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Please give me reasons to not start cutting myself
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Please. I'm desperate.
| 3 |
Today is 397 days clean- I share grounding/skills that got me here
| null | 8 |
Here we go again - yesterday was 90 days free
| null | 19 |
I've been scratching instead of cutting, so that at least if I actually feel the urge that bad I won't bleed (at least with the way I scratch) but my arm looks and feels odd..
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Like one little spot on my arm isn't bleeding, but it's a little glossy and a bit sticky?? Idk if that's like a super bad thing or not but if you know please inform me
| 12 |
I'm about to relapse, please help
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Disclaimer: English isn't my first language.
I'm F18 and suffer from PTSD. I started SH since I can remember and when I turned about 13 years old I started cutting myself.
I've been to a therapist who has been helping me so much in the last year and I stopped hurting myself. It has been six months since the last time and I think I can't do this any longer.
Lately I keep having nightmares involving me getting hurt in many different ways. I really need someone who has been through this to talk to or even knowing that some strangers on the internet can relate.
Thank you, I needed to get this off my chest.
| 6 |
found razors but DIDN'T relapse
|
hi guys today i found some razor blades in the kitchen and i covered the package with paper towels and put it in a plastic bag and put it back so i couldn't see it and went away to my room
im aware it might not seem very groundbreaking but it did feel like a victory to me.
| 29 |
Relapsed
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After a few months of not hurting myself I self harmed today. I had been having urges for a few weeks now but did everything I could to ignore it and move past it. Today I went down a really dark mental rabbit hole. I’m ashamed to tell my boyfriend and my best friend who are my biggest support system. I know they’ll be supportive, but I feel like I’m letting them down. I’m so disappointed because I thought I was doing so much better.
| 6 |
Accidentally ran into my tools, but didn't relapse
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i was looking through some stuff and stumbled upon where i had hid my stash of tools and such. i had forgotten it was even there. i think i can be proud of that! that i hadnt even been thinking about where my tools are. i dont think im out of the woods yet, but im slowly trying to change my mindset. i'm only a week clean right now, but that was the only time ive done it in several weeks. i've also been taking care of my healing scars by moisturizing and massaging them. i think it helps, to make your mind want to take care of your body instead of hurting it.
| 12 |
Having strong urges
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Hi guys, I've stopped sh since December but lately because of some things I'm working with my therapist I'm feeling really tempted to relapse.
I read somewhere that it was good to tell other people, so that's why I'm writing here, since my friends tonight are busy.
Any advice is welcome
| 10 |
New Milestone! Hard to get excited since ending my 520d streak earlier this year, but I'll take the win! :)
| null | 29 |
Relapse after 5 years
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I relapsed after 5 years. I don’t know why, I’m in a happiest situation I have been in my life, but today it got too much. I feel intense guilt and shame about telling my partner and feel like I have failed and shouldn’t still be doing this at 22. Any love, advice or support would be greatly appreciated.
| 18 |
I just need to redirect the feelings
|
I'm just writing here because the urges are really bad tonight, stronger than they've been in a while. I don't even know if I'll check back in on this account, but I might. I don't want to get into the reasons on here, but I'm going through something that's really testing me, and today was particularly rough. I'm writing here because I just need to get this self-destructive energy out of my brain.
There's no one in my life right now to whom I'd be comfortable admitting that I might be about to relapse. I don't want anyone to worry about me, and specifically my boyfriend knew I was having a bad day today and he tried his best to help me, and so I know it would break his heart if I hurt myself tonight even though he tried to help me feel better. Even if I can't make it the rest of the week without self harming, I have to at least make it till morning because I already told him that what he did helped me. It really did help, but I'm still getting these urges. Maybe if I can ride it out till the end of the night I'll be calm enough to make it through the week. I know I don't have to give in but it's so hard tonight.
I think if I write something here it'll at least help me hold myself accountable till the morning. Since I didn't tell my boyfriend or anybody else that I want to hurt myself tonight, there was no way for me to promise anyone that I wouldn't hurt myself tonight, and I know that sometimes promising someone that you won't do it can be helpful to get through the night, but these days I'm more uncomfortable talking about it than ever before and so I just don't tell anyone when I'm going through this type of thing anymore. However, I can promise reddit that I won't hurt myself tonight, and at least then I will have promised someone. I want to do it so bad but I think if I can get through the night I'll have a better chance of getting through the week.
| 4 |
THANK YOU
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im never this emotional, but today its been 3 months since I've self harmed and have suicidal tendencies. i must thank yall for that. I'm really happy because my college is allowing me to write an article about how much this community has helped me and i thought what better than asking some of you tell me yourself how much this community helped. dm me if you want to help me! please and thanks
| 18 |
My doctor says there's nothing I can do about my scars. I knew this, but...I'm still so sad.
|
I haven't self harmed in over 2 years now. And I think I've reached a point where I don't see myself relapsing ever again. But I have scars, from years and years of self-harm. I've always just pretended they're not really there, or just completely avoided looking in the mirror. They're raised, large scars on my torso and thighs. Some on my arms.
For the past 8-10 months, I've been trying to speak to my dermatologist about them. But always chicken out. I go, and then freak out and ask her something completely different and unrelated instead.
At the back of my mind, I've always known that these kinds of scars won't go away easily. But I maybe held out a slight bit of hope? Last week, I finally showed my dermatologist. And she said there are no creams or simple procedures that can fix these. If anything, we may just be able to fade them a bit, but not really get rid of them. And this just...completely broke me. I've always known the scars will be with me forever. But somehow...her telling me this just flipped something inside me and Ive just been obsessively thinking about it... I'm a grown ass woman with a job and work to do, and all I can think about is how I'm going to be scarred forever. And I can't really explain this to anyone.
I don't know the point of this post. I just needed to vent.
| 20 |
(tw: self harm relapse) any advice on telling my parents i relapsed?
|
hi everyone... i need help. i hope this is the right place to post this.
i've had issues with self harming since i was around 13, mentioning this because when my parents found out back then they thought yelling and being mad at me was the way to go.
i'm currently 20. this year has been one of the worst years in my entire life, if not the worst. i relapsed on early january and i was terrified because my parents would find out sooner or later. with the help of my therapist, we talked to them and they didn't yell, they were actually supportive for once and understood i needed help.
thing is, i relapsed yesterday. i didn't even think it'd leave noticeable scars but it did. my parents will find out eventually, they always do. so now i'm scared. i don't know what would be worse, them finding out or me telling them. even though they were more understanding last time, i still can't get over how they yelled at me when i was a kid and i fear it'll happen again. i don't know what to do. i know telling them myself is probably the best option, but i don't know how. please, any advice is welcome.
| 16 |
I'm very happy rn :D
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I've only make it this long 2 other times. I have a sporting event today, spent the last 2 days with my boyfriend and my birthday is in 6 days! I'm so proud of myself for making it so far (even cleaned my blades without getting the urge to cut)
| 51 |
lmao fuck self harm💀💀
| null | 95 |
9 months, but still having urges daily
| null | 41 |
Tw: Scratch caused a bruise?
