jamesliu23/simpsons · Datasets at Hugging Face

text stringlengths 7 697
Come on, boy, sit! Sit! Sit! Sit! Oh, man!
Bart, he's not gonna learn it now. Don't spend your last hours together tormenting the poor creature. Have some fun, frolic with him. Go get it, boy!
I'm gonna miss you, boy.
I thought we were gonna be pals forever. But, we're gonna have to say goodbye, because you don't understand a single word I say. If you just knew how important it was to learn sit...
Wait a minute! You did it!
... lay down...
... shake hands?... stay!
... speak!
All right! Good boy! Roll over!
You son-of-a-bitch. Good show!
Dad, the next time we see you we'll do something more fun.
COME TO PAPA, COME TO PAPA, DO...
Oh, what could be more fun than today's trip to the liquor store. Thanks for the beef jerky.
Say goodbye to Grampa, everyone.
Goodb--
You know, Grampa kinda smells like that trunk in the garage where the bottom's all wet.
Huh uh, he smells more like a photo lab.
Stop it, both of you. Grampa smells like a regular old man, which is more like a hallway in a hospital.
Homer, that's terrible. We should be teaching the children to treasure the elderly. You know, we'll be old someday.
My God, you're right, Marge. You kids wouldn't put me in a home like I did to my dad, would you?
Well...
Marge, what do we do?
Well, I think we better set an example.
Absolutely. Our third Sunday of every month should be a pleasure, not a chore. Where's some place fun we can take Grampa next time?
To the pony rides.
Bo-ring.
He can't ride ponies.
Well, I always enjoy the glass blower at Old Springfield Towne.
Oh, we saw that.
The Museum of Barnyard Oddities.
No, Bart. No!
That's gross.
I got it. The Springfield Mystery Spot.
Dad, it's just a dumb mud puddle.
Discount Lion Safari!
Like I'm going to wreck 600 dollars worth of teeth on forty cents worth of old beef.
Hey, these aren't my pills.
Now, now, Mr. Simmons. Don't make me call Nurse Bronski.
It's Simpson, dammit, and these aren't my pills.
Excuse me, Nurse. My name is Simmons and I think I have the wrong pills.
I get two red ones for my back spasms, a yellow one for my arrythmia, and two of the blue... ... est eyes I've ever seen in my life.
Then, these must be...
And I have your...
They must have...
Look at us. We're starin' at each other like a couple of stupid punk teenagers.
I wasn't staring; it's my lazy eye. I'm Beatrice Simmons, but my friends call me Bea.
We'll I'm Abraham J. Simpson. Care to tip the wrist with me?
I would be delighted.
So, tell me about yourself.
Eh, widower, one son, one working kidney. And you?
Widowed, bad hip and liver disorder.
You left something out. Ravishing!
And, what are you eh, doing tonight?
Sitting alone in my room.
Oh. Well, if you've got plans already...
No, what were you going to say?
Ah, nothin'.
Oh, Abe, you were going to say something.
Well, I was wondering if you and I, you know, might go to the same place at the same time and ... Geez, you'd think this would get easier with time.
I'd love to.
Okay, now, where's that pomade?
Ah, damn, out of pomade. Oh, well.
Ooh, hello, young lady, is your grandmother home?
Oh, oh, oh, Abe. I can tell I better keep my good eye on you.
Damn straight.
EMBRACE ME, MY SWEET EMBRACEABLE YOU.
Embrace me, you irreplaceable you.
DON'T BE A NAUGHTY BABY...
MY SWEET EMBRACEABLE YOU.
MY SWEET EMBRACEABLE YOU.
Herman, a very special lady is having a birthday tomorrow.
Ah, the Battleship New Jersey.
No, you idiot. My girlfriend Bea. And since this is the only store I know --
Ah, Grampa, nothing says "I love you" better than a military antique.
Let's take a look at the bayonet case. Huh?
Hey, what's that?
That, my friend, was Napoleon's hat.
It doesn't look like Napoleon's hat.
Well, it's not the famous hat. It's the one he wore for a week in April, 1796, just before he defeated the Sardinians.
Ooh. How much?
Four hundred dollars.
I'll give you five bucks.
That's not the kind of offer you should make to a man with a Gattling gun under the counter. Why don't you try Grandma's World.
Yo, active wear... I need a price check on a wool shawl.
Dad! It's the third Sunday of the month. You know what that means.
Go away.
Oh, come on, Dad, I promise we'll have more fun this time. We're gonna see lions.
I can't go. It's my girlfriend Bea's birthday.
Oh, you have a girlfriend. Heh, heh, heh.
Well, Happy Birthday, Bea. She can come with us. Hey, there's room for all your friends in the car.
No, she's not invisible, you idiot. See, it's her birthday tonight.
Yeah, right.
Hey you kids, stop kicking the seat!
I'm kicking the seat!
Dad, don't you want to know where we're going?
Discount Lion Safari!
Damn these childproof doors.
That'll be eighteen fifty.
Do not feed animals. Do not allow animals in the car. Do not make eye contact with animals.
Are we in Africa yet?

