jamesliu23/simpsons · Datasets at Hugging Face

text stringlengths 7 697
We're home!
Get a good haul this year?
Heh heh heh...Jackpot!
I am very, very proud of you kids.
We would have gotten even more if Lisa could walk faster.
I didn't select this costume for mobility. I wore it to salute the noble native American of the Pacific Northwests...
Now children, you can have one piece of candy tonight and save the rest for...
If you eat too much you'll have nightmares.
Oh, yeah. Everybody in the family is gonna have a bad nightmare tonight.
Oh yeah, three bad nightmares.
I'd like to see that.
What a dump. Why would Princess Grace live in a place like this?
Dad, that's Monaco.
I can do that but I don't wanna.
Eeuhgh. What is this thing?
It is a monkey's paw, dating back to Allal ben Abdallah. It has the power to grant wishes to its owner.
Oh yeah? How much?
Look everybody! My purse exploded!
Sir, I must strongly advise you do not purchase this. Behind every wish lurks grave misfortune. I myself was once President of Algeria...
C'mom pal, I don't wanna hear your life story. Paw me!
Ugghh, Homer. Where did you get that ugly thing?
Why at that little shop, right over... there.
Oh no, wait, it was over there.
You'll be sorry.
Flight seven, Marakesh to Springfield now boarding.
Just a moment...
Don't shoot, Don't shoot. They're souvenirs.
You must pay a fine of two American dollars.
Let's wish for x-ray specs that really work.
No, Bart. Peace on Earth.
X-ray specs.
Peace on Earth.
X-ray specs.
Peace on Earth.
X-ray specs.
Peace on Earth.
X-ray spects.
Peace on Earth.
Forget it, you two. As the pants- wearer of this house, I get the first wish.
Homer, there's something I don't like about that severed hand.
Marge, don't flake out on me. That monkey's paw is gonna make our dreams come true.
Oh, no! Maggie made a wish!
Oh, my land!
Ooh, a luxury car. Good baby. Good Maggie.
Ooh, a new pacifier.
Okay, no more fooling around. Paw, this is Bart. I wish for the Simpsons to be rich and famous.
Now you're talkin'!
Yaaayyy!!
Woo hoo!
C'mon, everybody. We're going to the fanciest restaurant in town!
I'm terribly sorry. I have absolutely nothing until June.
Ah, the Simpsons! Right this way, please.
Homer, maybe fame and fortune aren't as bad as they say.
If I hear one more thing about the Simpsons, I swear I'm going to scream.
At first they were cute and funny, but now they're just annoying.
Eighteen bucks for this? What a rip-off!
Man, this thing's really gettin' outta hand.
Oh, is there anything they won't do?
Oh Homer, this is awful.
Come to think of it, the guy that sold me this thing did say the wishes would bring grave misfortune. I thought he was just being colorful.
I wish for world peace.
Lisa, that was very selfish of you.
Sorry about the Falklands, old boy.
Ah, forget it. We kind of knew they were yours.
Won't be needing these anymore.
C'MON PEOPLE, NOW / SMILE ON YOUR BROTHER / EVERYBODY GET TOGETHER / TRY TO LOVE ONE ANOTHER RIGHT NOW...
Foolish humans.
Oh yes, Kodos. Earth is now ripe for the plucking.
People of earth. We come to you in the spirit of hostility and menace.
Now, let's be reasonable. We can resolve our differences peacefully.
Your superior intellect is no match for our puny weapons.
Colonel! You've got to do something!
What do you want me to do? I'm a baker now.
I had a bad dream. Could I sleep in your bed?
They're konking us with a club. Wished we saved an A-bomb or two.
Move along humans.
This is all the Simpsons' fault.
Before I was just bored with their antics and their merchandise. Now I wish they were dead.
Jeez, now we're slaves. This paw sucks.
Ok, Ok. I'll make a wish that can't backfire. I wish for a turkey sandwich, on rye bread, with lettuce and mustard, And...AND! I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any other weird surprises. You got it?
Hey... Hmm. Not bad. Nice hot mustard... good bread... Turkey's a little dry. The turkey's a little dry?! Oh foul, accursed thing! What demon from the depths of hell created thee?!
Hey, fellow slave, is that one of those monkey paw dealies that lets you wish for things?
Yeah, but I gotta warn you that this thing is ee ... Yeah, that's what it is. Wanna try it? Heh, heh, heh.
Okely-dokely.
Ohh, would ya look at that?
Kneel before my slingshot, puny earthling.
Well, I guess my first wish is to get rid of those awful aliens.
Aarsh. He's got a board with a nail in it!
And save humanity will ya.
RUN, KODOS!
Well, Kang, it seems the Earthlings won.
Did they?... That board with the nail in it may have defeated us. But the humans won't stop there. They'll make bigger boards and bigger nails. Soon, they will make a board with a nail so big it will destroy them all.
Hey, Homer! This little thing-a-ma-jig really works great. Now that I've saved the earth, maybe I oughtta spruce up the ol' homestead.
I wish I had a Monkey's Paw.
Bart... Bart...
Huh?... S'matter?
I'll give you a candy necklace.
Climb aboard.
Thanks, Bart.
Less talk, more sleep.

