Non-SpongeBob Dialogue
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Mr. Krabs: Step aside, boy! You're blocking me money-makin' bulletin board! Dave: When I eat at the Krusty Krab, all I get is a dark, empty feeling inside! P-Star7. Ouch! Mr. Krabs: Not on my bulletin board! Surfer Fish: Whoa, whoa, dude! What's with the censorship? The community bulletin board is for everybody. You can't just take somethin' down because you think it's bogus. | Mr. Krabs, Surfer Fish is right. The board is sacred and it must be respected. Dear P-Star7, I'm so sorry you had a less than stellar experience at the Krusty Krab and we promise to do better in future. Signed, Fry-Banshee139. Crisis averted. Huh? Crisis averted? More like crisis dumb-blurted. Signed, Guybesideu3? Huh? Dumb-blurted! LOL!?, What's the Point?, I could make a better patty out of mud?! Where are all these notes coming from? |
Mr. Krabs: Pencils, paper! Pencils, paper! Martin: I want to express the worst side of myself! Mr. Krabs: Heh, heh, heh. Why not? And don't forget to feed your hatred with a selection from our menu! Squidward: Huh? Hmm. | If only I could figure out who this P-Star7 is. |
Patrick: Hello! Nat Peterson: P-Star7 is my new hero. Patrick: Hey, that's me! Harold: Yeah, right. Fred: He really knows how to complain. Patrick: But I wasn't com... Unnamed customer: P-Star7 is cool because he's anonymous. Patrick: Oh, yeah. He's cool because He's a nanny-mouse. Bubble Bass: You may not like what P-Star7 has to say, but you have to agree that he keeps it real. He's a true hero for our troubled times. | Well, I'll just have to make my Krabby Patties better so P-Star7 will like 'em. No, it's not round enough. Uh, maybe just a little off the edge here. No, now the other side is wobbly. I'll just even it up a little here. Now it's smaller than that one! Hey, Squidward! |
Squidward: Yes? | Has P-Star7 responded to my nice note yet? |
Squidward: Oh, he responded hours ago. | Well, why didn't you tell me? |
Squidward: Because I don't care. | That's for me! Fry-Banshee139, more like Cry-Baby139! Cordially, P-Star7. |
Bubble Bass: His vituperative hyperbole has certainly diminished your credibility. | Oh, why did you have to say that? |
Bubble Bass: You're right. I should have put it on the bulletin board instead. Signed, HandsomeLad42. | You may be handsome, HandsomeLad42, but you're very mean! |
Mr. Krabs: Alright, that's a good one. Heh, heh. Hey, you know all this note-writing must be making you folks hungry. We have a short line at the register. Sheldon: I brought a bag lunch. Mr. Krabs: What? Wait a second. None of you bulletin board browsers are buying me patties! Medley Fishbowl: Why would we buy food from a place that quote Smells like stinky armpits? Mr. Krabs: What? Mr. Krabs: That's not true! Medley Fishbowl: Hey, it's on the board. Bubble Bass: And the board is never wrong. Mr. Krabs: And does anyone need to buy a pen? Mr. Krabs: How about some paper? Patrick: What's wrong? | It's this P-Star7. He's been saying terrible things about me and the Krusty Krab. |
Patrick: Oh, I think they were all good things. | Not good. He said that the Krusty Krab made him feel dark and empty inside. |
Patrick: Well, he probably meant his stomach was dark and empty and he was hungry for more. | No. A master of acid-wit like P-Star7 would never express himself so clumsily. He called me Cry-Baby139. |
Patrick: You were Fry-Banshee?! | Yeah. |
Patrick: Well, maybe he just thought it was funny. And... and when he said that Krabby Patties taste like old baseball gloves... | He said that?! |
Patrick: Oh, not yet! Mr. Krabs: Tastes like old baseball gloves, do they? Squidward: I don't know who this P-Star7 is, but he's brilliant! Mr. Krabs: He's a diabolical genius! That's what he is! Patrick: No, I'm not. | Mr. Krabs, the grill's gone cold. |