Come on, boy, sit! Sit! Sit! Sit! Oh, man!

Bart, he's not gonna learn it now. Don't spend your last hours together tormenting the poor creature. Have some fun, frolic with him. Go get it, boy!

I'm gonna miss you, boy.

I thought we were gonna be pals forever. But, we're gonna have to say goodbye, because you don't understand a single word I say. If you just knew how important it was to learn sit...

Wait a minute! You did it!

... lay down...

... shake hands?... stay!

... speak!

All right! Good boy! Roll over!

You son-of-a-bitch. Good show!

Dad, the next time we see you we'll do something more fun.

COME TO PAPA, COME TO PAPA, DO...

Oh, what could be more fun than today's trip to the liquor store. Thanks for the beef jerky.

Say goodbye to Grampa, everyone.

Goodb--

You know, Grampa kinda smells like that trunk in the garage where the bottom's all wet.

Huh uh, he smells more like a photo lab.

Stop it, both of you. Grampa smells like a regular old man, which is more like a hallway in a hospital.

Homer, that's terrible. We should be teaching the children to treasure the elderly. You know, we'll be old someday.

My God, you're right, Marge. You kids wouldn't put me in a home like I did to my dad, would you?

Well...

Marge, what do we do?

Well, I think we better set an example.

Absolutely. Our third Sunday of every month should be a pleasure, not a chore. Where's some place fun we can take Grampa next time?

To the pony rides.

Bo-ring.

He can't ride ponies.

Well, I always enjoy the glass blower at Old Springfield Towne.

Oh, we saw that.

The Museum of Barnyard Oddities.

No, Bart. No!

That's gross.

I got it. The Springfield Mystery Spot.

Dad, it's just a dumb mud puddle.

Discount Lion Safari!

Like I'm going to wreck 600 dollars worth of teeth on forty cents worth of old beef.

Hey, these aren't my pills.

Now, now, Mr. Simmons. Don't make me call Nurse Bronski.

It's Simpson, dammit, and these aren't my pills.

Excuse me, Nurse. My name is Simmons and I think I have the wrong pills.

I get two red ones for my back spasms, a yellow one for my arrythmia, and two of the blue... ... est eyes I've ever seen in my life.

Then, these must be...

And I have your...

They must have...

Look at us. We're starin' at each other like a couple of stupid punk teenagers.

I wasn't staring; it's my lazy eye. I'm Beatrice Simmons, but my friends call me Bea.

We'll I'm Abraham J. Simpson. Care to tip the wrist with me?

I would be delighted.

So, tell me about yourself.

Eh, widower, one son, one working kidney. And you?

Widowed, bad hip and liver disorder.

You left something out. Ravishing!

And, what are you eh, doing tonight?

Sitting alone in my room.

Oh. Well, if you've got plans already...

No, what were you going to say?

Ah, nothin'.

Oh, Abe, you were going to say something.

Well, I was wondering if you and I, you know, might go to the same place at the same time and ... Geez, you'd think this would get easier with time.

I'd love to.

Okay, now, where's that pomade?

Ah, damn, out of pomade. Oh, well.

Ooh, hello, young lady, is your grandmother home?

Oh, oh, oh, Abe. I can tell I better keep my good eye on you.

Damn straight.

EMBRACE ME, MY SWEET EMBRACEABLE YOU.

Embrace me, you irreplaceable you.

DON'T BE A NAUGHTY BABY...

MY SWEET EMBRACEABLE YOU.

Herman, a very special lady is having a birthday tomorrow.

Ah, the Battleship New Jersey.

No, you idiot. My girlfriend Bea. And since this is the only store I know --

Ah, Grampa, nothing says "I love you" better than a military antique.

Let's take a look at the bayonet case. Huh?

Hey, what's that?

That, my friend, was Napoleon's hat.

It doesn't look like Napoleon's hat.

Well, it's not the famous hat. It's the one he wore for a week in April, 1796, just before he defeated the Sardinians.

Ooh. How much?

Four hundred dollars.

I'll give you five bucks.

That's not the kind of offer you should make to a man with a Gattling gun under the counter. Why don't you try Grandma's World.

Yo, active wear... I need a price check on a wool shawl.

Dad! It's the third Sunday of the month. You know what that means.

Go away.

Oh, come on, Dad, I promise we'll have more fun this time. We're gonna see lions.

I can't go. It's my girlfriend Bea's birthday.

Oh, you have a girlfriend. Heh, heh, heh.

Well, Happy Birthday, Bea. She can come with us. Hey, there's room for all your friends in the car.

No, she's not invisible, you idiot. See, it's her birthday tonight.

Yeah, right.

Hey you kids, stop kicking the seat!

I'm kicking the seat!

Dad, don't you want to know where we're going?

Discount Lion Safari!

Damn these childproof doors.

That'll be eighteen fifty.

Do not feed animals. Do not allow animals in the car. Do not make eye contact with animals.

Are we in Africa yet?