I[24M] remain friends with this girl [24F] who has a boyfriend?
POST: Hey guys. I met this girl about a year ago and we got along fairly well. Eventually I developed feelings for this girl. So following the advice I found here: I decided instead of being friends, to tell her how I felt. Unfortunately, she had a boyfriend. No biggie, time to move on.
I stopped hanging out with her. However, after a couple months, she sent me a text asking how I was and and wanting to hang out. So I caved and hung out with her. Turns out she still has the same boyfriend. She still wants to hang out with me because she enjoys my company and wishes to continue seeing me, either as a pair or with mutual friends.
It hasn't really been long enough for me to get rid of my feelings. She also understands I like her, and how I feel like I'd make a bad friend as long as I like her. Yet she still wants to be friends and hang out. Why does she want this despite knowing how I feel? What would this achieve?
Should I try to be friendly and just go back to where we were a couple months ago? Or should I stick with my original decision of no contact. I'm still not satisfied with just being friends and I can very easily see myself resenting this fact and her, which I dont think is fair to her. Do I tell her that we still can't hang out because of my feelings despite her really wanting us to remain friends?
TL;DR: | told a girl my feelings, but she had a boyfriend. stopped all contact because I'd didn't want to be just friends. 2 months later, she contacts me, still wants to be friends. what to do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/legaladvice
TITLE: Arbitration proceedings - First new car - intermittant transmission problems - potentially dangerous...
POST: It was suggested that I repost this here, so here it is!
So, my wife and I bought a car back in February of 2013 at a local dealer in NYC. A Dodge Dart Rallye edition, we both loved the look, the specs, and the price wasn't too bad either (We actually paid the whole thing off just last month!!) But here's the problem, I was stupid and didn't listen to my wife when she noticed the problem, probably during the first month of ownership. The engine would rev well past 4000 RPM while releasing the break at a stop light/sign. It wasn't until months later that I experienced the same thing, so we brought the car in to the dealer and had them take a look. Fast forward through 11 visits for the same problem, three replacements of the Transmission Control Module, a full on Transmission replacement including the flywheel, and 5 visits having the car held for days, sometimes over a week, and then having it returned with the dealer basically saying "we couldn't replicate the problem so there is no problem." I entered into arbitration with the National Center for Dispute Settlements, and just got a Manufacturer's Response Form from Chrysler which basically says "you're still driving the car so there's no problem with it." The last time the issue occurred, the engine redlined – hit 7k RPM after releasing the break at a red light, and actually lurched forward and coasted at 5mph to a bus stop that I pulled over to. I'm honestly afraid that one day I'll end up in the middle of an intersection and get t-boned by a bus or worse that a pedestrian is going to run across the street in front of me when this happens and I'll just mow them down… This isn't the final stage of the arbitration process, the panel still needs to review everything, but I have until Friday at midnight to respond to Chrysler's response. Any suggestions as to what I can say to the arbitrators? It's not like I want them to fork over a Viper or something, I just want a car that I can feel safe driving in, one that I don't need to bring into the dealer every two months for the same damn problem.
TL;DR: | Bought a car, missed out on Lemon Law, intermittent – potentially dangerous problem, manufacturer says it drives so no problem, arbitration to occur soon. Suggestions for response to manufacturers response? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My[20 F] best friend [24 M] just told me he's in love with me. He's in the Military and that scares me.
POST: I met Dalton at school last year and we quickly became best friends. I hang out with him at least once a week, we talk every day and I love him as a person.
We've each had our own relationships during our friendship but now for the first time ever, we are both single at the same time.
Two weeks ago, he told me that he loves me, that he's loved me since we met and that he's only been dating other people because I was never available and he wanted to respect that I had a boyfriend.
If Im being perfectly honest, I have always found myself attracted to him and it made me happy to hear him say that. I absolutely would want to pursue something with him.
That being said, I just got out of a two year long relationship. Im still mourning the loss of that love and am no where near ready to start something with Dalton. I told him as much and he said he understood and would be there for me when I was ready.
When I am ready to start something though, I have a pretty big concern: Dalton is in the Military. He's seen combat. During our friendship he's told me a lot about war, and a lot about the kinds of things that he's done. He's talked about his PTSD and the kinds of things he still does while asleep (for example, he sleep walks and apparently has managed to open his gun safe, get his gun, open his ammunitions safe, and load his weapon, all without waking up). He's also told me that if there is another war, he will absolutely do whatever he can to go back and fight again.
Honestly Im scared shitless about all of this. Its not a deal breaker for me, but I have no idea how to prepare myself for what this kind of relationship might be like.
I dunno. I guess Im hoping for people who have been in this situation before to share their stories... maybe give me advice on how to be supportive and helpful and how to keep myself safe.
TL;DR: | Id like to start a relationship with someone in the Military. This is uncharted territory for me and Im hoping for advice from those who have been there. |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: "The Grass is Always Greener" - Career advice from those who went to college after university
POST: Hi everybody!
I'm a 24 year old female living in Ontario, Canada - and, like many in my generation, have gone through years of university only to come to the end of it wondering what the point was.
A bit of background on my education and work experiences:
My undergraduate degree is in Environment and Resource Studies and my graduate degree is a Masters of Environmental Studies (Tourism Policy and Planning Program). Although I recently moved out of my parent's house, I lived with them throughout my schooling and have thus graduated debt-free. I have worked as maintenance at a conservation area, as an administrative assistant within the university, and as an intern with a regional tourism organization. Social media has (almost without my awareness) become my only tangible 'skill' (if a skill it can be called).
I am currently watching the job market and applying regularly to positions which I feel suit my current background. Despite having worked hard and applied myself to my schooling all these years, however, I routinely wonder what I actually offer to the world and yearn to see something concrete come out of my future work efforts.
I've always had a fascination with the skilled trades, but in high school felt like I was too dumb and awkward to ever pursue them. Now I have more confidence in myself and want to expand beyond mere book learning into the practical arts. I strongly respect people who are able to create things with their hands and desperately want to get away from the empty arrogance of academia.
Clearly, I'm searching for the polar opposite of the lifestyle/mindset that I've known for so many years. Am I just suffering from a case of 'the grass is always greener' on the other side of the fence? Am I wrong to want to pursue another line of work outside of the desk job? Any advice is much, much appreciated.
TL;DR: | I've just graduated university with no practical skills and am fantasizing constantly about going to college to learn a skilled trade. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [M 22] and cheating on my girlfriend [F 22] because I need new experiences.
POST: I met my girlfriend, Amanda, in high school. We dated through high school and university. I love her I really really do. She is literally a part of me. She knows parts of me better than I know them.
But being together for so long (approx 7 years) has taken a toll on me. I never really got to experience what it was like to be with other people. I'm not talking in a purely sexual sense. I want to be with other people and see what they have to offer me, what experiences I can have, what new things I can learn from them, etc.
Amanda and I decided to do some more school and moved to separate but close cities. We've both been really busy and we haven't had as much time to see each other.
Earlier on in the year, I met Zoe. I was immediately attracted to Zoe, and it was clear she was attracted to me. We hung out as friends a couple times, and started getting close. One night, we kissed, and I let her sleep in my bed that night. We made out and I ended up cheating on Amanda. Zoe and I are still seeing each other, and she knows about Amanda. Neither of us want to fight our feelings.
Zoe has travelled, and has different interests than I do. She is something new, something that isn't me, and that is what I have been wanting. Not just someone new, but something new. Something to better myself, something adventurous.
Its eating my up inside, because I feel as though I need this experience, but Amanda deserves so much better than this. I want to tell her, but I will lose her and Im not sure I can lose a part of me.
What should I do? I don't want to be complacent, but I'm not sure letting Amanda go is the right thing. We have so much vested in each other.
TL;DR: | Cheating on my girlfriend because after 7 years I feel like I need new and different experiences. Don't want to lose her, but can't keep doing this to her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [25F] and my husband [24M] of 6 months, together 8 years, have started talking about having kids. It isn't going well...
POST: We both want kids and discussed it before marriage. So the other day I started the conversation seriously because we had never gotten to the real nitty-gritty of it. Clearly, it made him uncomfortable to talk about having kids in any real sense (it's always just been "yes we want kids some day"). We had talked previously about having them when I turn 26 which is September of next year, and when I put it that way he immediately didn't like that idea.
His barriers are that he wants to start grad school (MBA in Finance) part time, while working full time and that would be too much. I'm not against him going to grad school, and he gets tuition reimbursement so the loans won't even be that bad, but I feel like it's an excuse. Like he's scared, and is just putting it off.
We are financially pretty comfortable (both of us work full time), own a home, have a great support network (his parents, siblings, etc.), with money leftover for savings and fun at the end of the month. I tried to logically lay all that out and he still wouldn't budge or even seem to hear my perspective.
Recently, I definitely got a case of the baby rabies, but I don't want to conceive right away, just within the next year or so. When I finally broke down and brought up the emotional side of this, he immediately shut down and turned the conversation into a fight because "that's not fair!"
We worked it out to the point that we weren't crying and yelling, but no other resolution. I'm a little resentful that my husband has so many excuses and no solutions.
TL;DR: | I want kids within the next year, my husband isn't ready because he "wants to start grad school" but hasn't even written an essay/taken the GMATs/talked to his employer about reimbursement. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How to handle a job situation...advice?
