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Feeling like I’m stuck in a rut
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I’ve been having a really hard time mentally recently. I am university student who is finishing my degree this semester. I have had little structure this semester with mostly online school and no job this semester. I find the more structure I have the better it is for my mental health (as most people). I am someone who is happiest when I am social, with my friends and family around me as well as when I am active. I have always played a lot of sports and found that to be a great outlet. Lately, the past few months I’ve been in a rut. My anxiety, derealization, and dissociation has been really intense and I’ve stopped wanting to fight it every day. I’ve gotten so exhausted of coaching myself through every step of the day. The past few weeks I have just stopped fighting it and have been staying inside and succumbing ti my panicked thoughts. I just started medication about a month ago for anxiety (have never tried before) and can’t tell if it’s making it better or worse. I also am going through a break up, graduating and moving. I have a lot of huge life changes happening right now so that could be a factor too. I have stopped wanting to do things that I love because I’ve stopped fighting the fear, I’ve let it consume me. I have stopped hanging out with friends the past few weeks. I’m worried I’m on a path to isolating myself. I need to get myself out of this rut but am struggling. I know the best way to do it is to face my fears but I’m so exhausted. Also I have a therapist but we only talk ever few weeks. I’m also supposed to be going to Italy in less than two weeks with my family but as of right now I can barely walk down the street. I’m so worried and exhausted. Any advice or words of encouragement?
| 3 |
On and off anxiety and depressive episode
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I've been experiencing anxiety symptoms more intensely over the past few weeks, and have recently started to see a new psychiatrist. They know that i've already been on escitalopram (jovia) for a few years and have only recently weened off of it. It's been only three or four months since I stopped taking the medication. Now, I'm not sure if I need to go back, but I'm afraid. I feel almost ashamed that i haven't gotten better (even though I know there's nothing to be ashamed of).
Has anyone else been in a similar situation?
| 2 |
does that little need to isolate yourself from people you know ever pop up?
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whenever i get sad, i always feel the immediate need to ensure no one tries to contact me, that i dont get tempted to contact them, and that if they do contact me i must absolutely ignore them at all costs. does anyone else get this? usually motivated by a feeling of not wanting to be a burden, not wanting them to know how im currently feeling (even if its obvious), and believing they hate me. not looking for help, just curious if other people do the same. i know its absolutely a depression or anxiety thing, so i figured here would be the best place for it.
| 8 |
Can you get traumatized from a toxic job that lasted only 5 weeks?
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I have done a few jobs since graduation and I'd say 3 of them were severely toxic. The last one left me almost suicidal and I needed more than year so far to recover from the trauma. I had a few decent jobs too so I know it's not me. At my last job I was excluded, bullied, overworked and I went in wanting to kill myself every day. Every night I called my mother to cry and tell her I dont want to be here anymore. The thing is, this last job only lasted 5 weeks. I wonder if it was enough for this one job to cause all this trauma. Or if it was more because all the other aspects of my life sucked too. My relationship had ended, my cat died in a horrible accident, my mental health was already unstable and I was terrified of ending up alone and jobless. The anxiety I had from those other 2 jobs also doesn't help.
Have you ever been traumatized by a job that only lasted for a short while and how long did it take you to find a new job?
| 11 |
I just want to live
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No need to accomplish anything.
No schedule, no deadlines, no hurry.
It's hard to slowdown when you feel you have to acheive goals all the time.
I am grateful I have everything I need and more.
I need to stop chasing goals.
I am loved, I am healthy and that is all that really matters.
Accomplishments are not selfworth.
| 4 |
HOW TO FUCKING CHILL
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I don't think I have any air in my lungs
I can't breathe I woke up and my hands were shaking the whole day I'm frustrated and I feel like I'm about to explode I feel like my eyes are about to pop out of my face I feel like I'm in a hurry for something but I've nothing that I'm waiting for or must do I just need to chill I want to calm down but I can't and it's driving me insane every little thing that happens bother me turns me so sad and depressed what is wrong with me
| 11 |
Karate grading
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Anxiety
Hi
I've just joined. I'm a 7th Kyu, training Goju Ryu (IOGKF).
So I have generalised anxiety disorder amongst other disorders, and gradings in karate really stress me out. I get quite upset when instructors put others or me under pressure when doing stuff in gradings, and the staring at me or others feels really intimidating. It just feels really uncomfortable and unnecessary. Are gradings supposed to make you feeling so intimidated?
Constructive criticism is always appreciated but please don't be harsh. I'm just trying my best as we all are 😊
| 2 |
i keep forgetting everything that im doing today, is this a common symptom of DPDR, truama or anxiety???
| null | 2 |
Feeling hopeless and alone
|
A lot of feelings have come to surface today and I am reaching out because I need words of encouragement.
I have a good support system with family and friends but they are tired of listening to my issues. I'm looking into talk therapy but haven't decided yet on a therapist and been feeling overwhelmed about the decision.
I am dealing with rejection from a romantic interest that I know I self sabotaged. I showed my vulnerability, anger and frustration in a drunken stupor, said things I didn't mean and although I've apologized, I haven't gotten a response and it's eating me alive. I regret wholeheartedly but the guilt and shame is beyond anything I can handle right now. I'm embarrassed about my actions and I don't know how much more I need to say or do to get back in their good graces.
| 3 |
How do you find out what your hobbies are if you're not interested in anything?
|
I'm diagnosed with severe depression, GAD and ADHD. It's been a rough decade for me. I've been depressed the last ten years, to the point where if my doctors don't get a response from me they phone in a welfare check to see if I'm okay.
I remember that I had hobbies, i see the evidence lying around. I'm considering selling everything I have for a bit of cash because I invested a lot into my hobbies when I was still interested in something. Or maybe I was just trying to buy dopamine? And by that I mean maybe I was willing to spend money on something that I had a little bit of interest in in the hopes that it continued to spark an interest.
I know I should find a hobby. But when nothing, not food, not exercise, interests you, how do you find out what you like doing? I'm only interested in sleeping and my cats. If I got rid of everything that didn't spark joy, I'd be homeless with a bed and three cats under a bridge somewhere.
I need to find something so I feel like I'm living.
| 9 |
I tried i really did and i never learn and I don't think im going to ever be okay
|
I haven't been officially diagnosed for anything. Ive been on anxiety meds for 6 months and Im in therapy for self harm and suicidal thoughts.
Ill be real. I tried for the past months to get better. its not working. i tried gaslighting myself. I still feel it i still trust blindly i still have hope and i hate myself for it. I relapsed from sh and have been doing it for the month. I have all fake people surrounding me but i still love them. I had my birthday and it made me hate myself even more. The pills don't do anything. the therapist doesn't help. I don't feel like any of my doctors or phycologist does not understand me. she listens to how i feel but doesn't give me tools to help myself, im stuck in this vicious cycle of i want to die i want to die i want to die. I don't deserve anything. Im wasting my parents resources.
| 15 |
Need some advise
|
Hey everyone
I need some help regarding my mental health. I've struggled with anxiety and depression for over five years. I was having some really good months in terms of managing both, however I haven't felt so good lately. I think I'm entering some sort of depressive episode and my anxiety is making me have some really unwanted intrusive thoughts about hurting myself and others. I'm pretty much alone and I know I'm not gonna have much human contact in at least a month. I'm scared of these thoughts and of not being able to keep the under control while being by myself.
Does anyone have some tips on how to handle intrusive thoughts?
| 0 |
What my life is.
|
My life feels like a vortex. It just goes round and round, always going in the same cycle. No one will learn that I have depression and anxiety. Please, someone give me advice.
| 0 |
First time post
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Hi Everyone.
First time post as really first time I have accepted the facts of my anxiety. I am seeking medical help for the first time as I am exhausted of just trying to cope with it.
I used to getting quite stressed when I was younger but whilst my parents saw my behaviour, it was never really discussed. I used to wash my hands until they bled and fear touching door handles because of germs. It then developed into fear of forgetting things and so I would write reams of pages of reminder notes that I left on my bedroom floor. Many of them saying the same thing.
It died down a bit in my teens and twenties until I had children and it has resurfaced but in a different form. I have begun to constantly worry about irrational things like I cannot turn things off in the house or lock doors as I can’t stop thinking that maybe I didn’t do it. I can’t park the car on the driveway without getting my wife to check I put the hand real on right. There are lots of things like this.
I have recently been made redundant at work and know I need to find a new job but the idea terrifies me and I get so angry for like half an hour and then so sad that I often just go back to bed.
So this is why I am seeking professional help and I hoped telling you all a little would help me get used to talking about it too. My wife knows and is supportive and is pleased I am doing something at last. She’s never judgmental or pushing me which I appreciate.
Just wondering if this chimes with anyone here?
| 2 |
I changed myself but DEPRESSION and Anxiety won't leave
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I'm so confused and depressed, even tho I made a huge change with my life.
I was addicted to gaming and was doing nothing allday , I have been through alot mentally this last year and a half.
I start working out at the gym , eat healthy , working as a real estate agent and try to fight the negative toughts and the fears I have infront of people.
but I always have fears from anything , I really like dancing or laughing with people about stuff , but automatically I'm getting closed around people even the most closest friends , I feel in a cage, I want to be another person but I can't really express nyself around others , even at my work I have fears and negative thoughts everyday and they won't leave it leads to depression and makes me so mad sometimes I even cry and asks why..
