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Restarting Zoloft
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Hey friends. Just looking for some reassurance. I was on Zoloft for 10 years. Had my 2nd baby and experienced terrible postpartum anxiety and depression. Thought the Zoloft wasn’t working so I switched to lexapro. Lexapro caused bad fatigue and weight gain. Then switched to Prozac. Prozac caused sweats and worsening panic attacks.
I have restarted Zoloft. I was on 100mg for 2 weeks and recent increased to 150mg. My anxiety has not improved. I do have moments and periods of feeling better but overall still very anxious. Has anyone been through a similar experience? Does it get better?
I am in therapy and doing CBT.
| 1 |
how do i get help with no money
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Im 22m i hsve bo money just got laid off and lost my insurance, i need mental health help before i spin out of controll are there any free alternatives to therapy
| 1 |
Feeling a need to cry after exercise
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I’ve never been an active person, always preferred to stay home and play video games or watch some TV shows or movies, but for some time now I wanted to start working out ‘because it’s good for you and your mental health’. And it leaves me feeling more ‘broken’ so to speak, because every time after I exercise I feel an urge to cry and I feel way worse about myself and my body (I’m overweight and never been fit, so my body isn’t able to do a lot of stuff). I guess I’d love to hear I’m not alone in this and other people feel like this too 😅
| 2 |
Day dreaming and Catastrophising
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I'm 21. I tend to make fake scenarios and put myself position where I want to be, by daydreaming. This is making me overthink everything I do. The fake scenarios I make are by taking people from real life and imagining them with me. I talk to myself, sometimes laugh and make different facial expressions based on the scenario. This keeps increasing my expectations in real life with the actual person. I see the tree decision graph and explore all the permutations in every scenario I make in my head. So this makes me see things quite differently than normal, scared of worst case scenarios in real-life and overthink everything. I have been doing this for years probably 5-6 years, and this is taking a toll on my mental health and also profession life.
Is there anything that could help me get out of this?
| 2 |
I'm so tired.
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I'm being living like I'm alone for most of my life. Most people know me as this happy, perfect, top of the world type of person. My family expects a lot from me, I feel alone most of the time since I feel like I'm the only one who's trying, and no one notices how I am.
I feel like a ghost at times, everyone knows me on the surface, and I feel like no one truly understands me. I'm so tired. There were times when I thought about ending it all, these intrusive thoughts keep coming, and somehow, everytime I feel happy, I just know that something bad is going to happen next.
It doesn't help that my mother is just negative most of the time, everytime I go home, she is either in a good mood or somehow she's way too upset, that this isn't right or somehow we're doing everything wrong. She puts her own trauma onto us, and I hate the fact that I can't call her out on it since I care about her too much to hurt her.
Being the eldest, the weight of everything is heavy, I can't defend myself, and I always defend them from others. I lend a shoulder when they're sad, but I cry alone. I listen when they need someone to, but I talk to myself. The person I present to the world is someone that seems perfect, good at everything I do, with no room for mistakes. And the worse thing is, I can't even complain about it, I get to live the life that people wants. But I'm not happy, I don't want to be perfect, I don't want them to expect so much on me, I want to be cared for, I want someone to listen, I want to be childish, I just hope for god's sake that I get to be genuinely happy.
| 2 |
Online therapy covered by insurance?
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I’m looking for therapy that accepts insurance and is online. Better help doesn’t seem to have an option for that. Any recommendations?
| 1 |
Is it okay to wash my meds down with redbull?
| null | 1 |
Thoughts
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So i want to start by saying I do not have a clinically diagnosed mental illness or issue. I just wanted to share my mental state on life and things right now. So lately I’ve been wanting to be alone.. it sounds weird to say. but I’m in a relationship right now with an amazing person but I just get sort of obsessive and I feel like it’s causing me a lot of problems. Im thinking that I’m not ready for a relationship but I’m not sure. I miss life when I didn’t worry about the people who I spoke too nor get jealous. And I’m been feeling distant from her and all of my friends. I’m not sure if I actually have a problem or I’m just being a little bitch about everything. She’s all I really think about which only makes things worse. That’s just about it I would like some feedback on what y’all think bc this is the only platform I can really go to
| 1 |
do i need a therapist
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25F. English is my second language so please understand that I can't speak English very well. Im a affiliate marketing and a writer at night—Thats what I do for a living. Im a person who is minimalist and always want everything neat. Including my phone. I want my schedule to be on tract since im a busy person. I handle my self very well when it comes to work. But a year ago, my cousin move in with me and since im living with my grandma, I help her with raising the kids. My task is to tutor them and take care of them when the other is busy with their job. And since Im work from home, its fine with me. But recently, i have this habit of being overwhelmed and doubt myself every time. For example, i tutor my kids and we finished their module. I know that we already finished it but i will check it again and again to the poin that i think of it the whole day. Once I check it, i put it inside their bag and when im starting to do other task i will think about it and again, doubted myself if we really finished it. What if we didn't? What if its all inside my head?
The second one is DELETING APPS. YES. i work as affiliate marketer. So i need social media to network the products. But these past few weeks i started deleting apps because i think that i have too many. That i used to many apps. Take note that I only use Instagram, fb and tiktok to market my products. I use them for living. But i deleted them. Even the banking apps. I have two banks. But i widraw my money from other one and put the money into One bank account so i can delete the other apps i have. I deleted almost all of them until i only have 5 downloaded apps and i still feel like they're too much. Everything is too much. Please suggest something to me. Thank you so much.
Ps: I already did social media detox.
| 3 |
Spiritual Discord - Mental Health
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I recently started a spiritual discord and there's a section on there where you can ask for advice about your mental health, a place to vent and get whatever might be in your system out, and a place to open up. If you're interested:
https://discord.gg/2WMxXsSuFg
| 1 |
URGENT PLEASE Can someone explain to me what is happending
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I’m (F) 14, I’ve been feeling like shit this year. I’ll try to explain what I’m feeling the best I can: I CANT focus. I CANT really understand what people are saying. what I’m saying won’t make sense. I CANT really read well anymore. My spelling sucks now. I DONT have motivation to do anything. I go to sleep at 4:30 and wake up at 10 I go back to sleep 30 minutes after 10 and wake up in the middle of the night go to sleep again wake up etc etc then I wake up at around 5:00am and am still exhausted and I go to sleep, repeat. I’ve been frustrated all the time. I’ve lost my period. My back hurts alot. My mind is constantly all over the place. When I’m talking to someone my mind will be somewhere else. It feels like my mind and body are 2 different things. Sometimes I feel like I’m in a movie and nothing is real. I’ll black out and completely forget what I said. I feel hopeless.I’ve been having a lot of suicidal thoughts. I’m constantly exhausted. If I’m left alot i find it Hard not to have my mind go into 80 directions.I feel constant stress, like I can never have a break. I constantly feel guilty. I dint feel like I deserve anything I feel like a horrible person all the time.I sometimes hear a faint screaming in my head. Recently I find myself getting irritated easily. I still have my Optimism and I’m still pretty extroverted.but it’s because I always have to be the one supporting others if im not optimistic then… no one will be… I don’t get treated great by my family,teachers,or peers… I DONT feel like anyone cares about me..
| 11 |
Be careful with Telehealth and Don't take everything Personally
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Because a new doctor you're seeing for the first time via telehealth does not know you. I had two really bruising experiences when I had to get a new psychiatrist and since so much has changed during Covid, practitioners who used to work in person are now remote. And when I say remote, the word has a double meaning, as far as I can see. These psychiatrists are at a safe remove from us and our emotions.
The first telehealth lady told me to "clean up my profile" (she meant my ADHD meds) and go look for a new psychiatrist. I have bipolar disorder and ADHD and My psychiatrist of 23 years had retired. I knew on good authority that this telehealth nurse practitioner writes meds for ADHD a plenty because my pharmacist referred her and told me so.
Next Step: To find a new doctor, I used Psychology Today's "Find a Psychiatrist" search tool and emailed a few doctors who only do telehealth. My skepticism was matched with an unsavory experience with a huge telehealth provider, a 2 year old startup out of New York City called Talkiatry.
This is not to say Telehealth is bad, but if I'd taken everything that happened between Talkiatry and I personally, I'd be in terrible shape.
I had four encounters with Talkiatry, plse let me know what you think about this if you watch my essay. It's not monetized, it's just public service. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfJSCG-NHKE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DfJSCG-NHKE)
| 1 |
Does anyone have this problem with hyper sexuality when linking with trauma?
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So I have bipolar 2 disorder for a long time I’ve suffered with what I can only describe as periods of hyper sexuality it generally tends to come when I’m super depressed I get super horny, it’s been like this since teen years
I was SA @14 scared to come out as gay spent a few years toying with the idea of being “bisexual” then came out eventually was SA by my so called best friends husband he knew about it and blackmailed his husband right up untill divorce but refused to stick by me which has really fucked with me in some dark ways! That was a month before meeting my SO
Been in a relationship with my SO for 3 years and at the beginning it was amazing the sex was none stop I did spend the first year of our relationship unmediated and unfortunately I trauma dumped massively now I realise that was a huge mistake! however now the sexual interactions have slowed down as such we have tried to find more ways to be intimate rather than just sex. Trust me I’m aware there are so many ways to do this and we do do so, there are certain ways I have allowed him to touch me now that I didn’t because of my previous issues however every-time my mood dips I become super horny, my sex drive spikes through the roof, crazily! Like I’m on heat the problem is my poor SO carnt keep up I feel like he would rather give his hand more attention because it’s easier than me sometimes which leaves me feeling sexually repulsed by him not like I don’t find him attractive or love him but if my mind runs to places like he would rather pleasure himself than with me without being to graphic you get the drift and it leaves me feel gross and unattractive effectively leading onto the fact I categorically won’t have sex with him for days on end even though my sex drive is through the roof at that point and it’s starting to effect me hugely
Does anyone struggle with this issue it’s starting to lead me to believe I don’t function normally what so ever! It’s becoming an effecting factor of my life
My brain my thoughts my insecurities
If so what did you do to help, currently do emdr along side trauma therapy and talking therapies im on a mood stabiliser which I seriously am doubting is the correct dose at this stage
HELP!
| 1 |
TW ED: Am I developing an eating disorder
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I (26F) have always been a healthy size. Im not sure what happened but recently I picked up two sizes and I cant fit in any other clothes.
