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t3_kn9u6 | AskReddit | My roommate and I just discovered we have a mouse problem and are in desperate need of some advice. | So as of a few days ago my roommate and I put 2 and 2 together and realized that the "crumbs" and "spills" on the counter and floor of our apartment kitchen might not be what they appear. My roommate informed me that she had been cleaning up new crumbs in our stove's drip pans every morning thinking that I was just a slob. When we pulled the oven forward we saw hundreds of little mouse droppings along with a hole in the wall that was obviously their way into the apartment. Obviously this startled us so we went out and bought a single "humane" trap just to see if we could catch anything. Within 15 minutes we heard what sounded like multiple mice scratching and squeeking to get into the trap but we weren't able to catch anything.
We have since contacted our leasing office and informed them of the situation, and they provided us with a new oven, set out a few traps, and have an exterminator scheduled to come out friday. They have let us know that once the exterminator takes care of the problem they will patch up the hole in the wall no problem.
Now the office has been very kind in helping us solve this problem ASAP but I just have to ask: what else are we entitled to as far as fixing this mess. We found droppings in and around our food, dishes, and even in the laundry room. Are we able to ask for compensation for the food we have to replace? And are we able to ask for a cleaning crew to come out and clean our kitchen, laundry room, and even our carpet? I mean obviously mice feces aren't that healthy for you and when ever my roommate and I are home our allergies start acting up (which could be the mice, or just dust from the home). | We have mice in our apartment and need to know what the leasing office can do to help us make our apartment livable again after the mice are gone. |
t3_1ixkka | loseit | Day 7 - First time in the Gym solo, can't force myself to go | Hello Loseit,
I've seen so many incredible fat losses here, that helped me a lot to get started. To give you an idea, I've tried to lose weight for a while now, but I always end up back to my original weight.
This time I've decided not only to go on a diet, but also start training. I've found this amazing gym (I've tried a lot of them before, never liked it) and I feel this might be it.
Since I don't really know how to train myself, I've hired a personal trainer twice a week for a month. To quote the FAQ, they are "eye-wateringly expensive" but worth it. The issue is I actually need to go three times a week. So today it would be my first solo flight there, after work.
But seriously, I can't force myself to go there. I feel tired, demotivated and I'm terribly angry at myself. I do hope I'll end up going. To be honest, I don't really expect any answer to this post, I just wanted to vent it a bit out. And if someone reads me and is in the same situation, just fucking do it. | not very motivated redditor to go to the gym who vents out a bit on this amazing subreddit. Will end up going to the gym anyway, so do the same. |
t3_2t9o4i | relationships | I [18 M] fell out of love with my SO [18 F] 2 yrs and told her the truth because I promised I would always; what can I do so we may one day be okay? | We were together for two years. No it wasn't that the honeymoon phase ended; that happened a while a go. This was after putting in work, being patient and not leaving due to some general bad feelings. We were sitting together on my bed, and I felt physically ill when she tried to kiss/cuddle me, because I knew then that I didn't love her the same way. I cried, and then told her the truth.
Months ago she had told me that if I ever fell out of love with her, I should just tell her instead of deceiving her. I told her the truth that I never wanted to have to tell BECAUSE I wanted to do right by her, not lie, and have a chance someday of having her in my life, because I still do and will always love her (just not in love with her). What can I do to try to make her understand, since right now she calls me a liar and says I never loved her? | Fell out of love with SO of 2 yrs, told her the truth- what can I do to make her see I did it out of caring so that we can one day be okay? |
t3_2q1thd | tifu | TIFU by tripping $500 | This fu happened today. I was at church for the annual christmas service. Someone I am pretty close with, lets call him jon, is also there taking pictures on a camera he just bought. If you would like to know, it is a Sony alpha 7II. Over $2000. So anyways, im sitting in a row by myself, and here he comes camera in hand. He pats me on the head since im like a litle brother too him. I pat him on the back too awknowledge his presence. And then all of a sudden, he gets caught on something may have been my leg or a stand for a chair but he fell, dropping his $2000 camera. He is ok but the camera isnt. The lens housing his completely f'ed up. Keep in mind that it is a $500 lens. I feel like a pile of dung now. Im 15 so i can't pay him back. He later messaged me saying that he didnt blame me since it was in accident. I still feel horrible for my fk up. He got a discount on a new lens from best buy which he says is better, but i pretty much made him spend a couple hundres tht he didnt have to. Damn. Does anyone have any advice on dealing with this, like sony warranty or whatnot.? Any help is appreciated. | Tripped someone he ended up dropping his camera completely ruining his $500 lens. Had to spend a couple hundred on a new one. |
t3_2emdnx | relationships | My [25/F] long distance partner [31/M] is becoming much more difficult to meet. | I moved to Korea and have been seeing a man here exclusively but not officially for about four or five months. We are long distance (about three hours) but we have been traveling somewhere and spending a weekend together every third week and its been going great. I honestly really like him.
(the reason we are not official is because he plans to go abroad for a year and we agreed itd be too difficult to date like that. However, he asked me to wait for him to come back.)
We both ended up with Saturday jobs starting this weekend. We both signed contracts for them as well. This means we can only see each other for a night because we also have our normal jobs on Mondays.
He says be positive and just make it work but I'm not sure. What do you guys think? Any advice? | I won't be able see my long distance guy very often and I'm worried that it'll be too much for us. |
t3_2vk3lb | personalfinance | Credit card from a company that has a judgment against me | Hi all,
I'm in the process of rebuilding my credit after an unemployment fiasco seven years ago. I've more than gotten back on my feet and have gotten my financial house in order to the point that I'm actually giddy about it as opposed to my previous state of constant fret.
That aside, I'm currently using a terrible credit card to reestablish my history and rebuild what irresponsibility and misfortune destroyed. I want to start moving toward a more sane and user-friendly card option (I pay my balance in full every month, btw) but I have a question about the likelihood of approval. Credit Karma is telling me that I have very good odds of being approved for a Capitol One card that is worlds better than the CreditOne card I'm currently using. The problem is that Capitol One is one of the two credit cards that charged off for me seven years ago, and I currently have a judgment from them on my report. Is it even possible that I can get another card from them while that judgment exists, or do they still think I'm a scumbag? | Can I even kind of expect a credit card company that has a judgment against me to approve me for another card seven years after my original failures? |
t3_14xcu1 | relationships | I [29/m] am returning home from a foreign country, my relationship is naturally dissolving. | Thank you for taking the time to read this.
**Abstract:** I am struggling with a recent turn of events in a relationship - even though I know it would likely come to this anyway.
I am a 29 year old male who has been in a relationship with a 25 year old female for about 8 months. She is a wonderful woman who has been incredibly patient and honest with me for the duration of our time together. I am happy to have met her and value our time together.
The problem lies in the fact that the summer of 2013, I will leave this country and return to my own for an advanced degree. In the early stages of the relationship, she made it clear that she does not have any interest of leaving this country for mine. I support her decision and have tried my best to not hinder her choices to have a career and her own life. (Likewise for her to me.) In the last 3 weeks, her responsibilities at her work have become greater and her successes are showing! Abruptly last week she stopped contacting me. She won't return text messages or calls. She occasionally logs in to Skype at work but doesn't respond. I am worried about her.
My personal dilemma is that the relationship is going to grow difficult for the both of us. It would be unfair of me to "hug with one arm and hit with the other" by asking her to be very close until I leave. I would understand if she contacted me and explained that she wished to be finished with the relationship - or at least I could make myself understand. I do care about her deeply, so it seems so selfish of me to want this to be on my terms. I can't stop missing her and feel that her running away like this is not so good. It is probably reasonable to feel unhappy about this situation. I don't want it to end like this, but maybe I should just let it go.
If you have advice, I would be pleased to read and consider it. | I have [HAD] a relationship that was wonderful, but the girlfriend recently chose to disappear. I will be leaving this country in 7 months as it is, should I just let this go? |
t3_1dw2q8 | relationships | I (20M) am questioning starting a relationship with a hookup friend (20F) | I have been friends with her for about three months. She got out of a relationship with her boyfriend around that time (after we started hanging out) and I saw the worst of her when he broke up with her. He dumped her over Facebook and apparently called her fat a few months back. This prompted her to cheat on him with a co worker a few times before telling him and him dumping her. She claims the relationship was as good as over in the last two months anyway as a justification. They dated for three years so it was a big thing. I started spending time with her and started hooking up a month ago. I'm a nice dude (really, I like to think of myself as not someone who would be a rebound as I'm not super tall or aggressive). It progressed a bit slowly and we just started sleeping together. She has been hinting at being more than friends but I can't get past the fact that she was a cheater, regardless of the circumstances. She seems sweet but that is a huge turn off is it not? | hookup buddy cheated on her last boyfriend with a guy at work because he called her fat to piss her off during an argument. Wants to date me |
t3_3cqbih | relationships | I [27M] made a huge mistake in sleeping with another person in the 2 weeks my gf [25F] were broken up - back together now, but for how long? | My girlfriend of just about 2 years and I have on and off again gotten in to arguments and drunken fights [NOT physical] about various things over about the past year. They always started with something minor, and would escalate because I was insecure and petty about a few things that I now realize were really stupid of me to use to escalate a fight with. That being said, I'm COMPLETELY over those things.
About 2 months ago, we got in to one particularly heated argument that led to us breaking up. Over the course of the next 2 weeks, I ended up being very sad, feeling pathetic and lonely, very drunk, and sleeping with someone else, ONCE. I woke up the next morning instantly in tears, full of regret and pain and disappointment in myself.
There wasn't nearly enough time that had passed for me to sleep with anyone and I wished so much I hadn't done it. We actually had a date set to "talk" in the next week. In my mind, this "talk" was going to be a completely dissolution of our relationship, when in fact it was going to go the complete opposite way (according to her).
The morning I woke up after sleeping with this other person, I probably shouldn't have, but I told my girlfriend everything, I couldn't live with it not being said, not to cause her any pain, which it definitely did, but if there was a chance of us getting back together, I couldn't keep it from her. I truly, truly regret everything about it.
In any case, we got back together on a sort of trial basis, and things are going just okay. I know a certain level of trust is completely gone and can't be fixed, but from the bottom of my heart I completely regret everything about it and wish so much I hadn't done it. Is there any way to prove this to my girlfriend to regain any semblance of trust? I'm pretty sure I've ruined a relationship that was probably going to be the best and last one of my life and I'm having so much trouble reconciling it in my head. | slept with someone else on a 2 week break up from my gf; instant regret and dissappointment in myself; told gf; we're back together, but still trying to work on things. |
t3_mr6el | AskReddit | Reddit, what are your most humility-inducing, cringe-worthy moments of embarrassment? I'll start. | One night, I encountered this Asian guy at the beginning of a party. I'd met him at least three times before, but he was this super douchey hipster type who pretended not to remember who I was every time we met. This time I just gritted my teeth and repeated my name for him once again, subtly mentioning that we'd met before. The night went on, and I got drunker, and when I get drunker, I tend to get more belligerent. I didn't see him the whole night; it was a big party. By the end of the night, I'm fairly wasted and it's very dark, so I'm not in the most observational state. So this douchey Asian hipster comes up to me and tries to introduce himself once more, and the fires of hell flare up behind my eyes. I caustically stare at him and in the most obnoxious voice possible, say "Hey asshole, my name is AbusiveMoo, I've met you like four fucking times already." [Except probably a more slurred, less articulate version of that.] My boyfriend is standing next to me and just mutters, "Uh, that's not Herp..." Suddenly I turn beet red. Not only was I a massive asshole to this poor guy, but I'm a racist asshole who thinks all Asians look alike. Needless to say I apologized profusely, but it embarrasses me just to think about that. | Mistook an Asian dude for another guy that I met a bunch of times, got mad at him for not knowing who I was, felt like a racist asshole. |
t3_450usg | relationships | Me 21F with my roommate/friend 20F of over a year, puts me down as a joke literally every day | I've been living with this girl for a year and a half, but I have a lot of issues with her as a roommate and a friend. One of the friend parts is that she constantly puts me down as a joke. Like, I said the word astute and she said "wow you're a nerd". I realized I made a mistake with communicating with someone via text and when I said "Oh I made a mistake!" she said "You're a loser!". Before when I said, "I think I made a mistake with this" she brushed me off and said "it's fine", she always says its fine or it's not a problem or there's no reason to be worried. I'm almost never really worried about these things, but it really pissed me off to have someone constantly belittled my feelings.
She says stuff like this every day. If I drop something I'm "dumb", yesterday I swore because I poked myself with a knife and she basically scolded me for swearing. Bitch I am an adult I can say fuck if I think I hurt myself! All of it is framed as a joke but it really irritates me. I usually just don't respond but it doesn't make a difference.
Something else is, whenever she does something right or makes a guess and it's right, she'll joke "I'm perfect" or "I'm always right!".
The more I type it the more of a bitch she seems like. A month ago when I found out my ex was dating again and it made me feel sad, she said something like "he just wanted sex". I told her "don't say that" sharply, because why the fuck would I want to hear that?
I don't think she's mean intentionally. I am apparently her closest friend but honestly I don't like her that much. Maybe I'm her only friend because she pushes people away.
I guess I just want advice for how to say something about the joking/putting me down thing. I'm sick of having someone treating me like an imbecile for dropping a sponge or something equally trivial. I'm on mobile so sorry for any issues with the post. | my roommate/friend is rude to me in a joking way every day and I hate it. Best way to make this stop? |
t3_4qgztr | relationships | I [42 M] Have difficulty communicating with my [38F] wife when she enters "Negativity mode" and I'm not sure what to say. | Hello R/Relationships
My wife is a strong, accomplished businesswoman and the love of my life. She's everything I could ever want and a lot of times i'm in awe of how talented she is.
BUT
It doesn't take much some times...a lost form. A misplaced pair of glasses. A note from our landlord that the rent is going up 5$...and she'll devolve into the most negative person i've ever met. Literally anything you mention is thrown away and she dives into this soul sucking negativity that can't be communicated with. Then later it's just all gone and she's back to being her. Whether it's hormonal or there is anything I can actually do I'm not sure of.
What I'd like some suggestions on is what can I say during these bouts of negativity. Attempts at being positive are met with more negativity....Attempts at finding the solution to the task at hand only get replies of more issues that provide cause for being negative. If I say nothing then I'm "Ignoring her"
Most recent example...
Her: I'm an idiot, i'm worthless
Me: That's not true, you've accomplished so much and you'll be able to do this.
Her: I've done nothing.
What is there to say or do when someone periodically becomes irrationally disappointed in themselves? | Sometimes during certain times my wife will get overly negative about literally everything, I'm looking for suggestions for things to say other than "Nothing". |
t3_3u6crh | relationships | Me 25F with my SO 27M of 7 years, his phone secrecy is becoming a real problem for me | Hi r/relationships!
