jamesliu23/simpsons · Datasets at Hugging Face

text stringlengths 7 697
I can't help but feel that if we had gotten to know each other better, my leaving would actually have meant something.
Well, we have one quick stop and then it's on to Capital City.
I can't believe it. Our baby sister in the big city.
I'll call you every day.
I'll call you, too.
Look, he can use a horn.
Oh, shut up.
... Some may say that I have been given a bad break in life -- little education, bald as a cue ball, ten years on the same job for the same salary -- but today, as I leave for Capital City, I consider myself the luckiest mascot on the face of the Earth!
With the fickle fans already forgetting me, I was ready to take the biggest step of my life.
Well kids, there it is, Capital City.
Look! The Crosstown Bridge!
THERE'S A SWINGIN' TOWN I KNOW /,theres a swingin town i know,6
5346,18,200,Tony Bennett: CALLED CAPITAL CITY...
The Pennyloafer!
PEOPLE STOP AND SCREAM HELLO /,people stop and scream hello,5
5349,18,203,Tony Bennett: IN CAPITAL CITY...
Kids, look! Street crime!
IT'S THE KIND OF PLACE THAT MAKES,its the kind of place that makes,7
5352,18,206,Tony Bennett: A BUM / FEEL LIKE A KING...
Wow! That's service!
AND IT MAKES A KING FEEL LIKE/,and it makes a king feel like,7
5355,18,209,Tony Bennett: SOME NUTTY KOO-KOO SUPER-KING...
Look, it's Tony Bennett!
Hey, good to see you.
"IT'S AGAINST THE LAW TO FROWN /,its against the law to frown,6
5443,19,16,"Marge Simpson: Oh
IN CAPITAL CITY. "YOU'LL CAPER LIKE A STUPID CLOWN / WHEN YOU CHANCE TO SEE..."
Fourth Street and D!
...FOURTH STREET AND D!/ YEAH!/ ONCE YOU GET A WHIFF OF IT...YOU'LL NEVER WANT TO ROAM.
The Duff Brewery!
FROM CAPITAL CITY, MY HOME SWEET HOME / CAPITAL CITY... THAT HAPPYTOWN CITY / IT'S CAPITAL CITY, MY HOME, SWEET, SWINGIN' HOME"
Capital City -- yeah!
Awww. Come to bed, Homie.
Sorry, honey. I'm just a little nervous.
We would talk about it always. For the first time in our lives, Marge fell asleep before I did.
Okay, here are your tickets. They're supposed to be good. You're sitting with the player's wives. And don't forget to cheer for me.
See you after the game, when you're a big star.
Bart was strangely quiet. Later he explained he was confused by feelings of respect for me. That wouldn't last.
Omigod! I don't believe it. It's really you, the Capital City "Goofball."
Hello, Dancin' Homer. Glad to have you aboard. If there's anything I can do for you just squeeze the wheeze.
The fifth inning will be yours. Everyone is settled in, they've had a coupla beers; the game is official. It's a pretty important inning.
Wow, the fifth.
It's also the inning I wish I had a zipper on the front of this thing, if you know what I mean.
Right, Mr. Goofball.
Hey, call me plain ol' "Goof". So what exactly do you have planned for us?
Well, I get up, I dance, I spell out the name of the city... all to the tune of Baby Elephant Walk.
Aah, Mancini. The mascot's best friend. Well, see you on that field. I'll set 'em up, you knock 'em down.
Well, hello, everybody. Dave Glass talkin' at ya. We've got great weather here tonight under the Dome.
Let's see. Upper, upper, upper mezzanine. Hmmm. Yes, these must be ours.
These seats stink!
You'd think the player's wives would be a little closer to the action.
Actually, this section is for the player's ex-wives.
And then I found out that all the while there was this bimbo in Kansas City.
Throw at his head!
Who'd've thought it? A free ticket to a big league park but I was too tense to enjoy the game. Every ounce of concentration I possessed was focused on the task at hand.
Red hots! Get your read hots here!
Oooh, red hots.
Ladies and gentlemen. Capital City's newest sensation, Dancin' Homer!
Mmm, these do taste better at the ballpark. Uh oh.
There he is!
I was graceful. I was witty. Brother, I was somethin'.
But they didn't care.
What's with these people? Why are they sitting on their hands?
Mom, what's he doing wrong?
I don't know.
It was so quiet you could hear each individual smart-ass remark.
This guy doesn't make me want to cheer.
Gee, I really pity him. Making a fool of himself in front of so many people.
These cornball antics may play in the sticks, but this is Capital City!
The only applause I got was for dragging my carcass out of there.
Hey, Mr. Showmanship! The owner wants to see you in his office right now.
I'm sorry, young man; you're just not ready. Pick up your check at the front office... and for God's sake, put some clothes on!
Well, I guess it's back to good old Springfield.
Would you like some fruit juice?
But I can't go back! Not after I've seen the bright lights of Capital City. I'll wither and die like a hothouse flower.
Now stop it you two. And don't look too down. I'm sure this is hard enough for your father.
What a family.
My wife and kids stood by me. On the way home I realized how little that helped.
So that's it. The costume's buried now. As my son would say, I'm one sad ape-like dude.
What a saga.
Hey, you guys are hanging on my every word. I've become the center of attention.
Yeah, it's riveting.
Tell it again, Homer.
Okay. I wonder why stories of degradation and humiliation make you more popular.
I don't know. They just do.
Bust my hump all week... stupid grass... supposed to be the boy's job.
Now, now, Homer. Bart's busy working on his science project.
You heard the lady, Homer. So please mow quietly. Genius at work.
"One o'clock -- still just a potato.,one oclock -- still just a potato,7
5433,19,6,"Ned Flanders: (PLEASANTLY) Hey there
H'lo, Flanders.
Doing a little yard work, huh?
Who told? Marge! Beer me!
Say Simpson, I-I've got some time-release granules that'll get rid of that crabgrass in just a half-a-jif.
Crabgrass? What are you talking about? Where?
Well, ooh, there... there... and uh there's a big patch over there.
There's nothing wrong with crabgrass! It just has a bad name, that's all. Everyone would love it if it had a cute name like... uh... elfgrass.
Well, you may be right!
Marge! Where's the Duff?
Don't toy with me, woman.