POST: So heres the situation. I recently accepted a job offer...yay!, but heres the deal. The job is pending on a drug screen and background check, we'll leave that for a second. My question is this, what is the protocol in this situation? I am currently still taking phone interviews and have a second interview lined up. I like my current job and would prefer it over the others but I guess I'm curious if theres a proper way to contact hr and find out if all my background screening has been completed successfully before i cease continuing to interview.
Back to the other thing...I don't think i should fail any part of the screening, drug or backgroun...but there is a small chance of things going awry.
TL;DR: | waiting for background screening to be done before ceasing job search. Can I contact hr in a way not sounding suspicious to find out if i passed before i cancel other job opportunities. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How are you supposed to feel towards someone after 10 years?
POST: Me [M26] and my wife [F25] have been together without a breakup for 10 years. Those playing at home, we started dating at 16 and 15, respectively. After we got married in 2011 I thought it was the best decision I've ever made. We don't have any kids and have gone on several trips together since then. However, in the past year, I've been feeling very depressed, so much, I've gotten medication to try to help it. However, I've never told anyone this, but I feel my depression is caused by disappointment in the day to day relationship with my wife. Now that were in our mid twenties, we both work quite a bit and see each other mostly in the evenings.
Lately, whenever I see her, I have almost no emotion or feelings of excitement when she is around. I have frequent thoughts of being with someone else, but I've never acted upon it because I know it's wrong. I can't help it, I have a deep feeling of loneliness when my wife is around and I don't feel its normal.
After 10 years together, am I crazy to think I should be feeling the same "tingles" I felt when we were young, or is a feeling of "that's how it is" normal after a long term relationship? I just feel were roommates more than lovers anymore and it bums me out.
Please, tell me how one should feel towards their partner after being in a long term relationship.
Thanks.
TL;DR: | I've known my wife 10 years and I'm not sure if it's normal to not feel any kind of "tingle" or excitement when she is around. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24M] with my gf [23F] and her friend's[24F] combined birthday present
POST: So I'm wondering if I can get some advice on this situation. I planned to buy my girlfriend tickets to a concert she's been doing to go to for months but couldn't get tickets. So I bought some (about 200 dollars a piece) tickets for her and her friend. I have my girlfriend her ticket for our 1yr anniversary and I split the other ticket with this friends girlfriends (they gave me about 75 dollars). Anyways I planned it so they both don't have to work late the night of the concert or early the next morning. Then after this birthday weekend of hers where the friend got her ticket she says she can't go. So now since she doesn't want to go she wants to sell the ticket back to me or my girlfriend so that I can go to the concert instead even though I paid for it originally. So I'm kinda pissed off this girl is trying to charge me for a ticket I paid for because she doesn't wanna go even though it's a concert she wants to go to and can.
TL;DR: | bought some expensive concert tickets for gf and friend. Friend can't go and wants me to buy ticket off her since she doesn't want to go anymore (double paying) |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [22F] found my BF's [28M] OKCupid account and I've felt uneasy since then. How should I proceed?
POST: I was sitting at his desk, he was 4ish feet away on his bed. I was messing with a ruler, measuring the screen, being dumb. I didn't know it had a touchscreen, so it opened something. From there, I proceeded to play with it. Opening tabs and then the first web page on his frequently visited in Google, which was OKCupid (that's not how we met). He said it was from before we started dating, but while I was there I saw that he still gets messages from it. It's been bothering me to the point that I wonder if he sees a future with me, and if he's shopping around for someone else. I want to talk to him about it, but I don't know how to handle it.
TL;DR: | My boyfriend watched me open his OKCupid accidentally on his laptop and now I wonder if he doesn't see a future with me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU By getting angry at a Train Station
POST: It was a normal day for me, getting home on the train after a long day of work at college. I was a bit late when I had arrived to the station after waiting for my friends to stop talking to this girl we had met. Now at this train station, there is a gate which you must put in your ticket and the gate will open. When I arrived, so did the train so I became a bit paranoid whether or not I will be able to make the train or wait an hour for the next one to arrive. Now being me, I am incredibly impatient and I am not going to wait an hour for a train which will take 15 minutes to take me home. So I approach the machine and put my ticket into the machine, but it would not fit (that's what she said). At this point I was panicking as I watched my mates go through the gates and watched me as I continued to struggle putting my ticket into this what seems to be a faulty machine. The train arrived and there is a 30 second delay for when the doors open and I was still at the gate trying both sides of my ticket. I was getting furious and worked up (over a little thing yes, I was very impulsive) and with everyone looking at me in confusion to why I was getting so angry. At this point I look up and see my friends laughing at me for some reason and it was apparent I was doing something wrong. As it turned out, I had spent the last 15 seconds of my life putting a ticket... into a "No Entry" gate. I held my head in shame as the numerous pairs of eyes watched me as I enter the train, and my friends laughing at me.
This will never be let down...
TL;DR: | Late for the train, got impulsive and angry at a "No Entry" machine which would not accept my ticket. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: (update)Me [18F] with my bf [24M] of 6 months sexting 'bad'
POST: Original Post
So I came clean to my bf. He was a bit upset about the picture but mainly because the guy lived in our same city. We've talked about it and his only rules are no nudes and no going out to fuck them (which i never would do).
I did ask about other rules and told him how my messaages sound. He said message content was up to me.
I know a lot of you were concerned about the age difference. My first bf (now ex) is 29, i was with him when i was 17. I like older guys because I find those closer to my age are not mature enough. This is not just a "kink based relationship". We have shared interested that are outside of the bedroom.
And thank you to those who were not quick to bash me.
TL;DR: | bf and i have agreed what things are allowed. he wasn't upset until mention of picture, all has been resolved |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [26M] with my ex-girlfriend [26F], recent breakup, she asked to stay over a couple days next month
POST: To elaborate, she currently lives in southern CA and I in northern CA. She is enrolled in the online cohort of a university of here and apparently there is a mandatory meeting of some sort in November. Thus, she asked if she could stay at my place. "You'll barely see me since I'll be gone to the meeting" she said.
I had mixed feelings from the second she asked to stay. The breakup was kinda rough because we had been together for six years, and I didn't want to take a step back so to speak, by having her stay around and reintroducing the emotion that was between us. It was my first relationship and thus a difficult breakup.
One mistake I made was, after the breakup, trying to be as compassionate as possible and remain friends with her, and offer to help wherever I could. So I really set myself up for this situation.
Ultimately I told her I'm not comfortable with her staying here, even if we barely see each other, because of what I mentioned earlier that it will bring back those emotions. I'm in graduate school right now too, so the less distractions the better.
Obviously she wasn't ok with it and had a pretty emotional response, now I feel guilty, but I'm trying to stay firm on this.
I'd like some input on whether I made the right decision here. Also, I was thinking of reaching out to her when she is here, just to meet and chat in public, though that would seem to have the same negative effect I mentioned. What do you all think? I appreciate your responses in advance.
TL;DR: | broke up with gf of six years recently, she asked to come over and stay at my place out of convenience because she has to attend a school meeting nearby. I said no. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [21M] girlfriend [21F] always spills secrets when drunk; how do I resolve this?
POST: Going to try and keep this short. We've been dating for 6 months, and have a great relationship. Sober she's great. Drunk she's also great, but she has a bad habit of telling people things that were supposed to stay between her and I. Lastnight I hosted a party, and my good friend who's going through a hard time came over. I told her what was going on with him about a month ago, and explicitly said that she can't tell anybody, him included. At the party she walks over to him whilst drunk and says "Oh, I heard about such and such, I still think you're a good guy." He pulled me aside, and said that brought his night down, understandably.
This is probably the third time she's done this now. It only happens when she's drunk. When I approached her lastnight, she apologized, however I told her she's making me feel like I can't confide in her and tell her things in fear that she'll tell others when drunk. How do we move forward?
TL;DR: | Otherwise great relationship with girlfriend turns sour when she's drunk; has habit of telling people things I told her in confidence. How do we fix this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me[27M], my friend [26F] told me she likes when guys make her chase them.
POST: I'm really into this girl and have been for a while but have been unable to bring myself to do anything about it, fearing the worst and losing my best friend. We hang out maybe 1-5 times every 2 weeks and when we do it's the most fun I have! I really look forward to it every time. We also text nearly every day and talk about what's going on in our lives.
A week ago, while out with her and a few of her friends, some guy was hitting on her and one of her girl friends caught a slightly disappointed look on my face when I glanced up and noticed. She called me outside to talk to me immediately and confronted me about it. She told me not to tell this girl how I feel because I'm not her type. She said this girl is into jerks/assholes and that I'm too much of a nice guy. This was confirming all of my assumptions and worst fears. My friend has even told me that she dated douchebags mostly, even before they break her heart she know's their jerks.
Being the idiot that I am, this talk with her friend shattered all hope I had been carrying around, hope that someday the relationship would change into a romantic one. I've never felt worse in all my life, as if she'd already rejected me, and I still am having trouble getting over it. Strangely though, I'm now more motivated than ever, and I've decided to try to make a change. I want to take a shot instead of live life with this regret and frustration.