My SO has been extremely secretive about his phone lately (more than usual), and it's making me feel a little crazy and very insecure. When we're sitting on the couch together he turns his phone to a really awkward angle, in what seems to be an attempt to keep me from seeing what's on the screen, even when I'm very clearly not looking. If I ask who he's texting, he says it's none of my business and he deserves privacy. This obviously makes me more suspicious, because I feel like if he must be talking to someone who would upset me if I knew who it was or having an inappropriate conversation (like the old adage "those who have nothing to hide, hide nothing"). Every time I ask he gets more defensive and I feel more insecure each time he refuses to answer - it's a really frustrating cycle. It always ends up with both of us feeling upset - me because he won't just be honest with me and tell me what's going on, and him because he feels his phone is private and he shouldn't have to tell me what he's talking about or who he's talking to. His phone is also always locked, and I noticed he's been putting it on airplane mode more than usual when we're together.
My question is - is this kind of secrecy normal for guys? Am I expecting too much when I ask who he's talking to or what they're talking about? How much privacy do you give your SO when it comes to their phone? | My SO is extremely secretive about his phone and it makes me feel insecure. What do you consider "normal" phone privacy in a relationship? |
t3_4h29m0 | relationships | Me [20 M] with my close friend (kinda?) [21 F] went through some complications and I need advice. | So, to start off, let me tell you the background information:
I've known this girl for the majority of my college career. We were always really close, and even though we are fundamentally different people, we connected very well on a personal basis.
Well, a couple of months ago I started developing feelings for her and of course, I ended up telling her. What she told me was basically that she wasn't ready for any commitment, but she would "like to take it slow and see what happens."
Fast forward to today. I was getting anxious about this entire ordeal because in all honesty, we haven't progressed much since. Besides texting everyday, I hardly saw her, and I did not get any sort of romantic vibe from her. I finally confronted her about it through text and she spilled everything to me. She said that she still hadn't developed any feelings for me, and the part that got to me was she stated that she wasn't sure if she ever will. Is that my signal to forget her and move on? Or should I continue investing my time on her? I still very much like this girl a lot but I am confused on what I should do next. | Started liking my close friend, fast forward a couple of months, after confrontation she told me she hasn't developed feelings for me yet and she "doesn't know if she ever will." What do I do? |
t3_dh6ek | AskReddit | Advice for changing schools.. | Hey guys, I was told to consult AskReddit about this problem I have since most of you offer good advice/opinions. Anyway, here my situation: I went to a state IT college my freshman year as an engineering major and found that I needed a more well rounded university with things to do ect.. (The college was also in a bad area, but about 30-40 minutes from home.) So after my first year, I transferred to a university, and although I'm having a much better time here now, I feel like my new school is lacking with their curriculum.. To top it all off, I can't even get into my own major! Even though I was an engineering student at first, the college of engineering didn't take me. (I did make the Deans list, so it's not like I was doing badly..) So I changed my major to physics so I can hopefully get my math and physics courses out of the way while in the transitional period. I talked to the advisor of my desired major and she's telling me it'll be very tough for me to transfer into this major ("You'll need at least a 3.5 gpa to even be considered") The hell is with this? She was also being quite pessimistic about it as well, which kinda pissed me off. Well, it just seriously seems like my change majors application won't be accepted. Alright, now that you know my situation here is the real question; Should I give up on my desired major and take up a major fairly similar (Lets say Civil Engineering) and maybe get in, or ride out this semester and then transfer back to my old school? | School 1) In a bad area, nothing to do, close to home, pretty good curriculum, I can get into my desired major no questions asked. |
t3_2gmidf | relationships | Me [19 F] with my Boyfriend [22 M] of 5 months, is upset that I won't bend to the idea of moving... | My boyfriend and I have been dating for 5 months and get along quite well. He is the type of person that has no issues picking up and moving, or just moving on in general.
I have always vowed to myself that I would never move for a significient other (people may not like that, but where I live now means a lot to me). I know that if I moved I would have a hole in my heart.
I mentioned it today to him as a passing comment, and he said that it was a serious issue and finished his sentences shortly.
He stated he would pick up and move for me if I asked.
I don't want to leave my family and my home. | Moving from home city will never be an option, boyfriend stated it is a major issue. Am I wrong to not compromise on how I feel about this? |
t3_qtce4 | AskReddit | Reddit, do you have any relatives that stand for ridiculous things/have crazy beliefs? | When I was very young, like many people in my generation, my parents decided to get divorced. Throughout the process my older brother and I stayed at both sets of grandparents' houses. My fathers family (whom we have zero contact with currently) are southern baptist, wealthy, white ranchers. They live in a fitting town in Oklahoma. One visit, I asked to play with the neighbor kids down the street, and they told me I was not allowed to play with those types of children. "Those types of children", my brother later explained to me, were ones grandpa and grandma didn't like just because the color of their skin. He used the term "racist". I was six or seven and didn't understand what that word/concept meant so I continued asking them, and I was punished with a spanking/timeout etc.
My older brother also came over with braids in his hair one time (It was the nineties, perfectly normal and universal hairstyle remember?) and they told him if he didn't remove the "ghetto" braids he would not be allowed to stay in their household.
When I returned to my mom, I told her I was mad because I wanted to play with our neighbors but wasn't allowed to etc. Needless to say, my mom was FURIOUS and refused to let me stay there worried they would teach me similar outrageous things. No contact has been made with those family members. To make things worse, my biological father stood up for them and therefor we also have no relationship now. It's literally baffling to me that I could be related to such unintelligent and careless people. | My biological fraternal grandparents are disgustingly racist, and my father supported them rather than his own children- no relationship with any of those family members exists now. Any other crazy family members like this out there? |
t3_168ke1 | relationships | Getting over a premature mutual breakup with a girl [F-18]. (me)[M-19] | I went out with this girl [18]toward the end of my senior year of high school. We dated and had fun for a couple of months. We really liked each other, but it had to end when her family got stationed in another state (dad military), forcing her to move mid summer. We mutually broke up because a long distance relationship would have never lasted, and would have probably ended badly. It's 6 months later, and we go to college in different states. She is in a relationship right now. My problem is that I still can't stop thinking about her, and I feel like our relationship was ended way too prematurely. I would never contact her while she was in a relationship, but could that ever be an option for me(while both of us are single of course)? If so, what would I say, and If not, how can I get over her? | Went out with a girl. We liked each other a lot. She had to move. I can't stop thinking about her because relationship was ended way too prematurely. What do I do? |
t3_1vsmk3 | relationships | my(17f) first love(18m) is over. what now? | we dated a year and a half, and it was wonderful and full of firsts. recently we had been fighting more and more often. we both knew it was over, and on Saturday we decided to end it. we talked for a very long time about the major issue we had: it was too large a commitment for such a young age. i am going to a north eastern college in the fall, and he is going to a school across the country. this was definitely the right decision for us, and i know that i now have access to many opportunities i didn't previously, like college culture and not worrying about our shared future. i am grateful for the chance to find myself.
i am very thankful for an amicable and mutual breakup, as this guy has been my best friend for most of my teenage years. however, i am missing him very much, and it's hard to get used to not seeing him or hearing about his day. besides that, i am coping just fine with it, or at least i think i am, as this was my first relationship. we do not attend the same high school, i have many hobbies to keep me busy, and i have plenty of people to talk to. we have agreed on no contact.
my problem is that i'm not sure if i'm in denial about it or if i'm actually dealing with the loss of my best friend and first love in a healthy way. i know it will take much more time than i've given it, but i guess i want to get over him quickly so that we can be platonic friends and i won't have to miss out on experiencing him any longer. is this unrealistic? do you have any advice on moving forward from this? | my first relationship is over, we had an amicable breakup. how do i cope with the loss of a good friend? |
t3_4vyj0e | relationships | Am I [23 F] being completely unreasonable about my boyfriend [34M ] of 1 year missing our anniversary but then getting me flowers at the last minute | It was mine and my boyfriends 1 year anniversary a couple of days ago. I got him a card and he saw it sitting on my worktop at my house so he knew I'd got and wrote him one, then the day before he hinted he'd been with me all weekend so hadn't had a chance to get me a card. But wouldn't tell me if he had or hadn't arranged me anything. We had nothing planned to do so I had a little whinge that he didn't get me anything at all as I like to keep old cards like that.
Then the next day at work a big bunch of flowers & a little teddy show up and they're lovely! I say thankyou when we get back to his and he says 'see you need to trust me you shouldn't have moaned about me not getting you anything when I had these flowers planned all along blah blah' and I thought yup fair enough I shouldn't
But then I see when I get home today that it says on the envelope that he ordered them the day of our anniversary for same day, within 3 hour delivery, so he never had the flowers planned all along it was just something he did because I moaned...
Do I tell him I know he didn't plan to get me anything or do I just drop it and enjoy the beautiful flowers? | Boyfriend lied to me about having flowers planned for my anniversary when he ordered them the same day after me moaning - do I tell him or do I drop it? |
t3_386wa8 | tifu | TIFU by checking which of my eyes is dominant. | Okay so this didn't really happen today but... just kidding this happened around 10 minutes ago. So in history class our exam is basically an essay that we've got to research before the date of the exam. After explaining this to us, our history teacher (he's a brit with a really deep voice) gave us the entire hour long class period to research. Naturally, being my ADHD ridden self who can't work on one thing for long, I kept coming back to Reddit. I ended up on a FU about buying a left-handed rifle. Whilst browsing the comments, I came across one about figuring [out which eye is dominant] Now, Mr. History was telling us something (which I obviously did not hear) and I decided to test my eyes. As I was doing this, I realized everyone was staring at me. When asked what I was doing I barely managed to mumble, "checking to see which eye is dominant." Mr. History told me an easy way to figure out which one is dominant would be to aim. "Aim a gun at me," he said. I whipped out my air-assault rifle and aimed at him, with both eyes open, just like John Smith from Disney's Pocahontas taught me to. No one really understands what I'm doing, and I'm told several more times to aim at him. After he realizes what I'm doing Mr. History says, "So squint, like you're aiming down the sights." I'm feeling the pressure now, and attempt to squint. I forget how to squint. I close both eyes. I close my right eye. I close my left eye. Mr. History concludes that my left eye is dominant (after further testing, I concluded that it's not) and that since I am right handed, I shall always miss. "Yeah well since your left eye is dominant but you're right handed, you'll never score." Queue class "Ooooooooh" "Buuuuuurn" I even heard this one pun, "Shots fired!" (though I'm not sure if the person who said this quite understood how clever he was being.) After that, I huddled in shame behind my laptop. | Checked which eye was dominant, forgot how to squint, told by my history teacher I would never score in front of entire class. |
t3_48x9hq | tifu | TIFU manscaping | I'm not like extremely hairy, but the amount of hair that I have on my armpits and around my genitals kinda bothers me, and I have to trim/cut/shave it every now and then (thanks, Portuguese ancestors). So I go into my sister's room, get her some scissors that apparently she has for a decade and go back to my room to start cutting the hair around my cock.
I'm done there and when I'm trimming around the ballsack, I get distracted and actually cut my ballsack. In that moment, I realized I fucked up. The pain is instantaneous and makes me kinda do some jumps backwards and contract the muscles on my butt (ass cheeks or whatever you wanna call it) real hard.
And now actually I feel pain on my ballsack and my butt (Wtf?). I check my ballsack and the cut is not that bad. I stop the bleeding and wash it alcohol which is also kinda painful and makes my entire ballsack get warmer, but not that bad.
Meanwhile my butt still hurts A LOT, actually more than my
ballsack, and I start giggling at myself. how can I be such an idiot? Then I get concerned if I'll not be able to sit (lol).
A few minutes pass, and I get back to normal, get done manscaping and I'm now sitting with no pain on my chair, but kinda worried about those old scissors giving me and infection. | tried to cut the hair off my genitals, cut skin on my ballsack on the process, got a lot of pain both on my ballsack and on my butt because I'm an idiot and I might get an infection |
t3_ij1u7 | AskReddit | What is the biggest secret you are willing to share on the internet? | Mine is as follows:
One night when I was younger there was a pretty scary thunderstorm so I couldn't sleep. I went to my parent's room and started asking them if I could sleep with them but before I could finish the sentence I saw my parents "wrestling." So emotionally scarred me went back to bed thinking it was all a dream but a little while later my dad comes in and says I can sleep with them if I'm scared, so I join them but feel something wet under the sheets. This was pretty gross so I decided to wriggle away to the edge of the bed, but it was still wet there! After a while I got used to it and stared at the window trying to fall asleep. | I walked in on parents sexing it up during a thunderstorm and slept in what I think was their juices that night |
t3_tqhat | AskReddit | Introverts who get shit done, laid-back people who have TONS of energy, quiet people who dance all night: THIS IS FOR US. Can you tell some stories? | I'm about to turn twenty-one. Two years ago I travelled through South East Asia. Then I camped and hitch hiked around the Alps (not far from where im from) for awhile. This spring I spent four months travelling across the united states with a budy of mine, living out of a van, shouldering AK47s with cowboys, fourwheeling around the desert, mending barbedwire fences till my hands were bleeding, and then dancing it up on the westcoast. I spent a year in a small college. During finals week I read 6 novels and didn't study.
I've always had this certain drive, this energy but am actually quiet and laid back, sometimes awkward. Searching for a normal job to pay for college and classes themselves are excruciatingly bland, and I have zero motivation when it comes to doing that kind of thing. I am lazy and am not disciplined enough to do shit I need to do, but when it comes to travelling or anything spontaneous or interesting or dancing, I out-do myself.
Some of you know what I'm talking about. If so, want share a few stories or describe? | I do what i want to do, but fall asleep when faced with stuff i need to do. Do you know what I mean? |
t3_gvd9q | dating_advice | Went on a 'date' but unsure if she thought it was a date or friend hang-out | follow up to post:
Both 18 going to college, I asked her out at the end of classes on the second last day before mid-sem break (which is on now) and there was a cool little event on at the museum so I just said "wanna go somewhere tonight" sorta thing. Didn't explicitly say 'date' or 'go out'. Anyway, she said yes, and we ended up getting dinner, going to the place, getting dessert and popping by a bar for a drink. I ended up back at her college and went upstairs since I'd had a drink and wanted to wait a bit before driving. Ended up crashing in her bed, though nothing happened, not particularly good with the whole touching/escalating thing and thought since it was a 'first date' she might not be comfortable... though we do basically hang out every day in a bunch of friends.
Asked her in the morning when we were still lying in bed just hugging, and she said she had fun the other night and I asked if she'd want to do something 'proper' during the break (she lives far away from college), and she said yes again, suggesting that I come up to where she lives.
