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I just upped my price
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What?
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A hundred bucks a date.
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Forget it.
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Forget her sister, then.
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It's about time.
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A deal's a deal.
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How'd you do it?
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Do what?
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Get her to act like a human
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I don't know, Dorsey. ..the limo.the flowers. Another hundred for the tux
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Enough with the Barbie n' Ken shit. I know.
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The vintage look is over, Kat. Haven't you been reading your Sassy?
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Yeah, and I noticed the only part of you featured in your big Kmart spread was your elbow. Tough break.
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They're running the rest of me next month.
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Hey do you mind?
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Not at all
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Where ya goin?
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Away.
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Your sister here?
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Leave my sister alone.
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And why would I do that?
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And he means that strictly in a non prisonmovie type of way.
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Yeah we'll see.
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What've you got for me?
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I've retrieved certain pieces of information on Miss Katarina Stratford I think you'll find helpful.
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Okay Likes: Thai food, feminist prose, and "angry, stinky girl music of the indierock persuasion".
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So what does that give me? I'm supposed to buy her some noodles and a book and sit around listening to chicks who can't play their instruments?
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Gigglepuss is playing there tomorrow night.
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Don't make me do it, man
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Cameron, I'm a little busy
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It's off. The whole thing.
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What 're you talking about?
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She's partial to Joey, not me
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Cameron do you like the girl?
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Sure
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Then, go get her
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What'd you do to her?
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I don ' t know. I decided not to nail her when she was too drunk to remember it.
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She hates you with the fire of a thousand suns . That's a direct quote
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She just needs time to cool off I'll give it a day.
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You makin' any headway?
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She kissed me.
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Where?
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What's the worst?
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You get the girl.
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You the new guy?
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So they tell me...
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C'mon. I'm supposed to give you the tour.
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So which Dakota you from?
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North, actually. How'd you ?
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I was kidding. People actually live there?
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Yeah. A couple. We're outnumbered by the cows, though.
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How many people were in your old school?
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Thirtytwo.
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Get out!
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How many people go here?
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Couple thousand. Most of them evil
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That I'm used to.
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Yeah, but these guys have never seen a horse. They just jack off to Clint Eastwood.
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That girl I
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You burn, you pine, you perish?
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Who is she?
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Bianca Stratford. Sophomore. Don't even think about it
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Why not?
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I could start with your haircut, but it doesn't matter. She's not allowed to date until her older sister does. And that's an impossibility.
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Why do girls like that always like guys like that?
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Because they're bred to. Their mothers liked guys like that, and their grandmothers before them. Their gene pool is rarely diluted.
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He always have that shiteating grin?
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Joey Dorsey? Permashitgrin. I wish I could say he's a moron, but he's number twelve in the class. And a model. Mostly regional stuff, but he's rumored to have a big tube sock ad coming out.
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You know French?
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Sure do ... my Mom's from Canada
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Guess who just signed up for a tutor?
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You mean I'd get a chance to talk to her?
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You could consecrate with her, my friend.
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Yeah, just a minor encounter with the shrew.
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That's her? Bianca's sister?
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The mewling, rampalian wretch herself.
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I teach her French, get to know her, dazzle her with charm and she falls in love with me.
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Unlikely, but even so, she still can't go out with you. So what's the point?
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What about him?
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You wanna go out with him?
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What makes you think he'll do it?
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He seems like he thrives on danger
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No kidding. He's a criminal. I heard he lit a state trooper on fire. He just got out of Alcatraz...
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They always let felons sit in on Honors Biology?
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I'm serious, man, he's whacked. He sold his own liver on the black market so he could buy new speakers.
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Forget his reputation. Do you think we've got a plan or not?
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Did she actually say she'd go out with you?
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That's what I just said
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You know, if you do go out with Bianca, you'd be set. You'd outrank everyone. Strictly Alist. With me by your side.
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I thought you hated those people.
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Hey I've gotta have a few clients when I get to Wall Street.
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You got him involved?
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Like we had a choice? Besides when you let the enemy think he's orchestrating the battle, you're in a position of power. We let him pretend he's calling the shots, and while he's busy setting up the plan, you have time to woo Bianca.
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This is it. A golden opportunity. Patrick can ask Katarina to the party.
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In that case, we'll need to make it a schoolwide blow out.
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Will Bogey get bent?
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Are you kidding? He'll piss himself with joy. He's the ultimate kiss ass.
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Number one. She hates smokers
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