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POST: My Ex Boyfriend (16) is threatening to leak my (16) nudes if we don't continue our relationship. (CA). For some backstory, we had met off Omegle and it had turned out we lived not too far from each other. We had a relationship going on (which was of slight long distance). After we broke up, he has been threatening to leak my nudes and he's forcing me to continue being in a relationship with him (which I was forced to stay in). I don't want to tell my parents for obvious reasons, however, is there a specific procedure for this sort of thing?
RESPONSE A: Please tell your parents, or an adult you have a great relation and trust. You are going to need support. You cant do this alone. What this guy is doing is illegal. He is blackmailing you, and like others said, he will force you to do other things against your will. You can't live like this. You need to consult the police. Gather as much evidence as you can. Record converstions, text, everything. He leaks those pictures, he is in trouble with the law. He may not do it, but you are not going to wonder if he does it or not. Also, I hope his parents have common sense, and see how f/u their son is once they find out.
RESPONSE B: Besides the child porn, and blackmail already mentioned. Doesn't this potentially qualify as "revenge porn" too?
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: My Ex Boyfriend (16) is threatening to leak my (16) nudes if we don't continue our relationship. (CA). For some backstory, we had met off Omegle and it had turned out we lived not too far from each other. We had a relationship going on (which was of slight long distance). After we broke up, he has been threatening to leak my nudes and he's forcing me to continue being in a relationship with him (which I was forced to stay in). I don't want to tell my parents for obvious reasons, however, is there a specific procedure for this sort of thing?
RESPONSE A: I am not a lawyer but if he leaks those nudes he can get in serious trouble because you are a minor. Realistically he'll get in more trouble than you would because he'd be showing child porn AND revenge porn. Both are illegal (first DEFINITELY is) afaik depending on your state's laws. I have to say this but, don't send nudes to guys. You're giving them ammunition every time you do. I get that you want to send them something nice and feel obligated because they're your boyfriend, but no matter your age, that has the potential to MASSIVELY backfire in your face. Anything you send them could end up online forever.
RESPONSE B: Besides the child porn, and blackmail already mentioned. Doesn't this potentially qualify as "revenge porn" too?
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: previous owner states she has covid and can't move out yet. What can we do? More info in post. Ohio, USA ​ My wife and I closed on Aug 16th on our home, with the stipulation that it would be 30 days before we could move in since the owner was selling the home but didn't have one to move into yet. Signed the contract, exchanged numbers, badda bing badda boom. Halfway through the 30 days we contact her just to get the utilities figured out, like who she used/preferred and whatnot, also asked if she had found a place which she had and was just about to close on it. On the 9th, we figured we werent going to be getting into the house sooner than Sept 16th so that's what we set up all our appointments and deliveries for. The very next day, she calls my wife stating that she has covid and has to quarantine so she may need to be there until about the 20th, stating the moving men can't get her stuff out of the house and into her new condo because of it. ​ My wife and I don't have a home/apartment, we are currently staying in an expensive, absolutely ghetto extended stay because it's the only one that allows pets. She has had a month to get all of this in order, I know you can't help getting sick, but come the 16th that house is OURS. Why do we have to eat even more costs of staying in this extended stay while she would have two homes? What can we do? Do we have legal rights to kick her out? Make her pay for our hotel costs from the 16th to whenever she gets out?
RESPONSE A: Not a lawyer, I would suggest that she pays for your accommodations until the 20th and you charge her rent for the 4 days she remains in the home.
RESPONSE B: Your contract that let her stay for those 30 days almost certainly contains a clause outlining the penalties for holdovers. If you used a real estate attorney for closing, contact them. Otherwise, consider consulting one, especially if you don't think she is actually planning to leave soon.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: a home, now a week before we are to move in the previous owner states she has covid and can't move out yet. What can we do? More info in post. Ohio, USA ​ My wife and I closed on Aug 16th on our home, with the stipulation that it would be 30 days before we could move in since the owner was selling the home but didn't have one to move into yet. Signed the contract, exchanged numbers, badda bing badda boom. Halfway through the 30 days we contact her just to get the utilities figured out, like who she used/preferred and whatnot, also asked if she had found a place which she had and was just about to close on it. On the 9th, we figured we werent going to be getting into the house sooner than Sept 16th so that's what we set up all our appointments and deliveries for. The very next day, she calls my wife stating that she has covid and has to quarantine so she may need to be there until about the 20th, stating the moving men can't get her stuff out of the house and into her new condo because of it. ​ My wife and I don't have a home/apartment, we are currently staying in an expensive, absolutely ghetto extended stay because it's the only one that allows pets. She has had a month to get all of this in order, I know you can't help getting sick, but come the 16th that house is OURS. Why do we have to eat even more costs of staying in this extended stay while she would have two homes? What can we do? Do we have legal rights to kick her out? Make her pay for our hotel costs from the 16th to whenever she gets out?
RESPONSE A: Your contract that let her stay for those 30 days almost certainly contains a clause outlining the penalties for holdovers. If you used a real estate attorney for closing, contact them. Otherwise, consider consulting one, especially if you don't think she is actually planning to leave soon.
RESPONSE B: This may be slightly outside of their normal duties, but have you contacted your title company?
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: week before we are to move in the previous owner states she has covid and can't move out yet. What can we do? More info in post. Ohio, USA ​ My wife and I closed on Aug 16th on our home, with the stipulation that it would be 30 days before we could move in since the owner was selling the home but didn't have one to move into yet. Signed the contract, exchanged numbers, badda bing badda boom. Halfway through the 30 days we contact her just to get the utilities figured out, like who she used/preferred and whatnot, also asked if she had found a place which she had and was just about to close on it. On the 9th, we figured we werent going to be getting into the house sooner than Sept 16th so that's what we set up all our appointments and deliveries for. The very next day, she calls my wife stating that she has covid and has to quarantine so she may need to be there until about the 20th, stating the moving men can't get her stuff out of the house and into her new condo because of it. ​ My wife and I don't have a home/apartment, we are currently staying in an expensive, absolutely ghetto extended stay because it's the only one that allows pets. She has had a month to get all of this in order, I know you can't help getting sick, but come the 16th that house is OURS. Why do we have to eat even more costs of staying in this extended stay while she would have two homes? What can we do? Do we have legal rights to kick her out? Make her pay for our hotel costs from the 16th to whenever she gets out?
RESPONSE A: You need to contact a real estate attorney and fix this asap. Looks like Ohio still has some eviction moratorium in place, and getting this person out could be a bigger issue than you signed up for. Contact your realtor today.
RESPONSE B: Not a lawyer, I would suggest that she pays for your accommodations until the 20th and you charge her rent for the 4 days she remains in the home.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: Wife and I closed on a home, now a week before we are to move in the previous owner states she has covid and can't move out yet. What can we do? More info in post. Ohio, USA ​ My wife and I closed on Aug 16th on our home, with the stipulation that it would be 30 days before we could move in since the owner was selling the home but didn't have one to move into yet. Signed the contract, exchanged numbers, badda bing badda boom. Halfway through the 30 days we contact her just to get the utilities figured out, like who she used/preferred and whatnot, also asked if she had found a place which she had and was just about to close on it. On the 9th, we figured we werent going to be getting into the house sooner than Sept 16th so that's what we set up all our appointments and deliveries for. The very next day, she calls my wife stating that she has covid and has to quarantine so she may need to be there until about the 20th, stating the moving men can't get her stuff out of the house and into her new condo because of it. ​ My wife and I don't have a home/apartment, we are currently staying in an expensive, absolutely ghetto extended stay because it's the only one that allows pets. She has had a month to get all of this in order, I know you can't help getting sick, but come the 16th that house is OURS. Why do we have to eat even more costs of staying in this extended stay while she would have two homes? What can we do? Do we have legal rights to kick her out? Make her pay for our hotel costs from the 16th to whenever she gets out?
RESPONSE A: You need to contact a real estate attorney and fix this asap. Looks like Ohio still has some eviction moratorium in place, and getting this person out could be a bigger issue than you signed up for. Contact your realtor today.
RESPONSE B: This may be slightly outside of their normal duties, but have you contacted your title company?
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: th so that's what we set up all our appointments and deliveries for. The very next day, she calls my wife stating that she has covid and has to quarantine so she may need to be there until about the 20th, stating the moving men can't get her stuff out of the house and into her new condo because of it. ​ My wife and I don't have a home/apartment, we are currently staying in an expensive, absolutely ghetto extended stay because it's the only one that allows pets. She has had a month to get all of this in order, I know you can't help getting sick, but come the 16th that house is OURS. Why do we have to eat even more costs of staying in this extended stay while she would have two homes? What can we do? Do we have legal rights to kick her out? Make her pay for our hotel costs from the 16th to whenever she gets out?
RESPONSE A: You need an amendment to your contract where she agrees to pay you rent for each day she remains in the house and also to compensate you for the hotel expenses you incur as a result. The money will go to you at settlement to be paid from the seller proceeds.
RESPONSE B: I know people have suggested looking at the holdover clause of your sale, but I suggest a different tack. If it's only going to be 4-7 days, consider pointing out the holdover clause, but making an offer to just have her cover your costs. That would make it more likely you can avoid an adversarial showdown, where most outcomes end up with you taking damages that either aren't worth pursuing legally, or end up being long and drawn out. You don't want to create a renter situation in any way, shape, or form if you can avoid it. If she truly does have COVID, no one's going to move her anyway. It's also unlikely a court would grant an eviction in such a short time frame - even if you managed to get in front of a court, a judge would likely give her some grace time. Playing hardball simply has a lot more ways to backfire than to help you.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: [Wisconsin] Previous home owner swapped out washer with a poorly working one after our final walkthrough. As the title states, I have just purchased home. My real-estate agent informed me after the purchase the seller would be taking the washer and replacing with a unit that works. I verbally agreed to this but this was never put into writing. Our buyers agreement states we would be getting the original washer. The original washer was still there during our inspection and final walkthrough. After the final walkthrough, the buyer switched out the unit to one that does not work well at all. It is very old and the agitation is very slow. It wasn't able to get dust off my microfiber cloths. Our real-estate agents have been less responsive since we have closed. I'm not sure what my options are now that we have closed. I feel misled.
RESPONSE A: I’m not a lawyer. It’s my understanding that the entire contract for sale of real property must be in writing, not verbal. You could demand your agent inform the sellers they need to pay for a comparable functioning washer and see what happens.
RESPONSE B: Was the swapped washer actually the original? (And they just saved it to put it back when they moved so they could take the better one tbey purchased.) Since you did a verbal mod, you can see if your contract has a clause saying only written mods are allowed, but since it's *just* a washer, it'll be cheaper to just get a new washer at this point.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: [Wisconsin] Previous home owner swapped out washer with a poorly working one after our final walkthrough. As the title states, I have just purchased home. My real-estate agent informed me after the purchase the seller would be taking the washer and replacing with a unit that works. I verbally agreed to this but this was never put into writing. Our buyers agreement states we would be getting the original washer. The original washer was still there during our inspection and final walkthrough. After the final walkthrough, the buyer switched out the unit to one that does not work well at all. It is very old and the agitation is very slow. It wasn't able to get dust off my microfiber cloths. Our real-estate agents have been less responsive since we have closed. I'm not sure what my options are now that we have closed. I feel misled.
RESPONSE A: I’m not a lawyer. It’s my understanding that the entire contract for sale of real property must be in writing, not verbal. You could demand your agent inform the sellers they need to pay for a comparable functioning washer and see what happens.
RESPONSE B: Talk to your lawyer. While it may not be worth spending money on legal fees, they may be able to get it resolved with a phone call.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: Old landlord threatening to sue for defamation My wife and I just bought a house. Once we paid our old landlord what we owed for repairs (she didn't like that we replaced the white drapes with white drapes) my wife left a review of the units and in her review stated that the landlord was often rude on the phone and we never had a positive interaction with her. Today she calls and threatens to take us to court for defamation of character unless the review gets taken down. Can she do this? Does she have a legal foot to stand on or is she getting laughed out of court?
RESPONSE A: > is she getting laughed out of court It won't even go to court unless she has thousands and thousands of dollars to burn. Ignore her unless you're actually served.
RESPONSE B: Update the review to mention this latest threat and then ignore her. She won't actually sue but IF she does you need to respond and show up. Opinions aren't generally considered to be defamation because (to use your example) everybody's definition of "rude" can be different.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: Old landlord threatening to sue for defamation My wife and I just bought a house. Once we paid our old landlord what we owed for repairs (she didn't like that we replaced the white drapes with white drapes) my wife left a review of the units and in her review stated that the landlord was often rude on the phone and we never had a positive interaction with her. Today she calls and threatens to take us to court for defamation of character unless the review gets taken down. Can she do this? Does she have a legal foot to stand on or is she getting laughed out of court?
RESPONSE A: Update the review to mention this latest threat and then ignore her. She won't actually sue but IF she does you need to respond and show up. Opinions aren't generally considered to be defamation because (to use your example) everybody's definition of "rude" can be different.
RESPONSE B: Ignore until you’re served, but keep that review up and tell her to go fry ice
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: but he never accepted. Waiting for our hearing to come, we received a letter in the mail on February 18, 2015 and enclosed was a check for only half the amount of the security deposit. He wrote in the letter a list of completely bogus damages and costs to repair including $200 to paint the living room and kitchen due to grease and furniture scuffs, and a $100 fee for time and dumping the junk left by the previous tenants. Because he was so far outside the 30 days for returning the deposit and the fact that we had the balls to only give back half, we decided not to cash the check yet and file a subpoena for 1.5 times the deposit ($1,500). Well, apparently he didn't like that and EMAILED us saying: 1) he gave us back the deposit, 2) the amount was fair, 3) if we did not drop the suit, he would sue us for lost potential rents on his side. He said no one wanted to possibly rent the house because of the condition of which it was in; which was exactly the same as when we moved in. He said he would sue for $2000 to cover the potential lost rent. HOWEVER, we know the current tenants through a friend of a friend and they moved into the house in OCTOBER, only one month after we moved out. We feel that we have the strong hand in the lawsuit but I want to be positive that we are going to win and there aren't going to be any negative consequences for us. For obvious reasons, we wish to stay anonymous. Any advice or help is greatly appreciated. I don't want this guy screwing over the next tenants or anyone else.
RESPONSE A: My husband and I sued our former landlord and he also threatened us (and followed through) with a ridiculous countersuit. The judge literally didn't even address his countersuit... everyone there knew he was full of shit. It just made him look like more of an asshole since it was obvious that he was trying to intimidate us into dropping the case.
RESPONSE B: Not a lawyer. Just popping in to say your landlord is a dick eater. I could have a trailer of crap delivered to his residence if you say the word
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: Her husband went inside to get his gun and came back outside. She claims he shot at one of the dogs because they would not leave. She says he shot one in the shoulder first, and then in the head to "put her out of her misery". She says this is when they discovered her bright red collar. They then drug her dead body to the bushes on their property. They preceeded to take their dog to the vet office near by, who then told them to seek care at another vet because the injuries were to severe. They were able to come back to their home, pack, and then drive 3 hours to a vet office close to their actual home. This lady is now wanting me to pay her large vet bill, when I'm not even sure my dog was responsible for the injuries. The lady said she didnt see a collar when her dog was being attacked. The above details were copied from a signed, written statement from the woman. What actions can I take? Do I have a chance at fighting the bills because I'm not sure my dog was responsible for the injuries? Was it legal to shoot my dog after the situation was under control?
RESPONSE A: This person is giving you a statement that not only absolves her of any responsibility or consequences for her actions, but blames you and assigns financial blame to you when you can't prove it. No you absolutely shouldn't take her at face value and consider other actions, including evaluating this with a lawyer. > signed, written statement Signed as in notarized, with legal backing behind it as a sworn statement or anything like that? Or she wrote something herself and just signed it? Because the second one doesn't mean anything except to try to scare you off.
RESPONSE B: > Was it legal to shoot my dog after the situation was under control? This is tricky. Most laws that I have seen allow someone to shoot a canine if it engaging in an attack (such as charging and actually attacking) livestock or household pets. In this case, it appears that the attack was already stopped. As to your other questions, you can deny them any payment and respond to any lawsuit they might bring against you. As to what you can do, unfortunately, I don't have any advice for that.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: legal to shoot my dog after the situation was under control?
RESPONSE A: > Was it legal to shoot my dog after the situation was under control? This is tricky. Most laws that I have seen allow someone to shoot a canine if it engaging in an attack (such as charging and actually attacking) livestock or household pets. In this case, it appears that the attack was already stopped. As to your other questions, you can deny them any payment and respond to any lawsuit they might bring against you. As to what you can do, unfortunately, I don't have any advice for that.