Now being the innocent inexperienced guy, I'm not sure if she would've considered the night a 'date' or if it was just a friendly hang-out, or whether the next 'date' is in fact a date. Since there wasn't any making out or hand holding or that stuff, would she be friend-zoning me or just thinking of hanging out as friends? Should I be escalating even if I don't know if she thinks its a date? It'd be a bit weird if I escalated and she considered us just friends... Should I be more direct or somehow be more obvious? | went on a first 'date' with a good friend, not sure if she thought of it as a date or if she thinks the next date is a 'date'. Should I be more overt or do something to show something? |
t3_2iu799 | relationships | Me 21F slept with someone 3months after ex 25m broke up with me - feeling disgustingly dirty and like I will never enjoy sex again | I've spent the whole day crying and I don't quite know what to say to myself to feel better. I got really drunk last night and had sex with a guy one of my friends recently had sex with. I kept telling him I didn't want to have sex, I don't know why I was there. I don't understand my behaviour when I'm drunk. I remember I started crying when he tried to have sex with me. Eventually I must of just given in and it was the most horrible painful sex ever. I Recently came out of a relationship (about u three months ago) and I can't lie I'm still in love with my ex. The thought of sex makes me feel physically ill since we broke up and I couldn't even imagine myself having sex. I knew this wasn't what I wanted. I wasn't looking for a rebound at all I knew it would only make me feel worse.
I can't put into words how awful I feel. I feel like a slut and so disgusting. I feel so broken. People make mistakes but this is the second time I have drunkenly slept with someone and hated must the next day. I'm going to give up alcohol but that will never take back what I have done. I just want sosmone to love me again without the sex but i feel like that's impossible. I never wanted to have sex with anyone but my ex and now I have. I told myself I would only sleep with someone if we are in love. I'm scared because this has just made me feel even more physically sick about sex even more so because it was so horrible and painful. I feel like it was such a waste of a number. Sex is such an intimate thing I can't believe I did it with such a stranger. I also don't know whether my friend will be mad at me. She told me that night that she slept with him but she said it was just sex and didn't mean anything. I know she said that but I reckon she'd be pretty upset and think I'm a slut if she found out. I hate myself and feel cheap and dirty. | Feel like I will never enjoy sex again. Hate myself. I can't undo the past so how do I get over my drunken mistake |
t3_35k93n | relationships | Is me [21 M] Asking someone I asked to go to school with [20F] to help me make friends a good idea? | Forwards to all my posts: I'm autistic (no I am not a person with autism I am autistic) enough to be considered for supported living community once my father passes away because I almost certainly won't be able to live on my own.
End Forward.
I recently found out over facebook that she goes to my university and is in some sort of like ~~female fraternity~~ Sorority (thank you DrAriGold).
She looks like she has a lot of friends and after being at university so long I thought she might be able to help but I haven't talked to her since high school.
She posted about how she did badly in all her classes and I have a really good GPA and I could probably help he with that stuff if she helps me with this. I'm just not sure if this is a good idea or not. I'm exploring options so that when I go back next semester I'm set to actually make friends.
End statement (not required for this situation):
------------------------------------------
Any advice to join clubs, keep my fucking dorm door open, or any other advice that you give to regular people every day is going to be ignored. I don't care how you made friends. I tried it and it didn't work. I'm asking about this specifically. Sorry if it comes across as hostile but that's because it is ^ . ^
I've applied your advice before and you can check my post history if you don't believe me. | I'm not sure if asking a person I went to high school with to help me make friends is a good idea. |
t3_406w5q | tifu | TIFU by not depositing my paycheck | Happened yesterday. Payday swings around and I get my check. I head back to my apartment and take a nap and completely miss the banks time to drop the check off. I've got a Tinder date later that night with a very nice looking Peruvian women and I'm fairly happy to get out of the house since I work entirely to much. When I go to the ATM later that night I find out I'm over drafted from the auto pay student loans transaction that drains all my money away from me every month. I've got 20 bucks on me so I figure I'm alright to pay for a few drinks for me since I'm driving anyways. Meet up have a few drinks and really connecting with the girl. Her friends show up later and start talking to her and we are all geared up to go back to there place and watch some southpark and just relax. Check comes and it's 31 and some change and I put down my 20 (my drinks totaled 13) and asked her if she could get the rest. She didn't bring her wallet assuming that I would pay for all of it. Her friends drag her outside while I'm trying to figure this out and I figure i'm about to get fucked on this bill that I have 0 more dollars for. I walk outside with the bartender yelling at me and eventually one of her friends pulls a card and finishes the bill. I'm standing with them after and the friend who pays for it curses me out for not paying for the entirety of the bill and tells me that i'm not coming back with them and that real men pay for their dates. I leave quickly anyways as I was not happy about the situation and head back home for some sleep. | Didn't deposit my check. Get cursed out by a friend of my date for not paying for it all the drinks. |
t3_4yr3gf | relationships | I [17M] have been speaking to a girl [17F] online and my girlfriend [17F] hates it | To keep it short, there's a girl I met online 8 or 9 months ago and we got on really well, turned into good friends (good internet friends I supoose). Talked every day, fun conversations, lots in common and lots to talk about. Just generally really liked each other as friends, wanted to meet up at some concerts.
If there was nothing stopping us I can genuinely say we'd be awesome friends right now.
In the time we spoke I gained feelings for her, more friendly than anything, just a general attachment to her I guess. I miss her when we don't speak, I love it when we do.
My girlfriend hates it and has always hated it. We argue and fall out about it often, so I can definitely say its destructive to our relationship. I love my girlfriend more than anything but I just can't seem to get this girl out of my head!
Recently my girlfriend messaged her and basically told her she's ruining our relationship and that she should stop it (a polite fuck off to be honest). This is light compared to the last time it happened.
Anyway the girl told me we should stop, she feels guilty for 'ruining my relationship' and I feel guilty that she has to deal with that.
We messaged once or twice more and then stopped, from normal to nothing in the space of a day.
I just don't know what to do. I love my girlfriend and would never want to lose her or replace her with some internet friend, but this other girl means a lot to me, it's like I can't just forget, no friend I've ever had has been like her, she's just perfect and I want to talk to her and meet her but I can't.
I feel so stressed because I know I only have to send that message and she'll be there, I know she would happily talk to me again but there's his invisible barrier stopping it. It feels so forced and fake but I have to listen to it.
I know you'll just tell me I need to support my girlfriend and fix things and forget this girl but I really need to talk about this... | I have feelings of some kind towards another girl and a good friendship with her but it's damages my relationship with my girlfriend and she has forced me and this girl to stop talking to each other and now I miss her |
t3_3fkbjm | relationships | My [21 M] Ex [21 F] and I kind of called it quits a couple years ago, because we couldnt properly be together. Alot happened, but now we're ready to try it again but my best friend is in love with her now that i'm back. What to do? | We have alot of history together, we grew up together, were like perfect for each other but so much happened, so we kind of decided it wasn't really possible.
Her brother was my closest friend too, until he died in a car accident. After that i got into some trouble with the law and things, and alot of family issues, other things. Most things are good now and i want to try it again, but it's been about a year, since i had contact with her or my friends.
I used to tell my friend how good of a girl she was, how perfect she was, he knew her a little too. I told him to look out for her while i'm gone. I didn't think i was ever going to be back especially this soon. At the time i didn't realize what i was doing.
I found out he's spending all his time with her, taking her on dates, and trying to get with her. I saw it on social media, and heard from others. What do i do? I haven't confronted him yet since it's been some time, we talked just a very little like last year before i found out. Help me out. | Problems separated me and my love since young, i went away but came back sooner than expected. One of my best friends trying to move in. It may be working. Help? |
t3_3z3u3o | tifu | TIFU By Beating Up My Best Friend | So last night (still considered today because it happened past midnight) I went to a party with a few close friends from high school. It was New Year's Eve, so of course we were drinking heavily. I was about half a bottle of jack and few shots in, and we concluded the party we were at was fairly boring. My brother happened to be at another party on the same street, so we decided to walk down there and check it out. So now I'm at this other party, and people are handing me more random drinks left and right, which I happily accepted. At this point I blacked out, so this story is a combination of a bunch of other people's stories. So somehow I heard that my brother was getting into a fight (he wasn't, there was no fight) and I completely lost it. I went outside and saw him arguing with his friend (also kind of my friend) and just started blindly swinging at this kid. A very close friend of mine grabbed me by the throat in an attempt to hold me back, and I turned around and punched him in the face. I then grabbed him and slammed him onto the pavement. At this point my brother grabbed me and threw me into a fence to hold me back, completely destroying the fence. So we obviously got kicked out of the house. Keep in mind that these events occurred at my MOTHER'S BOSS'S house, so talk about embarrassing. The girl wasn't supposed to have a party, but of course her parents found out after discovering a completely broken fence. I texted my friend who I beat up and for whatever reason he isn't mad and forgives me, saying "you were looking out for your bro and saw red". I also texted my brother's friend who I initially attacked, who also wasn't mad, saying basically "shit happens". I then texted the girl who's house it was at a long apology and told her I'll pay for the fence/damages, and she didn't even respond. Certainly not a great way to bring in the new year. | got blackout drunk at a new year's eve party, started a huge fight and broke a fence, then beat the crap out of my best friend for trying to hold me back |
t3_iagvk | cats | Indoor/outdoor cat question. Moving from appartment to house and would appreciate some advice on what is best for my cat. | I've had my cat since last December. I took him in my apartment when he was about 5 months old. Before that, he was a stray kitten living outside with other strays but since I got him he hasn't been out and had no contact with other cats. I'm planning to move to a house with a backyard. I've been discussing with my gf whether it would be better for him to leave him free to roam (he should have access to the outside world from the backyard) or confine him somehow within the house and the backyard. The neighborhood we're moving to is full with stray cats that regularly visit the house asking for food and I've often seen them in poor condition, sick and/or injured probably from fighting with other cats. I'm worried that Cornelius, my spoiled lazy cat, would not have much chance against those strays and I wouldn't like risking his health. What's your opinion reddit? Am I worrying too much? Any cool ideas how I could secure our small backyard to prevent the cat from roaming? Forgot to say, the cat is neutered and when we move we plan to take a second cat. | Moving to a house with a backyard. Should I confine my cat inside the house and backyard or leave him roam and socialize with other stray cats? |
t3_1olzp6 | relationship_advice | I'm [24/M] stuck in the middle of my dads [44/m] second marriage. | Title is a little misleading so here is some background information. My dad was married to my mom, they divorced in 2008. After the divorce my mother and I found out that my dad had actually cheated multiple times during the marriage.
In 2010 he remarried and moved cross country with this woman and her 3 kids. Now the problem. My dad has been going behind his new wives back and talking to his old lover. He has completely detached himself from her and even myself. He was planning to come and see me and my family during Christmas but decided to either go see his lover or see her on the way. My dads wife keeps messaging me over Facebook asking me not to tell my dad and asking for advice. Saying shes going to leave then changes her mind and says everything is good. Then quickly changes her mind a week later and it begins all over again.
How do I deal with this? I want to just call my dad and be like hey don't be a dick, or tell her to leave but i don't want to be that person to betray my dad and end his second marriage even though he started it. | Fathers new wife is coming to me about my dads infidelity and telling me to keep it a secret. I want to help but i don't want to be the person to end their marriage. |
t3_17f2n7 | relationship_advice | [18/f] Crush advice please? On [18/m] | I'm a freshman in university, and I have a crush on a guy I met at a club at the start of the school year. I've basically liked him since we met, but we only ever see each other at this club, 2-3 times a week when school is in session.
We've talked a bit just the two of us on a few occasions, and we get on quite well but I feel like it's a bit awkward since there are always other people around. I feel awfully uncomfortable attempting to flirt, and this is even worse when I have an audience. I get the impression that he's pretty shy himself. There have been a few times when I could have sworn that he was staring at me, but I rarely catch him at it.
I'm not sure whether or not my feelings are reciprocated, and I'm also not sure how to go about seeing more of him. I'm super shy to begin with, and I also don't want to make anything awkward if I'm rejected, since we will continue to see each other on a regular basis, and if he doesn't like me back I'd like to be friends. FYI: He doesn't really text or use facebook.
I think it's worth mentioning that I've never had a boyfriend, and that I can't eat food/drink I didn't prepare myself due to severe food allergies. | How do I spend more time with someone shy when we only have one activity in common and food isn't an option? |
t3_50hmy2 | relationships | I [26 M] asked a girl [24 F] out and she just kinda laughed at it. Should I call her again? | I did a 1 month internship which ended today. During that time I worked closely with a cute coworker I started to like a lot.
So today I said some dumb shit like "Hey, I wanted to ask you, since it's the last day of work today, if you want to go on a date with me". She started laughing and said "Woah that was direct, sorry but I'm not free today".
I got the feeling that she somehow took it as a joke or something, and because I'm a retard I didn't follow up on it and just took it as a no. Now I feel like shit and my already low self worth is even lower.
Should I call her and actually ask her again? Or should I just leave it be? | I asked a girl for a date and she didn't really respond and just laughed. Should I call her and actually ask her again? Or should I just leave it be? |
t3_2her82 | legaladvice | Can I get a restraining order again my crazy neighbor? [MT, USA] | Alright, long story short, I met this girl, Kathy, SIX WEEKS AGO, we hang out for a bit - she's definitely alcoholic. A few days ago by, she invites me over to her place, I eat dinner, we hang out, she drinks, I sleep on her sofa, and go home in the morning. THAT'S IT. That is the last time I ever saw her.
I leave that weekend for an adventure with my girlfriend, Jessica - I spend Friday, Saturday, with her, and come home later Sunday. Tons of pictures; we went to a couple of events, that sorta thing. On Sunday, I go over to my OTHER neighbor, Marie's place to hang out. I get to Marie's, and she is a screaming mimi! "KATHY CAME OVER, AND SAID YOU STOLE HER MEDICATION AND SHE WAS DRUNK AND SCREAMING, YADDA YADDA!" Whoa there turbo! Why would I steal her medication in the first place?! I have health insurance, and believe me, I don't need Prozac, LOL. A few weeks later, me and Marie have a falling out - due to unrelated matters. Marie is important, because when Kathy went over there, Marie was gonna call the cops she was so scared of Kathy. Mind you, I'm 25; Kathy is 40, and Marie is 65. These are grown ass women we're talking about, not college students.
Kathy texts me asking for $5 for beer, but I don't have $5, so I tell her no, explain that I was gone all weekend, and didn't have my phone, but in reality, I did, and I was ignoring her texts.
