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I hope megathicc is having a good day And the rest of everyone as well :)
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I'm gonna tell u guys a crazy story.. So, I've decided to go back in time, to be exact, so..my baggage will consist of .$ .A Lenovo ThinkPad . *Reinforced HDD and SSD, .a Digital Camera . A WiFi USB and several boosters .audrino based Aqua sensor (wifi controlled) . A Gun I would arrive at Southampton, London at April ,... upon arrival, I would get myself an attire that suits the time (I don't wanna walk around in a hoodie)..., I would also visit a White Star Line's Office to purchase a first class ticket to the unsinkable ship, I would spend the rest of my time exploring Southampton, secretly taking pictures.....at April , I would board the Ship ... I will write the rest later...
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Im not really religious but why would you go to hell if you commit suicide like that seems unfairI always hear god has a plan and he knows how everything will go and that he is the reason everyone is born. Then by that logic I was born only to lead a life of emptiness and mental illness which will makes me want to end it and thats his plan for me yet Ill still get punished for it??? So why is that unforgivable
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Most of you don't live in the same country as me. Tonight, I called two helplines with the same story. Very different reactions. Can provide (non-personal) details if you are interested.Ok, I'm not gonna write a rambling post about offing myself, although I appreciate how severe the situation in this country is. I want to live. I suffer from depression and anxiety and feel totally alone, so tonight called (for the first time ever) two helplines. I won't identify them. One had a kind person who had suffered from depression and came out the other end. Seems talking about personal experience is OK with them. She gave me the names and numbers of services, of which are specific to my situation. She also advised a visit to my GP (general practitioner). She shared her personal experiences with depression and bereavement and that was amazing. She ruled. At the same time, I sort of felt like she wanted me to get off the phone, if that is possible. The conversation felt terribly rushed. Second person was the best listener ever - it felt like he would listen to me for hours if necessary. I kept saying sorry for taking up his time but he was so patient. He was a much better listener then the last call but couldn't recommend any services. Great guy but he said that he is not allowed to tell me where to get help. I am wondering why this guy can't even tell me to go to my local doctor? I am astounded. This has been refused by my more private account - so here i go public.
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Best Shows to Watch When Suicidal?Looking for something to binge watch when I want to kill myself. I've watched Sopranos, GoT, Walking Dead, Bojack, Atypical, and I just started shameless.
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Why the fuck will minecraft optifine not install Java SE binary just won't start this is fucking stupid
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byeHello guys ! Im a nineteen years old from *****, Im passionate about computers, technology, music and many other things. Right now Im supposed to be studying for my entrance exams to med school, sadly I just cant bring myself to, not sure if its lazyness, stress, or maybe even depression but I havent been able to work at all in the past months. My exams are very competitive so that means I will % fail them. I guess thats sucks, but its not the end of the world, all that means is that Ive wasted the last years of my life and that my parents will be extremely disappointed in me. By the way I cant retake the exams, so I guess Ill live with regret for the rest of my life,wishing that I wouldve worked harder during these months leading up to the exams. Sucks to suck I guess, Ill just have to keep grinding and get a different degree. Except Im just tired, to be honest, I dont want to work anymore, I dont want to make any efforts. Having an enjoyable life is way too much work, Ive already made a big mess of my life and I dont want to clean it up. Why would I even try ? Even if I pull through nothing is waiting for me at the end of the tunnel, most things I enjoy are very superficial and arent worth all this work. I dont want to live my life with huge regrets, disappointed parents, and broken dreams, Id rather end it now and be done with it. I understand lots of people are a lot worse of than me, Im as privileged as it get, Im constantly reminded of that yet all it does is make me feel empty inside because of all that potential is wasted on me. I truly wish I could give my life to someone else. I also understand suicide is a selfish act and a coward solution, but I guess I wont feel bad when Im dead, I wont feel anything anymore. Sucks for my family who truly love me and who wont see it coming, sucks for my gf but Im sure shell get over it, sucks for my friends but fuckem anyways. For once Ill do something for myself. I cant work anymore, Im tired.
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Unbearable painA relationship I was in (ish years) recently ended. He's already moved on and it's barely been a week or two. It makes me unbearably depressed that he probably didn't love me for as long as I loved him and was probably happy to be gone from me. I cant help but wonder why he wants so many people but not me in the end. Normally one should be able to get over this eventually like all painful breakups, but I'm also suffering from major depression and anxiety amongst other disorders, so it feels like this pain is being amplified x to the point that I feel like I must kill myself over it. I know that I don't, but with this quarantine forcing me to be isolated and alone, I wonder if this is God's way of saying that this is it for me.