So my friend told me several months ago that she'd be awesome at getting chicks if she was a dude because she'd get them to chase her unlike all the guys who hit on her. I don't know if she was telling me this just to help me do better with girls, or she was just trying to give me a hint in how to attract her, but either way I feel like this might be my best approach with her.
My question is basically what can I do to try to get her to chase me? Any suggestions would be helpful. Thanks!
TL;DR: | My friend likes when guys get her to chase them, rather then the other way around. I want her to see me as more than a friend, and not sure how to change the dynamic of our relationship! |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Side projects at work
POST: First off, I'm a programmer. I like to design and build my own programs. But that's not my job - my job is to sit at my desk and investigate problems regarding servers, as sent to me via e-mail.
Now though, I've gotten a very quiet, discreet invite from my boss to join a programming side project. Supposedly short term, but it could be an excellent way to pad my resume and help earn myself a raise, so I accepted. But i was asked not to tell anyone else in our team, save the two others who were invited. That seemed reasonable - no need to create resentment for getting a change of pace.
However, I've been making discreet inquiries about the subject of our programming project, and it sounds like this "short term" project could last quite some time. Now I'm nervous - it sounds like it could eat quite a bit of my time, and I have a 4-month-old daughter to help take care of. At the same time, I won't deny we could use the money.
TL;DR: | Supposedly short-term project sounds like it will last a while, worried it will eat what little time I get with my wife and daughter. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by making a casual cancer reference in front of one of the company directors
POST: Happened about 5 minutes ago and don't really fancy having this on my main account.
I work at a fairly small consultancy and I'm sat at a desk next to one of the directors when he chuckles at computer shaking his head. I ask him what's up, and he replies, "It's ridiculous that on LinkedIn, you can enter a project end date as far in the future as 2065 - I'll be nearly 90 by then!". I swiftly responded with "yeah that is pretty crazy...unless you were like, working for [Cancer Research] or something". The exchange ended there.
It was a pretty poor response in any case, but the fact that his wife died of cancer last year made it 100x worse. He's gone to get lunch.
TL;DR: | Made a light-hearted reference to cancer to one of the directors at work; his wife died of cancer last year. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by being the luckiest man alive
POST: Went to a local business award dinner with my wife and a friend.
It was in the evening at a hotel in a downtown area. We get to the hotel, and go into the parking garage. We're about 30min late at this point. It's packed. We get to the top floor of the garage and realize there's no more open spaces. As we're backing down, we see one and zip in.
As we park we see another mutual friend, we jump out of the car to say hi. We grab our stuff and head downstairs to the event.
After the event we walk to a local bar to chat a bit more with another mutual friend. After a few minutes we decide to leave. The bar is a bit of a walk, and the ladies are in uncomfortable heels so they ask me to get the car from the hotel and pick them up.
After I pay for the drinks, I realize I don't have the car key. Odd. I assume I gave it to my wife. She disagrees. We check her purse. No keys.
We assume they fell out at some point, and start to retrace our steps.
My wife and our friend go to the front desk and tell them we lost our keys. I split up and head to where the event was. It's all locked up. Fuck.
Ok, so I decide to at least see if the car is still there... It's a newish Mercedes C300, so if somebody saw that key on the floor it's pretty tempting to just take the car as opposed to turn in the key.
I take the elevator to the floor we parked on, and open the door to the garage. It's getting late so there are almost no cars remaining. I turn a corner to get to where we parked and I see the car is still there. Oh man. Light are on. I get closer. It's running. I get closer, it's unlocked.
I text my wife a picture of the car with the caption. "If you want a divorce, I totally understand."
TL;DR: | I left my Mercedes unlocked and running in a downtown parking garage for several hours, and it was still there when I got back. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: How do I (18M) deal with finding out that my girlfriend (18F) started cutting again after 8 months?
POST: So, when my girlfriend (let's call her M) and I started dating, she cut once due to depression issues and I saw it. M said that she would never do it again because of how hurt I was by it. Fast forward a few months and M and I are using the L word. Also, M constantly makes reference about how I "saved her from herself."
Last night (we have now been dating for 8 months) we were talking on the phone. Things have been a little rocky lately due to M having depression issues again. While on the phone, I tried helping her out and we started having a breakthrough and she tells me that she just cut herself while on the phone with me. I was devastated and told her that I was disappointed in her. M started freaking out saying that she was sorry and she didn't want to lose me and I told her that I needed time to think. So I am asking you r/relationships, what do I do??
TL;DR: | SO was cutting due to depression. I somehow helped her stop. Last night, she told me that she cut again (due to depression once more). What do I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me (24f) with my employer (56f)- invited me to thanksgiving, I haven't come out to them yet, and don't know how to decline.
POST: So I've been working for this family for about 5 months. Nicest people in the universe. I work in their home about 40 hours a week with their special needs daughter. They are often home when I am there and I've formed a pretty good relationship with them. This is my favorite, and best paying job I've ever had.
So I am new to the area that we all live (TN) and I don't know many people. I do have a gf of two years and we plan to spend thanksgiving together because it's her birthday. Since i don't know many people, and because I'm new to the area and they are the sweetest people ever, they invited me to their thanksgiving dinner. When they first asked I kind of just froze and said maybe because I didn't know what else to say.
I need to know how to politely decline their invitation. I got asked for a second time yesterday by them and I still said I don't know yet. I feel really rude for doing this even though it will be a large crowd and it probably wouldn't be any more work or accommodating for me to come.
How do I decline without coming out, and without making up a huge lie?
TL;DR: | employer doesn't know I'm gay, invited me to thanksgiving with her family, I need a polite way to decline without coming out to them (not ready yet). |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: "It's none of your business"
POST: 19F here. I've been dating my boyfriend (20) for almost three years now. Lately if he tells me he has to go somewhere, I'll ask him where, he'll say "it's none of your business". Or just in general, he'll tell me he has to do something, and when I ask about it, he'll tell me it's none of my business. This bugs me a little, but am I wrong for being bothered? I don't understand why he'd tell me he has to do something and then tell me to mind my own business when I ask about it. Nothing too big, not much of a deal breaker, just wanted to know if I'm wrong or over-exaggerating for being bothered by it.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend tells me to mind my own business after he tells me he has to do something and I ask about it. Am I wrong for being bothered by this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by accidentally waterboarding myself
POST: As a Reddit creep for most of the time, I've come to frequent SkincareAddiction.
It's been a cornerstone in changing my skin for the better; specifically through oil cleansing.
Now, I massage mineral oil all over my face in the morning as a cleanser and hop into the shower with a fresh face cloth to do the rest of the cleaning!
This morning however, after a night where I had to take a sleeping tablet, I was a little more than groggy doing my morning routine.
I'm stood in the shower with the warm wrung out face cloth over my face, and I sway forward a bit.
I sway forward and my face gets put under the running shower head.
Cue panicked breathing and breathe swallowing of water. My arms go out to stop myself slipping whilst my brain tries to redirect them to taking he face cloth off..
I end up on my arse in the shower and completely out of the groggy headedness as I realise what I'd done.
TL;DR: | swayed forward in the shower having taken a sleeping tablet the night before and accidentally water boarded myself with a face cloth while oil cleansing. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [22 F] just go dumped by my boyfriend[23 M] a few weeks before we completed a year. Extremely upset.
POST: We were in an LDR for 11 months. Both of us went away on holiday separately with our families. He is still there but I came back a few weeks ago. That is when he began to ignore me and started to behave distant.
I asked him whats wrong, and all he said was I dont feel like talking. I figured he just needed space so I let him be.
A few days ago he said he can't see a future with me and he wasnt sure if he loved me. He wasnt able to see himself being in a serious relationship.
I am so devastated because I thought he wanted a life with me. Thats what we always talked about. And now he doesnt even want to commit to me.
The first person I have ever loved to pieces broke my heart and left. He pursued me and he told me he loved me first. Then how could he out of the blue tell me its over.
I dont know how to deal with this, I had nervous breakdown and I feel like im going into depression. I feel worthless.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend broke up because he couldnt see me in his future. I am devastated and unsure how to handle this. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by letting my 6 year old daughter go into a public bathroom at Dunkin Donuts, unsupervised..
POST: We go into Dunkin Donuts because she needs to use the restroom. I tell her to make sure she pushes in the little push lock on the handle even though I waited right outside the door. She goes in, does her thing, comes back out all super excited and says, "LOOK! I found money!!" I look, and she's got a dollar bill in her hand. I was like, "nice, good eyes"... then I look down at her again and realize it wasn't just a dollar bill that someone accidentally dropped. It was somebody's drug straw. My daughter's standing there trying to unroll it from straw form. All I could picture was a big poof of coke going right in her face as she finishes unrolling it. So I had to quickly snatch it out of her hands like some kind of money hungry asshole, before my 6 year old ended up with some unknown, powdered drug all over herself. She looked at me with this "what the fuck" face, full of shock and confusion. All I could say was that I'd give her a different dollar bill when we got home. She still probably just thinks im a greedy piece of shit.