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In response to a trauma trigger the other day, I scratched my arm in a couple places. I didn't look at it much after and when I checked it today I have to bruise around one of the scratches. I'm currently putting ice on it.
Has anyone else experienced this before? This is new to me. How do I help the bruise go away?
| 9 |
y'all- (tw)
| null | 16 |
any motivation to stop? i have none
| null | 6 |
Thank you to this community for keeping me motivated, strong and safe. I owe a lot to you. ✨August 15, 2022✨
| null | 35 |
I ran out of razors a month age, and have been to depressed to go and buy new ones.
| null | 19 |
Today is 1 year clean! Here is the post I made on my Facebook page. 🖤🖤
|
I wish there were words to describe why it took 8 tries over the span of 5 years to become 1 year clean of self harm.
It’s even harder to explain how of all the addictions and hurtful, maladaptive behaviors that exist, I chose to hurt myself?
Instead of filling my belly with alcohol or using needles for drugs I instead, during moments of immense emotional turmoil and pain, I took it out on myself. On my body. Tearing at its beautiful skin in an effort to somehow release all that I felt, or at times, an attempt to feel anything at all because I had suppressed my feelings into nothingness and I felt empty and hollow.
It took me 5 years and 7 relapses to get back to this point of being clean for 1 year on this August 15th day.
My pattern was I would usually stay self-harm free for 3 months (96 days was the average) and then I would faulter. I made it to a year once, back in 2017–462 days to be exact. Then something traumatic happened and the dams broke again and despite all my efforts, I hadn’t been able to find my footing since- until now.
From my time working in the mental health field I can tell you from my own eyes and the clinical research that’s been done that self harm does not discriminate against any age, race or religion.
I have met children as young as 8 years old to adults in their 80s that self harm. Women that wear burkas to men who have winkles that age their skin- it exists all around us.
This addiction- this way of coping is not exclusive to just cutting. Some people burn their skin, hit themselves and in some cases, some people even break their bones.
This is not an isolated, uncommon coping mechanism, however I believe it’s the most stigmatized and one that people don’t talk about because it is unfathomable for people to wrap their heads around. So in place of compassion and seeking to understand judgment, shame and guilt take their wrongful place.
People who self harm are often labeled as “dramatic” “attention seeking” “emo” or “crazy.” It’s labeled as something that only troubled, angst-ridden, hormonal teens do. When in reality, if at any age, when someone is engaging in self harm and hurting themselves is the way that they have learned to cope and get relief, instead shows me someone who is really hurting- not attention seeking.
5 years and I’m here again. I couldn’t be more relieved or astonished. I decided a few nights ago to count the boxes of “supplies” I had around the house, consisting of bandages for wound care. I found:
•15 unopened boxes of bandaids
•4 open
•2 adhesive medical tapes
•2 Ace Bandages
•2 unopened Neosporin boxes
These are the lengths I went to in order to protect myself and plan ahead for my inevitable fall when I would reach that 3 month mark and harm again.
Looking at that box made it real for me. So even though I have some reminders stained on my skin, that tangible box scared me.
Addiction comes in many forms- one is not better than the other, one is not more severe or worse as the other- it’s just this one doesn’t get talked about.
I did it. I’m here.
365 days and 5 years later.
I’m here and goddamn it am I proud.
| 12 |
Academic Research Study: Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings Over Time
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We are a research team from the Psychology Department at Harvard University currently working on a study looking at people who harm themselves. The primary goal of the study is to better understand what kinds of thoughts and feelings motivate these behaviors. We are also interested in better understanding how these suicidal thoughts and feelings fluctuate and change over time.
This study has been approved by the mods.
We are interested in recruiting people who use this website to participate in our research study. Participation is completely voluntary. If you are having thoughts of suicide or self-harm, these thoughts are something that should be addressed whether or not you participate in our study.
If you would like to talk to someone, please consider calling a toll-free, 24-hour crisis hotline at 988 in the US, 1.833.456.4566 in Canada, or 116 123 in the UK. For more information on resources in the UK, visit [https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/crisis-services/helplines-listening-services/](https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/crisis-services/helplines-listening-services/) For more information crisis hotlines world-wide, visit [https://findahelpline.com/](https://findahelpline.com/)
If you are interested in participating, you will complete an online screener to see if you qualify to participate. If you qualify, the research team will email you a consent form with more details about the study. If you consent into the study, you will then complete a variety of questionnaires online. Afterwards, you will install a smartphone application that will prompt you to answer a series of very brief questions twenty-one times a day for two weeks.
A few important things to know about the study are:
* The study includes questions regarding self-harm that may trigger negative feelings.
* All information collected is intended to be confidential.
* Participation is completely voluntary. The link we provide below will send you to a website telling you about the study. Once on that site, you can decide whether or not you want to participate. You do not need the smartphone app to complete the screener. If you start to participate and decide you no longer feel comfortable or you are no longer interested, you can end it without any penalty or punishment. We will provide links to treatment resources throughout the study.
* This study will include only participants who are 18 years and older and currently living in North America.
* The smartphone application is compatible with iPhones and Android phones and is uses industry-standard encryption. You can read about the application here ([https://metricwire.com/](https://metricwire.com/)). We will not collect any location or phone data.
* You will be compensated up to $105.50 in online gift cards to Amazon. Compensation is based on how many of the smartphone assessments you complete.
Please click here to complete the screener: [https://harvard.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_6G4tTgN1Z8G0W7c](https://harvard.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_6G4tTgN1Z8G0W7c)
| 11 |
What made/makes you stop if you’ve managed before?
|
Hi!
This year, I relapsed after being clean of cutting for 4 years: I don’t know what to do. My therapist is amazing, a pragmatist, and they’re very sympathetic- but ultimately this change needs to come from me.
I was wondering, for people who have managed to stop, how did you? Was there something that really made you stop? I’ve started being able to go almost a week without it but I’ll inevitably just need that rush of relief it gives me that nothing else can.
I’m working hard in therapy to try overcome things that prevents me from building a life where i have that sense of security which won’t result in me needing it as badly…but in the mean time I was just curious to hear from y’all about it.
Thank you :)
| 9 |
Well. The urges are here again.