RESPONSE B: I'm sorry, but I find her story plausible. It's very common for dogs that routinely free-roam to form "packs" with other neighborhood dogs, possibly stray or feral. Dogs behave much more aggressively and dangerously in groups. It's highly unlikely that your dog was "pairing up" with coyotes, because the coyotes would have eaten your dog, but that's not what she said; she claims that she mistook this pack of animals for a pack of coyotes. This doesn't matter legally. Your dog was loose, on her property and attacked her dog. She is legally entitled to shoot dangerous and aggressive animals on her property. Almost every judge is going to agree that it was 'legal to shoot [your] dog after the situation was under control" - because your dog was on her property, your dog was clearly vicious because it had attacked her dog. No judge is going to agree that you need to let vicious dogs hang around your house after they attack because they are finished attacking. She does not have to wait and see if it poses any further danger to her, her husband or her dog. You are likely responsible for her veterinary bills, unless perhaps other negligent owners of the dogs who assisted in the attack can be determined, then you could split costs. You should speak to a lawyer. Your options are; 1) come to a reasonable settlement out of court or 2) wait to see if she pursues you for damages and hope that you can reach a reasonable settlement with the judge. You also need to speak with a lawyer regarding possible charges the county or animal control may entertain given that your dog was aggressive and loose.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: Brother's girlfriend pretending to be me while he's in jail. Long story short, my brother is in jail after his girlfriend called the cops. She is the one who is technically pressing charges against him, so the jail won't let them talk on the phone to one another. I found out recently, that she is calling the jail pretending to be me to talk to my brother (she very quickly switches from "I hate you and never want to see you again" to "i love you, please never leave me"). What should I do? What CAN I do? He lost his phone privileges for unrelated reasons, so she can't call him at the moment. But I am still pissed she pretended to be me and risked messing up my brother's case by doing so. She and my brother are in Georgia, I am in Washington state.
RESPONSE A: Let your brother's lawyer know about it. He should be able to get the recordings of those calls, which would help discredit her testimony.
RESPONSE B: Contact the jail and tell them that someone is pretending to be you to gain contact with one of their prisoners. They'll likely prevent further calls as a matter of security if nothing else.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: Brother's girlfriend pretending to be me while he's in jail. Long story short, my brother is in jail after his girlfriend called the cops. She is the one who is technically pressing charges against him, so the jail won't let them talk on the phone to one another. I found out recently, that she is calling the jail pretending to be me to talk to my brother (she very quickly switches from "I hate you and never want to see you again" to "i love you, please never leave me"). What should I do? What CAN I do? He lost his phone privileges for unrelated reasons, so she can't call him at the moment. But I am still pissed she pretended to be me and risked messing up my brother's case by doing so. She and my brother are in Georgia, I am in Washington state.
RESPONSE A: Contact the court with jurisdiction over his case and ask the clerks if he has been assigned a public defender or what he needs to do to get that moving. Tell his lawyer ASAP.
RESPONSE B: What was he arrested for? Also, get these calls recorded. Showing this manipulative or at the very least quickly changing behavior as well as violating a protective order helps discredit her at trial and may cause her to be brought up on charges
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: the impound yard. The police said she had to wait until Monday. She is 18, in high school and the car is titled in my dads name, so today my parents and her went down to the police station to talk with a detective that had been assigned to the case. He said that his backlog is long and he will not be able to look at the case today, and that he would have to get back to them. My sister is adamant that she was not in any sort of accident and that the other party is mistaken about who is responsible, remember this happened in a mall parking lot on a Saturday afternoon full of thousands of cars. She then called the insurance company and they told her that they had a file of the police report. It says that the accusing party say a small white car matching my sisters hit another vehicle as it was driving through the lot. She then saw the car leave the lot, re-enter the lot and drive around to find another spot. she also states that it was a brown haired woman with a ponytail, my sister is blonde and claims to have been wearing a hat with her hair down that day. She needs her car back, and is claiming she in not the guilty party, but they can not get the car back until the police decide to look into the case. What are her options? ​ Thanks, ​ /u/BigNickD
RESPONSE A: I don't think there's much you can do other than to wait until the detective gets to it. If it's longer than a few days, you could obtain an attorney who might be able to \*encourage\* the police to expedite their process.
RESPONSE B: This is crazy. There's no reason to impound a car for something like this, even if she had been the driver in the accident. The Supreme Court of Indiana has had to rule on this issue before. Now, if they hand your car back the next day, it's probably not worth your time to pursue it further, but there's enough evidence of questionable conduct by the police you might want to get a lawyer if they seem to want to hang on to it.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: to head into work. The lady ran off in a hurry, which my sister thought was weird, but she dismissed it. she then came out from her shift and the car was gone. She called around and found out it was at the impound yard. The police said she had to wait until Monday. She is 18, in high school and the car is titled in my dads name, so today my parents and her went down to the police station to talk with a detective that had been assigned to the case. He said that his backlog is long and he will not be able to look at the case today, and that he would have to get back to them. My sister is adamant that she was not in any sort of accident and that the other party is mistaken about who is responsible, remember this happened in a mall parking lot on a Saturday afternoon full of thousands of cars. She then called the insurance company and they told her that they had a file of the police report. It says that the accusing party say a small white car matching my sisters hit another vehicle as it was driving through the lot. She then saw the car leave the lot, re-enter the lot and drive around to find another spot. she also states that it was a brown haired woman with a ponytail, my sister is blonde and claims to have been wearing a hat with her hair down that day. She needs her car back, and is claiming she in not the guilty party, but they can not get the car back until the police decide to look into the case. What are her options? ​ Thanks, ​ /u/BigNickD
RESPONSE A: This is crazy. There's no reason to impound a car for something like this, even if she had been the driver in the accident. The Supreme Court of Indiana has had to rule on this issue before. Now, if they hand your car back the next day, it's probably not worth your time to pursue it further, but there's enough evidence of questionable conduct by the police you might want to get a lawyer if they seem to want to hang on to it.
RESPONSE B: Have you been to the impound lot to get the car out?
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: into work. The lady ran off in a hurry, which my sister thought was weird, but she dismissed it. she then came out from her shift and the car was gone. She called around and found out it was at the impound yard. The police said she had to wait until Monday. She is 18, in high school and the car is titled in my dads name, so today my parents and her went down to the police station to talk with a detective that had been assigned to the case. He said that his backlog is long and he will not be able to look at the case today, and that he would have to get back to them. My sister is adamant that she was not in any sort of accident and that the other party is mistaken about who is responsible, remember this happened in a mall parking lot on a Saturday afternoon full of thousands of cars. She then called the insurance company and they told her that they had a file of the police report. It says that the accusing party say a small white car matching my sisters hit another vehicle as it was driving through the lot. She then saw the car leave the lot, re-enter the lot and drive around to find another spot. she also states that it was a brown haired woman with a ponytail, my sister is blonde and claims to have been wearing a hat with her hair down that day. She needs her car back, and is claiming she in not the guilty party, but they can not get the car back until the police decide to look into the case. What are her options? ​ Thanks, ​ /u/BigNickD
RESPONSE A: Be aware the impound lot may be assessing a storage fee plus towing fee for holding onto the car. Do not let the police or the impound lot get away with costing you guys more money. You may need a lawyer to help correct this if they do.
RESPONSE B: I don't think there's much you can do other than to wait until the detective gets to it. If it's longer than a few days, you could obtain an attorney who might be able to \*encourage\* the police to expedite their process.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: My ex girlfriend was killed in a car accident.WA] Her sister messaged me [NY] and told me that we have a son together. Not sure what to do about this. Just in case I didn't make it clear, my alleged son lives in Washington. I am in NY. Obviously I still need to confirm that he is mine. I'm not sure if it makes a difference if I consult a lawyer before asking for a pat test or if it would be okay if I just asked his aunt to help me with one. Is there any reason why I can't do this without the supervision of an attorney? If he is my son, I do think that I would like custody full time. I'm not sure if I would have to do anything. I am not listed on his birth certificate, according to the aunt, so I am not sure how that affects things. As far as I know, there is no guardianship set up or anything, at least his aunt didn't mention it. She implied that the only one involved was his mother. Would I still need to go to court to protect myself in case his grandparents or aunt wanted to claim him? From what she tells me that seems unlikely. They are not in a position to raise him. Finally, is it better to consult with a Washington attorney or a NY attorney? In case there's anything I left out, here is my [original post. Thanks!
RESPONSE A: I'd get a lawyer so that you can arrange for a proper paternity test. If he's yours, take the paternity test to the court and let them know you want full custody. Are you ready, willing, and able to have him home with you now? Can you afford him financially? Who will care for him while you're at work? Do you know what to feed a child?
RESPONSE B: > As far as I know, there is no guardianship set up or anything Who currently has legal custody of the child? And how old is the child? Regardless, yes, you do need an attorney. But there are many, many other factors here. The kid is 3000 miles away, has never met you, and has some sort of support there, correct?
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POST: time he’s gotten physical with me and it’s been suggested to me before to file a police report but I’m afraid of opening a can of worms that I don’t know if I’m ready to deal with. I don’t have any actual proof. He’s only ever left small bruises and not often and I didn’t think to take photos at the time. He’s threatened multiple times to keep our 2 year old son from me if I leave, saying things like “go, we’ll be fine without you” or “do you know how easy it would be for me to disappear with him” and has tried to physically wrestle him from my arms on more than one occasion. I just want an idea of what the process will be like if I report him just to get it all on record. I don’t know if I’m ready to leave yet. I don’t even know what being ready would look like. I’m sorry if this isn’t the right place for this. Thank you in advance.
RESPONSE A: This situation is above this sub's pay grade. You may want to document these interactions, but be aware, it is definitely a crime to deprive or otherwise obstruct someone's access to a telephone (especially their own mobile phone) during a DV or other criminal altercation. I can't know what all the details are, I'm just pointing this out because of how you taking his phone and scuffling over it could be spun against you by a halfway decent attorney. It's best to not touch any phone other than your own in a situation such as this unless you're calling 9-1-1. There are plenty of resources available for recognizing and mending or leaving unhealthy relationships. If your arguments & fights are not completely one-sided, you both should consider anger management counseling to avoid escalation, but obviously you can only work on your side of this issue and must make the decision to remove yourself from that situation if it does not improve.
RESPONSE B: National Domestic Violence Hotline 800-799-7233 They can do all sorts of things, including provide a referral to a lawyer and help you plan to get out safely.
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POST: have any actual proof. He’s only ever left small bruises and not often and I didn’t think to take photos at the time. He’s threatened multiple times to keep our 2 year old son from me if I leave, saying things like “go, we’ll be fine without you” or “do you know how easy it would be for me to disappear with him” and has tried to physically wrestle him from my arms on more than one occasion. I just want an idea of what the process will be like if I report him just to get it all on record. I don’t know if I’m ready to leave yet. I don’t even know what being ready would look like. I’m sorry if this isn’t the right place for this. Thank you in advance.
RESPONSE A: This situation is above this sub's pay grade. You may want to document these interactions, but be aware, it is definitely a crime to deprive or otherwise obstruct someone's access to a telephone (especially their own mobile phone) during a DV or other criminal altercation. I can't know what all the details are, I'm just pointing this out because of how you taking his phone and scuffling over it could be spun against you by a halfway decent attorney. It's best to not touch any phone other than your own in a situation such as this unless you're calling 9-1-1. There are plenty of resources available for recognizing and mending or leaving unhealthy relationships. If your arguments & fights are not completely one-sided, you both should consider anger management counseling to avoid escalation, but obviously you can only work on your side of this issue and must make the decision to remove yourself from that situation if it does not improve.
RESPONSE B: “I’m afraid to open a can of worms that I don’t know if I’m ready to deal with” uh.. lady….. that can has been open for a while. He threw hands on you and apparently it’s not even the first time. This will keep happening and may even escalate. You need to act now, for your own safety. File the report and find somewhere safe to stay.
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POST: of opening a can of worms that I don’t know if I’m ready to deal with. I don’t have any actual proof. He’s only ever left small bruises and not often and I didn’t think to take photos at the time. He’s threatened multiple times to keep our 2 year old son from me if I leave, saying things like “go, we’ll be fine without you” or “do you know how easy it would be for me to disappear with him” and has tried to physically wrestle him from my arms on more than one occasion. I just want an idea of what the process will be like if I report him just to get it all on record. I don’t know if I’m ready to leave yet. I don’t even know what being ready would look like. I’m sorry if this isn’t the right place for this. Thank you in advance.
RESPONSE A: This situation is above this sub's pay grade. You may want to document these interactions, but be aware, it is definitely a crime to deprive or otherwise obstruct someone's access to a telephone (especially their own mobile phone) during a DV or other criminal altercation. I can't know what all the details are, I'm just pointing this out because of how you taking his phone and scuffling over it could be spun against you by a halfway decent attorney. It's best to not touch any phone other than your own in a situation such as this unless you're calling 9-1-1. There are plenty of resources available for recognizing and mending or leaving unhealthy relationships. If your arguments & fights are not completely one-sided, you both should consider anger management counseling to avoid escalation, but obviously you can only work on your side of this issue and must make the decision to remove yourself from that situation if it does not improve.
RESPONSE B: Please find a safe place. As it's been pointed out you could face some ramifications for not giving his phone back. You cannot take some one's property and expect they won't try to retrieve it. Use of force to retrieve one's property isn't usually seen as unlawful.
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POST: had gotten up, fell and died. - The cause of death is still pending. The funeral director claimed he fractured his neck when he fell, but that doesn’t explain why he felt the need to get up in the middle of the night. Do we have a case against the hospital? Is this worth exploring with a lawyer?
RESPONSE A: Some things I know is the machine that records vital signs also shows when it was taken. Now a person could lie and chart without taking vital signs but that machine would of recorded it.Also another thing that could of happen is the person took vitals wrote it down and then charted it at a later time, which is normal because it can get busy and you chart when you have time. Bed alarm active means it should of been turned on, but machine may have been faulty and the bed alarm did not work. Also the nursing staff you talked to were most likely the next round of staff so they can only inform you on what they see on the chart. Also the Apple Watch cannot measure bpm lower then 30 or heart rhythm that indicates heart attack. So the data cannot indicate that the heart stopped at that point. Also if he truly has his heart stopped at 2:45 then and Code blue was initiated after 4 there would still be no heart activity that can be revived at that point. Unless he was coding a little before that.What does the watch say about his fall detection. If you want go through a medical malpractice you need to get a lawyer involved and do a autopsy of your dad and you can order for the complete medical record of your father.
RESPONSE B: I was a medical malpractice paralegal for many years. An autopsy is vital in wrongful death cases. If he died from a head injury, you may have a case. However if he had a sudden cardiac death that wasn’t preventable, then there is likely no case. Everything has to be connected- the hospital’s negligence must cause or contribute to cause the death and the burden of proof is on the plaintiff. That’s why an autopsy is so important. It sounds like you’re waiting for a cause of death and once you get that, you may want to consult with a medical malpractice lawyer.
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POST: was scheduled to have spinal surgery the morning he died. A month before he had an extensive spinal fusion. This last surgery was supposed to stabilize the tail bone. Key facts: - He couldn’t hardly walk. He was getting around by wheelchair. He did have his walker with him in the hospital. - They found him around 6 feet or so from his bed seemingly heading towards the door or the sink located towards the door and initiated crash cart procedures shortly after 4 am. - When we got to the hospital the nursing staff claimed they checked his vitals at 3:19 am. - My dad had an apple wrist watch that transmitted his heart rate data to his phone. This data indicated his heart stopped suddenly at 2:45 am. Clearly the nursing staff lied about seeing him at 3:19 am. - The watch has heart rate data going back months and months. He almost never took it off. Additionally, the data shows some heart activity where they were doing cpr on him shortly after 4 am. - Dad was a fall risk. On his board the bed alert was checked as active. Yet nobody found him for about a hour and twenty minutes after he had gotten up, fell and died. - The cause of death is still pending. The funeral director claimed he fractured his neck when he fell, but that doesn’t explain why he felt the need to get up in the middle of the night. Do we have a case against the hospital? Is this worth exploring with a lawyer?
RESPONSE A: It can be investigated if they truly took vitals at the time they said. Some hospitals use vitals machines that send vitals straight to the documentation system, without their being an option to edit the time. If vitals were never entered into the computer it's a red flag
RESPONSE B: Keep in mind that even if the hospital was definitely negligent and that negligence killed your dad, you’ll have to prove damages. That’s going to be difficult with someone who was already having serious health issues, because he may not have lived long even without the negligence. For that reason it may be difficult to find someone to take the case. But you can go for a consultation if it will put your mind at ease. I’m sorry for your loss.
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POST: they checked his vitals at 3:19 am. - My dad had an apple wrist watch that transmitted his heart rate data to his phone. This data indicated his heart stopped suddenly at 2:45 am. Clearly the nursing staff lied about seeing him at 3:19 am. - The watch has heart rate data going back months and months. He almost never took it off. Additionally, the data shows some heart activity where they were doing cpr on him shortly after 4 am. - Dad was a fall risk. On his board the bed alert was checked as active. Yet nobody found him for about a hour and twenty minutes after he had gotten up, fell and died. - The cause of death is still pending. The funeral director claimed he fractured his neck when he fell, but that doesn’t explain why he felt the need to get up in the middle of the night. Do we have a case against the hospital? Is this worth exploring with a lawyer?
