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3yuk25 | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | [Missouri] Grandpa passed away, but left no will. His girlfriend locked the doors and claims everything is hers since it's in her house. Help? My grandpa passed away a little while ago. He had a long-term girlfriend, but they never married for financial reasons. His girlfriend owns the house that they lived in before he passed, and from what his girlfriend says, he did not have a will. The girlfriend was friendly and cooperative while he was still alive, but as soon as he died she locked her doors and cut off contact with our family, stating that everything in the house was hers. She went as far as to tell her neighbors to "call the cops if you see anyone at the house who isn't hispanic", explaining that we were trying to steal from her. All of my grandpa's worldly possessions (minus his truck, which was titled and registered in only his name) are trapped inside her house. I'm afraid that she will sell off all of his possessions or distribute them among her family. There are many items that have sentimental value to us that we would like to keep in the family. Is there any legal action I could take to get back, if nothing more, a couple of things that we have memories of? | cyh0xan | cygyb39 | 1,451,539,998 | 1,451,534,638 | 21 | 13 | Legal advice is all well and good, but here's some practical advice - accept the fact that any tangible possessions inside her home are gone. You will likely never see them, and if you do, it will only be stuff she doesn't care about. I have been in your shoes. I had an entire team of attorneys. It doesn't matter. Come to terms now with the physical property being gone, and you will be all the more grateful for anything you do end up getting. | Get a probate lawyer right now. You'll need one in order to figure out how to secure his possessions and accounts. | 1 | 5,360 | 1.615385 |
wojt95 | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | Step-dad “can’t find” moms will and rewrote one to give his daughters everything. Let me explain. My dad passed away when I was 8, it’s only my two brothers and I. My mom got sick with Covid and passed unexpectedly, like a lot of people. It was horrible for my brothers and I. Especially me because my mom has always been my best friend and we latched hard to her after my fathers death. Anyways, my step dad has 3 daughters. At the time my mom got sick, she was full time taking care of my step dads mother and sister and very depressed because of it. Once she passed, his daughter, her wife and my niece moved into the house. He kicked my older brother out (He did deserve it honestly because he has issues with alcohol these days). This house is a double wide with 4 bedrooms, at this point there’s 7 people in there. My little brother was really depressed and feeling pushed out since they were sleeping in the living room and he felt guilty for having his on room when they have a whole family. I am a single female that lives in a four bedroom house alone. I work really hard for what I have, so I made the decision to take him in and he lives with me now. The problem is, my step dad did something with my moms will. Both my brother and I physically saw the will, as we were both at the house living there, in her room, when she told us she finally had one made. The folder was on the dresser and I made the joke of wanting to look at it and she said, of course baby. I didn’t look at it and definitely didn’t want to think about her death. That was at least 8 years ago. Now my step dad acts like he doesn’t remember she had a will and like he couldn’t find it anywhere (it was in their safe which he said he couldn’t remember the code for but then all of a sudden he did remember her code and it wasnt in there he said) He had a will done and gave everything to his oldest daughter AND took out life insurance for them. My older brother got kicked out when he found out because he got drunk and said it wasnt fair and he knows why he did it. My mom was not wealthy, again a double wide but she did have things I know she wanted me to have and my brothers. A lot my step dad is feigning knowledge of. I filed to obtain her death certificate, hes changed all her email passwords and stuff so I can’t find it anywhere else, the will, that is. I finally got her death certificate in the mail (she passed in December) and there is no record of him having probated anything with the local court so I dont think his is legal. Do I get an attorney next? What is the next step? I know I had to get her death certificate first so I got that step done. TL;DR Moms will stolen by step dad after death (pretending it didn’t exist) and rewritten to give his daughters everything. Probate not filed so it can’t be legal. I have her death certificate, what is my next step? A lawyer to locate her will? | ikd618z | ikd8e0q | 1,660,558,909 | 1,660,560,644 | 9 | 45 | OP start asking around if anyone knows who witnessed your mum’s will. Could it have been a neighbour? A friend? A colleague? | The lawyer that prepared it for her would have a copy of it. If you remember who it could have been give them a call. You can also just start calling up lawyers in the area assuming you're not in a metropolis and ask if they had ever prepared a will for her. | 0 | 1,735 | 5 |
wojt95 | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | Step-dad “can’t find” moms will and rewrote one to give his daughters everything. Let me explain. My dad passed away when I was 8, it’s only my two brothers and I. My mom got sick with Covid and passed unexpectedly, like a lot of people. It was horrible for my brothers and I. Especially me because my mom has always been my best friend and we latched hard to her after my fathers death. Anyways, my step dad has 3 daughters. At the time my mom got sick, she was full time taking care of my step dads mother and sister and very depressed because of it. Once she passed, his daughter, her wife and my niece moved into the house. He kicked my older brother out (He did deserve it honestly because he has issues with alcohol these days). This house is a double wide with 4 bedrooms, at this point there’s 7 people in there. My little brother was really depressed and feeling pushed out since they were sleeping in the living room and he felt guilty for having his on room when they have a whole family. I am a single female that lives in a four bedroom house alone. I work really hard for what I have, so I made the decision to take him in and he lives with me now. The problem is, my step dad did something with my moms will. Both my brother and I physically saw the will, as we were both at the house living there, in her room, when she told us she finally had one made. The folder was on the dresser and I made the joke of wanting to look at it and she said, of course baby. I didn’t look at it and definitely didn’t want to think about her death. That was at least 8 years ago. Now my step dad acts like he doesn’t remember she had a will and like he couldn’t find it anywhere (it was in their safe which he said he couldn’t remember the code for but then all of a sudden he did remember her code and it wasnt in there he said) He had a will done and gave everything to his oldest daughter AND took out life insurance for them. My older brother got kicked out when he found out because he got drunk and said it wasnt fair and he knows why he did it. My mom was not wealthy, again a double wide but she did have things I know she wanted me to have and my brothers. A lot my step dad is feigning knowledge of. I filed to obtain her death certificate, hes changed all her email passwords and stuff so I can’t find it anywhere else, the will, that is. I finally got her death certificate in the mail (she passed in December) and there is no record of him having probated anything with the local court so I dont think his is legal. Do I get an attorney next? What is the next step? I know I had to get her death certificate first so I got that step done. TL;DR Moms will stolen by step dad after death (pretending it didn’t exist) and rewritten to give his daughters everything. Probate not filed so it can’t be legal. I have her death certificate, what is my next step? A lawyer to locate her will? | ikd618z | ikdh1vf | 1,660,558,909 | 1,660,566,057 | 9 | 10 | OP start asking around if anyone knows who witnessed your mum’s will. Could it have been a neighbour? A friend? A colleague? | You don't just need a probate attorney, you need an estate litigator. Make sure the attorney you hire has experienced with estate litigation | 0 | 7,148 | 1.111111 |
aq9o11 | legaladvice_train | 1 | Mother in law is suing for visitation NY (Apparently it's good form to apologize when using mobile.) Today I was served with papers to go to family court so my MIL can have visitation with my children. A bit of backstory, my MIL is mentally unstable. She believes everyone is hacking her, me included. Shes extremely paranoid and tries to brainwash my kids, tells them I'm hacking her, that climate change is a hoax, Crystal's have healing power. (Admittedly the last 2 are no big deal, the first one is the huge deal.) The wife and her mother had a falling out over the accusing me of being hacked into her phone. My MIL expressed interest in seeing the kids, we told her if she wanted to see our children, she had to do so under our supervision. She then began gaslighting my wife by telling her me and my wife both have borderline personality disorder and told this to the entire family. Does my MIL have any right to take my children out of my supervision? Does she have a case? Should I get a lawyer? If I should get a lawyer, how can I get one if I'm broke? Any and all advice would be extremely helpful. | egegiw3 | egef09e | 1,550,084,553 | 1,550,083,536 | 391 | 115 | So NY apparently does have grandparents rights laws that are generous to grandparents. I suggest getting a lawyer. Also gather any/all evidence that you are not trying to prevent her from seeing the kids in a supervised situation - invitations to have her over to your home, or to join the family on an outing, etc. | > Admittedly the last 2 are no big deal Agree to disagree on that. > Does my MIL have any right to take my children out of my supervision? Unlikely. > Does she have a case? If you and your wife both say no a suit for visitation is going to be difficult. Even in NY. If you are both saying no and MIL is a nut the burden for her to establish visitation rights is going to be extraordinarily high. > Should I get a lawyer? If you've been served it's usually a good idea. Has she actually moved forward with a suit or is she blowing smoke? | 1 | 1,017 | 3.4 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | ett1f2d | etswocz | 1,563,161,534 | 1,563,157,633 | 1,689 | 257 | Adding to the other comments, inform the hospital when you check in for delivery that MIL is unwelcome, and you request that she be removed from the hospital if she shows up. | Right now it’s just threats. Ignore them. Threats have no power unless you give them power. Most people who make threats never carry them out. If she actually “sues” (that is, requests a court order or files a petition for visitation rights), then get a lawyer. More on grandparent visitation rights in general: https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/grandparent-caretaker-visitation-rights-29548.html | 1 | 3,901 | 6.571984 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | etsx20l | ett1f2d | 1,563,157,941 | 1,563,161,534 | 85 | 1,689 | She has an uphill battle, BUT if she has lots of $$$$$, she could force y'all to pay $$$ to stop this. She most likely won't prevail, but this could cost y'all some cash to prevent it. Ignore her until she actually files. | Adding to the other comments, inform the hospital when you check in for delivery that MIL is unwelcome, and you request that she be removed from the hospital if she shows up. | 0 | 3,593 | 19.870588 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | ett0zpl | ett1f2d | 1,563,161,171 | 1,563,161,534 | 66 | 1,689 | Do not wait until she sues. Go see a family law lawyer now. Ask what actions you should take to prevent her having any chance of grandparents rights. This woman just threatened to take your child from you. Believe her. Take preventative action now. | Adding to the other comments, inform the hospital when you check in for delivery that MIL is unwelcome, and you request that she be removed from the hospital if she shows up. | 0 | 363 | 25.590909 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | ett294z | etswocz | 1,563,162,269 | 1,563,157,633 | 679 | 257 | Without a prior extensive relationship with the child, and a finding that parents are somehow unfit, she has a snowflake's chance in hell of obtaining visitation. ​ This is a *Troxel v. Granville* situation (a SCOTUS case) that directs trial Courts to give "special consideration" (read: weight) to the decisions of parents regarding the best interest of a child when applied to grandparent visitation. "Whether it will be beneficial to child to have relationship with grandparent is, in any specific case, a decision for parent to make in first instance, and if a fit parent's decision becomes subject to judicial review, court must accord at least some special weight to parent's own determination." *Troxel v. Granville*, 530 U.S. 57, 120 S. Ct. 2054, 147 L. Ed. 2d 49 (2000). ​ In your case, I might send her a letter telling her that she is not welcome at the birth or your home, or to initiate contact with your minor child without your consent. Then again, sending such a letter may further enflame her, and the lack of such assertions are unlikely to give her rights. Make it clear she's not welcome, and keep records, and if she decides to show up, you can get a Civil Protection Order if you feel you or your child are in immediate danger of harm from her. | Right now it’s just threats. Ignore them. Threats have no power unless you give them power. Most people who make threats never carry them out. If she actually “sues” (that is, requests a court order or files a petition for visitation rights), then get a lawyer. More on grandparent visitation rights in general: https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/grandparent-caretaker-visitation-rights-29548.html | 1 | 4,636 | 2.642023 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | etsx20l | ett294z | 1,563,157,941 | 1,563,162,269 | 85 | 679 | She has an uphill battle, BUT if she has lots of $$$$$, she could force y'all to pay $$$ to stop this. She most likely won't prevail, but this could cost y'all some cash to prevent it. Ignore her until she actually files. | Without a prior extensive relationship with the child, and a finding that parents are somehow unfit, she has a snowflake's chance in hell of obtaining visitation. ​ This is a *Troxel v. Granville* situation (a SCOTUS case) that directs trial Courts to give "special consideration" (read: weight) to the decisions of parents regarding the best interest of a child when applied to grandparent visitation. "Whether it will be beneficial to child to have relationship with grandparent is, in any specific case, a decision for parent to make in first instance, and if a fit parent's decision becomes subject to judicial review, court must accord at least some special weight to parent's own determination." *Troxel v. Granville*, 530 U.S. 57, 120 S. Ct. 2054, 147 L. Ed. 2d 49 (2000). ​ In your case, I might send her a letter telling her that she is not welcome at the birth or your home, or to initiate contact with your minor child without your consent. Then again, sending such a letter may further enflame her, and the lack of such assertions are unlikely to give her rights. Make it clear she's not welcome, and keep records, and if she decides to show up, you can get a Civil Protection Order if you feel you or your child are in immediate danger of harm from her. | 0 | 4,328 | 7.988235 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | ett0zpl | ett294z | 1,563,161,171 | 1,563,162,269 | 66 | 679 | Do not wait until she sues. Go see a family law lawyer now. Ask what actions you should take to prevent her having any chance of grandparents rights. This woman just threatened to take your child from you. Believe her. Take preventative action now. | Without a prior extensive relationship with the child, and a finding that parents are somehow unfit, she has a snowflake's chance in hell of obtaining visitation. ​ This is a *Troxel v. Granville* situation (a SCOTUS case) that directs trial Courts to give "special consideration" (read: weight) to the decisions of parents regarding the best interest of a child when applied to grandparent visitation. "Whether it will be beneficial to child to have relationship with grandparent is, in any specific case, a decision for parent to make in first instance, and if a fit parent's decision becomes subject to judicial review, court must accord at least some special weight to parent's own determination." *Troxel v. Granville*, 530 U.S. 57, 120 S. Ct. 2054, 147 L. Ed. 2d 49 (2000). ​ In your case, I might send her a letter telling her that she is not welcome at the birth or your home, or to initiate contact with your minor child without your consent. Then again, sending such a letter may further enflame her, and the lack of such assertions are unlikely to give her rights. Make it clear she's not welcome, and keep records, and if she decides to show up, you can get a Civil Protection Order if you feel you or your child are in immediate danger of harm from her. | 0 | 1,098 | 10.287879 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | ette4od | etswocz | 1,563,175,294 | 1,563,157,633 | 470 | 257 | There is nothing to be worried about. Your husband is still alive and she doesnt have an existing relationship with your child. The best thing you can do is keep the hell away from her. Also, inform the hospital, any future pediatricians, daycares, etc of her. Make sure they are clear that she is a nutterbutter and not to be let within 10 feet of your child. | Right now it’s just threats. Ignore them. Threats have no power unless you give them power. Most people who make threats never carry them out. If she actually “sues” (that is, requests a court order or files a petition for visitation rights), then get a lawyer. More on grandparent visitation rights in general: https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/grandparent-caretaker-visitation-rights-29548.html | 1 | 17,661 | 1.828794 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | ette4od | etsx20l | 1,563,175,294 | 1,563,157,941 | 470 | 85 | There is nothing to be worried about. Your husband is still alive and she doesnt have an existing relationship with your child. The best thing you can do is keep the hell away from her. Also, inform the hospital, any future pediatricians, daycares, etc of her. Make sure they are clear that she is a nutterbutter and not to be let within 10 feet of your child. | She has an uphill battle, BUT if she has lots of $$$$$, she could force y'all to pay $$$ to stop this. She most likely won't prevail, but this could cost y'all some cash to prevent it. Ignore her until she actually files. | 1 | 17,353 | 5.529412 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | ett0zpl | ette4od | 1,563,161,171 | 1,563,175,294 | 66 | 470 | Do not wait until she sues. Go see a family law lawyer now. Ask what actions you should take to prevent her having any chance of grandparents rights. This woman just threatened to take your child from you. Believe her. Take preventative action now. | There is nothing to be worried about. Your husband is still alive and she doesnt have an existing relationship with your child. The best thing you can do is keep the hell away from her. Also, inform the hospital, any future pediatricians, daycares, etc of her. Make sure they are clear that she is a nutterbutter and not to be let within 10 feet of your child. | 0 | 14,123 | 7.121212 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | etty5s7 | etsx20l | 1,563,199,408 | 1,563,157,941 | 135 | 85 | Not a lawyer and not so much legal advice as a heads up for what may be coming down the road. I've dealt with this from a family member and her strained relationship with her daughter: CPS. It's quite possible that MIL will ask, pry, poke around in your business and when it's a no go, retaliatory calls to CPS begin. I forget the percentage of false calls to CPS but I want to say it's fairly high. A CPS follow up doesn't mean you did anything wrong, just means CPS is doing their job. You can get well meaning calls from neighbors who think you aren't parenting correctly to the outright lies just to cause you trouble. | She has an uphill battle, BUT if she has lots of $$$$$, she could force y'all to pay $$$ to stop this. She most likely won't prevail, but this could cost y'all some cash to prevent it. Ignore her until she actually files. | 1 | 41,467 | 1.588235 |
cdbmpd | legaladvice_train | 0.99 | Mother in-law says she’s suing for visitation Long story short my husband and I had not talked to my MIL in a year after she chose her boyfriend over attending our wedding. She learned through her ex husband that we were expecting about 6 months ago. She called my husband earlier this week and informed him she would be coming for the birth (first contact in about a year), he told her no. I’m due in 3 weeks and she contacted us again today telling us she would be suing for visitation rights to see her grandchild and would see this out to the end. We live in PA and she lives in GA. I’ve read the laws for both states regarding grandparent visitation and it doesn’t seem like she has any ground to stand on. My question is 2 parts- 1. Do we have any reason to be concerned? 2. Is there anything we should do proactively to protect our family? Thanks! | ett0zpl | etty5s7 | 1,563,161,171 | 1,563,199,408 | 66 | 135 | Do not wait until she sues. Go see a family law lawyer now. Ask what actions you should take to prevent her having any chance of grandparents rights. This woman just threatened to take your child from you. Believe her. Take preventative action now. | Not a lawyer and not so much legal advice as a heads up for what may be coming down the road. I've dealt with this from a family member and her strained relationship with her daughter: CPS. It's quite possible that MIL will ask, pry, poke around in your business and when it's a no go, retaliatory calls to CPS begin. I forget the percentage of false calls to CPS but I want to say it's fairly high. A CPS follow up doesn't mean you did anything wrong, just means CPS is doing their job. You can get well meaning calls from neighbors who think you aren't parenting correctly to the outright lies just to cause you trouble. | 0 | 38,237 | 2.045455 |
