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What did the mommy broom say to the baby broom? time to go to sweep.
true
Why did the seamen cross the road? because i wore the wrong pair of socks this morning.
true
Watch this anti-gay activist try to explain the supreme court to megyn kelly
false
'the master' clip: nsfw bit features joaquin phoenix being tested (video)
false
Mcdonald's musical ad targets hispanics with princess of bachata
false
Someone spoofed michael wolff's book about trump and it's comedy gold
false
Obama tells congress to 'do its job' on zika
false
How many cops does it take to push a black man down the stairs? none......he fell
true
What's the difference between a baby and an onion? i cry when i chop an onion.
true
I'd also tell you a joke about how my balls hang. . . but that's too low.
true
If only steve irwin wore sun screen. he could have been protected from harmful rays.
true
Theater: debra messing's broadway debut -- how'd she do?
false
Why does donald trump insist on more military spending?
false
Where do cows go to hang out? the slaughterhouse. emphasis on **hang**.
true
Coming soon to an arena near you: vin diesel in 'fast and furious' live
false
Tickets for the wheelchair races are selling out...seats are going fast!
true
Life is like a box of chocolates... it can be a load of shit.
true
St. vincent has given female guitarists a fantastic gift
false
I'm still a little pissed we didn't get to keep the tail through the evolutionary process.
true
Friday's morning email: top democrats say 2016 nomination rigged for clinton
false
I guess traffic is spending the night because it brought its jammies.
true
I had sex with a girl in an apple orchard, i came in cider.
true
30 seconds into taylor swifts new song i started hoping kanye would interrupt her.
true
Kareem abdul-jabbar: donald trump's response to khizr khan 'showed his lack of compassion'
false
How faith and love paved the way to a family for these dads
false
Did you hear about the mutant that had a sex change? she's an ex-man
true
5 trends this fashion editor won't try (photos)
false
The jerk store called. *removes hat* i'm afraid there's been an accident.
true
How donald trump empowers religious extremists all over the world
false
A mysterious stranger has been leaving flowers at this boy's grave for decades
false
The queen doesn't like to speak about the paedophiles in her court... they're all touchy subjects.
true
How olivia pope has redefined leadership for young women
false
How many vampires does it take to open the curtain on daylight? just one with depression.
true
What does god do whenever he gets frustrated with jesus? he gets out the bible belt!
true
Not to sound like a broken record, but moooon rivrivrivrivriver.
true
What did cinderella say when she got to the ball? *chokes*
true
How long does it take to build a castle? a fortnight
true
Members of the backstreet boys and *nsync are teaming up for a 'zombie western' horror film
false
Just broke my very own personal record of most consecutive days without dying.
true
What did the mentally handicapped kid get on his math test? drool
true
Even wild animals are hooked on the winter olympics
false
How do you deal with radical islamists? you square them.
true
Next year i'll give up spreadsheets for 40 days and 40 nights... it's going to be excel lent
true
Taxpayers don’t want to pay for lawmakers’ sexual misdeeds, but alternatives pose problems
false
Why do cowgirls walk bow-legged? because cowboys always eat with their hats on.
true
Did you hear that hiv isn't spread by a virus? yeah, it's spread by a fun guy
true
The art of y: an interview with fashion designer catherine litke
false
Jill stein's recount effort raises millions in just hours
false
What do alexander skarsgard and ikea have in common? swedish meatballs
true
Hmm, there may be a link between vaccines and political pandering
false
Amber rose reveals why she defended kim kardashian's nude photo
false
Resistance begins at home: fighting federal immigration policy on the local level
false
One liners i'm at a vfw and i want dirty raunchy one liners to tell, racism allowed
true
There are two fish in a tank. one says to the other, how do you drive this thing?
true
Lyme disease danger zones are spreading throughout northeast & midwest
false
Obama brokered secret deal between 2 arab states that could help end libya's civil war
false
Table talk: how young is too young for tv?
false
If your partner gave you a survey to fill out after sex
false
Beyoncé saved herself from falling during her halftime performance
false
Drinking could cause memory loss. or even worse, memory loss.
true
I'm a very private person - people who are on back to back reality shows
true
How to clean your mattress with baking soda
false
This clown fad is getting out of hand.... they are even running for president of the united states.
true
I've haven't eaten gluten for a week... and i, personally, already feel *so* annoying.
true
Hungary should take over turkey if asked why, they would say because we are 'hungary'
true
Cruise travel: 11 ways to save on your next trip
false
Volunteer network helps haiti cope with disasters year after year
false
I just got a new job working for r.e.m. . . . i'm expecting a generous michael stipend.
true
That mischievous kid on 'ahs' is the son of an o-town band member
false
Snapchat's bob marley filter called out for being 'digital blackface'
false
What's the difference between whitney houston and my car? my car can hit 50
true
Good samaritans offer homes, cars and kitchens in cruise ship disaster town
false
What did the zero say to the eight? nice belt, fuckface.
true
G7: greece eurozone presence is in 'all our interests'
false
If jfk could see the state of this country... it would blow his mind.
true
Where did suzy go when the bombs fell? everywhere.
true
Felix baumgartner photos: pictures of sunday's record-breaking parachute jump (photos)
false
U.s. charity loophole enabled trading of 1,300 endangered animals
false
4 homes masquerading as strip clubs and nightclubs (photos)
false
Tried to cover miles davis but failed miserably... i kind of blue it
true
The tortoise and the hare is a classic story about how people who like to run are awful.
true
Huffpost rise: what you need to know on april 8
false
Defiant rebels attack ukrainian forces after ceasefire begins
false
Tragic: in the world every 60 seconds... ...one minute passes.
true
Striking photos show israelis standing still for holocaust remembrance day
false
This tumblr of loved ones’ final texts reveals the beauty of ordinary lives
false
Check out our favorite politics books of the year
false
10 things you should know about the 2015 uk election
false
Smithsonian head: government should take lead in arts funding
false
What do you do when your dishwasher stops working? slap her
true
Who has the biggest ass in the kardashian family? kim. she has kanye.
true
To screw in a light bulb, how many yodas does it take?
true
Paul ryan threatens to use power of the purse ahead of potential shutdown
false
My friends keep telling me to stop impersonating butter. but i can't. i'm on a roll now
true
My father was a nun whenever the judge asked him for his occupation he would always answer nun.
true
Matthew mcconaughey for president 2016: make america alright alright alright again!
true
The most pet-friendly vacation spots in the u.s.
false
Did you here the joke about the dead guy? nevermind, it's time has passed.
true
Country living appraises a 1950s jiffy-way egg scale: what is it worth?
false
Donald trump is making american consumers great again
false