RESPONSE A: Keep in mind that even if the hospital was definitely negligent and that negligence killed your dad, you’ll have to prove damages. That’s going to be difficult with someone who was already having serious health issues, because he may not have lived long even without the negligence. For that reason it may be difficult to find someone to take the case. But you can go for a consultation if it will put your mind at ease. I’m sorry for your loss.
RESPONSE B: I'm really sorry for your loss. Definitely speak to an attorney to set your mind at ease but there's not likely to be neglect. If your dad had an apple watch he wore I'm assuming he was with it? Patients have the right to fall. I know that sounds stupid but it's a fact. He may have declined a bed alarm. He would of had that right. And it sounds like it was less than 2 hours between rounds which is pretty standard care at night. He wasn't post surgical so more frequent rounds wouldn't be necessary. And then we still go back to having the right to fall. Unless there was a documented history of falls from his stay the usual fall education that should of been and documented likely covers a fall on a with it patient.
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POST: with his spine. He was scheduled to have spinal surgery the morning he died. A month before he had an extensive spinal fusion. This last surgery was supposed to stabilize the tail bone. Key facts: - He couldn’t hardly walk. He was getting around by wheelchair. He did have his walker with him in the hospital. - They found him around 6 feet or so from his bed seemingly heading towards the door or the sink located towards the door and initiated crash cart procedures shortly after 4 am. - When we got to the hospital the nursing staff claimed they checked his vitals at 3:19 am. - My dad had an apple wrist watch that transmitted his heart rate data to his phone. This data indicated his heart stopped suddenly at 2:45 am. Clearly the nursing staff lied about seeing him at 3:19 am. - The watch has heart rate data going back months and months. He almost never took it off. Additionally, the data shows some heart activity where they were doing cpr on him shortly after 4 am. - Dad was a fall risk. On his board the bed alert was checked as active. Yet nobody found him for about a hour and twenty minutes after he had gotten up, fell and died. - The cause of death is still pending. The funeral director claimed he fractured his neck when he fell, but that doesn’t explain why he felt the need to get up in the middle of the night. Do we have a case against the hospital? Is this worth exploring with a lawyer?
RESPONSE A: Could be a Deep vein thrombosis and pulmonary artery embolus. Common in bedridden patients, fatal in 25% of cases. The postmortem should help. I would await the results and then decide if you want to seek counsel
RESPONSE B: Keep in mind that even if the hospital was definitely negligent and that negligence killed your dad, you’ll have to prove damages. That’s going to be difficult with someone who was already having serious health issues, because he may not have lived long even without the negligence. For that reason it may be difficult to find someone to take the case. But you can go for a consultation if it will put your mind at ease. I’m sorry for your loss.
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POST: Please help. My mom just died a few minutes ago. I will be the one planning the funeral. My dad died when I was 7, so I don't remember much. I basically know my moms wishes, but I need to know any helpful information on making arrangements, or whatever else there is to know.
RESPONSE A: For now, take some time to grieve. As callous as it may sound, she's not going anywhere anytime soon. You don't need to worry about all that right now. I assume she will be taken to the hospital (or wherever your local morgue is). Talk to someone there. They deal with this often and can get you pointed in the right direction to get some resources to help you navigate this. If she went to church, contact them. They can provide some guidance. The important thing now is to grieve and process. The rest will come in it's own time.
RESPONSE B: This really isn’t a legal question (although I’m so sorry for your loss) In your place I’d google “how to arrange a funeral in state” with state being your state.
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POST: Please help. My mom just died a few minutes ago. I will be the one planning the funeral. My dad died when I was 7, so I don't remember much. I basically know my moms wishes, but I need to know any helpful information on making arrangements, or whatever else there is to know.
RESPONSE A: Sorry for your loss. I contacted a funeral home and asked them for guidance. They did a lot of stuff and advised on a lot of stuff. Booking the facility and arranging the service etc. I would ask a funeral home about the whole process and about prices for everything. Then call two more and repeat. Take lots of notes. Is there a Will and an executor? You may become the executor. For me, the funeral home issued "proof of death" letters (at a cost) for us which were like "low-strength" death certificates but satisfactory for some of what we had to do. They arranged for Death Certificates (at a cost) which were the official documents and acceptable by big banks in dealing with the Will and the estate.
RESPONSE B: First, I am sorry for your loss. Second: bring someone, preferably *not* from your immediate family, with you when you go to a funeral home. The folks there will pressure you to buy every conceivable "upgrade" to run the bill up: longer viewing time, nicer casket, more flowers, etc. Think long and hard about whether you can afford it, and whether you should do it or not. I would argue that most of it is superfluous and overpriced. They know that you are in a vulnerable state of mind and will agree to just about everything as long as it's presented as "honoring the deceased person." So if you have someone with you, esp. if it's a hard-nosed person, s/he can act as the voice of reason. I went through all this when I lost my dad a few years ago. Those guys at the funeral home can sell freezers to Eskimos.
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POST: Please help. My mom just died a few minutes ago. I will be the one planning the funeral. My dad died when I was 7, so I don't remember much. I basically know my moms wishes, but I need to know any helpful information on making arrangements, or whatever else there is to know.
RESPONSE A: This really isn’t a legal question (although I’m so sorry for your loss) In your place I’d google “how to arrange a funeral in state” with state being your state.
RESPONSE B: First, I am sorry for your loss. Second: bring someone, preferably *not* from your immediate family, with you when you go to a funeral home. The folks there will pressure you to buy every conceivable "upgrade" to run the bill up: longer viewing time, nicer casket, more flowers, etc. Think long and hard about whether you can afford it, and whether you should do it or not. I would argue that most of it is superfluous and overpriced. They know that you are in a vulnerable state of mind and will agree to just about everything as long as it's presented as "honoring the deceased person." So if you have someone with you, esp. if it's a hard-nosed person, s/he can act as the voice of reason. I went through all this when I lost my dad a few years ago. Those guys at the funeral home can sell freezers to Eskimos.
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POST: Please help. My mom just died a few minutes ago. I will be the one planning the funeral. My dad died when I was 7, so I don't remember much. I basically know my moms wishes, but I need to know any helpful information on making arrangements, or whatever else there is to know.
RESPONSE A: This really isn’t a legal question (although I’m so sorry for your loss) In your place I’d google “how to arrange a funeral in state” with state being your state.
RESPONSE B: Talk to some friends or family members and see if they can recommend a funeral home. Even if it’s just “hey where did your mom go when your grandma died five years ago?”, it could remove some of the stress of just googling a place. The funeral home staff can actually guide you through just about everything. They’re literally the experts and have experience dealing with grieving family members, various religious rites, and can handhold you through the entire thing. They can recommend vendors for whatever you may need (or, if you’re at your wits end, they’ll just make decisions and book them for you. Seriously, handholding!), and they can likely recommend folks to take care of financial and legal stuff as well. (Not a lawyer, and I hope my experience with just the one funeral home a couple of times is actually representative of most and I wasn’t just lucky)
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POST: My mom died and had set up a trust. The attorney is telling me the house she left will need to be sold. Can this be explained to me and what can I do? My dad (he died 5 years ago) and mom had a horrible and lengthy battle with cancer. I spent the last few months with my mother caring for her under FMLA. I have a brother who just turned 18. My mom told me the house would be mine so that my daughter could experience living in a stable home in Ohio. We had many talks about it. My mother ended up passing on November 16th. In the will, it listed her sister and law as a trustee for a trust. This trust was to keep assets (and listed the house) in a trust for my brother and I until he turned 25, when it would be split. The trustee is listed as having power to do basically anything with the assets. Today my aunt had a meeting with the attorney, which I requested to go to but was not allowed, and afterwards I get a call where she tells me that the house will need to be sold. This is my brother and I’s childhood home and in no way did my mother want this. Can anyone explain why this could be happening and if there is anything at all that can be done?
RESPONSE A: You should probably consult with an attorney. There are too many unknowns to get a decent answer here. Even if the house was paid off, there are ongoing expenses (such as property taxes) that would need to be paid from the trust. If the trust runs out of money, the house will need to be sold.
RESPONSE B: First of all, ask your aunt why she selling it? Second of all if you don't like that answer get your own attorney
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POST: that can be done?
RESPONSE A: ---
> http://imgur.com/a/myIAb
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Author: /u/Trust_noxone
Title: **My mom died and had set up a trust. The attorney is telling me the house she left will need to be sold. Can this be explained to me and what can I do?**
Original Post:
> My dad and mom had a horrible and lengthy battle with cancer. I spent the last few months with my mother caring for her under FMLA. I have a brother who just turned 18. My mom told me the house would be mine so that my daughter could experience living in a stable home. We had many talks about it. My mother ended up passing on November 16th. In the will, it listed her sister and law as a trustee for a trust. This trust was to keep assets (and listed the house) in a trust for my brother and I until he turned 25, when it would be split. The trustee is listed as having power to do basically anything with the assets. Today my aunt had a meeting with the attorney, which I requested to go to but was not allowed, and afterwards I get a call where she tells me that the house will need to be sold. This is my brother and I’s childhood home and in no way did my mother want this. Can anyone explain why this could be happening and if there is anything at all that can be done?
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RESPONSE B: You should probably consult with an attorney. There are too many unknowns to get a decent answer here. Even if the house was paid off, there are ongoing expenses (such as property taxes) that would need to be paid from the trust. If the trust runs out of money, the house will need to be sold.
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POST: My mom died and had set up a trust. The attorney is telling me the house she left will need to be sold. Can this be explained to me and what can I do? My dad (he died 5 years ago) and mom had a horrible and lengthy battle with cancer. I spent the last few months with my mother caring for her under FMLA. I have a brother who just turned 18. My mom told me the house would be mine so that my daughter could experience living in a stable home in Ohio. We had many talks about it. My mother ended up passing on November 16th. In the will, it listed her sister and law as a trustee for a trust. This trust was to keep assets (and listed the house) in a trust for my brother and I until he turned 25, when it would be split. The trustee is listed as having power to do basically anything with the assets. Today my aunt had a meeting with the attorney, which I requested to go to but was not allowed, and afterwards I get a call where she tells me that the house will need to be sold. This is my brother and I’s childhood home and in no way did my mother want this. Can anyone explain why this could be happening and if there is anything at all that can be done?
RESPONSE A: First, I am truly sorry to hear of your mother's recent passing. Is it possible that your mother carried debt when she passed such that estate assets would need to be sold in order to satisfy those debts?
RESPONSE B: First of all, ask your aunt why she selling it? Second of all if you don't like that answer get your own attorney
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POST: did my mother want this. Can anyone explain why this could be happening and if there is anything at all that can be done?
RESPONSE A: ---
> http://imgur.com/a/myIAb
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Author: /u/Trust_noxone
Title: **My mom died and had set up a trust. The attorney is telling me the house she left will need to be sold. Can this be explained to me and what can I do?**
Original Post:
> My dad and mom had a horrible and lengthy battle with cancer. I spent the last few months with my mother caring for her under FMLA. I have a brother who just turned 18. My mom told me the house would be mine so that my daughter could experience living in a stable home. We had many talks about it. My mother ended up passing on November 16th. In the will, it listed her sister and law as a trustee for a trust. This trust was to keep assets (and listed the house) in a trust for my brother and I until he turned 25, when it would be split. The trustee is listed as having power to do basically anything with the assets. Today my aunt had a meeting with the attorney, which I requested to go to but was not allowed, and afterwards I get a call where she tells me that the house will need to be sold. This is my brother and I’s childhood home and in no way did my mother want this. Can anyone explain why this could be happening and if there is anything at all that can be done?
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RESPONSE B: First, I am truly sorry to hear of your mother's recent passing. Is it possible that your mother carried debt when she passed such that estate assets would need to be sold in order to satisfy those debts?
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POST: My mom died and had set up a trust. The attorney is telling me the house she left will need to be sold. Can this be explained to me and what can I do? My dad (he died 5 years ago) and mom had a horrible and lengthy battle with cancer. I spent the last few months with my mother caring for her under FMLA. I have a brother who just turned 18. My mom told me the house would be mine so that my daughter could experience living in a stable home in Ohio. We had many talks about it. My mother ended up passing on November 16th. In the will, it listed her sister and law as a trustee for a trust. This trust was to keep assets (and listed the house) in a trust for my brother and I until he turned 25, when it would be split. The trustee is listed as having power to do basically anything with the assets. Today my aunt had a meeting with the attorney, which I requested to go to but was not allowed, and afterwards I get a call where she tells me that the house will need to be sold. This is my brother and I’s childhood home and in no way did my mother want this. Can anyone explain why this could be happening and if there is anything at all that can be done?
RESPONSE A: First of all, ask your aunt why she selling it? Second of all if you don't like that answer get your own attorney
RESPONSE B: When was the trust created? If it was set up after her terminal diagnosis as a way to shield assets from her creditors (namely the hospital where she received treatment), it's likely that the trust can be unwound based on fraudulent conveyance.
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POST: My mom had $700 dollars in her account when she died... As the title reads, my mom had $700 dollars in her bank account at the time of her death, but she owes thousands to at least 13 creditors including over $1000 to Chase after they repossessed her car when she passed and sold it at auction. Her personal effects were of little to no value (most were donated to Goodwill) and she was on renters assistance when she had to go into hospice care. I have been contacted by one creditor offering to "help settle" her estate in terms of the money she owes them... but with only $700... and the thousands she owes, it seems ridiculous to send all of that remaining money to one of them - or even to break it up and send $53.84 to all 13 of the creditors leaving me with nothing to help cover the after-death expenses (cremation and whatnot). So... can I just blow these people (companies) off and not respond? Will they be able to find out about the $700 bucks and come after me? I am *not* a co-signer on any of her accounts, there was no Will and as her estate is so meager, there won't be any sort of probate. I am the sole surviving heir. Thanks in advance for your guidance.
RESPONSE A: DO NOT AGREE TO PAY ANYTHING. These are not your debts. Once you get into discussions about paying off debts you may be on the hook.
RESPONSE B: Attorney here. Not your attorney. You need to file a probate application with the court. During probate the executor will have to gather all the assets and all creditors will be notified of the value of the estate. Once they realize there is no money to be had, they probably won't pursue it. When my dad passed we did an affidavit of his estate's value and every creditor moved on, and he owned a lot with a trailer and 3 cars.
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POST: Dad passed away, apparently he owns land but it looks like homes are built on it although my mom still has to pay the taxes. I'm not sure where to post this or what to do, so please redirect me if this is the wrong subreddit. My dad passed away in August. He and my mother purchased land in PA sometime in the 1970s. We live in AZ. The land had nothing built on it at the time. My mom never handled the finances, so she forgot about the land completely until she got a tax form this year to pay the taxes on the land. There was also a letter from someone else (I dont have it in front of me) offering to buy the land for $4000. Curious, I looked up the address on Google, and it looks like homes are built on the land. How can homes be built on my mom's land if she's still paying the taxes and hasn't sold it? I don't know how to help her or where to start. Thanks for any responses.
RESPONSE A: Who is probating your father's estate?
RESPONSE B: Adverse Possession is a possibility. You may want to confirm what is owned and what is supposed to be on the land. Find out how to get a copy of all building permits for the land. You need more info and you need to act sooner rather than later. You might need to travel to see the land as well.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: Dad passed away, apparently he owns land but it looks like homes are built on it although my mom still has to pay the taxes. I'm not sure where to post this or what to do, so please redirect me if this is the wrong subreddit. My dad passed away in August. He and my mother purchased land in PA sometime in the 1970s. We live in AZ. The land had nothing built on it at the time. My mom never handled the finances, so she forgot about the land completely until she got a tax form this year to pay the taxes on the land. There was also a letter from someone else (I dont have it in front of me) offering to buy the land for $4000. Curious, I looked up the address on Google, and it looks like homes are built on the land. How can homes be built on my mom's land if she's still paying the taxes and hasn't sold it? I don't know how to help her or where to start. Thanks for any responses.
RESPONSE A: Who is probating your father's estate?
RESPONSE B: Not a lawyer. Are you able to look at your mom's tax bill and see what the assessed value is? There should be separate values for the land and for any buildings on it, and then the total of both. In her case, the there should only be an assessment for land with a 0 value for buildings. This will at least let you know immediately if she has been paying for anything she didn’t put up. Also, if it is just assessed for land, that should tell you the local government didn’t authorize the building of any permanent structures. But you'll still have to confirm whether any were actually put up. Google maps is not necessarily absolute for that.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: Dad passed away, apparently he owns land but it looks like homes are built on it although my mom still has to pay the taxes. I'm not sure where to post this or what to do, so please redirect me if this is the wrong subreddit. My dad passed away in August. He and my mother purchased land in PA sometime in the 1970s. We live in AZ. The land had nothing built on it at the time. My mom never handled the finances, so she forgot about the land completely until she got a tax form this year to pay the taxes on the land. There was also a letter from someone else (I dont have it in front of me) offering to buy the land for $4000. Curious, I looked up the address on Google, and it looks like homes are built on the land. How can homes be built on my mom's land if she's still paying the taxes and hasn't sold it? I don't know how to help her or where to start. Thanks for any responses.