zvulju | legaladvice_train | 0.74 | (Update) a fling from 7 months ago just told me she was pregnant Original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/zuccqp/a_fling_from_7_months_ago_just_told_me_she_was/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf Updating here because previous post was locked. I just had a consultation with an Oklahoma attorney specializing in child custody. It seems like I have a few options, but none of them are ideal. I also had a phone conversation with the mother, and I recorded it, and there are a lot of concerns I have after speaking with her. Starting with my phone call… the mother did not budge on her being pregnant. I did not believe her at first, but she never backed down it. She also never backed down on that I was the father, though she often evaded in any straight forward responses and I still have my doubts. She texted me an image of a sonogram. I reverse image searched the sonogram, and didn’t find any matches, though tbh I’m still new and unsure on how to do it accurately. I couldn’t tell if the sonogram was on thermal paper or cardboard paper, idk. The GA age of the baby that was marked on the sonogram matches up with when we last slept together. She is still denying me a prenatal paternity test. So I won’t know the truth until after the baby is born. She still wants to give the baby up for adoption. When I expressed my desire to raise the child myself, she became very combative… “you would take my baby away from me!?”… so I think if it comes down to a non adoption case scenario, she is going to fight me for custody. I think she’s mentally unwell, and was unstable before the pregnancy, and I am in a better place to raise a young one. There was also some concerning explosions that she had on the recorded phone call. But it doesn’t seem like Oklahoma sees her mental state as a way to relieve custody. About my consultation with the attorney, it seems Oklahoma is a state that heavily favors the mother in all aspects of custody. If I fought for custody, then she would likely have to have the baby for the first year due to nursing. I don’t think she would want to give up the baby after that. It seems like my best road forward to get custody for the child is to start providing a paper trail of my interest in her pregnancy. This would need to start with me serving her a request to a paternity test. This would also halt any adoption proceedings. My attorney made it clear that my rights as a father diminish exponentially after the baby is born so I need to act now if I want custody. However, since I live in a different state (Kentucky) custody battles would heavily favor the mother. My first question: would having a recorded verbal or written agreement to a paternity test after birth from her serve as a paper trail to show my interest in the child? It’s going to be $1500 to serve her, which isn’t the end of the world, but I don’t have a ton of money and need to start saving for a baby and future litigations. It’s going to be either $225/ hour or $300/hour to pursue future disputes after serving her. How many hours do you all foresee a case like this going if it gets messy? My second question: the attorney mentioned some disqualifying factors that may result in her losing custody of the child. But because Oklahoma favors the mom, it seemed like it would need to be extreme neglect or drug related charges to result in her losing custody. The mother still lives with her parents and they still don’t know about her pregnancy (even though she’s 7 months!?) she worries they will kick her out if they found out. Would homelessness be a disqualification? She would probably live with a friend if this happened so I doubt she’d be on the streets, but I’m just curious about how deep the disqualifications go. My third question: if the mother gave up the child for adoption without my signature and without my current intervention. The father was just a John Doe… well, how could I learn about the child in the future? If the child was safe and loved with adopted parents then I wouldn’t want to interfere but I would want to know about them and would want to have some kind of relationship even if it’s a distant one. Thanks, for everyone’s advice and messages. Let’s try not to get this post locked out this time :) | j1rdjza | j1rd7ec | 1,672,085,690 | 1,672,085,520 | 17 | 6 | I think you need to reset your expectations here. Remember that courts rule in the best interest of the child, and the best interest of the child is almost always to have both parents in their life. 1. Wait for there to be a baby. 2. Get an official paternity test. 3. If it's yours, go to court to establish custody/visitation. This is pretty straightforward. Hire a lawyer. A court isn't going to ban one of the child's parents from being in their life, unless something horrific happens. Right now there's no baby, maybe there won't be one. Maybe it's not yours. Who knows. | With a note that I know nothing about this firm and am not recommending them, this blog post will tell you pretty much everything you need to know. Pay special attention to the putative father registry portion. That's the key for you. http://www.bulleighlaw.com/contact-us/adoption-services/putative-father | 1 | 170 | 2.833333 |
zvulju | legaladvice_train | 0.74 | (Update) a fling from 7 months ago just told me she was pregnant Original post: https://www.reddit.com/r/legaladvice/comments/zuccqp/a_fling_from_7_months_ago_just_told_me_she_was/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf Updating here because previous post was locked. I just had a consultation with an Oklahoma attorney specializing in child custody. It seems like I have a few options, but none of them are ideal. I also had a phone conversation with the mother, and I recorded it, and there are a lot of concerns I have after speaking with her. Starting with my phone call… the mother did not budge on her being pregnant. I did not believe her at first, but she never backed down it. She also never backed down on that I was the father, though she often evaded in any straight forward responses and I still have my doubts. She texted me an image of a sonogram. I reverse image searched the sonogram, and didn’t find any matches, though tbh I’m still new and unsure on how to do it accurately. I couldn’t tell if the sonogram was on thermal paper or cardboard paper, idk. The GA age of the baby that was marked on the sonogram matches up with when we last slept together. She is still denying me a prenatal paternity test. So I won’t know the truth until after the baby is born. She still wants to give the baby up for adoption. When I expressed my desire to raise the child myself, she became very combative… “you would take my baby away from me!?”… so I think if it comes down to a non adoption case scenario, she is going to fight me for custody. I think she’s mentally unwell, and was unstable before the pregnancy, and I am in a better place to raise a young one. There was also some concerning explosions that she had on the recorded phone call. But it doesn’t seem like Oklahoma sees her mental state as a way to relieve custody. About my consultation with the attorney, it seems Oklahoma is a state that heavily favors the mother in all aspects of custody. If I fought for custody, then she would likely have to have the baby for the first year due to nursing. I don’t think she would want to give up the baby after that. It seems like my best road forward to get custody for the child is to start providing a paper trail of my interest in her pregnancy. This would need to start with me serving her a request to a paternity test. This would also halt any adoption proceedings. My attorney made it clear that my rights as a father diminish exponentially after the baby is born so I need to act now if I want custody. However, since I live in a different state (Kentucky) custody battles would heavily favor the mother. My first question: would having a recorded verbal or written agreement to a paternity test after birth from her serve as a paper trail to show my interest in the child? It’s going to be $1500 to serve her, which isn’t the end of the world, but I don’t have a ton of money and need to start saving for a baby and future litigations. It’s going to be either $225/ hour or $300/hour to pursue future disputes after serving her. How many hours do you all foresee a case like this going if it gets messy? My second question: the attorney mentioned some disqualifying factors that may result in her losing custody of the child. But because Oklahoma favors the mom, it seemed like it would need to be extreme neglect or drug related charges to result in her losing custody. The mother still lives with her parents and they still don’t know about her pregnancy (even though she’s 7 months!?) she worries they will kick her out if they found out. Would homelessness be a disqualification? She would probably live with a friend if this happened so I doubt she’d be on the streets, but I’m just curious about how deep the disqualifications go. My third question: if the mother gave up the child for adoption without my signature and without my current intervention. The father was just a John Doe… well, how could I learn about the child in the future? If the child was safe and loved with adopted parents then I wouldn’t want to interfere but I would want to know about them and would want to have some kind of relationship even if it’s a distant one. Thanks, for everyone’s advice and messages. Let’s try not to get this post locked out this time :) | j1rd7ec | j1upytg | 1,672,085,520 | 1,672,154,860 | 6 | 8 | With a note that I know nothing about this firm and am not recommending them, this blog post will tell you pretty much everything you need to know. Pay special attention to the putative father registry portion. That's the key for you. http://www.bulleighlaw.com/contact-us/adoption-services/putative-father | I am not a lawyer: You should listen to your lawyer (please ignore anyone who says otherwise). However, you should ask your lawyer about mediation. In other words: see if you can get legal mediation on the future child’s custody with the mother. And make it a contract binding her to the custody regardless of her feelings. Make it clear she will have no contact with you or the child. Do not give in on this aspect of the terms. This woman is not someone you want in your or your child’s life. For approaching the mother, I’d suggest you give her a time and date to meet for mediation. I have a feeling she will jump at this opportunity to meet with you. There, speak only through your lawyer. Make it clear to your lawyer this woman is likely (allegedly in my opinion) a stalker and you have no interest in engaging with her directly. Ignore any outbursts she has. Stay quiet. Become a rock. Let your lawyer advocate for your interests on your behalf. And most importantly: Stop. Calling. Her. All contact needs to be by lawyer only. You are encouraging her. She clearly wants the attention and that can bait you into some difficult positions legally. If she calls you, become a rock if you answer (which you should not). Give one word answers. Remind her to contact your lawyer to answer any questions. I’d also advise getting a restraining order to prove you think she’s a threat to you or the child. Mention how you believe she tampered with your condoms and offer the letters, texts and other evidence to support your claims. Good luck. | 0 | 69,340 | 1.333333 |
1ewr2y | legaladvice_train | 0.85 | My cat was about to be taken from my own front yard by Animal Control, fled to a drain near by, got pulled out by the tail, taken to the shelter, and euthanized within the next few hours. Reasons for euthanizing include the fact that she didn't have a collar, and that she was missing an eye. However, we've recently had a vet checkup where the vet stated that the cat wasn't suffering / gave us proper medication to help her. Our vet also urged us not to euthanize at the time. | ca4ilbb | ca4q4ye | 1,369,325,226 | 1,369,344,663 | 7 | 10 | Location and specific question might help. Sorry about your loss. | did you have the cat microchipped? if not (and without tags) there is really no way for animal control to know if the cat has an owner or not :/ im sorry for your loss though | 0 | 19,437 | 1.428571 |
rvwmfc | legaladvice_train | 0.97 | My dad passed a few months ago and his brothers are fighting for a chunk of his estate and belongings are they entitled to anything? My dad passed a few months ago and had left no will. He has been married to my mom for over 20 years. My dad's brother is enraged that he didn't receive anything after his death. It has come to our attention that he is going to try and fight to get any belongings and my dad's estate. Is there any way that he would be able to manage to do this successfully? | hr80in9 | hr82q22 | 1,641,309,914 | 1,641,310,811 | 40 | 94 | In the absence of a will the states laws for intestate succession will govern the estate. A portion will go to the spouse, the rest is usually divided among the children. Percentages may vary from state to state. The only way your uncle would have any claim is if your Mom and you and any siblings pre-deceased your Dad. Get a probate lawyer with litigation experience. They can tell your Uncle to kick rocks. | If there's no will, and the laws of intestate succession in your state don't mention siblings if there is a living spouse *and* children, then it is unlikely your uncle will find an atty to take the case. | 0 | 897 | 2.35 |
rvwmfc | legaladvice_train | 0.97 | My dad passed a few months ago and his brothers are fighting for a chunk of his estate and belongings are they entitled to anything? My dad passed a few months ago and had left no will. He has been married to my mom for over 20 years. My dad's brother is enraged that he didn't receive anything after his death. It has come to our attention that he is going to try and fight to get any belongings and my dad's estate. Is there any way that he would be able to manage to do this successfully? | hr82q22 | hr80svg | 1,641,310,811 | 1,641,310,029 | 94 | 9 | If there's no will, and the laws of intestate succession in your state don't mention siblings if there is a living spouse *and* children, then it is unlikely your uncle will find an atty to take the case. | Some of this might matter based on location. Did you dad have anything that was still part of your grandparent's property? That is the only thing that I could see them having any potential claim to. For example, if your grandparents' names were on the Deed to your house then they might actually have a legitimate claim to part of that house. | 1 | 782 | 10.444444 |
rvwmfc | legaladvice_train | 0.97 | My dad passed a few months ago and his brothers are fighting for a chunk of his estate and belongings are they entitled to anything? My dad passed a few months ago and had left no will. He has been married to my mom for over 20 years. My dad's brother is enraged that he didn't receive anything after his death. It has come to our attention that he is going to try and fight to get any belongings and my dad's estate. Is there any way that he would be able to manage to do this successfully? | hr9md89 | hr8n91o | 1,641,332,313 | 1,641,318,874 | 19 | 12 | Is there any particular object that the brothers feel they are owed? Or is it just money? Just suggesting that if they feel like they are owed 'chattel' that they are able to physically take then they may just take it and dare you to sue them for it back. Now might be a good time to take a good inventory with photos and secure any property that might catch their eye. | If your parents were legally married at the time of his death his brother is probably SOL. He can contest the estate until he’s blue in the face. | 1 | 13,439 | 1.583333 |
rvwmfc | legaladvice_train | 0.97 | My dad passed a few months ago and his brothers are fighting for a chunk of his estate and belongings are they entitled to anything? My dad passed a few months ago and had left no will. He has been married to my mom for over 20 years. My dad's brother is enraged that he didn't receive anything after his death. It has come to our attention that he is going to try and fight to get any belongings and my dad's estate. Is there any way that he would be able to manage to do this successfully? | hr80svg | hr9md89 | 1,641,310,029 | 1,641,332,313 | 9 | 19 | Some of this might matter based on location. Did you dad have anything that was still part of your grandparent's property? That is the only thing that I could see them having any potential claim to. For example, if your grandparents' names were on the Deed to your house then they might actually have a legitimate claim to part of that house. | Is there any particular object that the brothers feel they are owed? Or is it just money? Just suggesting that if they feel like they are owed 'chattel' that they are able to physically take then they may just take it and dare you to sue them for it back. Now might be a good time to take a good inventory with photos and secure any property that might catch their eye. | 0 | 22,284 | 2.111111 |
rvwmfc | legaladvice_train | 0.97 | My dad passed a few months ago and his brothers are fighting for a chunk of his estate and belongings are they entitled to anything? My dad passed a few months ago and had left no will. He has been married to my mom for over 20 years. My dad's brother is enraged that he didn't receive anything after his death. It has come to our attention that he is going to try and fight to get any belongings and my dad's estate. Is there any way that he would be able to manage to do this successfully? | hr8n91o | hr80svg | 1,641,318,874 | 1,641,310,029 | 12 | 9 | If your parents were legally married at the time of his death his brother is probably SOL. He can contest the estate until he’s blue in the face. | Some of this might matter based on location. Did you dad have anything that was still part of your grandparent's property? That is the only thing that I could see them having any potential claim to. For example, if your grandparents' names were on the Deed to your house then they might actually have a legitimate claim to part of that house. | 1 | 8,845 | 1.333333 |
rvwmfc | legaladvice_train | 0.97 | My dad passed a few months ago and his brothers are fighting for a chunk of his estate and belongings are they entitled to anything? My dad passed a few months ago and had left no will. He has been married to my mom for over 20 years. My dad's brother is enraged that he didn't receive anything after his death. It has come to our attention that he is going to try and fight to get any belongings and my dad's estate. Is there any way that he would be able to manage to do this successfully? | hr9tcik | hr9uo8j | 1,641,335,017 | 1,641,335,534 | 4 | 9 | Are the ‘belongings’ of a sentimental nature? Ask them, might be stuff that has no value to you, but they have an emotional connection to. You might find yourselves thrilled to be rid if it. | I am not a lawyer. I am sorry for your loss. Your father was legally married to your mother at the time of his death. Your father had living children at the time of his death. These are the people that are the primary beneficiaries of his estate, absent a will. If your father had died unmarried and childless, without a will, his parents would be the beneficiaries of his estate. If your father had died unmarried and childless, without a will, after his parents had died, then, and only then, would his siblings have a claim on his estate. Your uncle may be grieving and this angry greed is his way of manifesting his grief. That's unfortunate because the Michigan court system will not help him. If you or your mother get served with an actual lawsuit from a Michigan court, hire a probate attorney immediately. You may actually want to hire one anyway just to get his estate wound up legally and above board. | 0 | 517 | 2.25 |
rvwmfc | legaladvice_train | 0.97 | My dad passed a few months ago and his brothers are fighting for a chunk of his estate and belongings are they entitled to anything? My dad passed a few months ago and had left no will. He has been married to my mom for over 20 years. My dad's brother is enraged that he didn't receive anything after his death. It has come to our attention that he is going to try and fight to get any belongings and my dad's estate. Is there any way that he would be able to manage to do this successfully? | hr9tcik | hrarihq | 1,641,335,017 | 1,641,348,968 | 4 | 6 | Are the ‘belongings’ of a sentimental nature? Ask them, might be stuff that has no value to you, but they have an emotional connection to. You might find yourselves thrilled to be rid if it. | Not a lawyer - Losing your dad is difficult. Sorry for your loss. Here is a link that has a table that explains pretty much who get what... * https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/intestate-succession-michigan.html Here is a link that explains the probate process without a will. The second link has an excellent easy to follow flow chart that describes who gets what. * https://michiganlegalhelp.org/self-help-tools/wills-life-planning/overview-of-informal-probate * https://seanjnichols.com/blog/probate/michigan-probate-rules/ | 0 | 13,951 | 1.5 |
7n0yjs | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | My 70 year old mother who has major dental anxiety went in to have a simple mold procedure done...(the kind I’ve had for whitening trays)...The Dentist came in to remove it ,usually just a simple removal and they pop out. Well....apparently the person who mixed this must have used permanent cement. The next hour consisted of a very upset dentist trying to remove this thing, popping her jaw in and out, my mother in a full panic attack crying from pain, her lip was cut in several places, and finally he ended up drilling the heck out of this thing to remove it. My distraught mother was given no explanation or apology,..and in shock pays the 700 dollar bill and leaves. She has to travel three hours to get to her provider because she has K.P. Needless to say, I’m livid. Not sure what to do but mistakes like this shouldn’t happen. Thank you | dry7f0f | drybyjj | 1,514,633,159 | 1,514,643,906 | 203 | 674 | Disclaimer not a lawyer. First thing first- make sure your mom is ok. Get medical treatment, etc and make sure there are not any lasting effects. I would suggest a consultation with another dentist to do a thorough examination- all that yanking on her teeth may have caused some damage. Also get the jaw checked out. Health comes first here - the rest later. Next, figure out how much all this costs once she is 100%. Go back to original dentist and ask to be reimbursed for the expenses and also for the original $700 which clearly were for services not provided. (I cannot believe they had the audacity to charge her after this mistake). It sounds like she is ok but shaken up, so if the dentist does not cooperate then you should be below the small claims limit in your area (edit: assuming you’re in the USA, you didn’t provide a location which matters). I’m sorry this happened to your mother, this sounds traumatic. From a legal perspective I don’t think you have very much in actual damages. Again, not a lawyer, just my personal advice. | Malpractice law is pretty much the hardest area for a amateur to give useful advice. Its takes both expertise in medical and legal fields. She should consult a malpractice attorney to see if she has a case. 99% of the answers you get on this will be pure speculation and what "sounds right" | 0 | 10,747 | 3.320197 |
7n0yjs | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | My 70 year old mother who has major dental anxiety went in to have a simple mold procedure done...(the kind I’ve had for whitening trays)...The Dentist came in to remove it ,usually just a simple removal and they pop out. Well....apparently the person who mixed this must have used permanent cement. The next hour consisted of a very upset dentist trying to remove this thing, popping her jaw in and out, my mother in a full panic attack crying from pain, her lip was cut in several places, and finally he ended up drilling the heck out of this thing to remove it. My distraught mother was given no explanation or apology,..and in shock pays the 700 dollar bill and leaves. She has to travel three hours to get to her provider because she has K.P. Needless to say, I’m livid. Not sure what to do but mistakes like this shouldn’t happen. Thank you | dry7f0f | dryevhv | 1,514,633,159 | 1,514,648,456 | 203 | 409 | Disclaimer not a lawyer. First thing first- make sure your mom is ok. Get medical treatment, etc and make sure there are not any lasting effects. I would suggest a consultation with another dentist to do a thorough examination- all that yanking on her teeth may have caused some damage. Also get the jaw checked out. Health comes first here - the rest later. Next, figure out how much all this costs once she is 100%. Go back to original dentist and ask to be reimbursed for the expenses and also for the original $700 which clearly were for services not provided. (I cannot believe they had the audacity to charge her after this mistake). It sounds like she is ok but shaken up, so if the dentist does not cooperate then you should be below the small claims limit in your area (edit: assuming you’re in the USA, you didn’t provide a location which matters). I’m sorry this happened to your mother, this sounds traumatic. From a legal perspective I don’t think you have very much in actual damages. Again, not a lawyer, just my personal advice. | Dentist here. First, it sounds like we are getting a limited view of the situation in regards to the $700 charge. She either had a balance or it is payment for whatever treatment is planned. No one would charge for work not done. To explain what happened: it sounds like your mom had impressions taken with a rigid impression material that yields a very accurate final impression. This is not the same material used for making bleaching trays/nightguards/retainers. Is she getting a partial denture? While extremely rare, this can sometimes happen when the impression material gets stuck around teeth. It has happened to me and I promise I did not commit malpractice. That being said, it definitely sucks for all involved. I also had to drill off the impression tray. I guarantee it was *not* permanent cement. Your mom may be upset and I would encourage her to seek treatment with a dentist she trusts and feels comfortable with. It is ok if it's not this particular dentist but you will have troubles persuing a malpractice case for something like this. | 0 | 15,297 | 2.014778 |
