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weird early morning realization
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im in a state when i actually begin to realise and accept that maybe if other people have it doesn't mean i will. maybe this is literally it and my journey is nearing its end. as much as i don't want it to. No good things aare waiting for me on this side.
| 1 |
Relationship - too much attachment
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I’ve been dating this girl for a year and I feel like I’m overly attached. I’m doing things above and beyond for her without considering what I would like. I want to be in a state where I’m not hurt if things go south. Recs?
| 1 |
American McGee ad – dunno what to make of it.
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One of these popped up on my feed. Not for anything MH related, but I saw they have a "Mental Health" collection. And, they have a big statement on every page about how every plush design is ethically sourced [ *cheeky paraphrasing is my own* ]. And like, okay, I guess? The prices seem kinda high, but they actually look pretty sizeable, but at the top of their MH section is "Anxiety Rabbit", and I immediately turned to my wife and said that if anyone ever got that for me, I would immediately take it outside and burn it, that shit's cursed.
| 1 |
I'm scared that one of my friends might kill themself but I can't tell if its me just worrying
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(I'm new to reddit so if this is formatted weird sorry) Recently I've been worried that one of my friends might kill themself. The reason i think that is because Recently me and my friend have been in two situations where people we know have said they were going to kill themselves as a joke but making it seem like they were. My friend in the past has thought about it and has cut themself but is a couple months clean to my knowledge. I don't know what to do because I feel like if I ask them that they will kill themself and idk why but its been effecting my sleep and daily day to day life because I'm constantly worried.
| 1 |
I lost interest in anything and feel empty.
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Why do I feel so empty? That the question I alway asking myself. And the answer is idk, idk what is wrong with me. Everyday I feel like nothing but an empty shell a hollow body. I don’t want to do anything not because I’m lazy, but because idk what I want to do. Everyday I alway have to put fake smile pretend to be happy but deep inside there is nothing. Is this what they call depression? Or am I being dramatic?
| 9 |
I'm afraid this has become normal for me.
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I'm worried that others attempts at helping me are for some reason causing great fear. I'm worried that I don't recognize when others are trying to help. Please don't let me live out the rest of my life like this. Please don't give up on me. If you tried to help me and it didn't work, please forgive me. My head isn't right but I do want help. Please, I need to be rescued. I want to be rescued. Please have patience with me. Please.
| 1 |
Someone talk to me
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I’m mentally drained and having a panic attack someone please help
| 1 |
Scatterbrained
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I just re-joined the military and have moved across the country from Boston to Oklahoma City (big base here). Obviously lots of change: new job, location, people, etc., but I’ve never been so scatterbrained in my life! Forgetting things left and right. I’ll walk back in a room three times to get what I wanted to get the first time. People ask me basic questions and I blank. Super distracted (literally almost crashed because I was lost in a train of thought while driving). I do feel anxious but not to the point to justify this.
I’ve been working out more which has been helping but does anyone have any suggestions to get out of this crazy loop?
| 1 |
I’ve lost hope
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Hey guys. I’ve (24F) been struggling severely with my mental health since I was very young, probably about ten. I started seeking out/ receiving mental health treatment when I was 20, and the last 5 years I’ve been consistently in and out of inpatient/residentials/ php’s etc. However, I’ve never successfully completed all levels of care in a program (like stepping down to IOP and ‘graduating’) despite the number of times I’ve attempted this. The programs have always referred me out to a different speciality of program, administratively discharged me, or I’ve dropped out due to treatment fatigue/ relapse etc. I have Borderline Personality Disorder, PTSD, a substance use disorder that I can’t seem to get under control no matter how many meetings I go to, an eating disorder that comes and goes in severity, OCD, and bad anxiety/ panic disorder. My life is honestly a nightmare right now where I can barely get out of bed and brush my teeth. I feel so much emotional pain that it almost feels physically debilitating at times. I was diagnosed with Primary Ciliary Dyskinesia last week and the potential prognosis is depressing as all hell. I feel so guilty for what I’ve put my family and friends through that sometimes I feel physically sick. For a long time now I’ve been feeling like my loved ones would be significantly better off without me. Today is especially hard. I can’t seem to picture my future at all, especially something positive or even livable. I’m losing hope each day that it’s ever going to get better. I’ve been trying really fucking hard for years and I genuinely don’t see the point in trying if I’m going to live life in so much pain. I know this is kind of selfish and I’m not actively suicidal, but I’m kind of at wits end and my brain is convincing me that my family would get over losing me/ not caring as much about their reaction to my death. The only thing historically keeping me from suicide at low points and that’s caused me to abort my two attempts in the past is not wanting to hurt my loved ones. But I’m hurting them so much already by being alive. I hate myself so fucking much and I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.
| 1 |
I was kidnapped by aliens but is afraid of ever telling anyone in real life
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In 1998 I was kidnapped by a ufo that performed some sort of medical check on me. I haven't told anyone in real life out of fear of them not believing me. Back when it happened I found support on the internet on various forums and bulletin boards, but today even people on the internet thinks I am making it up.
The only exceptions are people who are really into aliens and ufos, and have elaborate, almost cult-like beliefs about it. I am just a regular guy who was 23 years old when I was beamed into a ufo and probed for what felt like about 45 minutes.
I used the flair "venting" because it's not something that is affecting my every day life, but it is very frustrating.
| 4 |
If people are considered "unforgiveable" and "irredeemable" for their actions, what's stopping them from hurting more people?
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I often sympathize with bad people more than I do for victims on account that I'm also a bad person and I consider being hated to be among the worst things that could ever happen to someone. I'm wondering, if somebody is going to be irredeemable anyway, what's the reason they should stop hurting more people? Other than "oh, it's wrong"? Obviously someone isn't going to empathize with people who hate them, so why would they stop? If hurting people meant it was the only thing that could make you happy, and nobody is ever going to like, love, or empathize with you, what's the point of changing your actions? What are the benefits? You can't say it would make you a good person, because you'll never be a good person based on your unforgiveable actions. I know most people consider themselves to be good, I don't expect any other bad person who might agree with me to come out into the open, but does anyone at least somewhat see my point?
| 1 |
how do I know what I should go to a psych ward?
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I am currently going through a big panic attack, sucidal thoughts, and self-harm urges after my first therapy appointment with my new therapist. I feel insane and I think I need help. I'm on anti-depressant medication, but I don't think it's been working. I dont know if its bad enough to go to a psych ward and I'm worried about the cost but I seriously need help
| 2 |
cant afford professional help
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So I suspect I may have ADHD im not sure tho cause I can’t afford mental care. I feel bad asking my parents for help bc my mom has cancer and has her own medical bills to deal with. My mental health has gotten to a point where it feels like I can’t function regularly 24/7. Some days are better than others but it has not been consistent, I don’t know what to do as I can’t get real help or even a diagnosis and it’s starting to really affect my life and relationships. Any tips please I would love to see improvement in my life
| 1 |
how do i stop crying over small things
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i literally can’t stop crying over the dumbest things. i have a history of depression and anxiety and this is really getting out of hand rn. why is this happening and more importantly how do i stop it
| 1 |
Two, not close, acquaintances killed themselves this weekend.
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Not sure I chose the correct "flair". I should preface this by saying I live in a small town. Like, probably less than 10,000 permanent residents.
Two people I know through my work killed themselves this weekend. They are people I have tangential connections with. One I worked with to help them achieve something that many would consider a life goal and out-of-reach to many. Though, I do understand that material achievement can be irrelevant when someone is dealing with depression or other mental health issues.
The other one I know because he was the former tenant in the home I now live in. He was evicted because he had mental health issues and drug problems, and I only became aware of the home becoming available for rent after the landlord had determined to evict him. But, I met him during the walk-through, and he is/was a client at my place of work, though through a program I am not involved in. Despite this, I did interact with him at work a couple times.
It's a weird sensation. I am not sad per se. But, I'm not sure how to process this. I feel for the people in their lives who lost someone they cared about and whose lives are hurt through their actions. I can empathize with their likely feelings of futility and mental/physical/emotional exhaustion that brought them to make the choice they did. I've had many dark moments myself, though largely feel safe within my emotions now.
As I said above, I'm just not sure how to process this. I learned about both of their passings today at work and its weird to go from hearing these things to just "a normal day at work".
I'd appreciate anyone's thoughts.
| 1 |
i really hate being looked at and have a shitty self image
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I've been working out a bunch and keeping track on what I eat, but it really bothers me when people look my way. It makes me not wanna go out in public whatsoever anymore and it makes me feel incredibly ashamed that I even exist on the same earth as skinny/attractive people. I've always struggled with a bad self image but ever since summer started and I've really gotten to stay at home in my own company, I feel like It's getting worse and worse. Whenever I go outside I can't stop either staring at the ground or comparing myself to whatever stranger is in front of me and honestly, I feel unsightly and ugly. It's gotten so bad that I can't ride in cars with the window down or without a window shade thing, because I'm afraid someone might see me. I also can't seem to lose weight at all, even though I'm only eating about 1000 calories a day and exercise every single day.
| 2 |
I want to hurt myself when I break down
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When I get super worked up or upset about something, usually an argument with my husband, I sometimes get so worked up that I want to choke myself or bang my head on something hard or hit myself in the head or something. I just want to get rid of the pain or sometimes it’s because I feel the need to punish myself. I don’t want to actually cause harm to myself but I want to hurt myself if that makes sense. I don’t want to accidentally do something I don’t mean to, I don’t want to die or break something. I just don’t know how to cope with those feelings of wanting so bad to hurt myself. I just need some advice or something to help.
| 3 |
Does anyone have any advice/insight for being able to take care of my own wants and needs
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I’m tired.
I’m tired of picking up a game that I love and not making it to the end. I’m tired of having years worth of backlog of video games and movies that I desperately want to play/watch yet can’t make myself do it. I’m tired of having a passion for creating art that I continually get “mentally blocked” from. I’m tired of not being able to learn a new skill. I’m tired of being socially isolated in my room and hardly ever leaving the house. I’m tired of being lonely. I’m tired of never finishing anything. I’m tired of being “stuck” in the same pattern, doing the same thing.
every. single. day.
There are so many things I wish I could simply just DO. I don’t enjoy my everyday life, but I want to. I spend my time doing things I’m tired of and hate yet I continue to do them? Why?
I’m unsatisfied with my current life. I know what I wish my life was. Yet I can never force myself to move towards it.
Anytime there’s anything that I need or want I am unable to get it for myself. Why? Even the most simple thing like going to the bathroom or eating a damn meal?
I’ll sit with the discomfort and pain of being hungry for hours before making a meal for myself. I don’t want to do that. I think to myself “I’m hungry” “I want to eat” “my stomach hurts” “all I have to do is start” yet every time it takes all my effort and more. Why?!
Why is EVERYTHING so hard to do? It’s not like I don’t want to do them. I’m literally incapable of taking care of my own wants and needs. I’m tired of this. What am I supposed to do?
Is this inertia? I think this is what inertia feels like. Executive dysfunction? Anxiety? Depression? ADHD? Autism? Or all of them?
How can I take care of my own wants and needs? No matter how simple(eating, going to the bathroom, just turning on/off the tv, changing sitting positions when I’m uncomfortable) or how difficult/complex(learning to draw, socializing, learning to drive) it always feel so difficult?