Its hit me like a bus and ill spend hours just thinking of my weight and crying.
I decided to hit the gym and now Im working out 5 days a week. I also stopped eating meat and I am restricting my calories by a lot.
Im not seeing any improvement. Im avoiding scales.
I feel so alien in my own skin I hate it. Will it get better? I think Im developing a bad relationship with food because Im really hungry but I cant seem to get myself to eat without being guilt ridden.
Will this get better?
| 1 |
I don’t want to stay here at any given time
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sitting in my bed constantly and the only urge I ever have is to run away from everything that’d tie me to myself, my life and everything/everyone around me. It’s like a desperation, a surge in my legs to leave and see what’s come of the new areas I’d stumble across. At least it’d be different from the same four walls and the same interactions every day
| 1 |
Feeling like the worst of the worst
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i fully understand people struggle, and to different degrees, affecting the way we perform and what we’re able to accomplish at often times. despite the people struggling more than me being able to keep a relatively steady life, I can’t get out of the house, I’ve missed 3 years of schooling with little sign of change, and nothing seems to be going right outside of those things either. it just looks like other people have more of a hope at a future than I do, and I’m just gonna slowly rot away without ever beating the challenges before me
I don’t know what to do at any given time anymore
| 1 |
i feel like i’m spreading myself so far in my friend group and i’m sacrificing myself
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full disclosure, i’m a “recovering abuser” when it comes to my friend group. i try to be here as much as i can for my friends because they’ve struggled to be here for me in my own times but on top of my own progression/lows i can’t feel like i’m doing any of them justice. im really struggling to be a good friend but at this point i’m on the brink of shutting down.
| 1 |
I’m on a suicide watch…
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I’m on a suicide watch and my friend I have not know for awhile is watching me.
I don’t know what to do how to act or what to say..
So backstory the last several months have been bad…i moved out of my mom’s house for the first time 3 hours away for college. I have an awful job that does not allow me time for friends Or school (like that itself is a whole paragraph of shit) i have no friends i got a cat who turned out to feral and is attacking me. And this friend who is watching me overstimulates me sometimes but because she the only friend I have right now I keep her close
Anyway I’m also high because idk how to cop
| 2 |
Can anyone guide me please
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Really lost for words to be honest but I need somewhere to vent with this..
So I have just had possibly the worst breakup of my life, everything was going so well we had some wonderful experiences the issue was both our mental health, she tho had the worst anger she would shout at most things. We got pregnant and it was lovely but sadly she miscarried and I think this effected us both really bad but we didn’t understand it. She had just moved in and started a new job a month ago, and she has now told me she has feelings for this guy at work and that she really wanted to see where it went as he really liked her too and he was “normal” So she decided to bin off our 2 year relationship for this guy she barely knows,
I myself am really struggling as she has left our house on the day to go to his she has told me she hasn’t slept with him and he offered to sleep on the sofa but my head will not let me believe all that… I have not many friends and none that are in my area I’m pretty much house bound with my mental health but could leave the house with her as she made me feel safe I just don’t know what to do anymore I’m on a 3 year waiting list for therapy but there’s nothing I can do to make this sooner I read self help books and stuff like that but that’s about it I don’t know where to go or what to do now i hope someone sees this.
| 1 |
2 year burnout
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It's been 2 years since my burnout started as well as periods of making it worse but noting I do seems to help getting over it. I don't know what to do anymore.
| 3 |
I don't want to be alone with my thoughts
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I just had a fight with my mom... And even though I'm on medication, my thoughts are running away from me. I don't like them and the fight was about old stuff but she keeps saying things didn't happen that way and cannot accept blame for anything. HELP!!
| 5 |
Feeling the blues? Here are some simple reminders to boost your mood and not feel low. Emotions can be overwhelming at times. To avoid feeling down, one must follow a healthy diet, connect with others, and prioritize self-care.
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Do a breathing exercise
Listen to your favorite tunes
Eat healthy meals
Spend time in nature
Spend time with family
Talk to a friend
| 1 |
I can't connect with people.
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I work in a nursing home and all of the old people love me, I have a few friends, I still speak with my mother and I even have a girlfriend but all of my relationships are incredibly surface level. In public I have the personality of a public service worker, chipper and ready to help. With my friends and my family I have a more jokingly smug and confident personality. I'm someone people feel comfortable coming to with problems, I'm considered a close friend by the bulk of my friends.
I have ever reason to feel close to the people around me but I can't. I feel like an outsider looking into all of my relationships, I can barely comprehend people actually giving a shit if I died. I run a dnd group and they gave me a gift after my cat died and I had to cancel a session because I was sad. I could barely comprehend that they would care enough about me to get me something. I can't touch the idea that my girlfriend loves me, and I don't know if I can get myself to give everything to the relationship. I can say all of the right things, help her through problems, make her feel loved and cared for but I can't accept that she would care if I died tomorrow. I literally can't comprehend the fact that others care about me to the point if I'm faced with the fact someone cares about me and I can't explain it away as just going through the motions I have panic attacks. I just don't know what is wrong with me. I want to connect with people and feel loved and cared for, I have no reason not to feel that way right now but I just can't. Everything is just so surface level, I can't even fully let my therapist in and I'm paying him to help me with that stuff.
I wonder if I'm capable of a deeper connection at all anymore or if this is just my life. I long for a deeper connection, I want someone who makes me feel safe and cared for so badly. I just can't allow myself to have that I suppose. It feels like I'm broken in a way and I don't know how to fix it. I don't even know if I care enough to fix it either, other then the wanting for a deeper relationship I don't want to change any I have now. I like keeping the people I know at arms length, I don't think I could let them in if I wanted. It only sucks when I long for something more out of an imaginary relationship, other then that I feel rather apathetic about the whole thing. I just know it's wrong to feel like this and I just wish I knew how to start working on this. I feel such intense anxiety when people show affection in a way outside of what I can't write off as social obligations based on the title of the relationship we have. I'm fine if my girlfriend buys me flowers on valentines day, I am fine with me getting random gifts just because something reminds me of her but if she ever did the same I think I wouldn't sleep that night. I would reject it but I would be up the whole night wondering why she would do that since its outside the social obligations. I would feel a lot of anxiety for absolutely no reason. It just sucks. I just want to know how to fix it, if I'm even fixable.
| 2 |
how do you deal with your sexual trauma?
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long story short im 22m have been molested by my dad multiple times when i was younger and i cant take this anymore, how do i bring myself to tell my mom? or how to even get it off my chest and talk to someone? as a man i feel like i shouldnt say anything but ive been dying inside for a while
| 1 |
I just want to feel wanted
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I’ve been doing a lot better on my mental health in the past year. I got sober, made my way out of an awful living situation, started therapy, and figured out his to manage my money. It’s made a huge difference and made it possible for me to get through a day without breaking down. I can see a future for myself for the first time.
Even though I’ve made so much progress, I feel like there’s always something that’s scratching at the back of my head. Sometimes it’s barely noticeable, and sometimes it’s all I can think about. Today it’s something that I just can’t get out of my head and I hope typing it out will help a little.
I don’t feel wanted. I have never felt wanted. I don’t think I am wanted by anyone but my father and my grandparents. Even though I know my dad loves me I can trick myself a lot of the time. Due to his struggles with addiction he was in and out of my life a lot when I was a kid. I know that’s not what he wanted, and I know that the reason he got sober was to get back to me. But I didn’t understand that as a child, and whatever impression I had back then is rooted pretty deep in my mind. My mother moved out of the state when I was 15, and most of the friends I’ve had in my life have up and disappeared with no explanation.
The friend I have now are so distant. It’s been better with them at points, but it never seems to last long. They’ll invite each other to events and leave me out. Sometimes they talk about their plans to go have fun together right in front of me like I’m not even there. They won’t hang out with me unless someone else is coming or if we’re having band practice. I reach out so much and I try to be supportive and I try to make sure I’m open and honest with them but nothing ever changes.
Sometimes it makes me wonder if there’s something seriously wrong with me that I’m blind to but everyone else can see. What is it about me that makes everyone want to pull away? I know everyone goes through their own shit, but I don’t understand why I’m always the one left behind, or why I’m the one left cleaning up the pieces.
That’s all. Thanks for reading
| 3 |
Got laid off from my job, seriously feel so heartbroken i dont know what to do
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I was laid off from my company where we were making an experimental airship and I was part of the ground crew here based in Ohio. The main plant is in California where we would travel for training and stuff, for 8 months and spent and hung out with all of them and became so close to them, along with just having an amazing time being able to visit my home state and having a blast every day I was at work.
I got laid off, for some stupid fucking reason I was one of two from our ground operaations team while they STILL have a poistion open for my job that they laid me off for in california...
I have SO many emtions I am going thorugh right now. Anger, confustiom and sadness. Mostly so much sadness, as I don't get to be with my ground operations team/family anymore.
How the fuck do I deal with this? I can't see a therapist since mt insurance will run out by the time I ge tto see one.
I still talk to them, but I keep having dreams that I still work there and that all of our trips that we were planning are still happening with them.
It feels like I was left on the side of the road and I am just watching them drive away.