TL;DR: | my kid found a dollar bill in a public bathroom that had been up someone's nose. I had to take it from her in case there were still any drug remnants on it, but she just thinks I stole her new found money. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [26 M] with my ex-girlfriend [25 F], we broke up in late December and were meant to reinstate contact within a few months. Not sure how to phrase the text
POST: We were together a couple of years, and she was my best friend. Due to complications of her not taking care of her depression/anxiety issues, we split up. We had a pet together, which I took ownership of after the split. At one point we lived together but that didn't work out either.
The breakup was definitely not mutual - I initiated it, and I think it felt very sudden/unexpected for her. It was a shit time for both of us, but we decided to go no-contact for a "few months" to let things settle. I still have a bunch of her stuff, and she has some of mine. I still need to get her to sign over the cat's microchip to my name.
It's been about five months now and I'm having a hard time putting together a text message to initiate the conversation. I imagine that I'm meant to be the one contacting her, as I initiated the breakup? Our idea was that we would at least remain friends.
TL;DR: | broke up with my depressed girlfriend in late December. I don't know how to reinitiate contact, so we can exchange stuff and perhaps strike up a friendship. Can someone give me a good simple text I can send her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [25F] am in a transitional period in life and I don't feel like the transition is going well with my fiance [27M].
POST: So here's a very brief overview....
I met my SO right when my career began taking off about two years ago. Both things happening were AWESOME developments in my life. Although, a busy 60+ hours/week career isn't great for a person physically or mentally, and I let myself go a bit.
Lately I have been a stressed out nervous wreck and I just crossed into the "overweight" category. I'm sick of it. I started making immediate changes - doing things I enjoyed when I was single like painting and teaching piano, I've started working out an hour a day, and I'm working my ass off to improve in any way that I can, because I enjoy bettering myself.
Then comes my SO. I work 50+ hr weeks still, he works part time. When I come home, I have time to work out, eat dinner, and go to sleep. I can't get him to do anything, and we bicker constantly. His attitude SUCKS lately, he creates ridiculous messes around the house, doesn't do any chores, and I don't know how to talk to him.
We actually discussed it the other night when he spent more money than we could afford getting absolutely shit face drunk and he finally opened up to me, saying he was so happy I was doing things for myself again, promised he would get better with helping out around the house, etc. but now he doesn't remember that conversation AT ALL.
**Here is my question: Is this normal? Do all couples who live together/marry go through this? What do I do when I can't stand him? I'm trying so hard to be nice.
TL;DR: | I am making very positive lifestyle changes and I have almost no free time to myself. SO won't help around the house and has a shitty attitude that pulls me down. What do I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit, please help my girlfriend and I.
POST: I'm usually not a beggar for help but this is a very serious issue. My girlfriend lives and is a citizen of Canada. She wants to obtain a Visa to live and work in the United States permanently so she could be closer to me. She has told me there is nothing left for her in Canada and will think about fully making the move. The only problem is, we can't seem to get a Visa for her since she isn't opening a business or a millionaire. What can we do, without resorting to marriage, to have her live here? Maybe if she went back to school? I'm not fairly educated on this topic so any advice would be appreciated.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend lives in Canada. She wants to become a permanent resident of the United States and work here. Need advice on how to get a Visa. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [27M] with my coworker and friend [18F] of 3 months, we've gotten really close but never see each other outside work.
POST: I hope this is the right place for this, can't really figure out where else to ask this.
I've got a question and I was hoping you gentlefolk might be able to answer it for me. A few months back I made friends with a girl who I met at work. We immediately hit it off and have been texting some what regularly, sometimes in to the late hours of the night, talking about all manner of nonsense. We have lots shared interests and the stuff we don't we can easily make fun of and tease each other for in good fun. It seems out friendship has quickly become very strong over our text message conversations yet it never seems to progress to anything beyond that.
We also work together at a retail store. From what I heard, she enjoys working with me the most out of all our coworkers and we'll sometimes hang out in the parking lot after work, but this is few and far between as we work at most once every 2 weeks together. This is about all the interaction we have in person. I've invited them out several times, both as a 1 on 1 hang outs and a group thing, but she seems to always be busy or always has other plans. Usually I take this as a sign that she may not be interested and back off but our conversations haven't let up and she seems genuinely sorry that she can't make it, going so far as offering to bake me cinnamon rolls from scratch (after I of course mention that cinnamon rolls are my favorite ever). I'm not sure what to think at this point. Should I even try asking her to hang out again when I almost always know the answer? Can a friendship survive through text messaging alone? Are we really not that close and am I misreading things?
TL;DR: | Formed what I think is a really strong friendship, but we never hang out outside work. Am I just reading in to this wrong? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I am a 26 yr old male needing advice.
POST: I am a 26 yr old male and I bought my parents house. I have a Good Job. I broke up with my gf of a couple years and she had a daughter that I was the only father she has ever known. Well fast fwd a few months. I am still getting over not so much the gf but the whole being dad scenario. Well my parents are retired and live down south for the most part. However they enjoy coming to visit (which I don't mind) but around spring break they over stay their welcome in my opinion. They have been here 5 days now and my mother is driving me crazy. I wake up in the middle of the night to my mother fucking cleaning. Dusting this or rearranging that. Well my brother is overseas and his wife and son are in my home state visiting her parents and are planning to come visit my parents in my home now. I don't want to seem like a bad person. I love my nephew and family very much but Damn I just really want to be alone right now and feel over powering urge to run away and go on vacation. I just really don't want to be around children at the moment Am I a bad person for not wanting my family to come visit and stay in my home?
Why do old people have to run the fucking heat all the God Damn time? Also If I have a 4 bedroom house and no one has slept in the other 3 beds since I washed the sheets is it really necessary to wash the fucking sheets again?
Sorry Reddit just at wits end here.
TL;DR: | I am tired of my mom being in supermom clean patrol mode cleaning my house which isn't dirty in prep of my brother's family coming to visit all without my consent and don't know what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: And here comes another cliche question..
POST: So, me 22/F and him 22/M, seeing each other 4 months.
I see him eh, fairly often, however we've only been out formally maybe three times. Coffee the 1st time, movie the 2nd, and breakfast the 3rd.
Each and every single time i've offered to pay and he declined. For the movie date, he got there before me and got our tickets before I could even try. Breakfast I offered, and he said jokingly: "I can't believe you just asked me that". So, clearly he is the type that prefers/wants/feels he needs to pay. He also has a well paying job, so it shouldn't be a strain on him, im just the type of girl who doesn't take advantage and doesn't want to give him the wrong idea.
He asked me to dinner tomorrow, should I even bother offering at this point? Or just let him take charge. Sure, clearly I understand he's made it a point THAT HE PAYS, but I don't want to not offer this one time, then have him thinking im trying to take him for his money lol. Yes, I over-analyze.
TL;DR: | I always offer to pay, he declines. We're going to our first dinner tomorrow night-- should I even bother offering anymore? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by accidentally flipping the bird.
POST: So unlike most TIFU'S this one actually happened today.
Long story short I was in class today when I was staring at my friend across the room and I flexed my middle finger towards my chin not intentionally give him the bird but it's visible.
Turns out there was someone else looking in my direct line of sight and I had absolutely no idea she was looking for at least five seconds. By the time I saw her I assumed that she thought I was giving her the bird; She even turned around to see if I was giving it somebody else. At first I kind of denied intentionally giving the bird in general claiming I was just tensing up.
After class ended I let her know saying that I apologized saying it wasn't meant for, then said that I had no idea that she was looking to begin with and that I hope I didn't offend her in any manner. She accepted the apology and we went on with our day.
TL;DR: | Gave the bird to classmate, ended up in the line of sight of another classmate, denied even making the sign, apologized; Fin. |
SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: [HELP] Side effects of rapid weight loss/poor nutrition. Also, is this Skinny-Fat?
POST: Hi loseit,
First some stats, I'm 5' 9'', 155lbs at the moment. I started at 187, and involuntarily went to 171 after I moved on my own, then I took control and am now at 155.
2 weeks ago I posted this: [Really discouraged after losing 25lbs and discovering that it's probably because of my thyroid.] So I went to the doctor, and from the tests looks like it's not a thyroid problem after all (haven't seen the doctor yet, but my appointment is in 2 weeks)
I was thinking the hair loss and constipation might be related to vitamin deficiencies, are these common side effects? I searched and found only a couple of posts on each, so it doesn't look too common. If they are, I think we should add them to the FAQ or something.
I bought a multivitamin to try and help, is it going to make me gain weight?
Kind of related, I currently have what I think is a skinny-fat look ([PICs - sorry, shitty camera] and I don't know if I should keep the calorie deficit or start with maintenance mode.
TL;DR: | Is hair loss and constipation a common problem when dieting? Can multivitamin supplements help? Or are they going to interfere with my diet? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [24 F] with my boyfriend [26M] 5 years, dinner dilemma
POST: Boyfriend and I have been arguing recently about dinner.
I get up early, work out, go to work, come home early, clean up from the previous night, and prep/make dinner. I try to snack throughout the day and eat a late lunch, but I am usually starving for dinner by 6:30-7. (This probably has to do with my previous 18+ years of eating dinner back home with my parents at 5 pm.)
My boyfriend, on the other hand, doesn't even get home until 7:30-8pm, and wants to work out, shower and sometimes play video games until 8:30-9, and THEN he is ready for dinner.