I don’t know what to do.
| 1 |
Lower than I’ve ever been
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Question at end
Posted before about trying to get healthy after neglecting every aspect of my health for years but I don’t think I’ve ever been lower. I wrote my note this evening. Not going to do anything but I wrote it. I’ve felt like my hormones are all out of wack which I’ve attributed to unstable moods over the past 4 months but I went to a specialist and he said everything looks fine. And maybe that’s a good thing but when you’re hoping for answers and don’t get any it’s extremely discouraging. I’m just diagnosed GAD right now but with how it’s been over the past 4 months I’m wondering if it could be bipolar disorder or BPD. Which seem scarier than GAD. I think I’m just realizing I’m much sicker than I thought and I’m feeling isolated because of it and like my whole world is crushing down around me.
I need support. No one in my life knows how bad it is. I don’t have anyone in my life I can share with about how bad it is. So my question is where do I go for support? I’m in therapy once a week but how do I find people on the internet who I can talk to about these things until I’m able to reach out to people irl for help?
| 1 |
How do you feel ok?
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I feel like the last two years the only thing I can do to feel ok is when I’m absolutely, utterly, distracted by something, more often than not it ends up being chasing numbers (getting high grades on uni work, ranking high in games) and whenever I stop doing that everything immediately catches up to me - The harsh reality that I don’t trust anyone, that I’m lonely, and I feel powerless to do anything about it. I just want time to pass. I wish I knew how to feel ok. I wish I had the energy to go through with… whatever that is.
| 1 |
Schizophrenic Father
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My dad has been diagnosed with schizophrenia and bipolar disorder my whole life. I’m 21. Recently, it’s been so unbearable living with him. He’ll constantly come into my room and rant to me about random conspiracies he has about different people, family members, etc. He even started having conspiracies about my professors. It sucks to see him like this because I know it’s just his illness talking, but I feel like my mental health is declining being in this house. I want to move out soon but I feel guilty leaving my mother and younger brother behind with him. We’ve called the cops on hun multiple times but he always gets sent back home within weeks or a month. Has anyone else been in a similar situation? I just feel alone and that no one really understands what’s happening. What should I do?
| 1 |
Getting emotional of people from internet?
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Hello, so im diagnosed with social anxiety,
And i sometimes type with people from internet, problem is that when we talk for more than few weeks, im getting emotional about them, when they dont care about me it results my mood in real life. Is that reason to start therapy?
| 1 |
How do I find in person peer support groups near me?
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Is there a good way to find in person support groups I could go to? I've been searching around but it's mainly been checking site to site of individual organizations listing groups affiliated with them. I'm looking mainly for free peer run support groups in person. I'd like to find a group for social isolation and social anxiety but any open topic discussion group would be good. I wouldn't mind commuting a bit either.
I've found a few from some directories but they're for issues I'm not looking for like substance abuse and bipolar depression. I know it’s kind of hard with covid finding in person meet ups but it’d even be good to just find people in my area with similar struggles as me, but I’m not sure where to look.
| 2 |
any tips to stop thinking all the time about past bad experiences/anxious thoughts?
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Need help please thank you
| 2 |
My brother (24M) is driving me crazy.
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I'm going through a difficult period in my life, and my mental health is not at its best. Right now, I really need time alone to feel comfortable, find peace, and have some silence and calmness. Unfortunately, my brother doesn't allow me to have those things, and it's making me feel like I'm losing my mind.
To provide some context, we live together, and moving out is not common in our country. Recently, my parents decided to get a divorce, and my mom left the house. Now I live with my dad, even though I don't want to. I'm not allowed to see my mom either. As a result, I spend most of my time at home.
The problem is that no matter what I'm doing, my brother always feels the need to give his opinion or wants me to do things his way, even when I didn't ask for it. For example, if I'm in the kitchen doing something, he comes and starts talking nonstop, telling me how to do it differently, even though my way works for me. The same goes for other activities throughout my day, big or small.
Initially, I used to let him talk and just listen without responding, to avoid hurting his feelings. But when it became too much, I politely asked him to let me do my own thing without forcing his perspective on me. Unfortunately, he didn't want to stop and got angry, saying he was only trying to give me suggestions to help me. I feel like he's trying to control every aspect of my life, no matter how insignificant.
Today, he wanted to give me his unwanted input on something I have no control over because someone else will be handling it. I was really craving silence and didn't want to hear anyone talking, especially about something I didn't care about. When I asked him to talk to me about it tomorrow because I needed some alone time, he refused and insisted I listen.
I'm not sure how to deal with this situation anymore. It's driving me to the point of losing my sanity. My boundaries are completely disregarded, and I have no one to turn to for help or to talk to about this. I've reached a stage where I don't even want to hear his voice, or it will drive me crazy. I know I might come across as selfish, but it's not about not letting him express himself or share his thoughts. It's about needing some peace and space to be myself.
| 1 |
Struggling with mental breakdowns
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I (24F, with history of OCD, depression and anxiety) keep suffering from mental breakdowns. They started in 2019. Ever since 2016 I’ve been had multiple traumas and major life events. In these breakdowns I scream on the top of my lungs, I keep crying, I often hurt myself both accidentally and intentionally, I feel like I experience extra strength. During this time I feel helpless and I just want to end it all. It takes a day or two for me to calm down. Usually it’s triggered by things that can be dismissed easily but I just lose complete control. I feel like I can’t even try to calm down. I hurt people around me with my words and I hate it. It’s so embarrassing the things I say, the things I do and for me to be seen like that. I used to have these breakdowns multiple times a year, recently I tried to work on myself, I’ve had only one last year and another one this year. However I feel like they increased in the intensity. The most recent one was the worst one so far. I felt like I was filled with rage and hatred. I didn’t sleep for 2 days, and only ate after 40 hours. For 2 days straight I kept thinking about what happened, I analyzed every word and every action, felt like my brain was going to explode. You’d think that I slept after 2 days but I’ve had only 4 hours of sleep. I try to be a good and a kind person all the time but this one left truly believing that I am a bad person. Now I don’t know what to do, I’m so sad and angry all the time, I don’t want for my beloved ones to hate me and for my life to be ruined. I’m so sad, so stressed and tired, I don’t want to be here anymore. I don’t know if this is a behavioral or mental problems. Does anyone experience something similar or at least have an explanation for what I’m going through? What do you guys think I should do?
| 0 |
Is metal health real?
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May someone explain the scientific explanation of what causes metal health, thank you
| 1 |
Love for all you ❤️
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From long term relationships, to short term, to delusionalship, this is for you.
Why is it when we break up, you can’t stop but go over anything you could’ve changed or said anything you could’ve done different
Why do we fall in love with an illusion of someone, even if their actions show different
Why do we fall for a version of someone that we’ve created in our head
Why do we fall for someone when we know damn well we deserve better than what they offer
Why do we care so much about someone that ruined our appetite and sleep
Why do we care so much about someone that used us, used us until there was nothing more to use
Why do we stay with someone that degrades us and makes us feel like we’re not good enough
Why do we care so much about someone that gave up on us so easily
Why do we care so much about someone that was unsure about you, that treated you like an option
Why do we care so much about that person that made you mentally and physically drained
Why do we care so much about this person that’s on your mind?
You have a big heart. Heavy one possibly. You go over all these little scenario’s in your head, just wondering if you could just change some things, how different it couldn’t been. You’ve probably created an illusion of this person in your head. How they could’ve treated you. You went through every little scenario on how you could’ve kept this person around.
This person isn’t your person.
Your person wouldn’t give you this horrible feeling. Sometimes we say “right person wrong time.” But in reality the right person would’ve stayed with you during the “wrong time”
Cheers to healing a broken heart 💜
I’m struggling too.
| 1 |
Going through it mentally - not sure what can be done
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I feel like I'm not ok. Nothing has felt worth doing for a long time and everything leaves me feeling unsatisfied. I have to force myself to get up and do things like school, work, or even feed myself a lot of the time. Sometimes I'll lay in bed all day and not have the energy or motivation to do anything, even when I know I have something important. When I'm not feeling like I'm stuck in a funk, I can be easily irritable and pessimistic. I don't know if what I'm experiencing is normal human angst or if it's something more serious. I have been wanting to see a professional for counseling but I'm uninsured and don't have the money to go out of pocket, nor a way to get myself to the doctor's. Not sure what I can do, or if there's anything that can even be done in my situation.
| 1 |
Am I thinking irrationally or logically?
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I've been living at home teaching part time in an ESL job for 7 years. Due to where I live (mostly young families with restaurants and nail salons with nothing else), I haven't made any friends beyond my one friend here. To cut a long story short - I went to college, left with an MA in TV and Radio Production, failed to get a job, ended up back here and taught ESL for two years. Then left for the UK and did an MSc in Visual Effects. When I was over there I made acquaintances but I never made any true friends, I always felt alone in some way. I finished that, applied for jobs, couldn't pass interviews, ended up back here again. Spent another year here, and then embarked on a PhD in American literature (which was my strongest subject in college so I thought why not try to pursue the dream of becoming an academic). I ended up friendless besides one friend I met intermittently for 3 years. In the last two years I made 2 of the best friends of my life but it required a tonne of work and sheer luck to meet them. I was pretty isolated and alone besides this. Again same story, finished degree, couldn't get a job, ended up back here, this time for 7 years and counting because I really, really wanted to be an academic, got a few interviews after 5 years of applications, nothing.
Now I have a choice - I can either do a PGCE in teacher training in the UK or I can continue to stay here and do an online course in Instructional Design. I really want to leave and find a social life again but I have a distinct impression based on past experience, I'm going to be alone. I don't even like the idea of being a teacher with all the bullshit they are expected to put up with in the UK but most of my work experience leans this way (not by choice). With Instructional Design, I'd feel more comfortable with the work but will feel like I'm choosing institutionalization by living at home rather than being independent because I've become to used to living at home. On the other hand, I hate landlords and most of my dealings with them have been terse because I tend to butt heads in some form or other with authority, it feels like I'm burning my money just to be "independent".
Anyways, it's kind of like I know I'm not resilient or made of the right stuff for being a teacher though I've taught ESL and at university. However the suited and booted school environment was never where I wanted to be and I clashed with it as a teenager, even as an adult it irks me. However it might be the safest choice jobs wise. On other hand I feel like my life is kind of over so why try to restart something that's finished? I tried several things, none of them worked, I'm not up to much of anything because I'm not good enough, the failed career starts, friendlessness, lack of relationships, countless job rejections and failed interviews suggest this strongly. Shouldn't I just make my peace with it? Even if that means being friendless and not having a relationship, why would I expect to find those things if I move abroad given past experience? People detect that I'm weird and a loser and avoid on instinct. All I'll be doing is punishing myself more. Yet I also think this isn't rational thought and I just want to stay in my comfort zone. Conversely if I go over, I may be letting myself in for a world of hurt, by not being up to the task of teacher training. ID is the slower, quieter, safer approach. My head is going in loops about this. The problem lies with me, who and what I am, which in turn leads back to the unsalvageable life conclusion. But I can't stomach that either, I want to live again.
| 1 |
I'm forgetting who my old self was. All of a sudden I feel no motivation or desire for anything.
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The past year or so I dealt with abusive parents and a horrible hearing problem that came up last summer. Over the year I just felt myself withering away and with poor memory I can't remember what I thought or felt.