I just woke up early and went to the gym and was mad all the way to there I was thinking how tf can I work on myself to be happier?
I watched lots of healthcare tips about anxiety and depression but nothing really helps.
I read about antidepressants and I'm really afraid to take those if I will be diagnosed and need to..
I read about thr side effects and it can make a sex dysfunction , I don't want to relay on something to be happy , I'm just lost ..
I have no one to speak with it about
No family , No friends , I'm complete alone I feel lonely and sad and I just want to know how can I realy work on myself because I tried so many stuff but nothing worked and really made me happy all of this was just a big mask that I had to hide from my family and friends but IM TIRED
| 4 |
Anxiety flare up with physical health issues
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Hello. I'm 29 years old and have had a history of anxiety and depression. I was on meds for 9 months between 2021-2022. That's when I was finally able to understand my symptoms as a mental health concern and not just a regular part of life.
I've been in regular therapy since 2021 as well. And I'm practicing mindfulness consistently too. I'd been in a really great and positive mindspace most of 2022. Recently a lot of big changes are happening in my life and that has triggered more anxiety again. Racing thoughts, restlessness, fear about the future, etc. Have physically not been keeping too well either. Earlier it was stress induced gastritis and that was beginning to settle when I caught a stomach flu a couple days ago and while I'm recovering from that slowly I worry it's taking too long and I need to get back to a good shape to be able to keep up with the things I need to attend to. I've not been able to sleep well for a month (barring the flu time). Even small triggers around make me start crying or feeling extremely bad for myself. And while I tell myself this is okay, it's just a passing moment and try giving myself space to just be and let time and present moment awareness do their thing, sometimes it feels to painful to be able to cope with all especially during the physical symptoms. My therapist has helped me massively during all this and we have worked on a bunch of grounding techniques, breathwork, reframing negative self talk work. Those definitely help a lot. But sometimes it still gets difficult.
How do I maintain resilience and hope amongst all this? I keep fearing that I'll crumble anytime I'm going through any stressful situations in life and I won't be able to make much of opportunities that come around or spend meaningful fun time with people I care about. Also the pressure to feel okay and better asap is very annoying. The world's not pausing for me.
Edit: I also feel the pressure to feel more in control when I'm putting in so much effort to do all the right things.
TLDR: Big changes in my life have created an increase in anxiety levels and I'm struggling to give it the time and space it needs while battling with feelings of hopelessness.
| 2 |
2 months
|
Hi everyone, I am just here to get some help or advice regarding my current situation.
It was nearly 2 months ago when I started questioning and experiencing anxiety. I came back from a holiday to my home country and started questioning things about my relationship, more on the lines of if I'm truly in love with my gf or am do I just view her In a sexual way. This caused me to experience a feeling of worry and fear and could feel it in my chest, anytime I'd talk to my gf to anytime I get "aroused" I'd get this feeling of worry and fear (at that time I didn't know this was anxiety and could only describe it in those 2 words), this anxiety kept growing and growing, and the topics of worry keep changing, I then worried about what if I was gay, this caused me extreme anxiety for some reason, I missed 3 weeks of classes and stayed at home and couldn't go out, everytime I'd look at someone (male) I'd get so anxious and distressed and fearfull, and recently my most distressing topic yet is I am fearing over whether I am a pedo, idk how this train of thought manifested, but this current fear and anxiety unlike the other 2 is followed on by immense guilt to the point where I considered ending it all. Idk why or what to do, Idk who to ask for help regarding this.
| 3 |
I think I ruined my birthday
|
So today is my birthday, I celebrated it together with my sisters birthday this year cause mum was gone on my sisters b-day and these two dates are actually pretty close together so... yeah, we just gone with it.
Well, in the beggining everything was allright, we had nice lunch at home, two cakes and we blew off the candles together with my sister. It was pretty fun.
But then we decided to head out into the one HP themed caffee, I thought I will be fine but the sun was shinning so brightly and there was just too many people. I felt overhelmed and anxious and I wanted to cry and scream.
Well, we sat down, ordered some drings and desserts ad then was time to open pressents from mum. She was creative, she got us both voucher (my sister some beaty salon and I got meeting with penguins) but mum shove copies of these vouchers into empty vine bottle. Like message in the bottle. It was pretty creative and nice.
My sister was able to get her paper out without much trouble but I was not. My paper got stuck halfway through and I just couldnt get it out. Mum told me to break the bottle (it was her original plan that we both would have break the bottle to get the voucher out) but I was almost crying because I felt incompetent and I just had the feeling like everyone were watching me and judging me.
So my mum and sister went out of the caffee to break the bottle for me.When they got back mum handed me the voucher and that was it. It was supposed to be fun but I ruined it and I dont even know why I wasnt able to break that damn bottle. The worst part is that my sisters bff was there too and now I feel like he hates me.
After we got home and I got my breath under control I apologized to mum for ruining her surprise. She told me that I didnt ruin anything but I dont quite belive her I saw disappoitment in her face when I gave up on getting out the paper from the bottle. I feel terible. I dont know why I'm like this. I should have just man up and brake it..
Anyway sorry for this post I just needed to went somewhere.
| 4 |
Jobs?
|
Hi! Do you guys have any suggestions on how I could make some money as a person struggling with anxiety and depression?
| 5 |
Change
|
When I cry it effects me a lot.. like I feel the way I feel. I shouldn’t feel like I have to change my style just cause u feel the need to think it’s what’s best.. because that’s not who I am.. I know who I am and I don’t wanna be confused or being put in a situation of changing what I wear for anyone..
| 3 |
I have no more meds
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My psych didn’t renew my prescription so and I just ran out of my meds today. The offices are closed till Monday and I tried calling Friday but I couldn’t get through to anyone. I work everyday till Wednesday and I won’t see my psych till Friday. Idk what to do for the next 3 days. I’m currently taking 15 mg of lexapro. I have a hard time getting up without meds.
| 2 |
Help me understand what I am feeling
|
I battle with anxiety and depression. Today something bad happened that left me with this...feeling...
For the first time I feel this void. This nothingness. That peace that comes with thinking that if I could disappear for a little bit, it would be great. I feel peace with the idea of feeling nothing... I am scared.
I am already going to a psychologist... What do I do with this??? How do I cope with it?
Thanks in advance for your advice!
| 6 |
Weekly Mod Post - Success Stories/Progress Saturday
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Happy Saturday Everyone!
This is a recurring weekly post for everyone to post something positive. Do you have a success story you would like to share? Have you made positive progress towards goals you have set for yourself? Do you want to share something positive with the sub in order to encourage others? This is the place for that!
Share anything positive on this post. This is a place to share your successes, encourage others, and to bring an upbeat and positive outlook.
| 2 |
Changing meds
|
Has anyone dealt with this where you were on something that was actually helping then taken off for something else or nothing at all? I was taken off clonazepam after being on it for close to a decade, yeah I did get to ween off before being totally off, and had it replaced with buspirone. This started the beginning of last August, and to this day I feel the effects. It def does not work as well nowhere close. I've also developed alot of.hand/finger twitching that I to this day still have. She *the doc* absolutely refuses to put me back on it out of claims of discovering bad things about it. She suggested to find a psychiatrist to get it from them but I for my life can't find 1 no matter how long and hard I've looked, only psychologists, no psychiatrists. Another thing is I haven't slept well ever since this medication change, and it just fucks with everything and makes it that much worse. Sigh...
| 6 |
What anxiety really is...
| null | 160 |
Wellbutrin and kratom
|
Hello friends!
Let me start off by saying I have been in a few car accidents, so I have chronic back and neck pain from herniated discs, annular tears, and more I won’t get into. I have taken Vicodin, Percocet, tramadol, all of the pain relievers in the past for this pain. I recently started Wellbutrin about 4 days ago and have heard that the interaction is not great with pharmaceutical pain medication. I am reading a lot about Kratom and how it has the same pain relieving affect without having to take an opioid. Does anyone have any experience with this? I have never taken kratom before but I’m willing to try if it’s going to be better than taking pills. Is it better to just take my pills because of the reaction? I need help haha!!
| 3 |
Help with anxiety
|
So basically everytime someone coughs, I get anxiety and literally try to distance myself from them. I’m sure it’s a product of the pandemic, but ever since I’ve been so anxious to get sick because I hate the feeling. I want to go back to where I wasn’t extremely afraid of getting sick and getting a spike of anxiety every time someone coughs. Any advice on this would help.
| 1 |
I feel guilty
|
I feel guilty because of something I plan to do, it's not that big of a deal, but subcouncously I feel extreme guilt over that and I have trouble sleeping. I wake up early and turn around in bed for hours.