Lately, I have been encouraging him to get up early and work out early so that we can eat dinner earlier (Like 8 pm, latest), but he says that I should just plan my snacks/lunch to his schedule and make dinner later.
My issue is this: I am the one making dinner, and I am the one cleaning up the morning after. I really am trying to compromise here but eating at 8:30-9pm is just ridiculous to me, especially when I go to bed like an hour later.
Should I compromise more? Is my boyfriend in the wrong?
TL;DR: | I want to eat at 7-8pm. Boyfriend says I should compromise and eat at more like 9pm, even though I am the one making dinner and I am the one cleaning up. What do we do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Ironic, but how do I stop being needy?
POST: My boyfriend (19M) recently told me (18F) that he thinks that I'm "getting TOO needy" ( his words and emphasis, not mine). A little background: He and I rarely see each other, and our only form of communicaion is through texting. We've been together eight months now, and we haven't been having this issue. I give him space whenever he needs it, and he knows I won't get mad if he asks for it. He always wants to talk, so I know I'm not the one being too clingy in that aspect. Overall, I don't see how I'm being needy.
Does it make me needy that I respond when he wants to talk? I feel like I'm missing something here. Feel free to ask me any questions.
TL;DR: | I know this is ironic to ask, but I need to know so that I can fix it, but what is needy, and how do I stop coming across as it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me 26M with my ex-gf 25F 1.5yr, seeing each other for the first time after the breakup (6 weeks)
POST: Hi,
She broke up with me, however I was unhappy pretty much the whole way through the relationship as she was a habitual belligerent, abusive, and hurtful binge drinker (used to happen weekly, then became a monthly occurence). It was absolutely like dating two completely different people. She wouldn't cheat on my, but she'd act like a maniac in all sorts of ways. Embarrasing
I never fully 'committed' to her. There was always doubt, and I held back. I refused to celebrate anniversaries, I told her I wasn't ready to move in with her or marry her when she asked...
I thought I was on the mend- met a few great girls when out, got phone numbers. However- none have replied to me (furthering my feelings of rejection).
Seems clear-cut, but it's never that simple. I still have strong feelings for her. She's 'too hot' for me (i'm short, with no money, she's a tall, stunning once model).
I know all that superficial/on paper stuff doesn't matter, because the reality is she was I knew how wrong she was a long time ago... I'm concerned I'll end up trying to get back with her when I see her in person tomorrow (she's coming for a visit).
TL;DR: | Was I too harsh to my GF for binge drinking? Reassurance needed that I shouldn't stay with this girl! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My (29/f) boyfriend (34/m) of 2 years is constantly being "catfished" and his nativity is turning me off.
POST: Hi reddit,
This one is kind of weird.
My boyfriend and I don't have a normal relationship. It's semi-open, but ONLY to find people to introduce to our sex life together (threesomes, foursomes, that sort of thing.)
He is big into social media and making friends on the internet, which is something I don't have a problem with until it affects "real life." (If we are spending time together and he spends more time on his phone than talking to me, it becomes an issue.)
With that, the people he talks to are mainly semi-attractive women. However, every time a really attractive woman talks to him (he finds them on twitter or tumblr) they are ALWAYS fake people using other people's pictures.
He constantly gives these fake people the benefit of the doubt. I'll tell him that they're probably fake, and he'll say "well who knows." You know who knows? I do, because I reverse image search their pictures and they are on multiple sites. The more recent one is one he started talking to on his porn tumblr. He wanted me to start talking to her so we could "start something" (I guess sexting, or something) and it is a faker using a picture of a 16 year old girl.
This naivety is such a turn off. I don't know what to do really. I've told him that he is too trusting on the internet but it doesn't really phase him.
I obviously can't change him, so I think my only option is to let the distasteful feelings toward him either pass or turn into resentment. If he wants "friends" on the internet, what harm does that do to me? I'm starting to think I'm just being a bitch, or maybe deep down I'm questioning his motives for seeking out these women.
What should I do? Should I just find a way to get over it? I know how petty this all is, and I'm ashamed that I even feel this way.
Thanks
TL;DR: | My boyfriend makes friends online and they all turn out to be fake. His naivety is a turn off. Is this something I should just get over? How do I get over it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18 M] haven't seen my ex-girlfriend [18F] in a long time, and she is going to be at my best friends party, what should I do?
POST: So I went out with my ex last year for 6 months, had great times and stuff, but we broke it up because it suddenly stopped working. About a week after the breakup I decided "no contact" would be my best bet for getting over her, so I explained to her what I was doing, and blocked her on all forms of social media and such. I've seen her only once since the breakup, and that was when I was working and it gave me an anxiety attack. I haven't contacted her in the last 7 months or so, except this one time she texted me, but it was of no significance.
Anyway so, My best buddie's 18th is coming up in a months time, and she is most likely going to be there as they go to school together. I'm super worried and stressing out that I will freak out, choke up or something when I see her, or that she will ruin my night. I'm not gonna say I'm fully over her, there are definitely dormant feelings that things like this stir up inside me. I've been stressing thinking about it heaps lately. I'd be pretty sad to see her with another guy and stuff.
Do you guys have any tips for me? Should I just tough it out? How can I mentally prepare myself? Should I unblock her on Facebook to talk to her and see what vibes I get from her about how I should act and stuff?
Thanks very much in advance!
TL;DR: | Ex-gf who I haven't seen in months will be at my best friends 18th birthday party, I'm worried I'll freak out when I see her. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by accidentally piercing my wang
POST: This happened no less than 5 minutes ago.
I just got home from a long day at work, came home, and began stripping down to take a nice hot shower. Thats when I noticed it. The little black dot on my donger. Now I don't normally have acne anywhere close to my downstairs light post, except for the occasional butt pimple, so I was rather intrigued to see what the occurrence was. I immediately begin inspecting my womb raider's new marking only to find that I had succumbed to a small black head. Ive had black heads before so I know what the procedure is on removing them, and I begin applying pressure around the small black dot to relieve it of its contents. This is where it gets interesting. After applying slight pressure to the black head, it doesnt come out of one spot, but two! I remove the black grime from the top of my tummy banana and begin inspecting what appears to be a worm hole from one side of the skin to another. Being the manly man I am, I go into my kitchen and grab a tooth pick, and in a fit of rage I poke it in the hole and it glides with ease through my lance of love, leaving me with what I can only call an accidental piercing.
TL;DR: | Came home from work, went to shower, found black head on top of my knob, stuck tooth pick through hole from said black head. Pierced my pee-pee |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22 M] with my GF [21 F] 3 years, Do I attempt to talk to her, and try to show her i'm worth keeping?
POST: Me and my gf dated for over 3 years, in those 3 years she's grown up a lot. I haven't. On top of never getting a job, and living with my parents, i was an immense asshole. It's been the most painful week of my life so far, and i've only talked to her once. The one time we talked she said, "i need time to figure myself out". I'm assuming she has realized im not worth shit and doesn't want to waste any more time with me.
It's been about 3 days since that really fucked up realization that I was a terrible person. I don't want it to end after 3 years, i still love her and she did say she still loved me. I just need to get a job to get my life rolling.
Is there any getting back with her? or am i just moving onto the bargaining stage?
Should I send a text to her brother, sister, or cousin to see what her feelings are? or should i just keep the no contact going?
I think about her every night before i go to sleep, and basically cry myself to sleep. I dream about her when i finally do sleep, and when i wake up i cry because it's not real. I'm so fucked up.
TL;DR: | dated 3 years, im worthless shes moving on. Is there a possibility that i can get her back if i get my shit together? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [23F] coworker [50ishM] keeps arguing with/correcting/double checking me on everything and it's driving me crazy! What can I do?
POST: I started a job about 4 months ago as the assistant to the director of a government division. I've mastered all of my duties pretty quickly and feel fairly confident in my understanding of policies and procedures as well as where I have the authority to provide guidance on matters to our division staff.
A new coworker, who is ranked above me but is not my supervisor, has not been respecting me on anything since he arrived last month. He'll ask me a question on how to handle a time and attendance matter, for example (I'm the division's timekeeper). I'll tell him what he should do. Then he'll proceed to question me about it, imply I could be wrong or making assumptions, and go ask the director or deputy director if what I said was correct. Sometimes, in a group (like at trainings with other divisions' staff) or conversation, I'll bring something up and he'll try to "correct" me in front of others, even though he doesn't actually know as much about whatever it is/hasn't been here as long.
This has happened several times since he's started and it's getting old really quickly. My job is to relay and enforce policies or make decisions that are under my purview, and it's really interfering with my ability to do that. What should I do? Discuss with my supervisor (who outranks the coworker in question)?
I'm honestly worried my supervisor and the director will support this behavior and basically take away the little authority I have around here (it's been hard to gain it in the first place because I'm youngest person here!) which will make my job even more miserable than it already is... Help!
TL;DR: | Coworker is always questioning me/appealing to higher ups on things that should be my decision. It's frustrating and makes my job harder than it should be. What should I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by taking Midol with ITP
POST: I have ITP, which is when your immune system kills off your platlets, which are the helpful little cells that stop bleeding. I have some platelets, just not that many. It's one of three autoimmune issues, another one is an IBD. Both are relevant.