7n0yjs | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | My 70 year old mother who has major dental anxiety went in to have a simple mold procedure done...(the kind I’ve had for whitening trays)...The Dentist came in to remove it ,usually just a simple removal and they pop out. Well....apparently the person who mixed this must have used permanent cement. The next hour consisted of a very upset dentist trying to remove this thing, popping her jaw in and out, my mother in a full panic attack crying from pain, her lip was cut in several places, and finally he ended up drilling the heck out of this thing to remove it. My distraught mother was given no explanation or apology,..and in shock pays the 700 dollar bill and leaves. She has to travel three hours to get to her provider because she has K.P. Needless to say, I’m livid. Not sure what to do but mistakes like this shouldn’t happen. Thank you | dryevhv | dryeavt | 1,514,648,456 | 1,514,647,638 | 409 | 14 | Dentist here. First, it sounds like we are getting a limited view of the situation in regards to the $700 charge. She either had a balance or it is payment for whatever treatment is planned. No one would charge for work not done. To explain what happened: it sounds like your mom had impressions taken with a rigid impression material that yields a very accurate final impression. This is not the same material used for making bleaching trays/nightguards/retainers. Is she getting a partial denture? While extremely rare, this can sometimes happen when the impression material gets stuck around teeth. It has happened to me and I promise I did not commit malpractice. That being said, it definitely sucks for all involved. I also had to drill off the impression tray. I guarantee it was *not* permanent cement. Your mom may be upset and I would encourage her to seek treatment with a dentist she trusts and feels comfortable with. It is ok if it's not this particular dentist but you will have troubles persuing a malpractice case for something like this. | This isn't legal advice but something to consider for the future. I hate and fear dental work to the point where I get nitrous oxide for a teeth cleaning. Your mom needs to explain this to any potential new dentist she sees. She may need to talk to several before finding a good fit. | 1 | 818 | 29.214286 |
x2bfwn | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | I loaned an employee some money to get his car fixed because we were busy at work and I needed him to work. He started paying me back weekly because he couldn't afford the total of the repair all at once. Then a few weeks later he disappeared. No call. No show. No answer on the phone. Just vanished. Do I have any legal recourse to get that money back? Stupidly I didn't put any payback or loan agreement in writing. | imicwyc | imj4w3h | 1,661,946,252 | 1,661,958,782 | 85 | 121 | What is your location? | With no job and probably no money, it's likely he is judgement proof as you cannot get blood from a stone. Likely, any written agreement between you would not have helped a whole lot, since you would of course have evidence of the payment to him anyway. If you knew anything about the vehicle or could find out thru motor vehicles where he is, you may be able to go after the car that you paid the repairs for. Otherwise, I doubt this guy has any assets. you were a good person to do what you did. I hope you can at least "pay yourself" in self respect for being a kind and helpful person to someone who needed it, even though they turned out to be trash. | 0 | 12,530 | 1.423529 |
851bfk | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | My family abandoned me after I was disabled but now that my sister's pregnant they want me to be the guardian in case they die. (PA) So, I posted about this on another sub and they suggested I check with the sub about what I can do in this situation. About three years ago when I was in an accident – a severe car accident that resulted in a brain injury, my right leg needing to be amputated at the knee, as well as limb salvage surgery on my left leg (I'm really looking at just amputating this one too since it doesn't work properly). My husband and best friend were the only ones who showed up at the hospital after the accident happened. I understand that we lived 4 hours away at the time but I nearly died, my mom even bitched at my husband for waking her up at 2 am when he was trying tell her that I survived emergency surgery. Even when I was transferred to a long-term rehabilitation facility back near my hometown no one but husband and our friends visited. I couldn’t even get my parents or my sister to occasionally drive me to physical and speech therapy after I was home, I couldn’t drive because of seizures and vision problems. So we’re kind of estranged, I’ve seen them like a couple times at most in the last year. But now I’m getting calls, voicemails and emails inviting me to all these baby related events – my mother and grandmother even dropped by to ask if I’d be helping them prepare a baby shower and buy the cake. Then they dropped the bomb on me – since I’m my pregnant sister’s only sibling they’re putting me and husband as the child’s guardian in their will once it’s born. Like I’m broke as fuck because medical bills are fucking expensive, I can’t work and my SSDI hasn’t gone through (I was actually denied the first time so I have to hire an attorney now) so it’s just my poor husband working his ass off. I also just don’t want to raise this child if something should happen, for a variety of reasons. What if they put me in their will for the child, how do I deal with that? I mean it's kind of a dick move if they both die in some freak accident, which I know is totally possible, if I don't take the child it would go to my aging parents (who weren't exactly parents of the year) or it would go to foster care. Is there any way to prevent them from putting me in their will – I want nothing from them and definitely am not capable of raising their child. | dvuf6sq | dvu6bjf | 1,521,291,630 | 1,521,269,489 | 561 | 152 | Could it be that your family thinks you are getting a large settlement due to the accident? like suddenly you are now an appropriate guardian because of your bank account? | Frankly, you have no legal or moral obligation to take the child in if your sister and BIL die. They can write it into their will until their fingers shrivel up and fall off, it won't hold up. Courts aren't going to look at it and go "well, Jenny wanted her sister Jane to take the baby in if this ever happened, so that baby belongs to Jane now!" Like another poster said, if the unlikely happens you'll be considered as a guardian option, but if you say no that should be the end of it. | 1 | 22,141 | 3.690789 |
851bfk | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | My family abandoned me after I was disabled but now that my sister's pregnant they want me to be the guardian in case they die. (PA) So, I posted about this on another sub and they suggested I check with the sub about what I can do in this situation. About three years ago when I was in an accident – a severe car accident that resulted in a brain injury, my right leg needing to be amputated at the knee, as well as limb salvage surgery on my left leg (I'm really looking at just amputating this one too since it doesn't work properly). My husband and best friend were the only ones who showed up at the hospital after the accident happened. I understand that we lived 4 hours away at the time but I nearly died, my mom even bitched at my husband for waking her up at 2 am when he was trying tell her that I survived emergency surgery. Even when I was transferred to a long-term rehabilitation facility back near my hometown no one but husband and our friends visited. I couldn’t even get my parents or my sister to occasionally drive me to physical and speech therapy after I was home, I couldn’t drive because of seizures and vision problems. So we’re kind of estranged, I’ve seen them like a couple times at most in the last year. But now I’m getting calls, voicemails and emails inviting me to all these baby related events – my mother and grandmother even dropped by to ask if I’d be helping them prepare a baby shower and buy the cake. Then they dropped the bomb on me – since I’m my pregnant sister’s only sibling they’re putting me and husband as the child’s guardian in their will once it’s born. Like I’m broke as fuck because medical bills are fucking expensive, I can’t work and my SSDI hasn’t gone through (I was actually denied the first time so I have to hire an attorney now) so it’s just my poor husband working his ass off. I also just don’t want to raise this child if something should happen, for a variety of reasons. What if they put me in their will for the child, how do I deal with that? I mean it's kind of a dick move if they both die in some freak accident, which I know is totally possible, if I don't take the child it would go to my aging parents (who weren't exactly parents of the year) or it would go to foster care. Is there any way to prevent them from putting me in their will – I want nothing from them and definitely am not capable of raising their child. | dvuf6sq | dvu04ww | 1,521,291,630 | 1,521,258,931 | 561 | 77 | Could it be that your family thinks you are getting a large settlement due to the accident? like suddenly you are now an appropriate guardian because of your bank account? | You have no obligation to take responsibility for children that aren't your own. Even if they stipulate that they want custody to pass to you, you're not required to accept it. They would then either go to another family member or family friend who wants custody or would go into the system. An option you may want to consider is, if they want the children to go to family members and you're not outright against it, have them get life insurance policies that pay out to a trust established for the care of the children. This would give you the financial ability to care for them as well as allow the children to stay together and with family rather than entering the system. But that's a personal choice you and your husband have to make. | 1 | 32,699 | 7.285714 |
851bfk | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | My family abandoned me after I was disabled but now that my sister's pregnant they want me to be the guardian in case they die. (PA) So, I posted about this on another sub and they suggested I check with the sub about what I can do in this situation. About three years ago when I was in an accident – a severe car accident that resulted in a brain injury, my right leg needing to be amputated at the knee, as well as limb salvage surgery on my left leg (I'm really looking at just amputating this one too since it doesn't work properly). My husband and best friend were the only ones who showed up at the hospital after the accident happened. I understand that we lived 4 hours away at the time but I nearly died, my mom even bitched at my husband for waking her up at 2 am when he was trying tell her that I survived emergency surgery. Even when I was transferred to a long-term rehabilitation facility back near my hometown no one but husband and our friends visited. I couldn’t even get my parents or my sister to occasionally drive me to physical and speech therapy after I was home, I couldn’t drive because of seizures and vision problems. So we’re kind of estranged, I’ve seen them like a couple times at most in the last year. But now I’m getting calls, voicemails and emails inviting me to all these baby related events – my mother and grandmother even dropped by to ask if I’d be helping them prepare a baby shower and buy the cake. Then they dropped the bomb on me – since I’m my pregnant sister’s only sibling they’re putting me and husband as the child’s guardian in their will once it’s born. Like I’m broke as fuck because medical bills are fucking expensive, I can’t work and my SSDI hasn’t gone through (I was actually denied the first time so I have to hire an attorney now) so it’s just my poor husband working his ass off. I also just don’t want to raise this child if something should happen, for a variety of reasons. What if they put me in their will for the child, how do I deal with that? I mean it's kind of a dick move if they both die in some freak accident, which I know is totally possible, if I don't take the child it would go to my aging parents (who weren't exactly parents of the year) or it would go to foster care. Is there any way to prevent them from putting me in their will – I want nothing from them and definitely am not capable of raising their child. | dvvl3e5 | dvu6bjf | 1,521,342,706 | 1,521,269,489 | 335 | 152 | I hope the mods let this stay, as it is only tangentially legal advice. It’s more advice on the disability. I suddenly became disabled a few years ago (at 25), and I work with people in similar situations. First off, it is absolutely normal to be turned down for SSDI and have to hire an attorney. Don’t let that hit you down at all, it happens to like 3/4 of cases. In addition, TBI is very hard to prove. I have a friend with a TBi in the process right now. You need to find a local attorney who has time to meet with you in person. For the love of all that is holy don’t call a national attorney. Between now and then, go to all your doctors appointments and be sure to go in if you’re even worried about something: it’s all ammo in the ALJ hearing. Second, I was talking about how expensive disability is just this morning. It costs about $3,300/month if you live alone, are in a wheelchair, and need a wheelchair van . I assume you know what your SSDI payment will be and can see the problem there. Those costs never go away, they just go down a bit, so take that into account when planning. Obviously I don’t know your situation with your leg, but if you can still walk on it at all you need to really, really think about the amputation. Obviously you’ve been told that, but I have a different POV. Of course life in a wheelchair is hard, but you get used to it. It’s really not that different at the end of the day. However, it is *EXTREMELY* expensive. My power wheelchair was $45,000 — there is a deductible for DMG you have to pay, and a co-pay, frequently $5-6k but it all depends on your insurance. If your husband isn’t “handy” and you have any steps up to your front door, you’ll also be paying a small fortune for a wheelchair ramp. And permanent ramps are supposed to be one foot long for every one inch in height. More than 8” up to your front door and you’re gonna die when you hear the estimate. You’ll also eventually need your bathtub replaced, as well as your countertops all throughout the house. You can avoid the countertops but by paying ~$5,000 more (generally out of pocket) for your wheelchair to have a lift function. Even if it’s just the bathroom, house demolition and refinishing in a custom (accessible) way is way more expensive than most people think. You’ll need a new oven, possibly a new dish washer, all that stuff if you can still help out in the house. The kicker, though, is the wheelchair van. A $26,000 Chrysler, after being fitted to carry a wheelchair, sells for about $60,000. That’s $1,200/month. Buy used you say? It takes them almost 10 years to drop back to their original retail price. Can you imagine paying $20k for a 2008 minivan? That isn’t even the worst part, though: the gear for the ramp is only intended to last for 5 years before it is supposed to be removed entirely, have all the consumables replaced, be cleaned, etc., at a cost of major bank. Most people don’t have this done, because it will last past this date and they’ll sell the van anyway. So that 10 year old van may have its lift crap out next week, and you’ll have to invest another $5k — cash — to get it working again. So, like I said, if you can still bear weight on that leg, consider those costs. Obviously if it’s better to have it removed, do so, but keep in mind the upcoming costs. Having a leg to use as a pivot to transfer into bed/the tub/the car is a godsend, and will save you a fortune every year. Are you doing okay emotionally? I have some advice I share with the people I talk to about how to get back on track mentally after becoming disabled, but I don’t want to overstep if you have everything under control. Your post makes it sound like you probably do. I hope you keep doing well. I won’t tell you to reach out if you need anything, because that is strictly against the rules here, but I *am* on reddit a lot. | Frankly, you have no legal or moral obligation to take the child in if your sister and BIL die. They can write it into their will until their fingers shrivel up and fall off, it won't hold up. Courts aren't going to look at it and go "well, Jenny wanted her sister Jane to take the baby in if this ever happened, so that baby belongs to Jane now!" Like another poster said, if the unlikely happens you'll be considered as a guardian option, but if you say no that should be the end of it. | 1 | 73,217 | 2.203947 |
851bfk | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | My family abandoned me after I was disabled but now that my sister's pregnant they want me to be the guardian in case they die. (PA) So, I posted about this on another sub and they suggested I check with the sub about what I can do in this situation. About three years ago when I was in an accident – a severe car accident that resulted in a brain injury, my right leg needing to be amputated at the knee, as well as limb salvage surgery on my left leg (I'm really looking at just amputating this one too since it doesn't work properly). My husband and best friend were the only ones who showed up at the hospital after the accident happened. I understand that we lived 4 hours away at the time but I nearly died, my mom even bitched at my husband for waking her up at 2 am when he was trying tell her that I survived emergency surgery. Even when I was transferred to a long-term rehabilitation facility back near my hometown no one but husband and our friends visited. I couldn’t even get my parents or my sister to occasionally drive me to physical and speech therapy after I was home, I couldn’t drive because of seizures and vision problems. So we’re kind of estranged, I’ve seen them like a couple times at most in the last year. But now I’m getting calls, voicemails and emails inviting me to all these baby related events – my mother and grandmother even dropped by to ask if I’d be helping them prepare a baby shower and buy the cake. Then they dropped the bomb on me – since I’m my pregnant sister’s only sibling they’re putting me and husband as the child’s guardian in their will once it’s born. Like I’m broke as fuck because medical bills are fucking expensive, I can’t work and my SSDI hasn’t gone through (I was actually denied the first time so I have to hire an attorney now) so it’s just my poor husband working his ass off. I also just don’t want to raise this child if something should happen, for a variety of reasons. What if they put me in their will for the child, how do I deal with that? I mean it's kind of a dick move if they both die in some freak accident, which I know is totally possible, if I don't take the child it would go to my aging parents (who weren't exactly parents of the year) or it would go to foster care. Is there any way to prevent them from putting me in their will – I want nothing from them and definitely am not capable of raising their child. | dvvl3e5 | dvu04ww | 1,521,342,706 | 1,521,258,931 | 335 | 77 | I hope the mods let this stay, as it is only tangentially legal advice. It’s more advice on the disability. I suddenly became disabled a few years ago (at 25), and I work with people in similar situations. First off, it is absolutely normal to be turned down for SSDI and have to hire an attorney. Don’t let that hit you down at all, it happens to like 3/4 of cases. In addition, TBI is very hard to prove. I have a friend with a TBi in the process right now. You need to find a local attorney who has time to meet with you in person. For the love of all that is holy don’t call a national attorney. Between now and then, go to all your doctors appointments and be sure to go in if you’re even worried about something: it’s all ammo in the ALJ hearing. Second, I was talking about how expensive disability is just this morning. It costs about $3,300/month if you live alone, are in a wheelchair, and need a wheelchair van . I assume you know what your SSDI payment will be and can see the problem there. Those costs never go away, they just go down a bit, so take that into account when planning. Obviously I don’t know your situation with your leg, but if you can still walk on it at all you need to really, really think about the amputation. Obviously you’ve been told that, but I have a different POV. Of course life in a wheelchair is hard, but you get used to it. It’s really not that different at the end of the day. However, it is *EXTREMELY* expensive. My power wheelchair was $45,000 — there is a deductible for DMG you have to pay, and a co-pay, frequently $5-6k but it all depends on your insurance. If your husband isn’t “handy” and you have any steps up to your front door, you’ll also be paying a small fortune for a wheelchair ramp. And permanent ramps are supposed to be one foot long for every one inch in height. More than 8” up to your front door and you’re gonna die when you hear the estimate. You’ll also eventually need your bathtub replaced, as well as your countertops all throughout the house. You can avoid the countertops but by paying ~$5,000 more (generally out of pocket) for your wheelchair to have a lift function. Even if it’s just the bathroom, house demolition and refinishing in a custom (accessible) way is way more expensive than most people think. You’ll need a new oven, possibly a new dish washer, all that stuff if you can still help out in the house. The kicker, though, is the wheelchair van. A $26,000 Chrysler, after being fitted to carry a wheelchair, sells for about $60,000. That’s $1,200/month. Buy used you say? It takes them almost 10 years to drop back to their original retail price. Can you imagine paying $20k for a 2008 minivan? That isn’t even the worst part, though: the gear for the ramp is only intended to last for 5 years before it is supposed to be removed entirely, have all the consumables replaced, be cleaned, etc., at a cost of major bank. Most people don’t have this done, because it will last past this date and they’ll sell the van anyway. So that 10 year old van may have its lift crap out next week, and you’ll have to invest another $5k — cash — to get it working again. So, like I said, if you can still bear weight on that leg, consider those costs. Obviously if it’s better to have it removed, do so, but keep in mind the upcoming costs. Having a leg to use as a pivot to transfer into bed/the tub/the car is a godsend, and will save you a fortune every year. Are you doing okay emotionally? I have some advice I share with the people I talk to about how to get back on track mentally after becoming disabled, but I don’t want to overstep if you have everything under control. Your post makes it sound like you probably do. I hope you keep doing well. I won’t tell you to reach out if you need anything, because that is strictly against the rules here, but I *am* on reddit a lot. | You have no obligation to take responsibility for children that aren't your own. Even if they stipulate that they want custody to pass to you, you're not required to accept it. They would then either go to another family member or family friend who wants custody or would go into the system. An option you may want to consider is, if they want the children to go to family members and you're not outright against it, have them get life insurance policies that pay out to a trust established for the care of the children. This would give you the financial ability to care for them as well as allow the children to stay together and with family rather than entering the system. But that's a personal choice you and your husband have to make. | 1 | 83,775 | 4.350649 |
