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SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [Update]Me [36 F] with my Husband [39 M] (15years married), I found out that my husband has a secret family, i dont know if i can stay with him.
POST: 1st Post
***
Today i had lunch with the other woman. Shes only fucking 23...
Lets call her Candi(She looks like a Candi). Candi is from Vegas. and my husband flew her out, and put her up. She doesnt work. she goes to school. which im guessing my Husband also pays for.
She says that Ted told her that he had decided to take me back, and he broke it off with her back then. She didnt find out she was pregnant until later. She had planned on taking care of the kid on her own, until her job in vegas fell though, and she had no where else to turn.
Basically, Ted finds out he has a kid, Flew Candi and her son out to us, and has been supporting them every since.
I asked her if she knew that Ted and I were still together. She did.
I asked her if she knew that Ted had been lying to me this entire time, she did. Then i asked her if she and Ted had ever slept together after we had gotten back together.
She told me, that they havent. Candie said that Ted does stay over sometimes, when she has a night class. So i asked her if she is dating anyone. She said no. Turns out that she is in love with my husband. Shes not afraid to tell me that, because she knows that i cant do anything to her. She said that i dont deserve a guy as good as Ted for what i did to him. She said that sooner or later, Ted would realize this and leave me for her and his son.
At this point my hate was fuming over... I couldnt help myself. I punched her. she grabbed her face, and i realized i actually hit someone. I scrambled out of Panera Bread, and made myself scarce.
About an hour ago Ted texted me, asking wtf did i do. was i wrong?
TL;DR: | Met babysmom for lunch. she said to much. and i punched her in the face, in the middle of Panera bread. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Budding programmer needing some advice.
POST: I'm about done with the school system. Not "finished", but just done. I'm almost done with my second year of university (Applied CS major), and I don't know how much longer I can stick with it. I had problems with school my entire life and always got bad grades. I never clicked with it. I wasn't trying to be a rebel or anything, I just couldn't ever convince my brain to make it a priority.
Work is the other way around. I have a part-time job (very few hours), and I love being there. I love feeling productive, like I'm contributing to something and getting compensated for it, feeling like part of a machine. I have no trouble applying myself towards work -- it doesn't completely drain my motivation, energy, and emotions like school has after 16 years.
I have a real knack for programming. It's one of the few things I have a talent for. I've always picked up on logic and problem solving, and working on code brings me back to my exploration of logic puzzles and games when I was a child. I pick up on programming principles and techniques faster than any other subject, and I thoroughly enjoy myself even in seemingly mundane tasks. Nothing feels better than working on a structure for a few hours, having it fail, and figuring out the problem. It's like vicodin to me.
What are my options? I know I can stick with school. I know that's what I should do. And I'll try. But I'm having so much trouble with it that not exploring other options at this point seems foolish. Exactly what skills do I need to learn to be hirable? Once I learn these skills, how can I become certified and get the credentials I need on my resume? What sacrifices would I be making by not getting my degree?
TL;DR: | School isn't going too well and I need more options. What are the steps I need to take to be hirable if I can't get my degree? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: My ex best friend/ crush got a friend with benefit...
POST: So some background knowledge, this girl (i'm a guy btw) was my best friend last year and we had a massive fight that resulted in us trying to avoid each other. Whilst in the middle of the fight i started to become interested in her as i was missing her presence so much. Eventually we made up and now we're like two people starting a new friendship. I started to talk to her again and i was being more flirtatious as our relationship grew once again. We both made it quite clear in the past that we probably wouldn't ever have feelings for each other (which i completely fucked up) but nevertheless she was enjoying my flirtatious side anyway. So fast forward about a month, i've been flirtin' my ass off with her and talking to her every other day until earlier today she texts me that she has a friends with benefits (cue dramatic heartbreak music). So being the fuckup that i am, i went all stupid and just told her that i had grown feelings for her. She responded quite well and said that was cool and all but she didn't feel the same because of all our history. I could probably go into more detail but i'm not sober enough to, so i'll try explain any questions that come up. I told her i still want to go on a date with her and she said ok, but reluctantly with the fear of leading me on. I thought what the hell, i still like her so what's the worst that can happen? anyway question is what the fuck do i do now?
TL;DR: | ex best friend/crush has a friend with benefit, my heart is broken, i still like her, and i'm drinking the pain away. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by seeing my own mistakes
POST: So not a fuck up from today but over a period of time.
Last weekend my SO came at my place and told me we need to talk, I knew where this was going she had been given hints in her texting and body language. I said i'm not ready to give up something that she did not expect me to do since I've been hard on her in the past.
Now thanks to having a lot of time and thinking i've seen where i went wrong and what i did wrong . I'm basicly affraid of commitment and anything that comes together with it. Like when she said she wanted children i said i won't and that i hoped if she was pregnant she'd let it been taken care of, or that i solemly wanted to buy a house on my own not together with her, and a multiple series of these things. Now i've seen that i do want kids with her, buy a house, get married,... I had put up an enourmous big wall around myself due to insecurities and former relationships that i just said the opposite of what i wanted. So now i saw the light we are still on a break but i have seen her sunday and told her about it. She would not believe me znd i cant blame her fornmonths i've been saying the opposites to every thing she wanted with me and to come closer to me. And now i fucked up i feel that we wont come back together she still loves me but she's not sure if she can find the energie to work for the relationship.
TL;DR: | insecure guy so almost dumps me see she's the love of my life blast trough my wall with tnt see where i was wrong now i probably lost ly SO |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [29M] with [30F] sweet, cute, got-her-stuff-together, new dating prospect. Issue: Minimal to zero mutual hobbies or cultural interests. What do?
POST: Hello reddit,
I am a single 29M freshly into a "new" dating market thanks to a move back to my hometown (large midwestern city). I met a very nice 30F about two weeks ago and have gone out with her twice for 2-3 drinks over 2-3 hours. We have pontificated about life, school experiences, work experiences, our families, and so on. It's all very preliminary but we set up plans to see each other again and have little text conversations once or twice a day. In short, it's brand new and low pressure/no commitment but looking like good mutual interest.
The Catch: As far as I can tell we almost have no points of mutual hobby or cultural interest. I have your classic nerd loves (star wars, hobbits, gaming, etc), follow baseball and hockey, read a lot in a lot of different genres, keep up with the film world and what I consider high quality hbo/amc TV, and so on.
She is with me on casual sports fandom - I'm sure we would have fun at a game - but that is about it. We also of course have almost no similar music taste.
And yet, I like this girl. I feel dumb for being skittish about a relationship prospect because we don't have a common frame of pop culture reference, or because I think we're rarely going to want to go to the same movies or concerts. On the other hand, I'm trying to figure out what our best case scenario is going to be in terms of time spent together. So far I've got sex, happy hour, and home games at the ballpark. While all of these things are very nice, they can't be the sum total of what we do together.
I have had 3 girlfriends before of greater significance than mere flings, and all of them have had large overlapping areas of hobby/culture interest with me, so I'm sort of out of my element here.
TL;DR: | how do you have a relationship if you like each other but have none of the same hobbies and like none of the same shows, movies, music, or books |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22/F] with my BF [23/M] 9 months, should I just tell him I love him?
POST: I [F23] have been my boyfriend [M23] for over 9 months now. Things are going well, and he has recently invited me over for the holidays.
At the beginning of relationship he told me he has never told any of his exs he loved them. The only time he felt like he loved a girl was after they broke up from a 5 month relationship. He has warned me it may take a long time for him to say it, because he wants to be sure.
I'm not trying to put a timeline on it but it's been 9 months... I have been sure I love him for awhile now. While, he constantly assures me that he likes me and feels that I have been the best girlfriend for him, I don't feel that he loves me. I feel really discouraged and anxious. I feel like at this point I should just tell him how I feel... At the same time, he is the type to feel pressured. I don't want him to say it back and for it to be disingenuous?
I feel like by 9 months, you either know it or you don't? It's not a deal breaker to me if he doesn't say it back immediately, I don't know how long I should wait before giving up.
TL;DR: | Been dating my boyfriend for 9 months, yet to exchange I love you. Should I just say it? How long is waiting for too long? |
SUBREDDIT: r/dating_advice
TITLE: What am I doing wrong (F, 28)?
POST: Hi reddit people! I thought asking your advice would have been a good idea as I am a bit lost.
I'm a 28 year old girl. I'm very independent, I work, I have a lot of hobbies and loads of friends. According to the people who know me, I'm nice to talk to and fun. I am average looking, nothing amazing and nothing too bad (I think...) and I don't usually have problems attracting guys.
Now, I've been on a couple of long relationships in my life, last one was seven years long and I ended it two years ago for a lot of personal issues that I won't be able to explain here. However, since then, it's been pretty much a disaster. I've dated, and dated, and dated a lot of guys and they all seem the same. They are happy to spend some time with me and definitely happy to be my friends with benefits but no one wants to really get involved. We go out on a few dates and then everything ends abruptly. I've been ghosted and treated like shit for no reason - people close to me know the whole stories and they all agree I haven't done anything wrong. I'm not clingy, I'm respectful, despite my insecurities I try and take things slowly.
This whole dating mess reflects on me really badly, I get hurt every single time. I can't help but thinking that it's my fault, and I've done something wrong. Plus now, after a few bad experiences, I start feeling I'm kind of "cursed" and if someone asks me out I get extremely nervous, which is so not me. I really don't know what to do to break this pattern. Am I giving too much too early, should I tell the guys I go out with that I don't want "casual" fun, what should I do?
TL;DR: | My dating life is a mess and all the guys I go out with disappear after a few dates. What am I doing wrong? |
SUBREDDIT: r/legaladvice
TITLE: [UK] I don't think I've passed my 2nd year at Uni. Contract for new flat says I must be a student to live there, but I don't think I will be...does this negate it?
POST: I have just finished my second year at university in another city, and I have some exams this week I need to pass in order to pass the year and progress on to my third and final year. Due to various unforseen circumstances this year I don't think I'm going to have even a slight chance of passing one of these exams, and will therefore fail my second year.
If I do fail the exams this week I can resit them in January, but doing so will require me to postpone my third year until September of next year. Due to this, I won't be needing to move back to the city my university is in next month, as I'll have no reason to be there.
I have signed a contract on a flat to live in from Sept 2013-Aug 2014, but I obviously don't need it if I don't need to be in that city. The contract says
> "IT IS HEREBY AGREED AND DECLARED as follows:
The Tenant is pursuing or intends within three months to pursue a course of study at an education
institution."
Will I still count as pursuing a course of study if I'm basically having a year out, but still technically a student there as I'll be going back next September (hopefully)? If I don't count as a student, is this an out for the contract, and if so will there be repercussions? If I do, am I just going to have to move into the flat anyway and try and get a job for the next year to pay for it? (I won't get the student loans if I'm not at uni for the year).
Sorry this was a bit all over the place.
TL;DR: | Don't think I've made it into my next year of uni, can I get out of the contract on my flat? |
SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: I [F26] don't know how to deal with my workplace bully [F23].
POST: About a year ago a girl that I work with tried to have me fired from my job. On paper this girl ought to be my best friend, and I thought we would socialise outside of work; but she made it clear very quickly that she didn't like me, she wouldn't say hello to me and would only give 1 word when I asked her questions or tried to get to know her. I love to bake, but she won't ever eat anything that I bring in, and she will make a point about how good other colleagues baking is. Everyone else would tell me how nice she is, and I would often see her talking in a very animated manner to others.
Things got worse a year ago when she tried, and nearly succeeded in having me fired. I had a video on my phone (not rude, violent, explicit etc) but of something that I shouldn't. she saw me show it to our manager who thought it was funny. Instead of talking to me and telling me I should probably deleted it, that afternoon she went straight above our line management to the Head of Operations. I had hearings and meetings and I, and most likely she, was expecting me to lose my job.
For the last year I have kept my face and not let on that I know what she did to me and I still manage to say hello to her but it leaves me physically shaking. I'm incredibly insecure and fake my confidence completely and I hate that she has made me feel like this.
I have never confronted her about it, or told her that I know it was her. My boyfriend has told me that she is jealous of me, well there's nothing about me to be jealous of and that doesn't help me deal with how this has left me feeling. I really don't know how to move forward from this situation.
TL;DR: | a girl at work tried to get me fired and has gone out of her way to make me feel shit about myself. |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: Online harassment advice
POST: This has been going on for over a year now and it's reached ridiculous levels.
Story goes like this: About a year and a quarter ago, I joined a gaming community, all was well. I ended up doing well, got on with the owner, ended up in a position of responsibility and all was well. Over time, the community decided they didn't like me and started causing trouble with me, eventually leading to attacks regarding my personal life and clearly making me emotionally uncomfortable. After it got too much, I left and went about my own life and tried to seperate myself as far as possible from them. Apart from a few little things, it eventually faded off, for the most part.
Then, today, they decided to come and bother me again. This consisted of joining my Teamspeak server (which, admittedly, is public, and I like it being public so people can join easily). Fortunately with a heads-up from a friend in the community, I was able to make my channel private. Following on from the previous episodes with them, me and the 5 friends I was talking/gaming with just decided to ignore them.
In the mean time, they constantly poked, whispered, and otherwise tried to cause a nuisance, including using photoshopped pictures of me for no other reason than to annoy and belittle me. We knew full well if we engaged them, the situation would get worse and they'd just keep coming back.
Now, I'm tempted to let them slide, but if they do come back again, despite the fact we gave them no attention, I'm not eager to put up with it again. I could just change my Teamspeak IP, but they've found my Facebook again and are bothering me through Steam.
So, I'm here asking for advice, **what should I do?**
My initial reading suggests I need to clearly, evidently, and through recordings tell them basically to leave me alone, call it quits and be done with. From then on, I'm in the right to persue stopping them by contacting their ISPs or the police.
Has anyone got some input? I really don't want this hassle, I just want to be able to get on with my own life without a load of immature idiots constantly bothering me and dragging me down.