So, tonight, SIX WEEKS after all this shit goes down, Kathy texts both me and my other girlfriend, Melanie - just drunk, screaming, babbling that I stole her meds. I didn't steal them. She WON'T stop screaming at me. I blocked her before, but when she started texting, Melanie, I unblocked to see that she has been calling/texting without me answering - every couple of days. So, can I get a restraining order? | Montana. Crazy neighbor won't stop calling/texting/likely showing up at my house. Can I get a restraining order? No contact order? What do I do? |
t3_po0nf | legaladvice | My brother stole my identity... | I live in CA and my home of record is in NH. I was in the Coast Guard and have recently separated. Anyways, my older brother got pulled over in NH driving with a suspended license. He told the officer he had forgetting his drivers license and gave him my information. DOB, name and social. His social is one off from mine so he knows it. The officer than handed him a ticket for speeding and my brother went on his way. Fast forward, a couple weeks ago my parents (in NH and my home of record) called me about a speeding ticket that was no paid and that my license is suspended in all 50 states for not appearing in court. This is how I found out. Piecing what I thought could happen, I called the local PD who issued the ticket and explained I had a hunch who it was. The plates and truck that was speeding got traced to my brothers work. I am working on getting my license back, its DMV work so of course its a headache, but i have proven that it was not me who was issued the ticket, my Captain wrote a letter explaining that I was in California during the date on the ticket. My question is that the police told me that there is nothing to press charges against and that all my brother only "disobeyed a police officer" by giving false information. Not needing to give full detail of how my brother is a douche, I want to know what else I could possibly do. My insurance has went up, I am trying to get the point off my license let alone the money they will refund to reinstate my license. | My brother told a police officer he was me and I lost my license, is there anything I could charge him with? |
t3_4ktgge | relationships | Me [29 M] dealing with with a harsh breakup after 1.5 years with my [27 F], and want to ask a question about anxiety and depression. | I recently was broken up with by my girlfriend about two weeks ago. It is definitely a challenging and difficult time, and a moment in life i NEVER want to feel or go through again (though I have said that in the past). I do not commit easily, and I feel that emotionally and physiologically, I am just not in a great place. While I don't want to hash out the details of my total misery, anxiety and depression, I did want to ask two questions to this community. I need your help...I really need your support right now.
My anxiety is sky high at certain time throughout the day. Of course when I wake up, but also between the hours of roughly 2 and 6 pm. During the evening, life is not perfect, but I function well and feel better, whether I am with friends, alone or with family.
Does anyone have any idea why this may be the case? Also, does anyone have any methods to dealing with sleep awakening depression (please tell me this goes away without medical help)? I hate waking up at 5 am, and want my happiness back. I would do anything to be myself again. | Why does break-up anxiety/depression happen at certain time-points each day, and how can I help defeat sleep awakening depression? |
t3_3z1p67 | loseit | Any advice? | New to reddit, and /r/loseit. Sorry if this is a little long.
On Sunday I (f22, 5'10) stepped on the scales for the first time in a long while, and, thinking it would make me feel better, got my boyfriend (m24, 6'3) to have a go too. Turns out we weighed exactly the same. Down to the fraction of the pound: (180lb). He's got hollow legs, and can eat anything, but I'm really starting to show my weight gain.
I used to be very active (going for a walk every day), but when I was 19 I was diagnosed with Post Viral Glandular Fever, and still haven't properly recovered. I started smoking when I got to University and it became a coping mechanism, but in 2015 I gave it up, and have been smoke free for 6+ months now (the smoking used to keep my weight down).
Since Monday I've downloaded MyFitnessPal, cracked out the Wii Fit, gone on two runs, and one long walk. I've seen the tiniest of changes in my weight (now 12 st 9.5 lb) I know it's really early days, but I'm a little proud of myself. Just need to keep this up.
My aim is to get down to 145lb and see where to go from there. Does anyone know of any other things I can start doing/how to keep this up? | I (F 5'10) weigh the same as my bf (6'3) and need to start losing weight. Started on Monday. SW: 180lb; CW: 178lb GW: 145lb. Any advice? |
t3_fehxu | AskReddit | Advice on Vacation Discrimination | I need advice on the vacation discrimination I am currently facing at work. The story is in my first year at the corporation my department pushed for everyone to get four weeks' vacation every year afterwards. Below is how I chose to take vacation.
My first year I took one week out of two we initially got then carried over one week because I did not have anything I wanted to take it for. My second year I become more proficient and get more responsibilities and I took 2 days a week for about 8 weeks. During this time of my supervisor complained so I made the effort to come in for half days and recovered some of my vacation. Other days that I tried to schedule in March but were denied were the day after thanksgiving (approved the week before thanksgiving and added ~150$ to trip expenses) and the last week of December. The reason given was I was too essential to the operation to let me take vacation and due to my taking 2 days a week a verbal policy was made that no one else can do the same. At the end of this year there was a policy saying that everyone could take over any vacation they had due to a special project so I did not worry about getting in any vacation before the last minute.
This year I put in for 5 weeks' vacation so I can go to school and do a double or go to Coachella (making it the center of a road trip to America). I am willing to compromise at 3 weeks to make the impact less but that still leaves 5 weeks' vacation that I need to use.
The reason that I think that this is discrimination is because others in my department can get vacation requests approved at any time without any questions, but these people have done some actions to cause my supervisor some fear of them.
Relevant Information: Employer is in NY State. | My supervisor (and possibly manager) are denying my vacation requests saying that I am essential to the operation, while others are free to take any vacation they want. |
t3_2onunz | relationships | Is my [28M] girlfriend [27F] overreacting about a Christmas gift? | I don't think I'm in the wrong here, but I wanted to seek advice as we've been arguing about it all weekend.
A little background, I use to have a crush on this girl I currently work with. I should say that I'm here on work visa, and that she was my first real friend here in America. Nothing ever became of it and we both moved on. She's actually engaged now. I really wanted to get her something nice, so I took her to a jewelry store to get her a necklace. I also got the fiance a nice tie.
Now, my girlfriend is kind of the jealous type. I thought it would be harmless to not tell her I was getting a necklace for my friend, to avoid and miss-communications or fights. So I told her I got the necklace for my sister. Well she found out, and we had a big argument over it. I want to say that my intentions were honest, and I just wanted to get my friend and her fiance weddings gifts.
Now that it's Christmas time, I wanted to get my girlfriend a gift. She kinda found out that I wanted to get her jewelry from the same store, and she blew up on me. I firmly believe i'm not doing anything wrong, and the location of the gift is a non issue. The gift itself should be a non issue, and it should be about thought instead. I have a card card for this place for financing purposes. Go else where would be pointless. Am I wrong to get her a gift from this place? | Bought a former crush/current friend a necklace. Wanted to get my girlfriend something too for Christmas from the same place. She blew up on me. Am I in the wrong? |
t3_2s5c7j | relationships | Me [25M] with my GF [26F] of 3 years, how to cope with silent treatment | Hi, I am entering my 3rd or 4th day of being given the silent treatment by my GF. When things are good between us they are great, but when conflicts arise as they are sure to do, she will often ignore me for days on end. We are currently long-distance and last time this happened, I messaged her once a night for a week while trying to give her space. I've learned since the past occurrences that her silent treatment is meant to punish me and make me feel worthless for what I've done wrong. I've read many online resources to try to understand what I can do, but nothing has been ideal so far.
At the moment, I am at a loss as to what to do. I know I must broach the silence, but I find myself paralyzed in fear for perhaps the first time in my life. I feel that no matter what I say or do, not only will it not matter, but it will probably be used against me to make me feel worse. For example if I apologize, I think she will tell me it's too late, and say something about how it just goes to show what a bad person I am deep inside. Or if I try to tell her that I feel scared to talk to her while she is silently angry at me, she'll tell me that I don't trust her enough and there's something wrong with me again. I also don't want her to think this technique of hers is an effective way of getting what she wants, and that it's actually very hurtful to me. I want to be able to tell her that the relationship is important to me without having that used against me.
I do believe she is a reasonable person... but her current actions show she is not right now. Is that possible? I can tell just from the tone of her messages whether or not I'll be laid into. But I don't know how to reach her and tell her I want to work together on a resolution, rather than force each other to jump through hoops. Is waiting in agony while the person I used to share dreams with treats me like less than dirt the only way? Is it possible she does not realize what she's doing? | GF giving me silent treatment. Feeling less than worthless. Afraid to talk to her because in the past I was ignored or made to feel worse. |
t3_pxze3 | relationships | Girlfriend lost attraction for me. Best just to move on? Or can it be fixed? | Her: 22, Me 21. Together for about 6 months.
She (22) is technically my ex girlfriend now (we broke up a while back because she was having some bad feelings which I thought was because of the sexual abuse she had experienced in her past) but she told me yesterday that she isn't attracted to me sexually anymore. At first when I heard this, I was kind of relieved because it was something that I thought I may be able to fix. I've been working out for a couple years now and I saw this as motivation to just workout harder and get sexy. But now that I've slept on it, I feel like I shouldn't be trying to change for her. Everything in the relationship was absolutely perfect except for this so some part of me feels like I should at least try to fix it by working out harder. That part of me sees it almost as just another issue that needs to be fixed.
In the 5ish months that we were together, we had a great sex life, or so I thought. She told me that I could turn her on and get her off like no one else ever could. We couldn't keep our hands off of each other. We were long distance so when we did see each other we would "fuck like rabbits", as she put it once. I don't know what changed. She is going through some stuff right now. She recently moved to my city back in January and this is the first time she's ever been away from home. She also just started a new job a couple weeks ago. She still has a lot of adjusting to do so maybe all this external stress is killing her interest in me?
Am I wasting my time with all this? Should I talk to her about it some more and see if there is anything either of us can do? I feel like shit right now. Just the thought of her being more attracted to other guys makes me sick. | Girlfriend doesn't find me attractive anymore. Is it worth attempting to fix by hitting the gym or should I just move on? |
t3_306d9q | tifu | Reddit TIFU by being an asshole for a few months | "Notice this was about 2 years ago"
So i was at a mma place at 2013 then this new guy came to the dojo he looked about my height and age so I got that competitive ass attitude against him. So once I spared with him and I started hitting him really hard then he got hurt but actually after speaking to him for a while he was the nicest guy I met like really. I left the place in 2014, but I can never forget how nice that dude was and how much of an ass I was.
So reddit never judge someone until you actually know them TRUST ME. | tifu by being an asshole to a guy but turned out to be the nicest guy and new good friend. |
t3_1vq5ow | relationships | 20/M with GF 19/F. Should I be pissed? | We were mucking around together with her phone the other night and we went into calls.
I saw she had a missed call from her ex (she ended it 4 months ago, she had kissed me just before they broke up (I had a gf aswell) which I saw she had called him back and she claims she only spoke to him for 3-5 minutes.
I was a little upset, she said that she was just being nice by returning his call.
She also went out the other night and she tends to get pretty drunk (which gets me worried) and is generally a friendly/flirty person.
She gets credit for telling me but her friend was chatting with some guy at the club and invited her and all her friends (including my GF) to come back to his apartment with him and all of his (male) friends which they all did.
She told me she was staying at her friends house(she was there) and didn't want to leave by her self.
Should I be pissed at these scenarios? I haven't been too pissed yet as she is away with her girlfriends for the week and I want to speak to her in person about it. | She called her ex BF and her and her friends went back to a guys apartment with him and his guy friends. Should I be pissed? |
t3_3i3wa6 | relationship_advice | Am I wrong for feeling jealous? | I'm in a long distance relationship with a girl that I've known for almost three years now. It took a long time before she returned the feelings I had for her and when she did it was great. A year later she's tells me there's another guy, and I told her to go and see if they works out with him since he lives close to her. A few months later she starts talking to me again saying she really didn't like him in the end, and that she wanted me. We just talked about this again and it made me feel a little jealous. It took two years of constant talking for us to start a relationahip, and know we even say we love each other. The most we have ever done was send videos to each other talking. She knew him for about a month, and when she thought she liked him, they started skyping constantly. | Is it wrong that I feel jealous that a guy got further with my girlfriend than I did in a shorter amount of time, even though she says she loves me? |
t3_3ym9ct | relationships | I [17/M] got out of a toxic relationship of 2 years several months ago, still feeling effects from it. | The relationship I had was really really toxic for me, mostly for the fact that my girlfriend was skilled in gaslighting. I honestly don't think she did it intentionally, she doesn't seem that manipulative, but it has had a far greater effect on me than I've previously realized.
I was having a conversation about gaslighting earlier, and after some research (made sure all of the sites were legit, all of the stuff I found were from PhDs.) and realized I still suffered from several symptoms, most evidently constantly questioning myself and being over-apologetic, even when I knew it wasn't really necessary.
I just never noticed until now that this type of stuff probably isn't normal, and was hoping that some of the people on here might have dealt with similar situations, and had some advice on rebuilding confidence. | Girlfriend used gaslighting to keep me with her for two years, just realized I'm still experiencing symptoms 6 months after the break up. Please help. |
t3_k8vso | AskReddit | How easy is it to replace your own radiator? | My radiator has a small 2-3" crack on the plastic top. I tried a [Permatex Radiator Repair Kit] but I don't think it set right or something as it just started to leak around the top edge of the patch. So I threw another one on top of that. It also failed. Both patches eventually just peeled off. Then I threw some [JB Weld] on it and let it sit for 36 hours. after about 20 minutes of driving, the JB Weld cracked and the car again started over-heating and steaming coolant. Anyway, I've come to accept the fact that I just need to replace the radiator. How difficult is this to do over a weekend in your own garage?
I fancy myself pretty auto-competent. I've done my own oil changes, installed a cold air-intake, and done most general "under-the-hood maintenance" type things, though I am a little out of practice.
Is it even worth it replacing it myself, from a money-saving standpoint? | Radiator was leaking, patched it multiple times to no avail. I'd like to save some money and replace it myself and would like to know how easy it is. |
t3_2c9220 | relationships | I [20M] have been with my gf [19F] for about 6 months now but I haven't seen her for the last 3 months. Last night, I messed up. | I figure it's important that I state that this girl and I aren't officially dating, we haven't defined anything, but I know she'd be hurt if she read this.
Last night, one week away from seeing my gf again, I had sex with another girl on impulse. It didn't mean anything to me, just something fun to do to pass the time, like video games, but I do realize it was wrong.
My question is, what's the best way to handle this? Can I put it behind me and simply ask to define the relationship immediately when I get back or what? Any help would be great. | cheated" on a girl I really like with a girl I just thought was attractive, and I'm not sure why I did it, or where to go from here |
t3_47gblh | relationships | I [21F] broke up with my boyfriend [24M] a week ago, and miss him terribly. | I don't know if I even want to move on, I just know that our relationship was at times toxic, and at times incredible. We've been together on and off for 2 years.