We're home!

Get a good haul this year?

Heh heh heh...Jackpot!

I am very, very proud of you kids.

We would have gotten even more if Lisa could walk faster.

I didn't select this costume for mobility. I wore it to salute the noble native American of the Pacific Northwests...

Now children, you can have one piece of candy tonight and save the rest for...

If you eat too much you'll have nightmares.

Oh, yeah. Everybody in the family is gonna have a bad nightmare tonight.

Oh yeah, three bad nightmares.

I'd like to see that.

What a dump. Why would Princess Grace live in a place like this?

Dad, that's Monaco.

I can do that but I don't wanna.

Eeuhgh. What is this thing?

It is a monkey's paw, dating back to Allal ben Abdallah. It has the power to grant wishes to its owner.

Oh yeah? How much?

Look everybody! My purse exploded!

Sir, I must strongly advise you do not purchase this. Behind every wish lurks grave misfortune. I myself was once President of Algeria...

C'mom pal, I don't wanna hear your life story. Paw me!

Ugghh, Homer. Where did you get that ugly thing?

Why at that little shop, right over... there.

Oh no, wait, it was over there.

You'll be sorry.

Flight seven, Marakesh to Springfield now boarding.

Just a moment...

Don't shoot, Don't shoot. They're souvenirs.

You must pay a fine of two American dollars.

Let's wish for x-ray specs that really work.

No, Bart. Peace on Earth.

X-ray specs.

Peace on Earth.

X-ray specs.

Peace on Earth.

X-ray specs.

Peace on Earth.

X-ray spects.

Peace on Earth.

Forget it, you two. As the pants- wearer of this house, I get the first wish.

Homer, there's something I don't like about that severed hand.

Marge, don't flake out on me. That monkey's paw is gonna make our dreams come true.

Oh, no! Maggie made a wish!

Oh, my land!

Ooh, a luxury car. Good baby. Good Maggie.

Ooh, a new pacifier.

Okay, no more fooling around. Paw, this is Bart. I wish for the Simpsons to be rich and famous.

Now you're talkin'!

Yaaayyy!!

Woo hoo!

C'mon, everybody. We're going to the fanciest restaurant in town!

I'm terribly sorry. I have absolutely nothing until June.

Ah, the Simpsons! Right this way, please.

Homer, maybe fame and fortune aren't as bad as they say.

If I hear one more thing about the Simpsons, I swear I'm going to scream.

At first they were cute and funny, but now they're just annoying.

Eighteen bucks for this? What a rip-off!

Man, this thing's really gettin' outta hand.

Oh, is there anything they won't do?

Oh Homer, this is awful.

Come to think of it, the guy that sold me this thing did say the wishes would bring grave misfortune. I thought he was just being colorful.

I wish for world peace.

Lisa, that was very selfish of you.

Sorry about the Falklands, old boy.

Ah, forget it. We kind of knew they were yours.

Won't be needing these anymore.

C'MON PEOPLE, NOW / SMILE ON YOUR BROTHER / EVERYBODY GET TOGETHER / TRY TO LOVE ONE ANOTHER RIGHT NOW...

Foolish humans.

Oh yes, Kodos. Earth is now ripe for the plucking.

People of earth. We come to you in the spirit of hostility and menace.

Now, let's be reasonable. We can resolve our differences peacefully.

Your superior intellect is no match for our puny weapons.

Colonel! You've got to do something!

What do you want me to do? I'm a baker now.

I had a bad dream. Could I sleep in your bed?

They're konking us with a club. Wished we saved an A-bomb or two.

Move along humans.

This is all the Simpsons' fault.

Before I was just bored with their antics and their merchandise. Now I wish they were dead.

Jeez, now we're slaves. This paw sucks.

Ok, Ok. I'll make a wish that can't backfire. I wish for a turkey sandwich, on rye bread, with lettuce and mustard, And...AND! I don't want any zombie turkeys, I don't want to turn into a turkey myself, and I don't want any other weird surprises. You got it?

Hey... Hmm. Not bad. Nice hot mustard... good bread... Turkey's a little dry. The turkey's a little dry?! Oh foul, accursed thing! What demon from the depths of hell created thee?!

Hey, fellow slave, is that one of those monkey paw dealies that lets you wish for things?

Yeah, but I gotta warn you that this thing is ee ... Yeah, that's what it is. Wanna try it? Heh, heh, heh.

Okely-dokely.

Ohh, would ya look at that?

Kneel before my slingshot, puny earthling.

Well, I guess my first wish is to get rid of those awful aliens.

Aarsh. He's got a board with a nail in it!

And save humanity will ya.

RUN, KODOS!

Well, Kang, it seems the Earthlings won.

Did they?... That board with the nail in it may have defeated us. But the humans won't stop there. They'll make bigger boards and bigger nails. Soon, they will make a board with a nail so big it will destroy them all.

Hey, Homer! This little thing-a-ma-jig really works great. Now that I've saved the earth, maybe I oughtta spruce up the ol' homestead.

I wish I had a Monkey's Paw.

Bart... Bart...

Huh?... S'matter?

I'll give you a candy necklace.

Climb aboard.

Thanks, Bart.

Less talk, more sleep.