TL;DR: | Idiots I fell out with still bothering me a year and a quarter later, don't want to just keep letting it slide, what are my options? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU: By Letting My Dog Sleep Between My Legs And Farting
POST: So i want to start of by saying, typically when i sleep, i lay on my stomach, when i sleep like this,my dog sleeps between my legs. He usually puts his head just above my knee on my leg. He loves this spot as it is directly in front of my window ac, and being a husky he loves it.
So today i had some homemade extra spicy tacos. They kind of gave me some sever gas. So i have been farting all night. When i went to lay down he came in like normal, and laid down between my legs. After about 5-10 minutes he was sleeping, when i felt it coming. I tried to hold it in, and let is disperse on its own but it wasn't going to go that way. As i shifted my leg, i let one rip, it was loud. It scared my dog, as he was jumping up and freaking out, his paws stomped my bag, at which point i rolled around. As i rolled around from the pain in my balls, i knocked my dog off the bed with my leg.
Sorry for grammar and spelling will fix as i notice
TL;DR: | Dog sleeps between my legs, taco farts startled dog, as he is freaking, accidentally bags me, i rolled over, my leg knocks dog of the bed. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22 F] and socially challenged/insecure guys who befriend me and then our friendship dies? Am I a "Nice girl" for the "Nice guys".
POST: First and foremost, there is nothing wrong with being nice, I am nice to everyone I meet and treat everyone equally. I think socially awkward guys are great people to befriend and although they can be a bit weird sometimes a lot of them are lots of fun. The problem is that the friendships with these guys doesn't last long.
In the experiences that I have had these are the things that happen:
I will meet them and initially they seem like regular confident people, and they are always very courteous. However over time they will begin to spill all their insecurities to me and their failed socializations and they always say that I make them feel at ease.
This makes me feel a bit like a shrink instead of a friend and then eventually they always confess a romantic interest.
I always say no and although they don't always persist, our friendship becomes ruined. They always say they though I was interested too because I am "nice and bubbly" around them.
In other situations it is obvious from the start of the friendship that they like me because they become extremely clingy to the point that I am unable to see past their attachment and end the friendship myself.
Do guys really confuse kindness with romantic interest?
TL;DR: | Weird" guys always befriend me and cling to our friendship and then ask me out, which kills our friendship. Does kindness=flirtation? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How to stop my girlfriends ex from using the internet against us?
POST: So my girlfriend has started to get weird texts and phone calls from alot of people she dosn't even know. They all said that they saw a post on 4chan from someone claiming she was a "cheating liar and needs to be punished". I know exactly who the guy is that posted it, but how do I go about getting him to stop or getting him back for that? It's just cowardly of him to use other people to bully up on her for no reason other than jealousy. Thankfully, one of the 4chan-ers from Tennessee called my girlfriend and warned us in the first place about the post, so if he sees this (I wish) I really would want to thank him.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend's ex is jelly, got mad, and is using 4chan to bully us. What should we do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Screwing things up for me [21/F] and bf [23/m]
POST: Where to begin...
My boyfriend and I are both motivated individuals that intend to pursue our education and both go to graduate school. However, we now know that we are going to separate schools that are very far away from one another. I have poked and prodded him about and his main sentiments are just ignore it until the last moment and then just say "uh.. see ya" when we both leave. And when I try to discuss further he just ignores me and waves it off. This is very annoying because I feel so strongly for him and at certain points felt like he was the one saw a future with him etc.
Except, I probably don't love him as much as I once thought because I almost cheated on him... or at least thought I had. I went out with friends and guy I had never met was there who I considered to be a very interesting person. Night progresses and I black out and just wake up next to him on a couch (snuggling) at a mutual friends house. My mind thinks we had to have done something, if just kiss. So I leave without saying a word to anyone.
Go a couple of weeks believing I cheated on my boyfriend, but just kinda ignoring it. I asked my friends if I had done anything embarrassing while BOD, but they said no. Go out again recently with same friends and he is there, end up asking if things had progressed while I was black out and he says no. But I am not happy to learn this, if anything I am disappointed. So, I have now developed a huge crush on this guy I barely know and am definitely emotionally cheating on my bf. This is frustrating because now I am in turmoil because I feel like I am losing someone I was so in love with, and I feel like I should break up with him now instead of waiting, but I am so sad and confused.
I think I already know the answer, but any advice would be greatly appreciated or if you could tell me how bad of a person I am for my actions.
TL;DR: | In a situation where breaking up with my bf is inevitable, ended up emotionally cheating on him, now my body is in a fit of emotional turmoil. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18 M] with my Girlfriend [20F] 2 years, Odd absence of conflict
POST: Okay, so we have been together for two years, as said in the title, and we never fight. The closest thing that we have had to a fight, is one night she came to my place after spending the day together, though I wanted to spend sometime by myself just to relax, without asking me. We didn't really argue, we just talked about it calmly. That was the closest thing we have had to a fight. We also both have fairly the same mind set on most things, and I can't think of a time that we have ever argued.
TL;DR: | So my question is, is it weird, wrong, or bad that we don't fight or argue with one another? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [15F] with my Boyfriend [16 M] of a year, I'm really confused and extremely regretful
POST: Last December I cheated with my boyfriend by letting a guy masturbate to me on webcam with me participating. Yes he's in Texas (the friend whom participated and I'm in NY) and yes he's never done anything like that with me before and I've never done anything like this ever before also, but I still feel horrible about it.
It just started with regular talking and it ended with me agreeing to let him watch me without clothes and masturbate. I felt really bad that day and found an outlet with him when my bf was busy. (I'm not excusing my actions, just giving more background info)
The guilt of it has been killing me. I feel so bad for doing this to him. I always forget about it until my friend talks to me and I remember the situation all over again. I never intend to do anything like this ever again and I've been planning to come clean and hope he doesn't think too bad of me.
I feel like for 2 teenagers, our relationship is relatively nice. We listen to each other, are functional, and have been very, very happy. I just want some advice on what I should do so I don't completely mess it up.
(And yes I know we're young. That just makes me feel even worst. My first relationship ever and I messed it up. Please give helpful answers)
TL;DR: | I let someone else masturbate to me and and am extremely regretful about it. Need advice on what I should do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Is it weird for Me [20F] to have feelings for someone 10 years older than me? [30M]
POST: I met somebody in August and have really clicked with him. I genuinely enjoy hanging around with him, I like talking with him, and he listens to me (etc.).
We flirt a lot and I'm pretty sure he's interested, but I'm so shy and nervous I don't really know how to proceed and/or if I even should.
I'm worried that people will think the age difference is weird and/or creepy (I've heard my mother say in passing that 10 years was 'a little too much'), and to top it off, he's almost a foot and a half taller than I am (He's 6'7, I'm 5'2), possibly furthering the 'creep illusion'.
There are many other things I want to think about before I make a decision on whether or not to/how to make a move, but this is one of the most pressing for me, at least currently.
TL;DR: | I am a short girl and I have a crush on a tall guy 10 years older than me. Worried about pursuing it for fear of people thinking the age difference is 'too much' or 'creepy' |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [24M] dated a friend [24F] briefly, and decided to be friends. She responds to all of my messages, but briefly / not full-heartedly.
POST: The title says most of it. I [24M] dated a friend [24F] for 3 weeks. The morning after having sex for the first time, and talking about exclusivity, she told me she doesn't want to be having sex, or to be in a relationship. we should just be friends. she remained pretty warm and kind hearted to me for a few days after.
I was hurt, and got distant. I tried to talk to her about things a week later, a fight broke out. We apologized, and became friends again. she told me she's not mad at me and appreciates 1) that I apologized 2) that we opened up to each other. However, she responds to all of my messages, but only briefly and not full-heartedly.
Wtf do I do? I just want to be friends. I've done nothing wrong to her, and we've shared some good times. I don't get.
Should i try to just meet up with her in person?
TL;DR: | dated briefly, decided to be friends, now she barely talks to me. what do i do? should i try to meet in person? |
SUBREDDIT: r/running
TITLE: Knee problem
POST: I went from never having done any running to running 140 km (according to runkeeper) within 3 weeks, culminating in a half marathon. I realise this is against the recommendations of any sensible training plan, and I found out why.
By the third week of training, I'd noticed after training that my left knee got a bit sore after a run, but after the half marathon, I could hardly move my left knee at all, and it took much longer to recover. After a week of rest it felt ok, but I went to the doctor to check that I wouldn't get any lasting damage if I started running again. He said it was just overuse, and if it felt ok, it probably was. He also said it might be a problem with footwear, but I have a new pair of running shoes supposedly cutting edge, high tech materials and 'adaptive fit' and whatnot. They feel like the fit perfectly well, I don't want to waste money on a new pair unless I know they're the problem.
I gave it one more week of rest to be safe, but then after running 3k, my knees were already sore again. So what should I do? give it more rest still and hope it works out? get a second opinion from another doctor? Buy one of those knee support things? buy new shoes?
TL;DR: | ran a lot in short time, knee got sore. Is ok after rest, but comes back almost instantly when I run again |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: What should I (34 M) do about signs of unavailability in otherwise-fun, two-month relationship (32 F)?
POST: I've been seeing a girl for a little over two months now and have been getting mixed signals. I'm getting both red flags about her history (and future) of unavailability as well as great indicators of her really liking me.
On the one hand, she has started introducing me to some family and friends, and always is interested in making plans and projects together, etc. We have great dates, deep conversations, and she's not seeing anyone else. On the other hand, she's been very open about her past of ending her relationships by uprooting/moving, broken engagement, being in AA, having anxiety and depression, currently not being happy at work, wanting to change careers or even countries, etc.
She says she thinks putting down roots will make her happy, yet she's always just uprooted/ran away in her past. Should I save myself the heartache and break up now, or ride it out and give her the benefit of the doubt?
TL;DR: | New relationship is fun now. She thinks she might want to settle down but has a long history of uprooting which makes me nervous. Should I ride it out or call it off? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: Was delivered a tank of home heating oil, was left bill in someone else's name. What should I do?
POST: Just bought a house. Was delivered a tank of home heating oil, was left bill in the previous owner's name.
I'm kinda curious here I stand.
The elderly couple that sold the house to us were amazing as they left us a lawn mower, hedge trimmer, wheel barrow, gas can, garden tools, ladders hose attachments for gutters... etc. Buncha great stuff a new home owner would need, and we're super thankful so I don't want to eff them over.
I'm thinking calling the oil company and thanking them for the free oil, then explain what happened. We were actually considering going with this oil company as they solicited along with many other heating companies, so they know who we are.
Hypothetically, couldn't I just say "eff off" I didn't order this, and they'd just give me the oil or have to pump it out and bill us for what we didn't use? lol
Another scenario would be going with this oil company and work out a deal due to the circumstance.
This is more incentive to switch to partial solar. Also, the likelihood of me subscribing to this oil company is going to be based on how they handle this, I guess.
Any advice where I stand would be helpful. Gonna call them tomorrow morning, but I'm kinda curious where I stand. Any help advice would be nice.
TL;DR: | Was a delivered a tank of heating oil billed to someone else's name. Should I try to be a dick and try to get it for free because I didn't order it. Curious where I stand. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by returning 2DS systems to Walmart.
POST: Today I fucked up when I tried to return some 2DS systems to Walmart.
It all started with this limited edition green 2DS.
I saw it. I wanted it. I told my friend about it and they wanted them too.
I saved up some extra dollars to be able to afford this.
Lo and behold a great sale comes upon Target and these suckers go on sale for $99 a piece. I have a target card so I go and order 3 (max limit) twice for me and all my friends. Put it on target credit card since I always pay it in full every month
They would all pay me a little extra for my effort and everyone gets what they want.
Then targets cancels my order and says they aren't stocking this green color anymore.
My friends tell me they only want green ones so I try to fix it.
I go to Target and get them to price check the blue ones to $99 and then order the green ones from Walmart for full price.
I'll just say they sent the wrong color, return the blue ones to Walmart and then everything will be great.
WRONG.
Apparently I'm extraordinarily not smart and they track the serials on these things by store and every other store knows what store they came from.
The lady behind the desk is pissed off I'm wasting her time and tells me I can't return them. Figured as much when tiny tickets started spouting out of the printer when she scanned the things.
Security comes up to the Walmart return desk and tells me I should probably just leave and not come back.
Got tsk'd out of the ghetto Walmart I went to because I figured they weren't too concerned with weird returns.
Now I have a bunch of 2DS that I paid too much for or no one wants with the pay off date for my card coming up. I'm so stupid.
TL;DR: | Tried to trick Walmart into returning 2DS systems, Walmart tapped its acrylic nails in disappointment and told me to fuck off. |
SUBREDDIT: r/weddingplanning
TITLE: FMIL and money
POST: Hello everybody,
I have read that when you are planning the wedding, you should ask your families if they are willing to contribute. I asked my family and they are helping with the invitations and my stepdad paid for the dress.
When we came over to my FH family, FMIL said congratulations on the engagement, but didn't really told us about "let us know if you want us to help". So I told my FH that helping us with a cake would be nice. She hesitated, but said.. "ok.. I need to research into the cakes, which one do you like..." etc. She kind of hesitated. Then a month later she told my FH that they want to help us for our honeymoon and give us $3K so we have a nice one.
Summer came and went, and she never talked to either of us about the cake or about the honeymoon. Silence. I am the one planning everything, so my FH is not really involved much, he cares about certain things, but doesn't really bother about appointments, phone calls to vendors, researching into stuff.
So what do I do? Do I just wait? My stepdad was very straightforward with the money, saying "ok, send me dress pictures, and send me the price", he sent me the money right away.. With her.. I don't even know. What makes it harder is that we moved to another state and usually just text/call. We still have the wedding back there. My fiance is not the closest to her.. their relationships are kind of awkward.
TL;DR: | We talked to FMIL about the cake, she said ok, then offered to pay for honeymoon, and hasn't mentioned it since. How do we nicely remind her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by chasing a dwarf in Asda
POST: Obligatory "not today, blah blah blah", but anyway here goes. The title is pretty self explanatory.