RESPONSE A: Does the property actually have a street address or just a parcel number? You'd want to reference the county GIS with aerial images as the basemap as Google Maps may be showing you a property to either side of the actual property. While it's got better in recent years, it's still not unusual for rural properties to have addresses mismapped.
RESPONSE B: I just had another thought, this one in regards to the purchase offer your mother received. There is a lot of drilling for natural gas going on/getting started in PA and companies are trying to buy up people's mineral rights. That’s more likely to be what that $4000 was for, than for the land itself. I have no clue if that’s a good offer or not, though.
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POST: wearing had been cut to pieces with scissors, and I had a LOT of clothes. They (The drunk and the 25 year old I assume) cut the cord to my TV, my bluray, my record player, broke my records, stole my massive DVD collection, stabbed my mattress excessively, cut my PILLOWS in half, and even sunk so low as to take pictures of family and of me performing in bands through the years, and CUT MY FACE OUT OF EACH ONE. They stole my vintage keyboard, a basketball, my newest pair of shoes, and I'm probably forgetting plenty of other things. I made an inventory of everything missing or destroyed I could remember and added the estimated value, which came out to $2,075...And that was a very low estimate. I rounded down...So basically, I'm devastated and have no idea what to do. My case manager helped me get into a 30-day stay transitional house run by the county, so for now I'm avoiding the local homeless shelter, but after my time's up at this house I don't know what will happen to me. I need legal aid. I have no idea where to start, other than making several police calls which didn't prove to be very useful. I have a case number, but I'm not sure what to do with it. The only evidence I have is the video my case manager took of the lady acting psychotic, my case manager's testimony, and pictures I took of my destroyed clothes and electronics. Sorry for the essay, but I want anyone with advice to have all the info.
RESPONSE A: Your property was stolen/vandalized. Definitely make police reports, give them copies of your evidence, and follow up with the police.
RESPONSE B: Please review the Landlord Tenant Questions section of the /r/LegalAdvice Wiki for common questions and answers regarding landlord tenant issues. If this does not apply to your question, please disregard *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/legaladvice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: estimate. I rounded down...So basically, I'm devastated and have no idea what to do. My case manager helped me get into a 30-day stay transitional house run by the county, so for now I'm avoiding the local homeless shelter, but after my time's up at this house I don't know what will happen to me. I need legal aid. I have no idea where to start, other than making several police calls which didn't prove to be very useful. I have a case number, but I'm not sure what to do with it. The only evidence I have is the video my case manager took of the lady acting psychotic, my case manager's testimony, and pictures I took of my destroyed clothes and electronics. Sorry for the essay, but I want anyone with advice to have all the info.
RESPONSE A: Please review the Landlord Tenant Questions section of the /r/LegalAdvice Wiki for common questions and answers regarding landlord tenant issues. If this does not apply to your question, please disregard *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/legaladvice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
RESPONSE B: Hold on to and back up that recording you took. Take pictures of everything destroyed, look up prices of all your destroyed, vandalized and stolen objects. Add that number as the total damages and also see about getting a restraining order on the woman. Also, I would explain that you told the landlord multiple times that she was using drugs and copy all written proof you have saying this. It will show that she has been mental, drug abusing for a while which will help your side a lot. Get a written statement from the woman who came in with you last time about her behavior. You have more than enough proof it was her. Talk to a lawyer and sue for damages and see about adding emotional distress as well. You said you were an ex-addict, proud of you to have beaten it, but now you have this crazy lady who is illegally surrounding you with that old environment. That can't be good for your mental health.
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POST: completely destroyed. EVERY item of clothing I own besides the clothes I was wearing had been cut to pieces with scissors, and I had a LOT of clothes. They (The drunk and the 25 year old I assume) cut the cord to my TV, my bluray, my record player, broke my records, stole my massive DVD collection, stabbed my mattress excessively, cut my PILLOWS in half, and even sunk so low as to take pictures of family and of me performing in bands through the years, and CUT MY FACE OUT OF EACH ONE. They stole my vintage keyboard, a basketball, my newest pair of shoes, and I'm probably forgetting plenty of other things. I made an inventory of everything missing or destroyed I could remember and added the estimated value, which came out to $2,075...And that was a very low estimate. I rounded down...So basically, I'm devastated and have no idea what to do. My case manager helped me get into a 30-day stay transitional house run by the county, so for now I'm avoiding the local homeless shelter, but after my time's up at this house I don't know what will happen to me. I need legal aid. I have no idea where to start, other than making several police calls which didn't prove to be very useful. I have a case number, but I'm not sure what to do with it. The only evidence I have is the video my case manager took of the lady acting psychotic, my case manager's testimony, and pictures I took of my destroyed clothes and electronics. Sorry for the essay, but I want anyone with advice to have all the info.
RESPONSE A: Please review the Landlord Tenant Questions section of the /r/LegalAdvice Wiki for common questions and answers regarding landlord tenant issues. If this does not apply to your question, please disregard *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/legaladvice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
RESPONSE B: Do you have renter's insurance? If so, contact them.
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POST: collection, stabbed my mattress excessively, cut my PILLOWS in half, and even sunk so low as to take pictures of family and of me performing in bands through the years, and CUT MY FACE OUT OF EACH ONE. They stole my vintage keyboard, a basketball, my newest pair of shoes, and I'm probably forgetting plenty of other things. I made an inventory of everything missing or destroyed I could remember and added the estimated value, which came out to $2,075...And that was a very low estimate. I rounded down...So basically, I'm devastated and have no idea what to do. My case manager helped me get into a 30-day stay transitional house run by the county, so for now I'm avoiding the local homeless shelter, but after my time's up at this house I don't know what will happen to me. I need legal aid. I have no idea where to start, other than making several police calls which didn't prove to be very useful. I have a case number, but I'm not sure what to do with it. The only evidence I have is the video my case manager took of the lady acting psychotic, my case manager's testimony, and pictures I took of my destroyed clothes and electronics. Sorry for the essay, but I want anyone with advice to have all the info.
RESPONSE A: Call the police for theft and vandalism. And if they happen to come across some drugs, all the better. I'd also go back there and lock up your room and remove all valuables from the property and ask a friend if you can store them at their place. Then check your lease terms for rules on subletting and start looking for a subletter so you can move out.
RESPONSE B: Please review the Landlord Tenant Questions section of the /r/LegalAdvice Wiki for common questions and answers regarding landlord tenant issues. If this does not apply to your question, please disregard *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/legaladvice) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: My dad is letting high school students from the school across the street pay to park in our driveway... what issues could we see with that? I used to go to this school (graduated now) and we let my friends park there for free. Word got around and people who weren't eligible for a school pass came to us and offered to pay. Last year we kept 10 cars a day in the driveway and made good money off of it. Students started taking advantage of it and parked without paying, so we're currently trying to come up with a solution by implementing parking passes. Before we put in the overhead, is this a horrible idea leaving us open to a ton of liability? During the day, nobody is home because I'm away at college and my dad is working... what if some kids decided to smoke pot in our shed or got in a fight on our property? How do we separate ourselves from them legally? Could we fix this by making the students and parents sign a simple disclaimer stating we have zero responsibility for what occurs on our property to them? Do we have a legal right to tow a car, boot a car, and revoke a pass at any time? In general, what things are we overlooking? Everything went relatively smoothly last year but we just want to assure that word isn't getting around that anyone can park there for free... and all these questions keep coming up. They're very unlikely to happen, but one incident could leave us with a lawsuit. Edit: Located in Georgia. Thanks LocationBot! Thanks for your time!
RESPONSE A: > leaving us open to a ton of liability Yep. How is your dad's property insurance? Because if one of those kids gets hurt on his property there "could" be a few issues.
RESPONSE B: Are you legally able to operate a parking business in your area?
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POST: in our shed or got in a fight on our property? How do we separate ourselves from them legally? Could we fix this by making the students and parents sign a simple disclaimer stating we have zero responsibility for what occurs on our property to them? Do we have a legal right to tow a car, boot a car, and revoke a pass at any time? In general, what things are we overlooking? Everything went relatively smoothly last year but we just want to assure that word isn't getting around that anyone can park there for free... and all these questions keep coming up. They're very unlikely to happen, but one incident could leave us with a lawsuit. Edit: Located in Georgia. Thanks LocationBot! Thanks for your time!
RESPONSE A: If a claim occurs on the property and it is a result of him running a business on his property the insurance company is going to deny the claim and then cancel his homeowners policy. What he is doing poses substantial risk and the insurance company is not being paid to cover that additional exposure. That is how insurance rates are determined. He would need to have a separate business liability policy and also have a general business license. If his homeowners gets cancelled for cause he is going to have to go to a subprime market to get a new policy and that is going to cost a fortune. Unless he cash purchased his home he is required to have homeowners insurance as a condition of his mortgage. If he can't get new insurance the mortgage company will impose insurance on him at about 3x the normal rates. This insurance only covers the structure, no contents, no liability. Not a good path to go down. He might get away with it for a long time, but if something goes wrong he is completely boned.
RESPONSE B: Having lived close to a minor league baseball team which didn't have nearly enough parking, pretty much everyone in the neighborhood did this. They'd let people park on their lawns and driveways for $x. I'm pretty sure none of them had permits or anything so not sure why that would be fine (and this was done completely openly. People had signs in their driveways for what they charged) and what you are doing would not be.
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POST: didn’t seem satisfied with our answer but left. A day or so later we noticed that he had spray painted (literally) the curb yellow overnight so that we couldn’t park there anymore. We just shrugged it off because parking isn’t a huge deal and I’m not about to go to war with a neighbor over something so silly. However, a few days later he spray painted it white, then parked his wife’s van there and it didn’t move for weeks. They just left for vacation before Christmas and he spray painted it yellow AGAIN, parked the van in their driveway and took the truck wherever they went. This all seems super petty and dumb, but my husband parked there since they were gone last night and this morning we had a parking citation. Our neighbor has a ring on his door and I feel that he saw the movement, saw the parked car, and called the cops. It is painfully obvious he is spray painting the curb (different color yellow, paint sprayed into our grass, cinder blocks just sitting there so he can use them again next paint job). What can I do? Is this behavior even legal? How can I contest the citation? tl;dr: neighbor is painting public curb to his benefit, we believe he called the cops on us for parking there while they were out of town. Can he continue painting the public curb as he sees fit and can I contest the citation we received based on his behavior?
RESPONSE A: Call the city, not the police. Cities will take a big shit on him for making up parking rules. My friends neighbor made fake no parking signs in front of his house and got huge fines
RESPONSE B: I am not a lawyer but some communities have ordinances in regards to RV and boat parking in driveways. Your petty neighbor may have just picked a fight he’s going to lose. Also, if they are parking on the street long term many communities also have parking limitations of 24-48 hrs before a car can be ticketed as abandoned. I’m not suggesting any of these options just making you aware that these may be options you could resort to if this should continue to escalate.
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POST: his wife to get out of the driveway (whose van never moves from the spot around the corner?) and we agreed to avoid it unless we had guests. He didn’t seem satisfied with our answer but left. A day or so later we noticed that he had spray painted (literally) the curb yellow overnight so that we couldn’t park there anymore. We just shrugged it off because parking isn’t a huge deal and I’m not about to go to war with a neighbor over something so silly. However, a few days later he spray painted it white, then parked his wife’s van there and it didn’t move for weeks. They just left for vacation before Christmas and he spray painted it yellow AGAIN, parked the van in their driveway and took the truck wherever they went. This all seems super petty and dumb, but my husband parked there since they were gone last night and this morning we had a parking citation. Our neighbor has a ring on his door and I feel that he saw the movement, saw the parked car, and called the cops. It is painfully obvious he is spray painting the curb (different color yellow, paint sprayed into our grass, cinder blocks just sitting there so he can use them again next paint job). What can I do? Is this behavior even legal? How can I contest the citation? tl;dr: neighbor is painting public curb to his benefit, we believe he called the cops on us for parking there while they were out of town. Can he continue painting the public curb as he sees fit and can I contest the citation we received based on his behavior?
RESPONSE A: Call the city, not the police. Cities will take a big shit on him for making up parking rules. My friends neighbor made fake no parking signs in front of his house and got huge fines
RESPONSE B: Call the department of public works. Find out if they have a record of tha location being painted for no parking. Assuming no, take written proof that it is NOT a no parking zone in and ask the city prosecutor to dismiss it. You can also ask if the city will ticket the guy for painting the curb in his own.
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POST: curb is directly across from his driveway. He asked us one day to not park there anymore because it was hard for his wife to get out of the driveway (whose van never moves from the spot around the corner?) and we agreed to avoid it unless we had guests. He didn’t seem satisfied with our answer but left. A day or so later we noticed that he had spray painted (literally) the curb yellow overnight so that we couldn’t park there anymore. We just shrugged it off because parking isn’t a huge deal and I’m not about to go to war with a neighbor over something so silly. However, a few days later he spray painted it white, then parked his wife’s van there and it didn’t move for weeks. They just left for vacation before Christmas and he spray painted it yellow AGAIN, parked the van in their driveway and took the truck wherever they went. This all seems super petty and dumb, but my husband parked there since they were gone last night and this morning we had a parking citation. Our neighbor has a ring on his door and I feel that he saw the movement, saw the parked car, and called the cops. It is painfully obvious he is spray painting the curb (different color yellow, paint sprayed into our grass, cinder blocks just sitting there so he can use them again next paint job). What can I do? Is this behavior even legal? How can I contest the citation? tl;dr: neighbor is painting public curb to his benefit, we believe he called the cops on us for parking there while they were out of town. Can he continue painting the public curb as he sees fit and can I contest the citation we received based on his behavior?
RESPONSE A: I would call the city or county first (public works or whoever manages the roads) and see what they think. Typically, a sign is needed to prohibit parking, unless spot is near an intersection, fire hydrant, etc.
RESPONSE B: Call the city, not the police. Cities will take a big shit on him for making up parking rules. My friends neighbor made fake no parking signs in front of his house and got huge fines
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: was clearly not painted and we used it maybe 4-5 times when we had friends visit. This curb is directly across from his driveway. He asked us one day to not park there anymore because it was hard for his wife to get out of the driveway (whose van never moves from the spot around the corner?) and we agreed to avoid it unless we had guests. He didn’t seem satisfied with our answer but left. A day or so later we noticed that he had spray painted (literally) the curb yellow overnight so that we couldn’t park there anymore. We just shrugged it off because parking isn’t a huge deal and I’m not about to go to war with a neighbor over something so silly. However, a few days later he spray painted it white, then parked his wife’s van there and it didn’t move for weeks. They just left for vacation before Christmas and he spray painted it yellow AGAIN, parked the van in their driveway and took the truck wherever they went. This all seems super petty and dumb, but my husband parked there since they were gone last night and this morning we had a parking citation. Our neighbor has a ring on his door and I feel that he saw the movement, saw the parked car, and called the cops. It is painfully obvious he is spray painting the curb (different color yellow, paint sprayed into our grass, cinder blocks just sitting there so he can use them again next paint job). What can I do? Is this behavior even legal? How can I contest the citation? tl;dr: neighbor is painting public curb to his benefit, we believe he called the cops on us for parking there while they were out of town. Can he continue painting the public curb as he sees fit and can I contest the citation we received based on his behavior?
RESPONSE A: Call the city, not the police. Cities will take a big shit on him for making up parking rules. My friends neighbor made fake no parking signs in front of his house and got huge fines
RESPONSE B: Call the cops for the vandalism, also you can park there no matter what he paints. It is the space in front of your house.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: was an area outside of our front yard that the curb was clearly not painted and we used it maybe 4-5 times when we had friends visit. This curb is directly across from his driveway. He asked us one day to not park there anymore because it was hard for his wife to get out of the driveway (whose van never moves from the spot around the corner?) and we agreed to avoid it unless we had guests. He didn’t seem satisfied with our answer but left. A day or so later we noticed that he had spray painted (literally) the curb yellow overnight so that we couldn’t park there anymore. We just shrugged it off because parking isn’t a huge deal and I’m not about to go to war with a neighbor over something so silly. However, a few days later he spray painted it white, then parked his wife’s van there and it didn’t move for weeks. They just left for vacation before Christmas and he spray painted it yellow AGAIN, parked the van in their driveway and took the truck wherever they went. This all seems super petty and dumb, but my husband parked there since they were gone last night and this morning we had a parking citation. Our neighbor has a ring on his door and I feel that he saw the movement, saw the parked car, and called the cops. It is painfully obvious he is spray painting the curb (different color yellow, paint sprayed into our grass, cinder blocks just sitting there so he can use them again next paint job). What can I do? Is this behavior even legal? How can I contest the citation? tl;dr: neighbor is painting public curb to his benefit, we believe he called the cops on us for parking there while they were out of town. Can he continue painting the public curb as he sees fit and can I contest the citation we received based on his behavior?