I was very imaginative and intuitive, detecting hidden meanings in everything came across, feeling those hidden meanings, constructing very elaborate logical systems all in my head. I loved who I was but a month ago all of a sudden I just couldn't feel any motivation to do anything and could barely focus. Now, It feels that my knowledge is limited to everything in my vicity rather than contemplating everything beyond. It feels like an illusion or filter whenever I try contemplating anything. I want to believe that old me is still hidden deep inside, that this illusion will pass when I heal and I'll be better than before. I held my understanding of my worldview and rapid insights so close to my heart, I regret never writing them down and I'm starting to forget most of it. I want to heal and be better than my old self and get rid of this filter that contradicts everything I believed in. I wish I could uncover my mind and find that old girl in me who was wise.
| 1 |
Having curiosity problems need advice
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I think of crazy dumb ideas and almost do them like put my finger through a fan and see what happens
| 1 |
I feel broken and desperate. Help, I don't know what to do anymore.
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If I didnt have strong reasons to stay alive (for example like family & friends) I would have already killed myself.
I'm in so much mental pain. I experience all of the negative emotions but none of the positive ones. Thats daily life for me, has been like it for years. I'm diagnosed with depression and autism I'm also suffering from anxiety sometimes. Tried both therapy and medication, both didnt make any positive significant change for me.
I feel like I'm at the bottom of a bottomless pit. I've sunk so deep in all these negative feelings that I see no way out anymore. I waste my days 24/7, unable to do productive things because my willpower works like a 100 year old phone battery. I focus hard for 5 minutes and its over for the rest of the day.
My dad recently got sick and died soon after unexpectedly so that adds to my mental suffering. Grief, stress, anxiety...
Therapy did nothing, medication did nothing, family and friends want to help me but there is nothing they can do for me.
I live in 24/7 mental pain and the only reason I'm alive for is that there would be big negative consequences if i killed myself. I want to die but I also want to live.
I guess I will keep going in this life, but I don't know how. I don't want to continue living in pain. How can I stop suffering?
| 1 |
Feeling/being happy is just so weird for me
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I dont know i like being happy obviously
But then right after i kinda hate it
I mean even when im happy i have this slight dislike for my happiness
Its feels so invalidate being happy
Like all my struggles are just stupid and im no struggling
Being happy makes me feel stupid
I feel like a liar i feel like a pretender
I feel like shit honestly why am i like this
| 1 |
20th birthday alone
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Hi, I dont have any friends and had trouble making new ones for a while now, i have a bad habit of isolating myself when things go bad but they never seem to get better. I did not get to celebrate either my 18th or 19th birthday and i dont want to spend my 20th one alone again.
I feel lonely most of the time and dont know what to do.
| 1 |
Are therapys realy helpfull?
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Long story short i am introverted with social anxiety and year long depression lately i lost the only reason i had in live and i cant feel any emotions except sadness anymore. The problem is everybody would says i should get therapy be it irl or online but i dont see the point im a logical person mostly that is stuborn in its believes and i dont get how a therapist would be helpful he isnt your friend and you would just get 1h talking to a stranger that propably never was in your situation beside that they are even expensive and i dont think they actualy care for people and beside in what is he suposed to help me? get friends that will just leave me after time and it becomes a one sided relation or will they magicaly make me happy again i was thinking about ending myself for a long time and i dont know what to do anymore any advises if therapy actualy realy helps and why?
| 1 |
Coping strategies for aunt with severe (and in denial ) MH issues ?
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Hi Redditors !! I come to you with questions about how you deal with a relative who has a just-about-high-functioning (i.e. she's able to support herself , get from A to B) aunt who has severe anxiety and neurosis, but to the point where she's incredibly difficult to be around in terms of being snappy , controlling and hysterical (yes, as a feminist and historian I *hate* that word but it is very appropriate for this person, sadly.) Everyone treads on eggshells all the time. Problem is, she's in denial that she is the problem, she just thinks that life is really stressful (specifically *her* life - which it's not, really, she just makes every minute of her every day stressful for herself) and that everyone else just doesn't understand. But yeah, she won't seek help. But she's impossible to be around for more than 20 minutes. But I come from a culture where you don't just cut family out. She's incredibly intertwined in the family. And she has many positive qualities in terms of generosity and putting other people's needs first (sometimes too much! ). So the only option we're left with is just trying to 'manage' her behaviour, but to be honest, it's just getting worse with age and we're all at our wit's end, she's started triggering everyone else's dormant issues . How do we cope ?! We want to help her as much as we want her to get better from a selfish perspective.
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How do I stop this cycle of overthinking so I can stop ruining my relationships?
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Question/Vent
20f, battling mental health problems since I was very young. Anxiety, depression both diagnosed, strong symptoms of BPD though undiagnosed.
As a start, I've been in around 8 relationships, each one ending because of how quick I am to overthink a situation. Whenever I tend to overthink, it feels like a strong intuition feeling on some things that end up being correct, such as, I've felt like an ex was cheating on me, he was, I felt like one couldn't figure out how to break things off, and that's how he felt. Well right now, my 19m boyfriend (2 years and counting) has seemed distant and far less communicative lately. I'm not sure how to go about asking or mentioning anything without it seeming like I'm falling right back down the rabbit hole, but this cycle will not stop unless I do not have that communication, or I press until things eventually do break off because of it. I have a constant worry that I will be abandoned and discarded yet again that is incredibly hard to shake no matter how many times I try to reassure myself that things are okay, and he'll break things off if that's what he wants to do. But the voice in the back of my head also adds and contradicts, if he wanted to talk to me, he would, and it doesn't seem like he does. I don't want to go crazy again and destroy everything. I have no funds or insurance for therapy, no one to fall back onto that won't say, "girl, leave."
I'm at another loss that I know I can't deal with.
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Being overly frustrated because of my own qualities
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Dear Community,
Not sure if this is the right place to leave this but looking for advice..
All my life I've struggled with the bad habit of judging myself very critically, for example during gaming, sports or during my studies when I knew it was my own fault for not doing something right. It's not so much about being able to process my loss, because if it's justified I can handle it just fine. However, when it is clear that it is due to my own qualities, it can really bother me. This manifests itself in the following way.
During sports, such as Padel or football, for example, I can become so fanatical that, for example smash a ball wrong myself, or give a bad pass in football, I get overly frustrated. Immediately after the mistake I hear in my head “you can't dot it, and you're a loser, you fail and everyone sees it.” Which results in a grumpy version of me and my friends can see that, which I also find embarrassing. And no, I'm not a professional padeller or footballer, but there's a difference between missing once or playing a little less and making it difficult for myself out of frustration.
Another example is while playing one of the most toxic online game out there, League of Legends. It will always be the most fun video game out there for me, so quitting is not an option. Every now and then I play again and then again for a while. However, I also notice that because of my frustration even those I play with who are friends don't even have a good time anymore because they notice I'm frustrated and start sighing and complaining.
I am aware of this now, maybe that is step 1. However, I also want to have a way to learn how to deal with this. I thought it was a bit exaggerated to go to a psychologist for this because I don't suffer from this every day or week, but who knows, that's the solution, no idea.
Any tips? Thanks already!
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What should I do to help him?
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For about 6 months or so my son 19 yo son has been very different. His whole demeanor has changed. He used to enjoy traveling and doing things and now he hardly hangs out. He was a bit depressed but now I see that he has anxiety and seems nervous all the time. He also started to vape and drinking alcohol. I tried talking to him about it. He won't talk to me. I hear him talking to himself and laughing all the time. I think he hear voices. I tried to get him to go see a psychiatrist, but he refused to even discuss it. His symptoms are
trouble sleeping, anxiety, poor memory and bizarre behavior laugh for no reason- talking to himself- bitting his cheek- going to the gym 2-3x a day. I know he's not doing other drugs because I monitor his bank account and I do check his room.
He recently told me he was worried about his future. He was attending college but failed all his classes. He also got a job but they let him go because he didn't complete his tasks. Now he's interested in the Navy. I support it 💯 but I know he's not mentally stable to pursue his career right now.
This weekend we went to the movies. While I was driving he opened the car door 2x and started laughing. He would turn his head to one side and laughing and mumble something. The same thing in happened in the theater. When I ask him what he's laughing about. He just says nothing. This behavior is not him at all.
I would any advice/insight you may have!
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I need some advice
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Ive been unwell for quite some time now. I sometimes hear someone calling my name even if no one is around. Anyways a few minutes ago i was sitting at my desk drawing something when i think i saw a large bug crawling up my wall so i went to get a glass to throw it out. When i came back it was just gone and my room is fairly emply. I looked everywhere but i cant find it. It simply vanished there are also no possible cracks in the floor or wall it could hide in.
So im asking could this have been a hallucination with some detail?
Ive been having hallucinations but not with such great detail...
Anyways thank you for any help!
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Is reflecting too much bad? I'm trying to be more self-aware.
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I feel like I reflect a lot on my life. I space out and think about my past actions whether they're good or bad. I feel like I'm always trying to make the right decision on how to act properly. However, I feel like I reflect so much too the point where I'm not self-aware.
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I’m really stuck
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Big ol trigger warning for this entire post
I am really in a bad place at the minute and don’t really know how to vent without just telling my story, so here goes I guess. I’m not looking for sympathy, I just want to get it all off my chest. So here goes I guess. (For context I am 20 years old and non-binary (AMAB)).
At age 14 I went into hospital for spinal fusion surgery to correct scoliosis. What was meant to be a week in hospital for a pretty routine procedure ended up a nearly three-month stay, during which my wound was infected and I had to be re-admitted into surgery. I was getting pumped full of antibiotics four times a day including in the middle of the night, and ended up with swollen veins due to the amount of cannula tubes that kept breaking or leaking inside my arm. I spent my 15th birthday in hospital. My recovery suffered massively as I couldn’t do the physical rehabilitation one would receive after scoliosis surgery, and I never ended up having it. Now at 20 years old I’m constantly in pain and my mobility feels like it’s getting worse by the day. I left with what I now realise was depression and crippling anxiety. I was always a pretty reserved but always happy kid, but post surgery I became a depressed paranoid wreck. I shut off and wanted to end it. I said to myself “I doubt I’m gonna last till the end of secondary school.” I convinced myself my body was disgusting and hated seeing myself in a mirror. I still feel like this most of the time.
I ended up getting through school and into college. I was making progress, then covid happened. And my world felt like it had fallen apart. I started drinking heavily and began to wallow in my depression. I also experienced sexual assault at the hands of one of my male friends weeks after I’d come out as bisexual, which ruined me. 17 year old me didn’t want to be alive anymore. And to this day I’m still trying to work through the trauma.
I’m writing this nearly three years later. I’ve moved away to university and my mental health is worse than ever. While things got a lot better for me initially (new friends, new city etc.) I feel as though I’ve tried to outrun it and it’s caught up with me. I’ve tried therapy and am on medication which doesn’t make me feel any better, instead just making me more miserable and lethargic and I really don’t know what to do. I feel like I’ll never be happy again.
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why do I not feel emotions?
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I don't really feel any emotions like happiness or sadness for as long as I can remember. I don't even feel sad but still end up crying at night almost every day. I am not sure if something is wrong with me or this is normal at my age? I really want to feel something even if its pain at this point
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I think I'm autistic and might have ADHD. I need advice.
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Hi, I'm Miles (15M). Before I get into this, I'd like to disclose (because these appear differently in different genders somehow), I was assigned female at birth.
I think I may have autism and/or ADHD. I grew up with hispanic and portuguese parents, and they don't really see eye-to-eye with mental health and learning disorders like autism and ADHD. So when I first brought this up with my mom, she shut me down immediately. I won't even try with my dad as he's a "suck-it-up and move on" guy.