Mr. Krabs: Nobody's orderin', son. It's that cursed cork board! I'm gonna take it down! It's nothing but trouble! | You can't Mr. Krabs! It's for the community! I'll still believe in the power of the bulletin board! |
Sandals: You smell! Gus: One of your eyes is too big! Bubble Bass: Close your mouth when you eat!? Pearl: Oh! This picture looks like it was drawn by a Brine Shrimp! Oh, Daddy! Squidward: Huh? Squidward Tentacles should never be allowed behind a cash register. P-Star7? Oh, that is it! Why can't any of these yokels understand I'm working here? Ironically! Bubble Bass: Oh, sure you are. P-Star7 has your number alright. Squidward: I'm gonna give you a number, of contusions! | People, can't you see what's happened? This bulletin board has become a bullying board! |
Mr. Krabs: Okay, that's it! Everybody out! | Oh, P-Star7 is bringing out the worst in everybody. I'd like to send him a message. |
Mr. Krabs: We'll teach him a lesson he'll never forget! | A lesson in polite manners. |
Squidward: Or we could push him off a cliff. Mr. Krabs: Oh, excellent option, Mr. Squidward. | We have to find out who this P-Star7 is! Gentlemen, I propose a stakeout! Pineapple1 to Maddaddy. Come in, Maddaddy. |
Mr. Krabs: This is Maddaddy. I read you, Pineapple1. Any movement? | Negatory. Pineapple1 to Delicate Flower. Come in, Delicate Flower. |
Squidward: I AM NOT ANSWERING TO DELICATE FLOWER! Mr. Krabs: Shh. Maintain radio silence. Wait a minute. I see something. | So that's what happens to the ketchup stains. Surprise, P-Star7! |
SpongeBob, Mr. Krabs, and Squidward: Patrick?! Mr. Krabs: I'll tear ya to pieces! | Patrick, you're P-Star7? |
Patrick: Well, that's what my last note was about, SpongeBob. I was upset that people take everything I say the wrong way. | So, when you said that Krabby Patties reminded you of old baseball gloves, you really meant that they gave you the feeling of your carefree youth. |
Patrick: Yeah, I think. | You hear that, boardy? It wasn't you. It was never you. We were the monsters all along. |
Mr. Krabs: Well, I'm still angry and I need somethin' to calm me down! Ooh! This knittin' circle oughta do the trick. And you all are joining me! Especially you, Delicate Flower. Squidward: Oh, ratfish! | Pineapple1 to Knitmama. Can I needle you for a little more yarn? |
Squidward: Oh, brother. Please bring back P-Star7. Johnny Elaine: This is a Bikini Bottom News special report. Perch? Perch Perkins: Perch Perkins here at the Bikini Bottom power plant, where the evil supervillain known as the Dirty Bubble has finally been cornered by police! Dirty Bubble: Stand back, coppers, and cease your attack, or I'll make your police chief my late night snack! Police chief: Do what he says! Perch Perkins: Will the grime of this evil soap globe wash over our fair city? Or will the law force him to clean up his act? Dirty Bubble: Or will he choose door number three, and devour a newsman live on TV? Officer Slugfish: Drop him, airhead! Perch Perkins: Yipe! Officer Johnson: I got him! Dirty Bubble: Remember this face and remember it well, so you'll recognize me when I see you in— Police chief: Jail! Johnny: Six months later... Clean Bubble: Thank you, warden. I feel like a new bubble. Warden: Remember, Bubble, keep it clean, or you'll get mean. Clean Bubble: Thank you, warden. I promise I won't let you down! Warden: Here's the address of your new job. Clean Bubble: I'll make you proud, warden. Stay clean or you'll get mean. A new life. No more dirt, and no more wrong turns. The Krusty Krab. Hm, this must be the place! Oh, I can't thank you enough for this job, Mr. Krabs. What would you like me to do? Greet people at the door? Serve the food? Mr. Krabs: Oh, no. I've got a special job that need someone with your special talents. You're on dirty dish detail. Clean Bubble: D-d-d-d-dirty dishes? Wait, couldn't I just work the cash register or something? Mr. Krabs: Listen, I hired a dish-washing bubble to save money on soap, and I want these plates sparkling by lunchtime, savvy? Clean Bubble: Just call me Sparkles. Clean Bubble: Stay clean, or you'll get mean. Stay clean, or you'll get mean. Clean Bubble: Ah? | Yeah. Brr! Is there a blizzard coming in, 'cause I've got a cold front. |