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This shit sucks. I’m over 2 years clean, for the second time in my life, and I’ve been struggling. My codependent partner and I tried to go back to being friends and ever since they’ve been cold, distant, occasionally passive aggressive, and have been posting shit about another person saying they’re “almost dating” and calling them the “love of their life.” Meanwhile I feel numb and empty. My depression has only gotten worse. I can’t do shit, I don’t eat, my sleep schedule keeps getting later and later. I don’t feel like I have any passions in life and I’m worried I’ll flunk out of college or get my scholarship appeal rejected and not be able to pay. I want things to get better. But they aren’t. I feel so unloved every day. They’ve been my best friend since 8th grade and now they seem to avoid speaking to me at all costs. It’s really hard to lose the person I went through everything with and trusted with my life. All I want is to make them smile again. My life doesn’t really feel like mine. There’s this big hole inside me and no amount of work or friends or self care or hobbies is fixing it. I’ve felt this way before and it sucked. I dealt with it by cutting and using escapism and maladaptive daydreams to pretend I was somewhere else. I know better now, I have every reason NOT to cut. But I still want to. I want to take all this inside pain and put it on the outside. Once an addict always an addict I guess. Even after 2 years my first instinct is still to hurt myself. These urges are never going to go away. I just wish I knew how to be genuinely happy in my life.
| 7 |
Skills to deal with SH
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Hello guys, i need some help please. My girlfriend is Suffering from panic Attacks and being triggered a bunch. She used to SH a lot but she stopped like a year ago and now her thoughts are getting worse again and I want to help her not doing it. What are your best skills for it to do instead. Because I want to pack a box with things that can help her and I am not 100% sure what to put in it, because I never experienced that. I want to support her in the best way possible, because i love her so much, so i thought of this. It should be like a first aid kit but for her when she feels bad against SH. So what would you put into it? :)
Thank you in advance guys!
| 16 |
10 months today… :) last time i posted here, it was a little over 3 months. i am smiling so hard.
| null | 51 |
TW: Have you ever been too depressed to self-harm?
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Just an example: maybe whatever tool you would typically use is across the room, and you think "I'm gonna feel like shit later. I'll just do it then.".
| 17 |
You guys 🥹. I'm so proud.
| null | 88 |
how do i make my cuts heal faster?
|
i have a lot on my arms, i’m supposed to be going to the pool in 2 weeks and i can’t say no to my parents
i haven’t cut myself in like a day, if anyone knows how i can make it at less a little faster at healing or less visible that would be very appreciated
also in the meantime i’m trying to stop making more so i would also appreciate advice on how i can stop (i can’t go to a professional so that option is not there)
also throwaway bc my family knows my account lol
| 9 |
I lost my battle
|
I lost my battle today. I tried to drive to clear my mind but I couldn’t get anything off of my mind. Everything was swimming around in my head and more stress, more anxiety, more bad thoughts, deeper depression and I couldn’t handle it anymore. I sat in my car and cut myself until I felt better. I don’t know how to stop. I tried talking to my “friends” but I was pushed to the side and I have no one. I don’t want to live like this anymore.
| 18 |
How to hide SH while swimming?
|
I have scars on my left arm, all down my forearm, and my family just set up a new pool. I want to go in it really bad but I don't know how without them finding out. I have stopped for 8 days today I'm really trying to stop and I just don't want them to find out.
| 11 |
urges + intrusive thoughts.
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**--tw for sh and drinking--**
i have a candle in my room, and i thought about lighting it, to help myself calm down (just fought w someone) and my mind tells me, *'they don't care, burn yourself, burn yourself, nobody will notice, nobody will care.'* at the same time, another part of my mind is telling me *'go, you know they have drinks downstairs, drown your sorrows.'* and finally, to top it all off, i *also* have the urge to slit my wrists
help please- distraction or whatever, but i'm not sure why i shouldn't.. i'll be fine, so why not right?
| 4 |
I’m tired of worrying people.
|
Sorry for the vent but I wish I had better control over this kind of stuff. Yesterday I let myself get scratched by a dirty needle while cleaning up garbage at my job and I haven’t really brought it up with anyone due to indifference and I really regret that. I’m often scared to bring this up because it hurts more seeing people worry for me.
| 25 |
3 months clean!!!
| null | 54 |
Participate in a Research Study on Online Self-Injury Activities (ages 18-35; Earn up to $20)
|
Hi there! I am a doctoral student in Fordham University’s Mood & Behaviors Lab, conducting a study on the immediate psychological effects of accessing online content or engaging in online activities related to self-injury. My study aims to understand how people engage with this content online and how it affects their mental health.
In order to participate in this study you must:
* Access or engage with content online relating to self-injurious thoughts and behaviors at least two times per week
* Be 18-35 years old
* Be comfortable reading and speaking English
* Have access to your own smartphone
Your participation is completely voluntary, and you can end the study at any time. All data collected in this study is confidential.
If you are interested in participating in the study, please click on the link below. This study involves a 20-25 minute survey at this link followed by one week of short 1-2 minute surveys before and after you access online content related to self-injurious thoughts and behaviors. Participants will be compensated up to $20 in Amazon gift cards.
[https://bit.ly/shonlinestudy](https://bit.ly/shonlinestudy%22%20%5Ct%20%22_blank)
We hope that this research helps us better understand online experiences surrounding self-injurious thoughts and behaviors. Please reach out to me with any questions. Thank you very much for your time!
| 11 |
I didn’t hurt myself this time.. & im pretty proud of me..
|
I have always lurked this subreddit but never posted..
I’ve been going through something really horrible the past couple days, & i can say with honesty that I don’t want to hurt myself.
No matter how hurt I’ve been feeling by this person..
I’m still in control & i don’t feel the need to do that to myself. I guess I’m just surprised by myself considering my current situation.
539 days strong.
This hasn’t been easy…
| 24 |
It's been 2 years, 8 months and 23 days since I last self-harmed but I still want to regularly
|
I keep an app counter. I started it when I set out to stop self harming and it's been counting up ever since. It's been that long and that should seem like a number to be proud of I guess when I was self harming every day several times a day.
But after all that time I still want to just as much. They say addictions eventually you want it less and less and it may never entirely go away but it'll significantly fade.
But I still want to every day. Especially lately I feel very close. I feel terrible lately, I'm hating myself and where my life has ended up, I'm feeling a ton of shame, no hope whatsoever. It feels like I want nothing more than to cut or burn myself. I still remember the rush and how much better I feel in the moment.
I don't feel proud because I haven't actually gotten rid of these feelings and I still feel I will relapse someday. It may be soon, I don't know.