I can't help but feel that if we had gotten to know each other better, my leaving would actually have meant something.

Well, we have one quick stop and then it's on to Capital City.

I can't believe it. Our baby sister in the big city.

I'll call you every day.

I'll call you, too.

Look, he can use a horn.

Oh, shut up.

... Some may say that I have been given a bad break in life -- little education, bald as a cue ball, ten years on the same job for the same salary -- but today, as I leave for Capital City, I consider myself the luckiest mascot on the face of the Earth!

With the fickle fans already forgetting me, I was ready to take the biggest step of my life.

Well kids, there it is, Capital City.

Look! The Crosstown Bridge!

THERE'S A SWINGIN' TOWN I KNOW /,theres a swingin town i know,6

5346,18,200,Tony Bennett: CALLED CAPITAL CITY...

The Pennyloafer!

PEOPLE STOP AND SCREAM HELLO /,people stop and scream hello,5

5349,18,203,Tony Bennett: IN CAPITAL CITY...

Kids, look! Street crime!

IT'S THE KIND OF PLACE THAT MAKES,its the kind of place that makes,7

5352,18,206,Tony Bennett: A BUM / FEEL LIKE A KING...

Wow! That's service!

AND IT MAKES A KING FEEL LIKE/,and it makes a king feel like,7

5355,18,209,Tony Bennett: SOME NUTTY KOO-KOO SUPER-KING...

Look, it's Tony Bennett!

Hey, good to see you.

"IT'S AGAINST THE LAW TO FROWN /,its against the law to frown,6

5443,19,16,"Marge Simpson: Oh

IN CAPITAL CITY. "YOU'LL CAPER LIKE A STUPID CLOWN / WHEN YOU CHANCE TO SEE..."

Fourth Street and D!

...FOURTH STREET AND D!/ YEAH!/ ONCE YOU GET A WHIFF OF IT...YOU'LL NEVER WANT TO ROAM.

The Duff Brewery!