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Not in control of my bodyI couldnt motivate myself to drink something for maybe or days now. My hands are shaking so much, I cant hold things properly anymore. Maybe I will just dehydrate myself until I die. I cant think straight anymore. Im actually really close to killing myself rn. Didnt think the day would come Im actually not a coward and would pull through. I have my pocket knife laying next to me. There are so many possible choices
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Shawty bad, like morally Direct quote: "who says cartels are bad? theyre fun asfffff"
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Today years ago today i was being raped and it still feels like it happened yesterday. Thats it. Thats the post. Im done.
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My crybaby postI don't know. Off work sick. Like as in I'm physically ill. I just feel like now would be a good time to go ahead with my plan. I mean, I just want to be done with "the whole race, the whole business". Life is stupid for me. I hate my job with a passion. I need to start a decent career but I can't decide what to do. I'm sick of people, I don't like them. I pollute people, and society is polluted already. I can't hand in my means because I'm so used to living on the thin edge of life. M, I should probably just grow a pair.
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I feel like a big hypocrite, all the time.It's not that I don't mean what I preach about, I truly mean it. Suicide isn't the answer and we can all get better. We can all see beautiful things and have moments in our lives that whisper in the back of our heads over the screams of our pain "you can make it". It's a faint whisper, almost non-audible but it's always there. Even in the direst situation, it's always there to tell us that there will be something worth to live for someday. I truly mean everything that I tell people. I just can't help but feel like I'm a "lie" because I don't think none of that applies to me. It just feels so lonely and painful. I wish I could use my own advice and apply to my life but I can't... I just wish I wouldn't have been born at all so all this pain would never even be real. You know, if I kill myself... when I kill myself, I will die along with the pain. It won't vanish, I will just disappear along with it. That's why I just wish I wouldn't have been born. I don't wanna give up but I have been fighting for too long for something that doesn't exist.
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I can't stand being alone and I can't stand being around people.I feel like I'm slowly eating myself alive. I hate light. I hate noise. I hate physical contact. Being so much as near other people makes me feel like I just drank a litre of molten plastic. I don't know why. I don't know if it's conditioned or innate to my personality. To me, people *feel* noxious and inflammatory. I'm not especially volatile. At least not these days. I don't hate or resent anyone, I just genuinely am bothered by human contact, for some inexplicable reason. Like standing next to an unbearably hot fire. And yet I'm so fucking alone. Every single fucking day for the past twenty years I go about my business and there is just absolutely fucking no one. I've managed to completely isolate myself from the world. Congratulations to me, right? Now there's no one to care, no one to talk to, no one who'll be arsed if I kill myself. And that's the only solution. Because the reason I self-isolate is that I can't stand other people. I've tried and tried and tried connecting with others in as many ways as I am capable of. It never works. No one can handle someone as fucked up as me and I can't handle anyone else. So yeah, I should probably just die already.
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Bruh Sis still in the hospital, that guy Im scared of but dated got arrested right in front of me, and I have to find a new job but shit could be a lot worse lets be real
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I will literally do anything you want in photoshop for a $ steam digital card Ok so im $ short on a csgo music kit to surprise my friend but all of my $ is in cash :/ I wanna surprise my friend with a music kit that he really hates (ezence) and give him a skin that he really wants. I can photoshop pretty decently, I got around or years of experience. Hop in the dms if interested
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Am I even real?I feel so numb to everything. Every positive emotion I have goes flat in a matter of minutes and every negative emotion lingers for the rest of the day. I feel like Im never really happy, and if I am, its for such a short amount of time that it feels as if it never happened. I feel like my emotions are broken. Maybe its the medication Im on, idk. I think my boyfriend and I are drifting apart. Im just not interesting anymore and I have too many problems. Im too much to deal with and he even admitted it. I hurt so badly all of the time and I try so hard to manage on my own but I guess I rely on him a lot. I dont want to rely on anyone anymore. I just dont want to exist. I dont even want to violently hurt myself, I just want to passively fade away. Stop eating and drinking and just shrivel up and die. I dont have anything in my life going right and it hurts so badly. Everything always hurts. I dont see a way out of this, for once. I dont think there is one. Im always going to end up feeling numb again. I always do, through every relationship, every job, every school, every job, every therapist, every single change. Im just always going to be numb.
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I have no idea how to get help.Can I just go to the walk in clinic? What do I say.
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Its all too much, and I dont see it getting better. Every time I get overwhelmed, I say it cant get worse, and it feels like a lie because it always does.So Im at work. Thinking about death. Because life is an endless stream of overwhelming unhappiness. Even if it gets better temporarily, it always gets bad again. Why would I want to subject myself to this? I dont know how much more I can handle, and Im so scared.