When I was about 3 years old, my mother took my me shopping to Asda (UK Walmart). I was always looking to play with people in my young age and I found a kid in the store to play with so I started to run towards him. However, when I ran to play with my new friend a horrifying revelation was made.
The "kid" was not in fact a kid but instead, was a male dwarf. From this, my father had to try and explain to me that his dwarf in his mid-30s was not in fact a new friend but a man that I wasn't allowed to play with while also trying to contain his laughter.
As you can imagine, the dwarf was probably quite scared, you know what with a hyperactive 3 year-old boy chasing him around Asda trying to play with him.
Looking back, we always laugh when the topic is brought up.
TL;DR: | When I was 3, I chased a dwarf around Asda (UK Walmart) thinking he was another kid to play with. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by thinking a guy was hitting on me at Tim Hortons
POST: This actually happened a while ago, but after sharing the story with friends and still cringing at the event months later, I think it is Reddit worthy. And maybe I can finally get some catharsis from the embarrassment I still feel.
So I was waiting for a flight at the airport in Montreal, and had some time to kill so I went to Tim Hortons to get some food. I ordered, took my receipt, and headed to the side to wait for my food to be ready. As I was standing there, this short sort of unattractive guy next to me looked over, and asked me "What's your number?" I immediately blushed, looked confused, and went "What?" I was thinking, wow he really got straight to the point. He repeated, sounding a bit more frustrated now, "What's your number?" At this point I was like man - he's persistent. I was sort of smiling awkwardly and blushing at this point, and thinking man are you serious. I was feeling kind of bad - I did NOT want to give this guy my number, but I also have a heart and didn't want to be rude. So I finally said "I'm sorry, I have a boyfriend." He looked away a bit confused, and I was like oh man this is going to be awkward now. A few seconds later he turned back and said "I meant the number on your receipt."
It turns out he wanted to know how far he was from getting his order. I internally face-palmed about 100 times. I had never felt so awkward standing next to someone in my life. Thankfully at that moment my order was called. I literally bolted past him completely avoiding eye contact, grabbed my food and ran out of there as fast I could.
TL;DR: | Thought a guy was asking for my number at Tim Hortons. Turns out he meant the order number on my receipt. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (25f) really want to believe him (30m) but th evidence is damning
POST: Might be long. I have been acquainted with this guy for years. Never knew him well. I recently became single, and around the same time he informed me he was single as well. We went on a couple dates, things were going well, didn't have any reason to be concerned... Until his "ex" girlfriend popped up on my "people you may know" section on Facebook. It was a picture of him and her at a wedding. Obviously curiosity got me and I stalked, finding pictures of them on a vacation two weeks ago for his birthday and pictures of them at a wedding not too far before that. Looking at the dates all of this happened after he told me they broke up. I texted him, confronting him on the situation, with a screen shot of her profile, asking for an explanation. A few minutes after the text she blocked me. Now he is saying all of this is a misunderstanding, that the birthday was pre planned, so he was obligated to go etc. He wants to call and explain himself. Is there any chance I'm over reacting? Any at all? Obviously logic is telling me cut and run, but there is a small part of me hoping maybe I'm in the wrong and he isn't a lying asshole.
TL;DR: | pretty sure I found his girlfriend on Facebook, he's saying it's a glitch in Facebook among other excuses, not sure if over reaction or proper reaction. Help. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18M] is frustrated with my GF[18F] because she is a terrible communicator.
POST: My SO of about 13 months is awful at communication. She rarely gets back to me when I text her, she never asks me to hang out, and we haven't even talked face to face since Thursday. The last time we even had time together alone was over three weeks ago. My friends always ask me how she's doing and how we're doing and i just don't know. To me I'm getting the feeling that she doesn't show any desire or interest in this relationship anymore. I'm not sure if she if she means to give me this impression but it just makes me feel terrible that she doesn't talk to me. I don't understand how or why she would feel cold towards me i've been a great boyfriend and i love her a lot. Please help.
TL;DR: | GF doesn't communicate well, gives me impression that she might be losing interest, and in general this makes me feel quite terrible. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [30 M] husband pretty much had an emotional affair and I [30 F] don't know how to deal
POST: I was recovering from a serious surgery when I found out my husband was talking to another woman (that he met out at a bar) for hours everyday behind my back. I felt like he screwed me over when I needed him the most, and to make matters worse stress brings on inflammation in my body (related to the surgery). Regardless, I was very hurt. This happened this past fall.
He stopped talking to her, but I'm not sure where it would have gone had he continued.
I am still having trouble dealing with this. I think I am going about it the wrong way, but I find myself talking to a guy almost as revenge (not for hours, but chatting on and off). He wants to hang out and I am debating it. I know reddit will sh*t on me for this.
Anyway my husband is going out of town for a week, and I'm not sure what he is up to. I asked to use his phone to text my friend a few days ago and he said "no". I definitely don't trust him, but I don't know if I am dealing with this all wrong, or if I should feel guilty for talking to someone.
TL;DR: | Reddit, should I feel 'bad/guilty' for talking to someone (nothing serious just making convo) and maybe meeting up to hang out with someone after my husband's emotional affair?! |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by suggesting my Latin class have an orgy
POST: It's 1996, I'm in my 6th grad Latin class taught my Mr. Melee (he pronounced it like Mealy, but come on, that's a kick ass last name). I had wanted to take latin ever since I began to read the Asterix and Obelisk graphic novels. For those of you that done' know, Asterix and Obelisk is set during the roman empire, it's fairly light hearted and follows around 2 celts, Asterix, a smaller guy and Obelisk, a huge rotund guy.
Anyways, every year, the different language groups all come together and put on a festival type thing showcasing the language and culture for the languages we were learning. In Asterix and Obelisk I had read a chapter where the Romans were throwing and orgy, which really was just a party where they got together, and ate bread and melted cheese. I'm a chunky white kid so I fucking love bread and cheese. Nobody else was making any suggestions so I raised my hand, Mr. Melee called my name and I said "Let's have an orgy!"
His eyes grew a little wide and most of the kids turned to look directly at me, some laughed out loud, I heard one of the older girls say something like "Oh, gross!" I had no idea what I did wrong, I thought that somehow all of my classmates hated bread and cheese. The teacher knew what I meant but still had a hard time getting the class quiet after that. One of the kids explained to me what the *other* meaning was and I flushed beet red and had my head down for the rest of the class. Easily one of the more embarrassing moments of my life, I felt like people thought that I wanted to have sex with everybody in the classroom.
TL;DR: | 6th grade latin class, for language festival I suggested having an orgy, meaning a traditional Roman party, at the time had no idea it also referred to sex with everybody in the room. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: How can I help out my sister? She wants to go to university for creative writing and does not see that this would be a bad idea.
POST: Her logic is that she doesn't want to end up 'in a boring desk job'. I've been trying to convince her that if she takes creative writing, odds are she will either end up with no job, or a soul crushing service job.
I've also been trying to get her to consider taking writing as a minor and majoring in something more useful like business. One of the **main issues** though is there aren't really any academic subjects that she excels in or is particularly passionate about, so choosing a 'useful' major, I imagine, seems either daunting or depressing.
What can I do to help her out/what can I suggest? I feel like if she pursues this, she will be making a mistake that follows her through her whole life.
Obviously I'm not saying that one shouldn't follow their dreams or do what they like, but I think it's reasonable to have back-up skills to use to, you know, feed yourself.
TL;DR: | Sister wants to major in creative writing. What might I tell her to convince her that this might be a bad idea? What alternatives might there be for her? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm [30/M] considering breakup up with my girlfriend [25/F] who I've lived with for three years while grieving the loss of my mom. I don't know if I can trust my emotions right now.
POST: Basically my girlfriend has always needed to lean more on me than I have on her. Typically this is in the form of complaining about certain events in the day or worries/concerns about the future or past and family issues (her mom is narcissistic and puts her younger sister against her). She's more external than I am with her emotions and is a little insecure. I, on the other hand, am more withdrawn and can typically navigate through my own stuff. I haven't felt like she's understood me for a while now, but she argues why that's not true when I bring it up. This is how things have been for a while with us..
Last month my mom passed away from aggressive cancer in her kidney, liver, spinal fluid, and bone marrow. I was with her holding her hand when she passed away. Now obviously this experience has had a pretty big hold on me. During this time, our relationship's very structure has been flipped upside down in that I really need support and don't feel like my girlfriend understands me well enough to get the support I need. She's been resistant to give me space because she's "not getting what she needs" in the form of my time, attention, and affection. I think that this situation has opened my eyes to the very real possibility that I'm not getting what I need and I might not have been getting that for a long time.
I know I was rather short with the details, it's sort of hard to jot everything down right now. Do you guys think I can trust myself and my jump to that conclusion right now given my emotional state? Feel free to ask any questions if you have them. Thanks for reading.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend needs a lot of support I can't provide right now due to grieving my mom's death. Can I trust my emotions right now?? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I(25F) think my bf(26M) settled for me?
POST: We've been together for almost 2 years which makes me think that if he had settled he wouldn't have stuck around for so long. Here's some stuff from the last 3 months that makes me think that he might love me but not be "in love" with me anymore.
He doesn't display any casual physical affection like holding my hand, brushing my hair, or stroking/kissing my face (unless he wants to have sex).
He says "I love you" back to me when I say it but otherwise I haven't heard him say it first in a long time.
He'll make last minute plans (if his friends haven't called him up) and if they do while he's hanging out with me, he'll have them come meet us. The last time we went out with his friends, a random guy started to hit on me while I was ordering a drink at the bar. He just sat back, watched, and thought it was funny.
In the last month he's started to say some kind of hurtful things. I'm fairly tall and clumsy. I've been this way since way before I even met him so it's not anything new or unexpected.
some examples: -I plugged my phone to charge on his desk and knocked his pencil cup with my elbow when I turned around. I didn't make a mess or break anything but when he came over he gave me a look and said "why aren't you ever careful with anything?"
He also said "you look like a drunk clown when you walk."
TL;DR: | I think my bf is just keeping me around because it's better than being alone/good enough for now. What are some signs to know if we can still work things out or if it's completely over? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: (22 F) I'm pregnant and I think my boyfriend (25 m) may break up with me.
POST: We've been together for over 3 years, and have had our ups and downs. Last night he told me he didn't know if he wanted to be with me anymore, and that he needed some time to figure it out.
I'm 2 months pregnant, and haven't told him yet. (I have irregular periods and haven't had any morning sickness, and not a lot of weight gain so he has no reason to suspect that I'm pregnant.) I'm afraid that if I tell him now, he'll either think I'm doing this to make him stay with me, or that he'll just stay with me for the baby even if he doesn't want to.
TL;DR: | boyfriend of 3 years doesn't know if he still wants to be with me. 2 months pregnant and he doesn't know. I'm now stuck in a bad situation. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Teenager trying to find a job, not working out. Help me out?
POST: I'm 17, and I live in Myrtle Beach, SC, so I essentially live in a tourist trap where almost everywhere only hires during the big holiday seasons, and those jobs are instantly taken up by family/friends of the managers.
Right before Summer last year, I went out and applied at 20+ places, called and checked up on all those applications at least twice, politely asked to talk to the manager, introduced myself, yada yada. I never got one call back. I always have references, hell, my main reference is a retired Colonel from the Army.
I really need a job, since I'm a junior in High School, and I need to save up $5000 to buy an instrument (euphonium) before I graduate high school, as I plan on joining a military band.
TL;DR: | I live in a tourist trap city, everywhere I look only hires friends/family, I have no friends/family in retail/service industry, need money for a very expensive instrument. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Boyfriend (25M) and I (23F) broke up over alcohol
POST: Boyfriend and I have been together almost 2 years and lived together about 6 months. He told me he was uncomfortable about alcohol and would rather me not drink around him. Ok so i did that, also he said I can't have alcohol in our home. He flipped the script a few weeks ago saying i now can't go out and be around other men and alcohol (whether i went out with them, or there were men around period) without him. Matter of fact i can't be around guys without him period, shouldn't be hanging around guys regardless even if it is just classmates together or a group outing. Im a med student by the way. So now i can't go out without him, and if I'm with him i can't drink..hows that a compromise? So the other day i asked if i could at least drink at home so ill be safe and ill at least be with him. He flipped out and said I'm disrespectful and don't care about his feelings and I'm childish and selfish.
We've had other problems before, and he just isn't a good boyfriend when it comes to giving me attention or affection so this isn't our first big blowout or anything. I now packed all my stuff up and moved back home. Am i wrong for this? I don't think i should have to live with all of those rules when i don't do anything to blatantly disrespect the relationship. Im not a party girl at all, i don't have time to be, but its nice to get out once in a while.
TL;DR: | Boyfriend and I broke up because he says i don't respect his opinions and I need to do what he says to make the relationship work |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: My[18/m] girlfriend[19/f] is great but we seem to have very different interests.
POST: My girlfriend is really nice and helpful but we don't seem to have a lot of common interests. She spends most of her time involved with the LGBT Center at our university. I support gays being able to marry and stuff but I don't care to be that involved. When she isn't doing things in the center, she spends time with her friends from there. Because of this, quite a few conversations revolve around the LGBT stuff. I know I shouldn't feel this way but I feel like she should want to spend more time with me since I want to be with her so much.
When I'm with her, she's all that I can think about but when we're apart and she's doing stuff with the center I feel kind of neglected. I think I may be too needy.
She also doesn't have a very similar sense of humor. I can still get her to laugh but a lot of my jokes, she doesn't get or approve.
I feel like I have to sensor myself around her. By being involved with the center, she is very keen on not insulting a group of people. She will get on to me if I say "that's gay" or "that's retarded". She's also started saying "you people" instead of "you guys" because it's not fair to women. It's not that I'm insensitive to these groups of people but they're part of the common vernacular.
I think about other women more than I think is normal. I don't try to but I just do.
As a freshman I met her pretty early on in the year so really most of my friends were her friends first. This creates a problem in that, if we breakup, I may lose almost all of my friends.
I think I'm probably averagely attractive and one of my fears is that I won't find someone and if I do, she won't be as great and won't love me as much as she does.