He has borderline personality and is addicted to cocaine and alcohol, which he uses when he 'relapses' (conveniently when I go out of town). When he's not using and not being manic, like I said, it's really, really good. I think there have been some abusive elements (we had a physical altercation while drunk last April), and the cops have been called on us fighting three different times.
Basically I found him on Tinder in November, which I was upset about, but we talked it out and he promised he wouldn't do it again. I went away last week and when I came back, my cousin told me that she saw him on there again. Both times, he went out partying (after swearing he was clean) and I'm still not really sure where he went during this time. He's done this on four separate occasions during the four months we've lived together.
This time, I told him I was done with his shit, and he left. He's from a different city, so he moved back there the same day (3 hours away).
If I stay with him, I lose all support from my family and friends. None of them think we should be together. Logically, I know we shouldn't be. But I'm in love with him, and feel like I may have overreacted. It's also easy to justify getting back together because I look at his behaviour as a by-product of his illness. Every time we get back together, he promises he'll seek help. At first he does, but his ambition starts to dwindle. He's been begging me to come back.
I really do not think I'll love anyone as much as I love him. I've had a crush on him since I was 17, and I'm scared that none of my next relationships will be as meaningful. Has anyone experienced this, and did you get over them? How do I stop myself from calling him and telling him to come home? | ex and I have turbulent relationship, not sure if I should stay away, miss him, need to get over him. |
t3_4m4j0z | relationships | Me [26 F] with person I'm starting to date [39 M] for 3 months, seems like maybe he's an emotional wreck | I've been starting to see someone that I've known for nearly four years, we met because he was one of my closest friend's boyfriends. Their relationship ended a few years ago, she moved abroad, and over time he and I became close friends. We both asked separately if our friendship was alright and she approved.
Late last year I realized my feelings for him went beyond friendship, and we began a mild flirtation mainly via text message as he told me he felt the same way. He was and still is one of my best friends so at first it was confusing, especially because we were so linked by my best friend, but this year my friend got married.
And so we went on a few dates but have only kissed at this point, in part because I've been working quite a bit. But also in part because he's 'afraid of being vulnerable.' He often says one thing but does another, like via text he'll act cavalier but has initiated all of our plans. He talks often of being afraid to open up and yet we spend hours and hours just talking, often late into the night. He's picked me up from the airport after I've been gone, drives over an hour just to take me to dinner and is eager to meet my friends and be a part of my life. But conversely, he speaks of how damaged and sad he is often and my friend mentioned he self harmed at the end of their relationship.
I don't know if this is a phase or if it's just a permanent representation of who he is as a person. I'm afraid to get more invested and him never be able to commit. | guy i've known for years and i are beginning a relationship but it seems perhaps overly complicated and fraught with his emotional delicacies? |
t3_23qvah | relationships | Me [27 f] worried our unconventional marriage (5 years) is too skewed his [28 m] way. | We have pretty well balanced our differing personality types; I'm medium extroverted, he is heavily introverted. And there remains to be found any human I have felt more connected to.
But... His social hang ups are starting to hold me back for the first time.
I'm not able to do things I want because they will make him uncomfortable for various reasons. My goals as a late-20s adult are becoming more socially and community-building oriented. But...we share a house and a life, and I can't explore all those goals.
We have decent sex several times a week, have fun on the rare times we interact, but more and more we lead separate lives. There is no physical affection (besides the normal sex) but I want more...plus a person who spends time with me by choice. There isn't animosity or anything, but definitely frustration on my end. Whenever I try talking with him about it, I get upset because it comes out wrong and hurts him and makes him feel like he's doing everything wrong.
Also, and this is pretty weird to me, we don't share a bed at night. We usually did, but it's not unusual for him to prefer the couch. Again, I don't think there is any hidden animosity, he just likes sleeping alone.
So I just try to get used to the way things are, and I try to be supportive of his needs for long stretches of alone time. But that can't be the answer...can it? It's not easy at all to build solid friendships when your husband is so extremely introverted. Do I just need to suck it up (more)? Should I speak up? How? | introverted hubs is loved by extroverted me, but the difference is getting to me. What do I do? |
t3_w5pv6 | AskReddit | I was just reading the worst service thread and started thinking, what's the worst "service" you've received at a doctors office? | I am currently a dental student but have worked as a dental assistant and a dental hygienist in the past. I want to know if people have had to put up with long waits, rude nurses/doctors and any other annoyances you've had at a doctors office.
My most recent example happened at the local hospital. I had to come in for a first thing in the morning follow up for some previous bloodwork and decided to go in the day before to ask what I needed for the following day (the hospital is 2 blocks from my school). I ask to get an appointment for the following day and am told I won't need one just show up in the morning and the doctor would be able to see me. I ask the scheduling nurse what time the doctor gets in and she says between 8:30 and 9:00am.
I show up the next morning at 8:45 and notice there are several people already there. I sign in and start my wait. Around 9:00 the nurse calls in everyone ahead of me on the sign in list, no big deal, I'm not exactly in a hurry. 9:30 rolls around and they call in the person after me on the list. At this point I'm starting to get a little mad because I had specifically asked for an appointment the day before to keep this exact thing from happening. Around 9:45 I walk up to the scheduling/clerk nurses and ask when I will be seen. I tell them the person after me has been called, I've been waiting for an hour and I looked right at the nurse from the previous day and said you told me I didn't need an appointment. After some arguing, one of them finally got off their ass and got me into a room within 5 minutes. | Doctor's office was not smart enough to schedule an appointment, made me wait over an hour to see the doctor for all of 5 minutes. |
t3_1sdfrh | relationships | Me [17M] with my girlfriend [16F] of almost 8 months, how can I express my needs in the best way possible? Or, alternatively, how can I let it go? | Please, no r/relationships circlejerk about teen relationships, I am just politely wanting advice.
My girlfriend and I have been together for 8 months next week and I would like some advice about how to express some lack of satisfaction. I have been feeling lack of satisfaction when it comes to intimacy, my girlfriend seems only to want to make out occasionally, and seems to be satisfied with only that. She is really unwilling to go any further, and only says something along the lines of feeling overwhelmed or wanting to take it slow. She's a very introverted girl, and tends to have trouble expressing her ideas, and feelings. Her mom really did a number on her growing up, nothing abusive, just very strict, controlling and stern. I think one of my problems is that, since I've always had a high sex drive, it's really hard for me to understand her feelings on this.
my problem lies in how to express this in the best way possible. I've tried before but caved in from feeling selfish or guilty. I don't feel that I am completely unreasonable in wanting to further our intimacy, but I don't know how to ask for her to, especially with her feelings on this. I don't like comparing, but it's hard not to draw on my past relationships for judgement of when we reached certain levels of intimacy, and I think it's hard for me to transition to a much slower relationship. How can I go about asking for further intimacy without looking like an ass?
I don't think that is the only solution though. Do you guys know of any ways that I could put these feelings out of my mind? I am just as open to this, and in some ways would prefer it more.
Also, please no comments about leaving her, she means a lot to me, and I like our relationship, this is the only snag. | In 8 months there's been very little development in intimacy, how can I express my desires more assertively, or alternatively, how can I let it go? |
t3_s35qb | AskReddit | Reddit,what are some things you guys regret doing that didn't allow you to do something. | Ok so i was at a science camp about 2 years ago. It was the third day we were there and we went on a hike.Our guide told us to go explore caves so we went. There was no other exit except the entrance wich was pretty hard to exit out through.To exit we had to jump off these rocks about 6 feet down.There was about 12 other people there.I was last of all 12.All 11 had got down safely.My turn.My luck turned from good to Bad Luck Brian.I jumped down and my foot got stuck in a crack to the side.CRACKK you could hear it halfway across the cave.The guide came and took me to the bus.The pain was excruciating.When everybody went to go eat I was left on the bus.When we got back to school I wanted to call home.A stupid lady said I couldn't and she didn't care what happened to my foot.When I got home I found out I got a sprained ankle.What I regretted was jumping off because I had an upcoming soccer tournament and I was goalie.Sadly we lost. | I jumped off a six foot cliff of rocks and sprained my ankle no allowing me to play in my soccer tournament. |
t3_10ylnb | relationship_advice | I Need Advice, I'm Completely Lost Here | My (currently ex) boyfriend and I started dating around late March of last year. It was a good relationship, a lot of trust, very laid back and we just had fun. Best friends who went on dates, held hands, and hugged is a good way to put it.
We broke up in June because we would not be able to see each other over the summer, and decided it would be beneficial to split for an indefinite amount of time. After summer, we began dating again. It's been exactly two months since then.
Something changed in him though. He began getting almost controlling. The majority of my friends are guys, and he'd repeatedly make overly dramatic statements like "Every time you talk to a guy it's like a knife through my heart". Eventually he began flat-out accusing me of cheating on him with my best friends. We've been fighting about it for a couple weeks now, and finally today (after a fairly large fight) I told him I just needed a break, a split. I eventually realized that today was our "Two Monthiversary", as he put it.
I just felt like if he couldn't trust me, it wasn't a relationship worth having. But I still like him...a lot. More than I should, I guess. He told me he still loves me, but I just don't know what to do anymore. On one hand, he's basically called me a whore, and he told me he thought I was capable of cheating on him. We've also broken up once before this, before the summer, so this would be our third time dating. I feel like this may be too much. | Boyfriend accuses me of cheating one time too many, broke up, don't know if I should date him anymore. |
t3_1nzfpo | AskReddit | How can I overcome my semi-fear of deep water? | Long version : When I was a teen I could swim like a fish. Loved to swim, loved the high dive, etc. When I became a parent, one of my kids had a near-drowning experience. I didn't think much of it afterwards until the first time I approached a pool. Suddenly I was kinda terrified of the deep end. I KNEW I could swim, KNEW that I was in no real danger, but I still had a near panic attack just thinking about going in the deep end.
I just decided to not worry about it and just not swim anymore. I knew that if I ever did fall in a pool, I would be terrified but I would be able to get out.
However, now I desperately want to start using swimming as exercise and don't want to look like a chump who just swims half the pool and then turns around before reaching the deep end.
My current thinking is that if I just stay in the water enough, looking like a chump for a month or so, I will naturally overcome my fear. However if that doesn't happen I would like other options. I was thinking that maybe there are specially designed swim trunks or something that gives you enough lift to make you feel safer without looking like you are wearing a life jacket? | I am a pussy who is scared of the deep end, what can I do to get back in the big boy part of the pool? |
t3_25gy1w | relationships | Afraid a problem I [30M] am experiencing may drive away the girl [24F] I've started seeing | First off, apologies if this isn't the correct subreddit for this, I wasn't sure if it should go here or r/sex.
Anyway, I've been seeing a new girl that I am extremely interested in and attracted to for about a month now. I know I'm really into her and as best as I can tell she feels the same about me, and things have been going well between us. Last night I stayed over at her place for the first time, one thing lead to another and we tried having sex. And of course, for the first time in my life (outside of whiskey dick at least), I couldn't get it up. This has legitimately never been a problem for me, and in fact I find it even more frustrating because in my last relationship I had a much higher libido than my girlfriend and it created a rift between us. Now I'm seeing a new girl with a high libido who is very sex positive and *I'm* the one having problems, and I don't know how to handle it.
I know I'm completely over my ex so there's nothing involving her that could be coming into play with this. I *am* on an anti-depressant that I've been taking for about six or seven months (citalopram) which my doctor informed me could have negative effects on my sex life, it just wasn't a big concern at the time cause I wasn't sexually active. I am going to talk to my doctor and see if there's something else I can be prescribed that won't impact my sex life at all, but in the meantime I'm just worried of how it's going to come off to the girl. She was understanding of the situation but I can tell it bothered her, and rightfully so.
So basically, is there anything I can do to help alleviate this issue until I can get a new prescription and wait for it to start taking effect on me, would something like viagra or cialis help? And on top of that, what can I do to ensure my girl doesn't lose interest in me or form/hold some negative opinion over it? | Seeing new girl I really, really like. First time we try to have sex I can't get it up, then become really self conscious about it and worried how the girl in question is going to take it. Need halp. |
t3_1q8yas | relationship_advice | Bf (M.20) of 2.5 years ended things with me (20.F) where do I go from here... | Well in a nutshell we had a lot of issues that went unresolved because we failed to communicate. He wasn't happy so he ended things after an incident a week ago. He has asked to remain friends, which I would like. He was my first love, and an important person in my life. But right now I still want him back and I love him romantically still. I just don't know what to do or where to start.. my heart hurts and he seems to be over it completely. Wants to be friends and keep talking but seems like he is avoiding me... what should I do Reddit.. I can't eat, can't sleep it just hurts and feels numb. I wanna cry but like can't. | SO of 2.5 years ended things, feeling torn and broken hearted. Wants to stay friends but its making it harder for me to take the time away for myself. |
t3_2j3g5h | relationships | Me I'm no longer "in love"[24 M] with my so [23/F] of 4 years | I've been with my so for about 4 years and don't love her anymore.
I've lived with her for about 2 years and she's been one of the greatest people in my life she's helped me a lot.
However I've always had my doubts about our relationship due to our unexciting sex life. She's gorgeous yet not very interesting in the sack leading me to not going to bed at the same time avoiding it etc.
- We have had discussions about improving it and things like that but we never seem too interested in doing it and don't follow through - we also got very different plans for our future and children etc.
I just don't know how to go about this with the least backlash possible.
I live with her and our roommate and I'm not sure what I should do about this whole situation.
I just feel worse and worse about how I feel with each passing day.
I need advice. | Been with So for 4 years, living together 2 - don't love her anymore - need to break it to her and my roomate. Don't know what to do. |
t3_2h3xni | relationships | I [22f] need help asking out an older British colleague [30m] who doesn't seem too forward or.. American in his ways. | I'm a fresh out of undergrad, 22-year old lab tech working in an academic lab. There's a 30-year old PhD student that I think is really cute and charming (He's also British).
He asks the entire lab if anyone wants to go play tennis, is into certain music, and I'm usually the only one so we go hang out. It's not like he's specifically asking me out. He's also really friendly with everyone, not just me. Thus we end up hanging out a decent number of times, and it's always really fun. It's possible that he's just being friendly because we genuinely have sports and music tastes in common. But I would like to find out if he's interested in more, because I'm pretty smitten by him.
Any tips on how to ask an older guy out, maybe one that didn't see you in a romantic light up until now? I've also heard that British guys are less forward, so I guess I have to factor that in too. Or maybe I'm overthinking this. Halp. | Tips on how to ask an older guy out, especially one who's culture isn't very forward, are much appreciated. |
t3_23j6nr | relationships | Married and singles of Reddit! What is protocol for wedding well wishes regarding a fizzled friendship between the bride and the well-wisher? | A friend(F/26) and I(F/25) were acquaintances prior to her relationship with her now husband. We became better friends over time and during the period of her relationship with him. Much to my dismay, suddenly, things between us took a sharp right turn and we mutually ended our friendship. I moved away, but when I returned to see some other friends for a visit, she wanted to make a truce. I passively agreed, but we both knew we wouldn't speak to each other after I left.