I so desperately want to go and work for them again just so I can hang out with my friends and be happy again
it was the first time in my career that I had a job i enjoyed so fucking muchh
but now its done, over, gone.
what do I do? wtf?
it feels worse than a breakup, one of the worst feelings ive ever had. I hate this so much
how can I make this stop.
please.
i just want to beg for my job back
i would do anything to get back what I have lost
its literally so painful
| 2 |
I just don’t get it
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I have a great life I just don’t appreciate it. I have a fantastic job. I have an apprenticeship starting in September. I have my own car. I have a amazing girlfriend and amazing family. I just don’t feel happy. I constantly feel exhausted and just not having it. I don’t know why and I don’t know what to do. I want to be able to appreciate it. And I am grateful for what I have and am a very respectful person I just don’t feel happy and appreciate things. I don’t know what to do and I just don’t get it.
| 2 |
i can't stop fighting
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Hi, 19M ( i am brazilian so sorry if my english is a little bit rusty).
i can't stop fighting people cuz that is the only thing that make me fell alive and excited
| 1 |
I don’t know where else to turn
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I have been a long time lurker on Reddit (for a couple of years now) and tonight o decided to sign up and make a post because I don’t know where else to turn. I feel like I’m simultaneously imploding and comping undone at the seams. I don’t have a strong friend group and I don’t have coworkers because my job is solitary. I’m in a relationship and it doesn’t feel healthy and I keep trying to communicate and I just get told that I’m being ridiculous and that everything I want to talk about is nonsense. On the one hand, I feel like I’m being gaslit, but on the other hand I worry that maybe it is me. I just need some support and someone to talk to.
| 3 |
why have i started acting more childlike sometimes when im 20 years old and in college?
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i feel like this year i have started acting a lot more childlike when im in the privacy of my apartment. its not like i completely revert or wanna play with toys or anything its just i've gotten even more attached to a blanket my mom made me, to the point i've started calling it "blankie" in my head sometimes or jokingly with a friend (i've done it like once or twice, usually after i have a big freak out about the whole thing, i think i do it in those situations to make myself feel like its not a big deal). i almost always sleep with it and i take it home with me when i go from college. if i'm going somewhere and im spending the night, i take it with me if possible. i can go to sleep without it, but i just sleep better with it. i also always try and find the softest spots on the blanket and then stroke them over and over again. I like to smell it a lot, i find it really comforting. sometimes it makes me think of home or when i was a little kid and my old blanket. when i was little, i had a different blanket that was smaller, more child sized and i did a lot of the same thing with that one that i do with this one. one difference is back then i sucked my thumb, which i did up until late elementary school. if i remember correctly, i pretty much slept with that blanket until my mom made me this new one when i was in middle school (12 ish). i pretty much just transferred from that one to this one. and i feel like i've been getting worse about it. sometimes, even if i have plans, i dont want to get out of bed, i just want to lay with my blanket. and today, i had plans to watch a basketball game at a friend's house and i kept on fighting with myself about taking it or not. like i knew she wouldn't care, i just felt like i would start acting so much worse if i did. i feel like none of my friends have a "blankie" that they can't separate themselves from. i feel so stupid for acting this way sometimes.
another thing i have noticed myself doing sometimes is referring the my mom and dad as "mommy" and "daddy" in my head, even though I haven't called them that in probably 15 years. sometimes i just think about how much i want to go home and hug my dad real hard like he used to when i was little. idk if thats normal or what. and there are times where i wish i was a little kid again so i don't have to deal with some of my responsibilities or so i could get a do over. i find the second part kinda weird because yeah even though I have my struggles, I think i'm pretty happy.
idk if it will make any difference but i was diagnosed with pretty severe ocd when i was 8, and i've mostly been able to get it under control. i deal with self esteem issues and body image issues. my mom is a recovering addict, but my parents were never divorced. my mom is having some pretty major health issues due to her addiction, and my dad almost died from covid last year. i've been struggling with my sexuality for a while, but i think i'm finally coming to terms with it, even though my parents don't know yet. on top of all of that, i realized a close friend of mine had been manipulating me pretty much from the start of our friendship and then i've had some pretty severe drama going on in a club that i am very active in. so like i know i've been stressed, but is that why i'm acting this way? i have friends who are dealing with some of the same club drama (or even more of it) and other external stressors and they aren't acting like little kids. and like i said, i dont think i act like a child around others. idk whats going on. im just confused and concerned and don't want to stress my parents out even more.
| 1 |
Sometimes I just wanna disappear
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Ok let’s start this off with the fact that I’ve had the worst few months possible I’m crying while typing this I have no friends like at all idk if I’m the problem or the fact that I just pick shitty people to be around my parents constantly use me to benefit them and they can’t move a muscle when I need help but if I don’t help them they threaten to kick me out I’m on probation for weed but I can’t get my parents to take me to a doctor so I can get some kind of help so obviously I’ve been smoking weed cause it helps alot I failed a drug test for probation (my fault ) and I go again next week to find out what they will do I’m terrified that my girlfriend will leave me if they put me in jail I doubt they will or I hope not I’m 19 with a clean record and have 5 months left I have problems with my knees and. I can’t stand long so working a factory job or something like that isn’t an option but my parents tell me that’s the only job I’m gonna get but I don’t have a car and where I live I have to drive an hour away for any job really and they won’t help me get a car I depend on them to much and every time I try to have hope they will help me with something they let me down also I’m sorry for writing so much I genuinely don’t have anyone to talk to so I’m resorting to ranting to strangers in the internet it sounds silly but fuck it it’s worth a shot right we’ll back to the life story I’m writing and to add onto of everything my uncle passed away this week and my bio dad went to rehab I’ve been trying to save money but not having a job or even being able to get to one has a big effect on that I’m saving to move out to my girlfriend cause the long distance isn’t nice I want to be with her in person and my parents know how bad I want it but they keep taking what little money I have cause they need money for bills but I guess I understand that god I feel fucking embarrassed writing this noones gonna give a shit there a lot more to it but long story short my life is absolute shit and me trying to get somewhere where I’m wanted and people care for me isn’t working every time I get my hopes up it goes to shit and tbh it’s getting a tiring very very tiring thank you to whoever takes the time to read this I know I may not mean anything to anyone but one person in this world and no one really care about me in my small corner of the world but thank you if you read this the whole things a mess and I am a mess
| 2 |
My partner attempted to her end life on Monday. Looking for support, advice, and to get this story off my chest.
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TRIGGER WARNING, self harm, mental health crisis, graphic detail
———————————————————————————
I will not go into length about how we got here. Years of mental health concerns, issues with family, friends, relationships and work have lead us here. If you are curious I can answer questions privately.
On Monday, I was on a plane for a work trip for 6 hours, when I landed a I received a call from her best friend. She was in an ambulance on her way to the hospital. I dropped everything, ran off the plane, got in a cab and rushed to the hospital.
She ingested approximately 13,000mg of Bupropion (Welbutrin), which is substantially more than what is required to be fatal.
At first, she seemed okay. Tired, groggy, but she was awake and speaking to me and the paramedics. We called her family, she was able to speak with them briefly while we were waiting for doctors to attend to her.
This sleepiness and grogginess continued for several hours. These moments felt sad, but manageable. She was scared, sad and sick but she was okay.
About 4 hours later, the hallucinations and seizing began. Her eyes were permanently rolled back into her head, she couldn’t vocalize words but was attempting to speak. She was mumbling, panicking, screaming. She was terrified and didn’t know where she was. She attempted to run away from the nurses and myself several times, she tore her IVs out multiple times. I had to hold her down and call for nurses. Eventually, she had to be fully restrained in her bed. From this point on, she alternated between a deep sleeping state, seizing, convulsing and panic attacks. Every 5 minutes or so she would wake up screaming, struggling violently to get out of her restraints. I would attempt to calm her, holding her hand, telling her she is safe and we are going to be okay. She didn’t know who I was. She was terrified of me, the doctors and the nurses. Anyone touching her was met with violent outbursts. Seeing her look up at me with fear in her eyes, convinced I was going to harm her is something I can’t get out of my head. This pattern continued for over 24 hours.
After her panic attacks, her eyes would roll back, and she would fall back onto the bed and see a drastic reduction in heart rate and breathing. During a few of these moments, I thought she had died and broke down. But she’s a fighter, she made it through each one of these moments and kept fighting.
Eventually, she became aware enough to speak, somewhat. If she slowed down, and tried really hard she could vocalize a few words at a time. “Don’t take my organs” , “don’t cut me open” , “you aren’t (my name) .. what did you do with him?”. The hallucinations continued for another 12 hours, with her slowly becoming more able to speak, and being able to listen. After hours of talking her through the situation, she started to be convinced, I could see she was starting to believe it was me. I got her back. Slowly over the next few hours I was able to tell her the story, what happened to her, where we are, how long we’ve been here.
We are now 5 days after the incident, she was just medically cleared yesterday and is under psychiatric evaluation.
I have not slept, I can’t close my eyes without seeing her hurting and struggling. I couldn’t leave her alone in there for even a minute. Now that we have confirmed she is going to survive, I am coming to my own reality of what has happened, I am struggling with guilt, that I am feeling in need of support when she is the one who needs me more than ever.
I don’t know what to do… I am being strong and supporting her through this, but I feel like I am close to my own breakdown.
Tell me something to make me feel better.
| 10 |
im really falling towards suicide...
|
I cant take this loneliness any more.
I have no social life at all and have not really had any during my teen age and 20s. In my late 20s now and i lost my youth to being alone
I wrote this long post to somewhere else and it probably express situation better:
Firstly im very lonely and have been most of my life and feel really miserable and frustrated about it.....
Im in late 20s and i basically had no any social life in my youth teen age and 20s.
I rarely go anywhere so getting friends or finding girl who would fall in love, seems impossible and unlikely to happen....
I just dont have any place to go to where i would meet some one..
I have rarely places/events happening.... and some times like 2 times now row i could not go to these live shows because tickets were all sold out.
(Im now talking about live shows of rappers performing etc) Should have bought the tickets earlier smh....
Right now theres a event starting at this moment in night club i planned to go to... and instead im just laying here in ped trying to sleep depressed and frustrated writing this,,, again missing a big possibility to meet some one.