851bfk | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | My family abandoned me after I was disabled but now that my sister's pregnant they want me to be the guardian in case they die. (PA) So, I posted about this on another sub and they suggested I check with the sub about what I can do in this situation. About three years ago when I was in an accident – a severe car accident that resulted in a brain injury, my right leg needing to be amputated at the knee, as well as limb salvage surgery on my left leg (I'm really looking at just amputating this one too since it doesn't work properly). My husband and best friend were the only ones who showed up at the hospital after the accident happened. I understand that we lived 4 hours away at the time but I nearly died, my mom even bitched at my husband for waking her up at 2 am when he was trying tell her that I survived emergency surgery. Even when I was transferred to a long-term rehabilitation facility back near my hometown no one but husband and our friends visited. I couldn’t even get my parents or my sister to occasionally drive me to physical and speech therapy after I was home, I couldn’t drive because of seizures and vision problems. So we’re kind of estranged, I’ve seen them like a couple times at most in the last year. But now I’m getting calls, voicemails and emails inviting me to all these baby related events – my mother and grandmother even dropped by to ask if I’d be helping them prepare a baby shower and buy the cake. Then they dropped the bomb on me – since I’m my pregnant sister’s only sibling they’re putting me and husband as the child’s guardian in their will once it’s born. Like I’m broke as fuck because medical bills are fucking expensive, I can’t work and my SSDI hasn’t gone through (I was actually denied the first time so I have to hire an attorney now) so it’s just my poor husband working his ass off. I also just don’t want to raise this child if something should happen, for a variety of reasons. What if they put me in their will for the child, how do I deal with that? I mean it's kind of a dick move if they both die in some freak accident, which I know is totally possible, if I don't take the child it would go to my aging parents (who weren't exactly parents of the year) or it would go to foster care. Is there any way to prevent them from putting me in their will – I want nothing from them and definitely am not capable of raising their child. | dvvl3e5 | dvv14jr | 1,521,342,706 | 1,521,318,382 | 335 | 25 | I hope the mods let this stay, as it is only tangentially legal advice. It’s more advice on the disability. I suddenly became disabled a few years ago (at 25), and I work with people in similar situations. First off, it is absolutely normal to be turned down for SSDI and have to hire an attorney. Don’t let that hit you down at all, it happens to like 3/4 of cases. In addition, TBI is very hard to prove. I have a friend with a TBi in the process right now. You need to find a local attorney who has time to meet with you in person. For the love of all that is holy don’t call a national attorney. Between now and then, go to all your doctors appointments and be sure to go in if you’re even worried about something: it’s all ammo in the ALJ hearing. Second, I was talking about how expensive disability is just this morning. It costs about $3,300/month if you live alone, are in a wheelchair, and need a wheelchair van . I assume you know what your SSDI payment will be and can see the problem there. Those costs never go away, they just go down a bit, so take that into account when planning. Obviously I don’t know your situation with your leg, but if you can still walk on it at all you need to really, really think about the amputation. Obviously you’ve been told that, but I have a different POV. Of course life in a wheelchair is hard, but you get used to it. It’s really not that different at the end of the day. However, it is *EXTREMELY* expensive. My power wheelchair was $45,000 — there is a deductible for DMG you have to pay, and a co-pay, frequently $5-6k but it all depends on your insurance. If your husband isn’t “handy” and you have any steps up to your front door, you’ll also be paying a small fortune for a wheelchair ramp. And permanent ramps are supposed to be one foot long for every one inch in height. More than 8” up to your front door and you’re gonna die when you hear the estimate. You’ll also eventually need your bathtub replaced, as well as your countertops all throughout the house. You can avoid the countertops but by paying ~$5,000 more (generally out of pocket) for your wheelchair to have a lift function. Even if it’s just the bathroom, house demolition and refinishing in a custom (accessible) way is way more expensive than most people think. You’ll need a new oven, possibly a new dish washer, all that stuff if you can still help out in the house. The kicker, though, is the wheelchair van. A $26,000 Chrysler, after being fitted to carry a wheelchair, sells for about $60,000. That’s $1,200/month. Buy used you say? It takes them almost 10 years to drop back to their original retail price. Can you imagine paying $20k for a 2008 minivan? That isn’t even the worst part, though: the gear for the ramp is only intended to last for 5 years before it is supposed to be removed entirely, have all the consumables replaced, be cleaned, etc., at a cost of major bank. Most people don’t have this done, because it will last past this date and they’ll sell the van anyway. So that 10 year old van may have its lift crap out next week, and you’ll have to invest another $5k — cash — to get it working again. So, like I said, if you can still bear weight on that leg, consider those costs. Obviously if it’s better to have it removed, do so, but keep in mind the upcoming costs. Having a leg to use as a pivot to transfer into bed/the tub/the car is a godsend, and will save you a fortune every year. Are you doing okay emotionally? I have some advice I share with the people I talk to about how to get back on track mentally after becoming disabled, but I don’t want to overstep if you have everything under control. Your post makes it sound like you probably do. I hope you keep doing well. I won’t tell you to reach out if you need anything, because that is strictly against the rules here, but I *am* on reddit a lot. | "No" is a complete sentence, and they cannot compel you to do this. | 1 | 24,324 | 13.4 |
851bfk | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | My family abandoned me after I was disabled but now that my sister's pregnant they want me to be the guardian in case they die. (PA) So, I posted about this on another sub and they suggested I check with the sub about what I can do in this situation. About three years ago when I was in an accident – a severe car accident that resulted in a brain injury, my right leg needing to be amputated at the knee, as well as limb salvage surgery on my left leg (I'm really looking at just amputating this one too since it doesn't work properly). My husband and best friend were the only ones who showed up at the hospital after the accident happened. I understand that we lived 4 hours away at the time but I nearly died, my mom even bitched at my husband for waking her up at 2 am when he was trying tell her that I survived emergency surgery. Even when I was transferred to a long-term rehabilitation facility back near my hometown no one but husband and our friends visited. I couldn’t even get my parents or my sister to occasionally drive me to physical and speech therapy after I was home, I couldn’t drive because of seizures and vision problems. So we’re kind of estranged, I’ve seen them like a couple times at most in the last year. But now I’m getting calls, voicemails and emails inviting me to all these baby related events – my mother and grandmother even dropped by to ask if I’d be helping them prepare a baby shower and buy the cake. Then they dropped the bomb on me – since I’m my pregnant sister’s only sibling they’re putting me and husband as the child’s guardian in their will once it’s born. Like I’m broke as fuck because medical bills are fucking expensive, I can’t work and my SSDI hasn’t gone through (I was actually denied the first time so I have to hire an attorney now) so it’s just my poor husband working his ass off. I also just don’t want to raise this child if something should happen, for a variety of reasons. What if they put me in their will for the child, how do I deal with that? I mean it's kind of a dick move if they both die in some freak accident, which I know is totally possible, if I don't take the child it would go to my aging parents (who weren't exactly parents of the year) or it would go to foster care. Is there any way to prevent them from putting me in their will – I want nothing from them and definitely am not capable of raising their child. | dvvl3e5 | dvul91o | 1,521,342,706 | 1,521,300,153 | 335 | 10 | I hope the mods let this stay, as it is only tangentially legal advice. It’s more advice on the disability. I suddenly became disabled a few years ago (at 25), and I work with people in similar situations. First off, it is absolutely normal to be turned down for SSDI and have to hire an attorney. Don’t let that hit you down at all, it happens to like 3/4 of cases. In addition, TBI is very hard to prove. I have a friend with a TBi in the process right now. You need to find a local attorney who has time to meet with you in person. For the love of all that is holy don’t call a national attorney. Between now and then, go to all your doctors appointments and be sure to go in if you’re even worried about something: it’s all ammo in the ALJ hearing. Second, I was talking about how expensive disability is just this morning. It costs about $3,300/month if you live alone, are in a wheelchair, and need a wheelchair van . I assume you know what your SSDI payment will be and can see the problem there. Those costs never go away, they just go down a bit, so take that into account when planning. Obviously I don’t know your situation with your leg, but if you can still walk on it at all you need to really, really think about the amputation. Obviously you’ve been told that, but I have a different POV. Of course life in a wheelchair is hard, but you get used to it. It’s really not that different at the end of the day. However, it is *EXTREMELY* expensive. My power wheelchair was $45,000 — there is a deductible for DMG you have to pay, and a co-pay, frequently $5-6k but it all depends on your insurance. If your husband isn’t “handy” and you have any steps up to your front door, you’ll also be paying a small fortune for a wheelchair ramp. And permanent ramps are supposed to be one foot long for every one inch in height. More than 8” up to your front door and you’re gonna die when you hear the estimate. You’ll also eventually need your bathtub replaced, as well as your countertops all throughout the house. You can avoid the countertops but by paying ~$5,000 more (generally out of pocket) for your wheelchair to have a lift function. Even if it’s just the bathroom, house demolition and refinishing in a custom (accessible) way is way more expensive than most people think. You’ll need a new oven, possibly a new dish washer, all that stuff if you can still help out in the house. The kicker, though, is the wheelchair van. A $26,000 Chrysler, after being fitted to carry a wheelchair, sells for about $60,000. That’s $1,200/month. Buy used you say? It takes them almost 10 years to drop back to their original retail price. Can you imagine paying $20k for a 2008 minivan? That isn’t even the worst part, though: the gear for the ramp is only intended to last for 5 years before it is supposed to be removed entirely, have all the consumables replaced, be cleaned, etc., at a cost of major bank. Most people don’t have this done, because it will last past this date and they’ll sell the van anyway. So that 10 year old van may have its lift crap out next week, and you’ll have to invest another $5k — cash — to get it working again. So, like I said, if you can still bear weight on that leg, consider those costs. Obviously if it’s better to have it removed, do so, but keep in mind the upcoming costs. Having a leg to use as a pivot to transfer into bed/the tub/the car is a godsend, and will save you a fortune every year. Are you doing okay emotionally? I have some advice I share with the people I talk to about how to get back on track mentally after becoming disabled, but I don’t want to overstep if you have everything under control. Your post makes it sound like you probably do. I hope you keep doing well. I won’t tell you to reach out if you need anything, because that is strictly against the rules here, but I *am* on reddit a lot. | You cannot be legally obligated to be responsible for the child. They can write anything they want in their will, but nobody can or will force you to take a child that is not yours. | 1 | 42,553 | 33.5 |
851bfk | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | My family abandoned me after I was disabled but now that my sister's pregnant they want me to be the guardian in case they die. (PA) So, I posted about this on another sub and they suggested I check with the sub about what I can do in this situation. About three years ago when I was in an accident – a severe car accident that resulted in a brain injury, my right leg needing to be amputated at the knee, as well as limb salvage surgery on my left leg (I'm really looking at just amputating this one too since it doesn't work properly). My husband and best friend were the only ones who showed up at the hospital after the accident happened. I understand that we lived 4 hours away at the time but I nearly died, my mom even bitched at my husband for waking her up at 2 am when he was trying tell her that I survived emergency surgery. Even when I was transferred to a long-term rehabilitation facility back near my hometown no one but husband and our friends visited. I couldn’t even get my parents or my sister to occasionally drive me to physical and speech therapy after I was home, I couldn’t drive because of seizures and vision problems. So we’re kind of estranged, I’ve seen them like a couple times at most in the last year. But now I’m getting calls, voicemails and emails inviting me to all these baby related events – my mother and grandmother even dropped by to ask if I’d be helping them prepare a baby shower and buy the cake. Then they dropped the bomb on me – since I’m my pregnant sister’s only sibling they’re putting me and husband as the child’s guardian in their will once it’s born. Like I’m broke as fuck because medical bills are fucking expensive, I can’t work and my SSDI hasn’t gone through (I was actually denied the first time so I have to hire an attorney now) so it’s just my poor husband working his ass off. I also just don’t want to raise this child if something should happen, for a variety of reasons. What if they put me in their will for the child, how do I deal with that? I mean it's kind of a dick move if they both die in some freak accident, which I know is totally possible, if I don't take the child it would go to my aging parents (who weren't exactly parents of the year) or it would go to foster care. Is there any way to prevent them from putting me in their will – I want nothing from them and definitely am not capable of raising their child. | dvvl3e5 | dvvl1j5 | 1,521,342,706 | 1,521,342,636 | 335 | 6 | I hope the mods let this stay, as it is only tangentially legal advice. It’s more advice on the disability. I suddenly became disabled a few years ago (at 25), and I work with people in similar situations. First off, it is absolutely normal to be turned down for SSDI and have to hire an attorney. Don’t let that hit you down at all, it happens to like 3/4 of cases. In addition, TBI is very hard to prove. I have a friend with a TBi in the process right now. You need to find a local attorney who has time to meet with you in person. For the love of all that is holy don’t call a national attorney. Between now and then, go to all your doctors appointments and be sure to go in if you’re even worried about something: it’s all ammo in the ALJ hearing. Second, I was talking about how expensive disability is just this morning. It costs about $3,300/month if you live alone, are in a wheelchair, and need a wheelchair van . I assume you know what your SSDI payment will be and can see the problem there. Those costs never go away, they just go down a bit, so take that into account when planning. Obviously I don’t know your situation with your leg, but if you can still walk on it at all you need to really, really think about the amputation. Obviously you’ve been told that, but I have a different POV. Of course life in a wheelchair is hard, but you get used to it. It’s really not that different at the end of the day. However, it is *EXTREMELY* expensive. My power wheelchair was $45,000 — there is a deductible for DMG you have to pay, and a co-pay, frequently $5-6k but it all depends on your insurance. If your husband isn’t “handy” and you have any steps up to your front door, you’ll also be paying a small fortune for a wheelchair ramp. And permanent ramps are supposed to be one foot long for every one inch in height. More than 8” up to your front door and you’re gonna die when you hear the estimate. You’ll also eventually need your bathtub replaced, as well as your countertops all throughout the house. You can avoid the countertops but by paying ~$5,000 more (generally out of pocket) for your wheelchair to have a lift function. Even if it’s just the bathroom, house demolition and refinishing in a custom (accessible) way is way more expensive than most people think. You’ll need a new oven, possibly a new dish washer, all that stuff if you can still help out in the house. The kicker, though, is the wheelchair van. A $26,000 Chrysler, after being fitted to carry a wheelchair, sells for about $60,000. That’s $1,200/month. Buy used you say? It takes them almost 10 years to drop back to their original retail price. Can you imagine paying $20k for a 2008 minivan? That isn’t even the worst part, though: the gear for the ramp is only intended to last for 5 years before it is supposed to be removed entirely, have all the consumables replaced, be cleaned, etc., at a cost of major bank. Most people don’t have this done, because it will last past this date and they’ll sell the van anyway. So that 10 year old van may have its lift crap out next week, and you’ll have to invest another $5k — cash — to get it working again. So, like I said, if you can still bear weight on that leg, consider those costs. Obviously if it’s better to have it removed, do so, but keep in mind the upcoming costs. Having a leg to use as a pivot to transfer into bed/the tub/the car is a godsend, and will save you a fortune every year. Are you doing okay emotionally? I have some advice I share with the people I talk to about how to get back on track mentally after becoming disabled, but I don’t want to overstep if you have everything under control. Your post makes it sound like you probably do. I hope you keep doing well. I won’t tell you to reach out if you need anything, because that is strictly against the rules here, but I *am* on reddit a lot. | Tell them to eff off. Also, if things come to pass, make sure CPS knows how your parents treated you. That said, they might take the kid in with open arms because it's from your sister. (I don't get people.) | 1 | 70 | 55.833333 |
851bfk | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | My family abandoned me after I was disabled but now that my sister's pregnant they want me to be the guardian in case they die. (PA) So, I posted about this on another sub and they suggested I check with the sub about what I can do in this situation. About three years ago when I was in an accident – a severe car accident that resulted in a brain injury, my right leg needing to be amputated at the knee, as well as limb salvage surgery on my left leg (I'm really looking at just amputating this one too since it doesn't work properly). My husband and best friend were the only ones who showed up at the hospital after the accident happened. I understand that we lived 4 hours away at the time but I nearly died, my mom even bitched at my husband for waking her up at 2 am when he was trying tell her that I survived emergency surgery. Even when I was transferred to a long-term rehabilitation facility back near my hometown no one but husband and our friends visited. I couldn’t even get my parents or my sister to occasionally drive me to physical and speech therapy after I was home, I couldn’t drive because of seizures and vision problems. So we’re kind of estranged, I’ve seen them like a couple times at most in the last year. But now I’m getting calls, voicemails and emails inviting me to all these baby related events – my mother and grandmother even dropped by to ask if I’d be helping them prepare a baby shower and buy the cake. Then they dropped the bomb on me – since I’m my pregnant sister’s only sibling they’re putting me and husband as the child’s guardian in their will once it’s born. Like I’m broke as fuck because medical bills are fucking expensive, I can’t work and my SSDI hasn’t gone through (I was actually denied the first time so I have to hire an attorney now) so it’s just my poor husband working his ass off. I also just don’t want to raise this child if something should happen, for a variety of reasons. What if they put me in their will for the child, how do I deal with that? I mean it's kind of a dick move if they both die in some freak accident, which I know is totally possible, if I don't take the child it would go to my aging parents (who weren't exactly parents of the year) or it would go to foster care. Is there any way to prevent them from putting me in their will – I want nothing from them and definitely am not capable of raising their child. | dvu6bjf | dvu04ww | 1,521,269,489 | 1,521,258,931 | 152 | 77 | Frankly, you have no legal or moral obligation to take the child in if your sister and BIL die. They can write it into their will until their fingers shrivel up and fall off, it won't hold up. Courts aren't going to look at it and go "well, Jenny wanted her sister Jane to take the baby in if this ever happened, so that baby belongs to Jane now!" Like another poster said, if the unlikely happens you'll be considered as a guardian option, but if you say no that should be the end of it. | You have no obligation to take responsibility for children that aren't your own. Even if they stipulate that they want custody to pass to you, you're not required to accept it. They would then either go to another family member or family friend who wants custody or would go into the system. An option you may want to consider is, if they want the children to go to family members and you're not outright against it, have them get life insurance policies that pay out to a trust established for the care of the children. This would give you the financial ability to care for them as well as allow the children to stay together and with family rather than entering the system. But that's a personal choice you and your husband have to make. | 1 | 10,558 | 1.974026 |
851bfk | legaladvice_train | 0.98 | My family abandoned me after I was disabled but now that my sister's pregnant they want me to be the guardian in case they die. (PA) So, I posted about this on another sub and they suggested I check with the sub about what I can do in this situation. About three years ago when I was in an accident – a severe car accident that resulted in a brain injury, my right leg needing to be amputated at the knee, as well as limb salvage surgery on my left leg (I'm really looking at just amputating this one too since it doesn't work properly). My husband and best friend were the only ones who showed up at the hospital after the accident happened. I understand that we lived 4 hours away at the time but I nearly died, my mom even bitched at my husband for waking her up at 2 am when he was trying tell her that I survived emergency surgery. Even when I was transferred to a long-term rehabilitation facility back near my hometown no one but husband and our friends visited. I couldn’t even get my parents or my sister to occasionally drive me to physical and speech therapy after I was home, I couldn’t drive because of seizures and vision problems. So we’re kind of estranged, I’ve seen them like a couple times at most in the last year. But now I’m getting calls, voicemails and emails inviting me to all these baby related events – my mother and grandmother even dropped by to ask if I’d be helping them prepare a baby shower and buy the cake. Then they dropped the bomb on me – since I’m my pregnant sister’s only sibling they’re putting me and husband as the child’s guardian in their will once it’s born. Like I’m broke as fuck because medical bills are fucking expensive, I can’t work and my SSDI hasn’t gone through (I was actually denied the first time so I have to hire an attorney now) so it’s just my poor husband working his ass off. I also just don’t want to raise this child if something should happen, for a variety of reasons. What if they put me in their will for the child, how do I deal with that? I mean it's kind of a dick move if they both die in some freak accident, which I know is totally possible, if I don't take the child it would go to my aging parents (who weren't exactly parents of the year) or it would go to foster care. Is there any way to prevent them from putting me in their will – I want nothing from them and definitely am not capable of raising their child. | dvul91o | dvv14jr | 1,521,300,153 | 1,521,318,382 | 10 | 25 | You cannot be legally obligated to be responsible for the child. They can write anything they want in their will, but nobody can or will force you to take a child that is not yours. | "No" is a complete sentence, and they cannot compel you to do this. | 0 | 18,229 | 2.5 |