Clean Bubble: | Oh, hi! I didn't see you there, you must be the new dishwasher. Welcome aboard! I'm SpongeBob. |
Clean Bubble: Hi, SpongeBob, I'm, uh... DB, uh... DB. | Oh, we're gonna have so much fun, DB. We'll be daily pallies! Whoops. Back to work! |
Clean Bubble: Keep it clean, or you'll get mean. Keep it clean, or you'll get mean! Clean Bubble: Huh. Hey, I did it! I got dirty and I didn't turn evil! Oh, I must be cured! Clean Bubble: Wiping up filth, wiping clean every crack! Dirty Bubble: I'm the Dirty Bubble, and, baby, I'm back! | Oh, what can I get you, Dirty Bubble? |
Dirty Bubble: | Dirty Bubble! Where's that nice DB? What did you do to him, you super filthy supervillain? |
Dirty Bubble: | What did you do with DB? DB is short for Dirty Bubble, isn't it? |
Clean Bubble: Yes, SpongeBob, it's me. I'm trying to change my evil ways and stay clean. | Wow, a supervillain intervention! I'll help you, DB. I'll make sure you stay squeaky clean and dirt-free! |
Mr. Krabs: Attention, Mr. Bubble, I've got another job for ya! Mr. Krabs: Now, this new job is very exclusive and very French. Clean Bubble: Hmm? Ooh-la-la! Mr. Krabs: Eau de Toilette! Clean Bubble: Oh, sacre pee-yew! Mr. Krabs: Make it sparkle! | Okay, he's gone. Don't worry about those toilets, DB. I will clean them for you. Taupe sweet, mon ami. |
Clean Bubble: Dirt, dirt! Beautiful dirt! | Zut alors! DB? Incoming! |
Dirty Bubble: Fred: ' Dirty Bubble: Pow! Hold onto your certy, here comes the dirty! Clean Bubble: Thanks for keeping me clean, SpongeBob! | Don't worry, DB. We just needed to wash away that stinkin' thinkin'! |
Elaine: For weeks, SpongeBob worked with DB to stay clean and good! Clean Bubble: Enjoy those patties! | Well, DB, looks like you're cured. You haven't been dirty in weeks! |
Clean Bubble: Thanks to you, SpongeBob, I'll never be dirty again! Patrick: Speaking of dirty... Ew. Dirty Bubble: You want me clean, but I ain't willing! I've gotta be me, by being a villain! Patrick: Aww... That's nice. He found his rainbow! | Uh-oh. |
Elaine: The Dirty Bubble has been seen everywhere, defiling dozens of decent denizens with dirty deeds! Girl and boy: Clean? Pirate: So I said to the scalawag, Listen here, you– Chubby sailor: It's time to have tea and cakes! Sailor #1: Get him! Family of three: Yay! Family of three: Aww. Old teacher: Yes, Billy, 2 plus 2 still equals 4. Old teacher: Rumpy rumpkins. Perch Perkins: Breaking news, the Dirty Bubble just wiped all the teacher's dirty looks right off their faces! Who will be next? Dirty Bubble: No more pimples, no more bumps, no more news guy's dirty looks! Perch Perkins: Hello– Urrgh, that got in my mouth! Dirty Bubble: Oh! | Sorry, old chum, but from now on, you're gonna have to stay clean for good! |
Dirty Bubble: Be gone, hygiene. I'm too big to stay clean! | |
Dirty Bubble: | It's on, now! |
Dirty Bubble: | Help, help, call the cops, call Mr. Krabs, call my mommy! |
Dirty Bubble: I think, for dessert, I'll eat more dirt! | Not Goo Lagoon! Thank you, my beloved pet Gary, thank you, my big pineapple, and my toolshed, and my mailbox, and Patrick! Uh, what? Wow. Sometimes I just forget how absorbent I am. |
Dirty Bubble: Wait, what? Ow, just... stop spinning, you sponge! You're stealing my grunge! Stop that rhyme! Dirty Bubble: I may be a squirt, but I'm still full of dirt! | Aww, little mini DB is so cute! |
Lady officer: We got him! | Every time I wash dishes, I will think of you. |
Dirty Bubble: Hmph. Every time I have nightmares, I'll think of you, too! Lady officer: Thank you, citizen. We'll take it from here. | It was a dirty job, but somebody had to do it. Just kidding! |
Police officers: Gesundheit! | Thank you! You got some schmutz under there. |