| 19 |
hi
|
i feel like im fucking insane i cant open up to anyone because they leave my addictions grow more insatiable by the day. the more i slash my thighs the worse it gets. getting deeper and deeper and longer and longer. losing more and mkre blood. im hoping one of these days its enough to pass out and die. the cuts are so cute they make me feel pretty. i just want them all over. i love seeing the blood dripping from the razor blade. i love the pain. i love how deep my breaths are and how shakey my hand is. then i go numb. i feel no emotions. and i slash and slash. so deep you can see the 2nd layer of skin. i fucking love the feeling. i cant even cry anymore. ive gone numb. my days are meaningless. theyre voids. its just pain now. seeing the few i love leave me. i dont love my parents. or my friends. or my siblings. infact, i want half of them dead. and i dont care whos hands the blood is on. suicide is inevitable without change. my days are numbered. i want nothing to destroy my body.i can’t stop. im not even sad anymore. i’m just numb. i can’t fall asleep at night knowing i didn’t slash my legs open. i get sad when the cuts fade. i want them there… forever. scars won’t be enough. i need to perpetually cut, deeper and deeper, every layer of skin, the epidermis, dermis, fat, fascia, muscle. i won’t stop. the lust for blood will forever remain insatiable, my mind is an enigma, nothing can make me happy, it just prolongs my sadness. my appetite for pain can never be satisfied.all the pain i have caused to my self and others grows indifferent to me. it’s just a little game i play, it’s fun. how much blood can i spill from my body, how long can i go. i love the feeling i get, slashing at my thighs. i’m desensitized to it all. i love running my fingers through the blood. I am infatuated with it. the crimson red substance, pooling on my pale skin. seeing the pretty cuts after i finally wipe the blood off. i get upset seeing them fade. it saddens me, seeing my hard work.. gone. the motion of the blade has became second nature to me. i no longer feel the need to think. i close my eyes and slash. i’m never satisfied. my bloodlust forever grows. the cutting is a gateway into death, i touch it, but i do not join it.. yet. i could write a master thesis on fluid dynamics from observing how blood drips off the blade. how it pools, it rolls, it drips, it stains. the scarlet color. the viscosity, noticeably different than water. running my hand through the pools leaves a vermillion color stained into my skin. how the cuts open and let blood out. it only gets worse and worse, i’ll eventually hit fat, maybe even muscle. if i strike an artery i might bleed out. then the cycle would be over.blood is so pretty. the way light bounces off it. the way it forms in beads from a cut. the way multiple cuts can make a larger pool. cuts are even more beautiful. the way the immediately turn red. I'm so fucking insane my posts have been deleted from r/selfharm. i need help man. please someone help.
| 13 |
Can’t stop getting urges
|
I’ve been clean for like 7 weeks now but the urges to cut are seriously killing me. I get them so often and it feels like it’s been getting more intense as time goes on. I don’t even need a reason anymore, I just want to do it at random times. Sometimes I just get the blade and press it to my skin without actually cutting (it just makes a little dent). Just to pretend. Does this literally ever end or am I just always supposed to live like this
| 21 |
I was looking for a picture of my skin for a routine before and after and was accidentally reminded of how far I've come. [TW - Blood, no pictures]
|
I put "cheek" into my Google Photos search bar and scrolled back a bit too far. I'm not sure why but Google showed me a lot of pictures/videos from late 2021/early 2022 that I took of deep wounds with my bathroom and clothes covered in blood.
I see my scars every day and still feel like a freak, but those pictures reminded me how much closer to normal I am. When I was there, I never would have thought where I am now is possible. I wouldn't have even thought trying it worth it. I'm not perfect, but I am so much better than I was then.
I'm 192 days sober, and I didn't realize how much I had improved in those days. Life is long. Don't give up on a goal because you have to wait. Today I am accidentally really proud of myself, and it's awesome.
| 7 |
endlich die erste von zwei Wochen geschafft
| null | 23 |
im really struggling
|
Before it had been 9 weeks since any SH, its now been 4 weeks. I'm getting panic attacks going out alone, I'm withdrawing from everything and I just stare and think all day about doing it. Then I have this internal argument about what's helpful and what's f#cked up, and how stupid I am and how much of a failure I am at the moment.
I've got to play happy and all's ok but I'm really hitting that wall, hell, I'm being crushed by it. I'm at the point where if I could find a way to end everything without anyone being able to blame themselves somehow, I'd do it.
| 10 |
Update: filigree tattoo on both upper arms (for symmetry) to commit to stopping self harm/cutting CW: 3rd slide shows self harm scars
| null | 38 |
GUILT, SHAME AND BLAME experienced by SOs in a support role - mod approved research post
|
Hey everyone, as part of my doctoral thesis\* I've developed a questionnaire to shed some light on how guilt, shame and blame impacts the loved ones of someone with mental health needs. If you, or someone close to you, provides informal mental health support and notice these emotions showing up in the relationship, I would really appreciate hearing from you.
People who have completed the survey have reported finding the differences between guilt and shame insightful and highlighted how it helped them understand more about their emotional experience in the relationship. A community-wide benefit is that the outcomes of the research will be used to improve resources for SOs so that they can be supported more in their role, essentially helping the helpers.
The whole survey takes around 15-20 minutes and after understanding more about your current emotional state, it goes through a range of scenarios to see how you would likely respond if it were to happen today. All answers are scales so there is minimal typing and it is mobile friendly.
You can read more or access the study here: [https://lancasteruni.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_9AWrvoYWvPCqTu6](https://lancasteruni.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_9AWrvoYWvPCqTu6)
The person supported doesn't need a formal diagnosis but they need to have accessed mental health support (medication, therapy, etc) for 6 months or more. The survey is available internationally and recognises all types of informal support, be it financial, practical or emotional.
Thanks everyone. I really value the input from the self-harm community as we know it tends to impact loved ones in a unique way and for me as a researcher it is a really valuable opportunity to make sure that these voices are heard.
\*The project has ethical approval from the Faculty of Health and Medicine at Lancaster University.
| 10 |
Is mental self harm count as self harm relapse ?
|
I telling to my self i am worh nothing, i am idiot, i am ugly etc. I also watching things that trigger me.
| 15 |
participants needed for research into the relationship between sleep paralysis, self-harm and suicidality
|
Hello,
We are currently recruiting individuals to participate on a voluntary basis in our research study exploring the relationship between sleep paralysis, self-harm, and suicidality. The study is open to everyone who is over the age of 18 and a fluent English speaker. You do not need a diagnosis of sleep paralysis or have experienced self-harm or suicidality to participate. The study is a series of questionnaires which will take no longer than 25 minutes to complete. The questions will address depression, sleep paralysis, self-harm, and suicide. Therefore, if these subject areas may be upsetting to you, we strongly advise that you do not participate. If you choose to participate and are negatively impacted by the study, you can stop the questionnaire at any time. Any answers you provide in the study will remain completely confidential. If you would like to participate, please follow the link below. You will be directed to the information sheet, consent form and the questionnaires.