Same happened few weeks ago. Drived hour to see this rap show only be told at the door that all the tickets are sold and then hour back home depressed.
Theres not much of these events of my style and dont know if any will happen in many months now after this one..
These rap show events are only place where i feel like i could have a change to find friends of my kind and possibly some one who would became love of my life.
What else place and situation there is for me to socialise if not these rare genre specific events???
I cant figure anything else......
I am really in to old school hiphop so i really only go to bars and clubs when theres some rappers of that style having show and do not like to go bars and clubs other than that.
Here is no clubs or bars of this genre.. only rare shows every now and then so have to wait months.
I have really no friends or any social circle so meeting new people is really hard and rare.
Well I do have coupke friends kind of but they live in other city and other country and im so bad at being social i have no idea what to message to them although i really want to talk to them......
I just have no social skills and no idea what to say...
Im very introverted and have trouple trusting people because of some not so nice things i have experienced.
I also have no job or im not in school or such,,,, so i have no channel to meet people through and make friends and find love.......
I tried to get in to this vocational technical school for photography but of course i was not chosen as always.......
I have hobbies but no social hobby..
I just always wanted to have couple friends in my life i can hang out with and find some nice girl yo fall love with... but my youth just flew through my eyes alone.........
It feels horrible and im not sure how long i can handle this anymore.....
Some say you will get used to be alone but thats bs. I have been alone most of my life and now in my late 20s i feel just as miseraple being this lonely as i was feeling 15 years ago......
All i want is couple good friends or at least one and find some nice girl to fall in love with.
Thats all i ask.....
Im very much lone wolf infj type introvert guy that likes to have own time alone,,,, but i never wanted to be this lonely.
I was very broken mentally all my life so far and that made me loose any change to have normal life....
My life is a failure......
All i wish is just that i find friend and love..............
But where i could find them when i have no place to go to, no social sircle, ,,,, no any channel to meet anyone????
So there no really place to go to make social skills better either...
Im just extremely frustrated, depressed and wishing some miragle to happen and find some one.....
I cant take this life long lonelines anymore and im pushed in edge of,, well you may quess what........
| 3 |
I can’t seem to figure out if I’m right or wrong here. TW: physical abuse
|
My girlfriend and I are getting ready to move in together to a new place. We signed the contracts a couple days ago. We’re both disabled, but she’s completely disabled whereas I work 50 hours a week. She has aphasia and auditory discrimination so it makes it hard for her to speak, find words, use correct syntax and understand other people. I have to be extremely patient and stop everything I’m doing when she’s speaking, especially if she’s struggling.
Tonight she was asking me about a response from a friend on IG and she was struggling to find a word. As she was struggling she was moving her palm up and down, in that way that is commonly understood as “what is it? What is the word?” I said what I thought it was and she got quite upset.
It’s worth mentioning that somehow I screwed up my wrist while working. It hurts really badly and I have it bandaged up. When my girlfriend gets frustrated she gets physical sometimes. It’s nothing major, it’s like tapping me really hard in the chest, or grabbing my arms angrily nails first, but this time she was carelessly throwing closed fists. She hit me right in my injury pretty hard.
She proceeded to get angry about how I had spoken while she was thinking, I explained I was responding to her hand signal and just not thinking, and she kept explaining why she was upset. I told her that when you hit someone, whether you meant to or not, especially if it’s in an injury, it’s time to stop talking about whatever you were talking about. I just wanted her to apologize, make sure I was okay, and act sorry and tell me it wouldn’t happen again.
Despite me telling her this she said “I’m sorry but…” and went back to talking about how she was upset with me. I kept explaining this wasn’t okay, I really needed her to be more concerned about hitting me in my injury. I was trying explain how bad it sounds if I told someone else about it but she cut me off and exclaimed “what are you even saying?!?”
I got angry, which I never do, and said “no, this isn’t acceptable! You hit me” She walked away and went in the other room. I have to work in 4.5 hours and I’m pretty upset, but I want someone else to tell me if I’m making sense.
| 1 |
Do you have experience with help groups?
|
A neighboor suggested my dad, my sister and I to go to a help group to overcome the death of my mother. How are these? We're pretty close as a family and we don't relate much to strangers so I doubt we will "try and see".
| 3 |
Hopeless feeling
|
Hi,
I don’t regularly post anything online but right now I feel so low and down and have been having suicidal thoughts and it’s feeling like it’s going faster and more intense in that regard.
Here’s what’s up. I’m an almost 40yr total fuck up in life. I declared bankruptcy due to cocaine and alcohol addiction and now live with my elderly father and work a shit job that makes shit money and I cannot get credit or an apartment or anything even if I did rush back into a higher paying position (I used to work more serious jobs before my mental health derailed completely). I feel like cause of my past addictions no one will ever fully trust me(family mostly) and I will always be an addict to them.
I also have severe anxiety and depression despite taking meds which also makes me addicted to weed cause it’s the lesser of evils vs cocaine/alcohol which I no longer partake in however I won’t lie I’ve had slips doing small amounts of cocaine or alcohol just not to the extent of past binges/near overdoses/etc however I know both are horrible for me but I just get to such a dark place and it seems as if it’s my only escape.
It is also a brutal winter here so I’m barely working and basically trapped in the house with my father who makes sure to let me know all the time how much of a piece of shit I am. I have no money to get my own place and the street would be my only alternative. Basically my whole life he’s been very mentally abusive to me and likely part of the reason I grew up how I did. It’s affecting me very badly and I wish I could just jump off a fuxking bridge and drown and let go of this shit life I lead however I know it would kill some others I love.
| 1 |
am i ok?
|
i feel like most of the things i enjoyed doing, or the people i liked to be around before have just.. no more of my interest.
i feel like im getting dumber and dumber, ill look at one thing and then accidentally write it down without meaning to. what do i do?
| 1 |
How do you deal with having no one to talk to
|
How do you guys deal with having nonone you can talk to when your thought run wild and everything just feels like you life is shit cause like late nights fucking suck for me
| 1 |
feeling empty and sad
|
I'm feeling really empty and sad and I can't make it go away I just want to feel normal anyone have tips that can lessen these feelings?
| 2 |
I feel like I'm going insane and I need help but I don't know what to do or who to ask
|
I need help I feel like I'm going insane and I don't know what to do or if it's normal. A few months ago now I started having thoughts of killing people nothing to grim or strange so I thought nothing of it but since then it's gotten worse, it's become more detailed and grim also most importantly its to anyone and everyone even my family, I will be walking past them and have the thought of slitting their stomach open or shoving my fingers into their eyeballs for example but a few week ago I accidently saw a gore video on twitter and instinctively scrolled past it as fast as I could but the curiosity got the better of me and I began to watch it over and over again but ever since then I have been watching them on the daily because I have found it to help with the thoughts for example if I have a thought of killing or hurting a person or animal I will find a video similar to what I was imagining and watch it for 10 minutes straight but I have no idea of this is making them worse or helping me. Please someone give me advise or something I do not want to hurt anything or anyone especially not my family. Help.
| 1 |
friendship hurt by my MH, im focused on getting back to where it was. what do you guys think here?
|
a friend of mine (22F) was pretty close to me. we shared a lot of stuff, talked every day, spent a lot of time with each other at her place and working out. went like this for a couple months. (thats how long we knew each other)
she knows i wanted to date her at hte start but we just became friends. she wasnt looking for that.
i got kinda crazy with a schizophrenic episode. i never did anything inappropriate but i did try to get physically closer to her (arm around her and such) i was hurting pretty bad and was turning to her for comfort. i always asked before doing things like this but became impulsive
she has had bad experiences with guys so this was a boundary for her. i apologized when i was in a better mental space but i was kinda up and down, back and fourth. realizing this i gave her physical space, still messaged her but things got weird there with crap i was sending.
i got help, some meds, much better now. it was a month and a half that i stayed away from her as i worked on myself. now im talking to her again and things are very different. she says she isnt comfortable with us after talking to some friends about how we hung out.
she understands that i say i want her to feel safe, comfortable, at ease but.... we are just not there.
i feel that i want us to feel comfortable and build our trust back up to where we were. i dont have a lot of friends around here, neither does she and i truly feel we deserve to both have a trustworthy and safe friend in our lives.
i told her we could just talk for a bit, she agreed. i no longer seem to be a priority in terms of snapchat. we NEVER left each other unread and now... its days before she replies. i feel pretty damn hurt and its really hard on me.
she told me that she does not hold anything i did or said while my mental health stuff took a nose dive against me.
yet from my perspective we were great with each other. then i had this MH crap, then we spent a month or so apart, and now her views have totally changed on me when i never gave her any reason to feel uneasy about me.
input?
| 1 |
Being honest here
|
As a middle class white male living in the US, I will say, that of all groups of people, I have it pretty fucking easy. But so do middle class white females. Ok maybe you gotta be a little more careful when you walk through shady neighborhoods at night but, even then. In day to day life, we all got it fucking easy. This is perhaps the easiest generation to be alive in human history. Life is good!
| 1 |
Psychotic symptoms, im getting fed up
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To start, I'm not going to share my name or anything too specific considering this is the internet and everything is traceable somehow but I digress. Ever since I could remember i've always dealt with some form of paranoia and a wild, WILD "imagination". When I was little I used to see my favorite cartoon characters talk to me and cheer me on if I were doing something, it would even get to the point where I'd feel embarrassed changing because I didn't want them seeing me.(Kind of stupid but if you ever watched The Boys on amazon prime, it's basically what black noir had) This happened for a good chunk of my life until let's say around 3 grade however that was the point where I stopped seeing my favorite cartoon characters. Instead it got incredibly more intense. By 4th grade I started noticing that I became more weary of my room and overall everyday surroundings. I'd feel constantly watched, as if there were invisible cameras I just couldn't see or even invisible people watching me and I didn't know. To this day I still feel this level of paranoia which feels embarrassing to say but even now from time to time i'll get so fed up that i just cover my band posters with sticky notes because i cant bare the thought of them constantly watching and hearing me. I've also experienced a good chunk of both visual and auditory hallucinations. About every week or so, at least once I see something that doesn't belong or hear someone talking to me. Theres more I could reminisce about but that would take ages. I've been going to therapy for 9-10 years now (im currently 16) and just recently I was sent to a psychiatric facility (for reasons i wont get into now) but they did question me on a lot including these symptoms in which it seemed as if the shift of my reasoning to going to said facility was for these symptoms when it wasn't. They set me up with antidepressants hoping that the psychosis related symptoms were due to stress or depression however while taking them for months I realized that they did nothing for me and the symptoms continued. My therapist who I had since 7th grade recommended me psychologists who were experts in this sorta stuff so eventually I got around to having my psychologist now.