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crazy how i can just get on this subreddit every single day & not talk about jerkin off some of yall need to take notes please ..... i promise ......... nobody cares that u jerked off today ...... no more
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Scared to dieI'm tired of being alive but I'm too scared of the idea of pain during death I don't believe in anything after and I feel like I'm postponing the inevitable, meds aren't helping anymore and I don't see why I couldn't have just gone through with it years ago when I was more manic/inclined I keep 'lightly' toying with hanging but I'm scared it won't go through I'm so tired of fighting my head I'm sorry for rambling I wish I could be euthanised The only solace everyone around me has is I'm too fucking stupidly scared to actually do anything
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Ill get a girlfriend When a toyota breaks down
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Im lost (emotionally and mentally) I highly doubt anyone can help me here but rather just want to see how many people relate or think like me. You see when i mean by lost i mean i have no clue what to do or what im suppose to do. Nothing i do is fulfilling and ive basically become an emotionless thing that jist walks and talks. I have more years of highschool left and i still dont have my shit together like the rest of my classmates my grades are good enough to allow me take most walks of life whether it be a trade or profession like programmer (hopefullythey stay good for junior and senior year). But with these countless options to take im at a loss. So who else is lost or found life a little bit empty.
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i need the courage to hang myselfany tips and tricks how i could conquer the fear of freeing myself? i readed many stuff like how to get uncounsiouss fast while hanging and where on the neck the knot should be. but all i need is some extra courage. please provide me with that
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What do you do when all of the regular distractions stop working.For about two months now I haven't gone a single day where I haven't had some sort of suicidal thoughts. Before that they would only ever really come when I was feeling down or depressed but at some point it progressed to any time that I was alone with myself. I could keep myself distracted by playing computer games, watching YouTube, watching movies, etc. But as soon as any of that stopped, my mind would drift back to those thoughts of suicide. It's always the same, I think about my martial arts belt, I imagine how the noose is to be tied, and then everything else that follows. If it's not that, it might be on the same stretch of road that I drive looking at that same pole at the end of a nice long straight stretch. If it's not that it's looking at every single car that passes me going the other way. Then it progressed to if I'm not actively trying to distract myself my mind would just snap back immediately to those thoughts. Like one of those stupid videos that loop automatically. Over and over. Now it has progressed to the point where even as I'm trying to distract myself, I still have those thoughts rolling around in my head. It's like the little video is stuck on loop in another browser tab or something and never goes away. I can be in the middle of a conversation with someone and trying to pay attention but I just keep on thinking about it. There have been so many events that just keep on chipping away at me. I honestly don't want to die but I just feel like I'm losing the battle. I'm not a religious man but I try and be spiritual. I just can't manage to convince myself that any of this matters.
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So we just watched a summary of and uhhhhhh We really need to read the book, but a lot of what the partys saying makes an awful lot of sense. They could structure their society to be nicer to their citizens without losing almost any power, so thats a bit rude, but in general theyre kinda the good guys, at least from what we understood. So yeah. Big Brother good.
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, gay, alone, on lockdown. What better time to go than now.The whole world is collapsing. Im beginning to not give a fuck about anything. My date tonight got cancelled and I feel like as a gay man Ill be alone my whole life. I have nothing to kill myself with, but the feeling of eternal loneliness is my biggest fear. Id rather die than be forever alone. On top of this, the COVID crisis is only making things worse. I just wish things would turn around.
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I had to execute my emergency planThings have gotten rather difficult lately and it hurts that much more when its your own family poking at your mental weaknesses - they seem to know them best and seem to enjoy seeing me at my worst. Being a gun owner makes moments of brokenness like these especially hard to get through. My heart is heavy and tired and my mind is clouded but Im thankful I thought just clearly enough to execute my emergency plan. Hopped in the car with the dog, drove to my drive through Jesus window, parked the car and am listening to some metal. For those wondering theres this church that has a small prayer area in the back which is obviously closed at this hour, but from the parking lot its illuminated so beautifully its just a peaceful place - I dont even belong to this church or any church for that matter but the spot gives me a such a sense of tranquility in these moments when the horrible thoughts cross my mind of how easily I could end things if I were home. Ill sit here in the car longer until the tempest in my mind calms a bit more - looking over to my dog in the passenger seat helps me come up with at least my first reason to move forward and keep trying at life. I think Ill get him a plain cheeseburger when I leave and give myself a second reason. Stay kind yall.
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I feel like a fuckin looser tbh The only things I seem to get enjoyment out of is playing videogames, watching youtube and listening to audiobooks. I sit for atleast hours every day on my pc yet I still don't know shit about computers and I don't feel like I have any special interests.
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What's the point of living when you're useless?When the only thing you're good for is sitting on your ass all day watching tv shows and movies on the computer, when you have no decent foreseeable future, when any enjoyment you get only last minutes before being engulfed in sadness?
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Well I got my first real, naked nudes today Like the ones I got before were bra pics and shit but now I got real ones. Pretty epic
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Im straight up vibing bro I have two tests and I probably am not as ready as I should be but Im vibing, idgaf, Im just so happy
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whats my personality be honest. honestly I think Im dumb, funny and a sandwich.