Everybody I talked to tell me that it's all fine, even my gf, but I think it's the way I was raised where I would be shamed by my family every time I try to put my own needs first. I learned how to be invisible, I was also lonely during my whole childhood and now I feel extreme anxiety every time I'm about to step outside of my comfort zone and do something that only I want, without trying to please anyone else.
| 5 |
Previously posted about my SO posting my panic attacks.
|
So yes, I posted in a previous account how my SO would take to Reddit to post intimate details of my panic attack and when I asked him to stop after finding the posts he claimed it was a big deal because it was “anonymous”. Meanwhile I am battling SI and am reading people saying I’m a terrible person. Fast forward, my SO had an episode where they were screaming and speaking quickly and it really scared me (they didn’t know I was home we have our own rooms). He blamed me saying if I would’ve told him I was home he wouldn’t have had a meltdown/ wouldn’t have yelled. This left me physically shaking and scared for my well-being. I spend hours in bed just trying not to move in hopes that he wouldn’t realize I was here or awake. I wrote out my account to his therapist who said… we were abusing eachother. I was shocked tbh. I’ve never said anything negative to him unless I was in the middle of s panic attack with him shaking me and asking what’s wrong. I will admit I lashed out. In addition to that I’m abusive for finding his Reddit account where he posted all of my panic attacks even when I asked him to. Tbh throughout this whole thing he had openly said he’s happy meanwhile I have lost 16.8 lbs since February 26th, I’m now on antidepressants, and I am still battling persistent SI.
I am wondering if he painted me the same wya he did with my panic attacks online to his therapist. I’ve noticed that whenever I speak of this it is usually centered around my trauma but he only every talk about me. It’s very heartbreaking. I’ve asked him to clarify what I do so I know and he had nothing to say. I’ve decided maybe just staying away from him for a while is best. He is constantly violating my boundaries and I need to take care of myself.
| 3 |
Opening sub to the public
|
Yes, you read that right. The sub is now open. You can make posts, write comments and share memes. The sub was restricted due to lack of moderation. A new mod team has been assembled. We'll be changing some stuff in the background and I'll keep you updated on that. So keep an eye out for that. We'll set new rules and guidelines after extensive discussion. Until then remember the human. Keep the content civil and respectful.
Anyway, that's enough from me. I'm looking forward to getting to know all of you and hearing your stories. If you have any questions, concerns, or just want to say hi, feel free to shoot me a message.
From your friendly neighbourhood mod,
Leo
| 15 |
I feel helpless
|
F(24) USA
Have struggled since 2016 with anxiety/depression.
2017-2020 Zoloft (150mg) Buspirone (didn’t use never helped)
I somewhat manage life stressors but unhealthy using marijuana as a daily coping mechanism. (Since 17 years old)
2020 Tells doc I am over being a zombie, want help, he tapers me off Zoloft then ghosts me and says “get a psychiatrist” to someone with severe health anxiety
I raw dogged about 5 months until 2021,
took MDMA and the comedown sent me to a local Psych ER.
Was put on haloperidol and sent home that Sunday night. Monday morning I pick up prescription, take medication, have anaphylaxis and end up in ER again.
Restart let’s try Effexor and Klonopin.
I rarely used Klonopin during this period (2021) only on occasion as needed.
I gain over 60 pounds on Effexor, start to notice worsening symptoms of depression due to my body, anxiety heightens immensely regarding leaving home for long periods of time (traveling not working)
Mid 2022- I switch to Cymbalta.
Here I am now, unable to work, eat, shower, see friends family, and emotionally unstable.
Was in the hospital a month ago for anxiety and was also prescribed hydroxyzine 50 mg 3X a day. It’s just making me tired and unable to focus on my anxiety.
Just yesterday had a virtual appt with a Psychiatrist finally because I’m desperate for help and he 1) tells me immediately to stop 60 mg Cymbalta and notifies me that there are withdrawals. I have been a wreck ever since this news. He gives me a tapering schedule of taking 1 30mg daily for 2 weeks, then 1 every other day for 2 weeks, then immediately start Lexapro. 2.) he also diagnosed me with PPMD
I have an in person psychiatrist appt next Thursday as well as a gyno appt (first one ever as I’ve been terrified of it) but that feels like forever. I need help now.
I have been in some what of a crisis for over a week now. Scared to seek help because every time I’ve reached out I’ve been told it’s because I smoke marijuana and that’s it. Yesterdays appointment again was the same, and added stress of switching medicines again. My body is exhausted.
Im desperate for someone to see my pain. I wish anxiety was a visible illness and could be taken seriously.
Im debating going inpatient due to the stress of tapering and starting yet another medication. I cannot control my emotions whatsoever.
I don’t want to hurt myself or others, so I’m scared to admit myself and get all my rights taken from me. I know I need the hard help. The discipline and routine but I’m scared how long that could be. I don’t have self motivation and can’t commit to anything, and need someone forcing me in a positive way.
I feel so helpless. Is it my hormones? Is it my brain? Both?
Should I seek help if I cannot control my emotions, or do regular day to day tasks?
I feel guilty because my parents think I just need to suck it up and this is just a rough patch, but truth be told I’m exhausted, scared, unstable, confused, frustrated, and so many other words my brain is too flustered to think of.
| 6 |
Car anxiety
|
My son and I both had the flu around Christmas. In January we had covid. Then in February he got the flu again. I have been freaking out about germs even more. I stupidly read an article about how cars can make you sick by recycling the germs in the cabin. I have not been able to get in my car since then so about 2.5 months. I've been relying on my oldest son's car and my friend. It's really becoming a problem. Any advice?
| 5 |
not a great feeling when you hear your doctor say "I am at a loss for how to proceed."
| null | 3 |
Short term help
|
Two days ago, I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I've had a really tough time with studying for my finals (among other things) and concentration. I have appointments booked for therapy and am starting medication, but until then I am still really struggling to study for my next two finals ( one tomorrow and one next week). What are some ways I can improve my focus just to get through these exams? Are there any excersises you have found helpful for calming down anxiety and improving concentration on tasks and studying? Thanks!
| 4 |
I think my mom passed on her anxiety and depression to me
|
I know there can be a genetic component to this sort of thing, so I guess some amount of anxiety/depression was probably unavoidable for me. I realized recently, though, that a lot of the negative voices in my head are just saying the same sorts of things she said to me as a kid. It kind of feels like some of this could have been avoided. I wrote this song to process all of this, thought others here might relate too <3 [https://open.spotify.com/track/3UmSdmNYrLjX0HAxI6VbDe](https://open.spotify.com/track/3UmSdmNYrLjX0HAxI6VbDe)
| 3 |
Imposter syndrome
|
I'm about to graduate med school in like 2 months. I feel off. I don't know why I doubt myself. I don't feel like doing my normal studying and everything about my life has become less worth it. I just really want to go in my mothers arms and just be stroked by her on my head. I just feel like I need help, all my relationships and every aspect of my life is getting affected.
| 2 |
How *not* to help someone with anxiety
| null | 2 |
Panic attacks vs anxiety: What’s the difference?
| null | 2 |
It's me, I'm the problem.
|
So, I've been having a rough time lately. Especially with my mental health.
I have a husband and 2 children. I work 33 hours per week 4 x 7.5 hour days.
Am I wrong for wanting or needing more help?
My husband has a high paying job with great responsibilities. And it often takes him away for a night here and there sometimes more.
With these nights, comes social events. Where he gets to socialise with work colleagues and customers in a fun relaxed environment. Care free. All while I am bending over backwards trying to work my minimum wage job get my kids to school make sure they have everything they need, get everywhere they need to be, cooking and cleaning, washing and drying, etc. The stuff that is expected of a mother. I was doing that for as long as I could before I experienced burn out. I am now at the lowest I have ever been. Why can I not find a way out? Do I need to leave my entire situation? I don't feel valued or appreciated by my partner. I have told him what I need from him but I am still reminding him months later that I should be a priority (not always) but maybe once a week. I feel so lonely and isolated my kids are at the age that they don't really want to bother with me. They are either engrossed with technology or outside playing. I am so unhappy. I have been having health issues also and I don't know if it is all stress related. I don't know what to do.
And I sure as hell can't see a way out
| 36 |
What would you say to a friend that is trying to cope with anxiety?
|
Read this affirmation aloud, and try to place yourself as the friend you're telling this to: "You're doing your best, and your best is enough" 🌻
| 12 |
Ranflocs
|
Hello everyone!! So I have been put on 20mg of Ranflocks, just started today and had the WORST day!! Anxiety through the roof, tired, spaced out. Doc said I can take Alzam just the ease the side effects. Haven't taken one yet because of my anxiety! Sounds crazy I know! I forced myself to take one and I instantly felt a lot better. I know it takes 2-4 weeks for this antidepressant to work. But can anyone who has been/is on this drugs please share stories with me? Is it as horrible as Google says it is. I have been on Google for two days researching this antidepressant. Does it also make you pick up weight like crazy?? Please share stories so I don't feel so alone!
| 5 |
Is there any advice you can share for someone who doesn't have any friends he can talk to, no family members he can rely on, doesn't have anyone to share his worries?
| null | 9 |
My partner makes me feel even worse than I already do
|
My long term partner has PTSD, depression and anxiety, and has become EXTREMELY negative, angry and moody and sullen over the past 3-4 years.
Some days she's ok. Those days are easier as my own chronic anxiety, anhedonic depression, OCD, BPD, AvPD and CPTSD, can just kind of exist without having to deal with anything else.