Growing up (and these issues still persist to this day), I struggled with school a lot. I couldn't learn as well as my peers and I had so much trouble with reading comprehension (still kind of do) that my school personally reached out to my parents to help me learn at home as well. As I got older, math became a huge problem for me too. I couldn't deal with numbers and how math was changing and evolving so fast. I used to sob my eyes out whenever my dad had to help me with homework because I felt so lost.
Now I've stopped asking for help even though I struggle with math so much more. English is becoming better for me since I've started writing my own stories.
It wasn't only subjects that I struggled with either. Growing up, I had only one friend and I seemed to not be able to make any more than just that. People found me weird, and I usually could never understand whether they were laughing with me or at me. Like most quiet kids, I was targeted by more popular ones. They'd come up to me and pretend like we were best friends, and at the time I felt it was sweet and it made me feel good, but I've since learned they were making fun of me.
I don't fit in anywhere I go, and I can't even talk to my teachers because I'm afraid they'll pity me.
I was recently diagnosed with anxiety and depression because I suddenly stopped showing up to school during 7th grade (the year schools fully reopened after covid) and would barely even get out of bed. It wasn't a decision on my parents' end, it was the school's social worker. It was either that or we'd be taken to court.
I understand both diagnoses, but I feel it's a lot more than just that. Nobody will listen to me. Everywhere I go, I'm isolated and I feel I'll never find a place where I'm comfortable being me. I can't quote the things I love, or hum, or fidget around in my seat, or sway back in forth while in a line. I can't do that stuff because society deems it "weird" and "childish" and I shouldn't be acting that way because I'm 15.
I don't know what to do. I feel like a diagnosis could really help lift a weight off my chest, to help me stop feeling so confused and blaming my brain whenever someone tells me I'm too loud or too quiet or too dumb or too smart. It would give me a cushion to fall back onto when people look at me weird in public because I was flapping my hands after seeing the grocery store has my favorite chips.
I stick to strict routines, and I hate being taken off track but I often do get sidetracked because I feel so restless and I know I'm supposed to be making my bed but the floor is dirty and my phone needs to be charged, and I seem to have forgotten I had food in the oven.
I don't want to self-diagnose but I've done so much research and I am almost 100% convinced I have ADHD and autism.
If anyone can tell me what to do, or even give me some insight as to what's going on in my head, it would be greatly appreciated. I will answer any questions you have if you are unclear about something or just want to know more.
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I feel like I'm wasting my life
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I'm 15 and when I tell people I feel like this all I get told is 'you've got your whole life ahead of you' but I don't. my mental health hasn't got any better and it's been years. I only have 3 years until I'm 18. I just want someone to help me and to actually care. I'm not worth help and I just don't know what to do. I've tried to end my life a few times, luckily the last time was a month before my birthday and since then the feelings of wanting to die haven't been as bad but the fact that I've tried to kill myself a few times already scares me, I haven't done even half the things I want to do and I might not even get the chance. I love living but I don't see the point anymore. I just don't know what to do, I really don't want to die but it feels like my only option
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I have a (kind of) weird struggle with Maths
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I'm a big math fan, I love it. But I do have a kind of struggle with it. It goes like this:
Assume a math problem, or anything about math that can be solved, expanded, written down and everything else on that line.
The moment I see the "problem" my brain flashes either the answers, some steps to do for the answers, things to do to orient me with the problem
I start to put down what my mind created, and eventually find the solution (If I do find it). But there's the weird part. When I find the solution, my mind is cleared. Completely. If I see the process I took to solve the problem, I don't understand a thing. It takes me a while, a big while, to start to understand what I wrote, why I wrote that etc,
The problem is, it doesn't happen only when I solve the problem. This can happen when I accidentally get distracted, or even worse, while I'm solving it. I'm not kidding when I say that maybe while I solve the problem, my mind goes blank and I don't understand what I just wrote, what I wrote before what I just wrote and what I wrote at all. It happened way too many times that I write down things that got me really close to the answer, but suddenly my mind goes blank and I don't understand anything I wrote, even the things I wrote seconds before the death of my mind. There's an incredible amount of numbers that I start writing with full einstein mode and end writing without knowing why i'm writing them, circles that have no apparent reason to exist, even though they were probably the most important step for the solution etc, etc,
What do you think the problem can be?
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I don’t have a best friend.
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I don’t really know what else to say, the few people I hang around the most are always referring to their best friends (others) it didn’t bother me at first, but now with everything else it’s like daggers, I don’t have a person of my own, no best friend (at least someone who values me as such) the intrusive thoughts always use this against me. I’m a fucking loser trying not to be a fat piece of shit, I’m not there yet but I’m trying. Scattered thoughts, I apologize but im a mess trying to sort myself out so I can help others sort themselves out too but I’m a failure at that.
Someday, most likely not I’ll find my best friend maybe even the one just for me. Most likely I’ll die like my dad did, broken and alone, with less though, he at least had me.
Again sorry for the mad ramblings of a fat loser.
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Betterhelp
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Does the $40/week membership with one live therapy session a week also include the weekly group sessions?
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Am I being too sensitive?
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Lately I (m29) have noticed that my environment is getting on my nerves. I don’t know if I’ve become too sensitive or that my environment is being particularly rude. During the last couple of days I have had several encounters that made me feel uneasy and that feeling seems to increase. I will briefly explain what happened during three particular occasions.
Last Sunday while hanging out with my friends, we talked about my (and my gf) wish to get a puppy at the end of the year. While discussing potential names, I told them that one of the names we were considering was Bubbles (since we both like bubble water and the character from Trailer Park Boys). They went on a half hour rant about why I was gay (as in homosexual) for considering Bubbles as my dog name. At first I considered it to be an annoying joke, but since it wasn’t the first time they mentioned it and because most of my friends claim to be “woke”, it started to get on my nerves. When I asked them why they thought it was appropriate to call people these names, one of them commented on the clothes I was wearing (which were maybe fancier clothes than they were wearing). I didn’t really appreciate their behavior but most of all thought it was highly hypocritical.
Next day I had a meeting with my boss regarding the visit to the company doctor due to recurring insomnia caused by my maxed out schedule and work overload. A couple of weeks ago he claimed to be very understanding and that I should take enough rest. During the meeting he started to complain about my attendance and performance, stating that my schedule was too empty and that he got complaints because I missed some project meetings. I was quite confused by his comments, since I thought it was clear that I was aiming for a less busy schedule and project scattering. Apparently, one of the project leaders complained that I missed a work session that didn’t fit in my schedule at the time when it was super busy. This didn’t really improve the relationship with my boss, since I’m not really eager anymore to share things with him.
Finally, tonight I was having dinner with my girlfriend and I was elaborating about the previous experiences. She then told me that I should be careful not to become vindictive like my deceased grandfather did. My grandfather was highly successful in life, but became vindictive at some point and developed a character that could be hostile on occasion. Nonetheless I greatly respected him, but also tried hard not to make the same mistakes. It felt like my girlfriend not only disrespected my efforts not to copy bad traits but also disrespected my grandfather since I told stories to her in great confidence, and apparently his bad traits were the only thing she was preoccupied with. She appeared confused when I told her that I couldn’t appreciate her comment at all, and she replied that I was being too sensitive.
Am I becoming too sensitive? I’ve had quite some things to deal with in the past years (which also lead to my recurring insomnia) and I am not sure if that has made me too anxious or if people around me are just acting up.
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Lost my mind in psycharity unit
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So it's all the title says. I have something wrong with me and I need help. So I was in a psych unit for 14 days and iv been in psych units before, but this one sucked ass. So I was in there for 14 days and iv got extreme "anxiety" and it was through the roof in there. I started losing my mind because I couldn't run(exercise) or drink caffeine or smoke or anything to calm me down. So as the days go by I get more and more restless and this always happens, but I got to the point where I was throwing stuff against the wall and couldn't think straight. Everyone else seemed fine, but I can't handle that shit idk why. I was about to attack a guard just to get out of there.
Does anyone know what this or why I get so aggressive and angry and unable to control my emotions after being stuck in a place for long periods of time or anywhere. Do you know anyone like this?
Because everyone else was fine, but I wanted to kill myself I wasn't able to deal with just being there. Its like I have to do something physical or I lose my mind. Thank you
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Summer Depression
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I'm nearly 30 but I work in schools so when summer hits I suddenly have free time.
Every year I hype myself up and remind myself how hard my summer depression hits once I don't have a set schedule. Every year I make myself some sort of routine but once I hit about the 1 week mark I start to get lazy with it and it falls apart.
My partner and I call that first week "shark mode": it feels like if I stop swimming I will drown. (OK shark fact, not all sharks need to keep swimming to force oxygenated water through their gills but some sharks do so we are gonna stick with it). Sharks mode feels good. I usually clean my whole house, do creative projects, finish tasks I've been putting off. Any "free" time I have I spent cramming in productivity. I feel like I can't sit for too long and I am pleasantly tired at night.
Then I get a little tired one day. Maybe I sleep in a bit. Maybe I decide to just sit and read all day. It's my break, I can do what I want. Slowly the chores settle back into just simple mundane tidying and by the 10th day of telling my partner I could handle the dishes for them I just get this "what's the point?" Vibe and it spirals from there.
Everyday starts to feel very much the same and when things disrupt the made up schedule I came up with I start to get unreasonably upset considering it should make no difference if I can't go on my walk today because it's pouring rain but I'm upset nonetheless.
Everywhere I read for support on this they talk about doing your hobbies and keeping a routine but once my routine is even slightly disrupted, even disrupted by "well this is my chores time but I don't really have any chores to do" it unsettles me. I'm having a hard time describing it.
My partner isn't much of a help since he keeps a much more relaxed schedule and seems to do stuff whenever he pleases and nigh refuses to adhere to any schedule at all (he works from home).
I both dread going back to work in september and dread the uninteresting sameness of my summer routine, yet mixing up my routine makes me unreasonably stressed so I feel stuck. I'm now at the point where I get nothing done most days other than reading books, scrolling on my phone, and eating snacks. I know I need to accomplish.plish something to feel better but I can't seem to will myself to do much of anything...
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my addiction is ruining my life
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so im addicted to kim kardashian not in a way that ï'm a big fan of her because honestly i really don't care what she does in her life but every time I see a picture or video of her 1 get an extremely strong urge to jerk off to her and I can't focus on anything else it's bad that i can only get an erection when i look at kim Because of this have I a lot of awkward moments between me and my girlfriend and i am too embarrassed to seek
professional help does anyone have any advice for me -
- this is what my previous post said i've asked you before what i can do but everything i try brings me downhill worth it i honestly have no idea how it got this far the moment i see a photo or video of kim i cum without jerking off it's like my body is commanded to cum the moment i see kim lately i started drinking a lot to get rid of the feeling of failure things are not going well between me and my girlfriend and i know it's my fault
- i live in greece i a small village we only have 1 therapist here but he doesn't take me serious except for him , the nearest therapist is almost an hour and a half by car away what should I do
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GF depressed and hates herself and I can't bear to see her like that anymore
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We've been together for about 6 months now and I knew from day one that she wasn't doing well mentally, but besides that I had great interest in her and got feelings and she made me feel very good. Only I find it very hard to see how she hates herself so much and it makes me very sad. She has severe depression, is suicidal, has traumas, hates her and suffers from mental breakdowns. When this is happening she talks very negatively about herself and says things like 'I want to die, I don't want anymore, I hate myself'. She also keeps saying that I should break up with her and that I am not good for her and deserve better. I just don't know what to do in those situations and it makes me feel very helpless because no matter what I do or say, it just doesn't seem to help that much. She also complains a lot, about many things and I get that because she just has so much sh\*t going on and it's just too much for her to deal with.
