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t3_3b8gvb | jobs | Met a CEO on a plane would love to parlay this into a job. Advice? | So a touch of background. I was on a plane, and ended up having some decent not-so-small talk with a guy who later revealed himself to be the owner and founder of his own company, which is one of the top firms in It's location. We talked about his business, my schooling (graduating with a BA in Business Marketing in august). He asked me for feedback on his side project and I asked him for advice on my startup. He was a really cool and honestly a laid back guy as well and we talked about some random stuff as well. We exchanged contact info before parting ways. I sent him an email a week or so later but no response, which I wrote off as him being a busy ceo and what not.
Anyway I would love to work for this guy at his firm, or even on his side project. I'm not sure on how to go about parlaying this unique meeting, into a potential advantage when trying to apply at this firm. Should I email him before the application process, during the process? Should I attempt to get him on the phone or something. Not sure how to go about this, and even what to say, professionally if I were to contact him. | Met a CEO on a plane, kinda hit it off, would like to work for him. Looking for Advice on how to parlay this into a job opportunity |
t3_1jwwt4 | relationships | (22/f) the daily dose of self-doubt -.-" | right, so im a 22 y/o female and i broke up with my ex about 2 months ago. it was for the best of both of us, so i am okay with how things went and so is he, we are both 10 times happier.
the thing is, that what he said to me (he was the one breaking up) just wont get out of my mind and it is really getting me down. i never thought of myself as perfect or whatever, but when he said he loves me as a friend or sister, but not as a lover (aka he is not IN love with me), i was just so hurt. what does that even mean?
... ive always been into gaming and loved it, ever since this breakup i sometimes catch myself wondering if i should stop it cause maybe it makes me too much of a "bro" ?! ... no matter what i do now, i doubt myself constantly.
i caught myself using a lot more make up, buying a lot more new clothes and changing my hair TONS of times, i am starting to get tired of it and losing track of who i actually am but i cant seem to stop cause else i feel like something is wrong with me or that i could be/do better ...
i am aware i need to get a grip and should stop feeling sorry for myself or bad that i wasnt my ex's taste or whatever, but... my mind wont let me, im just so restless...
im also starting to doubt ANYONE who compliments me and scan for errors in the compliment, or get down if it wasnt the "biggest compliment possible", its so pathetic and annoys me so much, i dont wanna be like this :( i just wanna be me again -___- sorry if this was utterly boring and an annoying post, but if anyone ever has been through such a "phase" (i hope its a phase...) and you have some advice, please share your thoughts T__T | i know the breakup was for the best of both of us, yet i keep doubting MYSELF and dont really know who i am anymore :( |
t3_2m2xl3 | relationships | My [21 M] girlfriend [21F] may have cheated on me with a few guys (and some girls), but I'm not sure. How do I find out? | We've been together for more than year, but she was studying abroad for about 6 months. Earlier today, I was sitting in her room while she was getting ready for school, and I saw her diary sitting on her desk. I'm usually not one to snoop, but I know she keeps a list of the people she's slept with in the back of the diary (I have no idea why), and curiosity got the better of me. I flipped it open, and saw five names after mine. I was really upset, but I kept it together. She doesn't know I saw.
I guess there are a couple of possibilities:
1. She's been sleeping with other people while we've been together (as in, she's been in the US with me at the time)
2. She only hooked up with people when she was abroad.
If it was the first, I'd be really hurt, and I'd probably break up with her.
But if it was the second, I think I'd understand. I slept with people while she was abroad, so I think it would be wrong to hold it against her. We were apart for a long time, and we both got lonely. She did make it seem like she hadn't slept with anyone (she called once after kissing some guy in a club and tearfully apologized), so I guess it would make me a bit upset, but it would be pretty hypocritical to get too pissed about it.
My question: How should I go about figuring out which one it is? Do I just ask her outright? If I do, how should I phrase the question? | My girlfriend probably has slept with other people, but if she did it while she was abroad, I don't really mind. How do I find out the story? |
t3_2131fi | relationships | I [20F] hate my fiancee's [25M] friends. | My fiancè and I have been together for over two years. I'm 8 months pregnant and we couldn't be happier. My family loves him, his family loves me. We're totally in love and happy. I'm the only girl that he's ever loved.
But, we live in a neighborhood that he's lived in his whole life and occasionally I'll have to see his old friends.
I really don't like some of his friends. I probably only really like 2/6 of them.. My SO doesn't really care for them either but he feels like he has to talk to them and play nice since they've known eachother since they were in diapers.
Some of his friends are just plain rude and will act like I'm not even there. I have extreme social anxiety and don't know how to react to this. My SO doesn't seem to notice... But it all could be in my head since I don't really try to talk to them either..
How do I stand my ground? | I hate most of my SO's friends. Some act like I'm not even in the room with them. I have extreme social anxiety.. How do I stand my ground? |
t3_4xrhds | relationships | Me [24/F] with my ___ [26 M/] Talks to me all day and night but never wants to hang out? | Hi All!
So I'm really confused and hope someone could help me. So this guy took me out on two dates we really hit it off. We've texted everyday since and of course before hand. All night and day, we send pictures back and forth etc of each other, hobbies, our day etc.
The thing is he never ever asks me to hangout. We live super close. He goes to parties, dinners, shopping all in the vicinity of where I live and never invites me. All he wants to do is hang out with his guy friends. I'm so frustrated and very confused? Is he not interested in me? I asked him out once to join me with friends a double date type vibe my friends and his But he said no, that he had plans to game.
Yet he still messages me religiously. What type of guy is this?
Should I go ghost. I tried making him jealous by going to parties with my guy friends and snapping it. Staying active and busy. I even refuse to answer sometimes. I honestly can't figure this out?
Also note he is flirty with me but not sexual, we have kissed and he pays when we go out. What is this? | Talks to me like his girlfriend.. never takes me out? or has no interest in seeing me/ sleeping with me? |
t3_25gp45 | askwomenadvice | (M/21) I have been with my girlfriend (20) for eight months, she proposed to me a month ago, asked me to move in with her and I said yes. I'm not sure whether I made the right decision. | I love my girlfriend very much. I think she is an incredible and beautiful human being, and she is absolutely everything to me. We hardly ever fight or argue, and if we do we talk to each other about how we feel and we work through it together. In that respect, we are a really well functioning couple. This is the first time I have had doubts that I haven't shared with her, and I feel pretty bad about it.
I'm coming to the end of my degree and she is just starting hers. Last month, I got rushed to hospital and she proposed to me while I was in a hospital bed. I said yes. When I got released from hospital, I told her that it was okay if emotions were running high and she wanted to wait. I would understand, but she said that this is what she wants and I am what she wants. Obviously, I am super happy because I love her and I see an amazing future with her too.
I currently support her a little bit with my student loan - just with groceries and a few utilities. As I am coming to the end of my degree, I have zero money and I can't move back home. I'm a bit stuck. However, she is starting her degree soon and said that we could get a place together and she would support me until I get on my feet. We already practically live together, so I'm not worried about that.
I am really worried about two things:
Firstly, your university years are awesome and I don't want to burden her with our relationship if she wants to explore things. As you can see, we're both pretty young.
Secondly, neither of us have told anybody that we are engaged. I think this is partially because I'm up shit creek with finals at the moment, but perhaps a little bit because I worry that other people won't take us seriously because we are quite young. | I really love my girlfriend but I think things are moving too quickly, but I am in a position where I need a bit of stability. What do I do? |
t3_53njtm | self | TIMU by falling for a Chinese product scam advertised here on reddit! Although feeling rather foolish, I thought I'd warn others to prevent them from the same fate. | One day I saw an advertisement at the top of reddit for a new online watch store that was giving away free product in exchange for a review, customer only need pay shipping ($20). They claimed to be a new company looking for feedback, so I checked out their website and at the time, it said they were based in Japan. I was apprehensive at first, but considering how little shipping was, I thought I'd give it a go.
I'm currently outside the US, so I wasn't surprised when shipping took almost 2 months, and was comforted by the correspondence I had with the company for that time. They answered questions, gave tracking info, and all in all started to look more legit. Then I read an update on their website that they have relocated to California. Suspicion intensifies.
Now I just received the watch, same as pictured, and I realize how right I was to feel unsure about this whole deal because the watch is a cheap chinese-alibaba-esque POS. Faux leather with skewed stitching and poor gluing that is visible at some ends, two of the buttons are purely cosmetic with zero function, and I'm certain it isn't real silver. Weight is a big give away. Looks nice though, so there's that.
Never thought my first post would be Today I Messed Up (TIMU), but anyway, I wanted to post the companies website and warn others about such scams so hopefully I can save someone else from being duped.
Company name is NileShops at
BUYER BEWARE!!! | Paid $20 shipping for a "free" watch in exchange for a review and received a cheap Chinese POS I could have bought on the streets of Cambodia for $4. |
t3_1dqlr5 | relationship_advice | 19/F is fed up with extremely jealous 21/M | Alright where do I begin, Ive been dating this guy since I was in grade 10, and he was in grade 12 (3 years). We've had our ups and downs and are arguments mainly stem from jealousy on his part. Basically any relationship with a male makes him feel threatened. I lost all my male friends since dating him because he's jealous. Last night we went to a local pub with live music, my good friend invited us out. We were drinking and eventually moved seats with me and my friend sitting in the front row of chairs and him sitting behind me (on his own accord, as he could have easily pulled up a chair next to me). I asked him multiple times to sit next to me because he was awkwardly behind us by himself. He refused. At the end of the bands set I turned around to talk to him and he was visibly pissed. I asked him what he wanted to do and he replied in a cynical voice about being ignored and not giving a fuck and to keep ignoring him. My friend was obviously put out. He proceeded to get angrier and was like why would you even get me to come you just wanted to gawk at the musicians and whisper. At this point I hugged my friend bye and was like ok Im gonna leave now. I leave he follows me and we proceed to get in a huge fight about how we were whispering about guys and I ignored him. He threatened to kill himself because I obviously broke up with him. This isn't the first (or worst) episode of public jealousy that has left me extremely embarrassed. Im leaving for a 3 month internship in 2 weeks. Its hard to stay broken up.. hes my best friend despite this flaw. He doesn't understand that he is in the wrong, and today got mad about 2 guys that liked my picture that I met 3 months ago. He's gotten somewhat better but I just don't know what to do, he's extremely difficult to break up with (I've tried before), and says I'm all that matters in his life and with out me he's nothing. | Boyfriend is extremely jealous of girlfriend of 3 years, so much that I cant take him out drinking because he could cause a scene. |
t3_2csixh | tifu | TIFU by not flushing. | **Today** I went to get my schedule at my high school. I realize I really have to poop, so I go into the bathroom. But I don't poop in public bathrooms. This is probably only the 3rd (and probably last) time I've ever used the public bathroom to poop.
So I get into the bathroom and I get into a stall; the only one that actually could close. It's pretty dirty, the toilet has pee around it and in it. I don't want to touch anything so I don't flush the pee or wipe the toilet seat (not that there was pee on it). I put a lot toilet paper to sit on while I poop and I let it rip.
So there I am, sitting, thinking, 'why didn't I just poop at home?' and then I finally poop. But... When I pooped, I got splashback... with the pee inside the toilet. Other people's pee splashedback into me. I sit there, and... just think about my life. I'm thinking will I ever see the light of day again? Should I move to a new country? I couldn't accept it... | Pooped in a toilet with other people's pee inside of it, had splashback and got other people pee up my butthole. why didn't I flush before i used it? |
t3_z1vhn | relationships | am (21/f) i just not cut out for long distance? | i've been dating this guy (26/m) for ~ 3 months. In a month, I'll be moving back to school which is 2-3hours away while he will be in the area. Last week, he left to visit his family in the east coast and won't be back for another couple of days. I haven't heard from him in 2 days and i'm starting to get anxious.... i don't know what it's going to be like when we start our LDR in a month so i'm starting to think that maybe i'm just not cut out for LDRs. Should I cut my losses and get out now? | haven't spoken to my bf in 2 days, starting to feel anxious and am not sure we'll last in a LDR. |
t3_46nxnv | relationships | Me [18 M] with my __girlfriens_ [17 F] of three months and she dumped me because her ex has come into her life again | So i've been with this amazing girl for three months and her first lover (ex) has come back into her life after 6 months she has been with him 2 years and 4 years have passed and she still misses him sometimes.
She told me he keeps coming back to her and i'm not the first to experience this she has been with 2 other guys and when her first lover comes back after 4 5 months and gives her hopes just to make her broke up with the guy she is currently with.
So a week ago he came back to her again and we had a fight and she broke up with me i asked for her apology and i said that i want a second chance she said that she doesn't know what to do and doesn't want relationships gor a while plus she has a past that is haunting her.
We still talk but mostly about her ex and how she is not hoping to be with him because he has a college to finish and still has 2 more years she said she had enough of this because he stays 1 2 weeks then he leaves again.
So i wrote this because i don't know what to do to get her back. Should i be a supportive friend and help her? Or should i move on but i rather not do this part because i still love her very much. | Ex keeps coming back and she broke up with me because she needs time and i don't know what to do. Please help me!! |
t3_1dfm4g | relationships | My [20F] boyfriend [21M] acts like a psycho when he gets mad | We've been dating for almost a year, and in the beginning the only time I would see him get mad was at videogames. If he was really frustrated, he would hit the desk or something. Pretty normal, everybody does that sometimes. But in the past few months, probably because he's more comfortable with me, when he has really bad luck in a game, he's been throwing empty soda cans at the walls, hitting the desk REALLY hard, and even picked up my keyboard and slammed it down so hard that all the keys flew off (some of them are still missing). Still, this is your generic nerd rage. Not much to be worried about.
Today he got an order from amazon and it was defective. He almost ripped it up, barely restrained himself from smashing his cell phone, and ended up throwing the defective product at the wall before storming out and driving away without saying a word. I'm just sitting here thinking 'what the hell happened?' I would never act like that at all, but especially not in front of him.
It makes me wonder what he'll do if he ever gets that mad at me. And it reminds me of my psychotic brother who I've completely cut off contact with. (He has a long history of screaming in people's faces, throwing lamps, glasses, forks, etc. at them, kicking holes in doors, shoving people, and telling them to kill themselves. My last straw with him was when he picked me up out of my bed while I was sleeping and threw me on the floor.)
How can I tell my boyfriend that his fits of ridiculous rage make me uncomfortable and less attracted to him? It might be an irrational fear, because he's never been violent with me, but I'm terrified of discussing this with him. | boyfriend throws things around the room when he's mad, freaks me out because my older brother with a serious mental illness terrified me for years with the same behavior |
t3_3s1606 | relationships | Me [23F] slept with another grad student [23M]. I have just found out he has a girlfriend. I'm so mad at him but have to sit next to him everyday. | I have just started a PhD and my desk is next to this guy, Sean, who has also just started. We get along really well and have been flirting a lot so I had a feeling something was going to happen. Last night a group of students, including Sean and I, went out for some drinks and all got stupid drunk. The night ended with me going home with Sean and we had sex. We're both consenting adults and, initially, I didn't regret what happened.