She got married this past Friday to her now husband, and although we aren't connected on Facebook, I still wished her and her main squeeze well through texts with the cell numbers I have for them. This would indicate to readers that weve previously had communication though these numbers; we have. She didn't recognize the number - must've obtained a new phone and needed new contact numbers at one point in time - and I told her it was me. She never responded back, either in acknowledgement or with a thanks.
My question is, isn't it most appropriate to thank *anyone* sincerely wishing you well for such a significant moment in your life whether youre friends, acquaintances, or not, or on talking terms or not? I could care less what *she* does, but for future instances... What should I know going forward? | A (once, good) friend got married; I said 'grats, she didn't acknowledge. What now? |
t3_2agsur | tifu | TIFU by not remembering I didn't close the drawer above me | So I'm at work today pulling some parts for an order. We have this room where the non-metal stuff is. I have to pull 8 of this particular part, so it's kind of a lot to carry in one hand and its the top filing cabinet. As I'm getting them all situated in my hand one drops and of course falls under the fucking cabinets (we have them on sets of wheels so we can move them around when inventory counting time comes around).
So no big deal, i get on my stomach and reach far under there to get it. For the backstory, i have been lifting weights and such to get into shape and felt like pushing myself up fast instead of just being lame and getting up slow and shit. So anyways, i get into a pushup sort of position and get my knees under my chest and FLING myself upward!
What i didnt know was that i forgot to close the fucking drawer. I jumped up so fast and with such strength that i hit my head right on the fucking god damn bottom corner really fucking hard.
I was kind of stunned. Just like "uhhhh what the fuck how that really really hurts.." luckily i have thick skin and strong bones (drink your milk kids) and didnt bleed or anything. I definitely feel like one of those cartoon characters with the big ass bump on their heads when something falls on them.
Not as big as a fuck up as some other ones but it was MY fuck up and wanted to share it. | forgot to close top filing cabinet drawer, flung myself upward because of new found strength and confidence, smack head right into the fucking corner of the bottom of the drawer. |
t3_2yvodc | tifu | TIFU by talking my head off about a girl at dinner without realizing three of her friends were sitting in the next booth over. | I tend to be a pretty talkative person, especially around friends and family, which is kind of odd because the rest of my family is pretty quiet. I also have a tendency to talk about other people and the conversations I've had with them recently. I know it sounds a little weird, but most people who know me get used to it after a while.
Anyways, I went out to dinner with my parents tonight, and as usual, I did most of the talking. I got to talking about a girl I know from school, one who I've wanted to date for a while now, though I've never had much luck due to her on-again off-again boyfriend. We've actually become good friends though, despite my many failed attempts to hit on her. I mentioned her name at some point in the conversation, and my parents both started asking me about her. So I just started talking and didn't know when to shut up, as usual.
When we got up to leave after dinner, I noticed someone I knew in the booth next to us. Three of her friends had been right next to us the whole time, and given their facial expressions when I glanced over at them, I'm guessing they were listening to the whole conversation. To make things even more awkward for me, one of these girls was one that I had asked out before and been rejected. I just casually said hi and went on my way, but I was actually really embarrassed and just trying my best to hide it. I don't know if they've told her or are going to, but she already knows I'm interested so at least it probably won't be too much of a surprise. Then again I basically just declared my love for this girl in front of three of her best friends without even thinking about it. | I basically just declared my love for a girl who has a boyfriend in front of three of her girlfriends without even realizing it. |
t3_3p1ijy | relationships | I [22 F] hit my ex [30 M] after he lied to me and verbally abused me. Is there hope of us ever being friends or more again? | When I was with my ex things were an emotional roller coaster. My biggest problems with him were that he was friends with girls he slept with and had a picture of his ex in his room. He lied and said it was an old friend. When I found out the truth, he didn't apologize. Instead, he made excuses and threw my possessions outside and kicked me out of his place.
I ended up freaking out and punched him. Even though he had lied and manipulated me I still cared. I apolized after hitting him. I realize I should have just left. I made a lot of mistakes in that relationship too.
I was depressed and emotionally unstable and sometimes took it out on him. I never forgave him for making excuses for being friends with girls who he had relations with. Mostly because these girls would actually talk to me about it and compare their friend with benefits relatioship to our romantic relationship.
I don't want to to get into every detail. We both made mistakes and didn't treat each other amazingly.
But anyways, I've been seeing him in college and we just avoid each other. He has told me not to talk to him again and I have listened but I still have feelings.
Should I just let it go and accept that it will never work and we can never speak again? | My ex and I had a lot of problems. One day I caught him in a lie and he threw my belongings outside and I hit him. Should I just let go even though I still care? |
t3_2ldu3r | relationships | My ex-girlfriend [17 F] is really unsure about getting back together with me and I [17 M] am not sure how to prove to her its the right thing to do | We broke up about a year ago. I broke up with her because I was feeling really pressured about having to be with her for the rest of my life. Everything was perfect and it was like we had found our perfect match right away.
I was afraid I wouldn't be able to experience enough in this world if I was together with the same girl my whole life. I got in a relationship really quickly after we broke up, about 4 months after. I hated that relationship, we really just did not work together.
This just made me more sure that my ex-girlfriend is the right one for me and I want nothing more than to be with her again but she doesn't trust that I really want it and she thinks that I am just lonely. And I can not really "prove" anything. Absolutely panicking because I gave up the best girl in the world, what do i do? | Broke up with my girlfriend for the wrong reasons, she thinks it might be a bad move to get back together, but I know it's not. |
t3_30gdbr | relationships | Me [17 M] with my girlfriend [17 F] is going to a party this weekend, and I'm not sure I'm 100% comfortable with it | My girlfriend is helping her friends mom plan for a surprise party for her friend. Now the mom is pretty irresponsible and honestly it kind of annoys me that she's taking advantage of my girlfriend's offer to help and dumping most of the planning work on her while she's out shopping, but that's an entirely different argument.
Basically this mom is one of those parents who allows her daughter to drink and basically have alcohol at her party. My girlfriend told me this, and said she might not be home that night to Skype me, as if she was too drunk shed probably stay at her friends. I'm definitely not comfortable with the prospect of my girlfriend getting extremely drunk at a party without me there. And to make matters worse, her friends best friend is some guy who has somewhat hit on my girlfriend in the past, and honestly makes me a bit uncomfortable, and my girlfriend was very understanding of this, and despite disagreeing that he has a thing for her, she agreed to mostly cut him out of her life, though I told her she didn't have to. While that was resolved, and I don't believe my girlfriend to be untrustworthy, it doesn't exactly make me feel any better about this situation.
Should I be comfortable with the prospect of my girlfriend possibly getting very drunk at a party without me, and staying there? She's very lovi g and has never shown me any reason not to trust her, but I guess all the stories on r/relationships and horror stories of alcohol fueled cheating, have kind of jaded me, and I've never had a girlfriend go out and get drunk without me being there, so I'm a bit uncomfortable with the situation. | Girlfriend going to a party this weekend and could get very drunk, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with this at all, despite her not showing me any reasons not to trust her. Any advice? |
t3_4a3oci | relationships | He (M26) bailed again, I (F26) can't keep doing this | Throwaway just in case. This may be a bit scrambled, I'm upset and not sure if I'm being selfish or not.
Bit of background, I've know B for a year and half, met through a dating site, started as friends and then kinda bounced between dating and not dating. We didn't see each other often, maybe every other weekend, which was ok at first. I started to push for more, and B backed off. He then told me that he didn't mean to back off, but due to some health issues he was anxious and nervous about dating, and didn't want to lead me on. One of the health issues is being tired a lot, which can be a struggle for him to go out.
Through out our whole relationship, B has bailed on me time and time again. I was sympathetic for a while, I understood that if you have no energy you literally can't go anyway, but every single time I will get my hopes up, only to have them dashed, and I feel like shit.
B doesn't mean to do this, he apologises every time, and feels fairly shit himself. But I can't keep doing this. I want to have a relationship with him, I want to see him, but the fact that whatever we arrange to do fails is crushing me. I hate it.
I know I need to tell him how I feel, but I'm terrified to do so. His health is so shitty that me telling him this will just add to him feeling worse. I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose him as a friend, or at all, but I want to be in a relationship that's going somewhere, and one where I can actually see my partner. And honestly I just want him.
The straw that finally broke the camels back was yesterday, he was meant to come to mine, but cancelled as he was exhausted. OK, that's fine, except that what is the difference between chilling at mine and chilling at home, when he would be doing exactly the same thing in both places.
I'm burnt out I guess, my frustration with this is getting to the point where I will explode and say something I don't mean. I just feel disappointed and rejected. | Friend/BF cancels on me a lot, with good reason. I can't keep dealing with the disappointment and rejection. |
t3_43ufn7 | relationships | Me [29 F] with my friends [25-29 F] for at least 5-7 years, have a problem with boundaries, and I'm trying to contact her/them both | One of my friends, and maybe more than one, has a problem trying to fuck with my life/investigate my life using her computer. I have drafted an email to these two about their behavior, saying I'd like to meet and come to some kind of understanding about what is or isn't appropriate a) thoughts to be having about someone and b) the kinds of problems you can cause by being a self-righteous know it all.
They don't seem to understand that just because you know someone or that person shares something with you does not mean that they want you to do anything about it. They think they're helping, but they're not.
Anyways, I started writing this email about 6-8 months ago and have been unable to send it. I've edited it a number of times, and in my latest rewritings have tried to give it a lighter note, but I'm not sure if I'm undermining myself by doing so. | My friends screwed around with technology concerning my personal life, have really screwed me over and compromised my relationship with my family and my safety in general, and I need to send them an email. |
t3_4ulb40 | relationships | My [17/M] long distance girlfriend [18/F] of 6 months is ditching me for a day in a 4 day trip for her friends [18/F] birthday party. | Well, I'm visiting my girlfriend for 4 days after 2 months or so of no physical contact (Long distance relationship). We've been planning this trip for around a month and half, while her friend invited my gf to her 18th birthday around a month ago. In the invite she made it clear that I would be welcome to join, as she didn't want to interrupt our plans of being together.
Of course, I wouldn't be here if it were that simple. Today, 3 days before the trip, the birthday girl announces that I'm not welcome anymore because she doesn't feel like it. My girlfriend still wants to go, and I want to let her go, but I'd be left stuck in the city alone for a day with nothing to do, so I'm feeling fairly conflicted about the situation.
So, Reddit, am I right in feeling slightly angry about her decision to go to the birthday party? | planned trip with girlfriend, girlfriend ditches me for friends bday party, am I right to be angered by this? |
t3_138k0u | dating_advice | I may hook up with a girl on the weekend, but know a friend of mine is interested in her too [X- post to r/relationships] | I'm going camping with a bunch of friends for a few days to celebrate graduating. I [m18] have a friend [f17] who's also going. I've known her well for a few months and we've had good chemistry, and I've not asked her out simply because I don't think I know her that well, and am in a bad place personally. But, that won't stand in the way of us hooking up while camping, because - well - I'm sure you understand how it is.
The thing is, one of my guy friends has been pining over the same girl for a while; they've got a bit of history. Stuff like, they've hung out, but never been on a real 'date', and she's been really wishy-washy about the whole ordeal; which leads me to believe that she's not that interested in him. Despite those discrepancies, he's still thinking of making a move. I think everyone who's going knows his intentions (the girl included), but my friend doesn't know that I too am attracted to her.
So, what I'm inquiring about is if he gets turned down or doesn't make a move, but I do hook up with her; is that scummy on my part? I figure that it's not really his business what I do if he gets rejected, but I don't want to make him feel like shit. I've decided against telling anyone that I'm attracted to her, because nothing has really come of that attraction, and it would be especially sappy if my friend ends up with her. | Might hook up with a girl while camping, but friend also likes her, I might get lucky instead of him, but don't want to make him feel bad because of it. What do? |
t3_2pz69r | relationships | My [20M] BF of a year wants to just be FWB with me [20F]? | My boyfriend and I have had a bit of a rocky past, but I always thought to myself "what couple doesn't?". We've cheated on each other before, and flirted with other people, but always managed to move on from it.
Just a few days ago, he said he wants to have an open relationship and see other people, but wants us to stay together without the titles of a relationship. I agreed, with the mindset of "if this is the only way to have him, I guess I'll go along with it".
Things seem different between us now though. He tells me he loves me and our sex hasn't changed, but I can feel a distance between us. We used to make plans to see each other, and we used to hug before one of us left. Now it's just "see you later" and I'm stuck waiting around for a text from him. I'm scared to address the issue because I think he will just completely break up with me, instead of being FWB. What should I do?? | My boyfriend and I are now FWB, but things feel different and I feel like what we had never even happened. |
t3_3w62aj | college | Professor is MIA for finals, how to proceed? | So on Monday of this week (finals week of course) we had major rain storms and my school shut down for two days. Monday was a half day and my final class was at 6pm but the class the school closed at 3pm. I emailed my professor on Monday morning asking what her new final schedule would be, but got no response. Same on tuesday.
We meet every monday and wednesday at 6pm so i just got off campus an hour ago after standing there with half the class. Everyone i talked to said they tried emailing her and got no response either, so we all agreed to email our final paper to her.
I'm just curious to see if anyone thinks i should email the Dean? I'm kind of afraid that she'll tank my grade because of her own fault and that maybe having a paper trail will help if i have to fight for a better grade later. | Professor is missing, no emails/calls. Emailed final paper but worried about her not even grading it and tanking my grade. Any ideas or should i just sit and wait...? |
t3_37j264 | relationships | Me [00 M/F] with my ___ [00 M/F] duration, short-description | So this girl and I are pretty close friends at school, I like her, but I don't know is she likes me, but we are still pretty close.
Recently though, she just ignores me, and other times she just comes to me and starts talking to me like everything's fine. For example, my friends and I are talking at Brunch (High School term for "recess") and she just joins our conversation. I'm ok with that, but when I try to approach her or talk to her, she just loses interest in our conversation and tries to end the conversation quickly.
When I try to say "Hi" to her in the hallways, she just ignores me. Like completely. As if I'm invisible. On the other hand, we chat on Facebook 24/7. I don't think that she is embarrassed being seen with me, because we used to hang out at Brunch and Lunch.