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Opinion about woody in toy story Just watched toy story recently and Woody is such a f*$#ing simp for a SHEEP LADY WHO DRIVES A SKUNK seriously though the ending sucks
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i'm feeling suicidal. please help me if you love me.I just want to know what's wrong with me. After that I'd know where to start and get help before I do something I'll regret. I can't go to a doctor right now, my parents I guess don't care enough to help me. I have no one else to take me either so... I got nothing. Obviously I'm not asking for someone to "diagnose" me. I don't think I'm that stupid to think that's how it works. But if ANYONE knows anything about what I could have please tell me. I have the usual symptoms for depression except for one thing. I feel really sad most of the time. The reason why I say "most" of the time is because sometimes my mood improves to the point where I'm not depressed anymore. I don't get happy, but I just go back to normal as if it never happened at all, fully recovered. This only adds to the frustration. Why does this happen? When I do get to the point where I'm okay my mind makes me feel terrible. It tells me things like "just kill yourself" "you don't deserve to be happy" and other things. Keep in mind I said my HEAD says these things to me, I have no control over this at all. After a while of my head uncontrollablly telling me these things I'm back to being depressed and the voices stop. So it's like my brain doesn't want me to be happy? I don't know I just feel like a idiot. Maybe I should just kill myself. I already sound like a crazy person.
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OMFG I HAD THE SCARIEST DREAM I'VE EVER HAD The tl:dr is at the end if you don't want to read. Ok so first I saw this guy that is a year higher than me fucking my classmate but that isn't important. So I was rushing somewhere. I got out of a taxi,and ran through the road because I didn't have time. While I was running this other taxi was driving towards me. It stopped right next to me and apparently my gf was in the taxi and she was into archery and had a bow and some arrows on her lap. The inertia from the sudden stop got the arrow in the air and in her eye which killed her. Then her parents went into court,my parents didn't love me anymore and my friends weren't my friends anymore. It was WAAAAAY more scarier in the dream than it is when I type it lol. TL:DR: I killed my gf and lost everyone I loved.
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Deep down inside my soul I know I should pull the trigger on this mm pistol tonight...rocketing the gr copper coated lead hollowpoint through my fragile skull...I'm just venting the words that come into my mind as I stare at this loaded weapon tonight, lonely and empty. Forgotten by human society and left alone in solitary confinement. I've been left behind and forgotten by this world. Maybe I'll find the COURAGE to pull the trigger, maybe I won't. All I ask is that you don't try to stop me. Just read my words tonight. It's my right. My choice. That's American Freedom. You want to send the government after my ass? Well, they can throw my dead body in a cell. Nothing more. Nothing less.
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I have a genuine question I'm a teenager but I'm a social outcast so I don't have any sort of perspective on what we're like, so, um, could a fellow teenager (that is not a social outcast) tell me what we're like and what's popular with us? I'm looking for detailed answers because I want to educate myself, thanks!
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How old were you when you had your first sexualish experience? for me the first time i did any kind of roleplay was actually doing things i was goodie twoshoes i know
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I hate it that men feel uncomfortable when I compliment them Like, bro, we get it, you aint gay, but Im not flirting with when I tell you that your t-shirt is kinda cool. Get over yourself lmao. Why cant people take genuine compliments??? Im not even being creepy or telling them anything inappropriate. Just the most basic of compliments. Also, bare in mind I barely compliment strangers, most of the time its friends.
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I like this idea ngl Wouldn't it be funny, if reddit added this, if we could custom flair people? Like we could flair pedos. Ofc it would have to go through mods or people who will actually review it and look at the evidence, but I just thought of it this isn't meant to be like "reddit do this" it's just like a little joke, but I thought Its a cool "alternate universe" idea
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Today is a day of mourning. Ring the bells. Give your condolences. At : CST. Nemo Rodriguez form Finding Nemo passed away *Details coming soon as this story develops*
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can girls ask guys out? currently i dont have a crush but like is a girl asking a guy out like against the rules or something? yikesyikesyikesyikesyikesyikesyikesyikes
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Gonna end it all when this school year is overAfter all, I figure I deserve at least one more year of suffering, so why the fuck not? Plus, it's already been months, so I guess I don't have a long time to wait.
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i feel like drawing if anyone wants a drawing ill do it for free just pm me the details, itll probably only take a couple hours.
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Is there a place to plug content or other stuffs I have this gaming discord I want to spread around to get people to join (bc im lonely) and I want to find easy ways to spread it.  Also why am I hungry?
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I'm hurtingHow can this many blows happen in one Summer. I'm in so much pain. I haven't been okay in half a decade. I don't just think about suicide anymore, I desperately crave it. I can't suffer like this any longer. I can't be alone like this any longer. I can't hurt people any longer. I just want to hurt myself.