419fwm | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | I'm a teenager. I might be dying. Is there any way I can make sure my little sister gets some of my stuff after I die? [Canada] Hi! I'm seventeen, and to make a long story short, I've been having some medical problems for a while. We don't know for sure, but things don't necessarily look *fantastic* right now. Tests will reveal more soon, and hopefully they'll reveal that I have something simple and treatable, but they might not. I've been thinking about what will happen in the event that they don't. I don't live with my biological family. In Canada, what happens to teenagers who can't live with their families is a bit different. When you're an older teenager, like me, instead of being in a foster home you get a small amount of money from the government to cover groceries, a bus pass, and the government will pay for you to rent a room somewhere. Currently, I live in a group home with a couple of other teenagers, although I'll hopefully be moving soon. The only family I've got is my little sister, who's just over a year younger than me. I don't live with her and she's not in the care of the government. If I do die, my younger sister would be devastated. Nothing I own is worth very much, and I don't really have any savings, but I think my sister would find some sentimental value in having some of my stuff (my favourite scarf, some of my favourite books, the plush animal I've had since I was like four, etc.) I don't know what would happen to the rest of my stuff after I die--if I had to guess, the people who run the group home (if I still live here when I die) will donate it to charity or something. Is there any way I could make sure my sister had any of my stuff that she wanted? | cz0puvl | cz0nwsh | 1,452,976,625 | 1,452,973,175 | 59 | 38 | put it in a box with a note "I need you keep this stuff for me for a while" and post it to her, then you know she has it if your medical condition turns out okay then next time you see her, tell her that you thought you might not make it and you just wanted to make sure she had things of yours you thought she might want | Unfortunately you didn't specify which province and Canadia is a very large country with many provincial quirks. Regardless, according to BC and Ontario, here's the pecking order: * Legal (not common-law) spouse * Children (divided equally) * Legal (not biological, unless they are also your legal) parents * Brothers and sisters (divided equally) * Nieces and nephews, other next of kin, then the cronies in the government Generally speaking, adoption breaks the legal ties between you and your birth parents in terms of intestate succession. In your case, it depends on whether you are legally emancipated, abandoned by your parents, or whatever. You don't specify whether your parents are alive or deceased. If they're alive, they may challenge for their right to succession, but if you only have minor sentimental items, I doubt it. If they're deceased, then your possessions will automatically pass on to your brothers and sisters in equal shares - if you have no other brothers and sisters, your litter sister would inherit your entire estate. That's the legal answer. Whether the group home will bother to retain and deliver your possessions is another story. Since they are invaluable to you but otherwise not of much importance, they probably see no real risk in just donating or tossing them. So you can look into making a will, but if you are on limited fixed income and your sister would otherwise inherit everything anyway, you may not want to spend the money on one. You should talk to the management of the group home to set up some sort of informal arrangement in which they agree to hand off your possessions to your sister simply because that is the biggest risk here. A will probably won't do much to persuade them to hang onto the stuff if they don't know anything about it. Not a lot of emancipated minors draft up wills anyway. Good luck. | 1 | 3,450 | 1.552632 |
419fwm | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | I'm a teenager. I might be dying. Is there any way I can make sure my little sister gets some of my stuff after I die? [Canada] Hi! I'm seventeen, and to make a long story short, I've been having some medical problems for a while. We don't know for sure, but things don't necessarily look *fantastic* right now. Tests will reveal more soon, and hopefully they'll reveal that I have something simple and treatable, but they might not. I've been thinking about what will happen in the event that they don't. I don't live with my biological family. In Canada, what happens to teenagers who can't live with their families is a bit different. When you're an older teenager, like me, instead of being in a foster home you get a small amount of money from the government to cover groceries, a bus pass, and the government will pay for you to rent a room somewhere. Currently, I live in a group home with a couple of other teenagers, although I'll hopefully be moving soon. The only family I've got is my little sister, who's just over a year younger than me. I don't live with her and she's not in the care of the government. If I do die, my younger sister would be devastated. Nothing I own is worth very much, and I don't really have any savings, but I think my sister would find some sentimental value in having some of my stuff (my favourite scarf, some of my favourite books, the plush animal I've had since I was like four, etc.) I don't know what would happen to the rest of my stuff after I die--if I had to guess, the people who run the group home (if I still live here when I die) will donate it to charity or something. Is there any way I could make sure my sister had any of my stuff that she wanted? | cz0puvl | cz0o997 | 1,452,976,625 | 1,452,973,781 | 59 | 10 | put it in a box with a note "I need you keep this stuff for me for a while" and post it to her, then you know she has it if your medical condition turns out okay then next time you see her, tell her that you thought you might not make it and you just wanted to make sure she had things of yours you thought she might want | I am so so sorry you have to go through this. | 1 | 2,844 | 5.9 |
419fwm | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | I'm a teenager. I might be dying. Is there any way I can make sure my little sister gets some of my stuff after I die? [Canada] Hi! I'm seventeen, and to make a long story short, I've been having some medical problems for a while. We don't know for sure, but things don't necessarily look *fantastic* right now. Tests will reveal more soon, and hopefully they'll reveal that I have something simple and treatable, but they might not. I've been thinking about what will happen in the event that they don't. I don't live with my biological family. In Canada, what happens to teenagers who can't live with their families is a bit different. When you're an older teenager, like me, instead of being in a foster home you get a small amount of money from the government to cover groceries, a bus pass, and the government will pay for you to rent a room somewhere. Currently, I live in a group home with a couple of other teenagers, although I'll hopefully be moving soon. The only family I've got is my little sister, who's just over a year younger than me. I don't live with her and she's not in the care of the government. If I do die, my younger sister would be devastated. Nothing I own is worth very much, and I don't really have any savings, but I think my sister would find some sentimental value in having some of my stuff (my favourite scarf, some of my favourite books, the plush animal I've had since I was like four, etc.) I don't know what would happen to the rest of my stuff after I die--if I had to guess, the people who run the group home (if I still live here when I die) will donate it to charity or something. Is there any way I could make sure my sister had any of my stuff that she wanted? | cz0pk1u | cz0puvl | 1,452,976,079 | 1,452,976,625 | 5 | 59 | The easiest way would be to just give her that stuff while you're alive, if possible. | put it in a box with a note "I need you keep this stuff for me for a while" and post it to her, then you know she has it if your medical condition turns out okay then next time you see her, tell her that you thought you might not make it and you just wanted to make sure she had things of yours you thought she might want | 0 | 546 | 11.8 |
419fwm | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | I'm a teenager. I might be dying. Is there any way I can make sure my little sister gets some of my stuff after I die? [Canada] Hi! I'm seventeen, and to make a long story short, I've been having some medical problems for a while. We don't know for sure, but things don't necessarily look *fantastic* right now. Tests will reveal more soon, and hopefully they'll reveal that I have something simple and treatable, but they might not. I've been thinking about what will happen in the event that they don't. I don't live with my biological family. In Canada, what happens to teenagers who can't live with their families is a bit different. When you're an older teenager, like me, instead of being in a foster home you get a small amount of money from the government to cover groceries, a bus pass, and the government will pay for you to rent a room somewhere. Currently, I live in a group home with a couple of other teenagers, although I'll hopefully be moving soon. The only family I've got is my little sister, who's just over a year younger than me. I don't live with her and she's not in the care of the government. If I do die, my younger sister would be devastated. Nothing I own is worth very much, and I don't really have any savings, but I think my sister would find some sentimental value in having some of my stuff (my favourite scarf, some of my favourite books, the plush animal I've had since I was like four, etc.) I don't know what would happen to the rest of my stuff after I die--if I had to guess, the people who run the group home (if I still live here when I die) will donate it to charity or something. Is there any way I could make sure my sister had any of my stuff that she wanted? | cz0xcbn | cz0q94c | 1,452,988,705 | 1,452,977,329 | 9 | 8 | Not to be pessimistic (I sincerely wish you all the best!) but if you can afford and qualify for a life insurance policy with your sister as the beneficiary, if worst came to worst you could help her that way too. In any case please update when the docs get a handle on what's happening. I, and I'm sure many others, are concerned and wish to know. If you're okay with that. Sending hugs! | I think you should just give the stuff to your sister while you are alive. Children don't have many legal rights in general. | 1 | 11,376 | 1.125 |
419fwm | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | I'm a teenager. I might be dying. Is there any way I can make sure my little sister gets some of my stuff after I die? [Canada] Hi! I'm seventeen, and to make a long story short, I've been having some medical problems for a while. We don't know for sure, but things don't necessarily look *fantastic* right now. Tests will reveal more soon, and hopefully they'll reveal that I have something simple and treatable, but they might not. I've been thinking about what will happen in the event that they don't. I don't live with my biological family. In Canada, what happens to teenagers who can't live with their families is a bit different. When you're an older teenager, like me, instead of being in a foster home you get a small amount of money from the government to cover groceries, a bus pass, and the government will pay for you to rent a room somewhere. Currently, I live in a group home with a couple of other teenagers, although I'll hopefully be moving soon. The only family I've got is my little sister, who's just over a year younger than me. I don't live with her and she's not in the care of the government. If I do die, my younger sister would be devastated. Nothing I own is worth very much, and I don't really have any savings, but I think my sister would find some sentimental value in having some of my stuff (my favourite scarf, some of my favourite books, the plush animal I've had since I was like four, etc.) I don't know what would happen to the rest of my stuff after I die--if I had to guess, the people who run the group home (if I still live here when I die) will donate it to charity or something. Is there any way I could make sure my sister had any of my stuff that she wanted? | cz0xcbn | cz0pk1u | 1,452,988,705 | 1,452,976,079 | 9 | 5 | Not to be pessimistic (I sincerely wish you all the best!) but if you can afford and qualify for a life insurance policy with your sister as the beneficiary, if worst came to worst you could help her that way too. In any case please update when the docs get a handle on what's happening. I, and I'm sure many others, are concerned and wish to know. If you're okay with that. Sending hugs! | The easiest way would be to just give her that stuff while you're alive, if possible. | 1 | 12,626 | 1.8 |
419fwm | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | I'm a teenager. I might be dying. Is there any way I can make sure my little sister gets some of my stuff after I die? [Canada] Hi! I'm seventeen, and to make a long story short, I've been having some medical problems for a while. We don't know for sure, but things don't necessarily look *fantastic* right now. Tests will reveal more soon, and hopefully they'll reveal that I have something simple and treatable, but they might not. I've been thinking about what will happen in the event that they don't. I don't live with my biological family. In Canada, what happens to teenagers who can't live with their families is a bit different. When you're an older teenager, like me, instead of being in a foster home you get a small amount of money from the government to cover groceries, a bus pass, and the government will pay for you to rent a room somewhere. Currently, I live in a group home with a couple of other teenagers, although I'll hopefully be moving soon. The only family I've got is my little sister, who's just over a year younger than me. I don't live with her and she's not in the care of the government. If I do die, my younger sister would be devastated. Nothing I own is worth very much, and I don't really have any savings, but I think my sister would find some sentimental value in having some of my stuff (my favourite scarf, some of my favourite books, the plush animal I've had since I was like four, etc.) I don't know what would happen to the rest of my stuff after I die--if I had to guess, the people who run the group home (if I still live here when I die) will donate it to charity or something. Is there any way I could make sure my sister had any of my stuff that she wanted? | cz0r9fm | cz0xcbn | 1,452,979,108 | 1,452,988,705 | 2 | 9 | I don't know if you can start an rrsp, but if you can, do so and name your sister the beneficiary, the bank will hold it in a trust until she turns 18. | Not to be pessimistic (I sincerely wish you all the best!) but if you can afford and qualify for a life insurance policy with your sister as the beneficiary, if worst came to worst you could help her that way too. In any case please update when the docs get a handle on what's happening. I, and I'm sure many others, are concerned and wish to know. If you're okay with that. Sending hugs! | 0 | 9,597 | 4.5 |
419fwm | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | I'm a teenager. I might be dying. Is there any way I can make sure my little sister gets some of my stuff after I die? [Canada] Hi! I'm seventeen, and to make a long story short, I've been having some medical problems for a while. We don't know for sure, but things don't necessarily look *fantastic* right now. Tests will reveal more soon, and hopefully they'll reveal that I have something simple and treatable, but they might not. I've been thinking about what will happen in the event that they don't. I don't live with my biological family. In Canada, what happens to teenagers who can't live with their families is a bit different. When you're an older teenager, like me, instead of being in a foster home you get a small amount of money from the government to cover groceries, a bus pass, and the government will pay for you to rent a room somewhere. Currently, I live in a group home with a couple of other teenagers, although I'll hopefully be moving soon. The only family I've got is my little sister, who's just over a year younger than me. I don't live with her and she's not in the care of the government. If I do die, my younger sister would be devastated. Nothing I own is worth very much, and I don't really have any savings, but I think my sister would find some sentimental value in having some of my stuff (my favourite scarf, some of my favourite books, the plush animal I've had since I was like four, etc.) I don't know what would happen to the rest of my stuff after I die--if I had to guess, the people who run the group home (if I still live here when I die) will donate it to charity or something. Is there any way I could make sure my sister had any of my stuff that she wanted? | cz0q94c | cz0pk1u | 1,452,977,329 | 1,452,976,079 | 8 | 5 | I think you should just give the stuff to your sister while you are alive. Children don't have many legal rights in general. | The easiest way would be to just give her that stuff while you're alive, if possible. | 1 | 1,250 | 1.6 |
419fwm | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | I'm a teenager. I might be dying. Is there any way I can make sure my little sister gets some of my stuff after I die? [Canada] Hi! I'm seventeen, and to make a long story short, I've been having some medical problems for a while. We don't know for sure, but things don't necessarily look *fantastic* right now. Tests will reveal more soon, and hopefully they'll reveal that I have something simple and treatable, but they might not. I've been thinking about what will happen in the event that they don't. I don't live with my biological family. In Canada, what happens to teenagers who can't live with their families is a bit different. When you're an older teenager, like me, instead of being in a foster home you get a small amount of money from the government to cover groceries, a bus pass, and the government will pay for you to rent a room somewhere. Currently, I live in a group home with a couple of other teenagers, although I'll hopefully be moving soon. The only family I've got is my little sister, who's just over a year younger than me. I don't live with her and she's not in the care of the government. If I do die, my younger sister would be devastated. Nothing I own is worth very much, and I don't really have any savings, but I think my sister would find some sentimental value in having some of my stuff (my favourite scarf, some of my favourite books, the plush animal I've had since I was like four, etc.) I don't know what would happen to the rest of my stuff after I die--if I had to guess, the people who run the group home (if I still live here when I die) will donate it to charity or something. Is there any way I could make sure my sister had any of my stuff that she wanted? | cz0yt8g | cz0r9fm | 1,452,991,076 | 1,452,979,108 | 3 | 2 | Good luck champ, you're handling this great. I hope you post again when you get the good news that things aren't so dire :) | I don't know if you can start an rrsp, but if you can, do so and name your sister the beneficiary, the bank will hold it in a trust until she turns 18. | 1 | 11,968 | 1.5 |
733dxa | legaladvice_train | 0.92 | My mother has assaulted me in the past but we declined to press charges. She is now physically involving herself with my immunocompromised infant despite me asking her to be vaccinated first. What are my legal options? It’s a fairly long story, so bear with me. I’m going to just hit the major points * 5 months ago my mother assaulted me while drunk. The assault led to injuries that led to preterm delivery of my daughter at 26 weeks. We declined to press charges (yes I am dumb but hormones and stress and morphine and family pressure) * I told her the only way she would meet my severely immunocompromised newborn post-NICU release would be if she was vaccinated. She is a stalwart woo believer and refused * Despite me saying “well then no baby time for you” she will run into me while out and, without a word to me, pick up my infant out of her carrier and hold her. She is currently sick which is making me even more freaked out by this. I yell and she puts down my daughter and scurries off. I do not think she’s stalking me- neither of us drive and I still live in the neighborhood I grew up in, so we frequent the same places. What are my legal options to at least stop her from grabbing my baby in public? I don’t want to press charges for the assault but I 100% believe she is a danger to my infant. (State is NY) TL;DR- my mom can be violent and generally completely psycho. She assaulted me. We declined to press charges. I required her to be vaccinated to meet my daughter; she said no. If we run into each other out she will not say anything to me but will take my infant out of her carrier. What legal options do I have? | dnnds7c | dnneir1 | 1,506,640,268 | 1,506,641,225 | 177 | 286 | If she approaches you in public, you need to make a scene. Yell "STAY AWAY FROM ME! YOU DO NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO TOUCH MY BABY!" You need to unleash your inner Momma Bear. Have courage. You can do this. | You are your daughter's protection and her advocate. Realize your mother beat you badly enough that you had a severely premature baby, and your daughter could have suffered lasting injuries. This is serious, that she refuses to listen to you or treat you as an adult. Stop compromising. You give an inch, she takes a mile. She is not going to listen to you when you ask her to do something. People don't change their behavior easily. Get a restraining order pronto and the grounds of you not wanting her around you or your child is enough. Stay away from her. If she approaches your daughter, call the police. Please consider therapy because her behaviour is highly damaging. Having a professional to help you establish healthy boundaries. | 0 | 957 | 1.615819 |
733dxa | legaladvice_train | 0.92 | My mother has assaulted me in the past but we declined to press charges. She is now physically involving herself with my immunocompromised infant despite me asking her to be vaccinated first. What are my legal options? It’s a fairly long story, so bear with me. I’m going to just hit the major points * 5 months ago my mother assaulted me while drunk. The assault led to injuries that led to preterm delivery of my daughter at 26 weeks. We declined to press charges (yes I am dumb but hormones and stress and morphine and family pressure) * I told her the only way she would meet my severely immunocompromised newborn post-NICU release would be if she was vaccinated. She is a stalwart woo believer and refused * Despite me saying “well then no baby time for you” she will run into me while out and, without a word to me, pick up my infant out of her carrier and hold her. She is currently sick which is making me even more freaked out by this. I yell and she puts down my daughter and scurries off. I do not think she’s stalking me- neither of us drive and I still live in the neighborhood I grew up in, so we frequent the same places. What are my legal options to at least stop her from grabbing my baby in public? I don’t want to press charges for the assault but I 100% believe she is a danger to my infant. (State is NY) TL;DR- my mom can be violent and generally completely psycho. She assaulted me. We declined to press charges. I required her to be vaccinated to meet my daughter; she said no. If we run into each other out she will not say anything to me but will take my infant out of her carrier. What legal options do I have? | dnneir1 | dnna7w6 | 1,506,641,225 | 1,506,635,847 | 286 | 138 | You are your daughter's protection and her advocate. Realize your mother beat you badly enough that you had a severely premature baby, and your daughter could have suffered lasting injuries. This is serious, that she refuses to listen to you or treat you as an adult. Stop compromising. You give an inch, she takes a mile. She is not going to listen to you when you ask her to do something. People don't change their behavior easily. Get a restraining order pronto and the grounds of you not wanting her around you or your child is enough. Stay away from her. If she approaches your daughter, call the police. Please consider therapy because her behaviour is highly damaging. Having a professional to help you establish healthy boundaries. | I'm assuming you are an adult, or are at the age of majority where you live. Because you are an adult, you can choose what you interact with. Because you are completely responsible for the care of your child, you can refuse to let anyone pick up the child. In the eyes of the law, if you are an adult, your biological mother has no special rights over you, your child or your life. | 1 | 5,378 | 2.072464 |
