jamesliu23/simpsons · Datasets at Hugging Face

text stringlengths 7 697
Well, let's get on with the testing.
Roll on, roll on, Alpha Tau -- Bow wow wow wow Bow wow wow wow...
Hmmm, if I didn't know better, I'd swear he was trying to moon us.
What would each of you say is your worst quality?
Well, I am a workaholic.
I push myself too hard.
Dear Marge, XXX. Homer.
Well... It takes me a long time to learn anything... I'm kind of a goof-off...
Okay, that'll do.
... Little stuff starts disappearing from the workplace.
That's enough! Next: there's a problem with the reactor, what do you do?
There's a problem with the reactor?! We're all gonna die!!!
Did you get the job?
Nah, they wanted someone good. Story of my life.
Oh, Homie. Hey, come over here and feel our baby kicking.
Wow! Kid, I won't let you down.
I swear to you, when you come out of there, the first thing you're gonna see is a man with a good job.
Yeah, the doctor.
... And when ye tallow hardens, we remove it from yon mold.
What a crappy candle!
You've ruined our vacation!
... You, gentle sir, are fired!
Oh, hello, young man.
Good evening, Madame. You have been selected by the good people of Slash-Co to reap the benefits of their new Nev-R-Dull knife-edge. Here... shake hands with the Slash-Co.
Handle first, handle first...
I quit! I quit!
I thought you said you liked dogs.
Hey, who wants to get rich today?
Me! Me! Me! Me! Me! I said it first!
First, let me assure you that this is not one of those shady "pyramid schemes" you've been hearing about.
All right! Stick it to the Man.
No sir. Our model is the trapezoid that guarantees each investor an 800% return within hours of your initial...
Uh-oh! The cops!
"Fourth Notice"... "90 Days Overdue"... "We Break Thumbs"... Homer, what are we going to do?
I don't know, I don't know --
Repo Man! I'm here for the baby's things.
Crib, mobile, monitor... oh, and the lady's ring, I'm afraid.
Oh dear...
Repossessing stuff is the hardest part of my job.
"Dear Marge... By the time you read this, I will be gone. You deserve all the finest things in the world. And although I can give them to you, they will be repossessed and I will be hunted down like a dog. Also, it has become clear that your family doesn't want me here."
Shut up with that pen-scratching down there!
I will send you every cent I earn for the baby. But you will not see me again until I am a man.
That is so sad.
Oh, c'mon, honey. You know how it turns out. After all, you wouldn't be here today if I hadn't become the responsible head of a household.
Hey Homer, can we have a can of frosting for lunch?
"You will not see me again until I am a man." Oh, Homer, Homer.
There, there, dear. We're all in shock. I thought he'd two-time you for a while first.
This taco is full of hair.
Uh huh. There's your explanation.
Should we tell Marge where he is?
Nah. Let her read about it in the Society page.
Homer ?!
Marge, listen... We just saw...
Big shots with their stainless steel lunchboxes...
They get donuts?
That's right. All the colors of the rainbow.
Marge, what are you doing up? You need your rest, dear.
I heard a noise outside and thought it might be Homer.
What the hell. Marge I've got two-and-a-half words for you. Gulp 'N' Blow.
Yeah, what do you want?
My husband by my side.
You want fries with that?
Holy cow, you're as big as a house.
Homer... Come home with me.
No, Marge, I just can't. I mean, look at me. I'm a Trainee... They won't even tell me what's in the secret sauce. But I can't buy you a decent wedding ring.
Any ring is fine as long as it's from you.
Marge, for you.
Would you mind if I took it off now? The oil is burning my finger.
Oh, sure.
Homer, do you know why I married you?
Because I knocked you up?
No, because I love you.
Come home soon.
That's it. That's it. Come closer...
Ironic, isn't it. The hunter has become the hunted. Oh God, Smithers, I feel so alive.
You the boss?
I'll call security, sir.
Step aside! I'll deliver this baby!
Well, listen to me, Mr. Bigshot... if you're looking for the kind of employee who takes abuse and never sticks up for himself... I'm your man. You can treat me like dirt and I'll still kiss your butt and call it ice cream. And if you don't like it... I can change!!
Hold the phone, Smithers... I like your attitude. Feisty yet spineless.
Sir, this man not only failed the aptitude test, he got trapped in a closet on his way out.
I don't care. I haven't been this impressed since I first laid eyes on a young boot-lick named Waylon Smithers.
You mean?
Welcome aboard, son.
I got the job. I got the job! Whoo hoo! Only in America could I get a job!
Who was that young hellcat, Smithers?
Homer Simpson, sir.
Simpson, eh? I'll remember that name.
Marge!... Marge!...
You're a little late. She's gone to the hospital.
The hospital?
I'll drive you.
Thanks, mom.
Don't ever call me that.
Marge! Marge, where's the baby?
Right where you left it.
Shut up!
Hey, listen fatboy --
No, you listen! This is my wife and this is my kid, and I'm paying for this delivery, so if you want to stay, you better give me some respect!
Homer, does this mean --

Well, let's get on with the testing.