Mr. Krabs: Attention! Attention! All Krusty Krew employees, attention! Get the anchors out of your pants and report to me office! That will be all. I have an important announcement to make. | Woo! Hooray! The new spatulas are here! |
Mr. Krabs: Sit down, boy! There's no new spatulers! Squidward: How disappointing. Mr. Krabs: You may know me daughter Pearl. She's growing up fast. It seems like it was just yesterday I was teaching her how to breach. Me mammalian angel. Oh... Anyway, uh, so she's going to be working here during her summer vacation. She's got a lot of fresh ideas to bring in some hungry customers! Pearl: Hello? Daddy? Mr. Krabs: Thar she blows! Squidward: SpongeBob, do you realize what this means? | No new spatulas? |
Squidward: No! It means some bratty teenager's coming in here to tell us what to do. We can't have that! We have seniority, right? | Right! |
Squidward: So, we'll work together to protect our pathetic positions. | Okey-dokey, Squidward. And then we'll get those new spatulas! |
Mr. Krabs: All right, men. Say hello to me Pearl. | Hello, pole. |
Pearl: Hi, guys. Mr. Krabs: It makes me jolly as a roger to have you finally aboard the family business! Pearl: Great, dad, because I have so many new ideas. Mr. Krabs: I can smell the money already! I'll be in me office if you need me! | What's in the box? |
Pearl: It's a surprise. | I like surprises. |
Pearl: Great, then close your eyes. | I'm ready! |
Squidward: Well, I like it so far. Pearl: Ta-da... It's the new Krusty Krew uniform. I designed it myself. Squidward: Okay, this is it, SpongeBob. Now tell her how you really feel about that uniform. | Okay, Squidward. Pearl... this is the greatest uniform ever! |
Squidward: Fish paste. Pearl: Oh, SpongeBob, you look so adorable. I could just eat you up. | Sorry, Pearl, but this item's not on the menu! |
Squidward: Well, I didn't think it was possible, SpongeBob, but you look even more ridiculous than usual. Pearl: Don't feel jealous, Uncle Squiddy. I made one for you, too. Squidward: Don't bother! Only a fool would wear that! Mr. Krabs: Avast, ye shipmates! Don't these just shiver your timbers? Get that suit on, sailor. It's already been paid for. Squidward: Rage. Fury. Irritation. Humiliation. Pearl: Squidward is such a barnacle. | A stick in the sand. |
Pearl: But not you, SpongeBob. You are full of style. | Me? Really? |
Pearl: Totally, S.B. You ooze fashion. And I've got some completely coral concepts for this old joint, and I'm going to need someone with your kind of talent to help me. | Well, I have been trying to get Mr. Krabs to make a few changes around here. |
Pearl: Why, with my girlish instincts and your um... sponginess, we'll turn this worn-out lunch wagon into a teenage paradise. Pearl: SpongeBob, what do you like better? The Kutie Krab or the Kooky Krab? Squidward: For what, dare I ask? Pearl: The new name for our new look. I mean, The Krusty Krab has got to go. Who wants to eat at a place they think is crusty? Bleh! Squidward: Well, sure it's a terrible name, but this is a terrible place. Therefore, the name should be left alone. Right, SpongeBob? | I got it! How about The Khaotic Krab? |
Pearl: Hmm... how about The Kissy Krab? | The King Krab? |
Pearl: The Kandy Krab! | The Kool Krab. Or the Kowboy Krab! The Kurly Krab. The Kreepy Krab. The Killer Krab! |
Pearl: Aaah! No! | You're right, too scary. |
SpongeBob and Pearl: The Kuddly Krab! Millie: It's a shame old man Krabs sold the Krusty Krab. Fred: That's a darn shame. Hey, lady! Do you know where we can get something to eat around here? Squidward: That's it! I quit! Shelia: Finally! A cool place for teens to just, you know, hang out! | Pearl, you're a genius. All these young, hip new customers. Phooey on Squidward. He can't keep up with the times. You're a true visionary, Pearl. |