733dxa | legaladvice_train | 0.92 | My mother has assaulted me in the past but we declined to press charges. She is now physically involving herself with my immunocompromised infant despite me asking her to be vaccinated first. What are my legal options? It’s a fairly long story, so bear with me. I’m going to just hit the major points * 5 months ago my mother assaulted me while drunk. The assault led to injuries that led to preterm delivery of my daughter at 26 weeks. We declined to press charges (yes I am dumb but hormones and stress and morphine and family pressure) * I told her the only way she would meet my severely immunocompromised newborn post-NICU release would be if she was vaccinated. She is a stalwart woo believer and refused * Despite me saying “well then no baby time for you” she will run into me while out and, without a word to me, pick up my infant out of her carrier and hold her. She is currently sick which is making me even more freaked out by this. I yell and she puts down my daughter and scurries off. I do not think she’s stalking me- neither of us drive and I still live in the neighborhood I grew up in, so we frequent the same places. What are my legal options to at least stop her from grabbing my baby in public? I don’t want to press charges for the assault but I 100% believe she is a danger to my infant. (State is NY) TL;DR- my mom can be violent and generally completely psycho. She assaulted me. We declined to press charges. I required her to be vaccinated to meet my daughter; she said no. If we run into each other out she will not say anything to me but will take my infant out of her carrier. What legal options do I have? | dnneay2 | dnneir1 | 1,506,640,943 | 1,506,641,225 | 37 | 286 | You don't live with her, so you're only running into her in public. Keep screaming if she takes your child...but have you considered moving away? I can't believe that after repeated calls to the police about a woman touching your child they won't do anything. | You are your daughter's protection and her advocate. Realize your mother beat you badly enough that you had a severely premature baby, and your daughter could have suffered lasting injuries. This is serious, that she refuses to listen to you or treat you as an adult. Stop compromising. You give an inch, she takes a mile. She is not going to listen to you when you ask her to do something. People don't change their behavior easily. Get a restraining order pronto and the grounds of you not wanting her around you or your child is enough. Stay away from her. If she approaches your daughter, call the police. Please consider therapy because her behaviour is highly damaging. Having a professional to help you establish healthy boundaries. | 0 | 282 | 7.72973 |
733dxa | legaladvice_train | 0.92 | My mother has assaulted me in the past but we declined to press charges. She is now physically involving herself with my immunocompromised infant despite me asking her to be vaccinated first. What are my legal options? It’s a fairly long story, so bear with me. I’m going to just hit the major points * 5 months ago my mother assaulted me while drunk. The assault led to injuries that led to preterm delivery of my daughter at 26 weeks. We declined to press charges (yes I am dumb but hormones and stress and morphine and family pressure) * I told her the only way she would meet my severely immunocompromised newborn post-NICU release would be if she was vaccinated. She is a stalwart woo believer and refused * Despite me saying “well then no baby time for you” she will run into me while out and, without a word to me, pick up my infant out of her carrier and hold her. She is currently sick which is making me even more freaked out by this. I yell and she puts down my daughter and scurries off. I do not think she’s stalking me- neither of us drive and I still live in the neighborhood I grew up in, so we frequent the same places. What are my legal options to at least stop her from grabbing my baby in public? I don’t want to press charges for the assault but I 100% believe she is a danger to my infant. (State is NY) TL;DR- my mom can be violent and generally completely psycho. She assaulted me. We declined to press charges. I required her to be vaccinated to meet my daughter; she said no. If we run into each other out she will not say anything to me but will take my infant out of her carrier. What legal options do I have? | dnnds7c | dnna7w6 | 1,506,640,268 | 1,506,635,847 | 177 | 138 | If she approaches you in public, you need to make a scene. Yell "STAY AWAY FROM ME! YOU DO NOT HAVE PERMISSION TO TOUCH MY BABY!" You need to unleash your inner Momma Bear. Have courage. You can do this. | I'm assuming you are an adult, or are at the age of majority where you live. Because you are an adult, you can choose what you interact with. Because you are completely responsible for the care of your child, you can refuse to let anyone pick up the child. In the eyes of the law, if you are an adult, your biological mother has no special rights over you, your child or your life. | 1 | 4,421 | 1.282609 |
733dxa | legaladvice_train | 0.92 | My mother has assaulted me in the past but we declined to press charges. She is now physically involving herself with my immunocompromised infant despite me asking her to be vaccinated first. What are my legal options? It’s a fairly long story, so bear with me. I’m going to just hit the major points * 5 months ago my mother assaulted me while drunk. The assault led to injuries that led to preterm delivery of my daughter at 26 weeks. We declined to press charges (yes I am dumb but hormones and stress and morphine and family pressure) * I told her the only way she would meet my severely immunocompromised newborn post-NICU release would be if she was vaccinated. She is a stalwart woo believer and refused * Despite me saying “well then no baby time for you” she will run into me while out and, without a word to me, pick up my infant out of her carrier and hold her. She is currently sick which is making me even more freaked out by this. I yell and she puts down my daughter and scurries off. I do not think she’s stalking me- neither of us drive and I still live in the neighborhood I grew up in, so we frequent the same places. What are my legal options to at least stop her from grabbing my baby in public? I don’t want to press charges for the assault but I 100% believe she is a danger to my infant. (State is NY) TL;DR- my mom can be violent and generally completely psycho. She assaulted me. We declined to press charges. I required her to be vaccinated to meet my daughter; she said no. If we run into each other out she will not say anything to me but will take my infant out of her carrier. What legal options do I have? | dnng464 | dnnm9y4 | 1,506,643,342 | 1,506,650,972 | 79 | 124 | I was a premie. Was able to come home at 6 months. Was back into the ER after my Aunt visited with the full blown flu. My Mom almost lost me. You are your child's protection. Need to go NC with your Mom until your baby is protected by her vaccine shots. | Call the police and make a scene, it's attempted kidnapping. Press charges and get a restraining order. Also for the love of god get therapy. Your normal meter is broken and needs fixing | 0 | 7,630 | 1.56962 |
733dxa | legaladvice_train | 0.92 | My mother has assaulted me in the past but we declined to press charges. She is now physically involving herself with my immunocompromised infant despite me asking her to be vaccinated first. What are my legal options? It’s a fairly long story, so bear with me. I’m going to just hit the major points * 5 months ago my mother assaulted me while drunk. The assault led to injuries that led to preterm delivery of my daughter at 26 weeks. We declined to press charges (yes I am dumb but hormones and stress and morphine and family pressure) * I told her the only way she would meet my severely immunocompromised newborn post-NICU release would be if she was vaccinated. She is a stalwart woo believer and refused * Despite me saying “well then no baby time for you” she will run into me while out and, without a word to me, pick up my infant out of her carrier and hold her. She is currently sick which is making me even more freaked out by this. I yell and she puts down my daughter and scurries off. I do not think she’s stalking me- neither of us drive and I still live in the neighborhood I grew up in, so we frequent the same places. What are my legal options to at least stop her from grabbing my baby in public? I don’t want to press charges for the assault but I 100% believe she is a danger to my infant. (State is NY) TL;DR- my mom can be violent and generally completely psycho. She assaulted me. We declined to press charges. I required her to be vaccinated to meet my daughter; she said no. If we run into each other out she will not say anything to me but will take my infant out of her carrier. What legal options do I have? | dnneay2 | dnnm9y4 | 1,506,640,943 | 1,506,650,972 | 37 | 124 | You don't live with her, so you're only running into her in public. Keep screaming if she takes your child...but have you considered moving away? I can't believe that after repeated calls to the police about a woman touching your child they won't do anything. | Call the police and make a scene, it's attempted kidnapping. Press charges and get a restraining order. Also for the love of god get therapy. Your normal meter is broken and needs fixing | 0 | 10,029 | 3.351351 |
733dxa | legaladvice_train | 0.92 | My mother has assaulted me in the past but we declined to press charges. She is now physically involving herself with my immunocompromised infant despite me asking her to be vaccinated first. What are my legal options? It’s a fairly long story, so bear with me. I’m going to just hit the major points * 5 months ago my mother assaulted me while drunk. The assault led to injuries that led to preterm delivery of my daughter at 26 weeks. We declined to press charges (yes I am dumb but hormones and stress and morphine and family pressure) * I told her the only way she would meet my severely immunocompromised newborn post-NICU release would be if she was vaccinated. She is a stalwart woo believer and refused * Despite me saying “well then no baby time for you” she will run into me while out and, without a word to me, pick up my infant out of her carrier and hold her. She is currently sick which is making me even more freaked out by this. I yell and she puts down my daughter and scurries off. I do not think she’s stalking me- neither of us drive and I still live in the neighborhood I grew up in, so we frequent the same places. What are my legal options to at least stop her from grabbing my baby in public? I don’t want to press charges for the assault but I 100% believe she is a danger to my infant. (State is NY) TL;DR- my mom can be violent and generally completely psycho. She assaulted me. We declined to press charges. I required her to be vaccinated to meet my daughter; she said no. If we run into each other out she will not say anything to me but will take my infant out of her carrier. What legal options do I have? | dnng464 | dnneay2 | 1,506,643,342 | 1,506,640,943 | 79 | 37 | I was a premie. Was able to come home at 6 months. Was back into the ER after my Aunt visited with the full blown flu. My Mom almost lost me. You are your child's protection. Need to go NC with your Mom until your baby is protected by her vaccine shots. | You don't live with her, so you're only running into her in public. Keep screaming if she takes your child...but have you considered moving away? I can't believe that after repeated calls to the police about a woman touching your child they won't do anything. | 1 | 2,399 | 2.135135 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfe05zr | dfdyl7y | 1,490,441,749 | 1,490,435,312 | 1,264 | 468 | Just to clarify... This isn't catfishing at all. In order for it to be a catfish situation your friend would have to turn out to be a 55 year old woman or 34 year old guy. Your friend is exactly who she claims to be. Catfishing also has a purpose of establishing a relationship with someone online while hiding your true identity. What your friend is doing is just an old fashioned scam. I doubt it's legal. And I know it's not safe. | Holy shit. Uh, not a lawyer, not from the US but an adult. Lets look at this from a safety point of view. The biggest thing is that she's sending these guys pictures of her *face*. These men will know exactly what she looks like. Then there's the failed to deliver nudes: Paedophiles are not stupid. When something is not delivered, then they will automatically assume the worst - that the entire conversation has been passed along to the authorities. Now, I'm not sure if tip-lines in the states take their tipoffs seriously but I would hope they do - especially those which include credible evidence. I understand your friend hates these kind of people - everyone with an ounce of moral fibre hates these people - but sending them pictures of herself is incredibly dangerous. These people could know plenty of ways or people to track her down from that one photo. If they know they've been caught red handed then they know they'll be looking at a long and unpleasant jail term with the sex offence registry after - what's holding them back from getting revenge on the 15 year old that scammed them and reported them? *Nothing*. There is a very good chance that these people will be angry and obviously have some connections. I understand your friend is in need of money, I understand she hates these people, but there are better and less dangerous options available to her than pretending to prostitute herself for money and making many, many enemies. And then there's what happens if a paedophile is tracked down and arrested due to one of her tipoffs. The police are dutybound to find your friend (especially if they want to take this to trial) and -shitty as this may sound - your friend could actually hinder the court case against this man if his defense lawyers *ever* find out that she has done this to multiple people. He could use that information to slander her name - create doubts about her character and the strength of the case against him. Your friend needs to stop ASAP before someone savvy enough or angry enough finds her. Please do try and talk her out of this. | 1 | 6,437 | 2.700855 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfe05zr | dfdyqlo | 1,490,441,749 | 1,490,435,867 | 1,264 | 86 | Just to clarify... This isn't catfishing at all. In order for it to be a catfish situation your friend would have to turn out to be a 55 year old woman or 34 year old guy. Your friend is exactly who she claims to be. Catfishing also has a purpose of establishing a relationship with someone online while hiding your true identity. What your friend is doing is just an old fashioned scam. I doubt it's legal. And I know it's not safe. | (Edit: removed, misread the OP) On a side note, is sounds like her situation is serious and warrants a CPS report. The best way would probably be if she tells a mandatory reporter (for example a teacher). | 1 | 5,882 | 14.697674 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfe05zr | dfdzunj | 1,490,441,749 | 1,490,440,446 | 1,264 | 20 | Just to clarify... This isn't catfishing at all. In order for it to be a catfish situation your friend would have to turn out to be a 55 year old woman or 34 year old guy. Your friend is exactly who she claims to be. Catfishing also has a purpose of establishing a relationship with someone online while hiding your true identity. What your friend is doing is just an old fashioned scam. I doubt it's legal. And I know it's not safe. | >Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? Ahh, the stupidity of youth. Tell your friend to put away her batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. Tell your friend that she is blackmailing people and that this is a state and federal crime. The same way that she finds out who those people are and she reports them to the authorities while remaining anonymous, those people can also find out who she is and report her to the authorities anonymously. The only thing that law enforcement officers hate MORE than people who break the law are people who break the law while wearing a batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. | 1 | 1,303 | 63.2 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfe5kck | dfdyqlo | 1,490,453,667 | 1,490,435,867 | 268 | 86 | I think you should be making an anonymous call to CPS and the police. Your friend has clearly not gotten the help and coping tools she needed after being abused. It sounds like her home life isn't fit for children and she needs to get out of that situation. I worry that in the future she may turn to prostitution in order to help her parents get out of debt. In all reality, the debt of her parents is NOT her responsibility to pay or contribute to; it is their debt, they need to take care of it. I'm sorry she is doing this but when I read this, it sounds like your friend is screaming (not crying) for help in coping with what happened to her. I was sexually abused as a child by my own brother and I wasn't able to speak out against him. It wasn't until I was in my 20's and I put myself into therapy was I able to receive the tools I needed to cope with what happened to me. Get her help. Now. One of these days, she won't be so lucky and someone may track her down and abuse her all over again or worse. | (Edit: removed, misread the OP) On a side note, is sounds like her situation is serious and warrants a CPS report. The best way would probably be if she tells a mandatory reporter (for example a teacher). | 1 | 17,800 | 3.116279 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfe4lj1 | dfe5kck | 1,490,452,024 | 1,490,453,667 | 49 | 268 | Sending nudes for money would be distributing child porn. Agreeing to do that becomes a criminal conspiracy once one person takes a substantial step toward completing the crime (like sending the money). Your friend literally is risking the police kicking her door in and criminal charges in state or federal court. She's way over her head. | I think you should be making an anonymous call to CPS and the police. Your friend has clearly not gotten the help and coping tools she needed after being abused. It sounds like her home life isn't fit for children and she needs to get out of that situation. I worry that in the future she may turn to prostitution in order to help her parents get out of debt. In all reality, the debt of her parents is NOT her responsibility to pay or contribute to; it is their debt, they need to take care of it. I'm sorry she is doing this but when I read this, it sounds like your friend is screaming (not crying) for help in coping with what happened to her. I was sexually abused as a child by my own brother and I wasn't able to speak out against him. It wasn't until I was in my 20's and I put myself into therapy was I able to receive the tools I needed to cope with what happened to me. Get her help. Now. One of these days, she won't be so lucky and someone may track her down and abuse her all over again or worse. | 0 | 1,643 | 5.469388 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfe0yvr | dfe5kck | 1,490,444,161 | 1,490,453,667 | 42 | 268 | There are organizations that partner with law enforcement to actually catch pedophiles. You could suggest she seek employment with one of them and to stop and keep her mouth shut about these activities. | I think you should be making an anonymous call to CPS and the police. Your friend has clearly not gotten the help and coping tools she needed after being abused. It sounds like her home life isn't fit for children and she needs to get out of that situation. I worry that in the future she may turn to prostitution in order to help her parents get out of debt. In all reality, the debt of her parents is NOT her responsibility to pay or contribute to; it is their debt, they need to take care of it. I'm sorry she is doing this but when I read this, it sounds like your friend is screaming (not crying) for help in coping with what happened to her. I was sexually abused as a child by my own brother and I wasn't able to speak out against him. It wasn't until I was in my 20's and I put myself into therapy was I able to receive the tools I needed to cope with what happened to me. Get her help. Now. One of these days, she won't be so lucky and someone may track her down and abuse her all over again or worse. | 0 | 9,506 | 6.380952 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfe5kck | dfdzunj | 1,490,453,667 | 1,490,440,446 | 268 | 20 | I think you should be making an anonymous call to CPS and the police. Your friend has clearly not gotten the help and coping tools she needed after being abused. It sounds like her home life isn't fit for children and she needs to get out of that situation. I worry that in the future she may turn to prostitution in order to help her parents get out of debt. In all reality, the debt of her parents is NOT her responsibility to pay or contribute to; it is their debt, they need to take care of it. I'm sorry she is doing this but when I read this, it sounds like your friend is screaming (not crying) for help in coping with what happened to her. I was sexually abused as a child by my own brother and I wasn't able to speak out against him. It wasn't until I was in my 20's and I put myself into therapy was I able to receive the tools I needed to cope with what happened to me. Get her help. Now. One of these days, she won't be so lucky and someone may track her down and abuse her all over again or worse. | >Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? Ahh, the stupidity of youth. Tell your friend to put away her batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. Tell your friend that she is blackmailing people and that this is a state and federal crime. The same way that she finds out who those people are and she reports them to the authorities while remaining anonymous, those people can also find out who she is and report her to the authorities anonymously. The only thing that law enforcement officers hate MORE than people who break the law are people who break the law while wearing a batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. | 1 | 13,221 | 13.4 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfe4lj1 | dfe0yvr | 1,490,452,024 | 1,490,444,161 | 49 | 42 | Sending nudes for money would be distributing child porn. Agreeing to do that becomes a criminal conspiracy once one person takes a substantial step toward completing the crime (like sending the money). Your friend literally is risking the police kicking her door in and criminal charges in state or federal court. She's way over her head. | There are organizations that partner with law enforcement to actually catch pedophiles. You could suggest she seek employment with one of them and to stop and keep her mouth shut about these activities. | 1 | 7,863 | 1.166667 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfe4lj1 | dfdzunj | 1,490,452,024 | 1,490,440,446 | 49 | 20 | Sending nudes for money would be distributing child porn. Agreeing to do that becomes a criminal conspiracy once one person takes a substantial step toward completing the crime (like sending the money). Your friend literally is risking the police kicking her door in and criminal charges in state or federal court. She's way over her head. | >Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? Ahh, the stupidity of youth. Tell your friend to put away her batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. Tell your friend that she is blackmailing people and that this is a state and federal crime. The same way that she finds out who those people are and she reports them to the authorities while remaining anonymous, those people can also find out who she is and report her to the authorities anonymously. The only thing that law enforcement officers hate MORE than people who break the law are people who break the law while wearing a batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. | 1 | 11,578 | 2.45 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfdzunj | dfe0yvr | 1,490,440,446 | 1,490,444,161 | 20 | 42 | >Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? Ahh, the stupidity of youth. Tell your friend to put away her batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. Tell your friend that she is blackmailing people and that this is a state and federal crime. The same way that she finds out who those people are and she reports them to the authorities while remaining anonymous, those people can also find out who she is and report her to the authorities anonymously. The only thing that law enforcement officers hate MORE than people who break the law are people who break the law while wearing a batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. | There are organizations that partner with law enforcement to actually catch pedophiles. You could suggest she seek employment with one of them and to stop and keep her mouth shut about these activities. | 0 | 3,715 | 2.1 |
