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Good night, sweet Principal.
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Oh, Springfield Elementary! I will have you back again! After all, tomorrow is another school day!
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And then when I got out of the service, well, the next few years are a blur.
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Patty. Where's Skinner?
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We decided we loved each other enough never to see each other again!
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I hope I can find a man like that. Patty, are you throwing away your last chance at happiness just for me?
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Thanks.
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Now let's get some pancakes.
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Listen Barney, I... Eh.
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She broke my heart, Moe.
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Don't worry, Barney. Time heals all wounds.
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Well, what do you know. You're right! And look, a whole pitcher to myself.
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I told you you'd be back!
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Well then, let's move on to new business. Have you taken care of McBain?
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You don't have to worry, Senator Mendoza. By now our "dear friend" McBain has met with a - shall we say - unfortunate accident.
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Excellent. With McBain out of the way, nothing can stop us!... Any more new business?
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Two-fifty for this?
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What a gyp!
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You certainly broke up that meeting.
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Oh, McBain.
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THE RULES THAT CONSTRAIN OTHER MEN / MEAN NOTHING TO MCBAIN...,the rules that constrain other men mean nothing to mcbain,10
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8153,28,14,Jasper Beardly: Booo.,123000,true,273,332,Jasper Beardly,Aztec Theater,Booo.,booo,1
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8154,28,15,Gulliver Dark: THE PUNCHES THAT BRING PAIN TO OTHER MEN/
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I want to see the manager!
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The screen was too small.
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The floor was sticky.
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The romantic subplot felt tacked on.
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In short, we demand a refund!
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Sorry, it's against our policy.
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I'll policy you, you--
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Hey, don't have a heart attack, old dude.
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Don't you... tell... me... what to do... you... young... whipper... snap-per.
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... And thank you most of all for nuclear power, which is yet to cause a single proven fatality, at least in this country. Amen.
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Very nicely said, Homer.
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Dad, Bart ate a green bean during the blessing.
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How do you know unless you opened your eyes during the blessing?
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Eating is worse than opening eyes.
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Is not.
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Is too.
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Is not.
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Is too.
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Is not.
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Is too.
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Quiet, you kids! If I hear one more word, Bart doesn't get to watch cartoons and Lisa doesn't get to go to college.
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Da-ad!...
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Not one word.
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I thought I said knock it off!
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We didn't say anything.
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Not one word.
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Well, no panta-ma-mime, either.
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Telephone, Homer.
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It's the hospital.
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The hospital? Y'ello... Oh my God!
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Homer, I'm happy to say that your father only had a mild arrhythmia.
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Mild?! There wasn't anything mild about it! Now get back to the pharmacy, you quack.
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Oh, with that feisty attitude, you'll bury us all, Grampa Simpson.
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Pull your chair closer, my son.
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What is it, Da --
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P.U.! Not that close! Ish. Homer, that heart attack made me realize that I'm going to die someday.
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Oh Dad, you and your imagination.
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There's something I think you should know. Homer, you have a half-brother.
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A half-brother?
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Huh uh. It all happened while I was courting your mother...
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I was checking out the skirts at the local carnival when I first saw her...
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Hey, Handsome, want to dunk the clown?
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She did things your mother would never do. Like have sex for money.
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A year later, the carnival came back to town and she had a little surprise for me.
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We left the baby at the Shelbyville orphanage, and I never saw him again. A year later, I married your mother and we had you.
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Abe, I want Homer to grow up respecting his father. He must never know about that, that... carnival incident.
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Promise you won't tell him.
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Whoops! Forget what I just told you.
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What are you blubbering about?
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This makes me feel special, Dad. Since I'm the one you kept, that must mean you really love me.
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Hmmm... Interesting theory.
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I'm going to find my brother. I don't care what it takes. If I have to move heaven and earth, I'm going to find him!
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Yeah, right. Good luck.
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A long-lost half-brother. How Dickensian!
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So, any idea where this bastard lives?
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Well his parents aren't married, are they? It's the correct word, isn't it?
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I guess he's got us there.
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BASTARD, BASTARD / BASTARD, BASTARD / BASTARD, BASTARD
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BASTARD / BASTARD, BASTARD!
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Twen... forty-eight. This is it.
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Excuse me, is this an orphanage?
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Ooo, you're a little late, pal. They tore down the orphanage thirty odd years ago.
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Thirty years! I'll never find him. I'm doomed to walk through this life alone. Oh brother, where art thou?!
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Take it easy, buddy. They moved across the street.
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Oh. Hee, hee. Sorry.
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I know how you feel, Mr. Simpson.
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I myself have spent years searching for my long-lost twin brother --
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Yeah, yeah, yeah, well, I wish I could help you but we're looking for my brother today. Can you tell me his name?
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Hmmm, according to our records, a Mr. and Mrs. Powell adopted your brother and named him Herbert.
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Herbert. Herbert Powell. Great! Where can I find him?
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I'm sorry, I'm not allowed to release that information.
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Oh please, please, this is my life we're talking about here. Please...
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Well, I do sympathize with your situation, Mr. Simpson. After all, your brother could be anywhere. Even Detroit.
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I know, he could be anywhere! That's why I want you to narrow it down! Please...
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You know Mr. Simpson, if you ask me, the City of Brotherly Love isn't Philadelphia... it's Detroit.
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Well, if you ask me, changing the subject makes you the most worthless, heartless, excuse for a human being I ever...
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Read between the lines, you fool.
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