She's great and makes me really happy when I'm with her but I feel like she's not a great fit for me I guess. What should I do? Should I break up with her?
TL;DR: | My girlfriend is great but she spends a lot of her time in an organization that I don't care to become involved with and I feel neglected that she doesn't want to spend time with me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Dear 17-25 year olds of reddit, what common misconceptions about your generation that older folks have piss you off?
POST: * we were born wrapped in bubble wrap.
I remember in more than one occasion having bb gun battles with my friends and other kids. Not wearing helmets, knee-pads, etc.
Going to tell my parents how I got hurt and them telling me "you were playing, don't complain"
* MTV used to be good.
MTV has always sucked, the majority of music on MTV has always sucked. Stop it. Don't even argue it. MTV has always played 1-2 good clips once in a while that are good, the rest are a huge circlejerk.
* We have no real person interaction
No, in fact I am willing to argue that we had the same..and let's not forget that we are in fact one of the first age group to have gowned up considering condoms a standard for sex. So sex with multiple partners has a really low chance of any negative consequences.
TL;DR: | if you're a 30+ person claiming that you "had it better", come here to prove it to me. I am willing to bet you're a shelterd anti-social person. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [25/M] My girlfriend [25/F] of 7 years broke up with me 2 months ago and I'm still heart broken. Should we be friends?
POST: About 2 months ago my girlfriend of 7 years broke up with me after falling in love with her coworker whom of which I dont think she likes after all. Although im still heart broken talking to her actually does help me out and lifts my spirit a bit but the thing is that, I already accepted that there is no relationship between us. But I don't want her to gain and capitalize off of us still talking and having conversations. More background information about us: We were together every since high school. 7 years. So this is really like my best friend who I love but didn't really love me back. How should I handle this situation?
TL;DR: | Continue being her friend although it makes me feel better or just drop the situation so she want gain anything out of it and just deal with the heart-ache? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [28F] want to get to know a man [30] but don't know how - ok to use facebook?
POST: I am 28 f and have a crush on a 30 m. We do not know each other but during my recent (January) clinical training at the hospital he works I occasionally saw him and sometimes worked the same operating room (2 years ago in a group setting we said hi to each other and shook hands, that was it, our only face to face interaction).
During an operation I was observing, a nurse came up to me and told me that if I was looking for a future partner he's the man to go for - I had noticed him and wondered so that was just further affirmation.
At the time I was in a complicated short lived thing with a guy that was breaking up so I wasn't exactly thinking about making any advances. But am now completely rid of that.
As I am no longer doing my training how can I get closer to this possible mr. right. We do not belong to the same group of friends, I am not expecting to see him or run into him anywhere out and about or at a bar/club.
My only idea involves using Facebook and sending him a message, introduce myself and maybe ask him on a date of sorts - but I do not know if that's considered tacky or somehow not acceptable, I don't want to come off as a nutter/stalker/sth bad. (I do realize it depends on people themselves how they react and we are all different…)
So my question: in your opininon is it acceptable, or worth the try for a girl… woman(?) to approach a man, that she hardly knows, on Facebook with the intentions of it possibly leading to a date?
Do you have other suggestions?
TL;DR: | I have a crush on a man that I hardly know, is it okay to use facebook to contact him to get to know him? Your thoughts? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Reddit, what's something a doctor has done that has really pissed you off?
POST: My story is I had my doctor accusing me of absuing me pain medication after a major surgery. I had a neurosurgery so I had to get pain medication quite often and I had difficulties healing and since I'm under 18 doctors are super hesitant to prescribe pain medicine. I had a signed contract with this doctor that I wouldn't goto another doctor for pain medication or abuse my pills. Well, she thought I was selling me pills because I was going through them so fast but truth is I HONESTLY needed them. I'm still healing, still going through it, the surgery didn't fix the problem, just to add. Anyways, I agreed to take a drug test because I had nothing to hide. My doctor wanted to make sure the medication was in my system. She made a huge deal about trust and how serious the issue is. I took the drug [urine] test. I came back about a week later for the results and she informs me my urine got spilled so there were no results.
She then refused to see me again.
TL;DR: | My doctor thought I was absuing pils, I took a drug test to prove I wasn't, she spilled my urine and then refused to see me again. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [26/M] just broke up with my LDR [22/F] gf of six months... I don't know whether to talk to her
POST: Her: A recent graduate from a nursing school. She lives in Brazil and has zero interest in moving to the US. On a gap year before starting a masters in nursing, hopes to work in geriatrics.
Me: A returning student applying to transfer to four year schools from community college. I want to be a researching math professor. I'm extremely ambitious and hard working when it comes to academics. It's my top priority and I've already sacrificed a lot just to have a shot at the places I'm applying to. I have family in Brazil.
I met her once in Brazil when I was visiting several years ago. We started talking about seven months ago, quickly realized we really liked each other, started chatting all day and eventually skyping, and feelings developed. The other day she told me she loved me, which no girl has ever said to me before. However, there's really no long term plan. Moving to Brazil would almost certainly kill my career dreams and moving to the US is also too big a sacrifice for her to make. I'm not ok with this, especially since at the moment we are both on pretty limited incomes so visiting would be extremely difficult.
I told her I wasn't ok with being in a LDR with no plan. Twice we went for the 'let's be friends' option and it really didn't work out. We probably discussed how this wasn't working for me every day for the past two weeks. Last night I told her I thought we shouldn't talk anymore. She said she didn't agree but understood and respected the choice.
Today I feel just terrible. I miss her so much. She really is my best friend and I'm so excited when I get a message from her or a little video blog, or I send her one, or we talk by skype. She messaged me saying this was a terrible idea and she didn't want to give up on us. I'm really new to relationships and while this might seem like something a 26 year old guy should know I'm not really sure what to do or how to feel about it. It seems so cruel to just ignore her, but am I right in thinking I should?
TL;DR: | Broke up with long distance love interest, but should I talk to her even though she really just wants to right the ship? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My mom [49F] says I [24M] cannot join in on family vacation
POST: My mom [49F], dad [45M], brother [16M], and sister [12F] are taking a week long vacation to the mountains in a few weeks. I [24 M] am not invited. I live in another state, but will be visiting back home while they will be on vacation. A few months ago when they mentioned planning the trip they said I could join them, but now mom says I'm not invited because they would have to get a second hotel room and I am too old for family vacations; I have had my share and now it is my siblings' turns.
I feel hurt because they would rather go without me. My friends all vacation with their families still. They are implying that because of my age we are less apt to enjoy each other's company. I do not feel that way. I just feel like my family would rather be without me. As far as getting another hotel room, I slept on the floor in a sleeping bag on my last vacation so that would not bother me. Should I tell mom that it hurt my feelings or just get over it?
TL;DR: | family are taking a vacation and I'm not invited, it hurt my feelings but maybe I'm too sensitive. Should mention my feelings? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm [M21] too dependent on others
POST: So last year I joined the military and currently I'm stationed in Germany. I never knew until recently how dependent I was on having other people involved in my day-to-day life. By this, I don't mean friends and co-workers, because I've become adept at meeting new people and working with them. What I mean are people who are like family, people who I share a home with, and am involved with their life as much as they're involved in mine. While I don't consider this bad, it's just not something that isn't realistic given my current situation.
Growing up, my family (which consisted of my two brothers and mom) were very close and the relationships that I had in high-school and after were very close and I saw my girlfriend every day because we were (for the most part) neighbors. So now that I'm out in the world I don't have that same connection with anyone anymore. There are people I see every day but I don't have that same "familial" connection.
On top of that, even though I consider myself very self-motivated, I'm a homebody. If someone is going out and invite me or I can convince them to go out, I will. Most of the time, my friends just want to stay at home and play video games (this is also because I work a terrible schedule that conflicts with theirs.)
TL;DR: | I just don't feel at home and am extremely lonely because I am dependent on having other people in my life on a consistent basis. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Young divorcees of Reddit, what happened?
POST: **I know this isn't a super pointed question, but I was hoping some under-30 divorcees wouldn't mind sharing their experience going through a divorce at such a young age. What happened?**
In this Redditor's humble opinion, it seems disheartening to realize that two young couples I personally know (who've been married less than 5 years) are already divorced/filed for divorce. Personally, it creates such a sense of hopelessness that two people, who were once so in love, can't find that spark/settle their differences. Despite that sad notion, I still see so many of my facebook friends getting engaged and married at an alarming rate.
TL;DR: | Was wondering young divorcees experience going through a divorce at such a young age, yet still I see so many young people getting married. Feels hopeless.* |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (19/F) feel jealous of my SO's (18/M) new sex toy
POST: So, recently, after breaking up with my boyfriend of almost two years, I started talking a friend of mine and long story short, we are going to start dating next week (when he is here, long-distance relationship). We are pretty sexual, masturbating together a few times a day, and we haven't had sex before, next week will be the first time.
He is not a virgin neither am I. He lost it to a girl who treated him really bad and overall he says the sex sucked pretty bad. Yesterday, he got the toy he ordered online, along some other stuff he got for me, and naturally I watched him try it. He loved it so much, moaned so loudly and came within minutes. He couldn't talk for some time but when he did, he was saying how amazing it is, how it's better than the sex he had, that it felt tighter and a lot better, and stuff.
I really am glad that he enjoyed himself... But I felt really horrible. Not like I got cheated on, nothing like that. I just... felt not enough for him. I am tight, but I don't think it's comparable to a sex toy designed for the very same purpose. I fear that he will like it more than our sex and to be honest, I really don't feel like having sex with him when he is here.
What do?
TL;DR: | SO got a new fleshlight for himself, loved it so much, much more than his previous sexual experiences. Now I don't feel enough for him and feel really jealous. How to get over myself? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What is your closest encounter of getting caught with drugs?
POST: I'll start. I was a freshman in college and my boyfriend, who was a senior in high school, invited me to his prom. We took a limo with about 5 other couples and had liquor on the way to prom. The limo driver found out and confiscated it and we thought we were all going to be busted for MIP's. My boyfriend had about 5 Molly's on him. There were cops at prom so we thought we'd be questioned and searched there. We got out of the limo and nothing happened except having to shake the principal's hand while we had the Molly in the other. (We were ready to swallow the Molly in the case that we were questioned.)
This is my first post from a phone right before class, therefore sorry about grammar and everything else Reddit!
TL;DR: | Went to prom with my boyfriend, had drugs on us, thought we were going to be searched and question and only had to shake hands with the principals. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Have any of you ever gone from ready to completely take on the day to completely demotivated/demoralized after overhearing something at work?
POST: Been at the same job over a year now and no raise. Been thinking about asking for a while. Recently a lot more responsibility has been added to my plate(not including the vast amount that has accumulated over the year). Today I gathered up the nerve to go up and ask, but just before I go ask, I hear the boss coming out of the accountant's office ranting about how he doesn't give out raises for taking on more responsibility, and went off for a few minutes about the co-worker who asked without directly saying the persons name coupled in with some of those "well he can go work for such and such for minimum wage, see if he gets a raise there" type comments. Needless to say I just turned around and went back to my desk without asking. Now I am sitting here with absolutely no motivation to do anything, had I not heard what I had just heard from the boss, I probably wouldn't be nearly as demotivated and demoralized to do work as I am at the moment. I'm not sure what to do with myself now.
TL;DR: | went up to ask for raise, got shut down before even asking, now I'm demotivated/demoralized. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me 19F with my boyfriend 19M 8 months, I did something shitty in the early stages of our relationship and I feel guilty about it
POST: Hey eveyone! I've lurked on here before and now I'm in need of help. I had to change the ages just a bit so hopefully it wouldn't be noticeable to people in the situation. I know Im fairly young and there are so many other big issues couples are going through but I need advice.
In the beginning of our relationship I really liked my boyfriend and we rushed into a relationship after one date. A friend of mine started to develop feelings for me while I was in the relationship and so when we would hangout it would be like us going on dates. Me and the guy friend would cuddle at the end of the night and he tried to kiss me twice although I didn't let him. I would flirt with him a lot and I went on these "hangouts/dates" like 3 or 4 times.
I know what I did was wrong and I try to rationalize and say I'm young and that I didn't sleep or kiss anybody so technically it isn't cheating. What I did wasn't right and my boyfriend is perfect now and I can't help but feel so guilty. If I told him he would breakup with me and I don't want that-I just don't know what to do.
TL;DR: | I hungout with a friend and was flirty and cuddly with him during the beginning of my relationship with my current boyfriend. I feel real guilty and need advice! |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [24M] can't deal with the sories about my gf [26F] and her ex boyfriends and men she had bfore we met.
POST: Hey reddit. Again you're my last sanctuary. Throwaway bc my gf knows my reddit name.
TL;DR: | I can't handle stories of my gf of other men before we met and I don't know what to do. I feel lost and heartbroken. Please help. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Should I [25F] try to get back in touch with my ex [24M]? It's been a week but I am still devastated over it.
POST: It's been a week since we broke up. He basically stopped contacting me and closed off most of our usual ways of talking. I'm afraid to just call him. Should I even do it?
We were in a relationship for over a year. We had a loving relationship though we argued over sex (he wanted it too much, and he usually guilted me into it or threatened that he would watch his friend who's does webcamming instead) and him taking out his anger on me (verbally).
I miss him terribly. Even though I'm pretty sure he's happier without me around.
TL;DR: | Ex cut off all contact. It's been a week and I still want to get back together. Should I bother? If not, how can I get over this faster? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I'm (22f)Breaking up with my girlfriend (22f) of five years. Am I doing the right thing?
POST: My girlfriend and I have been together for five years. It hasn't been the easiest of relationships, but it's certainly had it's good times. During our five years of being together, I have made many mistakes including cheating on her, ignoring her for weeks at a time and just general shitty behaviour. However, I feel like I'm not all to blame for the relationship turning sour. For our whole relationship she has kept me hidden from her family and friends, she refuses to post pictures of the two of us to social media and has made it a rule that she can only spend one night a week with me. I've never pushed my girlfriend to tell her friends or family about me because I always assumed that when she was ready she would tell them and I don't believe it's my position to come between her and her family. I'm going to break up with her today, mainly out of guilt because I feel awful for treating her so badly. Apart of me feels as though breaking up with her is selfish, and it's not the right thing to do. I also feel that I deserve better than what she's offering me and that it's okay to want to leave the relationship. I'm very conflicted Reddit, and need your help to motivate me to do the right thing!