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Suicial but strong will to live.I have been ok. When I was - I went through major depressive episodes and an attempted suicide. I still live with an abusive mother who caused it. Im . It all stems from the absolute pain of being an loved/unwanted child. But I love alot of things and Im talented in alot of things, yet I feel these are just an escape. Everything is just an escape. I feel as if I have to survive. I have to be anxious all the time to survive I have to like certain things to survive. I dont think Im ever going to be able to live a normal life, just loops and loops. Yet when I plan suicides its always a specific train. I love trains and public transport, mainly systems. I sometimes will have suicidal periods as if my life or something is leading up to it and Im just wasting time. My life right now is just me giving myself delusion. I came into this post wanting detail knowing what I wanted but am ending this with obscurity. My main question is why do I think about suicide, since , despite being relatively happy apposed to others. Im not hard on myself and have spent my entire life adapting. I have had to learn things about myself. I guess no matter what I do the feelings of unwantedness will always lurk. Every time I think I want to kill myself no matter how hysterical I am there isnt the switch of the unconscious survival instinct that switches off like it did years ago. I want therapy and will have to wait til I am . I think my life will be better when I move out obviously. But these unwanted feelings and suicidal thoughts never will. Just an itch in the back. Something that will never allow me to be perfect or feel perfect or clean. Rant over. Another rant on the subreddit.
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once again, im here at my house. alone. with nobody to talk to, while my sister goes out to a party. any ideas on what i should do to pass the time? something other than video games, sleeping, watching youtube.
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Goodbye Reddit. Goodbye teenagers. No, this isn't a suicide post. I've found that reddit distracts me from my work. I've taken a break from it before, but now I am deleting it. I hope you all have fantastic lives. Stay positive and motivated. Goodbye everyone!
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STOP. BEING. SO. FUCKING. NICE. or I'll fall in love with u
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Hitting myself has become a new habitI am really disappointed with the way my life has turned out and i feel i can't go back. That pain of regret causes extreme anger and disgust at myself. My inability to form relationships has led to a painful life experience. As a result i keep hitting myself in the face and it hurts.
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Thoughts on frogs? I think they taste great but my friend disagrees, what do you think?
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My life is going great. So why am I crying?I was diagnosed with a severe panic disorder and major depressive disorder a few years ago, but for a while, everything has been going wonderful for me. I have a great boyfriend of months whom I'm going to visit this summer, I have a job I love, I've been working out and eating healthy foods every day without slacking, my family loves me, my friends are supportive, I'm addiction-free, I quit smoking and I haven't needed therapy in months. But it's :AM and I can't stop kicking my sheets off of my body and I'm frustrated and upset and angry and I really don't know why. Can someone please help?
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Feel a bit hollowLike the title says, I just feel a bit hollow. This past month has been rather rough for me academically, emotionally, and physically. I'm only in Junior year in High School, but I've been depressed since I was twelve. I have OCD that I have to take medication for, and anxiety as well as anorexia. This past month I've taken the SAT (and probably failed), been broken up with by my boyfriend (who I felt was the only person who understood what I was going through) and lost about eight pounds. I can't eat. Everything makes my stomach hurt and I just feel listless and sick. I'm constantly crying for no reason at all, and I can't stand much more of this to be honest. I have a therapist that I see once a week, but I don't feel like it's doing anything for me. My parents are very supportive, and are trying to give me all the help they can. I feel like a burden, like I'm not contributing anything to anyone. I just feel so hollow and caved out and I don't know what to do with myself anymore.
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I'm nearly years old, earned my BA, but have only worked part-time retail jobs and I'm sick of it**Title Edit: I earned my BA four years ago** I honestly don't know what to do to go about getting a real adult job, and at this point, I don't even know if it's possible. I'm sick of living at home and what to move out and be a proper adult. I don't want to live in this town anymore. It makes me feel suicidal. I've been working on developing a portfolio, and learning skills through MOOCs and sites like [Free Code Camp]( but I don't know how viable this will be now that Net Neutrality is going away. Also, they'll probably laugh at my resume and throw it in the trash can when they see I don't have a BS in Computer Science I'm so sick of retail and having to deal with a myriad of people everyday. I hate that I've only worked a job that high schoolers can work. I'm sick of seeing people from my childhood. My self-esteem is so low and I hate myself for it. Why can't I just be a normal adult?
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No purpose in my life. There is no job that I want. There is no career Ive ever thought sounded interesting. There are no goals for my future. Im just alive. Just being. If I could sit on the top of a snowy mountain in silence for the rest of my life Id be more than content. Sometimes I close my eyes and imagine myself there and I feel at peace for a little bit. Theres nothing I want or need from life. Life feels very useless. I want to live but everything feels out of place and I dont feel I belong here. This life just wasnt meant for me.