At this point, I just don't know what to do I'm not sure if I'm being too pushy, she just needs time by herself, and I'm pretty sure I have not done anything to piss her off. Or she's trying to friend zone me, but I still want to reach a mutual consensus with her. Please help me put with my situation. Thank you!
I am a High School Freshmen male. | I like girl. Girl is friend with me. Girl now ignores me. Why? Please read above :) ^^^^ |
t3_1mkn79 | relationships | I [22F] am having second thoughts about my new relationship [24M] after about a month, but we've been friends for seven years. | I've been friends with this guy for seven years. He's had feelings for me just about that whole time. I had a boyfriend for five of those years.
A year ago, that boyfriend left me for someone else.
A month ago, I agreed to start "dating" my friend of seven years.
I'm having serious doubts. First of all, my feelings for him nowhere near match his feelings for me. Second, I think about my ex all the time. I miss him, I compare him to this new guy and he wins. Third, I am depressed and busy with school, two things that make me want to seclude myself. So I don't WANT to be around anyone, let alone my new boyfriend.
I don't know how to do this, how to tell him I am not ready for this, without ruining the friendship we had for seven years. I don't want him to be out of my life completely, I just need more time. I need more time before I can consider dating anyone, and I also don't even know if we should be together in this way at all. He's a very sensitive and emotional fellow. Affectionate and kind of dramatic. I'm the opposite. And his emotional needs *annoy* me. ALREADY! After a month!
How can I go about this? I feel terrible, because he's been waiting for this for years...but...I feel trapped and icky. It just doesn't feel right. Help me, reddit! | Friend of seven years is now my boyfriend, but I don't like it. How can I gently tell him we need to step back? We don't work together. |
t3_3dt15i | relationship_advice | I [F 21] feel bad that my friends [F22 & F19] hangout without me and I'm ignored. | Long story short:
I am the mutual friend to both girls. I made plans with F22 and she NEGLECTED to tell me that F19 was joining in with us. I didn't feel good that day so I bailed, but I wasn't asked for a confirmation of my arrival (which is okay I guess. Thats my MO, but not theirs I guess).
F19 has been *very* distant with me since last semester started (January). We were best friends that could tell each other anything and now we barely talk
F22 and I went to the pride parade and said we would hang out more often since I usually hangout with F19 since we're in the same sorority.
What I really want to know is, what do I do? I know its my fault for being angry for being left out BECAUSE of my absence. Am I justified in feeling this way? Can I fix both relationships? Is my jealousy to blame?How do I tell them how I'm feeling? | Girl is mutual friends with 2 girls, one of which has grown distant and it makes OP feel miserable that she has no friends. |
t3_42y7rm | legaladvice | Illinois, USA Situation with my neighbors aggressive guest is not really being handled, what are my options? | In my last post here, I outlined what was happening. The leasing office sent a letter out (presumably to each of the households) Saying that we will hear each other from time to time, and that is to be expected in apartment living. I feel like the apartment has focused on the domestic disturbance call to the police, the initial point of contact between me and said guest. In reality, the issue is with him threatening me, and now harassing my fiance. The letter said he will no longer be there... The man in question has taken to parking in the complex across the street during office hours, and then just walking back to the unit next to mine. (He has been a guest for over a month, and should be on the lease, but is not). What can I do? | Neighbors guest is not actually moving out, despite being told to do so by the leasing office. Has made threats to me, and was harassing my fiance(female). |
t3_2rc1vo | relationships | I [29f] met a woman [34f] online. After an in-person visit, she cut off all contact without an explanation. The pressing question: what do I do with her sweatshirt? | Long story short: we connected on Twitter, live 1000+ miles apart. After a month of constant conversation (texting, phone, Skype, etc) she flew out to visit me. We had a really great few days together. She took my sweatshirt and left hers, and also hid a book she likes in my bedroom for me to find when she left.
And she left... and defriended me on Facebook and hasn't spoken to me since. In the first week I texted a few times (once every couple days) to say "Hey, can you let me know what's going on? If you need space, if you're no longer interested, whatever is fine, but I need to know what's up." No response.
I'm 93% over it (because really, fuck you if you can't be an adult and give me a 2 sentence explanation before total no contact). But ... I still have her damn sweatshirt and this book.
I'm fine sacrificing my sweatshirt (it wasn't a favorite), but what do I do with hers? She'd never given me her mailing address and she won't respond to texts now.
Options, as suggested to me by friends & my own brain:
- **Donate sweatshirt and book.** If she ever asks for it back, tough shit. This feels kind of rude to me. But I've offered to mail it back twice now and she won't respond. So maybe this is the right response?
- **Find her mailing address somehow** (like through a paid service) and mail it back. This feels really intrusive to me.
- **Add it to the list of other shit I'm holding on to from exes.** Absolutely not. Dickens' Bleak House is already taking up enough space in my apartment.
Help me, Redditors. | Girl went no-contact, left me with a sweatshirt and no explanation. What do I do with it now? |
t3_23book | relationships | My co-workers [22-29 M/F] of a year used to invite me out with them every weekend. Now they don't. How can I appropriately | Wow... looks like the subject is truncated.
My co-workers [22-29 M/F] of a year used to invite me out with them every weekend. Now they don't. How can I appropriately address this?
Out of the blue, they have started going out and not inviting me, making it a point to not tell me about it until after the fact when I see the photos on facebook. Today I walked into the break room to one of my co-workers talking about their upcoming karaoke night (including listing who they would invite - my name wasn't mentioned at all) and denying anything when I asked him about it. It was really obvious because I was there for awhile before he noticed I was there.
I really don't recall doing anything that upset anyone in the group, and I still hang out with them during lunch and break - and it feels as normal as it ever was.
Is there an appropriate way to confront them about it? Does anyone have any advice? | Co-workers out of the blue stopped inviting me to their weekend get-togethers. Is it ever appropriate to confront them about it? If so, how can I do so without sounding insecure or desperate? |
t3_3mhy5w | relationships | Me [19 M] Having trouble initiating intimacy with girls. | I have no problem talking to girls, but Im always a little awkward when it comes to initiating intimacy...
I just went on a date (not sure you could call it that, we just went for a walk) and half way through as we were sitting down by the ocean i tried to put my arm around her. She seemed a little surprised. Then again she did tell me she had "trust issues", so i didn't try anything else.
Similar things have happened with other girls. I have a hard time showing that I'm interested in anything romantic. I'm just not sure what to say i guess. Some would call me a "nice guy".
Do you guys have any suggestions on what I could do? what ways can I go about showing that Im romantically interested in a girl? | what ways can I go about showing that Im romantically interested in a girl? Not dating, more so one night stands and such.. |
t3_1ap7ya | relationship_advice | [21/m] i cant trust my girlfriend [18/f] how do i bring it up to her without hurting her? | I was having trouble deciding whether to post in r/WeMetOnline or /r/relationship_advice.. Apologies if I picked the wrong one!
I started dating a girl online over a month and a half ago. Due to a handful of slip ups on her part I recently discovered that she might be lying to me about who she is (Name, race.. even a fake accent). While i'm 99% sure that she is.. i still have 1% of hope. I still have strong feelings for her and have tried not to think about it for a week-ish.. but every time we talk I can't help but wonder if what she says is real or fake. I want to find out who she is and why she did it but I don't want her freaking out over this. Been thinking about it all day and I got nothin. Is it even a good relationship anymore? | Online girlfriend lied about who she is, I found out. How can I bring it up to her without hurting or scaring her? |
t3_prb01 | loseit | Having trouble staying motivated during extreme stress | I am 5'8", 29F, I've lost 19 pounds so far and have about 15 more to go to get to my goal weight of 150 lbs. Right I am going through an incredibly stressful time in my life.
I'm finishing my last semester of school while working full time, my husband has been out of work for awhile (waiting to hear back from one job is taking almost three weeks now), my job is getting very irritating and busy, and on top of all of that yesterday a crackhead tried to get into my car and steal my purse (I was in the car at the time).
I'm having a really hard time finding motivation to exercise and eat right. I've cut my carbs to under 100 per day and all I want is to eat an entire bag of chips and drink myself silly. | I'm so stressed my head is about to explode and I'm having trouble staying motivated to diet and exercise |
t3_lc7es | AskReddit | What's a movie that has altered your way of thinking about life in general? | For me it is Little Miss Sunshine. I see all of the characters as amazing portraits of life-changing experience/decisions. Specifically, Dwayne really spoke to me with how he had his eyes on a huge goal, had an amazing level of commitment working towards that goal, and then met a huge obstacle. I think all of the characters go through this transformation.
The most amazing scene was on the pier. My favorite line is "You do what you want, and fuck the rest," but I felt Frank taught a lesson that a lot of people of all ages can appreciate. He told Dwyane that the times of suffering we all experience are what make is into what we are, etc etc. It was really deep. | Little Miss Sunshine made me think about the hard times in my life and how those have made me into the man I am. |
t3_4n5gkk | tifu | TIFU By texting my Text-Door-Neighbour | This screw up happened a few months ago and only came to mind recently as a TIFU.
I was on holidays with a few friends and was scrolling Facebook when i came across a 'Text door neighbour' challenge. Basically the challenge was adding 1 number to your own phone number and texting them saying 'Hey text-door-neighbour'. After i mentioned the challenge to my friends, i texted my 'neighbour' saying hello. Here's where the shit storm began...
Before i get a text back, i am bombarded with phone calls from the number, and after ignoring a few i decide to answer and find a rather angry middle aged women on the other side. She said she has contacted police and they are tracing my call, to which i immediately drop the act, apologise and try to explain to her what's going on. She ignores my explanation and says that her house was robbed (She must have percived the text as 'next door neighbour') the very same day and she's scared and confused at how i got her number (She wasn't very bright). After the phone call ended due to some awkward silence, i sent her another text explaining what happened and how i wasn't robbing her. She then said that she was already at the police station giving my number to them as a 'Suspect'.
I've been on the run ever since. | Sent a text to my 'Text-door-neighbour' as a joke, neighbour thought i was threatening her. |
t3_sfhn5 | relationship_advice | My boyfriend has started moving into my new home without asking my permissions first. | I am 26 and my boyfriend is 28. We've been together for three years.
I just landed a beautiful triplex that I have been saving up for for almost a year. It's technically a two bedroom but one of the bedrooms is so small I was thinking about using it for an office. My boyfriend has been a huge help to me in finding the perfect place, mostly because he's been through it so many times before. He lives in a house with two other roommates and I used to live in an apartment with one roommate.
The other day my boyfriend showed up with boxes of his clothes and dishes. I have never asked him to move in with me. I was actually going to ask him once I had gotten all of my things moved from my old apartment into my new place, but he never gave me a chance.
Is it right that I'm upset about this? I did give him clear signs that I wanted him to live with me here but I never popped the question, so to speak. I was actually planning on doing it in a really cutesy way but now I feel like I have been robbed of that chance. | My boyfriend has started moving in with me before I had the chance to ask him and now I feel robbed of an opportunity. Am I over reacting? |
t3_3enciw | tifu | TIFU by calling a locksmith when I was "locked out" of my car. | I'll preface this by saying I'm usually not a stupid man but I was at the end of my third 16 hour shift in a row and I was very tired. I'll make this quick:
I got off work, went out to my car, hit the button for the doors on my remote unlocker - as usual. Nothing happened. I tried it a few more times, battery must be dead. I stand there for 10 minutes, mashing the little button, hoping for enough juice to open the doors. Nada.
I call a locksmith, explain that I'm locked out of my car. He says he'll be right over. 20 minutes later he arrives. He walks up with his tools, inserts a thing that looks like a blood pressure cuff in the door jamb. He starts making conversation as it inflates, pushing the door open:
"So locked your keys in the car? No problem sir, I'll have it open in a minute."
"No, my keys are right here, my key fob is dead." I replied.
He stops and for about 10 seconds. Doesn't say a word. He sees my keys in my hands. Takes them from me, inserts them in the lock and opens the door.
I was mortified. I was so in a habit of opening the doors with my remote fob that I entirely forgot that keys could be used to unlock cars manually. He started laughing so hard I thought he was going to have an aneurysm. After he stopped laughing, he told me there was no charge. The story he'd have to tell was worth the drive out. | Key fob battery died, I was so in the habit of using it that I forgot keys could open car doors. Called locksmith to come laugh at my stupidity. |
t3_1e5oz9 | relationships | Boyfriend [25M] tells me [26F] he finds his potential roommate attractive | This afternoon my boyfriend [25M] (1 month of dating, ~2 weeks of exclusivity) brought up that he's thinking about moving in with a friend who happens to be a girl and he wanted to know if I was cool with it. I said I was and I meant it - no problems whatsoever, totally trust him, and we've only been dating for a month anyway so I don't feel like my opinion should matter *too* much. However, it was nice that he asked and I appreciated the gesture.
His reaction to my "yeah, it's fine" was to tell me that he's glad because this particular girl is really cool and while he isn't attracted to her in the same way he is to me, he assures me that he's attracted to her style.
I asked him what he meant by 'attracted to her style' and he said that it was his way of acknowledging that she's an attractive girl and that he felt like he had to throw that in there to be respectful of her after saying that he wasn't attracted to her.
Am I being weird for suddenly feeling really uncomfortable about this whole thing given that we've only been dating one month? Why did he feel the need to inform me that he realizes his potential new roommate is attractive? | Boyfriend of 1 month informs me of his plans to take a female roommate then when I say I'm cool with it, he informs me he thinks she's attractive. Wtf? |
t3_3evajl | tifu | TIFU by wanting to be Slenderman | This happened the last Halloween.
I am not the kind of person that is into going to parties but I was feeling like the time has come and I needed to have the greatest Halloween. But I didn't have any costume for the event, so I went to the mall. Then I saw this Slenderman costume which looks incredible in the picture and also had 30% discount (It was like 90 dollars without it, wtf Mexico). It was perfect, I put it on and saw that it was fine.
Then the day of the party arrived and it was extremely cold, so my friend (yeah, that friend the men have) was calm down and feeling short. So I just put my costume on and get into the party.
It was horrible, no one knew what was Slenderman and then a lot of people thought that my costume was something like a stripper. Then a girl that I liked a lot was laughing like there was no tomorrow. I begun getting nervous and so the cold went away and my little friend decided it was time to be the protagonist. Holy shit, it was like if I didn't have anything put on, I was dying from all the glances I was getting. And to finished my fuck up then my friends from my old school arrived, thankfully someone gave me something to hide my dick and my shame. | Using a slenderman costume in a party no one knew what he was, being told the costume is for stripper and showed my dick to all my friends. |
t3_3vggaf | relationships | Me [23 M] with my girlfriend[23 F] 4 1/2 years, she has serious motivation issues, nothing is working, but I love her so much. | Be sure to explain in detail with line breaks.