She's been getting help for a few years and therapy as well, but for the past 6/7 months it doesn't look like it's getting better really. It's a process that will take a really long time to heal and I feel so bad for her because she deserves so much better.
From the start i knew this was going on, not everything but the most major things tho and I thought I could 'deal' with it (even though obviously she's the one who has to deal with it). But the last few months it's been too hard for me to see her so miserable. I also feel like I can't leave her alone because she can also feel very lonely and miserable. Every now and then when she asks me to stay another night or asks me to come over and I deny and give her a reason why I can't or won't, she sometimes can't be satisfied with my desision and be like 'ok I understand', but she will come up with some sort of counter argument like 'yea but you can do that or this another time' or 'but you can to me after work'. Sometimes I can get a little insecure to give her a reason, because I get a feeling she won't just accept it or something. It's not like I don't want to see her particulary, it's just that I want time for myself as well, every now and then.
Like I said she has trauma going on. her father and mother abused her emotionally and she never felt love. I'm one of the only people who've ever truly loved her. She also abused herself in the past by hitting her head or cutting herself. Fortunately she didn't cut herself for over 240 days, mostly because of me she says.
I love her tho. She makes me feel so good, treats me well, surprises me with presents and listens to me. A lot of things most people would ask for in a relationship, but the key thing I'm missing is happiness and self love.
I just feel like I can't support her and can't give her the happiness. Seeing her miserable almost 24/7 makes me miserable. I feel like breaking up with her because of this, but I just know that if I do she will just lose it and probably harm herself and/or maybe worse and I don't want that to happen obviously.
Please give me some advice on what to do..
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My partner just told me my problems are cringy.
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I'm still very shocked by this. She tried to help me before but I guess she is already at her limits. My mental issues has destroyed me and my relationship. Don't know what to say.
I made a plan to go to a therapist this week. I feel very disappointed that in the end people just want me to shut up and deal with my own problem alone. I am just asking too much.
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I want to kill myself
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i’ve struggled with depression for as long as i can remember, started self harming at the age of 14 and got the strength to stop at 18. I want to relapse. i want to cut myself down to the bone in the bathtub and watch myself bleed out. I no longer believe in God, he’s done nothing to help me. i have no ambition. i have no goals, i have no dreams. all i want to do is sleep and watch stupid tiktok’s. that’s all that brings me joy anymore
my boyfriend broke up with me last night. We had just gone on a two week vacation to 4 different states so i could meet his family. He started ignoring me. he said he doesn’t know me as well as he thought he did. he said our lives don’t match up. he said our personalities don’t work together. he sprung this on me twenty minutes before he dropped me off at home. “i want to thank you for being such a good friend to me”.
why am i so unlovable. what is wrong with me. why am i so broken and dead inside and why can’t i fix myself. why am i so wrong. my head is wrong, my body is wrong, everything about me is wrong and i hate myself so much. i prayed last night for God to take my pain away. he didn’t answer. i prayed to God this morning to just kill me and take me out of my misery. he didn’t answer. no one cares about me. when i express my emotions i’m crazy. when i don’t i’m distant. why am i not good enough??
i just want to die
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I am Going Insane
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I have already been suspect of my issues with mental health. My family has a lengthy history with illnessess along the lines of schizophrenia, depression, BPD, Bipolar, as well as a wealth of anxiety disorders, and I was already declining.
I bottle all of my declining mental issues, which worked until my ex cheated on me twice and then broke up with me. I was sent into a spiral which I have not recovered from. I turned to loads and loads of marijuana ( I got high extensively every night for about 4 months) Which I believe has only made things worse. I do not feel real. Life feels like it has bo meaning. I want my ex back. I feel as though I am slowly going insane and I do not know any way out.
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My entire family shuns me
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Ok so this is a big deal posting for me so plz be nice in the comments. Thx. My entire extended family all plays this one sport. I happen to have worked REALLY hard and I am in the top 5 in UK. However, my siblings who aren’t so good at the sport, as well as below par cousins are more the focus of attention. I know this sounds like I have a massive ego but hear me out plz. Let’s say I turn up to a family gathering and everyone is there. Instead of acknowledging that I even exist, let alone my performance, I am literally in a corner ignored, while others receive praise for just doing it. I.e the other grandchildren in my family have received custom kit at about £2k each and I’m still in second hand kit at international events. Furthermore, I’m starting to feel like I’m non existent to everyone. I just lost my friend group to “being too boring”(no drink, or party, always training) and everyone i train with doesn’t talk to me (I’m the youngest there). I also get blamed for a lot of problems, just average scapegoat stuff. I don’t know what to do, I have no support structure and I’m super introverted, that’s why this is a big deal for me posting on here. Rant over, can anyone suggest a course of action plz?
Thx for reading
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Roommate tried to self harm, not sure what to do
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My roommate is currently laying on my lap after trying to self harm, and fortunately only having minor success at it. He just went through his first break up and is talking about how he wants to die.
I don't know what to do, cause it's so different from when I was suicidal that the same things that helped me won't help him. I might be able to check him into a psych ward, but I don't know if that would actually be the right thing and don't know if he has insurance for it (boo america health system)
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Struggle with family
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My brothers are much older than me. By the time I was three they were in secondary school, and like many teenage boys, they weren’t particularly nice. For the first 10 years of my life, my main memories of them are bad. Now, (I’m 21F) my relationship with them is better, but any little thing they do that might be considered teasing, or even just something mildly unreasonable makes me feel like I’m being treated the way I was when I was little. It makes me cry and react poorly (I shoved one of them today) and I don’t know how to handle it.
I can’t really get therapy because I’ve had to move back in with my parents now I’ve finished uni (even with the two jobs I was working at uni I realised I couldn’t really afford to stay in the relatively-cheap town afterwards) and they don’t believe in therapy. I just need help.
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MENTAL HEALTH/WELLNESS RETREAT
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Hello! I am DESPERATELY looking for a mental health retreat. I'm NOT looking for a silent retreat or something that's mostly yoga and healthy smoothies.
Main things I'm after: Talk therapy 1:1, nature, and freedom of personalization. I don't want a rigid schedule but activities available so I'm not sitting alone 24/7.
Extra things but not necessary: Spa elements, OPTIONAL group activities, promts given for journaling, grief/loss of a loved one theme, etc.
Preferbly somewhere in the USA, looking to go this summer/fall 2023. Budget is around 2-5k but if I have to pay more for better results I will. Thank you(:
| 1 |
I'm 22 and I'm lonelier than ever.
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On Sundays, when I'm in my room, I make the terrible mistake of thinking, and I realized something I never wanted to admit.
Today, I was looking at Instagram and saw a photo of my "friends" from my whole life who were all together at someone's house, having a great time and enjoying themselves. And I asked myself, "When was the last time they invited me?" Since then, I realized that they haven't invited me to anything for years, not even writing me a simple "are you okay?"
With that, I realized that I have never been someone's first choice. I spend my weekends locked up in my room, and sometimes I calculate the number of weekends like that, and I start crying, and it passes, but now something clicked in my mind.
I have never had someone to call my best friend, no one has ever invited me to go out or even asked how I am doing. I can't remember the last time I talked to someone for hours without getting bored, even the Discord group is empty.
I'm afraid of falling back into that spiral of negative thoughts, but at the moment when I realize that the being I have lunch with is my dog and I talk to myself just to socialize with someone in my head.
I never wish this feeling I'm going through on anyone, I hope you have someone who makes you happy.
| 29 |
I have had this feeling of being caged
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I am currently in between my final papers and I love the degree I have chosen it is exciting and interesting. But for the past few days I have been feeling exhausted, feeling like I would puke after every meal, feeling like does anything matter at all?
I feel extremely tired, I have been getting enough sleep but still. My migraine has gotten worse and I'm questioning everything. I'm a person who seeks academic validation ( I'm no nerd but I like scoring decent marks )and the fear of messing my exam has made me spiral. All the fights and stressful situations I have been in are coming back to the surface , i have dealt with them in the past but this time it is far out of my hand. It feels like I'm in a paralysis state, where I wanna study but my mind and my body just can't. I hope this gets over soon.
| 1 |
26F Anxiety and ADHD Abnormal Symptom
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I am 26F and I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression as a child and now maybe ADHD. I am not on any medication for these and overall I feel pretty stable but some might call my anxiety moderate to severe I have just gotten used to living around it since it's been around since I was very young. However, I have had one problem that has occured since I was a child that distrubs me and I can't find out what the cause of this is anywhere online. There are times when I zone out but it's worse than just a typical zoning out, I feel like a different person for sometimes a few minutes or sometimes a few hours. I freeze and I can't move. My body tenses up so hard that I sometimes shake and it's like I am locked in, stuck inside my mind. As i've gotten older this has occured less frequently but I am starting to notice that this happens when I am under a lot of stress or when my ADHD symptoms are worse than usual. Another thing is that I only go into this "state" when I am alone but I can't control how long it will last. It's like I just "snap out of it" and afterwards I feel very foggy, ashamed, and like I just woke up from a 4 hour nap in the middle of the day. When this would occur as a child it didn't affect my day to day or distress me as much but now that I am older it sometimes effects my daily tasks. When I go into this state I can't work, move, eat, talk to anyone or do anything and it's starting to scare me. Sometimes this even causes me to be late because I slip into this state before big social events. Can aynone relate to this or has any advice?
| 1 |
help with UK services
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has anyone had experiences with the uks adult mental health services im scared to call them back about an initial assessment
| 1 |
why do i feel a sudden swarm of emotions and weird feelings
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i sometimes feel a random swarm of emotions and feelings like i start shaking uncontrolably and get some specific tics in my arms, fingers, head, and chest. i also just start laughing randomly while i have this "attacks?" + some feeling of sudden dread wich makes me have the flight or fight response wich sometimes just makes me wanna punch shit or make me wanna hide? in tight places like the bathroom or my closet.
​
im really confused ive been feeling this for some years and therapy isnt an option for me as i live in a country that is either pay a shit ton for mediocre service or go into free healthcare that is just as crappy or worse than the paid one.
i can kinda control it but it would be of great help if some 1 could even hint at what the fuck do i have and how could i help myself.
​
edit: added some more information. btw srr if my words dont come clear or are confusing also any bad grammar english is not my first language
| 1 |
Sticking it out tips and tricks
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Hi all,
I am in a bit of a transition phase in my life. I recently turned 30 and achieved many of my financial goals (i.e., having enough money to pay off my student loans, emergency fund is fully funded, savings for a down payment, etc.). I was motivated in my 20s to find a lucrative career to meet these goals, which I did, but now that I'm at the finish line I am taking a look around and realizing how unhappy I am.
I feel very unsatisfied at work- it's a small company with a typical corporate environment. I worked with my boss at a previous job, and feel that I "owe" her for giving me this job, especially since it came up a big pay bump. I am trying to stick it out until next year, when I hit the 2year mark at this company and the project I am currently in start up for will be winding down. However, I feel this company in particular has a toxic environment, and my relationship with my boss has continued to suffer. Due to pressures she feels from the higher ups, she has taken to micromanagement tendencies and critiques 90% of everything I do (projects, emails, meeting correspondences, etc). In turn, I now suffer from a lack of self confidence- I feel like nothing I do will be up to par, and I hate myself for that since my boss did me a favor by hiring me.