When I got home this morning one of my roommate, another girl who has just started a PhD, asked me what had happened last night. I told her the story and then she said "you do know he has a girlfriend?". I honestly didn't and so I didn't actually believe her. She showed me his Facebook (I don't have Facebook) and it quite obviously says "in a relationship with ....." And his profile pic is him and his gf.
I'm actually so fucking mad because now I feel like a tramp and I have to sit next to him every day. Did he just think, or hope I wouldn't find out? I don't know what to say to him. I kind of feel like calling him now because it will be awkward as hell if I confront him tomorrow at work but it's always going to be awkward now. And I don't want to make a big scene because I don't really want people to know I slept with him if it's common knowledge he has a girlfriend. Ahhhhh. I just don't know what to do and need some advice. | I had sex with a guy who I now found out has a girlfriend and have to sit next to him every day. |
t3_32thlb | personalfinance | College Student: To Save or Pay Off Loans? | Hi everyone. I'm in the opposite situation of most college students. I am a freshman in mechanical engineering with a minor in lubrication. Due to my minor, Chevron has hired me for a summer internship. It pays extremely well, and between that job, scholarships, and the federal pell grant, I will have about $2,400 left over after 12 months of expenses (rent, books, food, etc). Should I use this extra money to start paying off my federal loans from 2014-2015 or should I continue adding to my savings fund (currently have $2,000)?
Basically, I am trying to find out if it is smarter to have a large emergency fund or to reduce my loan balances. My loans have no interest until after I graduate, at which point I pay 5% interest. I have $5,500 in student loans from 2014-2015. | As a college student, should I build a large emergency fund (~$4500) or should I start paying off my no-interest loans from previous year? |
t3_25x1wp | relationships | Me [20 F] with my boyfriend [22 M] six months. I am extremely jealous of his ex-girlfriend. It is ruining our relationship! | I have never been one to hold someone's past against them. My boyfriend and his ex had some really wonderful experiences together, and she is friends with quite a few of my friends and his friends (We all grew up in the same small town). I see her more often than I'd like to.
Even though I know he loves me and no longer wants to be with her, I am continually letting the idea of her and him together eat me up inside. It is driving me insane. I cannot seem to get over the fact that she is going to be around us occasionally.
I know that he will probably always love her, because it was his first love. She broke up with him almost two years ago. Him and I have been friends for a while and sort of just fell in love without expecting to. He makes me very happy but I am contemplating breaking up with him because of my own insecurities. I can't seem to get this girl out of my head, half of what he owns is from some place they've been together or something she has bought him. It's impossible not to think of her or to go a day without hearing her name from one of my friends.
I constantly compare myself to her, and dwell on his past with her. | My own insecurities of my boyfriend's past love is making me want to leave him. Can anyone offer some advice? |
t3_l7xpu | AskReddit | Reddit, I haven't forgotten him in 5 years. I want to find him, but have next to no information. What should I do? | 5 years ago, when I was in grade 8, I met a guy in my Confirmation class. We had gone to summer camp together when we were little and we only spoke one time. We remembered each other right away when we saw each other in grade 8, and I liked him instantly, although I never knew why. I got the feeling that it was mutual even though we hardly said a word to each other. I have never felt anything quite like it. After we got confirmed, I never saw him again, but he has been on my mind ever since.
I've gotten it into my head that I want to try and find him, but I (1) don't want to look like a creep and (2) only have his first name, which is extremely common.
I have been out of touch with the only person who I know that might have some of his contact information, and I don't know how to ask him for this guy's e-mail. He's also not someone that I like very much, and I'd prefer not to talk to him if I don't have to. | met a guy 5 years ago & have been thinking about him ever since. Want to find him, but only have his first name and a possibly mutual contact (whom I don't like & haven't talked to in years). |
t3_4cawae | tifu | TIFU by chasing a squirrel | Okay, so I have a bird feeder that feeds a lot of birds and I like to watch them out of my window. Lately I've been noticing the bird feed disappearing rather fast and thought to myself "man these birds must really love this shit." Wrong. Wrong. Finally I see its this squirrel who's a big fat fucker who climbs up to my bird feeder and knocks it all out to gorge himself and none for the birds. So what do i do? I go buy a pretty cheap bb gun to pop him one good in the ass except each time I try to pop him I miss and he runs away always to comeback and steal all the food. Well today I thought I'd try something different. He usually sees me round the corner and hauls ass so I can never get a good shot off so I just ran out there as fast as I could to cut him off so he can't run into the woods and hide. He runs towards my bushes (which are rather big) and I run towards the bushes and try to jump through them except the bushes don't give way and I flipped like some type of QB running it in over the defensive line knocking the wind out of myself. As I'm lying there wondering if I broke anything trying to catch my breathe the squirrel is up in a tree laughing at me or what seems to be squirrel laughter | I chased a squirrel and tried to jump my bushes except they didn't give way and I knocked the wind out of myself. |
t3_fkk88 | AskReddit | Calling Reddit: Help me win tuition money :) | Throwaway account here.
So Reddit, here's the deal. My close friends and I are competing in a marketing challenge held by NESTEA and Pizza Pizza. We are doing this because the grand prize will be a **$7500 Scholarship** for each of us, which would be HUGE help to pay for school... and I could really use it.
I'm aware that this isn't the best use of Reddit as there are many other people that have much more pressing issues and they could be using help from this wonderful community. BUT it only takes two seconds to help, so if you've read this far, then please perform the following steps:
1. Click
2. "Like" the video at the BOTTOM of the page
One of our criteria requires us to generate likes on our video and I know you guys will be a huge help. Leave a comment if you wish as well :)
Your support will be greatly appreciated so please take 2 seconds of your time and help out a fellow Redditor :). Thanks a ton. One love. | chance to win a scholarship for school, just "like" the video at the bottom of this page: . Thanks! |
t3_1kmwbx | relationships | My [26M] three year relationship with my girlfriend [26F] ended today. | I really thought we would be together forever. We were going to move in with each other. I thought we would get married and have kids. I *wanted* to marry her. I've never met a girl as cool as her. She was the smartest, funniest girl I've ever known. And gorgeous. Drop dead beautiful. But now she's decided she wants someone else. She met him at a party a week ago. They stayed up all night together, talking til five in the morning. She promised me she didn't like him like that, that she just wanted him as a friend. Last night she got drunk with him. They made out at the bar they were at. She stayed at his place that night. They fooled around. This morning she called out of work, stayed there all day, and fooled around more. All of this got dropped on me today like a bomb, completely out of nowhere. We've been rocky for the past couple months, but I thought things had been going better for the past few weeks. I was trying so hard to make her happy, to make us better.
I'm not looking for advice. I just need to vent. I lost my best friend today. We would talk every day, all the time. I could tell her anything. She was the only person in my life who was like that. Now I'm alone. I have friends, but it's not the same. She had my heart. I could be intimate with her. Not just physically, but emotionally. I could connect with her. Now I'm alone and it is awful. I'm just so fucking sad. I have no one like that to open up to. I know that time conquers all and I will be alright eventually, but right now I'm just so horribly sad.
She knows my reddit name. She'll probably read this at some point. I know hers too. Is there any way I can block myself from checking it? If I don't I'll be trying to see what she's been posting. | Three year relationship with the girl I thought I'd be with forever ended very, very abruptly today. I am devastated. |
t3_36f6b7 | relationships | Is it a good idea for me [M22] to delete/unfriend my ex [F24] off of social media after a vicious and immature breakup? | ***Job done. Thanks to all, feel better now there is literally no method of communication. Friends are supportive and understand why I had to do it. Here's to a new chapter.***
Hi guys,
**This is a semi-update post under a different throwaway, it wouldn't let me post as the old one.** ***[LINK HERE] Things haven't worked out great between Clara and I and the vast majority has just been arguments on social media (private) or by text and very little in person.
So basically she has been extremely immature and broken up with me on Facebook chat after saying "I'm done" numerous times over the past two weeks or so yet continuing discussing our relationship. Returning readers will understand my frustration at the lack of understanding and piss-poor communication that there is between us but I was hoping that we could work something out, clearly not.
We have a lot of mutual friends, some of whom I still get on with and see occasionally, even though I've moved out of town. However, I am really worried that Clara will end up spoiling my friendships, especially if I go and block/delete here off of social media and what-not.
*What is the best course of action? I don't want to continue this any longer, my family disapprove of the relationship after seeing her true colours which is reason alone but the only thing stopping me from cutting communication off altogether is the possible repercussions. | Vicious breakup over private message, worried what mutual friends will think if I break all communication as I'm no longer in the city to defend myself. |
t3_2sn3i7 | relationships | Would love some advice on how to fix issues arising from a difference in sex drives between me(23m) and my SO(25f). | I'll try to keep it short, but this is an ongoing issue between she and I that has some background now.
Basically, I'm a guy who is incredibly attracted to my SO. We live together and just being around her makes me want sex. I'm content with once a day, or more if oppertunity allows. I do have an incredibly high sex drive though, and would honestly take as much as I can get.
However, her sex drive is much lower than mine, and she rejects my advances incredibly often, so much to the point now that I feel she is more interested in watching tv than being intimate with me, and that the attraction isn't mutual.
Now, the main problem with this is,l that I get an incredibly strong internal feeling of sexual frustration when we go a while without sex, so much so that it effects my mood in general. I try to control it, but I just can't.
We have talked about it multiple times, and is now basically an argument that escalates each time. Each time it comes up, the sex increases for about a week, then goes right back to as it was.
What can we do to fix this? Or is it a case of incompatibility?
I have more info about it all if you ask. | SO(25f) and I(23m) have incredibly different sex drives, and it's driving us apart. |
t3_42u5o2 | relationships | I [20F] have been with my boyfriend [20M] for two years, I'm bored and suddenly have wandering eyes | I've been with my bf, Josh, for around two years. We have a pretty solid relationship, and we talk frequently about the future (marriage, kids, etc.). For most of this relationship, I've been pretty content. Josh is funny, sweet, and is a good best friend. Most nights, we make dinner, watch a movie, and chill out.
Recently, I've been bored out of my skull with our relationship. Everything seems perfect. Sometimes I wish we would just fight because I feel like I'm holding in my feelings about our relationship. I think I might be losing interest in him and that scares me.
In the past, I really only had eyes for Josh. Now, I've been attracted to more guys around me, and I've been worried about the fact that I wouldn't be destroyed by cheating a little bit.
I have been cheated on before, and it was the shittiest thing in the world. Now it seems I'm becoming the potential cheater. In one of my previous relationships, I had an emotional affair with Josh behind the back of my then-SO. In the duration of my current relationship, there has been one other guy that i had a brief fling with. My boyfriend expressed little frustration with this. I was almost wishing for him to be upset with me. I feel like he doesn't appreciate me anymore and its wearing on me. During sex, he zones out and finishes the job.
I'm young, I've been working on my fitness, and I'm an attractive person. I want to show my body off to someone who appreciates it, unlike Josh.
I realize I may sound illogical or whiny, but honestly I'm confused my myself and where to go from here. Is this the end of our relationship? How do I stop myself from checking out other guys? How do I reconcile these feelings? | Bored in current relationship, have a bit of a history with cheating, stuck between leaving bf and trying to fix what we have. |
t3_2iqh7z | offmychest | "Nonsuicidal Self-Injury Among Nonclinical College Women" | Today for my sociology class I get to read an article with the above title. People always joke about triggers, and I make fun of people who seem to use it interchangeably with "being annoyed by something" and such, but yeah. Now I feel like I'm on the other side of the equation.
It's weird reading a scientific, sociological article written by researchers explaining, or trying to explain, why you do what you do. It's weird hearing them talk about it in a very factual, to-the-point tone. It's weird reading, "People think these women do it because x, y, and z" and I'm sitting here like, hm, I don't identify with that. Is there something even more wrong with me? And the statistics are sad and frightening, and I'm a part of those numbers that they're reporting, that I'm reading and taking notes on.
At the start of the quarter my prof said to the class, this course is gonna handle some sensitive stuff and if you're not emotionally prepared for it then this may not be the place for you. Which I appreciated and totally agreed with. But honestly, the stuff that went through my mind when he said that were things like trauma, drug abuse, etc. I didn't even think about cutting. I haven't done it in three months, and before that I was clean for two years, but it's still really hard to not pick it up again.
I'm scared to go to quiz section tomorrow and possibly talk about this with my classmates. From what I've experienced of the class people already aren't that understanding of "deviant" behaviors. The entire hall laughs at things that make me scream inside, that I can identify with. I'm scared of what they're gonna say. I'm scared of having to defend myself and others like me.
I don't know. | it's just weird and pretty unsettling to read articles for class that are about you. Not, about *me*, you know, but... yeah. |
t3_37heh6 | relationship_advice | Should I [20/f] contact my old friends [20/f] that I had cut off contact with? | Hey everyone,
If you have any advice for me I would love to hear it :)
Towards the end of last year I cut off contact with my two best friends, and now I'm wondering if I should contact them again. As we all go to different colleges, we mainly used to talk via text or facebook messages, never by talking telephone. I would hang out with them individually at least once every fortnight. They were both friends with me but not friends with each other
To give a little background as to why I suddenly cut contact:
I have always felt awkward when hanging out with friends, so I always just mirrored their personalities and to be honest after a while it gets boring pretending to be someone else. Also, we always hung out when it suited them and that annoyed me. I felt like I was always listening to their problems and to what they had to say but I could really add anything else to the friendship aside from just being a listener. I felt like I couldn't open up to them. So yeah, I just cut off contact one day. Childish, yeah I know.
Now this may sound a little conceited (idk it's the best way to describe it) of me but at the time I thought to myself, "these jerks don't really care about me, if they really wanted to hang out they'll contact me first, but the probably won't"
And well since then neither them nor me have messaged each other or hung out.
But recently I have started to change myself and now I'm a little more positive, I feel like I need to move on from the person I once was but at the same time I feel like I shouldn't really be a coward and forget the friends I used to have
My question is: should I just send a facebook or text message explaining why I cut off contact and that I apologize for not considering their feelings or should I just do nothing. Maybe they have already moved on | I cut off contact with all my friends, not really looking to rekindle these friendships but wanna know if I should at least contact them to explain my actions |
t3_39q1oi | relationships | How can I [22M] overachiever balance relationships while still meeting my career/life goals? | Not sure if this is where I should ask this question because it has to do with relationships in general, and is not specific to any one relationship. Feel free to point me in the right direction if it is not.
I feel I am always too busy to really be involved with anyone. I have found people I genuinely enjoy, but it's been tough keeping them in my lives without sacrificing my ambitions. When I'm committed to someone, I often find myself extremely happy in the honeymoon period, and then miserable once that wears off because I find myself not being as productive.