I also have ADD and NLD for which I take concerta. Thanks to an issue with my scripts, I have to skip doses. This made me feel like crap, so I took Midol for the caffeine. I'm not usually that retarded, but today I was.
I'm not supposed to have it because it can exacerbate bleeding. I didn't think much of it, but I should've. Now, thanks to the IBD and the ITP, I've got GI bleeding. I'm running to the bathroom a few times an hour to crap blood. I'm going to have no energy for several days now, and I completely deserve it.
TL;DR: | I gave myself rectal bleeding by taking a no-no OTC drug. This will make me more anemic which will suck up any remaining energy. I'm retarded. |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: Long stay in hospital--credit card problems
POST: Hi Reddit,
I am an elderly man whose son is a lurker (He is typing for me). He suggested I come here for credit card help. I was in the hospital from December to March, and have been in a slow, hazy recovery since then. I am now well enough to catch up on everything I missed.
Anyway, I had been rebuilding my credit prior to my hospital stay, and was timely on my credit card payments. I landed in the hospital unexpectedly, and had not told my family about my outstanding accounts. My wife and child were incredible, and stayed by my side the entire time. The downside to this is that my mail accumulated and no one ever saw the statements coming in.
Many thought I would not make it, but here I am. I plan on sticking around for quite a bit. But...I now currently have a number of credit card bills that have racked up interest for 5 months due to my stay and recovery. Is there anything I can do to fix this? I would like to get back to fixing my credit.
TL;DR: | I was in the hospital for 3 months, and in recovery for 2 months. My credit card balances racked up and my credit has likely dipped. How do I fix this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [23F] with my SO[27M] Living together. Strippers, Drugs & Alchol. A man's weekend.
POST: My SO's Brother is having a Bachelor's party. It will be a 3 day house boat party with strippers, drugs and alcohol.
I know that bachelor parties are a part of life and that I shouldn't have an issue with him going. I have no intention of trying to get him to not go, I just want to know what other ladies do to help deal with it/not think about it?
I feel so uneasy about the strippers, the influence of his older brothers and the drugs.
As background: I trust him not to do anything he thinks is wrong, but i'm worried what he thinks is wrong will be different to what I think is wrong.
I have told him the thought of strippers make me uncomfortable. He mentioned that he is mildly grossed out by strippers because of how many men they have been around but I know that won't stop him from having his hands on them when his older brothers are encouraging him.
Our conversations don't seem to get anywhere because I don't want to come off as a psycho, insecure and jealous girlfriend.
Would love your thoughts or even the male perspective. I want him to be happy. How can I stop letting this bother me?
TL;DR: | what do other ladies do to help deal with it/not think about it, when their partners go to the strippers/bachelor parties? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21 M] with my [19 F] 8 months, I'm not sure if i want to end the relationship or not. My gut is telling me to end it
POST: When I started dating this girl i knew it wouldn't be forever, and I think now is a good time to end it. The semester just ended and its the beginning of summer. I know I should end it now, but there's something preventing me from going through with it. I don't know if it's because i just don't want to be alone, or if this girl is really someone i should keep around. I feel good when I'm with her, but when we're apart all i can think about is breaking up with her. I don't understand.
We get along really well, and she's really sweet. If someone asked me why I wanted to break up with her i don't know if i can think of a good reason other than it just doesn't feel right.
TL;DR: | I'm not sure if i should dump her or not. My gut tells me yes, but when I'm with her I can't do it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I [18M] am getting extremely mixed signals from my crush [18F].
POST: We have been friends for 6 months now, and I've liked her from the start. We only met in person once, but I will see her this week once we both move into our dorms. In the meantime, we have video chatted, snapchatted, and texted. Here are the positive signals I've received from her: she often talks about our future together and how amazing it will be, she asked me to raise her new dog with her, she says that she thinks we will get much closer very soon, she asked if she could take me out to dinner (her treat), she always talks about how she wants to see me, and she's offered me a room in her home. However, on the other hand: when I mentioned dating her once she ignored it, it sometimes feels like she's avoiding me, and she has said that she has several potential romantic interests she wants to explore. I had said the same thing, though, so I don't know if that counts for much. She also has been cancelling our video chats a lot recently, but her texts have stayed flirtatious. In addition to all of this, in our most recent video chat, she told me all about her ex and cried because she really thought they had something. Does her telling me this mean something? I really want to ask her to be my girlfriend, but I'm not sure if she's being friendly or if she likes me back.
TL;DR: | My college friend talks about our future and wants me to raise a dog with her, but she also has been bailing on me and mentioning other people. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me[25M] and my fiancée [22F] after 4 years broke up a week ago. Out of the blue i was asked around to her house to be told she no longer loves me. i don't know what to do next. Shall i accept this and move on?
POST: My fiancée has recently joined a new group of single friends at her work and they often go out clubbing and drinking together. Everything was fine with that up until last week when I was called around to her house to be told that she no longer loves me and she will be happier without me.
Her reason for no longer loving me is that she no longer wants the same things i do in the relationship. About 2 years into it purposed to her and she was so excited because this meant we could finally move out and start a family which we both dreamed about from the first year together. We were both very happy together. We told each other almost daily how much we meant to each other and often spoke of our future and children. But now just as our dream of moving out is becoming achievable she says she no longer wants any of this and wants to be single with her new friends.
In the breakup/split she has asked to keep all our photos we had together in a album because she didn't want to forget me. This doesn't sound like the thing someone who didn't love me would do. The advice I have been given from my friends/family is to accept this and move on. but her family says i shouldn't give up and she will soon realize her mistake. Holding on to hope at the moment is really killing me. I am loosing sleep and getting quiet down about things when i think about my life without her.
Shall i move on or wait?
(Apologies if spelling or grammar is missing)
TL;DR: | Fiancee of 4 years doesn't love me anymore. because she thinks being single will make her happier. what shall i do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: (SA) What is the average low-risk interest rate in New York?
POST: Hi, I'm writing an article that only briefly touches on banking in the US (particularly NY), and I'm not sure if the same systems, terminology and conventions apply there as they do in South Africa.
My basic question is: what would the average interest rate be on a small amount of cash that the user has put into savings, for example. My article proposes a man putting small amounts of money away (between $5 and $12 a day) and earning interest on them over the period of 15 years.
Some articles I've read suggest a 10% interest rate in Stocks, but that sounds a little hard to believe. And even if it's true, practically, my hypothetical man wouldn't jump straight into Stocks investment with his first $12.
Capital Bank's site suggests an interest rate of 0.05%, but that seems a bit low to my inexperienced eye. I thought at first that this was because it listed it under a Money Trader account (which I assume means that you can take out that money whenever you want it), but it goes on to set the same 0.05% for Personal Savings (which I would assume means that you CAN'T just take out that money whenever you want it). I must be wrong somewhere here...?
TL;DR: | What is the average (monthly/annual) interest-rate given to growing (by $12 every day) cash investments in a fixed deposit savings account? |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: Do I message the person I like, wait to see them in person soon or give up and move on?
POST: At the start of the month I [18M] went to a party with a girl [19] I like from university, we've only briefly chatted before this, but spent most of the time chatting to each other and getting very drunk just the two of us despite the party. From what I remember afterwards she dragged me back to my room, we made sure we were both okay (relatively speaking) and then went our seperate ways. A few days (4/5) later as I was travelling home for christmas I messaged her about the night - working out what went on etc. as I couldn't remember a couple details and we had a great long funny conversation which quickly moved on from the nights events to other things.
I left it a few more days and messaged her "Hey! How are you?" and didn't get a response, at all but she didn't see the message until a couple days after it was sent.
So my issue boils down to this, do I message her again asking how her christmas was as a way to develop the friendship to the point where I can just ask her out, wait until i go back to uni in around 10 days where I will bump into her and see her anyway (We live in the same accomodation) or is she simply not interested and I should give up and move on?
Any help would be appreciated I am genuinely useless at this whole thing, the last couplr girls i've been into i've either sunk too much time into them when they are uninterested or not made the move when i should have and left it too late.
TL;DR: | Had a few good conversations with a girl but didnt get a reply, do I message her again, wait till I see her in person soon or give up? |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: PSA: Doing things half way will fuck your life up
POST: So I've always been the guy that likes to make things happen, try new things, and experiment, however, I have a tendency to only do things half way.
For example, I wanted to move across the country for school. My whole family grew up in California so I wanted to go to Boston University. I didn't try hard enough in school to go there so I compromised, going to a school in Arizona. At least it's out of state right?! Yes, but it blows.
Now, onto my reason for writing this, this semester I wanted to join a fraternity. I'll be a junior next semester so I thought it'd be fun to try something new. Well, a lot of places liked me, and I got told to come back the next day for one of the top houses on campus. However, my friends did not get a call back, so they continued to rush a more middle of the road fraternity.
I've never been that into frats so I decided just to rush the middle one with them, how much different could it be? A lot different. Apparently the frat I'm in now is being investigated for rape, therefore, no girls. To the hot girls, this place is a joke. I want to drop, but I can't rush again as a junior, I'll be one year from graduating. Also, I don't want to abandon my friends but god it sucks knowing that I could have been part of something that was what I really wanted but settled for this.
TL;DR: | Doing things half way has landed me at a mediocre school, in a mediocre fraternity and it's pissing me off. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [35/m] My ex-wife is fucking random guys and getting into riskier games, should I be concerned for the safety of my young children?