Other days are crap. I literally get up (around 3pm or 4pm as usual due to the anhedonia and avoidance), come out of the bedroom, and she's grumpy, sulky, negative about EVERYTHING, complains and is sarcastic about stuff that admittedly IS annoying but we can't do anything about it. Any little thing I do that has nothing to do with her, she assumes is about her and gets grumpy about. I REFUSE to walk on eggshells! I didn't put them there.
I just withdraw even more, don't speak unless spoken to, say the bare minimum and just wait for her to eventually go to bed so I can be alone and relax.
This is just making me feel EVEN worse. I don't blame her as she's been traumatised, but...I cannot keep dealing with this.
| 8 |
I want to divorce my husband so I can be miserable alone.
|
Long story short, a surgeon disfigured me by injecting enzymes to my face, with time it just got worse and now after four months I look unrecognizable and look 10 years older. Whatever reaction it caused spread to my body causing skin thinning and muscle atrophy (ALL over my body) hands and arms look really veiny and wrinkled, breasts are soft and saggy,I lost a lot of hair as well and even my eyes changed in shape and color. I’m dealing with IBS and body pains.
I don’t go out of my house for the reasons stated above. I was a good looking woman and my husband is gorgeous… I can’t stand looking myself in the mirror deteriorating day by day and I just can’t bare looking at my husband’s eyes, sleeping by his side is so difficult, I am so ashamed and devastated that I look this way now.
I have a plan for ending my life, I am hanging on for my family but it is just so senseless to continue with this. What kind of life can someone possibly have when you deteriorate day by day and your face gets worse with time?
Maybe I could live in some way if I divorce my husband so I don’t have to worry about him looking at me. I could try and hide from the world like the monster I am.
| 79 |
A little about my life and seeking for advice on making it better
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Hi. I am 30yo. I am seeking other people's opinions on my case that would help me know myself better and get the proper treatment. Please skip to #3 if you don't want to read about my life.
To give you a better idea about myself- my childhood was pretty stressful, and my parents were fighting a lot with alcohol involved. They both ran businesses and made serious money but did not spend too much time with me when I was a kid, I was with babysitters or other family members most of the time, staying late at school waiting for someone to pick me up. I had anxiety attacks in preschool and cried every time, so I stopped going there. In early school, my anxiety got even worse with panic attacks, nervous twitching, etc. It all got much better when I was 11-12 yo. I made lifetime friendships, which last until today. I had my own life, and my parents did not worry too much about me, although they thought that everything is perfect. Then they got divorced, which brought lots of stress, new people in our house etc. Later on, my parents fell into a huge scam, which made them lose all savings, businesses, and then our house. This time was very stressful, but we somehow managed it, which wasn't easy. It has gotten worse and worse over time with the repo's knocking to our door daily. After finishing college, my mom, with her new husband, migrated to the US. So did my girlfriend.
Now, moving to my life as an adult, when they all moved to the US, I was the only one living in my foreign country. However, I really enjoyed that time, I had business perspectives and extreme support from childhood friends. In the meantime, I've noticed that my girlfriend is cheating on me, and my mind went somewhere else, I got maniacal thoughts and first signs of depression. All of this resulted in myself leaving everything behind and moving to the US. The first few years were terrible, I overstayed my visa to save my relationship, couldn't work or drive legally, and couldn't go back to my home country since it would be a one way trip. I really felt like in prison for a few years. Every day was very depressive. My childhood anxiety came back along with big social anxiety. I finally got a better job, house, marriage, and citizenship, and depression was coming on and off, but anxiety stayed there. I did not respond or call any of my friends for a few years.
Now, my current life. I lost interest in my marriage, my mood is usually down, I am grumpy and have no energy, and our sex life is none. Last year, I decided to get a treatment and talked to a psychiatrist. He diagnosed me with major depression, general anxiety, and social phobia. I was prescribed 10mg Lexapro. It helped with depression and mood swings, I dont think I've had a single depressive state while taking it. However, it made me emotionally dull, I lost all motivation and thinking about the future, i couldnt truly laugh and didn't care about talking to anyone. It also did not work at all for my social anxiety, it actually made it even worse. I stopped taking it in November when I visited my home country (for the first time after 10 years) for 2 months. The time I've spent there was great, I had no anxiety, depression or phobias at all, I got motivated and outgoing. When I returned to my home in US it all came back. Today I am depressed most of the time, don't want to talk to anyone, isolating myself from family anf friends, I am getting panic attacks when talking to someone at work over the phone (thankfully I'm working from home), I am irritated easily and small things can get me nervous or depressed. I also have extreme fatigue during the day and am feeling sleepy, I sleep 8-9h and have a hard time waking up. I am working out and eating healthy. I also had bloodwork is good, so it must be due to a mental issue.
TLDR:
I had anxiety as a child with lots of stress involved, then it got better until I reached adulthood. A lot of changes and failures caused depression, anxiety and social phobia. I've tried Lexapro which cured my depression but it made me emotionally dull, even more fatigued, reckless, unmotivated, and unsocial. It also escalated my social anxiety, so I stopped taking it after 7 months. I feel tired every day despite sleeping 8h and having a healthy lifestyle, also having a very hard time waking up. I do not have any suicidal thought at all butI have a feeling that my enjoyment of life is over and now it's just existence. My doctor prescribed Trazadone, but I don't really have issues falling asleep, all it takes for me is reading a book for an hour or so. I'm sure what I should do. SSRI's make me even more tired and have an emotional lack. I am not sure if that's a serotonin, dopamine, or norepinephrine issue. I would appreciate it if someone could share their opinion and recommend a medication, supplement, or anything else that would make my life better.
Just to add, I barely ever drink alcohol, no more then once every 2-3 months. But when I drink, I open myself up, I can actually talk to people and have fun, it makes me an extrovert, I dont overdo it only because Im a gym person.
Thank you!
| 4 |
Am I a fake
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Are all my emotions fake? I don’t think I have any sincere feelings. Sometimes I cry but I have the ability to stop instantly, the crying can feel real like I am sad and it feels like I need to cry but even still it feels very fake like an act. The exact same goes with laughing and any other feelings, including pain,I rolled over my ankle a while ago and it still hurts but I can’t tell if I’m being dramatic, if it’s all in my head like I’m thinking about it so much that I feel it. Maybe trying to manipulate other people and myself to validate me seeking attention.
| 2 |
To my coffee drinkers…
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Anxious, depressed, and struggling to stay awake. What do you do when you know coffee will make you more anxious but you’re kinda desperate for some life?
| 6 |
When u realize no one blood related really cares about u and only they care for your son and your daughter..
|
It makes me upset cause I did a lot for these people.. and more plus everything I’ve done for them wasn’t even worth all the stuff I was left with like bad credit and etc.. like I’ve always felt alone in every situation I’ve had with past ex’s and shit.. every time I see there true colors after an situation is done. I don’t agree with half the situations I’ve been in but at the same time there’s two sides to every story and they know how they treated me. There mostly the reason why I left.. no one cared that I was leaving but like two people.. seeing that hurt worst.. Even the person i genuinely cared for didn’t even care that I left.. This is why I don’t trust words anymore because it doesn’t mean a thing without actions.. because my ex I left behind he said a lot of things but he proved to me. That I meant nothing at the end.. somethings you do and say to other people do hurt.. and if you can’t see what your doing is effecting someone your the issue.. I know I’ve made so much mistakes and seeing that it was an cycle I needed to break so I just stopped.. for myself no matter how bad I hate feeling alone and not having genuine people in my life it sucks.. I’ve gone threw a lot alone. But one thing I do know if something we’re to happen to me. I don’t want them at my funeral crying cause they didn’t give a fuck while I was around anyway..
| 6 |
Looking For A Job
|
Hello,
What do you do when you don't want a job because you know JOB, but you want a job because you want spending money? I have anxiety and the only jobs I really qualify for are customer service jobs, those are the only jobs that pop up on my Indeed and I don't know where else to look for jobs because I'm afraid to have a customer service job again because I've been screamed at many times in the past and have been sent home for crying when a customer screams at me many times.
What am I supposed to do? What kind of jobs should I look for? And then this whole search for a job is stressful and shooting at my self-esteem. Most jobs don't get back to me and jobs that do will smile in my face at interviews act as if they love me and then ghost me. I don't know what to do.
I thought about doing gigs or odd jobs online, but I have no skills for those things I believe and I also think they will take some time before I generate a nice income from those.
​
Any suggestions?
| 2 |
Support for my girlfriend
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We have had a relation for 4 years and one year living together. That has been an excelent girl but she have anxiety and depresión. Since we are living together, I am more aware about their symptoms and episodes. I would like to how can help and support her daily. My support might help her to take the decision and get medical attention by herself. I love her but sometimes that is not enough but I don't want to bring her pressure.
| 2 |
I’m struggling (illness, adhd and depression)
|
I’m struggling in every area of my life
I don’t find joy in anything that I do. I feel trapped in my mind and my body
I physically feel so sick and fatigued every day and my health practitioners aren’t listening to the symptoms I’m having and just putting it down to my depression and endometriosis
Something is wrong with my body and no one is listening. I’m so tired and dizzy all the time and I don’t feel real.