61eroh | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Nevada- Friend (15f) is catfishing middle aged pedophiles, getting them to send $ to her paypal, and then reporting them as predators. Risk factors or legal repercussions? The title is pretty much self explanatory, but I'll give a little more context for those who are curious. Basically, me and my friend are 15 year old girls in the 10th grade and today (3/24) she told me she messages older men, in their 20s-50s, makes it clear she is a minor, sends them pictures of her (w/ her face in them), and tells them she will send them nudes (fully naked pics) if they send money to her PayPal account. Then, she quickly spends the money or transfers it out of her PP, and blocks them without sending them nudes. She takes their real name from their PayPal and submits their info to a cyber tipline for child sex predators. The reason she does this is because her family is heavily in debt, parents are abusive, has health problems, and she can't afford food always. She was also sexually abused as a child by an adult man, so she personally hates pedophiles. My friend makes it VERY CLEAR that she is underage because she only wants to scam bad people, and there is no way anyone could send money to her without having full knowledge that they are soliciting and purchasing child pornography. The men usually send her anywhere from $40-$100 although she has received more and less. She didn't tell me the exact number she has scammed, but she said it's 10+ and she has been doing this on and off since 13. Now for the actual question part. Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? I know she is scamming these men, but they are willingly sending money to her w/o guarantee they get anything and I don't know if it is illegal or not that she isn't fulfilling her part of the bargain (which is *illegal* itself because child pornography is illegal, but note she isn't actually sending any pornographic images, the only ones they see are innocent ones of her face). Is there any way the pedophiles could get away with reporting her to the police without revealing that they were trying to buy child pornography and she's the one who gets screwed over? Are the tiplines actually effective enough to get them arrested? Also, I'm not sure if this is legal related so I don't expect this one to get answered, but is there any likelihood that these guys will find out where she is and she will be in danger? P.S. sorry if the flair is wrong, I'm not sure exactly what this falls under | dfee29n | dfdzunj | 1,490,466,181 | 1,490,440,446 | 27 | 20 | I hope she knows what exif data is | >Is there any kind of trouble or danger she can get in by doing this? Ahh, the stupidity of youth. Tell your friend to put away her batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. Tell your friend that she is blackmailing people and that this is a state and federal crime. The same way that she finds out who those people are and she reports them to the authorities while remaining anonymous, those people can also find out who she is and report her to the authorities anonymously. The only thing that law enforcement officers hate MORE than people who break the law are people who break the law while wearing a batman/batwoman/catwoman(?) cape. | 1 | 25,735 | 1.35 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i06gfmk | i071qla | 1,646,958,821 | 1,646,968,606 | 4 | 286 | OP- how much were you told you would be paid for the position? | Did you talk to your manager? It could have been a simple error. | 0 | 9,785 | 71.5 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i071qla | i06tv9d | 1,646,968,606 | 1,646,964,919 | 286 | 3 | Did you talk to your manager? It could have been a simple error. | Not a lawyer op if you really need money I think you should let it go. If you think about it, $.50 per hour difference is 30$ per week even if you work 60 hour weeks. That's less than $1500 per year, i know it's a lot of money but it's better than no money? Your options are you either negotiate a bigger pay, try to work your way to a raise or find a new job if you really don't want to work for $17.00/hr. | 1 | 3,687 | 95.333333 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i075289 | i06gfmk | 1,646,970,250 | 1,646,958,821 | 169 | 4 | A legal right, probably not. However, you can maturely bring it up to your manager or hr in a non-accusatory way and see what they say. | OP- how much were you told you would be paid for the position? | 1 | 11,429 | 42.25 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i06tv9d | i075289 | 1,646,964,919 | 1,646,970,250 | 3 | 169 | Not a lawyer op if you really need money I think you should let it go. If you think about it, $.50 per hour difference is 30$ per week even if you work 60 hour weeks. That's less than $1500 per year, i know it's a lot of money but it's better than no money? Your options are you either negotiate a bigger pay, try to work your way to a raise or find a new job if you really don't want to work for $17.00/hr. | A legal right, probably not. However, you can maturely bring it up to your manager or hr in a non-accusatory way and see what they say. | 0 | 5,331 | 56.333333 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i08a4in | i06gfmk | 1,646,999,171 | 1,646,958,821 | 14 | 4 | In my experience generally the employee has a misunderstanding of the advertising. It’s very common and no different than a retailer advertising to get customers in the door. If that wasn’t the case, you have no recourse and it’s up to you to negotiate your salary or clarify what you will be paid before you start. If you’re this unhappy then you should find a different job that will pay you your worth. The next time, make sure you clarify your pay and make sure you obtain an offer letter with your pay in writing. | OP- how much were you told you would be paid for the position? | 1 | 40,350 | 3.5 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i08a4in | i06tv9d | 1,646,999,171 | 1,646,964,919 | 14 | 3 | In my experience generally the employee has a misunderstanding of the advertising. It’s very common and no different than a retailer advertising to get customers in the door. If that wasn’t the case, you have no recourse and it’s up to you to negotiate your salary or clarify what you will be paid before you start. If you’re this unhappy then you should find a different job that will pay you your worth. The next time, make sure you clarify your pay and make sure you obtain an offer letter with your pay in writing. | Not a lawyer op if you really need money I think you should let it go. If you think about it, $.50 per hour difference is 30$ per week even if you work 60 hour weeks. That's less than $1500 per year, i know it's a lot of money but it's better than no money? Your options are you either negotiate a bigger pay, try to work your way to a raise or find a new job if you really don't want to work for $17.00/hr. | 1 | 34,252 | 4.666667 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i08a4in | i07ya4f | 1,646,999,171 | 1,646,989,499 | 14 | 3 | In my experience generally the employee has a misunderstanding of the advertising. It’s very common and no different than a retailer advertising to get customers in the door. If that wasn’t the case, you have no recourse and it’s up to you to negotiate your salary or clarify what you will be paid before you start. If you’re this unhappy then you should find a different job that will pay you your worth. The next time, make sure you clarify your pay and make sure you obtain an offer letter with your pay in writing. | Most of those ads tend to say "up too". There may have been a condition or something you had to ask for. I would ask the employer as that rate maybe available to you still. And if not ask why the reason why is where something not right may have happened. Good luck! | 1 | 9,672 | 4.666667 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i06gfmk | i095xm7 | 1,646,958,821 | 1,647,014,743 | 4 | 8 | OP- how much were you told you would be paid for the position? | I looked at a job yesterday that advertised $30 an hour.... Then in the job description it said the actual pay is $14.5 plus commission. .....🙄 Hard. Pass. I know it isn't illegal... But it should be. | 0 | 55,922 | 2 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i08vzbk | i095xm7 | 1,647,010,699 | 1,647,014,743 | 3 | 8 | Didn’t you get an offer letter with your wage listed? Where I work recruitment ranges are posted with the jobs, but it doesn’t mean you’ll get the full amount. That’s based on experience. It just means you could earn up to that amount. | I looked at a job yesterday that advertised $30 an hour.... Then in the job description it said the actual pay is $14.5 plus commission. .....🙄 Hard. Pass. I know it isn't illegal... But it should be. | 0 | 4,044 | 2.666667 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i06tv9d | i095xm7 | 1,646,964,919 | 1,647,014,743 | 3 | 8 | Not a lawyer op if you really need money I think you should let it go. If you think about it, $.50 per hour difference is 30$ per week even if you work 60 hour weeks. That's less than $1500 per year, i know it's a lot of money but it's better than no money? Your options are you either negotiate a bigger pay, try to work your way to a raise or find a new job if you really don't want to work for $17.00/hr. | I looked at a job yesterday that advertised $30 an hour.... Then in the job description it said the actual pay is $14.5 plus commission. .....🙄 Hard. Pass. I know it isn't illegal... But it should be. | 0 | 49,824 | 2.666667 |
tbcqsd | legaladvice_train | 0.96 | Job advertised $17.50/hr on listing, I’ve discovered that I am being paid $17.00/hr instead. I’ve already signed paperwork and everything. Do I still have the legal right to pursue the wage advertised? I am in Michigan. | i095xm7 | i07ya4f | 1,647,014,743 | 1,646,989,499 | 8 | 3 | I looked at a job yesterday that advertised $30 an hour.... Then in the job description it said the actual pay is $14.5 plus commission. .....🙄 Hard. Pass. I know it isn't illegal... But it should be. | Most of those ads tend to say "up too". There may have been a condition or something you had to ask for. I would ask the employer as that rate maybe available to you still. And if not ask why the reason why is where something not right may have happened. Good luck! | 1 | 25,244 | 2.666667 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgm1b2b | hgm2wc3 | 1,634,219,988 | 1,634,220,700 | 90 | 204 | Unfortunately no. Any detail listed on a listing needs to be verified by you, the Buyer, especially if it is an important detail like square footage. If you take the Seller's appraisal as truth, that is on you. In our area (Midwest) it states on the bottom of our MLS showing sheets that any and all information should be verified by the Buyer. Sorry. Also, side note, appraisers can also disagree and use their own methods to find square footage. | From a technical standpoint, what kind of measurement did you actually get? It makes perfect sense to me that a measurement to redo floors would be less potentially than an appraisal measurement, where they may use the external dimensions of your home instead (or at the minimum include 6-10 inches for the walls). Unless you have the details of their calculation, it's not clear that they were purposefully misleading versus just using a different methodology. | 0 | 712 | 2.266667 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgm0d04 | hgm2wc3 | 1,634,219,560 | 1,634,220,700 | 47 | 204 | It is almost always the buyer's duty to verify. Why didn't you get your own appraisal? | From a technical standpoint, what kind of measurement did you actually get? It makes perfect sense to me that a measurement to redo floors would be less potentially than an appraisal measurement, where they may use the external dimensions of your home instead (or at the minimum include 6-10 inches for the walls). Unless you have the details of their calculation, it's not clear that they were purposefully misleading versus just using a different methodology. | 0 | 1,140 | 4.340426 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgm1b2b | hgm65kf | 1,634,219,988 | 1,634,222,116 | 90 | 103 | Unfortunately no. Any detail listed on a listing needs to be verified by you, the Buyer, especially if it is an important detail like square footage. If you take the Seller's appraisal as truth, that is on you. In our area (Midwest) it states on the bottom of our MLS showing sheets that any and all information should be verified by the Buyer. Sorry. Also, side note, appraisers can also disagree and use their own methods to find square footage. | Appraisers measure the outside dimensions of the home to determine square footage. Floor replacement measures only where floors will go. This is nowhere near enough of a difference to sue over. This is a typical difference. | 0 | 2,128 | 1.144444 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgm0d04 | hgm65kf | 1,634,219,560 | 1,634,222,116 | 47 | 103 | It is almost always the buyer's duty to verify. Why didn't you get your own appraisal? | Appraisers measure the outside dimensions of the home to determine square footage. Floor replacement measures only where floors will go. This is nowhere near enough of a difference to sue over. This is a typical difference. | 0 | 2,556 | 2.191489 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgm3jdr | hgm65kf | 1,634,220,982 | 1,634,222,116 | 26 | 103 | The recourse you receive is $600 (that you didn't spend on getting an appraisal done). I'm not sure correcting that sq foot number would have made a material difference in the final price. People viewed the house and made their offers based on that viewing. It does not follow that you can say 'it's 10% smaller so I can pay 10% less'. I'm curious about what the error actually was, do you have any details? It is a vague statement (200 or 300 sq ft, which is it? and that is different than the 2300 sq ft and the 1885 sq ft you mention) and that is actually pretty small, it could be the back wall is 2ft closer than what someone measured. Or did they include a closed-in patio, a crawl space, or an attic space? | Appraisers measure the outside dimensions of the home to determine square footage. Floor replacement measures only where floors will go. This is nowhere near enough of a difference to sue over. This is a typical difference. | 0 | 1,134 | 3.961538 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgm1b2b | hgm0d04 | 1,634,219,988 | 1,634,219,560 | 90 | 47 | Unfortunately no. Any detail listed on a listing needs to be verified by you, the Buyer, especially if it is an important detail like square footage. If you take the Seller's appraisal as truth, that is on you. In our area (Midwest) it states on the bottom of our MLS showing sheets that any and all information should be verified by the Buyer. Sorry. Also, side note, appraisers can also disagree and use their own methods to find square footage. | It is almost always the buyer's duty to verify. Why didn't you get your own appraisal? | 1 | 428 | 1.914894 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgm3jdr | hgmhb7f | 1,634,220,982 | 1,634,226,761 | 26 | 45 | The recourse you receive is $600 (that you didn't spend on getting an appraisal done). I'm not sure correcting that sq foot number would have made a material difference in the final price. People viewed the house and made their offers based on that viewing. It does not follow that you can say 'it's 10% smaller so I can pay 10% less'. I'm curious about what the error actually was, do you have any details? It is a vague statement (200 or 300 sq ft, which is it? and that is different than the 2300 sq ft and the 1885 sq ft you mention) and that is actually pretty small, it could be the back wall is 2ft closer than what someone measured. Or did they include a closed-in patio, a crawl space, or an attic space? | Presumably you're not redoing the floors underneath the bathtubs, showers, certain appliances, the width of the walls between rooms, etc. Those small differences add up. | 0 | 5,779 | 1.730769 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgmh1dv | hgmhb7f | 1,634,226,649 | 1,634,226,761 | 5 | 45 | Realtor here, no that's part of your "due diligence" period.Home's are sold "as is" , its up to you to figure out what that means with inspection and appraisal period. Frankly, I have never heard of a buyer NOT getting an appraisal. Was this Realtor your friend? Sounds like a scam both agents cooked up to close a deal fast with no regard to the buyer. | Presumably you're not redoing the floors underneath the bathtubs, showers, certain appliances, the width of the walls between rooms, etc. Those small differences add up. | 0 | 112 | 9 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgmn2x8 | hgmlxk3 | 1,634,229,135 | 1,634,228,672 | 4 | 3 | Hello OP - I sincerely apologize, but I need to lock you post due to the number of off-topic and unhelpful comments you are getting now and there's little else that we can explain from a legal perspective. Best of luck; take care. | I'm not a lawyer, but a Realtor in NJ. I don't know how things are done in CA, but here no lender would let you use the sellers appraisal. Also, when things have happens like that here there is legal precedent to get compensated whatever it would cost to get the extra 200-300 sq feet added to your house. My advice is get a lawyer and discuss your options 200-300 sq feet in CA I assume could be worth quite a lot. | 1 | 463 | 1.333333 |
q80388 | legaladvice_train | 0.89 | House 200 to 300 sq ft smaller than appraisal seller's gave me. Can I be compensated after a year? Roseville, CA Last year, I bought a house being sold as 2300 sqft based on the appraisal given to me by the seller. I was wary about this because I saw that the house was listed as 1885 sq ft on one of the real estate websites, so I asked. The seller's realtor and my realtor assured me that an appraisal can't lie and that the house was actually 2300 sqft. I was also told that there was no reason to get my own appraisal from my mortgage lender, to save the money and not worry about it. Stupidly, I listened. Now (one year later), I'm redoing the floors, so the house was measured and I found out that the actual square footage is from 200 to 300 square feet less? Do I have any legal recourse? Can I be compensated? Or did I sign off my right to compensation by not getting my own appraisal? I appreciate any help I can get on this. Thanks | hgnae2t | hgo3b0r | 1,634,238,777 | 1,634,252,001 | 2 | 3 | Square footage is measured in different ways for different purposes. For instance some measurements would include garages and unfinished basements while others would only include living space. Also I believe appraisers measure the outside of the house which includes walls where as the floors would only be inside. For an appraisal they're looking at material that goes into a home and not just living space. A house with think well insulated homes or brick homes would be worth more than one with thinner walls, but with a similar sized perimeter might have much less interior square footage. | The calculation could be based on exterior dimensions. A 10x10 exterior measurement equals 100 sq/ft. But with a 6 inch all the way around, it measures 9x9 inside, which is 81 sq/ft. So a 19 sq/ft variance. So for every 2 ft of exterior wall, assuming 2x6 construction, (6 1/2 inch wall finished) you lose 1.04 square feet per 2 lineal foot of wallwall. From 2300 to 1885 gives me a 415 foot variance, or 768ish lineal feet of wall, which seems large. But, if they measured the outside of the building, and you only measured your room sizes, wall thicknesses will come into play, and depending on the municipality, garages don’t count towards square footage, so the garage could make up missing amount. Not a lawyer, but a carpenter/custom home builder. Just some food for thought. “Never attribute to malice, what can be explained by ignorance/stupidity”. | 0 | 13,224 | 1.5 |
uj3pia | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Landlord gave one week notice that I’m to move all of my belongings out of house and also be off premises for three days to install new carpets. Not an emergency or an eviction. I was just informed by text that my landlords want to install new carpeting throughout the house to make the place look nice in order to sell after I move out. I have a new place I’m moving to on June 3rd and my lease at the current house isn’t supposed to end until June 15th. They want me to pack up all of my belongings and furniture and move it out of the house (they said I can use the garage). They also want me to be gone during this time and expect the job to take 3-4 days. They said I can move everything back in once it’s all finished. I don’t have family or friends to stay with in the area and I work remote so essentially they are taking away both my living and working space for that time. I’ve already explained that I don’t know where I can go and they said their hands are tied and this is the only date available for the company replacing the carpets. Is it legal for them to make me leave? I can’t find any information on this. I live in Minnesota. | i7gge9o | i7h60o7 | 1,651,775,248 | 1,651,785,583 | 18 | 38 | What does your lease say? Are they compensatinh you for your inconvenience? I wouldn't budge unless I'm getting in writting that there will be compensation at least. 3 nights in a hotel is 300-900 depending on area and day of check-in plus an addition 300 for 2 uhauls and storage unit. Plus lost wages. By my estimates, your looking at a good 1000 to 1200 loss from this unreasonable request. It could be more. It would be more beneficial for everyone involved if he either moved you free of charge to another similar facility or he waited until your lease expires. | Unless your lease or some other controlling agreement says otherwise, you have rented the use of the building for that period. They not being able to find a time slot is simply not your problem. Since you are moving out in June anyway they have very little leverage over you, so yes I'd just say no or demand that they give you money to cover your costs and for the inconveience. Be aware that if they are annoyed they may play around with your security deposit, so look into the rules about what can be withheld and the timing on that in MN. | 0 | 10,335 | 2.111111 |
uj3pia | legaladvice_train | 0.93 | Landlord gave one week notice that I’m to move all of my belongings out of house and also be off premises for three days to install new carpets. Not an emergency or an eviction. I was just informed by text that my landlords want to install new carpeting throughout the house to make the place look nice in order to sell after I move out. I have a new place I’m moving to on June 3rd and my lease at the current house isn’t supposed to end until June 15th. They want me to pack up all of my belongings and furniture and move it out of the house (they said I can use the garage). They also want me to be gone during this time and expect the job to take 3-4 days. They said I can move everything back in once it’s all finished. I don’t have family or friends to stay with in the area and I work remote so essentially they are taking away both my living and working space for that time. I’ve already explained that I don’t know where I can go and they said their hands are tied and this is the only date available for the company replacing the carpets. Is it legal for them to make me leave? I can’t find any information on this. I live in Minnesota. | i7gge9o | i7hae0t | 1,651,775,248 | 1,651,787,457 | 18 | 22 | What does your lease say? Are they compensatinh you for your inconvenience? I wouldn't budge unless I'm getting in writting that there will be compensation at least. 3 nights in a hotel is 300-900 depending on area and day of check-in plus an addition 300 for 2 uhauls and storage unit. Plus lost wages. By my estimates, your looking at a good 1000 to 1200 loss from this unreasonable request. It could be more. It would be more beneficial for everyone involved if he either moved you free of charge to another similar facility or he waited until your lease expires. | You paid rent for May already, and your lease runs through June 15th? Then they can take a hike. Unless they're willing to pay for professionals to pack, move, and unpack your belongs for you, plus provide you accommodations, I would not even consider entertaining their request. They can make whatever renovations to the house they please once you've moved out. | 0 | 12,209 | 1.222222 |