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Imagine not knowing how to post Smh couldnt be me
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Just wrote my suicide letter.After a while feeling anything but loneliness and pain I've been thinking a lot about, I'm going to end this soon. Felt I did everything that I could. I wrote a lot here but deleted it. This was the first place that I searched for talk about this, I felt like a ghost until now.
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I need help (maths) Ik it's a stupid idea to post it but I've been stuck on this for a few hours: Make x the subject of y = (x + ) / (x^ - )
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whats the easiest way too kill oneself the easiest accsessible and painless
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ite yall non virgins does it hurt for the first time? does it hurt for the dick and vachina
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Im not doing okayI dont know what to do. I just feel so hopeless. I feel pathetic that im writing a reddit post and crying about it but i just cant keep doing this. Every time i try to get better or attempt to turn my life back around i get pulled back down. Its like im running on a treadmill going nowhere. I know suicide is not the answer, and i know deep down i dont want to die but i just feel as if there is nothing left for me. Im afraid im going to hurt myself. And i know how incredibly selfish all of this is but i just dont know any more. Im writing this on a throwaway account. Im a teenager in the uk and initially i thought that lockdown was the best thing for my mental health but i now see that im really not okay anymore. Im no longer making progress. This doesnt even make any sense. There is no point to this post. Im just very confused and need some help.
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i want to give a boy head >:( i think thats very romantic, yed
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i honestly love the taste of blood like i could eat the shit for breakfast, lunch AND dinner
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I'm not killing myself tonight, or tomorrow, or MondayIf I'm entirely honest with myself, I will have to reevaluate on Tuesday and go from there, but I at least have a reason to live through the weekend. I will survive until Tuesday for my roommate who needs someone to love him while he's hurting. I will wait to remove myself until he his stable. And I'm ok with that.
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Why do cops always seem to have a nice butt Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word Word
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Never had a job, can't find one. Haven't finished a semester of school in years. I'm a loser. Should I just kill myself?I'm sitting here debating on whether or not to jump off the nearest bridge. I really think the world, and my family, would be better off without me. I cost my mother a lot of time and money. I haven't spoken to my dad in years but I doubt he cares. I'm probably the biggest disappointment in both of their lives. It's probably better if I kill myself.
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What does suicide by hanging feel like?I've read in a lot of places that it is painless, many hallucinate, hear music, see themselves dancing, etc. But many others say it is very, very painful, one of the worst ways to commit suicide. I'm just curious as to what you guys think, I'm looking for people who have tried, not just people making guesses.. Thanks (:
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I just don't know what to doI just need to let it out. I dunno what to do. My current relationship is falling apart. All of my relationships have fallen apart. I mess everything up because I hate myself, and it just makes me hate myself more. No one can love someone who is like that, I get it. I really don't think I'm good enough to ever get myself together, I'm too weak and let things get to me and fall into being a useless burden over and over. I've been like this forever, I tell myself I'm gonna try harder and it never happens. I was depressed before I ever had real reason to be, and then life has come in and kicked me around, like everyone else, which I'm pretty sure has made me worse. I know everything I could do to make things better, I just don't. I need help and I know no one else can do it for me, but I just don't have the energy to do anything about it. I moved from my hometown to be with my current BF, his whole family lives here. They are nice but I don't know who to talk to. I have no real friends here, just acquaintances. I don't think any of these people need to hear about the problems my BF and I are having. I hate dragging other people down. I just wish I could make him happy, but I get depressed and screw up. Last time we fought he told me to kill myself and just get it over with. I said mean things too. He apologized and said he didn't mean it. But I really think he's right. He's not home, because he hasn't been alot lately. I don't want him to come home and find me dead cause that's an awful thing to do to someone, but at the same time, I kind of do. :( Edit: and see this is my problem, because as soon as I post this, I immediately feel guilty for making anyone read my whining. How do I stop feeling so guilty for existing all the time?
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Oh god oh fuck I did it Im gonna regret this
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Idk whats life with coronaSitting in the tub with a long knife. Whats stopping me from splitting my veins into many? Ive been feeling real sad and alone and Im feeling a burden to my gf. At this point i dont wanna bother anyone and just go away.... but i mean too much to people. Should i care?
suicide
how do i get out of thisim stuck with nothing in my life. im not close to my family. i never leave the house. my friends are online. i cant find love, although i have good hygiene. its never anyones fault except my own. i need help. i take medicine. i see a therapist. its not enough. i need real help.
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What the fuck is wrong with those apartments I can fucking hear my neighbors talking. Fuck the people who did those fucking walls on those fucking buildings.
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I want to dance to the song "Crusin'" with a girl It's such a dreamy and soulful song and I could just imagine dancing with a girl while listening to it.