Link: [https://chester.onlinesurveys.ac.uk/sleep-paralysis-and-self-harm-and-suicidality](https://chester.onlinesurveys.ac.uk/sleep-paralysis-and-self-harm-and-suicidality)
Further questions Any further questions can be addressed to the student researcher or the supervisor using the following emails: Zara Philpott [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]) (Supervisor) Dr Kevin Hochard [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]) Thank you, Zara Philpott
| 2 |
been clean since april but the Urges Are Immense and my skin Burns
| null | 6 |
what app do you use?
|
just wanted to ask what app y'all use for tracking your days clean and also a rating for it out of 10. thx in advance
\- M
| 5 |
baby steps. before this I had hit 6 months. today I threw out my razor because I don't shave since I came out as nonbinary.
| null | 27 |
I got triggered really bad but I didnt self-harm
|
I'm really proud of myself. i felt really really awful for the entire evening, just super anxious and hopeless. but i still didnt hurt myself! i just waited it out and felt better the next day.
| 14 |
I’m oddly proud today
| null | 76 |
Requesting some positive words for my upcoming tattoo to combat self harm! (I don’t know how to add both pic & text in my post, more in comments)
| null | 29 |
7 months clean. I remember struggling to go a day without it so this is a huge milestone for me😄
| null | 19 |
Self harming while in session?
|
So today I had a session and the things we were talking about were making me anxious. I told him and he apologized and tried to rephrase everything. (Not in any way his fault because I need to talk about these things, and I even brought them up. I just wanted to let him know that I was anxious about it) but anyways, I don’t think he noticed but I was digging my nails into my arm the entire session. I came out and had a lot scratches on my forearm. First, do other people do this? Like I’ve never done it but I just want to know that I’m not alone and that other people have experienced this. And second do I bring it up to him in our next session?
| 11 |
I created a subreddit to post about your victories throughout the day no matter the size
|
It's an uplifting community where you can post the things you've accomplished big or small and be proud of it. [https://www.reddit.com/r/TheSmallVictories/](https://www.reddit.com/r/TheSmallVictories/)
| 15 |
Hitting myself
|
I just can't stop, I am getting ignored on other subreddits and I really need help. Am I getting ignored because it's not "valid" or "as damaging"? Should I stop worrying? Am I even self harming?
| 17 |
We're going to be scattering my mom's ashes tomorrow
|
i'm really scared i'll relapse in either sh or alcohol. i dont want to relapse. her death hasn't felt real to me except for a few moments here and there. it doesnt feel like she's gone, still feels like i could just see her any day. what if tomorrow makes it 100% real in my head? what if i can't handle it? i wanna be able to grieve in a healthy way but i don't know how. so far its just been dissociating and self-harming. my scars are starting to heal and i'm trying so hard to let them, and to not make new ones.
| 16 |
How can I break free of the want/need to self harm?
|
The problem I keep having is that no matter how long I can stay clean- the longest I ever was was maybe two months- I still constantly want to self harm. Even thinking about it feels weirdly great. This always eventually leads me back to self-harm, and I keep going deeper and deeper to the point where I def should've gotten stitches for my last one (although I did not) so I would sort of like to quit. I mean, I don't really... just imagining the idea of never cutting again feels impossible right now... but my dad has insisted upon me trying to quit, and I don't want to d!e accidentally or something... is it possible to get out of that spot in my mind? And how easy is it to actually permanently quit self harm?
| 10 |
Sh scars and work help!
|
My legs are super scarred and relatively recent and/or severe so very noticeable. I've worked very hard to not be ashamed and if I'm wearing an outfit where my scars show then it is what it is.
However I'm worried about people in work seeing them, I think my worry is people finding it unprofessional? But the weather is so so warm at the moment so I want to wear dresses to work, I'd still wear tights so they wouldn't be super visible unless someone was close to me or sat down next to me. I just wanted opinions, do you think it would be okay to try tights or just keep wearing trousers/jeans?
| 6 |
Years and years clean, first tattoo brought the urge back
|
I’m in my early 30s and got my first tattoo five days ago. Inner bicep. I’ve had some ideations the last year or two in my darkest moments, but haven’t acted on them.
I was fine at the start of my tattoo appointment (“Damn, you’re taking it really well for your first”) but about 10-15 minutes in I felt myself start to dissociate and enter my SH headspace. I haven’t been there in well over a decade. I’ve been doing EMDR therapy for six months and was able to use those skills to settle myself before asking for a water break. I don’t talk about my history with most of those close to me, let alone someone I just met. Made it through the rest of the session (barely an hour for some linework) but needed serious decompression time after coming home.
I know I’m not in any danger of harming right now. I’m proud of the resilience I’ve built, but hell it’s terrifying to experience that headspace again and *like it.*
| 14 |
Something that helped with my sh
|
I don’t know if this will help anyone else, but once I stopped self harming, and stopped seeing new cuts, I started to draw on myself constantly.
Not just cuts and/or blood, but I would doodle all over my arms (I would draw stars and planets, specifically) and it helped distract me from thoughts about self harming again.
It also helped cover up old and triggering scars.
| 16 |
MIA
|
Hey guys just wanted to let you all know that im donating a kidney this week so after today I'll be MIA for a while. I'll be thinking of you guys, please be kind to each other and help one another out. Mod u/renavenisoverit will be pulling double duty so be kind and have patience.
| 15 |
ideas???
|
i’ve been clean from self harm for a few months and i finally just turned 18. my scars on my arms are completely healed and barely noticeable, but my legs are a different story. after i started working i had to move from my arm to my upper thigh so it wasn’t noticeable as i work in customer service.
well now it’s the summertime, and my favorite thing probably in the world is going to the beach. my scars on my leg are all healed, but still very dark and noticeable. it’s embarrassing and i know it makes everyone very uncomfortable. i want that part of my life to be over.
i want to cover them up. the problem is, this will be my first bigger tattoo and i’m having trouble thinking of ideas. any advice would be appreciated <3
| 8 |
Research project: Understanding and helping adults who self-harm. Thank you for reading!
|
Hello,
My name is Mirabel. I am a researcher at University of Nottingham. You might recognise this post as I posted a couple of weeks back. We are really grateful to those who came forwards to take part from my last post.
We are interested in understanding how patterns of self-harm may differ between autistic and non-autistic people. We are really grateful so many autistic people who have come forwards for our study already. We would really like to welcome a few more **(UK-based) non-autistic people** into our study so that we can develop better understanding and tailored support for everyone.
As a first step, we invite you to a short online meeting so you can ask questions about the research and we can discuss the most convenient and comfortable for you to take part. There is a 4 minute video about the card sort task here: [https://tinyurl.com/352wj76e](https://tinyurl.com/352wj76e) . You can complete all project tasks online if you prefer and all data is anonymised to protect your confidentiality.
Thank you so much for considering taking part in our study. We are really grateful. Please do get in touch if you have any comments or questions at all.
Mirabel [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected])
​
https://preview.redd.it/x2keqlzsuz591.png?width=588&format=png&auto=webp&s=b705990bd4187de218842b93cf3beb6482cecbed
| 4 |
Y’all!
| null | 50 |
Just putting down what helps me, I hope it can help you too! (I hope I'm posting this in the right place)
|
I just want to say that I am not in any way for form a professional so, no one has to follow the strategies that I've listed, they are just things that I find work for me, personally. Anyway, I've been dealing with self-harm for 3 years now. Not very long, but I found a few things that work for me. So here they are:
1. Drawing on myself - I've been doing it for a little while now and it seems to be kind of effective. I've noticed that the areas of my skin with marking from past cuts tend to fade sooner than the rest, so I get wrapped up in doing the designs over and over again. It becomes very time-consuming
2. Writing out song lyrics in cursive (or any other writing style)- I'm not sure if this one will work for everyone, but I find that writing song lyrics in cursive takes all my focus and attention. I get emersed in perfecting each letter/word. It's not always easy to get into, but once you find a rhythm it really helps.