My last serious relationship was over a year ago, and while I have dated since then, all of these tend to end the same way: my having a span of a few weeks where I am super busy and have hardly enough time to sleep, let alone be with someone. After things cool down, I've found it tough to reconnect.
How can I balance and keep up with a budding relationship and balance that with achieving my career goals? | I am an overacheiver/workaholic who has a hard time keeping relationships because of all of the things I'm involved in. How can I balance work/relationships? |
t3_msxit | BreakUps | I broke up with her now 3 months later I am starting to regret it, help me almighty reddit! | Okay so, about 4 months ago I broke up with my girlfriend of 9 months, we got along pretty well our whole relationship with the exception of about a month before I broke up with her. Since the break up I've talked to other girls but I haven't been able to find any one I can relate too or that ive felt the same way about since then. We are both 17 and the biggest issue with getting back together is probably the awkward factor with both sets of parents.
Here's where it gets complicated. I had these hostile feelings towards her mainly from built up anger over the one time she lied to me. She told me that she was becoming best friends with this guy from another school during my sports season ( so she could apparently get more attention from me because she felt like I neglected her.) but now she's over the whole attachment thing and im over the lie.
My friends and parents however have never really been fond of her. And my parents most likely would not approve of us dating, they wouldnt stop me but I have no doubt that they could make things difficult. I really really need help, do I go back to her and try and work things out or should I try and forget about her and move on? | I broke up with my gf 3 months ago but am now deeply regretting doing so. There are other complications but they don't make sense without explanation. |
t3_1odgkp | needadvice | Need some advice for my parents | I'm kinda sad this is going to be my first post to Reddit.
Let me preface this by saying that my parents and I live in the U.S. My mom has had some major problems the past couple of years and I'm hoping someone might be able to steer me (and her) in the right direction to get her some financial help. My parents were unable to afford the $800 a month health insurance cost and they were forced to drop the insurance. Fast forward a year or so and my mom goes into the hospital with a heart attack. She survived and is doing well considering. The problem is with the bills that she has or will receive.
I'm not soliciting for money but I am wondering if anyone has any advice for a charity or some other route that she may be able to pay off these bills. I have offered to help her as much as I can but I am a government employee and since my paycheck is now in limbo, I can't guarantee that I can afford to pay off her expenses for her (I don't make enough to be able to pay if off outright anyway). Again I am just looking for some direction or someone that I or she could talk to so she might get some help with these bills. Thank you all in advance. | Mom had a heart attack with no insurance. Looking for some advice to get her some financial help with the bills. |
t3_ykzc6 | AskReddit | In your opinion, what is the worst song ever made and what makes you hate it? | **[Soulja Boy's "Crank That"] My High School decided to go along with it, so on the school announcements (mandatory that all students watch/listen to it), school dances, and at school convocations played it. So, not only was the school subjecting many unwilling teens to listen to this "music" but they would be inconsistent on playing the radio-edit (e.g. replaces the word "ho" with "ohh") or the original song. They were the ones that got angry at students for saying words like "crap" or "hell", but apparently "supermanning that ho" is perfectly acceptable.
*Bonus Hate:*
**[Ke$ha's "Tik Tok"] and **[Cee Lo Green's "Fuck You"] "Tik Tok" kind of sounded like Katy Perry the first time I heard it, but it got a lot more competitive. "Fuck You" I hated because of only hearing the radio edit 5-6 times a day made it feel like I was a child, and after hearing any song over and over again you just learn to hate it. I hate these songs because I was working in restaurant at the time and it was either "Tik Tok" or "Fuck You" which apparently were the only top 40 hits that the radio station could pay for. | Forget You" radio stations because you only play the same 10 songs from the same few record companies, play censored songs (stupid FCC), and interrupt every other song to tell me you are "commercial free" for 90 minutes today. |
t3_1174qm | relationships | My friend (22/f) had been experiencing hurtful rumors for a long time now, what can I do? | The rumors are of course not true, and they were started and continue to spread by a couple of high school drama makers, she's been experiencing rumors old and new for the past 6 years, up until now they just ignored then and stayed strong but recently one of the rumors split up a couple because she supposed slept with the guy. Its gotten to the point were she can't even make new friends out old friends steer clear of her and she feels bullied. She has confronted the source but she plays innocent and says she didn't start any rumor. I (m/24) have no idea what to do because its her friend circle and she doesn't want me to get involved...even if I do get involved what can I do? I just feel so hopeless that a friend that helped me through so much is hurting and I can't do anything but try to make her laugh when she cries (she doesn't cry alot) | good friend had rumors that aren't true and feeds bullied, I don't know any of the parties involved in the rumors and idk what to do |
t3_3ztaxc | tifu | TIFU by eating "delicious" rancid canned tuna | This actually happened today. It was a normal morning, slept a bit later than normal by about 30 minutes. After I got my shower and stuff, I went downstairs to see my dad making me a tuna sandwich for lunch and for breakfast. He doesn't do this that much anymore and considering that I was a bit late i was grateful. (Yes I know tuna for breakfast is strange. It never happens much because I'm usually making my own lunch.) Now I sit down and I look at the sandwich. It looked pretty good. Two dense and fluffy pieces of bread and in between, you guessed it, tuna. Now I took a big bite, it was an innocent bite, one that would make all sandwiches smile. The first thing I felt was instant sickness. I wanted to throw up but my dad was still there so I did what any good daughter would do and finished the bite. The real fuck up was that I kept going. I had to but oh god I didn't want to. When I was done with that horror, my dad walked over to me and looked me in the eye and said: "Wasn't that delicious?" I looked at him slowly and said: "Sure was. **gag*** " When he left, I looked at the can. IT SAID 08/2014! I don't blame my dad because it was a good thing that he did, but I do wish he checked the date. | Woke up a little late, dad made me a tuna sandwich, took a bite, wanted to implode, finished sandwich out of kindness, expired after 08/2014. |
t3_dm6mn | self | Today T-Mobile gave me excellent customer service, and I wanted to share that with you... | I had been on a low cost plan that did not allow me to upgrade phones.
My contract was up, and I wanted to get a newer and better phone, but was having to pay full price. I called T-mobile, the lady on the other end offered to switch me to a higher paying plan I had been on previously, but one that would enable me to get the discounted upgrade.
Reluctantly, I accepted, and purchased my upgrade.
Right after that transaction, she casually noticed that the plan I was on might not be the best fit for me, and offered me the same plan I had just switched from.
Switched right back... Got my upgrade, kept my low cost plan... | T-Mobile customer rep fudged with my account to help me get a phone upgrade even though my plan didn't allow it. Put a big damn smile on my face.... |
t3_16vu3h | loseit | Big changes happening now | A little background: I am a 25/f who is finishing her final year of University to become a teacher. I recently broke up with a long term boyfriend who was constantly abusing me. I was often a larger female, but during our 8 year relationship I went from size 12-18 in female clothing. A lot of that has to do with maturity, leaving home, etc, but my goal is to get back to where I was.
I started going to the gym again this past week. On Monday I did 30 minutes on a recumbent bike and 15 on the elliptical. On Thursday I did 30 minutes on a recumbent bike and 20 on the elliptical; I also added some stretching after feeling calf soreness in heels the next day. Otherwise I haven't experienced much pain, though. I think that is likely due to the amount of walking I do/my occasional long distance bicycling in the summer.
I know I should drink more water and less/(eliminate?) diet coke. I know I need to eat more vegetables and proteins. In theory, these things all make sense, but I would be lying if I said I hadn't tried before and failed. I am not sure if that has to do with my refusal to purchase/use a scale until now.
Right now my weight is 239.8lb, height 5'9", I look like [this] [this] and [this] I feel in a rush to lose this weight so I can be more confident in the dating world (counselling is helping the abuse part, but it's not helping me like what I see when I take off my clothing). I have been noticing a heightened sex drive after leaving the relationship and it would be nice to act on it on occasion.
I wonder if there is anyone out there who could give me further advice about what workouts I should do (how often/what kind), how to reduce without binge eating, and how to continue to motivate myself through what is proving to be a very difficult year of my life (school, single life, etc).
Thank you for any help you can give. | looking to make some changes after a bad breakup, seeking advice how to accomplish my goals (skinnier, stronger, ASAP) |
t3_9zuqy | relationship_advice | So Relationship_Advice, do scars REALLY get girls? | I've been told mixed things regarding this subject. I've been through a few really bad places in my day and have some pretty gnarly stab wounds on my stomach and arms. I'm not concerned about those. I do, however, have a split scar between the eyebrows from a large ring on a knuckle and a scar that required eighteen stitches on my left temple. The question is, should I vitamin-E out the ones on my face?
I used split open vitamin E pills to get rid of one of the scars on one of my arms and it worked well. | Should I use vitamin E to get rid of the scars on my head? Or are the wonderful young ladies of the world magnetically attracted to them, as I've been lead to believe? |
t3_bfj6u | self | Apparently I'm unemployable. | *What follows is a lot of whining about how I can't find a job. You have been warned.*
I didn't think I was unemployable. I thought I was pretty smart, pretty capable, pretty easy to work with. I have a graduate degree and experience in a wide variety of medical and social disciplines. I see a job and think, "I could do that. Easy. Give me a week and I'll be an expert. No problemo."
Just got off the phone with my 4th or 5th interview (out of about 60 apps) in 3 months and, based on the woman's tone and demeanor, I'm pretty sure I won't be getting this job either. And it wasn't even a fucking job! It was a damn summer internship!
It seems that, on the off-chance I do get an interview, the cards are always stacked against me. I went to California for one interview and, of the 15 minutes I was given, the woman spent 10 of those minutes explaining how she has gotten SO many applicants who are more experienced than me. You can guess how that turned out. Other interviews, I can just tell by the way the person is talking that the decision has already been made. Sounds cynical, I know, but I don't think I'm wrong.
I moved in with my parents thinking it would take a month to find a job (I'm not that picky, after all), but it is coming up on three months and still nothing. I'm getting desperate. And depressed. I'm considering the military, but I don't even know if they would take me. Oh, and some of my massive students loans are already in repayment. I even check in with a temp agency from time to time, thinking maybe they'll have something to fill the void, but nothing (LITERALLY, nothing, one of them had one job for which you needed to be a mechanic. That was it.).
What should I do? I don't interview well, but that has never stopped me before - I've always made it clear I can do the job (even if I do so awkwardly and quietly). I can't stand this anymore, but I don't know what to do about it. Sigh... | Unemployed. Living with parents for WAY too long. Losing grip on sanity. Can't seem to do anything about it. |
t3_2bro9o | relationships | How important is it to maintain a good body image in a relationship. | So I m23 was speaking to my 22f gf of 5 months recently and we discussed what would happen and if we would end things if the other partner let themselves go so to speak.
We both work out and go to the gym several times a week, to put it bluntly she asked if I would break up with her if she got overweight, I said yes. We have a very honest relationship but this didn't phase her even though she disagreed.
Now I try my best to maintain a good body and try to improve it constantly, eat healthy etc. But one of the biggest reasons I do this is for my partner, so she's always sexually attracted to me, and get more turned on when we are with each other, have sex etc. I want her to look at me and say "yeah my boyfriend's hot" or "omg he has a great body"
Am I shallow to expect the same from her? | I try to maintain a good body for my partner by eating healthy and working out, is it shallow/ selfish to expect the same from her? |
t3_3pqh9q | dating_advice | What do you think of this advice? | 18M here. I was telling a friend of mine how I was having trouble picking up this girl I liked, and I mentioned how it's probably because I have no confidence or charm when it comes to girls I'm attracted to.
My friend then agreed by telling me that I'm a little awkward, which I honestly believe is putting it lightly. But then she said that it's just simply who I am, and that I should try to look for someone who likes me because I'm awkward and reserved.
I liked my friend's advice, and I thought it'd be really nice to find someone like that.
But the thing is, I keep seeing and hearing time and time again that girls only like confident guys, and to me it makes sense as well. I mean, I've seen it first hand. This girl I was having trouble picking up could hardly care less for a reserved person like me, but I see she's attracted to guys who are more charming and confident than I can ever be. And it seems like the constant advice I hear on how to get girls is be confident and have charisma, two traits I don't have.
I'm sorry if I'm implying that girls that like socially awkward and reserved guys don't exist, but for me, it's hard to believe that because of first-hand experience and the constant advice that you have to be charming and confident. But does anyone have their two cents on my thoughts and my friend's advice? | A friend told me I should find someone who likes me for my awkwardness, but experience and almost all the dating advice I have ever heard has said that that is impossible to do. |
t3_s2yl9 | dating_advice | Is this a yes? | Context -- I (M,19) had lunch with girl (F,19) twice. They went well. We talked nonstop. Also have drunk texted her twice (once saying that i think she's pretty and the other one is negligible) and have asked her out to a party once but she had a legitimate excuse...
==Today==
* Me: Lunch with you has been super-fun but I'd love to take you out to dinner sometime.
* Her: Umm I have a lot of things this weekend so I'll have to see but we'll figure something out. Sounds good.
* Me: What's the best way to contact you? cheesy smile
* Her: Just text me! | Girl knows I like her, is friendly with me, we've gotten lunch twice. Asked her out and she said we'll figure something out via text. |
t3_2mtle8 | relationships | Me [19 M] with my best friend [19 F] of over a year, are going out on Friday together. | Me and this girl, we met on the first day of College and hit it off immediately, the next few weeks were a very spotaneous, awesome relationship. Eventually she broke it off. We stayed close but she dated another guy so we weren't friends for a while. This summer we started toalking again, and she would come visit me (I stayed at school, she went home) and we'd hang out, and she developed feelings for me again while mine had redeveloped as well. She eventually broke up with her boyfriend but decided to keep things between us as friends. It was really hard on me... but eventually lost hope when she started liking another guy.
We stilll do everything together, and she is my best friend/closest confidant, and I'm hers, but this week, I jokingly mentioned that we could dress really fancy and go out since I got a new suit. She, surprisingly enough, agreed. (She had been avoiding hanging out on weekend nights for a while.) So now, I want to make this night really memorable! We're going to go for dessert and Hookah later... what else can I do? Or am I in over my head and should I let this one go? She still texts that other guy a lot... or am I too far in the friendzone at this point? | I love my Ex, I want to show her that I can be that guy in her life, should I do this? How can I do this? |
t3_434srk | personalfinance | 19 and trying to climb out of small debt | Hey all, finance is one of my weakest subjects so ive been reading books and lurking this forum for about 6 months now, learning as much as i can.
Heres my story:
Im 19 y/o living in NC , i was in college but due to unforseen financial problems im no longer attending. Im now $4,500 in debt (which is growing by about 150 per month). I just started working today and i am being paid $8 per hour for 12 weeks after that I'll be getting a full pay of $10 per hour. I have a car payment of $160 per month but i dont need to pay for insurance or gas untill May 1st.