Pearl: Thank you, SpongeBob. I do have 20/20 vision. | Well, hip people have to eat, too. Back to the grill. The customers may be hot, but my grill is hotter. |
Pearl: SpongeBob, order up! | Two... sa-lads. Never heard of it. I got to stay hip. I don't want to end up like silly old Squidward. But what in the name of Davy Jones' locker is a sa-lad? Here you go. Two sa-lads. |
Pearl: Ew, gross. Those aren't salads. Take those back. Remove the bun, the patty and the condiments. | But that just leaves the lettuce and the tomato. |
Pearl: Exactly. | All right. Okay, no buns. That's hip. No patties, happenin.' Oh, yeah, that's definitely the coolest meal I've ever saw. |
Nazz: This is so cool! | Two salads. That was awful. I hope I never have to tear apart a perfectly good Krabby Patty ever again. I don't think my heart can take it. Where's the grill? |
Pearl: Come on, SpongeBob, you're a hip guy. You know that fried foods are O-U-T, out! | Uh... right on. |
Pearl: Check out this new menu I came up with. | Salad and tea. But where are the Krabby Patties? |
Pearl: Silly, those aren't hip. And you won't be needing that thing anymore. I've got something more fun for you to do anyway. Gus: Hey, buddy, you need a ride? I was just on my way to the big doofus convention! | This is humiliating. I'm a fry cook, darn it! You can take away my spatula, but when you take away my dignity, that's when I get mad! I'm going to march right up to Mr. Krabs' office and tell him this is just too much! Okay, SpongeBob, you can do this. Come on... Mr. Krabs, can I talk to you? |
Mr. Krabs: Come on in, me boy! Have a seat. | Thanks, Mr. Krabs. |
Mr. Krabs: Don't you just love me new office? Pearly designed it for me. | Mr. Krabs, um, I think we have a problem. |
Mr. Krabs: Isn't that the neatest $40 chair you ever sat in? | Sure, Mr. Krabs, but I've got some bad news. |
Mr. Krabs: How about my cuddly executive buddy? Reduces stress for only five easy payments of $9.95. | Mr. Krabs, Pearl is ruining the Krusty Krab! |
Mr. Krabs: What?! Why, Pearl is saving the Krusty Krab! I mean, the Kuddly Krab. What would we do without these beautiful $20 sea unicorn wall hangers? How could we ever survive without these $35 heart lights? How could we go on without a sea fern on every last table?! It's hip! It's coral! It's... it's losing money! Oh, you're right, SpongeBob. But I can't fire me pride and joy, it'll break her fragile little heart! What am I going to do? | There, there, Mr. Krabs. I'm sure there's another way. |
Mr. Krabs: That's it, boy! | What's it? |
Mr. Krabs: You could fire her! It's okay if she hates you. | That's not what I said, sir. |
Mr. Krabs: Great then, it's all settled: you fire Pearly, I'll wait in me office. Pearl: Totally rude, SpongeBob. | Pearl, can I see to you in the kitchen for a second? |
Pearl: Sure, SpongeBob. | How am I going to break it to her? I've never fired anyone before. I just got to say it. Pearl, you're fired! Okay, here it goes. |
Pearl: Oh, SpongeBob! Pearl: I can't take it anymore! Nothing I do is working! | Sure it is, Pearl. Look at all the hip, young people eating sa-lads! |
Pearl: No, don't you get it?! I've been trying to get fired since day one! I was only pretending to like this place to please Daddy. This job is cutting majorly into my social life. Oh, SpongeBob, what should I do? | I got it! I can pretend to fire you. I'll take the heat from old man Krabs later. |
Pearl: Gosh, you'd really do that for me? You're a great pal, SpongeBob. How can I ever thank you?! | Stop trying to break me in half? |
Pearl: Deal. Oh, boy! | Okay, Pearl. We've got to make this convincing. Pearl, I need to have a word with you! |
Mr. Krabs: Oh no, here it goes! I don't know if I can bear to listen. | It's not that you haven't done a good job around here, it's just that... |
Mr. Krabs: Don't be too hard on her, now. Why does it have to be this way? It's for the best. | Well, we feel it might be in everybody's best interest if... |