3. Talking to someone - I've noticed that when I'm busy with something or talking to someone, I become unable to SH as I am preoccupied. I'm not suggesting that you talk to someone about self-harm but rather just talk to someone to talk to them. It might help if you're distracted or just enjoying yourself? I'm not sure how to explain it.
4. Watching a show/movie - I used to watch something that I enjoyed or loved. It never worked for me, because I can't always turn on the TV in the middle of the night but when I'm on a device I have the luck of being able to use YouTube or other websites to distract myself and sometimes feel better. I'm not sure if it would work for everyone, but it could help!
5. Watching comforting videos - I started making a folder with links to funny or stupid stuff to cheer me up when I have a bad urge or feel really suicidal. I think that's also very helpful too.
6. Music - I'm sure this is a strategy that everyone has used at some point, but I'm still going to explain it anyway. I started making different playlists for moods and to help me feel better. Typically listening to sad/sad-ish music doesn't really help with feeling better or elevated. For that reason, I've been making lists or looking for lists with music from when I was younger or just happy/positive-like music to help when I feel down or have urges. Be careful of the songs you choose, because sometimes certain songs can trigger memory and things like that and it won't really benefit you.
7. Pets - I don't have any pets, but I find that when I am and I watch a dog or a cat or even get to pet one, I feel slightly better or happier. If you don't have a pet or are allergic, there are always cute animal videos and stupid gifs of cats doing dumb things. Here's one that I find funny for some stupid reason:
[ ](https://i.redd.it/uwwnn90ro1591.gif)
I hope this list helps you or someone you know that needs support. I hope everyone and anyone who reads this feels better or learns more positive coping strategies. Sending y'all lots of love and hugs. I really do hope whoever is struggling gets better. I hope you have a wonderful day <3
| 15 |
Research: Invitation to participate in an international and anonymous study on self-harm and social media. The study consists of a survey and interview, both of which are optional - read more below. Thank you for your time!
|
Hi!
You may have seen a similar post to this some weeks ago looking for participants for a research project. The research project is now officially starting with a survey and interviews hence why I am posting it again - now with links :-)
Are you 18 years of age or older and do you frequent any type of social media related to self-harm?
My name is Leah. I am currently working with my university on a research project about self-harm and online communities. We're interested in openly exploring thoughts, feelings, and experiences related to self-harming, including what it’s like to be part of an online community where such thoughts, feelings, and experiences are shared. An online community may be a Facebook group, an Instagram account, a Twitter account, a Tumblr account, a sub-Reddit, a website, or any other social media forum or online message board focused on or often relating to self-harm content.
We are hoping that you may be interested in participating in this study in order to help scientists, psychologists, doctors, and others to better understand self-harm so that we may better be able to help those who seek help for behaviour, thoughts, and feelings related to self-harm.
The study consists of two parts: a questionnaire and an interview and you may participate in either one or both of these.
* **The** **questionnaire**: This [link](https://www.sdu.dk/da/forskning/videnscenter_for_psykotraumatologi/projekt+om+koensforskelle+i+traumereaktioner) will take you to a secure website which contains detailed participant information including information on the study and how your data is treated. If you wish to participate in the study after having read this, you may continue directly to the questionnaire from there. You may skip questions that you do not wish to answer. You may exit the questionnaire at any time you wish, but you will not be able to return. Upon having finished the questionnaire you will be asked if you wish to join an online presentation of the main findings once the study has concluded. If you wish to do so, you will be given the option to share your e-mail in a new window so that it cannot be linked to your questionnaire responses. If you provide us with your email address, you will receive an invitation to the presentation at a later time. No individual data will be shared.
* **The** **interview**: I will be the one conducting the interviews on an online secure connection. The interviews are confidential and no identifiable information will be shared. The interview will be carried out in an informal manner with your comfort as my main priority. There are no right or wrong answers and you may deny to answer any questions that make you feel uncomfortable or leave the interview at any time. If you are interested or even just a little curious, you can contact the project leader at [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]). She will then answer any questions that you may have about the project and provide you with my e-mail address to set up a time for the interview. Please make sure not to include any sensitive personal information in the e-mail, as we cannot ensure a secure connection at both ends. Prior to starting the interview itself I will tell you about the interview and answer any questions you may have. We will only begin the interview if and when you feel comfortable to do so. The interview will be recorded but only the audio will be saved. I will have my camera on during the interview unless you prefer for me not to. It is up to you whether you prefer to have yours on or off.
We understand that this topic can be highly sensitive, and your safety and comfort are our highest priority. You may exit the questionnaire or interview at any time. Any information you choose to share with us will be treated respectfully and confidentially in accordance with European law on data regulation (GDPR) and ethical guidelines for research (you can read more about this on the secure website).
If this sounds like something you’d be interested in participating in or if you have any questions at all, please do not hesitate to contact the project leader Dr. Dorte M. Christiansen. We will do our best to answer any questions you may have. Please make sure to not include any personal information in your email.
All participants who are interested will be given the opportunity to participate in an online presentation of the study’s main findings once data collection has completed.
We thank you for your time and hope very much that you will decide to participate.
Best wishes,
Leah G. L. Christensen on behalf of:
​
Dr. Dorte M. Christiansen, PhD
National Center for Psychotraumatology and Department of Psychology
University of Southern Denmark
Denmark, Europe
Email: [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected])
| 10 |
3 Years Clean. Never thought I could do it.
| null | 130 |
Drawing on myself helps me to not self harm
| null | 83 |
5 years vs 5 days…
|
One of my high-school friends said they were 5 years self-harm free today. Meanwhile I’m only 5 days clean with no true desire to stop. I feel so inferior. I’m 24 now and I’ve been self-harming since age 11. Will I ever recover???
| 3 |
I’m about to relapse and nobody cares.
|
I went to Reddit to get advice on this. Or to just get someone to weigh in. I found this subreddit.
I’m about to relapse. I feel that feeling where my heart drops and I’m hyper aware of my arms and all I can think about is my next steps in getting a blade.
The worst part is nothings horrible right now. I’m passing all my classes, my friends are all happy with me and nothing is going on.
my friends ex tried to get me to come to his house today, but that should warrant all these feelings right?
Is it bad that I want someone to talk me down right now. Can someone talk to me right now?
Edit: I’d just like to say, I have no streak at all. Im not clean at all the last time I cut was 3 weeks ago.
| 9 |
Affirmations for PTSD are positive statements that you repeat over and over again to help change your mindset and create a positive attitude. They can also help you cope with difficult emotions like fear, anger, sadness and guilt.
| null | 5 |
Research: Understanding and helping autistic and non-autistic adults who self-harm
|
I am Mirabel - a researcher at University of Nottingham. We are interested in understanding how experiences of self-harm may differ between autistic and non-autistic people.