Just to add, when talking to my past therapist about what had been happening she too had noticed changes since 7th grade and had first brought up the potential idea of psychosis to the table. She and even my psychologist have yet to find out what psychotic related disorder I have considering it's hard as shit to get tested (with family and all that). Schizophrenia has been brought up however my therapist stated that it was probably unlikely considering my age and the fact that it doesn't run in my family (from what im aware of). So i'm really only here for advice. I honestly feel alone in all of this and it sucks that I don't have a basic understanding of what I have or whats behind everything. My friends are weirded out by it and my family flat out makes fun of me/treats me like a freak for bringing it up DESPITE THE FACT that my medical records and therapists notes have all mentioned the symptoms and actuality of whats possibly happening. So yeah, that's kinda it. If needed I can give more insight/info about the things I've experienced or do experience to get a better understanding but as for now I just need support. Any advice? Any possible leads? Anything is greatly appreciated.
| 1 |
DISHEVELLED
|
How can someone cognitively appear to be ‘normal’ & yet struggling so much to function in life due to Invega ie. can’t even shower, dress, clean or leave the house etc.
| 1 |
I cant understand my brain at all, i need help
|
so basically whenever i try to do something that changes my life in a good way i just get this kind of doubt that im gonna succeed and then just fail, i also suffer from procrastination(not knowing how to manage my study time and time in general), and i also just cant trust myself with anything, and i tried looking up my symptoms to see if i have some kind of mental illness but i couldn't find anything, im just really deppressed right now and dont know what to do, so can anyone please help me overcome these symptoms (im only 13)
| 3 |
Mental health
|
Anyone please help me and give me advice. I am so depressed and anxious. My family is falling apart and there’s nothing I can do to fix it. I am so overwhelmed and life just feels too hard right now. We are also putting down my childhood dog tomorrow and I am so upset. I could vomit from how anxious and sad I am. I don’t know how to cope.
| 1 |
Chillin
|
My life is fucking good right now. I don’t have to work which is the bomb and I don’t have to worry about rent or shit which is also great. I’m not living in a halfway house where I have to worry about people stealing my shit plus the stigma associated with being at one. I get to chill, watch tv, read, and make friends on discord all day. I mean, I’ve got it pretty good. Plus I don’t have to shop for groceries, I can just write what I want on the list and my parents get it for me. I have a good chunk of spending money from my last job. No stress, no drama. My biggest problem is boredom, hah! It’s great! Well, go green with envy guys, I’m living the good life over here, just wanted to brag but I hope y’all are doing good as well
| 0 |
I'm an adult who's been struggling with my mental health since I was 7. Any advice?
|
Ever since I was 7, I have always struggled with my mental health. I always thought it was just anxiety but now I'm 20 years old, I'm not too sure anymore. I tried loads of different anxiety medication/Supplements but nothing is working. I'm looking for any advice about what I'm going through for years.
Here is what I've been struggling with;
\- Certain sounds and lightning make me feel anxious/irritated. Example: My family has a parrot, and the squeaking goes through me so badly, had him for years and I'm still not used to it. I hate hearing people stomp their feet around my house. I can hear it in my room and it drives me insane. Some lighting in a room makes me uncomfortable.
\- I get irritated easily
\- My self-esteem is low
\- I always struggled with relationships and find it difficult to make a conversation with someone
\- I hate loud and crowded places
\- I can only focus on one task and get overwhelmed easily. Example: I work at a FOH and I struggle to do the till and drink at the same time, especially when someone orders hot and cold drinks. I always ask one of the other workers to help out or take over.
\- I always struggled with my education
\- When someone is speaking to me, I sometimes find it difficult on what they're asking me to do. This is a real struggle for work as well.
\- Sometimes I can't stand or sit for ages, otherwise I feel anxious
\- I talk really fast and my friends and family can't understand me
\- Sometimes change makes me feel uncomfortable, for example: if my daily routine changes or if something new happens. If I do something different, I feel anxious and keep thinking something bad is going to happen.
Any advice or suggestions on what this can be? I have been to the doctors about this, but I thought it was just anxiety, so nothing really has happened to help me.
| 2 |
How do I cope with my distress? My mum died and my dad got diagnosed with cancer.
|
My mum died unexpectedly at home, she had poor health but we didn't expect her to die. A paramedic told her to see her GP when she called and she died 2 hours later.
This has gone to being an inquest as her death was unexpected.
Anyway that dad I saw my CPN and Psychiatrist who said I was hypomanic and changed my lithium to higher. With everything that's gone on my mood has been terrible. I planned most of the funeral as my dad was too shocked. I took my dad for an ultrasound before the funeral and we got the results that my dad has liver cancer and we recieved a letter saying it was grossly abnormal. I am in so much pain and I want to shut down and sleep but I just keep going and then crash.
I wish my mum was here to look after my dad. I cry myself to sleep every night.
| 1 |
After death of my mother doctor says I can take some time off-work
|
After the death of my mother last year I was numb but months later I exploded, got really depressed like wanting to go with her but not attempting anything. I was hospitalized and now I am in both psychological and psychiatric therapy. The psychologist says it's not necessary for me to work, that my dad could manage but I feel I can't be doing almost nothing. I started job hunting but to no result should I really quit job hunting and be on vacation?
For more context I am 23 y/o graduated a year ago, my mom was 51 y/o, I hadn't even started job hunting when she died.
| 1 |
What do you do when someone will always view you a certain (negative) way and will never try to see the true you, no matter what you do?
|
I know I shouldn’t change myself for anyone, it just really frustrates me when I have to deal with members of my household always viewing me in a negative light and trying to paint me as an egotistical person when in reality they have never taken accountability for any wrongdoings and try to gaslight me into believing I am and will always be the problem, when it’s me that’s never listened to or given the benefit of the doubt.
| 1 |
Is it normal not to fear exams , but you not fearing it becomes a fear in itself?
|
I have my final boards tomorrow and for some reason I am not able to understand that , I feel cold mentally and that is like causing hindrance in my revision during the last crucial hours. Please does anyone go through this and is it normal and yea please wish me luck guys , Cheers!
| 2 |
Please Share With Me...
|
Hello, I grew up in a very abusive home. I'm doing a lot of inner healing work. I have done so much work over the last ten years on what I went through and the bad stuff.. I have recently started studying what safe people are, how those people look, act, interact, ect.
Could people please share stories of memories with their parents that really made them feel seen, heard, loved, cared for and brought them to know and understand a sense of self? This could be general or specific.
I am raising my own kids and I want to make sure I am doing my best, I know what I am not doing to avoid repeating the cycle, but I feel that maybe there is more good that I could do that I am missing because I never experienced it.
| 1 |
hello all. shot in the dark, but my biological mother killed herself when I was an infant. has any been in the same/similar situation. I have a lot of mixed feelings about it
| null | 1 |
I’ve been looking for a purpose
|
News is: GPT-4 is being released in a week. It’s gonna probably be in beta for a month or two then go public. That or the Germany article was a hoax. Regardless, AI is getting better, and I can’t wait for AGI. When will we have AGI? I don’t think it’ll be too long. When that happens the entire world will change.
I’m getting an apartment in a couple of months and taking classes at a local community college to get my associates. Before classes, I’m probably gonna work some crap job. I don’t have any friends rn and I haven’t in a while. That makes my life very depressing, and to top it all off, I exercise too much self control in social interactions and end up feeling drained no matter what I do. I have terrible sleep, and awful anxiety.
Truth is, it’s not so bad. I don’t do much, I don’t have a job or classes so I just hang around at home all day. I’m usually not too productive. I have some enjoyable discord conversations from time to time and make music. I also am almost finished setting up a trampoline in the back. I planned to do flips, hey, I might still do them, it’s impossible to say right now.
I have a good tv show rn. No good book, unfortunately. I make myself breakfast every morning and usually make myself lunch. I’m getting a therapist I think, sent out a bunch of emails just waiting on a response.
I’ve been getting more stable as well. I’ve been listening to less music, watching less short YouTube videos, pacing less. I just rubbed one out, but I’ve even managed to decrease the amount I jerk off. I’m not stable yet, but I’m way less neurotic.
I have a meet up group and created an event but I doubt anybody’s gonna show up. I’ll still go anyway. Aside from that, I really just need to get myself to be stable which could take a few weeks. Then, I should be able to make friends without the stress causing to be self-destruct. Shit…I’m tired every day but someday soon I’ll be stable. Then I’ll be able to be more social. After that I’ll learn how to decrease some of that self control so I’m not so depleted after the interaction. Then hopefully I move out, make some friends, get a part time jobs, grow some psilocybin (just kidding, or am I) and do flips off the dock over the summer. Then classes will come and that’ll take up my time. I’ll go through two years hopefully making one or two friends I can link up with once a week and do fun shit. Maybe we’ll reach AGI before I’m done, but until I’m done I should be chillin. Even if right now isn’t particularly enjoyable, it’s easy, and the future’s gonna be enjoyable if I continue to act stable. Maybe it won’t be bliss but it’ll be pretty good.