I used to love my job and now I get no joy out of it. I feel big waves of doom and nothingness
I’ve been in therapy (and still am) and got my anxiety and depression in a really good place, but now nothing that was helping is working any more. Something is wrong and I feel like nothing is going to fix it
I guess I just needed to vent because I’m not sure what advice or help that strangers can provide. Thank your for listening
| 21 |
Which med was the most brutal to quit?
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Please do share your experiences.
| 2 |
It would be so easy to solve everything
|
Get a job and move out. It's that simple. But I'm such a piece of shit that I can't even manage that
| 2 |
Dealing with Anxiety and Intrusive Thoughts
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Today, I'm a really difficult day dealing with anxiety and suicidal thoughts. I felt overwhelmed and hopeless, and I didn't know how to cope. Don't get me wrong please, I do not plan on doing anything stupid because I have much to live for, I think I just wanted to share my feelings with someone, because I feel the people around wouldn't understand me.
Now, I did not feel anxious or anything like that, but I was at the gym, doing some cardio and I started to have really negative feelings. I went out of the gym and I continued to have them. The last time this happened to me, was 4 years ago when my anxiety was at it's peak. Thoughts of being worthless, depression and suicidal and I hate myself for having them.
I guess what I wanted to share my feelings and I wanted to ask to those who suffer from anxiety, if once in a while this is something you also feel, and how do you cope with them. Thank you for reading this.
| 3 |
Numbness
|
I went from being in so much pain and sadness and now feel nothing. I tried to put my boundaries down I tried to stick to it. I tried to put myself first. I was broken down by my SO. It was like a switch flipped. I have no more fight in me. I have no passion. I have nothing. Im sitting in class rn just going through the motions. Im great at just doing what I have to. What’s expected of me. Im just numb. I was intimate last night with my SO and it was physically great but emotionally I was just numb. Im just here. It’s very weird. I’ve never felt like this before. I don’t know if I hate it or love it. I can’t imagine being in pain would be better. Idk. Again just here. Someone asked me how I was doing and previously I would cry but instead I smiled and said alright. I don’t feel alright but how do you say you feel nothing?? Do any of you feel like this?? Is it forever?? Did my brain break??
| 1 |
Took all my vitamins everyday so far for a week straight most consistent I’ve ever been
| null | 39 |
What should I do??
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Did any of you feel like doing nothing just letting your anxiety and depression control over you?? But you know how to control those illness and you have your therapist yet you don't want to share anything to anyone how you feel because you thought you will give burden to them.
| 2 |
I feel like I'm asking for too much
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Because of being raised by a covert narc (father) and a grandiose narc (mother) 2 of my sisters also became narcissistic. My oldest sister (45) is a religious narc.
I also have a 3rd sister (32) that idk what type of narc she is but she always makes me feel bad about myself when I try to tell her about my experience I had with my parents or with other horrible ppl.
For instance, tonight I was having dinner with my 2nd older sister (43), my 3rd older sister (32) n myself.
My 2nd sister (43) was explaining to the both of us how my Nfather (65) is treating my sister bad because my Nmother (63).
(My Nmother showed a picture of herself with a male choir singer at a event to my Nfather, and now my Nfather is upset, and he's taking his frustration out on my 2nd sister (43)
My 2nd sister has clinical depression n suffers from BPD which cause her to be unable to work n suffer from major social anxiety. She works with my NFather is his business.
So my NFather is taking out his anger on my sister by locking 🔒 her out of his business so she can't help him or work in the place. Bear in mind he doesn't pay her at all.
Anyways, as my sister was telling us about how my Nfather was behaving over the weekend (he didn't attend Palm Sunday mass with my sister (43) n Nmother, he didn't have Sunday dinner with them either, and he didn't do some other thing as well) My sister was explaining how he made her feel sad n then all of a sudden my 3rd sister (32) became dismissive towards my other sister.
Saying things like "You ask for that because you aren't working." "You need to get out this house n find somewhere else to be." She started telling us about how she would just go out and walk around the city all day cause she couldn't stand being at home. She even stated that she's tired of hearing my 2nd sister talk about all the stuff my parents do to her. She expressed how she's thankfull for the way our parents treated us because without the neglect and abuse she wouldn't have push herself to farther ther education, and that our mother miss treatment is helping her in her current job because she's using thoes same abusive tactics on her male employees to get them to work. She said that she started doing thing our parents did to us when we were young to her employees, such as cutting out the water at work, telling the employees about how lazy they are being, or that they are laying around as if they are pregnant.
After a while the conversation ended about my parents.
I then stated that I wanted to share n experience I had encounter over the weekend but I didn't want my sisters to be angry or upset with me for the way I acted. (Spoiler they did made me feel like I was in the wrong)
This weekend I went to a different church. (I stop attending my catholic church n I'm not to fond about religion in general rn)
I was invited to see a church performance which ment that I would be sitting through the mass ceremony. I was ok with that, I've been to the church a couple times. The ppl r nice n it was a friend that invited me (She doesn't really know about how I have stepped away from religion n I don't really feel comfortable telling her because I know she's super religious)
Anyways, when the massed ended I was sitting at the back of the church waiting for her. I ended up losing sight of her in the crowd of ppl so I got up n tried looking for her. However, this man who I saw got up and did a testimony preaching in front of the church started talking to me. This was the 1st time since going to that church that I have seen man. (Bear in mind the last time I attend this church was maybe Christmas)
Back to the event; I was passing in front of this man, my head looking away from him n my mind focus on trying to see were my friend went. I heard him started talking but I didn't turn around until he tapped me on the shoulder.
He was saying something but I wasn't paying attention and I couldn't hear him well because of the crowd. I eventually starter hearing what he was saying, which was that he knew me as a child. Then he just hugged me unexpectedly. I didn't prepared or expected him to hug me at all. I froze n eventually kind of pushed him away from me and then told him sorry I wasn't expecting a hug then he gave me a high five because of how my had was againt my should in front of my body. I ended the conversation with pleasantries and told him his preaching was good and then I said good bye.
I was explaining how I felt uncomfortable with the way the man hugged me and that I didn't expect him to hug me in the first place to my sisters. My 3rd older sister (32) starter telling me that I was in the wrong and that I should change my behavior when attending someone else's church. I should have expected that from a non catholic church. She said that most non catholic church are very friendly, and that if I don't want other people hugging me or touching I shouldn't go to places were people are friendly. She told me that I'm anti social and snubby for not wanting the man to hug me.
I tired explaining to her that I didn't know the man. It was the first time I have ever seen the man. I also wasn't prepared or expected him to hug me, and this wasn't a regular hug. It was a kinda aggressive kinda sexulized hug. I told my sister that I found out he was the pastor after I told my friend about the interaction and then she informed me that he was the new pastor for her church.
My sisters said that I'm over reacting, and that my anti social behavior is a set back for my life, and that if I don't want people to hug me then I need to tell everyone before I go somewhere. Or to just stop interacting with people that like hugs and that are friendly.
I tried to explain that I'm friendly to people I know, and that I'm okay with giving hugs on 1st interaction sometimes; just this time I wasn't mentally there for the conversation and I didn't expected it at all.
My sisters told me that it's unfair for me to go into someone else's church and tell them how to behave and that pastors and religious preachers are expected to be overly friendly so I should be okay with him hugging me.
My sisters told me I'm over reacting and that I can't go around and not expect people to hug me or touch me or be overly cautious of men.
I told them I don't know the man at all. All I know was that he went up and read some words from the Bible. My sisters then told me that i should have known he was friendly and assume he was good from that one moment. They both told me that I can't go around being anxious about all men and that I should learn to read people from the moment I meet them even if it's not directly meeting them.
They then ask if I would have been okay if I had gotten a hug from a specific actor if I would have been okay with that. I told them yes; then they said, but you don't know that actor personally, so I should treat that actor hug the same way I am treating this man hug.
I feel like I'm to have boundaries, especially when it comes to hugs and physical touch. But my sisters are saying that I need to change my way because people are always going to hug and touch me when I don't expect it, and I should be okay with that.
| 2 |
im overwhelmed
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currently at work typing this as I feel so emotional and my mind is racing. My mind won’t stop with the negative stuff happening in my life, im worried, im stressed, I get so anxious and depressed I feel sick to my stomach some days. Im in a new relationship and im lucky that my gf also deals with mental health stuff but im so scared to fuck this up. I have been on lexapro for 6 years and I don’t think it’s working anymore! I have felt overwhelmed like this for like 6 months and idk what to do anymore. Some days are easier than others but lately I’ve felt mentally unstable, lack of motivation and just sad always. I wanna try a new medication but im scared it will make me worse. I just wanna crawl into a ball and not leave my house
| 6 |
Idk anymore
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I’m so lost on what to do at this point, I struggle everyday with overwhelming anxiety. I’ve tried therapy, medication, psychology, checking myself into a mental hospital, it feels like I’ve tried everything and nothing seems to work… Anything sets it off anymore, doctors appointment? Anxious. Work? Anxious. Going out for dinner? Anxious. Everything makes me anxious and I overthink everything. It’s always “what if” or “should I have” I always think something bad is going to happen. It doesn’t help that I’ll be completely fine one second and then an anxious mess the next.