RESPONSE A: Call the city, not the police. Cities will take a big shit on him for making up parking rules. My friends neighbor made fake no parking signs in front of his house and got huge fines
RESPONSE B: Call your city hall. This has got to be illegal on your neighbors part. Time for cameras of your own
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POST: waiting to drop off their kids. I waited for a few minutes, but after 5 minutes went by and the parents continuing to sit in their unmoving vehicles, I started to lay on my horn. Stacy must have heard me, because when I got home from work, someone had ripped my signs out of the ground and they were gone. I checked my security cameras and they have footage of Stacy destroying the signs. My instinct is to call the police, but one of my neighbors believes that because it affects all three of us, that we might have to escalate this higher. What do you all think?
RESPONSE A: There is a series of potential violations for this school. The zoning ordinance for your local jurisdiction should have a list of uses that are allowed in your zone. Some uses are allowed. Some uses are allowed if approved by the jurisdiction. You will have to research and find out. Pre-school and home daycare might be defined differently, but home daycare has restrictions on the number of children that it can serve. Zoning might also have restrictions on how many buildings can be on the lot (main buildings and accessory buildings). It might or might not allow portable buildings on the lot. In order to construct a building or install a portable building, a building permit is required. The permit would include plans showing the buildings. Also, the buildings have to be constructed according to the Building Code that is in effect in your jurisdiction. Additionally, a pre-school needs a business license that they have to obtain from the local business licensing board. An education license might be required. A health department license might also be required, especially if they prepare food. You can do some of the research yourself. The local building department or equivalent should help you with zoning, permit, and codes. In many jurisdictions, the building permits are public. The local business licensing board can help you find out if the business is licensed, how it is licensed, and how many children can attend.
RESPONSE B: For the destruction of property issue, who is the "someone higher" that you would go to besides the police. As for your main issue, you could check to see if her property is properly zoned for what she's doing and if not report it to the proper authorities (either city or county).
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POST: drop off their kids. I waited for a few minutes, but after 5 minutes went by and the parents continuing to sit in their unmoving vehicles, I started to lay on my horn. Stacy must have heard me, because when I got home from work, someone had ripped my signs out of the ground and they were gone. I checked my security cameras and they have footage of Stacy destroying the signs. My instinct is to call the police, but one of my neighbors believes that because it affects all three of us, that we might have to escalate this higher. What do you all think?
RESPONSE A: Definitely call the police. She definitely committed vandalism by destroying your signs. She also might be violating other regulations like zoning laws. It sounds like the street wasn't designed for nearly that much traffic, and so it seems unlikely that the city would allow her to place a high-traffic business there.
RESPONSE B: There is a series of potential violations for this school. The zoning ordinance for your local jurisdiction should have a list of uses that are allowed in your zone. Some uses are allowed. Some uses are allowed if approved by the jurisdiction. You will have to research and find out. Pre-school and home daycare might be defined differently, but home daycare has restrictions on the number of children that it can serve. Zoning might also have restrictions on how many buildings can be on the lot (main buildings and accessory buildings). It might or might not allow portable buildings on the lot. In order to construct a building or install a portable building, a building permit is required. The permit would include plans showing the buildings. Also, the buildings have to be constructed according to the Building Code that is in effect in your jurisdiction. Additionally, a pre-school needs a business license that they have to obtain from the local business licensing board. An education license might be required. A health department license might also be required, especially if they prepare food. You can do some of the research yourself. The local building department or equivalent should help you with zoning, permit, and codes. In many jurisdictions, the building permits are public. The local business licensing board can help you find out if the business is licensed, how it is licensed, and how many children can attend.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: off their kids. I waited for a few minutes, but after 5 minutes went by and the parents continuing to sit in their unmoving vehicles, I started to lay on my horn. Stacy must have heard me, because when I got home from work, someone had ripped my signs out of the ground and they were gone. I checked my security cameras and they have footage of Stacy destroying the signs. My instinct is to call the police, but one of my neighbors believes that because it affects all three of us, that we might have to escalate this higher. What do you all think?
RESPONSE A: The police can help with vandalism, theft (did she take them?), and maybe trespassing but blocking your driveway is normal when traffic is backed up. My instinct is that the long term solution to your problem involves the city council more than the police. New traffic rules and official signage proba ly is needed.
RESPONSE B: There is a series of potential violations for this school. The zoning ordinance for your local jurisdiction should have a list of uses that are allowed in your zone. Some uses are allowed. Some uses are allowed if approved by the jurisdiction. You will have to research and find out. Pre-school and home daycare might be defined differently, but home daycare has restrictions on the number of children that it can serve. Zoning might also have restrictions on how many buildings can be on the lot (main buildings and accessory buildings). It might or might not allow portable buildings on the lot. In order to construct a building or install a portable building, a building permit is required. The permit would include plans showing the buildings. Also, the buildings have to be constructed according to the Building Code that is in effect in your jurisdiction. Additionally, a pre-school needs a business license that they have to obtain from the local business licensing board. An education license might be required. A health department license might also be required, especially if they prepare food. You can do some of the research yourself. The local building department or equivalent should help you with zoning, permit, and codes. In many jurisdictions, the building permits are public. The local business licensing board can help you find out if the business is licensed, how it is licensed, and how many children can attend.
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POST: the parents waiting to drop off their kids) and I had to wait over 45 minutes to simply pull out of my own driveway. This also happens at the end of the school day. My neighbors and I had a meeting and went over and asked Stacy if there was a way to help resolve the traffic problem. My neighbor's wife does not work and she said she would be willing to volunteer as a crossing guard because she loves kids. We thought that would be a great solution, but Stacy told us that a crossing guard would be unnecessary. We explained to her that the parents are blocking our driveways and are not leaving gaps in front of our driveways for us to leave. Stacy became very belligerent and asked us to leave. I decided to purchase some signs that say "Please do not block driveway" and placed them on either side of my driveway on Sunday night. My neighbors did the same with their own signs. On Monday morning, I walked out to my car and my driveway was still being blocked by the parents waiting to drop off their kids. I waited for a few minutes, but after 5 minutes went by and the parents continuing to sit in their unmoving vehicles, I started to lay on my horn. Stacy must have heard me, because when I got home from work, someone had ripped my signs out of the ground and they were gone. I checked my security cameras and they have footage of Stacy destroying the signs. My instinct is to call the police, but one of my neighbors believes that because it affects all three of us, that we might have to escalate this higher. What do you all think?
RESPONSE A: Definitely call the police. She definitely committed vandalism by destroying your signs. She also might be violating other regulations like zoning laws. It sounds like the street wasn't designed for nearly that much traffic, and so it seems unlikely that the city would allow her to place a high-traffic business there.
RESPONSE B: The police can help with vandalism, theft (did she take them?), and maybe trespassing but blocking your driveway is normal when traffic is backed up. My instinct is that the long term solution to your problem involves the city council more than the police. New traffic rules and official signage proba ly is needed.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: a long line of cars (it is a two lane road with no turning lane) waiting to make the left turn into the pre-school that severely backed up traffic. I tried to pull out of my driveway and onto the street, but the cars refused to move (they are all in park with the parents waiting to drop off their kids) and I had to wait over 45 minutes to simply pull out of my own driveway. This also happens at the end of the school day. My neighbors and I had a meeting and went over and asked Stacy if there was a way to help resolve the traffic problem. My neighbor's wife does not work and she said she would be willing to volunteer as a crossing guard because she loves kids. We thought that would be a great solution, but Stacy told us that a crossing guard would be unnecessary. We explained to her that the parents are blocking our driveways and are not leaving gaps in front of our driveways for us to leave. Stacy became very belligerent and asked us to leave. I decided to purchase some signs that say "Please do not block driveway" and placed them on either side of my driveway on Sunday night. My neighbors did the same with their own signs. On Monday morning, I walked out to my car and my driveway was still being blocked by the parents waiting to drop off their kids. I waited for a few minutes, but after 5 minutes went by and the parents continuing to sit in their unmoving vehicles, I started to lay on my horn. Stacy must have heard me, because when I got home from work, someone had ripped my signs out of the ground and they were gone. I checked my security cameras and they have footage of Stacy destroying the signs. My instinct is to call the police, but one of my neighbors believes that because it affects all three of us, that we might have to escalate this higher. What do you all think?
RESPONSE A: please update us.
RESPONSE B: The police can help with vandalism, theft (did she take them?), and maybe trespassing but blocking your driveway is normal when traffic is backed up. My instinct is that the long term solution to your problem involves the city council more than the police. New traffic rules and official signage proba ly is needed.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: I bought my first car from a dealership two months ago. This week they called to tell me they are “buying my loan from the bank” and I need to give the car back. Hey everyone! Sorry for the long title but I could only condense so much. So I bought a car from a reputable dealership about 2 months ago, I traded In my car, which had no issues. I got a call this week that my trade in wasn’t worth what they paid and that they want to buy my loan from the bank and take my new car back. Is this is something they can do? This seems like a serious threat and it seems like if I have already made payments and changed thing on the car it wouldn’t be possible for them to just take it back. Any advice on how to proceed with this dealership would be appreciated. Thanks everyone! Located in the USA if that makes a difference! TLDR: car dealership wants my car I’ve already made two payments on. Because they made a mistake and payed too much for my car.
RESPONSE A: You sold your car to them, it's their problem that it wasn't worth what they thought it was. Tell them they may kick rocks.
RESPONSE B: Then they need to return your payments, fees, and the car you traded in with no extra mileage. If they can not do those things tell them to contact your lawyer. Not a lawyer.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: I bought my first car from a dealership two months ago. This week they called to tell me they are “buying my loan from the bank” and I need to give the car back. Hey everyone! Sorry for the long title but I could only condense so much. So I bought a car from a reputable dealership about 2 months ago, I traded In my car, which had no issues. I got a call this week that my trade in wasn’t worth what they paid and that they want to buy my loan from the bank and take my new car back. Is this is something they can do? This seems like a serious threat and it seems like if I have already made payments and changed thing on the car it wouldn’t be possible for them to just take it back. Any advice on how to proceed with this dealership would be appreciated. Thanks everyone! Located in the USA if that makes a difference! TLDR: car dealership wants my car I’ve already made two payments on. Because they made a mistake and payed too much for my car.
RESPONSE A: You sold your car to them, it's their problem that it wasn't worth what they thought it was. Tell them they may kick rocks.
RESPONSE B: Are they planning on returning your trade in & give you a full refund? If you search this sub this has happened with a few dealerships.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: I bought my first car from a dealership two months ago. This week they called to tell me they are “buying my loan from the bank” and I need to give the car back. Hey everyone! Sorry for the long title but I could only condense so much. So I bought a car from a reputable dealership about 2 months ago, I traded In my car, which had no issues. I got a call this week that my trade in wasn’t worth what they paid and that they want to buy my loan from the bank and take my new car back. Is this is something they can do? This seems like a serious threat and it seems like if I have already made payments and changed thing on the car it wouldn’t be possible for them to just take it back. Any advice on how to proceed with this dealership would be appreciated. Thanks everyone! Located in the USA if that makes a difference! TLDR: car dealership wants my car I’ve already made two payments on. Because they made a mistake and payed too much for my car.
RESPONSE A: Tell them to fuck straight off You have a contract for the sale. Their decision to pay more for your trade in than it is worth does not change that. Unless you committed fraud with regards to the condition or your ownership of the trade in, they don’t have any recourse.
RESPONSE B: Then they need to return your payments, fees, and the car you traded in with no extra mileage. If they can not do those things tell them to contact your lawyer. Not a lawyer.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: I bought my first car from a dealership two months ago. This week they called to tell me they are “buying my loan from the bank” and I need to give the car back. Hey everyone! Sorry for the long title but I could only condense so much. So I bought a car from a reputable dealership about 2 months ago, I traded In my car, which had no issues. I got a call this week that my trade in wasn’t worth what they paid and that they want to buy my loan from the bank and take my new car back. Is this is something they can do? This seems like a serious threat and it seems like if I have already made payments and changed thing on the car it wouldn’t be possible for them to just take it back. Any advice on how to proceed with this dealership would be appreciated. Thanks everyone! Located in the USA if that makes a difference! TLDR: car dealership wants my car I’ve already made two payments on. Because they made a mistake and payed too much for my car.
RESPONSE A: Tell them to fuck straight off You have a contract for the sale. Their decision to pay more for your trade in than it is worth does not change that. Unless you committed fraud with regards to the condition or your ownership of the trade in, they don’t have any recourse.
RESPONSE B: Are they planning on returning your trade in & give you a full refund? If you search this sub this has happened with a few dealerships.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: I bought my first car from a dealership two months ago. This week they called to tell me they are “buying my loan from the bank” and I need to give the car back. Hey everyone! Sorry for the long title but I could only condense so much. So I bought a car from a reputable dealership about 2 months ago, I traded In my car, which had no issues. I got a call this week that my trade in wasn’t worth what they paid and that they want to buy my loan from the bank and take my new car back. Is this is something they can do? This seems like a serious threat and it seems like if I have already made payments and changed thing on the car it wouldn’t be possible for them to just take it back. Any advice on how to proceed with this dealership would be appreciated. Thanks everyone! Located in the USA if that makes a difference! TLDR: car dealership wants my car I’ve already made two payments on. Because they made a mistake and payed too much for my car.
RESPONSE A: As long as your are current on your car payments, they cannot force you to return the car. If you fall delinquent on your payments, the creditor can repossess your car fairly quickly. While keeping in mind that you are not under obligation to do additional business with the dealership, if they propose a deal on terms that are acceptable to you, then you are free to pursue that deal. However I would advise you to keep the following words of wisdom in mind: "If something sounds too good to be true, it probably is"
RESPONSE B: They can buy the LOAN from the bank, but you own the car. The bank just has a lien on it. And, if they buy the loan, then you just make payments to them and not the bank. But, the bank presumably doesn't go selling individual loans . They sell them off in bulk. And, car dealerships don't want the loans on their books.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: from my doctors office attesting to this fact and a letter explaining that this is an error, along with a request for a copy of the initial seizure report. A person I spoke to at the DMV said that this report would have come from a doctor's office, though due to HIPAA, this call center worker couldn't access my report to provide specifics. I called every doctor I've seen in the two years, which is not many, and all of them said they filed no such report (because I obviously don't have seizures). The "DMV medical team" who handles these reports is not taking phone calls, only written requests or emails which takes about 5 days to respond to. I told the DMV I've submitted paperwork to correct my record and reinstate my license they said that'll take about 20 BUSINESS DAYS to process. Meanwhile, in 15 days, the state PD will be notified that my license is to be confiscated if I don't surrender it voluntarily. So during this time, I can't get myself to work, can't drive and I have a pregnant wife who can go into labor any day now. Do I have any legal recourse here? Anything I can do other than wait it out? What the hell do I even do?
RESPONSE A: Are you absolutely sure this is legit from the DMV and not a scam? Did you call the number on the paper or did you Google the real number yourself?
RESPONSE B: Ok so I used to represent people in these sorts of things. Probably not in your state. The notice should say what you need to do to request a hearing. They also do have a duty to provide you the records in support of their decision. You want to be dealing with the hearings officers at this point, not the DMV itself. They tend to be more responsive, and if they can make one of their hearings go away, they are all about it. May be worth a consult with a local attorney WHO DOES THESE. You don’t want a big expensive flashy attorney. You want one who knows the hearings officers and deals with them regularly. They’ll have the paralegals’ email addresses and back channels to actually communicate with who you want to communicate with.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: DMV took away my license because of a medical condition I dont have. A few days ago, I got a notice in the mail that my license has been recalled and I must surrender it to the state because they received a report that I have a seizure disorder. I do not have a seizure disorder, have never had a seizure, a seizure disorder, or any medical condition that is remotely close. I submitted paperwork from my doctors office attesting to this fact and a letter explaining that this is an error, along with a request for a copy of the initial seizure report. A person I spoke to at the DMV said that this report would have come from a doctor's office, though due to HIPAA, this call center worker couldn't access my report to provide specifics. I called every doctor I've seen in the two years, which is not many, and all of them said they filed no such report (because I obviously don't have seizures). The "DMV medical team" who handles these reports is not taking phone calls, only written requests or emails which takes about 5 days to respond to. I told the DMV I've submitted paperwork to correct my record and reinstate my license they said that'll take about 20 BUSINESS DAYS to process. Meanwhile, in 15 days, the state PD will be notified that my license is to be confiscated if I don't surrender it voluntarily. So during this time, I can't get myself to work, can't drive and I have a pregnant wife who can go into labor any day now. Do I have any legal recourse here? Anything I can do other than wait it out? What the hell do I even do?