FROM CAPITAL CITY, MY HOME SWEET HOME / CAPITAL CITY... THAT HAPPYTOWN CITY / IT'S CAPITAL CITY, MY HOME, SWEET, SWINGIN' HOME"

Capital City -- yeah!

Awww. Come to bed, Homie.

Sorry, honey. I'm just a little nervous.

We would talk about it always. For the first time in our lives, Marge fell asleep before I did.

Okay, here are your tickets. They're supposed to be good. You're sitting with the player's wives. And don't forget to cheer for me.

See you after the game, when you're a big star.

Bart was strangely quiet. Later he explained he was confused by feelings of respect for me. That wouldn't last.

Omigod! I don't believe it. It's really you, the Capital City "Goofball."

Hello, Dancin' Homer. Glad to have you aboard. If there's anything I can do for you just squeeze the wheeze.

The fifth inning will be yours. Everyone is settled in, they've had a coupla beers; the game is official. It's a pretty important inning.

Wow, the fifth.

It's also the inning I wish I had a zipper on the front of this thing, if you know what I mean.

Right, Mr. Goofball.

Hey, call me plain ol' "Goof". So what exactly do you have planned for us?

Well, I get up, I dance, I spell out the name of the city... all to the tune of Baby Elephant Walk.

Aah, Mancini. The mascot's best friend. Well, see you on that field. I'll set 'em up, you knock 'em down.

Well, hello, everybody. Dave Glass talkin' at ya. We've got great weather here tonight under the Dome.

Let's see. Upper, upper, upper mezzanine. Hmmm. Yes, these must be ours.

These seats stink!

You'd think the player's wives would be a little closer to the action.

Actually, this section is for the player's ex-wives.

And then I found out that all the while there was this bimbo in Kansas City.

Throw at his head!

Who'd've thought it? A free ticket to a big league park but I was too tense to enjoy the game. Every ounce of concentration I possessed was focused on the task at hand.

Red hots! Get your read hots here!

Oooh, red hots.

Ladies and gentlemen. Capital City's newest sensation, Dancin' Homer!

Mmm, these do taste better at the ballpark. Uh oh.

There he is!

I was graceful. I was witty. Brother, I was somethin'.

But they didn't care.

What's with these people? Why are they sitting on their hands?

Mom, what's he doing wrong?

I don't know.

It was so quiet you could hear each individual smart-ass remark.

This guy doesn't make me want to cheer.

Gee, I really pity him. Making a fool of himself in front of so many people.

These cornball antics may play in the sticks, but this is Capital City!

The only applause I got was for dragging my carcass out of there.

Hey, Mr. Showmanship! The owner wants to see you in his office right now.

I'm sorry, young man; you're just not ready. Pick up your check at the front office... and for God's sake, put some clothes on!

Well, I guess it's back to good old Springfield.

Would you like some fruit juice?

But I can't go back! Not after I've seen the bright lights of Capital City. I'll wither and die like a hothouse flower.

Now stop it you two. And don't look too down. I'm sure this is hard enough for your father.

What a family.

My wife and kids stood by me. On the way home I realized how little that helped.

So that's it. The costume's buried now. As my son would say, I'm one sad ape-like dude.

What a saga.

Hey, you guys are hanging on my every word. I've become the center of attention.

Yeah, it's riveting.

Tell it again, Homer.

Okay. I wonder why stories of degradation and humiliation make you more popular.

I don't know. They just do.

Bust my hump all week... stupid grass... supposed to be the boy's job.

Now, now, Homer. Bart's busy working on his science project.

You heard the lady, Homer. So please mow quietly. Genius at work.

"One o'clock -- still just a potato.,one oclock -- still just a potato,7

5433,19,6,"Ned Flanders: (PLEASANTLY) Hey there

H'lo, Flanders.

Doing a little yard work, huh?

Who told? Marge! Beer me!

Say Simpson, I-I've got some time-release granules that'll get rid of that crabgrass in just a half-a-jif.

Crabgrass? What are you talking about? Where?

Well, ooh, there... there... and uh there's a big patch over there.

There's nothing wrong with crabgrass! It just has a bad name, that's all. Everyone would love it if it had a cute name like... uh... elfgrass.

Well, you may be right!

Marge! Where's the Duff?

Don't toy with me, woman.