TL;DR: | girlfriend of five years refuses to tell her family and friends about me and I'm thinking of breaking up with her because of it. Am I doing the right thing? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My upstairs neighbours (Fs, early 20s) scare me (23F) at night and keep me awake regularly
POST: I live in a house that is informally divided up into 2 flats. I share the downstairs with a girl, and about 5 people live upstairs. I say it's informally divided because there's nothing preventing us from accessing their area (i.e just walk upstairs) or them from ours. We share a hall which my bedroom is off and a front door.
Anyway, every month or so one of these upstairs people (I'm assuming) gets really drunk and comes home after a night out and starts pounding on the front door, which is right beside my bedroom. The first time it happened I was really terrified as I didn't know who it was, just that there was someone trying very hard to get into my house by banging hard on the door in the middle of the night and fiddling with the keyhole. The only reason I now assume someone upstairs is doing it is because it keeps happening, and cos eventually someone comes along (from somewhere else outside) and lets them in - I assume another upstairs resident back later from her night out.
It happened last night and went on for 3 hours! It gets really scary being alone in my room and hearing someone basically about to break the door down. The reason I don't let them in is because firstly, I can't be sure if it is someone from upstairs. Secondly, whoever it is clearly sounds very drunk and aggressive. Thirdly, I'm just not comfortable opening the front door out onto the street myself in the middle of the night. I'm 5"3, there's no latch, and there was a murder five minutes from my house just two days ago.
I have told my landlady who has (according to her) spoken to them numerous times now based on my complaints. But nothing seems to have changed. I do consider calling the police but because the house is so informally divided I'm afraid they'll think I'm just wasting their time if it does turn out to be a reaident of upstairs. Who rings the police about a person trying to get into their own home? So I'm really not sure what to do about the situation. Any advice?
TL;DR: | a person I assume is my neighbour pounds on the front door and screams in the middle of the night. I'm scared, losing sleep, and unsure what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Redditors! Help! I'm on a coffee rush - how do you avoid a caffeine crash? Any tips?
POST: So I met a friend for coffee this morning. I was waiting in the wrong coffeeshop, so ended up downing my double espresso when I got the call. I'm not normally a big coffee drinker (that's probably obvious by nature of this post), but we ended up sitting there for about three hours, as various other friends joined and left. Also had a large slab of chocolate brownie. Guessing at about seven coffees. Suddenly noticed my legs jiggling and my heart pumping faster. Bought a ball pump; pumped up a basketball in about 45 seconds. Did my weekly grocery shopping in about ten minutes in the supermarket. Have zero concentration and need to get some work done - but fearing a sudden crash any minute... Any help out there? Anyone?
TL;DR: | Laughably low caffeine tolerance has left me a gibbering idiot. Help. Thankyouthankyouthankyou. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: [17/m] How do I restore closeness with my girlfriend? (17/f)
POST: So, me and my best friend were very close. We would tell each other everything we went through and thought. Also, I was in love with her. I know, immature teenage love, but that's irrelevant. Long story short, we're now together. Yay, friendzone fixed, right?
Yes, but no.
She tells me she doesn't feel like she can talk to me like she used to. I'll admit, that's gone both ways, in my attempts to get this whole thing started, I became more withholding with what I told her, to keep her from re-realizing my insanity, planning to tell her those things when we were stable enough to work through it and still be together. I know, that's a red flag, I probably shouldn't have done that. But she still seemingly felt completely capable of being transparent with me, so at the time, I thought it was fine. But I don't think that really affected it so much as the change in relationship status, because everything seemed the same until we started dating, although we've never technically been able to go on even a first date because of how busy we've both been, which could also be a contributing factor.
Anyway, I'm young, I have no experience with bringing emotional intimacy back into the fold. So far, what I'm thinking I need to do is take the first step, and tell her some of the things I left out before, and try to take baby steps to break down the emotional barriers that have built up. Unfortunately, I don't have the slightest clue what those steps are. Can I get some help with that problem?
TL;DR: | I started dating my best friend, and she doesn't feel like she can be as open with me. What do I do? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: My [20 f] grandma [65ish f] has gotten really negative, but can't see it.
POST: She's suffering from really bad flare up from fibro myalgia and arthritis. That's why it's happening, i think, as well as stress (my sister who reactive attachement disorder) I love her, and she's invaluable to the family, but she's making it hard for everyone, including herself
most recently:
-My grandpa has had bad memory for a long time. He gets embarrassed by this. He was supposed to stop in at the vets and pick up the cat food, but forgot. He told us this, and my grandmother, at the top of her voice, bent over, said 'YOU DIDN'T? DID YOU? UGGH. I'LL HAVE TO GO OUT ' Of course, my grandpa got embarrassed, and reacted negatively to this. She then told him 'no need to yell!', and he replied back that he was only reacting the same way she did.
my sister and I agreed, and that meant we were all 'abusing her' (her words. Literally, all we said was 'yes nanny, you did react really negatively to that') and the worst people in the world, etc.
None of this would have happened if my grandma had replied calmly, or my grandpa didn't react. I know my grandpa, and that's not going to change, however, my grandma isn't usually like this, unless she's really stressed, etc, which is why I'd like to figure out a way to approach her. I'd like to help her figure out a way to deal with her stress. I think therapy would help, (I'm pretty sure if she had better ways to deal with pain, she be much more like her old self but I think she feels she's too strong for that.)
Does anyone have any tips for me to approach this without her getting angry?
TL;DR: | grandma not reacting well to pain and stress - would like to know what to do, for our sakes, and hers. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [18 M/] with my ___ [18 F] 19 months, she asked for a brake (pause)
POST: After a year and a half, my GF asked for a "brake" because she was feeling there was missing something.
Its been a week now and she texted me one night if I was going well. We had a normal conversation yesterday but she ended it up by saying "well the brake doesnt seem to work" I tried to explain that maybe this means we maybe dont need it but she insisted on the fact that she needs to think on if she misses me or continue on her way.
Its a real torture to wait without texting her. I'm open to advices on what I can do during this.
TL;DR: | she asked for a break and it's been a week. Feels like she is not interrested in talking. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Has anyone successfully avoided Sprint's ETF? I have no idea if my reason for leaving with waive the ETF.
POST: Basically it's this. I have a the HTC Arrive on Sprint. I LOVE wp7 and it's heartbreaking to hear Sprint's not loving them back. Not too heartbreaking since their terrible speeds and spotty service kills most of the enjoyment I could stand to get. Anyways, since day 1 of this phone it hasn't been able to text over 160 characters even though the user manual and feature list says specifically that it will. Many users have filed complaints about it to Sprint/MS/HTC and they fail to fix or even respond to the issue. Is there any precedent for using this to get out of a contract? I signed a contract when I purchased this phone and the phone doesn't do things it says it does.
TL;DR: | My Sprint phone doesn't do something the manual says it does. Will this allow me to get out of my contract ETF-free and get a provider that offers better speeds, coverage, and wp7 devices? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: My gay friend is threatening to tell my fiancee about gay sex we used to have, how do I stop him?
POST: He's my best friend and we grew up together and used to do pretty typical sexual experiments. We'd watch porn and jerk off together at 10. Then that proceeded to mutual touching, then eventually full blown sex.
This continued sporadically throughout high school, even while I was in relationships. He never dated and is now openly gay. I am completely straight but a horny bastard who likes having my dick sucked.
When I met my fiancee senior year we continued on for a while, but after we slept together I gave him up other than a few bjs in the adjustment period.
That was five years ago. I never cheated on her after that and love her. We are getting married soon. But he told me if I don't tell her he will. He says she has a right to know I am gay (am not) and cheated on her (five years ago).
But if I tell her she may think I am gay and may not trust me anymore. This girl is my life. I don't want to lose her because of stupid shit in the past.
TL;DR: | my gay best friend I fooled around with as a kid is threatening to break up my engagement if I don't tell my fiancee about childhood gay sex acts, this can't happen. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [25F] with my ex-SO [27M] of one year. Is it breaking NC to return items without seeing/talking to the him? Also, what do I do when I see him at work functions? And other questions
POST: I broke up with my SO for the final time last week after an extremely draining and difficult relationship. I implemented NC on this past Thursday. Because he wanted to continue talking and I don't trust myself not to answer, I had to block him on my phone, Facebook, email, and snap chat.
I've been using his comforter and some pillows at my house but would like to return them as they really belong to his parents, and I don't want to be a thief. He actually mentioned to me right before we quit talking that his parents wanted them back as well. Would it be breaking the NC rule to bag them up and drop them off outside his house? Or maybe next to his car so they don't get stolen off his front porch? Does that make me look insane for me to give him his stuff back while he's blocked? Should I just let it go? We don't have any mutual friends in town, or I would ask someone else to do it.
Also, we will eventually have to see each other at community/work functions because we're both involved in the same organizations. How should I handle it when I see him out? I am going to try and avoid anything he'll be at for a while, but I know eventually we'll run into each other.
My other concern related to seeing him out: with one of my ex-boyfriends, I went NC for about four months, saw him out, broke down and contacted him, and then started the cycle of shit right back up again. I do not want to do this here. Can anyone give me some advice on how not to go back once some time has passed and I'm (hopefully) not as ragingly pissed off as I am now? He is extremely manipulative and will take any opportunity I give to let him back in my life, I'm sure.
TL;DR: | Should I drop my ex's stuff off at his house without communicating with him? How do I handle it (and not go back to him) when I see him out? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: (24m) made a drunken pass at a friend last night. Need advice about how to tell my 7 month gf (21) about it.
POST: Been in a relationship for seven months, and overall it's going great. Last night I went out with a group of friends without the gf, and I've had a crush on one of them for a long time. She started talking about her problems with her current boyfriend, and later that night (on the verge of blacking out) I cornered her, confessed my long held feelings, got a little handsy, and just generally made a complete ass of myself.
I'm terrified that this is going to be a deal breaker for my relationship. Despite what I said last night, I have no wish to see it end and can't believe what a stupid fucking mistake I made. I've resolved to tell my gf as soon as possible, but I have no idea what to say.
I've never gotten even this close to cheating on someone, and I just don't know what to do. Any advice or experiences, especially from someone who's been in my gf's shoes, would be greatly appreciated.
TL;DR: | confessed feelings I've had for a friend at a bar, freaking out about how to tell my girlfriend and salvage the relationship |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I think I have a problem.
POST: I cant talk to my s/o about this because he already thinks im crazy and i dont have good enough friends who actually keep their mouths shut about other people, so here i am.
I am 22/f. I have been in LTRs since i was 16 years old, with people of all personality types and backgrounds. For some reason, they all turned out badly.
The first one, lasting 4 years, ended with him getting into hard drugs, teamed up with him already being an alcoholic, and becoming abusive.
The second one, almost 2 years, ended with him having fetishes he was uncomfortble expressing to me, leading him to cheat on me multiple times. I left as soon as i found out, but i have no idea how long he held out before he told me.
These all had similar red flags which im capable of spotting from a mile away now. The relationship im currently in has been going on since late April. We live together, so i notice little stuff. He isnt abusive, no harmful addictions, etc.
When he first moved in with me, he was crazy clingy, which i liked. As of recently, hes become increasingly distant, getting aggravated with me, wants to spend less time with me. Every time this has happened in previous relationships, they ended soon after.
Ive tried to talk to him about it, he just says im crazy and gets annoyed when i try explaining myself. But he barely even replies to my texts, doesnt invite me out with him anymore, and hardly even has conversations with me. It just seems like hes bored being around me.
Our sex life hasnt changed a bit. Just whenever i even wana go out and do something couples do, he doesnt want to be bothered.
I dont know what to do. Im not sure if hes talking to another girl or what; i dont want to go thru his phone or anything, just like i woudnt want him to invade my privacy. Im just at a loss..
TL;DR: | having issues with current boyfriend while having insecurity issues due to past relationships, he wont communicate and just calls me crazy. Advice needed. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [28m] am thinking about asking my gf [29f] to move in, but my ideas of a living arrangement aren't traditional
POST: My girlfriend and I have been together over a year, and my roommate is planning on moving out soon, and it feels like it's time that my girlfriend and I move in together. I feel like my expectations of that are tremendously different than what is generally expected out of a relationship, and I'm curious if I'm in the wrong or if it's too unusual.
Basically, I'd want us to have separate rooms. Naturally, we'd spend the night in each other's rooms most of the time. She's here as frequently as our schedules allow and she's always in my room, and it's great. I'd just want that buffer, for if our schedules don't line up, or if one of us is working on something, or if one of us is doing something that the other isn't interested in. It'd also be nice if we could each adorn a space that is specifically our own, individually.
I just don't know how to pose this idea without being insulting. In the town I grew up in, almost all parents that shared a room got divorced, and the parents that, for one reason or another, had separate rooms, stayed (seemingly) happily married. This has resonated even more with me in relationships where I lived with a girlfriend, and either her interests or mine were a burden on the other. It just feels like a natural kind of situation to me, but I'm totally aware that it's unconventional. I just think there will be nights that I either want to work on something important, or indulge in a hobby that she doesn't share, and she'll be in the same position.
I dunno, is it selfish of me to expect my own space? And if not, how do I present this idea without seeming personally dismissive? I dunno how to put my personal experience into words, and I don't know how normal or damaging it sounds.
TL;DR: | Want my girlfriend to move in, but I want us to have our own rooms for nights when we could theoretically enjoy ourselves or be more productive on our own than with the other. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (23 M) think my gf (22 F) is more than just friends with her "bff", what do I do?
POST: So I have been seriously dating this girl for 4 years now who I met in college and actually lives in the town next to mine, and until this summer things were good. Hell they were great. Now she has a guy friend, we'll call him Andrew, who has been her friend since they were kids and they graduated together. I am a very nice guy and always tried to strike up a friendship with Andrew. However...