Yea, so that’s my life nobody’s gonna read this shit way too long so just skip it and how bout you
| 0 |
1 week without cutting myself.. woohoo ig
|
I still feel like shit n I wish this wasn’t a milestone I didn’t needa be proud of. Like before I did sh I wouldn’t think about the absence of it and I know that I’m probably gonna end up cutting myself in the next few days anyways so there’s no point being excited.
Eh oh well yay one week without cutting myself is still something ig
Edit: whoops
| 6 |
Sick of the sympathy seekers.
|
Absolutely sick and tired of people pretending their lives are falling apart as a marketing tool. Sad sacks of sh*t that only move merchandise because people are too stupid to see through their garbage. My stupid ass sits here trying to be actually good at something when I should just work on my “pathetic face” and come up with some fake tragedy to sell people.
| 1 |
How to learn to be alone and not get the overwhelming feeling of being lonely
|
Hey,
I have a problem dealing with loneliness. I do not know why but when I’m alone and don’t meet anybody for a couple of days I feel very anxious or in a very sad and negative state. This is a sensation that is overwhelming and makes me sad and I don’t know why it has to be this way. It feels like a heavy and a palpitating bad feeling in my head. I don’t want to feel this way but I don’t think that the solution is to meet someone to get rid of the feeling. I want to learn to handle this emotion and be capable to feel glad or okay when I’m alone. This feeling comes up to me every time when I’m alone and it has been this way for several years. Has anybody felt this ways and does anybody know how to be alone and not get this overwhelming and anxious feeling?
Thanks
| 2 |
I received my, Behavioral Health-Wellness Coach, Certification today!
|
Grateful to be making positive strides in my mental health journey, and helping others along the way!
| 9 |
I developed a mental health tracker based on AI technology
|
Hey everyone!
My app MindJourney: Mood Tracker is available on Google Play. It is based on facial recognition technology and helps to achieve emotional balance. With simple breathing exercises, you'll find it easier to pinpoint emotional triggers and cope with stress.
I'd love it if you could download it and leave your feedback by filling out an in-app form or on Google Play.
If you're interested, please find and download the app on Google Play or DM me to get the link.
Cheers!
| 0 |
Is it wrong to expect sympathy for being suicidal?
|
My main question is basically the title but I'll give a little context.
I am a 26 years old guy in Turkey. I recently moved to a new city. I am feeling alone and worthless. I think I am lacking people who care for me. I feel like nobody particularly wants to spend time with me. Ll the things I want are the things I am unable to get. I want to meet new people I want to make new people but I severely lack the social skills to do so. Also there is a girl I love but since I never had a relationship I dont know what to do or say often. Also I overthink things to the extreme so it doesn't help.
Mt shrink said that i m not autistic but I act autistic due to development problems I had during my childhood. He said socially I am around 5-6 years old. I had a terrible childhood. My father died when I was 8. And he wasnt around much before that. My mom was working to support two children she had. I was always shy and avoided most people. I have never made any friends myself. The few friends I have approached me first and basically forced the friendship.
So my point is I don't feel any worth in my life right now. All I have is problems and I lack the skills to make them right. And I am missing 20 years worth of social development. Part of me gave up, part of the still trying. I want it to be over but I am too chicken to do anything because it would mark my mom and my sister very upset (obviously). So I figured I need to touch two more graves first. But I want people to feel sympathetic to me because I am suicidal. Is this morally a wrong thing?
Sorrye it's a long read. Can skip to the last paragraph if you want.
| 1 |
How do you “feel” emotions in your body?
|
My therapist has told me to begin observing what I physically feel in my body when I am anxious or angry, etc. I feel I’m really good at being able to articulate what I’m feeling (I.e. anger, disappointment), but it’s very hard for me to articulate how my body physically feels in those moments.
I can articulate anxiety as feeling like I want to run, and sadness as tightening in my throat, or a pit in my stomach. But I’m not sure what else to notice. My therapist said something along the lines of some people saying they feel tingling in their hands, but I don’t think I feel “tingling” so much as just jittery.
How do people describe their physical responses when feeling emotions?
| 1 |
can you blackout from your emotions?
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This might be a dumb or obvious question but here is my little story, you don't have to read it if you know the answer already but if that's the case please specify.
I'm curious about this because I had something happened to me where I went from neutral to extremely exited and and happy, the problem is I can barely remember any details about it. I just know what happened, and i know that I felt really good and super excited. Later I had to sit down in private and bring myself together because I was kind of shaking and having I guess you could call a sort of, panic attack I guess you could call it. But I can't remember any details about what happened just the events that took place. I also am wondering if I could retrieve these memories as they are sentimental to me, it happened over 2 months ago so I also don't know if that could be possible. Thank you in advance for your support
| 5 |
I’m scared for my mental health
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I’m scared for my mental health every day I wake up at 3-5 am hear my cat screaming think they are outside can’t find them then have a mental breakdown just to find them but I’m scared one day I won’t and my cats have always been the first people I say things to, so they are like my therapists
| 1 |
I am so so so tired. I don't know how to cope.
|
I feel like this is all just adding up. I'm 18 years old, close to graduating and ready to go to college. As an angsty teen, of course I've had my fair share of moments or whatever but it's just gotten bad. I've refrained from doing this for a couple years now, but I used to just dig my nails into my arms and just drag it across. Not cutting, but just something to ground myself. I've stopped that, but now, for the past few years, there's been time where I just wanted to just become comatose to just feel rested.
Here comes the issue; got my college decision letters today, and I didn't exactly get in to the college I wanted. I got waitlisted, which isn't an outright rejection but it still hurts considering the possibility of me ACTUALLY getting in compared to all the other brilliant applicants, and my parents will still be disappointed in me. This was the ONE college I needed to get into so I wouldn't fail my parents and I couldn't even do that. So I've been crying for the past four hours and trying to talk myself down and get help from another person but they couldn't help and directed me here instead. So I'm ranting. I just wanna get magically injured and fall comatose and sleep forever. I don't know how to tell my parents and I'm scared to. I've been having consistent thoughts of just ending it all, but it's those intrusive thoughts speaking. I won't cause I promised myself to live for my friends and sibling if not for myself.
I don't know how to cope. Might be the academic validation and validation I crave from my parents that's the issue here. Since I became conscious of my actions, I live for their validation and I don't think that's healthy at all and I probably need an actual therapist but that's expensive. My parents want the best out of me like every good parent and I'm trying, I really am. I try to stay on top of my classes, get A's (I got yelled at for B's so...), do my work ahead of time. My sibling told me to stop living in fear of my parents but it's hard. I'm tired. I don't wanna try anymore but I know I'll still continue this same cycle over and over again. I love my parents and I feel they give me the world but I'm just so tired and I'm also so scared of them.
**tldr; I'm tired and don't wanna be awake for a very long time due to many issues. Probably academic and parental validation issues. Idk. If anyone has good therapy places for me to go to that would be greatly appreciated for future references.**
| 2 |
having no one to talk too
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hey this is kinda my first post like ever lol, but i've been having a hard time lately with having no one else to talk to about like my problems except my bf and it comes down to the point where me and my bf are having some trouble together and he starts to get drained and needs space which is obviously fine, but it comes down to where he needs his space and now i have no one to talk to about how i'm feeling or what's on my mind cuz ik i need to give him space and im fine with that and i don't want my problems to pile up on him especially since he's drained and needs space, and i don't have a therapist bc my mom doesn't like the "field" of it ig idk, and i don't have any close friends that i can talk to my problems about and i don't know what to do because i need to talk to someone about these things im overthinking about and how im feeling, but i can't bc my bf is the only person i really talk too, which is bc i left all of my toxic friends, and the friends i have now aren't very close w me, and my parents aren't helpful with anything i have trouble w. i just need someone else to talk to that isn't my bf, and im making efforts to befriend new people but non of them are close which sucks,and im trying so hard to be friends with these people but i always have a hard time with making new friends, that's really all it is, im sorry for all of the spelling errors but yeah idk
| 5 |
I like my psychiatrist but hate the network - lifestance health
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It seems like for two steps I make gain in managing my depression or anxiety , I take one step back due to incompetent billing and customer service.
Here are the issues
1. The fact that if you don’t cancel in advance at minimum 48h, they charge you $175.
2. Their billing a mess, they used to charge after every visit but my experience was they didn’t bill me, just my insurance.
I was under impression I was covered until they did one lump some billing for previous visit in amount of $1400 for past 5 months, 1-2 a month video visit
3. Since I seizures job and I am in waiting period I don’t have insurance this month but still needed to see my psychiatrist to renew my prescription.
I asked insurance to update my address and change insurance info to self pay hoping to get self pay rate and they haven’t followed or their system is not updating correctly. But they did remember to bill me all shit at once and get radio silence when I simply ask about payment plan.
| 3 |
Let's Talk - Men being vulnerable
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[https://www.youtube.com/@letstalkprod](https://www.youtube.com/@letstalkprod)
## Let's Talk, a mental health project allowing men to talk about their feelings
A mental health project and concept of men talking about their feelings, and being vulnerable is one YouNeek Productions and Emotionally Connected are exploring through Let's Talk.
### What is Let's Talk?
Let's Talk is a safe environment where a group of men of similar ages meet a clinical therapist to discuss and support each other with their own mental health issues. All the participants have volunteered to join the group discussions. Each of them have their own stories and experiences that they are looking to understand, accept and grow from.
These men do not know each other personally, but they all share the desire of wanting to improve their own mental health by being able to be open about their feelings and in doing so help each other in the process.
| 1 |
Peeling off the skin on the fingertips
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Hi, this is my first post on this subreddit. I cannot stop peeling the skin on my fingers for more than 15 years (I am 21) even though I want to stop. I use my fingers and nails to do that, but sometimes needles or pens. Sometimes I bite them, too. I continue even after it bleeds. I used to pick my nails, not the skins when I was little, but after wearing gel nail polish, I stopped doing that and instead, the habit shifted to the skin around.