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Day of posting in this subreddit until im . Yeah day . to go. Questions will be answered as always.
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i just played mc w someone for like hours i cried laughing. it was too funny
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I can't picture a futureI'm a year old female and I've never been in a relationship, I'm failing school and don't see a future at all. maybe I should just end it...
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Hey guys I finally got laid Off my job will do anything to earn money plz help
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RipIm going to hang myself off my back deck.
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Gun to your head, what are your last words? Im curious as to how you guys would think in a moment like this. What would you say? (Serious post)
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Im tired.Im tired of hurting myself and others. Whether it be physically or mentally Im just tired of it. Im tired of the inevitability that is you cant live without hurting. Ceasing to exist is the only solution I can muster up. Obviously I dont want to or else I wouldnt be here. I know things will get better and blah blah blah. But they will get worse again too. I dont like the cycle. I dont like the game. I know ending my life wouldnt do anything but hurt people far beyond what I can comprehend... so why cant I get past the idea. The thoughts feel like a song stuck in my head except theres no music and no lyrics. Theres nothing and its on repeat. Fuck Im going too deep.
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Im finally ready to dieFor weeks Ive been feeling like stuff shouldnt have happened, nothing feels real because I should have died years ago. Life is meaningless and the world would be better off without me and no one would care anyway. I dont feel anything but sadness and numbness anymore so whats the point.
suicide
I just want someone to tell me its going to be okIm so alone. I realized I was transgender a couple of years ago. I kept it a secret from everyone but it blew my world apart. I still havent told anyone about it, but the dysphoria seems to be getting worse. I also have Aspergers and have trouble making friends, though I do have a couple. But one of the things that helped keep me going was my friendly co-workers in the supermarket I used to work in. I got a new job in IT but the people arent as warm and friendly and I dont feel like I fit in. I discovered recently that my parents are likely narcissists, and my upbringing explains a lot about my low self-esteem and ability to deal with stress, etc. They will probably disown me when they find out Im trans, and it will probably kill me. Even though Im not physically dependent on them, I still am tied to them emotionally. I just cant see any way out. Either I keep going the way I am and continue to get worse and kill myself. Or I attempt to transition and end up killing myself from the fall out of losing my family, abuse, etc. Either way I lose. I just need someone to talk to me, to tell me I can do this. I dont know if it will help but Im kind of having an emotional breakdown of sorts.
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Feels like I'm at the end.I've been struggling with severe depression for years now. I've reached the point where I can't take it anymore and things in my life are bad enough to where I'm considering ending it. I was supposed to be graduating college next week. I'm , I took a break from college to work. This was supposed to be the time I finally finished college, and started life on my own. Then COVID happened, my internship got cancelled and everything got pushed back. On top of that my two internships are all I have to complete now and since I can't take them at the same time, I'm losing my full time status which means losing my Financial Aid. All this work over the last couple years just to get shut down at the end because of something completely out of my control. There's other stuff too, the severe anxiety and panic attacks I've been dealing with for years, one of my only close friends straight up turned her back on me and stopped talking to me. I didn't take care of myself growing up and now have major tooth issues (multiple broken teeth, messed up teeth etc.) I can't smile and If I ever want to date someone what girl wants a guy with messed up teeth? I also don't have health insurance because college student so it's not like I can go get it fixed. There's also a lot of deeper stuff that I'm not gonna go into here because i'm not here to write a novel. I have Asperger's Syndrome. Talking to people has always been an issue for me. I don't really have anything in terms of friends. I feel so alone. I love my family, I don't want to hurt them, but I don't know what to do anymore. Everything's just piled up and I feel trapped with no way out. Everyday right now feels like it's just a struggle to survive. I'm so tired of feeling this way every single day. I have no energy left and I'm done fighting.
suicide
Cant take the stress anymoreI want to live more than anything but i cant live how Im living right now. I have visibly enlarged lymph nodes everywhere which I worry about daily and now I find a much bigger one under my arm. On top of that I have pain everytime I eat to the point where Im now in permanent pain (there seems to be like a lasting pain that gets much worse after I eat)I was going to go to the er for it and then get an ultrasound on the new lymph node but Ill just end up worrying again bc I cant get a straight % answer for the lymph nodes. I have dreams which I want to achieve and Ive always been optimistic all throughout my life. Without all this I would be the happiest person ever but I cant take the stress anymore.