Roll on, roll on, Alpha Tau -- Bow wow wow wow Bow wow wow wow...

Hmmm, if I didn't know better, I'd swear he was trying to moon us.

What would each of you say is your worst quality?

Well, I am a workaholic.

I push myself too hard.

Dear Marge, XXX. Homer.

Well... It takes me a long time to learn anything... I'm kind of a goof-off...

Okay, that'll do.

... Little stuff starts disappearing from the workplace.

That's enough! Next: there's a problem with the reactor, what do you do?

There's a problem with the reactor?! We're all gonna die!!!

Did you get the job?

Nah, they wanted someone good. Story of my life.

Oh, Homie. Hey, come over here and feel our baby kicking.

Wow! Kid, I won't let you down.

I swear to you, when you come out of there, the first thing you're gonna see is a man with a good job.

Yeah, the doctor.

... And when ye tallow hardens, we remove it from yon mold.

What a crappy candle!

You've ruined our vacation!

... You, gentle sir, are fired!

Oh, hello, young man.

Good evening, Madame. You have been selected by the good people of Slash-Co to reap the benefits of their new Nev-R-Dull knife-edge. Here... shake hands with the Slash-Co.

Handle first, handle first...

I quit! I quit!

I thought you said you liked dogs.

Hey, who wants to get rich today?

Me! Me! Me! Me! Me! I said it first!

First, let me assure you that this is not one of those shady "pyramid schemes" you've been hearing about.

All right! Stick it to the Man.

No sir. Our model is the trapezoid that guarantees each investor an 800% return within hours of your initial...

Uh-oh! The cops!

"Fourth Notice"... "90 Days Overdue"... "We Break Thumbs"... Homer, what are we going to do?

I don't know, I don't know --

Repo Man! I'm here for the baby's things.

Crib, mobile, monitor... oh, and the lady's ring, I'm afraid.

Oh dear...

Repossessing stuff is the hardest part of my job.

"Dear Marge... By the time you read this, I will be gone. You deserve all the finest things in the world. And although I can give them to you, they will be repossessed and I will be hunted down like a dog. Also, it has become clear that your family doesn't want me here."

Shut up with that pen-scratching down there!

I will send you every cent I earn for the baby. But you will not see me again until I am a man.

That is so sad.

Oh, c'mon, honey. You know how it turns out. After all, you wouldn't be here today if I hadn't become the responsible head of a household.

Hey Homer, can we have a can of frosting for lunch?

"You will not see me again until I am a man." Oh, Homer, Homer.

There, there, dear. We're all in shock. I thought he'd two-time you for a while first.

This taco is full of hair.

Uh huh. There's your explanation.

Should we tell Marge where he is?

Nah. Let her read about it in the Society page.

Homer ?!

Marge, listen... We just saw...

Big shots with their stainless steel lunchboxes...

They get donuts?

That's right. All the colors of the rainbow.

Marge, what are you doing up? You need your rest, dear.

I heard a noise outside and thought it might be Homer.

What the hell. Marge I've got two-and-a-half words for you. Gulp 'N' Blow.

Yeah, what do you want?

My husband by my side.

You want fries with that?

Holy cow, you're as big as a house.

Homer... Come home with me.

No, Marge, I just can't. I mean, look at me. I'm a Trainee... They won't even tell me what's in the secret sauce. But I can't buy you a decent wedding ring.

Any ring is fine as long as it's from you.

Marge, for you.

Would you mind if I took it off now? The oil is burning my finger.

Oh, sure.

Homer, do you know why I married you?

Because I knocked you up?

No, because I love you.

Come home soon.

That's it. That's it. Come closer...

Ironic, isn't it. The hunter has become the hunted. Oh God, Smithers, I feel so alive.

You the boss?

I'll call security, sir.

Step aside! I'll deliver this baby!

Well, listen to me, Mr. Bigshot... if you're looking for the kind of employee who takes abuse and never sticks up for himself... I'm your man. You can treat me like dirt and I'll still kiss your butt and call it ice cream. And if you don't like it... I can change!!

Hold the phone, Smithers... I like your attitude. Feisty yet spineless.

Sir, this man not only failed the aptitude test, he got trapped in a closet on his way out.

I don't care. I haven't been this impressed since I first laid eyes on a young boot-lick named Waylon Smithers.

You mean?

Welcome aboard, son.

I got the job. I got the job! Whoo hoo! Only in America could I get a job!

Who was that young hellcat, Smithers?

Homer Simpson, sir.

Simpson, eh? I'll remember that name.

Marge!... Marge!...

You're a little late. She's gone to the hospital.

The hospital?

I'll drive you.

Thanks, mom.

Don't ever call me that.

Marge! Marge, where's the baby?

Right where you left it.

Shut up!

Hey, listen fatboy --

No, you listen! This is my wife and this is my kid, and I'm paying for this delivery, so if you want to stay, you better give me some respect!

Homer, does this mean --