I did not think it was a big deal because my parents never cared, either, but I was recently reading a research paper about mental illness social research and found out that self-harm is also a sign of mental illness. Many websites say it is due to stress, but I am not sure if mine is really caused by stress. Does anyone have the same experience and went to a therapist or a psychiatrist? I am curious about what they would say and your experience there.
| 1 |
therapy not working
|
I'm 30 now. All my old friends are in serious relationships and my now ex girlfriend just tried to get a restraining order after I freaked out knowing she was fucking another guy. I get a lot of shit from people who just hate me because i am financially doing well but i am lonely and miserable only getting release from watching porn and cutting myself. I have been depressed since childhood and gave therapy a try and no matter who it is there's just this huge disconnect. They try to put these labels on me but my feelings are not static and i don't feel like they can relate. I was with my bestfriend when he died two years ago, i saw him crash off a bridge and found his body. He accidentally killed someone playing soccer and it ate away at him and i feel like this is eating away at me too. I don't feel like i fit in with the misfit crowd or the prepsters and am just always alone. how do i get out of this hole?
| 4 |
In spite of the fact that he is in rehab, I feel guilt quite often over the fact that my brother was struggling mental health wise growing up and I didn’t see it.
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I hate that my father and I (and well really the whole family) were ever emotionally abusive toward him. I just miss my brother, my real brother - the brother I had before the drugs. The truth is that the fact that he’s in rehab has been on my mind for a while now.
| 2 |
Death constantly on my mind
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Not only suicide, but death of others, too. My loved ones dying. Strangers dying. Tragedy.
I've had 4 life changing traumas happen in my life, and I only just realized it this last year. I notice I have ups and downs. I am currently in a down and I'm fixated on death. I have the feeling of crying in my throat, right this second. But I can't let it out. There is no relief from it.
My body hurts, there is chronic pain. And I'm trapped in it, as well as in my mind. I feel like I'm slowly drowning.
I don't know when this fog will end but I hope it stops soon.
| 15 |
How do i stop obsessing over stupid things?
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I know it aint a big deal but with my anxiety i keep worrying about shit. How do i stop worrying about stupid shi
| 1 |
i dont know how i feel
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i feel like everyone is just there, and im not fitted in this world and everytime i come home it just repeats waking up doing the same thing and even if i open up to my personal close ones, nothing changes i feel so lost im in 10 yr of hs, my friends acting different and i cant even let my feelings out with them, im tired i dont know what else to pursue or to make new friends, it feels like everytime i have to talk with them its not something real i put on i cant explain i dont know 🥲
| 3 |
How do you stop the “should haves”
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I have regrets/ mistakes I’ve made and fixate on them. It gives me anxiety. I try to reframe it by focusing on the lesson I learned from the mistake but it’s not working. How do I stop beating myself up for being stupid? Thank you
| 2 |
How to help someone with schizophrenia who doesn’t want help?
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My brother, who is 29 years old, was diagnosed with schizophrenia during college after experiencing a meltdown where he began to believe that people were staring at him and talking about him. With therapy and monthly injections, he was able to manage his symptoms and return to a state of normalcy. However, he abruptly stopped his treatment one day, insisting that he no longer needed it.
Currently, he lives with our parents and has lost his job. He paces back and forth in the house, speaks to himself while mumbling religious things, and is convinced that my family is constantly talking about him. His condition has even caused him to lash out at us during past events, such as calling my girlfriend, mother, and me rude names during Christmas.
Despite our concerns, whenever we suggest that he goes back to therapy or restart his medication, he becomes extremely defensive and tries to turn the situation around on us. He claims that he is the normal one and that we are the ones who need therapy. As his family, we want to know how we can help him even though he is resistant to seeking treatment.
| 1 |
The world is hopeless. Pain is inevitable. But I still want to live. Anyone else ever feel that way?
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Im just looking for people who are honest with their feelings.
| 7 |
I feel like the hospital will only help me if I stab myself
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Not in a fatal area. But I went there recently when I said I wanted to jump in the subway and they sent me home the next day. Every time I go there but I haven't done anything violent towards myself they always send me home. I am in an insurmountable amount of pain and I don't know how to make it go away.
| 5 |
I don’t feel right anymore
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To be completely honest, I have fought with depression and anxiety for over 10 years now. I feel like I had it under control until fairly recently. I don’t feel like myself anymore. I have lost so many people lately and I question why. But sometimes I just think about how much those people who left me hurt me more than words can even describe yet I’m the bad guy. I have been through so much over the past few years and I am just now opening up to a stranger but I can’t even open up to my friends anymore because I feel like if I do I will cry and never stop. The truth is that I’m not a great person but it’s not like I hurt others intentionally. I always feel like I’m the bad guy even though I’m told I’m not. I have a few friends left now and a boyfriend who supports me and shows me love everyday but I’m so scared to let him see how I truly feel nowadays. My meds can only numb so much until I break down. I’m starting to question why I’m still here trying. I don’t want to get out of bed anymore I don’t want to talk to anyone anymore, and I just want to lock myself in a room with nothing but my thoughts because that’s how I feel nowadays. I feel like I’m this bad person who shouldn’t be allowed to be near anyone because of my past affecting everything even if I try not to let it. I feel like everyone hates me and just wants me gone. What do I even do anymore.
| 2 |
Noticing that I have panic attacks, everyday…I don’t know why, and it’s getting harder to manage.
| null | 1 |
Serial Worrywart and Overthinker
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So I’m in a tough spot with life. It has been kicking my since mid January and it’s severely affecting me mentally. At work the stress isn’t much different than it all has always been but that little stuff is becoming icing on the cake so to speak. So today I completely crumbled at work and it was bad. All the things I’ve been feeling and holding in exploded. But I was told it was inappropriate and unprofessional to have a meltdown at work. While I think I am ok at least until the next breakdown, I feel like they thought it was a *tantrum*. I am curious what you alls take on that response is.
***I had a bout of uncontrollable crying and breathing. It was a panic attack. It happened in my office behind a closed door.***
| 2 |
Tips on finding identity within yourself
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I'm upset and confused.
I've revolved my entire life and identity around people who didn't care about me as much as I did.
Not that every relationship/friendship wasn't mutual beforehand, but that I used people in my life as a crutch to form my personality so to speak and—
Well things didn't turn out and now I'm kinda left in the dark about how to go about my life?
How do people find themselves during this, especially when it feels like you don't have anyone to turn to?
Agh, It'd probably be best to be able to figure this out on my own, but does anyone have tips or something about their experiences with self discovery or something
I just genuinely feel like I don't know who I am without these people and now I feel like I don't have anything.
It's like I tied my self worth to the relationships I have, and it still feels that way with the few people I'm still in contact with.
I want to be able to separate that sense of self worth from others.
| 1 |
what is going on with me
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For the last two days, I keep feeling like I'm having flashbacks of a dream and it feels significant like it's something I've forgotten but important to remember. As soon as I get a little bit of memory about it my thoughts get loud and it's gone. it's like my brain is protecting me from it.
For context, I'm on spravato treatment. The last treatment was on March 7th. I am stressed but not any more than usual and I have forgotten to get my Lamictal for at least two weeks (I'm picking it up today I already feel bad enough about it)
| 3 |
Why do I lose concentration and am more likely to fail when someone I know is around?
|
Why do I lose Concentration and I'm more like to fail when someone I Know is around?
For example, I'm good at enduro cycling but when I have my friends accompany me I lose Concentration and I'm not able to replicate what I did cool the last 2 days and I fail a lot
Can anyone explain this to me?
| 1 |
Anyone else not able to feel/process emotions?
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I can't really feel emotions anymore..other than anxiety 🙄
Like I'll act happy around friends and family but I don't really feel it...I feel like I'm acting, reflecting how their acting versus actually feeling it myself...I feel like I don't even know what being truly happy actually feels like.
I feel like for so long I've dealt with overpowering emotions by shoving them down that I've gotten really good at it..like something sad happens or I start to freak out and I can almost immediately just go numb...but it's affecting positive emotions too..
And then when I can't numb like being scared or sad it send me into a panic attack..
I feel like it's just me and I also don't even know what this is, if it's some kind of mood disorder or I just messed myself up.
| 1 |
I totally lost myself during the pandemic. I became so afraid of everyone and everything. I’m slowly re-emerging and am scared I’ll never find that person who could feel so much joy again. Does anyone else ever feel that way?
| null | 4 |
I’m so self-aware of everything
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Everytime i have any kind of mental problem in my head or am having an episode, I’m always so aware about it and i hate it. I can’t cry and i want to so badly, I feel it in me but it never happens, why?? I am always trying to stop myself from snapping and nd having episodes, but at the same time i do that, i think about everything I want to say in my head and don’t say it. My head hurts.
| 1 |
I cant let go..
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Ok so, I love my girlfriend to pieces. It would break me to let go of her. I hate to say it but i am entirely screwed. I don't know how but she has made me unable to function without her. However, i feel she is losing feelings, she is not giving me as much attention, never talks to me etc, and whenever i bring it up, she always says no. However it is proven that men know women are losing feelings long before the women figure it out themself. The main problem is she gives other men more attention than she gives me. This causes me to overthink everything, worry. As much as i hate it i cry myself to sleep every night. I'm a mess. Before i met her i was fine which leads me to believe it's because I'm too reliant on her. I wanna kill myself daily. It's the easiest way to solve the problems. I already stress enough anyway. So idk what to do. Do i carry it on with her and let my mental health get worse and worse, or do i break things off and then have myself turn into a lazy bum who can't function properly. I really need help.
| 2 |
been battling depression for 10 years now
|
I can’t live like this anymore. All I want to do is be dead but nothing peacefully seems to work so I may have to do what’s necessary
| 11 |
Has anyone tried TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) for mental health?
|
Hey everyone,
I've been considering trying TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) as a treatment option. I've done some research on it, but I'd love to hear from people who have actually tried it.