Mr. Krabs: I can't let him do this! Get on with it, SpongeBob! | Pearl, you're fired. |
Pearl: Thanks, SpongeBob. Come on, gang, the mall awaits! | Hey, Mr. Krabs, I did it! |
Mr. Krabs: Oh, Pearly... Is that a $20? Oh, SpongeBob, how could I have done such a thing to me own flesh and blood? | There, there, Mr. Krabs. Pearl took it just fine, in fact, she seemed sort of happy. |
Mr. Krabs: Really? | She's off to bigger and better things. |
Mr. Krabs: That's me old girl; tough as nails, just like her old man! But how am I gonna get my money back for all this stuff? | Isn't this great, Gary? And it only cost me one year's salary! |
Gary: Meow? Unnamed woman: Grandma! No! Plankton: Get her, Grandma! I'm the ghost of Plankton! Wooo! Hey, that gives me an idea. Hmm, if I were a ghost, I could walk right through the walls of the Krusty Krab and take the Krabby Patty secret formula! Karen: Ah! All right, that's it! You ruined another movie night with your secret formula garbage. I'm pulling the plug. Plankton: Ah. Let's see. Now all I need to do is invent a... Ghost extracting machine! Plankton: I look like I just saw a ghost. Success! You gotta give up the ghost if you wanna make toast. What?! No, no, no! Stupid ghost hands! What? What's so funny? Stupid ghost! Flying Dutchman: You are, that's what. You can't just float in on your first day and pick things up. Here you go. Oh, grab it. Grab it! Get it! Plankton: I can't grab it! Flying Dutchman: I like you, squirt. I got a soft spot in me heart of thieves I can teach you how to pick things up. Plankton: I love you. Flying Dutchman: But first, you need to learn the basics of being a ghost. Flying Dutchman: First lesson... Shape-shifting. Shape-shifting is one of the easiest things a ghost can do. You just have to think of a horrible thing and poof! You become it! Flying Dutchman: Now, you try. Plankton: I did it! Flying Dutchman: That's not horrible! What were you thinking?! Bad ghost! Bad! Flying Dutchman: Hmm. Now, that's horrible! Plankton: Now, can you teach me how to pick things up? Flying Dutchman: Not yet. Next lesson, scaring. Pay close attention, squirt. This is how you scare someone. Plankton: Okay, my turn! Shh. Someone's coming. Watch me scare this dummy real good. Flying Dutchman: Well, you scared yourself. I guess that counts. Next lesson. Haunting houses. All right, pupil, it's time to apply all you've learned and frighten this guy's legs off. Plankton: With pleasure. Squidward: Who's there? Ohh, is that you, SpongeBob? Flying Dutchman: Oooh. Monster mouth with a bucket of ghost goo—very good marks. Nice haunt, swabby! Squidward: Oh, what a terrible nightmare. Oh, thanks for being here, Clarry. You'll keep the monsters away. Plankton: Give me that! Squidward: Clarry! Plankton: Hey, I picked something up! I can pick things up! Flying Dutchman: Look at you. You skipped ahead to the last lesson! Plankton: It's okay. You don't have to— Flying Dutchman: Last lesson! How to pick things up. As you discovered, to pick things up, you gotta get really angry! Plankton: Why didn't you say that before in the first place, moron?! Flying Dutchman: I have nothing left to teach you. Plankton: Oh, yeah? Flying Dutchman: My boy. Plankton: Oh, I'm really angry! Here we go! Yup! Blasted bottle! It's always something! What? Flying Dutchman: Guess you didn't think that one through all the way, did ya? Plankton: Dead jerk. Well, I'm calling it. This ghost racket is for the birds. I'm going back to my body where I belong. Hmph! Huh? I don't remember leaving the lights on. Wha—huh?! Yeesh. You can't leave your own carcass alone for ten minutes in this town! Karen: And now, if anyone has anything nice to say about Sheldon, this would be the time. | Um, Plankton was small and... And green and loud! |