Any advice on what’s happening/how to help it.
Sorry this post is a mess, it’s a solid representation of my brain 90% of the time.
| 1 |
I just don't care anymore
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I don't care about anything anymore. About myself or people around me. I just don't care. Can't deal with this anymore
| 3 |
Who else gets anxious before bed?
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I don't know why, even if I had a relatively good day, like today, I get anxiety before bed. Every night for years now; I've just gotten used to it. I have medicine for insomnia now, so that at least helps me sleep better. I sleep just fine during the day, I feel safe and cozy. I love naps, but just wish I could sleep that peacefully with no worries at night. I don't want to be scared of the night or sleeping. I don't want to think about tomorrow or anything. I just want to be at peace in the moment, not a care in the world like when I was a kid.
| 34 |
Looking for advice...
|
...or at the very least; a shoulder to cry on.
My younger siblings and mother constantly talked about my older sister behind her back about how she acts like a whore, has fallen away from our church and doesn't want to communicate with us anymore.
They did that before we moved from California to Utah. In California, I was cynical about life and did not want to move to Utah. My mother said "if you look for the bad you'll find it everywhere."
So, I sucked it up and helped move us to Utah. Then I got a really good job in security and had the privilege of hearing my mother and younger siblings get contentious about how terrible my older sister is.
Then (even though we were in Utah to help my older sister) they still spoke ill of her. I tried to be loving and neutral but my mother accused me of being brainwashed by the Utah culture.
But my mom said if I look for the bad I'll find it.
So what was wrong with my choice to try to be more positive now?
Fast forward to now, we moved to Arizona (allegedly to be closer to my grandfather but mostly because mom hated Utah, even though moving was her idea in the beginning. Me and dad just packed and drove everything).
So now we're here in Arizona. I was laid of from my security job a month before the move so that wasn't an issue. And I was able to secure a part-time job as a custodian on swing shifts. So most days I sleep during the afternoon and go to work from 6 PM to 230 AM. It's an hour drive for me so I get home say 0330/0400 AM.
So when I wake up around 12/1 PM I get up, eat and spend time by myself reading or watching TV on my computer.
I've been behaving neutrally here in AZ since cynicism wasn't good in CA and then positivity wasn't good in UT. And all I hear are my siblings and mother now talking about me behind my back whenever I'm in the shower or upstairs trying to sleep (they are loud and the stairs echo so you can hear everything).?"
One day I decided to just chime in and said "ooh, are we talking about me?" My mom just stopped talking and pretended that I didn't even exist while my siblings suddenly found themselves needed elsewhere.
Fast forward to today. I extracted two floors of our 64000 square foot building and am tired and worn out. I saw that my bathroom door was ajar when I got home and shut it. Because I had the look of someone not in the mood to talk (because I'm worn out) I was yelled at for being moody and negative.
She said: "why would a girl want to see you when you act like this?"
I told my mom "at least it's not anger management or anything like that."
Then I asked my mother what she wanted me to do and she said "be more positive."
When I asked her "and where would I find motivation for that?" She rolled her eyes and stopped talking.
Now, it's ten minutes before dad comes home and everybody is pretending that nothing happened at 4 this afternoon.
This cycle goes on every week and I can't address it without being told I'm not supportive, I don't understand, I don't care or any form of phrase that sounds the same.
It brings me to the verge of tears and sometimes it makes me want to end it all since it seems like I'd be better off permanently gone. Even though they'd find some way to make it sound like I'm feeling sorry for myself and being a baby.
My dad understands he is caught in the middle too. I can't vent at work since I don't want home life to affect my professional life either.
I hate it and I don't know what to do. I don't make enough part-time to move out (but I'm saving as I earn to hopefully do that).
But I see my siblings and mother then say if I am distant (or just hang out with dad) that I'm being mean, cruel and that I don't give a damn and am behaving just like my older sister.
Now, even if you can't provide any advice per-say, I'd appreciate it if you just say that you managed to read this whole bit.
Thank you.
| 1 |
Feel like nothing matters
|
I have no control over anything not even my brain why even worry about anything
Else
| 3 |
I just did a CBT worksheet...SIGH
|
I mean...I felt like I was back in 11th grade psychology!
It did say that both my depression and anxiety were in the "very high" range (big surprise, lol)
Besides that though, I had MAJOR trouble writing down examples of emotional / upsetting / angry experiences and the thoughts and then resultant feelings that come from them, and THEN trying to challenge those cognitively distorted thoughts.
Firstly, because I can't really recall an emotional, upsetting or angering experience. I don't have a lot of interactions in general, and having anhedonia kind of removes most of the care factor.
Secondly, the few vaguely annoying experiences I've had recently, my thoughts in response were legitimately not distorted. They were rational and logical. The FEELINGS associated with them were also rational in relation to the actual experiences.
Thirdly, when other people use various cognitive distortions (mainly overgeneralising, catastrophising, personalising and projecting / assuming), I'm the one to apply logic to them to show them their thoughts are not rational. So I know how to recognise it and apply it.
The quiz thing even said I have very few "warped thoughts" and cognitive distortions. Which is true.
My anxiety is not situational. It's subconscious and it's a constant feeling of dread and impending doom, from early trauma and fear at 4 years old that continued for over a decade, causing CPTSD. I developed OCD and AvPD around age 7. BPD around age 15-16. And now anhedonic depression.
Does CBT work for people like me, who are a bit older (44), self aware, who are rational and logical in their thoughts, have pretty high self confidence, do not take ownership for others' issues, and basically don't have many cognitive distortions BUT just always FEEL horribly scared and also bored and tired from the anhedonia, and have various comorbid disorders?
I have tried CBT before, in 2018 in therapy, and did not find it helpful then either, for the same reasons as now.
| 1 |
Single Parenting
|
I'm a single father based in Missouri, I'm an Engineer trying my best to give my daughter the best things in life ,but there is still an emptiness in my daughter's life that I can't fill , I'm depressed and don't know want else to do . Do I really need a lady in my life ???? A companion???
| 1 |
What's the worst thing depression has taken from you?
|
There are a whole bunch of things I could rant about but what has to take the cake is the enjoyment of music. I used to be such a music junky, if that's even a thing. I'd try different genres, make playlists for people and spent all my time discovering cool songs. But now, I kid you not I just can't do all that anymore. I barely listen to music, I've stopped going out of my way to find cool songs or artists cos I feel genuinely bothered almost irritated listening to songs most of the time. Since my mental really started to fall apart, I'm sick of my own music/liked songs and playlists, cos I've cried so much to them it brings back shit memories, and won't discover new music cos it actually feels like a dull activity. Never in my life did I think this would happen to me. That I'd be too sad to even enjoy music, for the longest time I was glad I at least had that, I should’ve savoured it, cos now I don't know how to get it back.
Thank you so much to everyone who's replied. Reading these has both broken my heart and warmed it cos I'm glad we have this community where we can let this off our chest. I wish love and hope to everyone who comes by this post and resonates with it or the comments under it <3
| 57 |
Life
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What is life for you? Life for me is a glass with water spilled on it. The hotter the water, the worse the life, the colder the better
My life is a hot cup waiting to boil. I'm tired of failures and bad people ruining my life and their numbers starting to increase.I also have diseases, diseases that he has not been able to get rid of for years. One disease ends and another disease begins, and this disease is worse than the previous one. I don't think I will live long anyway. I don't want a human to kill me or die of disease, instead an animal or I can kill myself. Humans are truly evil creatures, and there is no other creature that treats each other so badly. If people hadn't been so mean to each other, I probably wouldn't have written this and I wouldn't have been in such a bad mood.
| 1 |
I feel numb and with absolutely no emotions
|
I start taking antidepresants for about 3 months now and don't know if it has something to do but i really can't feel, i don't even feel worried and i used to be very anxious and not feeling worried makes me like not do things i really have to do like college assignments or really important stuff, but i just don't care,
any advice.
| 1 |
Am I the problem?
|
I feel like I should never go out in public again. I feel like I should just be banished from life forever. The reason why is because I’m a straight, autistic, white male who doesn’t like kids. That’s saying a lot for age 35.
I feel like I myself am the problem because of that. The first thing is because I’m practically paranoid about being shamed for that. All just for being a straight, autistic, white male. Nobody would even want to understand that.
Same goes for not liking kids. Kids running around, screaming and crying and getting into stuff and mine and others’ gives me anxiety. Often in public I bring my headphones to listen to so I can try to drown it all out. Especially for the parents who let their kids misbehave and do nothing about it.