The dude HATES me. He is an awkward guy, quiet, and she says he was always bullied in high school. I am confident and talkative so I guess he always felt intimidated by that, as if I was going to start bullying him which I would never do. He also always had strong feelings for her which she knew about and that probably is a strong contributing factor to him disliking me.
Anyways I have no problem with someone I am dating to have guy friends, I have no problem if they hang out without me. Jealousy is not a healthy thing.
But lately they have been hanging out all the time, while she will blow me off to hang with him. By the all the time, I mean almost every time I ask her to hang out. They are going out to dinner together at really nice restaurants, posting very flirty snapchats, and the few times we are together she is smiling at her phone and texting him.
She seems annoyed if I ask her to hang, is short with me, pretty much acts like I don't exist.. Like I said this behavior between the two of them is VERY recent to this summer.
I really hate to think negatively but I am pretty sure something is budding between them and I am being pushed out. I will sound like such a dick saying this but I couldn't even fathom what would make her prefer him. I am a college graduate, I am a decently good looking guy (she is good looking herself), I am sociable, friendly and funny. He has a terrible hygiene, is very nasty to everyone besides her, works as a busboy at a restaurant with no plans to better himself.
Do you agree something is up? How do I go from here the best way?
TL;DR: | Girlfriend of 4 years and her male "bff" who dislikes me are increasingly getting closer while her and I drift apart. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [18M] feels like I need a girlfriend. I feel desperate.
POST: So, i'm an 18 year old freshman in college and I feel so lonely. I feel like I need to be in a relationship to be happy. I've only been in one real relationship and it really screwed me up. I'm over her now. But now, I feel lonely. I feel like I need someone to be happy. I just want to have someone to care for and to care for me again.
I feel so pathetic saying all of this, but it's the truth. I'm just so sad and lonely. I have nothing to really do in life besides go to school, produce music, and cars.
I also dress nice and maintain my appearance.
TL;DR: | I feel like I need a girlfriend and I feel sad/lonely. What's going on? What should I do? Why am I like this? |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU: By ordering Pizza
POST: So this happened a couple of weeks back, around one or two.
Now how could a human being possible cause a fuck up from ordering Pizza? Well when you have parents who put so much effort into cooking you food and leaving it in the fridge for you to eat it later.... That could lead it to a fuck up.
They were out at work and they usually return very late, I was hungry and I didn't feel like eating the stuff they left me, I was feeling up for some Pizza. So I head over to Pizza's hut site and order Two large Cheese Pizzas with extra garlic. I pay everything VIA credit card cause' I CBF carrying money with me anymore (For reasons which I choose not disclose). Whatever. They take my order in and send it my way.
This is where the fuck up happens... My parents get home from work, coincidentally at the same time the Pizza arrives.
Since I already paid for the Pizza via credit card, they just take it from the delivery guy and then ring the doorbell.
I am greeted with 2 mad parents, giving me a death stare holding my Pizza in their hands.
Needles to say, They both ate the Pizza and I was forced to watch them eat it without getting a single bite of it.... Not to mention I lost like 25 or something dollars because they didn't give me the money I spent back to me and now they are mad at me.
So yeah, I kinda fucked up pretty bad....
TL;DR: | Ordered Pizza, Paid with Credit card, Parents arrive home at same time as Pizza guy, Parents take Pizza and eat it in front of me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/cats
TITLE: Cat attack!
POST: Ok so my girlfriends Cat Is 2.5 years old. She was always slightly aggressive and would lunge randomly. So I suggested she go get fixed and it may help. Well nope, it got worse. Now she hisses and bites at anyone after being totally fine. She will lay in bed with us all night and be ok. But if I stand up or walk across my girlfriends bedroom she bolts and attacks me. Gives my leg a real thrashing. She has even met me at the top of the stairs when I came over when her and her roommates were gone. The cat was trying to attack me through the door at the top of the stairs. So I'm not sure what to do. I'm a dog guy and never had an inside cat. We told the vet and he gave her diazapan(spelling?) And that just made her wobbly and she tore up my girlfriends arm. We aren't sure what to do at this point and my girlfriend will be heart broken if we have to get rid of the cat. Any tips?
TL;DR: | CAT WAS AGGRESSIVE. CAT GOT FIXED. CAT IS NOW WAY MORE AGGRESSIVE AND ATTACKS UNPROVOKED. HELP. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: My girlfriend admitted to having "urges and curiosities". Help me, Reddit.
POST: Okay so a little background: My girlfriend and I have been going out for over a year now. We're both 19 and have changed from a very clingy relationship to a more open one. By open, I mean hanging out with different people, doing different things, etc. She's been saying she feels lost lately and tonight she admitted that she misses having "crushes" and the excitement of a new relationship. She made sure to tell me that she loves me, and never wants to lose me.
However, she did make a point to suggest that we try each hooking up with someone else. I was taken aback. I told her I understand that she feels like she wants something new, and that people get bored sometimes but that the idea of going outside of the relationship and kissing someone else really doesn't sit well with me. I thought about it and I just don't know what to do. A part of me says if we both do it once we can avoid jealousy and she can find what she really wants, but the other part of me says that this isn't a solution.
I know I should follow my instincts, and I usually do, but this situation has left me dumbfounded. What could come of this? Is this a good idea? Reddit, please advise me. I really need it.
TL;DR: | My girlfriend of over a year wants to try and kiss someone else in an attempt to re-energize our relationship and give us more direction. I am afraid of the consequences. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [16 M] with a girl [15 F] How do I meet a girl whom I havent met and dont have any good mutual friends?
POST: About 3 years ago, when I was always walking to the train station, and girl would get off the bus which stopped at the station. She was really cute but didn't catch my train and so I essentially never got to talk to her. I thought she was really really cute so I tried to find her on Facebook but I couldn't.
The next year she stopped catching the bus. I'm guessing it was because she moved to another suburb nearby or something.
Today, almost 3 years later, I found her on Facebook by chance when I was looking through one of my friends photos. Honestly, I almost cried I couldn't believe it. I was like shocked.
I looked out our mutual friends and we only had one of whom I was like sort of friends with. So I popped up to her and before I could even start up a proper conversation she started replying with short "yes", "aha ok" etc. No essentially, the one friend who could have set us up isnt interested in being friends with me anymore.
So how do I meet this girl. I could add her on Facebook and talk to her but that will be really sketchy and creepy. Her friend aint interested so shes out of the mix. I don't really go to any parties that she goes to because she is in the year below and goes to a school completely different to mine.
How can I meet her?
TL;DR: | How can i meet a girl whom I only seen from a distance who I find really cute without her thinking I am a creep when the only mutual friend between us doesnt want to be friends with me anymore. |
SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: I want to spend a year on the West Coast before college, but I have no idea where to start
POST: I am set to graduate highschool this year, but Im not sure what I should do afterwards.
Up until today, I had been planning on going straight to college after I finished my senior year, but now I am having second thoughts. I feel that now is the best time to travel, while Im not tied down with student loans, relationships, and a real career, and all the other responsibilities being an adult entails. Whats the rush, right?
After a little bit of thought I decided I really want to go out to a city out in the Northwest. Im thinking about spending a year somewhere out there, and seeing where I end up. Who knows?
There are so many problems I still have to work out though, like;
- What city should I go to?
Im looking for a city with a lot of great oppurtunities for an aspiring, young artist.
- Where will I stay?
I dont have any friends or connections out west really, and thus have no way of really getting a place to stay I feel. Other people have mentioned hostels or camping, but I feel like those options mean I cant stay in a city.
- How much money are we talking?
I have about $2,000 saved up, and I can probably save another $1,500 by the end if my senior year. Will this be enough? I plan on finding a job when I get to my new city.
Im looking to get some work experience doing almost anything art related, some fantastic friendships and connections, and whatever else comes my way. I want to be a total "Yes Man". Whats most important to me though, is that I get to meet new people and experience life somewhere other than this town Ive lived in my whole life.
Feel free to share any experiences, advice, or tips with me. Im totally open to any suggestions!
TL;DR: | A rising senior in highschool wants to spend a year on the west coast, making art, friends, and memories before heading to college and getting tied down, but has no idea where to start. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Former interest [F22] now wants to see where things go with me [M24] after prior, failed attempts.
POST: Back in HS, I had this one girl who I always had a crush on, even if I had other girlfriends or was single, she always knew a part of me wanted her. And I still believe part of her wanted me too, I just never made an actual move.
We continued talking through college and kept that kind of ambiguous nature of our relationship active. She would always talk the talk without walking the walk, you know, say she would want to visit me at school without ever following through, or vice versa.
Well fast forward to summer last year and I flat out told her that I had always had a crush on her and just plainly put myself out there for her. Nothing. Oh well, I moved on.
Skip to earlier this week and I get this text out of nowhere asking how I've been and wanting to catch up and all that jazz. Now I'm confused. She was never really the type to go out of her way to talk to me since before I was the one doing all the leg work and she knew I would eventually give in. And even after putting myself out there, we just kind of stopped talking altogether.
Now, the ball is in my court. I'm obviously still attracted to her physically, but I don't want to give her any leverage in this.
I know it sounds crappy, but the man in me wants to just get what I can out of her (sexually) and then say "see ya". Because of how she reacted when I put myself out there. But if anyone has some prior experience with a similar relationship I would be like to hear your input.
TL;DR: | Former romantic interest now has desire to get together after I put myself out there a while back. How should I handle it? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [21/M] dating [19/F] missionary gone for 6 months
POST: I started this very plootanic relationship 7 months ago with the girl that is now my gf. We've been together officially for 4 months this week, but last month she started a missionary program. Needless to say she is now on the other side of the country, bogged down with a hectic and straining schedule, and I am a student with my own busy schedule.
this now being the one month period I feel the distance starting to get to me. I have begun to overthink texts and skype conversations which leave me wandering if our relationship can rebound after this seperation.
IMPORTANT BIT: In the past three days I have met two girls who are not only kind and beautiful and down to earth, they're not 10 states away. I can't get one of them out of my mind no matter how hard I try. I feel like a real dirtbag because of the two girls the one I can't stop thinking about is cuurently in a relationship with a new found friend.
I realize I am young, impatient, and probably insecure about more things than I realize, but I simply need advice on how to make the distance managable/ how to mend strained relationships. Thanks a bill for reading.
TL;DR: | gf is away for a mission trip and on top on our relationship starting to dim, I can't get a new girl out of my thoughts. |
SUBREDDIT: r/loseit
TITLE: Areas of weight loss
POST: Basically lost just over a stone in the past 5 months slowly but surely. I'm now 154 pounds and a height of 5"10 - 5"11 I can never tell haha But basically i've noticed a few things since losing this weight, the very vast majority was my stomach, I lost some from my legs and almost none from my very chubby face. I expected this sure because I mainly did it through dieting but my ribs are rather exposed whilst my waist is still still a bit thick. Was wondering if this is to be expected and if there is a way to make me lose weight specifically on my face and legs
TL;DR: | Lost weight a stone (was only chubby) only visible with very distinct ribs showing whilst rest still chubby. Help me :) |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: [19M] and my girlfriend [19F] of 1.5 years: Lack of any form of PDA now. Makes me think she doesn't want to commit anymore.
POST: Last summer my girlfriend and I went through a very rough patch over the summer; both of us went home from college and we were about 2000 miles apart. We've since picked up where we left off, but very different from before that summer. Back when we first started dating, we'd always hold hands and lock arms and such in public. For the past five months however, we've probably never done that since. It's especially a problem when I feel that other guys are trying to make a move on her, or get a little too close and chatty for my liking. I'm about 4 inches shorter than her and Asian (she's white), so most people never think of us as dating, and that worries me. I hate the paranoia of thinking that she's ashamed, doesn't want to commit, or worse, that she likes the attention of other guys. Out of public, we spend almost all our time together, and everything's just great when we're at each other's place or with a small group of friends. I guess what I'm just worried about is she doesn't want to show everyone else we're together anymore. Any insight?
TL;DR: | Girlfriend and I used to hold hands and stuff in public, now it's down to zero PDA and it worries me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/offmychest
TITLE: Annoyed and confused, not sure what to think. Would love some feedback.
POST: I got a text from my cousin a few days ago. I was thrilled, he was going to be in town and wanted to meet up. I had this image of us meeting up and getting to know one another better. We only talk during big family events so I was happy to see him one on one. I asked him where he wanted to go and tried to leave it open.
He never got back to me. Little did I know I was agreeing to meet him his best friend and my parents for the day. I know it seems paranoid but I feel like I was more of an afterthought. He never responded to any of my texts. I know he got them because he told other people I was going to join them. That also means he had time to text so no "I'm busy" as an excuse because he had time to text the people I think he really wanted to see. Am I reading too much into this? The whole thing makes me feel awful.
TL;DR: | not sure if relative really wants to spend time with me because they want to or if it's because they feel obligated. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (18f) am 'hanging out' with a guy (20'sM) this weekend and need advice
POST: I've talked to this guy multiple times recently and he seemed really interesting and we have a lot in common. We've known each other in passing for awhile but only introduced ourselves a month ago and started talking a week ago. Yesterday I asked him out and said "what are you doing this weekend? We should hang out". He put his number in my phone and we talked about hanging out Saturday but never set anything in stone about when/where/what.
We didn't call it a date but we're hanging out 1 on 1. We've talked enough that I already know I'd like to try dating him, so I don't want to screw this up.
Things to note:
1. We live in different areas of town but both have cars.
2. We didn't establish what we would do or when.
So my questions. Is it okay for me to text him and ask when/what/where he wants to hang out? Should I leave it up to him or offer suggestions? He's lived in the city longer than I have and he knows it better than I do. If I offer suggestions, what would you recommend? We do live in a big city so there is usually quite a bit going on. I was thinking coffee, a park (maybe with lunch), farmer's market, etc etc.
TL;DR: | Hanging out with a guy I like this weekend. What should we do and how should I communicate this to him? |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: What if all this North Korean propaganda was to take our focus off a real, more present threat?