POST: In January I separated from my wife after 10 years of marriage, we've got 6 year old twins and they now live half the time with her, half with me.
She's recently got into hooking up with guys via app based social networks (Blendr I think), she's not interested in a relationship but just wants to have fun and sex. Usually she'll have the guys come over to her place when I've got the kids. When she first started doing this, a month ago, she confided to me that she was concerned about her safety, I suggested she consider using a different location than her home because it also exposes the kids to any risk, but she went ahead and met guys at her home anyway.
Last night she told me she currently has 4 guys on the go, one came over the night before and she had sex with him whilst another was hiding in the garden watching through the window. Just to be clear the kids are with me whilst this is all happening (as far as I'm aware).
Now for me it's a bit challenging to hear all this because of my history with her: it's still relatively recently that we separated, we rarely had sex and she never orgasmed. So it's clear she's now exploring her sexuality and enjoying her freedom, which she has every right to.
When she tells me about this stuff I just get floored by it, full of my own feelings. She's telling me all this and kind of asking "is this OK?".
So should I be concerned about her and the kids safety? What advice can I give her?
I'm thinking the biggest risk is that one of these guys turns up uninvited and won't leave. Luckily she lives on a street with a lot of good people she could call on for help.
One idea I've had is to send her [this article] which talks about responding to threats of violence.
TL;DR: | Ex is regularly fucking random guys in my kids home and starting to get more adventurous, should I be concerned for the safety of the kids & what advice can I give her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Am I [21M] being an idiot for trying not to talk to her [20F] anymore?
POST: Idk if this is the right subreddit to ask but I'll give it a try anyways.
Basically we met on an online game through a mutual IRL friend. We started talking through whatsapp and skype mostly for around 2 months and we got along SO WELL. We would talk/chat all day long everyday, we would stay up until 5-6am chatting and had lots of common interests. I liked this girl and I thought something could happen with her, and she thought the same way.
Now fast forwarding a bit... We met in person for the first time last week, we went to the movies and it didn't go very good. We rushed to the movie because it was late, couldnt really talk or do anything inside and once it finished we left. We talked about random stuff on our way to the bus stops for 5 minutes and then we went on our own ways. After that we texted a bit once we both got home and she told me she didn't feel anything, there was no feeling.
Im not angry at this girl or anything but I dont really feel like talking to her anymore now that I know nothing will happen. My friend tells me Im being dumb and that atleast I should keep playing this online game with her because we both enjoyed playing together.
We also haven't spoke at all since saturday
TL;DR: | been talking to a girl through whatsapp for 2 months, we got along really well but once we met in person she said there was no chemistry, now im cutting off contact with her |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: Saving money from mom as a minor?
POST: Asking for a friend who is 17 who doesn't use reddit-
She has about 60k USD in a bank account that a relative gave to her shortly before he died. No one in her family knows about the money but she is afraid that they will find out, especially her mom, who is spectacularly bad with money (spending lots of money of frivolous things, money disappearing, stealing money from kids' bank accounts etc.). The account is not linked to her mom in any way as far as she knows, but is under her name instead (used to be under her dead relative's name? I'm a bit confused as to how that worked out). The problem is, she will be applying to college in the US next year and she is afraid that colleges will force her to use all of that money right away to pay for school.
She would like to save it until after school is over, but doesn't know how to hide it from her mom while also hiding it from schools? She has considered taking it out in cash over time and hiding it but that seems like a bad idea overall? I suggested to her to use a safety deposit box but it seems like there are rules and regulations for those under 18 in many places?
Before she tries anything I thought it would be a good idea to ask here.
I'd be happy to answer any questions as best I can for now. I'll ask her if I don't know anything.
TL;DR: | Friend has a lot of money in an account from her relative, doesn't know how to hide it from irresponsible mom or from colleges. Any advice? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU By Trusting Adidas
POST: So recently the adidas yeezy boosts releases like last week (22/08/15)
I woke up really early to try and get a pair from the adidas website. Currently at this point I was kinda poor and my new job was going to pay me until 2 weeks.
So I was somehow LUCKY enough to get a pair! I instantly then paid via my debit card and checked my emails/bank balance and saw the money had gone through.
this was on saturday.
Anyway now its wednesday and I have like £60 in my bank account to last me for the trains for the rest of the week for my work, until I get paid. Everything is normal I goto the checkout to buy a train ticket... but my card is declined???
I frantacially call my bank to see wtf is going on because as far as I was aware I had like £60 yesterday.
The bank then tell me I actually have MINUS - £90!
Apparently adidas randomly tried to charge me again for my yeezys and fucked up.
I call my work to tell them I cant come again. I get a call later saying I have been sacked as I have been late before.
TL;DR: | So basically adidas tried to charge me twice for a pair of yeezys's put me into overdraft, and my work sacked me |
SUBREDDIT: r/running
TITLE: Can't seem to shake groin injury
POST: I've been struggling with this groin problem for months now. It started when I overdid it by jumping from my normal 3 mile runs straight to 5 mile runs.
I ran 5 miles on March 18th and then again on March 20th and had knee and groin pains on the right side ever since then.
I've tried not running for over a month and it doesn't seem to have made a difference. I've been to two different orthopedic doctors and they haven't found anything wrong with me. I've been given cortisone shots to the knee and taken anti-inflammatory pills.
A friend recently recommended using a foam roller on my IT band and and that does seem to have helped quite a bit. I'm now able to run about 1.5 miles if I do a really good warmup including using the foam roller and extensive stretching.
My knee seems to be OK now. I've been running with a patella strap on that side, but I'm still worried about my groin.
The pain seems to go from inside my groin/pelvic area and go around the outside of my hip down to my knee. I've been icing after runs and then wrapping my knee.
I'm concerned to still be feeling this injury a bit and because I'm still limited in how far and often I can run. Does anyone have any suggestions or input on this? I'm willing to try just about anything to get back to peak running shape.
Thanks!
TL;DR: | Overdid it back in March by running too far, too soon & have struggled with knee and groin injuries since. Looking for tips to get back to peak running shape. |
SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: Newbie help, feeling down about no progress.
POST: I'm really sorry if I shouldn't be posting this, I read the FAQ's and read a few inspiring stories I found through the search bar but I was just wondering If I could get some help on starting out. I really suck at this and its starting to really get me down.
I'm Female, 20, 5'5" and weigh 185lbs. I'm wanting to lose any weight, just something to prove to myself I can do this. Of course I'd love to weigh 126lbs but I don't think that's a real goal. I think I just need to lose some weight and begin feeling/seeing a difference to make me realise this is possible and I'm not gonna feel like this forever. I don't wanna put a date on anything, there's no rush and I'd rather do this properly no matter how long it takes.
So a little about me and my diet / exercise.
- I find it hard to run because I'm short of breath and it really hurts my bust even with a sports bra (36 E bust). I kinda feel like a tool when running too because I'm just so crap at it.
- I've got an exercise bike and bicycle but I find I get bored and end up resenting both of them. I also kinda kick the hell out of both and end up cycling for x amount of calories burnt.
- I'm terrified of the gym because I'm covered in stretch marks all over and I'm just shy. Stupid I know.
- My diet consists of drinking only water and consuming 1,400 calories at max a day. I think I'm doing something wrong.
**So what's the best way to start?**
Would walking everyday really make a difference?
Should I be drinking something else other than water?
Any tips for not getting bored with exercise or to help running?
Any exercises that are actually better to be doing when starting out?
I don't know, just anything at all would be such a huge help.
TL;DR: | Overweight female wants to lose weight. Whats the best exercises I should be doing to not lose motivation and see results? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I just had a really pathetic dream about reddit karma. So reddit, what's your most reddit-related dream?
POST: I had a dream where in it I was looking at my own user page. I was shocked by the amount of karma I had for a comment that looked something vaguely along the lines of "I had a gono dono larafafa". The numbers in a dream don't stay constant so each time I looked back it's a different number (eg. 200, 1613, negative). I don't even know how I convinced myself that it was possible. It was a really derpy comment and I was obviously very unhappy about how such a retarded comment got so many upvotes. The worst part is I was going to make a post about that in my dream. I feel pathetic when I woke up.
The backstory on how I think I got this dream at night: during the day I was happy I had 16 upvotes on a comment I did in r/photoshopbattles. I haven't had a good comment in a while (as I'm not committed enough to only posting "Oh, Reddit" all the time.)! I failed as a novelty account holder.
TL;DR: | Stupid dream I had about reddit karma (yup, imaginary internet points) and a backstory about why I think I got it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [30:M] Girl I was talking to [26:f] MIA.
POST: Quit talking to me- dying to ask why.
I had been seeing this girl for a few weeks. We talked 3-4 times a day, I frankly got the vibe that she was more into me than I was into her. Last Friday (Jun 6) she came over, spent the night, we had sex, ate lunch saturday PM before I dropped her off at work. She then blew me off Sat/Sun. I asked her what was up with her- that she seemed off and she replied she's been super busy, in the middle of a move, etc. I let it go, and she's straight up ignored me since then. She's been socializing/boat trips/parties since last week. A text offering to hang out went unreplied.