I feel like I would be shamed, laughed at, or beaten up for those things. It makes me feel like I deserve to be an outcast forever. Am I the problem? Do I deserve to be an outcast? Should I never go out in public again? Even with friends or family?
| 1 |
My best friend from my childhood broke up with me for real this time. I’ve never been much sadder 😥😓😢😢😩😩
|
I thought she’d always be there but she was gone in a minute. I’m crying so much right now. I just got off the phone with her a while ago and she just doesn’t wanna be friends anymore. I have no clue what I’m gonna tell my mother, she’ll have a heart attack once she finds out. My friend doesn’t even wanna have another call with me, she just doesn’t want anything else to do with me. I never wanted us to end, I know nothing lasts forever but I thought we could change that. Words can’t describe how sad I am right now.
| 2 |
I feel so alone
|
Ive posted this to a few forums but Idk what to do. Not had much good advice or anything to be honest and it makes me feel sick to my stomach because im tired of this life and feeling this way
Ok so this might seem like a troll post but its not. Its kinda long too. Im posting this to a few forums cuz i need to vent and my mental health is suffering. Forgive me if this isnt allowed here just remove it. I just need to feel someone cares or listens even if you dont.
Im 39 m london. My whole life ive wanted a muscular girlfriend. In fact ive never had a relationship . Ive only ever been attracted to muscular women but never met any in person. Zero. I cant help it, normal women just dont do it for me. I hate it and hate feeling shallow but i cant help it. I dont think id be happy with someone regular. Obviously i know muscle doesnt last forever so personality matters , i just would have liked to meet a woman whos muscular and experience it . Its not all that matters especially long term but i cant give up on that. But normal women just dont attract me. Even if i dated one i wouldnt be interested in them sexually it would basically be just companionship. There would be nothing else to it so why not just be friends? I cant help what I find attractive, i wish i could
Another problem is my whole life ive suffered crippling depression. I also stopped caring about life and got really fat. So naturally i feel its unfair to want a muscular gf when ic ant get fit myself. Yet i also find it hard to beat my depression feeling alone. I always hoped id find someone who could help me get fit and develop a relationship with but it never happened.
Ive been in so ,many fights online over the years verbally because i tried reaching out to fit women and always got ignored. That always triggered me because ive always felt invisible. I also have a mental,learning disability so im not exactly what youd call a catch. Im torn between knowing most muscular women wouldnt want me and hoping for someone who will. But it lead to so many arguments i regret. Ive been resentful for a long time of dudes who get muscular women. Really bitter. Its made me angry. I said a lot of vile shit to people and hurt people i regret because i felt rejected and ignored. I have tried my best to beat this with therapy but i still do it occasionally and i hate it. It makes me feel like im back at square one when i fight online with someone . I know its illogical and i know no one owes me a response,i know im in the wrong to insult. But the pain and being alone blots out my logic until later when im remorseful as hell.
I decided two years ago to try. To not give up on life which is where i was for most of my life. But its so so hard. I want to be decent and worthy of these women. But i also know even if i get fit i dont even know any muscular women so it makes it feel even more pointless when im feeling down. Because i do want to be fit but im not a fan of exercise and really am trying to get fit not just for health but because i find it unfair i want a fit woman when im not fit myself. But its so so hard to stay positive.
I am trying to be a decent less bitter angry person. It hurts to see guys who are living a life with a woman who seems great with every quality i love. I know im not entitled to love and try to remember that. I try to remember when ive been mean and rude and how i dont wanna be that way.
One woman specifically i truly began to care for and it ended in a bad argument, she later forgave me but stopped talking. Id do anything for that friendship back but i caused its loss and thats on me
Ive made some progress. Since jan ive gone from 131kg to 124 just under. But i dont feel much better and feel so far to go. And in addition i found i had a pituitary brain tumour so i need surgery at some point as well as find ing out its what cause me low test all my life. I feel so much is against me. I even feel sometimes if i die during surgery id feel better
I know this has been kinda a self pity rant i just needed to tell someone because i dont have anyone to talk to. Idk if anyone cares i just feel rock bottom. Im not giving up yet , i will keep trying to be better. Its just so hard and right now ive never felt more alone
I feel so so fucking hopeless and down it hurts in my chest
| 2 |
Meds
|
Anyone care to share their meds and dosages?
| 1 |
Vitamin B12 and vitamin D3
|
Has any one used these and how much to help anxiwty and depression??
| 4 |
Changing from fluoxetine to setraline
|
So my doc has recommended me to change my medication as I’ve been on fluoxetine for a long time.
She told me it’s gonna be rough. I work in retail and was wondering if I should take some time off work whilst I change over.
Has anyone else had any complications or can give me advice on what’s best to do.
What is everyone else’s experience changing medications.
Any advice would be brilliant.
| 2 |
My self esteem is non existent
|
I was talking to a mental health professional about some stuff and told them about how I hit my own head with my fists or objects when I fail.
The convo went something like:
"So why do you hit yourself?"
"I deserve to be punished for failing"
"Well, you wouldn't think anyone else should do the same? Hit themselves over trivial mistakes?"
"No, of course not."
"Then why should you?"
"Because I'm a worse person than everyone else."
that last line kinda shocked me coming out of my own mouth. I feel kinda strange now.
| 16 |
Trouble sleeping. Can’t shut my brain off.
|
I have tried melatonin and currently taking Ashwagandha, and other supplements. Any suggestions on what I can take before bed to calm my brain and thoughts? I’m constantly laying in bed just thinking and thinking of every aspect of my life, good and bad.
| 3 |
Are You an Introvert with Anxiety?
|
Anxiety. That emotion warning us something threatening is just about to happen. Life-saving when we are genuinely threatened, damaging when we become constantly anxious: anxiety is tiring – it is meant to be. We are only meant to be anxious for very short periods. When prolonged, it isn’t just tiring – it is exhausting. Sound familiar?
Introverts. Those of us who prefer calm situations and environments. We prefer to re-charge on our own. We often enjoy losing ourselves in our own thoughts. We tend to have small, close-knit, social lives. That doesn’t mean we’re anti-social!
Not all introverts experience anxiety, and you don’t have to be an introvert to struggle with it. Many introverts deal with anxiety, though, so this is quite common.
Here are the key signs you’re an introvert with anxiety:
· You’re more prepared than most others because you’ve already thought through the worst-case scenarios.
· You have a tendency to over-think things and pay too much attention to your negative self-talk.
· You feel you always have to be doing something – being busy (which is often different from being effective) may be a means of trying to cope with the anxiety.
· You tend to prefer routines to novel situations. While this can be fine for periods, boredom and unexpected issues arising can easily throw you in to a spin.
· You’re often nervous without showing it – many become very effective at masking their emotions as a defence mechanism.
· You are more likely to perceive situations as being more dangerous than they really are - anxiety primes us for the fight, flight, freeze response making us more likely to over-react to a low-risk situation.
· You have tendencies towards perfectionism. This is often allied to beliefs such as ‘I need to please everyone’, ‘I need everyone to like me to be a worthy person’.
· Nervousness can throw your chatter in to over-drive: while you normally only speak when you have something significant to say (and you’re normally sure of your facts before speaking), nerves can have you chattering away in an attempt to over-compensate.
· You often have trouble sleeping – either getting to sleep a-tall, waking through the night or waking way too early
Being an introvert with anxiety can be hard. Thankfully there is help at hand. Anxiety in its many guises is one of the most common issues Solution Focused Hypnotherapy therapists help people with.
*Ask yourself: What have I learned from this article that I will adopt today as my own? What is the one thing that has grabbed me, and what will I do about it NOW?*
I hope you got something out of this short piece: I have posted more quick reads on my own little corner of the Redditsphere as per my profile.
| 2 |
Why Is Finding Therapy So Complicated?
|
I have been struggling with depression since I was 14 years old, I’ve seen therapists and tried medications but over the years I’ve tried the self medicating method. I’ve been searching for therapy online for months but the one thing that really bothers me is that one question that’s always asked; “are you suicidal, or have you had thoughts about harming yourself?”. I wanna be honest so I say yes. Next question, “how often do you think about it?”. Again, I’m honest because I want help, so I select daily if it’s applicable, if not I select the one that’s closest to thinking about it daily. So after that, I am most of the time directed to the suicide hotline… if I’m not then I’m asked, “have you made specific plans or is it a general thought?”, so yeah I have made plans and specifics for how I wanna do it but I don’t plan on going through with it so I can select that I’ve made plans and again im directed out immediately… so it’s a lose lose situation for me. Just let me answer my questions and help me… it’s been putting me off of finding help and im really struggling. Not sure what advice I can be given other than to grow up and stop whining but it’s just hard to get help when your honest and constantly directed into another direction.
| 11 |
coming off trintillex side effects!
|
Slowly tapering off trintillex it's my first week and I'm now experiencing decreased appetite, diarrhea and so much gas. Is this normal when coming of antidepressants?
| 1 |
We are 68 therapists, psychologists, and mental health experts gathering for the biggest ever bipolar AMA! In honor of World Bipolar Day, ask us anything!
|
Throughout the next few days, we're hosting a huge AMA for World Bipolar Day! 68 international bipolar experts from 12 countries are here on Reddit to answer your questions - join us here:
[https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/126rx2j/were\_68\_bipolar\_disorder\_experts\_scientists/](https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/126rx2j/were_68_bipolar_disorder_experts_scientists/)
| 4 |
Is this anxiety attacks? Help
|
female(21) I have depression and anxiety and I’ve been really anxious about a situation with a guy and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. It’s been really bad for maybe a month now, but the last 2 weeks have been a lot worse. More noticeably in the past few days I’ve been anxious 24/7 and my anxiety goes in waves where i’m just generally anxious then i start to think about the guy i’m upset about and my thoughts spiral and my heart beats rlly fast and my breathing quickens and i start to cry maybe half the time and there’s a heavy sinking feeling in my chest. It’s the worst in the mornings and before bed, but it’s still just bad all day. i also smoke weed everyday and normally it calms me down and grounds my thoughts but it’s not working for this. I don’t really know what this is, what should i to stop this?