My problem is i want to attend college in August but i cant send them my transcript untill the outstanding fees are paid off from my previous school. Im required to send in my transcript by july 15th at the latest to enroll in a new school. I am recieving no financial assistance from my parents in this matter (besides food and shelter which im thankful for). Also due to my working hours i have to have my car and other automobile expenses
Overall im having trouble figuring out exactly whay i can do to accomplish both task. Ive started a entrepreneurial consultation business with my sister (who has a degree in communication and business administration) that specializes in local businesses that lack online presence and marketing, and ive started a home bakery business and a niche blog in hopes of making a few bucks through ebooks and adsense. However i dont know the possible outcome of these endeavors.
Additional info: i have a job lined up with my uncle if i get into school. This will pay for my car ,possible loans ill have to start paying for (since im taking a semester off of school my grace period will run out) and living expenses. Im already applying for aid and scholarships as well. If anyone can help me out or point me in the right direction that would be much aapreicated as im starting to stress more and more each day.
Thanks in advance! | 4,500 in debt and growing, college wont release my transcript. Just got my first job but im not sure if itll pay for all my expenses in time so i can apply for another college before application deadline. |
t3_zmu2x | AskReddit | Something really weird happened to me as I was falling asleep a week ago. Paranormal, or sleep related? | Ok, so over the past few years I've had a few really weird things happen in my house. Just enough for me to count on both hands. No one in my family would say the house is haunted, but we've had weird things happen.
So about a week ago I was touched while falling asleep in bed. I was in that state of near sleep, when I feel something similar to a finger tip placed on the inside of my leg near my knee. I freeze, but the touch certainly wakes me up. Then I feel the finger tip slowly slide up my leg until it reached my inner thigh, 4 or 5 inches from my crotch. Suddenly it turns onto the nail, and jabs me very hard in the thigh. It felt like someone with a very long nail poking you as hard as they could in the leg. I jumped up and ran into the bathroom, turned the light on and waited. I checked my leg, and it was slightly red around the area I felt the jab. No visible mark, just a red rash.
Despite it being terrifying, I've been trying to keep a level head. I know that you can hallucinate as you're losing your frontal cortex and falling asleep. I myself have seen and heard things when I was young that were clearly these hallucination (ants in my bed, owls flying around my room) but I never knew if you could feel anything, or at least anything that distinct. And leave redness too? I've felt random nerves pinch before, but it wasn't like this.
So all of you psychologist redditors, is this normal sleep behavior, or should I start looking for a new house? | I was falling asleep when I felt a finger slide up my leg and jab me. Not sure if ghost or just hallucinating. |
t3_1yv62g | relationships | How do I [M 18] form relationships? | So I'm in my second semester at my university, but still having trouble making friends that I can hang out with on a consistent basis. It might seem like an excuse, but my room mate is an international student from Dubai, and while I have no problem with his culture or anything, I find it pretty hard to relate to him. In addition, the rest of my suite mates are all on track team, and while I do get along with them, and have gone out with them, I tend to feel really isolated from the people I'm living with. I have had the same best friend since preschool, so I've never really felt the need to make any new guy friends. Thus, I've never gone out of my way to become friends with other guys, so I guess some advice would be nice.
Secondly, I'm really having trouble with forming relationships with girls. I'm pretty inexperienced when comes to women, considering I haven't had a girlfriend since around the sixth grade.I don't find it hard to talk to girls, or carry on a conversation, I just find it hard to go from being on "hey whats up" basis, onto an actual relationship, whether it's a committed one or casual one.
With that being said, I think I've been breaking out of the cynical, apathetic shell that I lived in, in high school. In the last month I asked out one girl to hang out sometime, to which she said yes, but when I asked her out for Valentines day, she said maybe another time. Today I asked a girl for her number, she said she give it to me, but mentioned that she is in the middle of a relationship, at the moment. I'm starting to learn that rejection isn't that bad, which is nice. All in all, I'd like to know if it's better to ask a girl out fairly quickly after meeting them, or get to know them over a month or so, and then ask? I'm a virgin by the way. | Just want some help making guy friend's, when to ask a girl out after meeting them, and how to turn something into a relationship. |
t3_1kg3th | books | Struggles with Wheel of Time | I'm halfway through the 5th book in the Wheel of Time series and i'm beginning to lose hope. I love the world that RJ has created and desperately want to get on with the story but it's becoming increasingly difficult due to one well known thing that RJ does, writing men from mars and women from venus.
I don't need a lot of character depth in a book series and I really enjoy Rand/Perrin/Mat chapters because there is some plot in them despite the character's not being greatly intriguing.
What I can't stand, however, is the outrageous chapters from almost all of the female character's point of view so far. It seems to me every single chapter with Egwene/Nynaeve (especially)/Elayne is all about how men are "stubborn, foolish mules," (I know RJ's wife is his editor but they both really need a thesaurus) tugging of braids, manipulating "wool brained men," and double standards.
I know the male chapters aren't much better but they usually just mutter about how women are crazy and move on with the actual story.
I'm at the point where I just want to skip every Nynaeve chapter I come across as it focuses on just how angry and bossy she is every time, any plot that happens is better described in other point of views. | Women in WoT are all the same bossy character, is there any hope of the plot prevailing of their repeated tantrums or should I give up? |
t3_2l8497 | relationships | How do I (M/15) get a girl (F/14) to like me? | So I'm interested in this freshman, and I told my friend about it and he knows her, so he gave me her number. I've talked to her a few times now, and she seems to like talking to me, (she's even smiley faced me ;)).
My friend sent a pic of me when he gave me her number, but oddly I don't think she actually knows who I am. I haven't spoken to her in person cause I don't see her in school, but I've passed her and I try to smile at her and she doesn't notice me. So first problem is how do I get the girl to actually know who I am? What should I do?
I asked her what her favorite food is, and she told me white pizza, so I offered to take her to get some at a good place I know, and her response was "Idk I will need to see but maybe". Now I don't know what the hell maybe means, why would she not be able to ever get pizza? But whatever. | So how should I get this girl to #1 know who the fuck I am, and #2 go out with me? |
t3_23vbi8 | relationships | Me [25 M] with my Ex-GF [23 F] of 9-months. She is in the process of moving out. I'm leaving town. She has keys. First post ever and could use advice please | 1st post ever but I need some advice and I don't know where to turn soooo Reddit!
My girlfriend and I broke up two days ago and she's moving out. All of her stuff is by the front door. The problem is, I'm going on vacation this weekend and have had it booked for months. She was supposed to come but that's not happening now. We've broken up before (about 3 months ago) and last time she moved out, she had her work friends help her move and they trashed my place, ripped up the $250 comforter I bought for us, smashed candles, threw cat litter and poo everywhere, and stole a few of my things (Nothing too bad: A bottle of nice scotch, HDMI cable, picture frames).
She's not on the lease and hasn't paid the deposit (around $800) and has keys for the apartment. I'm leaving town tomorrow and don't know what to do.
I don't know if calling the police will do anything. I've never called them and don't want to drag them into it but I don't think she'll give me the keys for the 3 days I'm gone. Even if she can't get her stuff out, I just don't want her and her friends there while I'm gone as they could just trash my place and steal again. I just want this to be quick and painless for both parties. | Going back back to Cali Cali for the weekend and ex has keys but her stuff may not be moved out by time I leave and could trash my place or steal my shiz yo. Advice? |
t3_2mlrwc | relationships | I [21m] got a friend request by my future wife [18f] | This post is going to come off as crazy to a lot of people that don't understand my culture but try to follow along. I am an Indian American male and I come from a liberal family. When I was a young child, my grandfather and uncle were murdered. A family that lived nearby aided my family back in India during that time period.
They were able to get the police to guard our home, helped my grandmother rebuild the shop. Since then my family has been indebted to them. They have always been nice to us, however they have requested that when I am finished with my studies that I marry their daughter. From what my parents tell me, that I need to accept because if I don't they could ruin my family's life in India. They have the power to throw my family member's in jail, make them lose their job.
My parents told me about this when I went into highschool and at times I was frustrated by the whole thing, now I accept that this is my responsibility as the first born son. So, the situation here lies now is that the girl I am supposed to marry one day, has sent me a friend request. I have only met her twice, and once when I was a little kid.
So now the thing lies, is do I accept it? My fb has pictures of me out in bars, pictures of me with other women. From what I heard her parents don't even want her having a facebook. So I am pretty sure it's a secret account.
I know that when I do get married, I don't want to be fully traditional and not drink etc. So is it okay if my future wife see's that stuff? Is it better, to be fully honest with her? Also how do I handle if she wants to start a relationship now? | My family owes another family and as a result I am set to marry their first daughter. I recently got a friend request from my future wife, what do I do? |
t3_2rw0nj | AskDocs | Nausea when watching text scroll or POV videos | 22, male, 6'3", 170lbs, white, been going on a few months now, midwest USA... eyes?, no existing conditions, no medications...
Hey guys, thanks for reading.
In the past few months it seems I've noticed I start getting dizzy or nauseous when trying to focus on things that are close to my eyes and are scrolling.. but now it seems it doesn't need to be that close. I can be playing video games at home, 9 feet from my TV, and get nauseous when I drive too fast in-game.
Now I can also be at work scrolling through a PDF and I literally have to take a breather because it's so overwhelming... it's not even a full feeling of nausea but literally overwhelming. I feel like I'm going to puke most of the time when it's happening. For instance, the POV video on the front page right now of the Parkour people running from zombies? Can't watch it without feeling sick... my eyes feel all twitchy during and my brain feels like jello. It's gotten really irritating.
Do I have an inner ear problem? Not enough nutrition or something? Seems to be less noticeable when I eat but I just had lunch and it's still occurring for that video. | get dizzy, nauseous, or overwhelmed feeling when trying to focus/read scrolling text or fast paced POV videos. |
t3_3ihxta | legaladvice | [Pennsylvania] Parents using an old joint bank account to write bad checks. I'm 5 hours away. Is driving 10 hours to remove my name my only option?... | When I was 18, my dad had myself and my mom open a bank account together so he could feed money into it if I needed something during college. Most of the time it went unused, up until maybe my car needed inspected or something.
Well, lately, they've taken to using it to write bad checks. Like when my dad didn't want to pay for the repairs on his car so he wrote a check to get the car and then immediately called to cancel it. He also canceled a check I wrote for myself, that he owed me, for $1043. At this point, I just want the goddamn thing closed. Problem is, I am 5 hours away. The bank seems unconcerned. I am a bit more than furious. I have no online access, no checks to get the routing or account number off of, all I have is a card and I want off it immediately.
Is there really *no way* to remove my name unless I drive 5 hours? I wish I had thought of this beforehand but I really didn't see them intentionally trying to fuck up my life like this and I forgot the account even existed.
You may be wondering why my mom, the other name on the account, is okay with this. Quite frankly, she's a moron. | I need my name to be removed from an old bank account that my parents are now using to write bad checks. Am I seriously stuck on this account unless I make a 10 hour trip to cancel it? |
t3_1t2x2h | relationships | [22 M] came on too strong; do I still have a chance? | I went on a date with a girl that I've known for quite some time about 2-3 weeks ago. The date went really well, and I stayed at her place. We messed around but no sex. We've hung out 3-4 other times and I stayed at her place one other time, again no sex. She did tell me I was a really good kisser and she enjoyed being around me.
I fell into a trap of texting her too often and started to realize she was backing off. I quickly took the opportunity to ask her "am I coming on too strong or making you uncomfortable or anything?" to which she responded "just a little, but I don't feel uncomfortable. I like being around you and I think we connect really well, I'm just not looking for anything serious right now, especially after (ex) attacked me a month ago."
That text exchange occurred about 4 days ago, and I haven't sent her anything since. I do notice her liking photos of mine on social media sites even though we haven't been conversing over the last few days.
I need a couple pieces of advice: 1. do I still have a chance to make this work if I exhibit more patience; and 2. what should my course of action be from here? | Hitting it off really well with this girl, came on a little too strong and realized it. I have since backed off and am now wondering if I still have a chance and what I should do. |
t3_1zk1r7 | relationships | Me [20F] with my ex [21 M] 9months, He just broke up with me. I want him back but I don't know if I should stop trying. | The last months of our relationship consisted or arguing. We had a beautiful past. We were truly in love but arguing became something we would do since the year started.
He broke up with me through face time, and that really bothers me. The real person I know would have never done that. I miss the person I fell in love with, the "new him" is completely different.
He says I am to strict and that makes him unhappy. He asks for freedom but at the same time he says his feelings for me haven't changed and that he still loves me.
We are meeting up to discuss things, because I am very confused. One day it seems like he does want me back and then the other he is a complete unemotional person. My point is should I keep fighting to win him back, or should I just completely ignore my relationship and let go of him. HELP!!! | He broke up with me last Thursday, and I am trying to make the relationship work but he says he doesn't know what he wants. Should I keep trying or give up? |
t3_13q2wu | AskReddit | Did I do the right thing? | I just recently broke up with my girlfriend of 1 year. Last night we decided to still be friends, and had a nice long talk about things I could change. Well she tells me about a guy she has started to "date" and I ask his name and how old he is. This morning I decide to run a background check on this guy and turns out hes a convicted felon, for enticing children over the internet. This conviction was drop and he has a less "serious" injurying a child felon. I decide to tell her and she freaks, tells me this guy isnt the same guy. His name is very unique and in fact a guessed his middle name because of this court document. The age also adds up. Granted I dont have hard proof because he didnt have to sign up for the sex offenders thing, but I have a strong feeling its the guy. Shes also 18 and he was originally after her friend but her friend wouldnt have anything to do with him, so shes basicly his second choice. I care for this girl and dont want her to get hurt. So reddit, think I did the right thing by telling her? | Ex likes a possible pedofile, I tell her, she doesnt belive me. Did I do the right thing? |
t3_2pded6 | tifu | TIFU by making a lunch lady think I'm an immigrant. | First time posting in this sub. So this happened a few minutes ago, I'm an identical twin and I was sat with the clone in the college canteen waiting for the bus to take us home when a lunch/dinner lady who was replacing the bin liners came up to us and asked if we're twins (duh). Note: She doesn't know/understand English very well.
Her: Are you twins?
Me: Yes
Her: Are you from Saudi?
Me: No, Africa (My mothers Indian however my fathers half Tanzanian half Arab so to make things easy I just say I'm African since its more plausible as I have afroish hair)
Her: Ah, you come here to study?
Me: Yes
Her: I see you around college and yeah
Me: Yeah
Her: Are you going to university?
Me: Yes
Her: How long have you been here?