POST: In light of all the DPRK (North Korea) propaganda recently about how they are "planning and all out attack on U.S." or that they have the ability to "fire nuclear-armed missiles that could reach our homeland."
What if they're releasing all of this to direct our focus away from the REAL threat: Cyber Warfare. Keep in mind that DPRK's people are completely shut out from the rest of the world and literally worship their leader and take what he says as GOLD. The films could be more of a way to keep them believing that we fear them (which is not the case at all).
So, as we sit here focused on their combative army they could, potentially, be attacking us from within. ~~Also, keep in mind that North Korea now runs ThePiratebay.org, a popular torrent hosting site.~~
They train hackers in teams.
A MILITARY GPS satellite had been shut down, breaking communications between American troops in South Korea during exsercise. North Korea is taking blame for previously using Chinese IP addresses as a source of cyber attacks.
These are just a few that I could find in such a short time. There are tons more if you look for it. I'm here all day if I'm needed to do such a thing.
-----
My source for this thought: I have a friend that is a Signal Officer in the Army attending a Millitary Science course with other Majors soon-to-be promoted to LTCs. He brings stuff like cyber security up in his classroom and everyone just looks at him as if such a thing wasn't important.
My major in college has to do with Infosec (information security) and I see a lot of importance on the subject.
TL;DR: | North Korea has been training teams of "hack warriors". Propaganda of sending nukes could be taking focus off the real threat: Cyber warfare. |
SUBREDDIT: r/legaladvice
TITLE: (CA) I signed up for health insurance with my employer I was told benefits would start in July. Still no benefits.
POST: So basically I signed up for health insurance with a benefits counselor for my employer. I was told I was enrolled and my health insurance would be effective 07/01. July rolls around and I have still not received any insurance info and the insurance company has no record of me. So I call HR and email them repeatedly with no response. It is now August. After repeatedly complaining to my boss because I'm sick and need to see a doctor, I get through to HR and she says she will look into it. Finally after bugging her for two weeks I find out I was never actually enrolled and that she will enroll me so my insurance will be effective 09/01. As of today I still have no insurance, the insurance company still has no record of me, and now HR lady is dodging my calls. And I'm still sick. This whole time I have not been getting deductions so I'm not getting screwed out of money or anything, but I still feel like I'm getting cheated. Is my company allowed to be doing this? I'm really not trying to sue or anything, I just want to see a fucking doctor!
TL;DR: | company told me I was getting health benefits, I'm still not enrolled despite being told I was several times and now HR is dodging me. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [22 M/] with my wife [21 F] 5 years, doesnt care about looks?
POST: On my phone so please excuse formatting.
This is a weird one, I'm sure. It feels really petty but I cant shake the feeling.
My wife alleges that she doesnt have a type. We've talked about it before and I've always said she's full of shit. But last night we got in depth with it and she explained that shes attracted to personalities, not type. Further discussion revealed that, no matter what I looked like, she would have still fallen in love with me, and married me.
And it just felt..shitty. She equated my appearance to being a bonus. And now I feel like a big part of my identity is irrelevent. Im honestly a little vain, and I recognize that. But being told that what I look like doesnt matter made it feel like part of me doesnt matter, like her attraction to me is.. hollow I guess? She says she thinks im good looking, but it doesnt feel like it matters shes attracted to me physically knowing it doesnt matter to her romantically.
I recognize I'm being a little petty, but am I unreasonable? Is it weird? Am i wrong? I guess i dont really know what to think or how to respond to the shitty feeling it gives me.
TL;DR: | Wife admitted that physical attraction wasnt a part of the equation when she fell in love with me, and i makes me feel shitty. I dont know what to think. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Is it wrong for me (~24/f) to hide depression/issues from bf (25/m) if everything else is going well and he's happy with the relationship?
POST: I think I have chronic depression and disassociative disorder (talked with a shrink for the first time and while she said I seem pretty normal given my past/life, I do show signs of disassociation). I am very logical, "successful" and stable but numb and detached. Everything is muted. I have a heart condition (very low heart rate) which also makes me somewhat tired/aloof all the time (trying to treat it but don't have the money nor conviction to get a pacemaker). I am also genuinely scared I might be trans as I feel much more comfortable in the male identity, fantasize about having a male body, do not like having a female body, and realize that I am most likely bi and watch lots of porn.
So there's a lot I have going on. I have told my man about some of it and his answers are a bit trite and unhelpful. I prefer to keep my mental issues separate from "us." At the same time, I feel like by not divulging my mental "illnesses" he doesn't fully know me. And I strongly believe he doesn't want to know the real me (and I don't want him to either). Is it wrong of me to feel this way? He's happy with how I present myself (which is still me--minus the issues) as I am high-functioning, and I get the satisfaction of having a companion who is good, handsome, nice etc. and prove to myself I can be "normal." But it seems deceptive. I just don't trust any man enough to open up and I figure that's a job for a shrink, anyway.
TL;DR: | i have lots of issues and don't open up to bf since i think it is my own personal issues to be dealt with with a shrink only, if anyone. is that okay? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (20 F) want to live separately from my so (20 M), to get out of our comfort and get the spark back.
POST: Me (20 F) and my boyfriend (20 M) have been dating for 2 years 7 months and have moved abroad to study. We've been living together in London for nearly 2 years. Our friends and family say we're a match made in heaven and our life as a couple is great... but we don't have any friends here, we both suffer from social anxiety and we're each others' ultimate comfort zone and this domestic life is making me feel older than I'm actually are (I feel like his mum!). I've asked him countless times to take up more responsibilities, to go work out, etc. I just sometimes feel suppressed as an individual and sometimes hate myself for being harsh to him. I still want to date him (I love him a lot), but I want to try living separately, because I feel like I'm missing out on something in my life, I'll be forced to go out more and maybe we will get our love spark back? He says he doesn't see any problems in our relationship, but living separately kinda makes sense, but it also looks like we're breaking up and we should give it more time (but I know he likes to drag things)
TL;DR: | we've been living together with my so and I'd like to live separately to get out of our comfort zone and get our spark back, he says it's like breaking up and we should give it more time. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Need some advice
POST: Ok so long story short my girlfriend [f 19] and I [m 20] (together now for 4 years) were having some issues in our relationship. Distance from going to separate colleges is to blame and her fears to commit added into that sort of scared her. After being on a break for a very short while we are still in some sense in a relationship but not on the same level that we were before. The plan is to work back to that level while trying to balance the distance. We are still very much in love and she tells me all the time that she can't live without me in her life and that she wouldn't be where she is today without me. I have done a lot for her and she is always there for me no matter what.
Anyway that was just the backstory. Being that we ran into these problems I told my mom about them since it was weird to her that we weren't together hanging out as much this summer since it was during this break we had. I made sure I emphasized this was purely distance. She even asked me if it was because she found someone else. This is not the case at all (me and the gf have been down that road while talking) and i told my mom that.
Now my gf's friend got a job for the summer at the office my mom manages and we are hearing stories from her about how my mom has in her head that she has found someone else, and that she wishes we would break up. I can't confront my mom about this directly and I don't know what else to do, I've just been waiting for an opportunity to hear something negative said amongst my family to be able to defend the true story. I don't even know what the rest of my family knows, should I be asking one of my siblings what they know and see what happens? Or should I just ignore this whole thing. I just hate the fact that there could be any hard feelings between the one I love and my family. Any advice?
TL;DR: | My relationship was having problems, but we are now working through it. However, my mom talks badly about it behind my back saying that my gf has found someone else when that is not the case. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: ELI5 what being in a long lasting relationship is like
POST: OK so I have been going out with this girl for 8mo so far, things for most part are pretty good (hard to say what amazing really is..can any of you? ). However we both got jobs in Oregon (currently in MN), and in the moving process we are arguing a lot!. Mainly because she has stuff she wants to bring (which she has worked for to accumulate and also does not want to arrive at the new place with a bare empty apartment, without a couch or a bed). I understand her desire to keep her loot, but its a pain in the ass to haul across 2000miles.
Anyways in this whole fiasco, I got thinking what does Reddit know about long lasting functional relationships, and what should my parents and education have taught me about being a relationship.
TL;DR: | Describe what your long lasting relationship is like from your perspective and from your SO if you can, curious to know other peoples experience |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [25M] am 5 months out of a 7yr relationship, my friend [22F] is into me, not sure if I should ask her out. (HELP)
POST: So I'm 25, have only been with one woman and that was a 7 year relationship. My ex cheated on me and left me for another if you consider that important. I've been thinking for the last month or two that I was ready to look for someone new and now that the chance is here I've begun second guessing myself.
A friend (who I've only really got to know well since breaking up) and I have been spending a lot of time together over the last month, particularly alone over the last week. I find her funny, attractive, intelligent and we share several common interests. I know she's into me through body language, communication and her friend. Though there's been no sex or kissing we have exchanged some cuddling and foot massages.
BUT the thing is that because I've got no experience outside of my ex I'm uncertain if my feelings are just a good connection with someone, lust or genuine attraction and if that should matter too much. I also feel completely unknowing about the dating game in general.
I consider her a good friend and I don't want to wreck a new friendship because my feelings are not genuine. Also because of this I don't want to hurt her or have her feel I used her. I'm finding Ive been second guessing myself and everyone I've talked to so far have given mixed advice, however they have stakes in my friend and/or me.
Should I ask her out or would this be something best left alone so we will remain close friends? I don't want to hurt her...
TL;DR: | Interested in a friend who's definitely into me. Only 5 months out of 7 year relationship. I therefore lack dating experience and am second guessing if my feelings are genuine. Should I ask her out? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [26 F] have a crush on my friends brother [30 M]
POST: So not really sure what to do here. I have a crush on my friends brother. We are both single, I am just getting out of a pretty long marriage. The other, kind of sticky issue is that I am friends with their mom, who has essentially adopted my kids as her grandkids. So if things go bad it could be really bad i guess and if things go well it could be awesome. So I asked my friend to give her brother my number but she gave me his instead. So now I am contemplating what to do and if i do text him what I should say. I just saw him yesterday at my friends sons first birthday party.
TL;DR: | My friend gave me her brothers number, dont know if i should text him or not and if so what to say. |
SUBREDDIT: r/tifu
TITLE: TIFU by messing with a makeshift ramp
POST: A long time ago, when I was a kid, my neighbors and I were outside playing. We were riding our bikes today, and decided to make a ramp using wood and a cinderblock. We were having fun taking turns going up the ramp and jumping off the other side.
This carried on for hours, and it started to get boring pretty quick. I asked if anyone wanted to do something else, but they said no and kept recording themselves jumping the ramp. I figured "maybe if the ramp falls apart they'll get bored and be done", so I mess with the board to put it closer to the edge of the block expecting it to fall after a jump and us be done.
My friend goes up the ramp one last time, and crap it breaks early sending the front wheel into the side of the block and him skidding across a few feet of asphalt. We stopped after that, but soon after his older brother called me out on messing with it to which I replied nervously that I was just trying to fix it so it wouldn't fall.
TL;DR: | messed with a makeshift ramp, friend went up it, and got 5 feet of asphalt road rash. Got called out on it, lied, and ran off. |
SUBREDDIT: r/self
TITLE: Hey Reddit, can you please help me out? (Details inside and through link)
POST: Hey Reddit, could do me a huge favour and Vote for this NON-Profit organization that I support? (Link below)
V.E.T.S Canada reaches out to homeless and at-risk military veterans in Canada (as well as The States). We primarily help veterans in Canadian cities, but also do our best for vets in American cities though our growing social network of volunteers. (And you guys know a thing or 2 about what it's like being a social network).
We're using aviva community fund to raise money for Vets. We're currently 5 places out of making it into the finals for which we win $5000 that goes straight to our cause, and a chance at winning the entire competition (+cash prize).
If you could please vote for our cause, you would be helping out more than you'll ever know. This is just an excellent chance for our Non-Profit to acquire funds for helping homeless veterans.
Thanks Everyone
TL;DR: | Please vote for us, we're a Non-profit for Homeless Veterans. We're in a competition and have a good chace at winning $5000 for our non-profit!" |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I (17/f) am trying to decide whether to break up with my boyfriend (18/m)
POST: My life/relationships are usually reminiscent of a shitty soap opera, but this is getting annoying and awful.
I (17/f) am dating a guy (18/m), and have been for 7 months. We were really happy. But then I met another person (17/m) and we developed feelings for each other. I thought it would pass. I really did. But it's been going on since like, October, and it hasn't gone away. On top of that, my feelings for my boyfriend disappeared.
So I decided, hey, better break up with him before he gets hurt severely/before I make a mistake. For about a week I was happy with my decision. Then like a week ago, something happened, and I started...having feelings for my boyfriend again? I think. I'm not sure what it is, and that's my problem. I still care about my boyfriend. It's not the same as it used to be, but I still care.
I'm thinking I should still break up with him, just so he doesn't get hurt, but...I don't know if I want to. I definitely don't want to hurt him.
Essentially, my question becomes: how do I decide what to do/what do I do? I have horrible mixed feelings about the whole situation. No matter what, I wouldn't be breaking up with this kid in order to be with the other person (I'm not sure I want to date him anyway).
TL;DR: | I don't know how to decide whether to break up with my boyfriend or not, because I don't know if I have feelings for him. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Are we just bad at texting or is there something wrong?
POST: So I'm dating this guy (gay) who is a year younger than me (16) and we've been together for almost a month. I love everything about him, he's a seriously awesome guy and he's amazing and when we're together, we cuddle and it's amazing and I make him happy (at least I think) and he makes me happy. But when we're apart, I text him and I mostly get one word answers. Does this mean he just doesn't want to text or am I bugging him? Should I not text him, even though I love texting him? Idk. And we also never have much to talk about but still love each other's company, is that bad or normal?
TL;DR: | I love texting him but I always feel like I bug him when I do, we never have a huge amount to talk about but we love spending time together and I don't know if it's normal? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: Me [17F] with my guy [18 M] long time, I don't know what to do....