Ok, so just for a backstory, I'm 23 and so is my girlfriend. In the 5 years we've known each other/dated, I've graduated school, have had various "moving up the totem pole" jobs(I'm a full-time electrician, and I'm going to school for my associate's degree for applied science). In the same amount of time, she's failed twice to get her high school diploma. She's had a few O.K. jobs for our age, however, her ambition to better her position(i.e., get a manager position job at her retail job/get a degree, certificate or her G.E.D.)for our future, is to be greatly desired. She's been my rock in tumultuous times but I just can't shake the fact that she's not going to be more than she is now. I've tried to motivate her and get her in programs to help her situation. She's just not moving in the right direction and having since moved in with her, I feel like I'm beginning to gain some of those "slacker" traits. Either I love her, or I'm in love with the idea of her supporting nature. I seriously need some advice from a girl, because this is emotionally killing me, and I really need to move on. Being in a stasis like this is driving me mad. Please shed some insight, anything is appreciated | in essence, we've been through hell, and I feel like I'm moving to be successful while she's putting forth minimal effort to say she's helping for the last 4 1/2 years. What should I do? |
t3_41x4c5 | tifu | TIFU by making a widow cry | This happened today and it's my first ever Reddit post!
BACK STORY: I work with pensions. I am amazing at it and generally enjoy my job. I like most old people. I help these people retire, explain pension benefits, help them with whatever updates life has brought to them, find out why they haven't gotten a payment, act as a switchboard to the other retiree benefits, and basically anything else involving retiree's pensions. In the pension field we have access to a lot of personal information and because of HIPAA, I have to have the participant authorize each call or have a Power of Attorney (POA) on file for the person in order to speak with anyone else. I need to verify this on each call with extremely few exceptions. As a result of the type of pensions I work with, and the age/generation of participants, almost all Participants are male and almost all spouses are female.
STORY: So one of the sadder updates I make is when a Participant dies. Today an elderly woman called. As I was verifying the call I clearly saw that this record belongs to a male participant, because of HIPAA I cant speak to her unless he is there, or if she is his POA or widow. As I am authorizing the call from her providing his information, I ask her what the purpose of the call is, hoping I don't have to deny her for not being a POA or widow. She tells me she is calling to report that he passed a few days ago, but was too shaken up to call. I exclaim "Perfect!" in a super excited voice like I had killed her sweet, Geriatric Prince Charming myself. It was what will forever be one of my most shame inducing moments as she started to snuffle while I tried to explain why I'm not gleeful that her husband of over 55 years has died. | I accidentally shouted "Perfect!" when a widow told me her husband died as if I'd joyfully killed him myself. |
t3_2atomf | relationships | I [25 M] like a girl who has never had a boyfriend [22 F] I freeze up when I try to talk to her. | I just met this girl through mutual friends and we have hung out a few times now but never alone.
She is very gorgeous and sweet. Yet she has never had a boyfriend or a date. She seems a lot smarter than the other girls not quick to jump into relationships and she tries really hard to turn down guys who try to take interest or flirt with her.
I have come to find her very attractive and I have however had a few girlfriends and find it very easy speaking to women. I would say I am pretty handsome but not like super good looking.
Our mutual friends think I would be able to date her but I was told to just take it slow and get to know her first since I barely know her.
She however knows I like her and has sort of guarded herself against me. She told a friend that she thinks that I have just an infatuation with her and I wasn't really interested in her but I actually am. Every time I try to talk to her she would reply with one letter words or if I ask her to hang out she denies my request and my only chance to hang out with her is if another mutual friend asks her to hang out and invites me along.
I know she isn't completely uninterested in me but someone being single so long has figured out to not just jump in a relationship right away. I am determined to win her heart over but I kind of get too shy and awkward whenever we go hang out in a group environment despite being fine for me to talk to any other girls.
Do you have any tips for me on girls like this and my shyness for when we hang out in person? | I like a girl who has never had a bf, I am too shy to talk to her when we hang out and I want to get past her walls and get her to be my gf. Help? |
t3_2dugo2 | weddingplanning | Adventures in tux shopping or why Mens Wearhouse lost my business | Can I vent for a second about Mens Wearhouse? Sorry for the wall of text. I know we have talked in the past about the experiences at Davids Bridal but I never expected walk out of a Mens Wearhouse almost in tears until my experience today.
FH and I go there, I have an idea of the color tux I want and we have a swatch of my girls dresses and we are the first appointment of the day. The woman is super disorganized and when I ask to look at the tuxes, she gives me attitude and points at the grey and black we have. We are her only customers but she will only let my FH try on the tux jacket, not even grab a vest off the rack and bring it over to him to try it on and see how it matches. Is that customary there? I wasn't sure but there was no need to act like I was asking too much. I wanted to be sure it all matched. Apparently I was annoying her by asking questions about the different tuxes and if she only had three colors in tuxes.
She eventually said as if she were talking to a child "Well you might be better off building it online and calling us since it seems you don't know what you want" Um, lady I do know what I want but you are zero help in explaining or being accommodating at all. We were there about 20 minutes and I was given attitude 2-3 times. I ended up taking her card (FH made me) and walked out. Next stop was Jos. A Bank and found out that frickin Mens Wearhouse bought them out and they couldn't guarantee they will have everything available after december.
Best decision we made was going to a local store that the Jos. A Bank woman recommended that could order whatever we wanted and had similar stock. The sales woman was juggling 4 other people but she made us feel great and let FH try on everything he wanted and even suggested great things. Not sure if it was just my experience or if thats they way they did things but the attitude was not needed. Glad we ended up where we did though. | Mens Wearhouse lady had stick up her ass and acted like I was a child. Walked out almost crying and ended up at a fantastic local store and getting everything we wanted |
t3_4zok06 | relationship_advice | Can feelings make a comeback? [F/22] [M/24] | Hi Reddit.
My friend and I developed feelings for each other, but we couldn't really do anything with them because we're both in a relationship.
This caused quite a lot of distress, neither of us knew what to do and we've had a lot of internal conflicts due to this. To the point where we wanted to say sweet things/flirt with each other, but they felt like they were "too much". Not because we didn't like saying these things to each other, but because talking about the subject/giving and receiving compliments fueled the conflict within ourselves. We didn't know what to do with this, at all, and decided to just.. conceal it, knowing this felt unnatural and would be hard.
This was some time ago, and my feelings for her have diminished in a way because I concealed them. Yes I know, this is probably not the right thing to do. I mean I don't think concealing a feeling is the right thing to do like.. Ever. It's just not fair to the other person, even when it's probably for the best sometimes. Anyway, I think that they're still there, but I've got them in control.. I think.
When I told her that they had diminished, she got really upset and asked me whether I thought they would come back. I thought this was a strange question, as she had told me previously that they had diminished for her because she was done with the internal conflict.
I didn't want to tell her that they're still there, because I wanted to avoid conflict. I made her really upset nevertheless.. Which kind of made me wonder, when feelings do go away.. Can they ever resurface? | Told a friend that my feelings for her have diminished, she got upset and asked me if I thought that they could make a comeback. |
t3_1jwp0o | relationships | My[24/F] partner [24M] of nearly 5 years is very insecure about his ability to make me happy. | Let me just say this: this is the man I am going to marry. He makes my life infinitely better and deserves the world for it.
With that said, he believes he does not/cannot make me happy. If I am unhappy abouit something small (say, he doesn't clean the apartment like he said he would), he takes it to mean that he is a total fuck up and that he's a bad boyfriend--and will tell me as much.
I have learned to wind back my temper and be more level-headed and conscious how my reactions affect him. I offer constant encouragement to him about how happy he makes me and such, but nothing has seemed to affect his feelings of worthlessness. It has gotten to the point where it is aggrivating to hear him say such untrue things and start talking about how I could do so much better yadda yadda...
It started a few years ago--he cheated on me one night and we almost broke up because of it, but I forgave him and we moved on as a couple. I think he feels some amount of guilt for hurting me and cannot let go of it. How can I get him to see how wonderful he is to me? | The man I am in love with doesn't see how good he is to me. How can I get him to be more confident in our relationship? |
t3_4fjsyq | relationships | I [17 F] want to be a better girlfriend for my boyfriend [17 M] of 1yr6m | I have realised over the past few months that I have very controlling and needy tendencies.
These include getting angry at him when he can't text me all the time and becoming anxious and worried when we do not talk for a long period of time.
I am aware this stems from a bunch of issues that I am trying to fix, however, I still see that my jealousy and my 'crazy' flares up at the worst of times.
(A good example is today, I got upset that we couldn't see each other however instead of it turning into something I managed to bite my tongue as I knew I had no good reason to be angry.)
I've given him a lot to deal with - my mood swings, my clingy antics and my anxiety and right now, as I am in a better place, I would like to give him the chance to be loved and show him that I am better.
How do I go about showing him that?
Also, how do I go about not being heavily jealous and therefore causing arguments or making him grow tired of my insecurities?
I also want to know how to not grow impatient and angry when he says he will do things - like call me at a certain time - and then doesn't, because I believe I shouldn't get angry about either.
Thank you (in advance) for any replies | I can be controlling and clingy and would like to better myself for my boyfriend, I want to know how to go about doing this! |
t3_2iw6au | relationships | I read my (26M) girlfriend's (25F) journal and I don't know what to do. | First off, let me say I know it's shitty that I was snooping. She's been so distant lately and I wanted to get some insight into why. Ordinarily I wouldn't but I guess she forgot to put it away and left it out on our bed instead of inside her nightstand.
We've been together for 2 years and have lived together for just under a year. Essentially, she wrote that she loves me, we have good sex, and I'm an excellent boyfriend, but she madly wants to fuck other guys. To the point where she doesn't know whether she wants to be in a relationship or not. She mentions specific guys in it, guys I know. Guys who I know that flirt with her and I've accused her of flirting back with. She's always said I was wrong and have nothing to worry about though.
I don't know how to take this. It says she hasn't acted on these urges yet but has gotten "close". So that's good, I guess.
I love her tons, to the point where I thought there was a good chance we would be in it for the long haul. This just knocks me back. I love this girl, and I want to work through this if she's willing. At the same time, every time she's out and I'm not with her, I'm gonna worry. I don't want to deal with that all the time, and I feel like I need somebody who would have more respect and loyalty.
I need your advice. Should I bring this up to her? How should I do that? I know it's not fair that I read it. Would I be making a mistake even staying with her? These two years have been great and I never expected her to feel this way. Any advice is much appreciated. Thanks. | Been in a great relationship for 2 years\\\\she's been distant lately\\\\read her journal (shitty, I know)\\\\she wants to fuck other dudes but hasn't acted on that yet\\\\Ouch. |
t3_ynu7t | AskReddit | What is the identity you work to maintain in public and how does that differ from your inner one? | I am the type of girl you will never expect to have a dirty double life. I'd be a perfect candidate for office (great education, minority, female, gorgeous). I've been described my ex- boyfriends early in the relationship as classy and almost old-fashioned. I'm an eloquent confident speaker and carry myself very well for such a young age.
***
I have more nude pictures circulated around the internet than I would like to admit.
I had an okcupid so all my messages can be retrieved and I have said some scandalous things as well as post risque pictures.
(Mostly for the kick I get out of all the foreplay and desire from strangers-although they were are revolting)
I've dabbled in some drugs weed, xanax, cocaine, mushrooms, acid, vicodin.
I'll also be screwed if anyone decides to seize my computer, i love me some rape, child, drugged, beastiality type porn.
I've waited a month and a half to kiss a guy I was dating but have fucked a guy ten minutes after meeting him.
I love how eccentric I can be and you will never guess from a pepite, beautiful, educated latina. | In other words; entertain me with your contradictions (for lack of a better word). Or what makes you interesting in your eyes. |
t3_4nphvi | relationship_advice | I [22/m] got 'caught secretly meeting' my girlfriend's [21/F] best friend | I've been together with my girlfriend for a while now and over time we decided we would want to get married. I've moved overseas and live together with her. I'm planning a surprise to officially propose to my girlfriend in about 6 months. Because this surprise requires quite some planning and reservations I sent her best friend a message on Facebook asking if she could help me (I haven't met her before). Because I live together with my girlfriend we decided to meet up while she was at work.
We met twice and the second time she went with me to some jewelry stores (I'm not fluent in the language yet, so she helped me with my questions). When we were shopping around apparently one of my girlfriend's friends saw us and sent a message to my girlfriend.
So when my girlfriend got home from work I was very surprised when she asked about it and I didn't really give an answer (Saying ' Oh Im planning a surprise proposal and your friends are helping me' would've ruined the surprise a bit..). So obviously she is mad at me now and Im not sure what to do. It will kinda ruin the surprise but I feel like telling the truth is my only option now? | Planning surprise proposal together with my girlfriend's best friend, got 'caught' when meeting up with her. Not sure what to do now. |
t3_352slq | relationships | Is this girl [20s F] interested if she offered me [20s M] a ride home? | I'm a male and in my 20s. Last semester I was friends with this girl since we were part of one of the school's club. I also met her roommate once and we had a pretty brief conversation. She is a female and also in her 20s. We've since said hi a few times while running into each other in the library. I've been really busy this semester so I haven't joined that club this semester
Last week we coincidentally met at a meet up event, and we talked a lot longer this time. At the end she offered me a ride back to campus since I took the bus to get there. Because we barely knew each other , is this a sign she's interested?
We will probably meet at that event tomorrow as well so if she offers me a ride again should I just ask her out? | I bumped into a friend's roommate at a meetup event. We barely knew each other and she offered me a ride home. Is this a sign of interest? |
t3_3ecid6 | legaladvice | (Louisiana) 27 Male Marijuana Possession Charge, police error during arrest. | Hello. Summary: I was given a marijuana possession ticket in 2012, which I ignored. I was given a potential second marijuana possession charge. Cop wrote it was the first.
Last night I was being driven home from work when my friend made an illegal turn. He u-turned onto my block and I got out of the car to walk into my house. The cops pull up behind us and get out, asking for my ID. I asked if I was being detained, and he said yes because I was in the car when the illegal turn was made.
They searched the car and found weed. I was already out of the car when they pulled up but they searched me an found my pipe. He wrote me a ticket for simple possession first offense and paraphernalia.
Here are my questions:
I ignored my first charge pretty much. I started the diversion but never went. I heard that the new law recently signed makes the second offense count as the first. Is this true?
Can I be really be charged with possession even though they found the weed in his car and not on my person? How should I have gone about not being detained and searched?
Is there any good reason not to ignore this one? I will continue to smoke weed. The only way I would get caught is to be caught with weed again, which would be a second charge anyway.
I really need some advice here. | Stopped for second Marijuana Possession charge, 1st was in 2012. Ignored first charge and want to know if I can wait out the second. |
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