I have had a conversation with her about my self confidence issues, and I am really trying to work on it. I also have a natural self deprecating sense of humor, and it feels like she jumps on every opportunity to highlight my self confidence issues, even when that it's about something I'm not actually struggling with. I feel like I'm under a microscope, and I'm floundering. She thinks I'm soft/sensitive/not cut out for this. I am one of those people whose natural tendency is to cry when dealing with confrontations which makes everything 10000x worse (especially since my boss is the type to get defensive and nasty when she is in conflict).
I know what my "big" next steps are- I need to find another job without this baggage and toxicity. I am now starting to research other options that are more in line with what I'm interested in / want to spend my time doing, instead of what will make the most amount of money. But I want to stay employed while I figure that out- I don't want to jump ship without a plan. I'm seeking tips on how to get through this next year, and really any outside opinions on my situation (as I have portrayed it). It's so easy to get lost in your own sauce...
| 1 |
can mental illness just disappear ?
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This is kind of a silly question but to summarize ive been depressed and diagnosed with multiple things throughout my whole life,and just in a really bad place crying everyday the whole day hallucinating delusions cptsd etc..but then i watched a childhood movie,i got crazy motivated from it,had a week or 2 where i was a little low afterwards but nothing like before and now ive been amazing and steady for i wanna say4 whole months?my hallucinations etc just vanished,i haven’t cried,i’ve been taking care of and loving myself and life and just feeling so genuinely happy and in a better place,and by no means am i complaining! but just it freaks me out a little bit how could i go from so bad to the happiest/relaxed ive been in like 8 years?its like if all my bad habits just disappeared and i found my passion etc etc are movies just that powerful?i know i wasn’t but i feel like if i could just switch that easy i was faking to begin with,and normally id be scared about thinking im cured but this time it just,feels genuine?
| 1 |
Trouble adjusting to being alone
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I had just spent the past 6 months seeing someone and spent almost every day of the last 3-4 months with them since they moved right next to me. I had a very close relationship but we are very different people for a lot of reasons which caused things to go bad. I would appreciate any tips on coping with the sudden change of being with someone every day to not at all.
Trigger warning for this part about closer details of the relationship (you can skip this paragraph):
Things compiled on each other and my mental health went from really good to worse and worse because of our differences in how we act. The main thing was they yell and get angry which is okay and understandable because it's an autism trait. I personally just can't deal with that and I feel I need to do more and be better, and just kinda makes me feel terrible. I eventually snapped and yelled at everyone over text and broke off all my relationships and friendships (I have never vocally yelled at anyone but this is pretty much the equivalent). I went completely manic for a few days and was suicidal. After three days I messaged them again, and talking to them made me calm back down but the damage was done and friendships were all ended.
Now I'm just going through the motions of feeling horrible, sad, and just crying at random times despite having cried only twice in the past 6 years or so. I've never spent so much time with one person day after day so now everything just makes me think of them. I'm just really struggling to find out how to go back to normal and deal with it all.
Edit: i don't want empathy from anyone, I was pretty messed up and became the bad guy in this situation. I am always working on how to improve myself and my actions
| 1 |
Is this normal? Hyperawareness.
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I will copy paste a diary entry from a few months ago, because i am questioning whether the events that are occuring to me are, at all, normal.
An insight into my mind.
I am 16.
For anyone wondering, around new years i was still OK. That's when a key person in my life left, and ever since then I've been OK, but now missing a distraction, things haven't been the same, and I've had way too much time to my own thoughts. Although a good thing, the fear has already settled. These are a collection of my thoughts.
LINK TO: https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/4tgqf0/everything_feels_too_real/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=2
20/05/23 - 5 months after new dawn
I've been feeling hyperrealism/hyperawareness more and more often, to the point where i went from feeling it every few weeks, to every few days, to every day, to every few hours, to now feeling it constantly - almost like this state of being has embezzled itself into my heart and soul, my very essence alike.
It's proving difficult finding purpose amidst the chaos that has corrupted the veins of humanity today. For many years to come, we will continue to strive, yet for how much longer will we live? Live as humans were intended to?
I keep getting random, yet now constant surges of "hyperreality", wherein i am made overly aware of my thoughts, the blood circulating at my fingertips and the texture of everything they touch. Every smell amplified, the world unravelling itself before my very eyes, all of it feeling surreal - almost like a fevered dream. I notice what my eyes see, and notice how illegitimate it feels, and despite focusing on the good - i can't help but question.
Is this? The meaning of life?
To live so frivolously, surely it is a curse to the blood aflow in each and every one of us. I can't help but think, what is the point of all of this? Why are we doing all of this? What is the point of humanity? Especially with the flaws it has, why are we here?
Is this? The meaning of life?
Are people really satisfied with the life they are given, or its duration? Am i being overly selfish, unappreciative? Or just scared?
How do the sick deal with being sick? How do the elderly, accept death?
Am i scared of death, or am i just scared of nothing? The nothingess that might follow after death?
Is it ok for me to prefer going to hell than to experience an eternal nothingess?
I understand there's religious beliefs to this, so when i say I'm muslim - i am disappointed for feeling this way. Why not just read the Qur'an?
Because i seek answers to questions you shouldn't even ask.
I've only found 2 other people to share this mindset. 1 of whom, I've been very good friends with for 5 years.
The other, who killed himself.
One of those questions, are, if there is an afterlife - what is the purpose in us living eternally in this afterlife? Humanity will never be satisfied, and the Qur'an confirms with stories of a man in heaven whom kept on asking for more everytime he saw more (very vague summary)
And if God alters our conscience to not feel such, would we even be ourselves?
At that stage, what would the point be, of going to a heaven, or a hell? Who is God, and how is God? Aren't we all just an accident?
How is it possible to believe in the Qur'an, yet utter the bs im uttering today?
Perhaps the words above are the reason why i believe to be so paradoxical, I've got multiple personalities, alter egos, i can grasp multiple perspectives, but I'm never satisfied with them. There's always a "why" or "what if", this entire universe lacks absolute answers. And the people around me, they're - ok with this? I'm considerered a fairly gifted child, but when i open up to anyone about even a fraction of the full thing, i am often shut down, or said to be mentally not ok - (by my own parents.)
My mother is attempting to put me into therapy once again, but i fear that, similarly to the previous attempts, it won't help me at all, because its always generic responses im receiving, or one way answers, that don't answer my questions at all, but rather seek to shut down the negative feelings on hopes that, in doing such, the questions will pause.
Hence, I'm aspiring to become wealthy on my own, (not with inheritance, that's a blood-filled story for another day), to at least spend this 1 life in happiness, and in power to help others. But even then, wouldn't i just be desensitised to the luxury that money could buy?
So i aspire to surround myself with friends, and a loving partner, people that i could spend eternity with.
END OF DIARY ENTRY
Is all of this normal?
| 1 |
I’m mad all the time but can’t make changes that matter
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I’m in a really weird spot. Everything pisses me off. I hate work, bills, shit breaking in the house, the general public, crowds. Etc…. It goes in and on.
I’m also resistant to make the changes I need to in order to fix any of those things. Most of them involve moving, downsizing or sacrificing wish also will piss me off
I have a generally negative mindset and am a big skeptic. I don’t know how to fix this
I’ve done 15 years of therapy including medications and even EMDR with no positive results. Lots of different therapists and psychiatrists. I’m stuck
I don’t know how to feel better.
This first one of you that says “just change your mindset” get a virtual throat punch.
| 1 |
I'm Struggling
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Hi! I'm a student studying at a university, and I have been having a really hard time recently. I would consider my self a positive happy individual that works hard to improve myself everyday I lift everyday to improve my body, practice my religion, study for my future, and try to kind to everyone around me. However, I feel that I am limited by what my genetics gave me, and have been going down a downward spiral path of dark thoughts. I have really bad vision (-8, and -4 astigmatism) on both eyes, have been getting cold sore outbreaks (I don't know how I got them), and getting flare ups for scrotum eczema. With the stress of summer classes and research that I have been doing, I have been really depressed on what to do moving forward. These problems that I have are things that can't really be cured and will most likely affect my life forever. I try my best to stay strong and push forward, but recently it has been extremely difficult. As someone who really wants to believe in God, I always wonder out of all people, why he would have to give me these problems. I know that sounds like I am taking the good things in my life as granted. I am thankful for the opportunities that I have received, but I feel that these things happened because of my own effort. As someone who tries his best in life, and tries his best to be kind to everyone, and just wants to live a normal life. It has really been making me doubt my own religion and draining me everyday. I just wanted some thoughts on this.
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Other than that, I hope everyone here finds happiness and conquers their problems! Have a good day!
| 1 |
LSD for depression: How long do I need to discontinue SSRIs in order for the LSD to work?
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Prozac 60mg for over a year, 100ug of LSD planned dose
| 1 |
What is this feeling? (Is this what panic is, or is it something slightly different?)
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I get this feeling that I can only describe as not feeling safe. It's a feeling, so intellectually, I know there's no specific, immediate danger. It's just the *feeling* that sucks. Because it makes it hard to function when it's bad. Again, I'm not actually afraid of something when I get it. So if i mention having that bad/trapped/panic/awful feeling, people will ask what I'm worrying about, and yeah, I can name like 100 things that are weighing on me, but none are the cause. It's also not generalized anxiety I don't think, because circumstances don't affect it.
You know how when you feel "settled," like the opposite of when say you're not home and you're in a foreign place and maybe you feel panicked that you need to be back at your "safe place" or "base" in order to ground yourself and reconnect with what makes you get through the day knowing things will be okay? It's kind of a felt sense, like you can sit on a couch on your phone and actually be present texting your friends, or be present for a moment watching something or hanging around people you love?
This is the inability to feel that (to feel grounded/settled/okay). But it's not an active "attack" of hyperventilating panic or an immediate sense of doom…it's more like, this pit feeling that comes on, pretty suddenly but then stays rather than peaks and ends.
I do have PTSD and sometimes I think it's related to how I felt during the trauma (trapped, like it was never going to end/I had no escape, but at the same time, the abuse wasn't every second, so during that month or two months at a time of feeling trapped, I didn't have a severe peak often, it was more…no sense of base safety). I wasn't really afraid for my life often, but I also had no sense of future. In a way it was just staying in "freeze" with feelings of wanting "flight" or "fight" creeping in when they could.
Anyway, it's been 15+ years and I still get this awful feeling. In its most basic sense it's just, not feeling safe. Even if there's no danger. And that's what drives me crazy, is all the talk therapy and changing my thoughts in the world doesn't help the feeling, and it's the feeling that makes me want to cry or escape being me.
Edit: Oh and physically, it is a fluttery feeling in my chest. Please help.
| 1 |
Is this passive or active ideation?[TW]
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When a person constantly thinks about ending it all and the specifics of how it could happen, is that active or passive? I don’t mean actually making a solid plan, but just how it **could** happen if they were to do it. Is it only active ideation when there are actual plans being made about the time and place? And how common is it that a person constantly switches between active and passive most of the day for months over a period of months?
| 1 |
Struggling With my thoughts
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I don't really understand whats wrong with me. I feel like I have no control over my thoughts or my mind. I deal with thoughts that I don't want pretty much all day long. There isn't a second that goes by where I don't have thoughts I don't like. and I can never make my mind quiet down. They constantly pop up into my head whether I like it or not. At this point it almost feels like it's involuntary. They are mainly moments in my life that I feel embarrassed by or had negative interactions with others.
When I was younger, I used to be able to move on and let them go, now I cannot. I would eventually stop thinking about it at all completely during that time. Now that am older, I have to constantly flash it in my mind and I even hear the same sounds associated with them even though I am not thinking of them visually. I'll pretty much feel guilty and uncomfortable about it even though it happened years ago. It's like my mind feeds off of it and wants to constantly flash and remind me of it. I don't understand whats wrong with me and why I cannot control myself anymore like i used to.