Me: I'm in my second year
Her: So you stay at your cousins? (This is where I thought huh I thought she asked my ethnicity and the situation was getting really awkward)
Me: Yes
Then she left and I realised I made her think I've come over to England to study and am staying at my cousins when in fact I was born in England and have stayed here my whole life... throughout the ordeal my twin was sat quiet in his phone -. | Made a lunch lady believe I've immigrated to study and stay at my cousins because of how awkward the situation was when in fact I've lived in England my whole life |
t3_ogiu0 | AskReddit | Reddit, I need help finding some information about professional writing/image in a corporate setting. Please help! | Without giving out too much information about where I work, I'm trying to get some information about professional writing/image in a corporate setting. I know the people of Reddit are very aware of grammar rules, sentence functionality, paragraph structure and the like.
A couple events have taken place at work in various emails, newsletters and announcements, that has revealed to me that there is a large issue at my place of employment in the "Professional Communication" department.
We deal externally with customers and internally with employees every single day. I am planning on coming up with a presentation to give to the president of the company. In this presentation, I would like hard data to show the importance of professional communication among other employees and even more so, with our customers.
I'm asking for help to gather this data. The issues we are having are elementary... commas in the wrong place, commas not in the right place, run-on sentences, spelling errors, etc. Anything you can do to help me compile this data would be most appreciated. | People at work can't type professionally and it's starting to bug me. Need information to help prove that this is something we really need to fix. |
t3_3oewve | relationships | I [17M] am in a complicated love triangle with 2 [~17F's] | So here's how it works.
Girl 1 (1 for short) knew me since middle school. She contacted me recently and things kind of shot off. Soon I realized, we were complete polar opposites, she thinks I don't speak much, but I simply don't speak much to her. She's an air head, and honestly only concerns herself with things like sex, relationships, flirting ect. She can't carry a conversation that I'd be interested in. No, she asked if I wanted to go on a date to see an astronomical phenomenon (won't say because that could trace the region I live in) she said it'd be a double date, saying I could invite a friend, and she'd invite a friend.
Turns out, I'm REALLY attracted to her friend. Her friend is everything I like in a girl +some. I messaged the friend (2 for short) so I could get in contact with 1. I did this because I decided to give a date a shot with 1, and see where it went. Me simply asking 2 if she could contact 1 for me, turned into a full blown conversation with 2. What was a physical attraction before, became even more. 2 doesn't know 1 wants romantic involvement with me, that I know of. My question is, how could I work this so that it ends with me involved with 2. I can't just drop 1 for her friend because I'm in a little too deep with her. | girl 1 really likes me, feeling isn't mutual. I am much more interested in girl ones friend, who's feeling towards me are neutral. |
t3_32lt82 | relationships | My [22F] boyfriend [25M] of 6 months asked me to move in with him. | I've never posted here but here goes nothing. I've been dating my boyfriend for a couple months now, and I mentioned a few weekends ago that I could imagine us living together someday and asked if he could do the same, and he said yes. The other day he asked me to move into his apartment with him in September.
He has been in far more serious relationships than I. My longest was in college and lasted just barely over a year, and his was off-and-on for a total of 4 years, and they had an apartment together for a while before it ended.
I'm nervous because I feel like for him this will be a nice step forward in our relationship, but for me this is like, several huge leaps forward in my life. I'll be moving far enough away from my family that I can't see them every week like I usually do (we're a small family and really close), I'll be living on my own for the first time outside of college dorm life, I'll have to get a new job, and I'll be living with an SO for the first time.
The move isn't happening until this fall, and by then we'll have been dating for about a year. I know that when the time comes I'll be more comfortable with the idea and I have plenty of time to prepare, but right now all of these changes seem really overwhelming, and I'm scared that moving in together will hurt our relationship. Does anyone have any advice on how to keep things in perspective and prepare for these life changes? | Moving in with my boyfriend in a few months, everything will be new and I'm a scaredy-pants. Advice? |
t3_1lzpjm | tifu | TIFU: talking to a girl | Little bit of background: Winter 2013 college semester i started to fall for this girl that i meet through a mutual friend. fast forward to a week after school gets out, she goes home for the summer and i start working third shift, gotta make the money, so she breaks up with me. a week later she starts going out with her friend from back home who she "wanted to go out before but didn't want to get into a LD relationship, but its cool now because this year he will be going to a local community college that is near the college we go to."
OK, now back to today, yesterday ex-gf wants to hang out for a bit as we are going to try to just be friends as there wasn't much relationship before we broke up. So i hang out with her and the old feelings resurface in me, time to GTFO and have some whiskey.
so today i went to football tailgating at the college i go to, hot greek little sister walks up with her friend "hey bigwag91, this is my friend hotgurl, blah blah blah, she just got out of a two year relationship. she is just looking to hang out. had i not been thinking about last night (or maybe the hangover of today) i would have seen this as a total green light on hotgurl. later hotgurl is talking to me alot giving little hints that i should have noticed but i couldn't muster myself together enough to take these hints and lay some moves on hotgurl.
Later on i ended up having to go up to here and apologize for acting like a complete idiot in front of her and we got to talking. ex lovers, friends, interests, etc, etc. the ex lovers part was the worst cause after talking for 45-60 minutes she looks and me and goes "you will find someone, don't worry" but gives major hints that i missed my chance. | Ex-gf used me as a place holder, shit on my heart, hung out with me yesterday, and stuck in my head today when i could have done something with hotgurl. |
t3_15684q | relationships | [25]M - Girlfriend [25]F - wants me to go to bed at the same time she does. I wake up later, because I have to work later than she does (9-6). She gets upset when I don't go to bed at the same time. | [25]M - Girlfriend [25]F - wants me to go to bed at the same time she does. I wake up later, because I have to work later than she does (9-6). She gets upset when I don't go to bed at the same time.
Been with her for 8 years now. She works from 6:30 AM - 3:30 PM. I work 9 AM - 6 PM. So I get up later, go to work later, and in general am up later. Have explained this to her multiple times, that I'm just not tired, so I can't go to bed at that time, but she doesn't seem to care. It's not even about the "hanky panky" - most of the time we just cuddle and fall asleep if I do go to bed at the same time. | Girlfriend wants me to go to bed at same time. Our schedules are very different, sometimes just not tired. When this happens, it makes her quite angry / irritated. Seems completely irrational. |
t3_2td6dw | relationships | Me [16M] and my gf [16/F] have been dating for 4 months, and she has anxiety about me leaving. | I'm 16 and this is my first serious relationship, it's had it's ups and downs but for the most part I've really been enjoying myself. My gf has pretty bad anxiety. It's so bad at times she'll stay up for days when she's stressed about school. (9 days was the longest) She also has low self esteem
We were texting each other and she's in one of those periods due to exams. Bad mood swings and crazy stress, so she just dropped and bomb on me saying and I quote.
"All I keep thinking about is how disappointed you must be and how much you regret asking me out. You probably feel trapped in this relationship you don't want to be in and you won't leave because you think i'll do something like hurt myself. So you just stay."
I then asked how long she'd been thinking these things and she said for the entire duration of our relationship. Extremely upsetting because she's the most wonderful girl I've ever met. I told her that I'm not going to leave and I want to talk about it tomorrow in person, she said "I don't think I'll ever believe that" and "he'll leave and I'll be alone again." keeps replaying in her head.
I'm not going to leave her, but it's scary because it must be torture for her. So I'm wondering if I can do anything, or say something or maybe some advice for her, or me from someone who's been in this situation.
She's never told me this stuff before so I see it as a cry for help, that or she's going to break up with me because of how she feels I dunno.. | My girlfriend is scared I'll leave her and she can't stop thinking about it. I'm going to talk with her tomorrow and I'm asking for any advice on what I could say or do |
t3_futca | relationships | Should I follow him? | We are both in our early 20s, been dating over a year. We currently live together, and are very happy. He got a great job in a city 12 hrs away for after he finishes his master's degree. I will be finishing my master's degree around the same time.
Basically, we have talked about the possibility of me following him after we graduate. He has said on several occasions that he is happy with me, and wants me to come with him when he moves. The problem is, I can't find a job in the same city. He has said that he doesn't mind supporting me for a while until I can find a job, but I'm a pretty stubborn and independent female. His job will be paying him more money than I can every fathom making, so his supporting me would not financially be an issue.
I have always wanted to be a housewife--cook, clean, raise kids, etc., and obviously would rely on my husband's income in order to do this. For some reason though, the idea of my boyfriend supporting me makes me queasy. He knows I'm not lazy or with him for his money. He also knows that I would make sure our home was spotless and dinner was ready when he got home and laundry would always be done. I can't shake this feeling that I need to contribute more.
Is this different than being married and being a housewife? I would still be looking for a job in the mean time. Why do I feel differently about this than I would if we were married? Why doesn't it seem to bother him? Am I just being irrational? Why am I so scared? Should I follow him? I love him, and I don't want to lose him. | SO got great job in another city, but I'm afraid to follow him because I don't have a job there. |
t3_3k251i | relationships | I'm [34 F] not sure if I should go to the wedding of my best friend [29 M] | Before a recent meet up, my best friend informed me that my significant other and I were invited to his wedding. Things were fine until the meet up where things were mostly OK aside from one embarrassing incident that wasn't remotely funny for anyone. I texted the next day and explained things and everything was going great and smoothed over until I mentioned that I don't think his fiancé likes me or my significant other.
To be clear, I had tried to communicate with her over the course of a year, but never received encouraging or interested replies, merely polite ones. When I mentioned wanting to get a gift for their wedding while still hanging out, her body language was one of "uhh these guys are coming to our wedding?" It's been a few weeks since he's messaged me and generally we text back and forth every day, nothing of a romantic nature ever, just fun chit chatting about sports and other things.
I've sent a few messages explaining that I don't want to go to the wedding and ruin it if she doesn't want myself or my significant other there. I've yet to receive a reply or acknowledgement.
I understand that weddings are extremely stressful, so with all that, should I still go to the wedding? This is something I'd really love to be witness to, but at the same time I don't want to be "that person," as it were. | Best friend invited me to wedding informally, but fiance may or may not have a problem with me or my SO. Should I still attend the wedding at this point? |
t3_1zn0l1 | relationships | [M21] Getting back in the dating game | Broke up with my ex-gf of two years a few months back, and I'm finally starting to think about dating again. Problem is, I suck at pursuing anything because I over-think how any given girl is feeling and convince myself to not be that pushy guy who just ends up making her feel uncomfortable.
Basically, I start talking to a girl, get contact information, and then completely flake out, because I don't want to always initiate contact. I understand that there's an element of a chase here, but I cut it off pretty soon because I don't want to be pushy. I wouldn't classify myself as a creep at all. I'm pretty charming and can hold conversation with girls easily, but I guess I'm still too much of a "nice guy"? I don't know.
Example: Messaged a girl on facebook about going to a concert who I had struck up a friendship with a few weeks before. Meet up at concert with friends, have a good time, she asks for my phone # to invite me to other shows, I ask for hers a few days later, and she takes a while to message it to me. She's always been super-friendly and has laughed at my jokes and stuff, and I've caught her looking at me a few times. However, she hasn't invited me to anything else. Should I keep asking or call it off? | Should I just keep acting interested until a negative sign presents itself, or do what I have been doing, which is stop when there aren't as many positive signs happening? |
t3_2rmej9 | relationships | My Long-Distance Girlfriend [19 F] just broke up with me [19 M], is it cruel for me to try my hardest to get her back? | For the past 7 months, my girlfriend of 18 months and I entered a long distance relationship due to her parents and her moving to the other side of Australia from where I live. Its about a 2 hour flight.
About 5 days ago, she broke up with me just due to the distance alone. We never had any fights (our biggest dispute was over me saying I wanted a red panda as a pet..) and our hobbies, interests, morals and thought processes were the same. She was literally my second half and I considered as well as many others that me and this girl were perfect for each other.
When she broke up with me she told me that "the only issue is the distance" and that "it hurts" her when I am not around.
We are both about to start university at different universities and I know that this will be a great opportunity for us to both grow as individuals and gain some new experiences, but I do not want to lose this girl.
I love this girl to death and i cant imagine myself with any other girl, nor do I want any other. I want to marry this girl one day. She's perfect for me. But is it cruel for me to try and win her back and keep the long distance if its hurting her?
People say if you love someone that you should let them go, while others say that if you truly love someone you should fight for them no matter what. I don't know which motto to follow.. | My Gf which i love deeply broke up with me due to long distance alone and because not having me near "hurt" her. Is it cruel to fight to keep her? |
t3_39c5xa | relationships | Me [23MA] with my girlfriend [24 F] of four months, emotionally cheated. First, and last time, of backstabbing any human being like that again. | Plain and simple, I emotionally cheated on my ex. She went on my phone, and saw a text message of me stating "i want you" and "unhappy." She broke up with me, and I don't blame her, however, I have accepted what I did.
She has very bad trust issues, has dated a few people in the past who have taken advantage of her emotionally, and physically. So i don't blame her for her no tolerance policy. However, she continues to talk to me, we hung out the other night and it was emotional, with some physical things involved.
I am deciding to go no contact, the dumpee at this point. She wants me in her life as a friend, and her no tolerance policy turned into a "i would not say the word never regarding us getting back together."
A lot of you redditers are
"once a cheater always a cheater believers." Hey, I get it, it's something that is very serious, hurtful, betraying, and ruins ones self respect, self worth, and general well being.
But I am extremely sorry for what I did, have not forgiven myself, I was always the victim and now I am the villain. That is scary to me, considering I am always there for others, am very humble, and respectful.
But sadly, to my ex girlfriend, I did something innappropriate, destructive, and toxic. I just want you all to know, that the very few people who do make their first cheating mistake, whether physical or emotional, change and will never EVER make that dispecable move again.
Whether she gets back with me or not, and there is a slight possibility of that happening, I am hopeful and optimistic. I have learned from this big time. Thankfully, I have people in my life who can help guide me in the right direction, and provide constructive criticism on my actions. | I royally screwed up, and will learn from my mistake the hard way. Sometimes, the only way to learn is the hard way. |
t3_3fk8g4 | relationships | Me (25F) trying to learn the boundaries of dealing with ex partners as well as form an understanding of how to be single now after so long. | What are the guidelines for dealing with exes? Should you use one for...'needs'? How does one even begin?
It's been years since I have been single and everyone moves so differently.
Part of me wants to just cuddle. Part of me just wants company. Part of me just wants to have my brains fucked hard. One problem is that I have only been intimate with a person I have dated or built something with. I'm pretty awkward in person, or so I have come to find out.
I just need to know how to deal with recent singlehood and how to also fulfill these things.
My personality type is one that isn't necessarily dependent on another's, more so just has urges to indulge more into being with someone. Halp plz | I am trying to figure out how to function as a single person and still get my rocks off and enjoy others without it being weird. |
t3_xe6q2 | AskReddit | I was poisoned by vegans. Reddit, what's your worst vacation story? | Several years ago, a few drinking buddies and I were driving to Virginia on vacation. After driving for nearly 16 hours, we stopped for dinner in Baltimore. I forget the name of the place, but it was this little cafe in the middle of town. We were too tired, and stupid, to realize it at the time, but the place was a vegan restaurant. So being the incredible dumbasses that we were, we decided to not read the menu and just order quick cheeseburgers so we can get back to driving.