We are really grateful so many autistic people who have come forwards for our study already. We would really love to welcome a few more (UK-based) non-autistic people into our study so that we can contribute to the development of better understanding and tailored support for everyone.
As a first step, we invite you to a short online meeting so you can ask questions about the research and we can discuss the most convenient and comfortable for you to take part. Our study can be done fully online now and all data is anonymised to protect confidentiality. There is a 4 minute video about the card sort task for self-harm here [https://tinyurl.com/352wj76e](https://tinyurl.com/352wj76e).
Thank you so much for considering taking part in our study. We are really grateful. Please do get in touch if you have any comments or questions at all.
Mirabel [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected])
​
https://preview.redd.it/t65hzt4jpl191.png?width=502&format=png&auto=webp&s=139796d965a0e6a7d4dd862dab319a50ce4bf8ff
| 7 |
4 Reasons Why I’m Stopping Self-Harm (IMPORTANT)
|
-I am worth not damaging my body. ☀️
-I am worthy of healing. 🌈
-I am strong enough to recover. 💪🏻
-There are a lot of people who care about me who want me to stop self-harming. 👨👩👧👦
| 38 |
snyone mind talking?
|
I feel horrible my anxiety is going crazy anyone mind talking for a bit? Preferely another girl i wouldnt feel comfortable talking to a guy
| 9 |
am I too young for this?
|
I'm only 14 and I feel like I have no right self harming or feeling this way, I'm still a kid so I don't really have to worry about things outside of school and home but that's also the stuff that had lead me to sh. Seeing what other people do makes me feel as if I am excluded from the people who actually had/have good reasons to do this.
I'm just very confused and don't know how to feel, any input would be greatly appreciated and I apologize for how this is worded.
| 17 |
The Affect, Suicide, Self-Injury, and Social Triggers (ASSIST) Lab at the University of Notre Dame is looking for individuals interested in participating in paid research.
|
Are you currently 18 years or older and have a history of nonsuicidal self-injury (NSSI)?
You may be eligible to participate in a brief 20-minute survey that aims to better understand the experience of self-injury, as well as opinions related to a recently proposed Nonsuicidal Self-Injury Disorder, among those with a lived experience. You will be entered into a raffle to win a $20 gift card for your participation.
In addition to completing to the online survey, you will have the option to participate in one of 40 follow-up interviews (one-hour in length) about your experiences. Participants who complete the interview will receive an additional $20 gift card.
If interested in completing the baseline survey, please following this link:
[https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_55BLwjOxIRhkBFz](https://nd.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_55BLwjOxIRhkBFz)
Thank you.
| 12 |
Looking for individuals who have experience of self-harm* to take part in an online research study about online support
|
Many people who have hurt themselves on purpose turn to the Internet for help, and we want to see what types of online support for self-harm are most helpful.
The study will take less than 30 minutes to complete. Those who take part can choose to be entered into a prize draw to win one of four £50 Love2shop gift vouchers.
The study is conducted by researchers at the University of Bristol. For further information, and for details on how to take part, please visit this link: https://research.sc/participant/login/dynamic/F7276A95-FE55-4E9A-86B4-AE67381997C1.
You can also contact [email protected] with any questions about the study.
Please note, the content in the study does not include any physical details of self-harm, but it is possible the subject matter may be triggering or upsetting to those who have experience of self-harm. It is up to you to decide if you would like to take part and you are free to exit the study at any point if you change your mind. You will also be provided with a list of support services.
*To be eligible for this study, you will need to have self-harmed in the past year. You will also need to be at least 16 years of age, a resident in the United Kingdom, and fluent in English.
| 9 |
Here’s a reminder that you will meet your person
| null | 38 |
First day. I can do this, I think.
| null | 43 |
Please talk me out of breaking my 3 year clean streak
|
In 9 days it will have been 3 years since my last sh. I have a very strong urge right now because I'm overwhelmed with emotions. Please talk me out of it, I don't want to relapse.
| 16 |
100 days SH free!!!!
| null | 26 |
Feeling raw
|
Usually don't write here but since there are urges to calm myself I do ... and try to ignore the thoughts again. Partially I do hate myself. Early 30s, therapist wants me to cut out my family and dear god 'don't go back studying, become independent! please' (👌Snip! ...nothing happened)
I suck at romance mainly because of anxiety and knowing that I lack in essence, what can I show? Other people are more capable, I know I am just pretty to look at... but I have a disability that put the wind out of me still, mentally and partially sometimes physically...
......... no idea how to not feel bad right now since I need to go to bed to be fit tomorrow. And I can't stand my parttime work at the moment.. really thinking about spending all holiday days I've got left and have the rest of the month free...and no puffering days should I need them again.
.... this is lousy... I don't qualify really to be here, I've got barely anything left to show, it's just stupid urges and passive ideation in the farther background for those I am mostly too tired to regard them.
| 3 |
Im 314 days clean of self harm and my scars are still very visible
|
its getting hot, i wanna wear shirts again but i have a lot of very visible scars that im endlessly ashamed of. i know this amount of deep scars will never completely fade so i have to make peace with them but i dont know how. i am so ashamed of them
| 12 |
i relapsed
|
for the first time in 4 years i relapsed, my life’s in shambles currently
| 6 |
I feel I’m too old for this
|
Apologize first. The title is not meant to offend anyone of any age. I developed this coping mechanism after teenager years, and I haven’t been able to stop till now. There’s a voice inside my head keeps saying it’s so not okay for a fully grown adult to cut themselves. It’s a sign of lack of ability to cope and express. It’s shameful and immature and I just can’t process the fact that I keep cutting myself.
Now summer is coming and I panicked. I have a “normal” life if you don’t look too closely. No one knows I’ve been cutting myself. I got an internship and I’ll need to work with kids. How to hide the scars and wounds? Am I even able to take the responsibility? Why the hell do I hurt myself in the first place? I’m already on medication, and therapy sessions are on the way. But somehow it feels like this will never end.
| 14 |
I have a tip for SH, alternatives for SH.
|
I recently told my therapist that mine has recently gotten bad. She gave me a tip and i want to share it for others who are struggling and want to get better.
Ice and red food color along where you want to sh
a frozen citrusy fruit
or journal.
i hope this also helps someone:)
| 14 |
Body Image & Self Harm: Fully Remote Paid Study
|
Hi everyone,
My name is Julia and I am writing to you from Massachusetts General Hospital, where I work in our Body Dysmorphic Disorder Program. We are running a smartphone research study in which we are seeking to understand the day to day factors that contribute to negative thoughts, self harm, and/or substance use in people with severe appearance concerns.
We are looking for adults (18+) with severe appearance concerns in the United States who might be interested in participating. The study is fully remote, with no in-person visits, and participants are compensated for their involvement.