RESPONSE A: Just to be clear, did you call the DMV, OR did you call the number on the 'letter'. Because people will fake these outrageous things to get you to call them and give up a bunch of information just to prove you are you...
RESPONSE B: Are you absolutely sure this is legit from the DMV and not a scam? Did you call the number on the paper or did you Google the real number yourself?
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: My dad was diagnosed with dementia. Mom filed paperwork with DMV to take his license away...Is my mom liable for actions after? (California) My dad was diagnosed with dementia. Prior to the diagnosis, he was involved in 2 hit and run incidents which he has no recollection of. The police have stopped by my parents house twice in regards to those incidents. My mother filed paperwork with the DMV to get his license taken away, yet my dad continues to drive his vehicle. If he gets into another accident, can my mother be liable personally? Together, they own a house, but keep separate bank accounts. My father refuses to go into a nursing home and my mom does not know how to proceed. What steps can I as a son take to help protect my mother? She only has her retirement from being a state employee and I want to make sure she can protect herself.
RESPONSE A: Does your dad have a POA? If so, this person can admit him to a nursing home. As far as the keys, make sure your mom hides the keys at all times. Dad may get upset over not being able to find keys, but try to redirect. Taking away driving privileges is probably one of the hardest things, as your dad has been independent for so long. I'm sorry you and your mom are going through this.
RESPONSE B: The Alzheimer's Association has some incredibly helpful information and resources. You should also consider at least a consult with an Elder Law Attorney. They can give you advice on how to protect assets of a couple when one is incapacitated, especially if Medicaid is eventually involved.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: [MA] Unproperly covered/strapped down dump trucks load fell out and damaged my vehicle. All seen on my dashcam. My insurance can’t see license plate on video so the company saying they are not at fault. Do I still have time to claim it with the police? As stated above I was driving and a car away from a dump truck. Their load wasn’t covered properly at all and thing fell out from their truck and damaged my vehicle. It was all caught on my dashcam but I couldn’t see their plate number and my insurance company cannot see it. The company claimed no one reported it (I was on highway I couldn’t pull over) and now I am stuck with the damage cost myself. Do I atleast still have time to go to the police to report it? It happened at the beginning of February. Thank you. TLDR: dashcam caught overloaded/unproperly tied down load of company dump truck that damaged my vehicle when things fell out of their truck on the highway. Unable to locate license plate number. It happened beginning of February. Do I have time to report it to my local police department still?
RESPONSE A: Speak to a supervisor within your insurance company. This isn’t your problem. The police probably aren’t interested at this point.
RESPONSE B: *dashcam video of their truck’s load falling out and damaging your car* Truck company: Nuh uh, can’t prove it! Your insurance company should be able to get it straightened out.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: My ex cosigned for me to buy my car and now she married the guy she left me for. How does this affect my loan? Indiana for context. Long story short, my ex and I bought a car while we were still together. More specifically, she cosigned for me to be able to buy the car. A little over a year after that we were done and she dumped me with the car's financial responsibility and I've been the sole payer of the vehicle for 2.5 years now. If I had to estimate, I've paid maybe 90% of what was paid on the car myself (because it was my car). Unfortunately, she's on the loan too. My bank suggested I trade in the car and have them deal with it. The BMV said I could file a court order to get the title in my name after I pay it off if I show evidence the other lender has abandoned responsibility. Here's the problem though: I was working on option 2 but I didn't want to be dumb and pay it off and drain all my money. But now, she seems to have gone and married the dude she cheated on me with. I guess what I'm asking is: will he have some sort of claim to my vehicle now that they're married? Or am I still safe to proceed with plan B and court order the car in my name. Me and the ex haven't spoken or seen each other for 2 and a half years now. I have the money to pay my car off and have about 2 grand left over. Should I be rushing this now or not? I've no reason to believe she'd suddenly try to come and screw me over now but you never know.
RESPONSE A: Just because she cosigned doesn't mean the loan is in her name. It's just a safety net for the bank/dealership if you defer on your payments they still get their money. As long as you're the one that applied for the loan and pay it off the title should be released in your name.
RESPONSE B: She's on the title and the loan? Or just the loan?
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: My ex cosigned for me to buy my car and now she married the guy she left me for. How does this affect my loan? Indiana for context. Long story short, my ex and I bought a car while we were still together. More specifically, she cosigned for me to be able to buy the car. A little over a year after that we were done and she dumped me with the car's financial responsibility and I've been the sole payer of the vehicle for 2.5 years now. If I had to estimate, I've paid maybe 90% of what was paid on the car myself (because it was my car). Unfortunately, she's on the loan too. My bank suggested I trade in the car and have them deal with it. The BMV said I could file a court order to get the title in my name after I pay it off if I show evidence the other lender has abandoned responsibility. Here's the problem though: I was working on option 2 but I didn't want to be dumb and pay it off and drain all my money. But now, she seems to have gone and married the dude she cheated on me with. I guess what I'm asking is: will he have some sort of claim to my vehicle now that they're married? Or am I still safe to proceed with plan B and court order the car in my name. Me and the ex haven't spoken or seen each other for 2 and a half years now. I have the money to pay my car off and have about 2 grand left over. Should I be rushing this now or not? I've no reason to believe she'd suddenly try to come and screw me over now but you never know.
RESPONSE A: Does the title list you with *and* or *or*?
RESPONSE B: Just because she cosigned doesn't mean the loan is in her name. It's just a safety net for the bank/dealership if you defer on your payments they still get their money. As long as you're the one that applied for the loan and pay it off the title should be released in your name.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: over a year after that we were done and she dumped me with the car's financial responsibility and I've been the sole payer of the vehicle for 2.5 years now. If I had to estimate, I've paid maybe 90% of what was paid on the car myself (because it was my car). Unfortunately, she's on the loan too. My bank suggested I trade in the car and have them deal with it. The BMV said I could file a court order to get the title in my name after I pay it off if I show evidence the other lender has abandoned responsibility. Here's the problem though: I was working on option 2 but I didn't want to be dumb and pay it off and drain all my money. But now, she seems to have gone and married the dude she cheated on me with. I guess what I'm asking is: will he have some sort of claim to my vehicle now that they're married? Or am I still safe to proceed with plan B and court order the car in my name. Me and the ex haven't spoken or seen each other for 2 and a half years now. I have the money to pay my car off and have about 2 grand left over. Should I be rushing this now or not? I've no reason to believe she'd suddenly try to come and screw me over now but you never know.
RESPONSE A: You need to find out how the paperwork is set up. Because from experience, I will tell, when my mother co-signed for my brother, despite her never paying a cent to the loan. When title was issued it was issued to both, (brother’s name) and (mother’s name). When I co-signed for my mom (really weird, they asked her for a co-signer since she owns property and multiple bank accounts and has excellent credit), I never paid a cent to the car, she paid it off within the year, but title was issued to both of us. So find out because if you pay it off you could end up with a car she will be on title for, and if it says “and” it will be a real headache to sell.
RESPONSE B: I believe you are fine co-signed doesn’t me she owns it
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: already down. I know it's not super relevant, but I've spent most of this year trying to get back on my feet after unemployment and losing myself a bit to depression. Today has just been the absolute worse. I can't hold the driver accountable and I feel like the vet lied to me. How can I get my dog back without paying the $300? I can pay it next Friday when I get paid, but I am too broke to pay it now. Is it legal for them to keep my dog and/or overcharge me? How can I prove they overcharged me? Sorry again if I have lots of questions, if I sound stupid, or if I forgot something. I'm just a blubbering idiot right now so I probably sound crazy. Thank you to anyone that reads this though.
RESPONSE A: ER vet places can get very expensive, and they need to be paid because they did the service of fixing up Dobby. You need to think up ways to get your hands on quick cash ASAP to get your dog out before it costs even more. The vet is willing to work with you, so use that: Do you have a local Nextdoor group? See if there are any jobs/needs listed there that you can do this weekend (yard work, dog walking, whatever skills you have). Post a listing there asking for assistance. Bring the vet your $25 from plasma tomorrow to show you are serious about paying - - ask if you can do any kennel work over the weekend to apply toward your bill - - ask your boss again if he can front you just $100 - - bring in the $50 from plasma you get on Sunday. You can do this - - just show the vet you are planning to honor this bill and you can get Dobby home (Dobby is doped out of his mind right now so don't worry that he is missing you). Also, go ahead and apply for Care credit - - sometimes, after a bankruptcy credit is *easier* to get because you can't discharge new debts for many years.
RESPONSE B: Ask your boss to float you. I've had employees get in tough situations and I've floated them their check.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: of this year trying to get back on my feet after unemployment and losing myself a bit to depression. Today has just been the absolute worse. I can't hold the driver accountable and I feel like the vet lied to me. How can I get my dog back without paying the $300? I can pay it next Friday when I get paid, but I am too broke to pay it now. Is it legal for them to keep my dog and/or overcharge me? How can I prove they overcharged me? Sorry again if I have lots of questions, if I sound stupid, or if I forgot something. I'm just a blubbering idiot right now so I probably sound crazy. Thank you to anyone that reads this though.
RESPONSE A: ER vet places can get very expensive, and they need to be paid because they did the service of fixing up Dobby. You need to think up ways to get your hands on quick cash ASAP to get your dog out before it costs even more. The vet is willing to work with you, so use that: Do you have a local Nextdoor group? See if there are any jobs/needs listed there that you can do this weekend (yard work, dog walking, whatever skills you have). Post a listing there asking for assistance. Bring the vet your $25 from plasma tomorrow to show you are serious about paying - - ask if you can do any kennel work over the weekend to apply toward your bill - - ask your boss again if he can front you just $100 - - bring in the $50 from plasma you get on Sunday. You can do this - - just show the vet you are planning to honor this bill and you can get Dobby home (Dobby is doped out of his mind right now so don't worry that he is missing you). Also, go ahead and apply for Care credit - - sometimes, after a bankruptcy credit is *easier* to get because you can't discharge new debts for many years.
RESPONSE B: First, file a report about the hit-and-run. Next, I would do whatever I could to come up with the money - sell plasma or sell something big on Facebook/Craigslist.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: never put myself in a situation that could be interpreted as inappropriate. I feel he is accusing me to just try and win this court case at any cost. No one else was accused. I received a letter from child protective services saying they have 60 days to investigate. The daughter is apparently 'at risk' of sexual abuse. I see that as it didn't happen, but they are investigating because they got the call. I have my whole life ahead of me. This is outrageous. So, I am currently doing whatever I can to prove my innocence. I will take a polygraph. I have 3 reputable people writing character reference letters describing how good of a person I am. I am actively seeking a good PA lawyer. I want to prove my innocence before the investigation even starts. I am willing to cooperate with any investigation. The letter I received is civil action, not criminal. Please let me know what I need to do to prove I'm innocent and those charges are false. Her ex knows these are false. I want to take the fight back to him. I would love to sue him for false accusations, and build a case for my gf to get full custody. I truly want this bastard to pay. I will answer any question I can as long as it doesn't reveal personal info. Please help! TL;DR Read all of it, but if you don't want to to, I'm being falsely investigated for the risk of sexual abuse of my girlfriend's daughter only because of my association to her. But seriously, read all of it. Thanks.
RESPONSE A: Under no circumstances should you take a polygraph without an attorney that YOU have hired telling you to do so. DO NOT TAKE THAT TEST. Don't solicit references, don't talk to CPS, the police, a judge, the ex or even your pastor. Don't say a word to anyone about this situation without an attorney. Hire someone immediately and allow the attorney to navigate this for you.
RESPONSE B: Ask for the child to have custody independent of either party during the civil suit because you believe that the grandmother is coaching the daughter to make accusations. Ask a lawyer about if this could be possible. one that specializes in fraud and family matters is probably the way to go.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: -4 year old daughter. I never touched her inappropriately. I never put myself in a situation that could be interpreted as inappropriate. I feel he is accusing me to just try and win this court case at any cost. No one else was accused. I received a letter from child protective services saying they have 60 days to investigate. The daughter is apparently 'at risk' of sexual abuse. I see that as it didn't happen, but they are investigating because they got the call. I have my whole life ahead of me. This is outrageous. So, I am currently doing whatever I can to prove my innocence. I will take a polygraph. I have 3 reputable people writing character reference letters describing how good of a person I am. I am actively seeking a good PA lawyer. I want to prove my innocence before the investigation even starts. I am willing to cooperate with any investigation. The letter I received is civil action, not criminal. Please let me know what I need to do to prove I'm innocent and those charges are false. Her ex knows these are false. I want to take the fight back to him. I would love to sue him for false accusations, and build a case for my gf to get full custody. I truly want this bastard to pay. I will answer any question I can as long as it doesn't reveal personal info. Please help! TL;DR Read all of it, but if you don't want to to, I'm being falsely investigated for the risk of sexual abuse of my girlfriend's daughter only because of my association to her. But seriously, read all of it. Thanks.
RESPONSE A: Under no circumstances should you take a polygraph without an attorney that YOU have hired telling you to do so. DO NOT TAKE THAT TEST. Don't solicit references, don't talk to CPS, the police, a judge, the ex or even your pastor. Don't say a word to anyone about this situation without an attorney. Hire someone immediately and allow the attorney to navigate this for you.
RESPONSE B: Get a lawyer. Get one now. Someone who specializes in working with third parties in situations like yours. It's not unique, but it's still shitty. Divorce is hell.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: daughter. So, I am being accused of sexual abuse of their 3-4 year old daughter. I never touched her inappropriately. I never put myself in a situation that could be interpreted as inappropriate. I feel he is accusing me to just try and win this court case at any cost. No one else was accused. I received a letter from child protective services saying they have 60 days to investigate. The daughter is apparently 'at risk' of sexual abuse. I see that as it didn't happen, but they are investigating because they got the call. I have my whole life ahead of me. This is outrageous. So, I am currently doing whatever I can to prove my innocence. I will take a polygraph. I have 3 reputable people writing character reference letters describing how good of a person I am. I am actively seeking a good PA lawyer. I want to prove my innocence before the investigation even starts. I am willing to cooperate with any investigation. The letter I received is civil action, not criminal. Please let me know what I need to do to prove I'm innocent and those charges are false. Her ex knows these are false. I want to take the fight back to him. I would love to sue him for false accusations, and build a case for my gf to get full custody. I truly want this bastard to pay. I will answer any question I can as long as it doesn't reveal personal info. Please help! TL;DR Read all of it, but if you don't want to to, I'm being falsely investigated for the risk of sexual abuse of my girlfriend's daughter only because of my association to her. But seriously, read all of it. Thanks.
RESPONSE A: Under no circumstances should you take a polygraph without an attorney that YOU have hired telling you to do so. DO NOT TAKE THAT TEST. Don't solicit references, don't talk to CPS, the police, a judge, the ex or even your pastor. Don't say a word to anyone about this situation without an attorney. Hire someone immediately and allow the attorney to navigate this for you.
RESPONSE B: Make sure to mention to said lawyer his discharge from the Army for psychological reasons. Sounds like the only verifiable piece you have against him.
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POST: 2 years and I wanted to show her that I support her in getting full custody of her daughter. So, I am being accused of sexual abuse of their 3-4 year old daughter. I never touched her inappropriately. I never put myself in a situation that could be interpreted as inappropriate. I feel he is accusing me to just try and win this court case at any cost. No one else was accused. I received a letter from child protective services saying they have 60 days to investigate. The daughter is apparently 'at risk' of sexual abuse. I see that as it didn't happen, but they are investigating because they got the call. I have my whole life ahead of me. This is outrageous. So, I am currently doing whatever I can to prove my innocence. I will take a polygraph. I have 3 reputable people writing character reference letters describing how good of a person I am. I am actively seeking a good PA lawyer. I want to prove my innocence before the investigation even starts. I am willing to cooperate with any investigation. The letter I received is civil action, not criminal. Please let me know what I need to do to prove I'm innocent and those charges are false. Her ex knows these are false. I want to take the fight back to him. I would love to sue him for false accusations, and build a case for my gf to get full custody. I truly want this bastard to pay. I will answer any question I can as long as it doesn't reveal personal info. Please help! TL;DR Read all of it, but if you don't want to to, I'm being falsely investigated for the risk of sexual abuse of my girlfriend's daughter only because of my association to her. But seriously, read all of it. Thanks.
RESPONSE A: How could someone who is always high get in the army?
RESPONSE B: Under no circumstances should you take a polygraph without an attorney that YOU have hired telling you to do so. DO NOT TAKE THAT TEST. Don't solicit references, don't talk to CPS, the police, a judge, the ex or even your pastor. Don't say a word to anyone about this situation without an attorney. Hire someone immediately and allow the attorney to navigate this for you.