The burgers came out and we ate them, totally oblivious to every vegan poster, painting and individual around us. We pay for our meal and get back on the road, ready to get to our destination by morning. About an hour later, we all started to feel rumblies in our tummies. What happened next will haunt me for the rest of my life.
Simultaneously, the four of us get violently ill, the special kind of sick reserved for food poisoning. Somehow, and to this day I thank him for it, my friend got us off onto the shoulder of the road. For the next half hour, anyone on 95 could see four rednecks losing their non-vegan, vegan prepared meals in the most horrible way possible. It was so bad that even after we were done, none of us could even look at anything besides water for the rest of the trip. | Four rednecks mistake a vegan restaurant for a burger joint, get food poisoning by said restaurant, make an ass of themselves on interstate* |
t3_53qnpm | legaladvice | [GA/FL] Mom's joint bank account seized | Posting for my mom, I can get more info where needed.
Mom lives in Georgia, brother lives in Florida.
Long story short my mom has a joint bank account with my brother. He hasn't had access to it or has been active on it for over eight years and my mom has used it and not gotten a new account for simplicities sake.
My brother is being sued for student loans not being payed. Mom finds out Saturday her account has been frozen and she can't access funds, she has no idea why, calls bank and they inform her an attorney out of Miami has frozen her account and that's all the info she has gotten. Come Monday she contacts the attorney telling how my brother isn't on the account at all, attorney's secretary States of she provides pay stubs and can account for money in the account then it should be enough for the account to be unfrozen. Secretary also states they shouldn't have even been able to freeze it since my mom gets paid by the state of Georgia.
Attorney calls after his lunch break and pretty much asks my mom why brothers name is still on account and she explains, and says again he hasn't used it in 8 years. He says tough luck and didn't care even after my mom said she was never served papers from them saying they'll go after wages in the account. Still he didn't care, mom yells at him and he hangs up.
Today my mom found out they took $900 of the frozen $1000 she had, and the remaining $100 is still frozen. Still she was never served papers and never given information at all to fight in court.
Within 3 days her account was frozen and wages garnished without any notification. She owes fees to multiple places now due to payments and checks bouncing.
Is she screwed or was the attorney in the wrong, where did she go from here. She has no access to what little money she has to get an attorney, she tried a few free consultation places but told her she needed a civil case lawyer. Bank is working on getting her the case info but they said it takes multiple days to get documents.
Please any help appreciated | mom screwed out of $1000 in her joint bank account that the other party never used, she was never served papers or given a chance to defend herself. What can she do? |
t3_4vp5vo | relationships | Me [19F] with my friend [19F], feeling smothered | Hi everyone, so I'm friends with this girl, I've known her since I was 11 but we've only just started speaking properly now. She's a really nice girl and I love texting her. I met up with her on the weekend and it was great but social situations exhaust me, considering I have Asperger's and some social anxiety. So I prefer to text my friends. However, this girl is the complete opposite of me, she texts me and asks me to meet up with her which I don't have a problem with but I don't have a job as I'm a full time student and can't get the bus and my parents are too busy to take me to places and pick me up etc. I tried explaining this to her but she just told me ''it would be good for you to gain some independence'' and ''you're a grownup lol''. While I agree to some extent, I don't think I should have to explain why I can't come out. Another thing is that I like to go out on the weekends but during the week I like to stay in. I don't want to tell her I don't want to go out with her because it's not that I dislike her, I just find social situations exhausting. I'm scared she might blow up on me as well as I've had friends do this in the past. I feel like I'm being irrational and blowing it out of proportion but I don't really know how to handle it. Thanks for reading :) | How to explain that you can't/don't want to go out without hurting someone's feelings or making them angry? |
t3_3o6qsw | relationships | My [25M] boyfriend and I [25F] would like to go on a trip, however my family doesn't know about my relationship. | So my boyfriend and I started dating early in highschool, we dated for a few years and ended up breaking up after he felt frustrated about the way my family treated him and the way they refused for us to hang out. I have always been terrified of my dad and when it came to asking him for anything I would rather do anything but that.
I come from a typical Mexican background and my dad will get so angry about the littlest things, that I'll break down and cry which makes our relationship a bit complicated. About a year ago my boyfriend and I decided to try it out again, we felt the same about each other and hadn't dated anyone else in that time, kept in contact, flirted and pretty much kept up our friendship online. We once again started hanging out, but without my family's knowledge.
I've told him for months that I would come out and tell them about him but I've never had the courage. I hope to one day marry him and move out, but I'm just so afraid of what might happen. I have a full time job, and I'm near finishing school, I know I would be fine if I was kicked out today. Yet I do love my parents and I would be unable be happy knowing they hated me in any way. So how can I bring this up, and tell them? I understand that I'm an adult and should just do it but really I've never been treated like an adult by them, so what should I do? I just want to hang out in the open and not worry about my parents trying to hide him like he's some big secret when the rest of the world doesn't give a damn.
I hope it makes some sense, I tried to explain the best I could. | Dating an amazing and patient guy but I haven't told my family about him again, afraid of losing my family's love and would like some advice on being an adult. |
t3_2qqj0s | relationships | My [19M] mother[late 60's F] won't stop belittling the women I date. | So I figured I would come to reddit to try to get help on what to say to my mother about this issue she keeps having. With multiple girls I date and whom she meets very early on, she always seems to really love having them around, but will quickly point out all their flaws afterwards. For example, my current girlfriend, lets call her Ann. Ann was raised in a home where it's constantly a mess, so Ann isn't used to how tidy we keep things here. Just today, my mother, while Ann is in my room, starts getting pissed off because she left her new coat unhung. Another example is just the other day I had gone to walk our dog while Ann had decided to stay in because of the weather and my mother called her lazy to me Now, Ann has done everything to be nice to my family, shes very personable and will talk to my parents and help make dinner or whatever needs to be done. I feel it's unjustified for my mother to be so disrespectful because Ann isn't used to how we do things around here as opposed to her own home. I suppose what I'm looking for is a respectful way to try to help my mother understand that she is not only being disrespectful to the people I love, but is also hurting me by saying these rude statements about them. | My mother is disrespectful and gossips about my girlfriend to me. I am looking to talk to my mother about how she is not only hurting me but being disrespectful as well to the girl i love. |
t3_zlvnt | AskReddit | Had a pretty crazy drunk encounter last night. What's the craziest most unexpected thing to happen to you while intoxicated? | A couple friends and I went to a pizza place called Pizan's to get some food after a friends 21st birthday party. I had a little too much to drink so I asked my friends to pick up my food for me while I sat out by the car in case I decided to throw up. About half and hour later, iv'e thrown up and passed out in the car. My friends come out of the store and say they're accusing them of trying to steal food so I have to walk in and try to straighten things out. Simple, right? As soon as I walk in, the manager?(not sure) starts yelling at me about trying to get free food and sending people to do my dirty work and I can tell this guys drunk as well. I didn't have my receipt, but somehow in my drunken haze I pull out my phone and show him my recent purchases with my bank card. Pizan's, right at the top. This is all happening while the manager is threatening to knock me out and the crowd of people in the store are surrounding us and recording everything with their phones yelling "HIT HIM! WORLD STAR, WORLD STAR HIPHOP!" (he was about 3 times my size). I'm assuming the guy realized he was wrong and being an asshole so he ended up giving me a case of beer on the house. | Got drunk, tried to get food, drunk manager threaten to hit me for trying to steal food, he finds out he was wrong, i get free beer. |
t3_nsiua | AskReddit | Maintenance workers keep coming into my apartment while I'm sleeping. Should I be upset? | The first incident occured shortly after I moved in (Dec 7th) to my new apartment. I was notified that maintenace workers would be here Dec 14 between 9 and 4 to replace the furnace filter. We were also told that the maintenace workers would knock first and then call upon entering the apartment. My fiance and I were still in bed when one of the maintenace workers came into our apartment and replace the filter. Neither one of us heard a knock and we both checked our cell phones, no missed calls.
I brought this up to the people at the rental office and we basically brushed it off to "let's not let it happen again". While I was at the rental office however I asked if I could set an apointment for maintenace to come check out a dead electrical outlet in our living room. I asked the woman who was typing the information into the computer to tell maintenance to CALL FIRST. And not to just walk right in. So today I wake up (12:30PM) and found a paper lying on my couch in my living room stating that the outlet had been fixed, which means maintenace walked into my apartment again without my permission. So reddit, should I be upset about it? | maintenace workers at my apartment complex keep walking into my apartment without my permission, not sure if I should be upset |
t3_3103ua | relationships | Me [18 M] with my Girlfriend [17 F] dumped after 3 weeks | Sorry if this seems petty but it's really made me lose hope for my future. This was my first ever girlfriend and we were flirting and stuff about a month before we started going out. At the start it felt great, she would tell me how I'm one of the best looking guys she'd ever seen and just made me feel great, but after I asked her out she started becoming more and more distant until eventually she broke up with me, apparently because I'm too good for her and she doesn't want to be in a relationship right now, which obviously isn't the real reason.
So I guess I'm wondering is this a usual thing that happens, or am I really that shit of a person I can't keep a girl for more than 3 weeks even when I'm trying my very hardest to make the relationship work? It feels like she lost interest so ridiculously quickly and I don't understand why. | Got my first girlfriend after flirting for about a month, she lost interest and dumped me within 3 weeks of going out. Is this a usual thing to happen, or is it my fault? |
t3_1nm4fm | relationships | How to overcome a language barrier? | I [28/m] am really interested in taking this girl [?/f] out from work (to clarify, we don't work for the same company, sites closing in about a month so won't even see her again after that.) but her first language is Spanish and her English is pretty rough.
I've been trying to talk to her and flirt with her when I get the chance, but I think a lot of it is going over her head. Still, I feel like I can't get the point across that I'm flirting with her. She smiles, but...yeah.
Yes I realize I could ask her out in Spanish, but is that really cheesy to butcher someones mother tongue to try and get a date?
Any ideas here? | Me English, her Spanish, not sure she's understanding everything I say, need ideas to get a date out of her. |
t3_44crsh | tifu | TIFU by sending a text. | Backstory - Was with a "lady" for many years. Produced offspring. No longer with said "lady". She cray cray.
Today was going to be the day. Things have been gradually escalating between myself and my ex about kids/custody/schools/etc... I decided to hire a lawyer, (which she has threatened many times). We wrote up a nice long custody agreement. All the bells and whistles. Every topic was laid out. In my favor of course.
Today is the day she is receiving the documents in all their glory. I said she cray cray, so I had all my ducks in a line today. Everything was to be sent to her as soon as I left work. I was going to grab the offspring from the babysitter. I was going to get my ass out of town for the weekend and lay low with family for the weekend while everything calms down.
I am at work and think "shit". I need to tell the babysitter just in case my timing is off and Ms Cray Cray blows up and grabs the kids before me. Start writing my text giving the babysitter a heads up and if she picks up the kids, just let her, and I will handle the situation later so the kids don't see a big cluster fuck happening in front of them.
Send a text.
Get a call from Ms Cray Cray
"Hey, I don't think you sent this to the right person"
Fuck!
Sent it to Ms Cray Cray.
Now I am getting the kids, and myself, the hell out of this city. | sent my ex a text by accident saying she was getting served custody papers before I intended on her receiving them. Time to run and hide. |
t3_34y44p | relationships | I (18M) confessed to my (ex) SO (17M) about a big lie i told her for six months and I'm unsure what to do. | Hey there,
Some relevant background first: I'm 18, she's 17, we went out for approximately a year and a half before the incident. Also relevant, she has trust issues from her original dad who did nothing all day while her mom worked two jobs and kept the whole thing going. She then married a very awesome guy. :)
What incident, you may ask yourself: I left our city to go study abroad (but not too far, came back every weekend). Fast forward 6 months, i haven't gone to a single class, attended any exam or left my place more than a few times. Why? I honestly don't know.
Anyway, the actual incident here is that when I was asked about that by people I know, her included, I cooked up an elaborate lie about my life there (I suppose I didn't want to worry them and I thought i would get back on track in no time). For six months.
I recently confessed to most people I told this lie to about three weeks back ( I felt really guilty, for a good reason) and ever since, things have been quite the mess. The messiest part of said mess is that she broke up with me.
Well, broke up is a bit of a funny word in that case. She got very emotional and tearful as I told her that and told me later over text that we should stay friends, for at least a year.
So the issue for me here is, I don't really know what to make of that. I love this girl. I feel like the lowest of the low for hurting her that way but what now? Things are incredibly unclear as of right now and I have no idea what to do in regards to the relationship.
Thank youf or your time :) Feel free to ask if you feel you need more details, good day! | Lied to SO for six months, confessed, she broke with me in a peculiar way (we should stay friends for at least a year). No idea what the best thing is to do. halp |
t3_2b1y72 | relationships | [24M] A casual friend [21F] from class, sudden cold shoulder, no discernible reason... ? | A friend of mine from a class I had over Spring semester suddenly stopped talking to me. Our friendship wasn't terribly complex and I have a girlfriend so it was entirely platonic. Texted casually maybe a few times every couple of weeks, basically trading short bursts of banter about the class or in general. Anyway, pretty much after the semester ended, she has stopped returning texts (which have pretty much just been "hello" or "how's your summer?"). As usual they are infrequent, but still, usually I'd get a response within a couple of days. Now, nothing. She also unfollowed me on instagram.
The thing about me is that although I can't say this happens to me often (or ever, honestly), it's tough for me to let something like this go because I can't get my head around why the change of tune. We never fought, I was never a dick (that I know of). Things were cool.
So my question is basically this -- do people sometimes just... do this? | Casual friend suddenly stopped talking to me, unfollowed me on instagram. Not sure why. Does this kind of thing happen? |
t3_1rhj98 | relationships | I [30M] just started a trial separation with my wife [26F]. I could really use some advice or insight from others redditors with kids who have separated/divorced | A little background: my wife and I were together for 7 years and married for 5. We have a 3 year old together. Today will be the first day that my wife will be living apart from the both of us as part of a trial separation we both agreed to.
We've tried counseling but my wife was adamant that a trial separation would be best. Her reasons? At this point in time we are better friends than we are partners. She claims that she's felt unhappy from around the third trimester of her pregnancy (she was a higher-risk pregnancy so intimacy was really limited.) Long story short, our physical contact/intimacy died off early on and then the resentment set in.
So today is the first day that she's finally moved out of the house. I will be looking after our daughter because I have a stable work schedule over my wife, who usually works either overnights or from 2PM to 11PM.