Have any of you tried TMS for anxiety? If so, what was your experience like? Did you notice any improvement in your symptoms? Were there any side effects other than headaches?
I'd also be interested in hearing about the cost of getting TMS treatments. (I've seen from $3800-10K)
Thanks in advance for any insights you can share!
| 2 |
Psychiatrist is leaving practice
|
Had an emergency appointment with my psychiatrist today because stuff… she told me at the end of our session that she is leaving for a new post at the end of May. I am freaking out. I have been working with her for several years now. She is the only doctor who truly listens to me. Who truly has my best interests in mind. Who not only recognises my trauma, but let’s me know how that is impacting. It took me a long time to trust her bc she is almost identical in looking like my psychotic SIL. But I’ve been able to tell her things I’ve never told anyone about before but have held onto for 40+ years. I am freaking out. I have one last appt coming up before she leaves. I’m truly terrified about what happens next. She has been the best psychiatrist I’ve ever worked with. Feeling very sad.
| 1 |
Anyone Else HATE Mother's Day?
|
I wish for Mother's Day loved ones would ask each mom what they would like to do for their day.
This is how brunch goes:
Get wild kids bathed and wrestled into nice clothes.
Realize that you too are expected to look dressed up.
Those two things alone are exhausting!!!
Then you go to a crowded restaurant, go through the brunch line to get plates for kids. You only have two hands so you will go back through for your plate. By that time the kids are done and the other adults are almost done too.
Now you have to try and scarf your food down in bites that you grab while making sure your kids aren't tearing the restaurant up.
THIS IS THE LAST THING I WANT TO DO ON A DAY FOR MOTHERS. This leads to burnout and a mental breakdown almost every year for me.
Peace, quiet and sleep is what a lot of us moms really want on our day. We can love and appreciate our moms and kids any day of the year.
If it truly is a day for moms, ask them what they want.
| 1 |
not capable of relaxing?
|
Hi you all, my problem is i would like to pursue more creative hobbies like drawing but 90% of the times i feel i can't because i am too stressed for something (i am in uni now, so it is alternating between lessons and exams). That something being too mentally tired for doing anything else rather the watching the phone or the tv, or being too mentally tired because of studying. I am sure someone else has encountered this problem. How you solve this?
| 1 |
How to deal with intrusive thoughts as a coping mechanism
|
Is that a thing and does it also happen to anybody else? I haven't found any info from the internet.
Usually when im in pain sometimes thoughts of violance and hurting people you love and getting weird comfort from them. I've had intrusive thoughts to say these things out loud. Now its more often than ever. And i have actually exicuted sayng on these. I need help i think. The crisis happend after my first visit to psycologist. And i think something is triggered but im not sure what.
| 1 |
How do i get over this?
|
For as long as i can remember my father has both verbally and physically abused me, he doesn't live with me and my Mum but when i went for visits with him i couldn't even shower or bathe, due to him growing weed in the tub. i hate him but i want to have a relationship with him, which pisses of my mum and i get that, but we aren't talking anymore because i recently found out that since my sister was 14, he was selling her drugs and being a parent figure towards her, and it hurts me. i dont get why only my little sister(same dad different mum) and my older sister (same mum different dad) get to have a good parent figure, meanwhile i cry myself to sleep thinking of what he has done to me for my whole life, i don't know how to get over this, any advice?
| 1 |
I just want to be heard.
|
*TW* Self Harm, Abuse
This might be a long post but please bear with me.
For as long as I can remember I've had behavioral issues. My moods swing from extreme highs to extreme lows, when I'm angry I get irrational, I can only cry if I'm absolutely heartbroken and at one of the lowest points of my life-often times my anger and sadness coincide and I berate myself for being weak, sometimes hitting myself. When I'm happy I feel like nothing could go wrong no matter what, I convince myself that the bad days didn't even exist. Most of this nobody would know because I internalize it and hide my instability from everyone because I've always been afraid it will drive people away. I would say that most of the time I'm just empty. I cant smile or laugh, I can't get angry or sad. I'm just walking through this thick fog that takes away any and all personality.
I'm impulsive, I will go months without spending money on anything, save up a couple thousand, and then one random day will come along and I'll spend it all within a week. I've had trouble with credit card debt in the past because of this. I also uproot my life randomly, changing my college major, career plans, quitting and getting new jobs. I joined the military because I convinced myself that if I had no free will, I couldn't make the bad decisions I normally do but I feel like it's only made things worse.
I've had substance abuse issues, anything that makes my brain work differently I get hooked on. It got really bad before I joined the military and honestly if I didn't join when I did I likely would have killed myself from the lifestyle I was living.
Now for the relationships. With friends, family, partners-it doesn't matter who, I am either completely obsessed with them and never want to leave their side, or I don't care about them at all. I will fully convince myself that someone doesn't love me just because they worded something weird over text and when I finally do see them in person and I see the love in their eyes and notice the little things they do that scream "I love you": because I've already planted that seed in my head that it's not true I'll convince myself further that they're only doing it for show and they are trying to manipulate me. It doesn't help that I've been in very toxic and abusive relationships in the past. One of my partners tried to kill me, locked me outside our apartment in the snow for hours with no jacket or phone, jumped out of the car while I was driving, etc. And that's only one relationship, the others have been pretty much the same. I always chalked it up to my childhood causing me to have a skewed relationship with love and abuse but I feel like I've come to terms with my past yet I still get in these explosive relationships because then I know I have a reason to be crazy instead of it just being because of my brain.
I know that this behavior isn't normal, and I have my own assumptions of what is going on in my head but that's not my reason for making this post. Anyone I've tried to explain this to just tells me that everyone feels that way, that I'm just going through a rough spot and as soon as I get back to having a normal life I'll be okay. Any therapist I've spoken to has always told me that I seem fine because I am able to take a situation, pick it apart, justify why I did it and how I can fix it/how to cope with it (even though I almost never follow through with the solution). My therapists always tend to focus on helping me through solutions instead of finding the root of my problems which is what I really need.
I just feel so alone. Everyone brushes me aside when I try to talk about my struggles and they water it down by saying it's not that serious. But to me it IS that serious. It's a daily struggle that I go through. One day I'll have my entire life planned out in front of me and know exactly who I am. The next I look in a mirror and don't even recognize my own face. I want to get actual help but I'm afraid that anyone I go to will brush me aside all the same.
| 2 |
*sigh* I just really hate me.
|
[POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNING] SH, body dysmorphia, ED.
Female 23. I go by Hannah on here 💕 she/her
‐----‐----------------------
I've been having alot of problems lately with my partner of 5 years, it's just getting tough and im becoming really hard on myself.
Hes made me hate me...
It was so good and now im so confused.
He came out as trans (MtF) during an argument regarding him actually cheating on me and posting explicit photos online without my permission. (I knew AFTER the Australian police got involved... r.i.p)
That was 3 years in.. we had cheating problems before but im always wanting to try again (I've not done anything...)
Fast foward to now..
Hes never commented on my posts or interacts with my stuff.. he got mad about me commenting on my own post with his account as it was "the wrong one"
I have snooped and found hes very into the taboo of trans woman, chicks with dicks, femboys....etc etc all of which are really skinny and fem which I'm the complete opposite of. We haven't had sex in months... its rare..
Which after him cheating on me with someone of that community I just
Fuck man
I've always not liked myself... but now I'm sitting here in tears... I hate every inch of me and I've never wished before that i was a man until now..
Maybe if I had a penis he'd like me.. or even want to have sex with me...
My head is just filled with i wish I was skinny, I wish I was pretty, I wish i wasn't me..
I've struggled alot with self harm as well as alot of mental disorders. So im not the prettiest thing out there mean I call myself a fat little German boy... (nothing against Germans btw)
I just want to feel pretty... or wanted, or supported, im sick of doing it all alone. It's getting too hard and I keep holding on but fml. I want to be dead.
| 2 |
why do I want to be in a bad spot
|
Everytime everything starts to go right and everything is good in my life it starts to feel wrong and I feel like something bad has to be happening that causes me pain. I almost feel like I have to put myself in shitty situations and do thing to make me life harder so I can struggle somehow.
I'm not sure why I have the complex any, does anyone have a suggestion.
| 1 |
has anyone ever tapered off fetzima?
|
i’m currently on fetzima 80mg and have been for several months. my doctor and i have a bad relationship and i feel very judged by him and not at all comfortable talking to him about anything. i would like to stop taking my meds soonish, and know i need to taper, but not sure what kind of schedule he might put me on. basically i want to know whether it might take one month or two or more?
has anyone ever had a doctors guidance with tapering off fetzima? how often did you reduce, and how long before you were off it completely? thank you!!
| 2 |
Focalin, Cymbalta??
|
Has anyone tried Focalin? My doctor just switched me from Adderall IR 20mg to Focalin 10mg. I’ve tried nearly every stimulant with basically no luck. The Adderall IR was the only one that has kindve worked but even that was only like 1-2 days of the week. So we’re trying Focalin.. I’ve never heard of it, but I read it’s a diff main ingredient. If you tried Focalin, what was your experience like? What were you on prior? I took it today for the first time and didn’t notice anything, so I took the second dose later and felt major jitters so much that it’s all I could concentrate on.. I wish I was able to cut the tabs. He also took me off Wellbutrin (which is for depression but he said helps with ADHD) bc I don’t think it’s doing anything anymore and starting to think maybe depression is playing a bigger part in my focus/motivation/ADHD symptoms (IDK!) I don’t feel depressed. But maybe that’s my “normal” and I don’t recognize it. so he switched Wellbutrin to Cymbalta. He says Cymbalta can also help ADHD as well as depression. I know this Sub is for ADHD but has anyone tried Cymbalta either? Maybe combined with Focalin or a stimulant?
| 1 |
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