I don't understand what triggered it honestly. Its like all of a sudden my brain just pulled out every single negative memory that I had even though I had not thought of them for years and frankly had forgotten about. My brain just started digging for negative memories regardless of how long ago it happened and had moved on from them. Its hard because it always makes me feel tense and uncomfortable, pretty much all day long and I don't get a break. My thoughts pretty much control and consume me at this point. I feel constantly embarrased of my self even when im alone. I have to find something to distract myself.
I don't understand what's wrong with me and I wish it would go away.
| 1 |
Did anyone experience this and know if it’s reversible?
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Hello so I used to have depression and anxiety.
I resolved depression and changed the way I view some things but the anxiety remained.
So long story short when I was depressed I used to think about suicide 24/7 and it affected my brain in that I can’t organize information anymore or fully grasp the world around me.
But the anxiety about something remained i don’t want to say what it is but when I got anxious about it I overthinked and felt like my brain would have some sort of thing move on it like electricity idk how to describe it. I would then have difficulty thinking and organizing thoughts in my brain with bad memory and forget about what I was thinking in a moment notice.
I resolved it as well because I knew what I was thinking was wrong like I had reason to know and evidence to know that it was I just couldn’t get rid of it.
Anyway it a lot less now that I get anxious about something but the damage remains and it’s not getting better. Iam having hard time thinking with words in my head and now am getting an onset of mathematical thinking problems. To be clear I still am able the talk the words come out on themselves i just can’t think clearly with words and might have hard time translating things and writing. While math I feel like am not good at doing equations or understanding numbers sort of. Did anyone experience this iam afraid cause iam entering college in a few a months and things just keep getting worse. I fear I might get Alzheimer’s early cause of all this with the difficulty of organizing thoughts and grasping things.
| 1 |
What are some alternatives to medication that have a marked and scientifically proven effect on mental health?
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I am possibly starting a mental health business with a partner of mine. We are looking to round out the offering off of the usual medication and therapy first. Im looking into TMS as a treatment offering. What has helped you in your journey? Working out? hiking? Hobbies?
| 1 |
I ended a friendship with a friend who got too clingy. Turns out he developed Dependent Personality Disorder. How do I proceed to give him another chance while still protecting myself?
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I will try to keep this story short. Me and my friend (both M and in 20s) were new graduate students in a foreign country. We are away from everyone we know, but we thankfully have a community here of the same nationality- older grad students.
My friend and I got along very well. He is very upbeat and bubbly. Our personalities matched. We spent a lot of time together. In social situations, I get to stay quiet beside him where he does the talking and I get to butt in or jump in when I have something to say. I was so comfortable with him that even though I was the introverted one, I called him in the mornings to have breakfast together, and tell him to drop by my apartment before he goes home (I live near the campus). We rant about academics, talk about stupid stuff and banter a lot.
We were so close infact that we spent Christmas together. I really cared for him.
However, when things got stressful for us later in the semester, he started being too clingy. Almost like he couldnt function without me around. Things came to a head when his professor gave him a stern lecture. He was very emotional and wanted to spend the night at my place, but I couldnt accommodate him because I had a family call about a serious matter that night.
After that, I decided that I needed space from him and told him this. He did not take this well. He made grand gestures to apologize for what he did, I would forgive him, but then it would happen again. I realize that im pretty avoidant so it does not help. This goes on for a few months, until I couldnt take it anymore and I ended the friendship. He relented and let me go. He also mentioned that he started seeing a psychiatrist.
Fast forward a couple of months, we barely talked. Just small smiles in the hallways, and having a few drinks with common friends but little to no interaction. I miss him as a friend as we really were good friends. He started exercising a lot, and he made an active effort to be friends with others too.
I then get a letter from him. In it, he apologizes, mentions his regrets and how he wouldve acted differently, then explains what happened to him. He developed DPD due to a stressful situation combined with a major life change. He explains that his psychiatrist has helped him a lot, and he is doing his best to be healthier. He then says that he misses me and would love to be friends again. He said that its up to me and he would respect my decision.
Im inclined to give this friendship another try but how do I protect myself? And him for that matter. I dont have experience with dealing with someone who has a mental illness.
| 13 |
Almost got sent to a mental hospital for dark thoughts
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Had an emergency session with my therapist I’ve been seeing for 2 years. Had a meltdown and talked too much, which Led to my therapist forcing me to get evaluated because he felt I was danger to myself. I tried to tell him I didn’t need to go I just wanted to get some things off my chest before I exploded on the wrong person. He explained to me that I’ve been getting worse and this is the next step. It was either I go voluntarily or involuntarily. I went with my parents and my mom talked to the therapist as well to tell him that the hospital he was sending will make me feel worse and only overly medicate me. He claims I was only getting evaluated and nothing more, but I knew they would try to make me stay at least week. After getting asked questions, they put me in an area that was small and only the workers with key cards could get in and out. I had to change into a gown and give up all my stuff. It was 4 rooms, all were occupied with at least 1-2 people in there. I stayed in the small hallway and sat on the bench, until I was reevaluated. I wasn’t in the real hospital yet, I was on another side where they keep the ones they plan on sending there. Yet, all I could think of was going home and wish I just kept my mouth shut. After sitting and talking with the person who was evaluating me, she decided I was stable enough to go home and I had to wait for a good 2 hours for them to discharge. I believed my parents was able to reason with my therapist enough for him to not make the doctors think I need to stay. Wasn’t the worse experience out there, but definitely gave me a bit scare and less talkative. Still debating if I should keep going therapy at all or find a new therapist that I’m more compatible with. It’s more to the story but this all in all.
| 1 |
Someone tell me a reason to live
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Save me….
| 1 |
I’m worried what will happen if something happens to my cat.
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So I’ve (26m) dealing with some pretty serious depression for the last few years and back in 2021 my therapist said I should get a emotional support cat. I got a grey tabby named Callie. She was at a shelter and I love her so much. Recently Callie’s been throwing up a lot. I called out of work and am going to take her to the vet today. I’m worried cause she’s all I have. She literally saved my life when I get her and I don’t know what I’m gonna do if I loose her.
| 2 |
nonverbal autistic struggling with recent trauma and extreme panic
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possible TW: mentions of sewerslide and guns.
idk how to start. i’m MK (21F). recently (maybe a month, hard for me to be present and actually keep track of time) my patient recently shot himself in his home and i discovered his body. i won’t get too into the gore i discovered but it was truly a terrible sight to behold. ever since i’ve been struggling with extreme anxiety and panic. severe panic attacks i haven’t had since i was an undiagnosed kid. heart attack, fear of dying, can’t breathe, brain doesn’t work, etc. not to mention i’ve been struggling with talking to anyone besides my boyfriend (20M).
even with him my words and sentences are short and hardly comprehensible. i have so much anxiety i feel like i’m going to have a heart attack even when i’m not panicked, simply from my heart going absolutely ham for so many weeks straight. i feel terrible because i keep not being able to go to work from my anxiety and nonverbalness, i feel like shit for abandoning my patients half the time and this only fuels my never ending cycle of anxiety to panic to sleep to waking back up with anxiety. i would like to stress that i do not want to die, i just want to be normal, or never have been born like this in the first place. i know it was traumatic but i’ve seen lots of horrible things in my line of work. i don’t have health insurance and i live in the US so if you guys have any advice on how to help with my anxiety or at the very least help me get back to talking again. much love to all, me.
| 1 |
Natural remedies to elevate mood or relieve stress
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So my husband is always so anxious he gets worked up extremely easy and dwells on things he possibly seems he can be borderline depressed the littlest things tick him off and his whole day and mood is ruined he’s rarely ever in a good mood throughout the whole day he is taking St. John’s wart and seems to be helping slightly from overthinking but my question is is there any natural remedies that have worked for u to help relieve stress levels or to increase mood he doesn’t want to get on depression pills but he just wants to help regulate his mood he also smokes weed and has so since he was younger so I believe plays a part in him not understanding how to control his emotions unless he smokes
| 1 |
I can't afford my medication
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Title pretty much says it all. I (23 f) was diagnosed with adhd about a month ago and got a patient assistance card for vvyanse but it only covered the first month. It's now 120 dollars a month and I can't afford it, I don't want to ask my family for help because I already feel like a huge burden (I have chronic pain and illness along with other mental health conditions). It really sucks because the medication was actually helping me. I live on my own and I literally just can't afford it because of the cost of living right now. I don't know what to do, because of all of my other issues and stress I'm having lots of thoughts of unaliving myself and I haven't felt happy in weeks.
| 1 |
I’m struggling in every aspect of life and I need advice
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Hi. I (F20) am in college and it’s draining me. I have OCD, depression, anxiety, ptsd, cptsd, adhd, and bipolar. Among other stressors in my life, me being in school is worsening my suicidal thoughts.
I am in community college after attending university for two separate semesters. In between each of these semesters I was admitted into an inpatient facility. I think school is not for me but I can’t get the job I want without experience. I am extreme about grades now since I need a’s and b’s to transfer to my dream university. It’s in my town and I’m not going out of town to a university it just won’t work for my lifestyle.
I am so stressed about this that I got a 94% on a math test and cried about it. I used to be happy with C’s in math but it’s so much. I’m so bad at math that I think I have a learning disability pertaining to it. Long story short I was putting off a project because of stress, and now it’s due tomorrow and no one knows how to do it. My boyfriend who graduated everything early doesn’t even know how to. It was so stressful that my brain would rather me commit then deal with this. I don’t want to but the anxiety was so high that I got 3 hours of sleep.
I have so much I’m going through and I wish I didn’t add the cherry on top by waiting. I just thought I would pull through as normal. I can submit it late for up to 75% but I really don’t want that.
I’m too hard on myself and I think I always take on more than I can handle. How should I continue from here?
| 1 |
I'm just tired.
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Partner broke up with me. This is my second break up in a span of just a few months. I'm so tired. He said he would always love :((
| 5 |
Easiest and fastest way to get help?
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Short version of the story, my alcoholic and addict partner (and father of child) suddenly abandoned us. I am really struggling to cope. He cheated, and is staying with the person he cheated with while ignoring all of my questions regarding daughter. I feel pathetic, like a joke, and just really fucking sad.
I've been ignoring my depression and rage and anxiety issues for about 2 years while trying to deal with his issues and the lies and now they're all staring me in the face.
I couldn't stop having panic attacks and bawling while alone with my toddler all last night, and I keep thinking that I could just disappear or end things if only I didn't have her... This scares me, I absolutely adore my daughter. It's just hard knowing I gave her this shitty life, after having been raised by a terrible dad myself.
I don't currently have a primary care doctor. I can't check myself into a hospital because I have to work and watch my daughter. I just don't know what to do, but I absolutely can not function right now. I keep thinking this is all just a joke and can't possibly be my life. I think I need help.
| 1 |
When will I become happy?
|
I can't sleep anymore, it's nearly 7 am and I don't know what to do, I want to get help and get better, but I don't want to disturb my family, we're already going through some stuff and I don't want to bother them with my shit, I'd rather not have them spend a single dime on me, I'd like to get a job some day but I can't even act like a normal person anymore, who would want to be with me? Some people say I'm a beautiful person but they don't know me, I have nothing and I'm nothing, I don't make sense and I feel stupid every day, chances are that I am
| 2 |
I don’t think anyone cares, but I am going to do a reset
|
18, female, I just graduated high school, felt myself falling back to bad habits and depression.