POST: I have a long distance relationship with a guy, it's not labeled as boyfriend/girlfriend because we both realize long distance is hard, but we treat eachother as though we're dating. I've told him everything, always, but lately he has gotten busy... He's going back to college, and is starting work. He is planning to visit me as soon as he gets the money because what we have is different and really special.
However, since he has had less time for me, I got doubtful if he even had those feelings anymore. I flirted with some other guys and they fell for me hard. The long-distance guy has since then discussed his feelings with me, and has begun to make plans to visit... but now I have other guys, and they're closer and have more time for me, so I find myself talking to them. They know I have this other guy, and that I like him dearly, but that doesn't change their thoughts on me. I don't know what to do, talking to them feels so wrong, but I feel so lonely... I've told the long-distance guy about them, and he was pretty calm, but I could tell it irked him. Any ideas on what to do? How do I keep from being lonely without having other guys?
Also, most of my friends support the guy that is closer to me...so I feel split in a thousand directions, because I definitely like the guy that is faraway more.
TL;DR: | I have, basically a boyfriend, that is long distance, got lonely, talked to other guys. Now they won't stop talking to me, and I don't know what to do. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I (28/m) should have known better then to let her (25/f) back into my life.
POST: We had a terrible break up last November and its taken me this entire year to get over it. Finally when I was back up on my feet and feeling good about everything and was dating again she gave me a call wanting to get a drink. I said sure and that drink turned into a week and a half of her sleeping over every night and us hanging out constantly.
After that week and a half was up she just decided she was over it I guess and haven't really heard from her since. I'm a basket case again. I feel like I'm right back where I started.
This just sucks, I hate feeling this way and I hate that I let myself do this to me again.
I'm just venting.
TL;DR: | My ex came back into my life for a week and then left just as fast. I feel like I'm right back where I started. |
SUBREDDIT: r/AskReddit
TITLE: Think my sister is back on drugs...
POST: Hey Reddit, I'm an 18 yo with two older sisters (25, 27). My middle sister has always been a ~~drama queen~~ problem child, going through a rough high school life, getting to college, getting into cocaine and never graduating. As far as I know, she has relied heavily on alcohol for at least 7 years, gotten into mild pills like Adderall, and then the cocaine. In the past year, she has distanced herself even further than usual from the family, started lying a lot, and when we do see her, she is constantly agitated, can't sit still and unable to have a one-on-one conversation (about anything). She is bizarrely concerned with appearance and uses rude comments to distance herself from any conversation. I can't say that these are all new traits but they have certainly been exacerbated in the last year or so. I'm worried that she has gotten into some sort of drug but I don't know what to do with that. I want to confront her but I'm afraid. I feel like I should have some sort of evidence so she can't just write it off with a lie, but I don't know how I would find any sort of proof. I would never forgive myself, though, if I suspected it was going on, didn't do anything and something happened to her.
TL;DR: | I want some advice on how to confront my sketchy sister on her drug abuse/addiction when I know she will probably jus tile or write me off. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [24/M] have a lingering trust problem with her [28/F] fidelity/attention
POST: Been dating this person since August with a few ups and downs; nothing I can't reconcile after talking and thinking. One topic that has come up every once and a while is that she sometimes has this overwhelming sense of aloneness / need to be with someone... to the point that she'll text me containing "...if I spent the night with someone, and didn't sleep with them... "
I have a life, but when someone (especially a SO), needs company; I'll oblige that in any way I can. So, when I get these texts or messages, I typically call and make sure she's OK and we hang out or I spend the night.
I have lingering doubts/suspicions that she might not always let me know if this is the case. I'd really like to bring this up with her; if only to ease my mind and help build a higher level of trust...
But I can't think of a non-abrasive way to come out and ask. I've let her know and shown her that I can be there and am there for her. I would feel somewhat guilty for outright telling her to not see these people (whoever they are??)... but thats exactly what I feel like I need to say.
TL;DR: | How do I bring this topic up in a direct way and have her understand that I just want to trust her more and not being accusatory? |
SUBREDDIT: r/personalfinance
TITLE: Should I drop one of my credit cards?
POST: I have never had a balance, I have a small financing on my car solely for credit purposes, many years of living in cash saved up, 800+ credit score. Never missed a payment on anything ever.
I have 3 personal cards: Two of them are rewards cards (Opened in 2009 and 2012. Combined cost of $85/yr - keeping these) and third I got when I was a student in 2009 (no fee). I never use the third card as it has no rewards. I think I shredded it probably 2 years ago so I didn't have to keep track of it. In a normal situation, it'd probably make sense to keep it to keep my average account age high. However, there's a kicker - it's making my average account age younger.
When I was younger, my parents added me to a department store account, which shows up as a Capital One credit card on my credit reports - with the account open date in the early 1990's. I'm still on it so my average account age shows up as over 8 years old... aka every card I have is making my average account age younger.
My third card only has $4k in credit line, the other two have a combined $23k. If I dumped it my average account age would go from 8.25 years to 9.33 years, my credit line would go from 27k to 23k.
Also, I'm a little bit sick of having a bill come every month saying $0. I almost wish Citi would cancel the card for inactivity
TL;DR: | Should I close a credit card account to increase my average account age from 8.25 to 9.33 years, at the expense of my credit line going from 27k to 23k? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Advice
TITLE: Having trouble choosing what I want to go to school for
POST: I (20f) have been thinking about what path I'd like to take with my schooling for about two years now. Three years ago I was taking two of the bare minimum pre-requisites required, English and Algebra. Then some family issues came up and I had to quit for the time being. I've been ready to go back to school for these past two years, but haven't due to the fact that I simply cannot make up my mind on what I want to do for my career. In my school, when I originally signed up, I had to tell the advisor what I wanted to do as a career before anything else. Just so that they can get my pre req's figured out and assign me to the classes needed. That's really all that is holding me back right now; I can't make up my damn mind.
I've got it narrowed down to three different paths. Two are in the medical field, one is a food/hospitality path. My parents are pushing for ANYTHING in the medical field, because there will always be work and it's usually good money, too. But I feel like my passion would be the other choice, Baking and Pastry Arts. I feel that my creativity would run wild and I would love it. But I want to be guaranteed a job; yeah people will always need cakes and pastries professionally made but I think people would need medical personnel more. I'm just afraid of going to school for something and ending up regretting all the time and money spent on something I don't love doing. Has anyone else been in the same situation? How did you make your decision?
TL;DR: | Can't decide whether to follow the money or follow the dream with my schooling. Need help and input of others who were in similar situations. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: Me [22 M] is struggling with dating after a long relationship.
POST: In 2012 I left an extremely long relationship 5+ years (she cheated with more than one guy alongside a healthy dose of emotional manipulation to me over a few years). After about 6 months of being single and getting over the past relationship I decided to try to get fit again and try to date and find someone who I could actually form a healthy relationship with. During this 6 month period I gained a fair bit of muscle and reverted back to my body type of doing several sports a week. Keep in mind before this process I was fairly average (I.E I wasn't overweight just not "fit").
...
What I didn't expect was to be met with a huge amount of entitlement and hypocrisy. While dating I found that many girls have a prince charming fantasy and don't actually want much more than a guy who is anything other than a stereotype. Of the girls I've met a number of them were initially very interested but eventually ended up with the "bro" type other than myself.
...
Using a few dating sites I determined that very few people look at anything past your pictures. I tested this using two otherwise identical profiles only swapping out a picture of myself from before and after I got fit. The difference was literally 5+ messages a day (fit profile) to nothing (average profile). I experimented further and removed any semblance of information about myself from the fit profile and these numbers increased. This was mirrored in all other forms of dating as the less I told someone about myself and the more sarcastic/witty I acted the longer I would end up dating someone. I'm the kind of guy who loves to talk and have deeper conversations, loves poetry, and even has a soft spot for romance in general. What I've determined is that apparently this is unattractive...
...
As a side note: no, I don't reveal the romantic side of myself in an odd way, most of the people I've gone out with invite me to hang out with them afterwards as a "friend", they just aren't interested any longer.
...
TL;DR: | I'm actually beginning to fear that I won't find someone because my romantic personality and my hope of having something other than just a physical relationship. What should I do r/relationships_advice ? |
SUBREDDIT: r/Parenting
TITLE: Questions about entertaining neighborhood children on Halloween night
POST: First off, I apologize if this is not the appropriate place to ask this, but I figured parents are the people I need to talk to so I came here first! If there is another subreddit where this would be better suited, please let me know!
So, I am just starting my own princess part business (where a princess comes to your house for your kid's party) and I thought Halloween would be an excellent time to advertise and at least get my name out to my neighborhood, as well as do something fun and free for all the little kids that live nearby.
My idea is to dress up as a princess, say Cinderella, then give her a little costume accessory (a small mask, witch hat or cat ears and face or something little like that) so that it is Cinderella dressed up as a cat and not some grown up dressed as Cinderella. Does that work? Will kids get that? Or will they just think I am someone dressed as a princess?
Then I was thinking of sitting outside with my candy and some story books (Princess Halloween stories of course) and read stories to kids and pass out candy. My only thing is, would kids even be interested in stopping to hear a story while they are trying to gather candy? I thought it might be a good chance for a break but I'm not sure kids are even in to that. Would your child want to stop the candy hunt to hear a story from a princess for 2-5 minutes? What would they want to do if they encountered a "real" princess while trick-or-treating? Pictures? Autographs? Nothing?
Does any of this sound like something kids would like on Halloween or would I just be sitting there all alone dressed as a princess dressed as a cat?
Thanks for your input! If you have any other ideas of what I can do, let me hear 'em!
TL;DR: | Own a princess party business; want to advertise in my neighborhood on Halloween by dressing up as a princess. What should I do to engage the neighborhood kids other than just handing out candy? |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [28M] was referred to date a colleague [25F], but I'm not interested. How do I let her know without it backfiring?
POST: A few months back a few colleagues asked me to "hangout" after work, but this hangout was actually a match making date they had planned without asking me. I was "matched" with Jane. I met Jane and I did not find her attractive so I wasn't interested. I told one of the colleagues I wasn't interested, but she recommended to keep hanging out with Jane and you never know what feelings develop.
I went out a few more times with Jane in a group setting and 1on1 and there is definitely no physical attraction. However, our colleagues are gossiping like crazy that we are dating or a couple. Jane is texting me every day asking me to hangout and that she wants to spend more time with me. Jane is inviting me to her graduation where I'm the only friend she's inviting.
I've never talked to Jane about dating. Jane is moving back home at the end of June, which is 3 hours away. My plan was to wait until June and just let the problem solve itself. Is this the right course of action?
TL;DR: | Referred to date a colleague, but I'm not interested. I'm not sure how to let her down without hurting the work environment. She moves 3 hours away at the end of June. |
SUBREDDIT: r/askwomenadvice
TITLE: Asked a girl for her name, shyness drowned out her answer.
POST: She (24?) has been coming in to my small restaurant for a year or so. She wears glasses; which is a turn on. I (31) also like how she occupies herself during her meal - If she's reading a funny book (the books are all mine, which i leave on a shelf for the customers) she'll laugh out loud.
I have been single for 4 months. I started smiling and talking a little more to her. 2 weeks ago she handed me a credit card and I said "It's funny you should hand me this, I was just about to ask you what your name is." That is when a tsunami of shyness started rolling in. Things started to get a little blurry. She answered "that's my sisters card, her name is Sarah*". I barely got my name out along with "we always say hi and smile at each other so..."before saying some silly things that made me more self-conscious. I figuratively collapsed in shyness. Her sister walks in, and at that point there is no chance of recovery (2 people is overwhelming). I hand her her meals to go, she says "thanks Shawn". I don't say anything. She's walking out the door, "bye Shawn". Nothing from me. I was too shy and I hadn't caught her name. How do I handle it next time she comes in?
TL;DR: | Asked her for her name, didn't quite catch it. May have come off rude, shyness is my excuse. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationship_advice
TITLE: I [19/m] am too attached to my [20/f] girlfriend.
POST: We have been dating for 2 years and were talking on the phone the other night and she told me that I don't give her enough space to be her own self outside of our relationship. I usually text/call her a fair amount because I am working in a different city than I usually live for the summer. Because of this I don't have any friends in the area and feel lonely sometimes. I see her pretty frequently on the weekends so long distance isn't the issue. I know that I give her too much attention and feel like if it continues it will drive her away.
I think that part of the problem is that she has been hanging out with a guy friend of hers a lot over the summer and I've been getting jealous for no reason at all. I'm friends with him too and she has assured me that they are entirely platonic (which I believe), but I somehow manage to make myself jealous regardless of this fact.
Needless to say if I continue smothering her I will ruin our relationship, I've tried picking up hobbies and occupying my time; however, she always seems to be on my mind. I want to be someone outside of our relationship, and I know she does too.
Right now she is gone in Haiti for 10 days so I have been using it as a sort of exercise to get myself worrying and thinking about her less. Little progress has yet to have been made. I know I shouldn't need to talk to her all the time, that's just not healthy. Any advice?
TL;DR: | I am too attached to my girlfriend and need to give her more of her own space, but i'm struggling with it. |
SUBREDDIT: r/relationships
TITLE: I [24F] desperately need to stop being hung up on this guy [25M].
POST: Long story short: I met a very long-time internet friend for the first time while away on business this summer. Things went really, really, really well. So well, in fact, that we talked very seriously about making it into something real. Eventually, we reluctantly decided it wasn't the best idea to pursue that.
And it really sucked for a few days. And then a few weeks. And then a few months. And while it has gotten less acutely painful, I still spend way too much time thinking about him and the situation.
We've barely communicated at all since things fell through. I'm keeping as busy as I can with life. I try to spend time with friends and I'm dating someone new now. And yet, he still occupies an unhealthy number of my mental cycles.
I figured time would make things better, but it certainly hasn't so far. I don't really know what else to do. As much as I'd love to be around this person, I don't want to spend the rest of my life feeling this way if that scenario is not a possibility.
TL;DR: | I'm hopelessly hung up on this guy. What can I do to change that beyond what I've already tried? |
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