I REALLY want to know what happened- was it something I did? Is there another guy? Frankly I don't give a shit, I have no interest in a relationship with her at this point, but I am so damn curious... She seemed like a genuinely good person with a lot of integrity who was crazy about me- not the sort of person to just slow fade me without explanation. How she handled it is frankly hurtful and disappointing.
Should I call her and ask wtf happened? I've sent 2 unreplied texts, last one being friday.
TL;DR: | Girl I had been dating for a few weeks randomly quit talking to me. Should I call her and find out exactly what happened, or wait until I see her in person? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [29/F] got played by a married [35/M] and I'm feeling really low about it...
POST: A month ago I met someone, and we hit it off. We had a great time hanging out at a party that night, and he wound up coming home with me. Good times were had and off he went. We exchanged a few texts over the next few days, and it became apparent that he was a bit flaky - so I dropped it.
A few weeks later, he messages me and we hook up again with expectations to meet for dinner later that week. He cancels and flakes. I offer an idea to get together a few days later, and get shut down. Whatever, I move on.
Fast forward another week. I run into him at a party, and he makes a comment about how he's trying to ignore me and runs off. I'm taken aback and confused, but don't follow. He eventually comes back and explains that he's married (which he swears he told me, but certainly didn't - he would have gone straight to the auto-reject list) and that I was just an 'experiment'.
I've never been 'the other girl' and would never willingly put myself in that place. I'm feeling really down about this. I kinda liked the guy, and can get over that... but I was played into a situation that I'm highly uncomfortable with. I won't put him on blast, since I'm not about causing drama and rifts among mutual friends... but I'm having a hard time resolving my feelings about the whole situation. I feel like a total fool and a sucker, but I know I didn't do anything wrong.
TL;DR: | Had a ton of fun hooking up with someone, to find out that they're married and that I was an 'experiment' in a really hurtful way. Feeling dirty and down. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [30 M] with my fiance [27 F] 2 years, considering an open relationship, question about logistics
POST: This is **not** a question about whether or not we should. We're still discussing it.
This is a question about the time and money costs of dating as a man in an open relationship.
When I was single, it was a lot of work and a lot of money. I spent hours and hours on dating sites looking at profiles. Then there were the nights out meeting people, weekends playing kickball, etc. I took a dozen women out on dates over a couple of years and ending up spending hundreds of dollars on food and activities.
As a man in an open relationship will it take more time or less time to find dates? Will it take more money or less money?
TL;DR: | As a man in an open relationship will it take more time or less time to find dates? Will it take more money or less money? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [26/F] am terrible at breakups. I cannot move on. I have no self respect. Please help?
POST: I am terrible at breakups.
I usually get broken up with, for one reason or another. And I can not. Move. On. Even months after the fact I am still not over them, still think about them daily... and it doesn't matter if we went out 1 month or 6 months. I still carry on the relationship in my head or imagine us getting back together.
It's not until/unless they entirely cut me off/tell me off that I'm over them. I guess I'm "needy" or uncomfortable with endings. I feel like while I don't need someone to complete me, I feel deficient when I don't have someone, either in real life or in my mind- like I'm walking on a tight rope.
Can anyone help me out here, either by helping figure out what's wrong or tell me how to get over this?
TL;DR: | I usually get broken up with. Can't take it. Sometimes beg. Always cling to the hope that we'll get back together. How to stop this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: I think I need help... Who can I turn to? My family wouldn't understand... Obsessed?
POST: One of the other recent threads had me thinking and now I really need to get this off my chest.
I was so into her, I literally would have taken a bullet for her. We did everything together, I took her every where. Bought her anything she wanted. She wouldn't even have to say she wanted it... We were so close I could just tell. She wasn't greedy or needy, don't get me wrong. She never asked for anything. I was on a leash, I would jump at the drop of a dime. I was right there to wipe her tears and shit got tough. I was there when she needed rides. I was there when she was stranded in the middle of no where. We had the same friends... We loved the same types of music, movies, tv shows.
She broke my heart multiple times yet I didn't care. I had times where it really did feel like I had sharp pain in my chest. I was still there. We had some fights. But eventually one of us would cave and say sorry. After that I would be right back in her pocket, loving every minute of it. She never did make it "official", or put a "label" on us.
Then it happened, we had the biggest fight ever. Words were said, friends were lost, and I'm sure things were burned.
It's been two years since we have talked. I have trouble not thinking about her at least once a day. I got back through every moment with her... What could I have done better, what had I missed the first time around? I figured eventually she would come around and say sorry for the shit she pulled. She never has.
I think I'm obsessed at this point. I try to hate her. I made a fake facebook and added her so I can... Keep tabs I guess. But every time I see her profile it makes me angry. I think it makes me angry because I miss what was.
She felt like she was ... "The one". (Guys, you know what I mean)
Reddit... I miss my never official love, who felt like the one.
TL;DR: | Girl meets boy, boy loves girl, girl semi loves boy, girl hurts boy. boy and girl no talk long time. Boy stalk girl on facebook. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Just found out I am being laid off today.
POST: Not for anything personal, but the company has a mandate that says they can not keep temps passed 9 months. I found this out today when I heard a friend of mine got a job where I work on facebook. After sending an email giving a glowing recommendation for my friend, I received an email back stating that I would be let go at the end of the month. Not for any professional reasons, not because I was late, but because they clean house of temps after 9 months. My last day is at the end of the month. I live in California, is there anything I should do between now and then. I feel fine about working my butt off till then, and I don't really hold a grudge against the company as a whole. But I am just looking for advice on what my next move should be.
TL;DR: | Found out a friend got a got a job, one he didn't rob. Lost it for not being a slob. Looking for a way not to sob. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Au pair [21F] hooking up with single father [39M]
POST: Background: His wife went crazy and left him a while ago, he has not dated anybody since and has three kids. He lives with his cousin and she is helping with the kids as much as possible. I always dreamt about living in the US (I am from Europe) and working with children thus I became an au pair.
I have been here for a while now and we have connected super well from the beginning on. We sit on the couch and talk for hours after the kids go to bed and we always have a lot of fun when we do something together with the kids, he is a real super dad, sadly also super busy with work.
A few months ago I was totally stressed out after a long day of work and he offered a massage. I returned the favor, started groping him and ended up giving him a handjob. This marked the turning point in our relationship. (Which makes me kinda suspicous)
Aside from just sex he really needed someone to talk and seemed to open up more and more. We started considering this a serious relationship after a while.
I really like him and his family but staying here is a life changing decision and I am already starting to question it. Maybe I am just an adventure for him? Would any divorced ~40 yo man consider a long term relationship or even marriage with a woman half his age for more than just sex?
TL;DR: | Not only am I dating my boss I also share a house with him and he is 20 years older than me and I consider staying on a different continent for him, |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I [19M] tell my girlfriend [18F] of 1.5 yrs about my recent spark of trust issues?
POST: I'm a sophomore in college and she just became a freshman. Luckily we attend the same college, but I'm away at an internship for the fall semester so I won't be around. Currently going through a lot of anxiety.
She just moved in and I know she's out meeting a ton of people. I know exactly what she's going through because I went through the same thing. It's hectic and you want space. I'm quite introverted so I didn't do too hot with the whole friends thing. She however is outgoing and as cute as a button.
As implied from the title, I'm worrying nonstop. A close guy friend of hers from high school is also attending the same college and they're already becoming closer with each passing day. She's also been introduced to some of his guy friends. I feel like my girlfriend has a lot of maturing to do (shit, looks who's talking) and may quickly find herself in a "grass is greener" situation.
Lately I've had so much anxiety that I can barely gain an appetite or focus on simple tasks. Do I tell my girlfriend what's going on? I know this stems from insecurity and that the lack of confidence will probably be a huge turnoff for her, but I'm going insane and could use reassurance. By no means do I want to try setting restrictions on her friendships or anything.
TL;DR: | Want to tell my girlfriend about my trust issues but it'll expose my tremendous lack of confidence. Get reassurance or risk pushing her away and/or putting her in a powerful position? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by sending a picture of my dick to a girl
POST: Like most TIFU's, mine wasn't today. It was about 4 years ago in 8th grade.
I was at a friends house during a sleep over with my other friends when one guy, let's call him Kevin, got a random facebook message from this girl no one knew. We, being 14 year old kids with no previous female contact, decided to push him into asking her to send us...NSFW pictures of herself. She replied that we'd all need to do the same. Out of the 4 people there, I was the only one who did it.
I had taken the picture sitting on the toilet in his house with my old laptop camera which wasn't adjustable. Thus making my package appear small. I sent it and I got boob pictures but that person turned out to be this guy who used to be our friend back in kindergarten. He had a grudge against Kevin and he only did this to get Kevin to do it. Luckily he never made friends with anyone else at our school before transferring.
I was panicked when we all went to school the Monday after. I was quiet all day until lunch, that's when Kevin told everyone at our table. Everyone was shocked. One person told me they never thought I'd do something like that. I wanted to die.
For two months Kevin only called me "shrimpy". Eventually I matured enough to let it go. My friends still joke about it to this day but it's nothing more than just joking.
TL;DR: | I was tricked into sending a picture of my 14 y/o dick to an old friend seeking revenge on another friend. |
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