What's really been a mind fuck with me these past couple of weeks is that I've been on a roller coaster of emotions. Some days I feel chipper/happy/on top of the world. Other days I am overcome with dread at the thought that I will no longer have my wife to take our daughter off my hands when she becomes too overwhelming for me. And still other days I can't help but think how this separation/divorce will affect our daughter. See, the both of us come from families that have divorced and so we've never really had both parental figures in our lives.
So what this all boils down to is: is this mind fuck that I'm going through normal?
We've also set some ground rules for this separation and we've agreed that we are allowed to see other people. I'd be lying if I said that I don't get giddy at the thought of dating again but I fear that anyone I date may end up being a rebound girl and that I should maybe take some time off. | My wife and I separated today and I've been on a motherfuckin roller coaster of emotions. Is this normal? Also, would redditors recommend for or against seeing other people at this time? |
t3_38j85u | relationships | I [F26] want to forgive an ex [M27] and let go of the anger but I'm having trouble. | Last year in the late summer/fall I briefly dated someone who ended up being a bad guy. The whole thing involved several ex girlfriends of his, one of whom was my professor at the time which caused a lot of issues, as well as a lot of lying and potential cheating (I can't confirm this but I have good reason to believe it happened). He broke up with me for an ex and then continued to try and be my friend after even though I continued to tell him I wanted to date. Currently, we have zero contact which I requested of him (it took several requests for him to actually stop contacting me) and I have blocked him on all social media and his phone number. I am in no way mean towards him. I usually just pretend he isn't there when I see him. Occasionally I will return a wave hello.
The reason I want to forgive and move on is because we have a lot of mutual friends and work in the same industry and I don't want this mistake I made/his decisions to affect my life. I see him at work and all I want to do is ignore him, which I do, but honestly it's exhausting. I just hate having that weight on me.
I'm hesitant to forgive and move on because I don't think he deserves forgiveness. He has expressed remorse, but I don't think he truly feels it. From my experience as well as other people's I realize this is not a one time occurrence, but a pattern. He is borderline sociopathic, amoral at best. So my forgiveness could mean nothing or could reinforce his actions as ok, which they are not.
I suppose this whole thing will happen in my head and won't really affect him (I'm not going to sit him down and tell him all this).
I guess my question is, has anyone else had a similar experience? How do you forgive someone who has wronged you and still feel empowered? | I want to forgive an ex for my own peace of mind but I feel torn as to whether or not he deserves forgiveness. How can I make peace with this without feeling I've given him approval of his actions? |
t3_f2483 | relationships | should I be (more) proactive about sexing up this boy? | Reddit, this is a throwaway because I feel pretty lame for asking this and sharing the circumstances. I'm 23, female. There's an extremely hot boy who I've hooked up with maybe 4 or 5 times since June. We don't really know each other, just have kept bumping into each other at bars and clubs, ended up at his place for awesome sexy one night stands.
Anyway, I think it's pretty much assumed from both sides that we're both very promiscuous/non-relationship people. Usually, it's been I'll spot him, pop up, say hi/flirt and then ask if he'll take me home. If he's with someone, I just wander off, if he's alone, we go have a good time.
** he has not shown any interest in me --he still hasn't asked for my phone number yet, has never asked me to go home with him, I'm the one always hitting on him**
-we are facebook friends though. Yes, I added him back in the summer, I'm lame.
but, he's lots of fun and great in bed. It's a nice treat once in a while. Thing is, he took me home for NYE, and in the morning new year's asked me to stay and hang out. I was shocked that he was wanting my sober company, so we stayed in bed all day till 7pm watching hockey/talking about art. Again, no asking my phone number, but he was extremely nice and ignored all calls he got on his cell.
Anyway, so my question is, I want to sleep with him/spend more time with him ASAP (I've just gotten back from a vacation). Can I/should I message him on facebook to see if we can hook up this weekend rather than me hoping to meet him by chance? Or is that completely desperate and pathetic seeing as he's made it pretty obvious that he's not interested in me? I want to make it clear that it'd be NSA sex since I'm moving to a different country next month. | is it lame (can I) if I ask to hook up with the hot guy I've had a few sporadic one night stands with, even if I know he's not particularly interested in me? |
t3_1vy89b | relationships | Me [24 m] with the girl I'm dating [24F] for about a month, wants to remain monogamous sexually but still date other guys | So I started dating this girl (we are both 24) I've known for 3 months about a month ago and we started having sex pretty quickly and things escalated fast. she just got out of a 3+ year relationship and her ex only moved out 9 weeks ago.
Everything was going nicely I suppose until the inevitable happened. now we never stated exclusively and she said she's happy to be single and focus on her self. a week or two ago she asked me to tell her if I start having sex w other girls and she will do the same.
Last night she was showing me something on her phone and some dudes call comes in and I pass the phone back to her. This guy she literally told me about the night before, said she went on a couple dates with him around the time we started dating. Now I know I shouldn't be bothered by this as I knew from the get-go that she should probably be dating loosely instead of getting into another relationship(with me). it still hurts.
I brought it up to her last night on the drive home and told her that where we are right now, I Don't want her talking to other guys and if that's what, she needs maybe her and I should stop seeing each other(ULTIMATUM!) before more feelings get involved. Later, I called her and told her that I was out of place to say that, as it is wrong for me to pin her down so early out of a serious relationship and it won't do anybody any good in the long run. she thanked me for being so open and honest w her and we got off the phone.
Has anyone been in this type of situation? I'm not looking to date a bunch of girls right now. I am focused on my career. how do I deal? | in rebound, dating girl out of serious relationship - she wants to continue dating, i want to be okay with that, i also want her to myself(eventually). |
t3_4m9ik5 | legaladvice | Do I have any recourse for this denied insurance claim? | I am in NJ and my insurance is Aetna. In December 2015 my doctor asked me to get an echo cardiogram. I made the appointment and had the service done on 12/30/15. When I called my doctors office to get the referral (prior to the echo) I was told that with my insurance I did not need a referral. A month or so later I notice that my insurance claim is not approved. After a little investigation I find out I did need a referral.
After speaking with my Dr's office they provided me with a reference number from the conversation that they had with Aetna where they were told I did not need a referral. I took this information and filed a claim with Aetna. Denied. A second claim. Denied. A third. Denied.
Finally went back to Dr. to get a back dated referral. I am now 6 months out from having this done and my Dr office now is telling me they will not back date a referral.
Do I have any recourse. My negotiated rate for the procedure would be $220 and count toward my deductible. As of now I owe $1100 and it does not count toward my deductible. Needless to say this isn't money that I have.
Please help! | Was told I didn't need a referral by insurance. That was wrong and thus my claim denied. Doctors office wont back date a referral and now I owe way more than I can afford. |
t3_4vaek8 | relationships | How do I (23F) support my friend's (28M) initial decision to stop drinking and smoking, now that he's changed his mind? | My fiancé and I are both friends with this really great guy. When we met him, it really seemed like everything was working out for him - he was dating this great gal, had a job he really liked, and was just generally really positive and friendly to be around. He drinks and smokes weed a lot more than we do, but we didn't think it was a problem since he seemed so happy.
The woman he was seeing just dumped him, and it apparently caused him to reevaluate his life a bit. He told us that he thinks he has a problem with weed and alcohol and that he was quitting. He even gave us all his alcohol to take home with us. We have made ourselves more available to him and come up with plans to hang out that are not centered around substances (we go to our house instead, where we don't keep weed, and stopped hanging out at bars) and are generally being very supportive.
Our friend just texted to ask my fiancé to come over (I'm going to work tonight instead) and he asked my fiancé to bring over the alcohol he gave us. We decided not to and came up with an excuse, but I want to know how we should help in the future, if he continues to do this. How do we support him in his initial assessment that he should quit using substances? Should we respect that he has changed his mind? To me, it seems like confirmation that he does have a problem, but I'm not sure how we should handle this. | Friend says he's got a substance problem, then changes his mind. How do we help him cope with a difficult time without supporting a return to destructive coping mechanisms? |
t3_4akuti | relationships | How do I [20 M] talk to my Great Aunt [86 F] who has alzheimer's and other memory problems? | I'm pretty bad at small talk to begin with and I feel really bad when I'm visiting my aunt who lives far away. She's kind of like a grandmother to me. She still has her humor, but just can't communicate any of her thoughts, and repeatedly asks the same questions. I don't know how to talk to her or how to act around her. I want to act normal, but it just seems impossible to talk about anything in life because she'll forget what the sentence is about. Like how do you not just sit there awkwardly? At the same time, she still tries her hardest to maintain a conversation and I feel like I can't contribute much because I don't know what to say or how to act. Like do I try to guess what she's trying to say or just take what she says at face value? | Don't know how to act or what to say around my old aunt who can't speak her thoughts. How do I talk to her without it being awkward? |
t3_1qovdm | tifu | TIFU by snotting on my wife's nose. | So, this morning my schedule and my wife's schedule have overlapping time at home from work. I work nights, she doesn't have to be in until 11 am.
So, I'm a little tired from working my shift, but we haven't had sex in a little while, and I'm kinda horny, so I start going in for the kisses and the touches and the sexy times.
I happen to also have a slight pre-cold, and after a few smooches she pulls back and says, "you know, this would be a lot more attractive if you didn't have a booger in your nose."
At that point I realize that our noses were touching while we were kissing, and she has some (of my) snot on the tip of her nose. I make the big mistake of pointing it out.
"Ewww! Ew ew ew" punctuated with laughter. Laughter? Perhaps I still have a chance! "Well, it's not that bad..." Ohgoddon'tfinishthissentenceshutupshutupshutup. "I mean, you get my semen in you and that's also mucous."
Needless to say, that's why I'm laying here typing this up for your amusement instead of getting laid. You're welcome. | Trying to put on the moves I get snot on wife's nose, try to backpedal by pointing out that semen is also basically snot. |
t3_108s1p | relationships | Am I [20] F being too clingy? | I've never done this sort of thing before so it feels a bit weird.
Myself [20] and my boyfriend [22] have been going out for around 9 months. I have always been a confident and self dependant, at the start of the relationship he often commented how he liked that about me. One of the things that attracted me to him in the beginning is how he aloud me to have my space and took things slow. We are both pretty busy people and would often see each other in the weekend. During the week days we would often chat online for a little while, or he would send me a couple of text. However recently I feel he has blurred the lines between giving me space and neglect. I might text him and he won't get into contact until the next day, if that, to his convenience. He never acknowledges my attempts to contact him, just waits until it suits him. I understand he is busy at work, I am busy at college too and I am still making an effort. Before I attempt to discuss this with him, I wanted reddits opinion, I am becoming another overly attached girlfriend?
This all seems stupid now I have written it down. | Never been an 'always at eachothers hip' couple, however I feel his efforts are diminishing and I want to make sure I'm not an annoying clingy gf before I confront. |
t3_1incbw | relationships | [22 M] Girl I like just started ignoring and I don't know why. I'm not sure what I did or what to do. | So I have known this girl for a few years. We recently started hanging out more the last few weeks and both made it clear we like eachother. We were taking it slow. Had fooled around but no sex. We got along great. 2 days ago we went swimming in the afternoon before I went to work at 3. Everything was great. Afterwards she told me she really liked me and really liked hanging out.
So later that evening I ended up getting off early, around 7. We had plans already to hang out that night when I was off. So I hit her up and see if she wants to hang out. She said she did. I realize I had to run a few errands first and she said ok.
So I ran my errands, and when I was done I texted her. No response. So I waited a few hours. Tried again. No response. Waited until the next day. Again no response. This morning I wake up and sent her a Facebook message asking her what was going on. She deleted my from Facebook after that. I honestly don't have the slightest idea what happened. Everything seemed so fine and then all the sudden no communication.
I can handle rejection, but she didn't tell me anything. Didn't tell me why she was ignoring me or won't speak to me at all. That's all I want. At least tell me to fuck off or leave you alone. I just don't understand what I did or what I can do. I need some kind of closure or something. I at least need to know what I did.
Any advice on what I can do? I'm really upset by all this. | Been talking to a girl I really like. She ignores me out of no where and I don't know why. I'm really upset and need advice. |
t3_10cjqo | AskReddit | Need to do something meaningful! Any advice for those of us who are tired of feeling like sheep? | *I know there are a lot of people out there like me. After searching past submissions a bit, I thought I'd like to get a conversation started on this issue. Maybe something a bit deeper than deleting facebook and hitting the gym.*
I need to contribute to society in a more meaningful way. I want to make the world a better place. I want to do the things I say I'll do, instead of just think about how much I want to do them. I want a reason to wake up in the morning
I'm a web applications developer with hardly any experience. How can I apply my knowledge to make a difference in the world? To feel like I've actually accomplished something?
I checked out [Charity Village] but there are very few jobs in my field, or that I am qualified for. I feel like I need to do something more drastic. | Does anyone have advice for people struggling with the feeling of not doing enough with their life? For people who feel like working 9-5 in an office isn't fulfilling or rewarding enough? |
t3_3bhw1p | relationships | I [21M] reformated my girlfriend's [23F] computer and reinstalled Windows. She's lost her CV in the process, whose fault is this? | I built her computer a while ago and it's my responsibility to keep it maintained and operational. I gave it a complete clean up, inside and out, reinstalling Windows too. Before I did so I scoured both hard drives for any important files she may wish to keep. I even asked her for those I wasn't sure about. Moreover I copied some files that she may not even want but I did anyway.
I did my utmost to ensure no important data was lost. She's now extremely angry at me because "I lost her CV". Is it her fault for not specifying **exactly** the files which are imperative? Is it her fault for not backing up her own important files? Or is it my fault for making an honest mistake in the process of helping her?
I realise my wording is very strongly defensive for my side of the story but I'm actually quite pissed that she's putting this blame on me! | Reinstalled Windows on girlfriend's PC. I tried backing up everything which was important but must have overlooked her CV somehow. Is it my fault for making a mistake or hers for not specifying/backing up her own files? |
t3_372itc | relationships | My [23 M] bf was really rough with me [22 F] and scared me | I've been with my bf for 3 years. He's a big guy (muscular) so it's happened many times where he's accidentally hurt me because he doesn't know his own strength. Not just during sex, but cuddling, picking me up, etc. Not a big deal as it's never been anything serious.
Well I'm watching my neighbors dog this weekend and my bf came over too. The dog was lying on the couch and I wanted to sit with him and pet him for a minute (he's a sweet, adorable Boxer). My bf was in the other room watching TV.
Next thing I know he comes and picks me up sooooo roughly and painfully and was like, "Why the fuck are you sitting with the dog, why are you not sitting with me?!" And he just had this crazy look in his eyes; I was actually scared and he's never scared me before. And no man has ever scared me before like that. It was a terrible feeling. So I basically shut down after it happened and he still wouldn't let go of me for a while, despite my completely cold body language.