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POST: They never put a stop payment on the check, or reissued me another one, and apparently someone had gotten a hold of it, forged my signature and cashed it at a check cashing place. According to the front desk person, putting a stop payment on the check was "never discussed" and they were going to send the check to me after it had been returned. Which doesn't make any sense but ok. They did send me a copy of the cashed check but made it clear that it was my responsibility to keep my records updated with them, and that they had never agreed to stop payment or reissue the check (not true, but kinda my word against theirs at this point). I looked at the cashed check copy. It has the specific check cashing place and also the date it was cashed as well as some type of serial number on the back. It also has stamped "pay to the order of Bank of America for deposit only." I don't understand how the thief cashed a check without ID, unless they had a fake one with my name. I have submitted a police report but haven't heard back yet and to be honest I am not counting on them making an $847.00 check a big priority. Is there any hope at all for me getting my money back? The dentist's office is not willing to budge, period, from their perspective they already paid. Could this possibly be recovered from the check cashing place? I'm guessing it's probably gone for good but I've been in a really rough financial spot lately and this has been a real blow.
RESPONSE A: >Is there any hope at all for me getting my money back? The dentist's office is not willing to budge, period, from their perspective they already paid. What was the timeline here? Was it cashed after you notified that they were sending a check to the incorrect address?
RESPONSE B: I believe you would take the dentist office to small claims for the $847. They owe you that money and they haven't paid it to you. They would then be the ones who have to sue the cheque cashing place for failing to properly ID the person who cashed the cheque.
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POST: Mentor did my taxes, now refuses to give me my refund check crosspost from /r/tax In the summer of 2015, my mentor offered to do my 2014 taxes for me. This is when I was living in CT. I didn't know how to do taxes, so I took them up on the offer because I thought they were someone I could trust. They told me they got the check in March 2016, but keeps making excuses. They said they've mailed it to me several times, but keeps getting mailed back. Then they claimed that they lost the check and can't find it. Now they are ignoring my calls and texts. I have sent messages on a nearly daily basis, but get no response. I really need the money, and have no clue what to do. I don't have the tax refund amount, so I can't look up the status online. What are my options?
RESPONSE A: Go into your local IRS office.
RESPONSE B: Call the IRS/state and get them to send them to you directly. Why did the check even get mailed to this person in the first place?
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POST: Mentor did my taxes, now refuses to give me my refund check crosspost from /r/tax In the summer of 2015, my mentor offered to do my 2014 taxes for me. This is when I was living in CT. I didn't know how to do taxes, so I took them up on the offer because I thought they were someone I could trust. They told me they got the check in March 2016, but keeps making excuses. They said they've mailed it to me several times, but keeps getting mailed back. Then they claimed that they lost the check and can't find it. Now they are ignoring my calls and texts. I have sent messages on a nearly daily basis, but get no response. I really need the money, and have no clue what to do. I don't have the tax refund amount, so I can't look up the status online. What are my options?
RESPONSE A: Go into your local IRS office.
RESPONSE B: Are you sure they actually filed your taxes?
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POST: go that way. Guessing this is probably small-claims type stuff. Would the police do a report or anything for documentation? Any ideas on how I stop this from happening again and can cover my a$$ in case I need to go to court??
RESPONSE A:
RESPONSE B: Small claims nothing, this is a **MAJOR** deal. Some relevant case law: >Glavin v. Eckman , 71 Mass. App. Ct. 313 (2008) Martha's Vineyard property owners and their tree contractor cut down ten mature trees on a neighbor's property to improve their own view of the ocean. The court upheld a jury award granting the wronged property owner the $30,000 replacement cost of the trees, rather than damages measured by the worth of the timber or diminution of the property's value. Mass. Gen. Law Part III, Ch. 242, Sec. 7: >***A person who without license willfully cuts down, carries away, girdles or otherwise destroys trees, timber, wood or underwood on the land of another shall be liable to the owner in tort for three times the amount of the damages assessed therefor***; but if it is found that the defendant had good reason to believe that the land on which the trespass was committed was his own or that he was otherwise lawfully authorized to do the acts complained of, he shall be liable for single damages only. Don't see Defendant able to get away with single damages as there is a CLEAR chain link fence around your backyard. Find a good lawyer, find an arborist, and don't jump to the billboard guys...get someone who knows what they're doing, because you have something **very** actionable. EDIT: OP, I hope you read this and DO NOT MENTION ANYTHING to your neighbor about this. His ass is about to get handed to him; don't diminish your case by saying "so hey man you owe me $200,000 or I'm taking you to court." Do not pass GO, do not collect $200, go straight to a good lawyer's office. If your lawyer wants to send a letter to the neighbor, let him make that call.
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POST: writing, which is my mistake. On Oct. 04 at 5:15 PM I signed the contract. On Oct. 06 at 8:45 PM I messaged the landlord to withdraw my contract. I was living there because I was going to college in Nevada, but due to surgery waitlists (and many other reasons), I will not be returning to that school. The person who I was going to room with actually decided to withdraw their application before I did, but that's a whole different story. The roommate is completely fine with me backing out. I was told by multiple employees that I had 72 hours to back out of the contract. If there was not that 72 hour grace period, I would not have signed the contract. My roommate was also told they had 72 hours to withdraw their contract, which they signed in Nevada. IIRC, in Californian tenants have a 72 hour grace period to cancel their contracts with no penalty. In Nevada, it does not seem that they have this grace period. Right now the landlord is telling me that he can put me on a reletting list, but this requires me finding someone to take my place as well as introducing them to the landlord, which I physically can't do seeing as I'm back in California. Given that I signed the contract in California, does the landlord have to give me the 72 hour grace period? Or, since the landlord and apartment are in Nevada, am I out of luck? Do I have any other options?
RESPONSE A: There is no statutory cooling down period for leases in either state. If your written agreement didn’t spell one out you don’t have one. Your agreement surely has an “entire agreement” clause that says verbal statements mean nothing.
RESPONSE B: Hi there! I’m the LegalFAQ bot. It looks like you may be experiencing housing issues related to housing or eviction. Come to https://legalfaq.org to find legal resources for renters in each state. You can also find links to local groups that can help you with legal, financial, or other problems at https://legalfaq.org/getHelp. Help us provide accurate advice to fellow redditors: if your post was related to housing or eviction, please like this comment; otherwise, please dislike this comment. *v0.1*
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POST: to continue the relationship. What can I advise my co-worker to do?
RESPONSE A: >my co-worker and her daughter moved to the United States 3 years ago from Europe because her then 13 year old daughter was accused of molesting their neighbor's pre-adolescent daughter. This combined with the girl's current relationship with a 33 year old makes me wonder if she was sexually abused as a child. A lawyer wouldn't advise their client to flee the country, so I wonder if your coworker moved to escape an abusive partner or relative who also abused her daughter? > At this point their documents have expired and they are here illegally. There's nothing they can do about that, you can't regain legal status after letting your documents expire. >I don't know much about their relationship, besides the ridiculous age and illegal? age difference. No question mark needed, the age of consent in IL is 17. > I don't know if they engage in sexual activity. He wouldn't be dating a 16 year old otherwise. >Recently he also picked her up unannounced from work and wouldn't let my co-worker know where they are going or where they are when she called after them. That's when you call the police for kidnapping. > She is worried about going to the police because of her illegal status Illinois has a law that prevents local and state law enforcement from arresting someone solely due to their immigration status. >Her daughter is also young and thinks she knows best so any attempt to get to her is a failure Assuming they're from a safe European country (so not Turkey or something), she might be able to best protect her daughter by moving back. He's not likely to follow them across an ocean.
RESPONSE B: In IL, the age of consent is 17 https://www.shaneylaw.com/criminal-defense/sex-offenses/age-of-consent/ The co-worker can have report the man to the police who might decide to prosecuted him for statutory rape or whatever the DA decided to throw at him (IF they are engaging in sexual activity).
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POST: . I asked if her mom knew and she said yes, when I spoke to her mom she confirmed that she knew and is fine with it because he makes her feel loved. I’ve tried speaking to my niece myself about how dangerous this could turn out and she should date someone her own age, but she refuses to recognize this isn’t normal. Is this legal? Could this be considered child neglect?
RESPONSE A: I am Turkish and live in Turkey. Here, taking advantage of minors is a crime. Contact both US and Turkish authorities with detailed explanation and proof. ​ Be safe!
RESPONSE B: ---
> http://imgur.com/a/myIAb
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Author: /u/okidokismokee
Title: **My 16 year old niece (USA) is having an online relationship with a “25” year old man (Turkey)**
Original Post:
> I have recently made contact with my niece whom I haven’t spoken to since she was a baby. However she and I live on opposite sides of the country. She told me she is dating an older man and said he is 25. They met online when she was 14 and kept contact for the last two years, she showed me his fb and he looks at least mid 30’s. He lives in Turkey and she lives in the USA. I asked if her mom knew and she said yes, when I spoke to her mom she confirmed that she knew and is fine with it because he makes her feel loved. I’ve tried speaking to my niece myself about how dangerous this could turn out and she should date someone her own age, but she refuses to recognize this isn’t normal. Is this legal? Could this be considered child neglect?
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LocationBot 4.998375 71/193rds | Report Issues
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POST: he makes her feel loved. I’ve tried speaking to my niece myself about how dangerous this could turn out and she should date someone her own age, but she refuses to recognize this isn’t normal. Is this legal? Could this be considered child neglect?
RESPONSE A: Not a lawyer. Just to add, you, your neice, and her mother have no idea if this guy is actually in Turkey or two blocks away. Or if the picture on the fb page is him. Any feelings of safety because he's on the other side of the planet are completely misplaced.
RESPONSE B: ---
> http://imgur.com/a/myIAb
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*I am a bot whose sole purpose is to improve the timeliness and accuracy of responses in this subreddit.*
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**It appears you forgot to include your location in the title or body of your post. Please update the body of your original post to include this information.**
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***Do NOT delete this post - Instead, simply edit the post with the requested information.***
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Author: /u/okidokismokee
Title: **My 16 year old niece (USA) is having an online relationship with a “25” year old man (Turkey)**
Original Post:
> I have recently made contact with my niece whom I haven’t spoken to since she was a baby. However she and I live on opposite sides of the country. She told me she is dating an older man and said he is 25. They met online when she was 14 and kept contact for the last two years, she showed me his fb and he looks at least mid 30’s. He lives in Turkey and she lives in the USA. I asked if her mom knew and she said yes, when I spoke to her mom she confirmed that she knew and is fine with it because he makes her feel loved. I’ve tried speaking to my niece myself about how dangerous this could turn out and she should date someone her own age, but she refuses to recognize this isn’t normal. Is this legal? Could this be considered child neglect?
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LocationBot 4.998375 71/193rds | Report Issues
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POST: Help! My landlord (Jacksonville Florida) changed the locks on my apartment! My landlord overnight changed the locks on my apartment door. He didn’t file any eviction notice, or anything with the court at all. I called my clerk of courts and she told me to just go back inside the home. I can’t, the doors are locked. Can anyone please advise me on the proper filing procedures, and I will file immediately in the morning.
RESPONSE A: Call a locksmith to have the doors rekeyed so you can get back into your apartment: landlords aren't allowed to do "illegal self-help evictions." This advice is predicated on the assumption that you have a valid lease or rental agreement, all your stuff is still in the apartment, and you have not been formally served with an eviction lawsuit (and thereafter had the sheriff forcibly remove you from the unit). Even if you are behind on rent, the landlord has to go through the courts to evict you. If your possessions are in the unit and the landlord changed the locks out of the blue, call a locksmith.
RESPONSE B: Hi there! I’m the LegalFAQ bot. It looks like you may be experiencing housing issues related to housing or eviction. Come to https://legalfaq.org to find legal resources for renters in each state. You can also find links to local groups that can help you with legal, financial, or other problems at https://legalfaq.org/getHelp. Help us provide accurate advice to fellow redditors: if your post was related to housing or eviction, please like this comment; otherwise, please dislike this comment. *v0.1*
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: Help! My landlord (Jacksonville Florida) changed the locks on my apartment! My landlord overnight changed the locks on my apartment door. He didn’t file any eviction notice, or anything with the court at all. I called my clerk of courts and she told me to just go back inside the home. I can’t, the doors are locked. Can anyone please advise me on the proper filing procedures, and I will file immediately in the morning.
RESPONSE A: Hi there! I’m the LegalFAQ bot. It looks like you may be experiencing housing issues related to housing or eviction. Come to https://legalfaq.org to find legal resources for renters in each state. You can also find links to local groups that can help you with legal, financial, or other problems at https://legalfaq.org/getHelp. Help us provide accurate advice to fellow redditors: if your post was related to housing or eviction, please like this comment; otherwise, please dislike this comment. *v0.1*
RESPONSE B: Call the police. Also see here: https://www.jaxlegalaid.org/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/lockout-brochure.pdf
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POST: Help! My landlord (Jacksonville Florida) changed the locks on my apartment! My landlord overnight changed the locks on my apartment door. He didn’t file any eviction notice, or anything with the court at all. I called my clerk of courts and she told me to just go back inside the home. I can’t, the doors are locked. Can anyone please advise me on the proper filing procedures, and I will file immediately in the morning.
RESPONSE A: You call the police and ask for an escort, you call a locksmith then charge your landlord the cost to have it rekeyed out of your rent, with a receipt and explanation. You will have to pay up front, but not okay. You also file for the illegal eviction so you can use that as help to be reimbursed for the costs associated with all this. If you need to break a window to get in, the police would aid in that so you a) have a witness and b) don't have to worry your landlord is waiting inside to confront you or anything.
RESPONSE B: Hi there! I’m the LegalFAQ bot. It looks like you may be experiencing housing issues related to housing or eviction. Come to https://legalfaq.org to find legal resources for renters in each state. You can also find links to local groups that can help you with legal, financial, or other problems at https://legalfaq.org/getHelp. Help us provide accurate advice to fellow redditors: if your post was related to housing or eviction, please like this comment; otherwise, please dislike this comment. *v0.1*
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POST: I had a legal 28 days to move out of my apartment and the landlord changed the locks today Hello, so I’m in a very messy situation right now with everything going on. I broke the lease by not paying because he wouldn’t fix the dishwasher and I told him I wouldn’t pay until it was fixed and he ignored me and now this has happened. I’m staying with my parents for now but so much is going on and this is pushing me over the edge. I didn’t get an eviction notice I don’t think just the 28 day lease breakage that said I had till January 14th. The landlord texted me that if I try to go into that apartment he will have me shot because it’s breaking the lease In Colorado
RESPONSE A: File a police report over the threat. Also, call the police non-emergency line and ask for a civil standby while you go to his place and ask for a key to the property. Locking you out is illegal.
RESPONSE B: Hi there! I’m the LegalFAQ bot. It looks like you may be experiencing housing issues related to housing or eviction. Come to https://legalfaq.org to find legal resources for renters in each state. You can also find links to local groups that can help you with legal, financial, or other problems at https://legalfaq.org/getHelp. Help us provide accurate advice to fellow redditors: if your post was related to housing or eviction, please like this comment; otherwise, please dislike this comment. *v0.1*
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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POST: I had a legal 28 days to move out of my apartment and the landlord changed the locks today Hello, so I’m in a very messy situation right now with everything going on. I broke the lease by not paying because he wouldn’t fix the dishwasher and I told him I wouldn’t pay until it was fixed and he ignored me and now this has happened. I’m staying with my parents for now but so much is going on and this is pushing me over the edge. I didn’t get an eviction notice I don’t think just the 28 day lease breakage that said I had till January 14th. The landlord texted me that if I try to go into that apartment he will have me shot because it’s breaking the lease In Colorado
RESPONSE A: Def call police . And possibly consult with a lawyer who deals with landlord / tenant issues and fair housing .
RESPONSE B: I am a lawyer, I am not your lawyer, and I am not a lawyer in your state. You’ve gotten some relevant advice about contacting the police, which please ensure you do. I noted though that you mentioned the dispute arose from the landlord not making reasonable repairs. Are these mentioned in your lease? If so your landlord is in breach of the lease and not you. Which would mean your landlord is likely on the hook for reasonable relocation costs (and in some jurisdictions and difference in rent between your current lease and your new one). I HIGHLY suggest you speak with an attorney who practices landlord tenant law as you may be able to recoup some of your damages from this situation.