I am doing a phone detox, I am also doing a juices detox. I’ll get up at five to have a quick ice shower, go for a run, then a wash shower, I’ll go for a long walk in nature, I’ll read, write, stretch, tan, do skincare, draw, clean my room, help parents do the dishes, cook. I’ll go to bed at eight, so I’ll sleep nine hours.
I am very excited to do this, I’ve done this before and it worked so well, I felt very rested and confident. I am starting tomorrow, wish me luck!
| 102 |
I'm circumcised, and I feel like my penis is deformed...
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Growing up I never really cared about being circumcised, it was my parent's decision and I didn't have a choice, so I didn't think about it. But recently after discovering the consequences of being circumcised, it's taken a toll on my mental health. After reading several comments on multiple subreddits saying how "unnecessary" circumcision is, I've doom-scrolling and finding more and more things to be upset about.
Multiple people have described a circumcised penis as "mutilated," and the idea that my penis was "mutilated" as a result of being circumcised is enough to ruin my self-worth. And upon learning about all the medical shit retaining to what's lost when removing the foreskin, it was enough to make me feel mutilated...
I've managed to get around the disadvantages that come with being circumcised by getting a pocket pussy and some lube, but it doesn't help that my insecurity about my circumcised penis still remains. There are times when I look at porn and notice the dicks are uncut it makes me feel insecure and ugly that my penis doesn't look like there's.
Before you mention it in the comments, I've already visited subs like r/CircumcisionGrief and r/foreskin_restoration. Foreskin restoration seems more up my alley at the moment, becasue all of the post on Circumcision Grief are really sad and downright pathetic at times.
I'm hoping I can get over this with time or at least find some positives in my situation. Until then, I'm either gonna remained circumcised and find work-arounds, or I'll pursue foreskin restoration. But at times it doesn't seem like it's worth it since I won't getting all of the functions of my foreskin back, but oh well....
| 7 |
20 y/o in EXTREME mental duress, please help
|
Please help, in extreme mental duress, possibly a physical illness (long)
I hope someone here more intelligent than me can help. I know this is off topic, but I am suffering madly. I really am not trying to throw a pity party. I just need practical advice from people smarter than me. Or people who have lived a similar experience. I'm posting here because I crave intelligent people's opinions.
So, fair warning, this is going to be really fucking long probably. Will include a (probably still somewhat legnthy) TLDR at bottom.
Christ, where to begin? I guess I'll get some basics out of the way. I'm 20 years old. I do suffer some mental health conditions. I have been diagnosed with OCD, GAD, social anxiety & depression. I also strongly believe I have ADHD.
Basically, I have been suffering pretty extreme mental duress. It feels like I have early onset dementia or something. And it is extremely troubling. I often have casual suicidal thoughts about blowing my head to a trillion pieces. I have never made a plan or acted on these thoughts though.
I have always been intelligent. I am most definitely above average at minimum. When I was in 4th grade a computer graded reading assessment placed me at college freshmen level overall. I never studied and always aced everything. I even begun to purposely fail tests to fit in at one point. Teachers, when unsure of a subject would bounce ideas or questions off of me. In 4th grade. Seriously.
The reason I mention intelligence is because I feel like I have possibly ensared myself in a web of my own thoughts. I can't stop thinking. I often suffer tension headaches and migraines. I think about things in a very dissociative, incredibly complex manner.
It feels like my conclusions of reality are constantly folding in on themselves & contradicting. My awareness and ideas are always hitting new and more confusing levels of meta awareness. Nothing makes sense anymore. I have lost my grasp on what is true or real. Not in a psychotic way though.
I have had an extremely rough time becoming an adult. I have basically failed completely. The longest I have ever worked without quitting is 2-3 months. My self care is awful.
I often suffer bad hypochondriasis. This extreme brain fog makes me worry I have lead poisoning, thallium poisoning, Neuro syphilis, etc. I also suffer chronic fatigue, no matter how much I sleep. All it takes is for me to read or think about an ailment, and it seems I have a bunch of symptoms that match and overlap one another.
Because of all of this extreme distress and confusion I have struggled with substance use. I am in love with downers. I have stolen large quantities of medication from my mom over & over again. And been kicked out more times than I can count. I recently left rehab and came back home.
I was hooked on benzos at 18 years old.
The most destructive vice by far was weed. I became addicted to smoking it all day long, even though it would give me panic attacks. I lived a few lonely years in an intense, near constant state of panic. I feel like I put my nervous system on the metaphorical electric chair. And I am a charred shell of a human being now.
Nothing in this life feels like it comes easy to me. Everything from the trivial to the important absolutely riddles me with anxiety. Going to the grocery store is a white knuckling experience. My mind sees things in constant strings of patterns and conditionals, which often mesh together and form dichotomies at the same time. It is absolutely fucking exhausting in my brain.
Therefore, I live in a constant, horrific state of confusion. I often get extreme bouts of rage inside. But like everything else, I shove it back down. I am suffering so badly. The worst part is I struggle immensely to articulate how I really feel or think most of the time. It is honestly a terrifyingly lonely experience. I am crushed to my core.
There was a philosopher, I forget who, who dubbed this state "going schizophrenic." Leaving yourself absolutely open to any and everything, leaves you in the most extreme state of confusion.
I often worry that maybe this isn't psychological. What if there is something deeply fucking wrong with me? Thoughts like these are the ones that lead me to the "blow my head to a trillion pieces" thoughts.
I still have a lot of hope and positivity in me. But I am festering. I don't know how much longer I can take this before I implode or die from a heart attack or something. Feeling this way for years can't be healthy. I seriously don't know what is wrong with me. I am honestly scared.
I know I need professional help probably. I have gone to numerous therapists. Seen psychiatrists. None of it really does much for me. Benzos, alcohol, opiates, and dissociatives are the only things that offer me refuge. I often have thoughts of doing DMT or high dose mushrooms in hopes of fixing myself. Kind of a "hail Mary." But I know this is a horrible idea. Especially ay my age and current mental health, a bad trip might send me into psychosis or schizophrenia.
Well, there it is. I still feel like I'm leaving so much out. I feel like I have barely even began to put all this into words. I hope you smart people can help me, because I can't help mysely evidently.
TLDR: intelligent person has ensared himself within his own mind. I fear that maybe this isn't psychological and it's medical. I have extreme brain fog & bad short & long term memory. I am suffering badly.
| 1 |
I wish I could die
|
I’ve had a series of bad things happen. I hate that because of therapy I am self aware and I know that everything that is happening is due to my own actions. Knowing why all of this is happening to me just makes me feel worse. Why couldnt I be a better person? I couldn’t I have made better decisions? I am 29 with no skills, no real career, no money, no significant other. If it wasn’t for my family I would kill myself. Sometime I just wish that god would just take me so I could leave guilt free. I’ve been trying to find god and build a relationship with him but I swear I don’t think he is even listening. I feel so helpless.
| 0 |
I'm not allowed to feel anything at work
|
I can't even vent my anger by working harder/faster than normal because I look angry!? HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EFFECT ANYONE AT ALL!? IM NOT ACTIVELY COMPLAINING AT ALL, THEY ASK WHY I LOOK ANGRY, SO I TELL THEM, AND THEY GO STRAIGHT TO THE GM OVER IT!? Well, now I'm just not going to talk to any of them. I mean, why should I? They clearly don't give two shits about me, why should I care about them? Fuck them. Fuck everyone and everything. I don't need friends. I don't need people. I need a way out of this God forsaken hellhole. But please, tell me how I shouldn't be allowed to express anything at any time and should just accept the shit life I've been given and force myself to just "be happy." Or just don't respond at all. Because none of you actually care. You just like to think you do.
| 1 |
i only started really thinking about the possibility of having ADHD after starting an office job.
|
I can’t do anything, i slack off a lot, i can’t maintain my focus for more than two minutes, and my performance is for sure affected.
It’s frustrating and i can’t breathe sometimes because the task i have seems too overwhelming. and what maybe needs an hour to complete takes me the whole day.
I wasn’t like this in school or university. I finished my masters late last year and got a really good score too, so it didn’t affect my studies.
It’s just at work, i can’t do anything, it might be my diagnosed depression which has gotten worse, or the fact that i really don’t enjoy what i do (i enjoyed university a lot more), but might it be ADHD? is it even worth to consider that given the symptoms didn’t start in my childhood?
I’m not looking for a diagnosis online just a point of view.
| 1 |
Boredom...
|
Every day is the same. Wake up, do nothing, head back. You think being productive would help me, like cleaning the house, doing the dishes, organizing my room, but no. I don't look up to anything because there's nothing to look up to. I just want it to stop. Why am I here. I didn't ask for it.
Teen life fr.
| 1 |
I think I'm going insane, and I need some advice or anything
|
I keep feeling this weird energy/spirit-like pressure on my back. It's not inside my back but more overtop. Even when I lay down, put something on my back, walk, and run I keep feeling it there and it's so damn uncomfortable. I'm afraid I'm going insane cuz I feel it could be a spirit attachment but that sounds insane and now I'm afraid I might go into psychosis, and I keep overthinking and leaping to assumptions.
About a year or two ago I had hallucination-like things. They were very minor and mostly trick or corner-of-the-eye stuff or were very vague and just weird to me, I knew they were not real or was very skeptical of them. I now just have mostly phantosmia (I believe that's what it is called) and only recently (like 2-3 days ago) for a couple of minutes I felt the presence of a little boy in my room near my door and it went away quickly, so I wasn't too freaked out by it, though it was a bit odd and out-of-place and creeped me out. But now this weird feeling on my back is scaring me cuz it's almost been an hour since I've felt it there and no hallucination has lasted this long, whether it is one or not, I'm open to either side.
Give me advice in any area idk really care. I just am kinda worried and it's making me uncomfortable and it's all I've been thinking about.
| 4 |
Can traumatic events end anxiety?
|
So about 2 years ago in Christmas my family and I were in a hijacking in Mexico they took us out threw us on the ground and drove away with our car stranding us in Mexico at night on the highway eventually we made it back. We were separated cause my brothers and I had passports my parents didn’t we barely made it on the plane I had Covid but luckily they didn’t check the Covid test. I skipped out on a lot of details but I’m just trying to figure out that this event which gave me some pretty vivid and graphic dreams ended up stopping my anxiety? I had pretty bad panic attacks once every other month but now it’s more like once every year if I’m under extreme conditions like working back to back 80 hour weeks. And even then it usually doesn’t happen.
| 0 |
Morning panic attacks
|
So my work is like an emergency therapy number that I called cuz I was having a panic attack and I just needed someone to talk to. They also do a little like long-term counseling which I'm signed up for and so when I called they're like well can't you just wait for your counseling appointment later this week? No I'm having a panic attack now I wanted to talk to someone now so I could deal with my problems now and maybe get out of bed and go to f****** work for the first time in a while and get back to living my life. My mom died like a year and a half ago and she was my last parent I don't really have any other family no siblings good friends but they're just friends and I know they care about me but I don't have any family anymore and it hurts and I'm just looking for a reason to get out of bed and I don't know what it is anymore
| 1 |
I just got a 300 score in Testosterone test
|
Hi all,
So I just got a low testosterone with low hTSH. I am having hard time to erect my penis during masturbation for the last 4-5 days with no full erection what so ever. I have insomnia and slept 6 hours past 3 days. Also have anxiety over some issues.
Where am I going?
| 0 |
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