He apologized and said he was just trying to be rough to be 'hot', and didn't mean to hurt me. And that he underestimates my fragility. But I was emotional and crying and didn't want to talk to him or look at him, I just wanted him to leave. I hated the look in his eyes and that he scared me like that. I never want to feel that again. Eventually he asked if we were done and I just said I didn't know.
I just really need outside opinions... I feel awful and I'm not sure what to do. If I should give him the benefit of the doubt and forgive him or what. Not sure if I'm overreacting either. | Bf was really really rough and scared me, not sure how to respond. I've never been in this type of situation before. |
t3_4afove | tifu | TIFU by talking to jamie lee curtis | This happened a few months back, and now that I no longer work with the company I can say this with no repercussions. I worked at a very successful restaurant here in new orleans and knowing someone who owns a transportation company he sends clients my way all the time. Well the friends father drives JLC often when she is in the city and said she loves to eat where i work. So one random I come out the kitchen and look in my section and see JLC with Emma Roberts. I great them and have them water brought out and when i go back to the table I ask her "Did Joe drop you off?" she then looks at me and asks "how do you know Joe?" I respond "Ive known his son for years and live with him." She then blurts out very loudly "I didnt know Joe's son had a Boy Friend." I almost choked i laughed so hard and she goes "thats not a funny question look at what day and age we live in thats a very normal assumption." I politely tell her "im not gay and neither is my friend." so the weekend goes by and i forgot about the interaction with her. So when i come in my next shift i begin to get asked by people whats it like to be accused of being gay by JLC. Then the GM of the whole restaurant group comes in and makes fun of me for the questions due to one of the managers putting it in the nightly log. so i finally find out my shit lord of a friend walks by and hears her ask if im gay and told the whole staff i work with. And for a month I was known as the guy accused of being gay by JLC. | I asked jamie lee curtis if she knew a friend she then asked me if i was gay and the whole restaurant found out. |
t3_q6gt2 | AskReddit | Tonight, I purposely caused an accident out of rage and frustration. What the fuck is wrong with me? | I can't even fucking believe I just did this. I was supposed to meet a friend at this event, but he bailed at the last minute. I was already really stressed about this event for a couple reasons I won't go into here. My rage and frustration boiled over, and I basically freaked out on the road looking for ANY excuse not to go. I ended up slamming on the brakes, leading the guy in back of me to hit me. The cops blamed him, since I told them I hit the brakes because a cyclist was weaving into my lane.
Now, a few hours later, having calmed down, I realize I basically endangered my life and the other driver's, AND left him with the blame, just because I couldn't manage my own frustration. I feel like total shit. Seriously, I think I need to see a psychiatrist. I don't think normal people do this. What the fuck is wrong with me? | I was raging and so frustrated at being ditched for an event, that I purposely caused a car accident just so I could have an excuse not to go. |
t3_15n6a2 | GetMotivated | Why can't I just seem to DO anything? | Hey r/getmotivated. I don't know if this is the right place for this post. I've been subscribed to this subreddit for a few months now. And I've done nothing with it. I look at other people's posts, I think "wow that's really inspiring" and then I just go on browsing Reddit.
Like a lot of people, I have a million things I want to do with my life. I want to learn how to sail, I want to play the guitar, I want to sing more, I want to take ballroom dance lessons, I want to travel the world, I want to meet new people, I want to lose weight, I want to get fit, I want to eat better, I want to keep my room clean, I want to work smarter at my job and further my career. But, I just can't seem to actually do any of those things.
Today, I planned to wake up early and get my laundry done. It's now 5pm and I only got out of bed twice, once to use the bathroom and once to get some breakfast. I can't even get myself motivated to do the little things like laundry! I work a lot during the week so my excuse on the weekends is that I'm just relaxing and recuperating. In reality, I'm just wasting my life away. Bottom line is I am just plain lazy.
The laziness has been a problem all my life. But somehow, (good timing and luck I guess) I've managed to graduate from law school and have a pretty good job working as an attorney. But that's where it ends. I have nothing else going on in my life and I'm too lazy to go achieve anything. Sometimes I'll get motivated for a few weeks, or months even. But eventually I just go back to doing nothing with my life. How can I stop this cycle?
I see friends on FB going out and doing things and I get jealous. But what's preventing me from doing those things? I just don't get it. What is it going to take for me to not just want more, but do more?
Sorry for the wall of text. | I feel like I spend my life in bed with no motivation to do anything, though I have lots of things I wish I could do. |
t3_32lqrh | relationships | Me [16M] and my SO [16F] broke up a week ago because we felt "iffy" about the relationship and im not sure if it was the right thing to do | Disclaimer: this might not be as serious as plenty of other posts here but im another soul in need of advice.
So my girlfriend and I have dated for 5 months (sorry all you year-daters) and honestly it was a blast. She was my first girlfriend and my best friend now that i think about it and we had a group of friends to hang out with and everything it was perfect. We had a variety of interests in common and it was the best. But around the end of these 5 months i was seriously considering breaking up with her because i was just tired. Time comes around like it always does and she says she needs to have a talk with me through Skype when we get home. It turns out she had the same idea in mind and we had both known what was coming. So we do so in tears and what not all those emotions and junk until a couple of hours later she wants to get back with me. We talk about this through text for a long time and i ultimately say no thinking its for the better.
A week later we've still talked a bit (break ups amirite?) but not as much as we used and everything but the days have been slow and sad. I dont have a group of friends to hang out with during the weekend or in lunch during school anymore as it was because it was her group of friends. I go to our school's band room to hang out with my best friend but other than that i feel like im not wanted there. I miss her but i dont know if this is a symptom of break ups or that i just need more time to get over it or not. I just dont want to be sad like this any more.
Sorry if theres not enough details ill provide more if necessary
Please and thanks | i broke up with my girlfriend of 5 months a week ago and im still not sure if i did the right thing or not by doing so seeing as i feel like garbage. |
t3_2zfuq1 | relationships | My boyfriend [26M] just slapped me [19F] and I'm outside sitting in the woods not sure where to go from here | I already know what you're going to say, break up with him. And I always thought this would be an easy decision if I was ever faced with it, but I was wrong.
My boyfriend and I have been together for just over two years. We are currently living in my parents house and going to college and working. We have had our ups and downs but he means the world to me and I never thought something like this would happen. We got in a fight over nothing, I don't even know, and I went to bed. He woke me up saying he wanted to kill himself but then acted like he hadn't said anything when he clearly had. We then got in an argument and he was yelling and its 1 am and I don't want to wake my parents so I'm saying,"what's wrong with you?" Over a few times and he slapped me. Not very hard and not full on the face but he slapped me. I ran out of the house and I'm currently in the woods and it's very cold. I don't want to go back because I don't know what to say to my parents and I don't want to break up with him and then regret it because I can't tell my parents and then take it back. I don't know what to do. He just left in his car. | My boyfriend slapped me and I don't really feel like I should break up with him but I know what everyone else will say. |
t3_24hxdz | relationships | I [22 F] want to help my [20 M] boyfriend feel successful | I started dating my boyfriend shortly before graduating college (1 year ago) and am still in town working because I found a great job. He is graduating in a few weeks and staying here for grad school, and moving in with me. He hasn't had a steady job throughout college because he did a lot of extra curriculars which gave him a lot of experience in leadership, management, and specific skills. He is really smart and mature, and one of the most reliable people I know. There is no way he won't land an awesome job doing something he is passionate about in the future.
His parents paid for his rent and education, and he has to start paying them back in the fall. He has been searching for jobs with no luck. Even minimum wage jobs aren't picking him up because he hasn't worked in actual customer service since high school/early college. He just got a job at the performing arts center at the university (which is perfect for him), but he won't work enough to pay his parents AND his half of living expenses. He obviously needs to supplement it with another job, which he has had no luck in landing.
He is getting really down on himself and it is killing me. I send him job listings that I come across that would possibly work for his experience and availability, but still no luck.Deep down, the money really doesn't matter to me. I am doing just fine paying for the apartment by myself, and could continue to do so once he officially moves in. I knkow a job has to come along eventually...but how do I encourage him and keep him positive while we wait? I love him so much and he is my best friend. I feel as useless as he does. Help. | My boyfriend can't find a job and is about to start grad school and move in. He feels useless and I want to help him, but I feel just as useless, even though I make enough money to cover our living expenses. |
t3_1mv2fm | relationships | Me [M21] My friend [M20] and Girl [20]; not your typical triangle | I want your honest opinions about how I reacted and my friend reacted in this situation.
Basically, my friend "John" has been pining after this girl "Jane" who was our friend for a year. Jane hooked up with our roommate and had feelings for him, which were not returned. After the roommate moved out, John decided to actively pursue Jane. After one date and an awkward kiss, Jane decided it was a no-go.
Fast forward 9 months. Jane's been in another relationship for 8 months now, I'm with our group of friends for a night of drinking. I find out Jane is very recently single. **game changer** I was diagnosed bipolar literally a week before this. My sex drive was through the roof, literally an obsession. Around 2 am after everyone else is asleep but me and Jane, I ask her if she would want to hook up. She says no. I go to sleep, thinking nothing of it.
3 days later I get a text from John saying I'm a piece of shit, a terrible person, and if he sees me again he will beat me up. I say "I'm sorry" as I realize what he's talking about, it honestly didn't even cross my mind since she said no. All I was thinking about was who I was going to sleep with next--again, sex drive out of control. I'd told him about my diagnosis before all of this, and how I literally couldn't control myself (I wound up in the mental hospital later because of this). I was not trying to use it as an excuse, but an explanation. All he could say was "Regardless of mental illness, you should know the difference between right and wrong."
This is where it's tricky. I know I wouldn't have asked Jane to sleep with me if I wasn't bipolar. I also know *we didn't do anything.* But from his perspective he sees it as a betrayal, and won't forgive me. I think he overreacted and is acting childish, but my thinking processes clearly aren't always the best.
Thoughts on the situation? | I asked love interest of my friend to sleep with me after I received bipolar diagnosis. Friend wouldn't forgive me, blames me entirely, won't recognize illness. What does this mean for our friendship? |
t3_hifrn | AskReddit | Let's hear some embarrassing stories! | I'll start off. In high school English class we were reviewing grammar by fixing grammatically incorrect sentences that the teacher had written on the board. This one girl that I liked went up and started correcting, and needless to say, I stared at her ass (which was very nice, might I add). Just before this, I had asked the teacher about the difference in the uses of whom and who. It was while the teacher was answering my question, that I found myself checking out the aforementioned girl's rear end. Inevitably, the teacher suddenly says, "uniquenewyork, if you are confused about the work, I suggest you pay attention to what I am saying and stop ogling at "girl's" ass!" The entire class erupted in laughter, and the girl looked at me in embarrassment and disgust. Things were incredibly awkward for us after that, and even worse so because we sat beside each other. I was also the laughing stock of the class for the next month or so. | I was caught staring at a girls ass and called out on it by the teacher, and became the laughing stock of the class. |
t3_cn5g8 | self | Reddit, i'm not happy. This isn't new to me, but it's never gone on this long. | I pretty much range from noir to destitute these days. i'm one of those depressed gits you run into, but in my younger age i was able to sort of hide that.
Things used to balance out after a few days at first, then later, months. As time has passed, this has turned into years. Lately, it's been over 3 since i've been happy, or even able to truly function. This worries me, since my depression is getting worse. I don't want to take drugs, i've tried that before and it didn't work at all. it made things worse.
Don't feel the need to jump into /r/suicidewatch or anything, but i'm really not happy. i don't need a personal clown to cheer me up, but i'm pretty tired at this point, and after so long i just don't know what to do. | I'm an old emo (31), minus vampire sparkles. i don't go out much, i do have friends, but i don't hang out much with anyone either. My life isn't really enjoyable. |
t3_1yhfgl | relationships | I think my boyfriend may be capable of killing me, but I'm okay with that. Am I crazy for this? | My [F 21] boyfriend [M 29] has always had this HUGE trust problem and also being able to love someone completely. But he has been able to open up to me and get closer to me than he has with anyone else before. I have opened up his world sexually to bdsm and he has discovered he loves it, he enjoys hitting me and choking me. he once choked me so good I passed out during sex. he didn't stop he just kept going. I now feel like I'm getting off subject, to get to the point of this post; I somehow feel deep down if I was to hurt him in anyway he might would kill me. I don't feel threatened by this at all. I know I'm in contro,
id never want to hurt him. but just curious if I was crazy because of this?
(btw this is my very first post) | just curious if I'm crazy for being with someone who I know might kill me if I ever hurt them and not being bothered by it. |
t3_2yg25z | relationships | My [22 M] sister's [25 F] foreign boyfriend [23 M] cheated on her while she was home for 2 months. | So it's hard for me to type this without shaking with rage.
My sister lived in Spain for the past 2 years or so. She got a boyfriend there, who she ended up falling in love with. He was a little bit of an urchin there, and all her Spanish friends warned her about him, but she was convinced they were wrong. They have some remnants of "class elitism" there which is why I think she was so adamant to prove them wrong (we are American).
Fast forward, this past fall she came home for two months before he was supposed to come to America with her for three months on visa. In the period of those two months, he slept with another woman. He didn't tell her. Our family took him in with open arms. Paid for everything and more or less a two-month adventure of a lifetime with her all across the country. Even my tiny little abuelita paid thousands of dollars (even though they are poor) to fix him when he got hurt.
And it came out yesterday that he cheated and lied to her. Kept the lie going and rode on her funds through America. She was devastated obviously. But what the hell. How do I keep myself from killing this guy when I come back home this Friday? He is still here. Is there any way to move past this and how do I make my sister feel better after she is so embarrassed and ashamed for trusting someone like this and being duped? She was going to return to Spain after spring. | sisters foreign boyfriend came to US not telling her that he cheated on her while she was home for two months and now I am probably going to take a shit in his food. |
t3_4yssxz | relationships | I [18M] don't know if I should keep trying with my girlfriend [18F] | Hey all,
I'm really caught at a crossing point, I've been with this girl for a little over a year and we've been on "Break" for about a month or so now. We've had issues before and differences and we decided that a break from our relationship to focus on ourselves was what we needed
At first I was okay with it as we did need a break from our 24/7 hang out but now she's talking to other guys, she had intercourse with one a couple of times and when he didn't work out she found someone else and is talking to them and probably flirting/making advances on him... she says she's having fun on her break and that she's not focused on relationships, this hurts me as I get to know about all of it and get nothing from her she's always flirting and wanting to fuck that guy and even saying if she finds interest in someone else I should move on and yet says she still loves me and wants to be with me and that she's my baby etc
so do I try and rekindle things because when we were together she was loyal and I love her greatly and would hate to see this go because she's pretty much everything I could want in a girl aside from these antics that she's pulling now. | went on "break" from year relationship and now she's fucking another guy and flirting saying it could go either way and that I may loose her to a guy she finds interest in |
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