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POST: I had a legal 28 days to move out of my apartment and the landlord changed the locks today Hello, so I’m in a very messy situation right now with everything going on. I broke the lease by not paying because he wouldn’t fix the dishwasher and I told him I wouldn’t pay until it was fixed and he ignored me and now this has happened. I’m staying with my parents for now but so much is going on and this is pushing me over the edge. I didn’t get an eviction notice I don’t think just the 28 day lease breakage that said I had till January 14th. The landlord texted me that if I try to go into that apartment he will have me shot because it’s breaking the lease In Colorado
RESPONSE A: Hi there! I’m the LegalFAQ bot. It looks like you may be experiencing housing issues related to housing or eviction. Come to https://legalfaq.org to find legal resources for renters in each state. You can also find links to local groups that can help you with legal, financial, or other problems at https://legalfaq.org/getHelp. Help us provide accurate advice to fellow redditors: if your post was related to housing or eviction, please like this comment; otherwise, please dislike this comment. *v0.1*
RESPONSE B: I am a lawyer, I am not your lawyer, and I am not a lawyer in your state. You’ve gotten some relevant advice about contacting the police, which please ensure you do. I noted though that you mentioned the dispute arose from the landlord not making reasonable repairs. Are these mentioned in your lease? If so your landlord is in breach of the lease and not you. Which would mean your landlord is likely on the hook for reasonable relocation costs (and in some jurisdictions and difference in rent between your current lease and your new one). I HIGHLY suggest you speak with an attorney who practices landlord tenant law as you may be able to recoup some of your damages from this situation.
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POST: I had a legal 28 days to move out of my apartment and the landlord changed the locks today Hello, so I’m in a very messy situation right now with everything going on. I broke the lease by not paying because he wouldn’t fix the dishwasher and I told him I wouldn’t pay until it was fixed and he ignored me and now this has happened. I’m staying with my parents for now but so much is going on and this is pushing me over the edge. I didn’t get an eviction notice I don’t think just the 28 day lease breakage that said I had till January 14th. The landlord texted me that if I try to go into that apartment he will have me shot because it’s breaking the lease In Colorado
RESPONSE A: Wait a minute, He actually said he would have you shot in writing? Did he sign it?
RESPONSE B: Def call police . And possibly consult with a lawyer who deals with landlord / tenant issues and fair housing .
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POST: I had a legal 28 days to move out of my apartment and the landlord changed the locks today Hello, so I’m in a very messy situation right now with everything going on. I broke the lease by not paying because he wouldn’t fix the dishwasher and I told him I wouldn’t pay until it was fixed and he ignored me and now this has happened. I’m staying with my parents for now but so much is going on and this is pushing me over the edge. I didn’t get an eviction notice I don’t think just the 28 day lease breakage that said I had till January 14th. The landlord texted me that if I try to go into that apartment he will have me shot because it’s breaking the lease In Colorado
RESPONSE A: Wait a minute, He actually said he would have you shot in writing? Did he sign it?
RESPONSE B: Hi there! I’m the LegalFAQ bot. It looks like you may be experiencing housing issues related to housing or eviction. Come to https://legalfaq.org to find legal resources for renters in each state. You can also find links to local groups that can help you with legal, financial, or other problems at https://legalfaq.org/getHelp. Help us provide accurate advice to fellow redditors: if your post was related to housing or eviction, please like this comment; otherwise, please dislike this comment. *v0.1*
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POST: have also caught this very same landlord stealing power from me in the last few months and when I contact my property management company nothing is done. He has been plugging in an extension chord into my standalone building to do repairs to other buildings on property without notification or any compensation. I drove home from my vacation yesterday to try and figure things out, My belongings are still in the house and I had to stay in a hotel room last night. My friend that was staying at our place for the week said they had a locksmith there within minutes and gave me no notification.
RESPONSE A: If you do want to make a big deal over this, you've already accrued some statutory damages based on this lockout incident. You'd need to do an actual consult with a landlord/tenant attorney to get at the exact figures for statutory damages. 789.3 specifies $100/day but no less than $250 for changing the lock. Another section (194x or 195x, or 115x/6x, It's been a while) up to $2K each for acts of constructive eviction. California courts have a hate boner for landlords who do this sort of thing. For the electricity thing, are you certain the outlets he's using are connected to your meter? Next time he's doing it, just go kill the circuit breaker that feeds them.
RESPONSE B: If you can't get into your apartment, call the police immediately and let them know you've been illegally evicted. The landlord has to give 30 days' notice to vacate before filing any eviction paperwork. >He has been plugging in an extension chord into my standalone building to do repairs to other buildings on property without notification or any compensation. Can you install security cameras to catch him? Is there a way you can block off those outlets? From now on audio record every single conversation you have with this landlord. Now, since California is a two-party-consent state you will have to tell him he is being audio recorded each time, but that can only work in your favor. He will either shut up and stop being a dipshit, or he will put his foot in his mouth and give you all the evidence you need for a successful small claims suit.
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POST: Boss asks us to clock out if we’re slow So, I work at a Subway (In Arkansas) and our boss recently told the closers that if we’re slow, one person needs to clock out and sit down for 30 minutes. We still have to be at the subway, but we have to clock out and just sit there. Is this legal? Is there anything I should do?
RESPONSE A: You're an employee and your boss sets your schedule. He can tell you to clock out and when to clock back in. He CAN'T tell you where to be or what you can or can't do while clocked out. Can he fire you for leaving? Realistically, yeah, he can make up literally any reason to fire you. But if you are required to stay he has to pay you while you're there, even if there isn't any work to be done.
RESPONSE B: You can be asked to clock out. You can be asked to clock back in 30 minutes later. During that 30 minutes you aren't working and can do anything you want including leave the building. If you are late coming back, that can be considered late to clock in and you can be disciplined according to store rules.
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A
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POST: O daughter and was awarded $5,000 a month in child support. Around 6 months ago, Mom started leaving daughter home alone for long weekends, with no money and only the food in the house to go party. Recently, Mom called to say she wasn't coming home at all and she was moving in with her boyfriend. Of course, she didn't tell Dad about any of this, and a 15 year old being 15 kept it from him as well. Dad was on a 4 month stint in TX and only learned what was happening when Daughter finally let him know she was out of food and there was no money in the house. Currently the situation is that Dad is back in Michigan trying to get the daughter out of the hole she is now in (grades went from As and Bs to Ds and Fs) but he will eventually have to either quit his job ( not a great option: High school diploma education only, no experience in anything else and pays the mortgage) to return to MI, or leave on the road again. Right now when he does go out of town on the small jobs he is taking the daughter stays with a neighbor family My question are as follows: 1. Is there a way he can prove neglect and abandonment on Mom's part to get full custody even if he is not able to be there full time? 2. Is there a way of reclaiming the last few months of child support if you can prove that the money was not used to support the child? 3. Is there a legal way to arrange/ grant partial caretaking to the neighbor family who are looking after daughter? I don't want this girl to end up in foster care, and I really don't think that Mom should be collecting money for a child she left with no money or food for weeks. Additionally if anyone knows of tutoring resources in Michigan to help her get her grades up and maybe a good child and family therapist in Huron county that would be helpful.
RESPONSE A: And might I suggest boarding school? Teenagers usually love it, withh 5,000/month Dad could cover somewhere pretty ritzy, and it would accomodate his intensive travelling.
RESPONSE B: He should call CPS where daughter is located. Also worry the kid some money
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: learned what was happening when Daughter finally let him know she was out of food and there was no money in the house. Currently the situation is that Dad is back in Michigan trying to get the daughter out of the hole she is now in (grades went from As and Bs to Ds and Fs) but he will eventually have to either quit his job ( not a great option: High school diploma education only, no experience in anything else and pays the mortgage) to return to MI, or leave on the road again. Right now when he does go out of town on the small jobs he is taking the daughter stays with a neighbor family My question are as follows: 1. Is there a way he can prove neglect and abandonment on Mom's part to get full custody even if he is not able to be there full time? 2. Is there a way of reclaiming the last few months of child support if you can prove that the money was not used to support the child? 3. Is there a legal way to arrange/ grant partial caretaking to the neighbor family who are looking after daughter? I don't want this girl to end up in foster care, and I really don't think that Mom should be collecting money for a child she left with no money or food for weeks. Additionally if anyone knows of tutoring resources in Michigan to help her get her grades up and maybe a good child and family therapist in Huron county that would be helpful.
RESPONSE A: 1. Step one is to call CPS. Nothing can be done unless they document the situation. CPS will hear the daughters version of the events and any physical evidence that she has. 2. I doubt he'll be able to recoup the past child support. 3. There is, but it will likely require a lawyer. And this would have to be done after the CPS investigation to determine if that is an appropriate course of action. The girl won't end up in foster care. She's got family that is willing to take care of her. Foster care is the last option.
RESPONSE B: And might I suggest boarding school? Teenagers usually love it, withh 5,000/month Dad could cover somewhere pretty ritzy, and it would accomodate his intensive travelling.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: with 15 YO daughter and was awarded $5,000 a month in child support. Around 6 months ago, Mom started leaving daughter home alone for long weekends, with no money and only the food in the house to go party. Recently, Mom called to say she wasn't coming home at all and she was moving in with her boyfriend. Of course, she didn't tell Dad about any of this, and a 15 year old being 15 kept it from him as well. Dad was on a 4 month stint in TX and only learned what was happening when Daughter finally let him know she was out of food and there was no money in the house. Currently the situation is that Dad is back in Michigan trying to get the daughter out of the hole she is now in (grades went from As and Bs to Ds and Fs) but he will eventually have to either quit his job ( not a great option: High school diploma education only, no experience in anything else and pays the mortgage) to return to MI, or leave on the road again. Right now when he does go out of town on the small jobs he is taking the daughter stays with a neighbor family My question are as follows: 1. Is there a way he can prove neglect and abandonment on Mom's part to get full custody even if he is not able to be there full time? 2. Is there a way of reclaiming the last few months of child support if you can prove that the money was not used to support the child? 3. Is there a legal way to arrange/ grant partial caretaking to the neighbor family who are looking after daughter? I don't want this girl to end up in foster care, and I really don't think that Mom should be collecting money for a child she left with no money or food for weeks. Additionally if anyone knows of tutoring resources in Michigan to help her get her grades up and maybe a good child and family therapist in Huron county that would be helpful.
RESPONSE A: And might I suggest boarding school? Teenagers usually love it, withh 5,000/month Dad could cover somewhere pretty ritzy, and it would accomodate his intensive travelling.
RESPONSE B: As already said, call CPS and get it documented.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: Parents insisting I (18F) sign a power of attorney document My sister and I are both leaving for college in a few days and my parents suddenly handed us power of attorney documents to sign. They’ve resisted attempts by my sister to talk to a lawyer about this decision first, and we’re hesitant to sign. My parents explained that it is in case one of us is incapacitated and they would have to take over our finances, but the document itself seems to be giving them more power than that. Could someone explain what exactly I’m signing, and if there’s a way to ensure this financial, legal, medical, etc power is ONLY for if I can’t make those decisions myself?
RESPONSE A: "No" is a complete sentence. Generally, a power of attorney lets someone enter into contracts, make legal decisions, take on debt, spend money, and so on on your behalf. A more limited power of attorney might not allow all of that - a limited power of attorney might only allow medical decisions, for example, or might only come into effect under certain conditions, such as incapacity. The text of the power means what it says, so if yours looks like it gives general authority, it probably does. In theory, they are responsible to you for how they do that, but in practice, it's up to you to hold them accountable. My general advice is that a power of attorney is a tool _for you_ to manage _your_ affairs. It's not a tool for anyone else to impose on you. If you do not have a specific goal in mind, then don't sign a power of attorney. If you would be considering this one "to keep the peace," then get it professionally reviewed.
RESPONSE B: There is no good reason for you to sign this. Do not sign it under any circumstances.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: Parents insisting I (18F) sign a power of attorney document My sister and I are both leaving for college in a few days and my parents suddenly handed us power of attorney documents to sign. They’ve resisted attempts by my sister to talk to a lawyer about this decision first, and we’re hesitant to sign. My parents explained that it is in case one of us is incapacitated and they would have to take over our finances, but the document itself seems to be giving them more power than that. Could someone explain what exactly I’m signing, and if there’s a way to ensure this financial, legal, medical, etc power is ONLY for if I can’t make those decisions myself?
RESPONSE A: There is no good reason for you to sign this. Do not sign it under any circumstances.
RESPONSE B: > Could someone explain what exactly I’m signing There are several types of power of attorney, so no one here can. You are smart to read it and question it. It's common these days for parents to want/get some sort of medical POA ("Durable Power of Attorney for Health Care") whereas it wasn't common at all when I went off to college. Even though it's common, and lots of websites and parents groups push parents to do it, there's no reason you should unless you want to. It means that if you are incapacitated, they can make medical decisions for you. Do you want that? As for "the document itself seems to be giving them more power than that" it very well may, you can Google the types of POA, and there is ZERO reason to want to sign anything else over to them.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: my sister to talk to a lawyer about this decision first, and we’re hesitant to sign. My parents explained that it is in case one of us is incapacitated and they would have to take over our finances, but the document itself seems to be giving them more power than that. Could someone explain what exactly I’m signing, and if there’s a way to ensure this financial, legal, medical, etc power is ONLY for if I can’t make those decisions myself?
RESPONSE A: > Could someone explain what exactly I’m signing There are several types of power of attorney, so no one here can. You are smart to read it and question it. It's common these days for parents to want/get some sort of medical POA ("Durable Power of Attorney for Health Care") whereas it wasn't common at all when I went off to college. Even though it's common, and lots of websites and parents groups push parents to do it, there's no reason you should unless you want to. It means that if you are incapacitated, they can make medical decisions for you. Do you want that? As for "the document itself seems to be giving them more power than that" it very well may, you can Google the types of POA, and there is ZERO reason to want to sign anything else over to them.
RESPONSE B: They are your parents. As such they already are the default decision-makers in the event you are incapacitated and unable to provide your own decisions in regard to medical care or the like. A POA is unnecessary for that. But it can be abused, used against your wishes, even if you are still hale and hearty. There is no reason for you to sign this. So don't. Also, you're 18. You say they've "resisted attempts... to talk to a lawyer about this decision first," but as a legal adult they can't stop you from seeing one on your own. They don't have to provide a ride, but surely you can find a way. Ask a friend, take the bus, call Uber. A consultation would be cheap or possibly free (call around to make an appointment, and ask how much it'd cost when you do).
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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A
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POST: medical, etc power is ONLY for if I can’t make those decisions myself?
RESPONSE A: I'm not going to repeat the advice here about not signing. ​ What I will say is DOCUMENT THIS. Get it in writing why your parents want it. Get it in writing them asking you. Get it in writing that they won't let you talk to a lawyer. Make sure any threats are in writing. While a dependance override is almost impossible to get if you and your sister have a string of evidence " Give us POA or move out." "Give us POA or no FASFA" "Give us POA or else...." your schools financial aid is going to be able to help you. If you don't document, and shit hits the fan, (you aren't allowed home, etc) you have about a 0.000001% chance of getting any help next year. Even if you are supporting yourself independently. You also may be able to request a call with the dean of students, explain the situation and have him or her give you the words to use. They might even be willing to meet with them. (or add something to the parent-side "don't be a dumbass" orientation)
RESPONSE B: I'll add a practical example to some of the legal terms thrown around regarding types of POA. I'm in the military, and before we go on deployment I'll mention POAs to my folks since it always comes up. A limited POA will let, say, their spouse sell their car or their house--ie, things they were already planning on doing, but the service member can't be there in person to sign for. I always, ALWAYS warn them against mistakenly signing a general power of attorney; this could allow their spouse to, instead of just selling their car, liquidate their bank account and sell the house too in addition to God knows what. As others have stayed, limited POAs are very specific and CAN be useful, but I'm super sketched out by this. If one of the folks working for me we're to mention this to me, I would immediately send them to the legal department.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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B
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POST: Parents insisting I (18F) sign a power of attorney document My sister and I are both leaving for college in a few days and my parents suddenly handed us power of attorney documents to sign. They’ve resisted attempts by my sister to talk to a lawyer about this decision first, and we’re hesitant to sign. My parents explained that it is in case one of us is incapacitated and they would have to take over our finances, but the document itself seems to be giving them more power than that. Could someone explain what exactly I’m signing, and if there’s a way to ensure this financial, legal, medical, etc power is ONLY for if I can’t make those decisions myself?
RESPONSE A: I'll add a practical example to some of the legal terms thrown around regarding types of POA. I'm in the military, and before we go on deployment I'll mention POAs to my folks since it always comes up. A limited POA will let, say, their spouse sell their car or their house--ie, things they were already planning on doing, but the service member can't be there in person to sign for. I always, ALWAYS warn them against mistakenly signing a general power of attorney; this could allow their spouse to, instead of just selling their car, liquidate their bank account and sell the house too in addition to God knows what. As others have stayed, limited POAs are very specific and CAN be useful, but I'm super sketched out by this. If one of the folks working for me we're to mention this to me, I would immediately send them to the legal department.
RESPONSE B: This document would give them immediate access to your medical, financial, and college situations. They could open and close bank accounts in your name. Open and close credit cards in your name. They could call your OBGYN and request the entirety of your medical records. They could call your school whenever for access to your grades and class list. This gives them complete control over you and once you sign it their word takes precedent over yours.
Which response is better? RESPONSE
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