If you are interested in participating or learning more, please visit our website [https://mghocd.org/bddphonestudy/](https://mghocd.org/bddphonestudy/). Fill out the brief survey at the bottom of the site, and if it looks like you may be a good fit, someone from our research team will be in touch!
Best,
Julia
| 8 |
How to deal with trigger's?
|
I'm almost 6 months clean of sh and I already be at a doctor but she leave me 8 months ago and the only thing she did was give me medication. Now I'm not at any doctor because my mom doesn't really want that. Since then I already sh 2 times but my mom doesn't know about it because the last time she scream at me and was disappointed.
I thought I didn't think more about this but I feel ashamed when I look at my wrist or like yesterday in science class that we were talking about cuts and how our body cure it and I started to think over and over again about this and I couldn't stop. Also I start to read "Heartstopper" and I hadn't any ideia that in volume 4 talk about so deep about mental illness and at the same time I feel comfortable reading it but also triggered.
I been able to control myself I think because I made myself promise that I would be 1 year clean but I don't know how to deal when I hear someone talking about this topics because I can't be like in a science test and just frozen because they are talking about cuts.
I know that this maybe be something that will never go away but anyone have any suggestions how to deal better with this type of situation?
| 13 |
Research: Looking for participants with experience of self-harm and active on social media related to self-harm. Would you be interested in sharing your experience in an online interview where comfort and openness is prioritized? See post below. Thank you for your time!
|
Hi!
Are you 18 years of age or older, active on any type of social media with a focus on self-harm and would you be interested in participating in an interview?
My name is Leah. I am currently working with my university on a research project about self-harm and online communities. We're interested in openly exploring thoughts, feelings, and experiences related to self-harming, including what it’s like to be part of an online community where such thoughts, feelings, and experiences are shared. An online community may be a Facebook group, an Instagram account, a Twitter account, a Tumblr account, a sub-Reddit, a website, or any other social media forum or online message board focused on or often relating to self-harm content.
The project consists of two parts – an interview described below, and a survey which there is more information on [here](https://www.sdu.dk/da/forskning/videnscenter_for_psykotraumatologi/projekt+om+koensforskelle+i+traumereaktioner) and a direct link to the survey is also available through that link.
We are currently looking for individuals who would be interested in participating in an online interview. I will be the one to do the interviews on an online secure connection. The interviews are confidential and no identifiable information will be shared. The interview will be carried out in an informal manner with your comfort as my main priority. There are no right or wrong answers and you may deny to answer any questions that make you feel uncomfortable or leave the interview at any time. If you are interested or even just a little curious, you can contact the project leader at [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected]) She will then answer any questions that you may have about the project and provide you with my e-mail address to set up a time for the interview. Please make sure not to include any sensitive personal information in the e-mail, as we cannot ensure a secure connection at both ends. Prior to starting the interview itself I will tell you about the interview and answer any questions you may have. We will only begin the interview if and when you feel comfortable to do so. The interview will be recorded but only the audio will be saved. I will have my camera on during the interview unless you prefer for me not to. It is up to you whether you prefer to have yours on or off.
We understand that this topic can be highly sensitive, and your safety and comfort are our highest priority. Any information you choose to share with us will be treated respectfully and confidentially in accordance with European law on data regulation (GDPR) and ethical guidelines for research. If interested, more detailed information on participation and data handling is available.
We thank you for your time and hope very much that you will decide to participate.
​
Best wishes,
Leah G. L. Christensen on behalf of:
Dr. Dorte M. Christiansen, PhD
National Center for Psychotraumatology and Department of Psychology
University of Southern Denmark
Denmark, Europe
Email: [[email protected]](mailto:[email protected])
| 3 |
help…
|
so i have a tattoo appointment in four days and have fresh cuts on my arms. The tattoo is on my ribs, so i will need to wear a t-shirt that is easy to pull up so the artist can have easy access to the spot. What do i do? i thought about wearing a bandage to cover them but i feel like that would d make it obvious
| 11 |
Recovery buddy? I’m looking for friends that are in recovery from self harm. Because I have no friends. None.
| null | 19 |
What is Self-Love?
| null | 2 |
Trauma and Recovery
| null | 4 |
5 years clean today. I can’t believe it
| null | 76 |
I am unable to practice self-love or self-compassion because it drives me to hurt myself. Advice?
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Hello, 25 year old nonbinary person here. This is my first time posting here because I didn't know this place existed until just now, and I could honestly use a bit of advice.
I am not in a good place in terms of my mental health. My biggest issue (out of about 6 or 7 big issues) is my fearful-avoidant attachment style. As a way to try to self-heal until I can afford therapy in a few years, I have been looking into self-compassion.
Unfortunately, it seems to be making things much, much worse than ever before. Almost every time I think about it, I end up having to fight back the urge to hit myself. I don't know exactly what's happening, but I have a loose theory.
I. ***HATE.*** Arrogance. It's so bad that I don't trust myself to be around arrogant people because I'm afraid I might become violent. Now, imagine the kind of things an arrogant person would say:
* I'm good enough!
* I love myself!
* I deserve love and compassion!
* I'm worthy!
* I don't need a relationship because I determine my *own* worth!
* I'm confident, competent, and amazing!
* I don't care what anyone thinks, I'm comfortable with who I am now!
See? The list of arrogance is basically a copy of the list of self-compassion. Now, my little inner self isn't too fond of arrogance, and here's what they say whenever I try to do the self-compassion thing:
* You really think you can just *pretend* to be a good person and that makes it true?
* Everyone says they're worthy of love, even scum and criminals! Doesn't make it true, does it?
* Nobody can determine their own worth. If you hurt someone, you don't get to determine how much it hurts.
* You're pathetic for wanting a relationship. Everyone says you should be happy single! You're selfish and you're also a sheeple who's just crumbling to societal pressure to "get hitched"! It is WRONG to want a relationship, and it is NECESSARY to want to be single forever!
* (while hitting myself) That's what you *fucking* get! That's what you get when you start thinking it's OK to be the shitty person you are now! You don't get to just be *this* broken and say it's okay because you "love yourself". Loving yourself is only making excuses for not getting better!
* You're disgusting! You're selfish and disgusting!
Now, obviously, that isn't something *you* would want to hear, so you can imagine I would like it to stop. However, I just can't. I just can't accept that I have any worth when I'm this broken. "Everyone deserves love"? What a fat load that is. You know who *doesn't* deserve love? People like me who can't trust anyone and can't fix themselves and can't be happy to be single and *are too broken to be worth the effort*.
I just want to be able to do this one thing (self-compassion) so that I can finally be worthy of love. Unless I can do it, I will always be too much of a hassle to love. Unfortunately, if I keep trying, I'm afraid I will end up with a welt the size of my fist.
Any advice? Honestly, I don't blame you if you're stumped. There's just so much wrong with me, and it's not your responsibility to help me. Honestly, just go tell the mods to ban me. I deserve to hurt myself.
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over a month clean, have had no urges but I kind of miss them
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