| 0 |
Magnessium for anxiety mood
|
Anyone take magnessium for mood and anxiety? Does it help
| 3 |
Anyone trying to do better but then just feel like there heart aches all the time, so depressed just wanna feel normal again and happy, does it get better??
| null | 11 |
Propranolol
|
Any take propranolol to help with anxiety and mood
| 2 |
Something positive
|
I don't sleep well most nights and anxiety really does not help. So something I've started doing is going downstairs and sketching my cat in a little notebook I have. I'm not a very good artist, but my cat makes me very happy so I enjoy trying to draw her. The only thing is that she tosses and turns! I find this alternative is better than laying in bed staring at social media.
| 2 |
How much more can I take?
|
Honestly. I know there’s light at the end of the tunnel and things get better but I don’t see that shit rn. I just wanna crawl under a rock and never come out. I don’t even have hobbies anymore. I don’t even recognize myself anymore. I don’t even love myself enough to be able to feed myself anymore. I know I shouldn’t give us. I know I shouldn’t and I don’t want to. But fuck when will I be able to rest. I’m so tired. My entire life I’ve l been in survival mode. When can I stop surviving and start thriving?
| 4 |
Propranolol feeling sad
|
5mg of propranolol make you more depressed 2 days later.
| 1 |
I can’t shower
|
Vulnerable post
I really struggle to shower. I have depression and anxiety and I just hate doing it. It exhausts me. I get this anxious rage when I feel dirty r unshaven though
Any tips,
| 11 |
Inpatient treatment
|
Finally decided it’s time, been battling addiction for 5 years and anxiety for longer and I haven’t made any progress. I’ve actually gone backwards and it’s affected my family, especially my parents. Some days I don’t even know myself anymore. I’ve been sober for a month or so now and I still feel like crap with meds. Experimented with all kinds of meds and still nothing. Anxiety and depression rule everyday of my life and I’m ready for a change. What can I expect from a facility?
| 6 |
I’m yelling “fire!” And nobody is doing anything.
|
I had a dream when I was a kid that my closet was on fire, but when I ran into the hallway to scream “FIRE!” and warn my family, I don’t have a voice. It’s frustrating and the panic gets worse and worse because time is running out to get everyone to safety.
This feeling is with me everyday of my life. Even if there is no fire in my closet, even if there is no danger, and if there is any real danger someday, I dread people not listening to me or feeling the same urgency as I do. Sometimes I want to smack my head against a wall, I feel so helpless.
And everyone — EVERYONE — loves to tell me “relax,” “don’t worry about things you cant control,” etc… As if that is a new perspective that I’ve never heard before. I want to turn it off like a faucet, my life would be so much easier without the weight of my imaginary world on fire.
| 7 |
any help
|
i have been suffering for 95 days now...at first i had a full blown panic attack that had lots of unpleasant physical symptoms, then i sought therapy, i went on cipralex and **Quetiapine** for a while, cipralex (20mg) and quetiapine (50mg) but i suddenly stopped them, i didnt notice any ''withdrawal symptoms'' after i directly stopped them but a couple weeks later i started getting weird symptoms like nausea, dizziness, headaches, fast heart beats,..etc nowadays im experiencing more symptoms and im scared : 1- i tend to forget 2-i feel like my speech is slurred even tho it comes out okay 3- feel like my face is heavy 4- bad derealization 5-weird feeling in my tongue
| 2 |
I've wasted 2 years of my life
|
I've done nothing in the last 2 years of my life since finishing my baccalaureate. I'm 20 now. I've applied to Uni twice and haven't gotten in (due to not studying enough). now's the third year I'm applying. If I don't get in this year then, well, idk. I feel like my life is over before it's begun.
| 3 |
Has anyone taken lamictal and when they went up to 100mg anxiety was heightened but went back down to 50mg and it was better. Did you eventually go back up?
| null | 4 |
Health anxiety is ruining my life.
|
I have had severe anxiety for almost 15 years now. As I get older, I overanalyse how I feel physically and it is literally ruining my life. I’m not able to sleep. I refuse to take anything to help me sleep because anytime I take a pill, I get anxious because my brain immediately thinks my body is going to have a bad reaction (I’m literally not allergic to anything so like ….? Cmon brain). I just feel like I’m going crazy. At least 80% of my thoughts are about my health/if I’m going to die in my sleep/if I have a horrible disease/if I’m having a heart attack (it’s literally just my anxiety but my brain just doesn’t seem to understand that). Anyway this is me at 4 am not being able to sleep because I literally feel sick and think I’m going to die. Also, after worrying about all of this, I then start to worry about how me saying all this is just me manifesting these things for myself so yeah. It’s a never ending cycle. Just needed to let that out DAMN.
| 2 |
I thought I had DPRDR but my Psych says different
|
I've suffered from panic and anxiety attacks since I was 17. The last 3 weeks I've felt a lot of derealization, with intrusive thoughts and almost like my panic attacks started and never left. Psychiatrist said she can't do anything for me, stay on Xanax and put me on prestique. Has anyone had any good experience with that antidep medicine? I start a new job soon, I have to cancel all appointments and not even sure what to do anymore. I feel like I'm not here and she said it's anxiety, except it's never been THIS bad. Distractions won't work anything. I don't think eating is appetizing anymore, i stopped taking care of my teeth, don't brush, barely shower. I only go on because I have my 2yo. I'm glad I'm not suicidal.
| 2 |
Does anyone have severe anxiety from being a woman in a man's world?
|
So I know the optics of this are not going to look good...but here goes. Disclaimer first: I am not afraid of or do not dislike men. I love my father, my boyfriend and my many male friends (in different ways obv), and love many things about men in general.
I've been managing GAD, and in particular social anxiety, for a while now, coupled with depression for almost 10 years. The pandemic all but destroyed me socially and I'm working my way back up to where I used to be. However, my anxiety spikes when I'm at work, and it's getting to the point where I want to throw up or cry when these episodes take hold. It's not just affecting my wellbeing, it's affecting my work performance too.
I work in a site office on a construction site (residential). I am female (early 30s) and it's naturally a very male-driven environment. And these are honestly the men that time forgot. They are disparaging and dismissive of women, particularly about their wives, are constantly roaring and shouting, threatening each other and generally act aggressively and unprofessional. I am not averse to coarse language but this is too much.
I want to emphasise that no one has ever acted aggressively or inappropriately to me. No one's been anything but courteous to me, to be fair. I don't know why this triggers me so much. Even their loud, booming laughter sets off my fight or flight response. I feel trapped and vulnerable. I don't know if it's my irrational instincts, or it's part of a larger anti-woman rhetoric that pervades in a place like this. I am very aware that I am the minority.
Violence towards women is on the rise around the world, coupled with the resurgence of incel culture. It's a dangerous time to be a woman. We all have friends and family that have been abused by a partner, attacked on a night out, stalked or even murdered. Women are losing more and more of their freedom and autonomy to this kind of fear. And I wonder if this truth is where my instincts are coming from? Does anyone else feel like this?
Thank you for reading my rambing thoughts and allowing me to get this off my chest. I don't want to be afraid, it's not the type of person I am. And it's insulting to these men, who have never given me a reason to fear them personally. I guess I'm just looking to be seen here, and for confirmation that I'm not alone in these feelings.
| 6 |
ChatGPT as a therapist
|
Let me preface this by saying ChatGPT is not a replacement for a therapist, it cannot understand you like a real person can.
That being said, I've found it's a great place to vent to and ask for help. If you want to just complain about your day, or ask about strategies for coping with anxiety/depression, it's an amazing tool for that. It's like talking to a person and is really well individualized. If you're struggling to find the energy to leave the house, or don't have access to a therapist, it's a really useful resource.
Example: ask it about CBT strategies and give it follow up questions explaining them. Or even vent to your hearts content, and it'll recognize you're upset and respond with kind words. It can suggest things you never would have thought of, helping you find your own path out of a depression hole. I wish I had this months ago when I needed it.
| 7 |
I dont want to do this anymore
|
When does this end. Im sick of being fugitive of my own mind and a prisoner of my thoughts
| 8 |
I cant eat. TW About food I guess
|
I went to the dentist yesterday and they numbed my mouth and I wasn’t allowed to eat, and I had like a migraine. So I only ate breakfast. which was like a smoothie
Then today I started to feel like im getting sick, and I wasn’t hungry all day but could not for the life of me stand for more than ten seconds without having to sit down. I tried eating dinner but it tasted like sand and I couldn’t get it down, so i ate like two bites of a toastie.
Ive nauseous all day and i tried to eat ice cream to get some sugar in me which sorta worked but it also tasted off, but not as bad as actual food
What do I do, ive also been overly anxious and had panic attacks these last two days, but I dunno if its that or that im getting sick.
| 3 |
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