suicide
I wish I was born a girl Dunno, guess it be that time of day
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Sorry. For I have sinned Guys. My fellow comrade's. I have become the creepy simp. As some of you know a fairly attractive female posted a picture of her without braces on. And I found her mega attractive. And all the sudden I find myself texting her saying braces suck and must be a relief to get them off.(I recently go them taken off.) And i eventually gave her my snap. Foolish mistake. She probably found me creepy. She hasn't replied. (I'm btw and she looks around my age) so I'm sorry gang. I have simped and failed
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This is the closest I have ever gotten.I know I've suffered from either depression or anxiety or some combination for the last few years. After my first year in law school, things just got profoundly worse. I hate where I go to school because I just don't get along with my classmates. All of my friends live me than , miles from me, and I just have **no one** here. I've tried so hard to be outgoing, polite, friendly, and fun to be around, but law students are some of the most vapid and one-dimensional people you will ever meet in your life--especially the ones at a state university. Anyway, the most recent turn of events have just sent me over the edge. For the last week, I've been a veritable zombie...I had to put alcohol in my coffee just to be able to feel something in the morning at class. I come home everyday and cry. I tried transferring over the summer, but my grades just weren't good enough. I was rejected from every school to which I applied for transfer. While that in itself stings, the real baseball bat to the face just happened: it turns out my school made a mistake with my grades. The reason I couldn't transfer wasn't because of my own lack of academic fortitude, it was my professors' inability to do their fucking jobs. That said, it's too late to appeal the decisions, since classes are beginning everywhere on Monday. So, I'm stuck here and I'm absolutely fucking miserable. I have no idea what to do...I'm just so depressed right now, and I have no one to talk to at all.
suicide
Yeah, I Lift L: stay in my room for hours at a time I: F: T:
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some ppl havent left their house since march, think about that id go insane
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I got shanked with disease knife yesterday My mom picked me up at the bus stop, and picked up my sister early at her school (she goes to elementary th grade, I'm in high school th grade). We went to the doctor's and got some off brand Pringles at the nearby dollar store :D
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Yesterday was a bad day, There's no point to life with days like thatHad work early in the morning, worked for hours, came home, got my stuff for school and left after sitting for about an hour. School didn't go so well, I misread what was due today and didn't have it to turn in. Called up the woman who sold me her car last week, she still doesn't have the title transferred to her name so she can sign the title over to me. I feel like the bitch is just fucking with me at this point. "She was too sick to work or go to the DMV" Parked in a handicap spot for no more than - minutes to see a friend and came out to a cop writing me a dollar ticket. I was even at my car before he stepped out of his. The asshole wouldn't even give me a warning so I'll have to take it to appeals court. I was late for my soccer game at :pm Yesterday was an abnormally shitty day. Life has no good in it and I don't need shit like this kicking me while I'm down. School is overwhelming me. I'm working way too much but every time I ask to get my hours cut back they don't do it. I'm still having problems trying to get a girlfriend. years old and in college and I can't get a girl, pathetic isn't it? I can't drown my sorrow in booze or weed. They just don't agree with my body and I feel off/sick/sleepy. Not a pleasant experience. When you're down, life likes to kick you. Everyone is out there for their own greed.
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I Tried to Commit Suicide by Cop one Year agoIt was the th of December , it was so close to actually happen, my plan was about to work but a gunshot that was aimed to scare me stunned me right in my track. I was a second away from pulling out the fake gun, I was tackled from behind before I was able to, I was immediately arrested and sent to the suicide ward and later the psychiatric hospital. I didn't know it at the time but I was in a state of psychosis, I had already been suicidal for a very long time but it was the state of psychosis that actually put my plan into action.
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[M] Hi, trying to meet people again. Text if you want (Repost) Hi everyone, I'm just trying to meet people again so it might fail. Anyways I live in AZ and I mostly enjoy games, politics and watching youtube. I can be nice so I really don't mind texting, just be between -. Nobody will reach out but I'll still try. I'm reposting this again because only girls get attention so you're all pathetic like that, but whatever.
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It's weird. Even when I don't necessarily feel depressed, the thoughts are still there.I guess a part of me just knows it's inevitable. A lot of the time, I feel like I'm mourning for my own death.
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I need some motivation Can you guys motivate me in the comments please?
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The plan was to drink until the pain over But what's worse, the pain or the hangover?
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Looking for advice for someone in a situationThis isn't for me - I'm looking for advice for another poster whose long-distance girlfriend may be in an alarming situation: Short version: he's in a long distance relationship with a girl who has a bad home life and has made a suicide attempt before. Tonight, she said this to him, and then ended their conversation: "Mark I don't know when and If we will ever talk again but I love you. I don't have time to explain so bye" I tried to give him the best advice I could, which was to contact someone near her or call the police, because someone needed to check on her. If someone could provide any advice to him, it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance!
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Why do I feel like thisIm so fuck tired of feeling numb Im tired of having no emotions Im tired of fighting for the will to live when all I do is fuck up every single fucking day. I was just told told by someone very close to me that they should have let me kill my self. And I starting to think they are right. I feel empty but I have thing to be happy about but Im to empty to be happy. I feel like no amount of meds or therapy could help.
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