wcdxxq | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | Closed on new house, seller was only supposed to leave appliances, but left a ton more Recently closed on a house. The seller had still been living there, but was out of the house within the agreed upon time. As part of the agreement in purchasing our new house, the seller had signed a document stating the only thing to be left behind was some appliances (fridge, stove, dishwasher). It's now been a couple days of hauling things out that was left behind, and putting it piles. All outside of the scope of our agreement. Everything from trash, yard equipment, furniture, boxes of holiday decorations, many bottles/cans of household chemicals, boxes of family photos. I'm estimating $500-$1000 to get rid of it all. In communicating with the sellers agent, he does not want anything that was left behind (I asked specifically because it seemed like potentially important family items). Currently communicating with the sellers agent to assist me in removing things (who was quite surprised, as the seller told their agent nothing was left). But I'm not getting any help from them so far. I really don't want to pursue legal action. But just in case, would it be possible, or reasonably likely, to have a successful civil suit based on this situation, after we remove everything to get our money back? Maybe any other advice? | iiceorq | iicr5pq | 1,659,241,487 | 1,659,249,822 | 79 | 218 | You can sue for the cost of disposing of the items as they breached your contract. At this amount it would surely be small claims court which will have a small fee and you would not need a lawyer. You are never guaranteed to win but if you have pictures of the state the house was left in and a copy of the contract saying the home would be left empty except for xyz that's a pretty solid case. Collecting can be a huge hassle though, if they don't pay willingly. | Buying house lesson: If the house isn’t in the exact state you expect it to be at the final inspection right before settlement (closing), you either A. Delay settlement until it is, or B. Go ahead and settle, but hold back a sum of money from the sale to be held in the lawyers or agents trust account as a bond. If they property is not as agreed in the agreed timeframe, that money is used to pay for it to be cleaned/cleared/whatever. | 0 | 8,335 | 2.759494 |
wcdxxq | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | Closed on new house, seller was only supposed to leave appliances, but left a ton more Recently closed on a house. The seller had still been living there, but was out of the house within the agreed upon time. As part of the agreement in purchasing our new house, the seller had signed a document stating the only thing to be left behind was some appliances (fridge, stove, dishwasher). It's now been a couple days of hauling things out that was left behind, and putting it piles. All outside of the scope of our agreement. Everything from trash, yard equipment, furniture, boxes of holiday decorations, many bottles/cans of household chemicals, boxes of family photos. I'm estimating $500-$1000 to get rid of it all. In communicating with the sellers agent, he does not want anything that was left behind (I asked specifically because it seemed like potentially important family items). Currently communicating with the sellers agent to assist me in removing things (who was quite surprised, as the seller told their agent nothing was left). But I'm not getting any help from them so far. I really don't want to pursue legal action. But just in case, would it be possible, or reasonably likely, to have a successful civil suit based on this situation, after we remove everything to get our money back? Maybe any other advice? | iicr5pq | iicdcnm | 1,659,249,822 | 1,659,240,708 | 218 | 56 | Buying house lesson: If the house isn’t in the exact state you expect it to be at the final inspection right before settlement (closing), you either A. Delay settlement until it is, or B. Go ahead and settle, but hold back a sum of money from the sale to be held in the lawyers or agents trust account as a bond. If they property is not as agreed in the agreed timeframe, that money is used to pay for it to be cleaned/cleared/whatever. | Did you do a final walkthrough before close? Contact your agent for advice. | 1 | 9,114 | 3.892857 |
wcdxxq | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | Closed on new house, seller was only supposed to leave appliances, but left a ton more Recently closed on a house. The seller had still been living there, but was out of the house within the agreed upon time. As part of the agreement in purchasing our new house, the seller had signed a document stating the only thing to be left behind was some appliances (fridge, stove, dishwasher). It's now been a couple days of hauling things out that was left behind, and putting it piles. All outside of the scope of our agreement. Everything from trash, yard equipment, furniture, boxes of holiday decorations, many bottles/cans of household chemicals, boxes of family photos. I'm estimating $500-$1000 to get rid of it all. In communicating with the sellers agent, he does not want anything that was left behind (I asked specifically because it seemed like potentially important family items). Currently communicating with the sellers agent to assist me in removing things (who was quite surprised, as the seller told their agent nothing was left). But I'm not getting any help from them so far. I really don't want to pursue legal action. But just in case, would it be possible, or reasonably likely, to have a successful civil suit based on this situation, after we remove everything to get our money back? Maybe any other advice? | iicr5pq | iic4dz7 | 1,659,249,822 | 1,659,235,999 | 218 | 37 | Buying house lesson: If the house isn’t in the exact state you expect it to be at the final inspection right before settlement (closing), you either A. Delay settlement until it is, or B. Go ahead and settle, but hold back a sum of money from the sale to be held in the lawyers or agents trust account as a bond. If they property is not as agreed in the agreed timeframe, that money is used to pay for it to be cleaned/cleared/whatever. | Yard sale (if your HOA permits) and cut your losses. No one can judge your success in a lawsuit or the likelihood that you could collect. | 1 | 13,823 | 5.891892 |
wcdxxq | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | Closed on new house, seller was only supposed to leave appliances, but left a ton more Recently closed on a house. The seller had still been living there, but was out of the house within the agreed upon time. As part of the agreement in purchasing our new house, the seller had signed a document stating the only thing to be left behind was some appliances (fridge, stove, dishwasher). It's now been a couple days of hauling things out that was left behind, and putting it piles. All outside of the scope of our agreement. Everything from trash, yard equipment, furniture, boxes of holiday decorations, many bottles/cans of household chemicals, boxes of family photos. I'm estimating $500-$1000 to get rid of it all. In communicating with the sellers agent, he does not want anything that was left behind (I asked specifically because it seemed like potentially important family items). Currently communicating with the sellers agent to assist me in removing things (who was quite surprised, as the seller told their agent nothing was left). But I'm not getting any help from them so far. I really don't want to pursue legal action. But just in case, would it be possible, or reasonably likely, to have a successful civil suit based on this situation, after we remove everything to get our money back? Maybe any other advice? | iiceorq | iicdcnm | 1,659,241,487 | 1,659,240,708 | 79 | 56 | You can sue for the cost of disposing of the items as they breached your contract. At this amount it would surely be small claims court which will have a small fee and you would not need a lawyer. You are never guaranteed to win but if you have pictures of the state the house was left in and a copy of the contract saying the home would be left empty except for xyz that's a pretty solid case. Collecting can be a huge hassle though, if they don't pay willingly. | Did you do a final walkthrough before close? Contact your agent for advice. | 1 | 779 | 1.410714 |
wcdxxq | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | Closed on new house, seller was only supposed to leave appliances, but left a ton more Recently closed on a house. The seller had still been living there, but was out of the house within the agreed upon time. As part of the agreement in purchasing our new house, the seller had signed a document stating the only thing to be left behind was some appliances (fridge, stove, dishwasher). It's now been a couple days of hauling things out that was left behind, and putting it piles. All outside of the scope of our agreement. Everything from trash, yard equipment, furniture, boxes of holiday decorations, many bottles/cans of household chemicals, boxes of family photos. I'm estimating $500-$1000 to get rid of it all. In communicating with the sellers agent, he does not want anything that was left behind (I asked specifically because it seemed like potentially important family items). Currently communicating with the sellers agent to assist me in removing things (who was quite surprised, as the seller told their agent nothing was left). But I'm not getting any help from them so far. I really don't want to pursue legal action. But just in case, would it be possible, or reasonably likely, to have a successful civil suit based on this situation, after we remove everything to get our money back? Maybe any other advice? | iiceorq | iic4dz7 | 1,659,241,487 | 1,659,235,999 | 79 | 37 | You can sue for the cost of disposing of the items as they breached your contract. At this amount it would surely be small claims court which will have a small fee and you would not need a lawyer. You are never guaranteed to win but if you have pictures of the state the house was left in and a copy of the contract saying the home would be left empty except for xyz that's a pretty solid case. Collecting can be a huge hassle though, if they don't pay willingly. | Yard sale (if your HOA permits) and cut your losses. No one can judge your success in a lawsuit or the likelihood that you could collect. | 1 | 5,488 | 2.135135 |
wcdxxq | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | Closed on new house, seller was only supposed to leave appliances, but left a ton more Recently closed on a house. The seller had still been living there, but was out of the house within the agreed upon time. As part of the agreement in purchasing our new house, the seller had signed a document stating the only thing to be left behind was some appliances (fridge, stove, dishwasher). It's now been a couple days of hauling things out that was left behind, and putting it piles. All outside of the scope of our agreement. Everything from trash, yard equipment, furniture, boxes of holiday decorations, many bottles/cans of household chemicals, boxes of family photos. I'm estimating $500-$1000 to get rid of it all. In communicating with the sellers agent, he does not want anything that was left behind (I asked specifically because it seemed like potentially important family items). Currently communicating with the sellers agent to assist me in removing things (who was quite surprised, as the seller told their agent nothing was left). But I'm not getting any help from them so far. I really don't want to pursue legal action. But just in case, would it be possible, or reasonably likely, to have a successful civil suit based on this situation, after we remove everything to get our money back? Maybe any other advice? | iic4dz7 | iicdcnm | 1,659,235,999 | 1,659,240,708 | 37 | 56 | Yard sale (if your HOA permits) and cut your losses. No one can judge your success in a lawsuit or the likelihood that you could collect. | Did you do a final walkthrough before close? Contact your agent for advice. | 0 | 4,709 | 1.513514 |
wcdxxq | legaladvice_train | 0.94 | Closed on new house, seller was only supposed to leave appliances, but left a ton more Recently closed on a house. The seller had still been living there, but was out of the house within the agreed upon time. As part of the agreement in purchasing our new house, the seller had signed a document stating the only thing to be left behind was some appliances (fridge, stove, dishwasher). It's now been a couple days of hauling things out that was left behind, and putting it piles. All outside of the scope of our agreement. Everything from trash, yard equipment, furniture, boxes of holiday decorations, many bottles/cans of household chemicals, boxes of family photos. I'm estimating $500-$1000 to get rid of it all. In communicating with the sellers agent, he does not want anything that was left behind (I asked specifically because it seemed like potentially important family items). Currently communicating with the sellers agent to assist me in removing things (who was quite surprised, as the seller told their agent nothing was left). But I'm not getting any help from them so far. I really don't want to pursue legal action. But just in case, would it be possible, or reasonably likely, to have a successful civil suit based on this situation, after we remove everything to get our money back? Maybe any other advice? | iidqkze | iidpmyg | 1,659,275,310 | 1,659,274,839 | 11 | 2 | Best time would have been at closing after a final walk through. For that amount small claims court is your best bet. You would chew up more than your loss in lawyer fees. | You should have done a walkthrough before you closed and demanded a holdback of funds or refusal to close. If you’ve already closed, you have no leverage and are SOOL | 1 | 471 | 5.5 |
6s1gk6 | legaladvice_train | 0.81 | [CA] A d-list movie used footage of me they filmed without my permission. The title sums it up pretty well. This whole situation was recently brought to my attention by a friend who noticed that I was featured in an awful movie that's now on Netflix. It's a super low budget "Sharknado" style film with a brief ski sequence. I'm the skier in the sequence and the shots were filmed entirely without my permission, I had ***NO*** idea I was even being filmed let alone that the shots would end up in a movie. Skiing is my livelihood and I think I deserve a credit at least, if not a meager payment. What should I do? | dl9k484 | dl9qeju | 1,502,071,588 | 1,502,080,168 | 66 | 72 | Here's what I strongly suggest you do, call these people. They are lawyers in California who specialize in music, movies, and the arts. They can get you a consultation to run down your rights and options. It's basically pocket change and it will get you a much clearer understanding of this specific case rather than general rules of thumb that we can provide over the internet. Remember, as per the side bar we can't give official legal advice, we are only giving general information. Odds are that there's not much actionable here, but if you want to be sure then this is the way to be sure. | So I've made these types of movies. I probably even personally know the people who made the film you are in as I am friends with some of the shark movie people. Anyway, regardless of if it's legal or not your chances of getting anything are zilch. These types of movies are set up under LLCs that are specifically designed to be abandoned in case anything like this comes up. Not only that, but can you prove it's you in the film? Like beyond a shadow of a doubt. We have all sorts of tricks in the film industry to make things seem not as they really are. If I was confronted by you I'd ask you to prove it's really you. If you really are as famous as you say I'd be happy to hear from you and offer you something to help promote the film with your social media following. Hell I'd probably even want to do some more shots with you. But be aware the SAG ultra low budget scale pay is around $100 for the day. Even the top names on these films only make a few thousand for a few weeks of work. So don't expect a big paycheck. If it was a transformers movie then sure. You might get $5000 or so to do a ski stunt. But for a shark movie it's going to be a hundred bucks and some expenses. Or they'll just use it and you can sue a dead LLC. | 0 | 8,580 | 1.090909 |
6s1gk6 | legaladvice_train | 0.81 | [CA] A d-list movie used footage of me they filmed without my permission. The title sums it up pretty well. This whole situation was recently brought to my attention by a friend who noticed that I was featured in an awful movie that's now on Netflix. It's a super low budget "Sharknado" style film with a brief ski sequence. I'm the skier in the sequence and the shots were filmed entirely without my permission, I had ***NO*** idea I was even being filmed let alone that the shots would end up in a movie. Skiing is my livelihood and I think I deserve a credit at least, if not a meager payment. What should I do? | dl9dobd | dl9qeju | 1,502,062,826 | 1,502,080,168 | 33 | 72 | Would a stranger be able to identify you from the film? Is your face shown? (I'm not positive that's relevant, just guessing it might be. I'm not a lawyer.) | So I've made these types of movies. I probably even personally know the people who made the film you are in as I am friends with some of the shark movie people. Anyway, regardless of if it's legal or not your chances of getting anything are zilch. These types of movies are set up under LLCs that are specifically designed to be abandoned in case anything like this comes up. Not only that, but can you prove it's you in the film? Like beyond a shadow of a doubt. We have all sorts of tricks in the film industry to make things seem not as they really are. If I was confronted by you I'd ask you to prove it's really you. If you really are as famous as you say I'd be happy to hear from you and offer you something to help promote the film with your social media following. Hell I'd probably even want to do some more shots with you. But be aware the SAG ultra low budget scale pay is around $100 for the day. Even the top names on these films only make a few thousand for a few weeks of work. So don't expect a big paycheck. If it was a transformers movie then sure. You might get $5000 or so to do a ski stunt. But for a shark movie it's going to be a hundred bucks and some expenses. Or they'll just use it and you can sue a dead LLC. | 0 | 17,342 | 2.181818 |
6s1gk6 | legaladvice_train | 0.81 | [CA] A d-list movie used footage of me they filmed without my permission. The title sums it up pretty well. This whole situation was recently brought to my attention by a friend who noticed that I was featured in an awful movie that's now on Netflix. It's a super low budget "Sharknado" style film with a brief ski sequence. I'm the skier in the sequence and the shots were filmed entirely without my permission, I had ***NO*** idea I was even being filmed let alone that the shots would end up in a movie. Skiing is my livelihood and I think I deserve a credit at least, if not a meager payment. What should I do? | dl9qeju | dl9ou2p | 1,502,080,168 | 1,502,077,789 | 72 | 12 | So I've made these types of movies. I probably even personally know the people who made the film you are in as I am friends with some of the shark movie people. Anyway, regardless of if it's legal or not your chances of getting anything are zilch. These types of movies are set up under LLCs that are specifically designed to be abandoned in case anything like this comes up. Not only that, but can you prove it's you in the film? Like beyond a shadow of a doubt. We have all sorts of tricks in the film industry to make things seem not as they really are. If I was confronted by you I'd ask you to prove it's really you. If you really are as famous as you say I'd be happy to hear from you and offer you something to help promote the film with your social media following. Hell I'd probably even want to do some more shots with you. But be aware the SAG ultra low budget scale pay is around $100 for the day. Even the top names on these films only make a few thousand for a few weeks of work. So don't expect a big paycheck. If it was a transformers movie then sure. You might get $5000 or so to do a ski stunt. But for a shark movie it's going to be a hundred bucks and some expenses. Or they'll just use it and you can sue a dead LLC. | I think everyone here is failing the simple test of, if you were in a public place and you *happened* to be in the video, well, it's unlikely you have any recourse. Now, were you a major element to the scene? Were they filming exclusively **you**. Are you the major/only part of that scene? In that case, using your likeness may cause problems. What do you do about it? I don't know I am not a lawyer. Someone else will have to chime in. | 1 | 2,379 | 6 |
6s1gk6 | legaladvice_train | 0.81 | [CA] A d-list movie used footage of me they filmed without my permission. The title sums it up pretty well. This whole situation was recently brought to my attention by a friend who noticed that I was featured in an awful movie that's now on Netflix. It's a super low budget "Sharknado" style film with a brief ski sequence. I'm the skier in the sequence and the shots were filmed entirely without my permission, I had ***NO*** idea I was even being filmed let alone that the shots would end up in a movie. Skiing is my livelihood and I think I deserve a credit at least, if not a meager payment. What should I do? | dl9iaid | dl9qeju | 1,502,069,225 | 1,502,080,168 | 6 | 72 | What state were you in? The rules about the commercial use of your private image for a profitable venture vary across the country. | So I've made these types of movies. I probably even personally know the people who made the film you are in as I am friends with some of the shark movie people. Anyway, regardless of if it's legal or not your chances of getting anything are zilch. These types of movies are set up under LLCs that are specifically designed to be abandoned in case anything like this comes up. Not only that, but can you prove it's you in the film? Like beyond a shadow of a doubt. We have all sorts of tricks in the film industry to make things seem not as they really are. If I was confronted by you I'd ask you to prove it's really you. If you really are as famous as you say I'd be happy to hear from you and offer you something to help promote the film with your social media following. Hell I'd probably even want to do some more shots with you. But be aware the SAG ultra low budget scale pay is around $100 for the day. Even the top names on these films only make a few thousand for a few weeks of work. So don't expect a big paycheck. If it was a transformers movie then sure. You might get $5000 or so to do a ski stunt. But for a shark movie it's going to be a hundred bucks and some expenses. Or they'll just use it and you can sue a dead LLC. | 0 | 10,943 | 12 |
6s1gk6 | legaladvice_train | 0.81 | [CA] A d-list movie used footage of me they filmed without my permission. The title sums it up pretty well. This whole situation was recently brought to my attention by a friend who noticed that I was featured in an awful movie that's now on Netflix. It's a super low budget "Sharknado" style film with a brief ski sequence. I'm the skier in the sequence and the shots were filmed entirely without my permission, I had ***NO*** idea I was even being filmed let alone that the shots would end up in a movie. Skiing is my livelihood and I think I deserve a credit at least, if not a meager payment. What should I do? | dl9dobd | dl9k484 | 1,502,062,826 | 1,502,071,588 | 33 | 66 | Would a stranger be able to identify you from the film? Is your face shown? (I'm not positive that's relevant, just guessing it might be. I'm not a lawyer.) | Here's what I strongly suggest you do, call these people. They are lawyers in California who specialize in music, movies, and the arts. They can get you a consultation to run down your rights and options. It's basically pocket change and it will get you a much clearer understanding of this specific case rather than general rules of thumb that we can provide over the internet. Remember, as per the side bar we can't give official legal advice, we are only giving general information. Odds are that there's not much actionable here, but if you want to be sure then this is the way to be sure. | 0 | 8,762 | 2 |
6s1gk6 | legaladvice_train | 0.81 | [CA] A d-list movie used footage of me they filmed without my permission. The title sums it up pretty well. This whole situation was recently brought to my attention by a friend who noticed that I was featured in an awful movie that's now on Netflix. It's a super low budget "Sharknado" style film with a brief ski sequence. I'm the skier in the sequence and the shots were filmed entirely without my permission, I had ***NO*** idea I was even being filmed let alone that the shots would end up in a movie. Skiing is my livelihood and I think I deserve a credit at least, if not a meager payment. What should I do? | dl9iaid | dl9k484 | 1,502,069,225 | 1,502,071,588 | 6 | 66 | What state were you in? The rules about the commercial use of your private image for a profitable venture vary across the country. | Here's what I strongly suggest you do, call these people. They are lawyers in California who specialize in music, movies, and the arts. They can get you a consultation to run down your rights and options. It's basically pocket change and it will get you a much clearer understanding of this specific case rather than general rules of thumb that we can provide over the internet. Remember, as per the side bar we can't give official legal advice, we are only giving general information. Odds are that there's not much actionable here, but if you want to be sure then this is the way to be sure. | 0 | 2,363 | 11 |
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