Karen: All right, come on. It's okay. Plankton: Yeesh. This is the worst funeral of mine I've ever been to. But watch these idiots scream when I get back into my body and jump out of that coffin. Flying Dutchman: Ya can't go back in your body now. You're dead, ya dodo! Plankton: I'm not dead. I'm just a temporary ghost. My body is in suspended animation, that's all. Flying Dutchman: You mean, this is an empty vessel? I haven't possessed a body in years! Plankton: You can't do that! That's my body! Flying Dutchman: Not anymore! Rarg! I'm alive! It's great to be back! Plankton: No! Flying Dutchman: Ta-da! | Plankton's alive? Hooray! |
Karen: I knew it! Incidental 67: He's alive?! Old Man Jenkins: Let's squash him! Flying Dutchman: ♪Dee, dee, dee, dee, da, da, dee, dee, dee, da!♪ Wuh-oh. Eh? Reowr? Plankton: Oh! I can't watch them do that to me! Flying Dutchman: Here! Take it! Those people are angry. Whew! I never thought I'd say this, but I'd rather be a dead me than an alive you. Bye! Plankton: My body feels great! What Zit Tooya: There he is! Plankton: Hey, everybody. Uh, who wants to hear a ghost story, huh? Anyone? You know something? Ooh! It's great to be alive. Ouch! Ha, ha! Flying Dutchman: The end! | I know I've said this 90 times already but... ♪I love Krabby Patties I think that they are swell. They are the best, there's no contest, and now I'm going to yell.♪ Whew! ♪I love Krabby Patties! I think they're swell. They're so neat, and quite a treat, and how I love the way they smell... La la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la la.♪ |
Squidward: I knew I shouldn't have gotten out of bed today. | ♪La la la la laaaaaaa... la la la la!♪ |
Mr. Krabs: Hello, and welcome one, and all your money to ye olde Krusty Krabbie! Ms. Priss: Come along, sisters. Pay no mind to this crimson abomination! Squidward: Ms. Priss: Greetings. Although your establishment seems repugnant and foul in nature, it seems not to offend our sensitivities. It is for that reason, plus the fact that we have been stuck on a tour bus for several days, that my sisters and I would like to eat something here. Squidward: Okay. But first, let me call the mortician and tell him his uniform's been stolen. Clothing zinger! Mr. Krabs: Squidward! These wretched hags-I mean, these little lovely ladies-are obviously here to eat. So let's sell 'em- I mean, serve them some delicious Krabby Patties! Ms. Priss: Well, Mr...um... Mr. Krabs: Krabs, my lady. Ms. Priss: Mr. Krabs, you know the basic rules of behaving like a civilized bottom feeder. Perhaps your restaurant isn't quite the hive of degenerates it appears to be, and we had you figured all wrong. Mr. Krabs: 'Course ya did, because you're about to find out. SpongeBob! | ♪Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah... I like Krabby Patties! I think they're swell. I like Krabby Patties, can you not tell? Krabby Patties, Krabby Patties. They're so neat. La la la la la. Sweet to eat. La la la la la. Really neat. Sweet to eat. Treat that's neat. Sweet treat sweet treat. La la la la la la la la laaaaaaaa!♪ |
Ms. Priss: Look at this wild hooligan! Running amok, singing, dancing. It's... It's shameless. Disgusting. Avert your eyes. Young man, what has caused you to act like this? I must know! | Actually, ma'am, it was the absolute fun and deliciousness of a Krabby Patty. |
Ms. Priss: Krabby Patty? | Yeah, that's right. |
Ms. Priss: Well, anything this fun and delicious can't be good. Why, what would this world be if everyone cavorted it in such a manner? Mr. Krabs: Who are you with your tight lips, raised eyebrows, and conservative clothes? Ms. Priss: I am Ms. Gristlepuss. We are The United Organization Of Fish Against Things That Are Fun And Delicious. Or, T.U.O.O.F.A.T.T.A.F.A.D. for short. And we are going to ban these so called Krabby Patties, and close your restaurant forever! Mr. Krabs: What the...! | Ms. Gristlepuss, maybe if you were to taste the Krabby Patty for yourself, you too could experience the awesome pleasure. |
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